#and he speaks with mulcahy. oh with mulcahy he talks and talks and talks. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

quordleona03 · 7 months

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Snippet meme

@allcanonisrelative and @impishtubist posted a lovely pair of snippets as an AU to Yes Sir, That's Our Baby, which is of course Hawkeye/BJ babyfic. So I thought I'd share my AU Hawkeye/Mulcahy babyfic. Except, I'm me, so she's not exactly a baby.

This is an AU where Hawkeye was an army doctor drafted in the Vietnam war and Francis was an army chaplain, so they're about twenty years younger than they are in the mainverse.

Hawkeye put the phone down. He looked around the office and the boxes he had barely started to unpack, and closed his eyes, just briefly. Then he punched in their home number.

"Who is it?" Francis said. He sounded pre-occupied and exasperated.

"I have wonderful news," Hawkeye said.

"You're coming home early," Francis said.

"No. I mean, yes," Hawkeye said. "I probably am, but I've still got to talk to at least three people here before I can leave and you'll want me to go to the mall before I get home."

"Why?" Francis said, and then, a moment before Hawkeye said, he got it, from the complicated little noise he made down the phone.

"I'm pregnant," Hawkeye said.

He let himself grin then, as Francis made those noises of surprise, worry, astonishment, panic, and - despite everything - delight.

"You can't be," Francis said. "What - who - ? Why?"

"Caseworker called," Hawkeye said. "Mrs Connolly. Fifteen, troubled, mom died, dad's not in the picture, she's getting into fights at school - "

"She? We're having a girl?"

"Yes," Hawkeye said.

"You need to go to the mall before you come home, we have nothing in the house for a girl - "

"She'll be arriving with a couple of suitcases, caseworker said. Mom died about a month ago. All their things aside from the two cases are in store in Los Angeles. We're getting her because they decided she had to be moved out of the area, into a completely different school district, and they asked around and one of the people they asked was Peg Hunnicutt - "

"Oh," Francis said.

"Yeah, and Peg said, if you want her to have a new start in a good foster home, I know these two guys - "

"Ah," Francis said. In New York City, they had fostered troubled teens over twenty years, mostly boys, though there had been some brother-sister placements. "How long for?"

Hawkeye shrugged. "Depends if dad shows up. If not, and if the placement works out, I guess til she's eighteen. Caseworker said she knew our paperwork wasn't up-to-date for California - " They had only moved here three days ago, and they hadn't been intending to start fostering again " - but she'd rush it and we'd be registered from yesterday by next Monday."

"When is she arriving?" Francis asked.

"Our stork is due - " Hawkeye checked his watch " - in three hours and twenty minutes."

"Oh, Hawkeye - " Francis sounded really exasperated. "Be home in two hours, all right? I'll get her bedroom set up, even if nothing else is ready. Get the basics from the mall, we'll go shopping with her tomorrow."

"Tomorrow is the first day of term, that's why they're rushing it."

"We'll go shopping with her tomorrow after school," Francis said. "Did the caseworker - Mrs Connolly - mention any allergies, any diet issues?"

"Nope."

"Pizza, probably," Francis said. "What's her name?"

"Buffy Summers."

"Buffy?"

"We're in California now."

"Can you - "

"I know what to get," Hawkeye said. "I'll be home in two hours. I love you."

"I love you," Francis said, but he still sounded exasperated. They hung up on each other, and Hawkeye got up to speak to the first of three people he had decided he could not skip speaking to on his first day.

He made three stops at the mall, and was home with an hour to spare. "Or more, if the traffic is bad driving from Los Angeles," Hawkeye noted, kissing Francis.

Their front room had been set up with a sofa and a couple of armchairs, facing their television: some of their books had been unpacked, and boxes stood below part-filled shelves. Their spare room - the girl's room, now - was perfectly in order: bed neatly made with clean plain sheets and pillows and a duvet: chest of drawers by the wall: a clock and a bedside light on the bedside cabinet. Francis had even hung curtains in the windows. Hawkeye handed Francis the bag of things he'd got at CVS, and let Francis deal with that: he hung one set of bath towel, hand towel, and face cloth, and put the other two sets away in the chest of drawers.

"You need to shower and change," Hawkeye said. "You smell like you've been wrestling furniture all day."

Francis glanced at his watch.

"Relax. You have at least half an hour."

"Did you get - " Francis said, sounding pre-occupied.

" - yes, and I can follow a boxed recipe."

Francis stopped, and looked at Hawkeye. "Yes, I know you can," he said, and smiled at Hawkeye. "Thank you."

"I'm so excited I could plotz," Hawkeye said, cheerfully. "But instead, I'm just going to go downstairs and bake brownies." He kissed Francis, and Francis reached up and caught the back of his head and pulled him down and kissed him, and they used up at least five minutes they could not really spare, but Francis was quick in the shower when he wanted to be, and Hawkeye had bought the simplest generic cake mix he could find. The brownies were cooling on a rack, filling the house with a comfortable, homey aroma, and Francis was downstairs, fully-dressed, and filling the coffee maker, when the doorbell rang.

The next half hour was what it always was. The caseworker, Mrs Conolly, had forms to be filled in and signed: she accepted a cup of coffee and a brownie, and so did the girl - Mrs Conolly wouldn't let her leave her sight until both Francis and Hawkeye had filled in the required forms and signed them and provided their ID - and then, she collected the paperwork, and shook hands with each of them, and told the girl she would be back to see her in a few days or you have my number, call me, and left. Hawkeye had gone to show her out: when he came back, Francis and the girl were still sitting either side of the table, each with a cup of coffee in front of them. Neither had drunk very much, and the girl had barely nibbled on the brownie.

"Look," said the girl, "I know the score."

"Is that so?" Hawkeye said.

She had a clear, distinct voice, and sounded very sure of herself. "I can take care of myself. You guys just need to show me where the school is, and I'll be out of your hair most of the day. Anyway, this is just temporary, right?"

"Well," Francis said. "We're very happy to have you here, Miss Summers, however long you stay." He smiled. I'm Francis Mulcahy - you can call me Mr Mulcahy or Francis, whichever you prefer."

"And I'm Doctor Pierce, or Hawkeye."

"Hawkeye?" The girl sounded startled. "Like the - " She made gestures which Hawkeye, who was used to this reaction, understood to be miming a bow-and-arrow. " - from the comics?"

"No," Hawkeye said. "Same spelling, different hero. I'm a doctor - I work at a clinic the other side of the mall from here."

"Can I show you round the house, Miss Summers?" Francis said.

"Buffy," the girl said. She got up. She was eyeing both of them, not exactly warily, but as if she was suddenly less sure of herself. "You guys are gay, right?"

"I'm gay, Francis is delightful," Hawkeye said, solemnly.

She gave him a puzzled look, and Hawkeye smiled at her.

"We've only just moved in ourselves, Buffy," Francis said. "Let me give you the full tour. Hawkeye, could you find those take-out menus?"

#Hawkeye/Mulcahy #hawkeye pierce #francis mulcahy #writing snippet #mash tv #hawkcahy #AU crossover #Mulcahy Monday

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variousqueerthings · 2 years

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okay so another 12 episodes into season 6 and I’ll say a few overall things

1. Margaret this season is glowing! she’s crying! she’s being vulnerable! she’s opening up to Hawkeye especially!!!! she’s got a friend who’s a woman!!!!!!!!!! (did anyone else get a biiit of a lesbian feeling between the two of them? Margaret you’ve changed -- I loved you -- I love you)

And: that double episode where she and Hawkeye are lost in the middle of nowhere and end up presumably having sex -- I feel like the show is predicting all my tastes and needs??? the fact that they do have sex (which I did suspect would happen) and at a time like that where they’re both incredibly scared, and off the back of them leaning emotionally on each other during some incredibly tough times (Hawkeye telling her about Kyung Soon, Margaret telling him about Donald), the fact that Margaret -- being in a very emotionally vulnerable position + always battling against what she wants with what she feels is expected -- leans into the interpretation that it means they’re in love/starting a relationship, the falling out when Hawkeye eventually overcomes the awkwardness and tells her that he didn’t see the situation like that (and neither did she, she’s just following a script), the falling out, and the final scene!!!??? where they talk it out and realize they’re on the same page actually, and genuinely like and respect one another as friends?????? never did I think! it would go down like that!! (I’ve been ruined by all these stories about compulsory romance and sex = romance and the main guy and the main girl get together every time, to think it could be this good!?)

Also what was the intention of the framing when Margaret takes the block of wood out of Hawkeye’s thigh and he’s squirming around, because it sure looks like she’s ******* him (which... also correct and right)

hers and Hawkeye’s friendship has been especially gratifying to watch this season, as I’ve been hoping and waiting for it since the beginning, but I love seeing her open up to others -- last episode her girl friend (girlfriend) Lorraine told her that she ought to trust herself to become friends with her colleagues and she nervously asked BJ and Charles if they’d have coffee with her and of course they accepted, because Margaret is a fucking delight!

2. and then we had a series of episodes which had various degrees of serious, but mainly seemed to give lots of wonderful family dynamics (including the episode Mail Call Three which had two actual “family”s in there!) -- I almost feel too safe, like something terrible is waiting around the corner (oh yeah, the war...) -- but until then we got some wonderful stuff

- the episode where BJ has to call Peggy, just because he wants to know that she still “needs” him at all

- the whole Olympics episode

- Radar feeling strange about his mother dating a new man, and Hawkeye talking about his father (and Radar joking a bit about the idea of their parents getting together, which was such a sibling energy moment)

- Margaret choreographing making sure that Hawkeye and BJ get hosed down + running over Charles’ trumpet! (and everyone cheering her)

- Klinger and Mulcahy going out on a mission to find stolen penicillin

- too many “Potter is dad” moments to count honestly

- Hawkeye and Potter immediately springing to action to help Margaret figure out if she’s pregnant, and on her terms (not making it official)

- and especially Klinger, both with the divorce and talking about how much he loves the 4077 (if not being in Korea) and with the episode where he accidentally throws out Margaret’s ring.

3. speaking of the episode with Margaret’s ring (and Margaret), both me and my partner feel like in this season the airing date order was clearly not completely in tune with some of the development -- especially Margaret who definitely has a “before Comrades in Arms” and “after Comrades in Arms” (heh I just got the joke in the title) feeling to her + the fact that the new surgical clamp they have to travel to show in those episodes apparently doesn’t get invented until three episodes later!

Going to make a note of Margaret progression and rejuggle the season so next time I watch it, I get to feel more of that development!

4. “Temporary Duty” gave us:

- the aforementioned Margaret and Lorraine! the Feelings of it all! Margaret is just life! (do you think they ever... 😳😳😳 👉👈)

- Charles development! He and BJ banding together! For a moment the walls were down! And hopefully a taste of a wonderful future friendship!

- the scene right at the end where Hawkeye returns and is so upset that nobody liked him at the other place, and has a “oh no that’s my insecurities” moment when Charles and BJ joke that they didn’t miss him at all, before Charles hugs him and BJ then practically tackles the both of them to the floor in affection! (screams and cries, my boys!)

#im watching MASH #margaret houlihan #hawkeye pierce #charles winchester #long post #bj hunnicutt #maxwell klinger #sherman potter #father mulcahy #i have replies to some replies #ive just been brrrrrrrr overwhelmed with stuff #this show is like 2/3rds of my sanity right now

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wellntruly · 1 year

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M*A*S*H - Season 5, misc. notes

Public-facing episode guide here, live recording of nonsense backstage philosophizing: well that’s here. Odd way to phrase that (bodes well!)— this one’s mostly just the meta! We got into meta this time.

