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ashesandhackles · 7 months

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HP Reread - Order of Phoenix (Part 3)

Chapter 25, 26,27,28 - OOTP

Antonin Dolohov murdered the Prewett brothers. He will later kill Remus. He is repeatedly implied to be a very deadly Death Eater, and it is his slashing spell that will hurt Hermione in the climax of OOTP.

Harry feeling horrified and guilty at Bode's death: "How come we didnt recognise the Devil's Snare? We have seen this before, we could have stopped this from happening":(

Hermione deciding to send Skeeter a letter due to the seriousness of the breakout, and how much there is need to change the narrative. lol at her being vague with her plans that makes Ron grumble: "would it kill her to tell us what she is up to?"

Lee being an absolute king in trying to turn Umbridge's decree against her. However, he gets a bleeding hand for his effort and Harry has to recommend him essence of murtlap (an info Lee relays to Fred and George, which helps their products)

Neville improving in DA classes so unnervingly that he is only behind Hermione in mastering the Shield Charm.

LOLLL the entire scene at Puddifoot, where Harry feels like if Roger and his girlfriend kept kissing, he would be expected to compete. And then he looks up to avoid looking at them (or Cho), and cherubs throw confetti in his face.

Harry grabbing the sugar bowl when Cho takes her hand off the table. Harry laughing when he finally understands that Cho is jealous of Hermione. Oh god. The second hand embarrassment is real.

Hermione cornering Rita is such fun. XD I love that she makes use of resources at hand - even if she doesnt think much of the Quibbler herself. (Also, she took Sirius' advice, and kept the meeting in Three broomsticks instead of Hog's Head).

The breakout had gifted Harry a desire to do something, and he talked about the most traumatic night of his life so far to a journalist he did not trust on account of that. This also shows his faith in Hermione's facilitation of his need for justice. These two will be scary in the Ministry together.

also, Hermione knowing that Ginny has been sneaking around with their brooms since she was 6, and her implicit criticism of the way people talk about Ron: "at least my happiness doesnt depend on goalkeeping ability"

"You are banned as long as Umbridge is in the school" - Ginny's association with hope, with future, and comfort.

Angelina not letting Ron resign and Harry giving Ron the space to go to bed and pretend to sleep if he needed to <3

Harry being impressed with Ginny's performance and then going, "I would have been faster tho" the audacity of this boy XD

"An interview? What do you mean?" "I mean a reporter asked me questions and I answered her" and Harry throws the Quibbler at her. LMAO.

Cho apologising to Harry:"The interview was so brave, it made me cry" and Harry wishing that she hadnt cried over it. Ugh, this compellingly messy dynamic.

This is such a hard book for Harry. Being so afraid that you would wake up and look like Voldemort. He bites down to not make any noise during his visions, just because Seamus had recently stopped seeing him as a nutter.

Snape once again projecting on Harry - he brings up the idea that Harry seeing dreams and visions of Voldemort makes him feel "special, important". And Harry reflects it back to him, "No, that's your job, isnt it?" "That is my job." Stop your power struggle with a 15 year old Snape XD

Harry did it! He focused on Snape in between memories, and pushed him back with a protego! And Harry sees Snape memories: that imply a domestic abuse situation in his house (hook nose man shouting at a cowering woman while a boy cried in corner), a clear case of neglect (Snape shooting down flies in a room), and a sense of injured masculinity (a girl laughing at a scrawny boy's attempt to get ona bucking broomstick). Snape pushes Harry back at the last memory, and I wonder if that girl was Lily.

Snape also compliments this, "Well that's an improvement. I dont remember asking you to do a Shield Charm, but it was no doubt, effective."

The lesson end at Trelawney's screaming, Snape runs out and so does Harry. Sneaky parallel.

I really love the description of Trelawney to set the scene. My favorite descripton is her innumerable shawls were coming down from shoulders giving the impression "she is falling apart at the seams."

Dumbledore appointing Firenze is such a power move Imao.

a twinkling red star winked at him - reference to Mars, which consistently shows up in text again and again with Harry. Firenze brings attention to this, and the fact that Harry is directly under it is nice way in text to remind us there is a war coming.

"There are things more important than keeping a job" and Hagrid's hands shake. Because this job has been something he wanted, something his name was cleared for.

We get to know that Marietta's mother has been helping police Hogwarts fires, and Willy Widdershin of the regurgitating toilets was let off after he gave info on Harry.

Percy laughing at Fudge's sarcasm, and Harry for the first time expresses anger towards Percy in his internal monologue. Before he was just shocked and confused.

Kingsley modifiying Marietta's memory, to corroborate with Dumbledore's story. That man is quick. He did it immediately after Dumbledore says they can't prove 6 months worth of meetings.

ooh, it is implied that Fawkes' singing kept the four unconscious on the floor and the moment Fawkes leaves with Dumbledore, they are all awake.

Fred and George sending Montague into Vanishing Cabinet and how Montague gets out (nearly killing himself by Apparating) and gives Malfoy the information needed for the plot of HBP.

Snape the nerd, writing foot long answers. I love how much teenage Snape's body language is entirely different from adult Snape, and how much the adult Snape is a construction. Teenage Snape will lie on grass and scream hexes and swear words at you.

James literally traces and embellishes Lily's initials like a dork lol.

I deep dive into Marauder dynamics in chapter here.

"Wormtail was the only one who didnt laugh" : how cute is it that Remus laughs at his own dry joke XD

There is a strong theme of masculinity in this chapter, and James is making a performance of it with the snitch, with messing up his hair and Harry notices that this is done for the girls by the lake. (Harry wondered why James doesnt tell Wormtail to get a grip, and Sirius does it few seconds later much more unkindlyXD)

The power dynamic of the scene is framed with description of Sirius as "dog who scented a rabbit" and underlines it further by Remus' implicit disapproval (that he avoids by staring into a book, my poor bean) and Peter's anticipation (Sirius line in POA comes to mind about how Peter was drawn to the biggest bully in the playground)

Interesting note about James: he uses household spells like Scourgify for an attack. I can imagine him being similarly creative later in the Order. (it gives me such ideas of Transfiguration being his fav subject)

Interesting to me that even though both James and Sirius are on the scene, it is James Lily is consistently addressing.

Snape attempts a workshop Sectumsempra on James' cheek (clearly not the fully developed version) and James turns around and uses Snape's own spell against him. This moment alone speaks to such history in this dynamic.

Lily's "10 things I hate about you" speech is interesting because she also noticed that he was playing with the snitch (something he had nicked). She was also watching him.

Snape, emasculated by the scene, tries to exert power over one thing he has power over: his friendship with Lily. He uses Lily's otherness in wizarding world to reclaim power in the scene, and Lily throws it back at him by calling him the nickname his bullies call him and commenting on his underpants (therefore his class otherness). Utter dissolution of a friendship.

Lily channels her hurt and frustration at Snape's rejection of her onto James when he tries to help, and does a "10 things I hate about you" speech.

James tries to deal with being rejected publicly by Lily by directing his anger at Snape and threatening to take his pants off, in line with masculinity theme of this chapter.

Harry making Dudley-James associations. He will integrate a more complicated view of his father in later chapters (where he associates James with Ron), but this moment, where Harry rejects hypermasculinity displayed by James (but is keen to not reject James himself), is an important moment of moral growth for Harry.

OOTP - Chapter 29,30, 31, 32,33

Cute trip opening scene when Hermione is drawing up colour coded timetable for the boys (and nagging Harry), Ron brightening at the thought of evenings off and Crookshanks trying to get Harry's attention since he is brooding.

Harry is not only questioning James' morality, he is also questioning Sirius' ('look at what he was like himself') and Remus ('he just let it happen'). Later in the chapter, he wonders - "did he want to be like his father anymore?"

looking at Mrs Weasleys easter eggs, a handsome one with snitches on them makes Harry feel emotional. The way chocolate is tied to comfort + longing and Mrs Weasley functioning as an echo of a home.

lmao the scene where Harry admits he wants to go to Umbridge's office is peak Hermione as mum, Harry as sulky teenager and Ron as Arthur to Hermione's Molly scene.

Harry is so hypervigilant in Snape's class for his taunts, it clearly affects his performance in class. Because Snape is ignoring him, he could whip up a decent E level potion (which ofc Snape shatters).

