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awkward-gay-bro · 4 years

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A New Chapter

Tom wanted to start a new chapter in his life, that’s why he left. He’d done some amazing things, and despite what anyone said, he was leaving behind a legacy. But to him, it felt different. He’d fought alongside these men for a long time. Hell, he’d played for the team for twenty seasons. He joined that team before most of Gronkowski’s slam pieces could talk. So to him, he wasn’t just leaving behind a legacy. He was leaving behind a family. That’s why Gronk was making him go out tonight. They were celebrating an end of an era, and as Julian had said, they were cementing that their bond would last beyond any team.

Tom was hesitant for this boy’s night out, he was a good decade older than his former teammates. He may be in peak physical condition, but he couldn’t deny that he couldn’t keep up with them on any sort of club scene. He’d much rather be at home with his family, just enjoying a beer. Tom had tried to convince Gronk that they should just come over, have a nice dinner, and maybe a game of poker, but his playboy friend wouldn’t have it. Gronk had insisted they go out in a blaze of glory.

So after picking up Julian, he and Tom met up with said playboy friend, and they all jumped into the overly extra escalade limo. “I told you we’d need a driver, Tommy boy,” Gronk said as he pulled open a bottle of cognac and started pouring. “We’ll ease you in with a drink now to get you’re warmed up, but we are definitely taking shots right after.”

“Guys, I can’t go too hard, I’ve got early morning brunch with Giselle and the kids tomorrow,” Brady pleaded to deaf ears. Gronk shoved the glass into his hands before taking a swig directly from the bottle.

“What’s the point of the driver if we don’t have some fun?” Gronk chuckled. He rose to his feet, pulling Brady up with him and said, “Tom, look at me.” He placed his hand on Tom’s shoulder. “This is our last hurrah, you can go back into family mode in the morning. Tonight is all about having fun, right Edelman?”

“Right,” Julian responded, laughing at his friends as he reclined into the cushiony limousine chair.

“You said you wanted to start a new chapter, Tommy boy, well that starts with us closing this chapter. You want to give it a proper ending don’t you?” Gronk said, putting out his hand for a shake to seal the deal.

Tom reluctantly grabbed the other man’s hand, finally giving in. “Fine, but you have to explain my hang over to Gise-” Before he could finish his sentence the limo came to a crashing stop. Brady and Gronkowski went flying from the impact, and everything went black.

************************************************************************

Tom woke up in a room he’d never seen before. It looked like a hospital room, but one that would be on the set of Star Trek. There were all sorts of machines he’d never seen in a hospital before. He couldn’t understand what anything was or why he was there. Then everything came back to him. He was standing in a limo with his friends and then…

“Rob! Julian!”

“Julian’s fine,” a soft voice said. Tom looked over and saw his former teammate laying in a hospital bed like his own. He looked deflated. The rugged face and imposing frame Tom was used to seeing was gone, replaced by a softened face sitting on a withered body.

“That’s good, what happened to us? How long have we been out?” Tom asked in a panic, assuming it must have been a long time if Gronk’s muscles have atrophied to such a degree.

“The crash was last night, you slept in for a while but not much more than a hangover would have caused,” came an unfamiliar voice. An insanely tall man walked into the room, “My name is Vince, and I think we should have a talk, Tommy.”

“My name is Tom,” he yelled, “And what’s going on? Where are we?”

“You’re in our lab. You suffered a fatal accident last night, so you were brought here,” the man said calmly.

“How could it be fatal if we are talking?” Gronk yelled out.

“We have found a way to heal even the most egregious wounds. A way to pull someone back even when they have one foot out the gate. However, there are some side effects,” the man said, moving towards the two. “Your colleague, Julian, is quite the fan of ours. He quickly called us and got in touch with your families. We filled them in with what we could do, and what the outcome would be otherwise. We also filled them in with what our end of the bargain would be, and they all agreed.”

“What do you mean your end of the bargain? We didn’t agree to anything,” Brady said angrily.

“It’s simple enough, you’ll be the newest additions to our new wrestling league,” the imposing man said, “And I assure you, all of the paperwork has been signed and the contract is binding.”

“I think I’d rather stick to my current career,” Tom responded, “I don’t know much about wrestling.”

“I think you’ll find your body isn’t much fit for football anymore, and don’t worry, this isn’t your typical wrestling. I think you’ll be a fan favorite soon enough.” As he said this, a nurse walked into the room, pushing a rather large mirror. “Now brace yourselves, boys, this step in the process can often be jarring. It’s time to meet your new you.”

Tom and Rob started to climb out of their beds, their feet dangling above the floor. Reality began to set in to both men, formerly well above six foot, that it wasn’t just their muscles that had shrunk. They walked to each other first, which gave them a terrifying glimpse into what their own appearance would look like. Rob realized that he’d lost the two inches in height he’d usually had over his friend. Realizing he didn’t know the size of this room, he had no focus point to find out his new height.

“How tall are you Vince?” he whimpered.

“Well, I tell everyone 6’2’’, but I’ll be honest. I’m 6’1’’.”

Both men’s eyes went wide, this imposing man was standing three to five inches lower than where they should be. And they didn’t even meet his chin. Gronk oddly held out his hand to his friend. He needed support to take that next step of looking in the mirror. The former ladies man wouldn’t have ever felt the need for that physical embrace, but for some reason all he wanted was the former Tom there to protect him. The new Tom’s hand was small and dainty, void of any of the callouses two decades of ball had given him, which made Gronk’s stomach drop and flutter simultaneously.

“If you’d like a moment to take everything in, I can step away. I’ll be back in a few minutes so that you can redress.”

Hand in hand they walked in front of the mirror and took in their new selves. Their hospital gowns fell shapelessly, masking their new silhouettes. They undid the strings and let them flutter to the ground. With their hands still clasped, they studied every nook and cranny of their lithe new frames. Their muscled chests had been completely flattened, and their rigid abs had been completely smoothed out. The dainty hands that were still entwined were connected to slim and hairless arms. Their shoulders had collapsed in on themselves, showing that their backs would no longer have the straining muscles either was used to.

Their bodies weren’t the only things that had changed. Though they could still recognize each other, there was no denying that their faces were slightly different. Most obvious at first glance was the complete lack of hair beneath their eyes, while the rest of their hair had grown more lush. Even their lashes were longer, fluttering whimsically every time they blinked. Rob’s lips had filled out, something that he’d love to see on a girl about to go down, but it was jarring on his own face. No longer did Tom look older than his peer, all signs of age had vanished from his face, crows feet, laugh lines, they’d all faded away leaving him looking twenty years younger.

The men took a deep breath and finally looked down. Their once proud packages had dwindled away to nothing. Gronk had always been proud of the girth that he had hidden, but now it would like tiny even in his own diminutive hand. They were completely devoid of hair, it looked like they’d gotten the full Brazillian. Tom caught himself staring more at his friends package then his own, he’d seen it in his former glory time and time again, and didn’t know why he was missing it so much. For a moment, Tom realized that he was standing naked, holding a man’s hand, staring at his package. But that thought quickly faded, as Rob was the only part of this whole experience that felt right.

When Rob looked over to do his own inspection of his peer, he was shocked to see that something hadn’t shrunk at all. If anything, it had grown. “Holy shit, that’s huge!” he said, his jaw dropping. For the first time since they’d stripped he untangled his hand as he walked behind his friend for a better look. “Tom, you’re thicc.”

“What are you talking about?” he said as he placed his hands on his rear. His once perky behind had grown massive. He could still feel muscle, but it was now behind a healthy layer of jiggling fat. Before he could continue his exploration, Rob pushed his hands away, placing his own palms on the other man’s naked ass. The two ballooning cheeks felt even bigger with his now tiny hands, and he couldn’t help himself from tightening his grip firmly on them. This sensation shot all the blood in his Tom’s body directly to his package, his tiny nub now standing firmly at its full inadequate two inches. Never before had a man’s touch caused this sort of feeling, which put him into a panic. Rob was dealing with a panic of his own, as all he wanted to do was dive face-first into the other man’s new assets. Quickly stopping himself, Gronk turned around to check out his own rear end, looking to see if he’d gained a similar new shape.

Tom was terrified that his friend would see his erection, but his smaller endowment went completely unnoticed. They both craned their necks to look at their new buns in the mirror. Gronk was actually happy with his new butt, he’d been known to shake his booty on the dance floor. His butt looked like it had stayed the same size, while the rest of him had shrunk around it. But even with how disproportionate it was, it was still overshadowed by the mammoth behind his cohort had grown.

“Knock, knock” Vince said. Quickly the men pulled up their robes, not comfortable with someone who’d been smaller than them seeing their fairy like frames. As he entered the room he chuckled quietly, noticing that neither man was able to keep their shelf like bubbles contained in their robes. “I hope that was enough time for you to get acquainted with your post rejuvenation bodies. Now let’s get down to the nitty gritty of your new contracts. Obviously, Tommy, we’ve made the appropriate payments to the Buccaneers and your contract with them has been dissolved.”

“You can’t do that!” Tom yelled.

“I think you’ll agree that you don’t belong on a football field anymore. Now, due to some of the psychological aspects of this change, we’ve found that it’s best you have a care taker. We’ve decided it best to keep you both together, so we’ll be setting you up with a nice apartment for your caretaker and you both.”

“I have a family! I’ll be living with them! My wife-”

“Your wife is well aware of our new arrangement and is in full support. She’d rather you be alive like this than not at all. And she understands that you will have certain new needs that she can not provide. She also advised us she didn’t want your children seeing you like this just yet. Now, the nurse here has been kind of enough to help you both get dressed and drive you to your new residence, so be polite to him. I will meet you there where we can get you set up with your new wrestling personas.”

************************************************************************

As they waked into their new apartment, the nurse bid them adieu with a nice goodbye smack on Brady’s ass. Tom was more shocked by the soft moan that the grab had elicited, so he quickly started to explore the new apartment. It was a pretty nice place, wonderful view, nice modern set up, but though it had multiple rooms set up, only one had a bed. The bed was bigger than any he’d seen, but he was still shocked to find he’d have to share with Gronkowski. He made a note to himself that Gronk would have to sleep on the couch.

As Tom walked back into the living room he saw Vince standing there. “Ah good, you’re finally here,” Vince said. “You’ll find the room down the hall has your new costume, Tommy. Robbie, yours in the room to your left. Your handler has filled us in on the personas that you would both be most comfortable with.”

As they’d time had gone on, both men had grown more complacent with their new lot. Though Tom hated it, he found that if even his wife wanted this, there was nothing he could do. Gronkowski at first was furious at his loss in stature, but all the attention he’d received from the nurses and lab staff had made him start to enjoy his new role. Even if the attention had all come from men, he was an attention whore and he’d take it where he could get it. As they both made their way to their rooms to change, they heard the noise of a door opening and a familiar voice coming from the living room.

“Ah, you’re finally here. I’m sure you’ve filled out all the paperwork and you understand your new duties as a member of our company?” they heard Vince ask.

“I do. And honestly I’m elated to get to be a part of it. I’ve been a big fan of the new league. Are they here yet?” The other voice asked.

“Yes, Mr. Edelman, they are getting changed into the costumes you suggested as we speak.”

“Oh, call me Julian. And I’m so excited you liked the names.”

“Alright boys! Time to come out!” Vince yelled down the hall. As the two former athletes walked out to the living room, they were shocked to find their former teammate standing in front of them. “Julian, meet the Playboy and the Patriot.”

Julian looked down to see the scantily clad twinks that had once towered over him. Tom Brady was wearing a blue tank top that showed off his supple lithe arms, which had his former number twelve emblazoned on the breast. His small package was now concealed in an American flag styled speedo. Julian smiled to himself as Tom tried to shield the view from his bulge, and smiled harder when he saw how far those stripes stretched out on Tom’s backside. With Tom, the tank top at least hung a bit to hide his upper body, but with Gronkowski, the skin tight black leotard was painted on. Julian was ecstatic to see the direction they’d gone with his Playboy idea. Bunny ears stuck up from Rob’s styled hair, while his neck and wrists were encased in a cute bow tie and adorable cuffs. The piece de resistance however, was the fluffy bunny tail resting above the tight end’s wide receiver.

“Tommy, Robbie, I couldn’t handle what had happened to either of you and I knew I couldn’t go on in a world with either of you missing. So I called Vince’s people right away and of course I volunteered to be your handler when they explained the mechanics of the situation.”

Rob had always had to look down at his smaller friend, but now he was staring straight up at the other man. He’d never really thought about it in his former life, but he couldn’t help noticing now that Edelman looked as much like a model as he did a NFL player. His heart fluttered as he walked over to his friend. Tom had a similar feeling, wanting to be mad that Julian could do something like this to him, but he also felt an unusual feeling while he stared at the sculpted man. Again he felt his tiny nub raise to attention, hardly noticeable even in his skin tight briefs.

“Come here for a second, Robbie,” Julian beckoned. Gronk’s heart fluttered a bit as he walked over to his friend, who reached down and tugged on his fluffy bunny tail. Immediately Gronk moaned out in pleasure, confirming Julian’s theory of how the tail was kept in place. “Nice,” he said as he moved his hand down to cup Gronk’s left cheek.

“Now you will all have plenty of time to discuss your new arrangement boys, but our league moves fast. We have to go out and take some promotional pictures of you in your new personas. You’ve got your debut match coming up this Friday and you’re going up against the most popular tag team in the League,” Vince explained, rushing the men out the room.

“Don’t worry guys, I’ve been talking to Dean, their handler. I think you guys are going to do so great against the Leather Lads. Now in this form of wrestling it’s less about taking your opponent down and more about getting your opponent off,” Julian said as they walked. With one hand already around Gronk’s waist, he grabbed Tom’s enormous shelf with the other and pulled him into his arm. He slid his hands beneath Tom’s speedo and began to slide a finger in and out. Until this point, Tom had still been putting up a fight. But the pleasure he was feeling now was unlike anything he’d felt with any of the women he’d been with. He arched his back pushing Julian’s finger deeper into him as Julian slipped in a second finger. All thoughts of sleeping on the couch dissolved as he started to fantasize about the different things him and his former teammates would be doing each night.

Walking with both men pressed into him, he said, “Dean was even telling me about a new idea where you would work together against the other wrestler’s handler, trying to get them off before the other team. You two versus Dean, while I go up against Seth and Brad.”

The men all arrived at the camera set for their upcoming match to find the other wrestlers were already mid photo shoot. Dean Ambrose stood there with his leather clad twinks, Seth Rollins and Brad Maddox.

“Oh yeah, we are definitely doing the handler match,” Julian said, his eyes focused on Brad’s perky little tush.

“Agreed,” Tommy said, his mouth watering at Dean’s broad shoulders.

