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adoremoonie · 5 months

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The Mixed Legacy Challenge for The Sims 3

This is (gonna be) a 10 generation legacy challenge. I came up with this challenge simply because I could not decide what legacy challenge I wanted to do so I did a mix of all my favourite ones. Including Not So Berry, Jam Legacy, Zodiac Legacy & All In One Lepacy! So all credit goes to the creators! ପ(๑•ᴗ•๑)ଓ

Rules: ☆ Finish the rules of every generation, but there are different options for some generations so you can do whatever fits your gameplay preference more!

☆ There is a color for every generation if you want berry sims etc!

☆ There is a family trait that you choose that every generation heir will have. If you can't have a trait because of your family trait you just swap out that one for one similiar!

☆ You got to have this mod to be able to give your sims all the traits I have given them OR you could cheat them when they age up and change them in CAS OR just give them 1-2 of the traits. Would also recommend NRAAS mod aswell because of the money changes etc!

☆ Most importantly do what you want and have fun!

Now for the generations...

Generation 1: Purple You left everything you know behind, escape your past for a new beginning. Finally start that family you always wanted with someone new. You want to change, but can you?

Traits: Family Trait, Kleptomaniac, Nurturing, Rebellious, Frugal Job: Start at the cemetery then switch to criminal OR kleptomaniac full time LTW: Become a master chief OR The emperor of evil OR Possession is Nine Tenths of the law

☆ Master athletic and martial arts skills ☆ Use the kleptomaniac trait to provide for your family ☆ Get with your partner and marry them fast ☆ Get the death flower (perhaps at the cemetery?) ☆ 3 or more children

Generation 2: Yellow You don’t want to end up like your parent. You have dreams, big dreams! And you will do everything to be the biggest star, hopefully your family name won’t ruin that.

Traits: Family Trait, Star Quality, Diva, Lucky, Ambitious Job: Singer LTW: Vocal Legend OR Lifestyle of the rich and famous

☆ Have a band as a teenager ☆ When you become an YA you quit the band to go solo ☆ Master an instrument (guitar, piano etc) ☆ Become a five star celebrity ☆ Marry a big celebrity ☆ Only have one child

Generation 3: Red You lived in luxury thanks to your parent but did that make you a little spoiled? Maybe. you say as you move to a big mansion in the tropics. But you do actually have a job! You are a lifeguard and you save tons of cute tourists everyday. Yeah, maybe you did buy an hotel just to flex but can't be that hard to run one of those?

Traits: Family, Great kisser, Loves to swim OR Sailor, Party animal, Snob Job: Lifeguard then Resort owner LTW: Resort Empire OR Seaside Savior

☆ Have only one child ☆ Buy and run an hotel when you are an adult ☆ Reach level 5 of scuba diving ☆ Have one of those people you saved OR a mermaid be your future partner ☆ Own a house boat

Generation 4: Blue You had a little bit of a rough childhood, sure you were rich but your snobby parent barely gave you any of that rich money so you start working on cars on the side to make some side money, but turns out you LOVE it. You’ve always craved that big family life and you will spoil your children rotten in ALL the ways.

Traits: Family Trait, Family oriented, Slob, Schmoozer, Vehicle Enthusiast LTW: Surrounded by Family Job: Work at a part-time job OR Daycare before you quit to start making cars for a living

☆ Meet your partner in high school and marry as soon as you both age up to YA ☆ Be best friend with all your children ☆ Fix up ATLEAST 10 cars ☆ Throw family parties every season ☆ Buy every thing your children wishes for

Generation 5: Green You had an amazing but messy childhood. You had everything. A big loving family! But that also meant no privacy and you couldn’t do what you love the most without your siblings disturbing, science. So now you just want to be alone.

Traits: Family Trait, Loner, Eccentric, Neat, Grumpy LTW: Monster Maker Job: Science Career or none

☆ Move to a new town and the house should be as far away from the town as possible and never move out ☆ Make imaginary friend real ☆ Have ONE friend ☆ Marry your (only) friend OR an alien/imaginary friend/simbot ☆ Master the inventing skill ☆ Build two simbots optional: have an alien baby

Generation 6: Pink Having been stuck in the same town, in the same house, you need something new! You need adventure! And you want to capture it all. But you also have to get home to look after your plants.

Traits: Family Trait, Daredevil, Outgoing, Gatherer/Green Fingers, Adventurous LTW: World class gallery OR Great explorer

☆ Go to China, Egypt and France ☆ Master the photographing and gardening skills ☆ Complete atleast 3 thombs at each location ☆ Marry someone from China, France or Egypt ☆ Get atleast one VISA ☆ Have a big garden with every plant

Generation 7: Orange You have always loved horses, a horse girl (or boy, or person) if you will. But having your own horses and a big ranch is expensive and your parent wasted it all on traveling so you work smart not hard!

Traits: Family Trait, Equestrian, Horse Lover, Dislikes children, Mooch LTW: Gold Digger OR The Jockey Job: Any job before you get married then quit

☆ Start with 30 000 simoleons ☆ Marry rich and have them mysteriously die ☆ Master the nectar making skill and riding skills ☆ Win a competition on the highest level for racing ☆ Have 3 or more horses ☆ Have twins

Generation 8: Grey Yes you are twins, you look exactly like each other but your personalities couldn’t be more different. One of you got your nose in the books since you had the chance, always got good grades, got the diploma and finally got your dream job. While the other wasn’t as lucky in school, it was just too hard but you still go to university with your twin and you might have not gotten the best grades but you sure had fun and also met your soulmate.

☆ Have both twins as heir ☆ Go to university with both twins

Twin 1 Traits: Family Trait, Over-emotional, Irresistible, Workaholic, Non-Committal Job: Politcian OR Doctor LTW: Master Romancer OR perfect student ☆ Have a rocky relationship with your partner/partners ☆ Get married for the first time as an older elder ☆ Max charisma skill ☆ Only have one child or none ☆ Good grades ☆ Get the naughty reputation Optional: Get two diplomas

Twin 2 Traits: Family Trait, Loser, Artistic, Easily impressed, Nurturing LTW: Jack of all trades ☆ Have 5 or more different jobs ☆ Get fired from at least 3 jobs ☆ Meet the love of your life in university ☆ Max painting OR sculpting skill ☆ Bad grades ☆ Have two or more children ☆ Help children with all skills ☆ Get the Eternally Faithful reputation

Generation 9: Plum Your parent got you this supernatural book for you when you were a kid about werewolves, witches, vampires… All of it! Ever since then you have been hooked. Can you find it out in the real world too? And of course, your cat is sleeping right beside you while you read.

Traits: Family Trait, Bookworm, Supernatural Fan, Socially Awkward OR Brooding, Cat Lover LTW: Any from the Supernatural expension Job: Fortune teller OR Ghost hunter

☆ Max the writing skill (writing supernatural books) ☆ Don’t have a tv in your house, only books and computer ☆ Marry a supernatural creature ☆ Become a supernatural creature ☆ Own 3 cats or more Optional: Find cure to become human again

Generation 10: Turquoise

In the works...

If you play this challenge you can use the hashtag #mixed legacy or tag me!

and please give any feedback you might have! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

#ts3 challenge #ts3 legacy #sims 3 #ts3 #sims 3 legacy #sims 3 legacy challenge #mixed legacy

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moondustpugh · 8 days

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Written in the Stars

Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

Summary: You are a believer in fate but after getting your heart broken, you had stopped believing it. Until you met Joe. Suddenly, it got you questioning if fate is real or not.

Author's Note: I truly enjoyed going back and re-editing this story and re-publishing it. As per requested by everyone, I will be re-publishing Permanent December. It's my very first Joe fic series, so it's very special to me. Anyway, thank you for the support with this series! :)

Wordcount: 2.2K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five - part six - part seven - part eight - part nine - part ten - epilogue

London, United Kingdom.

“Sofia? That’s the same name as Sofia!”

Sara chuckled softly, pulling her ten year old daughter closed to her side. She brushed her brunette hair softly as Sofia said, “It is me.”

Sara chuckled again as she heard that small gasp, making Sofia giggle quietly too.

“But what happened to the Prince and the Princess?”

“Rosie, don’t be dumb. Isn’t it obvious? The story is about mum and dad.”

Rosie pouted at her older brother as her warm brown eyes turned into puppy dog ones before burying her face on Joe’s chest. She sobbed quietly as Joe cooed her and pulled her close in his arms and brushed her brown curly hair.

“Francis, what did I tell you about being mean to your little sister, and we don’t call anyone that word.” You told your six your old son, who was sitting next to you.

Francis hung his head low, his curls falling down his forehead as he let out a sigh. “I’m sorry, Rosie.”

The fireplace warmed the living room that all of you were sitting in. Snow was falling outside as Christmas approached the city of London in just a few days. The kids had been wanting to hear a story before bed and all night long, your four year old daughter had been repeatedly asking you to tell her a nice love story about a Prince and a Princess. Wes and Sara had dropped Sofia off at your house for the weekend since they wanted to go on a nice weekend getaway alone. You honestly didn’t mind since Sofia was such a sweetheart and very mature for her age. She loved to help you bake in the kitchen with Rosie, while Joe would watch television with Francis or play video games in the living room.

“It’s okay.” Rosie pouted as Joe smiled down at his daughter, who was sitting on his lap.

Rosie was a Daddy’s girl. Always had been since she was born. You always wondered why she was so attached to Joe even when she was just a few months old. As she grew older, you could see why. She looked like her father with those brunette curly hair and big chocolate button eyes, and she was starting to be like him too. Everywhere Joe went, she would instantly follow him, ask him questions about his job and how she could also be in the movies. When she was around two, she had given you the hardest time every time Joe had to fly to the States to do some interview or shoot a movie. Rosie would always stay by the window and wait for Joe. She would ask you a million times every day when Joe would come home.

“Sweetheart, he’s gonna be here by Friday.” You would tell her. “In the meantime, why don’t you help mum bake some cookies, yeah?”

That was how you and Rosie had gotten closer. Through baking. She certainly still chose to hang out with Joe most of the time and even go with him on movie sets, so she could see how his movies were made. But you were glad that you had found something that you and your daughter could do together. Francis, on the other hand, was always next to you. He was always interested in what you do at work, asks you questions about how to make friends at school because he was a shy kid and sometimes, he would even ask if he could just stay home instead. You worry about Francis sometimes because he always had a hard time making friends at school. So, you always tried to understand him, but you also wanted your two children to get along since Francis always loved to tease Rosie.

“Mum, what happened next?” Rosie asked again, her eyes then turned to gazed up at Joe.

Joe cleared his throat and said, “Well, one year later, they got married and then after that, they moved to London with your Uncle Wes, Aunt Sara and Sofia.”

“Your mum was pregnant at that time with Francis.” Sara added. “She had the hardest time in the hospital.”

Francis gazed up at you and asked, “How come?”

“You just wouldn’t get out.” You chuckled, poking the tip of his nose lightly.

“She was in the hospital for 18 hours.” Joe continued.

“And you, my darling…” Joe tickled Rosie on her side, making her giggle and held onto Joe’s hand. “You were just too excited to get out that you were two days early.”

Rosie clenched her small fist into Joe’s shirt as she tried to stand up on his lap. Rosie wrapped her tiny arms around Joe and hugged him tightly, making Joe smile and held her in his arms and softly rubbed her back.

“Such a Daddy’s girl.” Wes commented, making everyone chuckle softly.

“I love mum too.” Rosie pouted, laying her head on Joe’s shoulder as she yawned.

“I think it’s time for bedtime.” Sara got up from the sofa.

“Yeah, I’ll put her to bed.” Joe got up from where he was sitting and went down the hall to set Rosie down for sleep.

Joe set Rosie on her bed gently and pulled the covers over her, tucking her in as Rosie gave him a sweet smile and said, “One day, I want to have my soulmate.”

Joe laughed softly, kissing her forehead. “Not until when you’re 40.”

Rosie pouted at Joe’s little tease. “Goodnight, sweetheart. I love you.”

“Goodnight. I love you too, Dad.” Rosie smiled, closing her eyes and hugging her little stuffed teddy bear that was next to her.

Joe stared at his daughter for a moment, brushing her hair softly. Tonight, looking back at his journey with you, he couldn’t help but think about something he read the other day in Sara’s bookshop. Sometimes, he still couldn’t wrap his mind that he has this family. That he has his beautiful family with you. It made all the wait and the complicated situations before seemed all worth it.

“Dad?” Francis appeared at the doorway in his pajamas.

Joe looked over his shoulder and got up from where he was kneeling. “Hey.”

“Mum said it’s bedtime.” Francis reached for his hand. “D… Do you think you could tuck me in?”

“I thought you said you were getting too old for that?” Joe raised his brow.

Francis shrugged his shoulders and looked down at his feet. “Maybe… not.”

A small smile slowly tugged on Joe’s face as he picked up his son. Francis laid his head on Joe’s shoulder and said, “Dad?”

“Yeah?” Joe set Francis down on his bed and tucked him in.

“Do you think… Will I ever make friends?”

Joe looked down at his son. You and Joe had talked about this, and Joe knew how worried you were that Francis felt lonely at school. Joe could see it in Francis’ eyes too that he felt lonely and insecure over the fact that he was the only one who was always left out in school, especially during team activities because no one would pick him to join the group.

