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ao3commentoftheday · 6 months

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managing creative envy

Just like in other areas of our lives, it's easy to be jealous of others when we create in fandom spaces and post online - the online aspect of fandom just offers more opportunities for it. Hits, kudos, comments, reblogs. Whatever unit of measurement you look at, there's always some number out there ready to tell you who's "better" and who's "worse" at whatever creative endeavor you engage in.

Except that none of those numbers actually gauge skill or quality.

When we're jealous of those numbers, what we actually wish we had isn't bigger numbers, it's attention. Reassurance. Excitement. Community. Whether the number is 5 or 5000, that's what it represents. We want those things and that other person has more of them, and so we end up jealous.

To manage that jealousy, we need to understand what we need and then find ways to get it. It might not come from posting on AO3, but maybe it comes from a local writer's group. Maybe there's someone in your life that you wish cared a little more about your "silly stories" and took you more seriously when you spoke about writing. Maybe what's missing isn't related to writing at all and it's more about having someone who cares about you and thinks you're important.

But numbers are just one thing to be jealous of. Perhaps the envy is instead because of another person's abilities. They come up with such interest plots! They have such fun ideas! They always have the perfect words, the singing phrases. For them it's easy, and for me it's just impossible!

Whether it's easy for them or not isn't what's making us envious, though. It's not about them and their abilities at all. It's about feeling like our own skills are lacking. The envy comes in because that person has what we want and don't yet have.

If we want to get past this type of envy, we need to refocus our energy away from being sad or angry or hopeless because another person is able to do something. Focus instead on celebrating the things we already do well. Take the time to notice improvements. Identify specific things we want to do better, and figure out how to learn. Remember, asking for help is always an option - and it might even lead to that feeling of community that might be lacking too.

Emotions are information that we need to take the time to interpret. Take the time to reflect on what's causing it. Find the thing that's missing from your experience and then figure out how to fill the gap.

#thinky thoughts #I haven't quite got all my thoughts together on this one yet #but I want to put this out there #and see what experiences other folks have had #try to fill in the gaps in my own understanding

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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 8 months

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Of the 19 hijackers who carried out the Sept 11 attacks:

15 were from Saudi Arabia (a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)

2 were from the United Arab Emirates (also a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)

1 was from Egypt, 1 from Lebanon.

None of the hijackers were from Iraq.

None of the Sept 11 hijackers were Iraqi.

None of the 9/11 hijackers were from Iraq.

#9/11 #serious post #not a shitpost #this should be one of the first things kids learn when they learn about the 9/11 attacks #politics #this is just...it's such an essential and brazen fact and i rarely see basic outrage over it #i want outrage. i want fury. i want disgust over the way fundamental facts are disguised and discarded and downplayed #because there are things we should KNOW. basic fact we should ALL KNOW. and they are tucked away in the footnotes.#and no this is NOT to put the blame on other middle eastern countries #we know this was carried out by a specific terrorist organization not a national government #but King George the Second decided (and was encouraged by his cabinet!) to invade a nation!#a nation that was not at all related or responsible!!!#a dictatorship to be sure--but a dictatorship that King George the First had been happy to support #so what changed? why did we go in guns blazing to DEMOLISH a country *we had NO PLANS OF REPAIRING*???#well. because they wanted a villain didn't they. a nice clean war. clarity of purpose. us the heroes against them the villains #and when you're in that mindframe--truth is irrelevant. you can pick your villain (your victim) by rolling a roulette wheel #truth is irrelevant #worse: to the people in charge #truth is a HINDRANCE #'Alternative facts' existed long before it became a catchphrase #facts don't matter. truth doesn't matter. the impulses of a handful of volatile & rich & power-high people--that's History. congratulations

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inkskinned · 9 months

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you're in the habit of denying yourself things.

if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.

but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?

what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.

and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.

you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.

so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.

it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.

sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.

oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.