— �� —

Did they slow down my theme song??

They slowed down my theme song and shoehorned in an extra riff—to fit in William Christopher <3

Ooookay it’s been four years coming that some decent salt-of-the-earth working class private is just like, Doctor Hawkeye, I cannot parse what you are saying. He deserves this and this was so funny.

In Sherm language we don’t say “be careful,” we say “remember, my wife is looking forward to meeting you,” and I think that’s adorable.

I’m becoming such a Klinger girlie. People like being able to sort other people into categories, straight people and queer people alike, and hahah you are just not gonna get that with Corporal Klinger! Bellísimo <3 gender expression is unpindownable. He's a man he's in a dress he's my best friend.

The tone they’re landing on for Margaret, Hawk, and BJ being all, I still think you’re ridiculous and will make fun of you but also I do enjoy palling around with you when you’re like this is just, ideally managed. Guess who directed this one!

Whew okay, pained shouting! We haven’t really done this!

There’s a way Hawkeye talks to BJ when he has his eyes covered and is in muted crisis, which has actually happened twice now, which is how I can say that there’s something in his voice that’s the same every time, and isn’t in his voice any other time, and each time I feel suddenly desperate to physically hide him with my arms for being too exposed. And other absolutely untrammeled sentences I never expected to write about M*A*S*H (1972-1983). (But it's only when he can't seeeee him!)

Klinger chiding “Don’t hit that” after blindfolded Hawkeye walks right into a stove has made me laugh three times, once initially, once on instant replay, and now just thinking about it

I phoned-in my friend the actual eye care professional, by the by, and keratitis of the cornea does indeed usually heal right back up, but would hurt like the dickens while it does. So while it’s not mentioned in the script, feel free, as I have done, to imagine Hawkeye’s on just, so much morphine. It’s actually maybe even less in his performance dopily talking about the rain, than in BJ’s performance watching him dopily talk about the rain, that I could very much see (sorry) to that being the case.

BJ: “Time for beddy-bye.” Hawkeye: “As us butch guys say at the front.” Briefly astral-shifted effect of this almost as powerful as the time my father and I were driving all the way across America one December to move me from New York to Portland, and like two days in he comments during a moment of navigation, that when he was in college, he and his fraternity brothers would always use the direction “go forward” because “no one wanted to be straight,” and that one second before I realized he meant straight in the early 1970s sense of “square” was like falling into another plane.

“Boy, you think the Army would try to fix it so guys that are married with each other could be in the same outfit.” Radar sweetie sometimes I think I might die for you and your jumbled grammar

This posture is so unnecessarily visually compelling

Then just, pardon me, reaching inside BJ’s knee to pull his wheelchair back up to him again… Are we making sure they teach this in schools

Meaninglessly Evocative Tableaus To Make With Your Body. 101.

I did laugh at Colonel Flagg walking in in a deeply embellished and unhinged get-up and Radar just going oh hi Flagg

Klinger’s found another soldier who speaks Arabic—crew

Sidney recognizing that Father Mulcahy is just a fellow therapist—crew

Alan Alda as Sidney Freedman writing on BJ Hunnicutt: “He’s an enigma with size 13 shoes.” [choking slightly] Okay- "In the midst of the most terrific enterprise ever devised to separate a person’s brain from his buns, BJ goes calmly on. I envy his serenity. Although there must be a volcano under there somewhere." Okay !

Radar: “I thought that was p-sgetti.” help me

Hawkeye, drink in hand, watching Klinger spin a new narrative, and turning to Potter to remark in this exact tone, “I like this!” is the most represented I have ever felt in my entire life. Me Watching A Media!!

Just got a “Ja wohl, Herr Leutnant” from Klinger to BJ. I'm very into what these two have going on when they’re in the O.R., incidentally. The way BJ & Klinger flirt has always got this like, regalness to it, and only ever in the midst of surgery.

Have I mentioned how much I love Nurse Kellye? Fucking love Nurse Kellye. She’s been around what, three seasons by now? Hilariously they keep bringing back a few of the same actors as different nurses, but Nurse Kellye is just Nurse Kellye, steadfast. She’s got pigtails right now and is helping BJ on a bucket brigade.

Oh my god…it IS Friday the 13th, as I watch this! Spooky.

The thing about Alda as a director, is that he loves visual bits. Even if they didn’t put the names up front, I swear I’d know. In this scene he’s got a camera set-up arranged so that first he, then Father Mulcahy, have been successively revealed as Potter and Frank move through Potter’s office, right at opportune moments in their dialogue. ME:

Father Mulcahy: “Wondrous is man and mysterious the ways of God. And I would have no one shield my eyes from the glory of His works.” Frank: “What does that mean?” Father Mulcahy: “It means there’s more than one way to skin a spirit. :)” The. Best. Chaplain. Reaction. To. A shamanistic ritual to drive the evil spirits from the camp! And this delivery….William Christopher said Father Mulcahy is going to be a dang ass freak, in exactly his own way <3

How often is BJ tossing things off his cot and pulling a blanket over Hawkeye? [reprise] This is a show about sleeping.

Update: especially this particular episode, which is about Not sleeping!

Two years since he’s seen his dad. For your diaries. Huh, one year that he lived with Trapper…and by Potter’s reckoning all of S4 was only a few months…hang on, was Hawkeye already there as long as maybe eight months on his own before Trapper got there? Oh I love that idea. I realize actually trying to chart the timeline of this 11 season show stuffed into a 3-year war is just gonna go full Jeremy Bearimy, but I’m holding on to this one as one possible emotional truth of it because I like it very much.

Few things can make you more feel like another person is secretly a different species than learning how they fold their socks.

BJ baby you are an enigma in size 13 shoes but I sure do feel like I get a Lot from what I do get!! Honey I’m shouting. Let’s pretend that we’re fighting. :) I’ll grab your arm and pull you around. :)

First time I’ve heard Hawkeye call him Hunnicutt and it does of course feel like he’s just going to be calling him honey, something he completely might do in any circumstance.

My god this is such a perfectly calibrated thing for Hawkeye to get hung up on though, because 100% had it not even occurred to BJ at this point that it would actually bother Hawkeye to be told he hates to lose, while for Hawkeye, who prides himself on his air of cool nonchalance, finding out that people know he *does* hate to lose and is in fact rather high-strung about it (about a lot of things really), is driving him bonkers. He’ll want to insist he doesn’t actually care, but of course, that’s very much caring! He’s stuck!

TIMELOOP KLAXON: Colonel Potter is still counting down the end of his tour as 16 months—we were already at about 16 months this time last season. In one year we have covered: 0 months. Terrific stuff.

Ooo, moving away from Frank means Margaret gets to be less bigoted now! She just “to each their own”ed!

PAUSE. Pause pause pause:

“My wife bottles things up, keeps everything inside. So I get in her way in the kitchen. I keep nudging her, until she gets sore enough to swing at me. Then out it comes. The anger, tears, the problem. Everything.”

So you’re saying BJ is a very emotionally intelligent person, with an innate willingness to step up and trip the release valve for people he cares about who are just spinning in their own caught-up emotions. Wow you don’t say, really? Because that would MAKE ALL THE SENSE IN THE WORLD. GodDAMN that fits, goddamn but he has been doing this to Hawkeye already!!!! BJ, just like, I see the sparks racing along your edges; let me be your grounding wire. And not caring about the snap. Yell.

Hawkeye to BJ: “C’mon, pour your heart out. I’m a doctor, I can fix it.” Me, 1.5 drinks deep in this one: “Oh, Jesus Christ!”

I like when they’ve got their sterile hands held up while referring to a medical text someone is holding open for them.

Hmm. No you know what, I’m gonna do it, I'm gonna look a gift horse in the mouth. [Poster for M*A*S*H Season 5] Here's my review: not gay enough. What made this show so special in its first seasons, was that when characters were making homoerotic quips, those quips were never undercut at all. The joke was actually that every gay comment got a response that took it further. What was fun what was thrilling, what made you laugh and love them, was that they were daring to not back it down, to leave it out there, leave the possibility open to take him up on that, and it was all in keeping with the sort of existential nihilism of the war. Who cares; hold me. Positively counter-cultural.

I don’t want to sound overly alarmed, but we are losing this! They’re still making queer jokes, but now they are taking it back down, and I protest it. Let me give you some examples:

2x17 - You can watch this in gif form, and meanwhile I’ll tell you how this encapsulates exactly what I mean about the way early M*A*S*H was queer: it’s because Henry remarking in response to an ‘one hand washes the other’ comment from Hawkeye, “You fix that sweetheart, and I’ll give you a bath,” a) already feels something pretty special with that 'sweetheart', but b) would on any other show then OR now be followed (leveled out) by Hawkeye turning to Trapper and saying something like “I think he’s been here too long.” But NOT ON M*A*S*H, no here Hawkeye yes-and’s, he plays in the space, creates a whole space; he comes back with: “That part of our relationship is over, Henry.” You see how that’s so different? You see how that’s amazing? How I love that?

And we’re just not doing this so much anymore. Look at these now:

5x05 - Hawkeye: “If the war’s over, meet me under the clock at Grand Central in 10 years. We’ll go dancing.” BJ: “I lead.” Hawkeye: “Then you buy.”

You see how that kinda clips it off, kinda falls back? In earlier seasons that would fall forward, it wouldn’t have this slight check. We'd commit, we'd go one up, “Would you? And dip me?” Remember when Hawkeye used to actually come on to the other men of the 4077? When he would always keep tossing the next move back to their court, like the one time (actually in court) he and BJ did do this? The way he slightly tilts in. The dare. So notable for being the only time in the past two seasons, with anyone, set against any of his dozens of such come-ons to Trapper or, to torment him, Frank.

Another:

5x20 - Alda’s got the typewriter again and his very first line as BJ does push-ups is “Did I ever tell you you look cute with your shirt off?,” but the second line is “No,” and the third is “I think I know why.” No! BJ is supposed to throw back “That’s why I’m doing this,” and then Hawkeye still gets to groan in exasperation, “Sleeeep, I wanna sleep!” but now it's so much better. At the end of this same episode drunken BJ, flush with surgical success, clambers up and slings his arms around him going “Hawkeye Hawkeye Hawkeye!,” and Hawkeye, still checking for hepatitis, peers at him going “Show me your tongue,” so far so good, and BJ goes “My tongue! That’s small potatoes. I’ll show you my butt!” and Hawkeye’s response is: nothing. How! In Season 3 he’d be saying “My mother warned me about fast men,” or “Well it is your finest asset,” anything. Something!

It’s just, the reason why I feel like I can come up with all of these so easily, is that this used to be all the time. I know how I wish these flirty jokes would flow because they did flow that way. And I miss it. C'mon babes, remember who you are. Remember what made you great, what made you special. Lean in.

Potter: “I almost lost Hawkeye today.” Hawkeye: “In a poker game?” Potter: “I’d never throw you into the pot unless I had at least two pair.” Well a) lol, but b) can’t figure it, but this whole episode I’ve been finding the idea that someone could carry Dr. Pierce off for himself captivating and somehow, recognized? This is not like, a thing, I don’t think I’ve ever actually encountered a story with this before, but my mind is like oh yeah, just like in stories with post-apocalyptic doctor bartering, sort of kidnapped around. ?? Where is this coming from. Why am I like oh yeah I’m familiar with this emotional landscape? !? No you’re not! What is this!