“Of course.” Joe reassured him. “You’re a wonderful person, and I know someone will see that. You know I was the same way before? Then, I met your Uncle Wes and ever since then, we were inseparable. Just like your mum and your Aunt Sara.”

Francis’ expression suddenly lightened as he gave Joe a small smile. “Thanks Dad. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Joe leaned down to kiss Francis’ forehead before making his way to the door. “Oh, and if they don’t want to play with you, you always have me.”

Francis smiled at his father before closing his eyes and went to sleep. Joe quietly closed the door behind him and made his way back to the living room, finding you and Sara talking to each other.

“That sounds heavenly.” Joe heard you murmur to Sara. “I’m sure you two will have so much fun.”

“Yeah, I think we kinda need it, you know?” Sara grinned.

“Maybe you two will have too much fun.” You nudged Sara, teasing her as she felt her cheeks heat up.

“Please.” Sara laughed softly. “Maybe.”

You gasped softly, surprised that she actually agreed. Your eyes widened in surprise. “Really?”

“Yeah, I think it’s time.”

You let out a small squeal as you pulled her into a hug. “Then, definitely have so much fun.”

Sara laughed and turned to where Sofia was sitting on the sofa. “My sweet, come here.”

Sofia put her book down and walked over to where you and Sara were. You watched as Sara kneeled down in front of her and smiled.

“We’ll be back in two days. Be good to your Aunt and Uncle, okay?”

“Of course, mum. I love you.” Sofia smiled, giving her a hug. “I’ll miss you and dad.”

Sara smiled, hugging her daughter. “We’ll miss you too.”

“Okay, I think we have to go, darling.” Wes chimed in as he knelt down in front of Sofia also and pulled her into a hug. “I love you, darling.”

“I love you too, Dad.” Sofia smiled, giving both of her parents kisses on the cheek.

“C’mon. I’ll put you to bed.” You reached for Sofia’s hand.

“It’s okay, Auntie. I can do it myself.”

You raised your brows at Sara as she looked at her daughter proudly. You couldn’t help but chuckle and nodded your head. Sofia truly was so mature for her age, and Sara and Wes did raise her very well. You felt Joe’s hand on the small of your back as you both walked Sara and Wes out the door.

“Well, you two have so much fun.” You gave them both a hug.

“Thank you.” Wes smiled. “And thank you for taking care of Sofia.”

“Of course. She is so precious, and the kids love her when she’s around.” You said.

“Okay, well, we gotta go.” Sara and Wes gave the both of you one last hug before making their way to their car.

You took a deep breath and closed the door behind you. You raised your brow at Joe when you saw him looking at you with his adoring eyes.

“Come here.” Joe reached for your hand.

“Why?” You laughed, sliding your hand in his.

“Just come on.” Joe nodded his head towards the direction of the kitchen.

You watched as he stopped in the middle of the kitchen and left you there as he walked over to the speaker and played a slow song for the both of you in a low volume.

“Can I have this dance, miss?” Joe bowed his head at you with one hand reaching for yours.

You laughed, shaking your head as you took his hand. You gazed up at him with a smile on your face, your eyes locking with his chocolate button ones.

“That story was romantic, wasn't it?” Joe asked you the same question he had asked you back in New York when you heard Mr. Cheng’s story but this time, he was referring to your story with him.

You hummed softly and said, “It really was.”

“You know I remembered something earlier. Something I read at the bookshop.” Joe murmured.

“Yeah?”

“Did you know in Korea, there’s this thing called “In-Yun,” which means fate.”

“Oh god, Joe.” You laughed softly, shaking your head as the both of you continued to dance.

“No, hear me out.” Joe chuckled. “They said that In-Yun is fated paths that entwine two people together throughout their past and future lives and they said even just a brush of a shoulder with a stranger, they said that it must mean they mean something to each other in their past lives. Then, they said that if you had married your soulmate, it’s said to be the result of 80,000 layers of In-Yun in over 80,000 lifetimes.”

You grinned, shaking your head. It had been so long since you and Joe talked about the whole “fate” thing. It also had been a while since you thought about it. You were just surprised that Joe still thought about it until now, especially that you were the one who loved to believe in those things before.

“So, do you think we have 80,000 layers of In-Yun because we’re married?” You asked.

“I told you once that every path I tried to go to away from you, it always leads to you no matter what.” Joe murmured, the expression on his face turned into something serious. “Whether that’s in our past lives or in the future lives, I know no matter what the situation was, my heart will always lead back to you.”

You smiled, stopping on your feet for a moment and leaned in to kiss him softly. “80,000 lifetimes.” You grinned. “That’s a lot.”

“Yeah.” Joe grinned.

“I believe it too.” You replied. “I always have.”

“I love you so much.” Joe whispered.

“I love you too.”

You grinned as he leaned down to kiss you deeply. You smiled through the kiss as he pulled you close to him, wrapping your arms around his neck. Whether that was an invisible red string that connected you and Joe together or because you two have 80,000 layers of In-Yun in over 80,000 lifetimes, you knew that your path always had led back to his heart too. Pulling away from the kiss, Joe set his forehead on yours as you both continued to slow dance blissfully in the middle of your kitchen.

“Your past and mine are parallel lines. Stars all aligned and they intertwined.” -Taylor Swift, All of the Girls You Loved Before

The End.

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Taglist:

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#Joseph Quinn #Joe Quinn #Joseph Quinn x Reader #Joe Quinn x Reader #Joseph Quinn x You #Joe Quinn x You #Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader #Joe Quinn x Fem!Reader #Joseph Quinn Fanfics #Joe Quinn Fanfics #Joseph Quinn Fics #Joe Quinn Fics #Joseph Quinn rpf #Joe Quinn rpf #written in the stars #epilogue #moondustpugh

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haeflmz · 9 months

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The Sin Eater.

Title: The Professor Is Weird.

Pairing: mark lee x fem!oc.

Genre: Horror occult, romance, fantasy, age-gap, slow burn, non-idol au, angst, fluff.

Summary: where an unexpected curse takes over baekhwa private school, jeong haelim gets involved into the world of occult.

Warnings: jumpscares, suicides, gore mention, hallucinations, mental health problems are spoken here, stress and strong language used.

Baekhwa institution. Private all girl school where students only care about one thing; grades. In this world of books and cramming for exam seasons it is nothing but overwhelming competition and criticism. Crippling at the young generation. Teachers putting high standards and expectations onto students. Only the most important people in society enrol their children to this private school.

South Korea’s most popular and successful institution able to only breed the most talented minds.

At least that’s what people outside the school think. Haelim has always felt trapped in this world they call ‘greatness’. There is nothing great about it. Don’t you think it’s ridiculous to be born into this world just to work a nine to five job in ten years time?

She wonders if there was another world out there, a world where routine doesn’t exist. A world where this cage wasn’t forbidding her from being her own person.

“Haelim mind getting the biology books from E21 classroom?”

No physical response from the young girl seated in the wooden oak chair with the hair tied up in a ponytail. Bangs covering the gentle fluffiness of her eyebrows while her dreamy eyes stare out the school window, finding the clouds to be more interesting itself than the book on the desk.

“Haelim!”

The girl’s voice brought her out of the dream-like state only to look back. She fixed her round glasses when the sight of a taller girl, long raven black hair and grey shaped eyes staring at her.

A sigh escapes from her lips. “You’re day dreaming again? Haelim what did I say about you doing that.” Kyujin clearly wasn’t happy knowing that the girl was ignoring everything around them.

She dismissed the scolding, her face turns to the girl once again once the glasses were fixed on the face.

“Sorry. What did you need?” She asked and earned a hand point to the chalk board in front of the classroom.

It showed in bold writing on it: ‘Bring biology books from E21.’ Written by the teacher that wasn’t in today due to an illness they were run down with.

Kyujin then saw the expression on Haelim’s face come to a realisation and without a single thought she stood up.

“I’ll get it.”

“Be quick with it, some of us have grades to prove!”

Coming down the hallways Haelim reaches the door knob opening the door to a very dark classroom. Searching for the light switch quickly, Haelim soon could see everything in the empty space.

The desks were all neatly set up. Chairs were on top of the desks, the teacher’s place was all clean and empty.

The background in the classroom was what Haelim needed. She walks over to the very back to find the biology books all piled up. The dust on them was obvious to the human eye.

Haelim lifts one biology book dusting it. “Ugh… dust.” She shakes it off one by one from each book until…

A loud thud from outside brought her attention. Following outside the classroom, many students started to pile around in circles.

The teachers rushing down the hallways in panic while some girls were starting to scream. Haelim was in panic wondering what was going on?

The whole school came over to witness one thing; a pool of blood sieving on the ground running the school courtyard to go red. Cries overheard with the overlapping of students recording. Haelim was shocked standing on the second floor looking over to the courtyard with everyone else.

From all four floors each student was seemingly looking down at the dead girl that fell from the high railings, down into the courtyard, squished by the concrete floor.

“Oh my god…” Haelim was shaken up holding her palms over her mouth.

The many teachers rushed over to identify the body. From the high view no one could really tell who it was…

The teacher turns the body around, the blood spilling was nearly as big as a puddle. The horrifying young dead girl on the floor looks unrecognisable from what everyone remembers.

“It’s upperclassman Joy!” Eunchae gasps crying.

Haelim’s eyes widen when a sign of a star crossed over with blood imprinted on the corpses’ hand.

Something wasn’t right about these reoccurring events…

The teachers dealt with another suicide event at their school. It only started two months ago. Another death after another which leaves the students becoming infected with fear.

Haelim wasn’t convinced that this was just a coincidence however.

In deep thought Haelim completed ignored her two friends; Chaehyun and Seoyoung.

They were discussing the suicide of Park Sooyoung — also mostly known as Joy amongst other students. It was unfortunate.

It didn’t even make sense? All the top students are disappearing one by one. Joy was a bright student, she was the most happiest person Haelim has ever saw. The most positive that is.

There was no way she had a reason to end her own life. Haelim was certain the previous suicides of the girls were the same.

“Is she day dreaming again?” Sighs Seoyoung while watching their friend in deep thoughts to the point of dissociation.

The blonde girl, Chaehyun, brushes the behaviour off. Haelim has always been a hidden reserved person who doesn’t even let a single person in that head full of thoughts. “The police are closing the case off as suicide again.”

Haelim breaks out of the haze, looking to Chaehyun. “Again? Isn’t that a bit strange that these reoccurring deaths keep happening in this school.”

The two girls shrug. Seoyoung goes back on her phone with a frown. “The teachers don’t want Baekhwa to get bad reviews and ratings.” Of course, it’s all about money at the end of the day.

It was selfish, the poor parents must be grieving the loss of their child and the police refuse to investigate.

Chaehyun saw Haelim’s upset and disapproved face, it was written on it that this was upsetting her a lot more than others. “Hey don’t get too worked up over something that happened. Joy was a stressed senior going through harsh exams, it was most likely because of that.”

“Still…” Haelim quietly turned around sighing. “Okay you’re right.” Giving into her friend she didn’t bother saying much else.

Getting up from the chair Haelim would go to the exit leaving the classroom, Seoyoung and Chaehyun give each other glances back shrugging off. They didn’t bother to ask where their friend was going because they know Haelim is in her own little world.

As usual, Haelim was the one left overthinking this situation. Heading out for a small walk to clear her head before any of the classes resume. She happens to catch a figure suspiciously entering a classroom. Raising an eyebrow, the figure was tall and slender. Black hair fluffed out with round glasses and loose casual clothes.

It doesn’t look like anyone Haelim saw around the school before. Following the same classroom entering it.

The sight of the man searching the desks underneath. Haelim stood there with a determined gaze.

“What are you doing?” Sternly calling out, the man lifts his back around to look at the young girl who was standing in front.

Haelim takes a step forward when the man was quiet. Clearly he was searching for something, and that something he didn’t find because his face was readable. He looks like he got caught red-handed.

“Who are you? I have never seen you around before.” Haelim tilts her head.

He stammers. “I— uh… uh…”

“Are you a pervert?” Haelim assumed. He looked a little weird, like he was doing something inappropriate.

She checks under the desk for any cameras. Previously in the school there was camera footage and many girls were recorded under the desk without notice.

Quickly at the assumption he flinched. “No! I’m not anything like that.”

“Oh yeah? That’s what they all say!”

“jeong haelim?” The voice coming through was an elderly woman. The man and Haelim break their eye contact to look back at the teacher going in the classroom.

“Oh miss song.” Haelim said back in confusion. The teacher looks back at the man. “Mr Mark? What are you doing here.”

Mark was quickly flustered and he gently laughs it off by rubbing the back of his neck.

He clears his voice. “I must’ve got lost in the wrong classroom, Miss Song.”

Haelim didn’t understand, was this guy not a pervert who got into the school by chance? She felt awful and embarrassed for assuming that the new enrolled teacher was a pervert. She even accused him of it too…

Haelim saw him turning to her with a smile. “Nice to meet you Haelim.” She awkwardly nods her head with no words.

Mark walks out with the box of his teaching things following Miss Song out of the classroom. Haelim’s widen eyes were full of surprise as she watched him leave.

‘dammit jeong haelim what a way to make a first impression on your new teacher…’

@haeflmz 2023 ©️ everything belongs to me.

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linkspooky · 2 years

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Jujutsu Kaisen, Chapter 201 Thoughts.

