#and theres so many ways the show couldve explored it more

[blaintism]

blaine in blame it on the alchol has always been so interesting to me, and i wish that the episode was told more from his perspective. what always stands out are the things he says to kurt - it’s more confusing for him, and he’s trying to figure out who he is.

i wonder a lot about his journey with being gay to this point. perhaps he’s always had these questions, and came out before truly being sure of who he is, and if there’s one thing about blaine, he can fake confidence. it might be a degree of projecting, but i get this idea that, despite being “out and proud,” blaine still has a lot of insecurity about his sexuality, and, maybe just a little bit, is seeing if his attraction to rachel is real because of this insecurity. this seems very possible when, in the very next episode, blaine drops the absolute bomb that keeps me up at night that, at the very least in his mind, his father has tried to “make him straight,” and when later we learn about the sadie hawkins incident.

this is a kid who has been attacked for who he is, who believes his father doesn’t accept him, of course kissing a girl under the influence could give him these thoughts that maybe that is a possibility for him. his relationship with his dad could be better, it might make the world safer for him. but in the end he has to accept that that isn’t who he is. to me, that’s a much more compelling story than kurt’s side of things, and i think a really relatable plotline for someone like me who identified other ways for a long time because the idea of being gay was difficult.

and an aside: this could all work so well into klaine getting together in t-minus two episodes. what if blaine demonstrably sees how his feelings for rachel are not the same things he feels for kurt? what if the security this episodes conclusion gives him of knowing who he is makes him more ready to be with kurt? much to think about.

#blaine anderson #glee #text #gleewatching #since this all came off a rewatch #blaine meta #this plotline drives my brain crazyyyy #im a lesbian who identified as bi for about five years because i was in deep deep denial #so i see blaine maybe be in a bit of denial for like... 2 days #and am like omg... he just like me fr #obviously some people just geniuinely like. question and explore and thats a valid interpretation #but to me i can see how hes confusing and its really a lot for him #and blaines nothing if not deeply insecure #and theres so many ways the show couldve explored it more #a different post that could be made here about how hes the inverese of kurt whos known hes gay forever #while blaine might have realized not long before we meet him and just sort of immediately declared it to the world #and faced the confusion of that period of time while also dealing with the reactions #thats a headcanon though we know nothing about his coming out. sigh

[moonsidesong]

ok ive finished puyo chronicle. dont play puyo chronicle. if you want to see puyo chronicle just watch the precise museum video uploads of it and ignore the fact they dont have eyebrows because its in citra. im gonna talk about puyo chronicle now.

absolutely miserable slog of a video game. every single open area is nearly completely empty and full of dead ends. every chest is full of lame rewards that i almost never got use out of and i eventually just stopped opening them so i wouldnt have to fight mimics anymore. you dont want to explore anything because there's hardly any reward for it and your movement speed is so slow there's even less of an incentive to go out of your way to trek to a random corner of the map for 200 coins that you wont use.

the final gauntlet, which is a 15-story tower, comprises of like, three stories where something happens and the rest are completely empty and only occupied by common enemies, which by then you will be tired of fighting and actively be avoiding encountering. the devs made a bunch of maps and said thats enough game design for today<3

and then, at the end of it, you fight a final boss that had literally nothing to do with anything else up until that point. rafisol really had the potential to be an extremely cool antagonist if she had been involved in the plot from the getgo but instead she shows up having not at all been foreshadowed prior, you do the same lame fighting style youve been doing for almost every encounter up until that point, and the only saving grace of it is a really cool battle theme. its pretty bad presentation to just watch this supposedly UBER powerful absorption themed final boss just float there menacingly and occasionally throw a line of nuisance puyo at you. rafisol has a lot of cool animations, i dont know why you'd rob her of the chance to show them off in a dramatic way!!!! aaah!!!! its all really disappointing because she's the only female final boss character besides doppelganger arle and shes stuck attached to this soggy sad nothing burger of a video game. i want my evil women INVOLVED sega

puyo characters have never been the most complicated to figure out but they are NOTICEABLY flatter and more annoying. you can see it the most on sig and ragnus who refuse to talk about literally anything other than "bug!" or "im the hero from videogame world!" respectively. the plot spends all its time being completely aimless other than the vague idea of "if we find these stone pedestals, something will happen questionmark???" up until ally randomly starts getting sick when rafisol starts ready to hatch from her evil egg or whatever. the plot's idea is that satan modified this story because he wanted to go on an adventure with arle. and well chroni writers i have to say you guys arent really doing a good job of conveying that when the only places you see satan are at the very beginning and very end of the game.

hey speaking of characters hanging out with arle. theres. too many. of them. i think they were just trying to make the whole skill battle team thing make sense in universe but i think itd be a lot easier to just focus on like. the A trio and Ally and you only hang out with the other characters in the areas they're actually relevant. and they just go "well arle ill be there to help you if you need me!" but they dont physically come with you and then we just pretend that makes sense.

anyway despite it all i still like ally and i still like rafisol despite both of them having terrible haircuts god bless but i wish they were in a video game that didnt suck absolute egg!!!!!!! like i said earlier rafisol couldve been extremely cool if she was involved early on and wasnt just some unrelated problem girl. ive been playing around with a few re-write(ish??) ideas that ive been sharing with my friends to keep my sanity while trudging through this videogame and i might share some of those some other time.

until then please look at this picture again. my favorite part about this game is when accord holds popoi like this. every time popoi was on screen i briefly forgot how much not fun i was having

#bri talks #i just needed to rant i gotta. go to bed in like. thirty minutes. sorry if this is organized and worded confusingly LOLOL #play literally any other puyo game #like a lot of them also have pacing issues but at least theyre also fun #... lol except yon. dont play yon either #just... idk... just go play puyo tetris 2 or something...

[claythefriendlyghost]

We NEED to talk about why this recent episode cemented Stolitz for so many people

While this episode did not have many moments where Blitzø and Stolas were being explicitly romantic towards eachother, the singular reason this episode supports the possibility of Blitzø and Stolas becoming a thing is because...

Blitzø's attitude toward Stolas in this episode is... different...

So many people (myself included) were a tad bit put off from shipping stolitz because there wasn’t really any proof that the relationship was anything more than a mere transaction. The owl wanted to satify his perverted and fetishistic needs, and the imp hesitantly agreed, only because he would receive the book in return. while the former is currently still true, this episode shows that the latter may not be the case.

The bedroom scene

This scene displays the relationship between blitzø and stolas as the tamest its ever been. blitzø doesnt really direct much disgust towards Stolas himself and even says that this monthly meetup isnt something he 'fusses' about. this attitude Blitzø holds when he and stolas are alone contrasts what we've seen in previous episodes where the idea of spending time with stolas seemed to greatly irritate him.

