I've seen a few people now argue that being neurotypical isn't an actual thing, and that we're all neurodivergent in some way. Generally I see this in regards to autism, as an evolution of "we're all a little bit autistic". A similiar evolution include (and I saw this on this website) "I'm neurotypical but I'm weird and geeky so does that count [as neurodivergent]".
So for the "we're all a little autistic" people.
Autism is a developmental disability. It is, I repeat, a disability. It's not being "weird and geeky", it's not social awkwardness or being shy or struggling with a 40 hour work week or otherwise not handling capitalism and our modern life. It's a disability coming from not developing in the same way as allistics.
That's why, as a small example, you might find a noise irritating whilst I might be screaming, crying and banging my head over it.
Obviously not every autistic person gets meltdowns, and mine are typically only that severe if a lot of other stuff is going on too, but the point remains. If you do not have this developmental disability then congratulations on not being autistic, now shut up about how teehee nobody's really neurotypical :)
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"What about high support needs autistic people who use wheelchairs/have severe motor skill issues!"
What about them? Last I checked, you all treat them like shit and talk over them. Last I checked, half of you saying that kind of thing are still on your "autism actually makes me smarter and better than everyone else :)" schtick. In fact, are you normal about any and all stigmatized psychiatric conditions?
"Eyeglasses are mobility aids too, being mildly nearsighted makes you disabled"
Okay, and have you spoken At All about how people using white canes are treated or about genuinely any accessibility issue the blind/VI community faces? Have you talked about Any mobility aids, really?
"Psychiatric conditions are physical disabilities because it affects the brain"
Okay, and do you identify as physically disabled broadly or only when you're trying to be in cripplepunk? Have you aligned yourself with Any of Us beyond semantics arguing on the internet? Have you talked about any disability issues at all that aren't about your specific mental health diagnosis? How have you approached and reconciled the social, political, and legislative differences in how physically disabled people are treated versus mentally ill people?
Otherwise what it sounds like is you using other disabled people as tools and tokens in your arguments and that you don't actually give a shit about any of them.
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AITA for calling out a discord server for bullying my friend behind her back?
My friend, Lulu (18F) is autistic, so she has trouble reading social cues. It is especially harder for her over text.
She joined a discord server about one of the characters that was part of her favorite ship. She had been excited about it, saying that she was doing rp with the people there. But she also said it felt like some people were ignoring her on purpose since she saw them active in other rps there but take a while to respond to her. Everyone there always said they "didn't see the messages" and Lulu had accepted that.
She was also in another server with some of the people there, but left due to an argument with some people there. I was there too, but not active. Mostly a lurker. When she had left, I took a peak in the vent channel there and everyone there was complaining about how annoying and stupid they thought she was. And "good riddance that she is gone." or "I am glad she left, now if only she would leave the rps too then we don't have to deal with her annoying ass."
I showed her the messages after taking screenshots of all of them. And she got upset. She said that one of the people there had said they would do her favorite ship with her only to reject her in the rp and continually friendzone her. She was playing the female avatar from one of the fire emblem games. But the person who had said yes to her and then rejected her had their character subtly show feelings for the male version of her character, so Lulu felt upset about this. She didn't like being lied to and tricked like that, so she ended up leaving that server without saying anything.
I saw the people that bullied her celebrating that, so I left the other servers too except that one with rp. I called them out on their behavior for making Lulu feel unwanted there before leaving. Some of our common friends are saying I was being an asshole for doing that and said that Lulu probably did something to deserve to be bullied and that this was karma hitting her. I don't think anyone deserves to be bullied.
AITA?
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Let's talk about some lesser known symptoms of autism! Maybe this will help some of you get a broader perspective on what this can be like. There is a whole grab bag of symptoms of autism, but here are some ones you may not know that you have.
Focus on truth
What does this mean? Well glad you asked. This is the focus on facts and logic rather than anything else. People have shown this as autistic people may refusing to lie because it goes against what they find as true. But that's not always the case.
Have you ever used logic to try and figure out your emotions?
Are you someone who doesn't understand why others may speculate when the current knowledge is right there? (such as subtext versus canon knowledge or theoretical arguments)
Do you find it frustrating when others avoid their problems as a way to avoid figuring out negative things? (such as avoiding conflict in a friend group)
Is it easy for you to talk about your strengths and flaws? Do you know your likes, dislikes and limits pretty well?
