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#but i consider them to play a important role in my life and i appreciated the radish and wish i got the readings done

csuitebitches · 4 months

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I apologize for the long ask and if this question is a bit juvenile but objectively, how can one “gain” pretty privilege/gauge how they are viewed? I’ve done well in career pursuits for how early on I am ( I graduated in 2020) but started noticing that the invites to events/opportunities where one can really establish themselves not only professionally but socially, I was getting passed over by some higher up colleagues. In speaking to a female mentor who is related to my field and the same background as me (Black), she alluded that while my race may play a small factor in it, it’s more so my appearance that may be holding me back as the personality and poise is there. Some coworkers of mine who are brilliant and POC have similar credentials and positions as I and while we are all wonderful and hard working, they (who I feel are more beautiful and put together looks-wise) have discussed privately to me they have noticed a difference in treatment between us. While it’s not right, I am adult enough to know not to let things that can be fixed hinder the life I want. Your page is a wealth of information and I appreciate how encouraging you are!!

well. I’m going to be very blunt.

it’s all fun and games to say “oh fuck the beauty standards they’re terrible and they shouldn’t exist” yes, true, unfortunately they do exist and they play a bigger role than we imagine it to be.

the first thing you have to get right is your mindset.

you need to be strong enough to admit that you need changes in X, Y, Z area but not in A, B, C area. You also need to be a little loyal towards your racial identity (for the better or worse) because that’s what is going to make you stand out.

if you have a sensitive, overly emotional mindset and you get hurt very easily / become obsessive by nature, I highly recommend you to STOP reading now.

Understand what is considered pretty in your country and area. Even in one country, beauty standards can different from the north and south. Don’t exactly try to become attractive for the opposite sex but understand what they find attractive because these guys are your primary responders to your pretty privilege. Women will be kind on the surface and so it can be difficult to get constructive criticism from them.

Understand what YOU consider pretty. Who are the women who you think are crazy beautiful? What do they look like, dress like, how’s their hair and their make up, can you replicate any of it? Rule of thumb when it comes to hair and beauty - look at influencers / celebs who are of your racial background for the best fit.

there are always a few things that are universally considered “respectfully attractive” not “you wanna fuck me attractive”- semi modesty/ modesty outfits (my father always told me that when in doubt, go for a more conservative look), hygiene, well kept hair, clean nails and toe nails, soft skin, natural make up, natural hair colour, perfume, clothes that fit, skin care, a workout routine.

pretty privilege is not just the art of looking pretty. It’s also bringing in something of value on the table. Value = money / connections / knowledge/ humour / being the fun social person / whatever value the target group considers to be the most important for you to be relevant to them. Work on your soft skills. It’s better to look half baked but have solid soft skills than to look amazing and not know how to converse.

things that one normally notices when meeting someone new:

Skin - is it clear, is the make up overdone?

hair - is it messy or does it suit your face structure?

how you smell

teeth, when you talk - and dental hygiene

shoes - are they filthy?

shirt/ top - does it fit you well (always check that the seams on your shoulder and your actual shoulder line up), the colour of your clothes

body type, posture, how you carry yourself

start with incremental changes. Make a list of things you think you could improve on (this is not a list of “ugly” things, it’s an “improvement/ potential” list). Sort them according to ease of improvement (is this going to be expensive and difficult or affordable and easy?) and time (can this be done overnight or will it take some time).

Use point 1 and 2 only as launching pads. You do not have to look like Beyoncé, you’re simply understanding what her MUA and hair stylist does for her that could work for you. After a point, you have to ensure that YOUR identify sticks out and is still there, you’re not born to imitate someone else and also, it’s very obvious when someone is trying to be someone they’re not.

again. I repeat. If you’re going to get obsessive and make yourself sick over this it’s NOT WORTH IT. If you’re not mentally capable of making these changes, do not go through it.

#Q/a #pretty privilege

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brujahinaskirt · 1 year

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One thing I really appreciate about Rockstar's passive characterization of Arthur, and something I think fandom occasionally fails to pick up on, is that...

[characterization meta under the cut, including rdr2 spoilers]

... Arthur is definitely a masculine style of reserved in that he struggles to verbally express his feelings for/to human adults. (Even high-honor Arthur has a hard time at this, which is interesting and quite sad, considering how easily easily he verbally expresses his love to Jack and animals, or when he's had too much to drink.) But despite this, he's not PHYSICALLY reserved in expressing his affection and connectivity to other people, and this is a really important facet of understanding who he really is and wants to be.

Like most horse people I know (including myself before I deliberately expunged it from my behavior after moving to a city), Arthur's very tactile. He uses his body to offer reassurance and ground other people in the way we often do with horses. Throughout the game, he's often giving out such physical gestures of camaraderie and care, sometimes even to people he doesn't know very well. Hugs, back claps, wrapping his arm around people, gripping shoulders, steering people around, tapping people offhandedly to calm them down/still them.

Of course he does this to people he loves, like cradling Tilly to him to reassure her she's safe after a crisis or holding Jamie to comfort him after his breakdown. But he also does it for new friends (often patting, grounding, or embracing Albert & Algernon) and sometimes for strangers (tightly hugging Meredith to calm her down during a fit, patting Charlotte's shoulders to encourage her that she's being a good student). Hell, he can even consent to giving Mickey a hug, whose clingy nature clearly annoys Arthur.

He might have a hard time expressing it in words, but he's pretty damn consistent in physically expressing his care for his loved ones and humans he likes in general.

Obviously, I'm not saying this is always the right thing to do, and I don't endorse running around town and throwing your arms around strangers (please don't do that). But I very much appreciate the authenticity of this physical affection/kindness for an equestrian, and I especially appreciate it being attached to a tough-guy character who goes through life using his body as weapon and tool of intimidation. It offers us an enormous amount of information about the role Arthur has been groomed to play in life versus the sort of person he naturally is.

#arthur morgan #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #redmeta

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hypersomniagame · 3 months

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HYPERSOMNIA JANUARY DEV LOG : "LOG 1, WOOHOO!"

Hi! For all of you who follow HYPERSOMNIA, or are just stopping by, let me introduce you to this post to really set the tone.

For 2024, I am going to try to release a dev log about HYPERSOMNIA once a month, may come earlier, may come a little late, but I'm doing this to help give insight on to how the game is going, and to give me motivation to work on the game.

First things first, big news!

HYPERSOMNIA IS NOW AVAILABLE TO WISHLIST ON STEAM! (LINK)

After a while of back and forwarding with Valve, I've finally got a Steam page to call my own, and MAN is it bizarre seeing my weird little RPG in my Steam library. Like, that's my logo, and my key art, and screenshots of MY game, that's so weird. It doesn't feel real. BUT IT IS!

And, I would really really really really really appreciate it if you would consider wishlisting the game on Steam. It helps with the algorithm, and my happiness because I like seeing numbers go up, it feels good.

I even drew this as a announcement/commemoration for the page going live.

(P.S; if you couldn't tell, I really like Half-Life, it's one of my favorite game series.)

Secondly...

A new trailer is in the works! We were accepted for this year's MOTHER Direct (4th time baby, whoo!)

The trailer has been coming along well, I hope to show more battle oriented clips that I've missed the last few years, like special moves.

Can you believe I've never actually gotten to adding those in the game? I mean, they come set-up in default RPG Maker projects but I've never gotten around to revamping them until now, year 4 of engine work. Isn't that strange?

I also hope to improve on editing in the trailers. Whenever I finish a trailer I come back a few months later to notice minor points where I was kinda sloppy.

I'm not much of a video editor, (I only learned so I could edit trailers on my own) but I'd like to keep them at a good presentable quality. You gotta have standards with that kinda stuff, it's important!

OK, TIME FOR THE ACTUAL GAME STUFF. HERE WE GO.

Abilities are now implemented! And work! Wahoo!

In HYPERSOMNIA, players are able to switch abilities between party members. I find this a really interesting mechanic for how simple it seems, you get to choose who plays what role in your party. I think this is HUGE, and opens up a lot of unique scenarios for the game's encounters. I've had this planned for years, as far back as 2021 if I can recall, so it's super cool seeing it in game.

Mapping is being worked on!

I've also been working on mapping out more areas of the game! The forest part you hopefully saw in the last trailer is almost completely mapped. I've been working on the second part to it and am hoping to finish it sometime soon.

Mapping forests really suck. THOUGH, almost all the maps for the first chapter of the game are done! That's just another step closer to the demo. (Which, FYI, will be on Steam and Itch! ^^)

I've also been working on re-spriting older scenes!

This one's been really fun to do, I've been going back and redoing older stuff from the 2022 trailer, like this train! It's weird seeing it side by side, because you can definitely see where it's come from but at the same time, it looks so different.

(Also side note, these sprites are CRUSTY! EWWW!)

Lastly, Script and Music updates!

The script for HYPERSOMNIA's first act has been completed! with just 37 pages of just cutscene dialog alone! We're also currently working on wrapping up NPC dialog! Not much else to say.

And music is being worked on!

Music has been making some progress! I like to lay out demo's for areas I'm mapping out to help make both the music and scene come together. (Also, to help break up the eerie silence when playtesting...)

Speaking of music, FIREBALL, the games main battle theme, was recently delisted on our YouTube channel.

We did this because we decided we wanted to resample FIREBALL, and found that it's best to not have the song uploaded until a complete, final version is made. At least for the demo, it could possibly change before the final game but that's a bit too far in the future for me to think about fully.

Hey! Thanks for reading the whole dev log! Unless you just skipped to the end, you should probably go back up and read it. there's a steam page now. and some cool ross art at the top. you're missing out!

I hope this was like, readable to you all. I'm new to this whole dev log thing, so if you read it all the way through, let me know! It'd be cool!

I'd like to use this portion to pretty much just advertise Unique Indie RPG's.

Have you ever seen that strange purple square at the beginning of the 2nd and 3rd HYPERSOMNIA trailers?

Yeah, that! That's UNIQUE INDIE RPG's, which is a Discord community for you guessed it, Unique Indie RPG videogames developed by people like me! Or you! Or whoever! Who cares!

I help run it with some of my friends, and we all share cool stuff about our videogames! There's a ton of other SUPER cool RPG Maker games there like Astral Guard [LINK], or SOMEWHEN [LINK], or even MOMOinc [LINK]!

And of course, HYPERSOMNIA. It's a really laid back community, we're all super chill. Come swing by! We'd love to have ya, and SHOW US YOUR GAME!

[LINK TO DISCORD SERVER]

TWITTER

YOUTUBE

STEAM

UNIQUE INDIE RPG'S [SHOW US YOUR GAME!]

[PREV] [ABOUT HYPERSOMNIA] [NEXT]

#hypersomniagame #rpgmaker #indie dev #updates #dev log #rpg #indiedev #earthbound #unique indie rpgs

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bitter-rabbitholes · 26 days

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As someone who likes the character of Elizabeth and well to some extent Cielizzy. I think something people should take into account is that they both don't know each other deeply and only have an idea of what the other is.

I think what happened from Lizzy's "betrayal" to Ciel is important. Because first he makes Ciel deal with the consequences of lying to everyone he knows. Yes he have good reasons to lie but that doesn't mean people will be any less upset with Ciel because He openly LIED to their faces and even more so considering that he used the identity of his "dead" brother.