They also seem strangely close in this scene, Blitzø being comfortable with Stolas's advances and them even sharing a cigarette.

Additionally, one of the pieces of evidence that i often see overlooked is that Blitzø did not have to agree to go to the harvest festival with Stolas in the first place. He knew what he'd be getting himself into, with his knowledge of the obvious and embarrasing flirting he dealt with at Loo Loo Land. despite this, not only does he agree to go, he says it sounds like it'll be "a blast and a half". And this time, there isnt even a promise of him being paid!! hes going purely because he wants to

Furthermore, his expression is very different from that which was shown in the original storyboards, showing that there was a reason the crew changed his attitude from "whatever i guess it could be fun 😒" to "sure it sounds like it could be alot of fun 😏"

2. The famed Millie/Striker scenes

These scenes on their own can be interpreted many ways, however, with the context of the opening scene, its quite obvious why Blitzø reacted the way he did in reaction to millie and striker here

Firstly his reaction to Millie calling stolas his boyfriend isn't what it'd be if there was nothing going on between Blitzø and Stolas. If Blitzø were confident in the fact that he had no feelings for Stolas, knowing him, he likely would've made a quip that prevented him from seeming at all insecure or embarrased. he likes to take control of conversations and not leave any room for his weaknesses to be revealed.

This is not what happens. he responds by simply saying he is not above hitting Millie in front of her father. he doesnt deny it. He doesnt make a fun jab at millie herself. he simply allows his embarrassment to be the butt of the joke. THAT DOESNT HAPPEN...like... ever.

Now for the striker scene. I'll l keep it short since many have talked about this before, but the very fact that Blitzø is caught stumbling over his words in an attempt to describe his relationship with stolas is VERY telling. Even in the case where Blitzø did have some feelings towards stolas, I wouldnt put it above him to simply lie and state that there is nothing between them. that wouldve been incredibly easy, and yet... he stumbles.

Even so, he didnt even need to clarify. Striker used the word 'conned' implying he already had the impression that the sex was merely transactional. Blitzø literally couldve ended it at "the short answer is yes" and let striker respond. the fact that Blitzø felt like it was some sort of elephant in the room that needed to be addressed shows how his realtionship with Stolas is on insecure ground and is something he is self conscious about.

Some people have said that this scene is him trying to seem cool in front of striker, but again...he couldve just lied. Lying in order to appear cooler in front of someone he admires wouldve been extremely in character for him, and yet he didnt. its obvious he's experiencing some complicated emotions towards stolas, complicated enough that he couldnt even state the simple lie of 'there is nothing between us'.

3. Blitzø saving Stolas from Striker

Here Blitzø claims that stolas is his easiest ticket to earth, but thats not entirely true. the Grimoire is his easiest ticket to earth. stolas does not need to be alive in order for Blitzø to steal the grimoire and all its power. in fact, that'd be alot easier for the gang as they could keep the book safe in one location as opposed to bringing it back and forth between stolas's place and IMP headquarters and additionally having to go through the trouble of sleeping with him.

Here, Blitzø has the opportunity of taking stolas out of the equation, which would undeniably make things easier for him, and yet, he doesnt take it. theres obviously much more to why he saved Stolas here, and could possibly imply that Blitzø does care about him.

Anyway, those are all the details I caught from this episode. I really do hope Blitzø's feelings in regards to stolas are explored in the following episodes, cause boy am I invested

#helluva boss #helluva boss episode 5 #helluva boss blitzo #stolitz #stolas #blitzo #helluva boss stolas #harvest moon festival #helluva boss theory #blitz #vivziepop #helluva spoilers #striker #millie

[ask-koichi]

hey there--decided to write another rant here bc my page is a little too shit-posty for stuff like this <3 hope this is okay!!

I hate Jotaro’s characterization. a lot.

He, as a character had potential beyond just being who he is: a badass. When I ask people what they think of jotaro, they tell me they think of a giant strong guy who doesnt take shit.

And that... Sucks.

With many shounen or even seinen manga, theres a weird caricaturing for badass characters like jotaro, and perhaps its because of the stigma behind ‘strong & manly’ men with emotions, but jotaro could have been a legendary and relatable character if only araki delved into his insecurities.

in the beginning as startdust crusaders we’re shown how jotaro is rude to his mother but when she doesnt kiss him one time he gets slightly worried--something that is the only profound scene regarding in their relationship.

(also i dont like at all the fact that holly put up w her son's shit. she is a person too, and it wouldve been nice if she physically stopped herself from touching/kissing him bc he's so explosive)

the reason he’s a bitch to his mother is not explored beyond puberty hitting him like a truck.

Like... thats it??

i know what ur probably thinking: huh?? and?? the focus of this part was just with the crew aiming to fight dio--

and thats when i say ur WRONG.

the entire beginning, the very base of this was because jotaro didnt want his mother to die, so i feel like it does matter to talk abt how poorly it was portrayed.

in 1988 of japan, lets say that there was a stigma for many things, and even taboos that still apply to this day in many countries, but the two main ones are: being fatherless, large, and having foreign blood/parent(s)

jotaro has blue eyes, jotaro was ‘fatherless’ at a young age, since his father is rarely ever around.

japan is known for its extreme bullying towards the nonconforming in both physical and mental aspects, search it up.

anyway, i feel like it would have been the best explanation for jotaro’s cold nature that developed at such a young age and how it effected the people around him because of the bullying he faced for having blue eyes or having an english woman as a mother, and so on.

it would have also explained why later on as he slightly matured he’d blame his mother and therefore be mean to her and call her rude shit--because he associated his mother to the bullies who mocked him for having a white mom--and also hate his father by extension bc he was labelled as ‘fatherless’.

he’d think that everyone is superficial and that intimidation is the best way to protect himself bc when he bulked up the boys stopped pestering him and the same girls who laughed at the sight of him being bullied now wanted to slip into his pants.

those insecurities would ten-fold maybe--was it just bc of his looks that ppl now like him? now that he’s grown, is he nothing beyond his looks?? does he, as a person, mean nothing to anyone?

is this why his mother is more withdrawn now--bc she realized this (’withdrawn’ being shes giving jotaro more space since hes always so grumpy, but he doesnt know this).

perhaps he couldve bonded with kakyoin beyond just sharing life and death experiences bc of similar school experiences--after all, its canon that kakyoin is suicidal, and maybe depression couldve been another topic explored--kakyoin is weirdly fierce for someone who is supposed to be a ‘weak/kindred soul’ as araki put it.

kakyoin has flaming red/pink hair--a major anomaly. he’s softspoken--yet another anomaly, since boys back then were supposed to be assertive.

it wouldve been cool to see them bond mutually from that--with kakyoin showing genuine interest in his input when he shows him his art, asks him for his opinion, and slowly as the 50 days progressed, he trusts kakyoin more than anything bc in anyones experience who’s faced similar experiences, once u open up enough to trust someone, u trust them completely.

