#anyway I wrote a moment between the Veiled Lady and her sister that made me tear up and make a moment's peace with my own grief so that was

[mumblingsage]

Part of the reason the WIP is getting so monstrously long is that every single character has developed some sort of quirk or arc or backstory, including the gods + mythology. And this is low fantasy so the gods aren't even making personal appearances or providing much evidence of their existence! But the mythos/backstory is so much fun to develop that I might try working it into other stories as well.

Anyway this leads to moments like a character in-story going "I really don't think the gods believe homosexuality is a sin; granted the only god I feel a personal connection to is the Veiled Goddess of Death, but She never seems judgmental" and then I'm sitting there like "Wait, of course She wouldn't, She has a wife in the underworld."

#they're loosely based on Ereshkigal and Belet-Seri #no way to get that into the story without adding like a Medium as a side character and that's just excessive #anyway I wrote a moment between the Veiled Lady and her sister that made me tear up and make a moment's peace with my own grief so that was #nice. might not make it into final draft. but we'll see.

[cloudycrystalkpop]

SMOKY | Hell Below

Blind! Prince! Mingi x [unstated skin deformity] fem! reader

Words: 2k+

Warnings: self harm, possessiveness, demonic interaction

au: crown royal au | moodboard

series masterlist: SMOKY

~

Seonghwa paced back and forth in front of your door. He was placed on guard duty this evening and it was slowly torturing him.

Normally he would never complain, more than happy to forgo his own rest to know that his princess slept safe and sound. However, he was very aware that at the moment, his princess was not sleeping at all.

He gritted his teeth as he heard your voice moan out a name in pleasure. The name of your husband. A name that wasnt his.

Seonghwa squared his shoulders. He had made you a promise, one a very very long time ago.

When he was the man having you sing such pretty praises. When he wrote his name in calligraphy with his tongue between your thighs.

A promise he painted into your skin, one very late night. Kissing every patch that made you shy. Every inch that your family frowned upon. Every piece you had ever wanted to burn off.

"I will protect you, until the day my heart stops beating, And surely even after."

he is more than just a knight. No, after holding you, bare as the day you were born, shaking in his arms. After the words of hate and disgust at the case your very soul lived in, at watching you take blades to try and peel the unwanted flesh away, he would never ever let you hurt yourself again.

He would never abandon you, even if you took his heart right out of his chest, it was always yours anyway.

Seonghwa held his head in his hands. He was always yours anyway.

"They sure are loud huh?" Seonghwa jumped and reached for the sword on his belt at the voice.

"Sorry, bad night?" Hongjoong asked, standing before the heartbroken man.

"Yeah just, stuck in my own head." Seonghwa admitted. The other man nodded, scanning him with curious eyes.

"You and your princess sure are, close." he stated. The words curled on his tongue, watching Seonghwa flitched as the sound of a high pitched groan came from the lover's room.

"We... Used to be." he replied.

"I see. Makes sense why youre not so fond of that Duke." he quirked an eyebrow, a sly grin pulling at his features. "Hey, you wanna know a secret~" the man purred.

"Not tonight Hongjoong. Im not in the mood for your teasing." Seonghwa frownd.

"Hmm~ if you say so." his smile pulled into a playful childlike one, before Hongjoong skipped off down the hall, leaving Seonghwa alone with his thoughts once more.

~

Hongjoong purred to himself as he glanced over his shoulder as the knight stood at the lovers door. Lust is a very powerful tool in his bag of tricks, one that, it looks like, will do him very, very well.

~

you spent your days now often with Yeosang, his experience and wisdom helping you greatly in easing your nerves. he told you many stories, explained much about the kingdom you had never dared to venture around in.

whenever you did leave your family's estate, it was always with Seonghwa as your loyal guard. a long veil to hide you away from the world, or heaven forbid you simply, existing taint your family name.

you remembered the day The King died. he was an old man, had been sick for years. while not beloved by his people, he was well respected, and yet. when he passed, no one knew anything about him. there was no mourning, for there was no loss.

The Queen had fully stepped into power then, ten years younger than her husband she was more than capable of leading. and so it had been since your early teens. The Queen was now however, ready to pass her power, rather than see it out live her too, just like her husband.

and that, was where the crown prince and princess had come in. the pair lost at sea in a tragic shipwreck, the kingdom scrambling to find a new replacement. you and Mingi were nobles, sure. second rate royals even, your father once a prince, a second born. Mingi was next in line to become a Duke, chosen over Yeosang for your hand in marriage for, such a trivial reason. or so you thought.

“my family comes from the Valley, My Lady. Lord Mingi’s comes from the Sea.” Yeosang explained, an, almost forlorn look in his eye. “when yourself and your husband were married, it showed a joining of the land and the sea. loosening trade deals with other lands, its... business I'm afraid.”

“that’s all marriage is good for after all anyway. its just business.” you gazed off out the window, watching the roses sway in the morning breeze. the garden was beautiful, flowers in full bloom.

“I’m sorry you feel so my lady. but, you must admit how darling and romantic an idea it is.” Yeosang followed your gaze.

“to be married?” you wondered.

“the prince of the sea, wed to the princess of the forest. and a man who cannot see, tied to a woman never allowed to be seen.” he hummed softly.

“sounds like a horrible tragedy of a play to me.” you shook your head, eyes falling to your lap. “I should have a word with the playwright.”

“would you have preferred a different ending?” Yeosang wondered, dropping his head down to force you to look him in the eye. you chuckled, watching the corners of his eyes crinkle in a smile.

“I haven't decided.” you answered. “...are the flowers in the valley in bloom this time of year?” you asked.

“oh yes. the wild flowers were always my favorite as a boy. my sisters and I used to go out and make crowns out of them.” his voice was soft, eyes far away. caught in a memory from boyhood.

“...will you take me there some time, Yeosang?” his gaze focused back on you once more.

“if you wish to see it My Lady.” he grinned. “I will braid you a crown so lovely the royal jewels will be jealous.”

“promise me?” your voice betrayed you. a crack of pain hidden away there.

such a very different ending you could have had. one where you could spend your life safe, hidden away from the judgment and piercing eyes your mother always frightened you of. flowers in your hair, children at your feet, a husband who could provide for your every need. free to play in the forest of your childhood. there was no judgment from the trees, nor would you find it in the open fields.

“you have my word... My Lady.”

but your life was no fairy tale. you were to be queen of a kingdom you barely knew. sure, you had a husband, a man to wear the title of “king”, but both you and Mingi knew, the queen is the most powerful piece on the board.

~

“My little Prince~” you called to the darkness of the room as you returned to your chambers for the evening. “Mingi?” you cooed once more, looking around for the tall man.

“we need to talk.” you nearly screamed, the voice was not your husband’s. upon turning on your heel, you came face to face with...

“Seonghwa! you nearly had me jump out of my skin!” you huffed, smacking the man on the side of his arm.

“hey! I'm sorry I scared you but, I'm serious.” he sighed, rubbing his arm.

“very well.” you huffed, seating yourself on the plush bed and waiting for his explanation. Seonghwa shuffled, changing his weight from one foot to the other, gaze fixed on the floor. “well? when did you become so awkward?”

“since I had to listen to you having sex for hours last night.” he growled. your ears glowed hot, but you choked the embarrassment down.

“I am sorry, I'm sure that was a bit.. uncomfortable-”

“you don’t get it do you, Princess.” he lifts his eyes to meet yours. “I love you.”

a lump forms in your throat. you do not move, only stare him down, unblinking, unreactive.

“I have been in love with you for almost five years now. I was the one who took your virginity, I was the one who held you when you cried, I was the only who protected you from the evils of this world. and I-” his voice cracked. Seonghwa, your loyal knight in shining armor, the one who had been by your side for the better half of your life, was in tears before you.

“I love you! I'd do anything for you! I've been with you since you were just a young girl! I've stood beside you through everything! and I can't pretend that it doesn't hurt me anymore!” his eyes sparkled with tears, cheeks damp and voice horse.

“... I-” you never got a chance to finish your thought as the door swung open once more.

Mingi stood in the doorway, blank eyes staring straight ahead of him, his face blank of any emotion.

“get. out. of. our. room.” never had you heard the intimidation in Mingi’s voice before. his voice rumbled deep in his chest, but his tone now, was that of a final, deadly warning.

Seonghwa stared at Mingi, shoulders taught, fists clenched. but he didn't say a word.

“...you are dismissed Seonghwa.” you finally broke the tense silence between the two man.

“as you wish, My Princess.” Seonghwa made his way towards the door, stepping past Mingi, only to be halted by said man shoving him against the wood, hard.

“if you dare, to even think of touching my wife, if even the thought of her in such context even passes your mind,” he growls. “I will have you executed for adultery.”

Mingi stepped away from a very shocked Seonghwa.

“she may be your Princess, but she will be your Queen. and never, for a moment forget, she will only be your queen, and she is my wife.” and with that he slammed the door shut.

~

Mingi developed a possessiveness over you, you must admit you didn’t expect. the once shy boy who could barely speak to you, now kept one hand on your person at all times you were together. when asked he said he preferred you guide him over a staff member. but you know by now Mingi knew this castle perfectly fine. he didn't need help or a guide anymore. he was lying.

he also got rather upset if you were left alone with another person too long, without himself or his chosen guard close by. his chosen guard? Hongjoong.

you woke one morning to find bruises so deep on your hips and chest they looked like black ink in the mirror. Mingi was marking you now. like you were something that belonged to him.

knowing who you needed to speak with, you snuck away one morning, before the sun rose. to find Hongjoong.

~

“your highness! what a pleasant surprise~” the handsome man cooed.

“may I speak with you? in private.” you glanced to the rest of the guard, Seonghwa the only one not meeting your gaze.

“oh? absolutely. please, come with me.” Hongjoong lead you out into the gardens, just as the first touches of dawn peeked over the skyline.

“alright creature. out with it. what have you done to the prince.” you growled, arms crossed as you glared at Hongjoong.

“such mean words from the ‘princess’ herself~” he smiled a grin, one a little too long and a little too wide for his face.

“why are you here?”

“what a stupid question! you already know that answer~ otherwise you wouldn’t have asked to speak to me, alone.”

“fine, who summoned you?”

Hongjoong chuckled, one in tone too deep for the voice he speaks with. “the dead king of course. but that was a long time ago you see.”

“speak to me truthfully creature, did you make a deal with Mingi?” you glared him down. while your experience with his kind was limited, you understood the one true weakness they had. they cannot directly lie.

Hongjoong grinned once more, that same unnatural once, the one that extended too far up his face, showing teeth a human man wouldn’t have. his eyes crinkled at the edges in the grin, the white parts of his eyes turning dark as a bruise.

“no.”

you held back a whimper at his voice. inhuman. demonic. bloodcurdling.

“...thank you. you are dismissed.” you blinked, and the man was back as he was. charming smile and handsome features glowing once again in the dawn.

“as you wish, your highness.” and with that, he walked back into the castle. leaving you alone in the garden, a ring of dead grass surrounding where the pair of you had stood.

#mingi x reader #smoky au #prince au #demon au #knight au #seonghwa x reader #yeosang x reader #Hongjoong x reader #mingi au #Seonghwa au #Yeosang au #Hongjoong au #Ateez x reader #Ateez au #Ateez sereis #mingi series #royal au #fantasy au

[princessozera]

Not OM, I just wanted to post here the first ever fic I actually wrote and published

I WOULD LIKE TO SAY AS A DISCLAIMER EVEN THOUGH I PUBLISHED IT LAST YEAR (2 years ago?) I WAS ACTUALLY YOUNGER WHEN I WROTE THIS. I DO NOT SIMP FOR DAMIAN LIKE THAT ANYMORE, HE IS MY SON.

