#but also my fault :)

[guu]

wen u get ur next injection this guy kills and murders ur estrogen

#not me tho ive been off T for like two weeks now RIP #my endo banished me #and its been a pain in the ASS tryin to get them to call me back #so i can figure out how to get back in with him #when it was bc they didnt fuckin. check me in the day of my appt #when i was gotdamg there #but also my fault #cause i waited at least a week to call back #anxiety nerf

[spooksier]

me when the emotionally repressed character is revealed to have had something happen in their childhood that was completely out of their control but changed them in a way they can never come back from

#text! #did post this on twt but this belongs on the crying about characters website #and yeah this is about jarchivist and also marc spector in the mk show #idk it hit me yesterday that they were EIGHT AND NINE!!!!!!! when their respective thing happened and that ruined me #like it wasn't their fault but they think it is!!! GOD!!!!!!!!!! #holds those autistic bi men close to my chest #should've never smoked that shit* (*took my brother to a cave/read that book) #now im irrevocably changed* (*tied to the shittest god possible/destined to be the antichrist) #edit: this is getting a bit of traction so pls know that blorbo tagging and oc tagging is SOOO encouraged #thank you to the person who added the flaming text miles edgeworth thats so funny

[makanidotdot]

i was made aware a warcraft version of this meme didn't exist

#comic by illidan's alpha male podcast #warcraft #illidan #tyrande #malfurion #human resources meme #also they are not cool at all they are all dumb #one of my friends is reading wota its their fault

[inkskinned]

yesterday while feverish i wrote about how boats can moor next to each other like pigeons, cooing with the gentle rap of water against their hull. you once said that that the way i see things - birds in the water, feathers in marina paint - was "childish and naive." you said i'd been misdiagnosed - "it can't all be adhd. you might be just kind of stupid and lazy."

i still do certain things like how you taught me - turn the pillow case inside out before putting it on. drive defensively. hate myself entirely.

the prompt for this poem is "mahler's fifth." i wish it wasn't, but mahler's fifth was our song. it ended up in my book. every person that knows your name has promised me they'll give you one swift rabbit punch, right to the face. dean read the book and showed up on my front porch, drenched in sweat from running the 8 miles at 4 in the morning. he was shaking. pacifist and gentle - he works with children - i'd never seen him furious. a punch isn't going to do it, he said, and then said i'm sorry. i had to come to see if you were okay.

mahler's fifth was mine first, like my girlhood. i like the way each movement piles onto the next movement, each instrument bleeding into the next. i like the horn version the best. before i met you, i danced to it on grass still-wet from sprinklers.

later you would tell me that the way you heard it was somehow better. you understood something in it that i couldn't quite wrap my fingers into. once, on our anniversary, you asked the classical music radio station to play it for us. we missed hearing it because we were fighting. one of the things people get wrong about abuse is that sometimes victims are, like, brutally aware of the stupidity of our situation. what do you mean that you thought i wasn't good enough for you? you? you're just... nothing.

sometimes people can pull the poetry out of your life. i watched my words become clothesline, and then thin out into kite twine. i watched you chew through every good syllable of me. so many good songs and places and moments were ruined. i am glad you didn't like most of my music - less to tie back to you.

but still mahler's fifth. the music swells, and i am 21 and throwing up in a bathroom on my birthday. a woman i will later refer to as lesbian jesus runs a cool hand down my back, her perfect pantsuit starch-pressed. she told me to leave you. she said - and this is true, and not an invention of rhyme or fantasy - i'm you from the future.

i am 22, and i got home from an award ceremony, and i remember you telling me - you act so proud of yourself when you're actually so fucking embarrassing. i took you to disney world. you took my virginity. i gave up visiting spain for a week with my family - i instead choose you, to spend the time just-cuddling. you called it "our fuck week." the music swells. it probably should have been a red flag that for about 3 years - i just gave up on crying. my grandfather died and you said nothing. my uncle died and you ghosted me for 3 weeks. you said i need to protect myself from your ongoing tragedy.

every so often i come back to the memory of one of our last afternoons in person. i had just told you that i wasn't going to law school, despite the free ride - i was going to join a creative writing program. master's in fine arts. i was going to finally do it - i was going to follow my dreams. this blog was already internet-famous. however reluctantly, i would occasionally refer to myself as a poet. i got into umass amherst's writing program for fiction authors. it is one of the the top 5 programs in the country.

