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jcbbby · 2 years

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A Chance Meeting pt.3.

Y'all. Y'ALL. Get ready. This is your warning. This is a doozy, both in content and in length. The 3rd and final part to this saga. I truly have been so overwhelmed with the love on the first two parts. I threw the first installment up on a whim, my first bit of writing on here ever, and it's been so great to have such wonderful feedback on it. Thank you for sticking with me! Also lmao, the "song" that appears in this...listen, I pulled those lyrics out of my ass. They're not a song I've or anyone else has ever written. They're corny, I know. Ignore that lol....anyway...

Synopsis: By chance, you meet the person you've admired most from afar, Jamie Campbell Bower. By luck, a friendship blossoms. Or perhaps...more? Over the course of a whirlwind week, your wildest dreams start to become reality.

Pt. 1 here. Pt. 2 here.

Warnings: Swears, alcohol, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it in real life, kids).

-11:15pm. Friday.-

You and Jamie sat next to the other at the hotel bar, elbows propped up on the flat countertop, facing each other. You sipped your glass of wine in between laughs and upbeat conversation. You felt an ease you hadn't felt in so long, like everything in your life thus far had simply been leading up to this innocuous moment in time. Jamie glanced at your empty glass in front of you.

"Would you like another? On me, of course." Jamie asked, pushing his hair back with one hand. You looked down at the glass and back at him. "If you want, I mean. No pressure. Again, not trying to get you drunk..." He put his hands up in front of him and leaned back slightly, smiling.

You laughed and lightly smacked your hand down on the bar. "You know what, why not. It's Friday night, and I played a damn good show, I earned it." You smirked.

"Absolutely!" He exclaimed, raising a hand to get the attention of the bartender. "Could we get another glass, please? Cheers, mate. Thanks." The bartender nodded and grabbed a bottle to pour into your glass.

"I know I keep saying it Jamie, but really, thank you so much for coming to the show. I mean, you've truly been such a huge inspiration for me, and I've been a fan of your music for years. It's just so mind-blowing to think you've heard music I've written." You looked down as you took a sip of your fresh glass of wine.

"Aw, Y/N...you wonderful girl." he tilted his head, with a smile that reached his eyes. "That means so much, love. I'm so honored to have been even a sliver of inspiration to music as great as yours. Thank you. And you know, you're going places, I'm sure of it." He smiled and placed his hand over yours on the counter.

You glanced down at his hand on yours, and then up to meet his gaze. Your heart raced and you felt your face flush as you smiled, your eyes tilting slightly downward as you nearly let tears well up. Before this week, you never saw yourself getting out of your current station in life. It was hard to believe in yourself, and believe you were talented enough to achieve what you wanted. But sitting here, as Jamie of all people told you he believed in you, it felt like a dream. For even just a moment, you believed in yourself too.

"Thank you, Jamie. I just...I can't thank you enough." You shook your head, still unsure if this had all just been a very long dream. You took another sip from your glass.

"You know, I've actually started writing a new song since I've been here. It's not finished yet, but perhaps you'd like to hear it? I mean, you've so generously shared your music with me, it's only fair I do the same, right?" He smirked.

Your eyes widened as your lips parted into a toothy smile. "Are you kidding?! Oh my god, yeah I'd love to hear it!"

He chuckled. "Alright, grab your drink, love. Let's go up to my room, I've got my guitar with me."

You nodded and obliged, picking up your glass and scooting yourself off the bar seat. You followed him toward the elevator, wondering what you were about to hear. Riding up to the 19th floor of the hotel, he held his arm in front of him as the doors opened, allowing you to step out first. He then took the lead down the hall, halting outside a door. He rummaged around his pockets for a few seconds, before pulling out a key and tapping it to the door, it making the door click unlocked. He opened and held the door for you as you entered the large suite.

"Wow, they really put you up well, huh?" You glanced around. Items of clothing and bags were scattered throughout the room. Not a mess, but enough to make the room look lived in for several days.

Jamie chuckled. "Oh, yeah... Accommodations are often a surprise when they're booked by PR team. Sometimes they're tiny little rooms, other times they're like a castle. I'm always happiest with something in between, like this." He bent down to open his guitar case.

You sat on the end of the bed, watching him remove the beautiful light amber acoustic guitar from it's case. He turned to sit on the armrest of the sofa, across from you, with one leg up on the sofa cushion to rest the guitar on his thigh, as the other leg remained stretched out down to the floor. Sliding a guitar pick off the coffee table and into his hand, he quickly tuned the instrument. You watched him thinking to yourself how good he looked holding that guitar, his hair falling into his face, his long fingers over the strings.

"Okay..." He shifted himself slightly, pushing the hair behind his ear, and cleared his throat. "Like I said, it's not finished yet. So don't judge too harshly." He smirked.

He began playing, plucking a sweet and simple tune. You instinctively smiled as he started singing. His voice soft and deep, warm and passionate. He sang with a controlled, quiet intensity, his eyes looking down at the guitar, as his fingers slow danced across the fretboard. You listened to the lyrics he crooned, trying to get a feel for what the song was about. As you listened, your eyes welled up slightly, feeling goosebumps ripple across your skin.

"She longs for more in life But if she could only see She's got the whole world in her eyes And she amazes me Each time she smiles Or glances over at me I can hear the heavens cry And I just want to make her mine"

He went on for a bit longer, before he started to trail off. He looked up at you, for the first time since he started the song.

"That's all I've got so far..." he smiled sheepishly.

"Jamie, that...was beautiful. I loved it." You brought your hands up, placing them against your chest, over your heart.

"Thank you, love." He held his shy smile.

He got up off the sofa and bent down to lay the guitar back into it's case. Closing the top of the case, he came to sit next to you on the bed. There was a few seconds of a heavy feeling silence before you turned and opened your mouth to speak.

"I um...I really wish you didn't have to leave tomorrow." You placed a hand on his leg, not even realizing.

"I know, darling. I would love to stay even just a day longer. It's been great here." He looked into your eyes.

"I've just, had the best time of my life getting to know you. I feel so lucky." You let out a breathy laugh.

Jamie smiled and placed his hand on top of yours, both resting on his thigh. "I've felt so lucky getting to know you as well, Y/N." He paused for just a beat. "You know...if I'm being honest, that song was largely inspired by you." His thumb began ever so slightly caressing the top of your hand.

You blushed, your heart beginning to race, a surge of electricity running through your blood. "Me? Oh, Jamie...you sweetheart, I don't know what to say." you held his gaze, biting your bottom lip slightly as you smiled.

"I really like you, Y/N." Jamie said, as both of you started to lean in slightly.

You felt like you could combust at any moment. Is this really happening right now? You thought.

"I- I really...like you too." You stuttered, trying to comprehend what was happening.

Jamie broke eye contact, looking down to take both of your hands in his. You looked down as well, following his hands with your eyes as they enveloped yours. You both looked back up at each other. You hoped he couldn't feel how fast your pulse was going.

"Y/N...can I kiss you?" Jamie asked, his eyes full of longing.

You blinked a few times and swallowed, trying to not let the surge or energy you felt building in your body come out from your mouth in whatever way it was trying to escape. You bring your eyes back to center, looking into his and nod. "...yes."

He gave a slight smile as his eyes diverted downward towards your mouth. He brought a hand up to cup your cheek. Slowly, he leaned into you, his lips softly pressing into yours. The kiss was quick, breaking after a few seconds. He leaned his forehead against yours. You felt an energy building between the two of you, almost like a magnetic pull. You breathed a few times, feeling that energy begin to pulsate, and before either of you could say anything, you found yourself crashed against each other's lips again. This time, a raw hunger seemed to engulf the both of you. His lips parted, his tongue asking for entrance, which you allowed. Your arms reached to him, and his to you, hands grabbing at the other's bodies, trying to pull them closer.

Jamie began pushing your jacket up over your shoulders, revealing the tank top you were wearing beneath it. He moved his head down after letting the jacket fall to the floor, leaving love bites on your neck and on your collarbone. You moaned sweetly as his teeth and lips moved over your skin, your hand traveling up his back and into his blonde locks. Jamie's hand began to make it's way under your tank top, caressing your waist, inching closer to your breasts. He stopped just before taking your left breast in his hand.

"Is this okay?" He asked against your neck, placing a kiss just under your ear.

"Yes...I want you, Jamie..." You breathed out, as his hand moved up under your bra and began massaging. His mouth ventured back up to yours as he started making circles with his thumb around your nipple. You moaned slightly against his kiss, breaking it for just a few seconds as you quickly removed the tank top. Your lips met again, Jamie's hands wrapping around your back to unclasp your bra. You then began inching his shirt up, asking without words to remove it. He leaned away to allow you to bring the shirt over his head, revealing his tattoos, and toss it to the side.

He took you in his arms, laying you down on your back. He laid against you, pressing your shirtless top halves against each other, skin to skin. He went back to your breasts, beginning to suck on one nipple while his thumb moved back and forth across the other, then switching, making sure to give ample and equal attention to each.

Once he felt satisfied with his work, he reached for the button of your jeans, looking up at you for assurance. You nodded as he looked back down, undoing the button and zipper, continuing to plant kisses down your thigh as he slid your jeans over them. Letting them fall to the floor, he leaned back in, kissing and gently biting your thigh as he played with the hem of your panties. Twisting his pointer fingers around either side of the fabric, he began sliding them down, revealing your whole body now to him.

"You're so fucking stunning." He said breathlessly, taking a moment to take every part of you in, before leaning over, planting kisses from just under your chest, back down to your thigh.

He glanced up at you, eyes full of admiration, before bring his hands to your thighs. He gently parted them, bringing his mouth to your heat. Your breath hitched, as you felt his tongue working on you, working some kind of magic. You let out a moan, as he smiled against you.

"Jamie..." you breathed, and tried to stifle another moan, suddenly acutely aware of being in a hotel and having neighbors in nearby rooms.

Jamie looked up suddenly. "No, you let it out babe. I want to hear you." He smirked.

He took this opportunity to slip a finger inside, bringing his tongue back against you, immediately doing the come hither motion with his finger. Your hips began to buck against him, and your hands quickly buried themselves in his hair as your head flew backward against the pillows. Your moans grew louder as he slipped in another finger and began pumping. You felt your pleasure building up in your stomach as Jamie continued. Before you could let yourself come undone, your hands brought Jamie's face back up to yours, as you pushed your lips against his, his face moistened by you.

You reached down and began fumbling with his belt. He smiled against your lips, before leaning back on to his knees to assist you in removing his trousers. He rolled over on to his back to kick them and his boxers off, before rolling back on top of you. He hovered briefly, forehead pressed against yours, before lining himself up and slowly pushing inside of you. You both moaned as he let you adjust to his length. He sighed as he leaned back in, wasting no time pushing his tongue into your mouth, as he began to thrust.

Like he had asked of you, you were not shy in verbally encouraging him. You probably wouldn't have been able to if you tried to keep quiet, the man sure knew what he was doing.

"Fuck...oh fuck...you feel so good baby." Jamie breathed in your ear as he picked up his pace.

In a quick shuffle, he propped himself on his knees, lifting your legs up, holding them at a 90 degree angle in his arms to give him leverage, as he continued. This position allowed him to hit exactly where you needed it to.

"Oh shit...fuck..." Your back arched as you gripped the sheets. "Just like that...mmm..."

You could feel yourself tensing around him as he kept going. He would change up the pace, going from hard and fast, to slow and deep, and it was driving you wild. You felt your pleasure reaching it's peak. "Fuck...Jamie, I...oh god..." You moaned as your legs began to shake.

"Hold on, darling..." Jamie whispered, between grunts. "I want to look at you."

He lowered your legs to either side of him, bringing his hands behind your back, and lifted you up toward him. His legs stretched out under you, so that you were facing each other, his hands supporting your lower back as you both continued to rock your hips in rhythm with the other. Your arms rested on his shoulders as you both looked into each other's eyes. With a couple more thrusts, you felt yourself come undone, seeing white as you threw your head back in ecstasy.

"That's it, baby..." Jamie moaned, loving the show you were giving him.

You fell forward into him as your arms wrapped tighter around his neck, riding out your high. Within seconds he also reached his release, tightly wrapping his arms around your waist, moaning next to your ear. The two of you were left clinging to the other as your movements slowed down, leaving you both breathing heavily, in a haze of bliss. You smiled into his neck, gently placing a soft kiss. Jamie carefully laid the both you back on the bed, taking you in his arms and holding you against his chest, caressing your shoulder. He took in a deep breath and let it out with a content sigh, before kissing the top of your head.

"You're amazing." Jamie said, leaning his head against yours.

You smiled as you began tracing his skull tattoo. "You're not too bad yourself." You smirked.

You laid together, intertwined for a few moments. You were tired, but at the same time, the most awake you've ever been. Slightly zoned out, blissed out, still letting your finger explore the lines of his chest art, Jamie spoke and brought you back down to earth.

"You should come see me in LA soon." He smiled, softly playing with your fingers.

You smiled back. "I think I would love that." You paused, your smile fading just slightly. "Jamie...this isn't just going to be some hook up thing, is it?" You looked into his eyes, slight concern taking over your face.

Jamie now took your hand firmly in his and brought it to his lips, kissing it, before squeezing you tighter against him, placing his head in the crook of your neck.

"No, darling. No, I have a feeling this is the start of something truly beautiful." He whispered.

*************************************************

THE END. The rest is up for your imagination. :)

Thank you SO MUCH for sticking around and for all the overwhelming love on this. I hope this final part was sufficient for you! I appreciate every single person who liked, reblogged, interacted with any of these posts. I wish the world for you. <3

People who asked to be tagged: @nyleen @nograce-nomercy @dark-academia-slut

#jamie campbell bower #jamie campbell bower imagine #jamie campbell bower x reader #jamie campbell bower x you #jamie bower #jamie campbell bower fanfic #001 stranger things #henry creel #a chance meeting #vecna #jcb #peter ballard

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kvetchinglyneurotic · 6 months

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Do you have a process with your writing? It’s so good

Thank you! In practice it's not quite as neatly divided into steps, but the writing process basically looks like this:

Step 1: an idea approaches

I'm going about my day when suddenly I'm struck by a scene, a bit of dialogue, or — and these are usually specific to original fic ideas — a setting/magic system/historical event. Fanfic ideas can also come from questions about canon: The Hedgehog's Dilemma started with me asking myself 1) how Jamie would react to something like Wembley in season 1, and 2) how the relationship he's shown to have with Georgie in season 3 fits with what he says/is implied about it at the ghost bonfire.

Step 2: the world and characters

This step is definitely a bigger part of the writing process for original fic — this is where I flesh out the setting, the history, cultures, laws, and magic systems, draw the maps, create broad strokes character profiles, ect. — but it is also part of the writing process for fanfics, although it usually happens concurrent with or after step 3. The fanfic version is basically making a note of the timeline, coming up with or deciding on an interpretation of character backstories (depending on how much canon evidence there is), and just generally making sure I have a clear idea of who everyone is, what motivates them, how they see the world, ect.

Step 3: plot and character arcs

Before I start outlining, I let the fic percolate in my mind for a couple of days. If it didn't already happen during ideas phase, this is when I figure out what I'm trying to say thematically and get a sense of how the handful of scenes or the premise I have floating around would fit into a story. Once I have the main plot beats, and ending, and character arcs for the leads, it's outlining time.

Step 4: turn step 3 into an outline

If I already have a pretty good idea of the plot, I just get right to it and write all the scenes into a checklist, which is divided by chapters if it's not a one-shot. If I'm still working out some of the finer plotpoints, I write out everything I have so far in a list and then break that down into scenes. My outlines are usually general descriptions of a scene with notes on dialogue or the characters' emotions, and I'm not really strict about following it as I write, although I will go back and rework the outline if things are really going in a different direction than anticipated.

Step 5: write

For me, a lot of writing is about momentum: I enjoy it when I'm doing it regularly but I have a hard time getting back into it if I've taken a break, so I try to write every day, which I accomplish this by having a very low daily goal of 300 words. I'll often write more than that, but it's low enough to feel achievable when I'm busy or tired or just don't feel like it. Otherwise, my writing process is just to go through my outline in order and check off scenes as they're done.

Step 6: edit 😕

When I write fiction, I'll usually edit a chapter once or maybe twice before I post it. In my academic life, however, a solid 40% of the writing process is just editing, so here's how I do that in case anyone is looking for an editing process:

The read through: after I finish writing, I let it sit for a day if I have time, then read the entire thing. I'll usually fix minor grammar/spelling mistakes just to keep myself paying attention, but the goal here is to make note of structural problems. Is there a natural flow between scenes/ideas? Are there any parts that are repetitive or extraneous or, alternatively, is there anything missing?

Structural edit: fix the things I noticed on the read through.

Repeat steps 1 and 2 until I'm satisfied

Line edit: this is where I clean up the writing itself — spelling, grammar, making sure there's variation in sentence structure and word choice, ect.

#asks #writing advice #i know writing out of order works really well for a lot of people but alas i am not one of them #kvetch oc

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troubatrain · 3 years

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want you to want me - m. tkachuk

a/n: i’m awful at intros but this fic is my whole ass child. i started it months ago and i picked it up back and then i just couldn’t stop writing. now we’re at a whopping 10k words and i’m really happy with the way this one came out. i hope you guys like it as much as i loved writing it.

big thanks to @hookingminor @igor-shestyorkin & @tkafuckit for reading this as i wrote it and gassing me up ily all sm

warnings: smut

You were Matthew’s dream girl, and you didn’t have a fucking clue. You were leaning against the cold metal bleachers of your former high school, chatting with whatever teacher probably wanted to hear all about that shiny NWSL contract you signed right out of college with the Chicago Red Stars. It was well deserved, a few national titles in college put you in the position in the first place, and Matthew respected the hell out of you. You wouldn’t know, by the way he never seems like he actually wants to speak to you and the few snide remarks about your sport in general. That started forever ago, when Matthew royally fucked up any chance he had with you later in life because he was a competitive asshole.

It started when you were twelve, and middle school was nothing short of a mess. Matthew was growing into his own, adding a near foot to his height over one summer while his father and coaches doted on the fact that he was getting bigger. Getting bigger meant getting better, and for a few years winning was the most important thing in the world. But, becoming a hormonal preteen came with something else, feelings about the girl who sat three rows behind him in almost all of his classes.

Then third period gym class came around, and Matthew was a competitive monster. The kind of kid who took that way too seriously, and you accidentally became public enemy number one. You were the only person in his class who could even come close to beating him at anything, because you were just as much of an athlete as he was. Soccer had become your craft, and much like Matthew, you declared you’d go pro one day. So, Matthew did what any other insecure twelve year old boy would, he teased you relentlessly. It was awful, but by the time Matthew had gone off to play for the National team you had forgotten about his bullshit.

Apparently, you’d done something in a past life to warrant dealing with Matthew for longer than you ever anticipated. Jamie was your little sister, and Taryn’s best friend. Best friend was probably understatement, the pair were inseparable on and off the field. They trained together, they played on the same teams and that meant way too much time with the rest of the Tkachuk’s. You learned quickly, that the rest of their family was wonderful and Matthew seemed to be too thick headed to fall in line.

You tolerated Matthew, brushing his silly remarks off just like you did when you were younger. The thing was, Matthew didn’t want you to just tolerate him, but he didn’t know how to get you to stop hating him. You make your way over to Matthew who’d been standing next to his brother since the start of your sister’s game.

“Hi Brady,” You greet, tapping Brady on the shoulder who pulled you into a bone crushing hug. That annoyed Matthew the most, the way you seemed to love his siblings and despise him. In your defense, nobody was more supportive of your professional career than Brady, who’d made a promise to catch a game the second he could, “Hi Matthew.”

You were waiting for something from Matthew, an acknowledgement for finally achieving a dream of yours. You’d gotten the congratulations from the rest of his family, a massive celebration because Keith thought you deserved it. Matthew probably didn’t think you did. You could practically hear his smug little voice about how much his recently inked contract was compared to yours, because you’d heard it since you were kids. He used to rip on your athletic abilities every chance he could, something about how it didn’t matter how hard you could kick a ball you couldn’t hold a hockey stick so he was just better.

“You’re here!” You hear the chipper voice of your little sister approach, Jamie’s sweaty postgame arms wrapped around your waist. You’d been in Chicago, signing some paperwork and looking into finding a place to stay when you had to go for camp. You promised you’d make it back in time, and your flight landed less than five hours ago but you made it.

