#but might as well revisit the blog despite the deadness

[vampyrsm]

‣‣ COR UNUM: CHAPTER SIXTEEN | SUIJIN

‣‣ Synopsis: The Tale of the exiled ex-Shogun's daughter continues with the current Shogun demanding more answers, and going to extreme lengths to do so. And miles away, blood is spilt and someone is taken hostage in the dead of night.

‣‣ Main Masterlist | AO3 ‣‣ Pairing: Sukuna x Reader ‣‣ Word Count: est. 6.6k ‣‣ Warnings: Blank blogs & Minors DNI. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat. Set in the Early-Heian Period, trueform!Sukuna, female reader, cannibalism, descriptions of torture, waterboarding, near-death experience, Shogun has his own warning (again), blackouts, misogynistic views, death, cursed energy usage.

Hands that belong to people you don’t know grab and pull you around, they pinch and slap at skin that shouldn’t be tainted by their filthy hands. And yet, you find yourself unable to fight back when you’re forced flat onto a wooden table that had been dragged into your cell at some point. Panic floods you instantly but your head feels as if it’s been filled with cotton—what did they do to you in your sleep?

A face appears above your own, and you have just enough strength to flinch away from the proximity of the Shogun’s face. “What a sorry state you’re already in. You must truly be weak.” 

Your tongue is too thick in your mouth to voice your argument, so instead you draw your cheeks in and spit with all your might. It lands with a gross splat on his mouth, but he does not falter. Instead, a hand is raised and struck in the same move. It stings against your cheek, against the wounds there that are still so raw. 

“Worry not, dear niece. We’ll correct your behaviour, but first I want to revisit the questions you refused to answer four days ago.”

Four days. You had no idea so much time had passed, you hoped Sukuna was still nowhere near—you didn’t want him to fall for the trap they were setting up for him here. 

The Shogun stands to his full height, hands tucked behind his back in a stance you’d seen your father take so many times. “Hold her firmly, the human body even as weak as hers will react strongly to what is to come.”

Four sets of hands are pressed into your skin, at your wrists and ankles and even at your shoulders and thighs. Their hands are unpleasant in the way they hold you, as if they had a claim over your body. It makes you sick.

Your Uncle is gone from your vision for a moment before he reappears, handing something over to the man at your shoulders. A cloth is placed over your face, flat to your skin until you’re forced to open your mouth to gasp for breath. 

“A taste first, of what’s to come if you refuse to answer this time.”

You hear something moving, a sloshing of water and your blood runs as cold as the snow you know to cap the mountains outside. No, you try to scream and shake your head but the hands holding you tighten at the sudden surge in your strength. No—

Water is poured onto your face, and you can’t help but inhale deeply, reflexively. It burns at your nose and your throat, your body working hard to try and expel the water that’s poured over the cloth on your face. It feels like you’re drowning, the air in your lungs doesn’t feel like it’s enough and it’s only a matter of time before they seize working all together.

The water is pulled back quickly, and you’re able to suck in a deep breath despite the wet cloth still dripping streams of water into the back of your throat. You choke, coughing hard enough to cause your body to move painfully upwards. The hands on your body force you back down.

“Now. I think you’ll do well to answer my questions this time, or you will die in this cell. I’ll feed your body to the curses after my men are done with you.” 

The cloth is pulled from your face, and you blink harshly at the sudden shift in light. More lanterns had been lit for the convenience of the Shogun. The man before you laughs, snickering at the redness of your eyes and the tears that stain your skin. Weak, he had called you, perhaps you truly are.

“Tell me what he did to you.” The Shogun starts, tilting his head to stare at you more directly. “I know he tainted you, but how? Tell me, and I’ll try to fix you.” 

You shake your head no—you didn’t want to be fixed. The Shogun seemed to expect that answer, as he does not crumple his face in anger and instead nods his head to the man holding the cloth. It’s stretched painfully across your face and this time you suck in a deep breath.

But it’s all for nothing when he pours the water over your face again, the cold water stings violently at the back of your throat once again. He must’ve tipped the bucket with more precision this time, as you can’t help but force out the deep breath you were holding and in turn, choking violently on the water.

Your head feels fuzzy, your ears ringing and your throat tightening with each second that passes by with your own uncle waterboarding you. You feel your body surge upwards, the arch of your back painful yet nothing compared to the lack of oxygen that shocks pins and needles through your body.

The cloth is removed, as is the stream of water and you twist your body quickly. The men had allowed it, perhaps they saw the sickly sweat that stuck to your skin before you expelled whatever was left in your stomach. You had not eaten, nor drank, anything that came out was acidic enough to burn at your already torn throat. 

“Filthy pig.” Your Uncle comments when you’re forced to lay back flat, you can hardly see him through the black spots that dance in your eyes. “How many sorcerers are under his control?” 

You don’t even know if you can recall the number of people who worship Sukuna or work beside him. He had never disclosed that number to you, you didn’t know—so you shake your head, lips tingling and throat protesting when you try to voice the fact you truly had no idea.

Except, your uncle views it as a refusal to answer. “You’re as stubborn as your father. It’s what got him killed. If he just killed you when he was asked. We wouldn’t be here!” He snaps and the cloth covers the pain that flits across your face.

You don’t try to hold your breath this time, you try to relax your muscles but it’s all for nothing when the water comes. The hands holding the cloth to your face hold it more harshly to your skin, the cotton of the cloth digs into your flesh until everyone in the room can see your fruitless attempts of trying to gasp for air.

The back of your head painfully tingles, that darkness within you is utterly silent as you approach the cold hands of death. Water continues to pour over your face, drowning you with each passing second. If he doesn’t pull back soon, you were going to black out. Your brain was nothing but fuzz at this point, the ringing in your ears loud enough to drown out the snickers of the men holding you down.

“Perhaps that is enough, General.” A voice cuts through the ringing, Sugawara, you recognise that voice. The water is pulled away as is the cloth, and you can see the aforementioned man standing on the other side of the table across from the Shogun. “I was promised a bride. I will not have her brain damaged.” 

The room bristles at the tone Sugawara takes with the Shogun. Your Uncle finally cracks his mask of indifference, a nasty snarl fitting of a maddened man. “You do not order me around, Michizane.” 

“Of course not, my Lord. But if we are to have children, strong children, she has to be of sound mind.” 

Only silence is the reply to Sugawara, the bucket smashing against the stone floor before the Shogun storms out of the cell with the men who had been holding you down. You gasp finally, your lungs painfully expanding in an attempt to suck up as much oxygen as possible—as if they might come back and finish the job.

Hands grab at your shoulders, and reflexively you flinch away at the touch. Sugawara appears in front of your face, eyebrows drawn together in what may just be faux concern. “Don’t fight me, I saved your life.” 

His hands are hot against your skin, pulling and pushing you until you’re slumped onto the ground once again. Your vision swims with the motion, and Sugawara crouches in front of you again. “Rest.”

You can’t fight him on the need to sleep, and against your better judgment, you let your eyes roll closed.

...

Sometime later, you awoke. You could no longer feel the cold. The stone beneath you was as cold as ice itself, it bit at the soles of your feet and dug itself into your bones until they became too rigid to move lest they ache more. 

Time had moved differently in the damp darkness of the cell, there was no sunlight, no changing of the guard to tell you if it was day or night.

Instead, you had only the darkness and the oil in a lamp that never seemed to run out. Or perhaps it did, you had patches of darkness in your mind. Corroded away from their attempts to drown, you had no recollection of the voices who taunted you but you could see their faces when you closed your eyes. The Shogun’s face at the front of them, he would be first to receive your anger.

You dreamt of them all in those moments of reprieve. You dreamt of what it would be like to sink your fingers into their flesh, to tear it apart with your bare hands and devour them whole. You wanted to know if they screamed just as loudly as they did in your dreams, or if they’d die silently. Dignified. You hoped not, you wouldn’t grant them the chance to go quietly. They’d suffer as you have. 

Time had shifted once again, and your eyelids were barely open as you watched the dim glow of blue eyes just in front of you. Sugawara had been there consistently, never leaving even when he had to eat. Of course, he never gave you any of his own food, in fact, you haven't eaten a single thing since you left Sukuna. Your stomach had stopped aching a while ago, and now it feels like you were being eaten from the inside out.

Sugawara moves your arms carefully, as if he hadn’t been present when they started to take strips of your skin to see just how quickly you could heal even when restricted. It was fast enough to ensure you didn’t die from shock or blood loss, but the scars. The scars remained. Angry and puffy, a clear sign of their pleasure and your failure. 

Something clicks around your neck, and that familiar burning at your wrists blossoms at the nape of your neck instead. You can only blink in mild surprise at the coldness of the metal he had snapped around your neck, the chain is just as long as the ones that had been at your wrists. You could move freely, if you had the strength to do so.

Instead, you remain still as Sugawara finally takes a step back from you. And you meet his gaze, his eyes are saturated with something like sadness perhaps. Did he finally regret not choking you to death just mere days ago? You hoped so. You hoped he died with regrets, you hoped he would return to this world as nothing but a curse. You wanted him to rot.

“Heal.” He commands, and you want to roll your eyes at him. Yet your eyes do not move, and he visibly flinches at what he must see stirring in your eyes. You can feel it preening beneath your skin at the reaction, that raging darkness that bares its teeth and flexes its claws. “Heal or you won’t live to see tomorrow.”

A threat that falls flat against your face, it does nothing to deter you from glaring at him with a look only Death could hope to muster. That darkness inside swirls once again and you feel the warmth before you can stop it, it blooms beneath your skin and pulses against the exposed bones. They’d long grown infected, the smell had bothered you at first but even that you had grown numb to.

Skin moves, nerves reconnect and bones slowly retreat into their fleshy homes. It’s a relief to be able to move your fingers once again, the ache there came with not moving for so long but they feel better. They no longer burn or feel hot, they no longer leak puss. But there was something more beneath that warmth that healed your skin, you could feel the slice of something you hadn’t felt in days. 

Sugawara seems to realise it too, but he’s too late. You attack first, the shackle at your neck burns until you can feel the skin bubble and melt away but that doesn’t stop you. You throw your arm forward, your fingers splayed wide and the burst of energy that comes forth is gratifying, to say the least. It rumbles in the air, slicing without remorse. 

It collides with Sugawara hard enough to throw him backwards, the metal bars of your enclosure vanish into small diced cubes. You only had a matter of seconds before those doors at the top of the stone stairs burst open with men determined to behead you before you could cause any more chaos. 

You bring a hand up to the neck shackle, your fingers sinking into the small gap between skin and metal. It’s a tight fit, and you can feel the burn of the talisman inscription on the inside. It had been imbued at some point but it wasn’t enough to stop the resurgence of power. The twin shackles that were on your wrists must’ve been newer, more potent in their nullification. 

The metal burns hotter when you begin to pour your energy into it, to overload it with both heat and a precise amount of energy that would slice through the shackle—and not your own neck. It bends beneath your fingers, melting away until the hot metal drips and dribbles down the front of the pathetic excuse of a kimono you had been put in during your blackouts.

Something slams into your front, and your head snaps back against the stone wall. An arm presses into the shackle at your throat, crushing both your fingers and your throat in one go. Sugawara snarls in your face, eyes wide enough that you can see the blood vessels have popped. His cursed energy buzzes around him, an electrifying feeling that you had felt amid a thunderstorm.

It pulses to life with every passing second, and it’s suffocating. It makes you gasp and choke against the pressure on your throat, your fingers pinned to the talisman scripture on the inside of the shackle become victim to that same heat. 

You can feel the flesh melting into nothing but mangled stringy goop. It should be enough to make you stop, to concede and let whatever punishment is to come happen. But instead, you bare your teeth in return, and Sugawara visibly falters in front of you. Your teeth ache, and your gums burn something fierce. 

“You have no idea what he’s doing to you…” Sugawara breathes the words, but they only serve to make you throw your weight at him once again. His feet shift on the floor, and the tension in the air makes the hairs on your arms stand on end. “He’s turning—”

He stops flat. And you grin.

Your fingers sink into the material of his kimono against his side, and his cursed energy crackles at the intrusion of your fingers. Teeth are sharpened beneath your skin, they widen their maw—wider and wider until they clamp down on something. You can taste the fabric of his kimono, you can feel the warmth of his blood pooling in your stomach. 

Sugawara doesn’t breathe another word, his body thrown hard enough to the side that the wall concaves. His blood is warm against the palm of your hand, and when you glance down. You’re met with a wide mouth on your palm, with sharpened teeth—it holds a piece of flesh between its teeth, grinning at what it had taken from a man otherwise untouchable.

You’ve seen Sukuna’s second mouth in action, across his stomach, it was wide and impressive. This one is much smaller, and it’s not his teeth and lips that grin back at you. It’s your own. Those familiar teeth sink further into the flesh before it swallows the flesh whole, and it settles deep in your stomach. 

It satisfies that hunger deep inside of you, that swirling darkness purrs in delight of finally getting what it wanted after so long. Something buzzes at the back of your mind, like a hand of black claws that caresses down the top of your spine. He felt it. He felt that explosion of cursed energy, his own cursed energy being used and manipulated.

Sukuna knew.

Your joy is short-lived, however. Sugawara launches forward from the rubble, and you recognise the glint of firelight on a steel blade anywhere. You can’t move out of the way, the shackle at your throat is partially melted away but it still holds you in place when his blade strikes true. It glides across your stomach, digging past the cloth in a clean line and it slices deeply, cleanly. 

The blood pools warmly down your front, you bring the hand that previously housed the second mouth down to that opened wound. You wait for it to close, but it doesn’t—... It bleeds through your fingers, mixing with the blood of the blue-eyed Samurai until it is an uncomfortable thickening amount of blood.

Sugawara flicks the blade fluidly in an arc, your blood spraying across the floor. You finally glance at the blade itself, and the engraved words across the steel blade glow with a brightness you had seen from the man who had taken you down in the village. A cursed weapon. No doubt embedded with the same technique that was suppressing your cursed technique from the outside. 

It had struck you, had tasted your blood and frayed your skin as if it was made of silk. It burns. Like your insides have been set alight by an unstoppable fire, hotter than anything you had ever felt. It was unlike the real flames that had doused you when you trained with Sukuna, this was a blinding type of fire. A fire that judged, a fire that burned away sins and darkness.

Doors suddenly explode open, a flood of men with their swords drawn but they halt when Sugawara holds up a hand in their direction. His body is hunched over, blood pouring from the open wound on his side. 

“Tell the Shogun she can’t be reformed. She’s to be put in the disciplinary pit, and left there.” He commands, albeit breathlessly. His words sound wet even to himself, his tongue thick with blood and spit. He doesn’t have long until he passes out from the impact of being both bitten and having his Infinity shredded.

The men visibly hesitate, eyes darting between Sugawara who clutches his side with a growl and you, your eyes unfocused and dazed. You’d be struck with something life-ending, and now faced with your own mortality—you can’t feel a thing. Nothing but that incessant burning deep within your blood, ravaging its way up to your heart where it finds something much worse than the darkness of your mangled soul.

“NOW!” Sugawara barks, marching his way back towards you despite the wound on his side. He grabs the chain that was hoisting you up to the wall, the shackle digs further into the deep burns on your neck. 

“You had a chance to live, and you threw it away like the foolish woman you are.” His words are hissed in your face before he pulls you harshly forward, and you’re forced to hunch over at the pain that spreads up from your gut. Blood soaks your arms, drips along the floor in a steady flow as you’re forced to follow behind Sugawara.

Men of the Zen’in clan and the Shogunate all have their blades drawn when you pass by, none strike at you but you have a feeling they know they won’t need to. Not when you were to be put in something known as the ‘disciplinary’ pit. Admittedly, you had never heard of it. It was never in any literature and it certainly wasn’t mentioned when you were brought here by your father as a child.

The walk isn’t nearly as long as it was to the Shogun’s quarters, but as you grow closer to whatever the pit may be. Your stomach churns, you can feel a thrum of cursed energy coming from within that doesn’t belong to anyone living. It’s the type of energy that smells of rot and decay, it grasps at your throat and chokes you. 

Sugawara seems unperturbed by the fact he’s growing closer to what must be a multitude of cursed spirits, and you find yourself unable to fight him the closer you get to the pit. Your feet slide along the smooth stone, sliding in your own blood, if it weren’t for the chain at your neck—you would’ve fallen.

Another pull of the chain has you tugged forward until you’re in front of Sugawara, your front just mere inches away from his own. He sneers down at you along the length of his nose, those crystalline blue eyes alive with something you’ve come to recognise this far into life—hatred. 

Slowly, he starts to take steps forward and in turn, you’re forced to step backwards with him. “May you go with peace, and honour.” He speaks plainly and without emotion. “You were not given an easy life, and I hope in the next one, you’re free.” 

Sugawara plants a hand solidly against your chest, and the entire world shifts with the pressure. He falls away, or rather, it’s you who falls backwards. The air whooshes past your ears, drowning out the noise of your rushing blood and the undignified scream that comes from your throat.

You watch as Sugawara grows further and further away, the large doors closing behind him and with him goes the only light as you fall into an inky void of darkness.

...

“Izumi?” Yorozu calls out from the safety of her bedroom. Her attendant, Izumi, would typically come running at the sound of her voice but Yorozu finds that the woman hasn't so much as lit the hearth in the corner of her room. Immediately, her eyebrows draw together. 

Normally, Yorozu wouldn’t care about the absence of her attendant. Izumi often got punished for Yorozu’s behaviour; namely the fact she refused to dress appropriately no matter the company. But something was off tonight. The Five Empty Generals had regrouped back at the base of operations, a large estate that belonged to the Fujiwara family. 

Even the Sun, Stars and Moon squad had been called back in by the head of the family. Not entirely unheard of but certainly unusual, to have all of them in one place would mean unmeasured amounts of cursed energy concentrated in one spot—an easy way for cursed spirits, and much worse to find them without much effort.

Yorozu pouts at the lack of her attendant and pushes herself up from the futon. The haori she wears does nothing to hide her body, especially when she opts to keep it untied as she traverses the halls. 

It’s silent. An unnatural silence that causes the hairs on her arms to rise, she can’t sense anything—no unusual amounts of cursed energy, and that should’ve been the first warning sign. Something was off. Terribly so. Her bare feet are silent on the tatami mat, carrying her further and further into the large estate. 

All of them resided within one building, or rather, they all had living quarters here. Not many of them stayed here permanently, but Yorozu did. She had nowhere else to go, her life in Aizu was over and here she had proven her worth as someone strong. Someone worthy of being with the strongest. 

So, to not sense any of the other members who made up the Five Empty Generals was off-putting. Yorozu knew they were here, and yet. She follows the usual path that leads out of the estate, the faintest throb of cursed energy coming from outside.

The grand entrance doors are slow to open to the outside world, the night sky shimmers with stars and the moon hides behind white clouds. Yorozu comes to a slow stop at the top of the steps that lead down to the sandy courtyard, the path of stones soaked in crimson red. 