The Only Exception

 (Aged up/Older Damian Wayne x OC)

The seats are filled, the air is comforting, music and perfume floating in the air. Today Rosella Anderson is to be wed to Damian Wayne. But, weddings never quite go according to plan. Talia and Ra's Al Ghul have made it clear they don't like her, on multiple occasions. But with no less than 50 trained fighters and investigators on both sides of the aisle, nothing can interrupt or ruin her special day...... Right?

Chapter 1: Getting Married Today

"Come on, suck it in!"

       "I HAVEN'T EVEN EATEN TODAY!" I whined as Alice yanked the ribbons on my corset tighter.

       "WATCH IT!" Crystal swats away Alice's hands and undoes the ribbons a bit. "Suffocate her and she doesn't make it down the aisle, pack her like a sausage and my hours of makeup will have gone to waste!" She huffed and finish tying the ribbons, satisfied that they weren't too tight.

       "I don't think I ever really appreciated the amount of work it takes to make curly hair not be frizzy," Barbra Gordon says between sips of champagne, lounging on the hotel bed.

       "That's why I don't do my hair that often," I laugh, sitting on an ottoman so Alice can put my veil on and Crystal can help me put on my garter. My maid of honor, Cassandra Cain, came over and tried to feed me some fruit slices. I tried to argue, but I couldn't hold my own as she stared me down. I let her feed me some cantaloupe slices until she was satisfied and went off to finish getting ready.

       "You really are a queen today!" Stephanie laughed as she walked around the room again, holding a video recorder. I tried to hide my face, but she grabbed my hand and swung it around. "A beautiful princess for Gotham's own prince! Tell us, your majesty, how are you feeling, about to be married off to Gotham's richest stone statue?" The girls laughed but I just shook my head at her. "Me, Tim, and Dick are making a documentary for you two. Any words for the lucky man? Anything you want to say to your future self, your family, your future kids? " Whistles and laughs went around the room and I couldn't help but blush.

       "Well, let's take this one step at a time," I laughed to hide my own embarrassment. "Damian," I started, looking directly into the camera, "I don't believe in love at first sight, but damn did we square up on first sight. Not many people can say they had a full on MMA fight with their future spouse within minutes of meeting them. Yet, after that whole fiasco was solved, you've never been anything but gentle with me. People always said we wouldn't last; lava and ice. Water and a drought. Incompatible. But you were the first to look past who I had to be, to see who I was trying to be. You brought me a family, and I like to think I've brought you some serenity. I don't believe in destiny, and I'm not too sure about fate, but I believe in us. I believe that I'll fight for you until the end of time because you'd do the same for me. Because you are my home, and there's no place I'd rather be." I get choked up, wanting nothing more than to have him in my arms right now. I missed him like hell, even though it's only been 2 days since I've seen him.

       "This isn't the time to start reciting your wedding vows silly," Cass said and I couldn't help but giggle. She wipes away the tears that I hadn't felt form, making sure to not mess with my mascara. Stephanie sighs happily and puts the camcorder down, reaching over to hug me.

       "I'm so glad I get to be your sister," she whispered to me, and I hugged back tighter. We both jerked in surprise at the knock at the door. I immediately reached for my bag, looking for my well-worn notebook, but Cass's hand steadied me. Barbra got up, fixed her dress and went over to the door.

       "Who is-" She stiffens up immediately, hand pulling back from the handle. "It's Talia." Stephanie immediately got in front of me, and I grabbed Cass's hand as she reached for her own bag, searching for her gun. I'd never told my friends about Talia, but they took the hint found their way to their respective bags, throwing knives and whips at the ready. Truthfully, I was finding it a little hard to breathe and I doubt it was the dress. The knock came again, more insistent, but no one moved.

       "It's your call Rose," Barbra said, her eyes never leaving the door.

       "Let her in," I tug on Cass's arm and she helps me stand up. "If she wanted me offed, she would have gotten someone else to do it. Or at least she wouldn't have knocked." Crystal and Alice look between all of us in alarm and decide to take the window as Stephanie goes to back up Babs by the door. The door opens, and there stands Talia, as beautiful and regal as ever. She glances over everyone before finally meeting my eyes.

       "Lady Al Ghul, please come in. To what do I owe the pleasure?" I said, fidgeting with my dress. She steps in, nodding to Babs and Stephanie.

         "I'd like to have a word with you before the ceremony," She says, running her hand along the wet counter cluttered with makeup. "Alone," She said with a pointed look when no one moved. That harsh edge was enough to get everyone to cover or flank me again. She didn't respond to this, simply staring at me. I put my hand on each girl's back, one by one.

       "Go, I'll be fine. We'll be right here," Babs stares me down, but I nod back. She caves and starts to leave; Alice, Crystal and eventually Stephanie following behind, after she grabs something off the bed. Cass refused to move.

       "Do I need to remind you that you can barely move your waist in that monstrous dress? She'd get to you before any of us were the wiser," She whispered in my ear, holding my arm pretty tightly. I wormed my way out of her grasp and grabbed the worn notebook from my bag.

       "I promise, it'll be fine. Anyways, I forgot there were 2 more things I needed to do," I flipped through the pages quickly, finding what I needed and handing it to her. "If you could please take care of it? You should be done by the time we're done talking and we can head to the venue." Cass read through it quickly, then looked at me again. She gave a curt nod and walked out as well.

       "We'll be right outside," Babs says pointedly before closing the door. Talia and I stood in silence for a moment, before she slowly stalked towards me until she was less than 6 feet away.

       "Lady Al-"

       "Your still not worthy of my son." oop. Right to the point, as always. Can't say it didn't hurt.

       "You're a commoner, a nobody. No title, no land, not even superior health to your name. You failed classes in high school, went to college on scholarships, and couldn't land a proper role in your field until a year in. Failure, after pitfall, after failure." JESUS CHRIST THIS LADY DID HER RESEARCH. My face burned in humiliation, but nothing I could say now would justify everything she just listed out. "And yet... Damian loves you."

             "I may not like you, but I know how I raised him, and Bruce has done a good job of bringing up a boy worth more than the names he was born into. Wayne. Al Ghul. Damian. I will have faith in his choice, he is not a stupid boy. Foolish and stubborn yes, but not stupid. If he thinks you are worthy, there may be hope for you yet." holy shit, no way, is this actually happening? I'm too stunned to say anything, just grateful that my mouth isn't hanging open.

       "When you return from your honeymoon I expect you to face me in a formal duel and undergo training as necessary," she puts her hands on her hips, challenging me to argue with her, but I was so happy I had to restrain myself from hugging her.

       "It would be an honor to battle you Lady Al Ghul," I say, finding my tongue, stifling my giddiness with a bow, and a hand over my chest.

       "Talia is also acceptable." She says with a nod, taking another step forward and adjusting the skirt of my dress and finally my veil before turning starting to walk back to the door. "My father and I will also be in attendance to this event, but if you ever wish to gain even an ounce of his approval, you'll need to do another more traditional ceremony at a later date." My heart swelled, and for a second, I legitimately thought I was going to break down crying. This was better than anything I could have prepared for. I couldn't just let her walk out like that.

       "Damian'll be elated!" I yelled out to keep my voice from cracking. Talia stops, and I gush on. "I know you haven't had the easiest of relationships, with conflicting ideology and all, but he really does love you, and Ra's, even if he doesn't say it. He looks up to you guys and wants to make you proud. You being here will mean the world to him." I force myself to stop talking before I say something weird or bad. Talia turns back to me, walks up swiftly, and hugs me. I'm stiff in surprise, but manage to hug her back before she gives me one last nod and walks out. Everyone runs back in the second Talia is out.

       "Are you ok? Are you hurt anywhere?" Babs immediately grabs my arms and starts inspecting me up and down for any sign of injury.

       "Don't cry don't cry!" Alice pleads with me, fanning my face to prevent the tears from falling.

       "Talia hugged her, check her back and skirt for anything weird," I look over to Stephanie, who was staring down at her camcorder. Had she left that hidden on the bed? I didn't even notice. But it was so sweet. I could show Damian later all the sweet words his mother said about him.

       "Jesus, you're so teary today," Cass mumbles as she does her own inspection of my dress. When she's done, she sees my tears are of joy, so she hugs me. "Your journal's impressive," she says handing back my heart covered notebook. I'm still choked up and trying not to bawl in relief so once everyone was satisfied that I wasn't going to drop dead in the middle of the aisle, they sat me down so I could calm down while they finished up. I collected myself, the extremity of these emotions leaving me exhausted. I drifted off with the warm glow of my friend's laughter and love filling the air.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

       "No way, you did not fall asleep!"

       "Get up get up get up!"

       "Cass, I'm fully warning you right now. If she falls asleep at the ceremony like this, I'm throwing my bouquet at her head"

       "You might have to beat Stephanie to it," Cass giggles, as she gently shakes me awake. I take a second to reorient myself, blinking the drowsiness out of my eyes, and stretching.

       "Ooh, we could coordinate it though!" Stephanie perks up, "if she falls asleep; Alice and Crystal, take your flowers and make it rain, and then Babs, Cass and I hit her in the head. Guaranteed it'll wake her up!" We all laugh and I get up, taking a minute to appreciate my beautiful friends. It was a debated choice, but the deep purple fit everyone perfectly. We did have to make a few adjustments to Stephanie's overall look though, to keep her from looking too similar to her alter ego, Spoiler. Bouquet in every pair of hands, key cards in garter wallets and phones on silent, we made our way down to the venue.

         "We're only running 10 minutes behind, it couldn't be helped," Babs tries to calm my nerves as I all but start jumping in the elevator. Cass also had to put a hand on my waist to pull me back when I almost ran to my place. She escorted me around to the side doors; the girls and I were coming in from the right, Damian and his groomsmen were coming in from the left. He had wanted to avoid any issue of who should walk him down the aisle; I thought it was cute how he couldn't choose between Dick and Bruce. Cass and I were slow dancing to calm my nerves when the rest of the girls came back.

       "Pianist and minister are ready" -Babs

       "Decorations are gorgeous and on point, everyone is in their seat and there are no fussy children" -Alice

       "Lights, audio and AC are perfect and photographers are also ready" - Crystal.

       I nodded, yes, everything was going smoothly. Of course, I had used everything I had when planning this. I was floating on cloud nine, simply nodding along when Babs spoke up.

       "Has anyone seen Stephanie?" she asks, grip tightening on her bouquet. No one knew so we all just waited around for 5 minutes, everyone starting to get fidgety. Stephanie came back, 10 minutes later, looking a little out of breath and a bit pale, even under her makeup.

       "Ok so there's a situation,- the guys are running late but it's okay they're o their way, they'll be here in 20 minutes!" Stephanie sped through the second half of her sentence when she saw that I was going to panic. I breathed out in relief and nodded, satisfied.

       "I'll make the announcement, Dick probably went overboard trying to do his hair again," Babs snickered and headed into the ceremony hall. We played a light game of ninja as we waited to hear from the guys, but I soon became hyper-aware of time passing. I don't have the best perception of time, I don't even have a good memory, but I caught the looks my bridesmaids were giving each other. 

The questioning looks. 

The worry. 

         I let myself get kicked out of the next round and walked a little ways off, pulling my phone out and calling the number I knew by heart, ignoring the time that read that I was now almost 40 minutes late to my own wedding. The phone rang 3 times, and I turned away from my girls who were really getting into this game, rooting for Cass or Alice to win.

       "Damian!" I sighed in relief when the line clicked. "hey, how much longer do you think you guys will be in traffic? If it's going to be another while, I can have it arranged so snacks and drinks are handed out so no one gets restless. I could also give the pianist a break, he's been playing the same chorus on repeat for the last half hour-" I let my voice trail off as I was met by a stone wall of silence. Not even a joke from Dick or Tim or Duke. I waited him out, after a minute of silence, Damian spoke up.

       "I'm sorry beloved, I can't do this."

         "What?" I asked, but my voice was so thin and breathy I doubt he heard me.