"He attacked Snape for no good reason - well just because you said you were bored" - the apologetic tone Harry says this in and Sirius' quick "I'm not proud of it" shows how careful they are with each other. It is a big step for Sirius to admit he is not proud of his behaviour (because 2 years before, he all but snarled "served him right"), and this is the influence of Harry's distress. Remus also notes this with a "sideways glance" at him. (Remus also, something he hasn't shied away from admitting, owns his own culpability but is also harsher with himself -"did i ever tell you to lay off him?" and Sirius tries to correct/comfort that with "you made us feel ashamed of ourselves")

Harry knowing Hermione's nagging face lolll ("she fixed Harry with a beady eye and opened her mouth with a determined air") and he just interuppts before she starts lol.

hermione predicting Ron will do well without Fred and George around to watch <3

"Kind of makes you wish we had Norbert back, doesn't it?" yes, Harry. Norbert would be far preferable. I really am not sure why we have a storyline where Dumbledore sends envoys to giants so they can have them as allies (as actual thinking beings with political weight) and then write an entire chapter about how Hagrid is stupid for trying to "civilise" Grawp with English lessons. Why are you writing marginalisation like this, where you validate how "savage" Grawp is? Just a book ago, there is critique on how giants face prejudice via Hagrid and Madame Maxime, but then you're like, "maybe the prejudice has some sort of weight cos giants are brutal actually".

Cant believe we get an entire chapter of this and not Ron's victory over Slytherins and in Quidditch.

More on the giant's rant that I have and my absolute loathing for this Grawp chapter: Hagrid's Tale is one of the few times Hagrid is allowed to act as a competent adult - going with Maxime off country to send envoys to giants. For once, he is not someone the trio constantly has to take care of or save from trouble (it's not something I particularly mind, but I do have a problem here - where there is an additional layer of the fact that Hagrid hasn't had formal education. This entire chapter - he is just made a joke of and it reinforces the prejudices wizarding world shouldnt be having)

I really love the opening scene of Ron basking in the glory of having won the match, and he sits under the very same beech tree rumpling his hair, and Harry grins affectionately at being reminded of his father. It shows that Harry is beginning to integrate parts of his father - from seeing him as Dudley at end of SWM to seeing Ron-like qualities in him.

Cho crying out of temper and kicking her broom away after Gryffindor won the match : what a competitive streak. Love it.

"Hagrid's monster mates" - once again, the narrative needs to pick what giants are meant to be.

Griselda Marchbanks, the one who resigned from Wizengamot in protest against the High Inquistor appointment, is apparently friends with Neville's gran. Daily Prophet snidely said she had links with "subversive goblin groups".

Harold Dingle and his powdered dragon claw and Eddie Carmichael and his brain stimulant trade XD

also ron mothering Hermione asking her to eat a decent meal so she can have good sleep <3

ooh, Hermione wondering if she did justice on Cheering Charms (its the lesson she missed in POA when she lost track of time). I wonder if not attending the actual class makes her feel nervous, and not like she had enough time with the information.

Umbridge's "nasty smile" when she sees Harry's patronus in DADA exam: a hint towards her actual involvement in sending Dementors after Harry.

The confrontation between Hagrid, Umbridge and McGonagall is beautifully written. Really love the atmosphere here with the use of lights from the castle, the hut, the moon over the darkness of the lawn to set up the mood of the scene. The moment McGonagall was lit by the stunning spells sent at her? Eerie.

Harry staring at Parvati's hair while sleep-deprived in history exam cos there was something gold in it. He sure likes shiny hair.

there is a question in history of magic exam about how legislation of wand: whether it better controlled the goblin riots in 18th century. The politics of this is brought up in Deathly Hallows, where griphook brings up how wizards have denied other creatures rights of expanding their magical powers by refusing to share wandlore.

Harry's sheer blinding panic and fear in this chapter hurts to read.

I actually really love how bad the communication is between Harry and Hermione in this chapter. Where, in her desperation to stop him, she calls out his "saving the people thing" in an effort to make him understand that Voldemort's playing into an instinct in Harry, and Harry obviously feels stupid about the way she calls it out and thinks she is criticising it as a an attention seeking thing. It makes him less sympathetic to her appeal that it could be a trap, but the scene anyway ends with him conceding to check with her and recognising her offer to come with him to Umbridge's office as "mark of loyalty."

Kreacher's hands are injured cos he injured Buckbeak. There was a lovely Tumblr post I read about this moment, about how combination of Sirius' indifferent cruelty (towards kreacher) and love (for Buckbeak, Harry) is what pushed him towards the events of his death. It perfectly captures his duality.

The conversation between Snape and Umbridge is hilarious. Snape offering his sympathies to Umbridge in case she wanted to poison Harry ("venoms act too fast to give victims time for truth telling"), the ironic bow before he leaves and telling Crabbe to loosen his hold on Neville because if he suffocates, there will be "lots of tedious paperwork" LOL.

Harry noticing that Hermione was not really crying immediately, and knowing that she is scheming XD These two will be a force in the Ministry. Imagine Harry looking at Hermione trapping someone ina courtroom and being like, "yeah, saw that one a mile away. Sucks to be you buddy."

Man, Hermione is having quite a day. Her inexperience with a plan she is making up as she goes along showed, as well as her putting her foot in her mouth. Umbridge is a threat she has known and assessed well, the centaurs, less so. She will grow from this in DH, when she makes bigger elaborate plans with failsafes on the spot. (For example, the Lovegoods escape)

Ginny being astonished that a herd of centaurs left Harry and Hermione behind - suggesting familiarity with the centaur ways. Interesting character note! (also how her and Luna also clearly pay attention in Care of Magical Creatures, as they both remind the trio of Thestral traits - that they are good for finding places riders are looking for, and Harry and Hermione being covered in blood will lure more of them). I wouldnt have paid attention to this detail without @whinlatter lovely WIP "Beasts".

Chapter 34, 35,36,37,38

Proof of Ron, Hermione and Ginny's loyalty and gutsiness: they are willing to ride an invisible horse for hours in the air to help Harry. (also Luna is so cute, sitting all in side saddle)

Harry thinking the veil had a strange beauty to it, and that he felt a strong inclination to walk through it is an indication of his fascination with death. He isn't the only one: Luna, Neville, Ginny are all similarly entranced. Only Ron and Hermione are not and they drag everyone away.

Sirius' knife, Harry's gift is melted by the Love Room in Department of Mysteries :(

Ginny wanting to watch the bird's progress is so cute. Such a lovely detail - I never noticed this interest in creatures before. But she consistently thinks in terms of animals, she even thought the brains they initially saw were fish. ("his eyes are as green as fresh pickled toad" anyone?)

how interesting that the Prophecy Hall is beyond the room full of Time-Turners.

interesting note of how some prophecies having liquid glow (Harry's felt warm as he touched it) and how some prophecies were blown out like a night bulb. Could indicate that the events they had foretold have come to pass etc.

I love during the entire conversation with Death Eaters, you can feel Harry being hypervigilant. He notices the shifts in Bellatrix speaking and makes decisions - once he speaks Voldemort's name, he holds the prophecy tighter because given that he riled her, he expected an attempt to take it from him. And then of course, he is very "improvise. adapt. overcome" with the plan to smash shelves.

Harry's athleticism shines in these chapters where he is elbowing and ducking around Death Eater attacks, launching himself on top of them, heaving Ron when he is out and flinging him when he needs to help the others, rolling over tables to get to doors quick XD

Neville kicking aside fragments of his father's old wand when he carries Hermione. It's his "I'm gonna be my own person not defined by my father's legacy" moment, a parallel to Harry's own in this book.

I love the tiny detail that Tonks is above on the steps, firing spells down at Bellatrix. The distance she keeps, and the detail of Bellatrix and Andromeda resembling each other to the point they could be mistaken for each other, adds such a layer to this detail.

Sirius and Bellatrix are so caught up in their battle that they dont even notice that Dumbledore had arrived. Speaks to their personal history and intensity of their duel.

Harry's child-like denial is utterly heartbreaking. The way he thinks that Remus doesn't understand because he had heard whispers behind the veil, and surely people are hiding there, and that Sirius is just hiding. It is the most child-like he has been and it breaks my heart.

Remus' voice breaking as he struggled to contain Harry, speaking as though every word caused him pain, or just not being able to look at the veil:(

The moment Harry is angry that Sirius would keep him waiting. It is such a childish, entitled reaction. The boy who never expects anything from his adult figures feels like he has the space to be mad at Sirius for keeping him waiting - and then realises, that Sirius would never keep him waiting. And that's how he knows Sirius is dead.

Harry laughing at Bellatrix right after Sirius' death ("a mad laugh to match her own"): the boy really is his godfather's godson.

Bellatrix loves Voldemort, but also fears Voldemort. The moment he comes - Sirius turns from the mocking "dear cousin" to "Animagus Black." She is super keen to distance herself from Sirius in front of him and it calls to the scene later in Deathly Hallows, where she claims she never laid eyes on Andromeda after she ran away.