It’s highly ironic the last two chapters are Kenjaku in Geto’s body, making some of Geto’s worst fears come to life. Geto always warned that normal people could use sheer numbers to exploite and harm sorcerers. . While Geto’s methodology was entirely in the wrong (murder is bad) people perhaps his fear of the masses who can’t use jujutsu turning against the few who can use jujutsu are not as unfounded as they once seemed.

When Geto says that the weak oppress the strong with their superior numbers, what does he mean?

1. Exorcise. Consume. For whom?

It’s sort of hard to go “Hmm, maybe Geto had a point” because his way of making that point was mass murder, but I think a lot of people understand what the points that Geto was trying to make are. His methodology is godawful, but both his criticisms for the jujutsu world and his fears aren’t completely unfounded.

Geto’s believes are founded in a fear of the “weak” repressing the “strong”, where the “weak” are those outside the Jujutsu World, common, ordinary every day citizens, while the “strong” are individual Jujutsu Sorcerers.

The first and visceral response to this idea is obviously, sorcerers are not oppressed. There’s an idea in literature criticism called the X-Men Fallacy. The X-Men Fallacy comes from the X-Men comics, and it’s a caution against using people with superpowers oppressed by their society as a metaphor for oppressed minorities in real life, because it is essentially legitimizing that oppression by giving a reason for it. If people really could shoot laser beams out of their eyeballs, it would make sense people would be cautious of that because it represents a legitimate danger. There’s no legitimate danger of say, a gay person, any violence or oppression against them is senseless.

Sorcerers don’t work as a 1:1 metaphor for real world oppression of minority groups, but I don’t think that is exactly what Gege is going for. As a group of people Sorcerers are not opppressed by any government structure, there’s no laws against them, etc. etc. (True the americans are targetting them now but I’ll get to that). However, Sorcerers en masse are exploited.

What do I mean by exploited as opposed to oppressed? In order to prevent the deaths by curses, Jujutsu Sorcerers are expected to fight Curses basically around the clock. Not only do they risk their lives on exorcism missions on a daily basis, they are raised to do this since children. The Jujutsu world is also incredibly insular, Sorcerers rarely have much of a life outside of their duty of exercising curses. There are some people like say certain members of the Zenin clan, (Mai and Maki) who are not even allowed to have a glimpse of a normal life because they are raised with the expectation to be sorcerers so there is no alternative path out of it.

This works much better as a real world comparison, after all there are plenty of people who work dangerous jobs and are exploited for their labor, and society requires people to do that job for the whole of society to function. This is also imagery we are shown multiple times in the manga itself, sorcerers are referred to as cogs in a wheel, people doing a job eliminating curses so the majority of society can function. Megumi calls Jujutsu sorcerers a cog, Nanami calls Sorcery a “Shit Job” like his nine to five finance job albeit one that helps more people, Yuji calls himself only a cog in the machine that exercises curses.

This is also something about sorcerer society that is something generally accepted and taken as unchangeable, sorcerers will continue to die fighting curses for the “greater good of all of society. Needs of the many, etc.

Geto’s main criticism of Sorcerer Society is questioning that exploitation. Why should sorcerers have to continually die, especially in service of an ignorant majority that does not know that sorcerers are fighting these battles for them in the first place?

Its a legitimate criticism, one that is distorted later on by Geto’s own feelings of sorcerer supremacy. However, Geto’s ideals are pretty clear in the Hidden Inventory arc. He starts out believing similar to both Megumi, Nanami, Yuji, that this is the way things are, sorcerers have to use their abilities to protect the weaker common people from curses. They are obligated to use their great powers in service of others.

There’s nothing wrong with that ideal or sense of resposnibility per se, it just doesn’t measure up to the reality that Geto faces. First, that idea is rooted in the idea of sacrifice for the greater good. Utilitarianism etc. The strong should keep the weak in check, Jujutsu Sorcerers should be used to help the greatest amount of people possible. The problem with utilitarianism is how alluring it sounds. It makes sense to sacrifice the few for the many, because that’s numbers right, until you are one of the few who is sacrificed.

One of the greatest critiques of utilitarianism ideology is as follows, “What do you quantify as an acceptable sacrifice for the greater good?” It’s a question with no real answer because people will argue how much is worth sacrificing over a perceived gain, and who should be doing the sacrificing.

To name another example, have you heard of the Prisoner’s Dilemna?

The prisoner’s dilemma presents a situation where two parties, separated and unable to communicate, must each choose between cooperating with the other or not. The highest reward for each party occurs when both parties choose to co-operate. [SOURCE]

However, the rub is both robgbers can minimize the total jail time that the two of them will do if only they co-operate and stay silent, but they are offered incentives to betray each other that they are faced seperately, which will drive them to defect and end up doing maximum total jail time between the two of hem six years total.

Another example of the Prisoner’s dilemma is known as the Tragedy of the Commons:

It may be to everyone’s collective advantage to conserve and reinvest in the propagation of a common pool of natural resources in order to be able to continue consuming it, but each individual always has an incentive to instead consume as much as possible as quickly as possible, which then depletes the resource. Finding some way to co-operate would clearly make everyone better off here.

In other words both of these principles show that even in situations where it makes sense logically for people to cooperate for a common good and it would lead to the best result, people will instead act for individual good instead, because humans don’t behave rationally.

Geto’s ideals that make sense, are then confronted with the senselessness of human behavior. He’s challenged in two ways in the Hidden Inventory arc. First, when He and Gojo are asked to sacrifice a girl for the common good, Jujutsu Society whose ideal is to protect the weak are essentially asking Geto and Gojo to kill a teenage girl as a sacrifice for the sake of the many.

This is the first time Geto’s ideals don’t hold up to the reality of his job, because he cannot protect the weak individual (Riko) and protect the weak collective (jujutsu world and outside) at the same time. A strict utilitarian would say Geto should accept his mission, and sacrifice Riko for the common good. However, Geto’s ideals don’t lie in utitilarianism, they lie in the fact that Sorcerers are obligated to use their powers to protect the weak.

So, Geto is asked to do reconcile these two very different ideas. His own ideals on how the ewak should be protected by strong people like him and Gojo. And Sorcerer Society which asks Sorcerers to fight curses and make sacrifices en masse in order to protect the weak. Sacrificing Riko is in allignment with Sorcerer Society’s ideals, but against Geto’s personal ideals. HOWEVER. Geto doesn’t realize this yet, and he attempts to reconcile them. He attempts to have both at once, continue with his duty as a sorcerer, and also protect Riko. His logic being that him and Gojo should simply be strong enough to do both.

And of course they’re both wrong, because no individual on their own is stronger than society. In the context of the fight, despite caliming they are the strongest, both Gojo and Geto working together were not enough to protect Riko in time even if Gojo did kill Toji by the end of the fight.

This is the first time that Geto’s high ideals come crashing down in reality. There are two things he believes in, because the strong protect the weak he will be able to protect people like Riko in front of him when he chooses too. Geto can’t live up to that paradigm he puts on himself when he fails to protect her, he has failed in his perceived duty.

The second is Geto’s belief that the sacrifices sorcerers make for the greater society have a purpose, that they fight to protect the greater majority of people and therefore for that goal any sacrifice is worth it. Which once again, returning to utilitarianism, sacrificing for the greater good is something that seems to make logical sense until you’re the one asked to make the sacrifice.

Geto never abandons his idea of the strong protecting the weak. That people who have power should fight for those who don’t have power. Rather, his idea of who weak people are changes because of what he witnesses.

Geto sees a little girl murdered, because a cult of rich and powerful people paid for Toji to do it. He’s met with the seneslessnes of the violence. A little girl isn’t even sacrificed for the greater good of stopping the danger of Master Tengen’s evolution, she’s sacrificed because a bunch of sick people with the money to do so killed a little girl for their demented religious beliefs and then applauded their deaths. Jujutsu Sorcerers have strength in the sense that they can shoot laser beams, but they don’t have traditional societal power, they don’t have money or influence, they are in all aspects a fringe group on the edge of society most people don’t even know about.

At the beginning of the arc Geto says, that the Star religious group are the ones that they don’t need to worry about because they’re not curse users. Only to have it turn out to be them as the ones directly repsonsible for her death, yes Toji killed her, but only because the Star Group paid her too. They used money and societal power, the power of the majority, something Jujutsu Sorcerers don’t have.

This prompts Geto to ask himself the question, who is really the weak one in this situation? Who is it that he should truly be protecting?

Geto talks about “reason” because he assumes the world to be rational. Jujutsu Sorcerers assume society runs like a machine that works, when it truly doesn’t. In Geto’s mind, his actions of exorcising curses, should achieve the greater perceivable benefit of a better, safer society. However, instead what Geto witnesses is the opposite. Sorcerers work themselves to the bone exercising curses, only for the situation not to improve at all. “Exorcisms and consumption” especially relates to ideas of laborers as an exploited people in the greater scope of capitalism. Say you’re a factory worker making a product that essentially nobody needs, but is sold anyway, because captialism is desired around a model of endless consumption, people make things, because people buy things. People need to constantly buy things to keep money flowing. However, if you are factory worker A, even if you get paid for your labor, it’s difficult to see your work as amounting to anything if all you do is make a cheap product no one needs. Of course in this case Geto is presented with what seems like a sacred duty, slaying monsters to protect the innocent people.

Yet in reality, sorcerer’s live extremely short lives, young sorcerers die in hideous and gruesome deaths all the time, and while less people die on a grand scale it’s also true that sorcerers are dying left and right and yet the number of curses made in the world doesn’t decrease. Yuki Tsukumo’s point is that the current system of exercising curses one by one is unsustainable. Geto’s point is that sorcerers will continue to die, and they’re even expected to always make this sacrifice, over, over, over, over, over, over, over, over, over.

Geto’s snapping point is also, him witnessing again a year later the same thing he witnessed with Riko’s death. Not only is the extreme labor that sorcerers are expected to perform for an unknowing population a violence already performed against sorceers. There are also other ways sorcerers are exposed to violence. Even if sorcerers are individually strong, they are one outnumbered by normal people who can band up together to do violence against them, the way the town of people forms a mob to cage these two little girls based on superstition, and two sorcerers have no real money or political power.

Mass Murder was Geto’s method. It was the way Geto saw to achieve his ideals. Geto’s ideal is a world where Sorcerers don’t die over and over again exercising curses. A world where this status quo of senseless death and exploitation changes. And yes, sorcerers are exploited at least for their labors.

They are a fringe group, they have very little say in their lives, they’re expected tow ork and devote their entire lives to that work, and it’s incredibly dangerous and deadly work, even young sorcerers are expected to risk their lives. Geto’s not wrong in the fact that it’s unjust to build an entire society on the sacrifice on these countless nameless sorcerers. And even as Geto’s methods become more murdererous, this idea at the center of his actions is that it’s unfair that sorcerers be expected to make this sacrifice over and over again. Sorcerers are in fact mistreated by society at large, despite the fact that they are indivdually strong (they can shoot laser beams) they are also expected to labor hard all of their lives which usually lead to short lives. It’s like, everyone agrees child labor is bad right, and yet for society to currently function as it does people Yuta’s age are asked to continually go on missions where they may die.

Geto’s disillusionment just causes him to mistake belive the only response to a society where sorcerers are relatively powerless and stuck with their lot in life is “sorcerer supermacy” that is, to retool society where sorcerers rule. THis is also where Geto falls victim to the same trappings of sorcerer society he pretends to be above. Sorcerer society runs on might makes right. Sorcerers believe that stronger sorcerers are better, stronger sorcery techniques are better, everything is run on individual strength. Geto’s replacing one world where individualism reigns for another, because despite being a radical and seeing clearly there is a problem here he can’t escape the box society has trapped him in. He even uses a might make right methodology. Well, clearly, if the problem is that regular humans who can’t use sorcerer have us outnumbered ten to one, then we should just kill them all, the stronger, better people will rule.

Ignoring the obvious flaw in Geto’s plan that sorcerers are constantly infighting, and sorcerer politics is incredibly conservative and cutthroat Besides the obvious “murder is bad”, Geto seems to ignore the fact that if sorcerers were left as the only ones running the show, all the problems of sorcerer society would still be there and they would still be constantly killing each other over infighting.

Anyway, my long dive into explaining Geto’s ideals and his critiques of how sorcerer society is ran is eventually leading to this, Geto’s fears that sorcerers may be exploited by the majority are literally coming true as of Kenjaku’s actions.

Once again this works better as a labor exploitation metaphor, then a minority one. Kenjaku is propopsing that sorcerers can be used, not just as labor to exercise curses, but also as a literal resource.

The trappings of utilitarianism, what seems to make sense as a sacrifice for the greater good of society, in this case a small sacrifice to create a clean and renewable energy that will solve the energy crisis, seems reasonable until you are the one expected to make the sacrifice.

Kenjaku even references the tragedy of the commons here. The president is against abduction and human experimentation UNTIL his advisors mention that other countries might want to abduct and experiment on the sorcerers instead. THe common sense solution is that no one experiments on sorcerers. However, when it’s possible that someone else might do it instead, and they might get this resource that we do not have, and therefore put them at advantage over us THEN WE HAVE TO HAVE IT INSTEAD. Tragedy of the commons play out in real time. The logical solution is for no one to conduct experiments and everyone reaps the benefits, the most appealing solution is ONLY WE GET THE BENEFITS.

