#but like....very little

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[eastgaysian]

#ordinary photo of yeti #they made astarion in a lab for me to be obsessed with. #like hottest man in game for me is halsin truthfully. astarion is my shitty little white dog with separation anxiety who bites people. #very different things. if i say i'm doing a playthrough as astarion that's when you put me down #main factor motivating me not to is i need to hear neil newbon's voice acting at least once a minute or i die. #i've got a dark urge concept rattling around the brain but i should maybe self-impose a gaming break and take care of. responsibilities 😐

[ardri-na-bpiteog]

Also increasingly aware that a LOT of people "manage" getting through the 40+ hour work week by sleeping less than is healthy and relying on stimulants like coffee and energy drinks to keep them going.

For people who are unwilling or unable to do this...work really does just dominate your life. Like we really should not have to rely on unhealthy practices just to have a social life or keep on top of housework or whatever.

I know I post about this a lot but I'm so TIRED all the time and it's just so depressing that this is how we're expected to spend the one life we have.

#i have to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night to even barely function #with sleep #getting ready for work #commute #cooking #and errands #I typically have maybe 2-3 hours to actually do what i want in a day #and I'm usually too tired to actually do the things i want to do #and that's with a very short commute #if i actually had a long commute I'd basically do nothing but work #i see my friends like once every few weeks or months #because we're all so fucking busy with work and have such little time for socialising #and none of us even have kids or anything!!

[ink-the-artist]

Love the contrast between the Americans’ “Apollo” and the Soviets’ “Sputnik.” You got the Americans naming their rocket after a Greek god trying to communicate the grandness and importance of this rocket. And you got the Soviets naming their rocket “fellow traveler.” Like a friend you go on an  adventure with together. This rocket is our little friend lol 

#i think its cute #they took the mars rover approach #humanizing the space craft making it cute making us (me) project emotions onto it #the soviets also used imagery of laika in propaganda a lot #which is pretty fucked up imo #but if i grew up in the soviet union that shit wouldve definetly worked on me lmao #the narrative of a heroic little dog going to space and being honored by the whole country #as cruely wrong as it is its very appealing #the soviets knew what they were doing man they didnt reveal how laika really died until like. the 2000s #bc they knew people really cared about that dog #they liked the narrative around her

[bereft-of-frogs]

There’s that post that’s like ‘everyone should get into a tiny niche fandom at least once’ fully agree, that was really fun -- but I would like to add that everyone should get into a fandom where their opinions run counter to major fanon because it really teaches you about sticking to your guns and trusting your interpretation of the text without having to rely on peer validation

because WHAT are people talking about sometimes

#aka: genuinely sometimes I think I live in a parallel universe and simply watched/read different things #full disclosure it does make you feel like a killjoy sometimes #because often times these fanons will be presented in a silly jokey manner #'oh so silly isn't this character so funny this is just my silly little headcanon' #and it's like yes yes lol lol but ok look me in the eyes and tell me you know that this is #at best only one interpretation of many and at worst simply not supported by the text at all #please tell me you know that #or in one specific example such a ubiquitous joke that is literally a significant theme of the work and i feel like SUCH a killjoy #being like 'ok yes very funny.....you know that was a major theme right?? tell me you know that'

[catmask]

does anyone have like an anti aesthetic. like something you look at and can recognize as a complete fashion/interior design/artistic movement and understand it but it makes you shudder seeing it. i am not talking like “its morally bad” “its poorly structured” like just sheerly devoid of joy for you actually invites a repulse response.

#also if it wasnt clear this isnt ‘its bad its lazy’ there is a level of like #completion consistancy i am thinking for with this #personally i really do not enjoy the like. vintage chic long red nails fur coats noir esque aesthetic HOWEVER 💥💥💥 #i can recognize that it is put together it is Intentional #i feel like a lot of people are going to say minimalism on this so LET ME SAY 🫰☝️ i recognize that minimalism is Considered an aesthetic #but i *PERSONALLY* do not consider it an aesthetic i consider it the void of one #it is a lapse in aesthetic or personality in the same way a silence in a song is still technically a ‘beat’ but no music is played #however the importance of Space or Breath in design is more akin to a purposeful silence in music #because that silence matters in the same way rhythm and breath in design do #so i guess minimalism is more comparable to like. white noise. the sound of a fan #very little effort and there is a comfort in it i suppose but its not. A Design. okay #TO ME 🤫 #if minimalism has one hater its me if minimalism has no haters im dead

[allagashed]

whenever i say “screaming crying throwing up” this is what i mean

#american psycho #patrick bateman #christian bale #rewatched last night he’s soo stupidly pathetic why is he the way he is #allagashed obsessed with another insane man (fork found in kitchen) #sorry 2 my very little followers my interests bounce around so quick i only have like two i’m constantly into and its nirvana and ed movies #+ horror movies so actually three nvm

[joycrispy]

Zepotha will never be Goncharov because when it comes down to it, tumblr culture is collaborative, while tiktok culture is merely iterative, and those are not the same thing.