Lizzy makes sense in feeling hurt and betrayed because first they lied to her face and played with her feelings. But it is necessary because she must finally question why she "loves" Ciel. And what meaning does her indentity and life have next to Ciel (who she really doesn't know at all) I hope Lizzy can finally decide what she wants for herself and not what she expects from her and decides to return to Ciel (or Sirius?) and maybe finally THEY CAN SPEAK THINGS WITH THE TRUTH And well, maybe Lizzy will finally decide BY OWN DECISION to love Ciel/Sirius.🩷 And as for Ciel, I'm not sure how things will be on his side, but maybe he'll finally know and understand Elizabeth, and well, who knows, maybe he'll appreciate Lizzy more. 💙

Although knowing Yana I have the feeling that this could end very badly and painfully 💔But well just my thoughts I love your content of Elizabeth and Ciel 💕hasta aquí mi reporte Joaquín 👍

YES! this is everything I find interesting about them. that Ciel and Lizzy only know an idea of each other. they both hide behind masks and rely on each other for their identity as "Ciel" and "Lizzy". they've both been using each other to play their roles, but that's what makes their bond so strong to me? because that constant devotion, even when it comes to sacrificing themselves, is their sense of love.

And the betrayal!! that's what i don't understand fandom, the betrayal was incredibly well-written! fans just place the burden of the relationship on Lizzy constantly "oh she should've just asked first, how could she not trust him?" um... why would he answer her. why would she ask him?? her not trusting him is what kicked off this arc! how could they ever be honest with each other when this whole time they've been playing pretend!

and that's what im trying to get to here, that Lizzy's just like Ciel. she placed all her pride on being a fiancee, made an identity out of it. "how could Lizzy lie? how could she not trust him?" well just like how Ciel lied! like how Ciel didn't trust her, she's mirroring him! she repaid him for how he lied to her for all 4 years in one fell swoop! people cry about her not communicating, but this was the best way for her to communicate. how it felt for all those years not to matter, the humiliation of being lied to, the betrayal.

and im looking forward to them meeting again and speaking honestly for once. i like how you pointed out, it wont be just Lizzy coming to understand Ciel (the burden still falling on her) but Ciel coming to understand her too! how tragic it'll end up, i cant say for sure, I feel like Kuro kinda lost it's edge (i know, snake and agni, but an even more prominent character needs to die before i change my mind) ...and yana does have a soft spot for Ciel and Lizzy. however it turns out, as long as the characters are giving justice im happy.

anyway thanks for enjoying my writing lol, its kinda all over the place lol, but im planning more bigger posts in the future. i hope you'll enjoy them 🤞🏽💕

#hiya!!#thanks for the ask!!#kuro #cielizzy #o!ciel #elizabeth midford #theyre being so not normal about this

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maxbegone · 8 months

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seven sentence sunday but once again, who's actually counting?

gonna be honest with y'all, i still have no idea what this fic really is, but i'm having a good time writing it!

“Where’s…Big Bend National Park?” Henry asks out of nowhere.

It’s enough for Alex to pull his attention from the stars. “Um, like six hours west of here. I didn’t even know you knew what that was. Why?”

Henry shrugs. “Sheer curiosity.”

“It’s never just curiosity with you. There’s usually some meaning behind it.” Alex sits up. “What’s important about Big Bend?”

“A lot of westerns were filmed there,” he tells him.

“Oh yeah? I never knew that.”

But then it takes less than a second for it to hit him: the tight-lipped smile, the soft hum of a short laugh, the way Henry angles his head briefly before looking down at his lap, fingers drumming against the neck of the wine bottle.

“Your dad filmed something there.”

“One of his first big roles,” Henry begins, “a few years before he and my mum met and he had his Bond run. It’s less famous than them, obviously, but I’d argue it was just as good.”

“What’s it called?”

“All For the Autumn Son.”

“I’ve never seen it,” Alex tells him softly. “What’s it about?”

“Oh, the usual; outlaws and bandits, heists, a corrupt and cornered sheriff. He makes a deal with a group to free their bookkeeper from prison, only to be killed before they overrun the town and take it hostage. Then this lone wolf type comes into play and drums up a plan to save everyone, there’s romance and a routine ride into the sunset.”

“Who did your dad play?”

“The hero.” At this, Henry smiles, chin titled up toward the sky. He looks so proud, and Alex has never been as sad as he is at this moment that he was never able to meet Arthur Fox. “It really is cheesy and Dad’s accent is…something else.” Henry laughs, and it’s a little more genuine this time. “I mean, it works, but it’s odd to hear when I’m so used to his voice, you know? But for all it’s worth, it’s brilliant.”

“Is it your favorite?”

Henry pauses for a moment. “Yeah.” Another pause. “It’s weird that any time I want to see or hear my father, all I have to do is turn on the telly. Literally the whole world knows him as this action hero, but he was so much more than that. They know one side of him — the actor side — and this might be hard to understand, but everyone gets to see him and there’s no sanctity in it.” Henry glances over at Alex, and even in the dim orange light of the fire, he can make out the emotion in his eyes. “He was world-renowned, beloved, it’s not like he was some random man from Cardiff. Everyone knew him, but not everyone knew him. They can miss him, but not like all of us do. He was our dad, and yet sometimes it feels like he doesn’t belong to us. Which is a whole convoluted thing with how my entire life has been; it belongs to the Crown, it belongs to England.”

It’s then that Henry releases a hefty breath and lowers himself down onto the grass, he and Alex swapping positions. Alex just watches.

“Maybe that’s why I love his lesser-known movies more, because less people have seen them, even if it’s only by a marginal amount. It makes it feel…more, I don’t know, personal.”

Henry’s right, Alex never is going to understand it. He’s lucky enough not to know what it’s like to lose a parent that young. And the thing is, until Henry, Alex never even thought to consider himself lucky about it. But there’s a whole other level of appreciation he has now, one he hopes he never neglects.

“Maybe I drank too much today,” Henry says mildly, sitting up again and shaking the bottle. There’s a little under a quarter of the wine left. “Getting all emotional.”

“No.” Alex scoots in closer, rubbing circles on his back. He’s warm through his shirt. “No, baby. It’s okay. Don’t minimize it.”

He watches as Henry goes to say something, but closes his mouth. “I—thank you, Alex.”

“What for?”

“Always listening.”

Alex could melt. “It’s the easiest thing in the world.”

i have no idea who to tag y'all, so feel free to share if you can!

#rwrb #rwrb fic #firstprince #firstprince fic #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #seven sentence sunday #my fic

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spencerdaze · 9 months

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'Barbie' is a transgender masterpiece

I'm going to go away from my usual clown related content for this post, but i've watched Barbie twice now, and aside from the movie painting a beautiful portrait about men's rol in feminism as well as reivindicating being a mother is ok, the movie has proven to be a transgender masterpiece in many ways, just like Barbie as a figure! Buckle up because this is going to be a long, long post.

For startes, fashion dolls, and specifically Barbie as the most important of them, has been a queer icon more than a feminist icon. Feminism has distanced itself from Barbie as a figure because her representation of womanhood was faulty (something i disagree on, since Barbie was a powerful successful woman who didn't let that make her not be interested in fashion and other feminine hobbies and interests!!), but the queer community has, i feel, a different appreciation for Barbie as a character and doll. Gay men, drag queens and transfemme folks mostly share memories of playing with Barbie and dreaming, via the doll, about the lifes we could have as adults. Barbie was a very important role for many drag queens who loved the glamour and fashion, it helped gay men relate to female friends who where more friendly and safe (usually although not always) than other boys, and it helped us trans women and femme enby folks to distance ourselves from the masculinity society tried to force on us. Barbie has also proven to be an icon for lesbians since, i mean, nobody ever bought a Ken doll, and even for some trans men who used Barbie dolls transitioned into boy dolls to enact heteroromantic fantasies! The union between Barbie and feminism is a faulty one, and i can't blame the feminist movement for it, but the relationship between Barbie and the queer community is very real and strong. It's no surprise that many trans women and drag queens use the term 'doll' to refer to themselves, or that Ken has always been a sort of feminine and, let's be honest, queer man.

So how is the new Greta Gerwig Barbie movie transgender ? Well, Barbie herself, as a protagonist, is such a real transfemme experience! Barbie moves from Barbieland to the real world, learning what it really is to be a woman in the real life world of California, much like many trans women have to look at the world around them to learn and internalize their new lifes at the beginning of their transitions. Barbie also says, explicitly, that she doesn't have a vagina, or genitals, and by the end of the movie she decides to turn into a human, and goes to her gynecologist, which implies she went from not having a vagina to having one. Isn't this the most trans thing ever ?? Of course there are some problematic implications in this reading of the movie, because Barbie turns into 'a real woman' and gets a vagina, which is not what being a real woman is, but i also think this is a very powerful messaging. Consider also some minor details like the fact the color palette used for Barbie is one with blue and white added to her always bright Barbie Pink, which isn't odd since Barbie has used this combo before, but it cannot be a coincidence. Barbie going from a hyperfeminine woman to a more laidback woman is also very parallel to a lot of trans women's experiences, since many of us behave and are hyperfeminine from an early stage in our transitions because of dysphoria but then we become more comfortable in ourselves and realize that we don't own anyone hyperfemininity (even though i am, still, a hyperfeminine woman, but it's more in my own terms of femininity!!) Of course, we also have Hari Neff, a trans actress, as a Barbie in Barbieland, which is amazing, and in one scene we see that, in the Mattel headquarters, there's a small transgender sign in the wall, which is subtle, but still there.

This movie has so many queer undertones and experiences, showing Ken dolls that were queer coded in the market like Magic Ring Ken and also proving how patriarchal relationships between men are very homoerotic in a way, which is shown in how Ken interacts with other Kens and viceversa. Weird Barbie is also a very much queer character, being played by a lesbian actress, and i feel like the movie is so campy and has such an aesthetic that reminds us of queer movies like But I'm a Cheerleader. We also have to aknowledge the references to big queer favourite and queer films like Matrix and Wizard of Oz. I think this reading of the movie is definetly plausible and i hope to hear some of your thoughts!

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sessayyys-corner · 4 months

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GOMBURZA (2023) - MMFF REVIEW

“Vivan Los Filipinos. Mabuhay ang mga Filipino.”

This film is the story of the three martyr priests. Three Filipinos who were part of the native community who were once under Spanish colonial rule and oppression. If you have been updated, or have been listening in your elementary Philippine history classes, it’s GOMBURZA, not MAJOHA.

Despite it being produced by Jesuit Communications, the film was able to execute (No pun intended) a factual depiction on a turning point of Philippine history without overused emphasis of religion. It was able to capture how the Catholic faith was used as an instrument of oppression during the Spanish colonial period (This was especially ironic considering how return of the religious orders, including the Jesuits, were the reason for the silencing of the secularization movement). What also impressed me is that almost every single detail in the movie, even in the dialogue, came from actual events in history. It is evident that enough research was made to make this film as accurate as possible.

The film’s cinematography was able to capture life during the period whether it was amongst the Filipino liberals, the Spanish priests, the Governor-Generals, or even the three main characters in our story. With every other scenes of the film shifting from light to dark atmospheres, this symbolized the reality of Spanish colonization — warmth, acceptance, and friendship amongst fellow Filipinos; and ruthlessness, inhumanity, and oppression from the Spaniards (and even traitors). Adding emphasis to GomBurZa’s (2023) cinematography is its sound design. Just by feeling the cinema floor rumbling and the deeply-voiced voiceover in the film’s ending segment, this film can come to a point where it deserves its own IMAX screening.

Dante Rivero and Cedrick Juan showcase over-the-top stellar performances as Padre Mariano Gomez (played by Rivero) and Padre Jose Burgos (played by Juan). Both actors have embodied their roles, not only due to the fact that they, especially Juan, share a slight resemblance with the real life Mariano Gomez and Jose Burgos. It is also because that they were able to portray their emotions from having a friendly conversation, to later condemning their unfair arrest, trial, and death.