same thing goes for the rest of the crew; theyre all strange, eccentric people and it would make sense that jotaro would embrace himself and those features he’s hated for all his life (the reason why he always wears his hat couldve been that it shadows over his eyes is to hide the ocean-blue hue of them)

back to his mom--yeah, he blames her, and the moment she gets sick, it worries him--a lot.

theres been moments in his life where he wishes she were dead, but when he saw her wilting on the ground, he fucking loses it.

reality crashes down him--it wouldve been profound if he only lost his shit in the beginning with only his mother and stayed calm and cool later on in the story. maybe after kakyoin is killed, he couldve really lost his shit if his relationship developed a ton--maybe he even admitted to him in one scene that he’d love to go to his favorite coffee shop with kakyoin and show him the places he loiters around (places that seem so bright now that the thought of kakyoin, his first real friend, would check out) bc after all, even if joot is built like an ox, he’s still a kid.

so, it wouldve been cool that the moment he finds out that kakyoin was killed, he fucking loses it--and this time, now that his stand in his complete control and he’s matured and learned from all his fights, he’s absolutely terrifying in his own way.

he doesnt lash out and freak out the way he did with his mother, but this time, the way he reacts here in his confrontation w dio was the same, if not worse way in part 4 when he destroys kira while he faced a ptsd episode (kudos to araki for throwing that scene in btw)

he doesnt respond to any of dio’s taunts and hits him with dirty moves--AND OMG... I FORGOT IF THIS HAPPENED CANONICALLY SO FORGIVE ME IF IT DID BUT IMAGINE IF HE FINISHES OFF DIO THE SAME WAY DIO KILLED KAKYOIN--WITH A GIANT HOLE IN HIS STOMACH???

AND HE JUST STANDS THERE, HOVERING OVER DIO, WITH THAT DEAD + ANGRY LOOK IN HIS EYES, and lets pretend that joseph is okay here, he needs to pull jotaro physically away from dio’s body bc jotaro just continues to beat his body to a bloody pulp and starts sobbing.

jotaro is a human, 17 year old boy who had no friends up until now. jotaro yearns normalcy--something that had seemed so out of reach till he became fast friends w kakyoin--kakyoin, who was the same person who complimented his eyes when his hat was off, the same person who had his back in fights and was so damn kind, and all of that was ripped away so suddenly.

part 3 ends with jotaro being weirdly kind to his mother--she reminded him a little of kakyoin, and tries his best to keep his emotions in check and not lash out on her.

the last panel is  of jotaro, a large, strong guy hunched over his desk with his phone loose in his hand, and a message was sent to kakyoin where it says:

"where are you? didnt you want to taste that cherry cheesecake i told you about?"

LIKE IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR?? NOT A GLORIFIED 17 Y/O WHO CALLS HIS MOM A BITCH AND IS SUPER STRONG PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY??? LIKE???

JOTARO IS THE DEFINITION IS PHYSICALLY STRONG BUT MENTALLY STRUGGLING... he suffers to make any real connection throughout the entire series except for koichi bc i think he reminds him of kakyoin and then his daughter (to the people who’ve read part six: you know.)

HE WOULDVE BEEN SUCH A WELL WRITTEN CHARACTER--I BARELY TOUCHED THE ICEBERG BC THERE WAS SO MANY ROUTES ARAKI COULDA TAKEN WITH HIM BUT THIS IS WHAT WE GOT........

(omg sorry this is so long, i just feel like araki really fucked up w his earlier characters!!! i hope my ramble makes sense ;-;)

OOC; God fuck, I can't even type out a response to this. I tried for weeks, but I wasn't able to. But I agree so fucking hard. I love you man- like, I never met people who actually thought this way, all the jobros... ya know?

#jotaro kujo #jjba #jojos bizarre adventure #kakyoin noriaki #stardust crusaders #dio brando #DIO

[ratspberry]

many naruto thoughts head overloading

ok im only like 20 episodes into shippuden and i skipped a Lot of filler in original naruto bc i do not have the patience </3 (i will come back to the filler one day though) and while i love this anime theres so much i wish... was not written how it is

first of all sakura... i love her sm and i just wish her character was given some more care like at this point in shippuden im actually really enjoying the direction shes taken but i heard a lot of her growth is sidelined when sasuke comes back into the picture and thats my biggest issue. im sorry but if youre going to introduce a TRIO of main characters i want to see that main group equally fleshed out. first going all the way back to the beginning i wish that sakura was allowed to fight??? like we KNOW shes super smart and has powerful chakra so even when at that time she wasnt the most skilled fighter (as far as we KNOW at least. given that we barely got to see her fight who knows!) she couldve in the very least played a similar role to that of shikamaru as far as leadership and strategizing. and ok her crush on sasuke should have dissipated a lot more after the chunin exams. even though i do hate to see her spend so much time fawning over sasuke when hes not even particularly kind to her i think a crush in the beginning could still work IF the moment of her cutting her hair (“sasuke likes girls with long hair”) and her battle w ino during the chunin exams were like an eye-opening moment for her when she was like “wtf am i doing i am going to work hard as a ninja to prove that i can do this to MYSELF and MY RIVAL first” (which. ok she does get to this point later and again i love her learning chakra and getting strong as HELL during her training w tsunade but again. i want to see that REMAIN parallel to the enormous power level leaps that sasuke and naruto make. also let sakura and ino have a fun friendship rivalry that has nothing to do w sasuke) . i think it would be better if she naruto and sasuke were just friends who ALL help and motivate each other. and so when sasuke leaves sakura is STILL super fucked up over it and maybe even has a hard time trusting naruto again after he comes back? (but ofc she eventually does bc power of friendship) like IDK loss of one best friend, then almost immediately after your other best friend (who u just learned secretly is sealed w the nine tails and the akatsuki is after him just like orochimaru was after sasuke) leaves you for THREE YEARS??? kind of a salt in the wound moment! also im simply not even going to touch on all the comphet marriages in the end

next im going to talk about rock lee my friend rock lee who i adore. anyways he either should not have foregone the surgery from tsunade or died from it. HEAR ME OUT! this surgery was good in showing how powerful tsunade is as a healer but like? was it necessary? after she brought naruto back to life??? as far as lees characterization his whole thing is that he may not have special jutsu or the same prodigal abilities as his peers but he can still be as powerful or more powerful! and idk i hate when characters have serious life changing stuff done to them and not seeing it fully explored in the story. like ok so we’ve got tsunade telling lee (who cant be older than 12? 13?) theres a 50/50 chance he’ll die in the surgery to heal him. and then guy ENCOURAGES HIM, HIS FAVORITE STUDENT, to go through with the surgery so he could then go on to be a ninja and continue risking his life?????? so i thought that was pretty screwed up. which leads me to the two paths that i think would be interesting to see play out: 1. lee doesnt get the surgery, but continues to train as a ninja. his injuries still exist but lee learns to fight WITH the injuries and creates a really cool badass unique fighting style and goes on to be a great ninja like he dreamed 2. lee dies in surgery. id hate it i would and i dont WANT lee to die but it might be a fuckin wakeup call to all these adult ninjas urging kids into warfare. lee is beloved by all so it would be a good moment of pause for everyone to think like “ummm so the systems that be are kind of majorly fucked up.”

those are the two main ideas i had but heres a few misc things:

-jiraiya can be the author of as many trashy romance novels as he wants but him hitting on younger women and being like a peeping tom and UGH the way he was introduced w narutos ‘sexy jutsu’ is just. not good. take it out.