#muscle theft #jock to twink #twinkification #The Procedure #butt growth #straight to gay #fan fiction #my work

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darkarfs · 3 years

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the worst movie tie-ins in the history of wrestling

Wrestling is stupid, and will show its ass at the mere mention of cross-promotion, especially when it comes to movies, which is it's cooler older brother that can get away with a lot more. Hell, the 2nd ever SummerSlam's main event, in 1989, was Hulk Hogan facing the main villain, Tiny Lister as Zeus (RIP), from the film they were both in, No Holds Barred. So wrestling's always wanted a piece of that. So... - Army of the Dead Let's just get this one out of the way. Here's the thing; I thought the WrestleMania Backlash's card was fucking perfect...except for this weird business. WMB MIGHT've been the best show of the pandemic (hot take) were it not for making sure we sell Big Dave's big zombie heist movie. If they had just kept some of the guys in zombie makeup on the Thunderdome's webcam footage, that would have been borderline charming. But instead, the Miz (who was WWE champion 3 months ago, don't forget) and Damien Priest (who they're making WWE's pop-culture liaison so far on the main roster, for some reason) had to sell for zombies in a lumberjack match. If this was the first ever wrestling show you watched with a loved one who had never watched wrestling or hadn't since like, the end of the Attitude Era, would you for a second want them to stick around after Miz and Morrison get, for all intents and purposes, kayfabe killed and eaten, and then watch Damien Priest shoot the logo at the ceiling? My money's on "no." - Shaft Speaking of the Attitude Era, anytime someone tells you that wrestling was cooler in that 3-year time frame, point them to the June 15th of 2000 episode of SmackDown, where a storyline that ran throughout the show followed Patterson and Briscoe through New York City to find Crash Holly and his Hardcore Title. Now, I admit parts of this are kinda funny, like Briscoe just wanting to give up and find a "gen-yoo-WINE New York hot dawg!" That's fun! And who does Crash Holly run into but none other than Shaft, and his woman, the only one who understands this complicated man, John Shaft. So, we have real Samuel L. Jackson, playing fake John Shaft, talking to real/fictional Crash Holly, and man is it weird. Anyway, Shaft agrees to be Crash's bodyguard for the night, and he slaps around Patterson and Briscoe in a nightclub. After all, what better way to get across how cool and badass a character is than having him knock around the fucking Stooges? - The Wrestler Well, this is complicated. The Wrestler, starring ancient wooden lion Mickey Rourke, is a somber tale about an industry that, in its heyday, left people physically spent, washed-up and addicted to adrenaline at best, and dead at worst. It famously moved Roddy Piper to tears because he recognized what destruction and brokenness the industry once left in its wake. Which is why it's super-weird that WWE jumped at the chance to promote maybe the bleakest possible look at their world in 2009, and did so by having Chris Jericho smack the shit out of three old wrestlers at WrestleMania 25, including Roddy Piper. And then have Rourke jump into the ring, wearing his "do you want to take peyote in the desert?" starter kit and bring out his amateur boxing chops. Tonally, it's just really bleak. Like if the creator of Super Size Me screened the premiere at the world's biggest McDonald's. - Bride of Chucky Poor Rick Steiner. You didn't deserve this. You're the sane Steiner. They shouldn't have made you talk to the puppet. So, WCW was heading into Halloween Havoc 1998, and after years of stomping all over the WWF in the ratings, the wheels had come off, and dramatically. Like, all at once. Like the car in the Blues Brothers. To boost PPV buys, they spent a fortune bringing in the Ultimate Warrior to rekindle a feud with Hulk Hogan, mostly by hiding in his fucking mirror. And the Steiner Brothers, one of the best teams of the early 90s, had been feuding with one another since Scott turned on his at SuperBrawl. What was the best way to build hype around this match at Halloween Havoc? Why, to have Rick get into a war of words - and lose - to Chucky. Yes.

Serial killer doll voiced by Brad Dourif, and it's so sad. Chucky cusses Rick out while Rick challenges the fucking doll to a fight, which is promptly ignored (Chucky's video segment is pre-recorded, and you can tell because he starts talking about 3 times in 3 minutes while Rick's mid-promo and missing his cues to stop) and then is made fun of. And all the while, people were probably wondering "what's going on on Vince's show?" and the answer is...that was the episode of Raw where Austin fills Vince's Corvette with cement, which is slightly more badass than being teased by a puppet. - The Goods Here's the thing: Raw is, right now, a bad show. It is bad TV. It's been bad for a while now. And as bad as it is right now, it's still not as fuck-awful as it was in 2009, aka the Age of the Guest Hosts (which, in kayfabe, was given to us by Donald J. Trump, so blame that ambulatory Nazi scrotum for one more thing, he's certainly earned it). For those of you fortunate enough to not be watching what was objectively unwatchable at the time - and hell, I sure as shit wasn't checking in very often - from mid-2009 to around mid-2010, a celebrity would be the special guest host of Monday Night Raw, often to promote a TV show or movie, and it was nearly all horribly-written, cheesy wank. Imagine if every week was the week of the zombie attack at Backlash. That's what it was like. Bob Barker was funny. The Muppets were good. And THAT'S the end of the list. MacGruber coming out to blow up R-Truth made me want to fall on a knife. The A-Team coming out to beat up Virgil was fucking awful. Go straight to fucking HELL, the Three Stooges, Dennis Miller, the reverend Al Sharpton, the 2010 Pittsburgh Steelers, Don Johnson and Jon Heder, the poor entire cast of Hot Tub Time Machine...and then there's Piven. Jeremy Piven. He showed up with Ken Jeong to promote a movie no one remembers...called the Goods. He stunk up several segments, infamously called SummerSlam "the Summer Fest" and then got roughed up by John Cena. Wrestling's the worst. Stop watching. And many did. For a looooooong time. - Robocop 2 This one's infamous, so I'll keep it brief. Robocop 2 came out in 1990, and goddamn, I don't know how much money the producers threw at WCW, but it was enough for them to rebrand an entire PPV "Capitol Combat: the Return of Robocop" and marketed the entire thing around the fancy metallic gentleman. The branding really made it seem like Robert Cop was old friends with the promotion, and indeed, old friends with Sting. Makes sense; two big, heroic idiots running on BASIC. He had been feuding with the Four Horsemen, who locked him in a cage at ringside. Out comes Robocop, called completely straight by Jim Ross, who rips the cage door off his hinges, and then leaves. An accumulated 85 seconds of screen time. Totally worth being the centerpiece of this PPV! But a little context as to why WCW fans hated it so much: 1989, the year before, was regarded by WCW fans as one of the best in company history. The era that gave us stuff like Chi-Town Rumble and the still-very-much-lauded peak of the Steamboat/Flair feud. To go from that to Robocop was seen as a bit of a slap in the face, because WCW was always seen as the more traditional "wrasslin'" company and was never into cheesy pop-culture crossovers, which is why the last one...is all the funnier.

- Ready To Rumble First of all, those dumbasses at Turner had to give Michael Buffer - who they still had on retainer - around $350,000 just to use that title, because he owns the trademark to that phrase. Strike 127 million, capitalism, that a guy gets to own a phrase and gets paid an obscene amount when he or anyone else uses it. Secondly, I initially wasn't going to do movies where the promotion itself is producing the movie, or oh holy HELL would See No Evil and the infamous May 19 shit be on here. But unlike See No Evil, this had a hand in killing a decades-old wrestling promotion, so it feels weird to not include it. On April 7th, 2000, bad movie Ready To Rumble was released, a film about two hapless dorks trying to help Oilver Platt, aka the lawyer from the West Wing, become WCW World Heavyweight Champion. Two weeks later, to promote the movie, they made David Arquette, the lead actor in the movie, the WCW World Heavyweight Champion. He pinned Eric Bischoff, who wasn't the champion, of course, in a match where he was teamed with Diamond Dallas Page, his best pal and the company's top babyface at the time, but who is also one of the villains in the film to make it extra confusing for the mainstream casual audience the movie was made to attract. And, to be fair, Arquette didn't want to do it, NO ONE really wanted to do it, and it tanked viewership for WCW once and for all. At the very least, David took his payday from the wrestling appearances and the film and gave it to the families of Owen Hart, Brian Pillman and to Darren Drozdov, who had been paralyzed from the neck down in a wrestling match the previous year.

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xxisxxisxxis · 4 years

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Shining Star | Part Two

[Axl Rose x OC]

Words: 3.1k

Warning(s): Explicit language, mentions of suicide

Tag list: @teller258316 @reigns420 @xpoisonousrosesx @oskea93 @blowinmeupwithherlove @redlipscrystalskies14 @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @sublimeprincesswasteland

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

"Pretty as a picture." I say to myself, swiping lipstick across my lips in the bathroom mirror before I click the tube shut and make sure my hair looks good.

My stomach churns at the thought of seeing Tommy...and Vince.

I haven't spoken a word to Vince since he got Tami pregnant a year and a half ago, and I haven't spoken to Tommy since he leapt out of my bedroom window after 3 minutes of awkward sex.

"Do you fuck all of your friends?" My mother's words come back to bite me in the ass as I groan out in frustration.

The only plus to any of this is that I'll get to hang out with Viv.

There. Viv. Just focus on Vivian.

I leave the bathroom and glance around to see if I see any familiar faces.

Nope.

I pull the skirt of my dress down a little and rub my lips together, people passing left and right, looking either too drunk to be bothered or too busy.

"Tansy?" I hear a confused voice and look straight ahead, seeing Vivian by the payphone.

"Hey!" I reply excitedly, rushing to her as fast as I can, being careful not to trip over my feet adorned in red heels.

Vivian Sixx—Kinston at that point—had a ballet scholarship to Juilliard, never missed a Sunday church service, and was one of those annoyingly gorgeous girls that genuinely thought they were ugly. She couldn't stand her red hair because she was teased in middle school and called "firecrotch," she hated her freckles and her height because she'd been compared to a giraffe--"tall as shit with brown spots"--and the fact her mom was a batshit crazy Jesus lunatic never helped matters…but that stuff was all in her head because after middle school, guys looked at her differently, Jesus-lover and all. She saw annoying traits, but most people saw legs a mile long, a unique hair color that stood out in the sea of bleach blonde, freckles that framed emerald green eyes, and a heart as kind and beautiful inside as she was on the outside.

She's always said I was the most gorgeous woman she'd ever met, but she is, to me, the most stunning.

She didn't have to try to get anybody's attention, she walked in a room and she had it--so much so that Matt Sorum called her "Fire Woman" after The Cult song because he claimed that's the first thing that came to mind when he first saw her walking back stage at his first gig with Guns N' Roses. "She could give me the fucking clap and I'd kiss her feet for it." He told me, his facial expression mimicking someone who'd been struck by lightening twice…

People always looked at her like that but she rarely noticed because she'd be too busy looking up at Nikki with utter hearts in her eyes, but we'll get into that later.

"What are you doing here?" She asks me curiously.

"Vince called me and wanted me to come." I explain and she raises her brows.

"Vince?" She asks and I nod. "The same Vince that cheated on you multiple times Freshman year? And your entire relationship?"

"It's been, what, four years?" I ask, in reference to how long it's been since he and I started dating. "Maybe he's grown up a little." I suggest and she just clears her throat, cueing the hollering of an angry girl.

"Fuck you! Piece of shit! Motherfucker!" She shouts, the sound of her hitting Vince gets louder and she stomps down the hall as he follows after her, continuously trying to get her attention by saying "babe" repeatedly.

"My pants! Babe!" He's fully in sight now as she stomps off...and he's fully naked.

"Fuck you!" She calls back to him, leaving him behind.

"I fucking love those pants." He whines, disappointed, cupping his dick.

"Your swimsuit parts are out." Vivian tells him, and he and I make contact over her shoulder, my nerves tensing up anxiously as he looks at me with a grin.

"Hey, Tans." He says to me, about to come closer but Vivian stops him.

"Go put some clothes on." She orders to him and he rolls his eyes, turning and walking away, his butt shining as he leaves. "You had sex with that." She reminds me and I frown slightly.

"Yeah, he hasn't changed a bit has he?" I ask her and she shakes her head a little.

"He's gotten worse." She states. "Alright, c'mon, let's go see Tommy." She takes my hand and leads me to where he is, my heart nearly beating out of my chest.

How awkward is this going to be?

We turn the corner and see him and two other guys standing in their street clothes, and when Tommy sees me, all my nerves dissipate because he completely makes me forget our awkward sex never even happened.

"Tansy fucking Reilen!" He exclaims excitedly as I walk to him to hug him.

He leans down to reach my 5'3" height and wraps his arms tightly around me.

"Hey, Tommy!" I reply, just as happy.

This is the first time he, Vivian, and I, will be hanging out together...Viv's been having to hangout with us separately because we've been avoiding each other for the most part. I guess we don't have to, anymore.

He releases me, immediately turning to the ball of teased, jet black hair.

"This is Nikki," he informs me, "the band's bassist."

Hazel eyes--nearly green--look down at me behind his hair, traveling down my face, to my chest, down my legs, and back up again, the tiniest, mischievous smirk on his lips, and I raise my brow a tiny bit…

Trouble. Trouble. Trouble. Trouble. Is exactly what Nikki was, and it was all he and I could get ourselves into for years to follow.

"And this is Tansy." Tommy tells Nikki, oblivious to how he's looking at me.

"Nice to meet you." I tell Nikki.

"Yeah." He replies.

"And Mick, our guitarist." Tommy says next, nodding to the shorter man who's also got jet black hair.

"Hi." I say to him.

He just gives a small smile and mumbles, "hey."

"He's a little quiet but when you get to know him he opens up." Tommy says to me, quietly as Vince reappears with clothes on. "We were about to head to the rainbow," he starts next, his eyes flickering to Viv. "If someone's willing to stay out late."

"Fine." Vivian doesn't argue, sighing out.

"Hallelujah. Thank fuckin' God." Vince pipes, sliding his arm around my shoulder, making me roll my eyes.

The entire time to the Rainbow, Vivian and Nikki are constantly back and forth, tearing each other new assholes and going for each other's throats. I don't know what beef they have with each other but it's brutal and borderline sex fueled.

Once we get to the bar and grill, I drag Viv to the bathroom with me so I can touch up my makeup.

"So…" I start, looking in the mirror, "...have you lost your virginity yet?"

"No." She says it as if she's slightly offended.

"Oh."

"Why?"

"It's just…" I start but quickly decide that it'll just piss her off, probably. "Nothing."

"Tansy." She sighs, irritated. "What is it?"

"Nothing. I just thought you and that Nikki guy have messed around." I shrug and she looks like she's seen a ghost.

"I—ew why would you think that? We haven't." She insists and I hold my hands up in surrender.

"I'm sorry, I just thought you had." I tell her.

"What makes you think we have?"

"There's a tension." The words are framed by a smirk and she widens her eyes.

"There is not a tension. There is so not a tension." She gets it out without laughing although I can tell she wants to. “We argue. All the time. He thinks I’m a self-righteous prude and I think he’s the spawn of Satan. If there’s a tension, it’s because we hate each other.”