Pepe Diokno's time and effort in conducting research and including every important detail in the production is evident in the whole film itself, as it was not only ACTUALLY based on true events, but was able to evoke emotion and outrage, just like how the Filipinos of the 1870s did at the time.

With all of this said, GomBurZa (2023) is not only a history lesson, but also an immersion into the Spanish colonial rule and the lives of the three priests. Being a history nerd and a cinephile who has since learned the names of the three martyr priests as a little girl in elementary, I can definitely say that this was one of the only film experiences where I had witnessed the breaking of the fourth wall. The whole time I was in the cinema, it felt like I was part of their conversation, like I was a witness to their lives and execution.

What also added to this experience was that I watched the film on Rizal Day, and what better way to commemorate our national hero's contribution to Philippine independence than to learn about where it all started? Like what I always preached to my family:

Without GomBurZa, there will be no Jose Rizal. Without Jose Rizal, there would be no Andres Bonifacio. Without all of them, the Philippines and the Filipino would not exist.

GomBurZa (2023) is a cathartic experience that is definitely for the family. This film is a testament to the importance of appreciating and learning our history. Hopefully it serves as a reminder of our collective past, national identity, and the importance of our freedom.

[Metro Manila Film Festival 2023]

(my film review of "GomBurZa" is also available on letterboxd!)

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my-current-obsession · 3 months

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My Next Life as a Villainess VN - Thoughts

Considering the source material, I was surprised at how good this game was! It's unsurprisingly light-hearted and comedic, but most of the CGs are still great and the romances mostly worked. I appreciated how despite Catarina's black-hole level of denseness causing issues in basically every route, everyone tackled it differently and every relationship felt unique.

My biggest complaint is just that we were robbed of routes with the girls outside a "normal/friendship" ending, since the girls canonically ALSO love Catarina. Getting three extra routes for Mary, Sophia, and Maria would have been SO GOOD. But Alas.

While this game and story is definitely meant for fans of the light novels and/or anime, I think there's plenty of information for people new to the series to still enjoy it. I also appreciate how much content is added to the common route as you complete the routes of love interests. Expect SPOILERS below the cut, as I go into detail on my thoughts for each route.

My play order was:

Alan -> Keith -> Geordo -> Rozy -> Nicol -> Silva

Common Route: I won't linger too long on this, since the common route in this case was pretty short. It did its job, setting up the plot and introducing us to all the important characters, both new and old. But in terms of notable interactions with the love interests or MAJOR plot points, there isn't much of notice yet. All the choices that give affection for the guys pre-route split lead to very brief tangents/conversations, nothing substantial.

We do meet and immediately befriend Rozy in the common route, which is nice. Silva by comparison barely features here, but he's ALL OVER basically every route, so his absence here is honestly fine.

I do like that we learn about the sachets and their connection to Ryle Werder, since that plays an important role in several routes. The Witch's Eye, by comparison, perhaps receives TOO MUCH attention in the common route. It's only relevant in NICOL'S route and yet we learn about it when meeting ROZY, which seems odd.

Alan: Not counting the girls, when I watched the anime, Alan was my favorite love interest. Hence, I decided to start with him. And I wasn't disappointed! I like that it's pretty clear under "normal" circumstances that despite his love for Catarina, Alan would never rock the boat and confess to her. He acknowledges and respects that she's engaged to Geordo, and he's engaged to Mary.

Thus, for this love to bloom, the pair kind of NEEDS to be separated from the group and spend some quality time together, which is just what we get. Interacting one-on-one, these two have a very casual and easy relationship that appeals to me. They get along well and Alan is mostly charmed by Catarina's eccentricities. His one real problem with her is that she is reckless to the point of endangering her own life, and that's a fair criticism I think.

Since Alan wasn't planning on confessing, his struggle to "get through" to Catarina is mostly about making her understand that being reckless hurts and upsets the people that care about her, which he finally inadvertently succeeds at by... getting hurt himself while protecting her, causing HER to be upset.

It's a very sweet and subtly romantic moment, which I liked a lot. I like how this route, particularly the "memory scenario" bits, seemed to imply that deep down, subconsciously, Catarina ALWAYS has liked and favored Alan. He's the one she likes to just... hang out and spend time with, and thus when they spend a certain amount of time alone and have some (mostly accidental) romantic moments, she's quick to Catch Feelings, even if she takes a bit to acknowledge them.

The cherry on top to this route was his confession and how it was handled. When Alan accidentally confesses his feelings while saving Catarina from Frederic, due to her hangups about the whole "I'm a villainess in an otome game and all the guys should love Maria" thing she initially wants to doubt or misinterpret it - but Silva (who had earlier called out and WEAPONIZED Alan's feelings for his own gain) is quick to correct her, forcing her to acknowledge it. But the pair don't get to talk it out right away, leaving them to be noticeably awkward around each other until they do.

Only then, when it's unavoidable and necessary, does Alan fully confess. Because he knows Catarina NEEDS to hear this in order to fix their current relationship. But he immediately follows it up by telling her to forget it all - because he's genuinely content with just being friends with her and doesn't want to ruin things between her and Geordo.

I appreciate how much Alan is selfless and trying to do the right thing - and I appreciate it even more, comparing it to other routes to come. And Catarina refuses to forget because simply finding out how he feels is enough to make her recognize her own feelings, but she similarly resolves to talk things out with Geordo and Mary before confessing. The respect paid to their "official" partners and trying to properly end things before starting anything together is mature and wonderful, to the point where in Alan's happy end Geordo (reluctantly, but still entirely of his own volition, without outside pressure) gives them his blessing. It's sweet and satisfying.

Also, sidenote - I genuinely liked Liliana a lot as a side character and was disappointed she wasn't in any other route. On the other hand, that means she got to witness and support JUST Alan's romance and none of the others, so...

Keith: I won't lie, this is my least favorite route from a plot AND relationship standpoint. While basically ALL the other love interests find Catarina charming and endearing, it bothers me how Keith is always criticizing her. He loves her, but he's constantly trying to get her to act like a "proper noblewoman" instead of embracing her as she is. And from the perspective of a SIBLING, that's fine. But I HATE it when you're actively trying to mold your love interest's behavior and personality.

Across all the routes Catarina must have dreaded Keith lecturing her (explicitly acting like her mother, at that) more times than I could count. That's just NOT romantic. At all. And isn't a dynamic that can/should be TURNED romantic, IMO.

Another big turnoff for me is that Keith is one of two love interests who has... let's say a sense of entitlement to Catarina. He's actively hidden his feelings for years, AND YET he hates the idea of her with anyone else and actively tries to keep her away from her more aggressive suitors like Geordo. Unlike Alan and Nicol, who acknowledge their feelings but WILL NOT act on them in usual circumstances, Keith monopolizes Catarina's attention when he can and actively WANTS to be with her romantically... all while excusing the time and attention he gets by saying it's his right as her BROTHER.

The underhanded nature of how he gets her attention and his ulterior motives bothers me. At least Geordo is UPFRONT with his possessiveness and intentions, even if Catarina is too dense to notice.

On Catarina's end... I just struggle to buy her suddenly falling in love with him. This route makes it clear Keith is "special" in that she's quick to notice if he's not feeling well physically or emotionally; Catarina likes to TAKE CARE OF and DOTE ON Keith. That's pretty in-line with her seeing him as her brother, and honestly that same care and attention comes across in other routes where she clearly loves him PLATONICALLY, so it's hard for me to accept that not only does she quickly fall in love with him here but she confesses FIRST before Keith makes his own feelings clear.

As for the rest of this route's plot, I barely remember it. I wasn't invested in the conflict here - and that's not the case in most routes. Alan's route interested me with the relationship drama of Ryle & Liliana, Silva and Rozy had big political issues, and Nicol's was supernatural. Only Geordo's route was similarly dull in terms of non-romance content. The main thing I took away from the conflict here is I was unhappy how Keith's conflict of feeling weak and unable to protect Catarina was handled.

Rather than learning he didn't HAVE to protect her, that he was important/valuable to her without that, or something along those lines (leading to a more mutual and open dynamic, theoretically), it's resolved by... him finally being able to protect her. He had a BAD personal arc on top of a BAD romance on top of a BORING overall route/conflict.

Geordo: Like Keith, Geordo is pretty possessive and "entitled" to Catarina. Unlike Keith, I can at least somewhat understand why. He's literally engaged to her and has been for years. Beyond just his own hopes/feelings, there is an expectation that he WILL marry her eventually. I also appreciate that while he's initially not that forward, he's still open and obvious about his romantic affections. It's just that Catarina is PARTICULARLY dense with him.

She struggles to believe anyone could fall for her when Maria is Right There, but Geordo in particular she struggled to win over "in game", and despite years to get used to the idea she still doesn't seem to realize how much people and relationships have changed due to her actions. Thus she can't envision him EVER loving her romantically and finds a way to misinterpret his every action.

Whereas Keith just kind of... snapped and wasn't able to hold back his feelings in his route after spending too much time alone with Catarina, Geordo by comparison is very DELIBERATE in making more aggressive moves. And again, I think it's narratively justified albeit kinda messed up. While he is used to the usual rivals and felt relatively secure that they wouldn't/couldn't steal Catarina out from under him... suddenly Silva enters the equation and NOW he feels threatened.

As a pirate, Silva wouldn't care about Geordo's title or his claim to Catarina. If he chooses to steal her away or if Catarina just comes to like him, there's NOTHING Geordo can really do. Thus, he couldn't afford to be patient anymore and he got desperate.

He thought he had time to win her over, but now he had to progress things FAST or risk losing her. His actions make sense, and by making his feelings clear earlier on in the route, Catarina has more time to think about it and figure out her own feelings.

I think it's notable that none of the other love interests, despite their own feelings for Catarina and their frustration for how Geordo handles things (since he says some nasty things and unintentionally hurts her while revealing his feelings), actually try to PREVENT Geordo from "winning" Catarina. The girls even come around to SUPPORTING him despite loving Catarina as well.

Geordo's "entitlement" to her is reasonable. He's not guaranteed her love, but he is the most justified in expecting it and acting possessive by virtue of their engagement. While Mary may plot to run away with her, while Keith might secretly want her for himself, while Sophia tries to push Nicol to pursue her... EVERYONE acknowledges on some level that unless Catarina actively falls for someone else (which looks increasingly unlikely as time goes by), Geordo IS her endgame by default. And they respect that. They are all prepared for this marriage to eventually happen; Geordo by comparison on other routes is typically NOT prepared for Catarina to suddenly fall for someone and want to break things off.

His crime is of being complacent and then poorly handling it when he realizes just that. I personally can forgive that a lot easier than Keith's... everything, and a lot of what happens in Rozy's route, too.

On Catarina's end, the extra time she got to think about Geordo's feelings and re-contextualize a lot of their earlier interactions while also being more aware of the romantic implications of later ones served her well. While I personally imagine Alan and Nicol as the two guys she's lowkey into "by default" judging from their routes, it was easy enough to see Geordo's efforts to win her over actually paying off near the end, and her accidentally acknowledging her realization of "maybe I love Geordo" out loud, TO HIS FACE, was great. The non-romance plot of this route was fairly dull, but I found the romance very engaging so it evens out!

Rozy: I was impatient and just had to give one of the new love interests a go before doing Nicol. I have very mixed feelings about this route. On the one hand, as a new character, I found Rozy very attractive in terms of his appearance and personality. And many of his interactions with Catarina were sweet and endearing. On the other hand I have two MAJOR issues that hampered my enjoyment of specifically his relationship with Catarina, A LOT.

