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sunflowersandsapphires · 7 months

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Renegade

pairing: Matt Murdock x fem!reader

summary: A rough night lands Matt on your doorstep, bleeding and overstimulated. It’s your job to remind him of his strengths and bring him back from the brink of despair.

warnings: swearing, Matt’s depression, slight violence

a/n: This fic takes place in the Wake Up verse, but you do not need to have read all of that series for this one to make sense. @babygrlmurdock requested that I write a fic based on Taylor Swift’s Renegade so here is that! SO sorry for how long this took me, dear. I’ve had it written for over a month but I was waiting until Wake Up was all posted. I hope you like it!!

w/c: 2.8k

He’s not quite sure what triggered the fight or flight response, nor the spiral of doubt that followed. Maybe it was the stress of a week of cases with impenetrable prosecutors. Or maybe the way that the old man he’d nearly failed to save from a robbery gone wrong had used the same soap that Stick once used. Regardless, Matt was currently drowning in a series of flashbacks from his childhood.

The rough voice of his old mentor pierced his ears, even though he was alone as he hurdled from roof to roof towards his apartment. You coward. You sniveling weakling. Get back out there and fight like a man.

His breathing was rapid and his heart felt like it was going to fall out of his rib cage at any moment. Willing his brain to shut Stick up, he vaulted to the next building.

Apparently this was not what Stick’s ghost wanted him to do. Quit your fucking whining and turn around, kid. Or are you too fucking soft to fight bumbling idiots now? Worthless sack of shit.

As illogical as it would seem in the future, Matt could feel Stick gaining on him. Tears were pouring down his face as he begged the vision to leave him alone.

A cruel laugh rang in his mind. I see the Devil still can’t handle the truth. Isn’t justice all about people taking accountability, Matty? Are you so useless that you can’t even own up to your stupid mistakes?

Feeling a withered hand on his wrist, his steps faltered and he careened into a gravel pit on the roof before him. Scrambling away from the intangible figure, he screamed. “NO! No, get away. Get away, Stick!” His back collided with concrete as he reached the perimeter of the surface he’d crash landed on. Fists clenching painfully, his head darted around wildly as he tried to find any sign of the man.

The same mirthless laugh sounded again, booming like a pistol at an execution. Away from what, Matty? I’m part of you now. Your crazy ass will never be rid of me.

Hobbling to his feet, Matt took a breath and tried to regain any sense of direction, hurling his wobbly body towards his apartment once again.

His knees finally gave out when he reached the roof of his building. Stupid. Worthless. Crazy. Useless. The expanding list of insults circled his frazzled mind, adding to his frenzy. Scurrying inside and down the stairs, he ripped his face free of his mask. Panting, he sank back to the floor, trying to calm down. Yanking off his gloves and beginning to undo the suit, he was taunted once again.

You think a pansy like you will be able to save the people you claim to love? You couldn’t save your father. You couldn’t save Elektra. And, when the day comes, you won’t save her.

“Shut UP!” Matt roared, hurling his billy club in the direction of the voice. Glass shattered in the distance. Pressing his palms to the floor, he rested his head on the wood and tried to force the new wave of thoughts out of his mind—this time focused on the inevitability of your lifeless body in his arms. Fumbling with the suit's pockets, he grasped his burner phone for dear life. Shaking hands finding the buttons he needed, he held his breath as the phone rang once, twice.

After four rings, when his heart was seconds from breaking, you answered.

“Hey darling, you ok?” Your voice was hoarse with sleep and he cringed as he realized he’d woken you up at some sinful hour. Useless. You won’t save her.

“Love?” You tried again, hesitant to use his real name when you had no idea who was on the other line.

“Yah. I-I’m fine.” Matt stifled a sob poorly. “So—Sorry to wake you.”

“That’s alright, baby. You can wake me whenever you need to, remember?” A brief memory of you consenting to his late night requests for medical help flashed through his mind at your prompting. “Where are you? Are you hurt?”

“Not hurt. ‘M at home.” He answered shakily. “Need you, please.”

“O-ok! Yep, I am coming right now. Give me a minute to get there, I have to get a cab—“ You thought aloud, but Matt interrupted you.

“NO! No. It’s late. It’s not safe. I’ll come to you.” He cursed his lack of consideration for your safety. You won’t save her. Stupid.

“Are you sure, love? It’s not a problem!” He could hear your growing concern and it filled his eyes with tears again.

“I’m sure. Is that ok?”

“Of course that’s ok. Always, my darling. Did you want me to stay on the phone with you?” He sobbed as you parroted the question he always asked you when you called him.

“No. I’ll be there—be there soon.” He managed.

“Ok, love. Get here safe, please.”

After what felt like hours, a soft tapping on your window alerted you to your boyfriend’s whereabouts.

Rushing to help him through the small frame, Matt collapsed into your arms, not exactly giving you the relief you’d optimistically hoped for. But, he was alive.

“Hey, hey, I gotcha. You’re safe now, my love. Where are you hurt?”

Matt gave a pitiful shake of his head.

“You’re—you’re not hurt?” Your question was laced with your genuine confusion.

Matt shook his head again, tears pooling in his haunted eyes.

“Ok, well…let’s get you cleaned up and into comfier clothes.” You glanced at Matt’s rumpled Devil suit. He’d removed pieces but hadn’t changed out of it, apparently.