Her blood grows cold, her heart pattering against her ribcage uselessly. It was odd to feel this scared—it was unheard of for someone like Yorozu to feel something like fear. She didn’t feel fear when she fought the Five Empty Generals to gain her title, she didn’t feel fear when she stood in front of the Emperor when he gave his orders and she certainly didn’t feel fear when she wrapped her arms around Sukuna the first time she met him.

Crackling and popping has her head darting up, her eyes sharpening when she notices the pyre of brilliant flames burning near the bridge. A way of stopping her escape. 

“Admiring my work?” A voice speaks directly behind her, the husk of it a deep rumble that not even a slumbering dragon could replicate. Yorozu knows not to move, and to not look over her shoulder at the one and only Sukuna Ryomen.

“The Fujiwara Family are so feared all over Japan. The stories of the Five Generals being strong enough to overpower even the Emperor—” Sukuna laughs low in his throat, a condescending noise. “How foolish. They hardly put up a fight.” 

Yorozu remains frozen when a hand extends out from the darkness behind her, the large claws dripping with blood glinting in the shimmering moonlight. Sukuna merely gestures towards the fire in the distance before it grows brighter, more ferocious that even Yorozu can feel the heat from where she stands across the entrance courtyard. 

The fire moves as if it had a life of its own, it slithers over the top of the sand like a snake would. It creeps closer and closer until it hits something, and then it starts to crawl upwards. Yorozu feels her lungs squeeze tightly, her lungs expelling any breath she may have been holding when the scene is revealed to her in a show of fire.

In front of her are four posts, all of them spread equally and each of them holds one man. Their bodies have been torn and shredded, yet kept together by organs and bones that were exposed to the firelight. Yorozu couldn’t see their faces, but the extravagant Kabuto helmets hiding their faces were enough to tell her who exactly had been tied to large wooden posts with their own innards.

The Five Empty Generals. 

The fire continues to crawl up the wooden posts, burning across organs and stringy flesh. It’s enough to cause the pinned men to squirm and screams are muffled into their masks. A hand presses between Yorozu’s shoulder blades and she’s forced to take staggering steps down into the sand below. Her feet sink into the agglomerate mixture of blood and sand.

“I’ve always dreamed of taking on the strongest group of sorcerers in all of Japan.” Sukuna drawls as he takes heavy steps down the short stairs into the courtyard. “I always thought it’d be a special occasion, maybe they’d even be strong enough to kill me.” 

Sukuna laughs deeply at his last comment, passing by Yorozu to take a stand in front of the four men hitched to posts. His upper body is entirely exposed, the starkness of his tattoos glimmer in the firelight and Yorozu can spy all the blood and body matter sprayed across his body. He doesn’t seem the least bothered by it, in fact, he seems to be enjoying it more than anything. 

“It surprised me when I heard a mutt from Aizu challenged the Generals, appointed to be one of them to defend her home of Aizu.” Sukuna’s lips uptick at the mention of her home prefecture, and something like dread pools deeply in her stomach. “The village hardly stood a chance against Uraume. They said they all cried out for you, and yet you never came.”

“I didn’t care for them.” Yorozu brushes off, yet even she knows Sukuna can taste the tinge of guilt in the air. 

“No?” Sukuna grins, and there’s a heavy thud of something in the sand. Yorozu doesn’t want to look down, she doesn’t— “You didn’t care for the woman who stood by your side since you were born?”

“No.” Her voice wobbles against her own will and like the beast that he is, Sukuna latches onto it.

“Look at what your carelessness has caused.” He smiles through the words, and yet Yorozu holds his gaze. Fire like the one behind him sets his eyes ablaze. “LOOK!” 

His yell rips through the air, Yorozu visibly flinches at the sound of it and her eyes snap down to what had been thrown at her feet. Izumi’s lifeless eyes stare back at her, her head severed from her body and mouth agape in a permanent silent scream. 

Her stomach churns painfully, Izumi may have been the victim of Yorozu’s lack of decorum but she had been there, always. She was the one Yorozu cried to in the face of rejection, and she was there to lift the brunette back up. 

“She was nothing to me.” 

“You’ve always been a terrible liar.” Sukuna snickers to himself, head tilting to the side when Yorozu meets his gaze. “It’s why you would’ve made a terrible lover of mine.”

Yorozu bristles at his words, and the spike in her cursed energy has Sukuna raising an eyebrow in amusement. “You’re wrong.”

“Oh?” His upper arms cross lazily over the broadness of his chest, whilst the other two rest loosely at his hips.

“I never would’ve fallen for such an obvious trap, only a foolish whore—”

The world falls away, the moonlight painting itself across Yorozu’s face. Sukuna looms over her, fangs bared in a snarl befitting of the King of Curses. One hand remains wrapped around her throat, squeezing tight enough to turn her lips a blueish-purple.

“Utter one more word and you will die here.” The red of his eyes visibly shook beneath the weight of his anger, it was clear he had been reigning it in as best he could since he woke up alone in that temple of his. “I’ll find great pleasure in ripping you apart, slowly, piece by piece until you beg for me to kill you.”

“Do it.” Yorozu hisses through paling lips, her hand fruitlessly clawing at the hand at her throat. Sukuna snarls louder, the growl that rumbles through his chest enough to shake even the ground beneath them.

Then the growling stops, and he grins. All teeth and malice. “No. You’re going to be a welcome home gift for my wife.” 

With a quick pull on her neck, her body follows his momentum until her head collides with the floor beneath her and her eyes roll into the back of her head.

…Sukuna stands from Yorozu’s now still body, his eyes darting to the side to see Uraume approaching to take Yorozu as discussed. 

“Chain her to a post in the courtyard, by the tree. Keep her on the brink of death.” Sukuna instructs Uraume who then picks up Yorozu without much of a struggle, they bow as best they can with someone in tow before vanishing in a flurry of snowflakes and a gust of wind.

“I was wondering when you’d show yourself instead of cowering with your tail between your legs.” Sukuna remained staring at the space once occupied by Yorozu and Uraume, the air had become denser; heavier with cursed energy and yet they never came forth when Sukuna had leapt onto Yorozu.

“We didn’t want to interrupt.” A male calls out from somewhere behind Sukuna. He turns slowly, his feet digging into the bloodied sand beneath him. When he turns around, he’s met with multiple sets of eyes all turned to look at him. Sun-Moon-Stars, a fractured unit of assassins after you had wiped one from the slate of existence and another was eaten by Yuki Onna.

“More the merrier. Maybe it would’ve been fun to fight you all together.” Sukuna couldn’t help but lean into the fact he knew he was the strongest here, it was too easy to intimidate them with his cursed energy. He knew they weren’t quick to spook at the sight of the gore and horror show he made whilst waiting for Yorozu to crawl from hiding in her bedroom.

Sukuna’s ears perk up at the sound of multiple feet landing in the vicinity, ah, they brought out their lesser ranks in hopes of taking him down for good. The grin comes automatically to his face, all four eyes alight with pure unbridled joy—the prospect of fighting had been reduced to just training in the past few months, he may have enjoyed sparring with you but this… the chance to rip someone's life away was much more invigorating.

“It was rather cowardly of you to trick someone into their capture. Did you know you’d lose in a fight against her? Against me?”

Much to Sukuna’s surprise, one of the silhouetted figures laughs. “Perhaps. But we can’t be blamed for how stupid she was. We just took advantage of it.”

His blood boils beneath his skin, all four of his arms moving to flex his hands at his sides. The blood had long dried and cracked on his skin, the warmth radiating from him was hot enough to rival the still-burning pyre in the courtyard. Stupidity. They knew nothing of the word, evidently, as they stood before Sukuna in all his glory.

Muscles flex with each breath he draws in, the claws at his hands ache with the need to sink into human flesh and the prickle of his cursed energy in the palm of his hands yearns for more. And he will give it more.

Before any of them could move a muscle, Sukuna vanishes from the spot he’s in. He can taste the sudden spike of their own cursed energy, the fear that comes with being a mortal human tastes better than any meal he had ever feasted on. Immediately, he zones in on each and every single cursed signature in the area.

Twelve of them.

He laughs at that. Not enough.

With an outstretched hand, he palms the hand of the first face he comes in contact with. The masked man widens his eyes at the sudden appearance of Sukuna, the man with all four of his eyes wide and a manic laugh bursting from his throat. Oh, this was going to be fun. 

Skin bends beneath long claws, “Hah!” Sukuna exclaims as it was too late for the man to react. His body explodes into a bloody red mist, spraying into the sand below. He takes the next move in stride, his body swinging around on one heel and his foot collides head-on with a man who had dared to run at him.

The assassin’s body is sent flying into the trees dotted around the estate, the crack and splat of skin enough of a sign for Sukuna that they did not survive the hit or the fall. 

“Come on! You’ll never win coming at me one at a time!” Sukuna grins, the tongue at his stomach lolling out as that too grins at the tangible fear in the air. Two more rush at him, and he once again vanishes from the spot in a cloud of disturbed sand.

With two hands linked together over his head, Sukuna brings his entire weight back down onto the men beneath him. Flesh and bone are nothing in comparison to that of a chaotic disaster, blood explodes around him—a reminder that humans are nothing but sacks of blood. So pathetic…

The ground shatters beneath his feet, his hands that were cupped together splay out on the ground and the men approaching him are thrown into the air when the ground beneath them is upended. Something tingles at the back of his mind, and Sukuna almost startles at the sensation. 

Oh.

Time comes to a halt. Grains of sand float in the air, suspended in time and the men before him have no chance to correct their mistake. Most of them remain in the air, the others perched on the roof of the estate are midway through drawing their weapons. 

Humans are just as foolish as they are brave. 

Standing to his full height once again, Sukuna draws two hands together at his stomach in a hand sign to strengthen his technique. A binding vow he’s certain to inform you of when you return to him, he can’t have you losing another fight. The other two arms straighten out in front of him, energy bubbling at the tips of his fingers—with a final grin, Sukuna leans into the cursed energy he had come to know so intimately.

To use such a huge amount of cursed energy was something like a phenomenon, a moment in time where nothing quite feels right. As if the world scales tilt in the wrong direction, and it is Sukuna who holds that scale in his hand when he throws just a mere fraction of his strength forward.

The men who had been held in place by familiar cursed energy are sliced into nothing but meagre strips of their former selves. A mist of blood that sprays momentarily only to be swept away in the same breath. Cleave and Dismantle work in tandem, one slices and one cuts. Two entirely different things when it comes to Sukuna’s technique.

It’s absolute silence that follows the death of the men in front of him, before the area explodes. Debris from the estate is thrown into the air, shredded and turned into rubble before Sukuna has even released his next breath. The estate and all of the land before him is razed to the ground, and the bodies of those who may have been inside are nonexistent as are the ones outside. 

Sukuna stands alone once again, not so much as a scratch or a mere touch against his body from those who had come to fight him. Disappointment didn’t fill him however at the lacklustre fight, if anything, he was too distracted by that tingle at the back of his mind. 

He turns on his feet, facing towards the south. He felt something, at the moment of being allowed access to your cursed energy once again. He felt his own energy explode somewhere, hundreds of miles away but he felt it. 

And now he knew where you were. Alive and fighting. 

Sukuna spares no glance towards the destruction and abolishment of the Five Empty Generals as well as the Sun-Moon-Stars squad, they would go down in history as being a failed attempt on Sukuna’s life. 

A single step is taken before he vanishes from the spot he was in, whoever was holding you captive was surely to suffer the consequences of daring to lay a hand against what is his.

‣‣ Main Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

#dead dove do not eat #cw gore #cw dark content #cw violence #tw cannibalism #sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #jjk x reader

[esotheria-sims]

Hi Esotheria, as suggested by Goat, I wonder if you can help me finding antique knickknack deco to put on bookshelves of my Elder Sims? :)

Hello, friend of Goat! ^^ You opened quite the Pandora box with this ask, lemme tell you! xD There’s just SO MUCH good clutter to be found all across the web; listing each individual piece would take me months! So in that name, I’ll be mostly listing general sites and blogs where I download my clutter from, with only the occasional recommendation for specific pieces of cc. I trust that you’ll do the ‘hard’ but enjoyable job of browsing through those recommended sites. ;)

- First and foremost: Garden of Shadows. Obvious one, I know, but I can’t stress enough just how many terabytes of cc gems the forum contains! From the Antiques and Oddities section to Monthly themes, events, and gift exchanges, GoS is the go-to resource if you want weird and wonderful cc, clutter included. Even if you think you’ve browsed it all and know everything the forum has to offer, revisiting some classics (e.g. Advent 2012) with fresh eyes might put you in the way of awesome clutter that you missed the first time around!

- Another obvious one: The PlumbBob Keep. Like GoS, it’s a HUGE forum with tons of hidden treasures, so definitely worth taking a look at. These fine porcelain plates, for example, look like something an elderly sim with a refined taste would display on their shelf! The forum also has a Conversions sections that’s worth checking out, because...

- ...conversions from other games like Bioshock, Skyrim, TSM, Dragon Age, etc. are a great way to get your hands on unique clutter! Some of my go-to object converters include Yolartut, Delonariel, Veranka, Hafiseazale, Amovitam, Mistyfluff, and Kativip. The last is an individual creator, but also the name of a whole forum that shares super-cool conversions, among many other things. I understand that most of the preview pics on Kativip’s site are sadly busted these days, but don’t let it discourage you! The site is absolutely worth digging through, even blindly.

- If you want clutter that’s shabby chic, old-timey but still contemporary in essence, SimPearls is a good place to look. The forum requires registration to be able to download from, but a number of resident SimPearls creators (e.g. Kim, Amythestfenix, Deatherella, Betsy4arts) also have personal blogs that you can check out!

- An oldie but goldie, Parsimonious features tons of great stuff that holds up incredibly well despite its age. Their creations are sorted in sets by room rather than by type of object, but there’s clean previews for each included piece, so browsing around should be a breeze!

- A more recent(ish) creator, MrsReval has many, many droolworthy object conversions. How about this cool pipe for your elders’ shelves, or these fancy figurines?

- Pocci/Gardenbreeze is a somewhat forgotten creator with a limited, if nice selection of quality cc. Their Roses Mini Set is a personal fave I can’t seem to play without, and then there’s also these sunflowers in a vase and these dainty deco birds that I’m submitting for your consideration.

- Speaking of forgotten creators: make sure to not miss out on HolySimoly, Adele, Om/Avalon, and Ogulama: all dead sites that have been archived courtesy of Liquid Sims. (*Protip: if you ever run across a creator who has disappeared and/or deleted their stuff, @sims2packrat likely has backups!)

- Riekus13‘s Tumblr is an absolute must for top-tier cc recolors! I don’t think there’s a cc object in existence that Riekus hasn’t recolored at some point, so their download archive doubles as a cc catalogue in its own right!

- Moxxa is a retired creator who shared many gorgeous converted object sets back in the day. Note that her cc style is mostly modern/contemporary, but maybe you can still find something nice for your elders’ shelves. How about this decorative model plane, for example?

- Someone else you might wanna check out is Beautifulnerdkitty. Like Moxxa, their cc is predominantly modern, but it’s so gorgeous and well done that it’d be a shame not to mention them!

- Pixelry is another member of the ‘gorgeous hq cc that’s not strictly antique but absolutely worth the effort‘ gang. Their original Tumblr got deleted and the link I’ve given only contains a small fraction of all the stuff they’ve shard over the years, so make sure to also check out their Old CC archive and SFS backup folder. (*Note: The Archive is on SimPearls so might require registration).

- Finally, a useful tip: sometimes, the best way to find good clutter is to rip it straight outta the games of other people via lot downloads! ;) I can’t even begin to tell you just how many unique pieces I’ve gotten just by plucking JodelieJodelie’s furnished lots; and you can do the same with any creator whose style you like!

I feel like there’s a ton of creators I’m forgetting to mention, but I believe there’s enough material here to keep you busy for a while. ;) Have fun downloading! ^^

#sims 2 #ts2 #ask #wcif #wcif buy mode #wcif clutter #wcif sculptures #resources

[portalportalau]

I’m so happy this blog is starting to be active again

Thanks!!!

I don’t want to make any promises of being active, but I’m glad I can let all these asks/submissions see the light of day now!

#It's hard judging how dead an au is since it's always a sliding scale of activity #but might as well revisit the blog despite the deadness #ask #whybothertho421

[writeforfandoms]

Shake, Rattle and Roll epilogue

My masterlist

Okay folks. This is later than I intended but uh life kicked me around a bit. Sorry. 

Also. Once you’ve read it. There is a possibility that I could do a sequel for this, if there’s interest. I know I left things unsolved (the actual original murder for one) and I know what happened and how and why, but there wasn’t a clean space to add it in, because life doesn’t always work that way. SO if you wanna know more, let me know! My ask box is always open to y’all. Also lmk if you want more because honestly? I could definitely be persuaded to write more. This is fun. 

Summary: A little bit of cleanup. Some sleep. Some coffee. Things will look better in the morning.

Warnings: Just swearing for this one, nothing terrible.

Tags: @fandom-blackhole @pedrocentric @sarahjkl82-blog @giizhkens-cedar 

--

It didn’t take longer than an hour to get back to your apartment, all told. The three of you hadn’t stuck around long after making sure Inumon and Mikken were both dead. Cee had been a trooper, keeping up with you and not complaining once on the trip. You splurged for a private ride for a few reasons, one of which was that you simply really did not want to bother with public transit at this hour. It was late, later than you usually ventured out, and between the hour and the leftover adrenaline, you were a bit twitchy. Ezra, on the other hand, seemed cool as a cucumber. 

But once the three of you were in your apartment, you were half-way to collapsing, and Cee looked like she was hanging on by a thread.

“Sleep first,” you decided. “Planning tomorrow.” You pointed Cee sternly to the couch before you left to grab extra blankets and pillows for her.

“You sure it’s okay for me to stay the night?” Cee asked, sounding close to her age for the first time all night.

“I insist,” you told her firmly, handing her two pillows. “I’ve got more blankets if you need them, and you can borrow some clothes if you don’t want to sleep in those.”

“I’m okay for tonight,” Cee told you after a momentary pause. “Thank you.”

“Here.” You stepped into the kitchenette to grab her a glass of water. “Drink before bed or you’ll probably be dehydrated in the morning.”

Cee’s lips twitched but she took the glass. Probably just to appease you, but whatever, you’d take it. 

“I can find my own accommodations for the night,” Ezra offered.

“No, I’ve got a cot you can use,” you offered. “It’s not the most comfortable thing, but it’ll do.”

“It’ll do, indeed,” Ezra mused. “Very gracious of you.” 

You waved his thanks off, going back to the closet to grab the cot, and more pillows and blankets. Fortunately you were well stocked on those. Ezra helped, taking the cot from you and setting it up as you directed him. 

“Planning tomorrow,” you said again, looking between the two of them. Cee was already curled up under a blanket on the couch. “Sleep now, hopefully. When we’re all less tired.” 

“You’d do well to take your own advice, dove,” Ezra advised, glancing over at you from setting up the cot. “Get some water and sleep.”