This is also Geto’s fear playing out in action, that people outside of the Jujutsu World can use numbers, and resources such as money and political pull that Jujutsu Sorcerers do not have in order to move against Jujutsu Sorcerers. I think Gege uses the word “Minority” with tact here, they’re not an oppressed minority because there is societal oppresion against them, but rather beause they make up a minority of society, beucase they are in small numbers and have no political pull it would be incredibly easy for the president of america to just, send a number of soldiers against them. The small size of the Sorcerer Community makes them vulnerable and unable to protect themselves if and when others on the outside decide to gang up on them in larger numbers.

Once again, the American's actions aren’t to like, oppress the sorcerers but rather to use them as an exploitable resource. They are already being exploited to exorcise curses, but now the political powers all around the world may do something as inhumane as kidnap them and experiment on them, for some perceived benefit of cleaner energy, or whatever, and they can get away with this because they have the power to do so.

Geto’s fear revolved around the ideas that this might happen, especially after witnessing it happen twice, an entire small town beating on two little girls and locking them in cages, an incredibly rich cult paying for the deaths of a fifteen year old girl. The majority can find reasons to justify violence against sorcerers, and sorcerers because of their small numbers cannot really defend themselves against that violence. That was always a risk, and now we are seeing it play out in real time. So, let the sorcerer hunt begin.

#geto suguru #jjk 201 #jjk meta #jujutsu kaisen 201 #jujutsu kaisen spoilers #jujutsu kaisen 201 spoilers #jjk spoilers #suguru geto #satoru gojo #kenjaku #noritoshi kamo

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stardewstardropthoughts · 1 year

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i dont know if this will be odd but i hope its understandable! could i request if the bachelorettes found out their wife has gotten pregnant, maybe after tries w artificial insemination? i dont know if it makes sense feel free to ignore and i know you kostly do for bachelors ><

I love the bachelorettes I just feel like I do a bad job writing for them 🥲 I will try though! Also I’m so excited for when Julie and cam update us on the numbers today pls someone understand who I’m talking about because these TikTok lesbians deserve the world, lemme know if y’all want the labour and birth!

Abigail:

She’s always wanted kids but she’s never wanted to be pregnant so when you guys decide to do artificial insemination she’s so excited

Never misses a single appointment, by your side the whole time, helps with all the shots to make sure your eggs are mature

When you guys finally get a positive pregnancy test after three failed rounds she’s so excited, sobbing happy tears

She’s holding your hair back when you puke, getting all your cravings for you, rubbing your back

Hope you don’t wanna go mining for the next nine months, or do much strenuous work at all

All but takes over the really hard farm work, she doesn’t want you to push yourself to hard

Has a whole nursery theme picked out already, loves buying baby clothes and toys and books

She’s so excited to have a little family with you 💜

Emily:

She’s thrilled when you bring up starting a family, she loves kids and would love to have her own

After lots of discussion and saving up making sure the farm has steady income you come to the conclusion that you would carry your first child and she would carry your second

Y’all get really lucky and only have to go through one round before you get pregnant, she’s there every step of the way to support you

She gets a little nervous about all the needles you have to take but she helps you with them regardless

Loves cooking healthy meals for you while your pregnant

Sews you some very cute maternity clothes, absolutely cry’s a little while she does because that’s her baby in your tummy!!

Lots of purples and blues in your baby’s wardrobe, tons of stuffed animals in a cute gem theme toybox

She’s always got a hand on your bump when your snuggling so she can feel the movements

Haley:

Similar to Abigail she’s always wanted at-least one kid but does not want to be pregnant, labour does not appeal to her

She’s thrilled when you tell her you want to carry the baby though

It takes two rounds for y’all to get pregnant, she’s thrilled to see those two lines on that test

Holding out her actual excitement until you get the blood test done at Harvey’s clinic though

Try’s not to cry when it’s confirmed that your pregnant but literally can’t help it, she’s emotional

Constantly taking pictures of you throughout, wants to make a photo album of how beautiful you look while carrying her child

Holds your hair back for you when you puke, comforts you when you get sad that none of your clothes fit anymore

“Awe sweetheart your carrying our child, your growing a whole life, that’s more then worth your jeans not fitting right. Your still as beautiful as ever and we’ll get you some real cute maternity wear”

Holds true to that promise, she loves shopping and absolutely loved buying a whole new wardrobe for her lovely wife (and so many baby clothes as well, cannot stop herself Theyer just so tiny and cute)

Loves feeling the baby move, cries at basically every appointment because you get to hear the heartbeat

Has the ultrasound images on the fridge and in her little photo album

Leah:

She’s probably the one who brought up the idea of having children

You both want to be pregnant at some point so you decide you’ll go first and then a year later she’ll have the second child

It took a while to get pregnant for y’all, around five rounds total, she’s been your rock just has you have been hers throughout

So excited and then extremely nervous

Constantly hovering, making sure your not overdoing it on the farm, making sure your eating proper meals and good nutritional food

Will one hundred percent go out at three am in search of that one limited edition berry flavour ice cream you woke up and decided you absolutely needed

Loves baby shopping with you, probably has way to many onesies put in the cart, along with toys

Will make little teddy bear carvings to put on the bookshelves in your baby’s bedroom

Loves being the big spoon at night so she can wrap her arms around your growing tummy and cradle both you and your unborn child

Maru:

Knows so much about pregnancy and ivf or insemination

Does not want to be pregnant but is thrilled that you want to be

Another lucky situation where you only had to go through one round before you became pregnant

Tells you all the fun facts about pregnancy that you may not know and may not want to know

Holds your hair back for you and puts a cold cloth against your forehead when you having morning sickness

Constantly going to the saloon to get whatever meal your craving from there

Tells you all the fun facts about baby’s growth week to week

Has one of those pregnancy Calendars that tells you things like “week 15 baby is the size of a cabbage”

She also doesn’t let you overdo it on the farm, lots of little breaks through the day

Constantly asking Harvey about what she can do to be more supportive

Asks her mom for advice as well, probably buys you the biggest pregnancy pillow she can find

Penny:

She loves kids, and she loves teaching them too as seen with jas and Vincent so she’s thrilled when you tell her you want to start a family with her

You guys decide you’ll carry the baby and after a few rounds you fall pregnant

She’s very excited but also very nervous, she’s never really had a good example for a parent

She asks robin and Jody a lot of questions about being a parent

Does her best to support you while your pregnant, she feels bad every time you throw up, rubs your back soothingly and helps you wash your face and brush your teeth after

Tried to cook once but almost set the kitchen on fire so quickly gave that up, you teach her a few simple meals (that are mostly cold dishes)

Loves to shop for the baby, being finally financially stable she doesn’t feel as bad spending a bit extra on the tiny human your growing

Also goes to the saloon to pick up whatever your craving

Has a lot of anxiety about weather or not she’ll be a good mom but you assure her you wouldn’t want a baby with anyone else

Jas and Vincent are honorary big siblings to this tiny human and are very excited for when the baby is born, Vincent asked you to name the baby after him and was very sad when you very politely declined

Sonogram pictures are all over the fridge, she loves looking at them

Panics when you start crying for no reason, pregnancy hormones are a bitch

Asks Harvey so many questions but he’s very patient and will listen and explain as much as he can

She sobbed the first time she felt the baby move

You also sobbed

#stardew fanfic #stardew valley #stardew farmer #stardew x reader #stardew headcanon #stardew marriage #stardew bachelorettes #stardew abigail #stardew maru #stardew haley #stardew emily #stardew penny #stardew leah #I love them so much #pls I’m so bi

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watanabes-cum-dump · 11 months

Text

Big Brother

Synopsis: Lee reflects on his experience as an older brother, both to Murray and the Gray Ravens.

Note: Basically Gray Raven found family + Murray.

AO3 link

I am five when my brother is born.

He’s so small, so fragile, and so loud. But I want to protect him, because mother loves him, and I will too. I will be good for her, and good for him. Father is nowhere to be found, but it’s alright. Me and my brother can be the men in mom’s life.

I am six when he starts to walk, Murray stumbles around grasping at toys with his chubby little hands. He can’t go to school yet, so I still walk alone, but he will join me in a few years. He loves the little robot I made out of pipe cleaners and cardboard, he loves it more than the stuffed cat mom bought for him. She laughs, saying that maybe she should just keep the cat.

Next thing I know, I was nine and my mother is dead. The Punishing virus, of course.

I don’t cry when they burn her body. Because I have to take care of my brother now. Murray can cry because I will comfort him, I will dry his tears. If I cry, who will dry my tears?

It’s not that bad when mom dies. A children’s home takes us in. We still have a roof over our heads, and I can still take care of Murray. He’s alright, making his own toys out of pipe cleaners and cardboard. I’m alright too, because I started to learn about robotics. I’m going to make the best robot for him, so that he’ll always have a friend.

I am ten when Murray is diagnosed with a heart condition. He’s more fragile than ever, launching into coughing fits whenever he exerts himself too much. The medicine is expensive, I dry up mother’s savings to pay for it. I feel bad, because mother said that we could use it to get a bigger place and get better food. But I don’t mind the children’s home, I didn’t mind out tiny apartment either. Not when Murray is with me.

I am twelve when I realise just how much I miss mom. I miss her voice, her touch. I don’t want to have to take care of Murray all the time. Why should I raise him when I’m just a kid? I have school, I want to have friends to hang out with but I have a younger brother who’s always sick. He’s a burden, but one that I am willing to shoulder.

I am still twelve when I get my first job. The pay is low but the old lady running the shop is nice anyways. She gets it, she wants to help me. Her mom died too when she was young, she knows what it’s like. I am too young to work, but the Punishing virus has left the world broken beyond repair. Age just determines your value in the workforce now.

I am thirteen when I forget my mother’s face. I’ve seen so many come in and out of the shop, in and out of the children’s home. Only Murray’s face stays with me. He looks like me but not really. His eyes are bigger, and his lip are thinner. But anyone could tell we were brothers. Morian who is thin but tall with blond hair and blue eyes, and Murray, who is also rather tall for his age with the same hair and eyes as me.

Someone once told me I look like my mother. I am not sure, I don’t remember her.

I am sixteen when me and Murray move out of the children’s home. It’s a small apartment, just like the one I grew up in, but it’s not that same. It’s a shoddy studio with a leaky kitchen sink and the bathroom door doesn’t close all the way. But we make it home. I hang some posters up, and once the bed is messed up and the blinds are crooked, it’s our new home.

I am seventeen when I start doing mercenary work. It’s dangerous, but it pays well enough that maybe I can finally pay for Murray’s heart surgery. I found I’m quite a good shot, though I wish I could just tinker with little robots all day. I don’t like the job, but eventually, I don’t feel anything about it. It’s a means of survival, in this world where death’s shadow never truly leaves, it’s all I can do.

I am not Morian when I work, when I work I am Lee. A blue demon with two pistols and sharp eyes. Lee is cold and efficient, Morian is a warm older brother. Lee is a lone wolf, Morian is always with his family. I think that way I never felt all that bad about the job. Separating myself from Lee made me feel lighter, as if I was just a normal boy. As normal as a boy could be in a post apocalyptic world I suppose.

I am eighteen when I find a way to save Murray. This is it, this is all I’ve ever wanted. A ticket to Babylonia, a ticket to safety and security, and all I have to do is give up my body to Kurono.

So I do.

My heart goes to Murray, finally he has his heart surgery. The rest of my body goes to the wastes. Am I still Morian? Or am I just Lee now? Can Lee be human? I wasn’t sure, it made me uneasy for a while. The idea that I was only Lee now, that I was only the soldier. I could never go back to being an older brother, I could never go back to that little apartment, and I could never remember my mother.

I never turn nineteen.

I am eighteen forever. I am an adult technically but I never really feel like one.

Murray turns nineteen.

Then he turns twenty.

I am younger than my little brother now.

But I still love him the same. I still ask him how he is, I still tease him occasionally and I watch him grow. It’s scary to think that now, there is a possibility that I will be alive when he is not. Or that I could die and leave him alone. That’s what scares me the most, so I try to come back from my missions alive.

I do a bit of a double take when he calls me Morian. He knows I’ve been going by Lee but, to him I’m still Morian. His older brother. I do not know if Morian is still alive, truthfully. Have I replaced him? Is it just Lee now?

Eventually, I left Kurono and joined Babylonia’s task force. My new teammates are Lucia, a veteran soldier who still has the charm of a teenage girl, and Liv, a sweet young medic. They’re both younger than me, which was a bit jarring at first. Liv is sixteen, what has she already seen? And Lucia, how long has she been a construct? Where is her family?

Our leader, the commandant, is an accomplished one. The valedictorian of their class at Faust military academy, and an ace shot. I think they’re just as good as me. The Gray Ravens become my new home in no time.

I would never turn down Liv’s request to help her in her training, and I remain… supportive, of Lucia’s attempts at cooking. They’ve become dear to me, and even the commandant stays close. I know most commandants don’t usually get this close or even think of the constructs in their squads as human, but they do. And it makes me feel like Morian again.

Eventually, I realise that Lee and Morian are one in the same. Sometimes Morian is violent and cold, and sometimes, Lee is soft and welcoming.