Matthew bit the inside of his cheek to keep his smile to himself, watching his own sister push past him to see you. Taryn loved you, because sometimes she just needed a big sister and her brothers were in another country most

of the time. It was the part that killed him the most, seeing you with his family. You fit right in, a fierce athlete with drive that rivaled his own. Brady side-eyed his own brother, watching him instead of the scene unfolding in front of him. He was frustrated with his own brother for not just telling you the truth, that he teased you because he was an idiot who didn’t know how to handle having a crush on you.

But Brady was going to do it himself if his brother didn’t.

***

Matt, you don’t have a girlfriend right?

Matthew knew damn well he should not have answered his sister’s question, but when he realized her best friend had been sitting right next to her in the kitchen, his curiosity got the best of him. So he did, telling his sister he was single and sparing her details of any of the girls he’d gone on dates with the past year. That was his life is Calgary, a constant revolving door so no one would see what was underneath layers of sarcasm and angst. But every summer, he’d come home and wonder when he’d start to build a life for himself, and if he’d ever find that person to do it with. That was when his brain would start to wander, fantasies of a future that always seemed to involve you. He loved to imagine it, the years that you’d both spend supporting the other’s dream. Matthew would do anything to make sure you achieved yours, and he thought you’d do the same. Then you’d both settle down, the big house with the white picket fence and a shiny ring on your finger Matthew put there himself and years of arguing about what sport your future children would play - he’d even consider letting you have just one.

Unfortunately, none of that could be real until he figured out how to get you to hate him less. Taryn apparently had the same idea, and had been scheming with your sister for months. The two girls were looking at Matthew with devilish grins on their faces, like whatever they came up with would totally work.

“Y/N doesn’t have a boyfriend,” Your sister hums, sipping the smoothie they forced Matthew to drive them to go get, “It’s sad actually-”

“We think you should date,” Taryn explains, Matthew’s eyes went wide. His sister didn’t know the whole story, or just how far back this stupid fued went. Taryn always loved you, so Matthew just kept his remarks to himself.

“I know you know Y/N doesn’t like me very much,” Matthew explains, “So tell me how that’s going to work.”

“Apologize to her, if she can forgive me for anything she’ll forgive you,” Jamie sighs, thinking of all the times you’d shown her mercy when she didn’t deserve it.

“You’ve got to be sorry,” Brady interrupts, mouth full of food while he goes to go look for more in the fridge. He turns around, Matthew’s eyes giving him daggers, “What? You were a dick to her for years, you’ve got to fix that first.”

It didn’t take much convincing after that, Taryn had already planned out what Matthew should say to you. Matthew wasn’t going to repeat those words, because he knew exactly what he’d say to you if he ever got the chance. He was trying to fix his past, because the way he acted towards you was the one thing he regrets.

So with the help of your little sister and the Find my Friends app, Matthew was pulling up to a soccer field he’d been to plenty of times. He used to run through the park nearby, catching a glimpse of your practices when you were in high school and Matthew was an afterthought. He hops out of his car, smiling when he could see you running drills alone. You were dribbling the ball, counting to yourself while you were weaving through cones you set up.

“I’ve never been good at those,” Matthew calls out, walking over to you while you stopped and caught your breath, “I kick the cones with my skate every single time.”

“Maybe you’re not as good as you think you are,” You tease, grabbing your water and guzzling it down, “What are you doing here?”

“I, uh, I came to apologize?” Matthew admits, knowing his face was probably bright red. He was nervous, the good kind like he got before a big game, “I was just an insecure kid then, and you didn’t deserve what I did just because I was afraid you’d beat in something.”

Matthew left out the part where he felt like he was still that kid all the time. All of those insecurities about himself seemed to be picked up by every reporter in Canada when he was there. You bit your lip, pretending like you were trying to debate whether or not you should forgive Matthew at all. In reality, you would have forgiven him ages ago if he’d just apologized sooner. It was so long ago, and sometimes you thought Matthew’s constant taunting made you better. He was pleading, baby blue eyes staring at you sadly while he waited for your answer. He looked like he didn’t think he deserved to be forgiven, shoulders slumped while he tried to read your body language. It was something you noticed about Matthew forever ago, he could have everything in the world but when he looked at you he seemed almost sad.

“I mean I could forgive you, but only if you beat me,” You cross your arms, raising an eyebrow at Matthew, “If I win, I don’t have to and if you win all is forgiven.”

“Really? Isn’t that why we were in this situation to begin with?” Matthew points out, crossing his arms at you.

“I thought you weren’t that kid anymore,” You remind of his own words, testing him to see if he’d put his money where his mouth was. Matthew smirks, chuckling to himself, “C’mon Tkachuk let’s see what you got.”

Matthew shook his head, laughing and lining up next to you. You both counted to three, sprinting down the field at full force. Matthew knew his height was the only thing working to his advantage while he tried to keep up with you. You were nearing your finish line, and Matthew didn’t think he was going to win. You were going to forgive him regardless, but Matthew didn’t know that. His arms stretched out, grabbing your waist and pulling you into his chest. Matthew turned his body around, stepping over the line before you did.

“God, you’re such a fucking cheater Matthew,” You hit his chest, Matthew’s hands still firmly placed on your hips.

“I didn’t want to lose,” Matthew admits, all of his smug attitude diminishing immediately, “Just want you to forgive me.”

“I’ll forgive you if you never pull that shit on me again,” You poke his chest, slipping out of his grip and running to your stuff before he could notice how nervous he was making you.

No. Absolutely not. You told yourself while you checked your phone, rolling your eyes at the warning text from Jamie that Matthew was on his way, you couldn’t have anything but indifference to Matthew Tkachuk. It got harder everytime you saw him, the past few years had been nothing short of kind to him, he was growing from a dumb immature boy to a man more and more every summer. You turn around, peeking at Matthew who was sitting down and catching his breath, a winning smile on his face, the same kind he had the very first time he schooled everyone at floor hockey in middle school.

Maybe you could be friends.

***

Matthew liked having you as a friend, mostly because as of right now that was all he was going to get. You definitely didn’t trust him, which was valid considering Matthew had been a dick to you for years, but he was working on it. He had to, that uncontrollable feeling that he cared about you was getting harder to shove back down with every year that passed.

“You’re friends now, you don’t need to stare at her like a creep anymore,” Brady scoffs, watching his brother gawk at you from afar. Matthew couldn’t help it, you just had a glow about you, you always did, but somehow in the summer you were golden. Tonight you looked even better, maybe it’s because you smiled at him when he walked instead of scowling like you usually did.

“He’s in love with you,” Steph giggles, sipping her drink and giving Matthew a side eye, “He’s been staring at you all night.”

“He apologized to me,” You confess, holding in that little secret about Matthew’s visit to the field even from your best friend. You had the same friends, the same group of people who’d been pushing the two of you to work it out for years. It wasn’t that you didn’t want them to know that they no longer had to worry about one of you blowing up because the other was there, you just wanted everyone to let it go too. Matthew deserved a little forgiveness, you could only imagine the pressure he felt on himself back then, and while he didn’t totally deserve your protection - you were going to give it to him, “Don’t-”

“Oh wonder why, I know it’s because he looooves you,” Steph teases, “Did you forgive him?”

“Yeah I mean we’re both older and I’d like to think he’s wiser, and besides our parents are way too close,” You knew this was going to be your excuse for a while. It was better for everyone that you forgave him, Jamie and Taryn spent more time together than you’d spend with anyone and you're just as close with the rest of their family. It wasn’t untrue that it was in fact for the best, but that didn’t mean Matthew’s stupid dimples didn’t persuade you before you could think about anyone else, “Can we stop talking about this?”

Matthew’s eyes didn’t leave you once that night, especially after the way Steph downed tequila shots and convinced you to join her. You deserved to celebrate, you’d accomplished something Matthew knew was your biggest dream because it was the same as his. He was proud of you, not that he’d gotten a chance to show it.

“If you’re going to go pro Y/N, you’ve got to start keeping up,” Brady chirps, watching you stumble over your own feet to walk over to him and Matthew. Matthew had seen this once before, a level of drunkenness where you turned into bambi but that was so long ago he never thought he’d see it again.

“I’ll go pro in beating your ass Brady,” You snap back, shooting daggers over Brady who was already cracking up, “Hi Matthew.”

“Hi,” Matthew’s voice was small, a weird sound considering he was usually the loudest in the room. Brady scoffs, walking away from the two of you before he snaps at how hopelessly in love his brother was. You turn your head in confusion, your mind far too hazy to realize why Brady was so annoyed in the first place, causing Matthew to chuckle, “Want to play? Might be best if we’re on the same team.”

Matthew’s thumb shot over to the beer pong set up on the other side of the room, a mischievous smirk on face, “I mean if it’s for the best.”

Matthew’s arm wrapped around your shoulders holding you close to his chest while you both played pong was definitely not for the best, and it wasn’t helping that stupid crush you had on him. You could feel Steph’s stare from the corner of the room, and you look at her to mouth a don’t at her. It was nice having Matthew on your team, finally a moment where instead of arguing with each other about who’s elbow was clearly over the table - you got to do the same thing to Brady.

“Brady you’re cheating,” You call out, Matthew’s head thrown back in laughter at your seriousness.

“You heard her Brady, elbows over the table,” Matthew breathes out, his body still rumbling with laughter at his little brother’s expense.

“Oh look at you two, you’re just gonna raise some winners one day aren’t you?” Brady chirps back, both happy to see you getting along and annoyed once he realizes that means he was going to get roasted by both of you now. You felt heat rush to your cheeks, tucking your face into Matthew’s arm in hopes no one saw the way you shrunk at that stupid joke.

“We’re winners right now,” Matthew calls out, his last ball landing in the cup and sealing the game for the two of you. Matthew would raise winners with you, it was something he thought about from time to time, but those thoughts were never going to see the light of day, “Alright drunky I think it’s time to get you home.”

“You can stay, I’ll just catch a ride with someone,” You waive Matthew off, who shook his head no at you before you even started speaking.

“One, my dad would kick my ass if he knew I left you,” Matthew starts with, holding up one finger with another on the way, “Two, we’re friends now and I’d like to make sure you don’t die before you see a pro game.”

Matthew had seen you this drunk before, but what he didn’t know was that getting you home would be more difficult than he thought. You started in the direction of your house, but apparently you were a runner and a speedy one at that. Now you were barely two blocks away from Matthew’s parents place and if he could at least get you there he’d be able to call it a night - which wasn’t fucking easy.

“Alright I’ve had enough,” Matthew huffs, jogging to catch up with you and scooping you into his arms. You were hanging over his shoulder, Matthew making his way down the street with the house in his sightline. You could have cared less, laughing your ass off while Matthew walked up the stairs and finally placed you back down on your feet, “Be quiet, go up to my room and get some clothes and go sleep in the guest room.”

You weren’t quiet, not at all and Matthew was amazed not one of his parents came down to see what all the chaos was about. After Matthew had to walk you up the stairs, running back down for some water and hoping you weren’t a disaster by the time he got back - he found you in his bed. You were curled up right in the middle, an old London Knights shirt on your body, Matthew’s favorite. Matthew grabs his comforter, throwing it over your body. He sighs, leaning against his door frame and smiling to himself at how comfortable you looked, flicking off the light and retreating to the guest room.

Matthew hated the guest room. He hated how hard the mattress was and after a few hours of no sleep and tossing and turning - he gave up. Matthew hoped no one else was up, but not to his surprise his mother was already in the kitchen, and judging by the look on her face, she knew who was upstairs.

“Care to explain?” Chantal smirks, raising her eyebrows at her son. Matthew’s face got red, his landing on the back of his neck to cover the blush.

“She fell asleep before I could even get her to the guest room,” Matthew shrugs, hoping his mom wouldn’t push it any further, “I, uh, apologized the other day.”

“Good,” Chantal hums, a knowing look on her face. She didn’t like to push Matthew, her one kid who seemed to be a little rougher around the edges than the others, but that silly feud never sat right with her, “Here, bring her a coffee, I’m sure she needs it.”

Matthew nods, grabbing the mug his mother was holding out and starting to make his way up the stairs. He heard the tell her you made it from his mother and shook his head. He knew what she was thinking, especially with the way Chantal seemed to talk about you. His mother thought you were nothing short of perfect, and Matthew would be a liar if he didn’t think the same thing.

“Did I fall asleep here?” You’d woken up confused, your question only answered by the jerseys hanging on the walls, you were in Matthew’s room. You rub your eyes, the door creaking open way too loudly for how dead you felt.

“Only after you almost fell down the stairs and ran three blocks in the wrong direction,” Matthew chuckles, sitting on the edge of the bed and handing you the mug, “You know you’re fast right?”

“Yeah,” You muse, smirking to yourself and taking a sip of coffee, “I’m sorry I did that to you, and stole your bed - I can go.”

Matthew stopped you, telling to finish your coffee and relax and he’d drive you home after. You fell into a comfortable conversation, something Matthew never thought would happen.

And watching you walk up to your steps in his shirt still wasn’t something he thought he’d see, but it was better than he imagined.

***

“Hey it’s Jamie, can’t get to the phone right now…”

You groan, tossing your phone onto your bed and continuing your pace around the room. It was well after midnight, and your sister had been out all night, and past her curfew. Usually you’d cover for her, definitely taking the prize home for the cool older sister who picks her siblings and their friends up from parties. That’s what had you so worried. Sure, Jamie was a teenager and she snuck in a few little white lies with your parents just like you’d done, but Jamie always told you the truth. She’d check in with you more than her parents, letting you know that she’s going to be out late but she’s safe and if she needed anything she knew who to call. You texted sometime around ten, just checking in since it was Saturday and you were sure she had a more riveting social life than yourself. No answer. Then eleven rolled around and you didn’t hear anything, so naturally you double texted and now it’s twelve thirty and you still haven’t heard anything. You cross your arms, looking at your phone as if you could will an answer into existence. You grab it, dialing a number you weren’t even sure would work.

“Hello?” Matthew’s voice appeared on the other side of the line, clear confusion in his voice. You let out a sigh of relief, hoping Matthew would have the answer you wanted to hear so desperately.

“Is my sister at your house?” You ask, biting your lip and throwing on a pair of sweats so you could pick her up and murder her for scaring you like that. You were sure it was innocent, Jamie slept over at Taryn’s all the time, staying up way too late watching movies or when Jamie would hide going to a party from your much stricter parents.

Matthew tells you to give him a minute, and you can hear him walking through the house. By the time you heard a door open and a small fuck under his breath, your stomach dropped, “She was supposed to be home by midnight.”

“Alright, thanks anyways,” You sigh, “Do you know where they might have gone? It’s just, Jamie hasn’t answered me in hours and she usually does even if she’s out past curfew and I’m just-”

“I’ll be at your house in ten,” Matthew says, his keys alright in his hand and his foot halfway out the door. He was more mad than worried, sure his sister was out a party past curfew. Matthew was her biggest brother, and he was far more protective over her than Brady ever could be. He hated when she did this, and Matthew was pissed. You waited on your steps, Matthew car coming into view while you sprung up and practically sprinted into his car.

“You look mad,” You observe, as if it wasn’t completely obvious. You knew why, trying countless times to remind Taryn that her brother loves her and that’s why he’s like that. You thought he could go a little easier on her, but you wouldn’t dare get in the middle of that.

“I am mad,” Matthew grits out, knuckles white on his steering wheel while he drives slowly down the street. You just drove, in hopes you’d find what was obviously a house party and hopes your sisters were inside. You squint, hoping your eyes weren’t fooling you.

“Wait, pull over I think I see my neighbor,” You yell, Matthew’s foot flying on the break and you hop out. You were right, the bright orange tuft of hair you saw was like a miracle, “Hey Henry have you seen my sister?”

“Oh yeah I think she’s still inside,” Henry points to the house behind him, music blasting and a party in full swing, “I think she’s with Taryn.”

Matthew hops out of the car, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the house with him. Matthew’s fingers were laced with yours with every step he took, weaving through the crowd in hopes you’d see them. It took three bedrooms and a laundry room until you finally saw Taryn standing in the doorway. Her eyes went wide, and you pushed past them both to see Jamie with her head in the toilet. She was fine, well she was definitely in deep shit, but it wasn’t the worst thing to stumble upon. You throw her hair up, your attention moving to Matthew yelling at his sister in the hallway.

“Why didn’t you call someone,” Matthew yells, trying so damn hard to not completely snap on his baby sister. Taryn yells that her phone had died and then Jamie got sick and she didn’t know what to do. Of course they didn’t. You were probably more sympathetic, and you knew just how pissed off Matthew could get. You get up, pushing Taryn back into the bathroom and telling her to watch your sister.

“Calm down before you talk to her, please,” You plead, grabbing Matthew’s shoulders, “Besides, I sort of need some help right now.”

There it was. The very moment Matthew realized all along you could’ve been helping him. Your hands were wrapped around his biceps, a finger gently rubbing the skin right under the sleeve of his shirt. Every bit of anger disappeared from his body, a calm feeling replacing it. He knew you were right, and he’d be thankful for it later. Matthew knew he had to do the right thing by you, and he nodded, willing to follow any directions you gave him.

Matthew carried Jamie out of the house, getting both of your sisters in the car and finally heading back to your house. You knew he was still pissed off, a present frown on his face so you just took the chance. Just like he’d done before for you, you grabbed one of his hands from his steering wheel, lacing your fingers together. You caught the smile on his face, your thumb rubbing over his hand while his shoulders seemed to just relax. Once

Matthew finally helped you get Jamie inside, a night of laying on her floor to make sure she was okay ahead of you stood in the doorway with Matthew across from you.

“Thank you, I know we’re working on this friendship thing but you really didn’t have to do that,” You were eternally grateful, wrapping your arms around Matthew’s waist and tucking your head into his chest.

“You’d do the same thing for Taryn,” Matthew hums, knowing full well he definitely owed you for being Taryn’s replacement sibling with him and Brady in Canada for most of the year, “Get some rest okay?”

“Wait,” You stop Matthew, grabbing his hand one more time, “Don’t kill your sister, please she’s just a kid-”

“You’re way too easy on them,” Matthew chuckles, shaking his head at you. He knew Taryn was probably scared, and after he calmed a bit he understood where you were coming from. That didn’t mean he wasn’t going to tell her that if she ever pulls that shit again - he was going to rat her out to their parents.

And when Matthew finally got back in the car, he could see his sister’s grin in the backseat, “Don’t say it.”

She held your hand, are you sure you’re not going to malfunction now?

***

Maybe you were spiraling.

You’d been waiting for this moment your entire life, now you had a few more weeks until camp started and you were afraid. You knew you were good enough, you had to be. But what if you weren’t? You could feel the anxiety settling in, a feeling you hadn’t felt since Matthew told you soccer wasn’t a real sport in fourth grace. It’d been eating at you for weeks, deteriorating any confidence you had left in yourself. So you started pushing yourself even harder. The harder you worked the less like you were to fuck it all up. Your muscles were sore, your body was tired and it was just all becoming too much.

And Matthew noticed.

You were pushing yourself too hard, even the time you were supposed to relax with your families before your seasons started was being spent training. He understood it, the term first round exit lived rent free in his head every single time his skate hit the ice over the summer, but that didn’t make it okay. You looked tired, sluggish while you moved because you were running twice a day and training in between. And he was pissed everyone seemed to be fine with it. You should start working harder then Matthew. If it bothers you so much maybe you could join her. It wasn’t that he was jealous of your work ethic, he was worried. Matthew’s eyes followed you as you ran past his house again. The third time in one day, he’d finally decided he had enough.

Matthew took the walk to your house, charming the pants off your mother for her to tell him you were upstairs because you just got back in. He knocks twice, hearing a come in from the other side.

“What are you doing here?” You question, rolling one of your ankles that just seemed to be getting more swollen every time you started to practice. Matthew noticed it, your hands freezing one you caught his gaze.

“You’re overworking yourself,” Matthew stands his ground, he knew you could have told him to fuck off because no one hates advice they didn’t ask for quite like him, “Don’t tell me I’m wrong.”

“That’s rich coming from the kid who’s played with more broken bones than anyone I know,” You remind him of a few mistakes Matthew’s made playing through injuries he really shouldn’t, “I’m not fucking frail.”

“That’s not what this is about,” Matthew scoffs, it never once crossed his mind that he thought he was tough enough to play through injuries but you weren’t, “It’s about taking a break so you don’t get hurt.”

“I’m fine,” You huff, getting up and trying your best to hide the pain in your ankle when you stood on it. You fell forward, Matthew catching you in his arms and putting you back down the edge of your bed.