You shot him a look, a little exasperated but mostly amused. You hesitated for a few moments, though. Did you bring up the kiss? Wait for him to bring it up? Then you made a face at yourself for acting like a kid with a crush and headed for your bedroom, more than ready to collapse. Everything would keep until tomorrow, of that you were certain. 

Despite being unused to having company, you fell asleep quickly and slept soundly. You woke to the smell of coffee, and rolled out of bed still a bit bleary. 

Cee and Ezra were both already awake. Cee was sitting on the couch cross-legged, while Ezra lounged against the counter. You looked at both of them briefly and then made for the coffee, hip-checking Ezra out of your way. 

“Good morning to you too, dove,” Ezra said, bright and amused.

“Coffee first,” you grumbled, getting down a mug. Coffee always came first.

“Coffee gremlin,” Cee said knowingly.

“The fuck, kid?” You half-turned to shoot her a betrayed look, to which she shot you a bright smile. Okay. Fine. Kid could make fun of you if she smiled like that. Fuck. You doctored your coffee how you liked it quickly, not bothering to move from where you were still right next to Ezra. He didn’t seem to mind, and it was your place, he could move if he wasn’t comfortable.

“So,” Cee started, looking at you briefly before suddenly finding the coffee table in front of her fascinating. “What now?”

You let out a breath, not quite a sigh. “What do you want? First and foremost.”

Cee considered for a few moments, letting the silence stretch. “I want to go to school.” Her voice was quiet, almost a whisper.

“Okay,” you agreed easily, tamping down your anger. Damon was dead, your anger would do you no good. “School. That can be arranged.”

Her head popped up and she stared at you, painfully hopeful. “Seriously?”

“‘Course. I’ll work it out. I know some people.” You smiled at her, hoping you hid your pain well enough. This poor kid. She clearly wasn’t used to people standing in her corner. New mantra for the day: Damon’s already dead, don’t be mad at him. 

“I reckon I shall have to venture on to find my next job, as this one didn’t pan out,” Ezra said, though he was watching you. 

You snorted softly at that. “I might know a few people for that, too,” you admitted before you took a large sip of coffee. “I’ve made a few contacts over the years.”

Ezra blinked at you, momentarily stunned silent. Probably not used to people offering help, rather than bartering. Clear sign he’d spent too long on the Green Moon. 

“Right,” you muttered, shifting away from the counter and starting to pace, because you felt better thinking while moving, and this required some thinking. “Cee, we’re gonna have to go get some of your things. I’m assuming you have things you’d like to keep that aren’t currently with you?”

Cee nodded, hair bobbing around her until she pushed it behind her ears.

“Okay. That’s the top of the list. I can always send out a few feelers now, probably won’t hear back from anyone for a few hours at least. We should try to move quickly, I have no idea when that house will be discovered, or people will be noted as missing.” You took another sip of coffee, your mind whirring back to life. 

You were abruptly stopped in the middle of one of your circuits, Ezra grabbing you firmly. You squeaked and managed not to slosh coffee all over the two of you, even as he grinned.

“A more generous and selfless soul I’ve not had the pleasure of meeting,” he hummed, voice low, eyes bright. “You are a rare one indeed, dove.”

You blinked at him, flabbergasted, not quite sure how to respond to that. Which, of course, he took advantage of, and kissed you again. Your brain blanked out just as quickly as it had woken up. 

“As cute as you two are,” Cee interrupted after seconds? Minutes? Who the hell kept track of time anymore anyway. “There’s something I need to show you.”

You pulled back from Ezra with some reluctance and pointed a finger at him. “We’re revisiting this topic later.”

“Yes ma’am.” Ezra’s lips curled in a devious, smug smile. 

You swallowed hard and turned to Cee, watching as she dug something out of her pocket. She unfolded it on the coffee table, looking suddenly nervous. You drifted closer to look.

It was a map. A map of the Green Moon, if you weren’t mistaken. A map of the Green Moon with coordinates and a circled area. 

“Dad didn’t have the only copy of the map,” Cee told you, looking between you and Ezra. “I have one too.” 

Time stood still. You were frozen. You didn’t move, didn’t breathe. Just stared at the map. And then, slowly, you looked at Ezra. The look on his face scared you, just a little. He looked… well, he looked like a prospector presented with a map to possibly the biggest haul of aurelac ever seen. Hungry and greedy and a little awestruck. 

“Tomorrow,” you decided, shaking your head and putting your hand flat over the map, breaking the spell on the room. “That is now a tomorrow problem. We have more immediate problems to figure out first.” You shot Ezra a look that just dared him to disagree with you. But he simply nodded, leaning back, unwilling to argue over it. 

Good. You had enough problems for today that you needed to tackle. One last deep breath, and you left the two of them so you could start sending out messages. Today problems first. You could tackle the map problem tomorrow. Or later, if you could manage it. For today, Cee was your priority.

#shake rattle and roll #ezra x reader #ezra prospect x reader #clue!au

[seyaryminamoto]

I feel like i'm gonna regret asking this but what is hiby

Oh. Ohohoho, oh. I recently answered this to someone else (not on this blog), I suppose there are so many newcomers in this fandom lately that HIBY has become slightly less known than it used to be.

HIBY stands for How I Became Yours, the most polemic and catastrophic fancomic in the history of the Avatar franchise. If you thought any of the official comics were problematic in any sense, woah boy, they’re goddamn flawless masterpieces compared to this thing.

Every possible angle of HIBY is problematic. Spot-on accusations of tracing were the main reason why Deviantart took down Jackie Diaz’s profile and comic from their platform. I heard Nickelodeon also got involved legally, not 100% sure on that front, but if true, they cracked down on her because she attempted to profit off this clunky mess of an inconsistent story by claiming it was somehow an official sequel to ATLA. To clarify, this last thing is something I was told, I can’t find actual sources to confirm it… so maybe I heard an exaggerated account of the tale of HIBY and it never went that far. Nevertheless, this comic didn’t need to escalate into a legal problem to be absolutely abhorrent.

In regards of art, HIBY somehow keeps discarding the asian-inspired setting seen throughout ATLA and instead favors showing the characters in European castles and outfits that don’t fit anywhere within ATLA’s world at all:

Katara is basically wearing a red version of Belle’s dress from Beauty and the Beast, if I’m not mistaken. The architecture of the place they’re at is so European it’s baffling (if I’m not mistaken, this is supposed to be Toph’s family’s house :’D). Also, it’s blatantly obvious that the background is a photograph, so she could’ve just as easily looked for photos of asian locations instead, but she picked european architecture because yes. Yet more blows against the possible artistic merits someone could offer this comic (if there’s any).

Now, though, the BIGGEST problem in HIBY is, of course, the story:

To recap: ATLA ends with Aang and Katara kissing at Ba Sing Se. Whatever problems someone may have with their relationship, or Mai and Zuko’s, or Sokka and Suki’s, it’s unquestionable that those three ships were canon by the end of the show.

Jackie Diaz’s SEQUEL COMIC doesn’t acknowledge this finale: somehow, Aang is in love with Toph but they’re not together despite there’s literally NOTHING in their way, since Aang and Katara weren’t together at all, according to Diaz. And Katara? Oh, she’s pining endlessly over Zuko, who somehow married Mai…

… Despite wanting Katara too.

… Despite he literally knocked up Katara back when the war was ending, which resulted in a miscarriage because of Mai’s wicked schemes~~!!

Can someone please explain to me in what world does it make sense for Zuko, FIRE LORD ZUKO, to be in a relationship with someone he doesn’t want, when the person he does want is RIGHT THERE, AVAILABLE, when there’s no real political consequences to ANYTHING that happens in this comic? You could say “oh no the Fire Nation people wouldn’t accept a Water Tribe woman…” … but then Zuko ends up with Katara anyways and the only problem is that Mai wants to kill them for that :’) so… no excuse works.

Basically there’s no real plot, the whole thing boils down to “I want these ships to happen and I need them to face hardships even if they don’t make sense”. The main hardship is that Mai doesn’t want her HUSBAND to carry out an affair with Katara. Zuko’s response to Mai’s obvious and reasonable complaint about their illicit relationship is to TURN VIOLENT WITH HER. And he’s the good guy :’)

Mai has a non-existent older brother Sho, who looks like a BLEACH character with Ozai’s hairstyle, and together they will try to kill Katara because, welp, someone has to give them trouble, I guess. In all fairness, the only character with a relatively logical flow of thought in this damn trainwreck is Mai. I mean, “my piece of shit husband married me for political clout, got his mistress pregnant, I didn’t want the kid to be a problem for me so I induced a miscarriage in Katara by poisoning her, probs just wanted Katara dead altogether but whatever, I only got the kid. Then Zuko threw me away despite I’m his legal wife and I’m really pissed about it so I want Katara dead” is the smartest writing in this entire comic. And no, that’s not a compliment, it’s still stupid as fuck but that’s how much more stupid everything else is. 

So, the happy couples are, like I said, Zuko and Katara, who get together despite Zuko is married to Mai, Aang and Toph, who somehow weren’t together despite there’s nothing in the way, AAAND… 

… Sokka and fake!Azula. Because I refuse to acknowledge that thing as the Princess we all love and adore.

Frankly, I consider it a miracle that HIBY didn’t destroy our ship completely when it was posted online, seeing as it was amongst the most talked-about fanmade content in Avatar’s fandom at the time. If people no longer associate Sokkla with HIBY immediately, we’ve definitely done a good job saving our poor ship’s face and showing it’s got a fuckton of potential compared to the shitfest that comic portrayed.

Why is Sokkla so problematic in HIBY? Because of fake!Azula, of course. Why is she fake!Azula? Because she’s got plot-convenient amnesia! Turns out that, for some reason, Azula forgot all the events from ATLA (let’s be real, so did Jackie Diaz so it’s not just her) and she shows up in this comic as a completely different character, so much that, upon hearing about the TERRIBLE THINGS SHE DID AND WAS, her reaction is…:

Fascinating, am I right? :’D She’s nice, sweet, shy and as good as brain-dead. And as she’s so sweet and cute now, somehow that becomes absolutely appealing for Sokka. And he falls for her, she falls for him, they bang dramatically, and so on and so forth…

Eventually Azula sacrifices herself in the final battle when Mai and her brother try to kill everyone and oh no! Sokka’s love interest dies again! Such a shocker, however, that Sokka goes to the Spirit World to save her, and unlike Iroh he succeeds… but what does Azula look like post-Spirit World shenanigans?

… Yeah, okay, fake!Azula calling anyone her “little angels” is just proof of how IC she is, if you had any doubts still.

But isn’t it FUNNY. Isn’t it HILARIOUS. That Azula not only undergoes an atom-deep brainwipe that turns her into a flat non-character, but that after dying she’s revived with WHITE HAIR, dressed in blue clothes and whatnot…?

My interpretation, and honestly, I don’t know if there’s any other possible interpretation… Jackie Diaz wanted Sokka to be with Yue :’) She fucking wrecked Azula’s character to turn her into a fake!Azula, who would eventually turn into fake!Yue after being resurrected because oh that’s just perfect to close off Sokka’s storyline, isn’t it? Only, he’s not with Yue nor with Azula because it’s neither of them. Just as it isn’t really Sokka either, or Katara, or Zuko or Aang or Toph.

Now, revisiting this trainwreck, there is a throwaway line where Ty Lee, in her (I think) only appearance in the story tells Katara that Suki and Sokka broke up. So um, Suki does exist, officially, in this comic, and she did date Sokka but it ended, and she’s back in Kyoshi Island with her team. 

Which elicits the question… why the fuck is she Mai’s maid?

I assure you, if you decide to delve deeper into this mess, you’ll absolutely find a lot more things to laugh about, to be outraged about, and to facepalm about while you wonder how on earth would someone, ANYONE, create something like this and not die of cringe looking at the finished product. It’s baffling to me.

At any rate, if you’d like to torture your own eyeballs reading this comic for yourself, there’s a Tumblr blog that gathered HIBY perfectly neatly for all curious eyes eager to torture themselves with this OOC fest. If you want more details than I care to remember about this catastrophic mess of a story, there’s always the TV Tropes page, which I think illustrates everything rather well. 

So… that’s HIBY. While I don’t think it should be sentenced to oblivion (we had best never forget the lowest lows the fandom has reached, else someone might be tempted to outdo them), this particular fanwork is quite the trainwreck in just about every regard. I really don’t think there’s anything worth salvaging in it. So, if you wanna read the whole thing (I’d be surprised if you would xD), knock yourself out in the blog link I posted up there. Otherwise, have a nice day if you still can after reading my answer to your ask :’D

#anon #hiby #granted by the time I arrived here #this shitshow had already been done and gone for a while #so I had to ask too #but I saw more signs of it than I suspect most people do these days #which is honestly... a wonder #I'm happy for it #let the fandom be cleansed of the dark stain that is this garbage comic

[go-hux-yourself]

Haruspex

I’m back at it with my bullshit haha :D This came about as an idea from this post about the hero showing up on the villain’s doorstep, and I kind of went with it :D

Also on my ao3 here :) My masterlist archive of bullshit i write can be found linked at the top of the blog or here.

--

His door chimed.

No one ever came to his personal quarters on this ship; or at least, not without being expected.

Hux was not expected. But it wasn’t nearly as big a shock as the state of the man himself.

“I didn’t know where else to go…” Hux muttered as he shouldered his way into Ren’s personal quarters without pretense despite the hour. Ren didn’t even try to stop him, so startled by this uncharacteristic aura of--

Well, confidence certainly wasn’t the word he was looking for. Not for the state of mind Hux appeared to be in. There were heavy bags under the general’s eyes, his uniform was rumpled, hair loose about his head, and a sort of hunted gleam shone in his eyes where there was usually cool disdain. He looked like a man possessed, and the desperation was rolling off him in waves.

“Something is-- Someone is messing with my head. With their damned force nonsense, or something to that end. I need you to make it stop.”

Ren frowned, at both the assumption, and the fact that Hux was actually asking him for help. The fact he assumed it was something force-related-- not the byproduct of too much caf and not enough sleep- and wasn’t immediately accusing Ren of being the perpetrator, was also interesting. “What makes you think someone is using the force against you?”

“It’s the logical conclusion,” Hux brushed off quickly, green eyes jumping about the room as if trying to search out some relief locked inside the durasteel walls. His gaze settled on Ren. His fingers twitched at his sides, gloveless. His hands looked cold. “Now please, just-- Work your magic or whatever it is you do, and make it stop.”

Ren frowned again. Hux never said please to him. He had to pause and center himself for a moment, and make sure this wasn’t some dream, or that he hadn’t gone too deeply into meditation and was in some weird force-hallucination that included his co-commander.

Ren didn’t feel any disturbance in the force, either around them, or from Hux himself. And Hux looked like he’d been on the tail end of extended stim use. Either that, or he was truly unhinged by some rogue variable that required Ren’s intervention. “When was the last time you slept, General?”

Hux gave him what surely couldn’t be a hurt look, but then, the man did look exhausted, and was clearly distressed if he’d come knocking on his rival’s door for help.

“I’m not crazy,” Hux stated softly with deadly calm, stopping his idle fidgeting and observances of the other man’s quarters.

“I didn’t say you were,” Ren stated, though the implication was there.

Hux was bleeding anxiety, the usually-composed man clearly frayed at the ends. That Hux sought out Ren’s help spoke to a many magnitude of things; mainly that he was more concerned with this potential ‘thing’ tormenting him than appearing weak to the man that could usurp his position.

Such a thought was a novelty Ren wanted to believe in. That Hux was exposing a potential vulnerability to Ren for exploitation-- and trusting that he wouldn’t do so in his plea for help- struck something inside the other man. That he considered Ren worth trusting at all, let alone with what was most certainly delicate information, was throwing Ren through all kinds of loops.

No one confided secrets to the knight. No one shared weakness with a literal mind-reader. If anything, people tried to throw up mental barriers against him, if they had the will for one.

Hux was one of those. But right now, he wanted the exact opposite, and it was a strange kind of power-rush for Ren, one he-- oddly enough- didn’t want to exploit. This was interesting enough on its own to merit helping the other man out.

Ren indicated his spartan couch, and Hux followed the gesture with tired eyes. “Sit down,” Ren instructed. “And tell me what I’m looking for.”

“I don’t know,” Hux told him with frustration, but he did take a seat, clasping his pale hands in his lap. His posture was straight, but forced. He was so damn exhausted it was a struggle to even keep what little composure he had left. “If I knew what was causing it, I’d have told you already.”

Hux tried to glower up at him as Ren stood before him, but the look only came off as pitiful. Ren considered his options, and decided that he would know what he was looking for if and when he encountered it within Hux’s mind. The general didn’t necessarily need to know he was going in completely blind. “What is it you’re experiencing?” Hux’s lips pursed into a thin line, reluctant. “Regardless of what you might assume about me, I’m not privy to your every waking thought, General.”

“Flashbacks,” Hux admitted, meeting Ren’s eyes defiantly with his own. “I’m seeing flashbacks.”

It sounded like he might need a trip down to medical with a psych-droid instead of a force-user, but Ren wasn’t going to pass up this opportunity to see inside the other man’s mind unhindered. The recent incursions on neutral-planets hadn’t strained the general, as far as Ren knew. And Hux hadn’t seen action on a battlefield in person since at least before Ren had come to the Finalizer. Whatever was causing him to lose sleep must be quite a thing indeed.

It wasn’t something he’d have trouble finding, anyways, as far as he was concerned. Whatever disturbing moments of galactic-warfare that was keeping Hux up at night, he knew he could wipe them from the general’s mind, or at least block them to the same end result.

“You must open your mind to me, if I’m to be successful.”

“Fine, yes. Consider it open. Just. Silence it, Ren.”

Hux’s choice of words almost brought a smile twitching to Ren’s lips. He was to be the silencer of these thoughts, just as the ship he piloted held the same name. He wondered if Hux had somehow strung those thoughts together and that’s how he’d ended up at Ren’s door specifically. It didn’t matter, he supposed, and he could probably find out from Hux’s own mind if he were curious enough.

Ren held out a hand, feeling with the force while Hux watched him and considered whether or not this was too great a risk to end his suffering; if Ren would somehow exploit this, meddle with his thoughts, warp his mind or do him even further harm under guise of assistance. Ren put down his hand and watched as Hux’s brow creased in response to the action. “This would be easier if you didn’t fight me, General.”

“I’m not fighting,” Hux affirmed stubbornly, frustrated and tired beyond belief and suddenly very fearful that this calculated risk was about to backfire and he’d get no relief. Ren didn’t need to be a mind-reader to know that. “Please,” Hux asked softly, the note in his voice plaintive, “I’m so kriffing exhausted.”

That was a word he’d heard from the general twice tonight, and it made him more determined to actually see this through to a good outcome. Ren raised his hand again, watching the other man. “It might be easier if you close your eyes.” Hux scoffed, but did exactly that as he sat there with his hands still folded over one another in his lap.

Hux’s impressive mental wall easily crumbled before Ren’s own focus, and it was shocking how quickly the general’s mind folded to his circumspection, leaving Ren with a very open picture indeed.