Problem one is that, plain and simple, Rozy was TOO devoted and obsessed with her based off ONE, BRIEF interaction 8 years ago. I understand that she inspired him and changed his life without meaning to, but he just... takes it too far. I can rationalize him looking into her immediately afterwards to learn her name. I can get behind him thinking back to that moment and hoping to meet her again one day, to thank her.

But he went as far as HIRING people to check up on her and tell him all about her, years later. That's just STALKING. Through a proxy, yes, but stalking nonetheless. Which is not okay. Ever. It doesn't help that outside of this one "flaw" - being TOO devoted, to the point of clear obsession, which is noted in story to be a flaw his entire family has - he's basically perfect in a way NONE of the other love interests are. I'm genuinely not sure if I would have preferred a literally flawless Gary Stu love interest or... this, which was gross.

Problem two was Albert's interference and the DISRESPECT to Geordo this route had. In general I'm wary of other characters in a story "shipping" anyone together - passively rooting for something like Liliana did is typically fine, but very active matchmaking is grating - but WOW was Albert a busybody about getting Rozy and Catarina together. When he was talking politics I was engaged and enjoying him, but whenever he turned his attention to playing matchmaker, I just felt frustrated.

He's MEANT to be eccentric, but this is really how a king is spending his valuable time? In particular the way he outmaneuvered Geordo so that Catarina and Rozy could fake-date For Reasons, and even PULLED RANK on him, threatening to end his and Catarina's engagement BEFORE Rozy had even confessed, was infuriating.

What gets me is that his interference was ENTIRELY unnecessary. There were plenty of moments between Rozy and Catarina to justify their mutual feelings without him poking his nose in it, and despite being clearly unhappy about it Geordo HAS proven to be reasonable about letting Catarina go when she actually falls for someone else. It's not like Albert's actions prompted Rozy to confess; he was going to do so ANYWAY. All Albert did was piss off and disrespect Geordo. In theory his actions SHOULD cause political issues between Quid and Sorcier, which he wants to prevent, and yet...

This was the one route where I liked the plot outside the romance significantly more than the romance itself. The political drama and intrigue was engaging, and I loved seeing Rozy and Silva interact. They have a genuinely sweet dynamic. It was also cute seeing Rozy's dad gush over him - a more normal, healthy (yet embarrassing) way to express the family's overly-affectionate trait.

The conflict with the premier Cet Norden was... a bit sloppily handled though. It bothers me that like 90% of his backstory and motivation was in an optional "memory scenario". Was an optional exposition dump really the best they could do? No way to incorporate any of that into the story naturally? By comparison the conflicts are much better integrated in Alan, Nicol, and Silva's routes.

I have a third minor issue with this route (and to a lesser extent, Nicol and Silva's) - it's frustrating that even AFTER finding out Rozy is associated with the pirates, he continues to hide shit and only comes clean when he can't avoid it any longer. Silva's route fully explains WHY - they're trying to secretly handle this so they don't have to work with and be indebted to Sorcier. But the politics of that choice are, in itself, kind of disgusting. Thinking rationally, Rozy chose to endanger who knows how many Sorcier nobles by keeping things secret, and even if their lives are kept safe by the "pirates", they're still under extreme emotional stress due to the situation. They even go so far as to plan for ships from Quid to "rescue" the Sorcier nobles, making them feel indebted rather than the other way around! The entire plot/conflict of this game could have been avoided if saving lives mattered more than politics.

Nicol: This route took an interesting turn into the supernatural. There is an entirely unique conflict (on top of the existing ones, which... still exist and take up nearly half the route), and I quite enjoyed it. I do think it needed more time to shine, though. The witch is only properly introduced more than halfway through the route, and that conflict is resolved surprisingly fast and easily.

As for romance, this route actually worked way better than I expected going into it. I'm not typically into aloof love interests that don't emote much, but I think it helped that we got to spend a lot of time from Nicol's perspective so I could see what he was thinking and feeling, even if it wasn't clear from his expressions and voice.

I mentioned that I think Catarina is lowkey into Alan and Nicol "by default" earlier. Alan I explained in his section - she subconsciously seeks him out and pays him special attention, to the frustration of her other love interests.

Nicol by comparison she is more OVERTLY into, but it's initially shallow. Nicol has a "mysterious allure" that exists both in-game and out, and since canonically she hasn't played his route, AND she's the most distant from him out of all her love interests (he's more "my friend's brother" than "MY friend", initially), she's intrigued by and drawn to him in a way she isn't to her other friends. She is Not Immune to his good looks, and he's able to fluster her in a way no one else can, without even meaning to.

Thus, when they actually spend time together and get to know each other, it's actually very EASY for Nicol to win her affections. Lucky for everyone else that he's a good friend and is DETERMINED to keep his feelings to himself. Much like Alan, he has no intention of confessing and attempting to steal (ostensibly) Geordo's Girl, and I respect him for that.

I was honestly really into the tension between Geordo and Nicol this route, where out of respect and friendship Nicol was trying so hard to keep his distance from Catarina but he kept accidentally letting his feelings affect his actions in ways that stepped on Geordo's toes anyway. That said I think there was a missed opportunity regarding how that conflict ended. I think there was a lot of potential for either drama or wholesome friendship if he and Geordo had actually gotten to TALK about it, but they never did.

Nicol spent the entire route not wanting to confess and get between Catarina and Geordo, but then due to the witch's interference he ultimately confessed to Catarina anyway WITHOUT talking it out with Geordo first. Either Nicol needed to find the courage to confront Geordo and at least give him a heads-up that he was going to do this, or even better, Geordo could be a good friend and tell him to shoot his shot (but obviously Geordo himself wouldn't fully give up until it's clear Catarina has fully chosen someone else); either way making it a "may the best man win" situation would have been ideal. Instead Geordo tells Nicol they need to talk AFTER Nicol has confessed and stolen his girl after spending the whole route determined not to do literally just that, and we don't even see the confrontation.

This route is leagues better than Rozy's in "dealing with" Geordo, but not as good as Alan or Silva's. While I wanted Nicol to talk things out with him first, I at least am more accepting of the witch's interference than Albert's. Albert was playing matchmaker and screwing over Geordo in the process, while the witch was personally trying to upset Geordo due to his similarity to her lover that she wanted revenge on, and Nicol and Catarina getting together was more a byproduct of that.

She forced Nicol to spend time with and confess his love to her (in Catarina's body), which made him reconsider his feelings and his passivity, and when he ultimately confessed it was because he couldn't bear for his only confession have been to the witch. It was explicitly for the sake of closure rather than expecting reciprocation, which was a happy surprise.

Ultimately I think this route was very solid all around though it could have been improved in some ways. It also brings another point AGAINST Rozy, because I can't help but feel he WAS trying to pull a last minute Mr. Steal Your Girl despite claiming his confession was just for closure. If you only wanted closure... why did you not also confess in Silva's route, where you spent MORE time with Catarina and thus should have loved her there too? It comes across in hindsight like he cares too much about Silva to come between them but he's willing to try his luck with Catarina's other love interests.

Silva: It's rare for me to love the true/favored love interest in otome, but this is definitely an exception. His route was so good! I already liked Silva a fair amount from what I'd seen in other routes - not only is his design very appealing, but his Honorable Rogue shtick was right up my alley. So I went in with fairly high hopes and honestly still got way better than I expected.

I appreciated that while he and Catarina definitely get along right from the start, he WASN'T immediately into her. It was refreshing after literally all of her other love interests being in love with her from the start of the story (including new character Rozy, who either fell in love as a child or immediately fell for her upon reuniting). Silva's "romantic" scenes in the early parts of his route definitely felt like he was flirting more just because he's USED to getting women's attention and he was testing her reactions, rather than him genuinely trying to woo her. Instead, it's her complete trust and faith in him (despite him being a "pirate" and having a somewhat shady past that he initially tries to hide) that really warms him to her.

Either intentionally or accidentally, this pair kept stealing moments alone together, and almost every one served to bring them just a bit closer together. You could really feel their relationship shifting from strangers to acquaintances to friends to ultimately lovers. They were BOTH gradually getting to know and falling for the other, rather than it being largely one party trying to win over the other.

And while Geordo has a relatively small role in this route and isn't really addressed until the ending... I think that works. As I mentioned in Geordo's route, he was complacent and assumed his "victory" was secure. He might have been initially paranoid, but he took reassurance from Silva initially saying Catarina was like a little sister and didn't consider that those feelings might change. But then unbeknownst to him, Catarina ended up spending A LOT of time with Silva (and as I said, those moments often happened to be ALONE, so no one else truly knew just HOW close they were getting), and falling for him. Basically, Geordo was caught sleeping on the job in this route and by the time he considered Silva a threat, it was too late.

One aspect of this route I really loved was Silva's interactions and dynamic with Rozy and the Lindgren family. It's so clear how much Rozy and his father truly love Silva, and Silva loves them too but is reluctant to officially join their family because doing so would cause a minor scandal. He'd rather keep a wall between them than burden them in any way because he feels indebted and unworthy, while they WANT him in the family and would happily accept any trouble he brings.

Heck, Rozy loves Silva enough that he didn't hesitate to back off when he noticed Silva getting close to Catarina, despite presumably being in love with her himself! The subtle way he gave the pair his blessing through giving Silva the notebook that had her picture - something he had in the past told Silva he "couldn't give" him, despite Silva's curiosity - was honestly sublime. One of my favorite moments in the entire game.

I also adored Silva opening up about his family and culture to Catarina, and then how he used that unique culture to woo her. Even before the reveal, the ear kisses were SO GOOD and clearly affecting her. In the end, when he revealed it was actually a sign that he was courting her? Buddy, that's too smooth!

Speaking of his confession, I loved that initially it seemed he was going to just confess his feelings and then back off, leaving the ball in her court. He wanted her to know how he felt before she left, since it would be who knows how long before they saw each other again, if ever, but he didn't intend to pressure her. It was only AFTER she instinctively stopped and clung to him - after she'd given him some small indication that she reciprocated - that he made a move. And what a move it was! The way he warned her to stop him or leave if she didn't want this before kissing her, MULTIPLE TIMES, was just... very attractive. He was probably already my favorite before this, but even if he hadn't been, this scene would have pushed him to the top anyway.

And the epilogue is also very lovely, with him having finally been officially adopted by the Lindgren family. He found a reason worth troubling them - so he could have the status and education to "properly" be with her without society putting up a fuss. It's so cute to see her so thrilled to see him again and being so happy and excited at the prospect of marrying him.

Finally, the conflict and drama in this route was once again pretty good. I don't have much to say (mainly because while I DID enjoy the conflict, the romance was just astoundingly solid and stole most of my focus), but everything regarding human experimentation and how Silva was directly linked to it and the antagonist was good. I wish the villain wasn't a brand new character not even SEEN in other routes though (he might have been MENTIONED in one or two other routes, but that's it).

One thing I think this story does REALLY well is the Butterfly Effect of Catarina changing the game's canon (something she hilariously never seems to fully grasp). Her one meeting with Rozy changed his life. And even though she NEVER met Silva as a child, her chance meeting with Rozy also rippled outward and still positively affected Silva, making him radically different than the "in-game" Silva, who most likely WASN'T a romanceable character but a true villain (I find it hard to believe the game would let you romance someone who callously kills several people in his INTRODUCTION and who is part of a pirate crew that is legitimately threatening/evil. I like to imagine Rozy was the true "secret" romance in the fandisk, since he WAS still in the game and on the ship).

Overall I thought this game was great and it far exceeded my expectations. I expected (and got) comedy, but the romances were mostly good and there was more drama and intrigue to many of the plots/conflicts than I expected. I'll definitely be returning to this game to re-experience my favorites.