Maneuvering the vigilante into your bathroom, you frowned at him. “Shower?” You asked, but Matt whimpered so you quickly pivoted. “Ok love, no shower. That’s alright.”

Thinking for a moment, you gently set him down on the lid of the toilet and started the tap. Grabbing the softest cloth you could find, you soaked it in scalding water. Letting it cool for a moment, you began unclasping the body portion of his suit. Slipping the tight fabric off of his torso, you inspected the damage before getting to work.

Swiping the cloth as tenderly as you could across his skin, you started by cleaning his face. Streaks of dirt, sweat, and blood mingled on his porcelain skin, but they quickly vanished under your touch.

“If it’s too hot, or you want to stop, just give me a shove or something, ok?” You’d never seen Matt in such a state of distress and you wanted him to retain his power of choice as much as possible.

Moving down his pummeled body, you carefully cleaned his neck and torso. Gently turning him to clean his back, you bit back a gasp, only just now registering the scrapes and bruises along his side. It almost looked like road rash. What did you get yourself into, darling?

Taking extra caution to not aggravate the injured space, you cleaned every inch of skin currently exposed to you.

“Ok. The top half of you is clean. I’m going to treat the scrapes on your side then we can finish washing up. That ok?” You waited for his small nod before grabbing the neosporin from the first aid kit.

Once Matt was cleaned and his wounds were treated, you guided him to your bedroom where you provided him with a set of fresh clothes that he’d purposefully left there. Sliding the sleeves of the sweatshirt over his trembling fists, you let out a breath.

“All done, my darling. Did you want to get into bed?”

Matt nodded and you obediently began to tuck him in, sliding in next to him once he was settled. Stiffly, he repositioned himself so that he was laying across your chest, one ear over your heart. Finally, he gave a sigh, going limp across your torso.

“There’s my sweet boy.” You murmured, scratching at his scalp in the way he adored. “It’s just us. We’re both safe.”

The two of you were wrapped in silence for a bit before Matt’s demons reared their ugly heads once more.

Coward. Weakling. Fuck up. Matt whined, burrowing his face into your chest as fresh tears cascaded down his cheeks.

“Hey, what happened, Matty? Where does it hurt? What’s wrong?” Your hand stilled against his head and he felt the tears come faster. Grasping the hand in his hair, he begged.

“Please don’t stop.”

Immediately, you began running your fingers through his fluffy hair again. “Ok love. I won’t stop. What hurts?”

“Head. Too loud.”

“I’m being too loud?” Your voice softened before he could respond.

Shaking his head, he took a stuttering breath. “My thoughts. Too loud.”

It was starting to click for you. Matt had offhandedly mentioned that this could happen after his nighttime activities. Sometimes, he bottled up so much that it all came pouring out unexpectedly and overwhelmed him. You weren’t a stranger to the feeling, so you offered a way forward.

“I’m sorry they’re too loud, my love. Would you like to tell me what they’re saying?”

Matt shook his head miserably. “Can you—“ He stuttered, taking a deep breath before attempting to finish the thought. “Do you remember when we talked about me not being enough?”

You hummed in affirmation, waiting for him to continue.

“Can you…can you tell me again? That I’m…good?”

“Oh Matty, of course I can!” Your own eyes threatened to well up at his impossibly quiet request. Your poor boy was suffering so intensely and all he had needed was a few kind words?

You tugged him upwards just a touch so that he could bury his face in your neck. He’d told you once that feeling you talk while being wrapped in your scent was comforting. You were hoping that would be the case tonight.

“You are good, my beloved Matthew Michael Murdock. So so good. You amaze me every single day. You are so compassionate and you save lives every single day. Not just as the Devil, but as Matt Murdock the phenomenal defense attorney too.” You poked his chest and he nuzzled further into your neck, sniffling still.

“And you’re smart. The smartest person I’ve ever known, truly. The ways that you craft arguments and problem solve are unmatched. Like, a few weeks ago when you won that manslaughter case by showing that the woman had CPTSD. That was fucking incredible, darling, and you spared her children from losing their mother. Your intelligence is life changing, my love.”

Matt’s tears had slowed, but you could still feel his shaky breathing against your throat. You pressed a kiss to the bridge of his nose before continuing.

“You are so brave. In and out of the suit, honey. The number of times you’ve put yourself at risk to better the city is innumerable. You’ve faced threats that even the Avengers refused to take on. You’re a hero, Matt. A fantastic one.” Shifting so that you were face to face, you pressed your forehead to his.

“You are good and sweet and smart and brave and also the best boyfriend a girl could ever ask for. I’ve never met someone who loves so passionately. You make me feel like I’m a priority and your devotion is inspiring, love. I know you worry about splitting your time between me and your firm and the city but I promise you’re the best partner I’ve ever had. I love you so much, darling.”

Matt was trembling in your arms, fighting back more sobs. You pulled him impossibly closer, placing gentle kisses on his cheeks, jaw, and forehead. “I love you, Matthew Murdock. You are magnificent and I will tell you over and over until you believe it.”

“Thank you.” Matt murmured against your neck as he nestled into your embrace. “I’m sorry, I—“

You pressed a gentle kiss at the corner of his mouth to interrupt his self-loathing. “No need to thank me or apologize, my love. I’m here for you, good days and bad.”