"We both know there are other ways of destroying a man. Merely taking your life would not satisfy me, I must admit" - contrast this with Deathly Hallows, where Dumbledore leads Harry away from Voldemort's maimed soul in the limbo. Harry feels pity for it, and even tries to save Voldemort, but Dumbledore is beyond that and this scene conveys it.

"And I'll see Sirius again.." it's not only Harry's love for Sirius that drives Voldemort out of his body, but it is also his very raw desire for death. Something he wishes once again, when he is at his parents' graves. (it is this passive ideation that Hermione grasps at the grave and why Harry's desire for Resurrection Stone terrifies her)

"You've been chasing the wrong man for 12 months, it's time you listened to sense!" Dumbledore's feelings of Sirius' fate are also encapsulated in this line. He claims responsibility for Sirius' fate next chapter, but his anger and guilt at Sirius' death is clear here.

Harry's intense guilt and hatred for himself, where he had never before wished he was someone else so intensely, that he was trapped inside his body and mind. It is this guilt, even though he expresses them this chapter, that he will carry with him in HBP and it will come out in moments like strangling Mundungus for perceived disrespect to Sirius.

"I know how you're feeling Harry" "No you dont" : it is both Harry lashing out his intense self-hatred, but also his feelings of abandonment. In his mind, if Dumbledore understood his feelings, he would not have "abandoned" him through the summer or the year. So this moment of Dumbledore reaching out in solidarity after a year of freezing him out makes Harry angry.

Harry just demolishing his office, and Dumbledore remaining calm and detached through it, until Harry himself matches Dumbledore's tone to let him out. Such a well written scene.

The chapter is good illumination of how Dumbledore's distance/detachment and big picture thinking and how it hurts people: Dumbledore locking Sirius and Harry up (Harry shouting this back at him must be a painful reminder of his time with his sister), Snape not overcoming his feelings ("some wounds run too deep for healing").

"I alone could prevent this, and I alone must be strong" - How Dumbledore rationalises his decisions, the weight of the guilt he carries, the calculations he must make. # war general.

"He saw himself in you before he had ever seen you": Voldemort destroying everyone and everything that reminds him of who he is. Strange likenesses from Voldemort is not a compliment, when he wants to be extraordinary, special and unique.

Harry thinking that if only he had just pulled back the veil, he would have seen Sirius greeting him with a laugh like a bark :(

Dumbledore trying to repair Harry's feelings of abandonment by telling him why he didn't choose Harry as a prefect.

Fred and George sending Ron mountains of Chocolate frog after the Ministry fiasco to express their care, in a book where they were harder on him is <3

Ah, that subtle implication that Harry spent hours by the lake, crying about his godfather until the sunset. :( It is gorgeously subtle writing - him getting up at sunset, and wiping his face on his sleeve.

The way the book twists our innards with Harry opening Sirius' gift. :( and how Harry hopes again, and when the hope shatters, he throws the mirror. But it is the very same mirror shard, Sirius' gift that will enable Dobby to help the trio out of the manor, where Harry would ask for help because he saw a parental figure's eye (Dumbledore).

Luna validating Harry's feeling that they were just lurking out of sight, behind the veil and it is this connection with death and understanding of afterlife that comforts Harry. That he will see Sirius again.

#hp reread #ootp #harry james potter #sirius black #ron weasley #hermione granger #ginny weasley

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strawbubbysugar · 2 months

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So i know the alien au is with a plus sized y/n this time and honestly i love that it not too common is most aus. But that make me curious. About the other aus. So like soul and such would it change the dynamics at all if y/n was plus sized

And another version of this question. What if they had an eating disorder themselves (my mother is plus sized but it happened due to a surgery and she actually has an eating disorder it's not a eating to much thing but actually a not eating enough. (Not saying you can be big and not having an eating disorder and such I'm more curious about reactions then just straight up judging. I do apologize of it's offended anyone that was not.y intent)) how would they react if they had an eating disorder

It wouldnt change the dynamics at all if those characters were plus sized :) They could look like anything or anyone and the stories would still work the same. I dont like people's appearances to be deciding factors in their lives. How you look is how you look, that should be the end of it. (save for plot points about resembling family members, lmao.) When the romantic interest in these stories talk about how beautiful they are/how attractive they find them, its based on their own personal preference- not an objective beauty.

June I write to be a bit of a prettyboy, and Dahmia is also quite attractive in how I depict her, but both of them aren't attractive in the same way as a model. I want them to feel real, like people you'd meet out in your day to day life, not some unattainable god-hood status of drop your panties hot.

I'm personally not comfortable depicting eating disorders just for the sake of reactions. I dont like equating bigger people just to their size, and I wont be drawing anything or answering any asks that talk about why they're plus sized/eating disorders/etc. They just are! It isnt important to their character or to the story. At the very most, I will show sun's interest in a creature that is healthy and well fed (rather than how he is, starving) but that would be the same plus sized y/n or not

As a plus sized person, it just makes me uncomfortable when my body type is only ever talked about in relation to how the world sees me/how disordered I may be over it. I dont think the difference in how a thin person/fat person is treated should be any different than blonde vs brunette. If I were to give a character an eating disorder, I would want to handle it with a lot more depth & seriousness than id be able to provide with a little doodle of their romantic interest reacting to it. To me, that sort of thing is more important as a personal struggle & something that should be depicted thoughtfully

#ask #/nm #tag just in case #i wanna make sure you know im not upset! Just wanted to clarify some things :)

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aita-blorbos · 8 months

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my friends directed me to this blog to see what people would think about my situation. theyre fully supportive, but wanna see what tumblr thinks, i guess.

aita for killing the person who murdered my family, and then killing my rich abusive adoptive father?

hi. im like, 19. or 20. i lost count. i dont care about gender, but i guess im male and use he/him. anyway. when i was around 10, there was a break and enter into my house. we were getting robbed. the robber killed my mom and dad, while i snuck into the kitchen do grab a kitchen knife. i stabbed him in the back and took his gun while he was stunned. i was scared to use it, so instead i just kept stabbing him until he stopped breathing. great childhood, i know.

anyway, after that, i was all alone. i didnt know where my brother went, and my parents were dead. we didnt really have an extensive family, so there were no funerals, and there was no one to take care of me. so for a while i just roamed the streets. some random guy saw me, and seeing a kid covered in blood probably isnt the most normal thing, so he ran up to ask if i was ok. he brought me to an orphanage, where i stayed for a while. eventually, my second "dad" (i dont even want to call him that. hes a disgrace compared to my real father, even calling him a parent feels disrespectful) came to the orphanage to adopt a kid. said kid was me. i was happy, cause id finally have a home again, and he was rich! i would be spoiled, and given a wonderful life for the trauma i had to go through.

i was wrong, though. the guy who adopted me was a prick. he was a rich scumbag who only thought about others if it meant he could say bad things about them. he was negligent, and would sometimes hit me. he got drunk all the time, and usually i was left alone in his huge house, only having the occasional housemaid to care for me. whenever i see pictures of the interiors of huge houses or mansions it gives me chills. anyway, after all this bullshit, i finally thought enough was enough. i still carried a few knives on me ever since the incident, in case something bad happened again. at night when no one except the two of us were in the house, i stabbed him in the heart while he was sleeping. i took all his money, and figured if worst comes to worst, i could pay my way out of being punished for murder. fortunately, that wasnt even necessary. when i called 911 pretending like i had no idea what happened, none of the officers even touched me. no one had a clue i had the weapon. it was eventually ruled down to a robber that got away, ironically enough.

after all this, i inherited all of his shit. all the money, the whole house, and all his stupid rich guy bullshit (think yachts, fancy cars). it was all mine. i turned the house into a housing unit, letting anyone who wanted to to live in it (like the homeless or people who needed to get away from an abusive household), given how huge it was. seriously, it felt like a palace in a disney movie. i sold all the shit he had that i didnt care about, or gave it away for free to others. i donate frequently to charity. i make sure i dont keep too much money for myself at a time, and i dont buy stupid things that i dont actually need. i dont want to become like him.

alright, so heres the final question. i know some people think murder is unacceptable, no matter how evil the victim is, that my parents may be watching me from the stars with hatred, and that rich peolle are assholes. but im trying my best to be a good person.

am i the asshole?

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality #child abuse #child neglect

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gwendalyn · 8 months

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Girlhood Pt.1

Hermione x Reader Fem!