I appreciate how much of My Darling Clementine we’re watching. We’re really just watching a movie together! You know I haven’t actually seen a John Ford film before? Horizon looks nice .. :)

Hawkeye taking up knitting has been really good for me. He’s currently using BJ to wind a skein of yarn.

GOD I love it when they let Loretta Swit play drunk. Best drunk actor on this show by 500 miles. And this show has a lot of drunk actors.

Oh so now this season has lasted 8 months, you think? It has Not…you all are stuck here <3

— — —

Season Viewguides

These

#M*A*S*H #M*A*S*H hours #Misc. MASH #Tarra takes notes

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symphonyincoordination · 11 months

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Hello!! Curious what your thoughts are about mail call 3?

That’s nice of you to be interested, thank you 😊 I don’t suppose they’re terribly hot takes or anything, but here you go. Since I have perpetual Klinger brain they all revolve around him I’m afraid. Essentially, this episode isn’t particularly kind to him but doesn’t seem to realise it.

It doesn’t bother that nobody believes Laverne is leaving him at first, because it true that isn’t out of line with his previous get-out attempts. But then when he completely goes to pieces at the movie and still most people…don’t seem that bothered? If um. If my friend stripped off at the cinema I’d probably at least check with them I reckon. He does get some concern from Colonel Potter and Father Mulcahy, and a little from Radar when he goes AWOL. But none of the other characters take any interest in his distress, at least as far as we see.

Now, OK, they the have their own storylines going on. But the conclusion of the episode presents things as though the 4077 helped Klinger through getting dumped and he’s happy that he has them? The family concept is specifically invoked twice, once by Radar and once by Klinger himself. He says he may not have a family anymore in Toledo but at least he has his Mash family. Which, sweetie no, famously you have a very large family at home! Who are always shown to be very supportive!

No one actually helped him through his personal crisis. He left camp still completely upset, and calmed himself down by entirely by himself. Everyone is happy to have fun with him once he’s managed to do that, but at his lowest point he’s rather left alone. And I think this episode is possibly the most shaken we ever see him (I’m sort of discounting that time he tried to kill Frank with a grenade because although it is strictly speaking canonical, it’s only his second appearance and totally out if step with how he’s portrayed in every other episode, so I feel it’s a case of them to having the character figured out yet). There may be other examples that I can’t think of, but it’s definitely up there. So it’s especially sad to me that they aren’t there for him.

It’s also just occurred to me that his getting divorced doesn’t…really go anywhere to the best of my recollection. I know it does come up again. But compare it with Margaret’s divorce, which is treated as an ongoing character arc, as much as that happened in sitcoms of that era. Which I love for her! But Klinger suffers a huge betrayal and heartbreak, and the finale of Mail Call Three treats as though it’s all resolved now, he’s fine now because he has his found family to help him through. Only they didn’t.

To be clear, I don’t mind characters being jerks to each other! However the disconnect between what the narrative is telling me happened vs what actually was shown on screen is frustrating to me. There’s also, you know, that general trend of Klinger being treated poorly especially as the series goes on. And I don’t like it because!! He’s great! I love him a whole lot! 🥰 So maybe I’m biased, but everyone should have been nicer to him. Or at least, fine, don’t have the characters be nice to him but don’t pretend that they were!

Anyway. I do like the scene between Hawkeye and Radar. It’s cute, they’re cute. As an aside, I like that Radar talks about setting up Daniel Pierce with his mum. It reminds me of how he’s keen to establish a relationship between his family and the Winchesters in The Party. People talk a lot about whether characters would stay in touch after the war. Things like that make me think Radar would make an effort to keep in touch with people, especially because we do see him write to the 4077 at least once I can think of. I also like Radar and Klinger’s interaction at the beginning, when he’s trying to get his letter. More cute!

Oh and one thing I do like is the way they tie Klinger’s mood to his clothes. He starts off in a dress, then literally tears it off when he reaches his breaking point. He stays in uniform when he’s at his lowest. And then once he starts feeling happier he’s back to dressing his best 💖 I think that’s interesting, plus extremely relatable!

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morewyckedthanyou · 2 years

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Ooh, how about M*A*S*H for the ship thing? That should be interesting. 💖

!!! Thanks for asking! I was actually kinda hoping I would get a Mash ask from someone so really glad that you delivered! 😘

put a fandom in my ask and i’ll answer:

otp I love to suffer and have next to no content to speak of so obviously my answer is Hawkcahy. I just think Hawkeye and Mulcahy could work in a weird way ok. I need Mulcahy to go to Maine.

favourite canon pairing Oh god, idk? Colonel Potter and his wife Mildred maybe? I know we just hear about her when Potter talks about her, but there's really something that draws me in when it comes to their relationship and how much Potter seems to care for her, even though they get to see each other so little while he's always away from home on army business.

worst pairing ever Frank and Margaret. I mean, in the first seasons they make the perfect antagonistic duo but Frank is so terrible in every way I feel sorry for everyone having to spend too much time around him. Margaret finally dumping Frank's sorry ass was the best thing ever happening to her.

guilty pleasure pairing I don't think I have one? Trapper/Hawkeye maybe started as one, as I didn't really originally ship them like that very seriously, but these days there's no guilt involved, lol.

a pairing you want to see more Obviously my OTP but fat chance - unless I write some myself. 😂

that pairing everyone likes but you’re like “lol no” BJ/Hawkeye. I just really can't get into this pairing. I really can't. I wanted to like them - but it never happened.

favorite non-romantic pair I think either the Klinger and Mulcahy friendship or the kind of a father/son dynamic between Henry and Radar. <3 But I also really love how Hawkeye and Margaret become friends in the end when they start off as enemies.

#shipping asks #answers #catzy88

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nimuetheseawitch · 2 years

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001. MASH. GIVE ME ALL THE DETAILS.

002. HAWK AND BEEJ, OBVIOUSLY

003. RADAR O'REILLY

Sorry I left this in my ask box so long. Here we go again :)

001 | MASH

Favorite character: I'm on such a Hawkeye kick right now. I just love the way he loves: so fully and completely and sometimes excessively. He loves passionately and he loves passion. He gives and gives and gives of himself and has a surprisingly large capacity for love. And he's whiny and annoying and full of faults and simultaneously expects everyone to love him and reject him at the same time. He is full of contradictions. He is a bisexual folding chair of a man.

Least Favorite character: Zale. He gets very little character except to be antagonistic towards Klinger. What does he even do?

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): inspired by @thebreakfastgenie, one of my new favorite non-canon ships is Hawkeye/being okay. Klinger/Soon Lee, Charles/Donna, Hawkeye/BJ/Peg (OT3), and Hawkeye/almost everyone. I want him to have slept with pretty much everyone in camp and just be a great friend to everyone later. It's practically canon, but I want to open it up to all genders.

Character I find most attractive: Margaret in that halter top...

Character I would marry: I think I constantly change my mind on this, but today I would marry Bigelow.

Character I would be best friends with: Mulcahy. I dunno, today I'm really feeling like talking about religion with someone, and he'd be up for all my weird thoughts on it.

a random thought: my mind is currently stuck on all the impressions they do of Mulcahy...

An unpopular opinion: Charles is right - Mahler is good. And he wasn't playing Mahler's 5th loud enough. That opening should be eerily quiet, one lone trumpet into the void, and then a cascade of sound. Performing that symphony so many times is probably a big contributor to my tinnitus.

My Canon OTP: Klinger/Soon-Lee. It was short but oh so sweet. They didn't know each other for long, but the contrast was incredible. The way she was fighting against the entire concept of the army and Klinger was shaken out of his complacence to help her, and then she cares too much about him and leaves him behind but he cares too much about her and follows her closer to the front. And how she wanted to see him in a dress. And they look so damn happy. And they're gonna get three weddings: MASH, Korean, and Lebanese.

My Non-canon OTP: Hawkeye/BJ. I feel a little disappointed in myself, but I have to be honest. It's popular because it's good. They're a hot mess, and I love them for it. I also wanna fix it. And make it worse. And I'm a sucker for a mustache and suspenders (and so is Hawkeye).

Most Badass Character: Klinger. Like Ginger Rogers, he did everything his fellows did, but in heels (and probably backwards sometimes). And he can read, write, and speak in at least two languages with vastly different alphabets. He's brilliant and gorgeous and has an excellent eye for style.

Most Epic Villain: The constant trauma of war dredging up the traumas of their childhoods. I posted recently about this, and it's constantly on my mind. The war affects them all in different, unique ways. Hawkeye and his reversion to childhood and his pattern of repressing traumatic events, Charles and his obsession with what it feels like to die, BJ's attempts to control his life at home, Frank's clinging to Margaret and to "patriotism," and so much more. Their coping mechanisms often hurt them as much as they help, and it's all kinds of fucked up. And the Army preys on it.

Pairing I am not a fan of: Frank/Margaret. I mean, I love their dynamic, and it's a really interesting part of the show, but she has always deserved more. And Frank brings out the worst in her. Her character growth really takes off once she leaves him.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): POC characters. Ginger and Oliver had a few excellent bits and then just disappeared from the show. Captain Sam Pak was amazing and seemed like he would be a recurring character, but we only saw him a few times. It took them until season 11 to give Kellye an episode. When Klinger decorates, they spew racist garbage and laugh at him.

Favourite Friendship: I'm really into Hawkeye and Margaret right now. They're not always close, but she is able to take him down a peg when she needs it, and she has a huge capacity for kindness. She loves as hard as Hawkeye, but she shows it differently. They take a while to find their groove, but once they do, they're amazing.

Character I most identify with: Hawkeye. I think we're really supposed to identify with him, and I'm pretty sure my brain is cherry-picking bits of his character to make it work, but I just feel connected with him on some fundamental (and probably really fucked up level).

Character I wish I could be: Absolutely none of them. The 50s were bad for people like me, and a war is a terrible place. And they're all incredibly fucked up. I admire many of them, but I never want to have to be that strong.

002 | Hawkeye/BJ

When I started shipping them: subconsciously forever. More actively, probably last September/October during my 2021 rewatch. I'd thought it before (I've been rewatching it frequently since 2012), but it started rotting my brain around "Rudyard Kipling" this time around, and it brought me to MASHblr.

My thoughts: I wish they could make each other happy. I want to torture them, I want to see them in every imaginable scenario, I want to see them together, I want to see them yearning and apart, and I just want more of their absurdity.

What makes me happy about them: the way they laugh at each other's stupid jokes.

What makes me sad about them: they just don't seem like they'll ever be able to make it work.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: Peg erasure. And bi erasure. I have read fic that convinces me of the comphet of it all for BJ, but he does love Peg, and that needs to be handled well. And Hawkeye is bisexual (or pansexual) and no one can convince me otherwise.

Things I look for in fanfic: Gotta have some angsty BJ who is struggling to process feelings. It's all about the characters for me, so I'm looking for interpretations that align nicely with mine, or do something new and interesting.

My wishlist: asdflsdkjf, I don't know. I want them to be happy, I want them to be sad, I want them to be a complete mess. But recently I really wanted more modern hospital AUs.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: BJ with Peg or possibly fucking up his entire life and ending up alone and regretful (can you tell I love him?). Hawkeye with someone new, not anyone from MASH. Or maybe with Trapper (Trapper's got some things to answer for too, but there have been some excellent versions of them getting together after the war).