Wrapped in your embrace, Matt felt the ghosts of his past failures dissipate. He let his tired eyes fall closed as you massaged his scalp, swallowing to ease the pain in his dry throat. You shifted underneath him and he moaned subconsciously, tightening his grip on your waist. Chuckling beneath him, you brushed a hand over the hair on his forehead.

“I know you want to be glued to my side until we both pass out, but you need water and painkillers. And, given what I know about your nightly routine, probably a snack?” Your reasonable tone did nothing to appease the Matt-shaped octopus latched onto you, who growled and held you closer.

“You’re a cute little devil, you know that? Did you want to stay here or come with me to the kitchen?” In lieu of a response, Matt shifted so that his leg was hooked over your hips, smiling at the resulting jolt of arousal from you. “Matthew, you know I adore this weighted blanket position, but you need water. At the bare fucking minimum. Drink a glass or two for me and I’ll let you cuddle me for hours.” With another low growl, Matt rolled off of you, giving you the opportunity to slide off of the bed. Taking his hand, you carefully pulled him to the kitchen.

Filling a glass with cool water you handed him a couple of painkillers and narrowed your eyes, “Drink all of that, please. I see your stage sips, you goon.” Matt’s lips quirked up and he dutifully switched to actually drinking the water.

Winding yourself around his waist, you nuzzled into his cheek with a quick kiss. “Thank you. Are you hungry at all?” Matt pondered for a moment before giving a shrug so you handed him a granola bar, taking the now empty glass from him. With your arm still hooked around his waist, you drew soft patterns on his hip while he ate. Gracefully tossing the wrapper into the trash, Matt pulled you into an unyielding embrace.

“I love you.” He whispered into your hair. You squeezed your arms around his waist.

“I love you too. Now let’s get some sleep or I’ll be unbearable tomorrow.” Matt huffed a laugh and clasped your hand firmly as you padded back into the bedroom.

Drawing in a breath, Matt shuddered awake as the lack of your warmth finally became too much for his subconscious to bear. Whining involuntarily, he let his eyelids slide open as he searched for your presence. Thankfully, it didn’t take more than a moment for him to realize that you were in the kitchen. Your steady heartbeat was surrounded by the soft scraping of a whisk and the smell of brown sugar.

Scrubbing at his irritated eyes, he sighed, debating his next move. While he always craved your touch, he really was not ready to start his day yet. As if you had his superhuman senses, you set down whatever you were cooking in the kitchen and retreated to the sanctuary of his room. He heard your breath hitch as your eyes landed on him and it squeezed his heart in a way he was not overly familiar with.

“Mornin’ sleepyhead. Feeling ok?” Your voice was soft as you sat on the mattress inches from his hip. Hand sliding into his hair, you leaned back onto the pillows gazing at his pretty face.

Submitting to your hair petting happily, Matt made a noise akin to a purr. Giggling, you pressed closer, kneading at his scalp with a bit more vigor. “Mmm feeling fine, I guess.” His voice was rough from his breakdown the night before, forcing him to clear his throat before continuing. “Head hurts a bit.”

Clucking in sympathetic disapproval, you lessened the pressure you were applying to his crown. “I’ll grab you some water and Advil. I was about to make some pancakes, would you like a plate?” Matt nodded, burying himself in your chest and placing sweet kisses along your collarbone.

“If I have time. I should probably get dressed. I’m guessing it’s about time for us to leave?”

Pressing a kiss to his temple, you shifted uneasily. “About that…I may have called Foggy and asked if you could have a day off? Before you get upset, I told him that I had a bad week and wanted you to stay with me today.”

Matt felt the pressure in his chest lift and he smiled. “I’m not upset, sweetness. Do you have the day off too?”

You nodded against his hair, heart still jogging with anxiety about his reaction. Matt shifted so that his forehead could fall against yours. Pressing a kiss to your nose, he cupped your cheek with his hand. “Thank you, angel. I’d be honored to spend the day with you. Since you need me so much.” He pinched your side and you squealed.

The rest of the morning flowed by slowly, complete with stacks of incredible pancakes and syrupy kisses. Matt’s intrusive thought had quieted, for now, replaced with your beautiful laugh and steady pulse.

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thowawayuntilfurthernotice · 5 months

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I dunno what's sadder, the fact that trolls can post this type of shit and not get banned, or that this coward is using a burner account to harass everyone who is posting Pro Palestine content.

#Palestine #Free Palestine #Gaza #Current Events #Politics #Ceasefire

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mossy-opal · 6 months

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@/brokenburner

Well I have to hand it to you, you adorable miserable little parasite you, your grammar has gotten significantly better since your first message! I hope you're not slacking on your little persona for lil' ol' me~

Now that that's out of the way, let's get to it, shall we?

First and foremost, sweetie, snookums, darling, twat, don't throw a tantrum and project your nasty little habits onto me.

My friends know who they are, and they know just how much they mean to me- Internet "fame" aside.

I don't give a shit about infamy, touch grass.

Second, constructive criticism is that in it of itself, constructive. What you said to me was the least bit.

Third, I know you know my anons are off because of cowards like you. Cowards, who go out of their way to make burner accounts to harass people because they're scared of repercussions.