wait are you seriously considering actually attending that? dumbfounded, you turned completely towards me in your seat. for the 3rd time in our relationship, you almost crashed the car. you actually want to be a writer?

the first time i went viral, it was for a poem i wrote about you:

he wants to say i love you but keeps it to goodnight because love will take some falling and she's afraid of heights.

every time i see that, i want to throw up. you weren't in love with me, you were in love with the control you had over me. a little truth though: i am afraid of heights. you caught a rabbitgirl and skinned her alive.

mahler's fifth still makes me sick.

give me that back. give me back music. give me back everything i had before you. give me back fearlessness. give me back bravery. give me back a scarless body.

give me back what you took from me.

#nosebleed club #sorry stephen not ur fault #just like. thinking #writeblr #spilled ink #warm up #every time nat is like - oh let me get that for u #im like .... this is a trick right like ur gonna be mean now bc u did something nice rn #so obviously if ur being nice now either u did something mean and im about to learn about it #or you're going to BE mean #or ur gonna hold this over my head forever and i'll never get a nice thing ever again? #and every time nat is like .... babe i just actually like u #lesbian jesus story is 100% real btw. she also told me not to be an event planner #literally changed the shape of my life

[twinstxrs]

so much happened in this whole episode but i’m still on fig infiltrating ruben’s dream, making it look like the place where his friend was murdered, and then disguising herself as kipperlilly & repeatedly saying different variants of “somebody needs to take the fall for this, and it’s not going to be me. it’s going to be you.” while adaine as the elven oracle shows up next to her. can you imagine waking up from that, the idea of a horrible truth being pinned on you by your friend to save her own skin while the personification of fate and destiny stands there, almost as a promise that this is GOING to happen to you. we don’t even know if this kid is guilty. my god.

#fantasy high #dimension 20 #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #fantasy high junior year #fig faeth #ruben hopclap #lucy frostblade #the rat grinders #adaine abernant #kipperlilly copperkettle #watching fig terrorize him like girl!!! we don’t even know if he’s guilty!!!! #this might just be for me but i do not think 5 teenagers willingly brutally killed their friend idk #like there just has to be some other element to it and i am very scared to find out what that was #what if they were put in a position where they felt there was/there was no other choice… like oh my god #my comedy brain is having fun but my ‘this is a teenager’ brain is in such deep distress all the time this season #the rat grinders i trust brennan to not make u cartoonishly evil so i am holding u as gently as i can in my confused shaky hands #also with the devil’s nectar i’ve been wondering why they all seem so well-adjusted & now i’m curious if they’ve been intentionally- #changing their memories in a way so that either the trauma is lesser or they think they aren’t guilty. idk #but it seems like from how gertie was talking she was making it more recently so the well adjustedness from early jy doesn’t quite add up #they could have another source maybe??? idk i’m just low stakes 4 a.m. spitballing here #there’s also the strong possibility that they’re aware of what happened but they weren’t the ones who killed lucy. idk who knows #the way you could probably devil’s nectar yourself into believing it wasn’t your fault someone died… CRAZY IMPLICATIONS!!! CRAZY IDEA!!! #anyways the bad kids & the rat grinders don’t ever have to like each other but i do wonder if at least some of those kids deserve a chance

[bixels]

I think 90% of my gripes with how modern anime looks comes down to flat color design/palettes.

Non-cohesive, washed-out color palettes can destroy lineart quality. I see this all the time when comparing an anime's lineart/layout to its colored/post-processed final product and it's heartbreaking. Compare this pre-color vs. final frame from Dungeon Meshi's OP.

So much sharpness and detail and weight gets washed out and flattened by 'meh' color design. I LOVE the flow and thickness and shadows in the fabrics on the left. The white against pastel really brings it out. Check out all the detail in their hair, the highlights in Rin's, the different hues to denote hair color, the blue tint in the clothes' shadows, and how all of that just gets... lost. It works, but it's not particularly good and does a disservice to the line-artist.

I'm using Dungeon Meshi as an example not because it's bad, I'm just especially disappointed because this is Studio Trigger we're talking about. The character animation is fantastic, but the color design is usually much more exciting. We're not seeing Trigger at their full potential, so I'm focusing on them.

Here's a very quick and messy color correct. Not meant to be taken seriously, just to provide comparison to see why colors can feel "washed out." Top is edit, bottom is original.