My happily ever after for them: In a cute Victorian in San Francisco that's technically split into two apartments (for propriety), with Erin every other week (the rest of the time she's with Peg and her wife). OR neighboring houses/a duplex with matching lavender marriages. BJ working on a motorcycle while Hawkeye knits and talks. Lying on the couch/bed, Hawkeye somehow comfortable while awkwardly wrapped around or on BJ, who is sitting like a normal person but absentmindedly stroking whatever part of Hawkeye is closest while they read medical journals or do chartwork. Domestic bliss. Reading glasses when they get older. Maybe Peg takes Waggles and BJ and Hawkeye get two cats. Or they keep Waggles and get two kittens who annoy the heck out of him lovingly as he ages. Umm. I uh, maybe need to go write some fic now. About Waggles and Marlene (Dietrich) and Edith (Piaf), their cats. brb.

003 | Radar O'Reilly

How I feel about this character: I have complex feelings about him. How many times does he lose his innocence/possibly his virginity? I was tired of that plotline the first time. But I love the weirdness of his psychic abilities (when he responds to things Potter is writing/thinking!) and how he is sometimes a vegetarian? He's weird and wonderful.

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: I dunno. I actually really like that one girl he meets at the airport near the end of his run. And there was at least one fic I read that implied that he ended up with Park Sung, which I love.

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: Henry. I don't think I can say more without crying.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I don't know if this is unpopular, but Radar was wrong about how he got mad at Hawkeye. I kinda hated his hero worship of Hawkeye.

One thing I wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: I wish they had let him grow up a little better. They kept rewinding him to make him so naïve, and I wish he'd had the chance to grow a bit more as a person.

Favorite friendship for this character: Klinger. I wanted more of whatever was happening with the practice proposal that one time.

My crossover ship: I just had the idea that he meets Shawn from Psych, and I don't know what's going to happen, but it sounds fun.

#asked and answered #mash #hawkeye x bj #hunnihawk #radar o'reilly

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blue-ravens · 2 years

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Thoughts on the life you save maybe?

oh FUCK okay. that gifset earlier really unleashed more shrimp emotions and you're about to get them. and i'm going to warn you now the second i get that script in the post i'm going to be obnoxiously unstoppable.

when you have a character like charles in this show, that more or less served as the foil to the main character, that was the b plot antagonist, the character that lived to be brought down a few pegs for comedic effect, and then you turn around and give him character beats like this episode, it's a risky bet. his arc over the last six seasons could have paralleled that of frank in the first five, little depth, the punching bag, the personification of what the show was pointing and laughing at.

but

somewhere along the line you start getting little tiny glimpses at the man behind the curtain. before you've even realised it, suddenly he's a little more... human. and the thing about that is, we as the audience seem to be the only ones who get to see that. which i think is a great writing choice (if it were ever deliberate), because it really does speak to how aloof and emotionally distanced and separate in most senses he is as a character to the rest of them. the whole thing with the accent just cements it, that was an insane acting choice that didn't have to be made but *was*. so up until this point you get teeny tiny little hints about who he really is as a person compared to the performances he puts on for everyone else, and oh my god he's grown on you, right? by this point in the showmhe's so much more than the insufferable asshole that arrived in s6.

(going to put the rest under a cut cos this just went places)

and in this ep.... so much of it happens in front of us and no one else. when he finds the bullet holes in his cap, no one else in the room notices. the conversation with the soldier, bj DOES notice this but he catches only part of it and then proceeds to yell at him for being ghoulish later on. margaret can see something's wrong and attempts to reach out but ends up yelling at him for fidgeting with the cap he won't stop carrying around. potter all but dismisses it. i think it was said in another post that the choices of who interacted with him was very pointed and deliberate. not having hawkeye or mulcahy (no one mentioned sidney the entire episode which i feel is seriously telling) try was something i didn't realise until then, because that, narratively, would have pointed the episode in the same direction as many of the episodes with a similar theme would have gone, and for charles that would not have worked.

the part that sticks out at me, though, is the monologue with the jeep. rizzo being the silent observer while pulling the thing apart while charles sits in it, cap in hand, talking about death and being unable to put people back together like a jeep, and you have to just think that if it were you hearing those things being said, what the hell would you do. someone said the words passively suicidal, and i think that's the perfect way to describe it. like, what he says to potter on the phone, would that not concern you to a degree that something is seriously wrong? would that be so easy to dismiss and let run it's course? and i've said so before, but it'd be interesting to know what actually happened after that phone call, and what happened after he left the aid station, and what happened after and after and after but we don't get that. the story ends and that's really how it goes. it's clear that IF sidney was brought up that there'd be little chance charles would be willing to sit down and have that resolution, because we know from earlier there's a lot of trauma for him concerning psychiatry from a young age. and AGAIN that's a thing only WE know. and while it's not stated clearly the two things (the loss of his brother, being sent to a whole chorus line of psychiatrists at the age of 8, and this, i suppose you can say, relapse) are inextricably linked.

and it's never addressed again!

i can't stop thinking about how it's never brought up again. it ends, and that's where it ends. and if there's one thing about this show, it's that trauma never ends, it's always present, like a secondary character. and what i think stands out MOST is that he's the only one carrying it. most of everything they go through is shared weight between them all, but i guess with him coming from a place where burdens and deep dark secrets are carried alone without complaint or protest that that wasn't ever going to change overnight. and the the show must go on, same as it ever was. the closing shot of the hat being left at the aid station is some kind of closure for the episode itself, but we all know it's really not.

(i think i'd have to veer off a sec and make a comparison with what happens in gf&a, because it's the breakdown you do not see coming. the storyline is so subtly paralleled (see also 'dreams', but that's another essay entirely) with that of hawkeye's. in hawk's case it's the one you see coming a mile away. it's outward, it's dramatic, it's very public and everyone stops what they're doing and steps in in their own way. in charles' case... it sneaks up on you. you're distracted, and it takes you by surprise. and you're the only one who sees it. kellye was the only one present when he finds out about the musicians, but after that, nothing more is said by anyone else. the fact he stands up in front of everyone at the farewell dinner and says what he says, and no one even remarks on it. he has never told anything so personal and painful to that many people before. that was the saddest part of the whole episode for me, it really was. it was as if his continual decision to remain detached and removed from everyone paid off in the worst way possible, no one could see past the polished exterior he fought so hard to present at all times to notice the broken, flawed and the very human person who needed so much help behind it.)

there really wasn't much actually going on in the episode itself but it added so much to literally everything we really knew about his character. we know he lost a brother as a child. we know that he's so very close to and so VERY protective of his younger sister, we know that he's so very concerned with how he's perceived and living up to every insane and impossible expectation put upon him and worrying about falling short and being less than perfect at every turn. we know how hard it will be for him to actually come to terms and properly deal with what happened to him before and what's currently happening to him. we know how isolated and remote his childhood was. WE know this. but no one else does. and how it ends... he knows NOW what he's going back to. he does, and we do. the world's a beast of a burden and all those little things sprinkled here and there throughout the show, it adds up, and this episode, i think, just gives us all some indication how heavy that burden is.

i suppose you can say, this episode was a risk that paid off in so many ways. it was deliciously acted, written, and directed, and every second of it was utterly compelling. it wasn't an attempt to make him pitiable, it just really brings into focus how much of a three dimensional and more real character he grew to be.

#oh god oh boy i hope that makes some sense i just.... started typing and saying whatever and istg it sounded coherent in my head #there are more thoughts istg but this is basically the tl;dr (lmao) version #thank you for the ask!! i don't think i've written that much since my clinical biochem final oops #blue's post #mash #ask

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make-me-imagine · 4 years

Text

🍫13 Days of Halloween: Day 6

Prompts: “Where is all the Halloween candy?” “I don’t know” “Y/n”

((Prompt changed slightly to match characterization))

Requested by: Anonymous

Pairing: Reader x M*A*S*H Unit (Platonic)

Gender: Neutral Triggers: None

Words: 1,585 Genre: Humor; Hijinks

Note: Thank you for requesting M*A*S*H! I hope I did it justice~ The time-line might not match up, but whatever.

You sat down with a sigh as Hawkeye and B.J. fixed themselves a drink, Radar scribbled on his notepad, while Potter sat nearby tapping his finger against his chin.

“So after post op, we’ll invite the nearby villagers, hand out a bunch of candy to the kiddies, and then we’ll have ourselves a nice party” Potter recited as Radar nodded along.

“Sounds like a pretty good plan” you replied “How does Frank feel about it?”

“He doesn’t know yet” Hawkeye said, coming to sit next to you “We don’t think it’s necessary to tell his highness, he’ll complain about it either way”

“Who knows, maybe he’ll think it’s a grand idea” B.J. suggested as he sat on his own cot.

“It’s Frank, B.J., his grand idea of a Halloween party would include everyone dressed in their fatigues dancing 6-feet apart to the tune of the star spangled banner.”

You smiled at Hawkeyes comment as he turned to you “So Y/n, have you decided what you’re going to wear?”

You shrugged “Probably something in a khaki color” you tugged on your pants as you spoke, knowing you had nothing to really wear.

“Oh come on, you gotta dress up, we are!” B.J. said

“I’d love to dress up Beej but I have nothing to wear, I ordered a costume but it never came, I asked Klinger but he’s already given half of his clothes to the rest of the camp to wear.”

Hawkeye patted your leg, leaving his hand on your knee “We’ll find something.”

“I don’t know if I’d want to wear something you’d suggest” you replied with a note of suspicion.

Hawkeye gave you an offended look “I have great taste in clothes!”

“You’re idea for a costume would be my birthday suit.”

“Oh, now that is an idea” he replied with a smirk, making you roll your eyes.

“Uh, Sir” Radar spoke up

“Yes Radar.” Potter asked

“There is just one problem with all of this”

“What’s that Radar? You’re costume come in the wrong size?” B.J. quipped.

“Huh? Oh, no it's fine, well actually it is a little big, but that’s not it, I just, uh but the requisition order for Halloween candy never came in. We’ve got some, but not enough for all the kids and for our party”

You frowned at the news “And everyone donated money and or candy already?”

“Yep, I mean everyone but Major Burns, but that’s because he still doesn’t know about the party”

You, Hawk and B.J. all exchanged knowing looks. Just as you did Frank came bumbling into the swamp, large package in hand “What’s that Frank?” Hawkeye asked.

“None of your beeswax!” Frank yelled aggressively, turning, he sees Potter “Oh, Colonel, hello”

You chuckled quietly at his sudden change in demeanor as he set down the package with a thud. “What’s in the box Burns?” Potter asked repeating Hawkeyes question.

“Oh. Uh, just a package from home” he answered as he began to open the package.

“That’s nice. Well, in other news, Frank, we’re thinking of throwing a little soiree for Halloween, you got any candy you can donate, or money so we can buy some?” Potter asked.

“A soiree? Sir that’s highly un-military” you and the others rolled your eyes as he began “And to answer your question, no, I don’t have any candy to donate, and I wont donate any money for your party” just as he answered, he opened the box, which was chock full of various candy bars and other bags of Halloween candy.

You and the others stood and hovered as you pointed at the box “Now you do!”

“What?! No, this is from my family, you can’t have it!”