“Tell me what’s wrong?” Matthew asks with soft eyes, he bent down to take your ankle in his hand and inspect it the best he could. It was swelling, probably from the amount of pressure you’d been putting on your body with no breaks.

“What if I never score a goal?” You whisper, teary eyes finally meeting Matthew’s. His brows shot up, alarmed at how one of the best athletes he’s ever seen could feel the same way he felt right before his first NHL game. Matthew sits down next to you, hand on your thigh while you let out a cry, “What if I’m just a bust? Like I get there and nothing works and I suck.”

“You’ll score eventually,” Matthew scoffs, understanding how ridiculous you sounded but just how you felt at the same time, “Everyone does.”

“You scored like four games into your fucking career Matt,” You remind him, Matthew smiling a bit that you knew that to begin with. It would have been impossible not to know, or pretend like you didn’t keep a few tabs on his career. Matthew Tkachuk was a legend in the making, and whether or not you could feel butterflies in your stomach every time he dropped the gloves was a secret you’d take to the grave.

“I got suspended my first season too,” Matthew jokes, a teary eyed laugh escaping your lips, “I’d put down money you score in your first game.”

“Well good thing you have money to lose,” You sigh dramatically, the fear of fucking up still on your mind.

“You’ll find your groove, all legends do,” Matthew promises, throwing his arm around your shoulders. You snuggled into his side, a realization that he was becoming a comforting presence in your life with each passing day, “And if you don’t, you can always hide out in Canada with me.”

“Matty!” The same silly nickname Matthew introduced himself to you on your very first day of kindergarten slipped through your lips without realizing it. Matthew hadn’t been called that in ages, but it was welcome from you. You push his chest, “That’s not making me feel any better.”

“What if I told you the only reason I was so mean to you was because I was intimidated by how talented you were?” Matthew confesses, scratching your head with his fingers, “If I win a cup one day I think I owe you one.”

Matthew didn’t mention that in his wildest fantasies of raising that cup over his head, you were there. He’d owe you one and he hoped it was because you were there for him until he got there. Matthew saw it the same way every time, you’d tell him to go see his parents first but he’d fly right past them to get to you - the person who accidentally pushed him to be his best. He had plenty of daydreams about you winning too, remembering times you used to brag you’d go to the Olympics one day, and he hoped you were right. He wanted to see you succeed, more than anything, and he thought it would work.

“Legally you have to let me drink out of it,” You muse, shutting your eyes and letting yourself just rest against Matthew.

“It has to be Bud Light,” Matthew teases while watching you fake a gag. You grab his outstretched hand, letting him pull you up. His hands rested on the side of your face, eyes flickering to your lips for just a second. He wanted to kiss you, but he knew he had to wait. Wait for you to be ready. Wait for you to settle down. Or even just wait until he thought he had a real shot at forever.

Forever with you.

***

Matthew was kind of pissed off.

The press didn’t bother him, none of that mattered and at the end of the day Matthew was able to sleep at night knowing he was a good teammate and a decent person most of the time. This one got him though, some writer criticizing the A on his jersey, and how someone who plays like he does didn’t deserve a letter.

A letter he earned.

You could tell something was off, the way Matthew had been running alongside you was aggressive to say the least. He insisted he came with you, something about forcing you to take breaks. He was being your friend, even though your sisters seemed to disagree. Taryn’s words were replaying in your head, Matt doesn’t even care if I get hurt. That didn’t mean anything, those two had no idea what love was and Matthew caring about you a little bit didn’t mean he loved you. Besides, the way he was acting right now told a completely different story.

“Are you mad at me?” You finally slow down, sitting on a rock that was next to the hiking trail you were on.

“No?” Matthew stops dead in his tracks, his heart sinking to the pit of his stomach that he fucked this up too, “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.”

“No, tell me what’s wrong,” You push, crossing your arms and narrowing your eyes at Matthew. You could tell he was pressed about something, his neck covered in a red flush the same way it used to.

“Some stupid article about my letter, don’t worry about it,” Matthew grits, repeating his words again. His defense was up, even after you confessed to him that you were scared of not being enough.

“Get the fuck out of here with the tough guy act Matthew,” You challenge him, poking him right in the chest, “If we’re going to be friends you need to cut that shit out.”

“You really want to hear it?” Matthew barks back, fully yelling at you, “I’m tired of people thinking I don’t deserve things because I threw a few bad hits. Do you know how it feels to have everyone think you’re shitty? No you don’t, because you’re so fucking perfect that my own parents like you more than me.”

You stood there, silent while you tried to figure out how to tell him that simply wasn’t true. His entire body was shaking, the anger coursing through his veins like you’d seen many times before that. Matthew looked like he did the first time you hit a homerun in gym class, except this time it was because that same pressure never got released. You couldn’t come close to understanding the way he probably felt. You didn’t have the comparables in your own family, the constant reminders of Brady’s points tally compared to his, let alone the career his father had.

“Matty,” You whisper, grabbing his hand and running your fingers over the scars on his knuckles, “Why is this bothering you so much?”

You were sure this wasn’t the first time someone’s said he was a pest, and it sure as hell wasn’t going to be the last. Matthew sighed, the better part of his brain screaming at him to stop before he lost you too.

“I’ve felt like this forever,” Matthew whispers, eyes fixated on your hand in his, “From the moment I started getting bigger, there’s just been this pressure to play a certain way and act a certain way. I was a fucking kid, and while all of my friends got to go wherever they wanted all I ever did was practice. Then I finally get to where I wanted and I’m still getting shit on.”

“Except no one thinks you don’t deserve to be where you are,” You whisper, quiet words as if you were going to startle him, “And I know it doesn’t make up for things people say, but the people who love you think you deserve it.”

Matthew nods, pulling you into his arms and holding you close. Your arms wrapped around his waist, his words mumbled against your forehead, “I needed that.”

“I know,” You nod, smiling wide up at him, “And we need to practice more because you’re too slow, soooo catch me if you can!”

You slipped out of his arms, running away with a giggle and a smile. Matthew stopped for a second, his Neanderthal brain checking out your ass while you jogged away and his more logical one trying to process what just happened.

But what mattered most was that whatever you did worked and that meant something to Matthew.

***

Just admit you think he’s hot.

You wanted to kill your sister for making this weekend harder than it had to be. You were doing a good job at just friends with Matthew until Jamie was curled up in your bed while you packed for a lake trip with your friends. She pushed it for hours, rambling on about Matthew is actually your type and Taryn swears he’d be a good boyfriend if someone just understood him. The problem was, you were starting to see her point. Matthew had a glow up a few years ago, like one summer he’d gotten home and you were infatuated with him. It used to annoy you, because he’d been such an ass to you that you hated how attractive he was. Then things changed, and now looking at him was just frustrating you. You were terrified about the way he made you feel, like everything would be okay with one look of those blue eyes and a smirk. You felt like he had your back, a vast change from how you used to feel and it was just getting hard to hide it anymore.

Especially when Matthew looked like he did right now. He was holding himself up on the dock, shoulders broad and glistening in the moonlight above you. All your friends were inside, moving their party away from the water as the night lingered on. You wanted to run your fingers through his wet curls, the temptation was almost too much.

“I’ll be in Chicago a few times you know,” Matthew hums, enjoying the time alone he was getting with you. Anytime without Brady teasing him about what the Tkachuk’s had been referring to as the hand holding incident. He didn’t want them to think he didn’t want you, because he did, but he just needed to move at his own pace.

“You want to come see me play?” You ask, leaning back on the palms of your hands. You were surprised by the kind of man Matthew had become, it was a completely different person that he used to be. He cared so much about his loved ones, and you were starting to feel like maybe you had a place there.

“Actually thinking you could come see me play,” Matthew teases, sarcasm dripping from his words. You lifted your foot up, kicking some of the water below you to splash him, but he’d caught your ankle before you could. He stopped for a moment, running a thumb over your skin, “This looks better.”

“Don’t make you admit you were right,” You whine, Matthew swiftly pulling you into the water with him. You yelp, the water way too cold for any normal person, “It’s freezing.”

“C’mere then,” Matthew grabs your waist, pulling your body against his. His hands were splayed across your back, heat radiating off of them. One of your hands was on his shoulder, your other on his chest. You could feel his heart beating quickly, his eyes locked on yours, “Middle school Matthew would be so jealous of me right now.”

“Why’s that?” You hum, running your fingers along Matthew to play connect the dots with the beauty marks on his skin.

“Because he had the biggest crush on you,” Matthew confesses, his grip on you a little tighter, as if he was afraid you’d slip right through his fingers again, “But he was too thick headed to do anything about it.”

“What about grown up Matthew?” You ask, biting your lip. Matthew was practically holding you both up in the water, pressed so close together you could hear the hitch in his breath at your question, “Is he too thick headed to do something too?”

You wrapped your legs around Matthew’s waist, pressing your lips to his and tugging on the curls at the base of his neck. He pushed you up against the dock, helping you back up and pulling himself up next to you. You grabbed the back of his neck, latching your lips back on his. His hand was on your back, fingers toying with the back of your bathing suit, “Think we can get upstairs without anyone noticing?”

Matthew was cool most of the time. He never faltered under the pressure from his career, most of the time, and he definitely didn’t fold when it came to a pretty girl. You had him in the palm of your hand, every part of his brain malfunctioning in response to your words. You bit your lip, wondering if you’d read this entire situation. Matthew rubs a thumb along your lip, “When are you going to realize I’d do whatever you asked me to?”

The two of you snuck up the stairs, giggles and stolen kisses left in your wake. You open the door, Matthew’s hands still toying your bathing suit top, “Just take it off already Matty.”

“Don’t have to ask me twice,” Matthew breathes, his lips pressed against your neck while the garment falls to the floor, “So fucking beautiful.”

You back hit the mattress, Matthew’s hands running up your body slowly. Slow wasn’t in Matthew’s vocabulary, but he was taking his time just in case he never got this opportunity again. His fingers hooked under your bathing suit bottoms, sliding the wet fabric down your legs. You looked so beautiful, spread out just for Matthew like he’d dreamed about numerous times. His lips moved down to your breasts, teeth grazing against your skin while his tongue swirled against your nipple. You let out a breathy moan, Matthew’s ego boosting from the sound. You plucked at his curls while his mouth moved down to where you were craving him most, a gentle kiss to your clit, “Matty, please.”

“I didn’t peg you for the type to beg,” Matthew hums, pressing feather light kisses around your core. He stopped, gripping your thighs and looking up at you, “You sure about this?”

“Yes, please,” You whine, pussy dripping from Matthew’s hot breath fanning over it. Matthew chuckles darkly, fingers digging into your thighs when he flicked his tongue over your clit. You moan, completely unbothered by the blaring music a floor below you. Matthew didn’t seem to be bothered either, his tongue teasing your entrance while his nose rubbed against your clit, living for the way you were whimpering above him, “Matty-”

“Close baby?” Matthew groans, slipping a finger inside of you and curling it. You back arched, his name falling through your lips was enough to answer his question. Your legs shook, pleasure washing over your body from Matthew and all of it just felt so right. Matthew’s lips were latched to your skin until he finally met your eyes again. He smiles softly, nudging his nose with yours while you caught your breath, “So good for me.”

“Should’ve known you were that good with your mouth with the way you run it,” You tease smiling against his lips.

“Not with you, not anymore,” Matthew promises, soft blue eyes looking into yours, he meant it. He didn’t know how else to make it clearer, he wanted you. You kissed him slowly, hands trailing down his abs and stopping where his shorts hit his waist. Matthew kicks off his swim trunks, cock springing free. You grab the back of his neck, pulling your lips to his and rolling over top of him and straddling his waist. It was criminal how good you looked on top of him, “Gonna ride me babe?”

You nod, lining his dick up your core and lowering yourself on top of him. You let out a whine, Matthew’s smug smile on full display once he realized it was because of how big he was, “We don’t have to if my dick’s too big.”

“Oh shut up,” You roll your hips, watching the way Matthew’s head fell back, smirking because he really thought he had control here. Matthew’s hands gripped your waist, moving your hips faster. His finger flicked over your clit, causing you to lunge forward on top of him. Matthew flipped you over, wrapping a leg around his waist so he could hit your g-spot. Your hands gripped his shoulders, nails leaving scratches Matthew was going to wear pride later. You were seeing stars, noises leaving your throat you’d never even heard yourself make, “Fuck, Matty, I’m gonna cum again.”

“Look at me,” Matthew grabs your chin, pressing his forehead against yours and watching while your eyes roll back with pleasure. Your pussy clenched around him, his own cum spilling into you from the sensation, a loud groan following. Matthew pressed a kiss to your forehead, his cock still buried inside of you, “I wasn’t bullshitting you, I mean every word Y/N.”

“Matthew,” You whisper, running a finger along his back, “The distance…”

You didn’t mention everything, the way that if this was real it meant it would end up ripping you both apart. You were set to live in a different city, Matthew all the way in another country. The way your dreams included a spot on the U.S. National team, and the idea that wanting to be with Matthew would hold you back was terrifying. The way his dreams probably meant staying in Calgary forever, a C on his jersey and a cup over his head. It wasn’t going to be easy, you weren’t ever going to be the doting girlfriend he probably needed. There would be years of travel schedules and games that overlapped, and a part of you thought that maybe Matthew wouldn’t be able to do it. You’d get a year in and he’d find someone who would be there more and finally you’d end it.

“We can make it work, baby I want you, I always have and I probably always will,” Matthew starts, baring his soul to another person for the first time in his goddamn life, “I want to support your dreams and have you be there for mine. I’m all in here, I don’t know how else to tell you.”

“Can I have some time?” You plead, holding onto Matthew’s shoulders because you knew he could leave and tell you to never speak to him again. Matthew sighs, understanding the way you were shitting yourself about starting your own professional career, remembering the way rookie Matthew would have died before he considered settling down that first year, “Please don’t leave me-”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Matthew promises, rolling over and letting your rest on his chest, “I’ll wait for you.”

You smile, snuggling closer to him. Matthew didn’t sleep a minute that night, running every single scenario that could possibly happen with the two of you. Matthew was sure it would work out, it had to, because if it didn’t he wasn’t sure he’d be able to recover.

So now all he could was wait.

***

You know this is creepy right?

Matthew stares at Sam, punching his teammate in the arm lightly and telling him to shut up. He had a night off in Chicago, and after four straight hours of staring at your contact in his phone, Matthew finally just bought the tickets. He’d been good at keeping his distance, you needed space and he respected you enough to try and give it to you. He wasn’t doing so hot, Matthew consuming more soccer games than hockey games at this point. It started with your first game, because how was he supposed to just pretend like it wasn’t happening? You scored too, and it took everything in his power not to call you to tell you that not only was he right, he was insanely proud of you.

And he’d been hearing it from everyone. Your sister thought it was bullshit, Taryn and Jamie almost had Matthew on a flight to Chicago ready to show up like a terrible Lifetime movie. Brady thought it was hilarious the way Matthew was simping like this for one girl. Now, his teammates were on him, wondering why on Earth their friend who historically ran through women faster than he did mouthguards could be this hung up on someone he had a crush on in middle school.

“What number is she?” Sam asks, sipping the beer he forced Matthew to buy after making him go along with this.

“Nineteen,” Matthew smiles, pointing down at you on the field. You looked so happy, warming up with one of your teammates and a bright smile on your face. It seemed like a good fit, your team and your new city, and it made Matthew’s heart grow four sizes.

“Did she choose your number?” Sam jokes and Matthew mumbles something under his breath, “What?”

“It was her number first,” Matthew admits, not wanting to ever confess to another soul that you crossed his mind when he kept that camp number. Sam howled next to him, leaning over his seat and cracking up at his teammate.

You looked out in the crowd about halfway through the game, rubbing your eyes to make sure you weren’t seeing things. That tuft of curls was hard to miss, not to mention you knew just how big Matthew was. He was far too into the game to realize you caught him, up in arms about a call against your team that was valid but he’d argue it wasn’t. You asked for space, and it was getting harder to stick to your guns. Especially when he was making it so clear that he wanted this.

And whether or not you went to his game the next night, was a secret you’d take to the grave.

***

You were so close you could have tasted it.

While the final seconds of your season came to a close, all you could do was hold your head in your hands and hope no one caught the tears. A semi-final loss was devastating, but a semi-final loss where there wasn’t anything you could have done differently was even worse. Every athlete had off nights, a point Keith pushed right before you left to start your season, and he was right. Unfortunately, that was this game. Your biggest fear had come true and there was nothing you could do about it now. The game was over and you weren’t moving on.

And Matthew watched it.

Matthew promised you space, and he swore he’d give you the time you needed to settle down. But, this was something he couldn’t ignore. He could tell you were off, your entire rookie season was almost perfect and watching the way you folded during this game was gut wrenching. Matthew knew better than anyone, losing sucked. So he took the chance, grabbing his phone and shooting you a text he’d been waiting to send.

Doors open in Calgary.

and I’m so fucking proud of you.

It was the very last text you saw before you went to bed that night, tossing and turning for a few hours thinking about that loss. You couldn’t stop, every bone in your body was aching and you didn’t know what to do. So you bought a flight, packed your shit and was walking down the hallway to Matthew’s apartment without a second thought. You’d left him on read, calling Brady in the middle of the night and asking for his address, who gave it to you reluctantly with a reminder that if you needed to see him this badly you should rethink the needing time thing.

Matthew let out a groan when he had a bang at his door at three in the morning. Noah definitely was trying to walk into the wrong apartment again, and Matthew was grouchy when he whipped his door open. Except it wasn’t Noah after he’d had too many. It was you, teary eyed with your shit in a suitcase and a broken heart.

“I can’t stop thinking about it,” You admit, whispering something you never thought you’d say to anyone, “I just didn’t do enough-”

Matthew didn’t say a word, pulling you into a bone crushing hug and holding you as tightly as he could. You didn’t need to hear it from him, about how things were out of your control and you did your best. You didn’t want that right now, you wanted him, “Baby…”

“Everything hurts,” You whimper, finally just letting it all out. You were bruised and battered from the season, the physical pain alone was enough to upset you, let alone the loss you just took. Matthew carded his fingers through your hair, letting you soak his bare chest with your tears because he wouldn’t have it any other way. You came back to him. You came back to him when things got too tough because you trusted him to bring you some peace, and he was happy about it.

You passed out sometime after that, your tears finally running dry and the exchaustion taking over your body. Matthew woke up early the next day, grateful for the optional morning skate so he could stay with you for just a little bit longer. The sun was just starting to peek through the curtains in his room, a calm snowy morning in Calgary so the city was just a bit quieter.

Matthew settled on breakfast, working away in his kitchen with the only thing he knew how to make. Tell her you made it, his mom’s words from just a few months prior in his head while he cooked. You padded out his bedroom, one of Matthew’s god awful beer shirts hanging from your frame while you wrapped your arms around his waist and pressed a kiss into his back, “It’s cold here.”

“You’ll get used to it,” Matthew hums, internally pumping his fist when he felt your lips form a smile against his skin. You turned your head, pressing your cheek against his against and letting out a laugh, “What’s so funny?”

“You framed my jersey?” You ask, your eye catching a jersey that was way too familiar. It was hung up beside Matthew’s from his first all star game, both number nineteens staring back at you.

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re my favorite player,” Matthew hums, a blush covering his cheeks, “I’m so proud of you.”

“You keep saying that,” Matthew finally turns around, pressing a quick peck to your lips.

“I’ll keep saying it long after we both retire,” Matthew speaks, words clear and sure because he’s had plenty of time to practice this one, “I’ll say it when you win a World Cup gold, I’ll say it when we have kids, I’ll say when you play at the Olympics. I’m going to say it over and over again.”

“But…” You trail off, all of those same demons you’d been fighting when it came to your whatever this was with Matthew, “What I’m not around enough for you?”

Matthew knew what you were thinking about, he’d thought about it plenty too. There were countless sleepless nights where all he did was wonder if you’d find someone in Chicago who could support you better than he could. He’d do his best, he swore he would, but in order for you to be happy, your passion came first. There was always going to be times when he couldn’t be there and it killed him.

“You’re more than enough,” Matthew promises, his lips ghosting over yours, “I want you to seize every opportunity in the world, I just want to be there to tell you that I love you and use the goat emoji on Instagram when you do.”

You let out a laugh, Matthew’s smile wide enough to see his dimples you loved so much, “I think I want to stay a little while.”

“I think you should,” Matthew agrees, capturing your lips in his, “Besides I’m playing tonight and I think I need to show off now.”

“You’re a cocky asshole.”

“But now I’m your cocky asshole.”

***

One year Later

You had a good reason to be late.