I’ve always had a crush on Hermione so I wanted to write a fic between reader and Hermione. It’s more of a friends to lovers story, but doesn’t exceed into a relationship yet. Just bonding with one another as being surrounded by boys and connecting over girlhood.

I sat down at the table. Harry, Ron, Neville, Seamus, Dean, Fred, George. Then Hermione. So I sat across from her. Today was just one of those days where everything seems to go wrong and you just want to either scream as loud as you can or curl up in a ball and cry your eyes out. I decided to go to dinner instead, since I hadn’t eaten all day. Hermione looked at me with concern as I rest my head in my hands for a few seconds. “You okay?” She mouths as I look up, and I nod. She didn’t seem convinced though.

Then I help myself to food. My hands shaky, I pick up a slice of pie, that then falls off the serving utensil. And I’m not sure why that was the final straw. But it was. I try my hardest to hold back the tears that wanted to expell out my eyes. But they came, alongside sobs. The boys at the table looked at me with confusion, but sympathy. But only Hermione knew what was going on. She got up and went around the table to sit next to me, as the boys watched in confusion. Then she held onto my arm and helped me up as we walk out of the great hall. I find it impossible not to sob, even though I feel embarrassed by doing so. I notice everyone staring at me as I sob. My eyes strained and my face just damp with tears.

Hermione speedily walks us out of the room to somewhere private as she knew the feeling. When we get there she just says nothing and hugs me. I hold onto her sobbing. Then I look up and shes starting to tear up herself.

“I’m sorry.” I tell her.

“Don’t be. I’ve been needing a cry recently.” She says with a slight chuckle with a shaky voice from her crying.

“Did anything happen or is it just one of those days?” Hermione asked.

“Just one of those days. Can’t get my hair right, my tie isnt going right. I forget everything. I stumble over myself. Everything is overwhelming. But on top of the usual with Snape taunting me in class because I kept dropping things.” I tell her.

“Arsehole!” She practically yells, referring to Snape. We both laugh at that before she looks at me.

“And I think you look great today. Seriously.” She says with a smile.

“You’re just saying that because you’re kind.” I say, thinking I look a mess.

“No seriously. You look beautiful. I promise.” Hermione tells me.

A wide smile forms on my face.

“See look, a pretty smile to go along with it!” She says.

We look at each other for a few seconds, before I glance back into the Great hall, seeing if anyone was still watching, or hoping they had forgotten. Hermione glances to see too.

“Boys.” She scoffs, aggrivated that they were clueless to what was going on.

“Hey. Don’t worry about it. They’re clueless. They’re probably just talking about the Quidditch match on saturday. And if they do say anything, I’ll sort them out. Don’t worry about them.” She says.

“I hope you know I’ll do the same for you.” I tell her.

“Sometimes I just feel like I don’t even like boys that way. Because how do they not understand emotion past the level of basic emotional intelligence. It really has me questioning myself.” Hermione says.

“I’ll be honest, I’ve never liked any boy that way for that exact reason. Maybe out there there’s one. But even then I dont know.” I tell her.

She smiles at me.

“We should just run off to the woods together and setup a society of only girls. I’m sure we would both be much happier without boys at our side.” Hermione jokes, only slightly though. Because we both wanted that to be real.

“We could get married and have a little forest wedding.” I jokingly but not jokingly suggest.

“Please! That would be perfect.” Hermione says.

Even though it was a joke between us, I longed for that to be real. I could practically see the forest and the little treehouse we would live in. Then I picture Hermione. Smiling at me before she leans in to kiss me underneath the trees. I saw us in love, running through the confetti all the other women throw at us after we marry, and just having comfort in one another.

I had never thought about anyone like this. Especially no boy. I come back into the zone, and notice Hermione smiling at me. Sadly it wasn’t followed up by a kiss like I had just imagined.

‘Sadly?’ I think to myself. I realised I wanted Hermione to kiss me. Or I wanted to kiss her. Either way. I just wanted to lock lips with her.

“You ready to go back out, or do you wanna stay here. Or we could hang out in our room.” Hermione suggests. I like the third option.

“Lets go to our room. I think I just need to chill.” I tell Hermione.

“Ok, let me just get my stuff from in there, I’ll get yours too.” Hermione says.

“No, I’ll help you.” I insist.

She smiles at me before we walk back in together.

“Just going back to our room. See you guys.” Hermione says.

“Oh um. Okay.” Harry says

“Bye.” Ron says confused.

We walk off together laughing with all our things and holding hands.

#hermione granger #hermione x reader #hermione x reader fem #hermione #hermione sapphic

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savingyou · 2 years

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Okay to preface: I’m a trans man and this is my opinion, and if you disagree or want to call me transphobic please go away and never come back and also look up the definition of “opinion” because it will help you.

I think Dean Winchester is trans and here’s why:

In the pilot episode we see a picture of young Dean, John, and young Sam, both wearing hats and plaid and sitting on the Impala. Dean is shown with shoulder length black hair and this is my first piece of evidence for trans!Dean.

Now, i know that boys can have long hair and I have seen plenty of little boys with long hair. Dean looks to be 12 in the picture, and both John and Sam have short hair. So we know they can afford haircuts (or are at least able to get them) and while Dean may have just styled his hair like this, i think that it was long because he wasn’t out yet.

The picture in question:

The next picture i want to talk about is this one:

Which shows us pre-series Dean also had longer hair but he looks much more masculine in this picture than in the previous one. This fake ID, along with a few others are more evidence for me. Dean has a fake drivers license where the sex reads female, and while thats probably a typo, we know that Dean and Sam’s fake IDs have been good enough to fool hundreds of people, so they have to be good fake IDs - meaning typos shouldn’t happen.

Also in the pilot episode, a cop asks Dean “you have anything that’s real?” And Dean jokingly replies “My boobs.”

And while i know that this line is intended as a joke, i also know that Dean uses humor to tell the truth sometimes. He will joke about something when he can’t talk seriously about it. We see examples of this all over season one, when Sam is grieving Jess. But as a trans person myself i also joke about my chest (to an extent, i personally dont like to bring attention to it), and it’s in Dean’s character to do that too. (I also want to mention that if i had just finished healing from top surgery and someone asked me that question i would probably say the same thing, just because its fun to finally say you dont have boobs anymore - and i also think dean got top surgery immediately pre-series, which is another reason for him to be away from John for so long and to have “lost” him)

During the three first seasons, we never see Dean’s naked chest - i believe there’s only one time in season 3 during Mystery Spot where we see his shoulder in the shower, but not his chest - which i think could be a way to hide top surgery scars. It’s only after he comes back to life in season 4 that we see his naked chest, where he’s confused by the absence of (hellhound) scars because Castiel healed him - also this could be a place where you could say Dean got bottom surgery, i.e., Castiel gave him a dick/fully functioning biologically male genitalia.

In season 4, the episode “Monster Movie” he says he’s been “re-hymenated” which is another joke, but also I don’t know of a single man who knows what a hymen actually is, much less a man who would actually say that to convey his virginity status.

Also the way the man dresses. I mean, he’s so hyper masculine that it feels like an extreme overcorrection. I did the same thing when i came out. He wears plaid, henleys, and jeans under big leather and army jackets. The man wears layers like he’s hiding three tits under there.

For the sex argument, all i have to say is toys (or the aforementioned holy bottom surgery). If Dean wants to fuck someone he can wear a strap on. Its not that difficult. We never see him naked below the waist so he could be wearing one, you dont know. Also does it matter what his genitals really look like? No. We never see them so its all just speculation.

I know dean isnt trans in canon because he’s fathered a child (Emma in season 7) and apparently the explanation of magic doesn’t explain how that can be possible between two biological women (eggs and uteruses).

Anyway. There are plenty of reasons that Dean can be trans. Sorry this was so long. I posted something similar to this and someone thought i was being transphobic i guess? So i wanted to try again with the added preface of “this is my opinion/headcanon and you dont have to think I’m right” to hopefully deter people from saying I’m being insensitive.