In terms of my feelings on the routes as a whole, best to worst: Silva -> Alan -> Nicol -> Rozy -> Geordo -> Keith

My feelings on the romance/relationship with Catarina: Silva -> Alan -> Geordo -> Nicol -> Rozy -> Keith

#otome #my next life as a villainess #hamefura #aside from the length the hardest part of this review was consistently using 'c' instead of 'k' for catarina #bc the GAME uses c but i'm like 90% sure when i watched the anime years ago the subs used k & that's what i'm used to

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tuliharja · 8 months

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I decided to join an art contest in the Genshin Impact server that I’m part of. The art contest had two themes “Goodbye Sumeru” or “Welcome to Fontaine” which you could pick either one. I decided to go with the “Goodbye Sumeru” theme. To put it simply, I did extremely poorly in the contest. Despite that, I hope other people who will see this artwork, will appreciate this because making this artwork wasn’t that simple.

Artwork: @tuliharja

Note: I’m fine with reblogging, but ask me first for my permission, if you want to repost my artwork.

More of my thoughts/things about this artwork under the cut.

I rarely do large pieces like these, especially when I’m busy. July-August are often a very busy months for me because most of my friends/loved ones have special days and I usually draw them gift artworks. I also had a lot of real-life things going on, so thinking back to everything…joining the art contest was basically a gamble, what came to timewise. I had to do a lot of research when drawing this picture, and looked at several reference photos of the characters their clothes, and such. Also, I had to wrack my brain when I shaded the whole pic because it has been a while since I have done black and white artwork. Despite that, it was very fun shading it.

Anyway, I picked the theme “Goodbye Sumeru”, because instantly when I read that theme name, I had this image of a traveler (in this case Lumine) and Paimon waving from the distance to Tighnari and Collei at the Gandharva Ville. It started with them at the Sumeru, so I thought it would only be suitable for our heroine and her best companion to wave goodbye to them! Of course, I had to Nahida in the picture, because she was such a big part of Sumeru as a whole. I also instantly imagined her ‘hovering’ on top of Lumine and Paimon as if blessing their journey to Fontaine. This all created the centerpiece.

Once I was done with the centerpiece, I started to think about all the other friends the traveler and Paimon had met along their journey at Sumeru. Originally the picture was supposed to have two additional friends at the sides of the centerpiece, but because of time issues and the lack of space (this drawing is drawn on A4-size paper, which in the end isn’t that big), I settled to ones that appeared most at the Archon quest/I felt played key roles in the story/balancing reasons.

The first additional friend that I wanted to draw was Dunyarzad at the bottom left side. She played quite an important role in the main story quests, so choosing her felt very natural. But what would Dunyarzad be without Dehya who acted as her bodyguard? She became an important ally along the journey. For balance, I started to think of all male characters who appeared in the main quests and played important roles. I figured if I had Dehya who was from the desert, Cyno could be a good counterpart. Not to mention he was quite impactful in the story -at least in my mind. Alhaitham played a big role in the quests and represented in a way opposite of things, so I settled for him. I also considered Kaveh, but because he played such a small role, I scrapped him quickly away. Same with Wanderer, even though at the end of Sumeru's main quests he played quite a big role. Because of that, Nilou also scrapped away very quickly as I felt she didn’t have any ‘good’ counterpart.

Originally, I had also planned to all Layla and Jeth into the picture, because they would have represented the side quests and all other ‘memorable’ (at least to me) moments outside of the main quests. But as I stated earlier, they got scrapped away, mostly because of space issues.

All in all, making this artwork was an interesting experience. There are a few things I would have done differently, if I would had more time, but despite those things, I’m still quite satisfied with the ending result.

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ryuichirou · 4 months

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Replies

Happy Holiday weekend! Here are some replies…

Anonymous asked:

Have you read the Twisted Wonderland manga adaptation yet? I think you would really enjoy them

We haven’t and we don’t really plan to (since Yana Toboso didn’t work on them outside of some tidbits that we’re interested in, such as character’s younger versions design). But the artists for the manga did such a good job, that we really appreciate the art of it whenever we see someone posts it. The Tweels and Azul specifically look amazing.

Anonymous asked:

(with the jadesil asks but also just jade in general) mushrooms do look a bit like a certain... something, no? 🍆

They sure do. I wonder if Jade thinks about it… he certainly noticed it lol Especially considering that both of these things are kind of new to him…

“Oh, but don’t put the mushrooms anywhere please!^^”

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

So you ship CrewelTrein which is funny for me cause I honestly have a AU where Crewel is his out of wedlock child he didn't know about/headcanon as a father figure, so now with this ship being shown and lowkey agreeing with it despite my AU/thoughts now thought of Crewel being a student and being so frustrated by Trein he jerked it once and discovered he has a lot of daddy issues which includes a daddy kink but not him being called daddy or bottoming just Trein being "daddy" and he fucks him

lol I love how it turned into a “daddy issues/daddy kink” but WITH A TWIST

It could be funny if these two discovered they have a blood bond…but even if they don’t and Trein is just a father figure, it’s honestly even more funny, because having him as a father figure certainly didn’t stop Crewel from doing thing lol

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

OKay! BUT! Azul and Floyd walking in on Idia and Riddle either making out (with permission from their doms) or fucking each other with a double sided toy! (inspired by a comic I red of two subs making out before their doms showed up and boom fourway/double sided sex)

Alright, now I gotta know which one of these 4 saw this scenario in their head while they were asleep, because Idia and Riddle are probably the worst people for such a thing: not only they wouldn’t dare to do it by themselves, but to cooperate?? I wonder what would make them… well, ironically, Floyd could lol

(but the visual is like a classic hentai thing and would definitely leave Azul and Floyd kind of speechless lol)

dawnstar-33 asked:

I should be asleep rn but oh well Twst is more important...

Random thoughts I cant share with my friends (smh they wont watch playthroughs with me)

-Does that black streak in the tweels hair not annoy them? I'd be so mad about it especially as I have a similar haircut as the tweels 😭

-Twst x Mean girls!!! I can't remember where I saw it first, but now I can't unsee it! Vil as the one and only Regina George, Rook as Grechen and Cater as Karen! With Neige as Cady (World Burn is playing as I write this...)

-Not sure when I thought of this- Jamil and Kalim (either as a romantic or platonic attraction) with this one quote

"You're my soulmate, my life, but I'm not yours."

And that concludes my random thoughts at 3am 😭🫶

Twst really is more important than sleep lol I hope you sleep well though! And that your friend gives up and treats themselves by watching twst with you >:3

Here are my thoughts regarding your thoughts! Sorry for the late reply.

I think they’re very used to it lol Since they had to maneuver with it underwater ever since they were young… But I can picture Floyd accidentally catching it with his mouth and spitting in annoyance lol

LOVE Mean girls and the musical version is also great, HOWEVER! As someone who simps for both Vil and Regina, I don’t really think they’re similar. Vil has way too much dignity to do the “awww I love it how cute (I hate it it’s ugly)” thing, he’s usually just brutally honest lol And Regina is one messy bitch. Ironically, I feel like Azul fits the role better, despite not necessarily being a queen bee… I can definitely see Vil and Neige playing the roles of Regina and Cady though, it would be interesting. And infuriating for Vil, probably lol

Ohhh this is beautiful and sad. Yeah, Jamil and Kalim’s relationship with each other is quite asymmetrical on every level.

#replies

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titanicfreija · 6 days

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Distractions

Sunny found the empress in the Hall of Heroes, standing tall at the doorway they normally started through. "You wanted to talk?" the Ghost asked sweetly.

Caiatl grunted and turned to lumber down the hallway, posture heavy and steps plodding. "I wanted you to talk. I am weary and would appreciate the company of a friend," she replied.

Sunny whirled around and wheeled. It was a relief that she knew Sunny needed the instructions, she must have been getting used to her habits.

"I have good news, then! We got to dig into Thomas's previous life, and Freija asked him about his history! Rex never told us! I have no idea wh-- actually, I do."

Caiatl's relief showed immediately, shoulders relaxing and weight resting on her heels. Her breath even slowed down.

Sunny figured she would only be half listening, but she was happy to have the audience, and even happier to be a relief to someone that needed it.

"So this roommate, of whom you speak quite lowly, was a Warlord?" the empress asked jovially.

"See, that's my favorite part about it-- he said no. He says no, but then every single time he tries to defend his point, he fails. He even gives up and says yes, but then if you say it later, he tries to say no again! I don't understand it. He said he wasn't proud of it, but he even thought about hiding it when they were talking about it!"

"They were not good times for your people. From the sound of it, he did not want to be a Warlord. I personally am on his side of this-- if he does not call himself a Warlord, regardless of his role played, he was not one. I am surprised to hear this. Was his skill always so limited?"

Sunny groaned and swept into a huge circle. "I don't even-- he's not big with his jump, which a lot of Guardians consider to be an important thing. He really is terrible at anything except clearing gaps with a good run-up on flat terrain. But he's fine on the ground. And he can shoot really well, I didn't even know that, and really, he's not bad, it's just that his Ghost is a jerk and he can't be bothered to put up with it enough to shake off the rust and gather some momentum!"

Caiatl grunted. "This Rex. Does he believe Thomas qualified as a Warlord?"

"You know, I don't know," Sunny mused. "Thomas did say he misses those days. Rex didn't say anything himself, he was grouchy that whole trip. He's jealous of me and Freija, they both are, no one is being secretive about knowing. They can't help it, and really, we can't either. The weirdest stuff can bother them, and sometimes I get it but other times I'm just confused."

"Their bond is...?"

"I don't know if you mean bond like the love I mean or like the connection Freija talks about."

"If you will clarify, I will accept any answer."

Sunny wondered briefly if the thing that connected a Ghost and Guardian could be disrupted at all. "The love like I mean, they're... Not in a good place. Rex gets spiteful and apparently won't heal under certain circumstances, and I did know he had problems with his scanner bandwidth range, but I didn't realize how bad, so even the few times he does help, he's not as helpful as, say, I am, just because he can't. Which... If he's been trying to make Thomas make up for things he can't do.... It's rough. They make me feel lucky. They make me feel lucky when we're fighting. But as far as I can tell, they're just as much Ghost and Guardian as Freija and I are. He's actually a great fighter, he really is. It's a shame."

Caiatl "hmphed". Something in it sounded amused. "This is an interesting account. I would not have imagined that a Guardian and their Ghost would be so at odds. It seems counterintuitive."

"People are people," Sunny sighed. "Even an obligatory mutual symbiont. Rex started it, but I think he started it out of something pathetic instead of something mean. Thomas might have been mean back, back then. He's so kind, now. If a little resentful, I can smell that without olfactory sensors."

"How old are they? How long ago was this rift formed between them?"

Sunny wheeled. "I have no idea. Thomas had indicated that it was the library, which means the Tower's formation a couple hundred years ago, but the story he told made it sound earlier than that."

"I would like to witness this discordance," Caiatl chuckled.

"I don't," grumbled Sunny. "They make me feel bad. Sometimes even a little guilty for being friends with Freija in front of them. The look on Thomas's face when I gave Freija her backpack before she asked for it.... I feel bad for Thomas sometimes because I know Rex just can't, but there's lots he can and won't. It's just... Sad."

"And yet he, like any other, kept a band of mortals," she chuckled. "Out of a sense of obligation, as I understand it. Was this Rex supportive?"