You swore Matthew couldn’t possibly be mad at you for this one. You’d missed your flight to Calgary, a few days post a second loss in the semi finals that you’d been taking much better this time around. Mainly because Matthew wasn’t there, but his stupid smile and words of encouragement where there on facetime hours later. That wasn’t the reason you were late, the reason you were late was because you’d received the most insane news of your life and it was an important phone or that flight. You’d caught the next one, legs shaking not to just call him and share the news, but you needed to tell him in person.

You’d finally gotten by the doors to the locker room entrance, out of breath from spriting there from your cab. There was Matthew, tapping his phone and staring at the clock on his phone with furrowed eyebrows. He was still in his suit, tie pulled a little looser, a nervous habit you realized he had some time ago, “Matty-”

“Don’t call me that just because you know you’re late,” Matthew huffs, already ready for the pout that would have followed so he’d forget all about the fact that you promised you’d make it on time. He holds his hand out, waiting for the handshake he made up in the car on the way to the first game you went to after he finally locked it down. You laugh, slapping your hand against his and letting him pull you closer for a kiss.

“They want me on the National Team,” You mumble against his lips, the words spilling out of your mouth when you pull away with an excited smile. Matthew stood there stunned, while you shuffled your feet in the little dance you did when you were really happy. He grabs your cheeks, pressing kisses to your lips again and again.

“We’re celebrating after this, holy shit,” Matthew cheers, still stunned by your news, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, now go score a few goals so we have even more to celebrate,” You kiss him one more time, pushing him before the door before he was late.

“Anything I do seems unimportant now!” Matthew calls out, a light laugh to his voice as he watched you walk away to go sit in the stands.

And that’s how Matthew thought it should be.

#matthew tkachuk #matthew tkachuk imagine #my writing #nhl imagine #nhl imagines

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megalony · 4 years

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Teacher’s Pet- Part 12

I hope you all like the next part in my dad! Ben Hardy series, thank you all for the amazing feedback so far and I have a lot planned for you all.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogermeddow @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @rogahs-drowse @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @peterquillzsblog @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh

Series taglist: @im-an-adult-ish @gwilymleeisbae @k-k0129 @haileymorelikestupid @glittrixvibe

Series masterlist

Summary: Gwilym sets Ben up on a date with (Y/n) who teaches at the school Ben’s kids go to. But Ben is hesitant in the relationship, desperate not to make the same mistakes and needing to put his kids first.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Will you pick me up in the morning?"

Ben tilted his head down with narrowed eyes and a small smile as he looked at James who was clinging to his legs like a baby monkey. Today was the first time in nearly three months that James was going to be staying overnight with his mum and it was the first time in two months he would actually be seeing her. But the way James spoke made it clear he seemed worried about something and that made Ben uneasy, he didn't like any of his boys being worried.

"I thought your mum was dropping you off sometime tomorrow? Don't you want to spend the way with her tomorrow too?" Leaning down, Ben hooked his hands under James' arms and picked him up so he could sit him on the kitchen counter in front of him.

"But we always play football on Sunday." The way James looked between his hands and Ben's eyes showed there was something on his mind and it wasn't just because of playing football. Ben turned his head to look at (Y/n) over his shoulder who put her drink down before making her way over to them. She leaned against Ben's side with her hand on his arm and she reached over to rub James' shoulder to try and calm him down when he looked slightly panicked.

"Honey, are you worried because you haven't seen your mum in a while?" (Y/n) couldn't help but wonder if James was getting anxious because he hadn't been around his mum in over two months now. He was in a routine with Ben and his mum was going to shake that up and she knew from experience that when children got used to living with one parent, being with the other made them feel unsettled.

Ellie might not know what James preferred to eat or what he liked to do, when he went to bed, what he liked to watch or where he liked to go. If she guessed with everything or did something that made James uneasy or something he didn't like it would make him desperate for Ben to take him home. Then he would be even less likely to want to go out with his mum. He was always desperate for her to make the effort and be in his life and actually want him around but the longer she left it, the less he actually wanted to go.

"Buddy, talk to us. Don't you want to go out to your mum today?"

"I... I don't like staying over at mums house. I like my room here at home and I like what you and (Y/n) cook and I want to go out with you tomorrow, not mum... a-and Carter calls you mum and I want to do that too but then my mum will be mad at me."

As James started talking faster tears started to fall from his eyes and he tried his best to hold back a sob. He didn't want to tell his mum that he didn't like staying with her because she made him feel awkward, nor did he want to tell her that he wanted to call (Y/n) his mum just like Carter did. He didn't want to hurt her feelings or upset her in case she got mad with him and decided not to come and visit him any more when she barely visited him as it was.

"Oh buddy, hey it's okay, it's alright." Ben wrapped his arms around James' waist and gently scooped James up and set him on his chest.

"James, honey, it's okay if you don't want to stay over with your mum, no one said you had to. If you want to stay home she'll understand she won't be mad at you for that and if you really do want to call me mum, then you can and just call me by my name if your mum is around so we don't upset her."

"She'll be mad at me."

James buried his face in the crook of Ben's neck and it made Ben shiver to feel his boy crying into his neck. He hated when any of the boys cried but knowing James was crying because of Ellie made Ben feel so much worse. He was used to Carter crying and screaming because he could no longer see Jamie, he was used to Finn having nightmares and being in fear of ever seeing Lucy again. But with James Ben had been praying that it would be different, he wanted James to be able to see his mum and have one of his boys with a good relationship with his mum.

But James barely got to see Ellie anymore and as much as he didn't think on it too much, when he did get to see her he overthought everything now because it was unsettling for him.

The only good thing about all of this was that (Y/n) was here and she was providing all the boys with a mother figure and a sense of stability and a routine that they all needed.

"She won't be mad at you buddy because when she comes to pick you up, I'm gonna tell her that she needs to bring you home tonight because we're going out early tomorrow so you need to come home. Your mum won't know you don't want to stay I promise, she won't be mad at you and you can sleep in your own bed tonight and come out with us tomorrow. It's all okay you don't have to be upset."

Ben knew Ellie well enough to know that she wouldn't be too disappointed if she couldn't have James stay with her tonight. It wasn't as if they had scheduled visits anyway, she came to pick James up whenever she had the time off or whenever she could be bothered. If she complained Ben could simply remind her she couldn't make the rules when she couldn't stick to looking after her son more than once every three months.

If James was too scared to ask to come home Ben would tell Ellie she had to bring him home and make out that it was Ben's idea and therefore his fault so James didn't get unsettled.

"No more tears honey, you'll be home for tea time and we don't want your mum to see any tears, do we?" (Y/n) brushed her finger over James' cheek to wipe away the tears when he lifted his head to look over at her. Ellie would be here in a few minutes to come and get James, they didn't need her wondering if he was okay and what was wrong.

(Y/n) handed James his cup of juice to try and help him calm down before all their heads turned in the direction of the hall when the doorbell sounded.

"Come on, let's go see her." Ben set James down to his feet and moved to follow him into the hall.

"You're gonna answer the door in your boxers?"

"Yeah, why? She won't be coming inside and it's not like none of you have seen me like this before." Ben looked down at his limited attire with a smile before he moved towards the door again as James sat on the stairs to put on his shoes. Ben was only wearing his boxers but it wasn't as if Ellie would be coming in the house, she never did she waited on the doorstep for James and she had seen him answer the door like this hundreds of times before. All the boys were used to Ben wandering the house like this.

When (Y/n) moved to try and go upstairs Ben hooked his arm around her waist and pulled her back, knowing why she was trying to run off.

"I'm in my pyjamas."

"Yeah, you look sexy. Don't try and sneak upstairs so she won't see you, James talks about you all the time you don't have to hide away or feel awkward. Your more his mum than she is, don't be ashamed of that."

Ben knew (Y/n) didn't want to be around right now because she had never met Ellie before and she didn't want to. From what (Y/n) had picked up on and what she had heard, Ellie wasn't going to win a mother's award anytime soon and that annoyed (Y/n). But she didn't want to be in an awkward situation if James did talk about her a lot and she made Ellie feel annoyed or threatened or Ellie became snarky or something like that.

(Y/n) wasn't actually James' mother and he was the only boy with his mum actually hanging around right now, (Y/n) didn't want to step on Ellie's toes and push her away when she was the only mother giving a shit in the boy's lives. James had a mother, (Y/n) couldn't wade in and be his substitute mother if he didn't need one like Carter and Finn did.

"Hi mummy."

(Y/n) didn't know what she was expecting when Ben opened the front door to reveal Ellie, but the person she was faced with wasn't exactly the person (Y/n) thought she had been expecting. Ben talked about Jamie when he tried to explain Carter's childhood and how Jamie had affected him by not being there, he didn't talk about Lucy at all. But when he talked about Ellie, the impression (Y/n) got was a business woman, someone who took pride in their job so much that the job came first before her only child.

She went away for conferences and meetings, she worked late, she didn't use her days off to see James and she barely called him because she was 'always busy.'

Ellie was the kind of mother who only became concerned and interested in her son's life when she thought that he might be in danger of being hurt such as with Lucy. Other than that, any achievements James made at school or anything he did socially wasn't of much concern to Ellie.

It made (Y/n) wonder why she even had James in the first place if the best she could do for her son was to give birth to him.

The image (Y/n) had in her mind was a tall woman in her late twenties or maybe early thirties with broad shoulders and long dark brown hair and piercing eyes. She thought of a woman who wore heels even though she was tall and who wore business suits (which Ben had said she did wear to conferences).

Ellie was nothing like (Y/n) had pictured her to be. She was a short woman, barely reaching five foot one at a push. She had very long natural blonde hair that swept down past her shoulders in long curls and she had pale blue eyes that weren't very captivating or shining. Her nose was small but curved at the end in a funny fashion, she had small shoulders an a generally small frame which made (Y/n) look at Ben for a moment. If Ellie and Ben were stood side by side they would look rather odd with how tall and broad framed Ben was and how petite and compact Ellie looked.

James took after Ben in almost every aspect, he had Ben's eyes, his hair and the shape of his face. He had Ben's height because he was already creeping up to match Ellie's height but he did have her slim shoulders but in every other way he was Ben's child and didn't look like he resembled Ellie at all.

Ellie wore very small converse that showed how small she was and how small her feet were. She had leggings on that were a bit too long for her short legs and she was wearing a white baggy t-shirt with red writing across the centre. (Y/n) had been expecting her to wear jeans or a jumpsuit or just something that showed she was a business woman but she was dressing rather casually and it didn't fit (Y/n)'s image of her at all.

"Hey champ, you ready to go?" Ellie's voice was loud and strong, contrasting to the petite image she gave off.

"Can you bring him back tonight please, we're off out early tomorrow so I need him home tonight." Ben rubbed his hand over James' back to try and keep him calm and show him that Ellie wouldn't be mad or upset with him for this.

"Oh, yeah sure I'll have him back by seven. How's Carter by the way?" Ben's words clearly confused and annoyed Ellie, her expression looked deflated and she held back a sigh at the change of plans but she wasn't going to complain. All three adults knew she was in no position to quarrel about this when she barely made an appearance in James' life so far.

"He's doing really good, he's asleep at the moment."

"Asleep? Wow, he is doing good if he's sleeping. I assume your (Y/n) who James keeps telling me about?"

A look of surprise flooded Ellie's face at the notion that it was eight in the morning and Carter wasn't bouncing around the house, he was actually asleep for once this late into the morning when he was usually up all night. When her eyes floated over to look at (Y/n) she smiled warmly which made (Y/n) hopeful that there would be no bad blood between them. After all, she had seen Ben get into another relationship and have another child with someone else so seeing him in a different relationship again wouldn't be anything for her to be angry about.

"I am, it's nice to meet you." Something inside (Y/n) told her that it wasn't that nice to meet Ellie because it had taken this long for them to meet and for Ellie to actually want James to come round. If she was more of a mother or a stable figure for James then (Y/n) would have been happier to meet her because James wouldn't be as panicked as he was earlier or desperate to call (Y/n) mum instead of Ellie.

"And you. Come on champ, we'd better head off."

"See you tomorrow buddy." A soft smile formed on Ben's lips as he brushed his fingers through James' hair to ruffle it up causing James to shake his head with a giggle. He pulled away from Ben, briefly darting his eyes over to (Y/n) and he smiled brightly before he headed out the house knowing he was going to be back home later where he felt most safe.

"She doesn't even come up to your shoulder." (Y/n) commented quietly and slowly tilted her head to look at Ben whose brows shot up and he smothered a smile.

"Not even when she wears heels. Aren't you glad James takes after me?" It was a trivial thing to think about but Ben did think about James taking after him in his height and sometimes in his looks. If James took after Ellie then it meant Ben would be tall, Carter would be tall because he was Ben's double and Finn was undoubtedly going to be tall too since Lucy was Ben's height as well. If James was under five foot like Ellie it would be a bit weird with the boys growing up.

(Y/n) bit the corner of her lip to stop herself from smirking before she moved to head upstairs. It was still early but she wanted to get dressed and ready for the day.

A gasp left (Y/n)'s lips when she moved to head to the bedroom but got stopped by Ben's arm hooking around her waist and pulling her back to his chest. She froze for a moment, smiling despite the confusion of wondering what he was doing and she leaned her head back on his shoulder to look up at him. The soft smile on his lips and the certain look in his eyes both melted her heart and made her unsure what was going through his mind right now.

"What?"

"Let's do the test now."

"Now? W-why now?" (Y/n) couldn't hear her own voice but she could hear the deafening sound of her heart thumping erratically against her ribs to the point it felt like the organ was going to combust in her chest.

For this past week the subject of doing a pregnancy test had come and gone frequently but it never happened. (Y/n) herself was nervous to find out the results but she knew Ben was even more so. He didn't want to be in a bad or stressed mood and do the test in case it affected how he reacted because that wouldn't be fair on (Y/n).

Not knowing seemed easy at the moment because he could forget that it was a looming problem just for a while. But when it did play on his mind it never left. If they were having a baby Ben didn't want it to turn out like it had the last three times, he wanted just for once, to have a baby with someone he loved and have it work out. For them both to love their child and not have the relationship break down and shatter into fragments Ben could never piece back together again. He wanted it to work and to be right and have no issues whatsoever.

And he knew if they weren't having a baby the subject of kids in the future would be confusing and taboo because of how he had reacted at the mere thought of a possible pregnancy.

"Right now because each time I've sat through a pregnancy test I've been scared to shit. I knew Jamie wouldn't cope with a baby but she wanted to go ahead with it and that turned out bad, Ellie was always gonna put work before James and that frightened me. And Lucy seemed too good to be true and they all left me and the boys. But you... you love all of them like they're your sons and you're not unable to cope or scared or putting work first and there isn't a mean streak in you I don't know about. You're perfect to all us boys and I don't want to be scared this time."

Ben and Jamie had been eighteen when they had Carter and Jamie's mental health and always been fluctuating but she mistakenly thought having Carter would help. She could cope with Carter as a baby and toddler but when his needs and problems became apparent she couldn't cope and she left.

Ellie was determined and skilled and as much as she wanted James, he was a distraction that got in her determined path and she couldn't have that. Ben knew from square one that it would be complicated with Ellie and he knew for certain James was the only child she was ever going to have.

Something told Ben when he was with Lucy that she was too good to be true because she was great with James and she tried with Carter even when he was at a bad stage in his attitude and his outbursts. But he was still nervous when she got pregnant because experience told Ben that having a kid didn't work out for him and Finn got the brunt end of fate. None of those times had gone smoothly or been easy for Ben or his boys and he didn't want to repeat that yet again.

But with (Y/n) it was going to be different because she had a connection with the boys, she loved them all and treated them like they were her children. And there was no dark side to (Y/n) that Ben hadn't seen yet. If they were having a baby it would be loved and not hurt or broken or left to be cared for by Ben alone.

"Let's find out."

(Y/n) breathed through her words that made her feel lightheaded because she didn't think this moment was going to be a very happy one to remember.

She watched with fond eyes as Ben peeked into Carter's room to check he was still asleep before he followed her to the bathroom. Finn was still in bed since he was a late riser, Carter went to bed at five this morning so Ben was leaving him until at least twelve so he got some sleep. And now James had gone out so they had the time alone to do this and talk about it before the boys got up and demanded attention.

The waiting wasn't nice.

When (Y/n) used to think about her life and try to plan it all out, she always imagined going to the doctor or holding the test in her hands with her husband waiting to see if they were expecting a baby or not. She never thought about how nervous she would feel sitting on the toilet looking at Ben leaning against the sink as they waited until it was okay to check the results.

The moment Ben checked his watch and silently nodded his head, (Y/n) stayed tense and unmoving until Ben got the hint that she wanted him to do it instead. She was too nervous to look, she wanted to be told the news and she figured the last three times Ben didn't get to check the results first, he got to see after he had been told if they were expecting or not. This could be his moment.

For being anxious about this moment (Y/n) noticed that Ben looked oddly calm, he wasn't tapping his foot like usual or scratching at his neck or arms. He wasn't biting his lip or frowning or raising his brows in surprise and he wasn't letting the result show on his expression. Even when his eyes moved to lock with her own, he wasn't giving anything away.

"We're having a baby."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Mum?"

(Y/n) turned her head to the left to look over at Carter and she smiled whilst pressing her finger to her lips, trying to be gentle when asking him to be quiet since he was usually rather loud when he spoke, especially when he was overexcited or angry. Her eyes darted to look over at Finn who was laid between the side of the sofa and Ben, fast asleep with a blanket draped over him. It was best not to wake him right now when it normally took a while to get him to sleep.

"What's up honey?" (Y/n) noticed the way Carter was darting his eyes around, unsure where to look meaning it wasn't anything exciting or something he was happy about. But his expression was placid and neutral so he wasn't unhappy either.

"James is crying, he spewed on the bathroom floor."

(Y/n)'s shoulders deflated and she pursed her lips before turning to look over at Ben with furrowed brows. James had been back home for just less than an hour and he seemed tired but he didn't look ill. And he hadn't eaten anything since being back that would make him sick, nor had Ellie said he had been ill during the day.

"Go back to your game buddy, we'll go see him." Ben slowly uncurled his arm from around Finn before he and (Y/n) hurried upstairs after Carter who wandered back to his room. It wasn't too surprising that Carter didn't react to this quite like he should, if he didn't know how to react or it wasn't something that really bothered him he just seemed like he was in neutral.

The pair of them barely got up the stairs before they saw James hobbling out of the bathroom with his arms around his stomach and his body doubled over like there was a crippling weight on his back. There was almost no colour to his cheeks either, he looked pale to the point of being see-through.

"I- I didn't m-make it to the toilet." It seemed like talking was hard for James who sounded like he was about to throw up again but was trying very hard not to.

"Don't worry about that baby, better out than in. Let's get you in bed and I'll go get you some medicine." (Y/n) reached her arms out for James but the moment she held onto him he shook his head before he slumped down to sit on the floor, curling his knees up to his stomach before a sob left his lips.

"I really think we should get you in bed with the sick bucket." Ben pressed the back of his hand against James' temple for a moment before he wrapped his arms around him to try and calm him down. He didn't have a temperature but he clearly wasn't well at all. When Carter was ill he got grumpy and angry but when James or Finn were sick or unwell they didn't know what to do and broke down in tears if it was bad.

If any of the boys were sick Ben settled them in bed and gave them a plastic bowl they used so the boys didn't have to stumble out to the bathroom if they were really ill. They could just lean over and throw up into the bucket, Ben found it saved a lot of washing and cleaning up the carpets or bathroom.

Ben was just about to wrap James up so he could carry him to bed but he stopped when James tensed and pressed his arms into his stomach that made a worrying gurgling noise.

"James, what have you eaten today?" Ben's words were cautious but his eyes were a darker shade than before and it made (Y/n) worried.

"Fishfingers for d-dinner... biscuits, a-and mum made a funny pie thing w-with a weird name, Ki... something. S-she got me a milkshake but you said I can't have them anymore."

Ben pulled his arms back a little when James groaned before he turned and flopped down so his head was pressed into Ben's legs and he was curled up against him like he wanted to disappear. He rubbed his hand over James' back for a few moments but the look on his face was outrage. When he locked eyes with (Y/n) it was clear that she was on the same page as he was and that made it even worse. (Y/n) remembered that James was lactose intolerant right now but Ellie either didn't remember or didn't care and Ben didn't know which was worse.

"Did she make a quiche?"

"Hmm." James nodded into Ben's legs, knowing the name of whatever he had eaten had been a funny one he couldn't say or remember.