Hux was terrified. Or, some version of himself some twenty years back was. These weren’t the flashbacks he was looking for, nor did he expect to be immediately assaulted by them as he rifled through the general’s mind. Memories, Ren realized. Disjointed thoughts all with the same message of failure failure failure.

There were many of them. So many that he wondered how the general had been commanding the ship with such things blaring in his consciousness like an emergency klaxon. These were almost nightmares, but were once Hux’s reality, and the knight tried not to focus too hard on any single one lest he get pulled in and sidetracked.

Once Ren got past one, there was another, and then another bleeding into its place like a deck of flimsi cards, all in the background of Hux’s own consciousness that kept telling himself to ignore it-- that this was dead and done, that he wasn’t that boy anymore- and the pitiable self-assertion that he should be over this by now.

Hux’s incapability was literally haunting him. Torment long scarred-over was turned into fresh wounds again. It was a particularly cruel piece of work, one Ren wanted to remember for his own interrogation techniques, but it wasn’t impossible to find where the mental suggestion to revisit these old wounds had been hidden.

It was minor, as far as force-suggestions went, but very effective indeed. It wasn’t difficult for Ren to snuff out the suggestion, wondering who put it there in the first place, and the assault on Hux’s consciousness was gone like smoke wisps.

Hux was in a kind of dazed trance, exhausted and near-sleep, but trying to remain alert. The sudden lack of painful memories being thrust upon him was so relieving that Hux’s posture bodily relaxed. Ren watched him, feeling and seeing the relief there, and considered things about the other man he hadn’t thought of before.

This couldn’t be allowed. Whoever was responsible for planting the suggestion inside the general’s head was dangerous.

Such a subtle use of the force would be ineffective against him, but to force-nulls like Hux, it could bring the mightiest commanders into disarray if applied in the right places. And someone had known exactly where to attack Hux.

The fact that Ren had found anything at all inside his head made him justify keeping a close watch on the general, and it was barely a suggestion whispered into the other man’s mind before Hux tipped over into much-needed sleep.

--

Ch. 2 and others will be found on the ao3 post :)

--

kofi | ao3

#kylux #armitage hux #kylo ren #star wars fanfic #kylux fanfic #i love me some hurt/comfort so we're going there hard YES #bottom hux #top kylo ren #im so tired ill just be brief: if you like it plz think about leaving me a comment! I THRIVE ON THEM XD #im still baby-new to the fandom but we shall grow my archive oh yes

[movementofsound]

OH, ROSE

Favourite Song:  25, Alive

Be Kind To Me.

Personal Background: 

I initially found out about Oh, Rose from something the Future Islands twitter account retweeted, they had just released the their single ‘25, Alive’ and oh boy. This is a song that was heavily influenced by the passing away of lead singer Olivia Rose’ mother and speaks of grief and how powerful, negative emotions often culminate in anger. My own mum was pretty sick a few years ago now, and I guess part of me can identify with the powerlessness you experience when faced with something you cannot change. Between numerous trips to the hospital and having to go a pretty long period of time with none of doctors being able to say exactly what was wrong, powerlessness and anger are pretty dominant emotions in your life. I think this might be the first time I’ve cried writing one of these blog posts and sometimes I wonder if I get too personal when I write them, but I think personal experiences shape our experience of and interaction with music. I believe it wouldn’t be fair for me to write about music that I feel strongly about when my own personal circumstances are what gave the music meaning to me, if that makes any sense. But anyway, back to the band. Needless to say, after I heard ‘25, Alive’ I absolutely had to hear more from this band. There was also a really stunning interview between Olivia Rose and John Richards on KEXP radio a little while back now in which they spoke about ‘death and music’ (once again I was reminded that so many brilliant artists are so humble and pure and so, so kind) and the strong connection that exists between our experiences of death and music. I think it has a lot to do with the memories we form around music and I think something about this sentiment explains why people are so obsessed with the music they want played at their funeral, because music can describe you as a person and express things you no longer can. My aunt has been dead around ten years now, but without doubt if I hear the song ‘Holding Back the Years’ by Simply Red I will think of her, because that was her song, and that was one of the songs played at her funeral.

Judgement:

I can’t think of just one genre I can use to define the music Oh, Rose makes, its so diverse without deviating too far from their main components. The instrumentation remains largely the same for their later releases, with Olivia Rose as the lead vocalist and guitarist, Sarah Redden on synth, Kevin Christopher on bass, and Liam Hindahl on drums; all of whom are incredibly talented. I guess a large part of any change in Oh, Rose’s sound from their first release ‘A Date at The Guest House’ - which was recorded in one take over one night - to their most recent album ‘While My Father Sleeps', would be growth. Growth, development and a kind of analysis of reality seems to be a common theme in Oh, Rose’s music, their songs ‘Baby’, 'Luke Rose’ and ‘Prom’ seem to focus on the idea of generational relationships between family members, as well as personal growth and the understanding of the individual. Whereas tracks such as ‘Harrypotterjuana’ and ‘Politics’ seem to look at the individual and their interaction with the world around them, whether it be through the need to escape throughout life, from books to recreational drug usage, or the idea that growing up leaves you exposed to the harsh realities of life and the feeling of wanting to stay young to avoid that. Needless to say, an essential part of Oh, Rose’s unique sound is due to the vocals, there is an haunting element to the way Olivia Rose sings and her vocal range is phenomenal, and yet despite this the instrumentation remains clearly audible, layered, and progresses throughout most of their songs, rather than remaining static or repetitive. This also makes it more noticeable when the instruments slow down or stop altogether in order to bring attention solely to the vocals. For example, around a minute into their song ‘Seven’ all instrumentation pauses whilst Olivia Rose’s voice builds up, finally resuming as she reaches the highest note of that line. Speaking of which, Olivia Rose is so, so talented, her vocals occasionally border on spoken word for some of their songs, like ‘Politics’, or mimic a child-like baby voice that almost sounds like whining in the song ‘Baby’. Whereas at other times her voice is shrill and almost screaming, much like the cathartic outburst of anger we all experience sometimes, like the screaming on the beach idea in Daughter’s music video for ‘How’. The way sound expresses emotion is made extremely clear through this band’s releases.

Bonus Point:

I feel that Olivia Rose is vulnerable in a way that is both beautiful and tragic without being sad, and I’m grateful she managed to find people she can identify with and that help her use music as a safe, creative outlet for her emotional experiences.

P.P.S

I think this might be my longest post yet and I still feel like I have so much to say somehow, so this might be a topic I will revisit at a later date.

#oh rose #olivia rose #indie #alternative #music #blog #music blog #indie rock

[siiinfvl]

ooc. mic test.   hello.   anybody home ??   is this working ??   

HI !!!   i know, i know. some of you are either going,   ‘ who tf is this potato ?? ’   or    ‘ huh. didn’t know she was still alive. ’   or don’t care at all. but surprise !!!    i am actually still alive. 

i’m aware that it’s been about half a year, or maybe more, since the last time i have properly been here. and considering that i didn’t really post a hiatus notice, it just seems like i dropped off the face of the earth and would never be coming back. but to those who are wondering, bless your souls, you wonderful, caring people. i am still here. i do still lurk around, like some stuff, check out what’s been going on while i was gone. 

basically, like always, i’ve just been very busy with work. nothing new, i know. but recently, in the past two months, i have been missing writing here. don’t get me wrong, i’ve never stopped writing and never really disconnected with my muse. i’ve mostly been on discord, mainly writing with @shewassoferal. and even sometimes opening a word document to write some back stories or simple paragraphs from prompts, all for grant ward. 

but, like i said, i have been missing writing here. or even just being here in general. that being said, i am on the verge of a decision. this blog, as of today, is officially being REVAMPED. now, what happens after the revamp, what you will see after the revamp, i still have not decided yet. and if anyone would put their two cents in, i’d really, really, really appreciate it very much as it would help me make my decision. 

there are three ways this could go, and here they are: 

OPTION 001. i can revamp the page. remodel the theme, revisit my tags, update all the character pages, such as the verses, the biography page and whatnot, all to have a fresh feel to the blog in order to help this restart take off. 

post-revamp will then include rechecking all the memes on my inbox and working on them. i am well aware i have maybe half a hundred various items in my inbox raging from random starters or memes sent by you guys that i owe you. basically, what happens after revamp is that i’ll have to drop the ongoing threads as just thinking about them is already pressuring me a lot. for those who have a running thread with me and would like to continue, please let me know and we can maybe start a new thread along that same timeline and plot line, so we can keep interacting. now all those open starters and memes that i have yet to respond to, i will write those. since i have not posted those before, they still have a pretty solid fresh feel to me, even though they’ve been there for about half a year. again, my apologies on that, you guys. you know i love you and i really appreciate the stuff you write for me. life has just been hard recently. 

bottomline is that option one means i’ll do a sweep of old stuff, keep working on what feels new, and go back to what this blog was half a year ago, before my unannounced hiatus.

OPTION 002. this one entails that the blog will become a database blog. what does that mean ??   it means i’d revamp the whole page, complete all character pages that give information about the muse. update the verses, rules, bio, tag pages. 

and with that completed, my roleplaying will be moved to discord. i’m not sure if you guys still write there, but i do. and if anyone wants to write with me there, we can. does that mean this blog will be dead ??    no.   i would still be posting here. back stories, metas, gifsets and photosets will still be posted here. i will still be posting memes as well, and if we haven’t plotted or interacted before, you’re free to send a meme, so we can check the dynamic between our muses, and we can plot based off of that. and once it’s all fleshed out, i’d probably ask if we could move it over to discord. of course, you can say no. if it’s more advisable for you to be here, i can be here. 

basically, this option just means that there will be less activity here than option one as most activity will be on discord. 

OPTION 003. now, this one is a bit heavier. i do understand that it’s been a long time since i have been here. a lot of the people i used to interact with might have even left already. the muse hasn’t been on the show for three seasons now, and just fyi, i am no longer watching the show. apart from that, i know that there are, at least, a couple of other grant ward blogs that have remained active while i was gone. beautifully-written, beautifully-shaped grant ward muses that i hearteye every time i see on my dash. this means that my heart is at ease in the fact that the character is still getting the love and the understanding he deserves that, sadly enough, the show did not give him. i am at ease in the fact that there are still amazing writers out there that are lending voice to this character that we did not get to hear the real voice of in the show. 

with that said, option three entails that this blog will no longer participate in roleplaying. does this mean this blog will die or be deleted ??    hell, no.   i still love the muse and the character and the actor too much to do that. so what’s gonna happen is that there will be no roleplaying, but any metas, gifsets, photosets will still be posted here. considering that i also still have a lot of ideas in mind that i’d like to write in order to expand on grant’s PHOENIX verse   ( which is his main verse, where he put up his fake hydra to destroy it from the inside and made it his own organization once hydra has been fully destroyed --------- all in the name of his definition of closure. for kara, and himself )   and depending on how things go, i might even put up a separate blog for PHOENIX. you guys have no idea how big that world has become in my head despite not getting to post about it much here. @shewassoferal can, once again, attest to that. you might see some fanfics being posted as well.

so, all in all, while i might say goodbye to the world of roleplaying on this blog, you still will not be saying goodbye to me permanently. awwww. i will still be around, and if you wanna write something together, maybe collab on something, i’m just here, you can let me know, and we’ll work it out.

that’s the dilemma i’m on right now. i have not decided which track this blog is going to take. mainly because while i want to go one way, i’m not sure if it’s even possible because, like i said, i do understand that i have been absent for a long time and people might not even want to write with me anymore. so i need your help in deciding. i need to know where this blog stands, and i need your assistance. 

in case i don’t receive any response, the default will be the third option. but if you still want to write with me, and one of the first two options appeal to you, then you can let me know, and i’ll work on it right away.

each and every one of your opinions matter to me. so if there’s even just one person that chose either one of the first two options, the third one is already out of the running, which means i’ll be back. the decision between options 1 and 2 will then be decided based on how many people are willing to do it with me. 

thank you very much if you’ve reached this part. i appreciate you reading all of it. you are a rockstar !!!

#* * / / offline ( ooc ) #( and now i sit here #unsure if it's the right hour to be posting this #if people are even still awake #but eh #at least i'm getting this out of the way #i have been procrastinating for so long #no matter the outcome #at least i have a decision #the ever indecisive me #will have a decision #that's such an accomplishment u guys #u don't even know #but anyway #***kisses*** )

[holden-woods]

task 001: the interrogation

Holden was admittedly nervous, and he was sure it was apparent given the constant bobbing of his knee and the amount of times he’d cleared his throat upon entering the room. He felt foolishly out of place in his attire. His mother had insisted upon a neatly pressed blue shirt, tucked into slacks as if giving the appearance of a preppy, rich boy might save him from any stereotypes they might have formulated about him. But sitting there before him, masquerading as someone he was not as proving to be harder than he had anticipated, despite the fact that his father had prepped him in the car ride to the station, filling his head with law jargon and once more demanding to speak with DA on his behalf. The conversation had only nourished the anxiety that had been trickling in his veins since the moment he tore open his letter. He was ready to get this over with, eyes fixated blankly upon the camera recording him, wondering what the audience would think of him. It’s always the boyfriend, current or ex. Fake or real. That’s what they’re thinking, they’re thinking I did it. He swallowed the lump in his throat, and tried his best to look placid but he could feel the sweat gathering within the palms of his hands. And then it began.

Of course it was the first question the police would ask, another thing his father had warned him of. Don’t fucking lie, they already know everything, his fathers words were ringing in his head as he sucked in a deep breath to prepare an answer. The pair of officers were sifting through his record, a manila envelope with his name in neatly typed letters, glancing up at him expectantly, waiting for him to either lie or confess the truth… Not that there was much of a choice. “I mean, kind of? I would get myself into some fuckin— Sorry, I got into trouble a lot as a kid. Caught twice for vandalizing my school property at fifteen and sixteen. Small stuff, like spray-painting over murals, and defiling statues of the founder,” he admitted, his words coming out breathlessly as he focused on a spot on the wall above Officer Grant’s head. A public speaking technique that often allowed him to quell his nerves, though it seemed to be offering no help now. “My parents own an apartment up in Manhattan. I sometimes go there during my breaks. I got… A little intoxicated one night and lost my wallet. Didn’t have cash for a cab so I jumped the turnstile. Charged with theft of services. I got off with a ticket, but I was detained for the night and it’s on my record,” Holden further explained, pants gripping at his knees, wiping the bit of sweat that had accumulated upon the fabric of the soft gray fabric.

“What is your connection to Daisey? How did you know her? How well did you know her?”

Daisey. How does one limit their connection to her within a neat little sentence, simple and kosher enough to be digested by the police department and the public? Holden had known Daisey from the time he’d moved to Ashmont when he was ten. She’d always been a glamorous background character in his life, rich and beautiful. There had been a time when he’d wanted nothing more but to receive her approval, her attention but once he’d gotten he’d realized what a heavy burden it was to bear. Daisey was a world all on her own, and Holden lacked the strength of Altas. In an effort to get her way, she clawed her way into his life and marked him as hers, even if it had been for show. Holden had been one of her trophies, a living breathing one… And he loathed her for it, not only for constraining him but for the havoc she caused upon everyone around him, everyone he’d managed to love.

He hadn’t realized how long it had been since he spoke, and Holden reached out weakly for the cup of water that had been placed before him as a courtesy to take a sip, and fill the silence with some kind of action as their stare burned holes in his skin. “I knew her… Like, I guess almost half my life now? Huh, how weird is that? We went to all the same schools, she did cheer and I did football so we went to all the same parties too. She was beautiful and popular and I guess…” he began to trail off, unsure of how to explain the next bit to them. “I guess you could say we dated for a time. Not seriously or anything, but there was a couple of months where we’d spend a good chunk of time with one another. Dinners, parties, dances, you name it. We were there, together,” Holden licked his lips, as he thought back at the time they had shared together, of how empty it had been. The ploy had been for her to build buzz and interest for herself, and he himself was just the pretty face to get her there. “But I didn’t know her well. Daisey wasn’t someone who opened up and told you what she was thinking. You were always left guessing, it was kind of part of the fun for her, and sometimes for you. She liked being in control in that way,” he added swiftly, eyes dropping down to his lap as he remembered her smile. It was always widest when pulling off a scheme.

“Have you visited the blog site “veritasexposed”? If you have, how credible do you find the information on this site? Do you know who runs the website?”

Holden should have realized that the site was going to be added into evidence eventually, but he certainly was struck with surprise when he was posed the question. He had assumed that everyone was quivering with fear, too intimidated to bring attention to the blog, as if informing the authorities might send this anonymous mad man into a fit of rage, resulting in all of their dirty laundry being aired. Everyone he knew was playing this close to the chest, waiting quietly for their own d-day, thankful when their friends were chosen and not themselves… “Everyone with wifi’s been on that site around here, especially since everyone’s been named. It could all be bullshit, you know? Like empty threats, because I doubt that many people have earth-shattering secrets like this blog claims. As for the information, I really couldn’t tell you if it was true or not. Zephyr and Jonah both seemed to own up to their secrets, so I guess that means there’s some credibility there, right?” he rambled, shoulders coming up half-heartedly up to a shrug as he concentrated on the looks on their faces, the good cop and the bad cop. Their expressions were unreadable, blank. “I wish I knew who ran the site. I think it would cause all my roommates to sleep better. Everyone’s been kind of on edge about it. But no, I really don’t have the slightest of clues.” 

“Do you remember where you were the night Daisey went missing? If so, where were you? What were you doing? Who were you with?”

The night Daisey had vanished was something Holden remembered vividly. Not simply because it was pivotal for the town, but because the events leading up to Daisey’s disappearance had been so painfully kind to him. It was fall, and he’d just received his letterman jacket for the season that very day. Crisp and new he could remember slipping into it, signifying a bright beginning to a brand new season. He could make out the smell of the blueberry pancakes he’d made for himself in quiet anticipation for the football later on that night. He’d even recalled how he found himself drenched with gratitude for his luck when they'd won the first game of the season. It was a small high, the little things he’d lived for. Pulling his helmet off his head at the end of the game, he could clearly remember thinking how he could swim in this day forever, grinning excitedly at his teammates, his arm resting around the shoulders of his best friend. It was all so perfect, even the party. It’d felt exceedingly normal. The loud music, the badly played beer pong, the kisses exchanged with a stranger who’s name he failed to remember. Absolutely perfect… That was until he’d waken up to the news.

“I was at the game, I play on the football team. After that, I drove myself to the party. I didn’t go home that night, I stayed at Cap’s house cause y’know— No drinkin’ and driving, right?” he asked, almost jokingly with a jittery chuckle falling out of him before he could manage to stop it. The officers did not bother cracking a smile at his joke, and Holden’s face grew serious once more. “As for what I was doing, I was mostly drinking. The dude has a pool out in the back, so at one point I went for a night swim with a girl I met that night. Don’t know her name, she went to another school… Dried off, drank some more, passed out on his couch with her and almost everyone else with any kind of social life at St. E’s,” Holden disclosed, hands reaching up to adjust the collar of his shirt which felt a bit too tight, fingers shifting down to pop open a button in a small effort to relax himself.