Which brings me to my fourth and final point; If you have my discord, message me! I promise I'm not that scary, despite what you think~! Unless of course, oh my, I may have you blocked!! What a tragedy! But, if that's the case,

Eat my fine ass you stupid fucking cunt, you're blocked for a reason~ 🩷

Talk to ya never, bestie~

😘

#asked and answered!#bite me 😘

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melaninjoys · 1 year

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y’all seeing what i’m seeing right? i told myself i was gonna be through with this situation but this girl literally admitted that she’ll keep dragging it on cause she got nothing else to lose 😭. bitch i literally lost chadwick so you’re literally proving that you’re ALWAYS making shit about you as if no one else has been in your shoes before. i can make you face what you done to me too! WITH ACTUAL PROOF. i’ll never be stain of you or your pain cause i can do bad all by myself trust and believe that. i’m a coward but yet you can’t face me behind one of your burner accounts? make it make sense. you’re admitting to wishing ill on my partner and i so that doesn’t make you better than me. it don’t. i’ll continue to deny your love for aaron if i want to, just like you continuing to drag this situation on to invoke some joy in your sad little life. i’m sure we’ll linger in the back of your mind and you’ll regret everything that you did 😘. i’ll be fine. we’ll be fine. you’re making this way too deep than it needs to be. go seek some psychological help cause the internet won’t do it for you boo.

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texasthegreatdestroyer · 2 years

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I'm starting to see a trend with these bastards. They get around anons with burner accounts. They harass people behind a disguise because they're fucking cowards. They would never link their shit to accounts they use frequently because they don't want their safe space getting attacked. Because they're fucking losers. They'll never have anything better to do with their life than to sit there and jab at people because they're so god damn miserable. Their life will never amount to anything and so they have to take others down with them. Pathetic. Yall are failures. Miserable.

#sims 4 anti paywall #sims 4 scams sims 4 patreon #sims 4 cc #sims 4 #sims 4 cc sales #sims4 #sims4cc #anti paywall #anti paysites

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cryptideye · 2 years

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i hope the tma anon who left that very bad response in my inbox is having a horrible day today

#im still reeling over that bc it read EXACTLY like the deltarune anon.#zero reading comprehension. a slew of jumping to conclusions over a post where i EXPLICITLY STATE #that what im saying in the post isnt really a big deal and that i dont really mind it that much #how do you jump from 'this kinda bugs me but whatever im probably just oversensitive from past negative experience' to 'this person hates #ME SPECIFICALLY and probably tells people to die in their spare time theyre such a bully GRRRRRRR i need to send a response'#'but on anon of course. because i am a coward who somehow gains satisfaction from doing the tumblr equivalent of shouting #'IM RIGHT YOURE WRONG' at someone and then running away with their ears plugged before the person theyre doing it to can even see who they #are #its SO weird to me bc when i have something to say i take pride in actually typing a long ass response thats properly formatted and worded #and tying that TO MY ACCOUNT. because if im bothering to type something out i TRULY believe that i am correct #and as such as willing to back up my statements with my own face #i seriously have NO tolerance or the petty cowardice shit ohhh my god #im so glad i turned anon off its been a blessing ever since #every day i live in peace bc cowards now have no way of contacting me unless they use a burner #i am a little kitty laying in a sunbeam rn #whoops i forgot an end quote somewhere in there whoopsies

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kingkatsuki · 2 years

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This isn't really an ask but can I rant for a bit? (You can ignore this if you want tho)

Uh so, a few hours ago I was blocked by one of my favorite creator's on this app 🤧 but only after they made a post and @ me for there whole entire blog to see. They made false claims about me "bullying" and fetishizing" and ect on their blog and also said I sent them hurtful messages. Now all these claims are untrue I only had 4 people in my dms and 3 of which ask me for my pronouns and the last was thanking me for reading their blog. But back to the point. After they @ me and said these false claims , I've had a bunch of people messages me and comment rude shit to me on my blog. No matter how many times I try to prove my innocents they don't stop, it's to many people for me to block all of them and I'm seriously considering deleting this account and tumblr all together. I do have a second account tho which I switched over to so I could go and confront them but they've changed their user and everything. Should I quit or just make a new account?

It’s a hard one because I don’t know the entire situation or whatever, but just based solely on personal experience it depends how strong a person you are I guess?

If people are messaging you on anon, turn anon off. It’s the easiest way for cowards on the internet to try and hurt you, and honestly they’ll get bored eventually.

If they’re messaging with their accounts/burner accounts block, block, block. Again, it doesn’t matter how many times or how much they comment, they’ll eventually get bored too.

Whenever someone calls you out on the internet, whether the claims are true or not, they’ll always kinda hang around you I suppose. Like there will always be people who like or dislike you for it, and that’s fair enough. But it depends if you feel like you can continue on past this on your blog, or whether you need to restart to make your safe space safe again.

I’m lucky I have my amazing friends around me when there’s been discourse, and I’ve been there for my friends too- so no matter what people say it makes it easier to cope with when you have a support system.

People on the internet are malicious, there will always be people that don’t like you and there will be people you don’t like too- and some people would rather post elaborate callout posts instead of just blocking and moving on.

I don’t know what they’re saying about you, but only you can decide what’s best for you and your account.