"That's got cheese and a lot of milk in it buddy, you can't have dairy stuff like that it makes you sick. Come on, I'm gonna take you to bed and get you some Calpol." Ben's jaw clenched but he tried to stay calm as he picked James up because he didn't want James thinking he was mad at him because he wasn't.

James didn't know what quiche was, Ben had never made it or given it to him and when he found out James was lactose intolerant Ben cut out all dairy stuff from his diet. A little bit of milk now and then was okay but James had it bad and it really messed with his stomach. What made it worse was that there was no specific medication for this, Ben just had to give him Calpol for stomach ache and sometimes paracetamol if it was really bad. James just had to wait it out until it went away and that made Ben hurt.

But he had told Ellie time and time again that James couldn't have anything with dairy in, not even a small slice of quiche because it would still upset his stomach. James loved milkshakes but Ben had to say no because it was only going to make him sick.

The moment James was tucked up in bed and Ben left the room (Y/n) could see his face of thunder.

"I told her when I took him to the doctors that he couldn't have dairy and she didn't fucking listen and now he's crying." Ben knew it wasn't something as bad as an allergy or James having a medical condition but it was still something serious for him. It gave him horrible stomach cramps, it made him sick and it upset him to be hurting like this. That was pretty damn important to Ben that James didn't have to go through this and Ellie should have listened and took more notice of what Ben was saying.

"You did say that James wasn't her top priority..." (Y/n) didn't know what she was supposed to say to that because Ben was right and it wasn't okay to do this to James. It was bad enough he didn't feel okay around her but to make him ill like this was even worse.

"What if he was allergic to anything and she didn't listen? I'm calling her first thing tomorrow, if she wants to see him again she has to make a fucking effort and actually take care of him."

Ben ran his fingers through his hair but stopped tugging at his hair when (Y/n) curled her arms around his waist and looked up at him with a soft smile.

"I agree, but she isn't around that much anyway and he wants to be home with you because he knows you take care of him and you know what he needs and what he likes."

"But she's meant to be his mum-"

"It's a good job he sees me as a mother then, isn't it?"

#ben hardy #ben x reader #dad! ben #ben hardy imagine #imagine #BoRhap #gwilym lee #gwilym imagine #teachers pet

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please-return-to-villanelle · 4 years

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Choices

Season 3 episode 4 recap part 2

Choices Eve, it’s all about choices.

Niko reached a breaking point with Eve at the beginning of season 3. He has been locked in a storage container with the corpse of his former friend and co-worked, Gemma, and had quite a lot of time to reflect on his life and choices.

The conclusion he came to, after several rounds of therapy, was to free himself of his toxic marriage and start over.

I think we both know I deserve better.

Niko chose to move to Poland and get the normal, simple life he always wanted. He also chose NOT to tell Eve since she has put his life and the life of his friends (Dom and Gemma) in danger and brings nothing but chaos into his life.

Niko chose to cut his ties to Eve and start over entirely.

Eve on the other hand chooses NOT to respect Niko’s wishes and instead obsessively texts him... a week after he left for Poland.

Keep that important point in mind.

It took her an entire week to reach out to Niko, as was revealed by the staff member at the therapy center who reluctantly told Eve that Niko discharged himself and mentioned something about Poland.

So, why the contradictions in Eve’s behavior? Is she fully invested in her relationship with Niko or not?

Choices.

Through out the series we she Eve cling to her relationship with Niko when her life gets darker. Eve has a dark side to her that Villanelle picks up on immediately and is something Eve can openly indulge in through her work investigating murders. It’s something she is passionate about and has kept hidden about herself to everyone in her life including Niko.

Though Eve is learning about this darkness within her, she still hasn’t fully committed to what type of life she wants: dark or light, normal or abnormal, safe or dangerous?

She constantly teeters on the precipice.

Which is why whenever she indulges in her darker urges just a little too much the first thing she does as a reflex is cling to the good and normal in her life: Niko.

So why did it take her a week to check up on Niko?

She’s alive Eve.. and she’s working.

Because Eve chose to get back in the game of hunting the Twelve and once again became consumed with this chase. This is the same chase that “destroyed” Eve’s life before but she willing steps right back in. Sure part of her motivation is to get justice for Kenny but at the very core of it, this is a game Eve was made to play and it’s an itch she needs to scratch.

But when the game hits close to home and Eve starts to loose control and indulge in her deeper desires, that’s when she clings to her safety blanket of normalcy.

Hi, Eve.

So here we have Eve desperately clinging to the idea of Niko in the aftermath of kissing Villanelle.

But this comes at a cost.

Had Eve respected Niko’s wishes and left him alone, he would still be alive.

She chose to text him nonstop despite Niko making it clear that he wanted to move on from her by literally moving away. Because Eve couldn’t let it go, Dasha seized the opportunity to drive a wedge between her and Villanelle by harming someone Eve still cared about. If she didn’t care, then she wouldn’t be texting him. Perception is everything.

But Eve is no stranger to endangering the lives of others.

Eve chose to tell her co-workers at the Bitter Pill about the Twelve, in fact she cut them off when they protested after she told them their lives would be in danger once she tells them about what Kenny was working on. Once again, Eve put her needs and wants before others and did not think twice about how the consequences of her actions may affect other people.

This scene with Jamie gave us a metaphor for Eve’s behavior. He admitted that he killed his friend accidentally with the very drug he gave to him. With Eve, she may very well get her co-workers at the Bitter Pill killed if they uncover too much about the Twelve; thus, killing them with their own investigation by bringing her insight into the Twelve (ie. The deadly drug).

Life is just a series of trade-offs.

Carolyn is choosing to alienate her living child to find justice for the one she lost.

Geraldine serves as foil to Carolyn.

She gives us insight as to the emotions that Carolyn internalizes and compartmentalizes. The weight of Kenny’s death and loss of her main lead to find his killer are weighing heavily on her. In contrast, Geraldine shows us the emotions she feels from losing Kenny and through their conversation we see cracks in Carolyn’s facade as she does her best to remain in control. Later we see that Carolyn chose to come home in the middle of a work day to lie down and process her feelings in solitude.

But perhaps that’s not the only reason she is short with Geraldine.

Have you had any visitors over lately?

Maybe she suspects that Geraldine has met with Konstantin without her knowledge. If so, Geraldine chooses to lie to her mother when asked directly about who has been at the Marten estate recently. Of course Lily, Geraldine’s “friend” could totally have been over, but I think Konstantin is a more likely candidate given the suspicious scene where Carolyn saw him walking in her neighborhood just prior to this conversation with Geraldine.

Carolyn of all people understands how untrustworthy he is and maybe is trying to keep all Kenny related information close to her chest in case Geraldine inadvertently divulges any information to Konstantin while she expresses her feelings to him... that is, after all, how Konstantin’s bug ended up on Carolyn’s fridge.

The perception here is that Carolyn is choosing to be cold and not loving towards her children. Maybe her actions do say that to Geraldine but perhaps that’s a trade-off Carolyn is willing to accept in order to protect her family in the future and find justice for Kenny.

We both know who you’re really working for... Yourself.

Konstantin has seemingly chosen his work over his family as well. He had the opportunity at the end of season 2 to slip into the shadows with his family in tow and escape the Twelve. But, alas, Konstantin chose to continue working for the Twelve and keep his family at arm’s length.

Irina notices this and calls him out directly when he tries to tell her that he works for the Russian government and is totally not a crook like her mom’s new boyfriend.

But what we see here is someone that loves living a double life and just can’t call it quits. Or this is someone that’s in too deep and can’t escape this life of crime.

And it’s only a matter of time before they all catch up with you.

Unlike Eve, Konstantin has very clearly picked the dark side. We have seen him choose work over Irina multiple times. He has declined her calls to buy a magnet to bug Carolyn’s apartment, answer cryptic texts, and to talk to Villanelle about tying up loose ends.

Konstantin has chosen to be involved in whatever is going on with the missing millions and is actively trying to stay head of everyone else looking into this. Hopefully he does have a plan in the works to protect himself and his family. But judging from his actions so far, Konstantin doesn’t seem to have this all worked out all on his own.

Who are you talking to?

Villanelle has chosen to work her way up the ranks of the Twelve by “trusting” Dasha to help her achieve her goal. But in this scene, we see very clearly that Villanelle doesn’t trust Dasha fully as she doesn’t tell her she saw Eve in London and she is baking a cake for her girlfriend’s birthday. I find it very interesting that she trusts Dasha to deliver on the Keeper job but doesn’t trust her with information about Eve.

Contrast this to her encounter later on with Konstantin, when he asks her why she is in such a good mood she answers him honestly.

It’s Eve’s birthday today.

She even trusts Konstantin with the information that she is seeking out her family which is something she has not told anyone else.

Villanelle has chosen to trust both Dasha and Konstantin in some manner despite the fact that they have both betrayed her in the past and she has chosen to forgive Eve as well despite being rejected, hard in Rome. When Villanelle gets back from her family reunion, it will be interesting to see how this trust plays out.

#killing eve #villanelle #eve polastri #villaneve #killing eve analysis #carolyn martens #konstantin vasiliev #geraldine #killing eve season 3 #i feel things when i'm with queue

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sablelab · 4 years

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Covert Operations - Chapter 124

SYNOPSIS: Jamie and Claire have been granted two weeks of downtime to recuperate, but where is he taking her? All he will tell her is that it is a surprise.

Chapter 123 and all other chapters can be found at … https://sablelab.tumblr.com/covertoperations

THANK YOU to everyone who is following along with this story. I really appreciate your feedback, likes and reblogging of the chapters I have been posting. I hope you enjoy the chapters to come when we find out where Jamie and Claire are going for their recuperation. Perhaps you might like to guess where he is taking her?

CHAPTER 124

Jamie Fraser and Claire Beauchamp had got out of Dodge as soon as they were discharged. They never looked back as they made their way away from Section One to places unknown for Claire. They travelled in silence, each deep in their own counsel and thoughts as the rhythm of the car’s engine purred in Claire’s ear. She had no idea where Jamie was taking her but she really didn’t care. As long as they were together was all that mattered to her. What she did know was that wherever they were going was never far enough away from Section One. Jamie concentrated on his driving and had his eyes on the road while she sat quietly in the passenger seat and scooting deeper into the soft leather upholstery, she stared out the window at the passing countryside as Jamie drove them further and further away from Hong Kong. Although neither of them said a word, strangely enough, their silence was not uncomfortable.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Two weeks …

When Claire had heard those words from Operations yesterday it was as if time had stood still.

It was inconceivable to her that her superiors would allow them downtime together especially given their feelings about the supposed relationship between the two of them. However much they suspected it may have compromised the mission, Madeline and Operations really had no tangible proof, for both she and Jamie had performed their duties to their upmost ability. Their leaders though, were never satisfied unless there was 100% containment coupled with a dogged determination to have the end game sooner rather than later. It was a huge bone of contention for Madeline and Operations for that result had not been achieved on this mission yet. It was conceivable that the head of Section, in particular, laid the blame for that at their feet, hence his recalcitrance and bad mood at allowing them downtime to recover from their injuries. Although there had been a setback in the capture of the triad leader, Section still had the upper hand. Once the mission resumed, the element of surprise was on their side as the triad thought both she and Jamie were dead. “Enjoy your downtime. Use it wisely to rest and recover for once you return to Section we expect the both of you to immerse yourselves in the Rising Dragons’ mission.” Claire had plenty of time to think as they travelled along to their destination and Madeline’s parting words also echoed loudly in her ears, little knowing that Jamie too was reading between the lines as well. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ It was not unlikely that Madeline and Operations had discussed the viability of granting them downtime, especially when the mission appeared to be in limbo. Heated debate had surely been exchanged between Section’s leaders as to the validity of this decision. The hidden meaning behind their rationale and thinking was always perplexing as Madeline never revealed what she was thinking or why she did the things she did. Nevertheless, the fact that sanity had prevailed was gratifying. The question was why? No doubt her hidden agenda would be revealed when they had to face a psyche analysis when they returned to Section One when their two weeks was up. Judging by the concise look their superior had given Claire before leaving Med Lab he knew Section’s head strategist had ulterior motives. With every silver lining there was often a cloud of doom looming. Both he and Claire knew that when their downtime and eventually this mission were over that they were going to have to pay one way or another. At the moment however, Madeline and Operations’ hands were tied. There was no way known that Claire, or him in particular, could resume the Rising Dragons’ mission so soon after surgery. No matter how quickly he healed, his wound needed time to mend. Claire too needed time to come to terms with what had happened to her as well. She had vested so much of herself into this mission that it had begun to take its toll. He knew that his Sassenach would need time to rejuvenate and find the hidden core of her personality that had been so damaged during her incarceration at the hands of Karen Yee and Jonathon Randall at the monastery. Now they had two weeks of freedom. For several months they had been totally engrossed in the Rising Dragons’ mission and the capture of the triad’s elusive leader Sun Yee Lok. However, for now, all that they had experienced, all they had suffered on this mission had been banished to the far recesses of their minds. It was hard to believe that they had indeed been granted downtime without surveillance, without interference, without constantly looking over their shoulders. Two weeks of normality together with time to be just a couple albeit a couple that needed time to reassess their relationship, but also to mend from their physical and mental wounds. For two weeks they had the time to recuperate, and reassess where they were and if they would be able to sustain a relationship under the watchful eyes of Section One when they returned.

James Fraser knew the very place that he would take his Sassenach for them both to recover and forget. He smiled knowing that they had left Section One behind for their place of tranquillity. He happened a glance over towards his love realising that she was already starting to look better each mile they drove further away from Section One. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Claire’s spirit this morning was uplifting and she felt wonderful. As they drove along, she was reminded of the first time they had travelled together in the early stages of the Rising Dragons’ mission on the way to Aberdeen to find Tony Wong, but the memory of that journey was not lost on her. She wondered if Jamie too remembered the consequences of the trip and subsequent events on Lamma Island that had changed their relationship. She turned and looked out of the window lost in her memories of that journey so many months ago that it seemed like a lifetime ago when they had left the Hong Kong Water Police Headquarters. As they’d sped along the motorway, she’d opened her window to let in the breeze of the balmy day. The air had whipped her hair around her face but she didn’t mind. She felt free, while the atmosphere in the car was relaxed. Driving along it had been so simple for her and Jamie to feel that they were two people on an adventurous holiday seeking out exotic locations just like any other normal couple. However, they soon came to realise that they were not that couple, but Section operatives on a specific task to find the triad member in hope that he could lead them to Sun Yee Lok. On that first mission she was sure there would be another time and another place to explore the boundaries of their budding relationship away from the prying eyes of Section. Perhaps these two weeks of downtime just may be that opportunity to share the private time that they needed for a brief taste of an ordinary life. Although they were away from the visual surveillance of Section One and all other tabs on them, would it be enough to experience total freedom? Would this time be different? Would it be enough time to heal from the atrocities of their last mission? She surely hoped so.

The only downside that she could imagine was would they want more time? Sadly, she really didn’t need to answer that question, because they could never have enough taste of freedom from the life they led at Section under Operations and Madeline’s leadership. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In the confines of the car it was impossible to ignore the man sitting beside her. Claire’s eyes glanced at him from time to time as they drove along the road. At one such time she surreptitiously studied Jamie and the skill he displayed behind the wheel. However, the man of her thoughts was unaware of her musings as he concentrated on driving.

Casting a pensive glance sideways at him, Claire studied his strong hands holding the steering wheel as he guided the car carefully along the highway. She became enthralled by the way Jamie’s fingers were wrapped around the steering wheel. This conjured up memories of how those hands would grip her hips in the throes of passion that suddenly had her thought patterns in a frenzy. The smell of his manly essence was a heady mix too and tantalized her nostrils.

Her eyes lazily caressed his form before resting on where he was injured. She worried about him, knowing that his shoulder was still not 100% better and if the driving would make his shoulder ache but he didn’t seem to be in any discomfort. On impulse she reached up and lightly stroked his face running the back of her fingertips gently down his cheek and along his stubbled jaw. Feeling Claire’s light caress, Jamie looked over at her and held her gaze as she spoke. “I'm surprised.” “About what Sassenach?” “Everything.” She paused for a moment, then said the first thing that came to mind. “Madeline and Operations.” “What about them?” “Don’t you find it strange that they allowed us two weeks downtime together?” He knew what she might be alluding to, but were they on the same page? “Everything happens for a reason.” “Meaning?” “It’s a test Claire. We’ll be scrutinized when we return to Section One. They’ll want to know if our relationship is more than platonic and if it will affect the mission.” “You’re right … but it isn’t platonic Jamie … not anymore.” She cast a shy look his way. “How long will it take them to know we've more than just partners?” “They'll only know if we let them know.” “You said they’ll see it in our eyes.” “We’ll convince them otherwise. It will be possible.” “And if not? …Then they'll cancel us?” Jamie looked over at his love with a serious expression. “That's right. In Section, fraternization is frowned upon for field operatives if they perceive it to interfere with the success of missions. It is seen as a weakness.” Claire playfully taunted him in reply, “Am I your weakness?” His scorching gaze held hers for what seemed like a very long moment. Claire held her breath waiting for his answer. “Yes … and … no. But ye’re certainly my conundrum mo nighean donn.” “I understand that Jamie, I just don't understand why you need me.” Without taking his eyes from the road James Fraser replied honestly. “I don't need ye Sassenach …” He paused before continuing, then looked at Claire with a direct stare. Recognising her uncertainty at what he might say next he smiled holding her gaze as if to reassure her he spoke the truth. “… I want ye with every fibre of my being.”

Claire was profoundly affected by what Jamie had just revealed. There was nothing sexy about being needed and there was nothing sexier than hearing him say that he cared about her. His compliment made her feel desirable, appreciated, valued and loved. Claire could not sever her gaze from this wonderful man. Jamie too held her look realising that his words had finally sunk in.

“I'm still not getting used to you James Fraser.” “You will. These two weeks of downtime will give us a chance to settle in for a while.” “Two weeks in one place … that's a lifetime.” “Where do ye want to go Sassenach?” he teased glancing over at her once more to see the wheels begin to turn in her mind. Biting her lip in thought, she nominated the most romantic place she could think of that was as far removed from Section as could be. “Ummm, an island somewhere.” This made Jamie smile because his Sassenach was somewhere near to the truth of where he was taking her. However, reminiscing a past experience, he replied instead, “How about Rhodes?” Claire was intrigued. “Why Rhodes?” “There's a restaurant at the south end of the island. It's run by a family I once helped.” “Old life?” “No. Section.” “Do they know that you helped them?” “No.” She smiled. “I just love it when I'm right about you James Fraser.” She leaned over and they kissed. Breaking the embrace, she held his gaze with a slight twinkle in her eye. “But we’re not going to Rhodes, are we?” He reciprocated. “No mo ghràidh … not this time.” “Then where?” “Somewhere special … wait and see,” was all the information he would tell her. Pleased with his answer, Claire contentedly placed her head against his shoulder as they continued on their journey. “Wherever it is doesn’t matter one iota Jamie. As long as we’re together is all that counts.”

Suddenly it felt very claustrophobic in the vehicle especially after what he had just said about wanting her. Opening the window for a little fresh air, she hoped that the morning breeze might help lower her temperature. Trying to ignore her bubbling emotions, she looked out of the window and watched the scenery pass by. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

They had been driving for what seemed like hours but to Claire that just meant that they were driving further away from Section One and the constant scrutiny of their superiors.

Sitting next to Jamie, she silently gazed blankly out over the countryside that lay ahead of them. It had been some time since they had passed through a small village or any sign of habitation. Obviously wherever they were going was remote and isolated, just the place where they could be alone without any intrusion. Claire wondered how long it would be until they had reached their destination, but not that she really cared. Jamie had not told her where they were going; only that it was somewhere special. Little did he know that just being with him … anywhere … as long as they were together … was special to her. The slight breeze on her face, helped a little, but these subdued moments gave Claire too much time to think about other things. This was never a good thing because her thoughts often raised more questions than were answered. Trying to understand the why was never easy and accepting things on face value often caused heartache. Her case in point was Operations and Madeline. They had granted them these two weeks of downtime, but time was both their enemy and friend. In her mind there never seemed to be enough time for them to be alone to relax, to enjoy each other’s company, to be themselves, to make love or just be together. There were always timely interruptions from Fergus and the ever ubiquitous Section One. Claire knew that when they returned to Section, their superiors would be scrutinizing hers and Jamie’s every move. Favours were never granted without having to pay the piper, and she only hoped that these two weeks together with Jamie would give her the fortitude she needed to face whatever they had planned for them. But one thing she knew for sure was that Jamie would find the time, no matter how short to be together wherever and whenever possible. He’d promised her that on this mission and she’d believed him. It had happened just after Fergus had interrupted them at a crucial moment in her apartment in Hong Kong. Claire bit her lip and restrained the gasp that threatened to escape as his remembered words and actions registered in her mind of what Jamie had done.