HQ is nothing like that rundown apartment, the couch is soft in the commons, and the sink works just fine. There are no blinds to speak of, the sky remains starry at all times of the day. It is always well lit, and it’s always the right temperature. I even have a place to make whatever contraptions my heart desires, and I have the means to repair my clothes.

It’s not that rundown apartment, but it has the same feeling. It feels like home.

Home is wherever my family is. Yes, Gray Raven is my family. I am the oldest, I will dry their tears and help them anyway I can. I am the Gray Ravens older brother, and I have two younger sisters who will never cry, never feel hopeless because I am here for them.

Soon enough, I realise that they will dry my tears too. They will help me, they will take care of me. Because that’s what family does.

I am still eighteen, despite the years that have passed since my reconstruction surgery. But in my mind, I am still a kid. I still get pouty and commandant pokes fun at me for it. I will never truly grow up, I will be stuck in this limbo forever and I will only become even younger than Murray.

I know he works for Kurono now. I know he’s doing shady things, just as I did for him once. I don’t care, I still love him. Because I know he would still love me in spite of the dirt I’ve trudged through. We are both brothers and sinners.

I think he could be a commandant in all honesty, but I think he’s still a little fragile for it. No matter, he makes good money in Kurono, and we even get to hang out sometimes. It should be the other way around, I should be treating my little brother to cool exhibits and arcades. In another timeline, maybe I am.

In another timeline, maybe Lucia, Liv and the commandant are friends from school. In that timeline, maybe mom is still alive and me and Murray can play video games and build little robots together. Maybe dad is there, whoever he is.

In that timeline and in this one, I am their older brother.

I am still eighteen, I always will be. Whether I am the Palefire or the Entropy, I remain eighteen forever, and I remain their big brother.

#Punishing gray raven #pgr #Pgr lee #Pgr lucia #pgr liv #pgr fanfic #PGR Murray #Gray Ravens #Now time to write smut now that I’ve gotten all the feelsies out :D

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hederasgarden · 2 years

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Mistakes Were Made - Part 1

Summary: When you take the job as Bruce Wayne’s publicist, you’re prepared for some surprises but finding out he’s Batman isn’t one of them. The good news is you’re not fired. The bad news? Batman definitely needs some PR help.

Pairing: Bruce Wayne (The Batman) x F!Reader

Rating: Gen. Humor with a brief scene with threatened violence. Future chapters will include mature themes.

Word Count: 1.6K

When you take the job as Bruce Wayne’s publicist, you’re prepared for some weirdness. Your time in LA working for out-of-touch celebrities and eccentric silicon valley types taught you to expect that much. Rich people, regardless of their occupation, weren’t normal. You’ve been screamed at, berated and even had a chair thrown at you once by a very intoxicated B-List celebrity client but still, nothing prepared you for the sheer awkwardness of every interaction with Bruce Wayne.

It’s hard to tell if he’s just painfully shy or actually nonverbal. Alfred does most of the talking when you first arrive at the manor and it’s apparent this wasn’t Bruce’s idea. Or if it is, he’s strongly regretting it. But you power through, talking enough for the both of you. The first time he does speak, it's a simple 'no' at your request for him to attend the Halloween-themed fundraiser for a children's charity. He ends up writing a nine-figure check that you yourself deliver and issue a press release about.

You’re slowly learning to navigate the different types of silences and minute changes in his facial expressions to understand what he wants. A lip twitch is a good sign but that little deep furrow that appears in his brow means he has concerns. Awkward silences punctuated by a sigh indicates he’ll go but the worst by far is how he stares at you, not quite making eye contact but fixating on a point just above your shoulder as you ramble through why he needs to attend certain events. Your crowning achievement was the one time he looked you in the eye for a second and grunted.

Now, four months later, he does speak to you… mostly in short, stunted sentences. Today you’re working on getting him onboard with a visit to benefit a children's hospital. It’ll be great press and make the board happy.

“I’ll have a makeup artist on stand by,” you tell Bruce, typing away at your MacBook. “In case you make another visit to your super secret fight club the day before.”

You have no idea what crazy rich person hobby Bruce has that leaves his face scraped up on occasion but you know he can’t attend the Children’s Cancer benefit with a shiner. It’s your own little joke, coming up with new and inventive activities to explain his injuries. Last week you asked how his spelunking adventure went. That earned you a longer stare than usual.

When you glance up Bruce is watching you, head cocked to the side. You fidget under his look but after a tortuous minute the skin around his eyes crinkle and you relax.

“An hour?” He questions.

“Two and you have to do a photo op with the mayor.”

“No photos.”

“An hour and two photos. One with the mayor and another with some kids,” you counter. It’s like arguing about naps and screen times with your nephew except Bruce is infinitely more grumpy.

When Bruce stands and purses his lips you know you’ve won. Internally you give yourself a high five, externally you stare at the computer and wait until you feel the heavy drag of his eyes finally leave you.

“Well done,” Alfred praises, appearing out of the shadows like Batman himself. You flinch and his expression softens in apology. He and Bruce have a habit of appearing seemingly out of nowhere from the endless supply of shadowy nooks in the manor. At least you’ve learned not to yelp. That was embarrassing the first time it happened. The second time you’d thrown your scalding cup of coffee on Bruce. In typical Wayne fashion he didn’t react but did kindly help you up off the floor.

“Honestly I’d have been happy with just 30 minutes and a single photo. But don’t tell him that,” you warn.

“I’m good at keeping secrets,” Alfred assures you. “I was about to set out some afternoon tea. Will you join me?”

“Yes. Will there be little sandwiches?” You ask hopefully.

“Yes, and scones.”

“You’re my favorite person, Alfred,” you praise before setting down your phone to look at him consideringly. “You gonna get mad if I ask for coffee again?”

“The tea will be served in 10 minutes,” Alfred replies.

“Tea it is,” you whisper to yourself.

✥

It’s 9 pm on Friday and you’re exhausted. Not even comfy PJs and a chilled bottle of white wine can wash away the intense week you’ve had. If it weren’t for your standing phone call with your best friend on the west coast you’d have been in bed already. You look forward to these talks. She always patiently listens to you complain about your job and Bruce.

“The man is the walking embodiment of My Chemical Romance in a $10,000 suit,” you tell your friend, phone cradled between your ear and shoulder as you heat up the leftover pasta. “Except he probably doesn’t listen to emo music. Honestly, he probably sits alone in silence,” you continue. Your calico kitty twines between your legs and you scratch behind her ears absently.

“Have you seen Batman yet?” Your friend questions, clearly uninterested in the reclusive billionaire of Gotham.

“No. I’m half convinced he’s some elaborate prank Gotham is playing on the rest of the world. What sane person dresses up like a freaking bat and fights crime?”

“He’s hot though, you gotta admit.”

“Oh yes, the three inches of his face you can see in costume are practically panty-melting.”

“It’s about what you can’t see,” your friend insists suggestively. “Listen, the suit fucks. God, why doesn't LA have a caped crusader?”

“If you want to see a crazy person in a superhero costume you can hit up Disneyland. Or downtown LA.”

“Ugh, the east coast has made you boring,” she laments. "How’s the dating scene there?”

“Wouldn’t know. Bruce Wayne is my full-time job right now.”

“Just promise me you’re going to get out and have some fun. All you did in LA was work. At least download Hinge and give it a try. Sex is a fantastic way to blow off some steam.”

“I’m hanging up now,” you warn your friend.

“You know I’m right,” she singsongs. “Anyway, did I tell you what happened to James?” She questions, launching into some crazy story about her latest date.

Later you’ll blame it on the wine, but after you get off the phone with her you download Hinge and set up a profile. What’s the worst that could happen? You go on a boring date and then delete the app?

✥

As it turns out, a boring date is the least of your problems.

Dinner is uneventful and its own brand of excruciating as you listen to Brad talk about himself and how he's got platinum status on American Airlines -whatever that means. You let him walk you to the subway station, even as he tries to pressure you into letting him give you a ride home. You know what the offer will cost you and you’re not interested in listening to him talk anymore about himself or cryptocurrency.

Brad keeps trying to rest a hand on your lower back and you’re so preoccupied trying to sidestep the touch you don’t realize the two men walking towards you are trouble. They brandish a knife and demand money. You freeze, too surprised to give up your purse but when one of them reaches for it you step back automatically, moving the purse out of his grasp. Your heel catches on the subway grate and you land on your ass hard enough to make you grunt in pain.

“Hand it over, bitch,” he snarls, lunging forward but before he can reach you a black blur appears and suddenly both men are on the floor, groaning. One stands up but gets knocked down immediately. The other tries to stab who you now realize is freaking Batman in the leg. The knife breaks off and Batman kicks him hard in the jaw, knocking him out.

You continue to stare as Gotham’s caped crusader makes quick work tying up both men. He turns towards you, offering his hand. He pulls you up easily and you teeter on your heels, steadying yourself with a hand against his chest. Whatever material his suit is made out of is hard and cold. You rip your hand back embarrassed.

“Are you ok?” He asks gruffly, staring intently at you.

“Peachy,” you reply automatically, almost wanting to laugh at the absurdity of the situation. “I mean, uh, I’m fine.”

“You shouldn’t have tried to fight, you could have gotten hurt,” he chastises.

Maybe it’s the spectacularly bad date or the adrenaline of almost getting robbed but you find yourself stabbing your index finger into his chest plate, more than a little angry. "I'm from LA. I can handle myself," you tell him. “Plus I really like this purse.”

The Batman growls. "Nothing is worth your life." He continues to stare at you, intense and brooding in a way that’s oddly familiar. “Things can be replaced, people can’t.”

There’s something in his voice, a strange undercurrent of emotion so at odds with his demeanor that you feel the fight go right out of you.

"That’s… fair. Um, thank you for your help. I kinda thought maybe you were an urban legend. Like bigfoot or the Loch Ness monster if he wore the smokey eye look,” you continue.

There's a brief twitch of his lip but otherwise no reaction.

"The police are on their way. Stay out of trouble," he warns gruffly before disappearing in a swirl of black fabric.

"Well, that was cool. Met the Batman." You turn to your date only to find him looking wide-eyed and terrified.

He shakes his head and promptly vomits on the concrete. You awkwardly pat him on the back. At least you could tell your friend you met Batman.

✥

Part 2 can be found here.

#bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne x you #bruce wayne x fem!reader #bruce wayne #the batman x reader #the batman x you #the batman fanfic #bruce wayne fanfiction

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magicmarkerz · 5 months

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American Gods novel study under the cut :3

yes, i handed this in for a grade.

five pages of chaos. enjoy!

American Gods – Neil Gaiman

Published by William Morrow (New York, 2001)

Awards: Hugo Award for best novel (2002), Locus Award for best fantasy novel (2002), Nebula Award for best novel (2003), Bram Stoker Award for best novel (2001)

Genres: Fantasy/Horror

Protagonist: Shadow Moon

Aliases: Puppy (by Laura), Mike Ainsel (false name while he lived in Lakeside), Baldur (confirmed in a later novella)

Family: Unnamed Mother, Mr. Wednesday (father), Laura McCabe (wife, deceased, (temporarily reanimated))

Age: 32 (beginning of novel)

Status: Reincarnated (it’s a long story)

Shadow is a tall, imposing black man (he’s a lovely man, don’t let appearances fool you.) who was recently released from prison after his wife’s death. His plan is to return home, where his old job as a personal fitness trainer is waiting for him, but his entire life is thrown into a blender when he meets Mr. Wednesday. All Shadow wants is some semblance of normality, of what his life was like before prison, but alas.

Antagonist 1: The New Gods/The Opposing Side (person vs society, person vs supernatural, person vs technology – the new gods are really confusing.)

The new gods want to eliminate the old gods because they’re afraid of being forgotten, so, by extension, they want to eliminate Shadow, who is working with the old gods.

Old gods will always exist at least a little bit, even as a wisp of energy, because they can’t be forgotten. They’re remembered through stories and tales and carvings and art and everything. They’ll always be around. The new gods, on the other hand, will eventually disappear. They’re created through the ideology that anything you worship or dedicate time to can be turned into a god. If you spend a few minutes making sure your car is in tip-top shape every day, you’re worshipping it. If you do it enough, your car could be the personification of a god. If you spend a little bit too long watching TV, yep, you guessed it. TV is now a god! (Well, her name is Media, but you get the idea.) It’s the same with drugs, with money, with everything.

Antagonist 2: Mr. Wednesday (person vs person, person vs supernatural)

Aliases: Odin, Wednesday, Grimnir/Grimm, Uncle Emmerson Borson (by Shadow when he lived in Lakeside)

Family: Shadow Moon (Son), hundreds of unnamed children (just like Zeus, Mr. Wednesday is a big ol’ whore – your words, not mine.)

Age: It’s complicated.

Status: He has multiple forms but is alive as long as he is remembered at least a little bit. He misses the blood sacrifices, though.

In the beginning of the story, Shadow is wary of Wednesday, but quickly becomes acclimated to him. As the story goes on, Shadow gets closer to Wednesday, even assisting him in various crimes, and mourning his death (spoiler alert!). When Shadow first agreed to work for Wednesday, he was told that in the case of Wednesday dying, Shadow would have to take his vigil. When Wednesday does die, Shadow volunteers to take the vigil, and is tied to the World Tree for nine days and nine nights without food or water.