-let tsunade look her age. like the whole “she uses her chakra to make herself look young”? i dont buy it. i dont care that you just didnt feel like drawing a woman who looks over 20. you will do it anyways bc i said so.

-i dont dislike n/ruhina as much as i dislike s/susaku bc at least its clear theres a mutual respect and admiration there but hinata, like sakura, has so much more potential to be explored. idk if its looked at in filler or later in shippuden (id sure hope so) but i think her parallel to sasuke is kind of interesting? both have intimidating, extremely powerful older brothers (i know neji is technically hinatas cousin or smth but whatever older brother figures. also i know hinatas sister is also supposed to be super powerful but idk her yet) who are held in high esteem by their families and have all this pressure on their shoulders to want to surpass them? given that neji didnt um. do the things itachi did clearly its not the SAME between hinata and sasuke but i feel like examining the hyuga family dynamics would be SO interesting in comparison to sasukes arc. i didnt mind seeing hinata motivated by naruto the first few times but like. there is SO MUCH MORE THERE than JUST hinatas relationship to naruto.

-all of these kids need therapy but ESPECIALLY sasuke like the signs were there. halfway thru the bell test thing SUPER early on sasuke went into a full-fledged “i am an avenger.. i have to kill a certain someone” monologue and given the fact that everyone knows his entire clan was killed and that sasuke is likely VERY traumatized... who thought it was a good idea to let him become a ninja before addressing any of that. my god. like i love kakashi and i know he has his own devestating backstory and that hes a product of the system but why the Fuck would he let sasuke take the chunin exams. give team 7 a year more of training and getting to know each other and give sasuke some time to create bonds and maybe even open up emotionally and begin to heal and then MAYBE we can THINK ab chunin exams.

-asuma and ino apologize to choji for telling him not to eat as much challenge? did asuma not know that chojis clan uses food to replenish their chakra? it would make sense if ino didnt know but chojis teacher?? either way still p fucked, leave choji alone

-speaking of ino i want more of her character tok. why was she not included in that mission to save sasuke that shikamaru, her TEAMMATE, led?? was there an explanation for that?? i feel like her not being there was a missed opportunity for some real growth/bonding between team 10.

-speaking of the last bullet point shikamaru being like “ugh women 🙄” is tired and boring. very misogynistic “i hate my wife” facebook dad humor. cut that shit out

-orochimarus coding and his whole um. intent as a villain is just very. Hm. i dont think i like that very much but im not going to go into it bc im sure its been touched upon a million times

[36incheshigh]

haunting of bly manor on netflix review -

i tried not to put big spoilers in it. its about like.. a lady from america who becomes a live in nanny to two young siblings, in a big old mysterious? house in england.

overall - 8 /10 , maybe im just biased cause it had some of my fav parts of scary movies in it/personal fav parts of genres

[cons] -personally - i dont like when supposedly scary movies are about ppl dying sadly/theres characters who are actually nice who you actually get attached to and thenn, they suffer! (although technically i guesss that is what causes “haunting”, in its title. its like, im looking for a Scary which is secretly supposed to be found to be scary[-fun], not scary-Sad!. sad deaths/characters make me sad. like when cute kids in it are also sad and upset and they surely dont deserve it :p. bums me out. i guess i dont mind so much, if, -if youre gonna have to harm someone, that id rather theyre someone im not so attached to in the first place lols. id rather not feel sentimental whilee watching a movie thats also scary lols. too many feelings at once for me lols . also, i appreciate a movie tryingg to explain things well or make it interesting, but sometimes it cann get too complicated . thats where ya lose me. [thats kinda not that personal that can also be a critique in genderal.] its like if you keep it clear enough even if its simple, it could be a better story.

pros objectively - good characters, and gd chemistry between characters - they were all pretty distinct and interesting enough, had their own styles and mannerisms and personality. gd dialogue - relateable enough and realistic enough - heh ilke when the gardener tries to cheer the nanny up, that was like kind of a well thought out specific unique and still funny joke lols. or when the nanny uses her teacher-voice to say relateable things to the kids or to discipline them well and properly and fairly/justly and calmly - those were awesome and accurate like real life, very familiar in a specific, recognizable way. nicely done visually/cinematically - made everything look good, didnt make anything too confusing, clear enough. like it let us explore all the interesting places and no scenes were too dark to see whats going on or anything lols. which is good because sometimes a show takes place in what lookss like wouldd be an interesting setting, but we never really get to use the space much or see its details [well], or look at any of the cool parts about it, very well! plot was good - got stuck a couple times in a few ways, but atleast it did have good closure. thats hard to nail in spooky/scary stories. its also good that there was diversity representation in the characters’ races and kinds of romances so thats always important to diversify in the media so people arent ignorant and plus its less predictable and ^realistic.

cons objectively- really lost me in the episodes w hopping and flashbacks a lot, even though i guess it explained a few things. idk i think we couldve done without the entire dream bit cause it went over my head and i dont see thatt well how it fits with the rest of things very much anyway. i think it couldvee stuck with just the first owner’s story which seems to explain most of the mysteries anyway, and still be a great plot overall. also its not much of a big deal but in the end, that was supposed to be whats her name, the gardener but she wasnt even consistant in her style it was so out of character. like whats that hair style?? its too modern and boring/basic-betch , shes a chill, grounded, rough person so i think she shouldve kinda had a softer wavier hair style at least like she usually had . doesnt have to be the same, but atleast better match her character. i guess there were a few kind of minor plot pieces that i didnt hear/understand their explaination . but maybe if i thought about it more, or figure that those were just idk symbolic details or something lols, then id get it. -atleast the most important plot points have been explained. or if they kept the confusing plotline to help explain things, i wish they couldve made it a bit simpler to be more understandable . aint nobody tryina think that hard about it to understand things in a show ha . idk i think the wind up leading to the end , through the middle of the last episode when we werent sure if the girl was doomed yet or not [is that what it was that dragged on for me?] , dragged on a bit too somehow. or i wouldve been happy too if it ended like 10 minutes into the last episode when everything was at peace, even though thats too peaceful of an ending for a spooky story lols. also the bride in the beginning and ending who hears the story is a kind of bad actress or has awkward lines so it makes things corny lols. which its hard to not cross that line in spooky stories, from believeable and relateable and genuine enoughh to spook ya cause its barely believeable/relateable, - into corny.