       "I can't go through with this. This marriage, this wedding. It's all a joke. Who even cares about this mess? It's all so... stupid. Pointless."   not a hint of hesitation, voice more ruthless than I had ever heard it.   No. No way. was he serious!? I struggled to find my words, I shook with the pure effort of breathing normally even though I felt like I was having an actual heart attack; tight chest, palpitations, the whole 9 yards. Tremors ran through my body and I finally managed to choke out "Damian-"

       "Goodbye Rosella" the line clicked off and I take a shuddering breath.

       "Rose?" Cass says, gently putting a hand on my shoulder.

       "He's not coming."

          "What?"

          "He's not coming!" I shriek, clutching my waist to stop my stomach from churning but to no avail; at least I didn't have much of lunch to throw up.

           "What do you mean he's not coming!" Babs demands, yelling from where she was

           "shit" 

          We all turn and there stands Jason, looking uncomfortable as hell and very much like he didn't want to be here. That confirmed it for everyone. Alice, Crystal, and Babs started yelling questions at Jason. Stephanie pulled out her own phone and started dialing a bunch of numbers but it seemed like no one was answering. Cass tried to speak with me, but my ears were ringing, it all sounded like white noise. And I felt cold. but hot. but freezing. I raise my hand and draw everyone's attention, all becoming deadly silent.

             "Alice, Crystal. please go tell the pianist, the minister, and the photographer. Give them my email so I can settle up the charges later. Stephanie and Cass, please go see if we can keep the party reservations for tonight. Everyone else should enjoy them, even if there is no.... Barbra, could you please break the news that I... we..." everything got really blurry for a second and the floor rushed up to meet me, but I caught myself on the table before I could pass out completely.

Not here, not in front of them. Don't put them through a breakdown.

               Everyone was fussing, but I couldn't stand here for another second. "Go. I just want to be alone. Please. go. GO!" I yelled and they all dispersed, shooting me worried looks. Cass gave me a long hug before she decided I needed a moment alone.

           "Don't move from here." She instructed me. "Go get the guys," she demanded to Jason before going off. Jason looked at me sadly, trying to find the right words to say.

           "Rose-"

          "Please leave." he walked away without another word. Once I was sure he was out of earshot, I ran with everything I had out of the hallway.

Pardon me is everybody there

 because if everybody's there id like to thank you all for coming to the wedding

 I appreciate you going even more

 I mean you must have had better things to do.

 Thank you all for the gifts and the flowers, 

Thank you all, now it's back to the showers 

but I guess I'm not getting married today

       The perfume is suffocating, overly sweet, fake as plastic, thick as sugar. I can't breathe, but I don't need air to run. Don't stop, move. Move. Move. The ribbons are strangling me. The garter is cutting off my circulation. Gloves are hurting me.  High heels, weak ankles. My rolls of fat spilling out of the dress. rolls and rolls and rolls and rolls and rolls.  can't stand. can't wait, I throw open the door to the stairs and take them in 3s.

Listen, everybody, 

look, I don't know what you're waiting for.

 A wedding. What's a wedding? 

It's a prehistoric ritual 

Where everybody promises fidelity forever,

 Which is maybe the most horrifying word I ever heard of, 

Which is followed by a honeymoon, where suddenly he'll realize

 He's saddled with a nut, and want to kill me, which he should. 

Thanks a bunch, but I'm not getting married

               I scream as my veil gets caught in the handrail, yanking my head back, falling down a couple of stairs. No question, I rip it off. It stings, it hurts, bobby pins forcefully ripped out. The shoes go too, heels are stupid, why are they so tall. Tall and tall and make my knees wobbly. The taller they are the harder they fall. Up the stairs, 3 at a time, legs on fire. Don't stop, don't stop, hike the dress up and keep running all the way to the 50th floor.

Go have lunch, 'cause I'm not getting married

You've been grand, but I'm not getting married

Don't just stand there, I'm not getting married

But I'm not getting married today.

       I slam open the hotel room door, to hell with neighbors. Suffocating, burning, melting heat. I rip off the gloves, scream as I can't get the ribbons out of my dress. I scream, jump, squirm and throw myself around until it finally comes off.

He didn't come. shut up.

He didn't want to. SHUT THE HELL UP

       I felt everything to an extreme degree. Too much. Why am I breathing so heavily? Why am I sweating bullets!? I throw my hair up in a ponytail, yank the garter off, tripping over my own two feet. My phone falls next to my head and the only thing I can think to do is to throw it into the toilet. I grab my honeymoon bag- no, my emergency bag that happened to have cute clothes instead of food, and switch into my leggings and a t-shirt. It's all I had. It's all I could ask for.

Go! Can't you go?

Why is nobody listening?

Goodbye! Go and cry

At another person's wake.

If you're quick, for a kick

You could pick up a christening

But please, on my knees,

There's a human life at stake!

        I'm parkouring down the stairs, jumping entire sections, falling on knees, but ignoring the pain to jump again. Emergency phone in one hand, I order the uber, start the bank transaction, even though I have to read everything 10 times for it to make sense. What do? where go? don't know. not here. One bad jump and I collapsed entirely, but as I scrambled to throw everything back in my bag, I see the plane tickets. yes. away. out. not here. leave.

Go! Can't you go?

Look, you know I adore you all

But why watch me die

Like Eliza on the ice?

Look, perhaps I'll collapse

In the apse right before you all

So take back the cake

Burn the shoes, and boil the rice

       Out of the stairway, but slammed into a wall. Around the corner, Alice and Babs and Crystal and Jason and Stephanie and Cass and Bruce and Selina and Duke and Tim and Dick and Alfred.

Remember when you first met them? He swore he'd protect you but that they'd love you. please stop! I begged myself, think of anything, anything but him. anything but this. Get out, then we can cry, but not here, not now.  I watched them split up, so I hid behind a corner farther back. Steph and Cass took up the stairs. Everyone else was gone so I ran out the back door. Out of the hotel, away from the perfume, away from the flowers, the candles, the dresses. From them.  And by some small miracle, the car was already here. I jump in, only taking a second to notice that it was, in fact, an uber.

       "Hello, ma'am! How are-"

       "Please! Just go!" my voice breaks and the tears start up again. I brush them aside furiously/ doing everything in my power not to start sobbing, but he listens to me and speeds off.

BECAUSE I'M NOT GETTING MARRIED TODAY

(A twist on this song that actually inspired this whole fic)

Chapter 2: On The Run

I'm going to kill him

Why didn't he show up?

How fucking dare he

Was it something I did?

I was nervous too bitch; I drank a shot of tequila and sucked it up!

Was it something HE did? Was Talia lying? Did Ra's kidnap Damian? Why did the boys wait to tell us? Did Stephanie know that something was up? Do any of them even-

       "Ughhhh," I groaned audibly as my thoughts and emotions started to run together. It had been a while since anything left me this.... discombobulated. Exhausted. A mess. I'd almost forgotten how awfully I reacted to being overwhelmed and out of control. The uber driver shot me a curious look but didn't say anything. Keep it together Rosella. Just, go home and.. I flinched, chagrined at my own stupidity. "Get somewhere safe" I amended under my breath, "and then you can have as big of a breakdown as you want. Just, be a stone again. Close it all out. Suppress the fire, drown the noise." I rubbed my eyes, the dry burn giving me the weirdest throbbing headache.

        The ride to the airport was stiff, to say the least. My driver kept trying to talk to me, but my responses were so dry he gave up. He didn't question the extra stop at the bank, even while he waited outside for half an hour while I verified with tellers inside that I was, in fact, the owner of the account and that I was draining it. 

Erase your tracks. You were never here. Are you even alive? 

         Still, we got to the airport as quickly as I could have hoped for and made sure to give him a large tip for his troubles.  I walked through the airport, undoubtedly looking like some pompous bitch with only a stone face and backpack, my actual suitcase left behind in my whirlwind out. I only had some snacks, a Nintendo ds, some stationary things, deodorant, and a toothbrush. I hadn't even remembered to grab my disposable water bottle, toothpaste, or hair brush before leaving. Whatever.

        It was almost flawless. I bypassed the checked bag lines, slid right through TSA (bless you TSA Pre-check), although I did get some looks when they checked my bag. I guess overall I looked like I should be getting on a school bus instead. I sat down at a cafe and pulled out the tickets, 2 first class tickets to Malaga, Spain.

        I'd set up our honeymoon as a complete surprise to Damian. Bruce and the boys had worked so hard to help me clear out a whole month from his schedule. I'd gone through hell and back to make sure all of my project managers could handle any situation that could happen either in making or transporting our different projects out... We were supposed to be jumping cities for a month in Europe. Cities with small populations, so we could avoid drawing attention, but full of gorgeous architecture and delicious food for me; significant art history and cultural relevance for Damian.

       It's going to be a technical nightmare to cancel all of those reservations and getting the tickets switched and sold. Do people even actually do that? But I have to, I don't know where I'm going but I don't want any of them to tra- SHIT. My head snaps up and one quick look around tells me I'm already too late. I spot 5 cameras easily.

       I grab my things and head over to a gift shop. I grab bunches of clothes and accessories off of the shelves, hurrying off to pay and doing my best to avoid cameras now as I sneak off into the restroom. I throw on some atrocious sundress, flats, and a baseball cap, flipping my hair twice in an attempt to make it look like a pixie cut. For a second I consider actually finding something sharp to hack my hair off. 

         I need you to not be a social breakdown cliche for a minute, it took you years to properly grow those curls out. Please don't waste my efforts. Yeah, it's for the better, I look like Dora the Explorer with short hair anyway. Tim wouldn't sell me out to Damian, right? LMAOO he bailed at the wedding you really think he wants to hunt you down?? Or what if Tim wants to find me? Or anyone else? Damian's pretty good at following people. Even then, Babs, Cass, Roy are competent hackers, any of them could find my data and track me down... Are any of them even on my side?... I couldn't help but let out a whimper. I pursed my lips, placing my hands on the cold sink to calm myself. What's my plan anyways? I can't go to any of the cities in Europe where I already have reservations. Too easy. I could go to the Netherlands...

        "But Damian knows where I lived there, because of the time we visited my friends," I sigh out loud, facepalming. "But not entirely a bad idea..."  I say as I start flipping through the different cities I've lived through. Netherlands, Italy, Spain, Germany, France, Croatia, Portugal, Malta,  Romania, Hungary, Austria, are all out. We'd either been there or they were part of the honeymoon plan. I didn't want any reminder of him.

         Actually, all of Europe is out. I've raved about it too much. We've been too many places, we both had too many ties scattered throughout Europe. I can't speak Russian, Talia and Ra's have connections all across the middle east, and the north half of Africa. Jason and Cass had some unexplainable ties across north and south america. With every city I named, I hated myself more for talking so much. For trusting him with these memories.

      Honeysuckle kisses on cotton candy memories.

       shut up. 

      Isn't there ANYWHERE I've lived and worked that my big mouth hadn't mentioned? As I was starting to get desperate and the headache started acting up again, I found actually ecstatic relief. That would be actually literally perfect. God bless my forgetful memory. The apartment I'd never sold. The country I actively avoided talking about because Damian would get jealous.

      I snuck out of the bathrooms and headed over to customer service. I had to work my way past a large group of people. Overhearing snippets of conversation, apparently, their flight is somewhere between delayed or canceled. Inspiration hit me. Give the ticket to someone here. Send them to Spain, let them stay at the hotel. He could follow a cold lead. This would give me enough time to go to one country and get a ticket to where I actually wanted to go. 

     I look around the group. Too many were in pair or more. Some looked very buisness-y type. There! A girl who looked like a backpacker was chilling, glancing through her phone. You're going to sound absolutely mental. I approach her nevertheless. I pitched her my idea, but she was rightfully skeptical. I swallowed my pride and told her a cold version of the truth. 