You can really see how desaturated and "white fluorescent lighting" the original color palettes are.

[Remember: the easiest way to make your colors more lively is to choose a warm or cool tint. From there, you can play around with bringing out complementary colors for a cohesive palette (I warmed Marcille's skintone and hair but made sure to bring out her deep blue clothes). Avoid using too many blend mode layers; hand-picking colors will really help you build your innate color sense and find a color style. Try using saturated colors in unexpected places! If you're coloring a night scene, try using deep blues or greens or magentas. You see these deep colors used all the time in older anime because they couldn't rely on a lightness scale to make colors darker, they had to use darker paints with specific hues. Don't overthink it, simpler is better!]

#not art #dungeon meshi #rant #i'm someone who can get obsessive over colors in my own art #will stare at the screen adjusting hues/saturation for hours #luckily i've gotten faster at color picking #but yeah modern anime's color design is saddening to me. the general trend leans towards white/grey desaturated palettes #simply because they're easier to pick digitally #this is not the colorists fault mind you. the anime industry's problems are also labor problems. artists are severely underpaid #and overworked. colorists literally aren't paid enough to do their best #there isn't a “creative drought” in the anime industry. this trend is widespread across studios purely BECAUSE it's not up to individuals #until work conditions improve anime will unfortunately continue to miss its fullest potential visually #don't even GET ME STARTED ON THE USE OF POST-PROCESSING FILTERS AND LIGHTING IN ANIME THOUGH #SOMEONE HOLD ME BACK. I HATE LENS FLARES I HATE GRADIENT SHADING I HATE CHROMATIC ABBERATION AND BLUR

[cappycodeart]

CONCEPT DOODLES for an AU I dabbled in with a few friends after the winter king episode but kinda forgot about after the Fionna and Cake finale... I decided to revisit it and explore a little more after coming to terms with everything LOL... So, it's another "Winter King doesn't die immediately after his crown gets nuked" AU, but THIS TIME he's just dying really slowly (like Simon in the Betty episode) and ALSO joins Fionna, Cake, and Simon on their search for magic crowns. There's no logic behind this tbh, we just wanted to put him through The Horrors. And make them all friends. But mostly The Horrors. :) (he only gets to live as a treat, because I think he's funny).

Bonus (old screenshot), because this is still funny to me:

#adventure time #atimers #fionna and cake #winter king #simon petrikov #fionna campbell #cake the cat #shared custody au #winter stowaway au #fan art #digital art #flat color #2023 #this is my blog so whatevers man... ima just post what I want now... and what I want rn is silly simon AUs LOL... #so expect more of me releasing my stash tomorrow #this AU makes the story like 500x more messy but it's fine it's funny that's the point don't think too hard about it #this is their fault for killing him now I gotta make up scenarios where he is alive #his design is inspired by some doodles my friend crayon did #ALSO I wanted to keep some of his features different from default simon so they're easier to tell apart... #like YEAH they're the same character... but also I just think it'd be fun... if they had subtle differences... because alternate universes #ALSO HE'S PALE BECAUSE HE'S DYING. JUST MAKING THAT DISCLAIMER... HIS SKIN TONE IS KINDA CLOSE TO DYING SIMON IN THE BETTY EP #BUT IN NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCES HE'D BE CLOSER TO SIMON'S COLORS

[sinnabee]

listen i know;; i KNOW its mermay. but im thinking about him. anyway @bamsara throws this at you like a knife

#fnaf sb #solar lunacy #fnaf moon #fnaf y/n #fnaf fanart #listen #i love him ur honor #i just! ouuuOOUUAAAAHG #bam this is ur fault for updating anyway #now im just thinking about him #this is not OF the scene but im ALSO thinking about the hug on the wire;;; #bites into your arm and doesnt let go <3 #funky little jester boys #my art

[reegis]

The Oracle will see you now 🔮✨

#the mechanisms #ulysses dies at dawn #udad #drumbot brian #oracle brian my beloved… #im so normal about him (lying) #i dont normally post art of scantily clad men dont look at m e #my art #also im on my last commission!! maybe its my fault for accepting more than 6 ahah a.. oops… but so close!