He’d kissed her cheek, then her neck before pulling her down to the bed and capturing her lips in a passionate embrace while reassuring her, “It will be okay Claire ... We’ll have more time.” ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once again, she focused her eyes on the driver and couldn’t take her eyes off of Jamie. She remembered what it felt like to have him seduce her senses until her insides began to melt. His touch energized her and made her come alive in his arms. The clever tutelage of this man’s seductive strokes across her skin, took her to places she’d never been before, and she couldn’t wait to feel his hands on her body yet again … it had been far too long since his touch had burned her skin to utter distraction. The night before last when he’d visited her in Med Lab had left her wanting more and Claire smiled knowing that they would have two whole weeks to explore each other without the dread of being disturbed. Her breath hitched in her throat as her mind became consumed with thoughts about this wonderful man who held her heart in his hands.

Closing her eyes, she was lost momentarily in her erotic thoughts unaware of the other reaction that just sitting in the car was having on her body. The travelling was beginning to take its toll on her. It was no surprise that she was physically exhausted and emotionally spent after her ordeal at the monastery and time in the infirmary. Although Claire fought to keep her eyes open during the ride, she couldn’t. As the rhythm of the car’s engine purred in her ear, she soon began to doze off. Beside her, Jamie took his eyes off the road for a moment and cast a look at his Sassenach. She was very quiet and he realised that his love was exhausted for she had closed her eyes and fallen asleep. Her head lolled back against the head rest and Jamie noticed a blissful smile on her lips. His Claire was free from Med Lab, from Section One and most importantly from the events of the mission. Although there wasn’t that far to go until they reached the airstrip, he let her sleep as they had still more travel ahead of them before they reached their final destination. It was just good to see that she had relaxed, although he did wonder why she was smiling.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ The real reason behind Claire’s smile whilst she dreamt was a kaleidoscope of emotions and memories of what Jamie could do to her body which stirred in her brain. Her thoughts of past and future seduction soon had her in a remembered rapture of his loving hands and how they could turn her inside out with just a tender glide or touch to her body.

She could vividly remember Jamie’s electrifying touch as his hands sought the little nuances of her body as the erotic smooth slide of his fingers traversed her skin. The magic of his wonderful hands caressing her skin over and over, made her sigh in bliss as they kissed her receptive flesh. Jamie was a conjurer and the touch of his hands caressing her, loving her and adoring her made her heart swell with a reciprocal love. The way in which he’d gently cup her face before his lips descended to hers in a tender, worshipful kiss was more than a rich memory and it was one she would always cherish.

James Fraser was an exceptional lover who could take her to paradise and to the brink of Nirvana with a seduction of the senses that had her capitulating within his arms. He was a giving and responsive lover who always put her needs above his own and within his arms she felt safe and secure knowing that he would protect her, cherish and love her unconditionally.

Claire shivered with the heat of desire as these thoughts continued to escalate in her mind. Her breath caught in her throat and Jamie cast a glance towards her when he heard her keening whimper. Her lips were bowed in a smile and he itched to kiss them knowing that her surrender to his kisses would send their hearts palpating. But he couldn’t, especially not here in the car. However, Jamie knew that there would be countless occasions to do so on their downtime.

Smiling contentedly, he left his Sassenach to her daydreams.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Being held in Jamie’s arms was ecstasy. Just the thought of his fingers gently gliding over her skin, then up her chest until he’d captured her breasts in the palms of his hands caused her to utter a guttural moan. He’d caressed them until he too was tempted beyond control, then gazing into her eyes he’d kissed her lips as his fingertips worked their magic teasing her taut nipples. She could still feel the sensual slide of exploring hands as Jamie stroked down her stomach, the skin of her back then along her thighs, before digging his fingertips into her silky-smooth flesh.

When she’d felt Jamie’s palms cup her buttocks, kneading the fleshy mounds of her cheeks she thought her heart would burst. Moving her hips in a slow rocking motion she remembered her insides melting. Lowering his fingers, they’d found their way to where she was more than ready to take her love into her depths. His fingers then began to weave their magic yet again and she’d felt the ripples of desire cascade down her spine. On the brink of capitulation, their hands had reached out for each other’s grasping fingers and interlocking them tightly as their bodies moved in rhythmic syncopation. She’d writhed beneath him, rocking back and forth as sensation after sensation riddled her body while her inner muscles clenched him tightly in ecstasy.

Claire let out a garbled moan just thinking of the first time they’d made love on Lamma Island over and over again and again. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ On hearing her whimper, Jamie turned to look at his Claire and asked with a little concern in his voice. “Are ye alright mo ghràidh?”

A little flustered by his question, she opened her eyes and glanced at him. All of a sudden, she could feel the sensation of a rush of blood to her face. She knew that her whole body was responding to her embarrassment for not only were her cheeks flushed red but it seemed that a warm glow had travelled through her whole body as well. Claire felt all hot and bothered.

Had Jamie known what she was thinking? Placing her hands to her face, she could feel the warmth of her rosy flush against her palms. “Yes...,” she mumbled drowsily.

Jamie cast a glance her way and reaching out his hand, he gently swept Claire’s hair from her shoulder and clasped her gently on the nape of her neck. His fingers glided slowly across her skin kneading away any kinks from her little catnap.

“Ye’ve been having a wee sleep Sassenach.”

“Have I really?” she replied a little flustered by what he was making her feel so soon after her thoughts of his hands on her person.

His eyes held hers captive, “Aye … ye have, but we’re nearly where we need to be.”

“And where might that be Fraser?” she teased trying to diffuse the sensation she felt at Jamie’s touch.

“Have patience Beauchamp. You’ll know more when we arrive,” was his enigmatic answer as he continued stroking his fingers down the column of her throat.

Leaning in to his gentle touch Claire hoped that the slight shudder she’d felt as his fingers massaged the nape of her neck had not resonated with him. “Oh, that’s so good Jamie.”

But she was wrong. Claire caught the look in his penetrating gaze. James Fraser knew she had been dreaming of something intimate. She knew he would be able to see it in her eyes. They were a dead giveaway. She looked away from his piercing but amused stare before the looks they exchanged caused him to pull the car over on the side of the road. She began to wonder where Jamie was taking her. He’d promised that they would have more time together.

Would these two weeks be that time? In her heart of hearts, Claire already knew the answer. Two weeks alone would never, ever be enough time.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Jamie glanced over at his Claire once more.

There was definitely something she was hiding from him deep within her beautiful blue eyes, and whatever was going through her mind; it was obviously something she was looking forward to. He was intrigued but his Sassenach had a glass face and he suddenly realised what those thoughts streaming through her head were. He could see it in her eyes. His Claire was reminiscing about the reality of them being alone together for two whole weeks.

He knew that he would need to shift his own feelings for her elsewhere or his concentration would be sorely tested. Jamie stared down at the road and accelerated harder on the gas pedal suddenly in a hurry, for they had another long journey ahead of them after this before they reached their final destination. This time he was on a mission that would be the ultimate romantic getaway for his love and a place she would least expect they would ever go to. Hence, the sooner they arrived at the remote airstrip for their journey the better it would be for the surprise he had in store for his Sassenach and the sooner they could relax and heal from their incarceration at the hands of the Rising Dragons.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~to be continued FRIDAY 29th Ma

#Jamieandclairefanfic #jamieandclairecrossover #jamieandclaireau #the lallybroch library #outlander fanfic #LFNoutlander #covertoperations

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peace-coast-island · 3 years

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Diary of a Junebug

Taking our sweet time (seriously, there's no need to hurry)

Whenever life gets too much to handle it should be socially acceptable to say fuck it and peace out for a while. I get that constant procrastination isn't good but sometimes you really need to step back and take a goddamn break.

You don't have to take on the world all at once - in fact you don't have to do anything at all just to feel worthy of something. It's the little things that matter and your worth shouldn't be measured solely by your achievements. There's nothing wrong with being average - or even below that - what should matter is that you're happy and doing what you like.

At least that's what I'm hoping to get across to Pai and her adventuring companions. From burnout to things not going as planned due to factors out of everyone's control, they are definitely in need of a break.

Pai's stepping into the world of perilous adventuring after running across Connie, a wanderer who's made a name for themselves in Bonsai Harbor. Connie's from another world, having been separated from their sibling. Along the way, they saved Pai from being eaten by a slime crystal monster, so now Pai feels indebted to them. They haven't known each other for too long but they act like old, playfully bickering buds.

While trying to find their footing, Pai suggested seeking help from the Knights of Windwail and the Adventurer's Guild. Then they got wrapped up in adventuring, world quests, and earned the status of honorary knights. Along the way they came across other adventurers from the Knights and the Guild, forming their own adventure team.

Amber was the first friend Connie and Pai made at Bonsai Harbor. She was the one who taught Connie how to use a wind glider as well as the ins and outs of the city. As an outrider of Windwail and master pyro archer with ties to the Adventurer's Guild, she got them covered. Pai says that they're lucky they ran into Amber as she knows a lot about pretty much everything Bonsai Harbor. It's fun listening to her talk about her home, the other team members, and their latest adventures - she's basically the group's spokesperson.

The second friend they met is also a knight, Captain Lucien, also known as Luci to friends and elders. He's a well known swordfighter with piercing cryo powers that can freeze anything for a short time. Luci was a big help for Connie and Pai when they got cornered by fireball slimes. In return, the duo offered to help him retrieve a stolen katana, which resulted in them discovering other lost weapons and earned the trust and respect of the head of the Windwail Knights.

Noelle and Bennett were next to join the gang of adventurers, coming to them at the right time by chance. Connie, Pai, Amber, and Luci were ambushed on the outskirts of the city while on an investigation when their reinforcements came to the rescue.

Pai summoned Noelle by accident as she happened to be nearby when things were going south. Noelle is who they call a maid without a master - meaning she does things like cleaning, cooking, and running errands for pretty much anyone who calls for her. Rumor has it that one can easily summon Noelle just by calling out her name to the wind, which is what Pai did. As a fighter, Noelle can summon a geo shield that provides healing powers when activated, plus she's got a badass looking claymore sword that's not only great for fighting off enemies, but also for mining and destroying obstacles.

Bennett also happened to be nearby when the gang was attacked. He's an adventurer with pyro powers who hasn't had too much luck in recruiting members for his group. He's a good fighter, but for some reason things never really work out in his favor, so that's why no one seeks him out. It's a shame because he's a sweet and likable guy but his bad luck overshadows the good. Up until meeting Connie and Pai, he was considering giving up as an adventurer because he wasn't getting anywhere. Then he heard Pai screaming for help and came running along.

Since Noelle and Bennett didn't have anything better to do, they decided to tag along. Noelle still gets summoned once in a while, mainly for menial tasks that don't take too much out of her day. Of course, with the gang being all the way over here at the camp, they're all on vacation from their jobs - most for the first time in years, if ever.

It's a good thing Pai dragged them out here because they all deserve a vacation. And not only that, they deserve regular vacations - time where they can breathe and do nothing without feeling guilty. Given what they've all done over the past several weeks, it's no wonder they're feeling burnt out.

After saving the city and earning the status of honorary knights, Connie and Pai set out to explore the nearby city of Starcatcher. Before heading off, they gained another member - Seraphina the idol of the Windwail Church. She's got hydro powers and the ability to heal. She was the one who helped Connie sneak into the cathedral basement to retrieve a cursed artifact and came to the rescue in the nick of time by healing the gang during a showdown with a monster terrorizing the city.

At Starcatcher, the gang met up with Xingqiu and Xiang. Connie and Pai had met Xiang earlier when she was visiting the harbor and helped her gather ingredients for a cooking contest. Connie was hoping to run into Xiang again in the near future so as soon as they arrived at the city, they went looking for her. Apparently they just missed her as she was out on another culinary adventure.

Then Connie and the others were caught up in commissions there, getting familiar with the city. While searching for a rare book, they met Xingqiu, a descendant of a once prosperous family who helped the gang get through the red tape for intel. He's a master swordfighter with hydro powers that can form powerful whirlpools. Pai and Luci were a bit skeptical of him as he seemed to pop in and out whenever he wanted without explaining, but in the end he earned their trust.

Xiang finally met up with the gang not too long after they finished a mission involving finding jade fragments in the ruins. She joined just in time to help take down a bunch of ruin guards, except that didn't go so well. The gang barely made it out alive before having to retreat and Sera and Noelle's healing powers can only help so much. So they decided to put that off and focus on other missions.

But then the quests started to pile up as more of them were beyond their scope. According to Luci, all of them are capable fighters - on their own. As a team, their biggest problem is that they're too slow, especially when it comes to fighting large monsters like ruin guards. The problem lies with efficiency - the team lacks coordination. That, along with the group not being the most prepared or equipped - the latter is something they're trying to fix - is what's dragging the team down.

Though, to be fair, no one really knows what they're doing. After all, Pai and Connie met by chance and their team just kinda fell together. We don't know if we're getting any closer to helping Connie reunite with their family, which is the main reason why they're going on all these missions. As for the others, they're just there for the ride, not knowing exactly what they're doing either, but are more than happy to help when needed.

I have to say, I'm flattered that Pai decided to take Connie and the others all the way here. I don't know where Bonsai and Starcatcher are other than really, really far out there. Pai doesn't really come out here much - I think she only comes to see Jamie, so I'm guessing that's how she knows about the camp. I also heard it's not easy to travel from where's she's from as they're pretty much like different dimensions, making it even more impressive.

So far, I think the break's been helping out a lot. It's been nice getting to know the others and just hanging out with them. Again, it's kinda sad that most of them had never taken a vacation before, so the idea of leisure took some getting used to. Aside from introductions, we mostly steered away from talking about quests and missions.

Noelle, of course, enjoys running errands. She likes collecting fruit, fish, and bugs, and getting to know the campers. Noelle kinda reminds me of my mom as she finds doing things like cleaning relaxing. It's not surprising that she likes speed cleaning videos as they can be satisfying to watch. I wouldn't mind watching videos with Noelle sweeping the cabin or scrubbing the counters - she makes those tasks look fun!

Amber's into hiking and climbing into high places where she can jump off and glide. She's teaching me and Daisy Jane how to glide and it's a bit terrifying, though I'm slowly getting the hang of it. I think that's the closest I'll ever get to flying!

Now that she has a lot of free time on her hands, Amber wants to make custom gliders for the team - and for me, Daisy Jane, and Isabelle as well. They look hard to make, so the fact that they can be made by hand is impressive. All of Amber's gliders are handmade and it takes a special skill to not only make a glider that looks pretty but also functional. She used to take orders for custom made gliders before things got too busy so she's glad to be getting back into it. I can't wait to see how they turn out!

Seraphina has been getting into impromptu jam sessions with the campers, putting on a little concert every night so far. She's got a lovely voice with a pure sweetness I find endearing. Being out here at the camp has helped her get back into singing so she hopes the nightly concerts will keep her going. Her love for poetry shows through her lyrics as she has a way with words and evoking emotions through imagery.

She says the camp kinda reminds her of Bonsai Harbor, particularly the meadows, which probably explains why she's inspired to sing again. As much as she enjoys adventuring, she misses her home a lot. Still, Seraphina knew what she was signing up for when she wanted to tag along with Connie and Pai. While her roots are in Bonsai Harbor, she wanted to take the opportunity to explore the world around her. If it wasn't for Connie and Pai, who knows when she'll get another chance to do so?

Luci, as expected, took some adjusting to the whole idea of leisure. He's not what they consider the workaholic type - in fact, he's pretty lax - but he's the kind of person who's mind is usually on work mode. He's task oriented, always thinking about getting stuff done, preferably without too much time and effort. It's understandable that he wants the team to be in tip top shape by practicing their fighting skills and coordinating their efforts, but it's not healthy to be constantly focusing on that. After all, the main reason why they're all here is to get their minds off that.

While there will be fighting practices eventually, for now it's best to take it easy. According to the others, Luci's not one to stress out over things, so the fact that he is starting to get a little bit stressed is a warning sign. He was a bit restless and fidgety at first, but he's in a completely unfamiliar place and not doing any adventuring or knight stuff for the first time ever so it's understandable. In a way it kinda feels like post grad life when you're pretty much done with school forever and now you don't know what to do with yourself.

Like Noelle, Luci's been running errands and hanging with the campers. He's been trying a bit of everything - hiking, fishing, bug catching, gardening, building furniture - he's a jack of all trades. So far, he's been enjoying all these activities, especially crafting stuff with Reese and Cyrus. In fact, when he got a look at Daisy Jane's gyroid designs, he wanted to join in on the fun too!

Looks like the adventure team's gonna be back at the camp for a gyroid event (or more) as Noelle, Amber, Xiang, and Seraphina want to design stuff as well. So there's potential for many more visits, which will be amazing!

Xiang's been cooking up a storm - figuratively for the most part. Thankfully, since it's outdoors, damage was minimal - though it's fire so while it wasn't that bad, the potential for disaster was high. Thankfully Seraphina and Xingqiu quickly put out the fires so crisis averted.

She's the kind of chef who likes experimenting in the kitchen, coming up with the most unusual recipes. Apparently the slime creatures they fight off leave essences that can be edible, so she keeps vials of them. Fire ones are spicy, wind ones have a dry, bitter flavor, icy ones are kinda minty with a hint of honey, water ones are umami - it's interesting to learn about. Other unusual ingredients Xiang has on hand are ground up boar horns, jade sparkledust, snowflake ash, and clearfish scales.

Don't let the unusual ingredients fool you - most of her food is not only edible, but also delicious. There's a reason why the gang isn't worried about starving if stranded in the middle of nowhere. Xiang can even make dirt edible - something which she's trying to do but hasn't figured out yet.

Xingqiu has taken an interest in gardening, which is perfect because I have been once again neglecting my garden. Maybe neglecting is a strong word but lately, other than flower events, I haven't been planting much. I'm trying to keep up with that but it's so much effort, especially trying to cross-pollinate for rare flowers. Xingqiu considers himself a novice when it comes to planting flowers but he's already got much better luck than me with getting rare seeds. I think his water powers have something to do with the blooms coming out more vibrant and full than usual.

He and Noelle have also been into taking interior decor classes with Lotte at the Happy Room Academy. Speaking of that, I've kinda fallen behind on those classes too. Sunny's rank is Legend while I've been lingering at Master - I didn't even know there was a Legend rank until Sunny told me.

Well, just because I run the camp doesn't mean I can do everything. I've tried, but as the camp grew, I had to learn how to prioritize. While I can put in some time to gardening and catching up with Happy Room Academy classes, they're not something I really want to do. As for gardening, I kinda have a love-hate thing so tending to that feels more like a chore than a fun activity. I'm not the best at gardening and I'm okay with that.

As for Connie, they've been working nonstop since meeting Pai. They've kinda fallen into the leader role by default and as a result has been under a lot of pressure. They mentioned feeling a bit guilty, like being miscast in a role or something. There's also the fact that Connie pretty much started from the ground up, so they worked extra hard to earn everyone's respect as well as be able to fight in combat on the same level as the others. They've done so much in such a short time, Pai was right in trying to get them to slow down.

Like Luci said, they're all capable fighters, but as a team they still have a lot to learn. To put it bluntly, compared to other adventurers in terms of combat and strategy, they're pretty average. All of them admit they're a bit of a mess - then again, who isn't? As much as they have accomplished together, there's always a voice in the back of their minds questioning whether they could've done better. And it's not just themselves, it's also the societal pressure to not only do well, but to exceed and be the best. While that tries to be a motivating message, it does more harm than good.

That brings me back to my main point - you don't have to be exceptional at what you do. It's a message I'm still learning myself, especially since I grew up in a culture where I'm told that I'm not trying hard enough if I'm not constantly pushing my limits. Despite what society wants you to think, it's okay to be average, to just be.

After all, none of them chose to adventure for status and prestige - they're pretty much here because they seek excitement and want to help Connie. As for Connie, they never expected to become somewhat a hero in Bonsai Harbor and Starcatcher, they just wanted to help others. So what if they stumble more than fly? Just because all of them can't take down a massive monster doesn't make them less capable as adventurers - it just means combat isn't one of their strong suits yet - and that's okay. After all, they're still getting to know each other and such.

For now, we're all just gonna take our sweet time just chilling out. Self-care's important, but sometimes we get so caught up in everything else that we put ourselves last.