     "My fiancee left me at the altar. I'm going to Mongolia. I don't want his ticket, I don't want the hotel. Either take it or I'll give it to someone else. Or let it go to waste. I don't care. I don't want it. I'll even pay the name change charge." The anger in my voice came out clear, and by another miracle, she accepted it. We walked over to the help desk and I spoke with the dude behind the counter. He seemed hesitant at first, but he gave me a double take when he checked my reservations. With a brighter smile, he got me on the first flight he could to Mongolia.

       "Will that be for both tickets Mrs.Wayne?" He asked cheerfully before reeling back, caught off guard by my watering eyes.

       "Anderson. And no," I managed to spit out. I signaled for the girl from earlier to come closer. "I'm transferring the other ticket to her, we need to get the name changed." He looked uncertain but went ahead. If he was accommodating before, I could tell he was bending over backwards now to get everything situated. I could see his concentration as he tried to bypass things without having to question me again.

       "Umm, your profile says you've actually been to Belgium before, how was it?" he asked, trying to lighten the mood.

       "Beautiful and quaint. Great place to relax and enjoy nature if that's your thing. I'd recommend Lithuania too, or Leinchestein." I say, trying to keep a light tone. He nodded happily, seeming to take my recommendations seriously before handing the girl the new plane tickets. We thanked him and headed off on our respective paths, the girl taking a minute to hug me.

       " I hope you can heal soon, and wish you a bright future" she whispered to me. I hugged back, trying not to cry again. She bought me a bag of peach gummy rings and left me at my terminal. I dropped some calls out to friends, blessed that they all decided to take one or more of the reservations around Europe I'd had. I kept the details to a minimum but they figured out pretty quickly not to mention me to Damian if they happened to see him. Some small part of me, thankfully more aware than the rest had the foresight to call some utility companies and get everything at my apartment working again. 

       The help desk attendant worked miracles, my nonstop flight boarded less than an hour later and I had managed to keep a first class seat. I sat down and started doodling nonsense in my journal, blasting music in my headphones. But around 6 hours into this 19-hour flight, exhaustion overcame me and I drifted off to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

       "Beloved," Damian sighed as he wrapped his arms around my waist. "It's almost 11, we need to get out of bed," he murmured into my hair.

       "Nooooooo" I whined, stretching further into the sunlight. The doors were ajar, a nice breeze keeping us cool. I snuggled into him. "We're on a vacation, orders from Bruce. And on vacation, you can stay in bed all day."

       "But there might be monsters nearby-" He said mysteriously, catching my attention.

       "I didn't get reports of any- AH!" I scream as Damian proceeds to tickle me. "No! Sto-" I try to gasp out between laughing. I manage to fight him, tumbling out of bed. He laughed at me as I tried to untangle myself from the blankets.

       "That's a dirty trick Wayne!" I gasp, trying to catch my breath. I grab a pillow and chuck it at him, but he just catches it and throws it back. We have a small impromptu pillow war before he taps out after a good hit knocks him onto the balcony. "BOW TO MY PROWESS!" I jokingly declare, jumping up and down on the ottoman. Damian runs over and sweeps me down.

       "Please. Don't. Fall. And. Break. Your. Head" He accentuates every word with a kiss, making me giggle. He lets me go and takes the bathroom to shower first. I head out into the kitchen, humming to myself. I grab some of the fruit we bought yesterday and start making a fruit bowl. I'm halfway through cutting the Jicama when Damian's arms are around my waist again.

       "What are you doing?" He asks, resting his chin on my shoulder. Before I could answer, his grip around me tightened. "Be careful!" He whispered harshly, putting his hands over mine. "Your knife skills could use some work, you could have cut your finger off like that!" He scolded me but I scoffed.

       "Haven't lost a finger yet"

       "No, but you did set your oven on fire. THREE TIMES" He elbowed my side and I pouted.

       "Excuse you, that 2nd time wasn't my fault, remember? Dick broke into my place and fell asleep making fish sticks," I retaliated, squirming out of his grip and started making some sandwiches for lunch.

       "I really should improve the security at your apartment," Damian says as he finished cutting up the Jicama and strawberries, plating them and dropping them off at the table.

       "As if that would stop every vigilante from the northern hemisphere from breaking in," I snorted, bringing over the sandwiches. We ate in peace, letting the soft instrumental music from the radio fill the silence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

       I sigh happily, turning in my chair, reaching out for Damian's hand. The second I touched the cold seat next to me, my body freezes too. "Damian?"  I muttered drowsily, sitting up straight. His bag isn't under his chair. Why am I wearing a dress? Why are my leggings rolled up? I start to panic, breathing rapidly and trying to blink away the tears in my eyes. It's enough to pull me awake and I remember what happened.

       "Oh... oh" I hiccup and bite my lip, looking back out the window into the starry night. The tears start falling, but I'm being quiet so I let them. My skin itches. My neck, my wrists, under my eyes. I start scratching, trying to ignore my memories. The trip to Italy, our joint project to improve the villain resistance of the infrastructure of Gotham, the charity events we attended.

       "Ma'am?" I look up, a stewardess in the aisle leaning over. I wipe my eyes, catching the furious red color my wrists had become, before turning to her. "Uh, you missed your meal earlier and I was wondering if there was anything I could get you?" She looked uncomfortable now, glancing between my red eyes, red nose, and now red wrists and presumably red neck. I glanced over the menu she handed me, ordering a full meal. She dropped the food off and scurried away, not meeting my eyes.

        The meal was laid out beautifully; tomato soup, grilled cheese and grilled chicken with a slice of cheesecake. Yet, I couldn't seem to muster the strength to eat. It didn't really seem appetizing, and I wasn't hungry. 

        The last time you ate was over 10 HOURS ago, and that wasn't even a full meal. C'mon, one bite. I picked up the fork, but simply twirled it in my hand, watching the metal catch the light. You'll get a raging headache if you don't eat soon. Might get that deep vein thrombosis. I take a bite of the chicken, tasting nothing despite its obvious layer of seasoning. I swallowed it with half a glass of water. It felt thick, heavy, almost like swallowing a rock. But I had to eat. When I didn't immediately throw up, I set up my phone to play a cache of 65 action movies to distract myself and started eating bit by bit. I could tell I was drinking a ridiculous amount of water, but the stewardess replaced my glass without it ever going entirely empty so I didn't really notice how much I had downed. She cleared my tray when I was done, and I just kept watching movies. Whenever I thought I was going to fall asleep, I'd crank the volume up, scroll forward to fight scenes and take a drink of sprite. I was about 4 movies in when I threw off my headphones, whimpering with how severe my headache had gotten despite eating and drinking water.

       "Good morning passengers, it is 10 pm and we're about to start our final descent so if you could all please put up your trays and turn off the wifi in your electronics, we'll be landing shortly." Not gonna lie, the time zone jump threw me for a minute, I had taken a second to figure out how we made the flight in 8 hours instead of 19. I shoved everything into my bag, forcing the zipper closed. I wanted to put on some rock or pop punk songs, “Battle On!” seeming weirdly appealing, even though I hadn't heard it in a while. I felt a vein in my neck twitch, so I settled on music from the swan lake instead.

       The second we touched down I was up.  I only had my backpack so I was able to squeeze by people, ignoring protests and complaints to get off the plane. Off the plane, past the luggage claim, I was going down the escalator when I spotted them. Advika was talking to Zay, looking mad as hell, but she noticed me first. She ran over and almost tackled me to hug me, Zay taking my bag. "Princessa, baby girl, I'm so sorry." She cries into my hair, "I didn't think he was an asshole, oh god, how could he do that to you!"

       "We have the plane ready to go," Zay says, joining in on the hug. I let Advika cling to me as we make our way to the opposite side of the airport. Once we're in a more private area, Advika speaks up again.

       "I'm going to kill him. How fucking dare he!" She squeezed my hand, and now started pulling me towards the airplane.

       "Isn't that Rosella's line?" Zay prods before looking back at me. "But in all seriousness, we will absolutely end him, just say the word. Don't even say it, blink morse code, ASL, anything." I keep my mouth shut and let Advika continue to rave about the different ways she'll end Damian; financially, socially, whatever I wanted. We went out onto the runway and I couldn't help but chuckle.

       "The company jet? Isn't that a bit much?" I say as Zay escorts us in, before heading to the back.

       "The boss said it's okay. Nearly bit my head off when I called to ask but said it was ok. You did help establish our company in the foreign market," Advika takes a seat but gestures for me to lay down on the couch. "No offense mi princessa, but you look like a fucking mess. Please take a nap."

       "I don't know if I can do that," I say, letting out a long sigh. Zay comes back, handing Advika a small purse and laying a platter of cheese and crackers on the table across from us. He sets up instrumental music, from “Carmen” if I'm not mistaken, as Advika takes my hat off and starts combing my hair. I lay back into her, letting her brush out my hair, counting her impeccable pattern. 2 squirts from a spray bottle to moisten my hair, 10 brush strokes. 2 then 10 then 2 then 10. My eyes started feeling heavy so I forced myself to take a deep breath and sit up. The motion made her accidentally yank my hair and woke me a bit. As she apologized I alternated my breathing patterns to try to stay awake, noticing for the first time that we were already in the air. 

      "Please, just go to sleep," Advika begged, grabbing my hands and forcing me to look at her. I stared at her for a moment before answering.

       "I did... on the plane. I dreamed of him. The disorientation of waking up made me think I was on my way to my honeymoon," I let out a bitter laugh and she flinches, looking over to Zay, unsure what to say.

       "You look pale," Zay interjects. He comes over to me, placing a hand on my head and then my neck. He doesn't comment on the marks, but he and Advika share a look. "Change your clothes, drink some water, then these, we don't want you getting sick." He puts 2 pills in my hands before going off to find me some water.

       "Yeah, getting sick is the absolute worst thing that can happen to me right now. How silly of me," I roll my eyes and Advika snorts, trying to mask her laughter. I leave the Nyquil pills on the couch and get changed. I come back and take the pills, leaning into Advika again so she can continue to play with my hair. She spoke about anything and everything, filling the silence with her happy chatter. Undoubtedly, she was trying to distract my conscious so if I did dream again, it wouldn't be about him. It worked, her happy banter following me into my dreamless slumber.

-------------------

       I awoke to Zay gently shaking me, thankfully a lot less disoriented than last time. I gather up my things, helping myself to the bottles of water they had around. I ignore the bandages wrapped around my wrist, but the one on my throat was quickly starting to freak me out. Advika seemed to sense my discomfort, immediately coming over and cutting the bandages off.

       "Sorry, your skin seemed a bit raw so we wrapped it up," she explains calmly, alternating to rubbing her hand up and down my arm to soothe me.

       "S'ok," I mumble, taking my bag from Zay.

       "We called you a cab -it got here a couple of minutes ago-, but you're more than welcome to stay with either of us back in Mongolia. Neha and Juniper also moved here ya know, I'm sure she'd-" I cut Zay off with a shake of my head, and follow him out of the plane.

       "I just really want to be alone for a while, ya know?" As alone as I can be with my differing opinions yelling at me and my endless train of thought that does NOT SHUT UP. Zay nodded but Advika grabbed my arm before I could hail the cab closer to the plane.

       "I know you want to be alone- and you absolutely do need some time alone, this is going to be a lot to process- but...." She hesitated, biting her lip. "I know how you can get Ro. don't even try to argue with me on this. Please, take some time, but do not hesitate to call me or anyone else." Would this be a bad time to throw up? That's one way to diverge the conversation. Advika held me but I wouldn't meet her eyes. "You know what? If you don't check in with me in a week I will track you down and drag you to live with me. I'm not joking. Do you understand" I want to protest, but then I remember she didn't even have my phone number. Game on. I agree and they both give me a hug before I board the cab.