“Oh come on Frank” Hawkeye began “We don’t want it all, just donate some! There’s no way you can eat all that yourself!”

“Just watch me!” Frank yelled as he stood, box in hand as he exited the swamp, dropping a couple pieces of candy on the way, which Radar scooped up.

You and the others exchanged annoyed looks as you watched Frank run across the courtyard, clearly towards Margaret’s quarters. “Oh, we’ll get that candy Frank” Hawkeye muttered quietly, so only you and B.J. could hear.

After a few failed attempts at retrieving the candy from Frank, Hawkeye and B.J. were about to give up, but tried one more time the day of the party as they cornered Frank in post-op “Where’s the candy Frank?” Hawkeye asked.

“We just want some, for the kids Frank, think of the kids!” B.J. cut in.

“I don’t care, they’re not my kids! It doesn’t matter anyway, I ate it all” Frank said with a smug look on his face.

Hawkeye scoffed “Frank if you ate all that candy then you’d be comatose.”

Frank scowled at Hawkeye as he turned to leave, Hawkeye and B.J. shared an exasperated look as they followed him out. Looking around, they see the nearby locals arriving, kids excited for having been told they’d be given candy.

“Frank, what can we do for you to to grow a heart and donate some of that candy?” B.J. asked.

Frank turned, seeming to think it over “You can’t make any jokes at me for the next month! And you must act accordingly in my presence, salutes and all!”

Hawkeye and B.J. shared a look of disdain “Fine, fine! Just show us the candy Frank” B.J. muttered out

Frank smirked at them as he turned, leading them towards Margaret's tent, where he had been hiding the candy. You had been walking across the camp as came across them “What’s up guys?”

“Frank agreed to give us some of the candy”

“Oh, is that so?” you asked, something in your voice that made B.J. and Hawkeye hesitate, but continued to follow Frank as you tagged along.

Entering into the tent, Frank opened up the closet pulling out the box. As he opened it, the three of you stood behind him watching. Hawkeye glanced at you, you met his eyes for a moment and smirked, making him curious.

“Hey!” Frank called, earning all of your attention.

He dumped out the box, and all that fell out were some cans of corn and some loose pieces of candy. “He really did eat it all” B.J. muttered in disbelief.

“Or maybe Margarete had a midnight craving” Hawkeye quipped before looking down at Frank “Where’s the candy Frank?” he asked, clearly frustrated.

“How am I supposed to know, it was in here earlier!”

“Maybe the candy-man took it” you joked, clearly not bothered by the missing candy.

Hawkeye and B.J. looked at you, gathering you had something to do with it. And so did Frank. Standing, he eyed you “Where is the Halloween candy?”

You looked at him, feigning offense while shrugging “I don’t know”

“Captain L/n” Frank began, pointing his finger at you, stopping only when the sudden sound of happy yelling children distracted you.

Frank walked away, looking out of the tent, seeing a large group of kids jumping around as Father Mulcahy and a few nurses began handing out candy. Frank squinted as he looked closer “Hey! That’s my candy!”

As this was happening Hawkeye and B.J. looked back at you, amusement on their faces, knowing you had to be the one to do this. You looked at them, winking as they laughed out loud.

Frank turned in anger, pointing his finger at all of you “I know you did this, you stole from me. After I get back my candy, I- I’ll, I’ll have you all on report!”

“Don’t tell me you’re gonna go take your candy back from those kids Frank?!” B.J. asked incredulously.

“I know you have stooped low before Frank but don’t tell me you’d actually take candy from a baby?” Hawkeye asked.

Frank opened his mouth to speak but stopped, turning and looking at the kids and then turning back “Well, why shouldn’t I? It’s my candy!”

You all rolled your eyes, as Margaret jogged up, “Oh, Major Burns you are so kind!”

“Oh, uh, thank you Margar- Uh I mean Major Houlihan, but uh, what are you talking about?”

“Well, Captain L/n told me you had donated all that candy, and now look at all the kids they’re having so much fun!” she spoke with a wide smile.

Frank, Hawk and B.J. all turned to look at you as you stared at Frank with a blank face, hands in your pockets “Frank certainly is a kind and generous man isn’t he?” you asked, no emotion in your voice.

“Oh he really is!” Margaret said as he smiled widely at Frank.

Frank hesitated, looking between you and Margaret “Oh, well, we do what we can Major” he feigned, taking the credit as you internally rolled your eyes.

Margaret suddenly pulled Frank away and towards the group of kids. Feeling pressure on both your shoulders, you look back and forth seeing both Hawkeye and B.J. resting their arms on your shoulder “Here we were, threatening him to give us the candy, and you swept in like a thief in the night” B.J. commented, still amused.

“Well now that that’s over” Hawkeye paused looking down at you with a smile “I’ve got a costume for you I think you’ll like” he smirked

“Oh no” you muttered.

Hawkeye’s smirk only grew as he and B.J. shared a knowing look “Oh, yes”. Hawkeye looped his arm through yours as he began to drag you towards the Swamp, B.J. following behind.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Again, this was my first time writing for M*A*S*H, so I’m not sure if I did it justice lol, but I hoped you like it anyways. And please request more M*A*S*H in the future! I did enjoy writing for it and the characters!!

Please consider reblogging this, as this is a very small fandom, so reblogging it would be one of the best ways to spread it to other MASH lovers :)

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lesbianmulcahy · 3 years

Note

top 5 mulcahy moments of course

😭😭💞 thank you!! these change around A LOT depending what episodes I've recently watched but right now uh I'll say these. The first one is going to be normal:

1. Mulcahy and Sidney in War Of Nerves... I love the potential of that dynamic so much, and the like... gentleness of that scene is just so good... Healer of mind healer of soul it makes me go insane stupid AND crazy

Okay the rest are going to be short scenes that make you see that I am actually an insane person but

2. Mulcahy's first time filling in for a nurse in Carry On Hawkeye. I don't know, something about his character that makes me obsess over him is how willing he is to take on responsibility, and how much he wants to do good and please others. Him asking Hawkeye if he did good... like he tries his best even when he is completely out of his element! Get this man enrolled into a medical school! We recently watched There's Nothing Like A Nurse, and there's a really similar scene in that, where him trying his best (even if it's not that great) is contrasted with Radar and Klinger kinda... not trying that hard. Or maybe that's nlt the rightbword but like. Yeah

2. Mulcahy wrestling Frank out of the O.R. in The Kids. I love it when things get hectic at the 4077th and the gay priest gets mean <3 It's not often he gets to really show how much he dislikes Frank Burns, so I cherish every moment I get

(Speaking of being mean. Him going "oh our newest arrival, major Winchester. Something should say something nice about him...... uh...." like sndnsng the idea that he didn't think anyone would say anything nice about Winchester, and then not being able to come up with anything... Get his ass)

3. His and Hawkeye's moment in Hepatitis... Or all of his moments in Hepatitis actually (YES i know i love the wrong part of the episode aknflsg yes Mulcahy goggles always on). I think the scene where Potter and BJ notice he's looking sick is very sweet... And then the scene with him and Hawkeye just makes me lose my mind. Like how he can not stop working cause what if he's not there and something terrible happens? (what if he's not there and something terrible DOESN'T happen? What if he's here for no reason?) anyways. insane.

4. The ending to Captains Outrageous when Potter pulls him from the helicopter and says he's going to give him a stern talking to (affectionate). Argh I would like to see it! I am obsessed with the potential of their dynamic, like how they both have to keep a bit of a distance to the other people at the camp in order to keep up their roles... Like Potter's paternal thing is so good and specific to each character's needs, and I think there is something very special with his and Mulcahy's dynamic that I just genuinely love

5. All jokes aside, his scene with Klinger in Army-Navy Game! The recognition of self through the other is just so... Like yeah their dynamic isn't at it's full potential in that episode yet, but I feel like it really starts up something. Klinger wanting himself to be seen and Mulcahy seeing him... I say that one just to keep myself from listing all the other Mulcahy&Klinger scenes, like Mulcahy asking Trapper and Hawkeye to compliment Klinger's gloves, or Mulcahy telling Potter off when he has too high expectations for Klinger in Period Of Adjustment or when he and Klinger drive Soon Lee to the refugee center without really explaining anything to Potter or him playing music while Klinger sits on thr piano or or or...

#IM SORRY I WISH I COULD MAKE SENSE #and im sorry this took so long I keep rewriting it sknfksbg #there are just so many scenes... like do not get me started on yalu brick road #and i tried to keep away from dear sis too cause its just. that whole episode. and augh when bj tries to keep him from giving last rites..#..in death takes a holiday... i do link that in my head to when he calls himself a vulture to hawkeye #ANYWAYS IM GONNA STOP NOW THANKS GRAHAM SORRY FOR BEING INSANE #ilyyy!!#ask

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mulcahy4077 · 3 years

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There was a swift knock on the door before it swung open to admit Colonel Blake and the camp’s chaplain, now only recognizable by the crosses on his lapels. The priest’s eyes immediately went to Jack’s and he gave a warm smile as Henry spoke. “Captain Peterson, I thought I’d come by and make sure you were getting settled in alright. This is our Catholic chaplain, Father Mulcahy. His tent is just right across the way from here on the end if you have matters of a spiritual nature. My tent is next to the main office, you can’t miss it. You’ll be taking over Major Burns’ shift, but when we’ve got days like this…well, let’s just say you’ll have more work than you can ask for.”

“Or want.” Trapper added.

“Care for a drink, Henry?” Hawkeye asked as he tinkered with the still.

“Oh, no, I’ve got…work to do.”

“Mmhm.” Duke muttered knowingly behind the rim of his glass. Henry cast a quick glare in his direction.

“Anyhow, if you’ve got any questions, feel free to ask. You’ve met Vollmer, of course. Radar O’Reilly is my company clerk, you’ll get to know him quick enough.”

“Where is Radar?” Hawkeye asked, having just realized he hadn’t seen the boy all day.

“I sent him up to Seoul to pick up a package from HQ. I didn’t want to take a chance of it getting lost in a supply raid.”

“But you’ll take the chance of it getting kifed off one lone kid in a jeep in the middle of a warzone. Good thinking, Henry.”

“Can it, Pierce. “ Blake groused. “If anyone needs me, I’ll be in my tent.”

The chaplain stepped aside to let the colonel out and Hawkeye turned his attention on him. “How’s about you, Dago? Care to join us?”

“Oh, sure. But just a taste, please. I’m praying later.”

The three other men laughed gently as if the chaplain had been kidding and Jack watched the man sit on the edge of Hawkeye’s bunk next to the surgeon, who poured him a drink and passed it over. Dago Red, Jacked noted, was shorter than himself, probably standing somewhere around 5’10, maybe 5’11, and lean. He had thick reddish brown hair that seemed to naturally part just shy of his right temple and toppled over just above his brow. He was a moderately handsome man, Jack thought, and had a gentle, approachable air about him. His olive drab fatigues seemed a size too large on his frame, and Jack noticed that the priest had either intentionally or unintentionally trapped a section of the fine-link chain bearing his cross behind one his shirt buttons.

“I’m glad to see you survived your first day,” the chaplain was saying, drawing Jack’s gaze up from the middle of the man’s torso. “I don’t think anyone ever appreciates the phrase ‘thrown to the wolves’ until they’ve had a run in the OR here.”

“Amen.” Duke asserted from his bunk, lifting his glass towards the priest.

“I’m just glad you said this isn’t an everyday thing,” Jack said with a soft smile.