"I got a real keen sense that he wasn't." Sunny turned to see Caiatl's tusks bobbing thoughtfully. "I don't know. I literally can't imagine what would make me act like that at Freija. I know he thought he could drive Thomas into being more than he is, but he was mean about it. We've all tried to help, but Rex is too angry about being wrong to correct his mistake. And he gets to see where my incessant cheering on has gotten Freija, someone he considered to be far lesser than Thomas as long as he could get away with it, and that just makes him so angry."

"You seem to simultaneously pity and dislike this Rex. And yet you call him friend?"

"I can love someone I don't like," Sunny said. "I wish I could help them. Freija wants to, too, but neither of us know what to do. Rex is angry and wants to be angry. Thomas is.... Just.... He's so kind, patient, he loves Rex, I think. Feels sorry for him, too. I don't know. They... It's so weird. And sad."

Caiatl chortled and heaved a long sigh. "Somehow, it is a relief to know that even bonds so deep do not guarantee harmony. They do work together?"

"Only in combat. It's one thing Rex can do well, and it's what he wants to do. Thomas is good at it, too, as long as what you need is cover fire. His threadlings will dissolve Vex almost as fast as his needles can unmake them, and once he's linked the needles into his gun, he can send that magic everywhere. But he's not tough. And he's real bad about getting caught out, I think it's him and Rex both being bad at spatial awareness. He has to stay in the back. Rex hates it."

"This Thomas has aligned strongly with the Darkness?" Now the amusement turned to real interest. "Do you suppose there is a link between their weak relationship and his ability to use the Darkness? Does the Ghost facilitate the Darkness the same as the Light?"

Sunny wagged a "no". "Guardians are paracausal-- outside causality, able to break the rules of physics and create matter or manipulate the intangible forces of the universe. So it allows for manipulation of Darkness. I think. I don't know for sure. But anyway-- no, I really don't. Rex likes the Darkness, too, he says. He could just be saying it for effect, but he says Stasis feels minty and strand feels like to swimming in warm water, and he likes both of them. It's been a big relief to them both. We thought it would help them, but they're stuck in their ways. Rex refuses to help Thomas do anything but fight, and Thomas doesn't like fighting. He hates getting shot, he hates dying, and he doesn't like working with anyone at the same time as needing backup." She rolled in the air and wheeled her petals. "That's one thing he is jealous about, Freija is so stupid and headstrong and he would love Thomas to be so combat-ready. Thomas would, too, I think."

Caiatl chewed on that one, too. "Do you think he would be happier with her? Or a Guardian like her?"

Sunny wagged another negative. "I think he'd hate her and anyone else like her. He doesn't know what he wants. If he had Freija, if he tried to tell her to do anything, she'd fight with him first. Anyone like her would do the same. He can't be nice, and Freija doesn't respond well to authority."

Caiatl rumbled another laugh. "She responds to real authority well enough. She knows Rex is not her superior."

Sunny wanted to argue but then she remembered Neomuna. Yeah, fair enough.

"Do you feel a Guardian like Thomas would relieve you of the guilt you suffer for raising a soldier?"

"Eternally bound to the fight," she sighed. She hadn't considered it. "I would ... Probably feel like Rex. Like I wasn't doing enough. I like to think I wouldn't scare my Guardian away from me. I... I don't know what's wrong with Rex."

"You feel he is ungrateful?"

"He had Thomas for five hundred years before I found her and he was disappointed from the first day because he didn't want to get shot. I feel like it's blasphemy to be disappointed in your Guardian like he is. Something about it should feel wrong to him, if you ask me. I think it might and that's what makes him feel like that."

Caiatl chortled. "Is there a grander belief that one can blaspheme?"

Sunny didn't even think about it when she said it. "I mean.... Some of us think we were all created with a purpose and a single Guardian out there to find. Some of us think we happened by accident, tiny fragments of the Traveler trying to save ourselves, and the connections to the Chosen are happenstance, or are something else magical. Some of us think that we were created to fight, or defend humans. It varies by who you ask."

"Your personal belief?"

Sunny paused to consider it. She hadn't rethought it in a while. "Well, I believe that... We were created unintentionally. I also believe that no individual holds the spark for an individual Ghost. We have our Chosens, but to think that we were all created a thousand years ago to look for people that wouldn't be born, let alone die, for centuries..... Bodies decay. To think that anyone could miss their chance just because the body rotted... To think that the Traveler created some Ghosts to die... I don't think it did. Really, I don't think it did just because there's too many of us. I think it broke and we're just dust that came off it. I think the bodies we're drawn to call us, but I don't think it's any single one-- I think more than one holds our spark. But maybe not at a time, or maybe it's spread out until I feed the one that grows, like the one seed of three planted."

Caiatl silently considered this for a time, gazing ahead. She then smirked. "I do not envy your position. I would suffer many doubts, more than you, I think."

"I... Honestly, I don't know. It all comes down to the fact that, if we don't fight, there will be nothing left to fight for. And I have Freija, and she wants to fight, so fight we will. Terrifying as that is."

"Your courage is seen," Caiatl promised.

"Your strength is, too, but remember that you have to rest," Sunny said, seeing the light fade in her eyes. "Do you sleep? You should probably sleep."

Her weight rocked back to her heels and her face plate shifted as her tusks lifted. Her eyelids still drooped. "We sleep. I will. I am glad to see you. I will entertain you, next time." Caiatl put a fist to her chest and bowed, an unusually stuffy gesture.

Sunny nudged the tip of her helmet. She was pretty sure it was the first time she touched the empress, even that little bit. Caiatl chuckled as she drew back to her full height.

"You must be tired, defaulting to formality like that," the Ghost observed. "See if Nimbus will hide you for an hour or so?"

"I will steal the sleep I can," she promised. "How is your Guardian?"

"Standing ground with fire and hammer," Sunny said. "It can be so beautiful, even amongst the horror."

"Her fires are indeed," agreed Caiatl. "I look forward to our next meeting. Farewell.

@wolvereaux. @annieruok94

#destiny 2 #d2 #ocs #writing #scribble #sunny #Caiatl

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merakiui · 2 days

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how do you manage to write for scaramouche so well?? ❤😭 it may be because i havent played genshin before. but. you srsly have me simping HARDCORE for this man, to the point that i wanna get in on the action too and write something of him for myself!!!- but as someone whose barely wrote before and struggles with dialogue sm, it feels impossibly difficult.. may i ask for some tips or advice abt this, if youre up for it ofc? and this is off topic but i also want to say that i enjoy reading every single writing of yours, and im very very thankful to you for even choosing to post them in the first place. reading something that you write will always make my day sm better and i appreciate you so much. im so sry this became so long rn, but i wish you a day as hardcorely wonderful as youve made me simp so hardcorely for scaramouche!!! (it was sounding better in myhead NOO. in all seriousness tho i wish you the best day ever possible, THANK YOU!!! you should be super duper proud of yourself for making these masterpieces and i srsly hope you are, even tho i know its hard to feel this way abt your own work!!!)

AAAAA this is so sweet... 🥺 thank you for enjoying my writings and the way I portray Scara!!!! (੭´͈ ᐜ `͈)੭♡ I'm glad you can love and simp for him!!!!!! He deserves many fans!!!! >3< and I'm grateful to know my works can make you happy!!! I wish you the most amazing, hardcorely wonderful day as well!!!!!! 💖💖

As for advice I'm not sure if it's advice for writing dialogue or Scara, but I can share my thoughts for both!!! :D dialogue is fun because, while it's still conversational, it can come in many forms depending on the context and dynamic/relationship between the characters. For example, dialogue between a boss and their secretary will be different from that of dialogue between close friends. Real-life conversations aren't perfect; we stutter, repeat words, trail off in what we're saying, ramble, interrupt, use fillers like "um" or "ah," and so on. Adding these elements into dialogue between characters can help it feel more natural.

With Scara, he has so many layers and can be written in many different ways depending on what era of him you're writing for. What I like most of all, though, is his ability to act so friendly. I feel as if this ability of his is somewhat forgotten, but in the Unreconciled Stars event he approached Traveler and company with such a friendly façade. Even his intonation was bright and kind (as opposed to how he later addresses the Fatui soldiers)!!!!! orz orz I adore this aspect of his character,, how he's able to be both a brilliant actor and an intimidating Harbinger all in one. His sharp, sarcastic tongue... the threatening aura he has despite being so short hehe. <3 there's so much to love!!

I like to imagine him as the stray cat they tell you not to feed often otherwise he'll continue to come around even when there isn't any food to give. Although it also helps that he's portrayed as a cat in Nahida's fairy tale. ;;; I love Scarameow with all of my heart!!!! It's also important to note that, as evil as he was during his era as a villain, there were also facets to him that showed some gap moe. How he cares for the elderly and children. How we know that he has a tendency to get attached to things, to seek a purpose, to know what it's like to be human and feel human, to be accepted and loved.

His misunderstanding with Ei also plays a role in how he views the world (and how he'd probably be wary in falling in love because he fears abandonment). Whereas Ei was hoping he could live his own life by setting him free rather than destroying him as Miko had wanted her to do, Scara mistook the gesture as abandonment and betrayal. And from his perspective it's hard to see the goodwill in what Ei did because she,,,, didn't exactly go about it in the best way. ^^;;;;

Aaaa there are just so many parts to consider from the timeline of his existence. As Wanderer, it's really heartwarming to see him gradually healing and accepting himself as well as letting go of past grievances (but also taking accountability for and acknowledging all that he did as well as all that he is). He still has that same sharp-tongued sarcasm and there are still rough edges, but he's not so harsh or vindictive. 🥺 I just adore him so much...

I rambled a lot and I'm sorry. T^T I hope it's helpful advice and not just my adoration for Scara shining through. ;;;;;

#sweet messages

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gracesshelves · 2 months

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The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)

The first time I watched anything related to The Lord of the Rings was last year when my friend made me watch the extended editions of the first three movies, so I was glad that I had some context while coming into The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012). However, I have not read any of the books, which I think made it harder to watch this movie in particular. I would rate this movie a two out of five, which is the lowest rating I’ve given in class so far. One of the most important things when consuming media is the ability to keep my focus. I’ve watched some really poorly made movies, but they kept my attention throughout the whole thing, something I cannot say for this movie. I sat and watched this whole thing and I cannot remember half of what happened because it dragged on for so long. Connecting to our discussion this week on the dangers of alienating potential fans through adaptation, I do think this movie kind of does this. If I’d read The Hobbit before, I would’ve been more invested, but since I had no context of where this was going, it was very hard to pay attention.

This movie follows Bilbo Baggins sixty years before the events of The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Despite his adventure-filled youth, Bilbo mellowed into adulthood and thought he was content to live the life of a simple hobbit. However, this illusion is shattered when Gandalf the Grey invites a bunch of dwarves to his house for dinner in an attempt to convince Bilbo to join their quest. Their goal is to reclaim the Kingdom of Erebor, which was captured by the dragon Smaug 171 years ago. Despite some pushback, Bilbo eventually agrees to join their group. In this film, we follow them on the first leg of their quest. Honestly, I think Martin Freeman was the perfect choice for this role. He’s kind of developed a type cast as the cautious, reluctant, sarcastic protagonist/sidekick, but he plays it so well. His personality got me through the lulls of action during this movie.

I promise I have some nice things to say! I really enjoyed the whole Rivendell scene because I got to see some characters I actually knew. I also think it did a nice job of establishing Gandalf's philosophy, which makes his choices of protagonists make so much more sense. My favorite scene in the whole movie was, of course, the scene with Gollum. This section had the most tension and highest stakes of the film, in my opinion. I was folding clothes while watching the majority of the movie, but I had to stop what I was doing during this part because I was so invested. Andy Serkis does an amazing job of making Gollum creepy, yet sympathetic. His performance always draws me in, and I think the movie would have suffered without the inclusion of this scene.