"You don't have to like someone to have sex with them." I inform her, speaking from experience of the guys who've had sex with me without giving a damn, and me having sex with guys I didn't necessarily like just to make them happy. "I really like him for you, though. You get all riled up and firey when he's around."

"Oh, please." She rolls her eyes.

“I just met the guy and I can tell he has you acting different. You used to be so quiet and shy around people you don’t really know, now you’re jumping in to conversations just to piss him off and prove him wrong.”

“Because I don’t like him.” She shakes her head. “And he doesn’t like me. That’s where the tension comes from. See? It’s full-circle.”

"Hate-sex is always an option." I suggest.

"Do not even start." She scolds me, pointing her finger.

"What? It gets rid of all the aggression and ill feelings." I explain.

“So does their shows. Did you know they encourage people to get their feelings out during a show so they go home chilled out and not so uptight?” she tells me and I look at her, not even the slightest bit convinced. “And it works.”

“Yeah, until he gets off stage and then you get all hot and bothered.” I reply with a grin.

“I get hot because he’s Devil-Spawn and the heat from hell radiates off of him and I get bothered because he’s an arrogant idiot.”

“Or you like him and don’t know why you do so you displace your frustration and confusion on to him.” I shoot back. “I was honestly joking about the hate sex okay? I don’t want you to go jump in to bed with him if you don’t want to but you two were fighting like cats and dogs the whole time we were on our way here. I think you should try to let whatever kind of bravery he evokes in you come out in a way that’s not in the form of riled up anger or fiery hatred.” I recommend and she nods a little. “Now, c’mon because I have a slutty blonde waiting.”

That was the night Mötley Crüe was signed to Elektra records by rock-god signing Tom Zutat, who's responsible for record companies grasping ahold of a plethora of leather-patented hair metal douchebags that could make good music and snort their way through long enough power rails of coke that once they reach the end of white powder without flinching, China's on the other side. But you want to know a secret? It was all bullshit. Every person I've met in that rock scene, you know, the ones that despised the term "hair metal" yet teased their hair two feet above their heads and played heavy metal? Yeah, them. Every single one of them had this "I was made for this shit" attitude.

Some of them nearly put bullets through their head, OD'd, hung themselves, turned their cars on and locked themselves in their garage...even the ones that hadn't purposely tried to take themselves out either almost pushed it too far and died accidentally from too much booze or drugs or vehicle accidents, or did push it too far.

They weren't made for it.

Nobody's fucking made for millions of people wanting a piece of them every single night, management running them to their grave for more money, dealers keeping them numb, all their relationships just exploding in their faces, all of their "friends" wanting more and more and more.

They thought they were made for it because when someone gets a taste of what they decide the universe or God or whoever or whatever destined for them to become, they take it and run with it without reading the fine print.

They see the fame without the lack of privacy and hangers-on.

They see the fans without the people who hate their guts and make it known.

They see the money without the gold diggers.

They see the excess without the high risk that comes with taking advantage of having everything with the snap of their fingers.

They see the glutton without the punishment.

Until they're standing on the railing of the balcony of their Hollywood penthouse, their best friend trying to talk them down while the police are on their way.

And then of course when they do turn up dead by suicide, people talk their typical, "how awful, they killed themselves in their mansion, surrounded by their expensive furniture, wearing their expensive clothes, with millions—possibly billions—in their bank account, how sad for them, boohoo."

As someone who's been dirt broke, to the point of getting my water cut off and having to shower at a friend's house, but then growing up to have more money than I knew what to do with aside from blow it on drugs? Money doesn't buy happiness, jerkoffs. It can buy distractions to buffer pain and suffering, sure, but once the high wears off, or that new car loses its luster, or that new house starts to feel fucking empty, all while that wall full of awards and plaques and magazine posters cementing your fame and worth and stake in the industry you sold your soul for just reminds you that you don't even recognize who the hell you are anymore and nothing can change that...you get fucking depressed. Hate to say it. Hate to be the bearer of bad news, that even though you're poor as shit and are depressed as shit that even if you had money and fame you'd still be fucking sad. But I'd rather tell you the truth than sell you the fallacy that me and everybody else I was friends with bought, that landed every single one of us in situations where we felt we had no other way except to just off ourselves all while remembering when we were stupid enough to proudly say: "I was made for this."

People are made for this like Matthew Trippe replaced Nikki Sixx, which—if you want the truth—is complete bullshit.

“He said we could possibly score a five album deal, Viv, why aren’t you happy about this? I thought you wanted us to get signed?” Tommy asks Vivian as she slings her keys across the guys' shitty living room, pissed beyond measure.

“You just told me you were dropping out of school, Tommy! We are so close to graduating, can’t you just wait?!”

“No, I can’t! I can’t just wait because what I wanted is happening and I need to focus on the band right now more than ever!” He argues while motioning to Nikki and Vince, who, like me, are being smart and staying near the door incase we need to get out of sight once Vivian and Tommy kill each other.

“Your education should be your main focus, at least until you graduate! You are so close to being done, Tommy, why can’t you just—“

“Because I don’t give a fuck about school, Vivian! What I am passionate about doesn’t require a diploma, and I’m sorry if me dropping out makes you feel like I’m leaving you behind or whatever the fuck you feel, but I’m not sorry for wanting to focus on my main priority!”

“What I’m hearing is that I wasted hours of my time throughout school trying to tutor you and help you all for you to throw it away on the idea of being some hot-shot rockstar with girls and drugs and booze—”

“Oh, my God, you act like you would have had better things to do with that wasted time!” He sounds like he already knows he's gonna lose the argument while Vivian just rolls her jaw. “And it’s not a fucking idea, it’s fucking reality and you’re only mad because you have no control over it!”

“I’m mad because we talked about this and everything we agreed on, everything we promised each other, is absolute void to you now that it’s actually happening!”

“Shit changes, Viv, people change! What I considered important junior year is completely different than what I consider important now.” He calms down, sighing.

“We agreed we would both graduate high school and I could either put off college or drop out if I needed to...” she trails off, her voice shaking slightly with oncoming tears, making me feel bad for her. “That was our plan to avoid this from happening. To avoid you leaving me behind.” Now it's crystal clear why she's freaking out over them being offered a record deal. “You considered me important junior year when you came up with that plan. When you promised me you wouldn’t go on to bigger things without me and forget me. And now...” She takes a step back, while Tommy attempts to walk to her.

“Viv, I didn’t mean it like that.” He tries to tell her.

“No, you’re right.” she replies, her body shaking a little. “Shit changes.” I raise my brow because I've never heard her curse before. “People change.” She keeps on. “Glad this is happening now, though, so I don’t waste any more time on a completely different page than you, Tommy.” Her voice cracks a little and she grabs her keys quickly.

“Viv—“ Tommy tries to grab her arm as she heads to the door but she snatches away from him. “Fuck you.” she cracks, her voice barely coming out as tears spill over her lashes.

Nikki and Vince step aside to let her leave all while I contemplate following her, but if I know Vivian, I know she likes to think about things when she's upset, rather than just talk them out with someone. Which is the only time she likes to be alone.

She just slams the door on us, and Tommy.

Most definitely wouldn't be the last time she did that.

"Tommy, are you—"

"—I'm goin' home." He grumbles, grabbing his keys, and me and Nikki and Vince all look at each other.

"Tommy, you are home?" Nikki reminds him.

"I'm stayin' with my folks so I can vent to my sister because she's the only one who knows Viv good enough to know she's being fuckin' unreasonable." He states.

"I barely know her and I can tell you she's unreasonable." Nikki scoffs, earning a glare. "Sorry, man." He mumbles in return.

"Bye." Tommy says, closing the door behind him.

"Well...I'm gonna go find a chick to fuck." Vince says, stretching.

"You got one right here." Nikki chuckles looking at me and I raise my brows.

"Not since I knocked Tami up." Vince reads my mind and I nod.

"Exactly." I reply.

"Who?" Nikki asks.

"Nobody. Don't wait up." He tells us, opening the door and leaving, too, more than likely heading to the strip club down the street.

"So, like, how old are you?" Nikki asks.

"Why?"

He just gets a shit eating grin on his lips.

#shining star

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gothpanda · 4 years

Text

A Little Bit of Attitude Ch.23: I’m So Stupid

WORD COUNT: 5.9K

A/N: Jesus I had a rough week Enjoy this chapter!!

WARNINGS: Language, Drug use, aggressive nature

TAGS: @madamsixx

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Previous/Next

July 23, 1985

Sammi stared down at her hands, tap anxiously on the green table of the booth she sat in. The diner was running slow for a Wednesday, only a handful of people spread out in the restaurant. Sammi kept looking at her watch then to the door, reconsidering even being here. A waitress would come from time to time to see if Sammi needed anything, only getting turned down. Maybe Sammi shouldn't have come so early. The glass doorbell ring made Sammi's ear perk up like a fox, looking straight ahead of her. Except instead of Vince, it was an older man with a small happy child who had a smile on their face. Sammi scuffed to herself, beginning to bite the nail on her thumb. It wasn't until she heard the bell ring again that Sammi saw Vince's face, standing there without knowing what to do. He scratched the back of his head, slowly walking up to the booth. Sammi swallowed away her nerves, hugging her body for comfort. Sliding into the booth, Vince took off his jean jacket and gave a small smile to his ex-girlfriend.

"Hi," said Vince, holding his hands together.

"Hey, Vince, how have you been?" asked Sammi, taking a sip of water.

"Not much different from the last time you saw me. Sharise is busting my ball for no reason," complained Vince. Sammi stayed quiet from the sound of her name, looking at her nails. "So, you wanted to talk finally?"

"Yeah, I think I've had enough time being a bitch to you," said Sammi, reaching inside her purse. She pulled out a folded sheet of a notebook paper, bullet point thoughts all scribbled down to a mess. Vince scowled at Sammi, raising a questionable eyebrow at the girl.

"You have a list of shit?" asked Vince, wrinkling his nose.

"Yes, because I rather read off a list then run off emotions," Sammi said, scanning over what she wrote down. "As I said, I've had enough time being a bitch to you,"

"I wouldn't say a bitch. It's not like I didn't deserve any of it. Except maybe that bottle to my head," joked Vince. Sammi took a deep breath, laying the paper flat on the table for even Vince to see some thoughts. Sammi bit her lip, feeling her heart beating so fast in her chest, and she couldn't help calm it down. After a bit of silence, Sammi looked Vince right in the eyes that she loved so dearly.

"First off, when did you two meet exactly?" asked Sammi, swallowing the knot in her throat. Vince rubbed the sweat off his jeans, coughing to clear his throat.

"It was back in May when Tropicana was brand new. It was one of the nights you wanted to stay at your parents' place, I met up with some guys to drink with and ended up there," answered Vince, grabbing a sugar packet to keep his hands busy.

Sammi nodded, "And when you met her, did you two immediately hook up?"

"No! No. She just gave me a lap dance and kept flirting with me all night, but we didn't kiss or anything," replied Vince, biting his lip.

"So when did you two exactly have sex? Because I doubt you got her pregnant off a one time moment in August," Sammi bit the inside of her cheek, looking out the window to compose herself from any tears.

"July, I guess. I don't remember the exact fucking date. I just know that it was one of the nights you weren't feeling like going out," explained Vince, dropping his head into his hands' palm. Sammi shook her head, dabbing the corner of her eye to catch any tears from falling.

"So it went on for months? You had sex with her multiple times?" asked Sammi with a stern voice. Vince nodded sheepishly. "And you still fucking went back even after you got her pregnant. Then you got mad at me for having a good time when you ditched me for her back at Purple Moon! Oh my god," gasped Sammi, covering her face in her hand then pushing away hair that fell out of place.

"I didn't ditch you for her! I didn't know. She didn't even know! We only had sex max five times when I got crossfaded; it meant nothing,"

"Clearly, if you acted as if you didn't do anything. I thought for almost a full year; you were such a great boyfriend. You made me feel so happy, and yet you were sitting on this lie. You were lying every day," uttered Sammi, looking straight into Vince's eyes with tears building up. "Why? Why weren't you happy with just me?"

Vince slumped in his seat, finally feeling the heartbreak he caused to Sammi. He could finally see the sadness that came from his mistakes. Vince only received anger from Sammi after everything. He received Sammi's attitude tenfold, the rudeness, and the foul language. Vince never saw Sammi cry from the pain he caused, not even the first time he fucked up. "I was happy with you," whispered Vince, feeling his cheek flush with embarrassment. "I just don't know when to say no, especially now being a big shot rockstar. Now, look at me. I'm a dad who killed his friend, and everyone hates me,"

"I should have never gotten mad at you that night outside of Rainbow. I guess… I would get mad at you for doing dumb shit because I kept making mistakes behind your back. I wanted you to stay the same perfect Samantha. The one who was always ahead of everyone with a kind smile on her face," expressed Vince, having some sort of courage to look right in Sammi's eye when he spoke to her.

"I'm not perfect, Vince, nor will I ever be. Just because I have a different life than you doesn't make me better or lesser than you," said Sammi, looking back down at the piece of paper.

When did they meet?

When did they first hook up?

Ask if he regrets anything.

Ask if he was ever going to tell me.

Talk about him moving on so fast.

Ask if he's okay

Admit, I'm sleeping with Nikki. Fuck that.

"I don't hate you. I want you to know that," admitted Sammi, folding the piece of paper in her hands, stuffing it back in her handbag. "Do you regret anything you've done to me?"

"Yes, I regret being a manwhore to you. You had a point even back then in the beginning," mumbled Vince. "Do you regret being with me? After all the shit I put you through," asked Vince. Sammi looked down at the table, pondering on her emotions to answer Vince. It was a thought she said to herself after everything. Sammi knew everything people go through has a purpose and a lesson. It was great to be with Vince, but now thinking how half of it being based on a sitting lie, it hurts even more.

"It's funny. I keep telling myself I should've just been cold to you guys when I saw you all, and maybe I'd be okay. I don't regret being with you because a lot of fun came from it. I just wish it didn't end like I expected," confessed Sammi, wiping away a single tear that came down her face.

"I'm sorry for hurting you. Do you know if you can ever forgive me?"

"I want to, but maybe let's wait a while,"

"I figured… I'm also sorry about being paranoid about Nikki. Guess I'm a hypocrite for assuming," said Vince, shaking his head like he was dumb to think such a thing. Sammi bit her lip, anxiously bouncing her leg under the table from the words Nikki. Sammi knew everyone would find out soon enough, but hearing Vince calling himself a hypocrite just made it harder ever to spill the secret.

"It's okay. I forgive you for that," Sammi bit her tongue, knowing damn well she was wrong in this department. Vince smiled at Sammi, feeling like he was going in the right direction with his favorite girl. "If you didn't get caught, were you ever going to tell me?"