Antagonist 3: Shadow (person vs self)

Throughout the book, Shadow argues with himself over many things. Whether or not to work for Wednesday, whether or not to rob the bank, whether or not to trust his wife’s reincarnated rotting body’s advice after she cheated on him (it wasn’t her fault, the old gods coerced her into it.), whether or not to take Wednesday’s vigil. It goes on, and on, and on. He always chooses the more stupid and dangerous option, obviously, but it’s always a fight.

Plot Summary

Shadow is released from prison on parole after his wife, Laura, is pronounced dead after a car crash. Shadow is planning to take a plane back to his hometown, but in the seat next to him is a man that gives him the creeps. Shadow doesn’t get back on the plane after they touch down to do a transfer, and instead goes to a bar, where the man from before, Wednesday, is waiting. Wednesday offers Shadow a position as his assistant, and, after some convincing and mead, Shadow agrees. (Trigger event) Wednesday convinces Shadow to partake in various crimes as the war with the new gods approaches, and Shadow willingly follows him. At one point, Shadow lives in a quaint town called Lakeside, and during his residence, a girl goes missing. After a few months, Shadow is arrested for breaking parole and travelling across the USA with Wednesday. Mr. Ibis and Mr. Jacquel come to collect him, and they reveal that Wednesday has been killed by the new gods, and Shadow is to accompany them to collect him body. They collect it, and Shadow volunteers to take Wednesday’s vigil. He dies upon the life tree but is revived soon after by Whiskey Jack (Wisakedjak). Shadow ventures to House on The Rock, where the war is to take place, and finds Laura, who has just stabbed Loki. It’s reavealed that Loki was behind the war, and the war was never supposed to be a war, it was going to be a blood sacrifice to Loki and Wednesday (Odin). (Crisis) Shadow gives a speech to the gods, new and old, and they decide not to fight. Shadow returns to Lakeside, where he realizes the missing girl is in the trunk of an old truck out on the ice, which is a yearly tradition – every year they drive an old klunker out onto the ice and place bets on when it’s going to melt. Shadow opens the trunk and finds the girl, who is long dead, but the ice begins to crack and he goes under. He’s rescued by Hinzelmann, the man who drives the truck out every year. Hinzelmann warms Shadow up and reveals that he is the reincarnation of a dead child god, and every year he kills a child as a sacrafice to himself. (Climax) A young policeman hears the conversation, and shoots Hinzelmann in self defense, but is afraid of repurcussions, so he burns down the house to destroy evidence. He helps Shadow escape Lakeside unnoticed, and Shadow moves to Europe, and meets the old version of Wednesday, and returns his glass eye to him. (Resolution)

Theme – It’s a bit confusing, but bear with me.

The choices we make affect the things that happen to us/in the world around us.

When the gods coerce Laura into cheating on Shadow, they guarantee Shadow meeting Wednesday.

When Shadow drops a coin into Laura’s grave, and Laura is reincarnated as a dead body, Shadow guarantees Mad Sweeney’s suicide.

When Shadow chooses to risk playing checkers against Czernobog, Czernobog agrees to fight on his side in the war.

Response Entries

Shadow’s growth throughout American Gods

In the beginning, Shadow is a kind but stubborn man, and is rigid in his beliefs. He isn’t likely to bend to someone’s will unless he’s pressed or if it’s of some benefit to him. As the novel progresses, he becomes more flexible, and more of his own person. He doesn’t believe that Wednesday is Odin in the beginning, and he thinks that there’s absolutely no way that his dead wife is sitting in his dingy hotel room. But when you look in the last few parts, as he meets new old gods (old gods who are new to him, not the new gods.), he asks questions. He asks where they’re from, he wonders about their mythological origins, he questions how they came to be in America, of all the places in the world.

In the beginning, he does Wednesday’s bidding, albeit reluctantly. As he becomes closer with Wednesday, he grows as a person, and does what he says without questioning. (well, maybe a few questions.)

Sam’s Flowers: Neil Gaiman’s Writing Style

“Then he ran after her, and put the flowers into Sam’s hands. He hurried away, so she could not give them back. Then he walked up the hill back to his car and he took Highway 90 south to Chicago. He drove at slightly under the speed limit. It was the last thing he had to do. He was in no hurry.”

In this scene, Shadow is delivering flowers to Sam as a thank you, and as a final goodbye. When the police came to take Shadow away for breaking parole, Sam came to his defense. Maybe she felt that she owed it to him, because he picked her up once when she was hitchhiking, and got her home safe, or maybe she really did want to save him. Either way, Shadow’s flowers were a nice gesture. I think Neil Gaiman wanted the reader to feel a sense of finality, and of closure. I’ll be honest, I thought this scene was sad. Shadow gives her the flowers, and she doesn’t even see him, or have time to say thank you. To her and her girlfriend, the flowers just appeared. I think Sam knew, at least deep down, who gave them to her, and that’s what makes the scene feel so sad to me. It’s a final goodbye. If I’m right about what Neil Gaiman was trying to do, then he was definitely successful, because I felt oddly moved by that paragraph.

Personal Reflection

American Gods is easily one of the best books I’ve read this year. I really only picked it out because I recognized Neil Gaiman’s name from Good Omens, Coraline, and The Graveyard Book, but I don’t regret it. His writing style is beautiful and interesting, the book is full of incredible information, and the characters are beautifully written, flawed, and so incredibly human. It was an incredibly dense book, filled with plot twists and sharp changes in every direction, but I loved every minute of it.

The entire book felt like a rollercoaster. There are scenes that have hardly anything to contribute to the plot, but are full of emotion and amazing concepts, such as the scene with Salim and the Jinn. I say it doesn’t contribute anything, but it shows how starved the gods are, and how much they’re willing to do to leave America, or at least be worshipped again. Scenes with Bilquis the Hooker, for example, show the desire gods have to be seen, but they also show how easy it is for them to be killed off once they’re forgotten. There are scenes that have nothing to do with the gods that still make you feel inexplicably moved, like when Shadow delivers Sam the flowers, or even when he’s just sitting in his hotel room talking to Laura.

American Gods is bursting at the seams with information and trivia about the different mythologies. It begins with only Norse mythology, and then BAM. Egyptian, Middle Eastern, African, and Greek characters are in it. Jesus is even mentioned at one point. You get the opportunity to learn about so many different incarnations of gods, and Neil even throws his own twist on the characters, and the ways they’ve come to be in North America as opposed to their home countries.

The way Neil Gaiman writes his characters is amazing. I could go on and on about the characterization of Shadow, or Wednesday, or even Sam, but I’ll discuss one of the more unsung heroes. Laura. In the beginning, Laura is just the woman who Shadow went to prison for, the woman who cheated on him. But once she’s revived, she’s so much more than that. She’s incredibly loyal to Shadow, and was only coerced into cheating on him by the old gods to guarantee Shadow becoming Wednesday’s right hand man. Shadow revives her, when all she really wants is her final, eternal rest. She follows him across America, never wavering. She’s rotting, and slowly falling to pieces, but she helps him. She genuinely feels deep remorse for what she’s done, and yes, she’s cold, and dead, and repulsing, but that’s what makes her so uniquely Laura. All of Neil’s characters are like this. They have genuine personalities, and make you feel things.

Part of the reason the old gods want a sacrifice is because they’re being forgotten, and they don’t know how else to reinforce their memories. Well, Neil Gaiman ensures they’ll be remembered forever through American Gods, which I’m not likely to forget any time soon.

@nico-the-overlord

#american gods #neil gaiman #schoolposting

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madandi · 2 months

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From The Times

article about the new song: "Thank you mother"

At 16 Amy Nuttall became the youngest understudy for the lead role of Christine in The Phantom of the Opera, then a year later she joined the ITV soap Emmerdale and stayed for five years. The Lancashire-born actress has since appeared in Hotel Babylon, Downton Abbey, Death in Paradise and, most recently, Mr Bates vs the Post Office. On stage she has been in My Fair Lady, Boeing-Boeing, Cabaret and Spamalot. Now 41, Nuttall is married to the actor Andrew Buchan. They live with their nine-year-old daughter and five-year-old son in Buckinghamshire.

How much is in your wallet?

No one carries cash now — everything is cashless. I did get caught short last year when my daughter lost a tooth unexpectedly. I had no money for the tooth fairy. Luckily my neighbour came to the rescue but now I always make sure I have pound coins in my wallet. Apart from that, all I have is my driver’s licence, Tesco Clubcard, Boots card, Caffè Nero stamp card and my debit card.

What credit cards do you use?

I don’t own any. When I joined Emmerdale I came home to visit my parents and for some reason I’d got myself a credit card and I was telling my dad about it and he made me get it out, got a pair of scissors and said, “Right, I want you to cut it up in front of me. Take my advice. Do not go down that road.” And it’s just stuck with me. I’ve never had one since. I think my dad knew that it would basically give me the opportunity to spend money I didn’t have, so I think it was very wise advice.

Are you a saver or a spender?

I’d love to say I’m a saver. I think I started out really well but I have become a bit of a spender. It’s mainly on my children. When I started out, aged 16, touring in The Phantom of the Opera, my first pay cheque was £500 a week, which was an absolute fortune for someone that age. I remember we were rehearsing in London before we went on tour, and I needed some new trainers, so I went to Schuh in Covent Garden. And I’ve never forgotten that feeling of buying my own trainers with my own money — and still having money in my account. After that I barely spent a penny, other than on accommodation and food. I don’t know where that girl went, as I really enjoy spending now. Back then I was very cautious. I just wish I’d had the foresight to put that money into property.

How much did you earn last year?

I’m an actress, self-employed, so it varies substantially from year to year. Sometimes I get surprise emails from my agent about royalties, saying, “Downton Abbey has been sold to this country,” or whatever, and they’re always nice little happy surprises. But generally speaking, in the last financial year — what can I tell you? — below a hundred grand, but I’m married so it all goes into one pot. So it’s not as scary because I can lean on that. People may have thought that being in Downtown Abbey meant I could put my rates up, but it’s really not the case. I always seem to land jobs where they tell you there isn’t any money in the pot. And then you find out who the lead is and you think, ah, all the money is going to that person. So it’s really not as lucrative as people perceive.

I sing too. I recently released a song called Thank You Mother, to raise money for the Brain Tumour Charity. That won’t see any personal return, but that’s fine as I want all the money to go to the charity. Overall I’m used to not knowing how things will be financially. It’s that excitement of not knowing what’s around the corner — maybe that big job with lots of money is going to turn up. That hasn’t happened yet, but you never know.

Have you ever been really hard up?

I started off well with Phantom and then Emmerdale, but when I was 22 I left and moved to London. Soon after I bought my first property in Ladbroke Grove [west London] but stupidly bought one that I was unable to sublet. I’d really stretched myself to the limit to buy it and I was relying on being in work to pay my mortgage and bills. I was the lead in Cabaret in the West End at the time, but it was a massive drop in earnings after Emmerdale and I just couldn’t cover everything, so I had to put the flat on the market. I had to move out a week after I finished Cabaret and rent a room in a flat and put all my furniture into storage. It was devastating.

Do you own a property?

I’m the joint owner of our comfortable family home in Buckinghamshire. We owned a smaller house before.

Are you better off than your parents?

I’d say my dad is probably better off than me. He recently retired but he was a criminal barrister and a judge. I have no idea how much money he earned but he was always extremely cautious and never spent money on five-star hotels. My mum was a hairdresser when they met and then did interior design for a while. Things were comfortable and my dad paid for all three of us to have a private secondary education.

Do you invest in shares?

I don’t and it’s not something I’ve ever thought about. I don’t know enough about it.

What is better for retirement, property or pension?

A bit of both. It probably changes from year to year but I think it would be safer to have a bit of property, a bit of pension.

What has been your best investment?

My house, my health and my children — not in that order.

And the worst?

I’ve not really made any great investments but I can’t think of anything that has been significantly bad either.

The most extravagant thing you’ve bought?

I bought my mum a Louis Vuitton bag because she did everything for my wedding. I just turned up on the day, which was great. I wasn’t particularly interested in doing it — she did it all. So I bought her a beautiful cream Louis Vuitton handbag, which cost about £2,000, which is an insane amount of money.

What is your money weakness?

Food, probably. I’m quite lazy, especially with the grim weather we’ve had lately. I just want to get out of the house and go to a cosy café to eat stuff I could easily make at home. My other weakness is [the homeware store] Homesense — I’m an absolute sucker for kitchen paraphernalia. Whether it’s another teapot or candle I don’t need, I’m there.

What is your financial priority?

My children. We’re a way off secondary school yet, though, so we’ll see what happens.

What would you do if you won the lottery?

First, I wouldn’t broadcast it. I’d share it among family, and I’d love to have the luxury of giving away a chunk of money to the Brain Tumour Charity. If there was any left to spoil myself, I’d love to be mortgage-free. I’d love a big house in the country with an Aga and a dog, and a holiday home in Tuscany. That would be lovely.

Do you support any charities?

I’m a patron of the Brain Tumour Charity — my mother passed away from a glioblastoma brain tumour in October, and I’ll be donating all the proceeds from Thank You Mother to them. It’s a song we played a lot at home in my mother’s final weeks. It was a very emotional time and the words in the song are very poignant to my relationship with my mum. I knew straight away that I had to do something to raise awareness of this terrible disease.

What is the most important lesson you’ve learnt about money?