So yeah trans Dean, i love it and i wish the cw or any tv network had the guts to actually do that, even if the actor is cis, i dont care i just want a trans character. Thank you and good night

#supernatural #dean winchester #trans headcanon #trans dean winchester #trans man #headcanon #this is just my opinion

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gwinaifen · 4 months

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why yall be out here on tumblr and twt n say dumb shit 🤦‍♀️ im pissed. some of yall arent meant for the real world if u still think heterophobia exists. these bitches crawling all over twitter especially. most of yall so grown but act like children and its always on twitter too. ?????? less crying more job finding. and dont get me started on those neet stay at home weebs who dehumanize women bc the only kind of women they see are in animes. ☠ and no straight people will ever truly understand how hard it is being gay why the fuck do u guys water down our struggles so much. at least ur considered fucking normal why cant u be fucking grateful for that and leave those "i hate straight ppl /srs" queers as stepping on shit. wipe it off on dry concrete and move the fuck on. but dont tell us to do the same because you know we arent treated normally no matter how open minded people have become by the years. theres still millions, or. billions of people opposing to us. is it the same to yall? probably like, only 10 people genuinely hate straight people in this world. "i hate gay people /srs" is like an anvil dropped on you. everyday a queer or trans person gets harassed verbally and physically just for being the way they are. be fucking grateful you're straight and you dont experience this thing. fuck you. homophobia and "heterophobia" struggles will never be equal. because the latter isnt real. so idk what to tell yall. again fuck u if u seriously think heterophobia is real. im taking that shit as fucking mockery to real homophobia that actually happens everyday. be fucking grateful ur naturally inlove with the opposite gender

#angel's rants #heterophobia isnt real 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌#i said what i said #yall never went thru smth like queer ppl did stop acting fucking oppressed #yall r considered the norm and we've been oppressed since like... forever and yall choose to do this. ??#if yall see one gay person say they hate straight people then u havent seen thousands of other homophobes supporting harassment to lgbt 💀#has there been a case of a straight person getting harassed just for being straight? neva heard of it 🤷‍♀️#stop acting oppressed. yall know yall are normal and common but we arent. fuck you seriously like fuck you i hate you #i didnt choose to be lesbian did i?#no straight person would choose to be gay only to be harassed on the daily #fuck you #also kind of vent :| being gay isnt fun most of the time and these “heterophobia!!!!” people makes it worse #if u really fucking oppose to this go n kys

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punkbxt · 10 months

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dime the takes. por favor.

*gets real close to the vending machine* quiero pepsi

okay all seriousness tho imma try to do this in a way thats like idk semi respectful towards janeway but i also need yall to know i do NOT reallyf fuck with her. idk if ive explained why before but i guess here we go

unlike most people that enjoy star trek i didnt really get into it till 2018 and then the demmy hit n i had nothing but time to consume every star trek imaginable and thats how i found voyager. yeah sure make fun of me for not knowing what star trek is but i need YALL to know that it is white and usamerican culture to be raised on trek and I DONT CARE. the only reason i got into star trek is bc a white friend introduced me. all this to say i was introduced to janeways actress through oitnb red ilu so much red best evil white lady <3

anyways i know janeway gets hate for having been the only lady captain and i always preface anything i say about her with this so yall understand that this is not the reason i dislike her but in reality it doesnt help either

also its tiring as fuck to include my opposing argument but it has to be done bc ppl are like “what about- pkay but you didnt consider how- yeah but- actually youre wrong bc-“ like fuck man im doing my damndest i literally hate voicing my opinions bc yall INSIST people of color dont actually get it n its tiring

if youve followed me since i started voyagerposting you may have noticed ive only actually drawn janeway twice and its cuz as a person she rubs me the wrong way for so many reasons

janeway gets put in this impossible position of being the top of the hierarchy pyramid to a crew that doesnt think theyll ever make it home again. shes deemed a mother figure by a LOT of characters but im gonna talk abt her dynamics with b’elanna, and seven because if i were to talk about the dynamics between janeway and harry thatd have to be its own post

when i get into a show, i loooveeee knowing what was happening behind the scenes because i love it!! i love set design i love character design i love costume design i love seeing what the actors are like outside of the show and how they feel about these characters bc these things ARE important. (writers too pero i have beef) behind the scenes is the biggest influence to the final product bc its the reason the final product exists in the first place and behind the scenes so many things went wrong. and when actors are mistreated or dont get along with eachother it becomes pretty apparent. well at least if you analyze things the way i do

so heres my issue with janeway seven and b’elanna. b’elanna is typecast to be the ugly character. klingons gave always gotten the short end of the stick and the case with her isnt as harsh bc her actress is a mixed puerto rican (information that has actually only recently been revealed bc when i tried to find out what roxan’s ethnicity was in 2019 i literally could not find anything definitive except for shes latina) but she STILL gets a lot of shit

one of my favorite things about voyager before the introduction of seven was how b’elanna and janeway actually got to bond a lot over science and when seven took on the roll of pretty girl on the ship, b’elanna and janeway suffered a LOT for it. we have an interesting dynamic between a maquis engineer and a federation captain genuinely not getting along bc b’elanna doesnt see janeways as an authority figure. not until chakotay has something to say about it and also until b’elanna and janeway actually talk about shit n get over their differences. the issue is when ppl purposely skip the earlier seasons to get to seven and then a lot of important interpersonal character building is missed I SAY THIS BC PEOPLE OFTEN FORGET THAT VOYAGER HAS BEEN ASSIMILATED BY THE BORG BEFORE AND EVEN THE WRITERS LET IT SLIP THEUR MIND N ITS LIKE BRO U HAVE GOLD TO WRITE WITH N U JUST LET IT COLLECT IN THE CORNER

seven is a unique and interesting character when she is first introduced. seven looks like any other borg and is so COOL. and then immediately all the cool interesting things about the way seven looks is basically negated to a few shiny parts. and yes janeway is partly to blame

BUT! what is the easiest way to gain the trust of people who already have bad history with who you once were? assimilation of course! seven goes from being one of many to the outcasts outcast

but punkbxt! what does any of this have to do with why you dislike janeway as a character? if anything it sounds more like you dislike seven. as long as the character is white ill always hold a lil disdain for them in my heart <3

janeway symbolizes the best of starfleet. she is an accredited officer and an extremely capable scientist. she is a beautiful white woman in THE position of power something that was revolutionary for her time. the issues with white women being put in positions of power is they they have NEVER had the interests of black and brown people to heart. “yes they-“ SHUT UP and let me speak before you decide to comment on this goddamn post

feminism throughout the centuries has focused on white women and while a show is merely a fraction of the lived reality of its time the effects are still extremely clear. white feminism JUMPED at the character of janeway and celebrated her and rightfully so! the issues came about when women like b’elanna got attacked and pushed to the side. this directly affected janeway within fandom and she got and still is recognized for accomplishments SHE DID NOT DO. she got put on a pedestal and once that happens to a character they suddenly can do no wrong. except she does because shes a human and shes white and shes a character with writers behind her

b’elanna has never actually been a super popular character and the wave of love for her is actually pretty fucking recent and not to toot my own horn but i definitely was a big part of the b’elanna love resurgence. when i got into voyager and these dates ARE important, i used to scroll through her entire tag easily a couple times through a DAY. fans occasionally created art for her and yeah! she got fics but nowhere in comparison to her other peers. surrounding yourself with people who also love her and want to create for her does help with recognition of b’elanna but its super recent stuff. and to add onto that any white fan that has an opinion about her will always be biased because they just do not understand what it is like to exist as a latina woman of color

this is where me myself and i come into the story because wowowowowow star trek is so cool! star trek preaches on and on and on about diversity love acceptance hate oppression and all that good stuff so who wouldnt love it??? and then??? OMG THERES A LATINA CHARACTER IN ONE SERIES OMG OMG OMG. imagine my disappointment when i found out that she a main character barely was getting any love. it hurt. because even within a narrative of inclusion somehow characters of color just seem to always be pushed to the side. especially when a fandom has such a majority percentage of white people

watching her story was SO personal to me. i could see myself in her struggling with living in america. i lived my childhoods in puerto rico and in many different parts of usamerica, surrounded by family and people like me until that wasnt the case anymore. i spent my life living as a nomad with no place to call home for on average no less than a year and no more than three. i could understand b’elanna with her struggles of living in a klingon monastery and then being thrust into an unforgiving and unaccepting world where humans/white people are the most important. the internalized racism that i grew up with was horrendous and to this DAY i am still trying to learn and better myself and connect with my culture in any way i can. because in a black ans white world, where is the space for those of us that dont fall under either? we are ignored and erased and with b’elanna is has been the same

the rejection b’elanna had to her klingon side was something i could relate to incredibly. but it still isnt enough. because even though i could connect with her through her klingon-ness, her latinidad is simply a label. throughout the show you see her change and grow and assimilate to the federation standard and it HURT. the narrative that i was directly picking up from her story was yeah you can be a part of the club but only if you do it how we want you to do it. and dont you EVER even talk about being latino unless its to shit on your deadbeat of a father. and i did. i learned how to adapt at an extremely young age. ive been told its one of the things i do best (sad isnt it?)