“Where were you the night Daisey’s body was recovered?”

“I was serving time… But for school, y’know with the curfew and stuff,” Holden responded, leaning back into his seat. “They had those of us who broke the rule work at the carnival. I was assigned to bumper cars, so I was faithfully performing my duties as bumper car minion for the university,” he could feel his knee jump back up under the table. The nervous tick had revisited him at the morbidity of the question. He’d always forget that it was real, that she was dead, until they used the most callous of words. Murdered, body, dead. Hours of binging CSI had not adequately coached Holden enough for this moment, for what the murderer had done to everyone in this town. “I found out pretty quick though. Word travels fast when everyone knows everyone. Kinda put a damper on the carnival and the whole thing seemed inappropriate… So we packed up and left after that.”

“How familiar are you with the Ashmont woods? Have you been there often? Have you recently ventured out here? If so, why?”

The truth of the matter was, Holden had indulged in far too many horror films to ever venture into the woods. Despite being twenty-one years old, he could not fathom why anyone would have the desire to disappear amongst the trees and expose themselves to whatever goblins, ghouls, and ghosts probably lived out there. Plus, he absolutely hated bugs, which the forest was coated in from top to bottom. “Not familiar at all. I was always a chicken-shit. My dad was always telling us these gross campfire stories and my mom is weird, her favorite movie is It and that was always playing in the background at home, god only knows why. I had an over-active imagination as a kid because of it, and the forest just represented everything that could go wrong. Even driving by at night is… Kinda creepy. If I’m going to the supermarket past a certain hour, I usually have to bring my best friend with me, so I have some sort of distraction. Gives me the fucking creeps,” Holden confessed, fidgeting nervously in his seat at the mere thought of the woods, and what every Blair Witch Project shit went down there. “I don’t go often, I don’t go at all. I honestly haven’t made it down there since I was like, maybe eleven.”

“Do you have feelings towards the investigation? Any comments?”

Holden pulled the lukewarm glass of water towards him once more, watching the ripples within the glass fizzle out as he wracked his brain for an any semblance of a comment. Anything that might make him appear as though he were genuinely interested in this trial outside of trying to worm his way off their suspect list. “I hope you catch whoever did it obviously,” he replied dumbly, before taking another swig of water and carefully placing the glass back down upon the table. “And I hope that you catch whoever’s running the fucking blog too. It’s really spooking us out.”

“Do you have any people you feel the police should look into? Please, let us know who and why.”

The final comment felt strange to Holden, almost as if they were encouraging him to throw someone under the bus. He nearly wanted to sit up straighter and act more fearless, ask them why they were insisting he do their job for them. Instead, he remained meek, once more fixated on the spot above Officer Grant’s head, teeth ripping at a piece of dry skin stuck on his lower lip, a familiar metallic taste forming in his mouth. “No. There’s no one I know personally that I think is capable of doing this. I think you should look outside of her circle, or what you think to be her circle. Daisey had friends everywhere. Bet it’s some sick Wall Street fuck or something who got bored of his wife.”

#veritastask001 #tasks #i honest to god don't even know what this is its trash #i wanted him to be FUN but he was just like pls don't JAIL ME I AM AN INNOCENT

[patternsintraffic]

My 100 Favorite Albums of the 2000s: #100-#91

Hi all. As you can tell from the title of this blog post, I am about to take you off on quite a tangent. Music is in the works (both the completion of Lights & Reflections and the first full-length Harsh Lights album), but currently I find myself sitting up into the early morning hours with a newborn while my wife tries to get some uninterrupted sleep. So I am taking the opportunity to finally post this ridiculously long-winded writing project that I embarked on last year. The actual list-making and blurb-penning has been done for many months now, but I never took the time to format and post it. So here I am with some free time, getting around to finishing this undertaking!

As you may have seen, I decided to join in the fun at the turn of the decade and make a list of my favorite albums from 2010-2019. I wrote about my top 20 albums of the decade, and had a blast revisiting those records and sharing a little bit about why they are special to me. However, the most surprising part of the process for me was that choosing 20 albums to represent that ten-year period was...pretty easy? I started my career in late 2009, so the entire past decade I've been working full-time, pursuing my own music in my spare time, and more or less adulting. I've definitely listened to a ton of great albums, but it's hard to find music that truly excites you as an adult the way that it did in your formative years. The whole time I was crafting my list, I was thinking about how much more difficult (and rewarding) a task it would have been to compile a list for the previous decade, spanning 2000-2009.

So of course, not long after posting my 2010-2019 list I got to work compiling my favorite albums of the aughts. That 10-year period starts when I was 12 years old and wraps up as I was starting my post-college career. Pretty much my entire journey of musical discovery and growth occurred during those years. I had little in the way of responsibilities, and for most of the decade I ravenously consumed an absolutely enormous amount of music. Multiple hours worth on an average day. I was still buying physical CDs all throughout those years, so I really focused on each album I purchased, giving them many repeat listens and learning them intimately. And so much of what I heard was new and fresh to my ears. At 12 years old, there were so many sounds and styles of music that I had yet to encounter, and all of those first experiences and coming of age moments left lasting impressions.

Suffice to say, putting together a top 20 list of albums to represent that 10-year period was nearly impossible. I knew I would have to make a larger list to feel like I was doing justice to even a fraction of the albums that impacted me in that decade. What I eventually arrived upon after making an initial list of albums and then cutting it down quite a bit...was 100. Yes, I'm going to write about my favorite 100 albums from 2000-2009. And I'm going to have a damn good time doing it. Most of my favorite albums ever will be contained in this list, and most of them are wildly underappreciated, in my opinion. For the sake of keeping each post to a manageable length, I will be posting 10 albums at a time, starting with numbers 100-91 below. Walk with me down memory lane in countdown form, and I hope you can enjoy me waxing poetic about 100 albums that were staples of my young life. Let's get nostalgic.

100. Paris Texas - Like You Like an Arsonist (2004)

There are hundreds of albums that I could have picked to round out my list here in the final spot, but I wanted to shine a light on this poppy punk rock record from 2004. It doesn't do anything particularly groundbreaking, but it's a really fun take on the genre and it didn't get the recognition that it deserved. "Bombs Away" and the title track are absolute barnburners. What a shame that the band broke up shortly after this album was released. I remember reading a review of Like You Like an Arsonist around the time of its release that criticized it for sounding like a collection of songs that could blend seamlessly into the soundtrack of a blockbuster action movie. Looking back, I agree with the reviewer's assessment, but I see it as high praise.

99. Greenwheel - Soma Holiday (2002)

In 2002, you could throw a shoe and hit a band that sounded much like Greenwheel, a radio-ready alternative rock outfit with some heavy riffs and a throaty lead singer. But these guys stood above many of their contemporaries on Soma Holiday, their only major label release. (Their independent EP Bridges for Burning and never-released second full-length Electric Blanket both hinted at a sustainable career that didn't come to fruition.) This album had enough muscle for the rock kids ("Shelter" and "Strong") and enough sweetness for the emo kids ("Dim Halo" and "Breathe," which was later recorded and popularized by Melissa Etheridge). What could have been.

98. Sleeping at Last - Ghosts (2003)

It's been almost 10 years since Sleeping at Last became a solo project for Ryan O'Neal, releasing themed singles that make up overarching concept albums and EPs. Though the output from the current incarnation of the band is beautiful and soothing, the minimalist and orchestral style is a far cry from Ghosts, Sleeping at Last's one major label album. At the time they were a three-piece featuring guitars, bass, and drums alongside O'Neal's piano and distinct vocals. Ghosts features an uncommon blend of cinematic, ethereal, and earnest indie rock that just seemed to go deeper than its peers in 2003.

97. Taking Back Sunday - Where You Want to Be (2004)

I've never been a huge fan of Taking Back Sunday, though of course I rocked the singles from Tell All Your Friends like any self-respecting high-schooler in 2002. It was the follow-up, 2004's Where You Want to Be, that really got its claws in me after I picked it up on release week. With a killer opening trio of "Set Phasers to Stun," "Bonus Mosh Pt. II," and "A Decade Under the Influence" giving way to ballads like "New American Classic" and "...Slowdance on the Inside," this is just a great rock record.

96. Sherwood - A Different Light (2007)

A Different Light is a bright, summery, buoyant pop album full of smooth vocal harmonies, glistening guitars, and shimmering synths. Sure, the lyrical content isn't all rainbows and butterflies, but if you could capture the sound of pure positivity and optimism, it would sound a lot like this record. Between the singalong melodies, handclaps, and "whoa-oh"s, if you don't have a good time listening to A Different Light then music might not be the right medium for you.

95. Young Love - Too Young to Fight It (2007)

I'm fairly certain that Young Love, the dance-rock side project of beloved post-hardcore band Recover's frontman Dan Keyes, was not at all well-received. But for someone with no preconceived notions or attachments to Keyes' previous work, I thought this album was a hell of a lot of fun. In a world where Young Love made a mainstream impact, alternate-universe Kyle can be seen storming the dancefloor to the title track or "Discotech." Too Young to Fight It also gives us the smooth R&B of "Tell Me," the indie rock of "Take It or Leave It," and the experimental and apocalyptic "Tragedy." This is so much more than a dance album, and if it hadn't been released by a musician with strong ties to the hardcore scene it would have had a fighting chance of being recognized as such.

94. Vendetta Red - Sisters of the Red Death (2005)

Vendetta Red frontman Zach Davidson has one of the most dynamic hard rock voices I've ever heard, and Sisters of the Red Death is one of the catchiest rock records I've ever heard. Despite those facts, I have a complicated relationship with this album because of its often-horrifying lyrical content, which details acts of sexual violence and gore. That's usually a dealbreaker for me, but I won't completely write off this record since it is a concept album set in a post-apocalyptic fantasy world. Apparently female empowerment is at the core of the message, so it's not like Vendetta Red are condoning the acts that they're singing about. It's still a bit unnerving when you get the urge to sing along to one of the plethora of earworm melodies throughout this album and then realize exactly what you're singing. While I may not have the stomach for Sisters of the Red Death in 2021, I can still wholeheartedly recommend "Silhouette Serenade," which contains all of the awesomeness with none of the gross-out lyrics.

93. Ours - Distorted Lullabies (2001)

Now 20 years into his career, Ours frontman Jimmy Gnecco is surely tired of being compared to Jeff Buckley. But damn, he really does sound like Jeff Buckley. And when you're being compared to one of the all-time great voices in rock music, that's not such a bad thing. Distorted Lullabies is the first proper Ours album, and it's filled with melodic rock songs that highlight Gnecco's incredible range. As the saying goes, I could listen to Gnecco sing the phonebook (those were still around in 2001!), but put his powerful and emotive voice on dynamic rock songs like "Sometimes" and "Meet Me in the Tower"? Yes, please.

92. Armor for Sleep - What to Do When You Are Dead (2005)

This here is an emo concept album about a boy who commits suicide and his experience in the afterlife. Despite the overwrought subject matter, the songs on What to Do When You Are Dead are carefully crafted and interesting. "Car Underwater" is a scene classic, and my favorite track might be the keyboard-centric interlude "A Quick Little Flight." Armor for Sleep seemed a bit more thoughtful in their songwriting and arrangements than many of their contemporaries.

91. Cauterize - Paper Wings (2005)

The single "Something Beautiful" led me to Cauterize's 2003 major label debut So Far from Real, but upon purchasing the album I found that the rest of the tracks didn't live up to that song's high bar. Not so with the independently-released follow-up Paper Wings, which was just full of emo rock songs that I absolutely devoured in 2005. This was actually the first album that I had to order online because it wasn't sold in stores. I remember the surreal feeling of the CD showing up in the mailbox, and that first experience attached some additional meaning to Paper Wings. It doesn't hurt that it features propulsive songs like "Wake to the Sun," "Closer," and "Tremble." Cauterize later signed to another label and re-recorded most of these songs for Disguises, which rejiggered the tracklist and added a few new tunes. Even though the production might be a little better on Disguises, I always preferred the Paper Wings versions and the flow of the original tracklist. There's nothing like the first time.

#albums of the decade #best of the 2000s #top100 #countdown #nostalgia trip

[crystalnet]

My Top 10 Video Gamesss

I'm really bored so I'm just gonna do this, fuck it. Top 10 from a guy whose genre of choice is the action-(J)RPG, of which makes up about half this list. I'm gonna try to keep it pretty short and sweet, cuz like who cares, like why am I even doing this who cares. (Digibro says text-blogging is dead, like I need to make videos but like who would want to watch the video of some rando listing things either? Idk, like I don't really get any motivation for anything anymore. But I do like games/JRPGS soooo.... without further ado...). Also I'm doing a 1-game-per-franchise rule 'cuz otherwise it'd be largely Zelda and Final Fantasy because I have good taste, am sheepish and bland, and overly-content with the same 2 franchises. But yeah, I'm digging a little deeper here. 

1. Zelda Breath of the Wild-

This may seem risky, audacious and possibly even sacrilege to put a game that is only like 5 months old on this list, but really this is the only game that I could really confidently put on my top spot. I think this game is just about perfect, and even though its not technically my genre of choice, it comes pretty close to a JRPG, and yet feels more pure than that, and somehow even deeper in a way. I'm just astounded by everything from the mechanics, to the presentation to the flow of this game and more. But especially those things probably. The "flow" of this game for example feels so fucking organic and open-ended that it essentially feels like no other game I've ever encountered. You can wander for hours semi-aimlessly and still have an amazing time and work towards progress. 

The climbing/paragliding thing is just about the coolest mechanic I've ever seen or played in a game and works as a really amazing foundation for one of the underlying aspects of this game, which is sheer unadulterated exploration. And I was saying it somehow reminds of a JRPG even tho it's Zelda and that has everything to do with the deep item-management and collecting, the deep cooking/crafting system, and the huge array of weapons which all transform the combat from being vanilla-as-fuck as it was in previous console Zeldas (barring Skyward I suppose) to really cool, challenging and pretty dang deep, for a Zelda game at least. And that, along with so much of this, including the incredible different experimental non-linearity of it, make this unlike any other than Zelda save the first, revolutionary entry. A lot of the depth also has to do with the crazy deep physics. Did I mention the physics?? And though there's only like 5 dungeons (I easily count Hyrule castle, and this is not including 120 shrines and the various fortresses/mazes), they're really ace and easily rival my favorite Zelda dungeons in the way in which the structure of the dungeons must themselves be manipulated in order to solve their puzzles (my next top 5 is gonna be Top Zelda Dungeons btw..). 

So yeah, this game is just freakin' incredible and this iteration of Hyrule is probably my favorite game world of all time. Every inch of it is beautifully lit, realized, and filled to the brim with little puzzles, shrines, formidable foes and questing galore. Also the horses. The horses are sick. And yeah, climbing to the tops of mountains and paragliding down (or later using Revali's Gale to ascend rapidly) is the most free I've felt in a game since the weirdly amazing web-slinging in Spider-Man 2 (PS2). Also the difference between how weak and basic you feel at first to how you feel toward the end when you have the Master Sword, a crazy good arsenal of weapons that you've curated, all the spells and Shiekah slate magic and all the amiibo-dropped gear attained from an illegal/frowned-upon amiibo deck is freakin awesome and even cooler than the dynamic progression of something like Dark Souls. And the whole first 10-20 hours or so of a new file are especially “special” to me. Not that it gets less fun-- in many ways it gets more fun as you get more capable and experienced-- but the Plateau segment is a master class in tutorial segment design, and the way you learn to live off the land is kind of incredible... There’s this whole Buddhist-esque anti-attachment thing the game forces you to accept regarding early weapons breaking all the time that help make you depend so heavily on scavenging and exploring and always looking for more loot just so that you can survive. You really learn to live off the land, and well that’s beautiful. And everything about all the various mechanics and the world feel so holistic and cohesive and unified in a way that I just haven’t really seen before.  Anyway, yeah I could go on but I think that mostly sums it up. This is the only game where it feels like your actually exploring an amazing natural environment, but without like sore feet and bugs and being sweaty and stuff. It's just all the good stuff involved in taking in a crazy beautiful environ. I already said that but yeah. This game feels restorative, peaceful, meditative. And I never get sick of those lonely little piano chords. It's good. Perfect even. Really a masterwork for me. And the DLC is sweet to boot and still incoming, so yeah. Me likey.  2. Final Fantasy XV-

Where I feel really good picking BotW as my #1, and can do it without hesitation, and it's not even a tough call to make as my favorite entry of its respective franchise, this one is a bit more complex. And like a lot of FF fans would probably rightfully scoff and write me off right away, whereas Zelda fans would probably be more accepting of BotW as the top pick. Because it involves a shit ton of caveats. For one thing, deep deep down, FFXI will actually always be my favorite video game experience of all time. Always. Forever. Sorry not sorry BotW. But I'm not putting that one, because I feel like there's something weird about listing an MMO that I only played for 3 years as a child and can't really revisit in a real capacity. Its sealed in time and perhaps that's what makes it special. Sure I could get on one of the couple of PC servers still going but it wouldn't be the same. Another caveat is FFVII, IX, and XII (Zodiac Age!!) are all, to me, way classier and probably on a technical level "better" than XV. And yet, I'm kind of have this disease where 64-bit games have aged worse for me than any other gen, and while XII is fucking awesome (Zodiac!! ^.^;;), I don't have quite as much fun playing that as XV (though its pretty close...). Somehow, despite all its short-comings, FFXV almost perfectly captures the charm and joy of this series, and all my memories of it, while containing them within a fucking gorgeous-- immaculately so at that-- package that is super freakin' playable compared to older turn-based titles. Like, ATB/turn-based FF will always be more "legit" in a sense, but I can't deny I am an action-JRPG addict and this game hits the sweet-spot for me.

Did I mention how beautiful it is? While some might see the new fixation on open-worlds as kind of redundant-- and BotW has now kind of revealed the flaws in the old triple-A formula for them--, I think this is just a reeeeally good rendition of the "open-world" concept, which is something I always wanted in FF. And while you can't join in with other players like in XI and carve your own path in the world (multiplayer is coming though...), there is a certain feeling of freedom felt in this game that makes so many other FF titles seem so limited (lookin at you XIII). Also, pretty. It's pretttttty. And if BotW's Hyrule is my favorite game-map, Eos is my favorite world in terms of like lore, look, and design. It's freakin cool. It looks real and there are cars and there are modern-looking people like us but there's also crazy monsters, magic, teleportation, robots and evil empires (well those are real). And the monsters seem like something out of an otherworldly Nat. Geo. the way everything is so wonderfully detailed. Its freakin cool Dinotopia shit in this bitch. So yeah, while there are flaws-- notably of which are the lack of customization in character-progression that I love in games like XII Zodiac Age and with the kind of unrealized story which is spread mercilessly across an anime mini-series and OVA-- this game feels like a perfect monument to my favorite series of all time. And like you can play all Nobuo songs while exploring this amazing world. Like seriously that tiny little feature is what puts this over-the-top. Otherwise I might have honestly chosen IX or XII Zodiac Age 'cause they're classy AF and the RPG mechanics are deeper. But fuck it, when I play this, it's basically the best visualizer for an endless Nobuo Uematsu soundtrack I could imagine. And like Shimumura's new stuff is great on top of that. This point falls apart 'cuz I could just play an FF actually composed by Nobuo, but like this way it's like an endless loop of my personal favorite Nobuo. Nobuo... 