#also because tumblr has a very specific way that it interacts with the media it loves #like make no mistake; when we made Goncharov we were a little bit making fun of ourselves #and the way we project high emotion and significance onto even the smallest details #(also the way we want everything to be gay) #tiktok isn’t doing that. they think the joke is the fake movie itself. but the fake movie isn't really the point. #the point is the fake FANDOM #goncharov

[inkskinned]

you're in the habit of denying yourself things.

if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.

but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?

what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.

and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.

you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.

so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.

it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.

sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.

oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.

#warm up #this isn't good #writeblr #this is complicated by the fact i can't stand up too long or i fuckken pass out and <3 hit my damn head <3 #but i did take a deep breath and buy myself the stupid rice cooker #and!!! a very cheap sushi kit!!! i have been wanting to try making sushi for literally YEARS #the kit was only like 15 dollars!!!! and i haven't purchased it bc?!!??!?!?!?!!? #..... i didn't get the mixer tho that felt. like a lot. like too much. #on my list is a kitchenaid. one day when i get a check and i have paid off my student debt #and medical debt #i will put that first little bit of cash #into a kitchenaid 5qt stand mixer (with attachments) #i really do just go into their refurbished section and stare lustily at each option #but yeah i feel guilty about the rice cooker even tho i know for a fact this damn thing is gonna be a lifesaver #oh shit also fuck i forgot to mention . poached eggs

[twilight-zoned-out]

Learning about the Doctor Who specials' expanded budget: oh no, what if they overuse CGI to look more 'professional' and high-budget?

The first scene of the Doctor Who Special:

#:D #[ID: The Fourteenth Doctor looking tired in front of a green screen of space \End ID] #it's still just as cheesy and silly as it was during 10's run #doctor who #fourteenth doctor #the image looks like something a fan would make tbh #the only very jarring part of the budget was how nice quality the camera was throughout the episode #I kind of wish it was a little less crisp because it made everything look a bit off in a way #but I also haven't watched 13's run so maybe it's not as stark of a jump as it felt for me #10 especially always felt very fuzzy and warm in terms of camera quality #tenth doctor #the star beast #twilight-zoned-out #doctor who spoilers #dw #dw spoilers

[blueboyluca]

“When I first heard it, from a dog trainer who knew her behavioral science, it was a stunning moment. I remember where I was standing, what block of Brooklyn’s streets. It was like holding a piece of polished obsidian in the hand, feeling its weight and irreducibility. And its fathomless blackness. Punishment is reinforcing to the punisher. Of course. It fit the science, and it also fit the hidden memories stored in a deeply buried, rusty lockbox inside me. The people who walked down the street arbitrarily compressing their dogs’ tracheas, to which the poor beasts could only submit in uncomprehending misery; the parents who slapped their crying toddlers for the crime of being tired or hungry: These were not aberrantly malevolent villains. They were not doing what they did because they thought it was right, or even because it worked very well. They were simply caught in the same feedback loop in which all behavior is made. Their spasms of delivering small torments relieved their frustration and gave the impression of momentum toward a solution. Most potently, it immediately stopped the behavior. No matter that the effect probably won’t last: the reinforcer—the silence or the cessation of the annoyance—was exquisitely timed. Now. Boy does that feel good.”

— Melissa Holbrook Pierson, The Secret History of Kindness (2015)

#dog books #this chapter was very sad reading #when you become aware of punishment #and its use and its prevalence #it's hard not to despair #again this is why positive reinforcement feels like absolution #maybe now my eyes are open I can make up for what I did #what I did because it's what everyone does #because it's more acceptable to punish than to do anything else #I've been having so many thoughts about punishment and society and justice #this book was very validating #another great validating moment in my jumbled thoughts #was listening to the You're Wrong About episode on justice #with Amanda Knox #it helped to ease the despair a little

[nerdpoe]

Danny puts up with a lot of stress, okay. His coping mechanism is....okay, it's a little weird, he's not gonna lie.

It is widely known that he has a human form and a ghost form; it is not widely known that his ghost form can do pretty much whatever he wants it to.

This includes making it smaller. Changing the ghost tail to a fish one. Making the suit be scales instead of a suit.

He does it so many times he now officially has three forms, and one of them is purely for himself and no one else.

His stress relief is to go to the aquarium, switch to the tiny merman form, and hide in the rocks of his favorite exhibit; the shark exhibit.