and okay how do seven and janeway have anything to do with this? well they are the white women who we literally have to conform to and for. thats it period

seven as a character had an amazing opportunity to challenge gender and sexuality because of her story (one that would have been better suited had she been an indigenous woman which ive spoken on before but thats for another post too) and then the people in charge decided that she just HAD to be the sexywoman instead of leaning into just how much she was no longer human and how humanity itself doesnt actually have one right way to be

this narrative is given to us by janeway time and time and time again correcting seven and telling her that seven simply is not himan enough and still has to learn. (things autistic ppl can suuuuuper relate to which is a reason i could connect with seven at all). no matter how you want to look at it (whatever canon you want to decide isnt canon anymore for the sake of a fucking ship) janeway was directly written to be a mentor and mother figure to seven. janeway is there to help her learn when in reality she can never understand what its like to be an outcast within the federation and to take it a step further be part of a eace which is treated with hostility by humans. something b’elanna CAN understand and relate to because at the time of voyager shits still om the rocks between klingons and humans. janeway pushes seven to accept and embrace humanity as if thats the only option seven has to become a better character but its just not true. the story woven between janeway and seven is one of white women and femininity and how to be the perfect white woman and how to be a good lover. by actively ignoring the help and influence b’elanna could have provided for seven to learn and adapt to a majority human world they put all that weight on janeway. something that affects ALL three of them negatively and results in a narrative of “well b’elanna could never understand and relate to seven in a way that matters” which is beyond true because they are so interwoven even unintentionally so. it simply just wasnt taken further and its a true shame

and this isnt even touching on how badly seven’s actress was treated by janeways actress for being the pretty new doll at the time of filming and how that affected how i felt about janeway/seven as a ship (similarly how castle and beckett did not get along behind scenes i could no longer enjoy that show anymore)

i simplified this IMMENSELY and this shit is already long enough as it is so im sorry about that but yeah thats it. also sorry if things got repetitive ive been told i tend to do that when i write. these are my feelings and i am a real human behind this account so keep in mind how you react to this post. i have recieved countless hate anons most of which ive deleted throughout my short lived time as a fan of this franchise. i used to be MUCH more vocal about representation within star trek and people got mad so i left. but im back because the people that love b’elanna and that love that i have things to say about her matter so much fucking more than any angry person ever will

#to add a lil statistics to it b7 barely breaks 200 fics on ao3 and numbers like that classify them rarepair within a fandom as big as trek #AND I BARELY TOUCH ON THE SHIPPING ASPECT TOO LOL #b’elanna torres #seven of nine #captain janeway #star trek voyager

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jefferythejelly · 2 months

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ok more kidfic: do u have any pregnancy hcs? Especially for Foolish bc I've only rarely seen him as a dad :3

u have no idea what u've just unleashed 90% of the brainrot bulletpoint list i have for this au is pregnancy headcanons asjdfadkjs

this is like 90% just copy pasted from that bulletpoint list and slightly edited and also i've had this document since may of last year and have been slowly adding on to it every once in a while since then so FAIR WARNING this post is Quite Long

they try decorating the nursery themselves but neither of them know what to get or how to make it cute so then foolish calls up tina who eventually just makes them call up an interior designer XD

can you imagine them telling their friends abt it. can u imagine how cute auntie tina would be. she would be taking it so serious like she doesnt want any of the responsibility but she wants to be like the cool aunt y'know

random tidbit but i can so imagine a conversation between tina and foosh where they start talkin about the phrase "buns in the oven." like i think tina would think that phrase is really cute. i think that phrase is really cute tbh. hes got buns in the oven :>

following in the vein of nervous-but-excited-newly-pregnant-couple them going to foolish's prenatal care appointments and taking his health like super seriously. also ultrasounds. i dont think either of them would Cry cry but theyd maybe get a little teary eyed lookin at their kids for the first time

on some more classic omegaverse bullshit: punz had always been a bit possessive/protective as a partner and that very much continues once theyre mates and foolish is pregnant. like really frequently is holding his hand or has an arm around him, tries to be really doting and get him whatever he asks. not as common when theyre in public but one of his fave things to do is hug foolish from behind with his hands on his stomach

i'd imagine they have a few arguments esp when foolish is hormonal and does/says shit that annoys punz and he cant understand why. they work it out tho, bc they love each other <3

in the time leading up to foolish's due date his nesting instincts go crazy. theres nests everywhere in the whole house. when hes not sitting chilling in a nest hes making a new one or readjusting one

(this one is real long bc it is a vaguely drafted out scene oops) foolish's water breaks on stream/at least when he's in vc on someone else's stream bc like. i deffo think it would. u think this man would take a break? like the streams would get shorter especially as his hormones and instincts get more fucky but he would still be trying to be on that grindTM. and (bcuz this is the part i actually vaguely researched) he's been having like the irregular not actually real contractions (theres a name im forgetting it rn) so hes gotten used to just like feeling them, noting when the time is, and brushing it off when it doesnt happen again. so he's in vc with someone, i'm thinking tina lets just say tina, and he's in the middle of laughing really hard at a joke, but abruptly cuts off his windexing when he feels the whole "rush of fluid" thing and is all like o_o and tina's all like "foolish? you okay?" when he stops laughing like that and foolish is like "uh. i think my water just broke?" which makes tina go all "wait What?! like- like the baby's coming?" "yeah" "foolish!" (chat is freaking out. monkaS monkaW fukW) "shouldnt you like, go to the hospital?" "yeah, uh, bye chat!" (chat has been yelling at him since he said his water broke to end stream) he yells for punz who ofc comes rushing into the room like "whats going on do you need something" and when foolish tells him his water just broke he starts freaking out a little and then foolish has a contraction right then (is that realistic timing tbh its been a while since i did that google search. what i do remember is that theres apparently apps for timing contractions like isnt that neat. anyways) but then theyre like "sorry tina bye!" and then tinas like "good luck!" (is that a normal thing to say idk. even if it isnt it could be funny hashtag awkward girl swag /affectionate) and then they like drive to the hospital and stuff

i just have this image of like the night they come back from the hospital both of them in their nest with the babies laying between them oughhhhhh

listen i just think this is really cute but punz sitting on the edge of the hospital bed while foolish is in labor so he can lean into him and calm down with his scent

actually thought abt it a bit more and mayb this is more general omegaverse hcs but like i think omegas would have an instinct to give birth in a nest which obv is harder to do while also having the support of modern medicine in a hospital but maybe it is more normalized to bring some blankets/pillows/clothes/what have you to make a lil temporary nest in the hospital bed

foolish is way more absentminded/no thoughts head empty than usual (like forgets what hes saying in the middle of a sentence bad) bc of fucked up hormones pregnancy brain

he tries having one or two blankets wrapped around him on stream to be sort of like a temporary nest when his instincts start going wacky. sometimes it works sometimes he accidentally gets too sleepy and begrudgingly admits that he should probably end stream bc he can barely think thru the omega nesting instinct brain fog

actually on that note i think there a couple of times where punz basically forces him to take a break from streaming. it never lasts very long

i have decided that the timing of their baby is such that foolish is like 7/8 months when christmas rolls around bc i was at family christmas brainrotting what it would be like for them to have like cute domestic family christmas while foolish is still pregnant. he falls asleep on the couch leaning against punz's shoulder after dinner its very cute

they maybe do a thing where like they have christmas with one family on eve and one on day and have a slightly chaotic nighttime flight? do the flight times work out for that idk. but its bc their families wanna see them bc theyre all excited for the baby awwww

wait just remembered the whole scene i had imagined for this where they land in mass super late at night/early morning and once they get back to punz's parents house p much immediately go to bed but foolish cant sleep bc the babies keep moving and kicking and punz scootches down so hes all curled up next to his tummy and purrs at them so that they calm down and foolish can sleep

at the end of his pregnancy foolish is just like capital d Done like get these babies out my back hurts im tired my belly is fuckin huge. ive got tits now

punz very happily gives him back massages tho <3 even if he sometimes gets overdramatically whiny about it first

foolish is one day horrified to realize none of his usual foods are appealing and he is instead craving some weird ass food combo

when foolish starts showing more and its gonna be harder to hide on stream they do a cute lil classic pregnancy announcement photo where punz like has his hands around him on his belly (maybe taken by karl? or someone? i just realized i have no idea where i hc them living like i guess its always been vaguely nc but idk if thats like. necessary? idk whatever) but im imagining the one they end up posting isnt even one of the ones they were posing for its like a candid one where theyre looking at each other over foolishs shoulder or like laughing or something idk its cute its not staged and weird lookin

oh also at some point punz convinces foolish to do a maternity photoshoot (well kind of. its just punz taking pics of him in his underwear bc he maybe has a Thing for heavily pregnant foolish) and at first foolish feels kinda embarrassed and silly and punz keeps complimenting him and making him flustered (i have a couple of lil doodles of this + a few other ones related to this au in a sketchbook somewhere but i dont feel like digging them out + taking pics rn ajfsbajskb)

final note would like everyone to know as i was typing this foolish lost his water bucket in mc and he phrased it like "my water just broke" and chat was all like "wow congratulations whos the father." like what are the chances. also why is he like this. also can u really blame me for making this au when he is like this