       "Good morning"

       "Good morning, where should I take you?" ah. another thing that I hadn't thought of. Without even bothering to check my bag, I knew I didn't have my keys. But I knew someone who might. I give the cab driver an address and I pull out my phone. But I can't even ask because I don't remember her number. I sigh, hoping things hadn't changed as much as I thought.

       We're in downtown Seoul before I can start properly stressing myself with the "what ifs". Had she moved? What if she didn't have the key? Would she yell at me for arriving at... Almost 3 am? I decided to do the math to distract myself, reworking the math on how a 4-hour flight turned into a 5-hour flight for a solid 10 minutes before I realized that I had not taken another time zone into play. Small miracles were on my side today. Yesterday? Tomorrow? Whatever the fuck day it is. Since it was so early, there wasn't much in the way of traffic, and the doorman was the same one that had been here when I lived her for however long it was. I explained to him that I was here to see Hong and after some reluctance, he let me in.

       Up the elevator to the fifth door, doors opening to crisp air, reminiscent of fall. Exactly 30 steps forward to a door with 4 pastel sierra sunset decorations on the door. I knock, timidly at first as to not wake the neighbors. In 5 minutes, again, a little louder. I did this for an hour before I gave up and simply stood there with my head on the door.

       "Hong. Hooooonnnngggggg" I whined quietly. Wow, thank goodness it's so early, everyone would think you're a creeper. lmaooo just imagine getting arrested your first day back. I whined into the door, contemplating just sleeping out here.

       "Rosella?" a soft voice came from behind me. I turn to see Hong with Geo's arm around her. There were 2 more people behind her but I barely had the awareness to nod as a greeting. "What are you doing here? Wasn't yesterday your-" She stops, noticing that my lip had begun to tremble. 

      "Rosella-" she comes over and wraps her arms around me, hiding my face from view of the others. Someone unlocks the door and she drags me inside. The sequins on her dress start to itch, but I continue to hug her. Once I'm ready to let go, she sits me down and goes to change her outfit while Geo sits with me. in awkward silence for a while.

       "Rose, what happened?" He eventually asks, sliding over a glass of ice water. "I thought your wedding was yesterday. Wasn't your honeymoon suppose to be in Europe?" I couldn't seem to muster the strength to answer, simply staring at him and sighing.

       "You have no tact," Hong comments, combing back in her usual floral pjs. She flops down next to me, placing her hand on mine. "You don't have to tell us now, but I would like for you to tell us eventually." I can't help but smile, she always has a soothing air to her. It's impossible to be mad or upset near her. " I have some clothes you can borrow; I have friends over today so you'll have to take the couch, but you can have the guest room tomorrow." I shake my head, forcing myself to pull away from her motherly touch.

       "I could never impose on you, I was just wondering if you have my spare key? I really want to go home." I let my voice crack at the end, hoping she wouldn't push for me to stay here. Geo looked at me like I was crazy, staring particularly long at my single backpack.

       "Okay. Geo, could you get her key? It's in the top dresser with a purple tip," Hong nods to him and he leaves. " I do feel the need to remind you that you pretty much purged the place when you left. I don't remember the last time I visited either, so its probably super dusty too."

       "I'll make do for tonight. I'll go to the store tomorrow for food and cleaning supplies, ok?"

       "You'd better, you forgetful dip stick," Geo grunts as he hands me the key. "Actually, we could probably find somewhere open rn. We could swing by and-"

       "I was actually going to walk home it's a nice night and-"

       "Absolutely not." Hong interrupted me, sounding her top tier forceful. "I know you've been through some shit in the last 48 hours but I'm not going to let you commit suicide by stupidity!" I took a minute to process this, for a second I thought I was back in Gotham.

       "It's not far... I only have my backpack and the crime rates here aren't even that high Hong. You know I took mi-"

       "Yes yes, I know about your MMA history, but I draw the line. I don't know how much the others have let you get away with but you are not walking alone at night!" I don't fight her, letting her drag me to her car, Geo driving. We're at my complex within minutes.

       "Take care of yourself Rosie." Hong says, giving me a half hug through the car window, Geo simply putting a hand on my head. "I'll come to check up on you- and if you don't answer the door I'll call the cops" she threatened before letting go.

       "Thank you, seriously, this is so great that you had my key, and for dropping me off." I hesitate before heading up. "If you don't mind me asking, how long have you two been dating?" Geo's blush was extremely visible against his skin, even in the shadows.

       "It's that obvious huh? We've been together for about 5 months," Hong replied, blushing as well.

          "I always thought you two would look cute together," I said, this time with a genuine smile. I wave them off and opt to take the stairs up. I opened the door to my apartment. 

        It's freezing, dust dancing in the waning moonlight. I set my bag down, pulling out another change of clothing from what I had bought at the airport. I threw it into the bathroom before heading over to my emergency closet. Never though the emergency stash would be used like this. Maybe we shouldn't use it? Earth shattering heartbreak is too an emergency, fuck off. I'll restock it anyways. I pull out some towels and bath supplies. I get in the shower, letting the steaming hot water run over me.

         Since when have I not been able to feel my fingers? I ask myself, flexing them one by one. It's like the stakeout in Boston that one winter, Dick brought us hot chocolate-

         No. Don't even. Dust! This place is messy and I want to properly disinfect it- unconsciously increasing the pressure with my loofah- I'll need Lysol, tide pods, scrubs, dish rags. Probably should buy more plates too. Damian always had a peculiar adoration for matching cutlery sets, when he bought me some ramen bowls-

OW OW OW OW OW OW OW! I jerk up, my hand immediately going to my upper spine. I breathe in too quickly, taking in some water. I pull open the curtain and lean over the tub, cough and sputtering, trying to catch my breath.

       "What- the- fuck-" I manage to gasp out. I was sitting down in the tub, I guess I had fallen asleep???? I shake the drowsiness off, turning off the water and getting out. Despite, or maybe because of, my broken sleep this last day I was still exhausted once I had gotten changed and my heartbeat had slowed down. I looked to my room door, but collapsed on the sofa, letting the musty leather suffocate me to sleep as my bones sunk into the couch.

Chapter 3: Safehouse

 I awoke the same way I fell asleep.

Suffocating.

        I wanted to get up, find a tissue to blow my nose, but every muscle in me ached a million ways. Did I fall off the empire state building while I was asleep? Did some cannibal beat me with a meat tenderizer for hours and just leave me on this couch? Holy FUCK.

        Even twisting my face away from the couch so I could get some fresh air strained my neck. Every joint felt dislocated, limbs lifeless like a broken marionette. The dust. Allergies. I can't breathe...

Can't breathe

Can't breathe

      Suffocating! DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE- I panic, throwing myself off the couch. Landing on the ground actually didn't cause any more pain. I laid there for a minute, mentally trying to put my joints back in their sockets. It isn't a large enough distraction, and I'm soon hyper-aware of everything. My skin was burning where the sunlight touched, the dust in the air was so heavy I could have sworn I lost my vision again. I could hear the meaningless hustle of cars and people outside on the sidewalk, but worst of all was my pounding heartbeat in my ears.

       THUMP-THUMP THUMP-THUMP THUMP-THUMP

I forced myself to get up, groaning as all my muscles pinched as they got back into place. I made a lot of unnecessary noise as I cleaned up my mess from last night. Throwing the shower caddy under the sink, flipping my backpack and letting everything fall out, slamming my dirty clothes into a pile in a corner. And I couldn't help but look around every couple of minutes, not entirely understanding where I was. Trying and failing to compensate for the noises that usually find me when I wake up. When I threw open the balcony windows, I realized I was still waiting to hear another window slide open and a soft "I'm home", even though it was well past noon.

        How wild would it be if he actually went on parole after all that? Would a fight have broken out? Would it have been like the whole Owls mishap again?

       Get your head out of your ass, they're his family; blood is thicker than water.

Blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.

He's been helping and fighting alongside them much longer than you have you dip. I storm into the kitchen, only grunting as I smash my hip against the counter. I set out 4 pages of stationary in front of me and made lists; food, clothes, furniture, extra. I took my papers and started walking around, jotting notes of what I needed. Talking to fill the void.

"More toilet paper, hand soap, towels," I hum under my breath, not really checking the cabinets. "As for clothes I should-" my voice caught when I walked into the bedroom. It was freezing. I reflexively bit my lip,  eyes watering. Instead of goosebumps, this cold sat in my stomach. The same cold in my hands, from the airplane seat, returned- lacing up my arms, down my stomach and legs. Stabbing my heart and restricting my lungs.

I'm alone.

"I should buy like 4 interchangeable outfits," the whimper barely sounded through the silent tears. I shut the door tight, almost running back to the living room. I sat just outside the ring of light, hunching over my paper. "Jeans, underwear, toothpasTE-" I sniffled but my vision only got blurrier.

"BoOKcASes, a bEd, mayBE a BeAr," my heart squeezed every time my voice broke, and in seconds I couldn't write on the soaked paper. The hiccups were my only air, snot streaking my trembling chin.

  "What did I do? What. diD. I DOOO?" I sobbed, wailing into my hands. I curled around a leg of the coffee table, letting its corners cut into my stomach. Wailing until I was dry heaving, scratching my eyes to get rid of these acidic tears, blowing my nose with my shirt- moist blotches sticking to my skin. "Day- Damian" I cried to myself until I passed out again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Afternoons spent silently reading with each other

Matching outfits for galas, some he designed himself, just for me

Our home downtown- bought to have some peace and quiet from his family. Although half the time they broke in, the other half we ended up back in the manor.

Traveling for work, for fun, for missions he didn't think were dangerous.

Sparring with Jason and Cass.

Jason showing me a hundred new bands when I got him into new music genres, trying to help each other find less aggressive ways to vent. Giving him the cream to completely erase the J from his cheek was different, the first time I saw him cry. He understood that blood family wasn't always loyal, and that I didn't mean it when I'd punch or insult someone to hide softer feelings.

Cass just vibing, understanding me and letting me get close. She was always the first to come help me when I was hurt, I became the person she could cry to. The way her face lit up when we were just able to chill a whole night, singing, watching movies and simply understanding each other on a fundamental level.

Barbra growing aggravated as she tried to teach me how to do more with technology than just googling things. Her forgiving my stupidity after I built her a new computer.

The long talks I had with Dick. Anything and everything. The first time hurt, when I called him out. He was giddy and chipper, dramatic as ever but when he caught me staring and stopped for long enough to look back, the pain in his eyes was clear as day. He had just broken up with Kory after all. He didn't need to lie, he didn't need to lighten the mood, he just needed to be honest. But once he could smile honestly again, I couldn't help but remember that he was the one who found out about me and Damian first. He'd been there to spy on our first date, hiding it from Bruce. He was the first to take me out for ice cream then subtly threaten my life if I harmed Damian, the first to swing by for spontaneous days out. To get to know me, to see if I was right for Damian.

Stephanie, Tim and I bonding over teasing and pranking Damian.

Tim and I being forced into caffeine and sleep interventions. Coffee and Coke. And then the beautiful irony of us falling asleep halfway through, especially after I taught him how to sleep with his eyes open.

Cooking with Alfred, learning his famous cookie recipes. Showing him more authentic Hispanic recipes, and him comforting me and being the first to compliment me after I was duped into cooking for the ENTIRE family.

Philosophical and political discussions with Bruce. Talks about war and power, cultural similarities and their origins. Talks about Damian as a child to mess with him. Opening up about paranoia, fear of losing loved ones, the controversies of being "too much" for some people. He understood, sometimes the ultimate sacrifices had to be made in a second. He understood because he was the same. We'd give up our lives before anyone else.

It's all gone.

So much of my past, and now, my whole future.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

it's cold. i stripped off my shirt and blew my nose.

blood. eww, it's hot. i hold my shirt to my nose, crawling under the table, balling up until i could feel all 4 legs pressing into me.

tuneless humming, watching the room light up until my eyes burn.