Vince looked out for a moment, trying not to lie to make himself look good. "Yeah, I was. After stopping I kept thinking about it, but then more shit got into the mix," Sammi could see the pain in Vince's eyes from talking so much, realizing this is most likely the most, he's opened up in a long time.

"Vince… be honest with me. Are you okay? How have you been doing with everything?" asked Sammi, resisting the urge to hold Vince's hands from across the table. Vince let out a heavy breath, going back to messing with the sugar packet.

"No, I'm not. I have to be completely sober until my court date. Your brother and his bitch won't shut their fucking mouths about it. Sharise and I fight for everything. And I have no idea how to be a dad," admitted Vince, eyes looking defeated to Sammi.

"You haven't done drugs? Or drank?" Vince shook his head. "Since the incident?" Sammi asked again in disbelief of a sober Vince.

"Yeah. I have to go get tested each week. This has been the soberest I've been since I was 15," said Vince.

"Tommy and Nikki shouldn't be on your ass for being a responsible person. I'll yell at them to stop bothering you if you need me to," offered Sammi, reaching out to hold Vince's hands. Vince didn't protest, enjoying the tiny bit of affection he received that wasn't sexual. It was just the needed kindness he desperately craved.

"It's okay, Sammi. I'm a grown man, and I should do things on my own. Even if it means my own band hates me for it," answered Vince, gently rubbing his thumb on the back of Sammi's hand. Sammi looked down at their hands, smiling to herself but kept reminding she isn't really a single woman. "But I appreciate the offer. Since you're so smart, do you have any advice for being a dad, or can you do that for me also?" joked Vince, smirking at Sammi.

Sammi couldn't help but giggle with Vince's joke, feeling like everything was back to normal. "No, I don't. You're just going to have to talk to Sharise about being a dad. Also, isn't your daughter like a month old or something? You have time to get better," said Sammi.

"Skylar. Her name's Skylar," smiled Vince.

"That's a pretty name. I'm sure you will have enough time to be a better dad to Skylar," reassured Sammi, squeezing Vince's hands.

"Thank you. Listen, I really appreciate this. I miss being able to talk to someone my shit," said Vince. Sammi smiled at Vince, beginning to play with fingers and pop them as if the two were back to being the normal them. "I even miss you popping my fingers. I guess you really do take things for granted until they're gone,"

"As much as I love an open and meaningful Vince, did you just learn that shit in probation rehab or?" asked Sammi, cracking a smile that made Vince laugh.

"Yeah. Yeah, I fucking did," admitted Vince, laughing along with Sammi. "But hey, it's an improvement! am I right?"

"It definitely is an improvement for sure," said Sammi, relaxing back in the booth. The two held hands for longer than needed, reminiscing on the feeling from the pasts. Vince couldn't help to think of how this wasn't like Sharise. He and Sharise never had a moment of comfortable silence, even after the nights of sex. It felt fast-paced and no ounce of peace compared to how Sammi loved gentle moments. Those moments where Sammi would dance her finger on Vince's scalp, making him relax while watching tv. The moments of Vince hugging Sammi from behind as she studied hard in his office space, giving her any feeling of reassurance. Vince was beginning to remember how bad he ruined this good thing in his life. Sammi didn't know what to say or do, only kept close before leaving and going back to Nikki.

August 9, 1985

Los Angeles, California

Sammi and Athena strut down Hollywood Boulevard, smiling and laughing with the wind playing up in their hair. Sammi glanced down on her wrist, seeing her brand new watch read 3:30 in the afternoon. The day was beautiful for the boys to start their tour, wind cooling the California summer heat and not a cloud in the sky. The Bass sisters had a day off to surprise Tommy and the boys while they did soundcheck, everything feeling perfect for once. After a short walk from the public parking garage, Athena opened the Hollywood Pantages Theatre's massive doors. The roadies were pacing around at the front of the theatre, putting up a table of merchandise of shirts, posters, and records. Sammi glanced around the grand entrance with glee until her eyes fell on a woman and a brand new blonde baby in her arms. Sammi froze from a distance, Athena standing next to her sister to catch Sammi's eyes on Sharise standing with a tiny Skylar.

Sharise bounded Skylar in her arms, seeming tired and irritated all at the same time until finally noticing the Bass sisters look at her. She forced a smile to Sammi, slowly approaching them in the center of the entrance. Athena laced her arm around Sammi's, standing in as the protective sister she was. Sammi almost held her breath, couldn't keep her eyes off Skylar.

"Hi, Sammi. Hi, Athena. How have you girls been?" asked Sharise with a kind smile.

"We've been good, Sharise. How's being a new mama?" asked Sammi with no anger in her heart, smiling as if she was catching up with an old friend.

"Crazy. I had no idea how much one baby can be such a handful. It isn't easy when you feel like you're doing it alone," vented Sharise, smiling at Skylar look at Athena and Sammi in curiosity.

Sammi smiled at the baby. "Hi, Skylar! Aren't you just the prettiest little girl," cooed Sammi making Skylar laugh a bit.

"Vince isn't helping you?" asked Athena, frowning deep 11 lines between her brows.

"No, he tries but gives up and just looks at me to finish everything. He's also under a lot of stress with touring and his court date. I'm sure he vented to you about it," said Sharise to Sammi, pressing her lips hard together.

"Um… yeah, he did, but I told him to talk to you about it. You and Vince can help each navigate being brand new parents together," uttered Sammi, playing with her hands to ease the nerves.

"Thank you for trying. I don't think I'll see that happening anytime soon," mumbled Sharise, trying to keep Skylar from jumping out of her arms. For being two months old, she had the capability of moving around fast, almost like her daddy. It was cute to everyone but hard for Sharise to keep her still when necessary. Skylar's arms popped up wide from her little chest, reaching out for Sammi to hold her. Sharise tried to make Skylar stop moving, but it only resulted in Skylar letting out small cries.

"I think she wants Sammi to hold her?" questioned Athena, switching glances between the two girls.

"Oh no, you don't have to, Sammi. I get it if it's uncomfortable," offered Sharise.

"Honestly, it's not. I'm completely okay holding little Skylar," said Sammi, reaching out to hold the baby, slowly switching between her and Sharise. Sammi bounced Skylar in her arms, seeing a bright smile that almost resembled Vince's. Skylar rested her head on Sammi's shoulder, feeling very at peace in Sammi's even though she was a complete stranger. Athena and Sharise gawked in shock at the baby's reaction, seeing how gentle and kind Sammi appeared.

"Wow. You're the first person she's felt comfortable with that wasn't family," admitted Sharise, not knowing if she favored this or not. Sharise knew she was the other woman who got in between Sammi and Vince, but she wasn't used to the kindness she was receiving.

"I guess babies just love me. Jesus, you're gonna look just like your dad. I can already see it," said Sammi to Skylar in a cute voice, making her smile. Sharise slightly shaking her head at Sammi's statement.

"You were on your way to see Vince or?" asked Athena.

"Yeah, since he's gonna be on tour, I thought I'd visit family in Nebraska. I really don't like being alone in that big house," said Sharise, fixing her hair.

"Well, in that case, let's see them before they ditch this place," announced Athena, heading right to the theatre doors.

"You can keep carrying her if you want. She really likes you," said Sharise, following Athena's footsteps. Sammi followed behind with Skylar quietly resting on her hip, almost falling asleep. The theatre was ginormous, having an upstairs for extra people to sit. The album cover was drawn big on the center stage as roadies continued to set up amps and instruments. The three girls could see Vince sat in the front row seats, isolated from the guys on the stage. Sammi could tell Nikki appeared more irritated than before, sipping on his soda with a sulking stare. Tommy and Mick talking among themselves, soon seeing the women come closer. As the girls reached the stage, Sammi stood right in front of Vince, smiling mischievously.

"Surprise! I have your child," said Sammi, Skylar noticing her dad seated down in front of them now. She began cooing in excitement, reaching out for Vince as he stood up from the red velvet chair.

"Uhh, why are you here? And why do you have my child?" asked Vince, lifting his daughter out of Sammi's arms, giving her a kiss on the forehead.

"What? I can't come to visit my brother and friends at work? Also, Skylar wanted me!" said Sammi, crossing her arms, still smiling pridefully while Sharise stood right by her. Vince switched looks between the two women, unable to say anything that came into his head. 'They're acting like friends?' thought Vince, also seeing the confused looks from the rest of Motley.

"Skylar has found someone to like that isn't related to us. Isn't that nice for our little girl?" said Sharise, showing her annoyance for Vince already after a few words. Athena could see the tension needing to be cut with a knife, stepping over to Sammi to grab her hand and watch this drama from a distance. Sammi smiled at the couple, heading towards Nikki, Tommy, and Mick, who also wanted to see the show. Nikki shook his head at Sharise and Vince, Sammi boosting herself up to sit right next to him on stage. Athena standing right by Mick, who strummed on his guitar.

"Is this bring your fucking girlfriend to work day?" whispered Nikki to everyone, Tommy giggling.

"Wish I had a girlfriend," mumbled Mick with sadness, sipping the water bottle he always carried. Athena softly reassured Mick, placing a delicate hand on his shoulder.

"I know Mick, I know," muttered Nikki, seeing Sammi staring right at him with a scowl. "Can I help you?" asked Nikki, getting closer to Sammi's face, making her break into an almost smile.

"Who else's girlfriends have been coming in today?" asked Sammi, raising an eyebrow in question. Nikki smirked and chuckled, hinting as to who else has come to the venue without exposing them. He really did like reaching the edge of getting caught. Sammi could see Sharise grab Skylar out of Vince's arms in the short distance, saying a monotone goodbye and turning on her heels to the door. Vince didn't hold back his somber face, hearing Skylar cries echo throughout the theater. Sammi caught Vince's eyes, giving a sympathetic smile to reassure him. Vince just stayed in his seat to sulk.

"Heather came today before going to pick up her parents. I'm having dinner with them tonight before we head out on Saturday after this show," said Tommy, stealing a sip of Mick's water bottle. "Where… I will propose…" mumbled Tommy, coughing. Athena and Sammi whipping their heads fast with big eyes at their older brother.

"You're proposing?!" yelled out the Bass sisters in unison. Everyone in the building turned their heads to the sisters, beginning to eavesdrop. Sammi jumped off the stage, standing right in front of Tommy with arms crossed, ready to lecture him as if he were a child. Vince came up from his seat, almost slamming against Sammi with his jaw dragging on the floor.

"You wanna get married?!" asked Vince frantically, frowning at the drummer.

"How long have you two even been dating? Trust me, it's not been long!" said Athena, restraining herself from raising her voice.

"I know, but I feel confident about Heather! Mama and Dad love her, which is great, and look how nice she is! You guys always know I wanted to get married to someone I love," explained Tommy, dropping to his feet to the ground and standing up for himself.

"Dude, the last girl you wanted to marry called me a cunt, and I almost punched her. Why can't you just wait a year?" expressed Sammi, frowning with deep concern. Tommy scratched his head, looking down at feet with everyone staring at him.

"It's different this time. I swear it really is and come on I know you girls love her too. Can I just please have my two favorite people be on my side? Please?" begged Tommy, smiling down at his sisters. Athena and Sammi exchanged looks of worry melting away with the love they had for their brother.

"Fine, you're right. If you're thrilled with Heather, then I guess we should be too. Right, Sammi?" asked Athena, nudging Sammi with her elbow.

"Yeah. She is pretty nice," mumbled Sammi, smiling at Tommy. Tommy hugged Athena and Sammi so tight it almost made Sammi regret being sweet. Sammi pushed away from the group hug, seeing Vince on the verge of wanting to speak to her. Nikki grabs Mick's water bottle, jumping off the edge of the stage to hang an arm around Vince's shoulders.

"Want some water, Vince? Made a mint too?" asked Nikki, chuckling at Vince's discomfort of being sober. Sammi rolled her eyes, pushing Nikki's arm off of Vince, gaining a smile from the blonde and a scowl from Nikki.

"Leave him alone, Nikki. You shouldn't be tempting him like that," scolded Sammi.

"Why? He's a big boy. If he wants to break he little sobriety that's on him," said Nikki, poking Vince in the cheek only to get his hand slapped away. Sammi shook her head, narrowing eyes to Nikki, becoming peeved on the way he was behaving.

"You're such an asshole, Nikki," spat Sammi, looping her arm onto Vince's and pulling him away from everyone. "Come on, Vin, I need a smoke already," Vince didn't object to Sammi, surprised but still smiling at the gesture. Nikki stared at the two walkings off, mouth opened slightly as if he was the one who should be offended.

"Oh, so you two are friends now?" shouted Athena. Tommy looked in disbelief, but with some sort of happiness that the two were friendly again.

"Yeah!" yelled Sammi, pushing open the doors and heading straight to the main doors. Sammi let go of Vince's arm, searching in her purse for her pack of cigarettes until Vince held up two cigarettes. She happily took for herself, leaning towards her own lighter and passing it to Vince. She inhaled for a moment, feeling the smoke relax her until Sammi blew it out into the wind. Sammi side-eyed Vince seeing him smile with glee while smoke aside her.

"What's that smile for?" asked Sammi with a smirk on her lips

"Just find it enjoyable when you call out people on rare occasions. Such a loudmouth for such a tiny body," said Vince.

"You could say you're welcome to get Nikki off your back," suggested Sammi, shrugging her shoulders while keeping the same energy.

"Thank you. I highly appreciate it," smiled Vince. "I swear I don't know how I'm going to be able to be on a bus with those guys, mainly Nikki,"

"I'm sure it won't be as bad as you think," reassured Sammi, stepping on the small cigarette bud.

"Really? I'm sober while the rest of my band is too high or drunk to know what's going on. I mean, look at our album, it's crap!" vented Vince.

"It can't be crap if it's doing so well," said Sammi.

"Have you ever listened to the album? The whole thing?" asked Vince, seeing Sammi shake her head. "Okay, so what songs have you heard?"

"Home Sweet Home…" muttered Sammi.

"The only good original song plus the cover we did. That's it! Nikki was too high to write actual good songs,"

"He's written with coke in his system before, and it's been fine. It's just one album that you don't like. Pretty sure every one band member in any band has felt like that," said Sammi, moving to be right next to Vince on the wall. Vince frowned at Sammi, giving her pity on her oblivion.

"Sam, Nikki's been doing more than just coke lately. You haven't seen the tiny tracks on his arm?" asked Vince, raising an eyebrow.

"What?" questioned Sammi, blinking rapidly.

"He's been shooting up. He's doing heroin and mixing coke and something else with Tommy. You really haven't noticed?" said Vince, stepping on his cigarette to get another one. Sammi stared at Vince in disbelief, not wanting to think of Nikki going back to heroin after being together. After he promised he wasn't going to do it again.

"I'm an idiot," whispered Sammi, dropping her head into the palm of her hand. "So he never stopped? Even after the studio incident?" Vince shook his head to Sammi, only making her huff.

"Did he tell you he was going to stop?" asked Vince, taking a drag from his cigarette. Sammi nodded, looking down at the ground. "And when did he tell you that?"

