🎶 Grandpa's gonna sue the pants off of Santa.
That's what Grandpa's gonna do.
Grandpa's gonna sue the pants off of Santa,
'cause Grandma would have wanted him to 🎶
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer (2002) Scene Redraw
They may look like Daphne and Velma, but they are in fact Cousin Mel and I. M. Slime from Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer. Most of this was done on stream. Thank you so much again anonymous for your patronage!
ok my brother fell asleep (we were the last 2 awake) & I can’t decide what Christmas special to watch next on my own (I’m tipsy but wide awake) SO guess you guys are getting a post on a movie my family watched earlier today where I fell into my typical “IT (must be)‘s EXHAUSTING ALWAYS ROUTING FOR THE ANTI HERO!!” I WILL route for the *character that’s not actually that bad but the narrative wants us to hate them* mode
let’s fucking TALK about Cousin Mel!!! because she’s actually the legit hero of “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer” despite the film (apparently? it’s a weird fucking movie I forgot how weird it is lmao) wanting you to believe otherwise
first of all —- Cousin Mel is introduced as a “villain” ( the quotation marks are SO necessary ) because… & I’m serious here… she doesn’t want Grandma to keep giving shit away for FREE from her STORE. that’s it. that’s literally it. And little Jake (I think that’s his name but we’ve also watched several shows & movies since then & this kid is such a brat he doesn’t deserve for me to google his name) thinks this is a REAL asshole move. also, despite being told by multiple people that Santa is fake, Jake insists on believing & Cousin Mel is framed as SOOoOO evil for mocking him. even tho… his mom sister & dad ALSO tell him Santa is fake..
then the ENTIRE spankenheimer family give up the search for Grandma AND seem exhausted running the store.
but when Austin Butler wants to buy it for MILLIONS ( YES that’s a quote) & Cousin Mel wants to take the deal, SHE’S evil for that just because baby brat jAkE is against the idea??? because??! Sentimentality I fucking guess? Excuse me??? Ex fuckkng SCUSE me??
Also!! also. I would like to point out that Jake’s family are EXCITED about the deal also!!! his parents are hyped to retire. grandpa is ready for some cash. jake’s sister would get college funded. like…. selling this stupid fucking store would he good for EVERYONE
and then. and then. I MAYBE (maybe) could’ve accepted the ending with Santa getting off Scott free for his hit & run (side note WHY don’t we ever talk about the “got run over by a reindeer” amnesia ward that casually exists in the North Pole in this movie?? ?grandma wasn’t the only victim!!) (Santa in this universe SHOULD be prosecuted!!) but instead of being an anti capitalist “aww let grandma run her small business” message.. the movie ends with Austin butler franchising Grandma’s store & her casually getting run over AGAIN as a JOKE
literally Cousin Mel’s only “crimes” were disliking Christmas (fair, her entire family hated her for no reason), not wanting the family business to give shit away for free, & prosecuting Santa for a crime he DID commit!!!!
cousin mel was the fu king HERO of this movie & I won’t hear otherwise!!!!!
I headcanon Cousin Mel lost her parents during the holiday season and as a result stopped caring about it. She doesn't understand why the rest of her family could still be so happy. Doesn't excuse her actions obviously but it does explain why she's so cranky and greedy.