But anyway... Yeah I like the look, combat, magic, world, characters, chocobos, and the look again. Also the potential... I think multiplayer could be really, really cool honestly. So while it bears some of the issues all post-Enix-merger FF games have (like weirdly dropping parts of the plot which is like...why???, or the fact that they're having to patch it all year, and are adding stuff (can you say DLC $$$$)), it's still a minor masterpiece for me. And while not as deep, or even as charming as old PS1 FF or 16-bit FF, its just so damn playable. I'm not a good retro-gamer like other people-- I like my games new and bright/shiny, and this game is shiny AF. So yeah. I clearly have to defend the hell out of this, but fuck it, it's great. Like seriously the design of everything? Just walk around and like look at it. LOOK AT IT. Character models!!! Lighting!!! Facial animation and movement!!! Omg. Okay, yeah I'll leave it at that. Don't hate me. 3. Super Smash Bros Wii-

I feel like I don't even have to explain this one. This is quite simply the perfect multiplayer game. And as with BotW and FFXV, I like these latest iterations a lot, which may seem sheepish and like plebian-core but fuck it. Melee was reeeeally fun back in like 2008, but I'm not trying to play that rn. Robin all day. And Cloud?? So yeah, there's just something kind of endlessly sweet about a game where the likes of Mario, Pac-Man, Sonic, Megaman, Cloud, Ryu and... Bayonetta (??) all collide in a game with amazing physics, awesome platform-y freedom-of-movement and a deep competitive scene which almost make this seem like some kind of weird master-game. Like the Master Sword of games. An Einherjar/Valhalla of all videogame character of fame and fortune. So yeah, its great. I can't speak about it to it to the length I did with FF and BotW because I feel like it speaks for itself. Its just pure, unadulterated Nintendo/pan-franchise world-colliding fun. 4. Nier Automata-

Nier/Drakengard lore is fucking crazy, deep as hell, and multi-faceted AF and Yoko Taro is freeeeakin cool and the best game director this side of Hideo Kojima. And where the first Nier is an amazing, lovably imperfect game-- clunky combat, and weird genre-hopping and all-- this one is like freakin' awesome to play front-to-back. Unless you like don't like abruptly inserted bullet-hell segments. But the main combat is irrefutably sick, which is crazy. Platinum games took a reeeeally weird game-world and made it feel super slick despite all the amazing quirks that are inherent to Yoko Taro's games. Also this is one of my like top 5 maybe 3 game soundtracks of all time. It's amazing and reminds me of my favorite Yuki Kajiura soundtrack for .Hack//Sign. Is there a term for awesome vaguely medieval-ish female-vocal heavy mystic-sounding music? 'Cause this game has it in spades and it's freakin sweeeet. Alongside some like soulful adult-contemporary R'n'B ballads? Buy yeah, amazing-feeling combat, a plethora of combos and weapons, a solid amount of depth to character progression, and really fun bullet-hell segments make this game sooooo playable and maybe my favorite action-RPG of all time (FFXV doesn't quite feel like a true action-RPG?)

But then, on top of that it has an amazingly evocative story, with wonderfully dynamic characters who are lovingly revealed over the course of multiple play-through, in a an epic struggle that revels in the philosophy of Sartre, Kierkegaard, and Marx among others. That in itself is freakin' crazy. Games/anime/movies with AI characters or like androids can be so cliche in their exploration of existentialism, and this game can seem like its gonna be like that at first, but it ends up making good on its promises, and functions as just a really cool exploration of a rich philosophical tapestry. And it's all beautifully told, in these really nice semi-muted colors and with these super lovely character models. Plus the open-world is surprisingly great to run around. I love the over-grown human city thing, and the super atmospheric music come together with the aesthetic to make this game so emotional. Like honestly, along with other aspects of the story, this game is sooooo feels-heavy for me. It can be really sad, and there's this amazing dichotomy/friction between how fun it is to play, and how like strait-up bad it can make you feel sometimes. To like even play it. Getting into that would be spoiler-y and stuff, but yeah I'll kind of leave it to there. The story is awesome. 2B and 9S are amazing. The concepts and way this game actually effect you are super unique, and all the presentation-aspects bring it together so beautifully. It's just like... wow. Like play this game. then play it 5 times to get all the endings. 5. Metal Gear Solid V-

I almost have to make the same caveats I did for FFXV for this game as well. Yes, I know, it's not perfect. It partly represents like the downfall of this whole series, and the darker side of video-games in general. There's a pachinko-level pay-wall type thing inserted right into this and there's some behind-the-scene drama involved that strait-up led to Kojima's departure from Konami? (firing??) Idk, idc, I don't have the energy for that, honestly. So maybe I'm a horrible MGS fan, but I'll be damned if I don't love this game unabashedly. I first played it during a time when I had basically spent 5 years not playing any video games besides Smash, and it was an amazing reintroduction into the world of triple-A titles. Emergent gameplay. Openness. The most handsome character model of all time (Big Boss is my daddy). And that Asia song "Only Time Will Tell". Seriously-- something about the way that song synchs up with the feel of sneaking into an Afghani military outpost in the early 1980's any damn way you please is like the story of this game for me, and part of why it's on this list. That song is everything. Like in the context of this game that is. But also outside of it too? But yeah the sheer openness is just incredible. Not open in the same way like Skyrim or BotW is, but in terms of how you complete each and every mission. It feels like your writing the script to your own big action movie every time you set out. Like the game doesn't force anything on you. Did I mention Big Boss is fucking hot. 

And yeah, great music, gameplay and overall presentation, and the cool base-management stuff adds this really cool RTS-ish depth that fleshes out the game wonderfully. Add some solid online PVP, a sweet mech and the gatdamn coolest most open-ended stealth gameplay I'm aware of, and you have yrself a winner. Sorry old, classic MGS, I gotta go with the new model. It's just so damn playable. Like yeah, I know, Konami is like really bad, and fucked up, and like if I really respected Kojima maybe I wouldn't chose this one? But like man I can't help it. I love it soooo much, contemporary triple-AAA-developer-dysfunction and all. Oh and Asia. And the Pere Ubu "Man Who Saved the World". And "Take On Me". Honestly without the tape-collecting/playing this might not be included. But yeah, its clearly great.

6. Dark Souls- Idk, I'm not even a huge Souls guy but this game is kind of breathtaking. I got it for cheap and went in a skeptic, and remained that way for a decent chunk of it, but around the time I was getting to Sen's Fortress things started to click like crazy. This game is undeniable and I'll leave it to the plethora of well-made YouTube analyzers to really get into why. But for me, as far as action-RPGs go, this feels like it has some of the most legit customization and progression of any RPG I've played. It's got an amazing world, with the vertical-nature of the map and way that inter-locking various paths slowly reveal themselves is an amazing thing to behold as the game unfolds. I also just really love the online aspects of this game. I played this game when Dark Souls III was just about to come out and it gave it this kind of spooky feeling. Like I still got invaded a good bit and had help when I wanted it from others, but I could tell it wasn't as busy as it might have been during its initial hey-day. Like playing a weird culty Dreamcast game online in like 2005 (Phantasy Star Online anyone?). This spooky feeling of people being there but not at the same time fits the lore and the world itself really well and that aspect is probably even more exaggerated now (plus the fact that I fuck co-op proves im a n00b). But the fact people were still playing it at all, and still do to this day, speak to how singular and amazing it is. For me, this is just the end-all be-all as far as  archetypal high fantasy worlds go-- at least as far as the darker side of things go. Its a bit heavy metal and dreary for me as far as fantasy goes (I like my shit kinda twee and anime-core), but if I want dark and bleak, with an underlying sense of old-world scenic beauty, this game is unbeatable. Like literally, I can't beat it. That's my one complaint: too hard! I'm a noob, maybe one day I'll git gud and stop getting wrecked-- one can hope... 7. Persona 5

This is weird to put after Dark Souls 'cuz if I'm honest I feel like this game has so much more charm and character and like personality than Dark Souls? Idk, I guess I can make that claim. Like Dark Souls has tons of personality, but like Persona 5? I guess it has to do with my slight preference for action-RPG over turn-based, but this game almost seems like one long ass 100 hour+ trek through sheer charm and personality. Hm, PERSONA-lity? Wow genius. But really, this game is just dripping with unique style and charisma. And I'll be honest, I wen't in expecting a lot and for a solid like 20 hours initially I wasn't all that into it. I'm still kinda an SMT noob so I think I'm just impatient for how long this game takes to reveal itself. It's just freakin big and deep that it literally takes that long and then some to truly get going. But once it does... oh boy does it. I think it might be the coolest turn-based game I've ever played in terms of just the sheer combat itself (sorry all pre FFXI Final Fantasy games???). Equal parts FF at its deepest and classiest and Pokemon at its um. Well idk, it's not as Pokemon as Ni No Kuni, but the Persona-collecting system is freakin great. And the level of challenge the combat/dungeons have seem almost pitch-perfect in a way RPGs rarely do. And then add in all the social links/dating sim components, and the open world, and the weird Sly Cooper-inspired stealthy dungeon-crawling and you have like one of the craziest, coolest most legit JRPGs of all time.

But yeah the saving grace for me is the actual turn-based system/combat itself. For a turn-based, its bizarre how kinetic and speedy it can feel. You have all the time you need to strategize if you so chose, but once you know what your doing it can be like lightning, right up until the point where your arguing with a demon to either fork over some loot or join your party, or else your moving fluidly back into great dungeon-crawling action. And then yeah all the crazy super-Japanese high-school student simulation stuff rounds things out delightfully. Like, I admit I like my RPGs to either be high fantasy or else cyber-punky and this is neither of those. Like I'm not even sure what aesthetic so much of this is... smooth jazz and sassy r'n'b moodiness, and like Japanese high-school-attending outcasts who moonlight as stylish treasure-hunting demon-slaying thieves and fight against the inner-world manifestations of corrupt adults-- like what is that vibe? I really don’t know, but I suppose its something all true otakus understand on some inherent level, even if it does remain mysterious and ever allusive in its charms to me. 

But the story is cool and huge (Seriously, 100+ hours! What?!!?) and plumbs psychological depths and doesn’t pull punches when it comes to getting a little dark, if maybe in a somewhat simplistic way. But yeah, this game oozes charm, like in the way Mona is so undeniable as a side-kick. I mean they’re almost annoying too but then like, no, Mona’s pretty great though. There are things I can almost imagine it doing that would make me like it even more (like the whole day-cycle thing never quite feels as open as I want it to? But like if it was it'd be like 300 hours. Just that thing where you speed through yr day and almost skip right to one scene in-class and then BAM its after-school), but yeah like this nitpick doesn't even fully make sense. It's just that this game is open-ended af and yet it can also sometimes feel kind of like your spending a lot of time clicking through text without a ton of control. But really that's just the like first 20-30 hours. And again the combat is just undeniably solid. So yeah, it's lite-novel-y and when yr not in dungeons it can seem like yr clicking through an anime almost, but I mean that's kind of also what makes it amazing.

And I'll just touch lightly on presentation stuff like the amazing soundtrack and the f a b u l o u s  style of all the menu's and just over-all visual flair of this game, 'cause literally everyone notices that instantly. The dungeons also seem kinda weirdly PS2-looking to me, but like it doesn't matter. This game has a crazy amount of depth and charm that make more immaculate looking triple-A's seem soulless. Plus, yeah like all the menu stuff and like visual segues make it seem so much more stylish than them too even though its clearly not on the same level technically. So yeah, this game’s a lot of win. I was skeptical of the hype honestly, and aspects of Persona 4's world are a little cooler to me still, but man this game is just like... yeah it's good. It's soo long and so written and chock full of a very distinct kind of charm that it seems comparable to having some kind of weird virtual pal inside my ps4 (Does that sound sad ^.^;;). Like it's just cool to know I can always pop it in and hang out with my old pals Ryuji, Ann and Morgana. And Makoto.  For like 100 more hours now. How long is this? Where am I, I've been playing it for 3 days, help!? 8. Odin Sphere Leifthrasir-

I'll have less to say to this 'cuz I'm pretty new to the hype-train and thank god 'cuz I wrote way too much about P5? But yeah, this game is the addictively-awesome side-scrolling action-RPG/Beat-'em-up I didn't know I needed in my life. At first I thought the over-all look was kind of not really my thing, but I've done a full 180, and while its not the like more traditional anime/FF-esque style I'm used to, I've come to see just how beautiful and fresh its style is. And then the combat itself is sweeeeeeet. Endlessly playable and as deep as you'd want a still kinda light-feeling action-RPG to be. Plus there's a deep cooking system which just always takes good action-RPGs or any game over-the-top for me. Most of the game is done exploring these really fun combat-filled levels but some respite is found in the mini-farming and cooking mechanics. And the crafting adds an extra dimension as well. Soooo deep. I also love that it scores you on how stylishly your playing by tracking yr combos. This is one of the more fluid and engagings JRPGs I’ve played, and the hand-drawn look is to die for. So yeah, I'll keep it short and sweet, but the action is great, the characters' various play-styles are wonderfully varied, and the overall presentation is just so unique and cool. Oh and the story ends up being like really legit? Caught me by surprise. It's mostly just good old fashioned sprite-based fun, with a really sick Norse-inspired fantasy aesthetic. A video game's video game (what does that mean?? (you get it)).

9. Dark Cloud-

The true OG "Dark" action-RPG of my dreams and heart-- sorry Dark Souls, you were a decade late. This game encapsulate the joy of PS2-era action-RPGs, a high-point for the genre. The kind of vaguely bland-but-still-unique fantasy look of it (a successful "Ocarina-killer" for my money, on a visual level at least), the procedurally-generated dungeon crawling, and the freakin’ awesome city-building and NPC-interacting make this game pure win. Like yeah, its a bit clunky with its combat, but charmingly so for me. Its mostly just got this really nice sustained vibe of like sheer pleasantness all throughout, and I just can't get enough of its over-all vibe after all these years. Harder to put this one into words... but yeah the city-building and little tiny touches with all the NPC-helping and questing is what make it special for me. Especially the city-building (you get to restore these little towns that have been ravaged and you have to make everyone happy with the way you set things up. So Japanese and so fun..) Like what a cool, weird feature that ends up being great. Idk, its great. I like the vaguely arabian-ish vibe too. It's just...  really good. It's just sheer PS2-style win. So yeah this one is mostly a lot on inarticulate nostalgia but fuck it. 10. .Hack//Infection-

Speaking of inarticulate nostalgia...Now I can't quite say this game is like truly a "good" game? All the way through at least. In some ways its part of a big cash-grab for Bandai-Namco. I'll go with the first one in the series, but its really just a piece of a whole along with 3 other games, that may have been a bit padded and intentionally designed to leach a whopping 200 US from a true dreamer back in the day, who just couldn't help themselves. BUT it's also kind of amazing. Like the combat and dungeon-crawling is a bit cut-and-dry (is it just me or are procedurally generated PS2 dungeons kind of sick?) but its enough. You have tons of party members to choose from, a plethora of magic scrolls to use if you so choose, and your 2 trusty little twin blades with which you can press X to slash with until the cows come home. A game like Kingdom Hearts as an action-RPG seems so much more fluid and kinetic and yet? Well KH is ridic, and if I'm gonna die on some hill for a goofy anime-core action-RPG it'll be this one any day. It combines my favorite aesthetics (mysterious celtic-y high fantasy AND cyber-punk) by way of being a game-within-a-game, and by being about a fictional MMO while not actually being an MMO it's kind of meta AF also. Also, the stuff with the emailing the other party members you meet and the system that has you increasing your bond through these simulated conversations with other players just reeeally gets to me, and seems cooler than Persona confidant-developing honestly. I'm a huge sucker for the original anime, and you got these really sick OVA anime discs with each entry which were set in the real world that the game existed in and even though that shouldn't factor in really, I admit it does. It all comes together as this kind of cool, weird, slightly-trashy anime wet-dream from my childhood at the end of the day. Also, some sick music, sick AF character designs, and an overall concept (that I'll actually defend to the death despite some of the superficial anime plotting/characters) round things out very nicely. Just the fact that this is a game about an MMO... like what a concept (and a decade before that SAO garbage fire shit). Plus Grunty raising. And the G.U. Last Recode remaster is right around the corner, OMG!!!!!!

also rans/runner ups: 11. SSX 3

12. Resident Evil 4

13. Katamari Damacy

14. Super Mario Galaxy

15. No More Heroes

16. Spider-Man 2

17. Catherine

18. Bomberman '93

19. Tekken 4

20. Marvel Vs. Capcom 2

#top 10 #top 20 #video games #gaming #gamer #gamr #final fantasy #ffxv #zelda #botw #mgsv #dark souls #nier automata #yoko taro #super smash bros wii u #smash #persona 5 #persona #ssx 3 #.hack//infection #dot hack #dark cloud #resident evil 4 #katamari damacy #super mario galaxy #no more heroes #lumines #spider-man 2 #bomberman '93 #tekken 4

[banjodanger]

X-Men 3:The Last Stand(2006). This Is The Worst One, Right?

Wow.

Like, this was bad. I knew it was going to be bad, like over the years when I revisited this movie it got worse. It was never as good as it was seeing it in the theatre, I knew that. I told myself this. But I was not prepared for how much my opinion would change.

I’m going to tear this movie apart pretty hard, but I’m going to be mature and admit that there were parts of this movie I liked, and that I thought worked, because there were things I enjoyed. I’m examining movies and not just shitting on them.

First off, Beast really struck a nostalgia chord with me. I’m not saying Kelsey Grammar turns in an Oscar-worthy performance, but man it touched that little kid part of my brain that used to light up when I watched the nineties cartoon. If you told me they ripped his character off of old episodes of Cheers, I’d believe you. The speech patterns, his mannerisms, every time he was on screen I was enjoying it. Nicholas Hoult is a great actor and he really made the character his own, but this Beast is ripped straight from the comics and it was a delight.

You know, in a dumb way, I enjoyed Vinnie Jones too, but in a different way. I don’t think he was a good Juggernaut, but he’s a specific actor who plays a specific role and I don’t think he tries to stretch beyond that. So this is basically Bullet-Tooth Tony running around smashing shit up. If it sounds like I’m struggling to find things to compliment, well, I am. But I’m nothing if not a raging masochist so let’s try for one more.

This film is called The Last Stand, and I don’t think this film lives up to that title, even a little. However, it does a pretty fair job of changing the team. Xavier and Cyclops are dead, Magneto, Rogue, and Mystique are all depowered, so in chronological order it sure looks like, whatever happens in the next movie, it’s going to be a different team and a different villain.

I guess if this post has a theme, it’s that time makes fools of us all.

