#but that means I suffer

[artisticcrow]

Still devastated by the fact that Oli’s Vod Channel dose not in fact have all of his past streams

#It's behind by like 4 months #Please bestie #I just want to watch you're streams without having to fuck with Twitches awful vod player #It trashes my pc so badddddddddddddddddddd #We both know oli's high end quality editing content takes 3000 years do to how much work goes into it #but that means I suffer #and maybe sometimes I just wanna hear the echos of chat interaction without my computer getting fucked #like twitch is so unfriendly to pcs that can't tank shit #:( #this is misery #Oli theorionsound #Vent #Except it's more like #Whiney Baby Hours for artistic crow #textpost #Oli #theorionsound #complaining #Tell me if I need to tag anything else #but really this is just a post that will be thrown into the void and be forgotten

[noknowshame]

why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?

#instant conversation enders for my multiple youth pastor cousins #don’t say it (I’m gonna say it) #The Child is The Price #but i mean come on #as someone who isn't actually even christian the real-life historical version of this is still cursed as fuck #i mean we know that jesus was a person who existed. whatever circumstances he was born in #its terrifyingly ominous to imagine being so unaware of the affect your child will have on the future of humanity #time itself will one day be counted around your birth of him #and all because he will suffer an excruciatingly painful death that you will not be able to prevent #not only that. but regardless of his or your intentions #regardless of whether there is a god #for millenea unfathomable millions will have blood spilled and will spill blood in his name #atrocities will be committed that you cannot even conceive of #and all on his and your behalf #you love your child. its beautiful. but there's horror in what you've done. because everyone else will love him too #and what's more dangerous than that?

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[literarymerritt]

Thinking about Them 🥺

Art Tumblr | Twitter

#xmen #x men #x men 97 #roguegambit #x men fanart #rogue #gambit #remy lebeau #anna marie lebeau #HELP i've fallen into roguegambit HELL and i can't get out #and when i say Hell i mean it i'm fucking Suffering over here #i'm so so emo over them just want them to be soft and happy and safe and in love #also have the BIGGEST fattest crush ever on these two god #especially rogue oh my god #THE girl ever that southern accent has bewitched me body and soul #xmen97 you don't want to know what will happen if you don't fucking give them back to me #art #my art #literarymerritt #merritt draws

[yudol-skorbi]

manic pixie dream gunslinger

#critical role #cr1 #vox machina #percival de rolo #percy de rolo #fanart #art #faint world without logos plays on the background #well at least that was the inspiration #it all went to hell somewhere in the middle #he is soooo edgy i love it #wanted to draw something like this for ages #i am kinda trying to prove to myself that i can do backgrounds #i mean if i suffer hard enough

[bleakbluejay]

you motherfuckers have no concept of what "land back" or "decolonize" even mean. you're too busy demonizing entire groups of people, terrified, shitting yourselves, that they'll do even half of the horrors to you that you've done to them for decades or centuries. this shit comes off as hella racist for real. you hate arabs so much. you hate first nations people so much. you hate black people so much. even if you sympathize with them, you can't fucking bear the idea of them gaining freedom, independence, autonomy, safety, because you're so, so scared they'll hurt you back and cause chaos in the streets. these same people who just want to rebuild. who just want to go home. who just want to see their families again. who just want food. who just want medical care. who just want dry, warm shelter. you're so focused on the ideas of colonization, of "us vs. them", of one people displacing the other for a state to exist, that you cannot comprehend coexistence, and your only idea of peace is if an entire group of people were just gone and dead.

grow the fuck up. for the love of GOD, grow the fuck up.

#eli talks #rant #i just watched a video shared by someone i'd been following a while denying the genocide occuring in gaza entirely #are you kidding. are you fucking kidding me. #the video was trying to run with the idea that “from the river to the sea” means jewish people will be expelled from the region #no the fuck it does not you stupid motherfucker that's NOT what decolonization is #anyway. land back. decolonize. from the river to the sea. peace and love on planet earth. #stop razing olive trees. stop scorching the earth. stop bombing hospitals and schools. stop destroying the sea. #if i have to see another palestinian child undergo anesthesia-free amputation im going to start being physically fucking violent #if i have to see another mother with blood on her hands wailing and begging for her child to come back im going to start burning shit #one day all the people of palestine will be free. muslims and jews and christians and all and none. #one day all the people of sudan will be free. all the people in the congo will be free. all the peoples in the americas will be free. #and all the other occupied places suffering genocides and ethnic cleansings that the news neglects to mention. theyll be free too.

[hilacopter]

conflating diaspora jews with the actions of the israeli government is not okay, yes, but have you considered it's not okay to conflate israeli jews with them either

#listen. no hate to diaspora jews. y'all are suffering unimaginable antisemitism rn. #but as an israeli it makes me so mad how they're always the only ones leftists care about when it comes to antisemitism if even #“nooo guys we can't be mean to diaspora jews because of isnotreal it's antisemitic and wrong!” #“israelis? now those are completely fine to harass and wish death upon <3” #people just straight up don't see us as humans deserving of basic decency i think #when they at very least pretend to or believe they like diaspora jews #leftist antisemitism #antisemitism #israel #jumblr

[princess-of-morkva]

thinking about. how merlin brings out the best in arthur and on the other hand arthur brings out the darkest parts of merlin. how arthur always tries to be better and do the right thing because merlin believes in him and he wouldn't want to disappoint him. because he believes merlin is good and he wants to be good for him. how merlin always ends up making the worst decision in his desire to protect arthur, doing things he never thought he'd do. how from saving arthur's life because that's a right thing to do, he goes to putting his life above any of his own morals.