pros personally- love big old gothic houses, theyve got character. love love stories, and mixing genres in a show or movie! like love, sad, and spooky. love it being more spooky and a thinker kinda rather than gory which could always be too easy of a scare. and lots of botony heh [in the romance] which i always love. in real life heh. i also dont really like body horror lols even though it couldve been worse here i guess. i know its supposed to be like, symbolic though :p. i like how - there wass a specific message/themes they were trying to be about in this show, but - idk, before we realizedd that, it was kind of amusing how the random suspicious jumpscares/problems that happen aree kinda like, making you/trickingg you to thinkk, that the story could justt be any of the clichee scary stories - but thenn its a pleasant surprise that even though you thought it was gonna be a cliche predictable plot, its actually much more elaborate in a good way lols. i also like “”gothic”“ and kinda spooky but not likeee verY scarY ha. cause gothic is likee, a lookk/mood!!

so yeah, i liked this in general, and would recommend it in general and might watch most of it again in halloween season lols. i like it because its sophisticated and relateable enough, graceful, cute enough - balanced so its not tooo much of anythingg and just enoughh of different things that would make any show enjoyable enoughh, i thinkk . good in all the ways it matters, in all the important ways. generally doesnt get campy in the parts of the show where that would matter lols. i liked it better than the other series apparently also by this director or whatever, “haunting of hill house”. i think “bly manor” was better in nearly  every way lols .

#reviews #tv #haunting of bly manor #on netflix #spooky #halloween season shows to watch possibly!

[fiftyshadesgrl]

This is part one of a brantley gilbert series im working on. Hope everyone enjoys it.

Is this the wrong thing to do? After everything that went down between me and Brantley, should I really be doing a meet and greet with him? The last time we were in a room together a lot of words were said and our relationship ended. I thought we were going to last forever. We were engaged, I was planning a wedding while Brantley was drinking himself into a early grave. As I pull up to the venue my hands start sweating and I seriously think about backing out, but he has sure come a long way and I just want him to know that I am proud of him.

45 minutes later

Its my turn next in the meet and greet. All of the fans stand behind a curtain until it is our turn. Security motions for me to head out to see Brantley. I take a deep breath and realize its now or never. I walk from around the curtain and Brantleys eyes go wide. "(Y/N), is that you?" I smile and nod, he opens his arms and grabs me. This feels so good, just like it used to. His strong arms is what made me feel safe. I sigh and start to tear up but then I pull away.

He smiles and eyes me up and down. "(Y/N), youre the last person I thought would walk around that curtain."

I place my hand on the side of his face and wish things were different. "I just wanted to come and tell you how proud I am of you."

"Well darlin, you couldve called." He says with a sigh. I cant believe Im standing here in front of him. Those blue eyes just peer into my soul. My heart skips a beat when I hear his songs on the radio. Sometimes I feel like some of them has been written just for me.

Security tells Brantley they need to wrap up the meet and greet. Brantley looks annoyed but he has a show to put on and many fans that he cant let down.

We get our picture taken and then he turns to me. He grabs my hands in his, "do you have a backstage pass?" I shake my head and say, "no just vip."

He called his manager over and whispered something in his ear. His manager produced a backstage pass. Brantley took it from him and handed it to me. "Here darlin, you can watch from backstage and then we can hang out afterwards."

I shook my head, "Brantley I cant accept this. I dont want you doing me favors."

He placed it around my neck. "Then this is a favor for me. Please I really want to talk to you after the show."

How could I say no to him. He really looked sincere and there is some things that I could get off my chest after the show. So I nod and he has the biggest smile on his face. "Thank you (Y/N). It really means alot to me."

"Youre welcome." I go to hug him and he surprises me by kissing me on my forehead. His manager leads me to Brantleys dressing room. "Make yourself at home honey."

"Thank you. Is it alright if I smoke in here?" I ask showing him my pack of cigarettes. He chuckles, "BG is like a chimney. Ash tray is on the table. Drinks and snacks are in the other room if you want anything. If you need anything else just holler."

I nod and light my cigarette as he walks out the door. Its really nice in here. A big leather couch is against one wall right across is a mirror with lights around it. A chair sits in front of it but Brantley doesnt seem the type to need makeup to go on stage. I put my cigarette out in the ash tray and sit back in the couch. It feels like a cloud. I look around trying to find something to occupy me, I flip through my phone. I snap a picture and send it to my best friend with a text saying 'guess i get to go backstage.'

He sends a text back saying 'be careful. Dont let him hurt you again.' I roll my eyes and shut my phone off. I get up and decide to go get something to drink. When I open the door Brantley is on the other side, I think he was giving hisself a pep talk before coming in. He looks worried, "youre not bolting already are you?"

I shake my head. "No, I was going to get something to drink." He sighs like he is glad that I wasnt leaving.

"You mind if I come with you?" He asks shyly.

"Of course not. This is all for you anyways."

We walk down the hall to the room that has the sign catering on the door. He holds the door open for me and as I enter his hand brushes mine. I feel the sparks way down deep and I know he does too.

After we enter the room I grab a water and he gets a plate of food and a tea. The room is quite crowded and noisy. He looks at me and asks, "wanna go back to the dressing room?" I shrug and mouth its up to you. He nods towards the door and I follow him. He pushes the door open and holds it for me.

When we get back to the dressing room he plops down on the couch and puts his feet up on the table. I sit down on the other end of the couch and he looks like he is affended. "What are you doing all the way down there darlin? I aint gonna bite ya."

I smile and scoot closer to him. I take a sip of my water and light another cigarette. I smoke alot when Im stressed or nervous.

"Wheres your food darlin?" He asks looking at my bottle of water.

"Oh, um." I look down at my hands. "Im not hungry."

He shakes his head, "no, I aint having it. Youre gonna eat. Here take my plate Ill go get some more."

Before I could say anything he placed his plate in my lap and was already out the door. I really wasnt hungry. My nerves were getting the best of me and my stomach was in knots.

Brantley came back in a few minutes later with two huge plates of food. I raised my eyebrows at him as he sat down. "You dont expect me to eat that do you Brantley?"

He shook his head, "no one plate for me and the desserts are for both of us."

I picked at my food as we talked about old times and before I knew it they were calling him for the show. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the couch.

"Come on (Y/N), you can watch from the side."

He opened strong and the crowd went wild. After a few upbeat songs he pulled out his acoustic and sat on a stool center stage.