There’s a lot wrong with this movie. That Juggernaut meme line, the way this movie introduces characters just to forget about them(go ahead, tell me how this movie would be any different without Angel.), the lab on Alcatraz. The X-men defend people that tried to cure them and then...nothing? There’s never a teaching moment, unless you count Angel saving his dad which...no. That’s not a teaching moment, the film practically treats this cure as a good thing. They’re keeping a mutant child under lock and key, distilling his power through god knows what means, and somehow they’re not the villains of this film. We’re just supposed to assume they stopped processing it, because now Leech is smiling next to Kitty instead of locked in what’s arguably a kinda rad room. Where the fuck did they get him? Is he an employee’s kid? They’re cool turning their kid out into a lab rat? I guess it doesn’t matter if they want that employee-sponsored health insurance.

Quick side-note, capitalism is destroying us all.

But what’s taking me so long to get at is I was struggling with this blog post for a while. I know this movie hates women. I’m not holding myself up as a paragon of feminism, not even close. I have a lot to learn and unlearn. But I think it is painfully clear that this movie treats just about every woman in this flick poorly. Take a gander.

Rogue: Despite that very emotional speech from Wolverine, Rogue takes that cure for a boy. She leaves after watching Bobby skate with Kitty, and he’s the first person she sees after she’s cured.

Kitty: Jesus, this movie might as well put a red A on everything she wears. She openly flirts with Bobby in front of Rogue, she argues for mutants being above morality with Xavier. Kitty Pryde in this movie is never anything more than a romantic rival. Oh, and I guess she gets called a bitch by Juggernaut. So there’s that.

Mystique: Here is a character that believes in mutant supremacy one hundred percent, she might even believe it more than Magneto. Her own family hated her so much they tried to kill her. She is a mutant and that is a huge part of her identity. It’s why she’s followed Magneto for years. She even takes a bullet(dart?) for the guy, and he thanks her by tossing her aside like garbage. He leves her naked and alone on a hijacked prison convoy and at least ten dead cops. So she wants revenge, and you know what? That’s absolutely in character, Mystique is not one to turn the other cheek, of course she’d go over and help the X-Men, they preach working with humans and surely they’d have sympathy-oh, she decides to work with the people that locked her up? The ones that arguably hold heavy responsibility for her current predicament? Well, that’s a decision too.

So this all leads us to Jean Grey. The Phoenix. They’ve been building up this transformation since the first movie. This is a plot that has been building up for six years. And this movie almost completely disregards it.

After Jean destroys her childhood home, a weird decision that I think only appears in this movie as a callback to the comics, or maybe because someone didn’t have enough confidence in that opening scene. She basically disappears until the movie is done cramming the cure plot down our throats. She threatens Magneto with a cure gun and Wolverine pays her a visit while apparently traveling across the entire contiguous United States in thirty minutes. Which is weird, because if the Phoenix is all “Pain and rage” like Xavier, then the wholesale slaughter that occurs directly in front of her should be driving her nuts. Hundreds of people are killed or depowered in front of her and her reaction is like watching paint dry. Just for the record, her reaction to making out with Cyclops is to evaporate all the water in a lake and disintegrate a human being. Her reaction to the collective agony of hundreds of humans and mutants and ripping up a major landmark is to wonder what is taking McDonalds so long to make a Big Mac. Her meltdown is literally timed to happen directly after Magneto is out of the way and Leech is safe.

But while all that is bad, and shows some definite plot holes, unfamiliarity with the source material, and maybe a knowledge that this movie was going to hit number one at the box office if they just filmed Hugh Jackman reading Wolverine fanfiction. But after giving this movie some thought, I realized what was really bothering me about this movie as a whole, but Jean Grey in particular.

Ok, so the whole thing about these X-Men movies up to this point is that they’re grounded in reality. They don’t wear colorful costumes and they call each other by their real names. They don’t have superhero names, they have nicknames. And, unlike the X-Men of the comic books, they don’t go to outer space. So it makes sense that they’re not going to make the Phoenix an immortal space bird from beyond the stars. Phoenix doesn’t eat planets in this movie, and honestly that’s a good decision. After two movies that more or less take place in our reality, why would you introduce a bunch of fantastical elements all of a sudden(Asking you, Spider-Man 3)? The answer is, you don’t. You make the Phoenix another, higher manifestation of Jean’s powers. The next step in her evolutionary process.

But, by doing that, isn’t the Phoenix a mental illness?

Follow my logic, Jean is losing control of her powers. Her powers are mind-related. Jean Grey is losing her grip on her abilities and her grip on reality, and as a result is a danger to herself, her friends and family, and others. Jean needs help.

Or she needs a guy that has an unrequited crush on her to stab her in the abdomen.

That’s how this movie solves mental illness. Violence. No real attempt to help their friend, just Wolverine saying a line that wouldn’t be out of place in bad romantic poetry and then stabbing her. Because she asked him to. In the comics, she kills herself as a heroic sacrifice. In the movie, a man has to do it, because even though she might be the most powerful mutant on the planet, she’s still got two xx chromosomes and according to Brett Ratner that means she’s weak.

I could talk about all the ways this movie fails its characters but honestly I feel like I’ve typed enough. Fuck this movie. Bring on X-Men Origins because I refuse to believe it is any worse than this.

(For the record, if you or a friend is suffering from a mental illness, please get them help. Don’t call the cops, call a doctor or a trained mental health professional.)

#xmen xmenmovies x3 thelaststand moviecriticism mentalillness phoenix fuckbrettratner

[ciathyzareposts]

Rethinking the System (Again) and a Wrap-Up of Akalabeth

THE FINAL RATING SYSTEM, REDUX

I mentioned at the end of my last post that I was considering revamping my Final Ratings.  I’m not happy with a lot of the results that I’ve been getting, and the Innovation & Influence category seems to be the primary culprit.  I tested some ideas over the last few days, and mocked up some scores to see how the charts came out.  I’m fairly satisfied with what I’ve come up with.  (For an explanation of the old system, check the sidebar on the right.  It’s still going to be roughly the same.)

The Innovation & Influence category has always been a problematic one, in hindsight.  I put it in there to recognise games that are of particular historical importance, or that innovated a game feature. Both of those things are worth recognising, but neither of them are necessarily markers of whether a game is good or not.  I still think they should be a part of my rating system, but not a part that’s weighted as heavily as my other categories.

Another problem is that while I do have a decently broad knowledge of CRPGs and adventure games, not a lot of that knowledge comes first hand.  Most of the games I’ve played are from 1998 and before.  I think the most recent CRPG that I’ve played to completion is Might & Magic VI.  I couldn’t even hazard a guess as to what the most recent adventure game I’ve played is.  I don’t think I actually have the knowledge to rate games in this category accurately.  Perhaps I might if I pursue this blog for another decade, but right now?  Probably not.

So out goes Innovation & Influence (though not entirely, as you’ll see below).  What I’m replacing it with is Combat & Puzzles.  To me, these seem like the two primary activities of the respective genres I’m tackling.  Previously, they’d been folded into Mechanics and Challenge, but I think both are important enough to merit their own category.  For the most part, CRPGs will be rated on Combat, and adventure games on Puzzles, but there are going to be cases in which a game has plenty of both.  When that happens, I’ll make a judgement call on which of the two is more important to the game in question.

(I considered an Exploration category, because I do love games with interesting worlds to explore.  I don’t want to overhaul the system too drastically though, and I have to stick to seven categories if I want a score out of 100.  I’ll just have to settle for this being part of Story & Setting.)

The other thing I’m changing are the Bonus Points, which were an arbitrary addition so that my 7 categories with scores out of 7 could add up to 100.  Previously I’ve been awarding bonus points for games that I feel like I’ll revisit in the future, but it feels a bit like I’m just giving extra weight to the Fun category there.  If I like a game, I’m going to go back to it, you know?  Instead I’m using the bonus points for games that are innovative, influential, or that have some other quality that wasn’t covered in my other categories.  Replayability perhaps, or multiplayer functions that I couldn’t experience.  We’ll see.

The other change I’m making is that I will now allow scores out of 0, for games that are so heinous in a particular category that they have no merit at all.  I don’t think I’ve encountered one so far, but this opens up the possibility of scores below 14.

Obviously this means that I need to go back and re-jig the scores of the games I’ve already played.  I’ll do that over the next few days, and hopefully will be finished before my Sunday post.  Luckily, I only have 38 games to rate; if there had been many more I probably would have persisted with the old system.

Hopefully the new system will produce results that I’m happier with.  I realise that it’s still somewhat flawed: any rating system designed for both CRPGs and adventure games is bound to have some cracks in it.  I won’t be changing it again, though: if this one isn’t satisfactory, I’m just going to have to grin and bear it.  After all, I started this blog to play more games, not to jigger around with numbers.  With luck, this will be the last time I do something like this, and I can get on with making some progress on my list.

AKALABETH: FINAL RATING I was supposed to rate Akalabeth in my last post, but I held off until I’d decided whether I was changing things or not.  Consider this an example of the new system in action. Story & Setting: The story here is mostly non-existent, despite some extra detail from the manual.  Lord British tells you to kill some monsters, you go kill some monsters, the end.  At least it’s not a treasure hunt. As for the setting, I have to resist the urge to mark this up for being a precursor to Ultima.  Regardless of any future connections, this ain’t Britannia just yet.  That said, I have to take into consideration how expansive this game is: it’s the earliest game I’ve played that has both an overworld and an underworld.  (Moria doesn’t count, because it’s “overworld” was just another dungeon.)  The dungeons are the most immersive seen yet, mostly due to the large first-person view.  Unfortunately, these dungeons are all random, and there’s nothing to find in them except for monsters and chests.  I can’t quite bring myself to rate this a 3.  Rating: 2 out of 7.

Characters & Monsters: Lord British probably shouldn’t count here, as he’s nothing more than a quest-giver, with the personality of a generically good king.  The monsters are a decent selection, and two have special abilities that can make them something of a pain (the thief and the gremlin).  Mostly, though, they’re just lumps of hit points, and your tactics rarely change dependent on which you’re fighting.  All of that becomes moot once you’ve Lizard Manned up anyway.  Rating: 2 out of 7.

Aesthetics: By modern standards this is an ugly game, with wireframe dungeons and very crudely drawn monsters. That said, it’s the first 3D CRPG with any sort of immersion and there is a certain claustrophobic quality to the dungeons. Just the fact that you can see the monsters advancing down the corridors towards you must have been quite something in 1979, even though they can look a little ridiculous.  I’ve already mentioned the intro sequence in my last post, but it bears repeating here that it’s impressive for the time, and like no other CRPG before it.  The sound is sparse, merely the odd beep here and there, and not frequent enough to be truly irritating.  Despite some positives, though, it’s still too primitive to rate very highly.  Rating: 2 out of 7.

Combat: In essence, combat in Akalabeth boils down to pressing A for attack over and over again as your opponent strikes back at you, until one of you drops dead.  But because combat is integrated into the same system you use for exploration, there are plenty of other actions you can consider.  Perhaps you can turn around and flee?  Or use a Magic Amulet to cast a Kill spell or create a ladder to another level so that you can escape.  If the monster’s at a distance, you might want to pepper it with arrows or axes.  Positioning also matters, because monsters can attack you from the back and sides, or corner you in a dead end.  It’s still not terribly complex, but it has enough options to put it into the top tier for games of its vintage.  Rating: 2 out of 7. Mechanics:  On the surface, there are plenty of things to praise about Akalabeth.  It has a functional overworld, even if it is a little superfluous, and multiple dungeons that extend down further than any sane person could possibly explore.  The spells provided by the Magic Amulet are few but they’re all useful, providing options in combat and exploration.  Food is a little irritating and rudimentary, however, and when the game’s running at the regular speed of an Apple II the dungeon draws painfully slowly.  (I played it at normal speed for an hour before cranking it up on the emulator.)  And it all falls apart once you realise how the game’s randomisation works.  Overall, the flaws outweigh the good points.  Rating: 2 out of 7.

Challenge: If you ignore the Magic Amulet this game might score pretty well here, at least on the lower difficulty levels.  I have to factor in every element of the game though, and Akalabeth is utterly broken by the Magic Amulet and the easily gamed randomisation.  Once you’ve turned yourself into a Lizard Man multiple times, you’re in no danger at all.  Rating: 1 out of 7. Fun: Despite all its flaws, though, there is a certain charm that comes through, and I can enjoy a quick game of Akalabeth every now and then.  It doesn’t hold my attention for very long, but look: I can’t hate a game where you win by turning into a Lizard Man and wrecking house.  Garriot’s youthful enthusiasm shines through, and drags this up out of the basement.  Rating 2 out of 7.

Bonus Points: I am giving Akalabeth the full two bonus points. It’s a precursor to the premier CRPG series of the 1980s, it does loads of things that CRPGs hadn’t done before (especially in terms of visuals) and it has some replayability if you want to challenge yourself to a no-amulet run.

The first seven categories add up to 13, which doubled gives a total of 26.  Add the two bonus points, and Akalabeth gets a Final Rating of 28.  In the old system, that would put it 30th out of 39 games total.  In terms of CRPGs, that would put it equal 14th, with only Devil’s Dungeon underneath it.  However in the old system it probably would have got a 6 or 7 in Innovation & Influence, and jumped up into the middle somewhere.  No doubt once I’ve recalculated the chart it’ll jump up a decent amount.

(For some further reading on Akalabeth, check out this post at The Data Driven Gamer, where Ahab really delves into the code to find out what makes the game tick.)

NEXT: I’m on the cusp of completing Dog Star Adventure, so I might have a post for it up on Sunday. I do want to hold of on it until I’ve redone all of the Final Ratings though, so it might not appear until Wednesday.

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/rethinking-the-system-again-and-a-wrap-up-of-akalabeth/

#retro games #dos games #retro #crpg #adventure #amiga #oldcomputers #8bit #16bit #blog #repost

[recentanimenews]

Bookshelf Briefs 1/4/20

Dead Dead Demon’s Dededede Destruction, Vol. 7 | By Inio Asano | Viz Media – Every time a new volume of this fantastic series comes out I avoid reading it, possibly as I still expect it to end with everyone depressed or dead, because Asano. Despite that, things trundle along in this volume. Oran’s starting to have ominous feelings that she’s seen some of this before, and even the main cast heading to the beach, with lots of silly beach comedy, can’t quite stop you thinking things aren’t going to be the same anymore, especially after that cliffhanger. Makoto is on the cover, and gets a fair number of scenes as well, something you can’t always say about the covers. Most of all, this continues to examine the nature of conspiracies and media frenzies. Great stuff. – Sean Gaffney

My Hero Academia, Vol. 22 | By Kohei Horikoshi | Viz Media – What I remember about this volume’s chapters when they came out weekly was the fandom going ballistic attacking Momo after her loss. Possibly because the main cast praised her abilities regardless, possibly as she lost another fight and Jump fans are all secret wrestling fans complaining about “Jobbers.” It’s an excellent battle, though. The other fights are good as well. You’d expect Todoroki to clean up, but that battle too does not go as expected. Bakugo shows off that he can be kind and heroic while STILL being a loud asshole, and Izuku shows that the fact that he’s trying to learn his powers on the fly is leading to bad things. Fortunately, Uraraka and Shinso are there. Excellent. – Sean Gaffney

Queen Bee, Vol. 3 | By Shizuru Seino | Kodansha Comics (digital only) – In Queen Bee’s second volume, Toma realized he had feelings for Hirata while on a forest field trip, during which she displayed extreme competence (and fought off a bear). Now, they’ve become an official couple, but Hirata’s insecurity, coupled with the reveal of a junior high ex-girlfriend that Toma might still have feelings for, makes her worry that he’s just trying to make himself love her. Ordinarily, the emergence of a love rival in the latter half of the final volume of a short series would irritate me a great deal, but I actually liked that it gave Hirata one more opportunity to show that Toma’s happiness is her top priority. She may look scary, but she’s pure and valiant, and in the end, this series kind of gave me gender-flipped My Love Story!! feels. Truly delightful. – Michelle Smith

Queen’s Quality, Vol. 8 | By Kyousuke Motomi | Viz Media – Answers are here, with extended flashbacks showing us what actually happened years ago, and who Fumi is. It’s helpful to have Kyutaro’s late mother explaining things to them, admittedly, and she’s super cool—I’d be OK with more adventures of her. Meanwhile, as Fumi tries to take this all in, Kyutaro adds to things by confessing to her, something which is perhaps not timely but is at least heartfelt. That said, it may be relatively irrelevant, as the cliffhanger suggests that we may be seeing some memory loss/destruction of alternate selves going on. Still, as far as dream-laden fantasy shoujo with comedic undertones go, QQ is tops. And love that they still have Dengeki Daisy cameos in them. – Sean Gaffney

Saint Young Men, Vol. 1 | By Hikaru Nakamura | Kodansha Comics – The premise of Saint Young Men is both simple and kooky. Jesus and Buddha have rented an apartment in Japan to enjoy some well-earned time off, where they enjoy a sort of odd-couple existence, with Buddha being the serious guy who does all the chores and Jesus being the carefree guy who has a popular TV review blog. The situations are pretty fun—the guys go to an amusement park and ride a roller coaster, they experience a packed commuter train, Jesus buys a Shinsengumi costume to wear as pajamas, Buddha wins a statue of himself while trying to win a trip to Okinawa…—but I’m sad to report that I never actually laughed at anything. Perhaps that will change with later volumes, as I did think this one got more amusing as it went along. We shall see! – Michelle Smith

Species Domain, Vol. 7 | By Shunsuke Noro | Seven Seas – The bulk of this volume is based around the school athletics festival, which gives us a chance to revisit several ongoing issues: Kazamori trying to live up to the “elf” standard everyone sees in her, ship tease between Hanei and Mikasagi, and the usual athletic festival cliches. The most interesting part of the book was showing us that Mizuno, who is frustrated at the mermaid classmate who’s going to put the swimming competition out of reach, also is a mermaid. That said, the reason they’ve been hiding it is fascinating, getting into both monster cliches and the sort of thing that LGBTQ people deal with daily, and I thought the reaction of the class was great. All in all, another solid volume. – Sean Gaffney

Sword Art Online: Hollow Realization, Vol. 5 | By Tomo Hirokawa, based on the story by Reki Kawahara | Yen Press – Despite Genesis being a clear bad guy, one who’s even taking drugs to enhance his gaming “performance,” he’s still able to make a huge impression on Tia. Sadly, when he is then “killed,” that proves the impetus for her to pick up where he left off, and she’s now out to remove humans from this MMORPG. As always with SAO lately, there’s some good discussion of what constitutes an NPC, and Premiere also goes through some emotional crises, especially given Tia is her dark twin. The next volume is the final one, so we’ll see if Kirito and the cast of every other video game spinoff can help. Despite the high entry level of this series, it’s pretty decent. – Sean Gaffney

The Trial of Kitaro | By Shigeru Mizuki | Drawn & Quarterly – Collecting five short manga originally published in shonen magazines between 1968 and 1971, The Trial of Kitaro brings to a close Drawn & Quarterly’s delightful seven-volume compilation of selections from Mizuki’s influential series GeGeGe no Kitaro. Combining creepiness with comedy (including some literal potty humor—beware haunted mountainside toilets), the stories in this volume are tremendous fun. As with previous installments, the episodic chapters were in part chosen specifically to be kid-friendly, so there’s a certain amount of grossness and just plain strangeness to them. But, regardless of intended audience, I’m enamored with these yokai tales of horror. I love how Mizuki has taken traditional Japanese folklore and incorporated his own ideas and even some Western legends to create something truly special. Along with the other volumes, I will treasure The Trial of Kitaro. I am sad that this is the series’ end, but I am so incredibly happy that these stories were translated. – Ash Brown

By: Ash Brown

#Anime #News #Manga Bookshelf

[trendingnewsb]

5 YouTube Personalities Who Escaped From Scandal Unscathed

I’ve come to the conclusion that a big YouTube personality could hunt people on a private island, make a video about it called “Human Death Prank,” and that it would A) get several million views and B) would have no lasting consequences for the YouTuber.