"Back in February. I went to his house and tried talking to him after what happened to you. I flushed the rest of the shit he had in his room," confessed Sammi, looking at Vince with sad eyes.

"Clearly, that didn't stop him. Please don't tell me he got angry at you for flush his drugs down the toilet," said Vince, turning his body to face Sammi.

"He grabbed my wrist really hard but apologized after. That was it. God, I'm so stupid for believing him!" yelled Sammi, feeling her cheeks turn red from embarrassment. Vince sighed, stepping on his cigarette, slowly wrapping his arm around Sammi's shoulders. Sammi didn't reject the hug, her arm finding Vince's waist and resting her head on his chest. Vince rubbed Sammi's arm for comfort, resting his chin on the top of his former girlfriend's head.

"It's not your fault Sammi for having a big heart. You just have to realize you're talking to four men who don't listen to anything. Even if we know we're doing something completely wrong," calmly said Vince, being the one to get reassurance for once in a long time.

"So what, you guys are just gonna slowly kill yourselves?"

"Look, you can try as hard as you want to get to Nikki because I know he mildly listens to you, but don't be sad if nothing happens," said Vince, letting go of Sammi and digging his hands in his jean pockets. "And try not to flush his drugs again. I wouldn't want to beat his ass for hurting you," Vince pinched Sammi's cheek, making her smile like always, not knowing if they should head back to soundcheck.

"Okay… I'll take your advice," mumbled Sammi, giving Vince a proper hug.

"You'll what?" asked Vince with a cunning smile, squeezing Sammi with his arms. Sammi began laughing out loud to Vince, trying her best to break out of the hug.

"I said I'll take your advice! Jesus, stop squeezing me!" ordered Sammi, breaking to giggles as Vince still kept a tight grip on the small girl. "What is it gonna take for you to let me go!?" asked Sammi, almost falling back.

"Say I'm your best friend who's right for once," shouted Vince, leaning forward to make Sammi bend backward, his laughs muffled against Sammi's shoulder.

"No!" Vince squeezed Sammi a bit harder, "Fine! You're my best friend who's actually right for once in his life!" shouted Sammi, finally being released by Vince's grip, seeing him have a shit-eating grin on his face. "Happy?'

"Yep!" said Vince, about to head back inside until Sammi took hold of his wrist. "What?"

"Well, 'best friend,' you're not gonna tell me why Sharise looked like she hated you earlier?" asked Sammi, raising an eyebrow.

Vince huffed, "I haven't been able to talk to her. She keeps running off on me to her friends or family. Please, I don't want to talk about it anymore. The fact you two looked like friends today weirded me out," said Vince, opening the doors to the theater.

"Hey, in my defense, Skylar likes me some odd reason!" shouted Sammi, following Vince.

"In that case, do you want to babysit and teach me to be a dad?" teased Vince, smiling at Sammi rolling her eyes.

"In your dreams," said Sammi, jabbing her elbow in Vince's side.

A hard knock echoed in Sammi's apartment, halting Sammi from draining the pasta she had boiling. She checked the analog clock that hung on her wall, wondering who would stop by out of the blue. After turning off the stove, Sammi opened the door without caution, surprised to see an upset Nikki standing in the hallway. Nikki rose there in the same dark vest and button-down from earlier, eyes tired as always.

"Why are you here? I didn't invite you over," asked Sammi, crossing her arms against her chest. Nikki pushed past Sammi, stomping into the apartment, sitting right down on the small dining table. He looked over the breakfast bar seeing the stem coming from the stove, nodding with approval.

"I thought since you were quiet to me after your smoke with your little ex, I'd drop by. Here to remind you what you got in your bed," said Nikki, leaning back against the chair with one arm resting on the back. Sammi closed her front door, stepping towards Nikki with a great distance.

"Please don't tell me you're jealous of Vince now? I already dealt with enough of that from him," said Sammi, leaning against the wall.

"I don't get jealous. Now, where's my dinner?" sniffed Nikki, wiping at his nose and bouncing his leg fast as he couldn't look Sammi in the eye.

"At your house. Where you keep your heroin," spat Sammi, getting Nikki to look her in the eye, his face going almost pale compared to olive skin. Sammi inhaled deeply, ready to fight with Nikki as her blood began to boil. Nikki stayed silent, trying to think of some bullshit lie to Sammi.

"Who told you that? Vince? You're really going to believe Vince, the guy who cheated on you?" asked Nikki, scowling at Sammi with deep wrinkles in-between his eyebrows.

Sammi shook her head, standing up straight. "Yeah, I am. Because him being sober from drugs means he sees shit when I'm not there. I know you're shooting up again! And I know you're doing some other shit drug with my brother!" yelled Sammi, pointing her finger right at Nikki. Sammi could see the discomfort on Nikki's face, him shifting in his seat, unable to even look unguilty.

"He's lying! I'm not doing it! You don't see me do that shit!" shouted Nikki, standing up to Sammi, getting closer to her face. Sammi stepped back a bit, glaring up hard at Nikki's dark eyes.

"Yeah, when you're here! I don't know what you do when you leave in the middle of the night! Or when you're by yourself in your house! How come we never go there anymore, huh?" demanded Sammi, pushing Nikki in the chest. Nikki stumbled back for a moment, flaring his nostrils from the sight of Sammi.

"Did you tell your little boyfriend about us then? Huh? You had to if you two decided to talk shit about me," muttered Nikki, getting right up close to Sammi, her back slamming against the wall. Sammi felt scared but knew she had to stand her ground in this situation, even if it resulted in something terrible.

"No, I didn't. Only how I flushed your drugs the last time, and you gripped my wrist. Are you going to admit it, or do I have to raid your room again and wait for you to hit me?" said Sammi, inhaling shakingly. Nikki took a few steps back, glaring at Sammi. Nikki then kicked one of the dining chairs, sending it flying across the room, almost breaking it. Sammi jumped in fear, covering her mouth from almost yelping, eyes open wide.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Sammi! Why do you give a shit if I'm shooting up!? I'm not offering it to you! You do coke, Ms. College Graduate! So why do you give a fuck?!" yelled Nikki, ready to pull his hair out of his head.

"Because it's dangerous! You can die if you go too far! Why would you throw all of this away for some drug?!" shouted Sammi, staying far away from Nikki. "And when I do coke, I fucking stop for MONTHS, alright?! I don't go on benders like the rest of you,"

"Yeah, because you think you're better than us. Just because we're not some assholes wearing a suit and tie to work with a stupid piece of paper," mumbled Nikki.

"Oh shut up, Nikki. Get that shit out of your head and get the fuck out of my apartment!" ordered Sammi.

Nikki narrowed his eyes at Sammi, walking closer to her only to have Sammi step away from him. "You're sure about that, Samantha?"

"Yes, I am, because you and I are fucking done! Whatever we are, we are done! I'm not dealing with your shit while you spiral out of control," said Sammi. Nikki didn't bother to move from where he stood, seeing if Sammi was only bluffing. "Get out! I want you out! Get the fuck out!" shouted Sammi, moving behind Nikki and pushing towards the door. She didn't restrain herself, pushing him harder and more aggressive as they got to the door. Nikki couldn't stop Sammi, shocked at the small girl's anger. Sammi yanked the door open, pushing Nikki out of her apartment with all her force.

"Sammi wait-" Sammi slammed the door right on Nikki's face, dropping herself to the floor. She let her head fall on her knees, a sob escaping her lips. Sammi felt the same sadness she once felt when discovering Vince cheating on her. She couldn't stop thinking how much of an idiot Sammi was for not paying attention. Sitting on the floor to let her sorrows out was the only thing Sammi wanted to do. She cried out alone like Sammi had been for some time now, almost like a repeated cycle since knowing all of Motley Crue.

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ashintheairlikesnow · 4 years

Text

Hunted Down, Part Two

CW: Explicit dubcon (both sides), noncon kissing and touching, drug use (not by our whumpees), violent emotional and physical abuse, emotional manipulation. Kauri is an abuse survivor struggling with self-blame. Stay safe.

Collaborative piece with @spiffythespook. TIMELINE: Takes place after Kauri’s break-up with Derrick, so this is the piece that takes place the farthest in Kauri’s future so far. Jack belongs to @spiffythespook.

Tagging Jack and Kauri’s crews: @maybeawhumpblog, @pepperonyscience, @haro-whumps, @18-toe-beans, @burtlederp, @finder-of-rings, @giggly-evil-puppy, @whimpers-and-whumpers, @moose-teeth, @whump-it, @lumpofwhump, @pumpkinthefangirl, @spiffythespook, @slaintetowhump @castielamigos-whump-side-blog, @rivertamandspike, @iaminamoodymoodtoday, @imagination1reality0

PART ONE

"This didn't have to happen," Owen said quietly. "It wasn't my fault. You did this, Kauri."

Kauri looked defeated. Miserable. Guilty. "I… I know."

It took all of Jack’s willpower to keep his mouth shut, to keep from talking back, from telling Owen Grant what exactly was what. He managed, but not without a visible scowl and glower at the man. Don’t sass. Don’t backtalk. Don’t presume, said the mantra in his head with a shot of pain. Jack winced and grit his teeth together, and then changed his goddamn mind because he could.

“Actually, it’s one-hundred-percent your fault, Mister. You’re the one with the obsession. You’re the one who bought the car, and the thugs, and the illegal room, and the gear, and you’re the fucker who’s about to rape us,” Jack snapped, voice and hand gestures full to the top with anger. “It ain’t his fault that he got stuck with a fucking psycho bitch.”

“Jack, no-” Kauri nearly shouted, wide-eyed, moving towards him with his hands up.

Owen’s eyes flared, a sudden spike of all-consuming rage, and he dropped the manacles - and you couldn’t call them cuffs, they really were just metal manacles - to the ground again. “I am not a psycho!” He nearly shouted back, his voice ragged at the edges, his eyes still wide with fury, raising his hand.

“Yeah you fuckin’ are, psycho!” Jack raised his voice to match - he had a lot of experience in voluminous communication.

Owen moved to backhand him across the face, and Kauri stepped between them - he threw himself between them, really. He took the full force of Owen’s hand, head snapping to the side with a cry as he dropped like a stone to the ground. Owen reached down and grabbed him by the hair, using his grip on those black curls to simply throw Kauri to the side.

“Fuck off, Vince,” He growled, with no sign that he was even aware, this time, that he’d called Kauri by the wrong name. “I’ll deal with you later.”

Oh, fuck- “Kauri, just don’t-” Jack said, even as he backed away from Owen. Man, why did he always not have his pepper spray when the assholes came around? “Whatcha gonna do, huh? Gonna beat me? Taken worse’n you can dish out. Come’n’get me, freak.”

“I had not particularly intended to,” Owen said, voice low and dangerously laced with his anger. “I hadn’t. I don’t… hurting people isn’t fun. I only hurt Kauri because I had to. The same reason I hurt Vince, I had to. That’s not my fault!” The fury in him was in full force now, the jealous rage at the idea that twice in a row, Vince had decided to try and fuck off away from him, and twice he had succeeded.

Not this time.

“I’m not going to hurt him, you fucking slut. You are.” He paused, considered that, twitched a strange, mean smile. “Well, maybe I will hurt him. But you’re going to help.” His hand shot out to grab Jack by the arm and pull him towards the bed.

Jack let himself be grabbed, and moved easily toward the bed with Owen. He held his tongue now - he figured telling the guy that it was his fault again would only end badly. So he switched gears. When they got closer, he pressed against the older man, pressed his free hand over Owen’s stomach and down his waist to his hip, and put on his long-practiced boyish smile. “Look, you know what he can do. Lemme show you what I can do, Mr Owen.”

Owen paused, staring down at him, surprised. There was a beat of time - enough to take in and let out a breath, a few heartbeats - where he genuinely had no idea how to react, as it wasn’t at all what he had expected.

Then he slid an arm around Jack, in a sort of false affection, until his hand caught in the younger man’s hair and pulled his head back, slowly, inexorably, until the angle would hurt.

“I know what you can do,” He said in a low voice. “What I want right now is to see you do Kauri. I want to see what he likes so goddamn much. I want to see you hurt him, you fucking whore. Make him cry. And if you hurt him well enough, I’ll give you a couple grand and let you walk out of here with all your goddamn limbs. Karen didn’t say I couldn’t cut anything off. Understand?”

Kauri, pushing himself back up to standing with a bright red mark lighting up one side of his face, let out a choked-off sob in response.

Jack cringed in pain and his breath hitched at the deal Owen proposed. Not a good hitch - much as a couple grand would help him out, Jack didn’t take fucking blood money from anybody. He blinked quickly, hating himself for how easily the tears came now. He breathed heavily, grit his teeth in the backbend and tried to look at Kauri.

He couldn’t do that. He could fake doing that. Maybe.

“Y-yeah, I can do that,” he said, expression giving away his misery.

"Good. You little shit. I don't know how you got her to protect you, but I am going to go right to the limit of what Renford will let me do. You stole him. Convinced him to stay on the street, like a fucking prostitute, like you. He should have come home to me."

Owen dragged Jack by his hair the rest of the way to the bed, all but throwing him on there. "Sit on the bed and put your fucking wrists up." He looked over his shoulder at Kauri, who flinched at the look on his face.

Jack obeyed, wrists up. He was regretting his mouth.

"Get the chains to tie you up, Kor-Bore."

Kauri nodded, shoulders hunched over, and picked up the chains Owen had been holding before. "Y-yeah, Mr. Owen, j-just, please-" he stumbled over to him and held them out, then flinched again as Owen yanked them out of his hands.

"You on the bed, too. Now." Kauri scrambled onto the bed, next to Jack, and Owen grabbed one wrist and closed the manacle tightly around it, then went to grab Jack and do the same.

When he was done, their wrists were chained together on each side, a little slack chain between them, facing each other. Kauri looked sick with fear.

Jack swallowed tightly, glancing between Kauri and Owen. “You want me to touch him now? You wanna see me show him a good time, or hurt him? Or do ‘em in that order? I’m confused.”

“Honestly, what I want to do would kill you both-” Kauri let out a little whimper and ducked his head, shoulders shaking as he tried to force back a new rush of tears. “Oh, shut up, Kauri. This is your fault. If you hadn’t run away from me, none of this would be happening, would it? Stop acting like such a fucking victim.”

The constant refrain insisting on his responsibility seemed to hit Kauri harder each and every time, made him slump a little more into himself. He twined his fingers through Jack’s with his right hand, and squeezed as hard as he could. An apology, the best he could manage when he was too scared in the moment to trust himself to speak again. Jack squeezed his hand back.

Owen moved, setting a few other things on the bed, and then he went to a side table, dumping a small pile of white powder from a tiny vial he’d had inside his pocket, using his credit card to carefully craft a perfect straight line.