I hope things work out for you, Anon. Whatever is going on💕

#jo talks

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giggly-agenda · 3 years

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I've been seeing multiple of my friends getting attacked because of what they choose to create content for, whether it's cosplay, writing, drawings, etc.

And honestly, I don't get people.

They're mature and bold enough to come out of nowhere and waste not only their own time, but ours by writing out unnecessary shit, and bringing everyone's mood down. But they're not mature enough to learn to just scroll past? Mute, and block people if they want to be extra petty for no goddamn reason?

I really want to know why they do it. Because while their fucked up ass is out here making themselves feel better by making others feel like shit, they're also only dragging in more people to hate them. Of course though, what does it matter? They're too much of a fucking coward to show themselves and instead hides behind burner accounts and anon buttons.

If you're gonna try to be all big and 'badass', and bring others down because of what their interests are, how much they create for one topic or Fandom, or how they decide to portray something, at least make yourself known and deal with the consequences that you bring on yourself.

And if you're one of those people who make extra accounts just to hate on people for whatever reason, get the fuck off my blog.

#vent post #There's so much more I want to say but I'm not good with words.#𝙽𝚘𝚡 #Nox.vents

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dolugecat · 3 years

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It’s sad that I do end up experiencing some weird anti-Asian racism on this site, considering I’m a Mob Psycho 100 blog, ya know, an ASIAN thing with ASIAN characters. If anyone be racist to asians, do everyone a favor and stop watching anime, using paper, drinking tea, and mathematics, you clowns. I know you wouldn’t say that shit to me offline, so y’all stay hidden in anon or burner accounts. Fuck off, and non-Asians boost pls bc why are East Asians being harassed in a fandom for an East Asian piece of media????? You see how dumb that is, right? Yeah, that’s why you stay hidden, cowards

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #personal #rant #my post #serious

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tomonari-nue · 3 years

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For the ask meme: BCFGMST! You seem really cool and an excellent writer and I wanna know more about you

B: Any of your stories inspired by personal experience?

That depends! Some of my OC driven stories do have certain aspects of myself based on my own experiences, sometimes I even apply them to canon characters, mostly because it’s very easy for me to talk about things that I’ve experienced myself. So I do tend to draw inspiration from IRL experiences! Actually, the shirt Yuuji’s wearing in keep you close (wherever i am) is actually based on my favourite shirt LMAOO–

C: What character do you identify with most?

Oh christ, that’s a hard one! I’d say it would be a very weird mix between Yuuji, Maki and Geto JKJJFJK– I think with Yuuji it’s the desire to have choices in life and complete autonomy over it, something that is continuously challenged in the story with the circumstances he finds himself in and Sukuna. It just kind of resonates with me to have this feeling over not being completely in control over yourself and despairing over it.

With Maki, I suppose is the family side of things; I have a bit of a difficult relationship with one side of the family and I can kind of relate with Maki on how she wants to rise above them out of pure desire to be better and out of spite – just this big Fuck You that’s says “I know you tried hard to break me, but guess what, I’m still here!”.

With Geto, it’s mostly just with his younger counterpart, being furious at the injustices he faces and the moral dilemma he gets out of it. Obviously I never got anywhere near the deep-end like he did, but on some level, I can relate to his downfall. I understand why he did it, even if it’s terrible, and it made me think of how I too was faced with really shit chapters in my life – made me wonder what the other choices were back then. On some levels, Geto is almost a personal cautionary tale for me.

F: Care to share a favorite hurt/comfort fic?

God, I am absolutely terrible with fic sharing, because none ever stick to my mind permanently. But I do love @nanamispto‘s fics because the way they engage emotions and the thought processes behind them. They just handle raw emotions very thoughtfully and gently, it’s very comforting to read even when you feel sad.

G: Care to share a favorite crack fic?

Literally give me any fic that has the trio being stupid teenagers in it and/or bully Sukuna. Actually, YOUR FIC CAME TO MY MIND!! I cannot stress enough how I actually laughed outloud when reading it; their antics were hilarious, especially Nobara waterboarding a fucking plate had me cackling.

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share?

I have way too many WIPs and ideas but...

there’s another Tokyo Trio Friendship (?) fic I’m trying to finish, but let’s be real, I probably will sneak in Itafushikugi feels again, because I love them and their relationship gives me serotonin.

and then there is a fun 5+1 Itafushi fic I’m also trying to finish and I love it because it’s hilarious since it’s just Megumi being an absolute disaster around Yuuji. I need more of that in my life.

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

Answered here!

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

Love Triangles – stop being cowards, Polycules are literally right there. Also, I don’t know if that’s a trope but it’s something that irks me a lot, taking one aspect of a perfect three-dimensional character and making that their only personality – there are more facettes you can work with! Get complex! Explore! I’m tired of seeing all the Yuuji is the Dumb one tropes and not taking into account how he’s a fast learner and incredibly compassionate! I’m tired of the saying that Megumi is the Calm one, when he has a temper and is constantly holding himself back from violence! I’m tired of not seeing Nobara’s emotionally insightful side that constantly meshes with her ego! STOP GIVING ME UNFAITHFUL GOJO FICS WHEN HE’S STILL TRAUMATISED FROM HIS CHILDHOOD AND GENUINELY CARES FOR HIS STUDENTS BECAUSE OF THOSE EXPERIENCES!