#long post #its under a read more but still. i just feel bad postin it cuz its so long and i know im prob the only one who cares as much as i do abt it #this au is actually quite close to my heart in the fact that it is so self indulgent so posting this feels a bit like flaying myself open #but i am being brave i am cringe but i am free etc #also i know u dont watch it but its funny to me that ur saying u've rarely seen him as a dad when for a year hes been logging onto #a mc server where he roleplays as a dad lmao #asks #funz #should i start a tag for this au idk. idek what to call it like the document title is just 'funz pregnancy slash kidfic brainrot' lmao

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choclateteez · 2 years

Text

💤Waking Up 4*town💤

🧡Robaire🧡

Hes a morning person, so waking up early isnt the problem-it all depends on the hours he gets

If someone wakes him up with 8 hours in, hes chilling

"Hm? Oh, good morning! Yeah i was just about to get out of bed anyways"

But due to the busy schedule of the boy band, there will always be those 3 hours of sleep nights

He will not be in a good mood. Hed try not to direct it at the person who woke him up though

*mumbling* What do you want..mm? Its morning already? Ffs…get out, i'll be there in a sec..

Mindless staring at the wall before he actually gets ready

Needs his cup of coffee or else its over for anyone who decides to mess with him for the first few hours of the day

💙Aaron T💙

It doesn't matter if he got enough sleep or not, this man wants to wake up on his OWN accord

He gives a very dirty/rude looking face to the person who woke him up, out of habit

He will complain and wrestle (albeit tiredly) the waker, throw a weak insult here or there

"...this is why you got a 5 head. Leave me alone."

The negotiator

"If you allow me…like 20 more minutes, then I wont be late to practice for a month, yeah?"

He's the type to set up 6 alarms before the actual wake up time and STILL oversleep

"10 more-" "T, I've given you 30 extra minutes." "Then you can spare 10 more." "Z and Tae Young are eyeing your breakfast." "...fine."

Efficient tactics: coax with breakfast, or negotiation

🧡Tae Young🧡

Determination. If he wants sleep, he will fight for it

This man keeps an IRON. GRIP. On his blankets.

talks real slow and mixes up words, and it will take him a few seconds to process what someone is saying to him

Will try to use cuteness as a weapon to get more sleep (peeking over the covers, whining, cute faces)

"Arent i the youngest? I need my sleep🥺"

It works only depending on who wakes him up

Jesse takes none of it, though he still finds it adorable

When it doesn't work, he drops the act and gets frustrated

Hed just pull the covers and ignore you until you leave

"Tae please, we have to be early today" "..." "i know you can hear me." *snores* "aint no way this mf went back to sleep😐"

When it DOES work though, he does this little snuggle thing that makes it so worth it for the waker, its just so cute

He will be in a better mood if he does get those extra few minutes though

And for the love of God, please do not give him coffee. Not that he likes it- but just don't give it to him anyways.

💙Aaron Z💙

Youd better have taken boxing classes if you wake Z up

He wakes up like hes in the middle of a fight

Fists are flying, hes sitting up, legs scrambling

One minute you waking him up, the next minute YOU the one thats asleep😧

On the more chill days, he wakes up like he just came up from underwater

*GASSPP*

Once he realizes hes been woken up, he'll slump over after the adrenaline crashes, and he lies back down to collect himself

Not many words need to be spoken, he gets the memo

Not that much of a morning person, but he will rarely complain

🧡Jesse🧡

If theres one thing Jesse takes seriously, its his sleep

He sleeps like a dead man, once hes gone, he is GONE

It would take the end of the world to actually get this man to become responsive

Pull his blankets, yell, scream, cry, he'll sleep through it all

Efficient tactics: lay on him. If you get him in an uncomfortable enough position for a long enough time, he'll HAVE to wake up.

The group usually team works this one

T likes to stand on his bed and walk on it (the constant rising and dipping of the mattress annoys Jesse), Tae would roll all over him and stay there smushing and calling out to him until he responds. Robaire's preferred method would be to blast some music, but only as a last resort. And Z, well he's just playing nice so Jesse can make him his favorite banana pancakes for breakfast🏃🏾

He often tries to sleep early so, this doesnt happen often

This mans voice is already kind of deep, but his sleepy voice????? WHEW!!!

Fangirls are lucky they dont hear his sleepy voice, or else their ovaries might explode🙄

#4town #jesse 4town #aaron t 4town #aaron z #4town taeyoung #4town robaire #4town headcanons #4town aaron z #4town jesse #headcanon

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kiddokori · 10 months

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but you're so right about everything with totk. you put it in words so well 😭 idk if you found memory 9, so i won't spoil anything, but it was SO GOOFY look up gmod smile after you watch it and explode instantly. loftwings would've made the game infinity better, like skeleehorses can go over gloom (such a silly name btw) and horses are always great, but there's nothing to ride in the sky??? missed oppurtunity imo. i basically play with no tech becuase i hate using it 😔 i have much to say on this game and sadly most of it around the plot isn't thatg nice

SKELEHORSES CAN GO OVER GLOOM??????

but no yeah i dont enjoy the tech lol. i think modern tech in fantasy is a slippery slope from “woah cool its so interesting how this fantastical society developed things we never couldve thought of” to “this isnt even fantasy its just sci-fi with medieval paint slapped over it” thats what botw vs. totk is to me. we went from giant magical mechs and tech that felt more like sentient creatures to a straight up four wheeler. also its just clunky. to me. vexes me.

i am playing it very slowly for several reasons so im not far im only two memories in (trying to do them in order) lol but im not impressed by the writing either again ive only beat the rito “dungeon” idk what to call it. it was fine. really felt like they just tried to replicate the divine beasts but it didnt work. the weird disembodied voice felt forced in totk its just this random exposition guy that felt like he was just there for the sake of mimicking the structure of the champions talking to you where in botw that makes sense because they’re important characters that you learn more about and play a role in the story and also they literally died and their souls were trapped in their beasts. and totk was like ah shit ah fuck we gotta have another disembodied voice throw this guy in there and have him lore drop on you. who is he. who cares.

and then the divine beasts were like interesting involved puzzles there was one i thiiiink the camel you literally had to turn entire parts of it to line up electrical signals to get places and unlock things it was a little frustrating but i had to think about it!! same with the elephant you had to control the entire mechanism to move things and you had to Think about it. the rito ship was just go find these things. ok the divine beasts were also that with the terminals but you had to work for it. totk really just went go walk around for awhile and find them. no real puzzle to it. there was a little bit with the doors/levers but it did not feel nearly as involved or thought through.

i will say i did like the boss fight the ice guy. cool guy. looked cool baller music neat new little thing you had to do to beat it i liked it. that was cool i will give them that they know how to get me pumped for a boss fight

ok but the cutscene with zelda near the beginning was goofy as hell. just straight up like woaaaahh she floated into the sky thats crazy!!! whaaat!!!!! felt extremely silly. i was sitting there like is this a gag is this supposed to be funny i cannot tell. very much threw me off. could not take seriously

also. fucking. got rid of her again. if they wanted to have the same success of botw maybe they should’ve gee idk changed the formula again and let zelda be with us. a two player zelda game would be so cool. even if it was still single player and we could just interact with her and have her with us im thinking kindof last of us/resident evil 4 style where she helps you do certain puzzles or helps you fight like other npcs. even if she just stayed at the base and helped purah with research and you could talk to her thatd be more interesting. GIVE HER TO ME!!

the intro really just felt like oh we have to get rid of zelda again because we need link to be alone so we can copy botw uhhhhh magic rock teleports her to the past yeah yeah that works. they decided they needed this to happen and then made a story to excuse those choices rather than actually construct something cohesive.

im not even halfway through the game so i dont wanna be tooo hard on it or form strong opinions but id rather be pleasantly surprised than disappointment after getting my hopes up. i havent been spoiled for anything but i have seen people complain in general so im kinda leaning towards disappointment lol. like its zelda im still having fun i just also am looking at it from a critcal point of view and i have plenty to say. i used this as an excuse to talk for a looong time anyways. im currently working on getting specific horse colors that i preplaned by looking at this horse chart to name after characters from a book i like ✌️ i didnt pay 70 dollars to not have any fun with this game so help me god i am going to enjoy Some of it