That you never have enough, that it goes pretty quickly and that it doesn’t bring you true happiness. And like my parents said to me, “If you look after the pennies, the pounds will follow.” All proceeds from Thank You Mother by Amy Nuttall go to the Brain Tumour Charity

#braintumorcharity

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fatfables · 4 months

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Fat People Can Sing Too (Part One)

The Santa Rosa was on her way back to Southampton after three months at sea. Ben was relieved. It had been his first voyage, his first time working on a cruise ship, and he hadn’t really enjoyed it. Yes, the weather in the Mediterranean was much better than back home in Nottingham, and he had developed a healthy tan, but he hadn’t enjoyed the job. He had always wanted to sing for a living, of course he dreamt of being a pop star, but he had always known that this was unrealistic. Still he lived for the stage. He had twice applied to RADA and twice been rejected, instead opting for a musical school for gifted youths in Manchester. The job on the Santa Rosa had at first seemed perfect, his big chance to perform regularly to real audiences who weren’t just his mates. He was a good singer with decent range, and he was handsome, not pretty but handsome, with deep brown eyes, a constant five o’clock shadow and thick brown hair that swept over his forehead. The audiences liked him but he hadn’t been so keen on them.

It was the repetition that bored him. He sang the same nine songs to what felt like the same twenty people every night. They were not the same people every night of course, but he could have sworn that they were. A retired couple from Basingstoke and their friends, also retired from Basingstoke. A loud fat business man always on his phone, the type who could never leave his job behind. A lonely bachelor and a lonely widow. Neither of whom would talk to each other, both hoping to catch someone twenty years younger. What a waste. A gay couple, a lesbian couple, four people who would wander in and out at least three times during a one hour set, and worst of all the children. Rude, demanding, obnoxious, and always on their phones. They all applauded politely. One or two would talk to him afterwards and tell him half-heartedly how good he was and that he should be on TV. He didn’t believe them because they didn’t believe themselves. As the Santa Rosa came into harbour he was glad it was over.

David was surprised at how well Ben was looking. They had been in constant contact via text for the three months that Ben had been away and all Ben had said was how much he hated it and couldn’t wait to get back home. So when he saw Ben disembark looking very well tanned, bulked, and smiling broadly, he was a bit shocked. He had been expecting him to appear depressed and anorexic, kind of like he had been that time in college when they both smoked too much weed and got dumped in the same week. He complimented Ben on his healthy appearance but Ben just waved it off blaming it on too much sun and too much access to the staff buffet three times a day. They drove back to Nottingham in near silence.

Ben had planned to go and live back with his parents for a while but David convinced him that was a terrible idea and that he should crash on his couch until he’d worked out what to do next. At twenty five David was slightly older than his friend and had maybe assumed that Ben was a touch more mature than he actually was. Ben wasn’t by any means childish but he took David’s kindness for granted and treated his apartment like it was his parents house. He spent his days playing computer games and eating snacks on the sofa and made no effort to look for an actual job. Singers don’t work in customer service or offices and they certainly don’t labour or lay bricks. He had replied to a few trade advertisements looking for club singers or band members but had no luck and anyway he really wasn’t into emo or death metal. So like a lot of self-proclaimed artistic types he sat around on his friends sofa waiting for his dreams to come true.

When David first read the advertorial on the pop-up strewn website of what used to be called the Nottingham Evening Post he considered asking Ben first but quickly dismissed the thought. Ben would complain but wouldn’t be able to turn the chance down. This was a chance to be a pop star and although it wasn’t the way that Ben would want to do it, it was at least an opportunity. It lacked artistic integrity , which he would hate, but he wouldn’t be able to say no. David turned out to be correct. The chance of success must have been less than one in a thousand but even one in a thousand was a chance to get Ben off his sofa.

The first round auditions for the new show took place at the Theatre Royal on a Sunday morning. There were no TV cameras or judges present. Ben was asked to perform a song, he chose, I Want to Break Free by Queen, and the sound only was recorded and sent off to the BBC, where a production team would listen to it and decide if you made the cut for the first round proper in front of the cameras. Ben was nervous but performed well. Three weeks later he got a letter to say that he had been selected and he was to go to London for filming at the end of the month. He was over the moon.

David attended with Ben. The new show to be broadcast on Saturday nights was called ‘I Can Sing Too’ and it followed a very familiar format but with a twist. Which performers would go through to the next round would initially be decided by four celebrity judges, who could not see the performers, only hear them. Nothing new so far. The twist was that the judges would never get to see the performers, voting them through on their singing ability alone every week, until the grand final that is, then they would be allowed to actually watch the acts. Public voting was of course involved and began at round three. Viewer and judge votes were equally weighted until the semi-final, at that stage it was seventy five percent public and twenty five percent judges. For the final the judges had no vote, only the viewers would get to decide the winner. Ben and David had yet to get to grips with the intricacies of the show, at this stage they had no idea that Ben would even get through round one.

He almost never made it on stage. The train to St. Pancras was badly delayed and then both being inexperienced with London they had gotten lost on the tube. When they arrived at the BBC they once more lost themselves in a maze of corridors looking for the right studio and set of dressing rooms. They had a strange conversation with a security guard who had eventually pointed them in the right direction after at first seeming to be very confused. Ben told him that he was to be on the new singing show, to which the guard said, “Oh you mean FPCS2.” Ben and David had no idea what the man was on about, “No, It’s called I Can Sing Too” Ben explained. “That’s kinda what I said” the guard had responded with a smirk, “I’m surprised you’re on that show. You’re really not so big.” “Er thanks,” Ben replied with growing uncertainty as to what was happening.

The guard did show them the correct way and Ben made it into make-up with less than five minutes to spare. There some nice scouse ladies powered his face, did his hair, and dressed him in a tight revealing translucent t-shirt that clung to the thin layer of podge that his stomach and chest had developed while he was on the cruise ship. He had protested and said he wanted to wear his own clothes but the scousers said that choice of clothing was contractually theirs and that it was just to keep the housewives happy at home. “You’re a good looking boy” they said “If you want them to vote for you in the later rounds then you need them to start liking you now.”

Ben sang ‘I’ll Make Love to You’ by Boyz ll Men and the judges voted him through in second place. He was ecstatic. Three contestants out of ten were taken forward to the next round the others were a fat old pensioner who crooned out a long forgotten Tony Bennett hit and a brother/sister combo who were so misshapen and ugly that it was hard to correctly gender assign them. All of the successful contestants were assigned a voice/career coach to help them train for the forthcoming rounds.

Ben’s coach was called Brian. He was a friendly but directly spoken thirty something with round rimmed glasses, a penchant for red wine, and his own house in Notting Hill. Not a couch in Nottingham. Brian had explained to Ben and David that they needed to find Ben a sad backstory, a sob-story to endear him to the housewives. “They need to feel sorry for you and sympathise with you at the same time as they want to fuck you.” Brian was nothing if not to the point. Ben hated the idea, he protested that he wanted to win based on his talent and nothing else. Brian laughed at him, “Gareth Gates had his speech impediment. Susan Boyle was as ugly as an arsehole with piles. You need to have something wrong with you. A weakness that is not your fault.” “Who’s Gareth Gates?” Ben had asked. “Oh, don’t worry about him, I’m pretty sure he’s dead now,” Brian replied.

After an hour or so of going round in circles with terrible ideas David finally chipped in with, “Didn’t your gran die from complications with her diabetes last year?” “Yeah but she was like eighty seven and I barely ever saw her.” “It’s a start,” said Brian jumping in on the faintest whiff of a workable idea. David was suddenly hit with the gift of inspiration, “And now you’ve been diagnosed with diabetes too!” “I have?” Brian purposefully misconstrued what Ben said. “That’s perfect! Having the same disease that killed your gran, your poor gran, who you loved so dearly and meant the world to you. Well that must be terrifying! That’s the sympathy card! That’s an ongoing problem and character development!” “I’m sure that lots of housewives have diabetes or know someone who does,” David chipped in. He was getting good at this. It was agreed. Ben had no say in it. He was now a young diabetic singer and needed to learn his place - if he wanted to be a pop star...

#gainer stories #weight gain stories #bhm weight gain #big fatty #fat belly #fat boy #feederism kink #feeder feedee #gay gainer #gay gainer stories #gaining fat

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chickensarentcheap · 1 year

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Little snippet from Never Gonna Be Alone

@tragiclyhip @youflickedtooharddamnit @munstysmind @mrsmungus @secretaryunpaid @themaradaniels @residentdormouse @thesirenrealm @muchadoaboutcj @asirensrage and anyone who reads, supports etc :D

(For context, Esme and her sister Riley, talking about an upcoming family wedding)

WARNING: a tad NSFW based on topic of conversations lol

“It’s open bar. We can get loaded on his dime.”

“Tempting, but not a total sell. I seriously do have to mull it over. And talk to my husband about it. Something tells me he isn’t going to be too keen on the idea. Considering everything Kyle has said and done? Not to mention the grief caused by the rest of my family? I don’t think Tyler is going to like the thought of being around them. He knows they drive me mental. And I don’t think he wants me having a psychotic break thousands of miles from home.”

“Maybe you can convince him to go. Offer ass play. That usually does it.”

“Bold of you to assume we don’t already do stuff like that. That ship has long sailed. It’s a regular thing now.”

“God, does he realize how lucky he is? Is that why he buys you so many nice things? Is your ass that special?”

“I’ll have you know that he buys things ‘just because’. It has nothing to do with my ass and what he’s allowed to do with it.”

“Sure it’s not. I’m going to call him an ass bandit. See his reaction.”

“Like it would bother him. There’s no shame in his game. He’s proud of his handiwork and his skills of persuasion.”

“See what happens when you get good dick? Your common sense goes right out the window. I still don’t know how he doesn’t break you in half.”

“And I’m still not giving you the details on how we manage things. But I will talk to him. About the wedding. Maybe I have my own skills of persuasion to use. It’s going to take some work. To get him to agree to go.”

“Daily blow jobs for a month or two?”

“Also bold of you to assume. It’s been almost every day, twice a day for about ten years.”

“No wonder the marriage is still going strong,” Riley teases. “No wonder he doesn’t have eyes for anyone else.”

“My man is satisfied and then some. Speaking of which…”

“What? It’s time to go satisfy him? You have a reminder set in your cell phone or something?”

“No. He’s not even home. But he will be. Soon. With Nugget. And I’ve got about five huge boxes and just as many bags of groceries to put away. And as much as I want to spend my day talking to you and sipping hot chocolate with Baileys in it…”

“It’s not even noon there. Are you becoming the town slut AND drunk?”

“You’ve been the town slut since grade nine. It would take a lot to dethrone you. But I should go. I do have six other children to take care of. I do have to keep them alive.”

“Just throw them bread and water. They’ll be fine. Well maybe not Mildred. Maybe water will make her turn. Like a gremlin.”

“The last thing I need is more of her. I’m not going to take the chance.” She downs the remains of her drink, then stands and stretches languorously. “I gotta go. Real life beckons. Time to put on my wife and mommy hat.”

“What do you put on when you’re offering your old man the caboose?”

#Tyler and Esme series #Never Gonna Be Alone

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crestfallon · 4 months

Text

✦ ・— [ riz ahmed. cis man. he/him. ] || OMG! Was that RAYAN RAFIQ wearing the new Chanel boots? Hard to believe that a INKOGNITO OWNER / FREELANCE MODEL could afford those. Ugh, I hate to say it but they kind of pull it off. When you’re THIRTY NINE, I guess you think you can do anything. They’ve only been in fashion for at least FOUR YEARS and I’ve heard that they’re SNARKY and DEEPLY ARTISTIC but don’t believe everything you read! According to THE WORD ON THE STREET, they’re actually BITTER and UNRELIABLE. Ha! Well, I hope they know a million others would kill to be them. They better be watching their back. That’s all. ||

Their Current Rank: 1 Star - though he personally has found some attention, through social media mostly by freelance modeling && pushing his tattoo career to the next level, guest appearing on specific shows, and performing artistry at conventions, etc, his name is unknown outside the direct, relatively small bubble of the community. he craves more.

basics:

under co still, will fill out the rest later

nicknames: ray, to his friends.

birthplace: texas, usa.

sexuality: bisexual.

religion: raised muslim, not really practicing, mostly agnostic, tends to do a little more than he normally would around ramadan.

relationship: in a relationship with owen burr

date of birth: nov 11th.

zodiac sign: scorpio.

extended traits:

hobbies: drawing (both sketchbook and digital, he loves to do pen drawings), tattooing, spray-painting, sometimes will blow the dust off his old, cracked skateboard and then shake his head no. he likes fashion-related reality tv, coffee in the mornings and a rolled joint to start the day. eating cereal for dinner. photoshoots, dancing, live music, taking pictures and memorializing everything. getting what he wants.

dislikes:

labels/inspo: the deadpan snarker, the artiste, the black sheep, the maverick.

BACKSTORY.