But I guess I can attribute that to the huge amount of Explicit Fics that I keep finding in the tag, like, sure have fun but uh, ANYONE HAVE SOME PLOT IN HERE? SOME FOUND FAMILY?

#cursed technique: ask

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finderskeepersff · 5 years

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55. Part 2

“You know you better change that caption Cassius, I ain’t playing” resting my chin just on his shoulder watching him, I ain’t playing with him calling me dick pleaser on his caption “I am watching, go on” he ain’t typing because he is thinking of something stupid, it’s the first time he is putting me on his page and he wants to be a whole ass dummy over it “I actually want to see your bio too while you’re at it, I let you off too much. You don’t even have a picture of me, and guess what I have you on my page. I am going to delete your pictures” Cassius cackled “ok, ok, I will be good” I will bite him if he does be stupid again “ok, just close your eyes” he moved away from me so I cant see his phone “seriously, like I am not playing with you” staring at him as he typed what ever the fuck he want “I am aggy with you actually, how you got more followers with some simple ass shit” Cassius snorted laughing “simple ass shit? Clearly my face is good enough” I bet his profile is not locked “well I can also have that, just I have my account locked, let me take that off and we will see” I don’t pay much attention to this but I am now “so you ready?” nodding my head, we ain’t left this car because he kept trying to be ugly “me and Sofia” he took that long write that “give me your phone” reaching over “I am joking, just relax. Read it” he held his phone out to me “my fiancée Sofia, my think-piece. My trap queen and the woman at my side to make shit happen. You see how beautiful she is, she loved this hood nigga and now she rolling in a Lambo. This nigga is in love with her goofy ass” I read out from his phone, looking up from his phone “you try so hard to not be cute, I take that from you” looking down at his phone and posted the picture “so I want to see how many bitches thirst over you” I really would like to see “that picture of Kyle and I, that got many likes. I am rolling” side eyeing him, taping on the image of him and Kyle, the first comment is run a train on me “you follow this chick?” tapping on her name “why do you follow her?” Cassius shrugged “I know her actually, she lives in my block. I don’t really care for it, you my baby” he took the phone from me “am I” I don’t know how to feel about it.

Olivia smiled at me “Cassius why don’t you get me Cartier’ bottle and make it and then you feed him, take him” Olivia looked at Cassius and I, Cassius is fine but I am not. I don’t know what to feel about a lot of the things. Like I know he wouldn’t fuck on me, he is too stuck on me and he wouldn’t leave my side but I don’t think he should be following these girls on there and then talking to Celine, it’s not logical to speak to her “we was just watching Jungle Book, weren’t we?” Cartier is more happy to see his hands, I don’t know what Mia is on “you must be bored with these girl my young don” Cassius took Cartier “how did your little meeting go? Olivia fell asleep and snored, she won’t admit to it” Olivia put a finger up at Mia but Olivia does snore, just nobody says anything “god bless Kenton’ ears” I had to laugh “sorry” I said through my laugh “mhmm, bitch asses” that was funny “so it went fine, we was outside the house for a while actually” Mia shuffled over to me so Olivia can sit “we heard the damn car” that is true “it went ok, I guess. So Cassius told me that he is speaking to Celine, in regards to Bryce” I am not saying the real truth that Carnell sold him “I don’t like that” Olivia put her finger up “one minute, the same bitch I was going to fight. Is he on crack?” side eyeing Olivia “I mean not literally but why? She likes him, she clearly wants his dick again Sofia. Don’t have that, no way. She was in your home flirting with him, you being too nice with all that” Olivia is not quiet “it’s not that I am being nice but Cassius likes to use Celine in other ways, I don’t like to be on his case about things but that is my cousin, she fucked my man and I still find that annoying-” I stopped speaking seeing Cassius “test that for me” Olivia is giving Cassius dead eyes “where are you going to feed him?” hopefully not here, testing the milk on my wrist “that is fine” passing him the bottle “just in the room, I mean bedroom. I will probably fall asleep” nodding my head.

“So yeah, I don’t like it and I said it to him but I know he isn’t fully getting it but I don’t like to be on his case but he had sex with this girl for years. He may not have verbally claimed her but she was there, he would stay at her place and everything and I don’t want him to have contact with her. I mean could he stray away from me and then on top of that” Mia touched my hand “why are you are getting upset, Sofia” I smiled trying to not cry “I just don’t want to lose him, you know. There is many girls out there that want this and are better than me, I try and not be on his case because I don’t want to lose him. I am scared. Then on his Instagram, he has all that now. I never paid attention to it and I did in the car, he never posted me. Just him and his son, and the girls are wild for it. He follows these girls, what do you think? How am I supposed to be ok with that? Then he said it’s nothing. I know her, you probably did Cassius, you probably fucked her too and I know he did, that winking emoji does it. I know he loves me but it doesn’t harm anyone if I don’t know” wiping the tear that fell “this needs to be nipped in the bud quick, I think Cassius wouldn’t stray away. Niggas that wash your hair are to keep, not a lie. I think he does love you so he wouldn’t do that, Cassius seems like a guy that doesn’t see the wrong in it. She’s a friend and that is it, you don’t really bark at Cassius like you should. We all do it, I did it with Mitch and you remember that time. I was like fuck you I am gone, you need to tell him you don’t like it. He can’t be speaking to a woman or women he was fucking. He has a girl he is marrying here and that is worth ten of them, Sofia stop it. Do not cry, he is not straying away or disliking you, I think it is far from that. He doesn’t see the wrong in it, I mean Cassius doesn’t the wrong in many things I see that” I am such an emotional wreck “I think you should get his phone and see first” Olivia added “don’t be weak either” I just want an easy life.