He stays in the back, away from the people visiting it's sight, and just vibes. He's even made a small cave the sharks can't fit into a tiny little nest.

No one would expect him there. No one would be looking for him there. He was free to just...take a moment.

Well, so he thought.

Because the humans visiting did see him. Multiple times.

They took pictures.

Now the Amity Park Aquarium is in some deep shit with Atlantis, because there's documented proof that they're keeping a literal baby mer in there as a spectacle.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #mermay #he is very small little mer-person #the mer equivalent of a borrower #unfortunately he's the size of a baby mer #because they hatch small and grow fast #arthur is pissed #like #PISSED #goes there to find the kid only to think they've hid them

[pickled-flowers]

Sex positivity is also about not calling Ace people prude and using virgin as an insult 👍 hope that helps

#sex positivity is also respecting sex lives that dont look like yours #or lack thereof #and insulting people by saying they dont fuck make you sound stupid <3 #im sorry i just cant take people who use their sex lives as a flex seriously its just not my thing! #like yea having lots of kinky sex is cool but not having sex and not being interested by sex is also cool #one is not better than the other the human experience is just very varied and diverse #its normal you wont understand everyone your brain isnt even made to comprehend how many human there are in the world #but we should all have spaces to navigate our sex lives as we wish even if that means interacting with sex as a subject as little as possibl

[lazylittledragon]

you know what fuck it we’re doing dadstarion

#bg3 #baldur’s gate 3 #astarion #tavstarion #idk if this is canon to the dorianverse yet but he looks like a little hobbit!!! #this is a Long long long time post brain i think. since they’ve sorted out the daywalker thing #i don’t think he’d be affectionate but i think he’d be VERY protective #they’re not bad parents in the way that they neglect or mistreat him or even just don’t love him #i think they love him to death but you just shouldn’t give your small child a KNIFE #this one is my favourite sister bc she reminds me of robin

[egophiliac]

finally got some time to finish these guys up! which is sort of ironic considering I started these because I wanted to draw Malleus with a Dragapult, and then I just didn't for a million years!

Malleus has the aforementioned Dragapult, except it's a super special non-canon color Dragapult (like an anime-only form that you could get in-game exclusively through some limited-time event where you have to show up in-person at a specific location in Japan) (it has some wacky overpowered exclusive move/form and the OT is listed as Malleus) (so like that kind of ridiculous specialness) (Leona is extremely salty about this). also hoards and hoards of Dreepy. Dreepy LOVE Malleus. they take naps on his horns inbetween begging him to throw them across the island at mach speeds.

Lilia has a Drampa and a bunch of Woobat that he hasn't actually caught, they just follow him around in swarms because they sense a kinship with him. (also breaking my own rule again to say that he had a Mawile in the past, because...I just really wanted to give him a Mawile...)

Sebek has Sandile for obvious reasons, and also a Pikachu that bullies him relentlessly. :(

Silver has a shiny Corvisquire; I really went back-and-forth on also giving him an Aegislash, but...hm. those pokedex entries though. he can stick with just one for now.

(I hadn't planned on the shiny for him, but after I'd decided on the Corvisquire line and was looking it up for reference, I realized that shiny Rookidee is gold and then turns silver when it evolves and I lost my entire goddamn mind)

#art #twisted wonderland #pokemon #poketwst #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 5 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 part 5 spoilers #i literally did not realize until drawing this that lilia and mawile have same-hairsies #obviously i was correct to choose it #anyway i did briefly consider giving malleus a legendary because if anyone was going to have one it would be him #because he is the specialist little boy #but i just feel VERY strongly about him being covered in dreepy. this is absolutely necessary. #and honestly you know what #i think it's funnier if he himself is actually a (shiny) rayquaza #not in disguise or anything it's not a secret #he's just casually chilling in human form in a high school and everyone's like 'oh yeah that's rayquaza i have math class with him' #'i had to show him how to use the calculator app' #shoot i should've drawn him with rayquaza horns instead. dangit.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so how about that update, huh

#this is all i have to offer rn </3 #im working on Actual Art but for now all you guys get is Half Assed Meme #eddie dear. eddie. eddie dear. Eddie Dear. EDDIE DEAR- #oh man. oh boy. oh fuck. its so over (we're so back) #scribble salad #welcome home #welcome home puppet show #eddie dear #i feel like i just walked into a disaster recovery group a week late w/ a smoothie #heely-ing in here Whats Up Fuckers #ok that was a creepy glitch #for a second every button i pressed created a new tag that said #'Who Else Is Traumatized!!!' #a little unnerving and Very on brand! one could call it WHcore... or somethn...