#warm up #this isn't good #writeblr #this is complicated by the fact i can't stand up too long or i fuckken pass out and <3 hit my damn head <3 #but i did take a deep breath and buy myself the stupid rice cooker #and!!! a very cheap sushi kit!!! i have been wanting to try making sushi for literally YEARS #the kit was only like 15 dollars!!!! and i haven't purchased it bc?!!??!?!?!?!!?#..... i didn't get the mixer tho that felt. like a lot. like too much.#on my list is a kitchenaid. one day when i get a check and i have paid off my student debt #and medical debt #i will put that first little bit of cash #into a kitchenaid 5qt stand mixer (with attachments)#i really do just go into their refurbished section and stare lustily at each option #but yeah i feel guilty about the rice cooker even tho i know for a fact this damn thing is gonna be a lifesaver #oh shit also fuck i forgot to mention . poached eggs

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ickypuppi3 · 1 year

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irulancorrino · 2 months

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bene gesserit costuming + occult and religious imagery

#brought to you by me going down the 'I wonder if anyone has made a dune inspired tarot deck yet' rabbithole #dune #dune part two #irulan corrino #margot fenring #duneedit #the absolute joke of owning almost a dozen tarot decks and still going uhhhh when trying to figure out which cards to put up there #besides the classic rider-waite-smith #in my defense I didn't want them to be modern-looking otherwise I would've chucked the linestrider queen of swords in there #anyhow

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pollyanna-nana · 1 month

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Did anyone else notice that seemingly one of the first things they did after bringing Thistle into the kingdom was cut his hair short?

And given what Marcille says about how important hair is to magic…. That’s probably not a coincidence.

#polly speaks #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #delicious in dungeon #thistle dungeon meshi #thistle posting #I haven’t seen anyone talk about this yet so I wanted to put it out there #obviously he grows it back out but Hmmmmm #Did the Tallmen advisors to the king know abt hair’s relationship to magic?? possible that they heard about it from somewhere and didn’t #want to take any chances

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thelizardperson · 8 months

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#i would put more choices but i ran out of options #also pls rb i want to study tumblr users :O #fursona #furry #poll #polls #survey #sonas #anthro #sfw furry #tumblr polls #tumblr poll #OCs

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tagerrkix · 4 months

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Eden was their ✨disney princess era✨

#it's canon #source: it was revealed to me in a dream #aziraphale being good with reptiles was all part of the ineffable plan #crowley is having the time of his life here #my only regret is that I forgot to include a baby aardvark #but I put ducklings there instead #aardvarks will have to wait #btw the snake aziraphale is holding is my pet snake that died in 2020 #my poor precious baby she was such a sweetheart #she liked to knock the thermometer off the glass and hide it #I was supposed to draw like an ordinary garter snake there buuut #it's MY silly doodle and I get to do what the heck I want with it 👁️👁️#lmao crowley's brain is really malfunctioning here #guys he's a demon the creature of darkness foul fiend devil serpent #guys he can't get up the lamb is sleeping #somebody save him #there are vicious animals #and she's exp-#*JUMPS OUT THE WINDOW AND FLIES AWAY*#hey where the fuck is the gecko going #aziraphale #good omens fanart #crowley #aziracrow #good omens #ineffable husbands

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theoldkyokodied · 1 year

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One wedding and three funerals

Background paintings under the cut

#tomgreg #succession #tom wambsgans #greg hirsch #shiv roy #roman roy #kendall roy #yeah no im not tagging everyone thats too much #this is me going 'how much implications themes and symbolism can i fit in one painting'#yes i gave rose shivs haircolor. if we ever find out how she looks like and its not like this im just gonna pass away i guess #but yeah i hope yall connect the dots #i put waaay too much thought and work into this. i was googling pictures of all the actors as kids just for reference (sigh)#honestly kinda wanted to make tom and greg link pinkies as like. a pinkie promise. but that was too hard to draw in this angle #at least not without obstructing the view of the ring which is important to see so ya #my fave is actually the tomshiv wedding pic i went off with that. i love them... they should have run away to become sheep farmers fr fr #anyway im so glad im done with this UGH!! finally i can draw smth else without being like oh noooo i need to finish this #i see a lot of you wondering why there is no portrait of logan but one of ewan #it's bc the placement of the painting represent their standing. logans portray would not hang next to the stairs #his present portrait hangs at the end of it. all the way up at the top. alone and withering away #basically the picture you see underneath ewan to the right? its where toms parents would be. the right side of the wall is tom and gregs #and the left one is the roy siblings theirs. since they grew up rich rich. and tom and greg didn't #but ya thats why ewan hangs here and logan does not :)

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hiphopcherrrypop · 6 months

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uhm guys i don't think they're running lines in there...!!!

this wasss. first version im sorry scollace nation for defacing semi-win or whatever but i just couldnt bear 2 draw todd in scott outfit with scott hair.