“Nah,” Duke chimed in again. “If it was, we’d all be buckin’ for a Section 8.”

“So, Father—”

“Call him Dago,” Hawkeye interrupted. “The rest of us do. I think he prefers it.”

“I do not prefer it,” Dago argued evenly, his gaze tracking the other man as Hawkeye sat next to him on his bunk. “I’ve simply become accustomed to it. And it’s fewer syllables.”

Hawkeye grinned at him.

“Where did you come up with the nickname?” Jack asked.

“Oh,” Mulcahy gave a short laugh, then indicated his head in the direction of the three other doctors. “These yucks christened me ‘Dago Red’ in appreciation of my attempt to befriend them.”

“How’s that?”

“Dago was here before any of us,” Trapper supplied, eating an olive. “Anytime someone new comes along, he makes it his business to get to know them.”

“Yeah, so watch out. He’s actually got an ulterior motive for sitting here with us now.” Hawkeye warned.

“That’s not true,” Dago argued again. “I enjoy your company...usually.”

Hawkeye snorted a laugh, but waved him off as he continued Trapper’s tale. “When Duke and I first got here, we kind of snubbed Dago a bit because I’m not religious in any sense of the word and Duke’s not a fan of…”

“Bead jigglers.” Duke supplied as Hawkeye struggled for a polite description of Catholics.

“Yeah, that... Long story short, the three of us never really had much need to speak since he knew where we stood religiously—”

“You intimidated me,” Dago admitted, looking at Hawkeye as he told the tale. “I thought at the very least we could be friendly, but you two were just plain cruel at times!”

“Which we’ve since apologized for,” Hawkeye pointed out in a tone that suggested they’d had this conversation before. Jack found himself wondering how the doctors had been cruel to the priest, but continued to listen as Dago picked up the story.

“It wasn’t until shortly after Trapper’s arrival that Hawkeye lost his first patient. We’d lost boys before, but he’d never been the one working on them. The loss really hit him hard, and that’s when I decided that I had to do everything in my power as chaplain to offer some sort of comfort to him.”

“I remember when you came in here asking if there was anything you could do; Hawkeye took one look at you and told you that unless you had a bottle of whiskey, to get the hell out and don’t let the door hit you in the ass.” Trapper reflected, laughing. “We didn’t think you’d actually come back.”

“Yes, well, never underestimate a priest on a mission.” Dago replied. “I didn’t have any whiskey, but I did have some cognac that had been given to me, so I got it from my tent and brought it back over for a peace offering. I guess Hawkeye was impressed, or just placated, but he let me stay so long as I kept conversation away from religiosity.”

“And on the condition that you continued drinking with us.” Trapper added.

Hawkeye took back over. “We drank the whole bottle of cognac, the contents of the still, and some of Duke’s Georgia moonshine. I wasn’t done yet, but there wasn’t a drop of alcohol left in the tent, so Dago went back to his tent and brought us a bottle of the wine he uses for mass—Dago Red wine. Before we polished off that bottle, Dago completely passed out.”

“It’s a miracle I didn’t die from alcohol poisoning,” Dago quipped, sipping his martini.

“You could have stopped at any time, babe,” Hawkeye pointed out. “It’s not my fault you didn’t know when to quit. Besides, Trap and I made sure you were still breathing.”

“Was that before or after you mummified me to the bunk with gauze and surgical tape?”

The three doctors erupted into laughter, practically falling over in hysterics as Jack watched the exchange, trying to imagine the scene in his mind.

“You should have seen it,” Hawkeye said, wiping tears of mirth from his face. “We hung a sign out front that said ‘See a Pickled Priest, 5¢.’”

“Henry was livid with you three.”

“And I wasn’t even there!” Duke asserted.

“That’s how I got my name, though. From then on, every time they saw me, they called me Dago Red, since that’s ultimately what did me in. The rest of the camp caught onto it pretty quickly and now the only people who call me by any other name are Colonel Blake, Radar, and Vollmer.”

“What would you prefer I call you?” Jack asked sincerely.

The chaplain smiled softly and shrugged. “Dago is fine. Like I said, I’m used to it.”

Jack felt an immediate affinity for the chaplain and watched him take another drink of the dry martini as Duke started to talk about which nurses were open to a casual fling and which ones were strictly off limits. The priest quickly drained the rest of his glass and held it out to Hawkeye.

“That’s my cue.” He announced as he stood up. “Behave yourselves, boys. Jack, in case it hasn’t been said, welcome to the Double Natural.”

#a snippet of a fic I wrote several years ago #Jack is one of my OCs #trying to rework some of my old writing to revamp and make it better #M*A*S*H #Dago Red Mulcahy

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variousqueerthings · 2 years

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Episodes we’ve seen in the last few days that have given us some amazing things Part II of III

Okay the next thing to talk about is some more Charles Stuff:

1. Him and Klinger being stuck in a storm. Great great choice to team them up to explore their dynamic, hope we get more of it!!! There’s something about the comedic odd-couple in the two of them – I wrote to my partner “relentlessly positive unstoppable force meets implacable negative immovable object” -- think Klinger might be good for him...

2. “Major Ego” – we get another iteration of Charles’ wanting to “one-up” Hawkeye/be recognised for being the best EXCEPT it’s not entirely what’s going on (as seems to happen often with Charles episodes), because he really wants Hawkeye’s appreciation and he really just wants to be recognised for being good at his job and go home! And so he makes a mistake and he owns up to the mistake, and rips up the article and Hawkeye appreciates him. Oh to bask in the appreciation of Hawkeye, eh Charles??

3. Charles and his winter hat moment, where he originally won’t give money to Mulcahy in the quite melancholy Christmas episode, but then having a whole little Moment when he sees the hat (and it was Mulcahy and Radar’s doing!) – another version of “it’s a bit deeper than that,” in the reminder of just how ill-equipped Charles is to this place

4. (also, speaking of implacable negativity – I mentioned it before, but he does that thing where he’s negative but not unwilling to try, ex. the placebo medicine, and we get the same when he helps Hawkeye and BJ hide the kid even though he thinks it’s futile… and in the end the kid goes to enlist after all... somethingsomething the different kinds of sanity on display in this series, and Charles’ version thereof is seeing Exactly how bleak it all is and deciding not to be okay with it)

5. Charles and Mulcahy! Another great odd couple team-up – and speaking of Mulcahy...

We had three great Mulcahy episodes in a row

1. When he goes out to get the pentothal and you discover he’s been getting stuff on the black market for awhile (a neat follow-up to when he and Klinger once stole back the penicillin) -- Very Badass Mulcahy!!!

2. When he helps out the pilot by balancing out the helicopter weight, despite being deathly afraid

3. And of course the whole Mulcahy Episode – another written and directed by Alan Alda. Generally very interested by the respect afforded to Mulcahy’s character in this episode. I think Alan Alda has a complicated relationship with religion (don’t we all….) and it would be so easy to go the cynical “oh, look at that silly idea that belief helps in any way, so unimportant next to the real things happening,” because the episode (and previous episodes) makes it very clear that he’s essential to this place. He’s carrying so much of everyone’s negativity and fear and hopelessness, and he has to act as so many different kinds of people in order to do so (religious/spiritual figure, nurse, supplies-getter, therapist, etc). A really genuine, lovely episode to different kinds of support and family

4. Also we finally got to see him in a shower. I’m not above objectifying his shoulder ratio, especially after it’s been hidden under turtlenecks for so long…

#im watching MASH #MASH #charles winchester #father mulcahy

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aelowan · 6 years

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Leftovers - A Books of Binding Flash Fiction

Jessie St. James felt a grin growing as she watched Justin MacDowell toddle around the worn wood floors of Otherworld Books, the stubby felt feathers on his turkey outfit sashaying with each bit of progress he made. She looked at Brian and found him grinning, too, teeth a flash of white against terracotta skin, before he leaned over and redirected his adopted little brother. “It’s hard to believe how much he’s grown in just a month,” she said, and decided to plant her plump butt in the doorway of the stock room to corral him a little.

Brian chuckled and nodded, bending to collect Justin. “Yeah, it is.” Justin objected loudly, gaze fixated on the Christmas display Brian was in the middle of assembling, and he patted the little boy’s back around the turkey accessories on his diapered tush in an attempt to distract and sooth. He sank onto the floor with Jessie and her insulated bag of Thanksgiving leftovers, and his stomach gave an appreciative grumble. A sheepish smile tugged at his lips. “That smells good.”

“Good!” Justin made grabby hands for the bag, evidently as interested in the smell as his big brother.

Jessie grinned at the toddler. “Oh yeah. About as good as it did the first time,” Jessie said, and gave a definitive nod as she unzipped the large doggie bag that Winter had so graciously provided. “I missed Winter’s cooking, you know, before everything,” she added with a glance over her shoulder, looking out for Norah MacDowell. While Brian’s mom was a wonderful person and incredibly kind, she was human and just wasn’t privy to what had happened in the last month—or some of the things that had come before. Jessie dug into the bag and came up with a Tupperware container and an itty-bitty spoon, handing them to her friend with a wry smile. “Winter also sent Justin some pumpkin pudding. Have to get him started young on that addiction.”

The young Black man laughed. “What else is in your goodie bag?”

“Hmm.” Jessie dug out stacks of plastic dishes, spreading them out between them. “Looks like the whole kit-and-caboodle. Winter likes to set people up in style, you know. Want to help me eat some of it?” It was almost like a date… on the floor… with a baby brother squealing for his share. So yeah, almost. Almost sort of counted when you were seventeen, right?

Now if only Brian wasn’t too good for her.

“It would be a terrible, terrible crime to turn down a Mulcahy plate!” Brian said, playfully scandalized as he got Justin settled into his lap for his snack—the gateway drug into all things pumpkin spiced.

“Wouldn’t it?” While Justin happily nommed away, Jessie took a few slices of Winter’s homemade bread and added some turkey and cranberry sauce before passing it along, feeling deliciously domestic. Then, Jessie’s lips pulled into a thoughtful frown when Brian took the sandwich.

Her friend tilted his head, his long, pencil-thin dreads swinging. “What’s wrong?”

Just as quickly, that frown quirked into a smile. “Just thinking. Wondering how you’re doing now that you’re in the ‘in-crowd,’ so to speak… Do you want to talk about it?” It was at least putting it on the metaphorical table.

Brian adjusted Justin on his lap and set the sandwich on his knee, deliberating in his answer. “I can’t say I didn’t suspect something was going on with you at the Theatre, but…” Brian shrugged one shoulder, “it’s a lot to swallow. I won’t deny that it’s nice to know I’m going to do something worthwhile with my life, and make an impact for the better. There’s more certainty in that than I can say I’ve had before.”

“Why’s that?”

The dark-skinned teen just shrugged, again. “Growing up out there,” he made a vague gesture to the streets with one hand, and gave his little brother another spoonful of pudding with the other, “sometimes you have to wonder.” Another sheepish smile immediately followed. “That’s not to discount what Norah’s done for me—and that’s been a lot. Being a Hero, though… that pays things forward in the best way, if you can believe in Destiny.”