#ITS FUN IM HAVING FUN!!!!!!! *said through gritted teeth*#i just also think a lot of the choices were bad. or not even really choices. i hope other people have fun and enjoy it im enjoying the #content ive seen other people make #the depths are my one solace…. i love her……….#anyways.. hi anon…. thanks for giving me an excuse to complain ❤️#i am so sorry i havent done shit and i dont want spoilers so i cannot join you in dunking on the later story #one day. one day ill finish totk. not right now tho

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kitmoas · 2 years

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Dom mutt headcannons?

oooo okay! Im trying to get better at writing hcs! SO bare with me :) (side note Kate's "dommy" name is puppy)

It got long so it’s under the cut :)

Kate can't sit still herself-- so sitting pretty for a dommy puppy doesn't last longer before she's petting and playing with Toy

Kate is a complete Ipad kid so when she's feeling more dominant she has Toy kneel in front of her seat to hold her ipad. If Toy makes the screen shake then there is a punishment

Aftercare with Kate is the sweetest thing to ever exist. She always loves to make sure every single part of you is okay. She gives Toy SO many kisses and cuddles, but as soon as Toy is calm and at least a little less floaty Kate is pulling them up to do something a little active (dancing in the kitchen, baking, orrrr you know... round 3)

Because Kate is new to indulging her dominant side, but she's always been able to accidentally make Toy sway around the border of subspace. Something about the chaotic loving golden retriever Pup has always had this calming vibe to it, and it lets Toy feel safe to be vulnerable enough to slip into subspace easy.

Speaking of accidentally slipping into subspace. Kate is all over the place and any time she’s feeling sorta dominant, she EXUDES that vibe. She’s enthusiastic with everything she does but sometimes she isn’t ready to really deal with the responsibilities of being a dom because she isn’t used to it. So its always a little bit clumsy and Wanda is around a lot to help.

Kate is surprisingly a pretty strict domme when she wants to be. She takes your health and well being very seriously, and because of that she does set up rules that you have to eat and drink, shower, and maintain a healthy lifestyle. The only real difference between Kate and Wanda’s rules is that Kate is a gen z. She says keep hydrated—what she means is drink something because she too only drinks energy drinks and iced coffee. She says eat food— but without WandaNat around she too eats Dino nugs and pizza every day.

A goal for Kate is to have Toy automatically go stupid brained whenever Kate, and kate only, shoves her fingers into their mouth. She wants Toy to completely just.. go boneless, brainless, and just sorta slack as she sucks on her fingers. The perfect little chew toy for the puppy to fuck around with. (Kate is far from this goal, but Toy is obsessed with it and because of their love for it -it might just happen sooner than most think)

The brainless chew toy with the fingers in their mouth is ONLY for Kate because no one else needs a chew toy. Meaning no one else should be able to ever bring that out of Toy—at least in Kate’s eyes.

Kate isn’t always possessive but when Puppy Kate is in completely out if anyone looks at Toy then she is gonna mark the fuck outta toy. Doesn’t matter where or when, Kate will yank Toy’s head back and leave a new mark somewhere on their neck.

Speaking of FULL blown Puppy Kate, the first time Kate is fully dominant with no traces of the mutt or stray; she makes Toy sob. Afterwards Toy is just like :O can we do that again. And Kate is just like :) I dont know what i did. Because it wasn’t even sexual. Wanda is off to the side literally like :| I’m dealing with idiots.

Punishments for Kate are very much non -sexual and are Wanda inspired in almost every way. She believes in basic punishments if its just Toy acting out, but will get more creative with her punishments as she grows to be be confident.

Kate isnt much of a caregiver, at least not like Natasha or even Wanda. She gives more of an amazing babysitter vibe. She likes taking care of little Toy though. She does think thumb sucking is gross (dont come at her for making Toy suck on her fingers in every other moment) so she buys toy HELLA pacis.

Okay this is getting a little long so imma gonna stop it now :)

#k: TGU building #k: pup!kate #k: training grounds #marvel fanfiction #wanda maximoff #kate bishop #marvel wlw #natasha romanoff #wandanat #kate bishop x reader #kate bishop x you #kate bishop x female reader

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regryrth · 8 months

Text

#drdtdevappreciation

Im so proud of how you all as a fandom handled this so well 💙 I know things are still pretty shaky in places and no one can rlly say this problem is “solved” or “forgiven” unless DRDT Dev specifically says so (which I dont mean to say they should or have to comment on anything, I know they mentioned theyre nervous and now uncomfortable interacting which I understand and accept responsibility for) But it really makes me happy to see how for the most part We’re turning something bad into appreciation. So for the fandom here. I appreciate all of you.

Even the ones who mightve gone too far. Just like me u had good or at least non malicious intent. Which turned out bad but there are still ppl who respectfully understand where youre coming from. Maybe its not wanted- But I appreciate and care for you too. I dont know how youre handling this all, But if its anything like how I did, I hope you understand nothing is ur fault just like how people have said it’s not entirely mine and not DRDT Devs. Even if it wasnt the best thing u couldve said in the moment. I understand u didnt want to harass anyone. It was a mistake made cause it’s human to act emotionaly have opinions and want to be understood with that. That can make ppl say and post things online that get deserved back-lash like I did. And the things u say can seriously hurt people like I did. I cant say how anyone else feels with everything thats happened But if Im right about everything so far. Its okay. To me at least which I guess isnt much. Even If u dont feel real remorse- You feel u were justified- But just dont want to be lectured in paregraphs over and over. Thats ok to me too. No one has to be completely justified in how they feel and it would be hyppocritical of me to say u do. And you shouldnt have to be looked at as any worse then the rest of us for stating your mind. Ur a great DRDT fan and person too and no one should claim any different for anyone. So while no one can throw around the word “forgive” for an incident that isnt ours to forgive- I “understand” u.

On a lighter note- The people who defended DRDT Dev without harassing anyone. U all acted so maturely in response to everything I honestly envy u a little. Does maturity and not making mistakes like these come one by one for you? When I make mistakes like this I feel like something with no real sense of right or wrong- Then I mess up and ppl come out to tell me where I went wrong and the “right” thing to do- And I piece together all the life lessons and “right” responses little by little until I feel safe with myself. Like a kintsugi piece. And like the cake in chapter 1! Did u have to do the same? I wonder if everyone experiences this. But thats not so relevant to appreciating you- So thank you for seeing every side. Even mine. Thank you for taking this whole situation and turning it into something good for everyone. We should talk about stuff like this more- While I still wish I hadnt posted that confession Im happy with whats been made of it- Even if the damage was still done. Because disrespecting and dehumanizing creators like DRDT Dev who put themselfs through so much to make wonderful content for us is never ok and to sweep it under the rug Like nothing ever happened is even worse. I know I requested the original post be deleted But Im ok with it being up on other blogs and posts because its important to hold stuff like this accountable and talk about it. And u guys did just that which is why Im so proud and thankful for u. This isnt a Thanksgiving dinner But u all deserve to be appreciated for doing good things too and supporting DRDT Dev.

And that brings me to who I appreciate the most- DRDT Dev. Everyone has said it so perfectly already I cant think of how to say it myself. But theyre so strong for going through all this. With their health. And going through and finding things like what I said. And other things none of us know about because they work to prioritize us over themself. And yet they still dont give up. They still keep going even with everything. They dont have to do this. But they do anyways and we should all appreciate them so much for that. Because sometimes we forget they and there team are human- I forgot that too. Doing things like my confession and taking their work for granted and other things is never ok. Im so happy we can do something to share our appreciation for DRDT, DRDT Dev and their team. Bad things and arguments and DRDT Dev being hurt by me had to happen first. I wish it didnt and that fandoms would give this much love and support to their creators without some incident happening first. But Im happy what happened let us appreciate the dev for there work now. And even if the DRDT Dev doesnt create side content anymore because of this- Its alright. They shouldnt have to push themselves past their boundaries or limits for us cause they already do so much. Even if we dont know much about them- We know enough to say theyre a wonderful person and we all love their content and them so much.

I know a lot of ppl apologized on my behalf and I suppose I wrote a longer apology to DRDT Dev and the fandom. But Ill say again as the anon themself- I am deeply sorry DRDT Dev for what I and others have said and done. I hope that you are well. And that youre able to see our appreciation through these posts.

I love you all 💙

#drdtdevappreciation #drdt #danganronpa despair time #despair time

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