+ (subplot information) i would love for ray to have been involved in the robbery, somehow! possibly as a fence, a buyer, or even as a direct hand involved in the operation. he is willing, and desperate, to do anything to save his shop, his team, his career, and his reputation... and, hey, fame wouldn't be too bad, either. he has dreams, certainly. ADDITIONALLY, if he had to take a side in the suspicion thrown between the rivalling companies, he would loosely side with suberbia, as any/all attempts to get into the haus of red whatsoever has failed, and he may be bitter.. (subplot information ends).

big dream central for ray, honestly - his parents were immigrants from pakistan, and he was raised to work hard, never give up on his dreams, protect his own, and value his morals, above all else. he was taught to live humbly, comfortably, and his parents had little but love to offer their children, and worked long hours. he was the youngest, and the only to be born in the states, americanized from the beginning and always felt a little too large for their little life. none of their dreams seemed to fit his, but they were older, and they let him fly the nest after a few hard years of trying to tame his beast within. he never did allow it to settle, and he blossomed quickly.

full of ideas, of emotion, of thoughts, of energy, of beauty - rayan was everything that could fill a room, and he was every bit as awkward about expressing it. he fit like two left gloves, his dad would say, and he agreed. he just... was odd, in a way, that most others didn't understand. he worked for the year book committee, he loved to draw, excelled in any sort of artistic setting, and struggled with academics, but was relatively happy throughout his life.

jobs, and regular living, were always a bore. he just wanted to create, so create he did. bummed out throughout art school, bounced around jobs for awhile more, slept on couches, lived in a garage of a buddy for over a year, and finally started to figure things out.

when he bought inkognito five years ago, he didn't expect everything to change, but it did. he has a crew he adores, and he found some success on social media through his freelancing, becoming some sort of form of influencer type, tattoo artist personality in a smaller knit alternative industry... but he craved luxury. he always wanted more, so he tried and failed and tried a few more times to get into the industry as a model. or a photographer. or a designer. he doesn't care, he just wants to be part of the world he feels is so far away...

WANTED.

art hoes/creative friends; he went to art school, he hangs out in art museums, he will sketch while on the beach, he has digital art online that has gained popularity, he loves poetry - if it's anything deeply moving, artistic, or alternative/niche, he's there. a little art hoe crew would be a cute idea?

roommate(s), past; he's been a couch surfer before, and would proudly do it again, and has lived all over the place between texas and california, and especially los angeles. i would love a meredith grey/grey's anatomy situation in his life, where it's a revolving door to anyone who is fighting with their partner, needing a crash place, etc.

those rich, network friends; when you have a shop that close to the elite in the industry, and model at times when you get real lucky, you get to know people. these are ray's prized possessions; his ticket in, and in some cases, his genuine friends. others? nah, total marks. he'd use 'em in a heartbeat.

other freelance models/designers/etc; anyone else breaking into the business who he can scheme with, stragetize with, gossip with, etc!! would love some models he has worked with before in passing, or fellow social media budding stars.

exes/flings; he's never been one for commitment before, but he's been in la for at least seven or eight years at minimum, so i imagine within that time, he's tried to plant roots once or twice. probably almost fell in love once or twice, but they never worked out. we can plot why. now he is in a serious relationship for the first time, so maybe there is a chance at mending old bridges and regaining old friends?

#haushq.intro #;; introducing -> RAYAN r.

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all-the-things-2020 · 5 months

Text

Further Along the Way - Chapter Two

Summary: Things are not going well in the Djarin household until Din gets a lead on a job.

Rating: PG

Notes - Mando’a words:

dar’manda = a state of not being Mandalorian

buir = parent, mother, father

ad = child, son, daughter

briikase = happy

It had been a month since they’d sold the Razor Crest. They had enough credits to cover rent and food for a good eight or nine months, but Din would still feel better if he could just find a steady job. Most of the leads he’d had were for short term jobs, and many were just too dangerous to take Mariana and Ad’ika on, and the rest barely paid enough to cover the cost of transport to the planet they were on. It was frustrating. And it didn’t help that Mariana was getting a bit cranky as her pregnancy progressed.

“I don’t know why I shouldn’t take the job,” she said one evening. “It’s temporary, and you’re not working, so you can watch Ad’ika.”

Din took a deep breath and counted to ten. Mariana had been offered a position filling in for a teacher at the local grammar school who was taking a two month sabbatical. It was with very small children, really glorified babysitting with very little actual teaching, but it would bring in a decent amount of credits. Still, Din was not thrilled with the idea.

“I’d rather you didn’t make a commitment like that right now,” he said carefully. “Two months is a long time.”

Mariana humphed. “Two months is nothing. It’s not like you’ve got anything lined up, anyway.”

“Mar’ika, I’m trying,” he said, rubbing his hand over his face. He was trying very hard not to snap at her but his patience was wearing thin.

“I know you are,” she said, squeezing his shoulder. “But who knows how long it will take to find the right offer? Why not take advantage of this opportunity while we have it?”

He reached up and placed his hand over hers. “I just don’t want you to take any risks, cyar’ika.”

She pulled her hand away. “I don’t think a school is such a dangerous place. I’d be working with little kids, Din, not a bunch of criminals.” She paced the small, one room apartment they’d been renting like a caged wild loth-cat. “I know you want to protect me, but I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself. I did it for years before you came along.”

“You’d still be a slave if I hadn’t rescued you,” he snapped back.

She glared at him. He didn’t make her angry often, but he’d learned that it was not a smart thing to do. “Oh, forgive me, great savior. I forgot I’m supposed to thank you profusely every day of my life.”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” he said, but she was already storming away and into the ‘fresher, the only place to be alone in the tiny apartment. “Cyar’ika,” he called. “Don’t be like this.” How am I going to get through five more months of this?

Ad’ika was wisely playing by himself in the corner. The kid had quickly learned that when Mommy was in a bad mood, it was best to steer clear of her. He cocked his head and gave Din a sad look, shaking his little head. Smart kiddo.

Din sat quietly, waiting for Mariana to come out of the ‘fresher. When she did reappear, she didn’t look much calmer. “I’m going out for a walk,” she said. “I need to get out of here.”

“Mar’ika …” he began but she cut him off.

“Don’t Mar’ika me,” she snapped. “I might be your wife, but I don’t belong to you. So stop acting like I’m a helpless idiot who needs to be protected at all times. I may have been a slave but at least made it through reasonably well-adjusted.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He knew he shouldn’t engage her when she was like this, but he couldn’t help it.

“I’m not the one who hid behind a helmet for twenty-odd years,” she shot back.

Din had no response. He stood, scooped up Ad’ika and walked out the door.

****************

Mariana collapsed on the couch. Shit, shit, shit, she thought. She’d gone too far this time. She knew she’d been being a bitch lately, but she couldn’t help it. The apartment was so small, and her hormones were all over the place. One second she felt like crying because she saw a baby bird out the window; the next she wanted to stab someone because her bootlace had come untied. She was gaining weight and felt dumpy and unattractive, which was ridiculous, because Din was just as amorous as ever, although with Ad’ika sleeping in the same room, they didn’t often get the chance to do more than kiss and cuddle.

She just wished he’d find a job so they could settle down properly. This apartment was cheap and convenient, but not really big enough for the three of them, and it definitely wouldn’t be big enough for four. And now she’d snapped at him and driven him away. Din was quite patient with her most of the time, but she knew she’d really hurt him if he’d taken Ad’ika with him.

It was well over an hour before she heard the door open and Din and Ad’ika stepped into the room. “I brought food,” he said evenly, setting a paper bag down on the table. There were several inexpensive food vendors in their neighborhood and it was often just as cheap to buy meals from them as it was to cook, especially since the kitchen in the apartment wasn’t much bigger than the one in the Razor Crest.

He placed Ad’ika on his high chair and took some plates out of the cupboard. He divvied up the food and set the plates around the table. Mariana took her seat and pulled her plate closer. It was her favorite: grilled vegetables and meat from the stand on the corner next to the park.

Ad’ika and Din began eating silently, but she had no appetite right now. She reached out and placed her hand on Din’s. “I’m sorry,” she said softly. “I don’t know why I said that. I don’t know why I do half the things I’ve been doing lately.”

Din stopped eating and twined his fingers through hers. “I know,” he said. “And I’m sorry, too. I pushed you too far.”

“No, no, you didn’t,” she insisted. “I overreacted. Again.” She sighed and lifted his hand to her lips. “I’ll try to do better.”

“It’s not your fault, cyar’ika,” he said. “We’re all still adjusting to everything. I’m adjusting to being dar’manda; you’re adjusting to being pregnant; all three of us are adjusting to living in this tiny apartment … to be honest, Ad’ika is handling things the best. You and I … we’re just muddling through.”

Ad’ika nodded solemnly, although the effect was spoiled by the food that was sticking out of his mouth. Little man really needed to work on taking small bites instead of swallowing things whole.

“Eat,” Din said. “Before Ad’ika steals your dinner.” He made a face at the child, who giggled and grabbed the last bite of food off his own plate.

Mariana picked up her fork and began to eat. She was afraid to ask exactly what kind of meat the cook used, but it was delicious, as always. Din took another bite, then leaned back in his chair.

“Ad’ika and I had a little talk while we were out,” he said. “Remember the time you told me I was broken?”

Mariana put down her fork. “Yes. But I admitted I was broken, too, if you recall.”

Din nodded. “I know. Eat.” He waited until she’d picked her fork back up and taken another bite. “Anyway, I was thinking about being broken and I realized that yes, I’m still broken, and probably always will be, but I'm a lot less broken than I used to be, and it’s all because of the two of you. All three of us are orphans, cast aside, battered by the winds of fate … whatever you want to call it, we’re messed up. But we found each other and together we’ll get through anything the galaxy can throw at us. Even unemployment and a crappy apartment —“

“Crazy hormonal mood swings,” she interrupted with a self-deprecating laugh.

“Especially those,” Din went on, smiling. “Hell, I’d rather face a squad of Deathtroopers than you sometimes.” He winked and she made a face.

“It’s all your fault,” she said. “I didn’t make this baby by myself.”

Din’s face turned serious. “That’s another thing,” he said. “You keep talking about how I’m the only one making any sacrifices, but I just got to do the fun part in this case. You’re the one who has to go through all the shitty parts of pregnancy. I’ve been reading the same stuff you have, and believe me, cyar’ika, if I could do any of it for you, I would. But biology is biology and … I just want to make things easier for you.”

Ad’ika nodded sagely again, and once again the effect was spoiled when he burped loudly. Mariana was grateful, though, because it made her laugh instead of succumb to the tears she’d felt rising during Din’s little speech. Stars, I love these boys, she thought.

“Excuse you,” she said to Ad’ika, tweaking his nose. He laughed and climbed up on the table to approach her.

“Ma,” he said, holding out his arms for a hug. She snuggled him to her chest. As she sometimes did when holding him, she felt … something tickling at the back of her mind. She knew he’d communicated mentally with Luke Skywalker back on Florian, and she thought he was trying to do the same with her. She wasn’t Force-sensitive, though, and never quite made the connection. Still, she felt calmer and braver … and hungrier. Cradling her son in one arm, she attacked her dinner with the other.

Din cleared the table as soon as she was done, and she took Ad’ika over to the couch. Din joined them and they snuggled together.

“Buir,” Ad’ika said, patting Din on the chest.

“Yes, ad?” Din replied lazily. If Ad’ika was just talking to them, he used their names (or his best approximation of them), but if he wanted something, he called them parent in Mando’a.

“Briikase?”

Happy.

“Yes,” Mariana answered. “Yes, ad, we are.”

*********************************

She slept late the next morning and was startled awake by something crashing to the floor.

“Sorry, sorry,” Din said hurriedly. She sat up to see him packing a duffel bag.

“What’s going on?” She asked, still a bit sleep-muddled.

“I’m leaving,” he said, and instantly she was fully awake.

“What? No! I thought … I thought everything was good between us.” She nearly fell out of bed, her feet tangled in the blankets in her haste to get to him. Her heart was pounding out of her chest.

“It is, it is,” he said, taking her in his arms and kissing her gently. “Sorry, I should have explained.” He was clearly excited about something; she could see a sparkle in his eyes that quite frankly she’d missed lately. “I have an interview for a job on Thantos Prime. The comm came through early this morning, and if I catch the next transport to Davos — which leaves about an hour — I can make the connection in time for the interview.”

“A job? What is it?”

“Combat instructor at a military academy,” he said, releasing her and going back to throwing things into his bag. “Karga put in a word for me with an old friend in case anything ever came up, and the instructor at this academy just quit to go home and fight in some civil war on his home planet. They need a replacement, and Karga’s friend contacted me.”

“It sounds perfect for you,” she said. “You’ve certainly got the skills for it. And bajur is one of the pillars of the Mandalorian creed, right?”

He smiled at her. “Your Mando’a is getting better. And yes, teaching children is very important to the Mando’ade. Even former ones like me.” He zipped up the duffel. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, cyar’ika.”

“Good luck,” she said. “I have a good feeling about this.”

“So do I,” he admitted. Then he kissed her, swung the duffel over his shoulder and walked out the door.

Mariana crawled back into bed. Ad’ika was still sound asleep and she didn’t want to waste the precious quiet time. She curled up under the blankets and rested her hand on her belly. “I think things are finally looking up for us, little one,” she whispered. She gasped as the child fluttered inside her as if in agreement. “Oh, stars, not you too,” she muttered. “One Force-sensitive child is more than enough in this family, thank you very much.” Chuckling to herself, she drifted back to sleep.

#the mandalorian #star wars #grogu #baby yoda #din djarin #pedro pascal character fanfiction #din djarin x original female character #din djarin fanfiction

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