I have to pee.

I wash my hands, the water making me aware of my bone dry mouth. My tongue sticking to the roof of my mouth. I let the water pour through my fingers for another minute before walking away, laying back under the coffee table.

long grains. shades of brown. like dead grass. my fingers run over the million tiny bumps watching the wood fade from a blurry brown to a million tiny wooden grains.

My hair is on fire. The sun reaches it from under the table.

There are people in the hallway. They're as loud as the cars outside.

the ac is running. i start humming to drown it out.

i'm melting. i force my eyes to blink but they continue to burn. 

I can't breathe. I stagger to the bathroom and after a few minutes of moving my jaw up and down, my mouth manages to open. I swig some water before throwing some on my face. fever? headache at least. I grab a towel to wipe my face, fumbling back into the hall. fuck was i looking directly at the sun? there is only one place colder than the sun. i walk to my bedroom, the cold imperceptible to me now.

but the second i put my eyes directly onto the empty bed frame, i could almost hear them sizzle. it exhausted me. I hadn't realized how hot my face was until i laid it on the floor. like a refreshing bath, calming. i just focused on my heat being transferred to the floor, unaware that I was falling asleep again.

((The writing for the last chapter is intentionally like that, I was attempting to write Rose being in a type of  disassociated kind of state; where you aren't aware of time passing, noting seems real, even things in your immediate vicinity. Knowing that you should be doing something, drinking water, changing clothes, listening to music, ANYTHING-but still not doing it. The capitalization/simple sentences and repetition on the latter part was intentional. ))

#I dont know #i guess i wanted to see how/if my writing's changed #YES THIS IS WHERE I GOT THE THING FOR DIAVOLO'S DADS LETTER I REALLY LIKED IT SO I REUSED IT #I couldnt come up with a nice transitory chapter about Rose's friends coming to check on her/ reminding her that she's her own person/ #coming back to gotham #BUT THEY DEF DONT GET BACK TOGETHER #not obey me! #NOT OBEY ME #Not OM! #Ozera nonsense

[ottomanladies]

Have you seen Harem Suare the film by Ferzan Ozpetek? If so what did you think accuracy wise? If not I'm curious about a subject the film deals with- the closing of the harems with the end of the ottoman empire (and beginning of Kemal Attaturk). I've heard of the family itself escaping/ fleeing but what happened to the other concubines and the eunuchs?

I have not watched this movie - though now I am intrigued - but if this is a topic you're interested in I'd recommend the book Harem: the World Behind the Veil. It is not particularly accurate history-wise, and by that I mean the parts about Hürrem, Kösem or anyway anything that is not from the XIX century; but the parts about how the harem worked, the eunuchs, etc etc are very well written and I am pretty sure authentic because the author's grandmother was part of a harem.

One of the most touching and strange scenes took place at the Seraglio. Relatives of the harem women were summoned to Istanbul to claim their daughters and sisters. Circassian mountaineers and peasants came in droves, clad in the picturesque costume of country folk. They were formally ushered into a large hall of the Seraglio where the ex-sultan’s kadins, concubines, and odalisques came to greet them. The contrast between the elegantly dressed ladies of the palace and the rugged peasant men was dramatic. Everywhere people fell into the arms of their long-unseen loved ones, sobbing uncontrollably. But the most heartbreaking picture was the faces of the women for whom no one came. Kismet left them to the hollow echoes of a dead institution, which, even in their freedom, they could not escape. They remained at the Old Palace, relics of the past, trapped in their own liberation. — Alev Lytle Croutier, Harem: The World Behind the Veil

Safiye Ünüvar, who taught some of Mehmed V's grandchildren, related a visit to the sultans' consorts after Mehmed VI Vahideddin fled the country:

One day I went to this villa to pay a call on the lady Nevzad. Of course I knew I would be detained at the gate answering various questions, but I gave the necessary answers, as for me visiting Vahideddin’s Fourth Consort, the lady Nevzad, was a matter of conscience. Anyway, I was able to get in. The fact that I had come to visit during these disastrous days for her cheered the unfortunate lady quite a bit, and she listened with amazement and appreciation to my story of how I managed to get in. We visited together for a few hours before I made my way back home. Then a second visit became necessary. This was to the building at Dolmabahçe Palace that had been recently repaired and given over to palace ladies and women servants from the harems of former sultans as their place of residence. I took some oranges with me. When I arrived at the palace gate the officers asked me all sorts of questions. In fact one officer subjected me to quite an interrogation, demanding to know who I was and why I wanted to see these ladies. To him I replied simply, “I am their friend in foul weather. You can open this parcel and see what I’ve brought them as a gift. And please, here is my purse, do look through it. In fact if you wish you can keep it here and I’ll pick it up when I leave.” A fair and kindly man, the officer thought for a moment and then said, “All right, you can go in. But don’t stay more than two hours.” I was happy and thanked him. Dear Lord, how thrilled the ladies were! These were women from the imperial harems of Sultan Aziz, Sultan Hamid, Sultan Reşad, and Sultan Vahideddin. In the days of Sultan Reşad I used to go to their rooms many a night, listening for hours on end to their tales of the old traditions in the palace, some of which I wrote down. And so, however much they were glad to see me, I was just as delighted to see them. They offered up quite a few prayers on my behalf. Later on, those who had money bought a house in the city and moved out. Unfortunately I heard that the others had been sent to the Darülaceze municipal poorhouse. The opportunity never arose afterwards to go and pay them a visit. — Douglas Scott Brookes, The Concubine, the Princess, and the Teacher: Voices from the Ottoman Harem

#anon #ask post #ask: ottoman history #late ottoman empire #ottoman harem #Anonymous

[novamm66]

Red Sky in the Morning - Chapter 23 - Red Sky at Night

Hurray! A new chapter!  I am so excited to post this because it is the beginning of the end. The next chapter will be the final one and it is already written. I wrote these two together so that there won’t be a wait for the next post. Or at least not a long one. 

Thank you, amazing @lechatrouge673​, my wonderful bata, my teacher, my friend. I owe you so many drinks.

—

It was the dinner hour, so the gardens were empty. The evening sun was soft and warm as it slanted across the patches of earth and grass. Kiaya knelt in the dirt next to Ja’rell, her hands busy clearing dead and dying leaves while he harvested herbs to dry. It was peaceful, but Kiaya couldn’t ignore the passage of time. Soon she would have to go to the meeting that she had called and face both her past and her future.

Kiaya watched Ja’rell work, his hands gentle as he cut stems. She wanted to beg his forgiveness, but she had done that so many times over the last fifteen years that she had lost count. She wanted to ask for his advice, talk everything through with him. She wanted to see her friend looking back at her from his hazel eyes, but it was never going to happen.

“Imshael is here, on this side of the veil. He is working for Corypheus, and I have to face him.”

Ja’rell continued his work, and there was a long pause before he spoke. “Use caution. Your agreement with Imshael doesn’t protect you from its power on this side, but Imshael is likely still protected from you.”

“I remember.” Kiaya grabbed his closest hand. “If I don’t come back, stay close to Evie. You have to protect her for me.”

“Alright.” Ja’rell returned to his work the moment Kiaya released her hand. Kiaya watched him for a few minutes longer, before rising to her feet and heading for the War Room.

—

The heavy doors closed behind Kiaya. Her confession was over. She had told her friends everything and left them to decide what to do. Whatever they chose, Kiaya already knew her plan. She would face Imshael, stop the production of red lyrium and spit in Corypheus’s eye the next time she saw him. She was just really hoping that she wouldn’t have to do it alone.

As she climbed the stairs, Kiaya reminded herself that she wasn’t alone anymore. Cullen repeated those words to her every night before they fell asleep together. His acceptance and faith in her had given Kiaya the strength to face her friends, and Kiaya hoped it would carry her through her next confession as well.

Kiaya had asked Evelyn to meet her in Kiaya’s room, and she wasn’t surprised to see her sister sitting behind the desk as Kiaya crested the stairs. Evelyn smiled at Kiaya before going back to her writing. “Once again, Lady Buecette is requesting the Inquisitor attend her son’s name-day party.”

Kiaya snorted. “Isn’t that the third request this month? Where do these people get the idea that we do children’s parties?”

Evelyn put her quill down and rolled her eyes. “Her son is turning twenty-one.”

Kiaya laughed. “She probably thinks the boy can woo the Inquisitor and gain an alliance by marriage.”

Evelyn grinned. “Probably. If we went, we could bring Danin and Cullen, see how they squirm to work around that.”

“Yes, the presence of a husband, never mind that there are two of us, would definitely cramp their plans.”

Evelyn suddenly looked delighted, and Kiaya realized what she had implied. “Evelyn, I have to tell you something,” Kiaya said soberly before her sister could get sidetracked. She crossed over to the couch and sat down, and Evelyn followed her.

“Is something wrong between you two?” Evelyn looked worried.

“No, Cullen and I are fine. This is something from my past, and I am sorry that I kept it from you for so long, but now you need to know.” Kiaya swallowed and looked at her hands, clenched in her lap. “When we were in the Circle, the therapies that Lydia created for me did, and do, help, but they weren’t going to repair the damage that kept me from walking. After I overheard Lydia say that, I found another way. I used blood magic and made a deal with the demon Ishmael, to be able to walk again.”

Kiaya risked a quick glance at her sister’s face. Evelyn had gone very pale, her eyes wide. ”We were so careful.” Tears began to gather and fall from Kiaya’s eyes. “Ja’rell helped me research and prepare, and I made sure he was in no way connected to the act itself. I have no idea how it was twisted to blame him. If I had known…” Kiaya shook her head and wiped her eyes. “I am so sorry,” she sobbed.

Evelyn patted and rubbed Kiaya’s hair, shoulders and back until she calmed. Evelyn was crying as well, and she cupped Kiaya’s face in her hands briefly before rising, retrieving two handkerchiefs from the desk and returning to hand one to Kiaya. Evelyn wiped her own face and hugged Kiaya again. 

“First, you don’t owe me an apology. Second, you are my sister, and I love you. Third, I am not going to scold you, not now anyway.” Evelyn smiled gently. “I suspect you have been flogging yourself plenty for the last fifteen years anyway.”

Kiaya returned the smile weakly and began to clean herself up. “I have a feeling I will be receiving plenty of scolding in the next few days.”

“Why now?”

“Imshael crossed the veil. He is working for Corypheus in the Emprise du Lion,” Kiaya answered, her voice heavy.

Evelyn sat back and eyed her sister. “You’re not thinking of going after him alone, are you?”

“If I have to. I have to stop him, Evie.”

“That would be insanely stupid.” Both women jumped when Varric spoke from the top of the stairs. “Thankfully, it is unnecessary,” he continued as he crossed the room.

“Fuck, Varric. How do you do that?” Kiaya laughed shakily as her nerves made her stomach roll.

“The Kid tipped me off as to the best moment, the rest is just skill.” Varric dipped into a roguish bow. “Smudges, your presence is requested at the Herald’s Rest. Casual attire. ‘No’ is not an acceptable answer.”

“For a public tar and feathering?” Kiaya asked dryly.

“No, for cards and drinks.”

Kiaya stared at her friend in disbelief. “I confess to using blood magic, and you guys throw a party?”

Varric chuckled. “Seems as good a reaction as any. I’m not saying you won’t have some ruffled feathers to smooth over, but we are your friends, and we support you.”

“You are going to make me cry again.” Kiaya sniffed. Evelyn hugged her around the waist while Varric patted her shoulder.

“No more of that, Smudges. It’s time to drink. Cabot has a bottle of scramble just waiting for you.” Varric pulled both women to their feet. “You joining us, Roses?”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Evelyn answered, squeezing Kiaya’s hand. “I’ll just swing by the forge to grab Danin, and we are there.”

“Let's go.” Happy tears were spilling over, and Kiaya felt lighter than she had in years.