We’ve fallen into a pattern wherein there’s a new scandal featuring one of these people every month, and it always ends the same way. The performer will lay low for a few weeks. YouTube might slap them on the wrist, maybe an advertiser drops. Then they’ll just start churning out the exact same content, having learned nothing and making just as much (in some cases more) money than before. Here, let’s revisit some recently scandalized social media celebs and see where they are now …

5

Logan Paul

You probably know Logan Paul as one of the many YouTube celebrities who looks like all of his hair is trying to escape from his head.

Logan Paul/YouTubeHis father is a Bloomin’ Onion and his mother a can of Red Bull.

You might also have heard of his most recent scandal, in which he posted a video of a suicide victim’s corpse in Japan’s Aokigahara forest. After a public uproar, he spoke to Michael Strahan on Good Morning America, saying, “I am a good guy who made a bad decision” — a claim that is 100 percent true if you remove the word “good” from it.

For you see, good guy Logan Paul has a storied past of doing things that are objectively dumb and also terrible. Like the time he pretend to be shot in the back of the head in front a crowd of screaming 10-12-year-old children. As soon as he returned to YouTube after the suicide forest video controversy, he immediately showed his respect for the sanctity of life by pulling a fish out of a pond and pretending to give it CPR and tasing some dead rats.

YouTube cited Paul’s “recent pattern of behavior” (corporate speak for “We’re secretly worried this person might be a budding serial killer”) when they decided to suspend ad revenue on his account, which has 16 million subscribers, many or most of whom are children. The suspension lasted for two whole weeks. It’s been reported that he actually gained around 80,000 subscribers after his recent controversies. And why not? He made international headlines. You can’t buy that kind of publicity!

And the next time he thinks his channel needs a boost, well, now he knows exactly how to do it.

4

Carter Reynolds

If you Google “Carter Reynolds,” the first result is a Business Insider article titled “The Rise And Fall Of Cater Reynolds.” Directly below that is the link for Reynolds’ Twitter account. He has 3.08 million followers. That … seems like a pretty cushy fall, but we’ll come back to that.

Reynolds got his start on Vine (remember that?), where at some point he is reported to have had four million followers — enough that he was able to get sponsorships from brands like Coca-Cola and travel the U.S. with “The Carter Tour.” He’s the kind of social media star who’s not particularly famous for anything more than being affable and good-looking in a non-threatening way that’s especially appealing to young girls. A few weeks ago, he tweeted “frozen yogurt sounds so good right now” …

Carters Reynolds/Twitter

… and it was retweeted 451 times. That’s pretty representative of his creative output.

Read Next

4 Mistakes We Shouldn't Let Movies And Shows Get Away With

In June of 2015, a video was leaked of Reynolds (19 at the time) and his ex-girlfriend, fellow social media star Maggie Lindemann (16 at the time). In it, Reynolds tries to pressure the visibly intoxicated Lindemann into giving him oral sex while he records it. Lindemann continuously repeats “I can’t” and “This makes me so uncomfortable” until he turns off the camera. Reynolds at first apologized in a single-line tweet, but then did a quick 360, saying on a YouNow stream that Lindemann owed him an apology for “things you guys don’t know about.” He added, “I didn’t rape her. She knows that herself … The fact that she’s trying to be all innocent now or something … it didn’t affect her that much. I know it didn’t.”

When Lindemann tweeted that she was in the hospital shortly after the video was released, Reynolds responded by tweeting, “Maggie is saying I’m the reason why she’s in the hospital … lol nah you’re just crazy and psychotic. Fuck you.” After receiving backlash, he then threatened to commit suicide on Twitter, apologized for it, and took a social media sabbatical.

The result? Well, in addition to his 3.08 million Twitter followers, today he has 3.2 million Instagram followers and 817,000 YouTube subscribers. While he’s no longer sponsored by Coca-Cola, he still does sponsored Instagram posts, including a recent one for Core water. He also sells merchandise and is getting ready to launch a clothing line with his new girlfriend, who is an Instagram model. Don’t follow his example, kids, or else that wretched fate may befall you too.

3

Sam Pepper

Sam Pepper is a former Big Brother UK contestant who managed to translate his brief reality TV fame into YouTube fame. He’s known for “pranking” people, which to be fair, isn’t some outrageous new trend. When I was in high school, guys were trying to punch each other in the dick and film it like Jackass, or screaming, “You just got Punk’d!” after knocking a friend’s book out of his hands.

The difference between Pepper and Ashton Kutcher is that Pepper’s audience is younger, and there’s no “Don’t try this at home kids” warning running in front of his content. His first controversy came in 2014, when he uploaded a video he called “fake hand ass pinch video,” which was just him pinching unsuspecting women’s asses with his real hand. After the backlash over the video, several women came forward with detailed accounts of sexual harassment and rape by Pepper. At least one rape accusation was investigated by the LAPD, but Pepper was never charged because the victim was not willing to testify after her father told her it would hurt her career.

Pepper continued his successful YouTube channel until 2015, when he staged another hilarious prank in which he convinced a young Vine star that his best friend was brutally murdered in front of him. After months of criticism about this incident, Pepper publicly confessed that his pranks were all faked, because if you did the things he pretended to do in public, you would be arrested. He then made his YouTube account private and deleted all of his tweets, going dark online for three whole months.

Today he still has 2.3 million YouTube subscribers despite infrequent posting (his latest video is called “HOW TO BUY ALCOHOL UNDERAGE * IT WORKED *”), plus he can boast another 1.3 million fans between Twitter and Instagram, plus some unknowable number of Snapchat followers. Oh, and he’s out there on the front line defending Logan Paul’s suicide forest video. Everyone is so triggered, you guys!

2

PewDiePie

PewDiePie is the Titan of YouTube. There’s really no comparable star in the old media world right now. You would have to make a human centipede out of George Clooney, Matt Damon, Brad Pitt, and Ryan Gosling to approximate the star power that PewDiePie has on YouTube. He currently has 61 million subscribers, ahead of his closest competitor by 23 million. Like a medically resistant staph infection, there just doesn’t seem to be anything that can stop him from growing.

In February of 2017, he paid two men on Fiverr (a “Pay strangers to do things for $5” site) to hold up a sign that said “Death to all Jews,” under the guise of this being the weirdest thing he could think to have somebody do for that amount of money.

PewDiePie/YouTube“Don’t forget to ‘Like’ and ‘Genocide’!”

Thanks to an article in The Wall Street Journal, the outrage went mainstream and a whole generation of old people had to figure out how to say “PewDiePie.”

The incident caused Disney’s Maker Studios to cut ties with him, as well as YouTube to drop him from their Google Preferred ad program. PewDiePie responded with a video saying his actions were a joke, which kind of isn’t the point. (Meanwhile, neo-Nazi website The Daily Stormer featured a blog post congratulating him for “making the masses comfortable with our ideas.”)

But hey, anybody can screw up once. Seven months after this apology, however, PewDiePie loudly and clearly yelled the N-word while streaming an online game, noting later that he’d forgotten he was streaming to the public (you know, it’s the kind of thing he normally only says among friends). This time he said, “I’m not going to make any excuses for why I did it, because there are no excuses for it.” He went on to say he was disappointed in himself.

By now, you know how the story ends. The kind of thing that would have permanently sank the career of, say, a Seinfeld co-star is but a scratch on the hull of PewDiePie’s Star Destroyer. According to Forbes, he made 20 percent less than his 2016 earnings … which means he netted $12 million. Meanwhile, he gained about two million subscribers after the controversies, seemingly without losing any.

1

JonTron

Since this is 2018 and we find ourselves involuntarily grading racism on a curve, it’s easy to argue that PewDiePie isn’t as bad as the swarm of unapologetic racists that fill YouTube. He repeatedly says he doesn’t believe those things, that it’s all just shock value humor, that he’s learned his lesson, etc. That is not the case for JonTron, who was extremely eager to tell the world that those are in fact his views.

JonTron has 3.9 million subscribers on his YouTube channel, and turns up on a couple of others. He’s actually pretty funny — his whole persona is the cuddly nerd next door. Which is why it was so shocking to his fans when he took to Twitter to defend Republican Senator Steve King’s comment that “We can’t restore our civilization with somebody else’s babies.”

JonTron/Twitter

When people called him out for it, he decided to clarify his views on the subject by discussing them with Steve Bonnell, a Twitch streamer knows as Destiny. Over the course of an excruciating two hours, JonTron clarified in great detail that he thinks racial purity is extremely important to the future of America, and that he fears the day whites become a minority (which he estimated would happen in 2042).

In response to angry fans, he said, “The fact that people think it’s troubling is what’s troubling.” In the course of the debate, he also claimed that wealthy black Americans commit more crimes than poor white Americans, that Mexicans are somehow attempting to recapture American land, and that “We don’t need immigrants from incompatible places.” Gee, I wonder which places he considers incompatible?

He then issued an apology for his clarification, saying, “I do completely understand that historically the African American community has had a raw deal in this country. Discrimination certainly exists but I do believe it goes all ways.” And later, “Any of the things in the stream that could be considered weird sounding or off-putting, I probably agree with you that they were. So, I hope you don’t read too much into it.”

OK? He seemed to swing wildly between “I’m a comedian, I don’t want to talk about politics” and “But here are my terrible politics, and if you don’t like them, you’re policing my thoughts” before finally landing on “Don’t listen to the things that I say.” At this point, do we even need to point out not only that JonTron still has his millions of subscribers, but also that his videos are still sponsored? The only lasting effect seems to be the entry about the controversy on his Wikipedia page.

The promise of the internet was always that there’d be no gatekeepers. You can publish directly to the world, bypassing editors, publishers, censors, TV networks, etc. Well, here it is. There is nothing between these guys and their audience, and what we’ve found is that their audience is not scared away by sexism, racism, or anything else.

The rest of us will have our weeks of outrage, and we’ll see vague headlines about boycotts and suspensions. While we’re patting ourselves on the back, these guys know they just need to hunker down for a bit and weather it. They know the audience isn’t going anywhere, and as long as the eyeballs are there, the money will follow. No matter what.

Ever notice how normal photographers are never embroiled in scandals? Stick to still-life with a Nikon DSLR camera.

Support Cracked’s journalism with a visit to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you.

For more, check out 5 Crappy Sides Of YouTube Stardom No One Talks About and The Fate Of 4 Internet ‘Celebrities’ After Viral Fame.

Also, follow us on Facebook, if you like jokes and stuff.

Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-youtube-personalities-who-escaped-from-scandal-unscathed/

from Viral News HQ https://ift.tt/2HA3hS6 via Viral News HQ

#IFTTT #Viral News HQ

[char27martin]

Three Keys to Selling a Children’s Picture Book Biography

I love picture book biographies. I love reading them and being inspired and thinking, “Wow, that’s an amazing story. How come I didn’t know that?” And I love writing them. Why? Because picture book biographies are all about inspiring kids to their own greatness. This is important to me.

In addition to being full of inspiration, picture book biographies continue to be one of the hotter areas in children’s publishing. The educational push of Common Core standards towards teaching and exploring nonfiction has created a market need that continues to grow. This need makes picture book biographies a smart choice for writers looking to break into children’s writing.

Here are three key questions that will help you get your story off on the right foot.

Do you write picture books? Picture book author (and author of this post!) Michael Mahin is giving away a free manuscript critique of a picture book of 1,500 words or less. Interested in entering? Follow @MahinWriter on Twitter, then tweet @MahinWriter and @crisfreese (in the same tweet!) with the title of your picture book, and the hashtag #WDMahinPB. We’ll choose a random winner. The winner will be chosen on Friday, November 17.

1. Do you have a great hook?

A great hook has a “wow-factor” that sells itself. In the case of picture book biographies, a great hook is first and foremost a great subject.

Subjects for these books generally fall into one of two categories: 1. People who are recognizable public figures, but whose stories we may not fully know. 2. People who made some exceptional contribution to the world, but who have been forgotten by history.

My book Muddy: The Story of Blues Legend Muddy Waters, illustrated by Evan Turk, falls into the first category—Muddy Waters is a recognizable name, though most of us don’t know the story of how he overcame extreme poverty and racism to find his musical voice and become the godfather of rock n’ roll.

On the other hand, the book, Grace Hopper: Queen of Computer Code, written by Laurie Wallmark and illustrated by Katy Wu, falls into the second (for most people). In this book, we learn about a woman whose genius and whose name we may not know, but whose accomplishments are instantly impressive. Ever heard the term “computer bug”? Yeah, well Grace Hopper coined it. Your choice of subject should be equally impressive.

One thing to consider is that many of these “forgotten figures” are women and/or people of color whose stories have been marginalized by a culture that has historically favored a white, male point-of-view. The #WeNeedDiverseBooks folks have done a great job of articulating the need for stories about diverse subjects and by diverse authors. Since the publishing business continues to make a concerted effort to address this, you might consider this when looking for your subjects.

If you do not identify with a minority culture, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t write about it. It just means that you need to be diligent in your research and extra sensitive to your subject matter. Sensitivity readers are a good way to make sure you are being culturally aware.

Another great type of hook is one that puts a new spin on a tried and true topic, like Kathleen Krull and Paul Brewer’s Lincoln Tells a Joke: How Laughter Saved the President (and the Country), and What To Do About Alice?: How Alice Roosevelt Broke the Rules, Charmed the World, and Drove Her Father Teddy Crazy! by Barbara Kerley. Both take the very famous and well-trod personages of Abraham Lincoln and Teddy Roosevelt, and find a new and fun way into their lives. In these cases, the “new-spin-on-the-old” creates an irresistible hook into subjects we thought we knew.

All of these examples have great hooks because their subject, their subject’s accomplishments, and/or their new-spin-on-the-old, give them a “wow-factor” that make them instantly compelling. Your subject must do the same thing. If it doesn’t, find one that does. A poorly chosen subject will kill your book dead in the water.

Grab the latest edition of Children’s Writer’s & Illustrator’s Market online at a discount!

2. Do you have a great climax?

The trick to structuring a picture book biography, and all nonfiction for that matter, is being true to historical events while making sure the story stakes escalate in a way that builds to some sort of satisfying climax. Identifying a compelling climax is crucial because it helps you identify what your story is about and how to structure it.

With this in mind, as I start researching, I am always on the lookout for the big moment that will serve as the story’s finale. This moment doesn’t necessarily have to come at the end of my subject’s life, but it does have to represent a significant achievement and turning point in their life’s journey.

For Muddy, I built the book around his first, big hit song. For my book on Carlos Santana, When Angels Sing: The Story of Music Legend Carlos Santana (forthcoming in 2018), I chose to climax with his career-making performance at Woodstock. From a storytelling perspective, I chose these moments because they represented clear and significant turning points that set the stage for the people that they would become later in life.

Climaxing with these moments also helped me overcome a common pitfall of picture book biographies—what to include. It is very hard to compress a person’s life into 1,300 words, and most agents and editors would prefer your picture book biography be even shorter. By choosing a climactic moment from early in a subject’s life, I’m able to limit the material I need to cover. Granted, this won’t work for every story, but it’s something worth considering.

After identifying my climax, my job then becomes to turn this climactic event into a moment of high-drama. To do this, I ask, “What are the internal and external obstacles that stand in the way of that climactic accomplishment?” The unique way that your subject actively overcomes those obstacles is, of course, what makes them special.

3. Do you have an awesome author’s note?

For writers of picture book biographies, it’s important to remember that your first goal on the way to a sale is not getting kids excited about your story, but rather convincing your agent or editor that you have a story worth telling. For me, the author’s note is one last chance to convince an agent or editor that I do.

Your author’s note shouldn’t be a book length exploration of everything you had to leave out, but it should be long enough to clarify why the person you’ve written about is historically significant. Since historical significance is only something that can be explored with perspective and distance, it is very hard to convey this directly in the flow of a present tense narrative. This is why you need an author’s note, and it’s especially important for subjects who are not household names—this is where you convince your reader that even though they don’t know the story, they should.

On a basic level, you want to explain what your subject accomplished in their life, and why that is important to us today. If you’ve done it right, your reader should be looking forward to the author’s note the same way you look forward to the historical photos and notes that follow many “Based on True Story” movies. A good story will make readers want to know more.

Writing your author’s note is also a chance to make sure that you’ve told the right story. If your author’s note is more compelling than the story you’ve actually written, it’s time to revisit what you’ve focused on. Don’t forget that while the author’s note tells the reader why someone is important, your story should be showing them.

In my forthcoming Stalebread Charlie and the Razzy Dazzy Spasm Band (2018), illustrated by Don Tate, this is where I tell the readers that the homeless, 15-year-old Stalebread Charlie’s real name was Emile Lacoume, and that “spasm” bands like his are now considered an important part of the evolution of Jazz music. It’s a pretty cool detail, and one that states precisely why my subject is unique and important.

If you’ve chosen a good subject, this note should be full of “wow-factor” accomplishments that make your reader say, “This is a story that has to be told.”

While following these suggestions is obviously no guarantee of success, I can tell you from experience that they’ll at least get your story off on the right foot. That’s a great thing, because, now, all you have to do is write it! And that, of course, is the fun part.

                    Michael Mahin is a children’s author, aspiring screenwriter, and self-confessed wannabe rockstar. His debut picture book, Muddy: The Story of Blues Legend Muddy Waters (Atheneum), is a Jr. Library Guild Selection; a Gold Medal, Eureka! Nonfiction Children’s Picture Book Award Winner from the California Reading Association; and has been named a New York Times Best Illustrated Book of 2017. Michael admires people like Muddy Waters who, despite great suffering, find the courage to be themselves in a world that wants them to be something else. Michael hopes his books inspire kids to do the same. He blogs about the craft of writing and dreaming big at www.MichaelMahin.com and can be found on Twitter at @MahinWriter.

If you’re an agent looking to update your information or an author interested in contributing to the GLA blog or the next edition of the book, contact Writer’s Digest Books Managing Editor Cris Freese at [email protected].

The post Three Keys to Selling a Children’s Picture Book Biography appeared first on WritersDigest.com.

from Writing Editor Blogs – WritersDigest.com http://www.writersdigest.com/editor-blogs/guide-to-literary-agents/guest-columns/selling-childrens-picture-book-biography