#animal crossing #animal crossing pocket camp #Diary of a Junebug #headcanon ramble

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minervahopebeyond · 4 years

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Blood Daffodils.

Chapter 14: The letter.

It was a very normal dinner when they had an epiphany about Death’s request, well... actually Padfoot had it but it still counted.

“It could be the Hallows, I mean we have one of them-“ His godfather started to say and his dad sighed with exasperation.

“Not this again.”

“What?” Draco asked curious took a sip from his glass.

“It’s nothing, Sirius always had this stupid idea that the invisibility cloak is the invisibility cloak-“

“The one from the Tale of the Three Brothers?” Ron asked excitedly, his face matching Malfoy’s. And, once again, Hermione and Harry didn’t have the slightest clue about what the rest of them were talking about. Being muggle-raised sucked.

“Where have I read that before...?” Hermione asked, a frown on her face.

“Dumbledore left you a copy of The Tales of Beedle the Bard. It’s from that book.” Draco answered calmly.

Oh, great, so Harry was the only one who didn’t have a clue about what was going on.

“It totally makes sense! Harry, your cloak, the charm never fades... even the best ones get old and don’t work as well as they did when they were bought. Since when has the cloak been in your family, Mr. Potter?” His dad squinted his eyes, trying to calculate.

“That I know of... I guess that my great- grandfather had it and passed it on.”

Draco widened his eyes, an amused smile appearing on his face. Harry loved to see him like this, so in his element. So focused to achieve his goals and so happy when he discovered something useful. Sometimes he had to think about something else in the meetings, because if he paid attention to Malfoy... He started to get this itchy feeling on his lips, wanting to snog the hell out of the boy right in front of everyone.

“Okay, so let’s assume we have the cloak... What else do we have? She said it was two things.” Draco said as he stood up and leaned against the table. He never could be still when he was figuring out something, he always was moving, walking, jumping in his place, his feet’s were always alert, ready to do whatever it was needed at the time. It was one of the things that Harry liked best about the boy.

“If the hallows exist, I want the Elder wand. Imagine having that, we would win for sure.” Ron said, a wishful tiñe in his voice.

“I’m not on board with being murdered for power, thanks. Been there, done that.” Replies his dad, making Sirius’ and Draco’s laughter echoed in the kitchen.

“I think I would want the stone... Jamie is here with me, but Regulus isn’t... It would be nice to tell him that I destroyed the horcrux he stole.”

Okay, Harry was really not understanding anything. He turned to look at Hermione and her face of confusion told him that she didn’t had a clue either. Maybe the name of the tale was familiar but if Hermione Jean Granger wasn’t participating in a conversation, then she most definitely didn’t understand what they were talking about.

Then, Draco widened his eyes and covered his mouth with his hand in astonishment.

“What...?” Harry dared to ask.

“The stone... We don’t have the wand, no one tried to look for it so we don’t have it, but the stone.”

“I think we would know if we had the resurrection stone, little cousin.”

“Would we?” The blond boy had the smug smile that he loved so much and Harry wanted to slam his own face against the nearest surface just to try to get his brain to work properly again. “What did Dumbledore left you three?”

They all answered, a little tired of going over again the same thing that had been buggering them since August: trying to understand what the fuck did Professor Dumbledore wanted with his will. They only figured out the sword so far.

“Why would he leave you his personal copy of The Tales of Beedle the Bard if it didn’t mean anything. Why the snitch?”

“I don’t know, Malfoy. That’s kind of the point. Scrimgeour said that the snitch would open when I’d hold it because it remembers their first touch, but I grabbed it and nothing happened...”

And Draco literally started to laugh saying that they have been so stupid all this fucking time. At this point, Everyone was watching him like he lost his mind (which was possible, Malfoy had been through enough, he wouldn’t blame him for losing it).

“Potter, work with me a little. Think about your first match.”

Harry frowned. He remembered loving every second of it... Except when Quirrel started to curse his broom. He could recall being so obstinate, making every single thing to catch the snitch, even as a first year, even if it was his first match. He remembered reaching out, so close to touching it with his fingers when... Holy shit. He widened his eyes and looked at Malfoy who was grinning like a mad man.

“I didn’t catch the snitch with my hand...” I said, realizing what he meant this whole time.

“You nearly swallowed the thing. I wanted to punch you in the face for that one.” He replied happily and Harry couldn’t help to look at him fondly.

Did Draco think back then that he was cute too? After their fight he had confessed that he found Harry the most attractive bloke in school and, when he heard it, his heart almost came out of his chest.

Take that Nott, he notices me and he likes me the most... At least physically.

What was a little disappointing, was the fact that what Draco thought about how he looked like had nothing to do with his feelings. Harry was glad that the boy found him attractive but, at the end of the day, he wanted for the blond boy to choose him first in every sense... which was not happening.

On Valentine’s Day, he tried to ask Malfoy out on a date. Not that they could go anywhere but his father said that him and Padfoot were having a romantic dinner, so the four of them needed to find another thing to do. Call him naive if you want, but Harry supposed that Ron would want to spend it with Mione alone, that left him and Draco to have a nice time for themselves in his room... And he started to plan it all: which album of Queen they were going to dance to, what would they eat in his room, at what point he was going to kiss him, and just imagining the smell of the daffodils filling his room was enough to put a goofy smile on his face. When Harry suggested to cook some pizza and take it upstairs, he was not pleasantly surprised to find out that Draco had actually planned an evening that included the four of them. At least they got to spend the night together, that was something, right?

“Potter.” Draco said, snapping his fingers in front of his eyes. He blinked repeatedly, as he came back from his thoughts. “Go fetch that Snitch.” He commanded and the green-eyed boy complied.

It turned out that a message appeared if Harry put the snitch in his mouth ‘I open at the close’ Nobody seemed to understand it, Ron only said that he was getting quite tired with Dumbledore’s Riddles. He couldn’t blame him, really.

“So you think that the stone is there, Kid?”

“Yes. Although we can’t do anything until it opens...But at least we know what’s going on... kind of.”

And after they started to assume that the Hallows were real, that one vision that he had about Voldemort torturing Gregorovitch for a wand that he could not find... It was finally starting to make sense. At least, now, Draco and Mione couldn’t be mad at him for letting him into his mind, because they had advantage, they knew what to expect when they would come across him again... Maybe he would carry the Elder Wand with him.

—————————

He was kissing Draco lazily that morning, he loved to do that. He loved to feel like the mornings were an extension from his dreams, this reality where he got to wake up with the blond boy’s arms around him. For a few minutes, he could pretend that this was permanent, that this was the way that he was going to wake up for the rest of his life.

The thing was that Harry had started to have hope, for a multitude of reasons. One being the smile that Draco offered him on these very same mornings, so truthful and warm. Another one being that confession about him being the highest rated boy in the list (yes, he was pretty proud of that). And, on top of everything, they were acting a lot like a couple lately... they would hug more, or kiss more, or hold hands a lot... Ron always had this annoyed expression on his face whenever he saw them together. Harry was aware that he was doing something wrong with Malfoy, he could live without the redhead wearing a scowl constantly on his face.

Draco separated their lips a little bit, just enough so he could talk.

“We should get up, training starts in like half-hour and we haven’t eaten yet.” Harry groaned and kissed him again, biting his bottom lip playfully.

“Or... We could stay here and skip breakfast.” Because, really, he could live without it and this was a much more entertaining thing.

“You can’t skip meals, Potter. We talked about this.”

This was another reason why he was getting hope, Draco was dying he had his own problems, and still, he found time to take care of Harry... To talk about the importance of a good nutrition and to come and spend the night with him whenever he realized that it was almost midnight and Harry wasn’t even attempting to get into his bed. Sleeping was overrated if you asked him, he spent six years of his life sleeping four hours each night and he was doing pretty well. Malfoy didn’t agree with him, though.

“You are such a killjoy.”

“Yes, now get up.”

The day passed by pretty smoothly. There wasn’t anything weird about it, no drama, no tantrums, no Ron and Hermione arguing about stupid stuff, and the more important thing ever: no coughs. None. Not even a small one. Harry seemed to be on Felix felicis again given the fact that he was smiling and skipping around the house from the happiness alone.

That was why it felt like such a punch to the gut to find the parchment on Malfoy’s desk.

They rarely spent time in Draco’s and Ron’s room. Probably because it was difficult to be alone in a room that was shared. The blond boy was in the shower, Ron was downstairs with Mione (he couldn’t go and interrupt them) and he was bored. He actually went into Draco’s room because he couldn’t find one of the vinyls, and since the blond boy tended to hoard as much of them as he could... He guessed that he could go and have a look around.

Now, Harry was regretting to ever had entered the room. His eyes were fixed on the parchment, Malfoy’s beautiful letter displayed on it. He didn’t even read the letter, he couldn’t. It was wrong wasn’t it? But...

Dear Theo:

There was this little voice in his head telling him to read it. That he could keep the secret. He was already biting his tongue to not tell Draco how he felt, and that was hard enough, he could keep this to himself too, couldn’t he?

‘No, Harry. This is awful. It’s private, you can’t. Just turn around and go.’

The boy was starting to hate the high morals that Gryffindor had instilled in him through the years... But to be fair, he never seemed to apply those morals whenever Malfoy was involved. With trembling hands he took the letter and began to read it.

Dear Theo:

I want to tell you so much that I don’t know where to begin. Let’s star with the most important thing, shall we?

The Deathly Hollows are real. Remember when we wanted to become the Masters of Death back when we were like five? I can’t believe that it is something actually possible, my prat of a father always made fun of our ‘childish dreams’ but who laughs now, huh? I have a connection to the other side, I can do the old rituals and I have a quest that has been a petition from Death herself.

I can’t help but to wish that you could be here.

His heart started to hurt. It felt like someone was strangling it. He was so naive wasn’t he?

Harry took a deep breath and resumed his reading, forcing himself to read that same line again.

I can’t help but to wish that you could be here. I know that you would love this, the mystery, the riddles... Even in this very obscure context is unbelievingly fun to try to solve this.

I miss you dearly. We haven’t got to spend any time together this year and I fear that we are not going to... Things are too messed up right now and I don’t have much time left. Potter says that he is going to finish this before June but, honestly, I don’t think that it’s going to happen.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

The tears started to escape from his eyes, he moved away the letter, trying to avoid staining it with his tears.

Please tell me that you are being safe...That you are being as cunning and ambitious as ever (well, tell me in a metaphoric sense of the term because this letter in not going anywhere and you can’t respond to it). When the time comes, I hope that you fight with our side. I really really want you to. I don’t know if that still means something to you but I wanted to tell you.

I had a dream last night, about us.

Harry’s heart stopped working for what it seemed to be ages. Last night? Like... The night previous to this beautiful morning where Draco kissed him for almost an hour? Oh... No coughs... at all. Fuck. How fucking naive he was, thinking that maybe he was the cause of Draco being healthy... It was because of Nott, of course. He let out a sob before continuing reading.

We were together at the beach (it looked like the one from Bill’s and Fleur’s cottage because I don’t know any other beach, clearly), you looked at me and smiled, and when I asked you if you were okay, you answered: ‘Yes... I haven’t been for a while...but I guess that I’m okay now.’ Were you really there? I can’t help but wonder if we really met in that dream... It felt so real, I don’t know how to explain it.

Harry couldn’t stop crying. Wishing that they haven’t met there at all. Even if it was a cruel thing to wish... He didn’t want to think that Draco and Nott met in their dreams because they missed each other so much. Not when the blond boy hugged him in his sleep and not when he woke him up with a kiss.

If it really was you, I’m glad that we got to see each other. At least like this.

Be safe... and try to laugh. It truly was a vision to see you showing off that beautiful smile of yours. You deserve to be happy.

Draco

He heard the water in the bathroom stop running. Harry left the letter where it was and abandoned the bedroom as fast as he could. He couldn’t go back to his room, Malfoy was probably going to look for him after he got changed. And he was crying his heart out. So bloody pathetic.

He changed his direction and started to walk down the hallway to knock on the door of the main bedroom. He heard a ‘come in’ so he opened the door and close it behind him once he was inside. He raised his eyes. Padfoot had a book in his hand and his father was resting his head on the man’s lap, both of them looked at him and froze.

“Harry...?” His dad asked with fear in his eyes.

“Can-“ Another sob escaped his mouth. “Can I stay here? I- I just-“

And he was being pulled into a hug. The nicotine smell was invading his nostrils.

“Muffliato. Please.” He begged, because the idea of Malfoy finding him crying like a little boy in his parent’s arms was embarrassing enough, he didn’t need for it to actually happen. His father complied and gestured for him to sit on the bed with them.

He wanted to scream from the pain. It was so fucking unfair. The tears kept coursing down his cheeks, he had to take off his glasses because it was impossible to see with them anymore, all tarnished from his crying.

“What happened?” Padfoot asked calmly, Harry only shook his head. He didn’t want to tell them. “It’s Draco, isn’t it?” And that only made Harry cry even harder which, he supposed that it confirmed Sirius’ suggestion.

His father tried to ask what was it that Draco had done but his godfather cut him shortly, saying that Harry would talk if he wanted and when he wanted.

After a while, he started to get this painful feeling in his chest. The anguish that got settle inside of him was starting to feel like an overwhelming wave that was crushing every single bone in his body. He needed to speak, he needed to talk to someone.

“He writes to him.” He whispered, his voice weak and thin. “I know I shouldn’t have read it, but I did. He thinks that they met in dreams-“ He said chocking as he let out a sobbing sound. “ Draco spent the night with me and he met in dreams with him. Isn’t that so fucking romantic?”

“Oh, Harry... Hou don’t know what that means for them-“

“He says that he misses him dearly. That he doesn’t believe that I’m going to finish this before June, even though I’m fucking trying” He cleaned his eyes with the back on his hand. “I know it’s really shitty of me but sometimes I wish that he would choose me. And I know that it’s wrong because it’s going to kill him. I fucking know it, but I want it. I want him to write letters to me, I want him to be with me, I want for him to sleep beside me and not think about someone else. I want him for myself and I can’t have that so I take whatever it is that he can give me.”

“I know, Prongslet. I totally get it.” Sirius said as he played his his hair, soothing him. His dad was rubbing his back... It felt so good to have them near. He couldn’t imagine what it would be of him going through all of this without them...

“You know...” His father started to say. “It’s possible to be in love with two people at once.” Oh for fuck’s sake.

“Oh, yeah? Was that what happened to you?” He spat out his response. He knew that it wasn’t fair, much less to his dad and with Padfoot right beside him... But he was just so fucking angry and sad.

“Yes...” His father answered with honesty, Harry could feel the hand of Sirius tense for a second before resuming to run his fingers through his hair. “After school, I kept dating Lily and eventually fell in love. When she got pregnant I asked her to marry me, and then you arrived... There wasn’t a single day where I didn’t love Sirius, though.”

“That’s just sad.” He replied stubbornly.

“Is it? It gave me you... with your beautiful green eyes and your mother’s sass.” He heard Sirius chuckling so he relaxed. Maybe they really talked about this... Maybe it was okay now. “What I mean is that love is a million different things, you always love people differently, even when you are in love. Maybe it’s not going to happen tomorrow but... what if you turn out to be the one who spends the rest of his life with him? Would it really matter if he had Hanahaki for someone else?” Harry groaned.

“You don’t get it. You just don’t. I want for him to love me like he loves him. I know it’s fucking cruel, alright? But I want for him to love me so desperately that he would get the same squeezing feeling around his heart that I have everytime that I imagine them together. At this point, I’m bloody surprised that I’m not the one with the Hanahaki.”

“Okay... Prongslet?” Harry looked up. “How about you tell him how you feel?” He was about to respond but Padfoot cut him short. “I know what you are going to say: he doesn’t love me back and yada yada yada, BUT there is this very” And the man child coughs trying to hide the word ‘huge’.

“Sirius” His dad said in a reprimanding tone.

“What? I was just coughing. Anyway there is this possibility where you are.. you know... wrong.”

“About what? Maybe he has some feelings for me, which I doubt: I was barely mentioned in the letter-“

“Maybe he has THE feelings for you, you bullheaded oblivious very-son-of-your-father Potter.”

“SIRIUS.”

“What, James? They are worse than us! That’s saying something”

Harry started to get up, cleaning the rest of the tears with his sleeve and putting his glasses on.

“Hey, where are you going?” His father asked as soon as he started to walk to the door.

“Away from you. I don’t need you to give me hope when I know that I’m going to end up heartbroken.”

And he was closing the door behind him when he heard Padfoot yell.

“You know who said the very same thing at Grimmauld??” But whatever he was about to say was interrupted by him slamming the door.

———————-

Later that night, Harry found himself alone in his room and looking at the ceiling. His head was filled with images of Malfoy and Nott together at the beach, smiling to each other...

‘Potter says that he is going to finish this before June but, honestly, I don’t think that it’s going to happen.’

The thing was that he really wished to have a shot at being with Draco. That could only happen if they finished this on time and after they destroyed the locket, they were pretty stuck. The only clue that they had was Bellatrix...

They needed her wand to get to inside of the vault. What could they do? Steal it? They needed to be near her for that... Malfoy Manor was the place were the Death Eaters meeting were being held, he knew that because Draco told him, maybe if they infiltrated that Manor, they could get the wand... Or even her hair, with how much polyjuice Malfoy and Mione had brew in the last months they could do whatever they wanted.

But if they went inside of the Manor, Draco wasn’t coming with them. Not in a million years. Harry feared how his family would react if they saw him. Sirius and dad weren’t an option either, much to his dismay, someone needed to stay here with the blond boy and take care of him... And even if everything went wrong and he wouldn’t get to come back from this one, they would take care of him and Draco could be with Nott without Harry being in the middle of it all. He could actually let them be happy...

He needed to talk to Hermione and Ron about this. He just hoped that they would agree with him.

Sometimes being the good and selfless Chosen One sucked.

#drarry #fanfic #fanfiction #prongsfoot

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thetranquilteal · 4 years

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The Gift [AO3] by @thetranquilteal

Jamie has spent almost every night of his deployment yearning to be with his wife and newborn child. When he is given the opportunity to be home for Brianna's first Christmas, however, he unexpectedly finds himself torn between the past, present and future.

A modern day short story inspired by @thelallybrochlibrary Holiday Prompt: "Soldier Jamie returns from his deployment in time for Brianna’s first Christmas” submitted by @becc127.

Part I: Home For Christmas

Jamie looked down at the photograph resting in the palm of his hand.

There sat his beautiful wife, their brand new wean resting in her arms. The stark contrast between Claire’s dark and unruly curls lightly brushing their daughter’s red tuft was only highlighted by Claire’s dark blouse and the cream coloured crochet blanket she had wrapped Brianna in.

He chuckled to himself and raised his eyes as if to follow the sound carrying away with the wind into the mountains lit only by moonlight shining through sparse clouds.

He could still remember the moment Claire had announced her name over the phone.

“Brianna,” the mouthed to himself and smiled again. He had made a fuss at the time but it had been token, half-hearted at most, as he hadn't truly minded. How could he? After what had happened with Faith -

He shook his head quickly in an attempt to dispel the thought.

He loved Faith. A Dhia, he loved her. So much so that it hurt to think of her - their first, a daughter born too early, too silent and too still - let alone speak of her out loud and, truthfully, he could only deal with so much heartache on a dark night like this, where stars were dulled by lingering clouds and death curled around them like unwelcome hot breath.

His hold on the photograph tightened as his throat constricted and heart thumped in his chest.

It had been a standard patrol. Standard. There was a scoff bubbling up from within but he hadn’t enough energy to dispel it, instead opting to let it simmer in the barely controlled but well-concealed anger that had been plaguing him for hours. It was supposed to be standard, damn it! Instead, they had stumbled across an IED.

Unmarked. Unexpected. Deadly.

Now, instead of continuing their assignment as planned, they would be departing at first light to escort Angus' body home.

Christ, how he wished he could speak to Claire. Touch her. Feel her. Wrap his arms around and just hold her.

During her time as a Combat Medical Technician, she had been on two tours of her own and had seen such violent harm up close and intimately more times than he would wish upon any soul. Unlike any other Tech here in this God-forsaken desert, however, she had the ability to heal a lot more than just physical wounds. She had hands that wove stories across the skin, lips that formed words to heal the soul, and a heart more loving than anyone - including he - could ever deserve.

From the very first, when she had come and laid a hand on him to reset a dislocated shoulder, he had known - she was everything.

Everything he knew he wanted.

Everything he hadn’t known he needed.