He glanced at them, eyes narrowed. “I like your idea, Jack. Get him feeling good, and then make it fucking hurt. So he understands that he deserves it to hurt when he’s not with me.”

Jack swallowed, glancing to the side with a very angry look in his eyes, lips pursed. Drugged-up assholes were a familiar nightmare. At least the guy wasn’t wasting his precious coke on them.

“Sure, man,” he muttered. He turned to Kauri and cupped the other’s cheek, apology in his eyes as he shuffled forward and pressed against him, guiding Kauri in for a tender kiss, gently seeking access to his mouth.

He slid his hand from Kauri’s cheek to his hair, tipped his head back just enough to bare his neck. Jack kissed along the smooth expanse of skin, over one side and then under the ear that was out of Owen’s view. “When I start fucking you, I need you to scream like you’re in hell. I’m not gonna hurt you if I can help it,” he murmured softly, quickly, and then bit into Kauri’s skin.

Just as Jack started to speak, Owen had leaned over the line of white powder with a bit of rolled-up paper, and the only thing he heard was the sound of the drug snorting up his nose, blasting his mind with a white haze of feeling good and perfectly in control. He took a deep breath, shaking himself a little, and chuckled.

Jack rubbed his cheek against Kauri’s. “He’s wrong. ‘S not your fault. He’s crazy and mean, and it’s not your fault.” Kauri nodded without looking up, making a noise like a strangled sob.

And then his lips were against Kauri’s skin again wetly, seeking out his lips and slipping his tongue messily into the other’s mouth. He knew what looked good.

Kauri lifted his chin for that, but he could barely even try to kiss back. His mouth was trembling, his entire body shaking like a leaf, rattling the chain that bound their wrists together softly. He didn't let go of his death-grip on Jack's hand.

He was terrified, and even more terrified that being scared would keep him from reacting the way Owen wanted, that he would get Jack in even more trouble.

Owen wiped compulsively at his nose and settled himself on the bed, back against the headboard, to watch. If anything, his pupils were even smaller.

Jack guided Kauri gently down onto his back on the bed. He gave up on kissing Kauri’s mouth, instead focusing his lips on the other boy’s neck, on stroking one hand soothingly up and down his waist. He was getting hard, but that was more years of conditioning than the situation itself. He slid down Kauri’s body and kissed his cock, resuming the blowjob he’d been giving earlier. He reached for Kauri’s hands and guided them to his head, so at least he might feel more in control.

Kauri wanted to cling to Jack more than anything, just put his arms around his neck and hold onto him until Owen was done with this stupid game and killed him for leaving. Maybe then he'd let Jack leave. Instead, he felt his wrists move slowly as Jack's hands did, pulled along by the chains that connected them, and he closed his eyes, settling onto his back and trying not to think about the weight of Owen's eyes, the little sniffled snorts he could hear.

Owen had never done drugs - not once - when Kauri had been with him.

The kisses… felt good, at least, and Kauri breathed out slowly at the flutter of pleasure, skim of lips against a cock that had stopped being hard long before they even made it into the elevator.

He took in another breath, let it out, felt Jack's soft short hair against his fingers. Jack's hair, Jack's skin, Jack's smell. If he could be good enough, Owen would let Jack go.

He was sure of it.

So he pushed his hips up, just a little, to encourage Jack to keep going, and Jack did. He sucked on the tip of Kauri’s cock gently, tongued at his slit and popped up to lick wetly over the underside. Appearance was important.

Jack cupped at his sack, rolling it gently in his hand before he licked over it. He pushed Kauri’s legs up so they were bent, and kissed down his thighs, over his perineum, made his way back from down there to Kauri’s tip. Then he took the other’s cock into his mouth, as far as he could, and held still to suck on it.

Training had made sure Kauri's fear never interfered with his ability to get hard at any positive attention and he hitched in his breath at the rush of pleasure, Jack warm and wet and familiar and good around him. He kept his hands buried in his hair, feeling the chains that held them together pull taut or slacken as Jack's own hands moved.

"Th-that's, that's good, right there," He breathed, looking down at Jack's head for just a second, feeling a whole new rush of pleasure just seeing his mouth on him.

Owen's eyes narrowed, and Kauri felt the tension change in the room, closing his eyes again. He knew why Owen shifted around suddenly, even though he didn't say anything. He never really went down on Kauri - and Kauri had his eyes closed most of the time they were together.

Kauri felt a burst of anger and used it, arching his back to thrust himself a little further into Jack's mouth, letting out a soft moan. This was what Owen wanted, right? He wanted a fucking show before he murdered Kauri for leaving? He could give him a fucking show.

"L-little, um, there, little m-more of that…"

Jack moaned around Kauri, enjoying the feeling of his cock at the back of his throat. He was happy that Kauri was initiating a little. He pressed his tongue against the underside, cheeks hollowed out as he sucked, and began to move up and down Kauri’s length.

He kept going until he tasted pre from the tip, and drew off with an obscene, wet noise. He rubbed his cheek over Kauri’s length, then pulled away and looked over at Owen.

“Gonna need a bit of lube if you want me in him. He’s not gonna be any good for you later if he’s torn up. Blood everywhere, infections, trips to the hospital where they tell ya he shouldn’t have anything in him for weeks…”

Owen snorted, his eyes sparkling and overbright, glittering with dangerous intensity. "After what he did, it's not like he deserves it," He snapped. "Besides, Vince healed up just fine."

"Did… did he…?" Kauri asked, a little hesitantly, twisting his head to look at Owen, but he didn't pull his hands back, and ran one gently over the side of Jack's face, who leaned slightly into his palm.

"... I guess I don't fuckin' know, since I haven't… well, fine." Owen snorted and stood, grabbing a bottle out of the pile of accessories he'd brought with him. He dropped it without ceremony, and Kauri flinched as the cold glass bottle landed against his hip. "Don't use too much, this shit is expensive."

“Sure. Thanks, Mister,” Jack said, taking the bottle in hand. He poured a generous amount into his palm and slicked himself first. He made sure the fingers of his one hand were coated well, and set the bottle close to his own leg - easy for his own reach, and if Grant was going to take it, he would risk touching Jack.

He started with a couple fingers rubbing firmly at Kauri’s entrance, watching his face and paying attention to his responses to determine how tense he was.

Kauri kept his eyes on Jack, then - locked on his face, trying to stare long enough to block out everything else. I'm going to get you out of here, he mouthed, trying for a smile. It trembled, but held. Jack wasn’t great at lipreading, but he figured more or less what Kauri said. His brow raised in surprise.

Training was kicking in, and Kauri relaxed almost unconsciously when Jack's fingers touched him, tension drifting out of his body, hands finally falling away from Jack, letting his head fall back.

Jack knew that sort of reaction wasn’t exactly natural - it had to be trained, like Troy had trained his reactions to certain things. He was still relieved about it now, when a normal person might tense up with the fear of the threats Owen had made. He pressed one finger in first, still testing. He leaned over Kauri to kiss him, on his lips and then in a trail down by Kauri’s ear.

Kauri's head was still tipped back, his eyes half-closed, and he was still relaxed - not boneless but not far off - under Jack's touch. He shivered at the lips on his and against his skin, breathing out in a long, slow exhale.

“When I put more in you, try to sound like it hurts,” Jack murmured. Soon, he pressed a second finger in beside the first, more quickly than he usually would so he might surprise Kauri and help with the illusion.

Kauri gasped, caught by surprise, and jerked his head to the side and away from Jack, making a soft sound of pain, clenching his eyes shut and jerking his hands like he would try to push Jack away, before he went lax again.

Owen laughed - barely a sound, really - and settled himself in, relaxing back against the headboard. "That's more like it. Fucking slut. It's going to hurt with anyone who isn't me. Go on, get on with it." He waved a hand dismissively. "You can go faster than that."

Jack grit his teeth together, pushing back his anger at the man for even thinking about shit like this. He pushed in a second finger, but slowly, thankful that Owen couldn’t see exactly what he was doing. He was careful as he scissored them open, making sure Kauri was lax enough before he started to thrust them in roughly, deeply, his entire arm making the motion. It would’ve been painful if he’d gone in dry, or if Kauri had been tense from the situation.

Kauri clenched his eyes shut as tightly as he could, making the upper half of his body as tense as he could without his lower body following suit. He made himself think about Owen hurting Jack, maybe hurting him the way he'd hurt Kauri, choking him until he blacked out and then waiting for him to wake up and choking him again.

About Owen getting so angry he didn't let Jack leave, either.

His head turned to the side, tears leaked out from his closed eyes at the idea of Jack being hurt or killed because he'd been nice to Kauri one night when Kauri just… needed help.

Owen fell for Kauri’s lie, the way he’d fallen for almost all of them.

He leaned forwards, interested in the anguish on Kauri's face, and laughed to himself, leaning over to brush some of the black curls from Kauri's forehead. "Don't like that? He's not so good for you now, huh?"

Kauri shook his head, flinching from Owen's touch. At the same moment, he grabbed Jack's free hand again and squeezed.

I'm lying, you're not hurting me.

Owen looked up at Jack, with a wild, slightly mad grin on his face. "Look at that. He's a pretty crier, isn't he?"

Jack looked briefly at Kauri - how he had managed to make himself cry, he had no idea. He worried for a moment that it was something he’d done… but Kauri had grabbed his hand, and Jack hoped that was meant to reassure. So he looked at Owen and shrugged. “Dunno, buddy. I don’t like crying, I’m just doing my job,” he said, and then crooked his fingers to rub over Kauri’s prostate. He pushed a third in steadily.

"You don't?" Owen tilted his head, watching Kauri's hips jerk and the soft little moan he made, shaky and tear-filled, at the sudden burst of pleasure, melting apart feigned pain. "You should learn. I used to not, either, but he's so goddamn pretty crying. Most people aren't. He is." He petted at Kauri's hair tenderly, almost, except that his hands were shaking and his fingers caught in the tangles, jerking Kauri's head to the side.

"Oh, sorry, Kor-Bore," Owen whispered, with that hint of madness still in his eyes. "Don't get too distracted, huh?"

Kauri winced, but kept his grip tight on Jack's hand, sniffing. He knew he was believable - he'd lied to Owen before and he could do it again.

Jack bit his tongue to keep from talking, to keep from telling Owen how crazy he was, how bullshit this whole thing was. He focused on thrusting the three fingers in - all but slamming them in, really, so Kauri might have a better time faking his pain. He squeezed his other hand in Kauri’s. He focused on the here and now instead of the times they’d held hands in bed - the times Jack had fingered him open before while praising him, while Kauri rode his fingers with freedom and pleasure.

He pulled his fingers out, all at once, knowing he was going to lose his boner if he got distracted with Grant. He lined up to push in, staring down at Kauri… but he thought better of making the breach just yet. “May I, Mister Owen?” he said sweetly, a slight tilt of his head.

Owen's eyes were focused on Kauri's face, reading it, memorizing every detail, every tear track. He flicked them up to look at Jack, smirking, pleased. "Yeah, go for it." He tilted Kauri's chin back, until he had to arch his back a little, looking up at Owen almost upside-down. "He's got manners, Kor-Bore."

Kauri trembled, just a little, feeling a strange mix of needy and frightened, and it felt like training. Like a handler at each end, like it used to be. "J-Jack-"

"Ssssshhhhh," Owen said softly. "No one wants to hear you right now, Kauri."

Jack’s fake-sweet smile disappeared at that. He guided one of Kauri’s legs up toward his chest, settled his body low against Kauri, a hand between them to help guide himself in. Jack stared down at Kauri even though the other’s head was forced back, forced to look at Grant. He kissed at his neck, pressed his cheek to Kauri’s, out of view. “I would wanna hear you. I’m sorry, babe.”

He pushed just the tip in and braced so he could thrust, murmuring, “Remember to scream when I push.”

Jack waited just a moment...and then he thrusted in to the hilt all at once.

Kauri's body was still working hard to continue what it was trained for, and he was relaxed enough that he had to make himself think about losing Jack again, about what it would feel like if Owen really hurt him, to get the right amount of tears.

He let out a whimper, not quite a scream, and pulled his hands up to push at Jack's chest like he would try to push him away.

"No, no," Owen said softly, almost lovingly, and pushed Kauri's hands away. Jack froze, shuddering as Owen spoke like the creep he was. "Let him hurt you. You like that so much, like it when it hurts, too."

For maybe the first time, it became visibly obvious that Owen was also very much enjoying this - but only after Kauri was in visible (if faked) pain.

Jack gave a couple deep thrusts into Kauri before he noticed just how much Grant was enjoying himself. Again, he froze, this time to raise his brows at the other man. “I do have a backdoor if you wanna get in on this.”

At first, Owen, only raised an eyebrow, looking patently disinterested.

“J-Jack, don’t-” Kauri whispered. The look on Owen’s face changed all at once, taking in the way Kauri was shaking his head, trying to get Jack to look back at him. “D-Don’t, don’t do that, don’t-” Owen yanked hard at his hair again, his words cutting off and turning into a soft little cry of pain.

Kauri felt so good with Jack inside of him, everyone always felt good in him, and he was working hard to pretend it hurt when it didn’t. But he didn’t have to pretend when Owen grabbed him like that.

“Shut the fuck up, Kauri.” Owen looked all kinds of interested, now that it was clear Kauri absolutely did not want that to happen. “I’ve always wanted to try that…” His head felt crystal-clear, the cocaine had blown away his uncertainties and left Owen boiled down to his core. He shifted around, hurriedly removing his own clothing, his eyes mostly on Kauri as he did so. On the way he looked fucking miserable, just like he should. “Are you ready? If you’re not, I’m going to fucking hurt you.”

He shuddered at the words and rolled his hips forward, hands coming to smooth over Kauri’s waist. Wouldn’t be the first, jerk, he thought. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

He rolled his hips back again, widened his legs and curved his spine. A clear, blue-tinted glass plug was between his cheeks. Jack figured he’d let Grant take it out.

He looked down at Kauri and smiled - a real smile - and mouthed it’s okay. Then he rolled his head back, too, looking at the other guy. “I’ve been waiting all night for a good fill.”

Owen laughed, a sound that was at once sort of an off-kilter chuckle and also half-crazed. He was probably a little too high for this, but why not - see what Kauri liked so damn much, although Owen Grant had paid a lot of money to make sure Kauri was trained to take, not give.

Which meant this was one thing Owen could have that Kauri hadn’t, and from his own fucking friend, no less.

“Jesus, you weren’t kidding. Well, probably bad for business if you don’t do the work ahead of time.” The statement was surprisingly without his usual parade of judgement for Jack’s work, and he moved with an expert, light touch as he worked to get the plug back out of Jack without causing him too much discomfort. It wasn’t that he cared - muscle memory just took over. It felt pretty good to Jack nonetheless. “Kauri has one like this.”

“I told him about that one already-”

“Kauri, if you don’t shut your fucking mouth, I will stuff it full with the shit I brought in that bag.”