#wrote this down a few hours ago #i think about it A LOT #it's tragedy baby #it's why i love this show #and yes of course i love my babies #and that means i love all of them #including their suffering #merlin bbc #merlin #arthur pendragon #merthur #bbc merlin

[stil-lindigo]

Context: Israel “allowed” aid in the forms of flour bags to be airdropped into Gaza, waited for hundreds to congregate, and then opened fire into the crowd of desperate, starving Palestinians. 150 Palestinians were killed. Hundreds more wounded. This is being called “The Flourbag Massacre”.

source

Meanwhile, over on the other side…

#the things I want to say about Israeli Zionists would get me blasted off this website #but I’ll settle for something like - #these people are depraved fascist fucks who should be tried and punished at the fucking hague #and made to suffer through even a fraction of the immense pain and suffering that they’ve forced onto palestinians #also. as someone who’s not a US citizen but js unfortunately part of the world the US influences #god I am fucking begging you neoliberal fucks to recognise what continuing support for Biden MEANS #please. PLEASE organise #free palestine #palestine #free gaza

[daftmooncretin]

richard siken (crush.)

#when they protect eachother despite everything #i adore ed but they suffered so much and they did what they had to #is there any better trope then choosing kindness and found family #richard wrote this for them real #ofmd #izzy hands #our flag means death #frenchie ofmd #fang ofmd #jim jimenez #izzy ofmd #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers

[ex-jock-enthusiast]

Tommy winkler is my favorite unintentional gainer

An excellent suggestion anon!

If you're looking for more content on this guy, @jake-is-still-drunk made a great post a while back covering him in more detail. But yeah holy shit the only two constants in life are twink death and taxes huh

#bulk #bulking #ex jock #exjock #hunky to chunky #fittofat #male gainer #belly #gay gainer #weight gain #i would say #i don't think its unintentional 😉 #unfortunately his followers suffer from chronic 'dont understand the concept of a kink' disease #like jesus christ people #take a walk #read a book #call your parents #stop commenting mean things on influencers' instagram pages

[harmonysanreads]

#SUFFERING THROUGH SCHOOL WAS WORTH IT #I'm not even a die-hard scara simp BUT I WAS COUNTING DOWN THE DAYS #man. #this gremlin knows his power #i mean look at that grin #harmonysan.txt #genshin impact #scaramouche #wanderer

[indecisitivity]

current status: waiting for the new tmagp episode to hit spotify like a 1940s woman waiting for her husband to return from the war

#tmagp #the magnus protocol #which means there are constant longing glances and long-suffering sighs #man i miss having all 200 episodes queued up and ready for my bingeing pleasure

[laz-kay]

“Sounds like a hoot. Probably a good thing if I tag along, huh? Stay for dinner, make amusing small talk”.

Bob's Burgers, The Amazing Rudy (S14: E2)

#i will never shut up about this #my babies #i genuinely believe rudy has helped louise grow as a person sm #you can tell how much he means to her and vice versa #they’re the cutest little beans i’m in tears #bob and linda watching them from the window is just adorable please #I’m going to suffer this season i know it #bobs burgers #bobs burgers spoilers #bobs burgers season 14 #the amazing rudy #louise belcher #rudy stieblitz #regular sized rudy #louise x rudy #louwheeze #bob belcher #linda belcher

[solanj]

Learn to draw Heinrix or die: the challenge ("Die" seems a much more likely outcome with the way it's going so far, tbh) This one was supposed to be a study of a Jeremy Irons shot, but for some mystical reason while Irons looks similar to Heinrix (in my eyes at least), whenever the picture started to look like Irons it stopped looking like Heinriix at all. So at this point there is not much similarities left to either of them, but, well, at least it started to resemble Heinrix at least a liiiiitle tiny bit

#warhammer 40k #rogue trader #heinrix van calox #solanj art #study #no Heinrix you will not be free from me no matter how much you resist #I might suffer but I'm far too obsessed to let you go <3 #and if you refuse to be drawn properly... #well that only means that you'll continue to get a new face every time I try

[uncanny-tranny]

I think it's so relatable to see trans women and transfem and generally people who no longer have a testosterone-dominant system describing what it was like to have a testosterone-dominant system. I find that often, when they talk about being angry, depressed, irate, or just irritable, I relate because that was me before I went on testosterone. I was so fucking angry and irate and genuinely unpleasant to exist around because I didn't have testosterone.

See, I think instead of estrogen or testosterone being the "bad, angry" hormone, it's more like... of course trans people who need hormones are going to be unpleasant before getting hormones - both your body and your brain require that you have a certain level of hormone balance. Of course somebody like me was fucking furious all the time, the brain does weird shit when its needs aren't fulfilled!

This isn't about criticizing any one group of trans people, rather, I encourage people to remember that ascribing inherent qualities to certain traits (e.g., saying "estrogen is such a horrible hormone!") isn't necessarily good. It's absolutely fine to talk about personal experiences with pre-transition, I do that all the time! The only issue is bioessentializing hormones, in essence, ascribing inherentness to traits we often share.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #this is not to discourage people from expressing negative things about their being pre-transition - again that's not what i mean #i talk very negatively about my experiences being pre-transition because it WAS negative. i suffered every day pre-transition... #...but i still look at people going in the direction i ran away from like a man on fire and i find peace in it... #...because that means my experiences weren't horrible for *everyone*. there is something worth it to other folks... #...so i feel as though i have less personal responsibility for Upkeeping Order or whatever... #...somebody has HAPPILY taken over my shifts and i have perhaps taken theirs with similar enthusiasm... #...and that doesn't mean any of it is Inherently Bad