I am weak, I know I am weak but I need to suck it up and raise it with him. Pushing the door open, I expected Cassius to be awake but he isn’t “Sofia” Mia said behind me “what?” turning to her “get his phone” nodding my head, I don’t want the burner phone so I hope that I can just find his phone, I just want to see for myself without him shrugging it off, I don’t like it and I never raised it with him and I forgot all about the Insta page and now I think of it, it’s wrong. It’s just not good, I want to see. Looking over at the bed seeing Cassius and Cartier asleep in bed, they are so cute together. I knew he would fall asleep, walking around the bed. Lowkey Cassius can be scary, he is not openly scary to me but he has that side to him so I hope he just stays asleep and I can just check and then know what I am working with. His phone is always on the side table but it don’t look like it is this time, so it has to be in his pocket. Lifting up the bed cover, it’s there in his pocket but how the hell can I actually get that. Maybe I should just leave it but then it’s going to drive me crazy, it’s kind of awkward getting a phone out of a jean pocket but let me try this. Looking up at Cassius, and he is still asleep. Slowly digging into his pocket, I gasped as Cassius gripped my wrist “what are you doing?” fear hit me quick.

I swallowed hard “what are you doing Sofia?” he said again, this is not good but I don’t care I need to do it “I want to see your phone” I said, I said it but that slight fear in me wanted me to be a coward about this “why?” He didn’t let my wrist go “because I don’t like what I saw earlier, I would like to see your phone” he let my wrist go “they put you up to this? I mean look at it, I don’t really care but that is dumb” looking over at the door, Mia and Olivia are both there watching “no, let me correct you there Cassius. I want to see it, it was me that told them about this, it’s me. So give me it” Cassius is angry at me, the look he is giving is really not cute and I feel the second argument coming “have it, do as you please Sofia but you fooling yourself” he unlocked his phone “that is all” taking his phone “who said you can take it out of the room?” he said as I walked off “me!” I retorted.

Cassius did come down, and he has made himself comfortable to watch me “you know these girl you have followed how do you know them? They all look like hoes” Cassius laughed “I follow you, does that make you one? They ain’t hoes Sofia” squinting my eyes at him “so who are they Cassius, answer me that. You don’t know them? What is it?. Mia and Olivia, I want to speak to him alone” he will probably speak better “sure, I am going to get something to eat, come on Olivia” Mia got up from the couch “ain’t no secret Sofia, I do know them from school and then now” who is this Bianca, why is she messaging him. Looking up from the phone waiting for them to leave “I fuck with them, I had sex with them. That is what you wanted to know, technically I know them” looking back down at the phone “I don’t want to speak wrong of the dead but if I was to be good with Jordan and I fucked him, which I didn’t, you would be cool with that? Your brother, you fine with that?” I know he wouldn’t be “but you didn’t” he said “I didn’t! Because I fucked you!” I pointed at him “Bianca? Who is that? Y’all message a lot on this” Cassius sighed out “a school friend, my ex in school. I was a teenager” he defended “but nigga you ain’t one now, talking about meet me?” looking at Cassius “read the rest then” looking back down at the message “I know what I put in there, I said no. I said I have a son, I have a wife. I don’t play that, so she said I feel that. And then the messages were fine, I ain’t fucking on you Sofia. What do you want me to do!? I follow females, but that ain’t shit. Don’t be toxic like your friends, use your own brain. You know me, you just jumping off one thing” pulling a face at him.

“Don’t call my friends toxic, they ain’t that. I went to them because I was so upset, Celine is a no Cassius. These girls that have had your dick is a no too, when will you get it, when will you accept that you and Celine is a no. I feel you have this bond with her you can’t let go, am I right? Why can’t you just let her go, she fucking wants you. My friend fought her on what? She saw it. And you openly call her when you know she wants you, these bitches want you, and you think I can’t feel insecure. I don’t think you are cheating but just for you to look at these girls and feel some type of way, am I not that good” Cassius rubbed his temples on his head “not that good? If I wanted a girl that wanted me for just money then I can get that, you came into my life and you was all feelings, I ain’t that. I find it hard at times to show that but with you I do because I love you woman! I want you, I love you, I have cried for you. I have sat here and seen things and thought will this look good on Sofia, what will Sofia look like as a bride and you think I look at these hoes and care? Fuck Celine, I don’t care for her. What you want me to do to make you feel better? I don’t like this, I don’t like you upset and why are you crying!?” wiping the tears that fell “you said you imagined me as a bride” I sobbed out “wow, I mean yes I did. Don’t cry” Cassius took his phone from me and sat next to me “you ain’t insecure, I don’t believe that hype. I don’t want no other woman, trust me on that. I don’t post you on there because you mine and I don’t like niggas seeing you like that” Cassius held my hand, I am a mess.