"Welcome everybody yall are amazing."

The crowd cheered loudly as he took a sip of water. He looked over at me and winked causing a face splitting grin to appear on my face.

"I figured wed slow it down a bit for a while. These next few songs mean alot to me. I wrote them for someone special and maybe just maybe."

He looks over at me again.

"She just might hear them tonight."

He starts playing the best of me and glances at me every now and then. Then he starts you dont know her like I do. Then he finishes with you promised. He gets emotional during that song and he looks directly over to me when he sings the last line.

"No matter what you do, you know Ill always love you.

Hell I have to, cause I promised."

The tears streamed down my face. I knew he meant it and after all these years, deep in my heart. I knew I still l loved him. I never stopped, but thats what scares me. Hes changed yes but how could I forget the past?

He was still looking at me as I turned and walked back to the dressing room. I couldnt let him see me cry, so I sat in the dressing room and cried. I went to light my cigarette but couldnt find my lighter anywhere. Brantleys lighter was gone too.

My eyes went to his duffel bag and thought maybe he might have a spare lighter in there. I unzipped it and tried not to look to much at anything but I felt a lighter and as I pulled it out a paper came flying out too.

"Oh shit, I hope It didnt rip."

I picked it up, a picture fell to the floor. I bent to pick it up and saw it was the last picture me and Brantley had made together. That was the better days before everything went bad. I cant believe he has kept it all this time.

"Yall have been awesome tonight! I love yall see ya again soon."

I heard Brantley closing the show so I shoved the paper and picture back in his bag and zipped it quickly. I grabbed my cigarettes and ran to the exit.

The cool air hit my skin like a gift from heaven. I had to take a breather for a moment cause I didnt know what to say to him. Why has he kept that all this time? Why did it make me smile that he did? Because I love him but I cant tell him. Tonight was just to see him and go home.

I sit with my back against the building and lit my cigarette. I looked down at the lighter in my hand and was surprised to see it was the zippo I got him for his birthday one year. This man, does he keep everything.

The band starts coming out of the doors and start loading the bus with equipment and luggage. A few minutes later Brantley came struting out looking frustrated. He couldnt see me because I was sitting behind the door.

I heard him say to his manager, "why didnt you stop her! I need to go find her."

Before he climbed the steps on the bus I stood up and said "you looking for me?"

I could see the relief wash over him. He ran over to me and grabbed me up in a big hug. "I thought I lost you again baby girl."

I smiled and pulled away from him. "Im right here. I just needed some air." He grabbed me by the back of my head and pulled me in for a fierce kiss. It shocked me for a second then I was kissing him back. Our tounges exploring each other mouth. I nipped his lower lip and he growled in response.

I pulled away but he rested his forehead on mine. We were both panting and I managed to find the words. "Brantley, I....I cant do this."

"Come on the bus with me, we can talk cause theres some stuff I need to tell you."

"I dont think thats a good idea Brantley."

He sighs and those blue eyes pierce right into the depths of my soul and break down whatever barriers I had built to keep him out.

"Please, just to talk. I promise."

I nod, "okay, just to talk."

He smiles and grabs my hand. He leads me towards the bus and motions for me to go first. He doesnt speak to anyone but heads straight for his room. He closes the door behind him.

He sits down on the bed and pats the place next to him.

"You can sit baby doll, dont worry I wont do anything."

"I know, I trust you." I sit down next to him but for some reason the words that I have been wanting to say will not come out. Thank god he spoke first.

"Listen (Y/N), I know the last time we saw each other I was a complete mess."

"Complete mess is putting it lightly." I say

He sighs, "ok, I was a complete dick. I know I hurt you and I said things I didnt mean. I swear to you I have changed. I love you (Y/N) I always have, and if you give me a chance." He grabs my hand and I look into his eyes. "I promise you I will make up for everything baby."

I really do believe him but why is it so hard to just give myself to him. "You cheated on me Brantley. You told me you didnt want me anymore. I wanted to marry you and have a family with you. I saw all of that happening but it was all just one big lie."

"Baby look at me." He says as he places his fingers under my chin. My eyes meet his once again. "Im so sorry for everything. After all these years it still eats at me what I done to you. I was fucked up at the time. The booze and pills had me all kinds of fucked up but it didnt mean I didnt want you. I honestly cant tell you why I said that but I can tell you I didnt mean it." I start crying and try to look away but he wouldnt let me.

"You were the best thing that ever happened to me and I was to stupid to realize it. I shouldve treated you better when I had you but for some reason I thought you would always be there. When I sobered up and realized you was really gone I went crazy. I went everywhere and anywhere that I thought you would be. I cried every night and every day I felt like my heart was just gone."

I wiped my eyes and whispered, "Im so sorry Brantley."

"No, no baby, Im the one whos sorry. I dont blame you for leaving me. Hell nobody did. Mama jumped my case everyday for a month about it."

I sniffed, "I found the picture of us in your duffel bag."

"You did?"

I nodded, "I wasnt being nosey I promise. I lost my lighter and couldnt find it or yours so I thought maybe you had a extra one. I didnt look at anything or at the piece of paper the picture fell out of."

He sighed and it looked like he was glad I didnt read it. "I kept that picture because thats all I had of you. Every night before a show looking at it would give me the boost I needed to have a damn good show. When I sleep, I put it under my pillow. I know its stupid but I have to have you with me or I cant survive."

I smile and before I knew it I was kissing him. He kissed me back at first then he gently pushed me away. "Woah baby, you said you only wanted to talk."

I straddled him and pushed his hat from his head. "I know what I said." I kissed his cheeks then his eyes then his lips. "Listen to what my heart is saying now."

His hands were on my sides sliding up and down, his thumbs were under my shirt. He was tracing lazy circles with them. He leaned forward and kisses my collarbone then my neck. "You sure baby." I nodded.

I pulled his shirt up and over his head. He did the same to me. I was wearing a black lace bra, he growled as he kissed the tops of my breast where the lace touched skin.

"God damn baby, I have been missing and wanting this all these years. Im afraid its a dream."

I smiled as I kissed up his neck up to his ear. I whispered "trust me honey, I dont think your dreams can make you feel as good as Im gonna in just a few minutes."

"Holy fuck." He said as he pulled away and took my lips in a searing kiss. He unclasped my bra with one hand. My hand skated down his chest and stomach and came to rest on his belt buckle.

"Make love to me Brantley."

He smiled, "oh baby, with pleasure."