Kauri winced, and he badly wanted to put his arms around Jack’s neck, but the chains that held their hands together wouldn’t allow it. All he could do was look into his face, now that Owen wasn’t jerking his head around, and hope. Jack looked down at him with a warm smile, rubbing his thumbs over Kauri’s skin.

Owen bit his lower lip in concentration, slicking himself up with the lube, and it took maybe a little more work than he thought it would to line himself up before he pushed himself in, groaning, his forehead against Jack’s back. “Jesus fuck.”

The entry was… not the clumsiest Jack had taken. His mouth fell open and eyes shut as Owen pushed in, and he moved his hands to brace on the bed, close to Kauri’s side since they were chained together. He exhaled softly and smiled at Kauri again. Hopefully he was saving the other boy some excess emotional pain.

Jack rolled his hips forward, into Kauri, partially off of Owen. Pleasure burned up his spine. He leaned down and gently kissed Kauri - quick and even a bit playful. This didn’t have to be a nightmare even if they were both forced into it.

“C’mon little guy,” he risked tossing over his shoulder with a smirk.

Owen didn’t dignify Jack with a response - other than to grab him by the neck and push him down, until his head was buried against Kauri’s shoulder, before thrusting deeply into him and picking up a savage rhythm that would push him hard into Kauri, too. Jack moaned wantonly against Kauri’s skin, trying to keep some kind of movement while Owen pounded into him.

When Jack’s head was pushed down, Kauri pressed a quick kiss to the side of his head, then caught Owen staring at him and closed his eyes, trying to avoid that expression, the tiny pupils and the jealous anger there. He couldn’t stop his own noises as Jack was moving - and moved - in and out of him. Noises that were half-feigned pain, and half honest pleasure. He was hard, where he and Jack were pressed together, and his hips kept moving, trying to chase the friction and find more pleasure.

Jack could have easily been content to lie there - did he really give a crap if Grant got off? Nah - but he moved as much as he could into Kauri, working with Owen’s rhythm. He rubbed his cheek against the other, pressed his lips against his neck.

Owen’s eyes had focused on Kauri’s face as he fucked Jack relentlessly, the cocaine giving him plenty of energy. It was exactly what he’d hoped Kauri would look like - terrified and sad and overwhelmed, because this was it, wasn’t it? He’d finally found him. And he’d fuck his stupid whore friend and then shove Jack out of a car somewhere and he’d take Kauri home.

And tie him to the bed so he never left again, just like Vince.

It took Owen a second to realize something wasn’t… working, as well as it should be. He was thrusting but the sensation was… less. He shifted around a little, closed his eyes and tried to really picture Kauri’s face, how he’d look right back where he belonged, but… nothing.

Owen groaned, as he realized he was going limp inside the whore. His face started to burn bright red in humiliation.

Okay, to be fair, people didn’t go limp in Jack very often. Usually the older guys took Viagra before they got out of the car - or Jack got in - and that pretty much took care of that. He could remember...years ago, working for Troy...some of the junkies lost hardons like that. Anyway, the point was, he didn’t recognize what was happening at first.

When he did, though.

Jack tried to muffle his laughter at first, quick little breaths through his nose against Kauri’s neck. Kauri jumped, a little, looking confused and blinking over at Jack and then up at Owen, trying to figure out what was wrong. Jack pushed himself up and looked back, trying to keep his expression neutral… with no luck.

“Man-” nope, he was laughing pretty loudly, now, shaking his head. “Oh man. You got any little blue pills, little guy? That’s gotta suck, hay- hah-” deeeep breath. “Hate-fucking but without a tool in your toolbox, huh? Want a blowie?”

“J-Jack, what’s-” Then Kauri seemed to understand, all at once, and he was torn between a surge of hysterical laughter in his own throat - Owen had spent so long hunting him down, and when he catches him, this happens - and sheer terror at what Owen would do.

Owen’s eyes narrowed to tiny slits in his face, and he jerked back all at once like Jack had burned him. “Isn’t it your fucking job to keep the customer going-... stop laughing, you stupid little shit!” He grabbed Jack to pull him away from Kauri, except he’d forgotten their wrists were restrained together and when he did that, he jerked Kauri up to nearly sitting, too. Then Owen groaned and shoved Jack back again. Jack fell onto Kauri’s chest, but pushed himself off pretty quick, careful to do his best not to hurt him.

“Nah, man. If you can’t stay hard in me, that’s your problem. Nothing I can do fixes...that. That’s on you,” Jack said, laughter trailing off by now. He withdrew from Kauri and stroked a hand up and down his side, slow and gentle, an absent reassurance. “That’s… sleep deprived, maybe not enough food, uh… drugs. That’s all you. You need blue pills. And I don’t have any, ‘cause I take care of m’self.”

Kauri let out a soft exhale, then couldn’t stop himself - he laughed, too, although not directly at Owen. “Jack, you ate ramen packets twice a day for a week once.”

“I sleep, though!” Jack said, pushing at him. “And I don’t do drugs. And I’m not old.”

“Shut up!” Owen half-shouted, interrupting them. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, but the moment was gone and he could damn well feel it. And in front of Kauri, no less, before he was going to take him home… “Just… shut up, both of you. Shut your fucking mouths.”

Owen swallowed, hard, his eyes moving rapidly back and forth, not entirely under his own control. Then he grabbed a key off the side table and undid the restraints holding Kauri and Jack together. “You.” He turned his eyes on Kauri, who cringed back and away from the expression. Owen snorted and grabbed him by the arm, shoving Jack to the side with no gentleness, slapping the manacle back on Kauri’s wrist and threading it through the headboard before he closed the other end around the other one. “You’ll stay right the fuck here.”

Then he turned his eyes on Jack.

“You… you’re going in the bathroom with me.”

“Sure, man. Whatever you say,” Jack nodded. He tried not to be obvious about watching where that key went. He jerked his thumb over his shoulder. “This way, yeah?”

Owen rolled his eyes, leaning over to grab Kauri by the hair and slam his head back, a violent thunk into the headboard, listening to his half-muffled groan - and watching him go a little limp - with a flare of satisfaction. Jack choked back a protest, grit his teeth, looked away.

Who was laughing now, huh? He did it one more time for good measure. This time, Kauri didn’t even make a sound

Then he dropped the key into the drawer of the side table next to the bed. His eyes danced around the room, lighting on everything but struggling to focus, until they landed on a pair of cuffs he'd brought. Clearly bondage cuffs and not exactly torture material, but whatever.

He picked those up and pointed at the bathroom, glaring at Jack. "In. Now."

Jack threw up his hands in a frustrated sort of gesture, or a whatever, and walked to the bathroom. As he stepped in, he placed himself near the side of the counter closest to the electrical outlet. Hairblower would be in the drawer there. Hairpins would be with them. He turned to face Owen. “I do switch, so I could give you a great prostate orgasm if that’s something you’re interested in. Satisfaction guarantee~ Mind if I piss first, though?”

"Shut up," Owen said, but it was half-hearted and clear he didn't actually expect Jack to obey. "Listen to me." He jerked Jack's hand close, buckling the cuff on quickly - he'd had so much practice with Kauri it was nearly second-nature, even now - and twisting the short chain around the leg of the bathroom vanity counter, then grabbed his other wrist. Once he was hooked up, he took a breath, closed his eyes, seemingly trying to calm down.

"Listen to me," he said again. Clearly unaware he'd already said it once.

"He loves me. And he'll remember that soon enough. If I have to knock all his fucking teeth out this time… no, Kauri." He shook his head like a dog shaking off water. "No, I can bash his fucking brains in until he remembers. I paid a lot of fucking money. What are you, a fucking whore for hire."

“... look, man, whoever you’re pining over - maybe you should take this up with Vince instead of Kauri, huh?” he said, remembering the name Owen had called Kauri earlier. “You can make a guy take you up the ass, but you can’t make him love you. Can’t make anybody love you - hell, I couldn’t make my own mom love me and she’s the person who’s supposed to, right? What luck are you gonna have with this poor kid? ‘S not love, ‘s trained responses.”

Owen stared at him, then barked out a strange, bitter laugh. "Well there you go, slut, we have something in common beyond fucking Kauri." He ruffled Jack's hair, but his aim wasn't quite right and his hand slapped down harder on his head than he really meant it to. Jack flinched back. "We both have goddamn mommy issues. No, no he loves me. I know he does, I know… he stays with you, right? What, he's an ass for you to fuck when you get off the, the clock or what the fuck ever, and he gets food and shit in return?"

“No. He’s a friend.”

Owen snorted. He was feeling jagged, embarrassed, and pissed. He wanted more coke but knew he shouldn't, not so soon.

"Box Boys don’t have fucking friends. I'll bet he still goddamn dreams about me. They do good fucking work at WRU. He doesn't remember shit now. Just me. Just a whole goddamn life built around me."

“Oh, sure. A whole life built around you that he spends all his time running from. Man, must feel good to have a guy in your life you scare so bad all he ever wants to do is run and never see you again. Must feel mighty big, huh?”

Owen's eyes narrowed and he discovered, somewhat to his surprise, that his hands were around Jack's throat.

He stopped himself from squeezing the air out of him - a dead hooker in a hotel room was not the Where Are They Now? Owen wanted to be a part of - and forced his fingers to slowly uncurl until he let go.

"I didn't scare him," Owen said, his voice low, "Until he fucked up."

Jack gasped for breath. He always figured he’d die in a situation kinda like this, but man. He’d hoped. And here he was, breathing again! “... fuck,” he said on an exhale, chest still heaving. “You fucking scared him. You put a shock thing on his collarbone after you promised him you wouldn’t. That’s fuckin’ scary. That’s scary to me, and I’m not the one who has to walk around with his goddamn bones aching. Well… one bone, sometimes, but-”

He shook his head at himself with a laugh. “Anyway, you’re scaring the shit outta him now, too. Who gets fucking high to have sex? Wouldn’t be surprised if you tossed him off the roof tellin’ him to love you.”

"You don't know shit about that. All you fucking know is what he tells you. I wouldn't have had to if he hadn't been sending secret goddamn messages-... Jesus Christ, I'm arguing with a fucking prostitute."

Owen tried to make himself take a deep breath, calm down the fury that threatened to carry all his sanity away with it. He turned to stare back at Jack, grabbing him by the chin, narrowing his eyes to stare into him.

"What do you fucking do that I don't?"

Jack hesitated for a moment, eyes going hopeless and empty. And then the answer came.

“I care about him and what I can give him. Not what me and what I can take from him,” he stated calmly, staring up into Grant’s eyes. Then he smirked. “And I can make him come thinking of me while I’m fucking him, ‘cause I don’t beat his heart to shit.”

Owen gave him a stare that said he would very much like to choke Jack again, but this time all he did was shake him by the chin and then let go, dropping his hand.

"Wait right here for me," He said, deadly soft. "I'm going to get some ice, and when I get back, you are going to watch." He took Jack's wrist to rattle the cuffs, emphasizing the predicament he was in, then turned and walked out, leaving him there.

Kauri's eyes were on him the second he came out, and a headache was starting to drift in around the edges of Owen's awareness. "Mr. Owen, j-just, just let Jack go, he didn't do anything wrong-"

"No, he didn't, but you did." Owen closed his eyes, briefly, against the way the world seemed jagged and painful. Couldn't be a comedown already, could it?

"I, I know, I'm s-sorry I left, just let him go and you can, can make me as sorry as you want," Kauri tried. Owen shot him a glare and Kauri flinched back against the headboard.

"Fuck off. I'm getting ice. When I get back, I'm going to make him sorry he ever fucking met you. Just like everyone else should be, you piece of shit." He headed for the door, sweeping up the keycard for the hotel room on the way. "This is your fault, Kauri. Everything I’m going to do to him, that he gets hurt at all, it’s all your fucking fault, you piece of shit slut. This is what knowing shitty people like you and fucking Vince does to people - it turns us fucking crazy and gets us fucking hurt. Don’t you fucking forget it.”

"I… I won't," Kauri said softly, sincerely, and watched Owen leave. He waited until the door clicked shut and he heard the faintest beep from the private elevator before he yelled, "Jack, are you okay? Did he hurt you?!"

Jack definitely heard them talking, but didn’t really pay attention to what they were saying - bit too quiet for that. He was already fishing hairpins out of the drawer.

“Yeah, I’m fine! Moron cuffed me like I can’t pick a fuckin’ simple dipshit lock like this-” snap, and he was out of one cuff. Jack fiddled with the other as he walked out of the bathroom. “That was the most annoying and unsatisfying top I’ve had in years. And I’m a hooker.”

He had the cuffs off by the time he reached the bedside table. He slid the drawer open and took out the key, leaned over Kauri as he unlocked the other’s cuffs. “Bet he’s going to get a little blue pill instead of ice,” he smirked. And then softened. “How’re you doin’?”

Kauri threw his arms around Jack's neck, holding onto him for dear life. "I'm sorry," He whispered, shoulders shaking. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…"

Jack froze, not at all used to this response. He and Rory had come to a point eventually where they watched each others’ backs and puffed up to be brave for each other. Jack wasn’t used to the normal emotional responses anymore.

“Hey,” he said softly, hands coming up to pat and smooth over Kauri’s back. “Hey, you’re okay. I know what I’m doing, here. This doesn’t hurt me like it hurts you. ‘S not your fault, Birdie, an’ I’m not hurtin’ at all. Okay?”

“I, I don’t, I didn’t m-mean to get you hurt, I didn’t…” Kauri sniffed, burying his head briefly in the side of Jack’s neck and taking in his smell - still the same, not the way Owen smelled at all. The hand over his back felt good, and comforting, and like it could wipe away a little of the look on Owen’s face. “I’m sorry, I, I should’ve lied and said I didn’t know who you were but he-... when he touches me I just freeze up, I-... I’m trained not to lie to him and I can, and I do, but he just, I just was, was surprised, I didn’t know…”

“That’s okay, Birdie. I’d rather be here getting hurt tryin’a take care of you than turn around and see you gone. Okay?”

Kauri pulled back, looking miserable and pale as he started to scramble around to try and find Jack’s clothing and toss it to him. Owen had tightened the cuffs around his hands too tightly, and there were red marks on his wrists from when they’d been cuffed together. Jack pulled on his pants and made his way over to his boots.

“We, I gotta get you out of here, J-Jack, I’m s-s-sorry, I’m just-... I’m sorry…”

“Kauri, will you fucking listen for a sec?” Jack looked up from tying up his boots. “It’s not your fault. I care enough about you. I'm focused on taking care of you, jus’ like you’re trying to take care of me, okay? Cool it and get your own clothes on. I’ve got me, and we’re both getting outta here before he comes back.”

Kauri stared at him, wild-eyed, before he slowly nodded and slipped back into the clothing he’d been wearing, the cropped shirt and black jeans and checkered shoes. He told himself he was following orders, and that calmed some of the panic which currently threatened to completely derail him. The panic and guilt, slowly eating him alive.