“I do believe in Destiny.” Someday, that Destiny would take Brian from her, but she was determined to get the most of every day she had with him. Jessie found a smile for him and playfully nudged his knee with her sneaker. “But, you don’t have to be a Hero with emphasis on the capital H to be the everyday hero variety. Winter and I are ‘come as you are’ people. You know that. And Norah knows it without the rest of the picture,” she said, and scooted over to eat her lunch with him just in time to catch a flash of flush across his terracotta cheeks. Maybe…? Naw. “Now, after we go Jaws on this bountiful feast, what can I help you with here? Not really in the mood to go home yet.” She was never in the mood to go home, but that was another story.

He laughed, grateful for the excuse to move on. “If you need an excuse to be busy, you can help me with this display.”

“Perfect.”

#The Books of Binding #A. E. Lowan #Brian MacDowell #Jessie St. James #Justin MacDowell #Otherworld Books #Seahaven #Leftovers #flash fiction #wizard #Hero

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morewyckedthanyou · 3 years

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MASH fandom

Thanks for the ask! 😄 I was hoping someone would ask me about my latest hyperfixation too... and you delivered.

the first character i ever fell in love with:

Before I'd even watched a single episode of the thing, I already knew I loved Klinger based on the few Tumblr posts I'd seen. After starting to watch the show, however... I very soon realized I stood no change and Hawkeye was going to be another favourite. I guess bi-coded disaster characters using humour as a coping mechanism are my downfall. This is a theme when it comes to many of my favourites in different fandoms.

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not:

I'm probably going to upset many BJ fangirls and fanboys with this one but... when he first appeared on the show, I did like him and I had high hopes for his character. But I very soon grew kinda bored. I don't dislike BJ but I also really don't think he's all that complex or interesting. :/

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not:

I don't really have one in this fandom I think.

my ultimate favorite character™:

Mulcahy my beloved 😘

prettiest character:

Objectively speaking I guess Margaret. She is really pretty, there is no denying it. However I am also biased and I enjoy seeing Mulcahy in his tight black t-shirts a lot. He also has kind eyes and a kind smile which make him immediately very pretty in my eyes.

Honorary mention goes to nurse Kellye, because I think she's simply adorable and if I were trying to have a good time with someone while being stuck at a MASH unit during the Korean War, it'd be with her. She's my type. 😏

my most hated character:

I love to hate Frank.

my OTP:

Because apparently I like to make myself suffer from the lack of content... Hawkcahy.

my NOTP:

Again I'm probably upsetting all the BJ fans but I really don't care for Hunnihawk.

favorite episode:

Oh god, I really don't know... There are so many good episodes that I like for different reasons. But some of my all time fave episodes are Dear Dad, Fallen Idol and Mulcahy's War, just to mention some off the top of my head.

saddest death:

Even though it happened off-screen... Henry. 😭 I really liked him and when Radar announced his death... you bet I cried.

favorite season:

I haven't actually watched all the seasons yet - I still have the last 3 seasons left to watch and a few episodes from season 8 as well. But out of the ones I have seen... I'd say maybe season 6? It has good Mulcahy centric content, and also we now have Charles who replaced Frank - I was really getting sick of Frank.

least favorite season:

Out of the ones I've seen, maybe season 2? There wasn't enough Mulcahy content for my liking for one... but I also think there were some "filler" episodes that I didn't care that much about. Although, then again, I do like some episodes in season 2 a lot.

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate:

I don't hate him. I just find him kinda boring. Yes I'm talking about BJ again oh god forgive me BJ fans.

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave:

Trapper. But I think Hawkeye does fit in this category quite well too, lol.

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave:

Radar deserves nothing but the best. He is just a baby and doesn't get nearly enough credit or respect all things considered.

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship:

Idk, does my OTP count? Hawkeye is the only one depraved enough to make a pass at the priest and also corrupt him succesfully I think.

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship:

Don't ask me why because I can't even explain it myself but for some reason I think Klinger/Radar would've been kinda cute. 😂

#summerreign4077 #answer #fandom asks

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angryhausfrau-writes · 3 years

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Something Old and Something New - Chapter 2: California Dreaming

“Letter for you dear – it's from Hawkeye.”

BJ rushes to collect the letter from the kitchen table.

He and Hawkeye have been writing back and forth since they got home – Hawkeye since literally the day after he landed stateside – and they average several letters a month. Simple letters about simple lives. But each letter is a precious connection to the man he'd been best friends with in Korea – and BJ still feels the same fluttering excitement at this letter as he did the first.

He kisses Peg on the cheek, pours himself a drink, and retreats to his office. This is something to be savored.

And of course he'll tell Peg everything in the letter – Hawkeye always includes plenty of amusing gossip – but BJ likes that first read through or five to be his alone. Likes to let the rest of the world fall away, let the sounds of his wife and children and the steady thrum of the washing machine be muffled by the closed door and the haze of memory and pretend it's just him and Hawkeye alone in the Swamp again.

BJ settles back in his chair and lets the sense of anticipation build as he slides the letter opener between the flaps of the envelope. He's taken to keeping all of Hawkeye's letters in a box in his office and he likes to keep everything intact, just the way Hawkeye sent it. Trying to hold as much of Hawkeye here with him as he can.

But it's difficult, what with hundreds of miles between them. With lives and jobs and responsibilities.

With families.

BJ had spent all of his time in Korea hoping and dreaming and aching to be back with his family. Back with Peg, the love of his life. Back with Erin, who he hardly knew – who he'd been torn away from. Kept from watching and helping through all those firsts – first word, first step, first tooth.

They've made up for it since then, BJ being there for a whole new slew of firsts – first day at preschool, first ride on the Ferris wheel, first time going swimming. And with another baby in the house, he'd more than made up for all the diapers he'd missed changing, all the waking in the middle of the night for episodes of colic, all the messy terrible wonder of it all.

He wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

And that's saying nothing of Peg - his wife, his partner, the woman he loves to death. The woman who'd kept him afloat through the worst parts of his life. Been a buoy through the overwhelming deluge of residency. Been a tether to home through the turbulence of the Korean war.

BJ loves her so much it hurts.

But he finds himself missing Hawkeye, too. In the quiet of the evening, when Peg and the kids have gone up to bed and BJ's had a few drinks and he's just the right side of sloppily nostalgic, he lets himself ache for the breathless Korean summer nights when it was so hot you were glued to your cot but too warm to even think about sleeping. Nights when he'd lain awake with Hawkeye awake across the tent from him. Not talking, not even looking at each other. But BJ so, so aware of Hawkeye laying there – shirtless and gleaming in the moonlight that filtered in through the open sides of the tent.

He aches for those nights, and for Hawkeye's uncomplicated presence in his life.

Not much about Hawkeye can be considered uncomplicated. But in those moments, when there were no expectations of each other, nothing voiced aloud – when they could just be with one another. BJ misses that. Misses that sense of peace, of understanding.

So each letter from Hawkeye – each line of connection stretching out between them – is precious. A reminder that their friendship is special. Something to be kept locked in BJ's heart alongside his love for Peg and his kids.

Don't get him wrong, BJ has plenty of other friends – fellow professors at Stanford, old college buddies. His motorcycle club. And there's a few guys in the club who remind him of Hawkeye, actually. But it's not the same. And when BJ gets drunk enough to turn maudlin – the kind of drunk that sees him sleeping in the guest bedroom instead of with Peg – he can admit to himself that he wishes Hawkeye was here with him.

They'd been such a large part of each other's lives – practically joined at the hip twenty-four seven for over a year. And then Hawkeye had just been gone. On the opposite side of the country and living his own life.

His life without BJ. And with Trapper.

So many of Hawkeye's early letters talked incessantly about that smarmy bastard. And, BJ knows logically, it makes sense that Hawkeye would talk about him. After all, they live together.

Trapper gets to be in Hawkeye's life everyday. Trapper doesn't have to communicate solely through letters for over a year – with only one too short, too confusing visit to tide him over until the next time he can plausibly go see Hawkeye. Trapper gets to have some weird domestic little setup with Hawkeye – like they're fucking married or something. Cooking for each other and keeping house together and-.

BJ is jealous as hell.

And it had bled into his letters to Hawkeye. All BJ's jealousy and resentment and longing had been too much to hide. And it had come out in angry, snide little jabs at Trapper - at Trapper's character and opinions and abilities as a surgeon.

Eventually, Hawkeye must have gotten sick of it because he'd stopped writing about Trapper at all. There's holes now in all his letters where Trapper used to live. It's not exactly better – BJ knows Trapper is still in Hawkeye's life. But the childish, jealous, mean part of him is glad he doesn't have it shoved in his face anymore.

Until now, anyway. Because Trapper's all over Hawkeye's latest letter.

Trapper gets all the way through his letters to Max and Radar and Father Mulcahy by the time Hawkeye finishes his letter to BJ.

And part of it is that Hawkeye's just more verbose than Trapper – both out loud and in writing. Trapper's letters during the war were always pretty short and not overly flowery. Whereas Hawkeye can spin a yarn to rival the Homeric epics – and enjoys doing so when he's got an appreciative audience. Trapper's girls, for instance.

But part of it is that writing to BJ takes careful thought. Strategy. An intimate knowledge of all of BJ's sore spots – and how to avoid them.

And BJ's biggest sore spot is Trapper. Which is unfortunate, because Trapper features pretty prominently in Hawkeye's life, for some reason. Like, oh, they're living together.

Sure, Hawkeye has other friends. And Trapper does too. But at the end of the day, they're in each other's lives nearly constantly. Trapper's family is Hawkeye's family and Hawkeye's is Trapper's. They spend an awful lot of time together, even without their relationship coming into things. And it gets pretty difficult writing about his life without mentioning Trapper at all.

But if Hawkeye mentions Trapper, then BJ gets huffy. And it's no fun writing a guy who makes the rude kind of sarcastic comments about your lover best friend partner. So Hawkeye's taken to editing him out. Explicit mentions, anyway – cuz there's no real way to completely remove Trapper from his life, they're just too intertwined for that to be possible.

And it's not like Hawkeye really wants to try that hard, anyway. It's BJ's problem that he can't handle Hawkeye having another “best friend.” But still, tact is required – so he starts the letter kind of easing into things.

Dear BJ,

I hope you and Peg and the kids are well.

From you last letter, it sounds like Peg's keeping you plenty busy getting ready for Christmas – including getting you to buy a flocking gun. BJ, I thought you were a pacifist! All those months in Korea and you never touched a gun. And you get back home and what do you do? Open fire on a bunch of defenseless palm trees. (I'm joking, I know you're too far north for that. You live in the land of towering pines, as you keep reminding me with photos of your new house. It sure looks nice – maybe someday I'll even get to see it in person. It'd be nice to get a look at it without your thumb covering half the view.) At any rate, you made a great Father Christmas for all the orphanage kids, so you shouldn't disappoint at the Church pageant. Even if you are handicapped by your lack of mustache.

There, that ought to put BJ in a good mood. He loves talking about his family.

Unfortunately for BJ's equanimity, most of what Hawkeye's been up to this past week has involved Trapper and the girls. Still, a little careful editing of events (and pronouns) and Trapper's name doesn't need to be mentioned. After all, Hawkeye's trying to butter BJ up here, get him to go along with Trapper's gift idea, not put him in a snit.

Speaking of flocking - get your mind out of the gutter Beej, I know what jokes you're making to yourself - it's strange for this New England lad to imagine having to make fake snow. We've got enough of the real stuff around here to last until July. We were planning to go up to visit Dad around Thanksgiving like we did last year, since the kids enjoyed it so much, but a storm blew in and they closed the Boston to Maine line and we had to stay home. Still, the girls had a good time making snow forts in the back yard. And all of Kathy's experience as a softball champ really helped her whup our butts in a snowball fight – I don't think I've ever faced such a resounding defeat sportswise.