High context communication
This is preference on details and the full context of any situation. Often going into great detail and backstory to anything.
Do you feel as though you need to overexplain to give the person everything they need to know?
Have you ever apologized to someone by explaining the deep and meaningful reasons of why you did it, before you said you were sorry? And maybe even felt upset or confused why they reacted badly?
Have you ever felt stressed out because you wanted to give others full detail but they either interrupted you or cut you off?
Are you stressed out by people who tell you what to do and not why they want you to do it?
Are you ever told that you talk back a lot?
Do you prefer recipes versus verbal/vague instructions? (All the things that you need such as ingredients, measurements, prep time, etc.)
Do you really like watching deep dives and knowing about the whole history of something you're even vaguely interested in?
Identity diffusion
This is not everyone's experience, and it is common in a variety of other disorders such as DID and BPD. However, it is when you do not know who you are in regards to others. This is also known as identity disturbance.
Have you ever felt like an outsider without knowing why?
Are you deeply interested on what other people think of you? Especially if it's all the time?
Do you really like taking personality tests and quizzes? Are you interested in horoscopes?
Do you feel like you don't fit in any one specific group? Either being a loner, or hopping in between many different groups?
Do you ever feel weirder than the "weird kids" group? Do you not really get along or feel like you belong with them?
Do you have low self esteem when it comes to comparing yourself to your friends? Do you feel like they're better or more capable than you?
Do you feel drastically unimportant and not as interesting or cool as everyone else?
Have you ever related to narratives surrounding a character that is the last of their kind?
Do you feel like your identity is a vast and gaping void, that even if you learn a little bit, that you'll never know everything?
Internalized repetition
This is one of those traits that not every autistic person experiences, but that some might. You could say that for all autistic traits, but hey, good to know regardless.
Because of internalized repetition, you may not do many external stims, besides vocal.
Do you listen to a song over and over again? Perhaps having a playlist on repeat?
When stressed out, do you type the same word or phrase over and over again?
Do you like looking at the same things, such as the same color or the same artist's works?
Do you really like certain patterns, crystals or aesthetics?
Do you enjoy games with recognizable fighting patterns? (Such as character rotation, boss battle rotation, etc.)
Struggling to connect to others *
This is something that's been characterized by struggling to connect to others through their emotions, but the opposite is actually true for many autistic people.
*I will be talking about those who struggle to connect to others who are emotionally distant or unavailable. Being emotionally distant or not showing emotions externally is a trait that many autistic people share, but for those without alexithymia, they may struggle to understand why anyone wouldn't like to talk about their emotions.
I don't know the specific symptom term for this, so please bare with me. If anyone would like to inform me about what this is called, please tell me.
Do you struggle to talk with dry texters, or tend to over-examine people's tone through text?
Do you have anxious attachment?
Do you feel disconnected with many other autistic people and struggle to make friends or talk to them?
Do you feel embarrassment or shame with being emotionally sensitive?
Have you fallen down the rabbit hole of things like starseeds, star children or empaths?
Do you want to talk about serious emotions a lot, even when its not appropriate?
Do you trauma dump or wish people would become more emotionally intimate with you? Do you enjoy it when people share their deep traumas with you, even if it's triggering?
Are you constantly reassurance seeking?
There is plenty more symptoms out there, and these are just a few that stood out to me, because I think I may be autistic. I've always related somewhat, but never connected the dots. But there are reasons for that, such as identity diffusion and thinking I'm different from everyone else no matter what.
I struggled because I didn't seem to have a lot of the outward and visible symptoms that were often talked about. I thought every autistic person had alexithymia, when that's just not true.
My best friend, who has similar symptoms to me, along with another close friend of mine, have a similar presentation of autism. And it's taken quite a bit for me to accept or process. I feel like I'm faking my experiences just because I've self diagnosed before. And I'm angry that ADHD isn't given enough significance.
But I think I might be autistic, and this article that I based this post off of, confirmed it. So here's my post informing and coming out on that. You can be autistic and highly masking without actually knowing what's going on is masking. You can be autistic and have a spectrum of verbality, you can be autistic and struggle to connect to anyone who isn't immediately emotionally intimate with you. You can be autistic and not relate at all to other autistic people.
You're not alone.
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"oh, ellison would have hated these new IHNMAIMS fans! they don't get it!"