#brantleygilbert #bgnation #bg #brantleygilbertfanfic #brantleygilbertsmut

[monstersandmaw]

I'm about to spout a series of completely unrelated things, so I'm gonna put my little nickname at the end of each one lol. First off (this is random, but I enjoy telling you things cause you're so nice and supportive so sorry if its weird???) I'm nonbinary/gender-fluid (not sure which term I want to use yet), and when I came out to my mom and asked to get a binder so I could explore, she yelled at me for 2 hours straight. This was years ago, and now shes more open-minded (pt. 1) -BitterMnM

(Pt. 2) so I asked again if I could get a binder, and she said I can do whatever and she will support me (shes even getting me a suit for graduation!!!) But… after her yelling at me, I never researched how to get a binder, or anything like that, and I’m still afraid shes hate me if I got one (even if all that has been cleared up). So I figured a sports bra would work, and it does! And I’ve been using it at home, but today im going out into public and im nervous but excited. -BitterMnM          

(Pt. 3) Second, I know you havent written anything for him yet (when it comes to romance), but Maro from Rhett’s story is SO CUTE and he kinds reminds me of my OC Damari. I’d love to draw Maro if you gave a description of him (or if it’s in the story already, I can go back and look on my own), and maybe even draw Dama as well to show you what I mean lol. -BitterMnM   

(Pt. 4) aaand lastly, do/did you ever feel like you arent a true writer sometimes? I ask because I’ve taken advanced art class (it’s like majoring in college tbh) throughout middle and high school, and I feel like my peers have grown more than me. It makes me feel like i shouldnt call myself an artist. Do you have any advice for working around that feeling? I know I’m good, it’s just hard reminding myself of that, and my friend’s reassurance always sounds fake. -BitterMnM

(Pt. 5) not because they’re mean or I’m paranoid (for lack of a better word), but just because I’m so negative when it comes to myself. I shouldnt be, I know theres a reason I’m still in the art magnet (that’s what the classes are called), because I couldve been kicked out if I sucked or reached my full potential. But the feeling makes me not want to do art, and it is limiting me, and I hate it. Also, sorry for the long asks!!! >_

***********************

I’m sorry you didn’t get off to the best start about exploring your identity with your mum. I know it can be tough, but I’m glad she turned out a little more supportive in the end - I hope that only continues from hereon in. Sounds like a great idea with the sports bras! (As an aside, I wear sports bras pretty much all the time :D)

Maro’s description is probably in the story somewhere, but he’s kind of slim and elegant, with eternally boyish good looks and wild, curly pink hair. Since he’s a cherry blossom dryad, I imagine him as a soft, baby pink all over, and constantly with little cherry blossoms swirling around him. I’d love to see a drawing of him with your OC! I’m sure they’d get along and be good friends :).

As for not feeling like a true writer, yes, I’m sure a lot of people can identify with that whole ‘imposter/fraud’ feeling. For very many years I was ashamed or embarrassed about being a writer, and never told anyone that I wrote. I still don’t let the people who know me in real life read what I write (monster or otherwise), but now I’m very open about it. It was hard, and I felt very awkward about ‘admitting’ it, but now when someone asks me what I do, I say that I make jewellery, and that I’m a writer. Because I am. I write.

You are an artist because you create and you draw. Fact. You are an artist. Compare how you drew this time last year to how you draw now, and I bet you’ll be surprised at how far your art has evolved and developed. It’s hard to see that kind of change when you’re right in the middle of it all though, so take some time and be kind to yourself too. Being in an environment like a class is always hard because you have constant reminders that there are other people doing the same thing, but honestly, try and focus on your own progress. As you say, if you weren’t dedicated and good at what you do, they might have taken you to one side and said something. It’s also hard to enjoy what you have to do either for a living or for your college degree or whatever because there’s always that element of pressure. Maybe one weekend, take a sketch pad outside and just draw for yourself? That way you can lay claim to it again, and remind yourself of the joy of creating…?

Good luck with everything!!

#binder #bra #dryad #creative advice #being creative is really tough sometimes! #anon ask #ghosti speaks

[beesbooksblog-blog]

BBR #1-”Flawed” by Kate Arelynn

I decided to start this series after i finished this book, however it’s been 3 weeks since ive finished it, so admittedly my memory is a little fogged on what exactly i hated about it. ill do my best though. sorry about the lack of punctuation and capitalization :/. tumblr showed me how to bold and italicize things but i dont remember. haha nvm im acting like anyone will read this lmao. this is for my own enjoyment. moving on

“flawed” is genuinely one of the worst books if not the worst book ive ever read, ever. well i guess thats not entirely true since i totally ate it up within two weeks but from a logical perspective its bad in my opinion. 

 its hard to really review this having read it so long ago but ill recall best i can. 

                                                   -SPOILERS-

again, like anybody besides myself is reading this.anyways, i went into this book very hopeful. the storyline seemed very interesting, the synopsis on the back of the novel describing the relationship between two siblings. the older brother protecting his younger sister from their abusive father and asking for seemingly incestuous affection in return. not saying i like abuse or incest, but like most people touchy taboo subjects as such are fascinating to read and watch about. 

my first major problem with this book was its representation of child abuse and the way it takes a very generic stereotypical approach. I’m not saying there arent cases where the abusive dad is a raging drunk who beats his kids with his belt for no reason all the time because that absolutely happens, its just not usually like that in real life. often times abusers can be manipulative and more 3 dimensional than so many novels make them out to be. (3 dimensional as in, they are able to be nice or even compassionate whether it be for their own personal gain or not. not in a they are good people who nobody understands 3 dimensional way). i guess thats a picky critique but im so tired of reading about the same abusive dad in these ya novels.

second major problem was the character of james. i dont feel like the book necessarily glorified his behavior but it didnt exactly reprimand it either. either way, his manipulative controlling actions were just unpleasent to read about. throughout the book i got increasingly frusterated with how awful of a person he was and while i dont think the author was shedding his behavior in a positive light i still feel like the tone of the novel was to make me feel like sarah was in the wrong for wanting to be with sam because james would be hurt. its so rediculous.

and then of course, sam. I HATE PERFECT BOYS WITH SAD BACK STORIES. do they exist? yeah, i guess so. but its so easy to write a catchy book just by putting an attractive love interest who has issues in it. sam is not a bad character per say, i think hes cheaply written but it didnt pain me to read his interactions with sarah in the same way james did. i honestly dont love to read about romance and relationships so most of the scenes with james and sarah were cringey but thats kind of my own problem. i think he was really dramatic alot for no reason “omg lets get married” but whatever. also him purposely trying to get james to walk in him and sarah having sex was questionable but it was barely addressed so :/

okay my next problem was the super unnecessary amount of sex or passages relating to sex in this book? it literally just feels the author forgot what the book was supposed to be about and just started writing spin off twilight. on my life there is almost no incest in this book. james clearly has a weird crush on sarah but sarah does not give him any affection (unless shes sleeping oml). theres more incest between sarah and her dad than there is with her and james which is not what i came to read about. (but seriously, the climax with sarahs dad trying to rape her was awful and disgusting, there literally couldve been a different way to get rid of him). but yeah i knew they were gonna have sex so it could do the whole protagonist is insecure about her body thing but did they need to do it more than once and did it need to be talked about so frequently?\

there is so much more to talk about like their mom, the ENDING (jesus), but this book is just tiring to write about. overall, the writing was bad, sometimes it was actually laughably bad which i suppose is good because atleast i got some entertainment from it. i knew this book was bad one chapter in which is so sad because i really did have alot of hope for this one. 

im not gonna rate the books i review because thats alot of thinking but on my TBR i give each book a check, ex, or squig after i finish it and this one gets a phat ex. 

most quotable line: “not when sams tongue is exploring my mouth”

lmk what other books i should add to my TBR!