Leaving her, just weeks pregnant with their second bairn, to go on this tour had been one of the hardest things he had ever done and news of a happy and healthy daughter had provided incredible relief. For a moment in time, he was devoid of the burden that had been tying him down ever since he had step foot on the aircraft and the weightlessness had left him giddy with the feeling he could do anything - achieve anything.

But all too soon that feeling had been replaced with something new. A yearning, almost.

A calling.

On nights he managed more than an hour or two of solid sleep, he would dream of Brianna. Shifting within her swaddle, asleep in her crib. Small fingers wrapped tight around one of Claire's. Crying out blindly in hunger only to be soothed by her mother’s scent shifting closer.

The following day the images would linger, there in the background of his mind, as they cleaned their rifles and organised equipment, long after shifts changed and there were no words to fill the silence that fell down upon them, and every time they paused to take refuge from the hot sun beating down upon them.

Despite their continued occurrence, he resisted speaking of them out loud, too afraid that the sound might interrupt the ethereal connection that existed between the two of them. That he might be left even more alone than he already was.

The mere thought made him grit his teeth.

In his youth loneliness hadn’t bothered him - if anything he had welcomed it. First, it was the solitude that came with working in the Highland fields as a teenager and, then, the freedom that came with being an entry-level soldier travelling between various stations and training grounds, never staying anywhere long enough to put down roots or form any serious relationships outside of work.

Then he had met Claire.

While, from that point onward, he had spent his days afield eagerly awaiting their next reunion, their intimate relationship had had very little impact on life in the Armed Forces. It was one that the two of them were used to and one that continued on even after they had wed. When Claire, pregnant and suffering from terrible morning sickness, was released from active duty, however, things changed. It was then he had come to truly understand what it meant to be ‘away’. Away from his wife. His family. His home. And now, another daughter.

One that would be there when he returned.

The thought gave him hope - a small flicker somewhere deep down beneath the bone-weary exhaustion and budding sense of desperation.

The sound of worn boots upon dusty gravel grew nearer and he turned slightly, more so due to a long instilled need to keep anything and everything within his line of vision than simple curiosity.

He shifted again as Murtagh sat down next to him and waited.

It wasn’t uncommon for the two to sit side by side in comfortable silence from time to time but he knew the man, both godfather and superior, had sought him out with purpose.

"Received confirmation from Stuart - schedule remains unchanged,” Murtagh stated casually. “Dougal's putting together the last of the equipment. Thought it would be best to leave Rupert be fer now."

Jamie nodded his approval. While Rupert had not been severely injured by the blast, he remained in the medic station for a long while before making his way to Angus' cot to start packing his best friend's belongings and it had been second nature for the team to unofficially take the man off rotation, wordlessly absorbing any and all remaining jobs between them.

"I should double-check the paperwork's been lodged," Jamie replied though he made no move to stand and Murtagh did the same, having obviously decided it was his own turn to wait. Minutes went by unchecked until he finally said aloud, “I always thought this job couldnae get any harder,” the words spontaneous and providing little to no detail for their use.

Still, his Godfather understood.

“Tomorrow may be harder than most, aye," Murtagh brushed a hand over his bearded chin and then waved it towards Jamie’s own, "but at the end of it, you’ll be home. In time fer the bairn’s first Christmas, no less.”

"Christmas," Jamie echoed, mostly to himself, nodding his head slowly before looking back down at the photograph. “I'll be home for Christmas.”

When Murtagh put a hand on his shoulder and stood, he dipped his head in acknowledgement but continued looking a moment longer, before tucking it back into his chest pocket and rising himself. He rolled his shoulders and stretched his neck - a long practised method used to replace the battered armour he had worn for far, far too long but destined to wear a little while longer yet.

He would be home for Christmas but until that day came, he reminded himself, he had a job to do. And a promise to keep.

A/N: For a lot of people, Christmas is not a time of joy but of sadness, anxiety and distress. There can be an overwhelming sense of pressure to be happy and this underlying notion that expressing anything different is not only inappropriate but harmful to those around us. It leaves many - like Jamie in this AU and myself in real life - conflicted, confused and, at times, hopeless and lost. This story is dedicated not only to all service-men, -women and their families but to all of those who struggle during the holiday season. Please know that I am thinking of you and hope that you, like Jamie towards the end of this story, are blessed with a sense of inner peace and many restful nights. A x

#llholidayexchange #outlander #fan fiction #outlander fanfic #I dinna ken how to tag fic #christmas #jamie fraser #claire fraser #brianna fraser #jamie x claire #modern day au

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going-full-shmoo · 5 years

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First one so good gotta ask for another:)) could you write one wear Tyler Seguins girlfriend is just in a slump and he doesn’t really take notice until he has friends over and he’s trying to make you feel better the whole time they’re there and after they leave he’s super sweet

@kristenyascur hi! I remember you! I’m so sorry this took so long! I hope I did the prompt justice. Fair warning, I was watching the old Charlies Angels show while writing this so forgive me if its a little spacey.

REQUESTS: OPEN

Player: Tyler Seguin

Genre: fluff, i guess

It was very clear to you early on that Tyler was an incredibly supportive boyfriend, even if he could be a bit spacey. There were times where he wouldn’t really notice something was wrong, but once he did, he would do anything to make it better. It was a blessing and a curse, really. There were times you were glad because that way you could have some space to deal with your problems by yourself. However, there were also times where all you would want is your boyfriend’s love and support, and he wouldn’t have caught on just yet. It was really hit or miss, but you loved him all the same.

This was one of those hit-or-miss times.

You had been having a really rough couple of weeks. Your finals for your master’s program were coming up soon. Your boss was forcing you to take extra shifts for your coworkers with basically no extra pay. Your grades had taken a slip because you were barely sleeping at night. You knew the dark circles had been growing under your eyes. You just had to admit it - you were in a deep slump. This is one of those times where all you wanted was just a hug and some loving words from your boyfriend, and unfortunately, he hadn’t quite caught on yet. You weren’t annoyed with him; you knew hockey kept him preoccupied and he had a life of his own. You just had to hope he would find out sooner or later, because you were running out of energy to tell him.

Tyler was hosting a team barbecue to celebrate the end of the season. They were still disappointed that they didn’t get farther in the playoffs, but Tyler was the master of pick-me-ups. This was just something to celebrate everything they did achieve, and it was very well deserved. You were talking to some of the other spouses, and Tyler and a few of the other Stars stood around the grill. Tyler stole some glances over towards you every now and again, which of course his friends took notice to and chirped him for.

“Hey, Seggs,” Jamie called him. “Is everything all right with (Y/N)?”

“What do you mean?” Tyler asked him, more focused on flipping the burgers on the grill.

“I don’t know. I know there’s been a lot going on. You two have both been super busy, and they look...more tired than usual. I just want to make sure everything’s good.”

Thats when everything hit Tyler like a ton of bricks. He remembers you mentioning all the things that were going on from finals to your work. His heart sank in his chest, and he knew it showed on his face too.

“I am the worst boyfriend ever, aren’t I” Tyler spoke so only Jamie could hear it.

“No, not the worst by far. But, I do suggest that you go start making it up to them.”

Tyler handed over control of the grill to Jamie, beginning to formulate a plan in his head on how to make it up to you. He knew he had a habit of being a bit spacey, and it always made him feel guilty whenever it took him too long to figure these things out. He knew that you would say you didn’t mind, but regardless, he wanted to make things up to you somehow.

“Hey babe,” he greeted as he walked over to you, placing a soft kiss on your temple. “Do you need anything? A refill? A burger? A dog?”

“I’m good for right now, but thanks, Ty.”

“Mind if I join you for a bit?” he asked as he sat on the arm of the couch you were lounging in, right next to you. You nodded, and he took your hand in his, and left a kiss on your knuckles.

For the entire rest of the evening, Tyler was attached to you at the hip. Whenever you needed another drink, he went and got it for you. You felt hungry? He went and made you a plate. He gave you so much more affection than you were used to, and if you were totally honest, you weren’t too mad about it. After the week you had had, it actually felt kind of nice.

After everyone had left, you and Tyler were curled up on the couch in the living room, dogs smothering you from every angle, just taking the whole night in. You felt more relaxed than you had in the past week. However, you knew at some point you had to address the elephant in the room.

“Hey babe,” you spoke. “You don’t have to feel guilty, you know. I know you show your support in a different way than I do, and you have a life of your own. I get it.”

“But I do feel guilty. You’re my other half. I’m supposed to notice when these things happen, and I don’t.”

“That’s not true, Ty and you know it. Even if it takes you a bit longer some times, you are still one of the most supportive people I know. Even if its in hindsight, you always make sure to let me know you’re here for me in your own way. I couldn’t ask for anything more than that.”

“Have I ever told you that you’re the best?”

“Only all the time, babe,” you smiled as you kissed his cheek.

“I will try and be a bit better at picking up on these things,” you were about to interrupt him when he continued. “Don’t even think about it. I know exactly what you are going to say. Just let me love you, please?”

“Okay.” you smiled. You sat there in content silence for a moment, giving both Tyler and the pups some love before he spoke up again.

"I have an idea,” he started. “What do you say we take the whole day tomorrow just for you. A day in, or going out to do whatever you want? We go to bed early so you can get some rest and go from there. Just you, me, and the pups?”

“Ty that sounds perfect.”

“Its a date.”

One short kiss later, and both you and Tyler had to take a second to yawn.

“Looks like both of us are pretty tired,” you chuckled. “Now even the dogs are yawning”

“Wanna call it a night? I hear a bed calling our names, and I do believe that lots of needed cuddles are in order.”

“I love you,” you laughed again. You started to get up from the couch when Tyler scooped you up into his arms, giving you a spin before carrying on walking. This all caused the dogs to go into a frenzy, but you couldn’t care less.

Even if it did take him a bit longer, he always knew how to make you smile. You knew he’d always have your back no matter what. And, even if you try and tell him its fine, he always makes it up to you somehow in his own special way - and that is all you could really ask for.

(A/N: wow...that was definitely not my best work...)

#tyler seguin #dallas stars #dallas stars imagine #dallas stars imagines #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #nhl headcanon #nhl headcanons #tyler seguin imagines #tyler seguin x reader #nhl fic #seggy #jj writes

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tabloidtoc · 4 years

Text

National Enquirer, October 12

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Queen Elizabeth’s 73-year sham marriage to Prince Philip collapses

Page 2: Kanye West is in top-secret talks to launch his own TV network and is crowing it will be bigger than the Kardashians -- he wants it to reflect his lofty vision of what the world should be and to provide a spiritual awakening for the masses but he doesn’t realize there aren’t a lot of people who want to spend hours a day listening to him rant about how the world would be a better place if he was in charge -- meanwhile Kim Kardashian is at the end of her rope again

Page 3: Furious Angelina Jolie is tearing into Brad Pitt’s new girlfriend Nicole Poturalski blasting her as a scheming psycho and as a borderline stalker who is dating Brad just to get famous and it’s going to end in disaster for the whole family not just him so she’s already told Brad to keep Nicole away from their kids and she’s looking to make this part of their ongoing legal case

Page 4: Newly single Kelly Clarkson has enlisted fellow country star Maren Morris to help her find a new man -- Maren advised Kelly to use her talk show to connect with men she admires but Kelly may have taken her advice a little too literally when she had her crush Keanu Reeves on the show and was drooling all over him though she knows it’s probably wishful thinking

Page 5: Ellen DeGeneres kicked off her new season by publicly apologizing for allegations of misconduct on her talk show but body language experts blasted her remarks as tone deaf and missing the mark totally

Page 6: Jimmy Fallon’s wife Nancy Juvonen is furious over the time he spends nurturing his bond with close pal Kathie Lee Gifford -- Jimmy loves to reminisce about the old days at NBC with the former Today yakker especially during today’s challenging times and he worships her and he’s the only late-night host who treats Kathie Lee like an A-lister but Nancy can’t stand Kathie Lee’s constant self-obsessed talk and considers her a squeaky third wheel

Page 7: Cher keeps trying to turn back time with plastic surgery but the results have been disastrous and although she insists her most recent work is a facelift her kisser is frozen and packed with Botox and fillers and lip injections -- she also appears to have had a nose job and a face and neck lift to achieve a smooth jawline and neck and the results have left Cher barely able to move her face and even made it difficult for her to speak let alone sing, disgraced chef Paula Deen had emergency eye surgery this summer in a desperate bid to save her sight -- Paula had been suffering from declining vision for months and was shocked when doctors told her the cornea was dying and going under the knife was necessary to save her sight

Page 10: Hot Shots -- Tiger Woods took a brief break during practice, Leighton Meester caught some waves in Malibu, Kristen Taekman in a New York Jets bikini, Dolph Lundgren doffed his mask after leaving a lunch date in Beverly Hills, Dominic Cooper took his electric bike for a spin in London

Page 11: Cash-strapped Tori Spelling and husband Dean McDermott are back in couples therapy and on the verge of filing for bankruptcy -- they’re in counseling for the same old stuff which is their constant fighting and spending money and work that isn’t happening -- the parents of five were hit with tax liens totaling nearly $1 million and were also sued by American Express over an unpaid credit card bill of almost $90,000 which Tori asked her mother Candy Spelling who is worth about $600 million to pay but Candy refused and after Candy revealed her plans to leave her fortune to animal charities Tori and Dean may file for bankruptcy because they both love to spend, Bravo bigwigs are hoping hotel heiress Kathy Hilton will fill the vacancy left by Denise Richards and Teddi Mellencamp on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and producers are trying to keep ratings high by getting veteran Kyle Richards to recruit sister and former castmate Kim Richards and half sister Kathy -- Kathy is said to be high on producers’ wish list because of her wit and humor and is also considered old-school Beverly Hills and show brass want her to bring a certain glamour and sophistication to the show

Page 12: Straight Shuter -- Demi Lovato at a NYC screening party (picture), when the ball drops on New Year’s Eve in Times Square Anderson Cooper won’t be there because he would rather be at home with his baby boy, The Bachelor has cut all ties with Colton Underwood after his ex Cassie Randolph got a temporary restraining order against him, Teresa Giudice plans to move to NYC after listing her New Jersey mansion but she still wants to keep her job on The Real Housewives of New Jersey and to get around that Teresa hopes to pretend she’s moved into her brother Joe Gorga’s home in Jersey

Page 13: John Legend revealed couples therapy helps strengthen his marriage to Chrissy Teigen and said they keep their romance going strong by communicating and being considerate and listening, Jackie Stallone was more than just Sylvester Stallone’s mom -- she was also one of the world top astrologers and psychics who predicted the fall of the Berlin Wall and Kanye West’s presidential run

Page 14: Crime -- convicted Melrose Place killer Amy Locane is in lockup again for a fatal 2010 drunk-driving smashup that took one life and nearly took another after a New Jersey Superior Court Judge said she got off too easy by serving two years behind bars and sentenced Amy to eight more years in state prison

Page 15: The gruesome house of horrors where Drew Carey’s ex-fiancee Amie Harwick brutally met her untimely end is on the market for $1.5 million and her family can’t wait to get rid of it, Shannen Doherty is in pretty good spirits amid her ongoing battle with stage 4 breast cancer according to her former Beverly Hills 90210 co-star Jason Priestley

Page 16: Cover Story -- After decades of turning a blind eye to her husband’s cheating Queen Elizabeth’s 72-year marriage has shockingly collapsed and Prince Philip is now banished to a remote cottage far away from the monarch -- despite royal courtiers painting a rosy picture of the couple quarantining together at Windsor Castle since March the truth is their marriage has been a sham for decades and they’ve been living separate lives for over 50 years and all this forced togetherness was simply too much for them -- Philip has been cheating on Elizabeth since before they were married and has several love children; he has rumored to have had flings with actress Helene Cordet and Daphne du Maurier and Pat Kirkwood and Jane Russell and Merle Oberon and Zsa Zsa Gabor and Princess Alexandria and Sacha Duchess of Abercorn and most recently Lady Penny Romsey -- there will be no divorce and they will just quietly continue their separate lives to the end of their days but the queen never wants to see Philip again

Page 18: Larry King’s estranged wife Shawn Southwick is demanding $33,000 a month in spousal support because she claims she gave up her music and TV career to marry the frail talk show host and then raise their sons Chance and Cannon, Hollywood Hookups -- Halle Berry and Van Hunt dating, 90 Day Fiance stars Ashley Martson and Jay Smith split for good, Justin Duggar dating Claire Spivey

Page 19: Tom Cruise is set to shoot the first major movie in outer space and he’s headed to the International Space Station in October 2021 with director Doug Liman -- the two and possibly one additional actor will hitch a ride aboard Elon Musk’s SpaceX Crew Dragon capsule to film the unnamed project, the IV needle allegedly used to administer the fatal dose of propofol to Michael Jackson on June 25 of 2009 is up for auction by the estate of the late singer’s father Joe and the chilling item used by Michael’s physician Dr. Conrad Murray is reportedly still stained with Michael’s blood -- it was submitted to the auction by Michael’s cousin Marsha Stewart who says she took it from Michael’s bedroom days after he died, Sharon Stone has pressed her lips on a long list of Hollywood hunks but picked Robert De Niro as far and away the best kisser but rated her other leading men as kind of like meh

Page 20: Stars Playing Stars -- how they did it -- Muhammad Ali and Will Smith, Frida Kahlo and Salma Hayek, Ray Charles and Jamie Foxx

Page 21: Marilyn Monroe and Michelle Williams, Queen Elizabeth and Helen Mirren, Billie Holiday and Diana Ross, Bob Dylan and Cate Blanchett

Page 22: An adopted son of Mia Farrow and Woody Allen has charged it was his mother not his father who was the monster in the family -- Moses Farrow says Woody did not molest adopted daughter Dylan Farrow in 1992 and that he can no longer stay silent as Woody continues to be condemned for a crime he did not commit

Page 26: Less than nine months after Kobe Bryant and daughter Gianna died in a helicopter crash a vicious feud has ripped the family apart -- the row erupted between his widow Vanessa Bryant and her mother Sofia Laine after Sofia went on TV to publicly accuse her daughter of tossing her out of the family home -- Vanessa feels she’s already given her mom so much and then she heard through the grapevine that Sofia complained she should have more -- it does seem cold that Vanessa would take such action against her mother but she’s ready to take on anyone using her husband and child’s deaths as a selfish cash grab and that includes Sofia

Page 27: Danny Masterson’s rape trial is looming and the Church of Scientology is doing everything in its power to back the scandal-scarred actor -- the church’s leaders have assigned their top lawyers to aid Danny who is a prominent member of the religion and the lawyers are scouring every law on the books to get the case thrown out or get him acquitted -- the church has previously been accused of trying to get the other side’s defenses dismissed or judges thrown off cases and using all manner of tactics to delay due process

Page 28: American Life -- Bighearted ex-billionaire Chuck Feeney has spent 38 years giving away nearly all of his vast fortune and the generous do-gooder said he wouldn’t have had it any other way

Page 29: Famed stoner Willie Nelson can’t stop sampling his own marijuana products and now friends fear the 87-year-old music legend is smoking himself to death -- Willie’s a believer in the powers of cannabis and promotes it passionately but years of smoking has done a number on his lungs and he can barely breathe at times, Julia Duffy has been keeping close a tragic heartache for more than a year -- her only son Danny Lacy committed suicide at age 29 after years of suffering from mental health issues

Page 34: Comic Kathy Griffin has seen her popularity plummet in recent years and it’s played a role in her plans to sell her sprawling Bel Air estate -- Kathy has burned a lot of bridges and concerts and TV appearances have dried up because of her many industry conflicts so she’s trying to unload her massive manor with wine cellar and movie theater and eight bedrooms for $16 million -- she didn’t want to sell it but the cost and size have become too much for her to handle

Page 36: Health Watch

Page 38: CIA bigwigs once hired a psychic to determine if there was life on Mars -- the misguided mission was said to be part of Project Stargate which was launched in 1978 and somehow cost an astronomical $20 million after the CIA hired a man who claimed he could see the surface of the planet in his mind -- the unnamed man claimed he could see huge pyramids and an obelisk structure and road networks on the Red Planet as well as living creatures, John Lennon’s killer Mark David Chapman shocked the parole board when he admitted he deserved the death penalty even as he begged for his freedom at his last hearing -- his murderous motive was seeking self-glory -- the board denied his parole saying they found his statement infamy brings you glory disturbing

Page 42: Red Carpet -- London Fashion Week

Page 45: Spot the Differences -- Luke Bryan and his dog Choc

Page 47: Odd List -- doctors remove granny’s football-sized tumor

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