This week I don’t particularly have any comments on themes, because I have a hard time recalling what the plot was in general besides getting from point A to point B, but I did appreciate Gandalf’s whole speech about why he picked Bilbo specifically. He says: “Some believe it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. It is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love” (The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 2012). I think that is what stuck with me the most walking away from this movie. Will I finish the franchise? Probably not. I have a lot of diehard LOTR fans as friends, and they loathe this trilogy so I don’t feel the need to watch it, but I might consider reading the source material. Unfortunately, the studios kind of shot themselves in the foot with this one. I would’ve had the patience to sit through a four-hour-long movie if it covered the whole book. Making a trilogy out of a book that is shorter than any of the The Lord of the Rings books was not the best idea.

#my reviews

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peterstamatin · 4 months

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The Beginner’s Guide to The Void

(by caspiancomic)

The Void is my favourite game that I’ve never played.

Released in 2008 under the name Tension, it’s the second major release from Russian studio Ice-Pick Lodge, following 2005′s Pathologic. If you are familiar with this foreign indie art game, you are probably full to bursting already with indie gamer snob cred, but I implore you to help yourself to a bit more. If you’ve gone so far as to play it, you’ve got more snob cred than even I, so congratulations on that. For those of you interested in experiencing it, which will hopefully be all of you, it is available to PC users on Steam, but for the rest of you, I recommend CannibalK9′s spectacular Let’s Play.

Let me repay my debts right away. In this essay, I hope to open your eyes to some of the thematic through lines of The Void, encourage you to experience the game yourself, suggest that in the future you think more fully and deeply about the thematic core of your chosen games, and maybe expose you to a beautiful, little understood, and criminally under appreciated diamond of a video game. But if all I accomplished with this essay was CannibalK9 reading it and learning how much his LP affected my ability to read and appreciate games, media generally, and life, I would still consider it an unqualified success. CannibalK9 speaks beautifully, a trait I admire in others and seek to cultivate in myself, and he has a great deal of knowledge and wisdom regarding this game. Many if not all of my own ideas are indebted to his observations of and reflections on the game. If you know him, or are in contact with him, send him this way. I’d love a chance to thank him for everything he’s done for me.

And before we get down to it properly, one last thing. Ice-Pick Lodge is, at the time of writing, running a Kickstarter to fund their next game, called Knock-Knock. If you’re a fan of either The Void specifically, or atmospheric horror games generally, I’d highly recommend chucking them a few bucks. They’re only looking for a modest $30 000 to fund the game, and even a tiny donation gets you access to the finished game, so please do go check that out.

But enough sentiment for now, eh? Let’s get down to it.

Once, when asked what Neon Genesis Evangelion is about, I cherished the opportunity to glibly respond with “everything.” It’s an answer that only makes sense to those already familiar with the series, and as such, was completely unhelpful to the person who asked me. But I maintain that it’s true. On a textual level, of course, Evangelion is about children who pilot giant robots to fight against alien invaders. But thematically, Evangelion is about religion, death, parent/child relationships (and as an extension, God/creation relationships), sex, puberty, loneliness, identity, free will, science, and basically anything you care to name. The Void is similarly weighted with thematic theses. The primary difference is that even on a strictly textual level, The Void is borderline incomprehensible, particularly on a virgin playthrough.

Still, that’s all just stage setting. I’m here to provide as in-depth an analysis as I can manage for a couple of The Void’s thematic hearts. Like Evangelion, The Void has a lot to say, and it says it quietly and clearly. For the purposes of this essay, I will be examining The Void’s relationship with death and the afterlife, and feminism and patriarchy.

But first, crib notes! The Void is dense with information, and I’m going to be referring to characters and concepts by their names from now on. The section that follows is more comprehensive than a “Beginner’s Guide to The Void” probably should be, but nowhere near an all-encompassing overview of the game. Some of the elements of the game that are not of importance for the discussion to follow- like glyphs, the presence and role of predators, etc- have been excluded from this explanation to keep the focus tight and the length tolerable. Also, where multiple characters give conflicting information on a topic (which happens all the time in this game), I’ve either attempted to include all the information, or focus on whichever version of events ended up being most true.

It features what you might call spoilers, but in order to progress through this discussion it’s important that we all know the characters and terms I’m about to discuss. So if you’re hellbent on a blind playthrough (the best way to play, according to CannibalK9), go play the game and come back when you’re done, the essay will still be here. As for the rest of us, let’s dive on in.

How do you feel? Dizzy? Overwhelmed? Confused? Well, believe me, it only gets worse. This information is presented gradually, obliquely, and resentfully by multiple characters all whispering different lies and half-truths in your ear over the entire game. Detangling this particular Gordian Knot has taken a lot of careful examination and consideration of the game’s glut of information. Even so, I am 100% open to the idea that I have misinterpreted or otherwise misunderstood some element of the game and its mythology. Necessarily, any summary of the events of the game is going to involve some conjecture, a bit of artistic interpretation, and your own interpretation may differ from my own. This is as close as I could come to the “truth” about this game, but the beautiful thing about The Void is that finding your own truth amid the cacophony is one of the most satisfying facets of the story. If the above summary doesn’t mesh with your interpretation of the events of the game, I’d love to hear about it. Otherwise, definition of terms aside, we can now jump into an examination of the thematic undercurrents of the game.

The world of The Void is married to death. The first character you meet, the melancholic Nameless Sister, is called Sister Death by her siblings. Throughout your journey, when you are approaching death, it will be Sister Death who warns you. Towards the end of the game, Sister Death will also make the ultimate sacrifice: she rips out her final heart and surrenders the last of her Colour to you to aid you on your quest. This act of generosity deeply disturbs the Sisters and Brothers, and I don’t mind telling you it deeply disturbed me. The characters of the game were shocked because “giving” in this world is either impossible or taboo, depending on who you ask. I was shocked because I didn’t realize until her sacrifice how much I really cared for Sister Death, and how much she obviously cared for me.

But for all Sister Death does to keep you alive, it is implied from the very beginning that our character is dead already. The Sisters, or at least Sister Death seem to believe you fell into the Void from above, while the Brothers insist you came up from below. Brother Triumphator insists that the Guest is “not alive, he’s quite dead.” In any case, Master Colour makes it perfectly clear (if his word can really be taken on the subject) that the only way to travel between Limits is to die. In the final leg of the game, Master Colour will also tell you that you are the soul of the Void- that you are the reason the Void is dead. Should that be true, you would be the wandering spirit of the well and truly deceased Sleeper, and therefor quite dead indeed. No matter how you cut it, the Guest is almost certainly dead, as the accounts of the various factions of the game only disagree in this respect on where you came from.

In spite of your posthumous nature, the threat of death still looms large over The Void. The sprigs of Colour you harvest to survive will periodically tell you that “there is no death in the Void.” This is, of course, patently untrue. Sister Death warns you early that beneath the Void is the Nightmare, the realm of Absolute Death. Should your hearts empty, you will sink into the Nightmare. In addition to this, Brothers can be killed in combat, and Sisters can be cannibalized with Aya’s Vampire glyph. At the end of the game, you will allow a Sister ascend, and if Colour is to be believed, travelling up to a new Limit requires death in the current one. As if that wasn’t enough, it’s made unambiguously clear that one Sister will ascend to the detriment of her siblings: everybody but the selected Sister, including the player character, must die for her to reach Breakthrough.

When we examine these elements of The Void’s mythology, then, we can reach a conclusion about its thesis regarding not only the afterlife, but life. Let’s sum up. In The Void, reality is described as being like a chain of Limits, one above the other, travelling up infinitely high, but with a definite bottom in the Nightmare. Travelling between Limits is only possible upon death, and the deceased will either travel down, or with a great deal of effort and sacrifice, up. The Brothers, nightmarish creatures themselves who believe yourself to be one of them, and believe you ascended to the Void from the Nightmare, refer to the Void as Paradise. The Sisters, beautiful human women in appearance, aspire either secretly or obviously to reach Breakthrough and ascend. Sister Ole and Sister Yani, the uppermost Sisters in the Void, occupy chambers almost uncannily similar to the Limit above, and Sister Yani even claims she has been there. From these elements we can draw the conclusion that afterlife and life are, essentially, one and the same.

What we perceive as the world of the living is merely our own Limit, and upon death our spirit will either sink into the Limit below, which we will perceive as either a purgatory like the Void or a kind of hell like the Nightmare, or we will travel up, to what we might call Paradise. The Void suggests that there is no after life: only life.

There is, however, an interesting caveat to that unique interpretation of the after life. The chain of Limits has a bottom, the Nightmare, which we could call Hell, but it is infinitely tall. The Brothers (who, it is my belief, ascended to the Void from the Nightmare) refer to the Void as Paradise, in spite of the fact that to our eyes it is miserably bleak. From this we can infer that the Limit above our own would be perceived as a Paradise. In fact, ascending a Sister with the Rite of Devotio is said to create a world “for” or “from” that Sister- a world both created from and perfectly suiting the ascended soul. This is all evidence that the Limit above our own is equivalent to the concept of Heaven. But, the chain of Limits is infinitely tall- meaning that “Paradise” is, essentially, relative.

In a couple of ways this is sort of depressing. First, it implies that something approximating “perfection” can never be achieved. Sister Aya refers to Breakthrough as “creating a life from mere existence”, but no matter how high you manage to ascend, you will never reach a sort of “Absolute Life” to counterbalance the Nightmare’s Absolute Death. The second way this chain of Limits can be interpreted negatively is the implication that there is a Hell, but no Heaven. The Nightmare is a very real and definitive dead end on the chain of Limits, but no such finish line exists at the top of the chain. This means traditional western concepts of Heaven- perfect happiness, tranquility, peace, and togetherness with God- simply do not exist in the world of The Void.

And yet in spite of this, I personally can’t help but interpret this positively. Consider it a facet of my- to borrow a phrase from CannibalK9- “gratingly optimistic” personality. For a start, as an atheist the idea of Heaven isn’t compatible with my belief system. But more than that, the idea of a final resting place in which souls spend the rest of time in perfect harmonious bliss is not in keeping with the tone of The Void. The Void is about struggle- tension, if you like- and it values hard work and dedication above all things. The idea of struggling your entire life to make the world around you a better place, and being rewarded with a higher Limit to work your craft on, is much more appealing to me than a kind of winner’s circle in which spirits congratulate themselves for the rest of eternity.

In his Let’s Play, CannibalK9 makes an inspired comparison between the infinitely tall chain of Limits and creative pursuits: you can always improve, but never perfect, your given craft. Perfection is dull. Everything interesting in life comes from tension, from learning, practicing, struggling, trying, failing, and succeeding. Why should the after life sanitize the most rewarding elements of life? In the cosmogony of The Void, there is no resting on laurels, no pats on the back, and no air of self congratulation. The end of every life represents a new opportunity to improve yourself and the world around you. How often have you looked back at your own life in abject embarrassment, wishing you knew then what you know now? Have you ever looked at something you wrote or drew several years ago and been repulsed by your own inexperience? Are you haunted by the time you were cruel or inconsiderate to someone who trusted you? Did reckless mistakes you made when you were younger have a disproportionately strong effect on the course your life took? In The Void, the end of every life represents an opportunity to approach the whole ordeal again with more and better wisdom, inspiration, trust, intelligence, and kindness. Consider it a New Game Plus mode for life. How many people here would prefer that option to an eternity spent strumming on a harp?