—

Kiaya hummed to herself as she strolled the walls. The day had turned out better than she expected: no one that had come to the Herald’s Rest had treated her differently. The drink flowed, laughter was constant, and the evening had ended with Cullen making a naked dash along the battlements.

Kiaya giggled as she approached Cullen’s office door. She could hear him swearing from inside as she knocked and entered. Cullen dashed for the cover of his desk.

“It’s just me.” Kiaya grinned.

Cullen groaned, and his embarrassed blush made Kiaya’s smile widen. “I did warn you that Josie was a shark.” She said.

“Yes, I know.” Cullen rolled his eyes then glared at Kiaya. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“Can you blame me?” Kiaya laughed as her eyes travelled Cullen’s bare torso, and she rose on her toes to see over the desk.

“Stop that.” Cullen tried to scowl, but his lips insisted on curving into a smile. He beckoned Kiaya to come closer. Kiaya walked around the desk, holding his trousers out to him, but the moment she was within reach, Cullen yanked her into his lap. “There, that’s better.” He said.

Kiaya settled comfortably against him. “Why did you come here? All your clothes are in our room.”

“I know,” Cullen sighed. “I panicked. Besides, there is no way I am running through the hall or the kitchens naked. I wouldn’t have made it out alive.”

“I guess it’s a good thing I convinced Josie to give me these,” Kiaya said, tossing the trousers onto Cullen’s desk before wrapping her arms around his neck. “You have to negotiate for the rest yourself.”

“And I am grateful for your efforts.” Cullen kissed Kiaya’s hair. “Are you feeling better? With how things turned out?”

Kiaya hummed happily. She closed her eyes and relaxed into the warmth of his chest. “I am. I’m still not convinced it isn’t a dream, but I keep pinching myself, and it hurts, so I’m not asleep.”

“If you keep your eyes closed, you will be,” Cullen chuckled.

Kiaya snuggled closer. “You are very comfortable.”

“Also slightly cold.”

“All evidence to the contrary.” Kiaya kissed his shoulder, Cullen always felt hot to her.

 --

Private message for Commander Cullen.

Dearest,

I know that this is unusal for me to write but I feel horrible about how we left things. I truly wish that you were here with me. I could use you support and love to face Ishmael.

That being said, I do stand by my decision, expsially now that I am here. I would not wish this place on anyone. I am sure it was beautiful once, but now it is a nightmare. There is red lyrium everywhere. It is more like that horrid future then anywhere else I have seen. I feel so guilty for not coming here sooner to stop this. But it was so hard to even get here. Digging through the snow in the pass, I swear we lost Bull in the drifts twice, and Dorian was exhausted from melting a path. Leliana is going to have her hands full getting the troops through. There is ice everywhere, the footing is too dicy for horses, it’s almost to dicy for me. (I fall down a lot. Don’t worry I am fine.)

Getting back to you is wonderful motivation. Take care of your self, and I will tell you everything when I return.

Yours always, Kiaya.

Kiaya held her shaking hands up to her mouth. The letter had taken forever to write, the inkwell kept freezing, the quill too, and she had to hold the page over a candle when she was finished so the ink would melt and dry. Now the parchment was a little brown in spots, but she hadn’t set the whole thing ablaze.

She rolled it up and sealed the letter before passing it to a scout. It was much too cold for the messenger ravens to fly directly from here, so it was necessary to carry the reports out of the mountains to warmer weather.

Kiaya sighed as she headed for the tent everyone was sleeping in, huddled together to stay warm. Tomorrow they were heading further into the quarry and the pain and death that filled the area. Everyone was miserable, and Kiaya was keeping her party small, switching out often. Still, their next foray into the quarry would be deeper this time. Cass, Dorian, and Cole were in for the haul with Kiaya. All of this before even approaching the keep.

With dark thoughts that she couldn’t calm, Kiaya headed for what rest could be had.

—

Kiaya had been wrong. The keep was, in many ways, worse than the future that Kiaya had seen. The keep was full of experiments, living things infected with red lyrium and left to rot. Or if they survived, they became crazy violent. The infected giant took down many soldiers with it.

Everything made Kiaya blood boil, which made it easier to push down her fear. She could see Imshael now, standing next to the parapet, watching the inquisition troops in the courtyard below. The demon appeared human, dressed as a mage, but Kiaya could feel the distortion to the veil around it like a sick twist in her stomach.

“Remember, fifteen paces only and a clear travel path. Otherwise, I won’t be able to pull you back,” Dorian hissed. Kiaya could feel the sticky spell on her back and chest that tethered her to the other mage. He and Sera were Kiaya’s lifeline while she baited the demon. Kiaya’s plan was risky, and none of her friends liked it, but no one had a better idea.

Cole and Varric were off to intercept any minions that might show up. Blackwall, Cass, and Bull were positioning themselves to hit the demon hard once the fight began. No eye contact with the demon was allowed until then. Kiaya was sure that the demon could cause her harm though the blood she had given in their exchange, and possible control and manipulate her magic. Kiaya would not risk being used against her friends, so Kiaya would render herself harmless.

She had already drained as much mana as possible, and she was unarmed. She had a potion hidden in her hand, ready for the last step. Kiaya started to move out into the open, slowly counting her paces. She stopped at ten.

“Kiaya! My child, I was so hoping we would run across each other.” Imshael greeted her without turning around. When he did, Kiaya felt his gaze like a blow. It closed the distance between them by half, opening its arms in greeting. “Look at you! You have grown up so much.”

Kiaya was seized by the compulsion to move forward, and it was a few steps before she locked herself down. Imshael frowned. “You have done so well.” The demon’s voice was warm, fatherly, and it made Kiaya’s skin crawl, but it drew her forward as Imshael glided up to her. “I took this job in the hope that we would meet again. I am so proud of you.”

Kiaya felt his words like a slap, and she found her voice, hatred dripping from every word. “You can take your pride and shove it. I am not proud of what I did, and it has tainted everything that has followed. You will not take credit for any good that has come from my mistake.”

Imshael sneered at her now. “You think what you did was a mistake?” It laughed, “It got you here, leader of thousands. Money and power the likes of which most can’t even dream, but you are not satisfied.” Condescension dripped from every word. It was trying to provoke Kiaya, fuelling her anger through their connection so Kiaya would strike them.

Kiaya took a slow breath tamping down her fury. She did not bother to hide her disgust, and Imshael growled when she resisted its power and stepped back. “I was young and stupid, caught up in my own head, and I believed you then. But not anymore. You wish to break our pact then do it, suffer the consequences, but I will not do it for you, you maggoty piece of druffalo dung.”

Imshael was furious, its eyes were bulging and the human illusion was starting to crack. “Why did you come then? To make another deal for your little Inquisition?” It spat. “I would be willing, you know, for old time’s sake.”

“I will never deal with you again, and I would be here to stop this atrocity if you are here or not. Getting to send you back to the cesspool you crawled out of is just a lovely bonus.” Kiaya eased the cork out of the vile in her hand. Imshael was too distracted to notice. “You arrogant piece of shit. I know that I can’t hurt you, but I can make damn sure they can.” She quickly swallowed the mage bane potion, striping her remaining mana and closing her connection to the fade and Imshael all at once.

“No!”  The demon screamed, exploding outward as its anger forced it to take its true form. Kiaya couldn’t move as it reached for her with clawed hands.

—

Like and reblogs are always appreciated. Asks are very welcome too. 

To read from the beginning the Master List is Here or if you prefer it is here on AO3

#Red Sky in the Morning #Kiaya Trevelyan #Kiaya&Cullen #dragon age fanfic

[erbferbatinlerb]

Happy Birthday, Ferb!

it is a very good boy's birthday today and it's also the leap day so i thought he deserved something special being as it only gets to happen every 4 years, so here's a quick lil thing i wrote!

▪▪▪

Phineas waited until he was sure Ferb was asleep to get out of bed. Ferb was normally perfectly quiet when he's awake, so he could feign sleep exceptionally well... to anyone except Phineas. Phineas knew the difference between the Ferb silence and the Ferb sleep silence. It couldn't be more clear. It was night and day, honestly.

Phineas held his breath for a few seconds to confirm what he was hearing. Yup, he was asleep.

He crawled out of bed, careful as possible, to minimize noise and to ensure he didn't disturb Perry, who was asleep at the end of his bed, snoring gently. Phineas paused to take a look at him. He smiled.

He braced his body against the door to combat its natural creak, before slipping through, out into the hallway. He tiptoed past Mom and Dad's room and slinked towards Candace's pink door.

He peered into the room to see his sister fitfully stirring in her sleep.

"But, your honour..." she mumbled.

"Oh, Candace must be having that bank robbery dream again. I'll wait. I really do want to know if she's guilty or not." 

Phineas clicked the door closed gently behind him and quietly found a seat at Candace's vanity.

Candace stirred, murmured some less comprehensible words. Phineas tapped his fingers on the table as he waited.

"...but how could the talking zebra have been my accomplice if we only met when-" Candace sat up, coming back into consciousness. She looked right at him, but it took a few seconds before she processed it. "Phineas?" she asked groggily.

"Hi Candace! I'm sorry, did I interrupt your dream? I was really hoping we'd get to find out what happens after the talking zebra this time."

"What are you doing in my room?"

"I need your help planning Ferb's surprise party."

"Phineas, it is..." Candace glanced over at the clock. "Four in the morning."

"Well, Ferb and I's identical circadian rhythms wake us up at precisely 6:59, so we don't have a lot of time."

"Okay, I'm going to ignore how insanely weird that thing you just said was and let you get to the point."

"Ferb's birthday is this weekend — as you know. And it's REALLY his birthday this year, unlike three quarters of the years, where we have to either celebrate it a day before or after, depending on which one falls more weekend-adjacent. I wanna plan something extra special for him, but I'm gonna need your help."

"Okay, I'm in, what do you need me to do?"

...

Phineas was up at the crack of dawn on Ferb's birthday, and this time, Candace was waiting down the hall for him already, having set her own alarm to wake up on time to prepare. She nodded at him, and they made their way down the stairs as quickly and quietly as possible. 

They slipped on their shoes and jackets and slid back the glass door to the backyard. There was still a thin veil of snow covering the lawn, and Phineas could hear Candace shivering already as she closed the door behind them. 

Phineas relished in the crunch of the snow beneath his sneakers. He was more of a summer guy, of course, but he loved to make the most of the snow for the few short months it lasted.

"So," Candace demanded, hugging her arms around herself. "When are your little friends supposed to be getting here to-"

As if on cue, the back gate opened up to reveal Isabella, with the Fireside Girls in tow. Phineas rushed over to greet them.

"Hey Phineas. How ya doin'?"

"Isabella! Ladies. Thank you all so much for coming."

"You got it, Phineas. Let's get to work, girls!"

The party set-up went pretty smoothly. It was cold enough to motivate everyone to keep moving, and with Candace and all of the Fireside Girls helping, they made quick work of setting up all the party decorations, balloons, streamers, the works. Phineas knew it was unconventional to have a birthday party first thing in the morning, but Ferb loved it when he thought outside the box. And besides, the real party didn't start until tonight anyway; this was just an intimate get-together.

Baljeet and Buford arrived shortly after the girls, and with all of their help everything was set up in no time. With that, everyone got to waiting, while Candace went inside to get breakfast ready — Phineas had insisted that you can't eat cake until after a balanced breakfast.

Phineas on the other hand, went to put the finishing touches on his invention. 

…

Phineas slipped back into the house at about 6:45, having finished with just a few minutes to spare. He wiped the motor oil from his hands on a terry cloth as he came into the kitchen.

"I'll never know how you can build that stuff so fast," said Candace, deadpan. She was just putting the first plate of pancakes onto the table.

Phineas shrugged. He inhaled deeply, taking in the smell of Candace's homemade breakfast.