And then we made cookies to send to my dad to make up for not visiting. I've sent along a few for you and the family. Because a little bribery never hurt anyone. Becky made one special for Peg on account of the new baby – it's the sort of oval one that's meant to be a baby in a manger. I hope you enjoy them. I had absolutely nothing to do with their creation – other than drinking hot chocolate and kibitzing while they were getting made – so they turned out pretty edible. The girls have really improved on their cookies since those first ones they shipped me in Korea. I think most of those ended up in the rock-skipping competition.

BJ must think Hawkeye's awfully full of himself, using the royal we so frequently. That or he realizes that Hawkeye actually means him and Trapper when he uses it but has decided it's not worth getting angry about that as long as Trapper's name goes unmentioned. BJ's drawn stranger lines in the sand.

So has Hawkeye, come to think of it. But it's frustrating to have to edit his life so much. He's already lying by omission to so many people about the truth of his relationship with Trapper. And it's not like Hawkeye doesn't understand the necessity of discretion – he doesn't actually want to get arrested – but to have to hide the truth of himself from his own best friend is hard.

But Hawkeye doesn't know how to broach the subject. Particularly when BJ's so touchy about everything Trapper. Maybe he'll have a chance to talk things through if he sees BJ in person – or at least ask why he's got his shirt in a knot ever since his visit last spring. Because he wasn't nearly so weird about things before then – content to ignore Hawkeye's mentions of Trapper rather than make snide comments about him. But Hawkeye can't interrogate him unless he actually shows up, so he'd better get to that part of the letter.

Speaking of terrible things from Korea, Charles's wedding is coming up in just six short months. Why we need that long of a heads up about it I'm sure I don't know – but then again, I'm not a beacon of class and taste. Or ridiculously loaded – whatever the impetus is there. Regardless, I heard through the grapevine that you've been invited to the wedding. Since I miraculously made the cut - along with several other members of the 4077 – I wanted to see if you'd planned on attending. I think the whole deal will be much more fun with as many of us miscreants as possible in attendance to balance out the stuffed shirts.

Anyway, if you're planning on going, we've got a little scheme you might be interested in. Charles is richer than rich and a snob to boot so we can't all get him something that he'd want individually – not without breaking the bank. But we – all us MASH guys - could all pitch in on something and get him a present he actually likes. And I had the idea of doing something sentimental, to really make sure he appreciates the gift and doesn't just open it right into the garbage can. And the idea of doing a quilt got suggested - and Margaret and Sidney and Steve are all for it - so I'm asking around to see if anyone else wants in. We're petitioning Max to take charge of the project – so expect a letter from Toledo. I don't know if you've already got a gift idea – or if you're planning on attending the wedding at all - but if you want in, the offer's open.

This next part, Hawkeye isn't one-hundred percent sure about. But when he'd asked Trapper what he thought of the idea, he'd just shrugged and said he's fine with whatever. Sometimes Hawkeye gets a little aggravated by how easy-going Trapper can be.

It's not that Hawkeye wants him to be jealous. Or for him to start a fight with BJ – the fight that BJ himself is clearly gunning for. But when he asks for Trapper's opinion, he honestly wants to hear it.

“C'mon, Trapper. I honestly want to hear your opinion.”

Trapper sighs. “Ok, fine. I just – I know BJ's your friend and I don't wanna badmouth him, you know? But I'm getting kinda tired of him getting all up-in-arms every time you so much as mention me. I tried to get along with him when he visited - and I thought I did a pretty good job of it - so I got no idea what I did to make him hate me so much. But I think it's pretty damn petty of him to make you kinda tip toe around him when you write.”

Trapper pauses. He could say more here – more about his impression of BJ's character and his friendship with Hawkeye - but he ain't trying to start a fight. Just avoid one with BJ.

“So anyway. I don't mind if you invite him to stay an extra day – he's your friend and you don't get a lot of chances to see him. But I don't know that I'll want to stick around for it.”

Having said his piece, Trapper heads off to make dinner while Hawkeye mulls all that over. He knows Trapper's right about the way BJ's been acting – it's petty and silly and Hawkeye's been getting kind of tired of it himself, to be honest. But Hawkeye's always been one to try and keep the peace, the one to try to keep everyone together and afloat through tough times.

And it's difficult – painful – the idea of losing BJ's friendship. He means so much to Hawkeye. They'd been through so much together. When he'd told BJ he'd never be able to shake him, Hawkeye had meant it. There's a big old BJ shaped place in Hawkeye's life that he doesn't want to have to try and fill over.

But BJ could be making a little bit more of an effort here, too. Profess an interest in Hawkeye's life – all the parts of Hawkeye's life – the way Hawkeye had listened to BJ's endless chatter about his wife and daughter and all the minutia of their lives. Even though Hawkeye had no frame of reference for raising a kid or having a wife, no real interest in the topic outside of BJ wanting to talk about it.

And Hawkeye's maybe feeling a little petty himself. A little annoyed at BJ's insistence that Hawkeye bend over backwards for him without really reciprocating. So he goes back and rewrites the letter to explicitly mention Trapper where before there had just been euphemism. Even if it means BJ won't go along with the gift idea.

But Hawkeye does value BJ's friendship. Does want to see him. So he adds on the extra part inviting him and Peg to visit.

Speaking of offers, I was wondering if you and Peg wanted to stay over an extra couple of days in Boston after the wedding (assuming you're going.) I've never met Peg, but I'd really like a chance to get to know her. And I don't see you nearly often enough. We have a bunch of time before anything needs to be settled, but I'd love to see you for more than just a wedding reception – particularly one that's being run by Charles Winchester. I hope to hear from you soon (and maybe see you in half a year.) Your friend, Hawkeye

There, that ought to do it.

Peg looks up from her book as BJ emerges from his office. His face is a thundercloud and Hawkeye's letter is crumpled in his fist.

Peg sighs.

Letters from Hawkeye usually leave BJ floating on air – his face alight with joy and his gestures expansive as he recounts the latest news from Boston. But when things swing the other way – when the letters contain something that reminds BJ of the bad parts of the war, of all the things he's lost – he gets angry like Peg's never seen.

It's like something came back with him from Korea – something deep and angry and wild riding her husband. Peg doesn't know where it came from, or what causes it to come out, most of the time. She doesn't know how to make it go away.

But when BJ gets the bottle of bottom-shelf gin out of the liquor cabinet – the one he says almost tastes like the homemade hooch that came out of Hawkeye's still in Korea – Peg knows she's in for a long night.

So she calls up her mother-in-law, asks if she can keep the kids overnight. Puts away anything she doesn't want to see broken – all the nick-knacks and souvenirs of her and BJ's life together tucked safely away in the cabinets experience has taught her he won't try to open. Peg battens down the hatches and waits for the storm to blow over.

Eventually, BJ reaches the stage of drunk where he's wrecked his office and yelled himself out and he's just sitting drunkenly at the kitchen table, staring at the bottom of his empty glass. Peg sits down across from him. Watches him pour another measure from a new bottle and drink that too. Waits for him to tell her what's wrong.

“Hawkeye's asking if we're planning to be at Charles's wedding,” BJ starts with a vehemence the statement really doesn't warrant, as far as Peg can tell. “Wants to know if he'll see us there.”

“He's going, then?” Peg asks delicately. Trying to figure out what's bothering her husband without getting him any more upset than he already is.

“Yep.” BJ bits out. “He and Trapper will both be there.”

Ah. There it is. If anything is guaranteed to put BJ in a less than charitable mood, it's mentions of Trapper John McIntyre.

“That doesn't mean you need to interact with Trapper, dear. It's not like you'll be forced to spend time with him.”

BJ snorts derisively. “Trapper hangs off Hawkeye like they're joined together surgically. There's no way I'll get to see one without the other.”

And that's to say nothing of Hawkeye's regard for Trapper. Trapper, Trapper, Trapper. The whole fucking letter was full of Trapper. Trapper did this, Trapper thinks that, Trapper had this idea. Hawkeye couldn't go a sentence without mentioning Trapper. It makes BJ sick to his stomach, so he drinks another glass of gin.

“And apparently, Trapper had some big idea about us MASH docs all making Charles a wedding present together. Like we're all some big, happy family. And Hawkeye wants to do it, so that means I have to too.”

Never mind that Max is the one actually running things. And that BJ probably won't have to have anything to do with Trapper or his dumb stupid self. It's the principle of the matter.

“And if that wasn't enough, we got invited to stay over at Hawkeye's house an extra couple of days.”

“That sounds nice,” Peg says encouragingly. BJ's calmed down enough to have a coherent conversation at this point and she'd like to keep as positive a spin on things as she can. “I'd sure like to spend some time getting to know Hawkeye after hearing so much about him from you.”

“You don't understand,” BJ interrupts sharply. “If we visit for longer, then we'll stay overnight at Hawkeye's house. And that means that Hawkeye will give up his room. And that means he and Trapper will sleep together.”

“I know you think Hawkeye and Trapper are... together,” Peg says gently, placatingly. “But you can't think they'd do anything untoward with us right next door.”

BJ does think that, though. He thinks about it a lot.

About that night he'd stayed over at Hawkeye's house, in Hawkeye's bedroom – leaving Hawkeye to sleep with Trapper. About Hawkeye – beautiful, unreal, gorgeous Hawkeye – and Trapper – with his stupid muscles and his stupid smirk and his stupid everything – laying together in the dark. About them kissing each other. Cuz BJ may hate the guy, but he has to admit that Trapper's attractive – just objectively speaking. Anyone would be attracted to him. And Hawkeye's beautiful and so passionate and-. There's no way they wouldn't kiss one another. And BJ can imagine it so clearly – their mouths slick and panting, tongues sliding against each other.

Hips grinding.

And that leads BJ to thinking about Hawkeye and Trapper having sex. Trapper taking Hawkeye while BJ's right next door – rough and hard and loud enough there's no mistaking what's happening. All the little sounds he's heard Hawkeye make from across the Swamp in the middle of the night – all those little sighs and moans of pleasure – being caused by Trapper while BJ's forced to just lay there and listen to it through the wall. Forced to imagine what Hawkeye looks like when he's being taken by another man, forced to imagine what Hawkeye looks like when he orgasms. Forced to imagine Hawkeye and Trapper look like all cuddled up together in the afterglow.

Anger – it's anger, it has to be anger – squirms in BJ's guts. He drinks another glass of gin.

“I'm not putting up with that shit,” BJ mumbles. “Not again.”

Because however bad imagining it is, knowing would be worse.

BJ lapses back into silence. And he's clearly still angry, but he seems to have moved past the more explosive sort of anger and into something a little less disruptive. And if he's just going to stare at the bottom of a glass all night, she's going to bed.

“Maybe just sleep on it, dear, before you make any decisions,” Peg says gently. “I'm going to bed now. We can talk about this more in the morning.”

BJ looks blearily up at her, almost like he'd forgotten she was there. Definitely time for her to go to bed. She pours BJ a glass of water and kisses him gently on the forehead before she heads upstairs - and through it all, he just sits there, staring down at his empty glass.

Peg vows that she's going to get to the bottom of all of this, even if she has to use a team of wild horses to drag the truth out of BJ.

#mash #piercintyre #something old and something new #chapter 2

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