You might think it’s strange that a game in which a host of powerful male characters protect and repress a sorority of helpless little girls could be considered feminist. Is it possible for a game in which women are literally bound, have no power except their beauty, and depend on a male spirit for sustenance, could have a healthy and sympathetic tone for women? What are we to think of a game in which the only female characters are forced to provocatively pose and strip in exchange for the substance they need to live, like a gentleman’s club where the dancers beg for food stamps? Well, it’s my opinion that this game has deep, strong feminist themes in its very DNA.

When feminism and video games enter the same conversation, more often than not attention is drawn to female characters with strength and conviction. Well, no, when feminism and video games mix more often the result is entitled children throwing their toys out of the crib and making fools of themselves. But in the more civilized corners of the internet (they do exist), great attention is payed to Lara Croft, Jade, Samus- the girls who kick ass and take names. And rightly so- a woman who can accomplish any task a man can and doesn’t make a big thing out of it is commendable progress in an industry that is overwhelmingly male-dominated.

However, while these characters and games are great examples of feminist game icons, I think they all fall into the same category: feminist power fantasies. There’s nothing wrong with a good feminist power fantasy, of course, but it’s only a single facet of what could be a much larger jewel. The Void has a more subtle, more literary feminist streak. It’s my belief that The Void can be very satisfyingly read as an allegory for modern feminism- a woman’s eye view of life amidst the patriarchy.

The Void’s gender politics are extremely obvious, and impossible to ignore. The Brothers and the Sisters have gendered names even as factions. They are totally segregated by gender, and the Brothers are the exclusive wielders of all the power there is to be had in the Void. With the exceptions of Echo and Aya, the sisters are prisoners in their chambers, each one both guarded and dominated by their respective Brother. Even those ostensibly “liberated” sisters are only free to move about the Void at the behest of the Brothers. In other words, the women in this game are utterly repressed by the men. This isn’t a coincidence- the singularly male ruling class keeping the female population in their place is a literal manifestation of the concept of the patriarchy, silently handicapping women to benefit a small ruling class exclusively composed of men.

Although women in video games being attractive by traditional standards is nothing new, the way the Sisters’ loveliness contrasts with the monstrousness of the Brothers is significant. Divorced from its here strictly physical manifestation, The Void seems to suggest in this way that all women are beautiful (intelligent, courageous, selfless, inquisitive, creative, etc) while all men are ugly (vain, egocentric, hypocritical, self-righteous, pompous, and so forth). This is an extremely strong stance to take, and contrary to the opinions of many a Youtube comments section feminists do not believe that women are superior to men, and certainly not to the degree seemingly hypothesized by The Void. But, The Void does not strive to create an allegory representative of the real world, remember. The Void represents the patriarchy as viewed through the lens of its female victims.

As long as we keep this in mind, the loveliness of the Sisters and the striking grotesqueness of the Brothers will make more thematic sense. Through this lens, many of the character decisions made by Ice-Pick Lodge will come into focus. For example, the fact that the Brothers consider themselves the infallible champions of the Sisters, or that the Brothers consider the Sisters somehow dangerous or threatening, or even that the Sisters resent rather than fear their Brothers. Using this interpretation we can also make sense of the seemingly problematic concept of the Sisters being unable to free themselves: one of the core tenets of a functioning patriarchy is that it is a system in which women are powerless, subservient, and subordinate. If the Sisters were capable of fighting the Brothers themselves, The Void would cross over into the above mentioned “feminist power fantasy”, and would not be representative of a “pure” patriarchy. In order to represent an airtight allegorical representation of the patriarchy, the female characters are necessarily powerless.

There are two factions still to incorporate into this formula, though: Colour, and the Guest. Colour is certainly a masculine presence, and Colour in The Void is representative of power. The patriarchy is so entrenched in the Void that the very voice of “power” is male, and what’s more, power itself desires to remain exclusively in the hands of men. In the final leg of the game, Colour begins speaking to Golden Eyes constantly and aggressively. Although Colour introduces the player to the concept of Breakthrough, and teaches you that this rite ought to be performed on a Sister, as the game progresses Colour at first suggests, and then demands with increasing annoyance, that Golden Eyes perform the Rite of Devotio on himself. It is never suggested that a Brother could achieve Breakthrough- although they are explicitly referred to as being able to “take”, they consider Nerva to be poisonous- so Colour’s only option for keeping power in male hands is to ascend through his male vessel, the Spirit.

The final piece in this particular puzzle is the Guest. The Guest is by all accounts outwardly male. He has a masculine body when you view his hearts, and he spends much of the game successfully disguising himself as a Brother. However, the Guest lacks many of the qualities The Void associates with masculinity. He doesn’t speak, which contrasts him with the Brothers and their interminable self-righteous tirades. He also, strikingly, lacks genitals. Don’t dismiss this as censorship or authorial restraint either: any one of the Sisters will stand as naked as a newborn should you unlock all her hearts, and all their sex organs are clearly visible. In these ways The Void differentiates between a character who is a pillar of the oppressive patriarchy- the Brothers and Colour- and a character who is simply male.

But why is the Spirit male at all? The suggestion to me seems to be that overthrowing the patriarchy and creating a society in which women are truly considered equal to men is the responsibility of everybody, including men. In the Void, Colour is power. In a power-unbalanced society, evening the odds requires the empowered party to sacrifice power to the powerless party. The relationship between the Guest and the Sisters is collaborative- it represents men willingly and happily draining their own privilege and power and offering it to women. With this interpretation, it makes one male character offering power to women under the disapproving gaze of ten empowered men that much more significant: according to The Void, the power equalization between men and women is going to come slowly, from a dedicated minority of male feminist allies, and is going to be met with outrage and violence from the vast majority of men.

This makes Master Colour’s description of the barriers between Limits as a “glass ceiling” much more meaningful. By willfully surrendering his own power to a woman, against the wishes of the ruling patriarchy, the Spirit allows a Sister to literally break the so-called glass ceiling, and ascend to a position above that of even the Brothers. Now that we accept that it is the responsibility of men and women both to overthrow the patriarchy, we can make more sense of the Spirit’s systematic elimination of the Brothers. The Void’s contention is that for women to truly ascend, feminist men need to not only empower women, but actively destroy the patriarchal elements in their society and themselves. The Guest- the male feminist- literally destroys the patriarchy in his quest to empower a Sister.

Finally, the ultimate goal of The Void is coloured, if you will, with feminist (or at the very least, feminine) themes. The Rite of Devotio will allow one Sister to ascend to the Upper Limit- creating life from mere existence. This is tantamount to a kind of birth. If the Upper Limit is where true “life” occurs, then the Void is not only an afterlife, but prelife. You could call the Void a kind of womb, in which there exists the possibility for many different lives, but only one can be chosen. Even the concept of the Void- vacant, hollow, accepting- is symbolically vaginal. The layout and design of the Void even echoes the appearance of a uterus, fallopian tubes, and ovaries. The Sisters in their chambers could be said to be unfertilized eggs. In this analogy, then, Colour becomes seminal. It’s the substance used to fertilize a Sister so that she can ascend to the Upper Limit to be born. After all, in order to perform Breakthrough, the Spirit must reach a state of Turgor- turgidity, the opposite of flaccidity, being the state of tissue that has become rigid with the absorption of fluid. In other words, for humans, an erection. In this light, try not to think too hard about the fact that the oldest Sister is nineteen.

Well, that represents just about the sum total of my most concrete theories regarding The Void. The Void is a spectacularly nourishing experience, and I had to trim away several potential avenues of thematic exploration to save on space and time. In the future, I may return to The Void, and use it as a jumping board to discuss art, love (platonic, familial, romantic, sexual, it’s all there in some form or another, and every player will have a different reaction to every Sister), religion, truth and lies, how we define ourselves against those around us… essentially any topic you care to mention can be meaningfully addressed using the language of The Void. For today, though, I hope I’ve managed to enrich your understanding of this and all games, the way CannibalK9 nourished my own understanding of this and all games. Once again, I’d like to implore you to check out Ice-Pick Lodge’s Kickstarter, and for any PC users, don’t forget that The Void is available on Steam. If you good folks have something to add about The Void (and anybody who has experienced it must have something to say about it), whether you’re building on or tearing down something I’ve said above or you’d like to pursue your own avenue of thought, please feel free to drop a comment, or even contact me personally. I could discuss this game to the end of time, so it certainly wouldn’t be an imposition.

#the void #тургор #turgor

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aces-and-kings · 9 months

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🖍️ CRAYON - what advice would you give to them? (All, because this seems like a fun thought exercise. :P)

[Brutal. Bru. tal. But indeed, fun. Let's do it! Under the cut due to length.]

. Thor: He is not the only man you're ever going to love. I know it hurts. I know you feel like you're not worth loving, that every time you try and do the right thing, that things start looking up for you, something goes wrong. You've taken more than any of my other oc and you're tired. Believe me, I get it, but it will get better. You will meet someone again someday and things will work out like they're supposed to. Hang in there buddy. And maaaybe if you want or something idk, cut back on the smoking. Just a suggestion.

. Seven: You can keep running. You can keep fucking up knowing that you're destroying everything good in your life every time it appears. You can keep feeling like a monster if that's what you like. Who am I to stop you, right? But, here's something to consider. You could... do some good with your abilities? Atone for the wrong you've done. I get that you feel beyond saving but you're not. Telling you to just stop doing bad won't help though, so just food for thought. One day someone is going to wake you up and I'd hate to be the skeletons in your closet the day you open that door, but you'll be alright.

. Alex: Welcome to the life of 90% of role-players cupcake. We read the grand adventures, we don't often go on them. Certainly not like in your world. Listen though, your bookshop is really important. You give people a place to rest, a place free of the outside world's chaos and for those, like you, like me, who can't go on some dragon slaying, saving, what have you grand journey, you provide the doorway to such experiences through books. So keep smiling, ay? You never know who's looking and just might find it captivating.

. Nikolai: I don't even know where to start with you buttercup. That's a dangerous game you're playing, putting all your eggs into someone else's basket. I mean I won't judge, because I get it. People can grow attached to pets, friends, partners etc. but if you don't find something of yourself to love and enjoy apart from your obsession with Sindri, a lot of shit out of your control is going to affect you negatively. Also you need to let that guy you're not into go. It's not right to string someone along just cause you'd rather avoid hurting their feelings. In doing that you're still hurting someone, it'll just be Sindri instead.

. Ravka: It's okay to just be yourself. For all the tranquility and self-discipline, for all the kindness and courageousness that makes up who you are, you are awfully ashamed of being Hrothgar. Yes, it does make you vastly different, and you probably feel caught between the world of beast and man. I can imagine how that leaves you feeling alone, and I'm sorry for that. At the end of the day though, you are who you are buddy. And that's going to be enough for the right people, or it isn't and they aren't.

. Grey: Hi, big fan. You amuse me a lot more than I let on to people. Unsolicited advice though? Stop hiding. You're Garlean, so what? A lot of people are. Your family had a history of raining horror down upon other nations, but you never willingly walked that path. You did what you felt you had to. That's called surviving my dude and you're forgiven for it. Perhaps not by all, but by me if no one else. You do not have to flash gil and lavish luxuries on people to be appreciated. And Seven is a horrible option for additional help but good job asking for some! I apologize Thor is being such a... Thor right now. Good luck and p.s. maybe grow the hair back out. I know you're digging this whole Red vibe atm, you want to honor him, I get it. Do you. Just a suggestion.

Thanks @hydaelyns-bitch, this was... cathartic and odd but indeed fun. lol

#asks #thorstyr helbwilfsyn #greyson evandrus #ravka kirigan #nikolai cross #alexander hawthorne #seven sato #4th wall break

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