Cassius’ thumb lightly grazed my hand “I don’t like you sad, I really don’t Sofia. I am not doing anything to upset you at all. I am not” I feel stupid “I just see other females and I don’t like it, even with Celine. I don’t want to lose you and it’s like what if I am just annoying, even now. I wasn’t doubting your trust, I was doubting other girls. I mean look at Bianca, she wants you” I hope he understands “but I want you, I get it. Because I dislike other men with you, trust me I do understand but you shouldn’t let doubts come into your mind like that because you and I are here for the long run, it hurts to know you don’t think I was being faithful. You think I can be bothered with any other girl? I mean that is the laughable part, I can’t be bothered with much Sofia. You being highly sensitive though” looking up at him “don’t cry” he wiped my tears “you know I was thinking, when we old. I would wipe your ass” I snorted laughing “shut up, you will be older than me. You’re already thirty dummy” he is so cute when he smiles “then you can wipe my ass, I am good with that. Clean my wrinkly balls” I gagged “be quiet” he is so disgusting.

Cassius placed his arm around me “on a real, I just want you to know that I am yours. For the first time I am seeing us getting old together, I never thought that far ahead because I didn’t see it with the shit that was going on. If I felt that I wanted another woman why would I think that, you know the funny thing. In these kind of situations I usually go to Kyle and ask him for help, I am so bad at this but I did it myself. I am learning, I learning how to love and how to be a better person for you. Why would I do that for what? Just to cheat with some random bitch, ok I followed some girls that I do actually know but I ain’t got nothing to hide, and yes they do be some random bitches that come into my DMs but that ain’t nothing, I love you Sofia” I feel bad now “I am sorry” I apologised “why you saying sorry? You acted on what you saw, I am not angry with you. I mean I did get annoyed but I had nothing to hide. Sofia I ain’t that guy to be taking it out on you and then call you out on it, I am not here for that. I am just here to love you. And you acted that way because I didn’t really explain and you saw that, If I saw that I would do the same. I know you baby, I do. Don’t apologise for it” I hate myself, I actually doubted him “we can’t help that we too sexy, you know that right?” I giggled resting my head on his shoulder.

Scratching the side of my face as I blew the smoke out from my lips, I don’t have anything to prove to people but I like Sofia to see that I am proud of her and she is my girl. I ain’t angry at the situation but I want her to feel secure, placing the blunt between my lips tapping the picture of Sofia when we went to Miami on her birthday, I like these pictures because it’s a start of something new and it was like that feeling was there. She looked beautiful on her birthday so you know, I am posting it. Typing in the caption ‘I was feeling her from start, Miami for her 25th. Look at my baby smile’ pressing send, moving the blunt back. It’s funny because a lot of niggas on here and girls didn’t know I am engaged so it’s like what? And congratulations, I am blessed with Sofia so much. I will post one more picture and then I am done, I am not hiding Sofia but I just don’t want niggas feeling on my girl either. I am going to post this, when she fell asleep with Cartier in arms. She was so tired, tapping on the picture and captioning the picture ‘I know none y’all niggas bitches look this pretty while asleep’ pressing send, I got up from the seat outside. I am outside because I wanted a blunt so I had to stay outside.

“You came back, finally” Sofia said, pulling the dining chair back “I know, I was having a blunt outside, young king” touching Cartier’ cheek “y’all scare me” walking around the dining table “nigga bye, I just wanted my friend to air it out. It’s not good to keep it in is it?” sitting down on the chair on opposite side “I get it but she could just come and talk to me” which I wish she did “but we needed receipts before we attack you” Olivia is something else “y’all really ride for Sofia and I get it, she is loved and that is what she needs. I am not cheating or anything, I adore Sofia a lot. I get it, I get why she reacted like that. She knows me, I know she does. She knows when I am going through stuff, I don’t do feelings but like, look at her. How can I not?” Sofia just giggled, as she does “she’s ok” Mia waved her off “but like I don’t want you to think we are against you but Sofia is not vocal at all, she has to be pushed. She is a soft hearted girl and she gets hurt so easily. She walked in and she cried so of course we was like you need to deal with it. I said it to her, I goes a nigga that washes your hair is for life, I knew it” I wish Sofia doesn’t tell everyone that “but y’all can fuck after, can we start wedding prep? Get a date at least” I guess I am going to need to do this.

I liked the sound of sex actually, I am glad Mia said that “ok listen to me, Cassius. You have been too quiet. You need to go suit shopping, you need to get the theme right. Sofia what colour?” I shrugged, let Sofia choose “well who are your best men?” Sofia asked “just Kyle” I ain’t having nobody else “ok, I think grey. Get a grey suit. I don’t mind grey or blue ok” Mia ticked something on her paper “so we found a venue, it’s about ten thousand to just hire and a coordinator, then you adding the rest. So could be more” I shrugged “anything for you Sofia, I mean there won’t be many of my side coming. I mean nobody. I don’t think anyways” Sofia sighed out “Jasmine will be” blowing out air as Sofia said that “Celine is not invited” Olivia added “that is Bryce’ mom, I am marrying Sofia what does it matter? She’s bound to be there because of family relations now” I don’t get the issue, it’s not an issue really because I don’t want her like that.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction

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