[inv1s]

Enjoy exploring our future. Enjoy the Intraspace! 

         Violet knows the other her was here. She knows they don’t have too much time left, and if either of them wanted to continue existing, things had to be done. What she doesn’t know is what she’s going to say to the other her. As Violet travels to the location specified by the phone app, she thought over and over about what she wanted and what was best for the both of them. Because through everything... from the surge of fond memories and the lasting bonds, Violet knows Vi was happy here. Her? ...She’s afraid to answer. 

        Either way, she’s here in a white tee and sweatpants. She just has to find someone that looks exactly like her — should be easy. Violet’s not surprised, but after asking a few of the Intraspace’s inhabitants, she quickly learns that Vi is rather well known in these parts. The other her was probably way better with technology than she was, which makes sense.

         Anyway, Violet finds Vi in the MMO Zone, catching her at what seemed to be a decent time. Preparing for a dungeon expedition, Vi is clad in black robes, accompanied with a small pocket knife. A... rogue... if she remembers correctly. Still, even as Violet approaches, Vi doesn’t show any sign of hostility, rather, it seems like she was waiting for her.

         “There you finally are,” Vi laughs, sheathing her knife.

         Violet’s not sure how the other knew she was coming for her but relieved, she cracks a tiny smile. “If you were waiting for me, you could’ve waited in somewhere less... obscure.”

         “Sorry. I got bored,” she shrugs.

         “I don’t blame you. This app thing is still new to me so I couldn’t come faster even if I wanted to.” Attempting to pull out her phone, Violet realizes she was in the digital world and instead pulls out an empty flask.

         A chuckle escapes and Vi takes the flask off her hands. “Looks like you’ll have to look for the app in a carrier pigeon instead.” She places a hand on the other’s shoulder as if gripping for her composure back. Nevertheless, she knew why the other was here, and she was ready, willing even. If it meant that both of them would live without this virus plaguing them, a quick agreement was nothing. “So? I can meet you in person and this’ll be over quickly.”

         But Violet pauses, hesitates to log out ( not because she doesn’t know how to ). “Wait —“ She lets out a sharp exhale as her mind races. Was there a better way? Though she wanted Vi to return to a happier dimension, free from whatever the hell this was, she didn’t want to stay here. She wouldn’t wish this on anyone, so if she wanted to be satisfied with her decision, she couldn’t just agree to this. “Vi...? What if... there’s a way for you to go back but — I...” her gaze breaks and she squeezes her eyes shut.

         Concern overwhelms Vi’s features and her lips fall into a frown. While they didn’t share the same mind or memories, Vi heard, knows the other deserves happiness whether that was here or wherever she calls home. She deserved that at the very least, to make such a decision for herself. And if it meant that her existence would become nothing then... Vi’s willing to take the risk. She knows she’s not the real Violet, that she’s just another dimension’s version of her. It pains her to even try to accept the fact — that her life is easily replaceable and means nothing in the grand scheme of things. Even still... she wants to live the life she’s built for herself. But could they both be happy...? “Violet... We can talk about this — let’s talk about it. Whatever’s on your mind. Whatever you think that will make you happiest because... you deserve at least that...”

         “But you’ll —“

         “Yeah I will but... I’m not the real Violet Parr with superpowers and a cool family...” Her eyes start to sting as her nose scrunches, holding back whatever it was that wanted to spill.

         ...Meeting the other’s gaze, Violet mirrors a sorrowful frown. “I’m not you either! I’m not Violet Traux with the sweetest of friends, and a normal student. Do you know how much I’ve wanted that? — my whole life. So you can’t just — “ at this point, she has to wipe her nose with her white tee. “You can’t just say you’re not real and that... you’re okay with going away like that.”

         Vi listens but her heart isn’t in it. “Even still, it’s because of you that I’m able to have all this. It’s because of your existence that another reality was even possible for me here.” Wasn’t there a way for both of them to be happy?

         “But I didn’t choose to come here... or stay.”

         “You just haven’t found your reason to stay.”

         “That’s easier said than done. I’ve tried and have been trying. For months... but I don’t — I don’t feel any attachment to this place...”

         Resisting the urge to slap the real her across the face for spewing such absurd words, Vi instead grits her teeth, tightening the fist by her side. “You can’t hear how ridiculous you sound right now, but you sound ridiculous. How can you even say that right now? What will your mom think? And the friends that you’ve made? They’d be heartbroken to hear that from you. Aren’t connections enough? What more do you need? A million dollars? A significant other? The rest of your family to be dragged into this city? Because having your baby brother living with god knows what kinds of people is better than you suffering here alone? I can’t believe you could be so selfish, Violet.” Her tone, accusatory and sharp, slices the thick silence between them.

         Violet feels the need to apologize, wants to but she knows that won’t accomplish anything. She feels sorry for herself, not the other her. Prolonging the conversation with another retort didn’t seem like the best idea either. But she's right. She is being selfish. But when her happiness depended on having the loving people around her with her, it’s immensely difficult to transition without them. She swallows with a parched throat. “You’re right... I am selfish. But it’s been a long six months and I — I don’t know how much longer I can keep trying — “

         “ — You’re not listening to me, Violet. You need to be even more selfish. You want to get out of here? Great. Do it, find that exit. But you can’t do it alone. There are so many people who feel the same as you do but you still think you’re suffering alone. Wrong. All wrong. There are some things you can lean on others for, and you don’t have to feel like a burden to them. You don’t have to pretend like you have all your crap together. You don’t have to live like a zombie just to count the days. You don’t have to do any of those things. Maybe I’m not the right person to tell you this so take this with a grain of salt: but you have to find the smallest bit of joy you can and hold on to it. Forever and ever, until your heart can no longer handle it. As long as you can make your time here worth the trip, I’ll... fully support you.”

         “...” At a complete loss of words, Violet internalizes Vi’s advice. With her escalating pulse and shaky frame, she finally nods.

        “Anyway... I’ve been playing for a while so my head’s splitting in two. But... I’ll be waiting for you.

         You just have to come.”

...

#{ isola event ;; #event: subversion part 2 #{ drabble ;; #{ character development?? who is she } #long post