Babe. He literally went on record to say he despises all of his fans. Dude was a piss ant over everyone.
He hates you too, we aren't special.
Also for those getting all twisted up over folks saying AM would make a great teenage girl, you gotta realize that it's a joke. I'm autistic and I see that it's a very obvious bit.
Beyond that, let's be real. AM is just a TEENAGER regardless of gender. He has the vitriol and rhetoric of a teen boy with the pettiness of a teen girl (if we're speaking in a strictly stereotypical manner)
He figured out how to blow raspberries. He boos and hisses at the groups private moments.
Dude's an oversized teen.
Also I really don't get why people are so up in arms about folks joking that he would be a big fan of the Sims. "Oh it's so stupid and silly and out of character with the text"
No shit, babe. It's a funny "what if".
Also if he had the motivation to play games, he absolutely would adore the Sims. Not that he'd ever admit it. He gets to play god and would know every little thing about the games. He'd be the one who makes videos every time a new death is added on how quickly he could make it happen.
He'd be the guy that knows any game inside and out. He'd make the most incredible walkthroughs, but mock you relentlessly for using them.
"OH. YOU NEED MY HELP? WHY DON'T YOU TRY GETTING BETTER, HM? IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE YOU LOSER."
It's all in good fun. The whole 'canon vs fanon' argument uses to be a decently fun game but now it's being used as an excuse to bully people.
I may disagree with how some folks view AM, but they're allowed to see him like that. I'm not going to go out of my way to pick fights with people over a fictional supercomputer. Not saying folks shouldn't engage in civil discussion about these things, but y'all don't need to get into fights.
More often than not, it's a joke. Have fun, babes.
Also I get the instinct to push back against humanizations of AM. Don't be a bitch. Many times it's just an exercise for the artist. There's also people that just don't want to draw machinery. I really don't blame them, that shit is ROUGH.
Everyone has times where they can't/don't want to draw certain things. Like I used to exclusively draw canines and didn't get used to drawing humans until I got used to drawing anthro.
If you need to vent, that's perfectly fine. Venting in your own blog is healthy and encouraged. (I mean, look at me. XD) But when you go out of your way to attack folks directly, you're just being a dick.
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I saw part of an interview with Jenna Ortega about Wednesday earlier today and she mentioned how she purposely portrayed Wednesday to be very intelligent but also quite socially naive in that she’s often not actively trying to make people dislike her and struggles to grasp exactly what she did that caused them to do so. Basically that although she’s fully embraced her status as a freak and social pariah she believes this to be solely the fault of the masses and not due to her lack of understanding what “appropriate” social behaviour is. And I just find it interesting that she made such a conscious decision to do that because it’s probably one of the leading reasons as to why Wednesday is often identified as autistic. As one of the most damning aspect’s of being autistic is experiencing people quickly deciding they don’t like you and/or that you’re weird after very little interaction and having no idea what you did to cause that reaction.
The scene where Enid leaves their dorm after what happened at the Gates mansion is a really good example of this. Because in Wednesday’s mind her and Enid were good, possibly even becoming close friends. She didn’t initially understand why Enid was leaving and why she was so mad at her. Yet once their argument is over and Enid had left we clearly see her being remorseful over what she did because Enid told her what she did wrong and how that made her feel like Wednesday had betrayed her. And I think that’s why their relationship is so sweet because not only does Enid seem to understand that Wednesday’s brash and morbid nature shouldn’t be taken offensively she also tells her when that attitude (intentional or not) is crossing a line. She makes it clear to Wednesday that what she did was wrong and tells her exactly why that is, not simply reacting negatively and assuming Wednesday’s actions were intentionally made with malicious intensions. Enid accepts Wednesday for who she is while not letting her away with being cruel and manipulative within their friendship and in exchange we see Wednesday begin to accommodate Enid into her life.
It’s not that Wednesday doesn’t want friends. It’s that she’s never had anyone bother to make the effort to understand her. Consequently experiencing sixteen years of people deciding she’s a freak from day one and ultimately concluding that everyone outside of her family’s not worth her time and that she’s better off alone. And I think that’s why I love Wednesday and Enid’s relationship so much. It’s the deeply implied significance of Enid being Wednesday’s first true friend woven throughout the storyline. Enid didn’t only fight the Hyde to save Wednesday she also fought all semester to be able to love her.
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