[starcatching]

ATEEZ - 'NOT OKAY' MV (2024)

#ateez #atzsource #ateezedit #kpopco #kpopccc #ultkpopnetwork #dailybg #malegroupsnet #ateezgif #hongjoong #seonghwa #yunho #yeosang #san #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #myedit #what do they put into the instrumentals in their japanese tracks fr... #also you would not believe..but the grain is not my fault here this time ajfnsk

[itsdefinitely]

this is how richie's death went in my head

#i cant tell you how many times i had to go back and tweak wiggly because he has such a complicated design #like i was ready to post and then i realized i forgot his little arm stripes #but i persist #i do not persist enough to do lineart #but its fiiiiiiiiinnneeee its fiiiiiiiinnnneeeeeee #also yes this completely self-indulgent but in my defense none of my friends stopped me #i didnt tell them i was making this but its still their fault #nerdy prudes must die #npmd spoilers #wiggog y'rath #nibblenephim #pokotho #richard lipschitz #definitely art #id in alt text #if its out of character nnnnnnooooooooooo nnnnooooo its not shhhhhhhhhh

[lamentfulwarbler]

“Dazai is the big spoon!” “No, Chuuya is!” NO YOU’RE BOTH WRONG! SKK CUDDLE LIKE THIS:

#IGNORE HOW THE OTHER BED LINE IS MISSING #OR PILLOW #IDK HOW BEDS MADE FOR MORE THAN ONE PERSON WORK. OKAY? OKAY 👍 #ALSO THE BLANKET/DUVET FALLING OFF THE BED WAS ON PURPOSE THOSE MFS DON’T BLANKET HOG. THEY EJECT THAT THING OFF THE BED #i made this in like 5 mins or less. ignore any fault anatomy- #faulty anatomy* #chuuya position inspired by mayoi. dazai is just. how i sleep with my teddy i think 💀 #LISTEN IT WASN’T INTENTIONAL #I LITERALLY JUST REALISED #anyways peace and love we’re all correct #everyone can be a big spoon here 🙏 #aorry for my handwriting. its always been like 5hat i don’ have an excuse- #bsd #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #soukoku #skk

[forbiddenseason]

More about Loser Baby but about the moment where Angel calls himself a “coked up dick sucking ho”

He calls himself that to demean himself. Many other characters (antagonists usually) use the same kinds of words to demean Angel and imply he isn’t worthwhile.

But Husk says “baby, that’s fine by me.”

And it makes Angel smile, it’s what really cheers him up.

The entire song is about having value as a person despite where you are in life.

#it’s time to lose your self loathing excuse yourself let hope in baby!!! #there’s actually many different parts of the song I could talk about #like also #the first step to being better is to stop digging the hole #and it’s so fucking hard to stop digging #and also just like. shit just fucking happens!!!! people end up in bad places and they DESERVE respect as human beings #even if it’s their fault #that’s what my other post was about #huskerdust #hazbin hotel #Angel dust #husk #thots4thoughts

[babykittenteach]

🌔

#ofmd #our flag means death #suggestive #ed teach #stede bonnet #do i have a predictable type and interest? oh definitely #have I basically drawn this theme before? might as well've #but when my mind is allowed to roam where is will it tends to come back to ed vulnerable in low light #drawn on a voice call after I finished my dtiys submission for the raac fan video #the theme i chose for that piece is also one I have pursued before and will pursue again because it's not my fault they put him in a catbel #anyway you should go submit a coloring for the renew as a crew video if you haven't #art i'm proud of

[mikaikaika]

Fuck being doomed by the narrative, my otp is doomed by the dyslexia o7

#qsmp #tubbo #Fred #Frubbo #LET ME ALSO STATE I DON'T THIS IT WAS THE DYSLEXIA #THERE IS AMBIGUITY IN THE LANGUAGE AND IT WAS NOT ALL TUBBO'S FAULT OR THE ADMINS #IT'S THE FAULT OF ENGLISH MY BEHATED

[98chao]

great hearing you got there mr six eared macaque

#s4 finale prediction except i hope it doesnt happen #mk looks at them for one second and suddenly all of their weird (gay) tension makes sense #also i think wukong is a master in stealth only when it comes to sneaking up on macaque #lmk s4 spoilers #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk #six eared macaque #liu er mihou #lmk mk #qi xiaotian #sun wukong #monkey king #shadowpeach #me after posting nothing but shadowpeach for like a month straight #not my fault they make me feel feelings #my art #comic #ms paint #1k #2k #3k #4k #2023