"Nice work, sis!"

Phineas washed his hands in the sink and helped Candace plate the bacon and eggs.

They took a step back to admire her work, high-fiving.

"Ferb will be down any minute, I'm sure." Phineas took a seat at the kitchen table. "I'll text Isabella to make sure all the party guests are in place."

…

A nonchalant birthday breakfast with Ferb was a success, but Phineas was practically vibrating in his seat the entire time, excited for him to see what he had built. Ferb thanked Candace for the meal, and stood up, and Phineas followed suit. He had planned for a more subtle approach, but his excitement got the better of him and he ended up pulling his brother by the arm to the backyard.

"Happy birthday, Ferb!!!" came a chorus of voices 

Ferb looked surprised for a second, then his expression shifted into a smile. He turned to Phineas, gratitude written on his face.

He looked out at the party. A union jack cake, yellow balloons, giant ice sculptures… Phineas had thought of everything.

Along with the girls, Baljeet, and Buford, were a few other guests. Standing next to the cake table were Irving, Stacy, Jeremy, and… Vanessa Doofenshmirtz. Ferb punched Phineas in the arm. Phineas laughed. "You haven't even seen the best part yet, c'mon!"

He led Ferb to the garage, where his real present lie.

"Presenting... the all-new... Phineas-and-Ferb Super Spectacular, Awe-inspiring, Awesome-tacular Automobile! Or, the Phineas-and-Ferb-mobile, for short."

Silence.

"What, is it the awesome-tacular? I know, I know, I use that word a lot, we can change it, if you-"

"Is this a solar-powered, remote-controlled hybrid car?"

"And it flies! Watch this."

Phineas pressed a button and a set of wings folded out.

"And it has extra cup holders, a surround sound stereo system with bluetooth hookup, a sunglass compartment, en-flight refreshments, and a holographic video screen in the backseat."

"Does it have a hot tub?"

"Does it--" Phineas stopped. "It-it doesn't, actually. I- wow. I didn't really expect you to ask that. I guess I... You know, I had considered the possibility, but I just didn't think-- Normally, I'm the one who-- Oh, you're just teasing me! I get it."

Ferb nodded.

"You're just teasing me, because... I already thought of everything?"

"Yes. Yes, I am. It's perfect."

Phineas pulled his brother into a hug. He held out the remote to him. "Wanna do the honours, bro?"

Ferb eagerly accepted the remote.

…

After an amazing fly around Danville in Phineas's spectacular new car, Phineas and Ferb returned to the party. The guests all cheered as they landed the vehicle.

The cake was cut, and Phineas went over to thank Isabella for her hard work, leaving Ferb by the refreshment table with Baljeet.

"There is no way you did not know about all of this," Baljeet commented. "We were using power tools in your backyard in the earliest hours of the morning. I am very surprised that your parents are not awake yet, actually."

"Of course I knew about this," Ferb confessed. "I've known he's been planning something for weeks. But Phineas loves to surprise people. It makes him happy. So of course I'll go along with it. Besides, this is a pretty cool party. Thank you guys."

Baljeet stared at him for a moment. "That is the most lines I have ever heard you say all at once. I feel quite privileged, yet at the same time, very weirded out." Ferb opened his mouth to respond to this, but Baljeet silenced him. "You are welcome. I am going to go see what Buford is doing now. Happy birthday."

Ferb watched Baljeet walk away.

He shrugged. "His loss, I suppose."

#pnf #phineas and ferb #ferb fletcher #phineas flynn #candace flynn #baljeet tjinder #isabella garcia shapiro #i have never written pnf fic before and i honestly didnt expect the day to ever come when i would #but here we are #this ended up being longer than i expected but its also still short compared to things i usually write #sorry for no readmore yall im on mobile #i got to include some of my fave fun facts in this shoutout to forgottenpnffacts #i had no plan for this except 'phineas makes a surprise party for ferb' and i let it write itself mostly in one day so #hope u enjoy :') #do not tag as ship #this is set like. shortly after the canon summer ig #theres a nod to ferbnessa in this bc ferb canonically has a crush on her but its not needing to be shippy #i love my kids getting along together so im very glad to provide that good candace and phineas working together content to yall #oh i forgot to tag this as #dannywrites

[lark-in-ink]

Hey uh

I wrote a thing!

Good Omens/Harlots crossover.  In which Charlotte Wells becomes a pawn in one of Crowley’s schemes.  Theoretically this is part 2 of a 5+1 (five times the North/Wells family met Aziraphale or Crowley) but unfortunately I have exactly 0 words written of part one (vs parts 3, 4, and 5 which are all partially written.) so who knows if I’ll actually keep it as a 5+1. 

(rated uh, T I guess? warning for nonexplicit underage-probably-depending-on-timeline sex work as typical in Harlots.) 

To Miss Charlotte Wells. Please join me tonight at the Vauxhall Gardens. Meet at ten oclock by the east fountain.

The card was heavy, of good paper, but plain and unengraved. There was no signature. Enclosed was a ticket to the masquerade ball to be held that evening. The ticket, the card, and the gown had been delivered to the house in Covent Garden by the dressmaker's son, who had unburdened himself and disappeared before Charlotte could think to question him.

The gown was beautiful, shot silk and heavily embroidered with flowers and butterflies. There was a mask, too, in the shape of a butterfly's wings.  “Whoever could have sent it, Ma?” Charlotte asked.

Ma smiled. “An admirer, for sure. And a rich one at that. Perhaps your charms have not gone as unappreciated as you feared”

Charlotte grinned- after a glorious few months of charming men of higher wealth and standing than she or her ma had seriously dreamed of, the past few weeks had been a comparative disappointment, working out of Ma’s house in Covent Garden, fucking a string of shopkeepers  and tradesmen and clerks and all the other men of modest means who scurried around London doing the bidding of the men Charlotte was really after. She was in no danger of starving, but she knew she could do better. She had done better.

And with this ticket, she would do better once again.

The dress fit perfectly, without the need for a single adjustment- to little Lucy’s disappointment, who had run at once for her sewing kit when she'd seen the gown arrive and begged to be allowed to make the necessary alterations. Instead, Charlotte allowed her sister to style her hair into one of the more elaborate arrangements she had seen on the finer ladies of London.

When ten oclock came around and Charlotte stood in the appointed place, it was not a gentleman who approached her.  One moment she was alone, and the next a lady stood next to her. “Miss Charlotte Wells.” she murmured. “How pleased I am to see you have come.”

You’ll be even more pleased to see me come, Charlotte bit back- she might have said it if it were a gentleman, but she was rather unsure now.  It was not out of the question that she might have attracted the attentions of some aristocratic lady. It had happened before. But it was not the most likely scenario. She glanced over to see the woman who had arranged for Charlotte’s presence.

She was tall, angular and bony, and she stood with a sort of predatory grace that made Charlotte’s heart race- perhaps in fear, perhaps in increased hope that the lady was looking for an assignation of her own. Her gown spilled dark green over the black of her stomacher and petticoat, the subtle embroidered design of snakes barely visible in the flickering lanternlight.  A ruby in the shape of an apple glistened at her throat, resting enticingly between her clavicles. Her hair was a rich red, styled even more elaborately than Lucy had done Charlotte's. Her mask was of the heavier porcelain style that hid the whole upper of her face, in an etched pattern of scales. The mask’s eyes covered in a dark glass rather than open, so that no hint of her own eyes could be seen. True anonymity, rather than the pretense of it. A wise choice, if a lady wished to consort with a harlot behind her husband’s back.

“And who might you me, madam? The serpent of Eden?” Charlotte asked. She tossed her head coquettishly. “Have you come to tempt me then?”

The lady smirked. “Not my intention, though I suspect I’ve done so just the same. But no, I’m afraid. Your role tonight is not Eve, but the apple. Come walk with me.”

They linked arms- Charlotte shivered at the contact- and strolled slowly around the winding paths of the gardens towards the center of the merriment. “Do you see that gentleman there? In that terrible stag costume?"

Charlotte looked. The gentleman in question's coat was not so terrible. His hat, on the other hand, would have been questionable at the best of times. As it was, the poorly-stuffed stag’s head was being pulled askew by the weight of it’s antlers. The effect was unfortunate.

“That’s Lord Exton, a member of the house of Lords,” the woman said. “Tonight at midnight, several members of Parliament will be meeting in secret to discuss certain bills and issues. My purpose tonight to to see that Lord Exton does not attend this meeting. I would like you to see that he is... otherwise occupied for the duration.”

"And how should I do that?" Charlotte said, as obvious as the answer was.

The woman smiled in that predatory way again. "I'll leave that to your discretion." She guided them towards a less well-lit path, As they entered the shadows where the lights were too sparsely spaced, she reached into her pocket slit, and pulled out two pouches that jingled promisingly. "Five guinnies now. Five more once the deed is done. Meet me tomorrow afternoon at St James Park. Tell nobody."

Charlotte held out her hand and the woman dropped one of the pouches into it. "I'm still charging him, as well," Charlotte said.

The woman grinned.  "I would hardly expect otherwise, Miss Wells. Best of luck."  She disappeared into the crowd without another word.

It was easy- not that Charlotte had been worried. She’d been charming culls for five years. Still, it was one thing to know that she could easily go into a place like this and get the company and coin of one of the many wealthy men here- another thing to have so specific a quarry. But in the end he was easy, a middle-aged man of very little wit or character and all the usual appetites. Charlotte wondered a little, as she smiled and charmed him, if she might charm him into being her keeper.

But then, maybe a man who someone wished to keep out of politics was not someone Charlotte wished to be so dependent on, even temporarily. She would not reject him if he came to seek her out. But she also would not chase after him, not when there were so many better prospects in London.  

When Charlotte ventured to St. James Park the next afternoon at the appointed place.  The woman was feeding the ducks.  Her dress was modest, high-necked and long sleeved. All in black, though too ornate and rich to be that of a Puritan. A black silk veil fell from the front of her hat obscuring her face. Charlotte wondered if she was recently widowed. A widow in mourning would, of course, be expected to abstain from entertainments like masquerade balls- but then, perhaps that explained her choice of mask.

"Most respectable ladies would prefer not to be seen talking to a harlot," Charlotte said as she approached from behind.

The woman betrayed no surprise. "While their husbands carry on as they please? That seems awfully unfair. Anyway, I hope nobody could accuse me of being respectable."

Charlotte smiled a little at this. “Oh? Do you often carry on with harlots, then? I do love being embroiled in a good scandal.”

“You’re a persistent little minx,” the woman chided. “I suppose you got the job done, then?”

Charlotte sighed. “Yes, yes. Your troublesome lord spent the night embraced by my thighs and I assure you politics was the furthest thing from his mind. What little he has of one, at least. Am I allowed to know what grand scheme of yours I’ve helped to orchestrate?”

“Oh, not my own scheme, just a favor for a friend,” the woman said. “And no. Not unless you manage to glean the truth from the web of lies that is London gossip. I wouldn’t try too hard.”

“And my payment?”

The woman once again produced the jingling pouch from her skirts. “Five guineas, as promised. And a bonus.”

The purse contained five guineas. Charlotte counted them raised her eyebrow “A bonus?”

“From my friend.  It will be- a surprise.” The woman smirked and walked away.  Charlotte secreted the coins in her own pocket and watched her go with a lingering disappointment.

Over the next few weeks Charlotte read portions of the newspaper that she would never have ordinarily studied so intently, wondering what it was her actions had caused or prevented. But how could she tell? The only clue she had was the importance of the absence of one man, not his involvement. Besides, over the next few weeks, she found herself easily distracted. Her luck had continued it’s upward turn. Some of this could have been the influence of the “friend” the lady had mentioned. But least half of her luck was just that- luck. A chance meeting nobody could have predicted.  And an absurdly long string of wins at the gambling table.  

She never saw the strange lady again.

#good omens #my fanfiction