“Are-... are you sure? I can, can stay, so he won’t look for you if I’m here.” Kauri stopped by the side table, looking down at where Owen had left his wallet - taken his credit card on the way out, but left the wallet itself. He reached in and grabbed all the cash in there, turning to shove it into Jack’s hands.

“Jesus Christ, Kauri-” Jack said, but he still took the cash and shoved it into his pocket. “No. You’re gonna come with me, Birdie.”

“I can stay,” Kauri whispered, eyes wide and terrified. “If I’m here he won’t look for you, I can stay.”

“You can, but you’re not gonna.” Jack grabbed his hand and started pulling him along, into the elevator and down to the first floor. What better way to exit than the front doors? “Keep your head down, buddy.”

Kauri nodded, rapidly, pressing himself against Jack. He was shivering all over, shaking like the last leaf on a tree in winter, and his fingers would be freezing cold to the touch from fear. He could feel his heart pounding all over again, just like when Owen choked him and then waited for him to wake up and then choked him and then-

He caught a sob before it made it all the way out, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to breathe as the elevator moved down. “Jack, he’s gonna kill me,” He whispered. “He’s, he’s gonna kill me.”

“You’ll be okay, Birdie,” Jack said, putting his arm around Kauri’s shoulders and pulling him in. “We’re gonna get out, and he’s gonna find out you’re not there and he’s gonna be pissed, but he’s not gonna kill you. Not if I can help it.”

Kauri’s hand came up and started to rub at the scar over his collarbone, pushing back a phantom fire that raced through his nerves, pressing hard against the spot where the thin, metal plate was still bolted into him, the part they couldn’t get out on their own.

He nodded, slowly, shifting back and forth on his feet, nervously fidgeting. The affection was good, though, and he leaned into it, taking a deep breath. Jack still smelled like himself, like the cologne he put on for nights he went out and wasn’t actually working.

“He’s, he’s so angry and he’s not-... he doesn’t… he’s, um.” Kauri swallowed, hard, against a latent sense of disloyalty and why did his mind still want him to be loyal to someone who was trying to kill him? “He’s… crazy, isn’t he?”

“Yeah, man. He’s really fucked in the head. He’s obsessing, like the batshit guy I was bought for. Totally out of it. And he’s on drugs. People don’t stay sane on drugs.”

The elevator dinged at the bottom floor, and Jack guided Kauri quickly out of it and through the halls, away from anybody wearing a hotel uniform.

“He n-never, he never did drugs…” Kauri’s voice was small. “He used to do, um, drugs before me. He told me he went to rehab. He’s never… done drugs around me…”

As they moved through the hallway, there were a few other people up and about, this late at night. Kauri felt their eyes on him and hunched over a little more, his face burning bright red, expecting to be stopped at any second or to hear Owen’s voice yelling for him.

They all looked at him with this angry judgement, looked down their noses. Kauri wasn’t thinking about how he looked - with his mussed-up hair, scruffy shoes, and outfit that flashed a hint of the pale skin at his stomach - or how Jack looked.

“Did me leaving make… make him do drugs again? Did I make him do that?”

“Nah. Junkies take any excuse they can to get back on their poison,” Jack said quietly, shaking his head. He walked Kauri right out of the hotel, and immediately took the shortest way he could find out of the parking lot, too.

Kauri nodded, keeping himself hunched over, trying to look like anyone other than who he was until they were all the way back into the streets. It had to be the middle of the night, and Kauri had no idea where they were and no way to read any signs. He just clung to Jack and let him do the work, to figure it out.

“Jack, um… why did he… why’d he wait til I was out? Why not just come get us at your place?”

“Dunno. I’d say maybe he doesn’t know about my place, but he said he was talking with Renford. Renford knows,” he shrugged. “Maybe it was easier to snatch in public than break into the building.”

Jack looked at the streetsigns at an intersection, slowly read each one. Yeah, he knew this area. He led Kauri across the street and started walking back home. “Don’t have anywhere safer to go, not unless we rent a different hotel with his money. Think we should do that?”

He thought, for a second, that maybe they should go to one of the pet shelters. Kauri belonged in those… but… Jack didn’t. And Renford was watching Jack. If a shelter took them and somehow managed to help, chances were that Jack would drag them under.

“No, but… but it would have been easier for him, for what he wanted to do. If he went to your…” Kauri shuddered at the mention of the Director’s name, shrinking into himself with a bone-deep fear he could never shake. He’d only been directly disciplined by the Director twice - he didn’t clearly remember either time, beyond knowing he never, ever wanted it to happen again.

“What if-... she, um. Mr., um, Mr. Owen said he wasn’t allowed to kill you… what if… she didn’t tell him where you live?”

Jack stopped a moment, staring at Kauri. “Sonofabitch. You think?” He thought, and the more he thought, the more it made sense.

“...she must either really like me or really hate me. I spat on her shoes once, y’know-” he had probably mentioned that before, but he was pretty proud of himself for it. “Kay, well. Better not look a gift horse in the mouth. Let’s go home.”

Kauri nodded and slid his arms around Jack’s waist briefly, squeezing him as hard as he could and burying his head against Jack’s neck. He took a deep breath and then pulled back again and straightened his spine, trying to look stronger than he felt.

“Can… can I sleep in your bed, um, tonight?”

He slept in Jack’s bed whenever he stayed over, but Kauri wanted to ask, this time. Needed the reassurance, needed Jack to understand that what he was really asking was, can I hold onto you until I fall asleep?

“Yeah. You can sleep in my bed anytime, Birdie. You can even kick me onto the couch so you can sleep on my bed,” Jack grinned, leaning down to kiss Kauri’s head. He understood, though. “Or I can stick around and keep you cozy.”

“Stick around,” Kauri said softly. “And you can use that money you stole-”

“That I stole? You took it out of his wallet!”

Kauri’s smile was shaky, but real. “... fine, the money we stole to take a few days off. I, I just…” He stopped, and kissed Jack’s cheek. “I’m glad you’re my best friend. Come on, I know the bus driver who runs the route this late, she’ll let me bring you on without having to pay extra.”

He grabbed Jack’s hand and pulled him towards the bus stop, Owen’s words still echoing inside his head.

None of this would have happened if you hadn’t run away from me.

#whump #emotional abuse #recaptured #captivity #restrained #violent whumper #intimate whumper #creepy whumper #tw: noncon #tw: dubcon #tw: mutual dubcon #blood #degrading language #abuse #tw: domestic abuse #erase to control

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xsixxx · 4 years

Text

Bad Influence - Chapter 11

Word Count - 5.4K

Authors Note - It's been a while! 👋🏻 About 4 months I think 😬 If there are any Bad Influence fans actually left out there, I'm so sorry & I love you. I had a really fuckin shitty last few months of 2019 & because of that, I kinda stopped doing the stuff I enjoy, writing this fanfic & using this blog being one of them.

Then I tried to come back before I was ready 😂 I wrote this chapter out about 2 months ago, but never bothered to post it bcos I didn't care enough about it. But I've recently returned to it, rewrote it & remembered why I fuckin love writing this fanfic. So I'm super excited to post this chapter & I hope you don't all hate it after how long it's been 😂 It's a bit rough bcos I'm getting back into it & I'm kinda rusty!

I love you guys for baring with me, I can't wait to get back into writing this fic for you 🖤

Warnings - Um, the f word is used in like every sentence oops, some implied smut when Nikki is remembering (choking trigger warning), I guess 'violence' but not really violence???, a whole lot of angst & a teeny bit of fluff at the end

Tags - @cruecifymesixx @freddiessmallnipples @queen-crue @scarecrowmax @lovesick-heart0 @littlesunnymoon @80sheart-strings @cranberrirolls @inthebackofmycarlaytheirbodies @versnatasha @zoenicolesetser @crazysaladchopshop @ggorehorror @lunamadhatter99 @justtryingtoovercome @chaoticvybe @you-know-im-a-dreamer @eightiesrockbaby @valentines-in-london @xrosegoldwolfx @fupatroopaa @lilypetite88 @this-blog-must-be-the-place @ashleecrue @lauravic @dark-princess99 @unknownoblivion @mgkobsessed @antheasnow @rockaholi @nassauartist @sparxx27

(there's one bit where Nikki is glaring across the bar at a character & this gif is spot on)

*Nikkis POV*

I drummed my fingers to the sound of a guitar as I watched Mick do his thing through the glass of the recording booth, his fingers working magic as he played the riff to Looks That Kill.

Fuck, that weird little guy could play.

“Nikki, this song is gonna fucking kill!” Tommy yelled enthusiastically, beating his drumsticks on the arm of the battered couch his was lounging on.

I smiled weakly back at him, my nerves keeping me from matching his excitement. “I hope so,” I mumbled. I look around the studio, basking in the enormity of where we were right now. Mötley was recording their second album & my nerves were shot. It had to be perfect. It had to do well.

“Stop stressing man, everyone’s gonna fucking freak over this album, I just know it!” He replied, smiling encouragingly, his usual Tommy level of positivity feeling sickeningly sweet, but still, I nodded at him gratefully. “So we hitting up The Whisky or what tonight boys?” He continued, addressing Vince as well as me, who was pouting on the couch next to him.

I chuckled without amusement, shaking my head. “Fuck no, not a chance I’m going in there yet.”

Tommy scowled at me. “Sixx, come on dude, you cant avoid the place forever. Plus, she might not even be working tonight!”

“I’m not risking it! I’m not gonna be able to enjoy the night if she’s there, judging my every fucking move, you know how she is.” I replied, rolling my eyes.

“So you’ve still not talked to her since..” Tommy trailed off, awkwardly. But Vince happily picked up from where he’d left off.

“Since you lead her on, fucked her & then blew her off?” He snapped arrogantly, instantly causing my jaw to tense.

“Don’t fucking start with me, Vinny. I’m not in the mood.”

“Oh, you mean you don't wanna hear about what a dick you were? What a surprise.” The sarcasm thick in his voice.

I slammed my hand down on the recording table & stood up sharply. “The fuck is your problem, man?” I snarled, his attitude & the mounting stress from the album mixing together to create a dangerous cocktail of anger & belligerence.

“My problem?” He questioned, standing up to meet my stare. “My problem is you Sixx. Beths a good fucking girl, what you did was real messed up, I should fucking floor you again for how you treated her. You owe the chick an apology at the goddamn least.” He spat, his anger in Beths defence honourable, but fucking irritating.

I chuckled arrogantly at his misplaced valiance. “Give it up the knight in shining armour act Vinny, I didn’t see you rushing to commit to her when she was getting your dick wet.”

I saw the danger flash in his eyes as he took a warning step towards me. “I didn’t fuck her & leave either.” He hissed, the venom in his voice palpable.

“Aw, did I upset your girlfriend?” I joked patronisingly, very aware that I was pushing it too far, but yet I couldn’t help myself, Vince acting all high & mighty was really starting to piss me off.

Vinces eyes narrowed sharply & I saw his hands ball into fists at his side. “Like I said, she’s a good girl. She didn’t deserve that.” He said through his teeth, the strain to keep calm evident in his voice.

I smirked at him amused, looking him up & down. “Whatcha gonna do Vince? Hit me again? Defend her honour? She’s a chick dude & a stuck up one at that. And she ditched your ass if you remember, you should be thanking me.” I laughed, shrugging.

“You know what Sixx, you’re an asshole. You know as well as I do that Beth isn’t another fucking groupie to this band. Nah, I didn’t wanna date her, but I like her- We all like her.” He corrected himself quickly.

“Vinny’s right man, I’m not taking sides, but Beths cool & I kinda do like having her around!” Tommy piped up, nodding.

“Fuck off T-Bone, you only want her around because you know as soon as she goes, so does your uptight piece of ass.” I shot at him, my frustration with the pair of them growing at a dangerous rate.

“Dude c’mon, there’s no need..”

I cut Tommy off viciously. “What the fuck has happened to this band?!” I shouted, shoving Vince out of my face. “Since when do we give this much of a fuck about chicks?! Look at where we are?!” I gestured around the recording studio. Mick had stopped playing & had casually lit a cigarette as he watched us bickering through the sound-proof glass. “This is what’s important. Now I’m going for a fucking smoke, this conversation is done & when I come back in we’re gonna record a fucking album, got it?!”

I barged out of the studio, flicked open my lighter & sparked up my cigarette, leaning back against the wall as I took in a shaky drag, my anger still surface level. I exhaled & closed my eyes, feeling the May sun warm my face & start to melt my mood away.

What was everyone’s fuckin’ obsession with this girl?!

Yeah she was cool, but she’s still a chick. And chicks = trouble.

I let my mind wander back to the look she gave me as she lay beneath me, my hand around her throat as she came undone & smirked to myself as I lifted the cigarette back to my smug lips. She was so worth the chase.

But Christ, I’m supposed to feel bad because I don’t want all that cutesy shit afterwards? No. Beth knew me, we’d had enough arguments about the kinda guy I am, she did this to herself. Not my fault that she thought she meant anything more to me than any one of those other girls. She was a fuck. A good fuck. But a fuck nonetheless.

I took another drag as the image of Beth sat in her bed with that stung look on her face snuck its way involuntarily into my mind. I could see those hurt tears & hear her bitter words ordering me to leave. I couldn’t help the pang of guilt in my stomach that accompanied the image.

She’s a fuckin’ chick, Nikki. Chicks = trouble, I recited to myself, rubbing my face roughly with my hands, almost in hope that I could scrub away the memory of her pained face. Get over it man, it’s done.

I sharply exhaled the last of my smoke before throwing it aggressively to the floor, somehow more frustrated than I was before.

Time to go record a fuckin’ album.

*Later*

*Beths POV*

I smoothed out the material of the tiny black dress I was wearing as I pouted my lips at my reflection in the mirror, appreciating the sight of myself all dolled up & ready to forget all about Nikki fucking Sixx.

I flashed an all too familiar looking smirk at myself before I spun around of my sky high heels & strutted out of the ladies bathroom & back over to Sophia who was waiting at the bar, two drinks in hand. She winked at me as I got closer, holding out one of the glasses for me to take.

“Girl, you look unreal! If we weren’t here trying to pull for you, I’d take you home right now,” she laughed, nudging me & winking again.

I let out a laugh as I took a swipe at her arm, “I am not here trying to pull!” I insisted, not even managing to fool myself. It’d been a little over a week since I went from the all time high of fucking Nikki to the crashing low of realising I meant nothing to him in a matter of minutes & I’d laid around feeling sorry for myself ever since. Well, not tonight. I was gonna find a guy & I was gonna remind myself what a goddamn catch I am.

“Oh Beth, there’s a reason you’re wearing that dress tonight & girl, it ain’t for the coverage,” she giggled as I took another playful swipe. “Hey, there’s no judgements here! I’d want a good lay after the emotional rollercoaster that has been Nikki Sixx!”

I raised my eyebrows at her as she quickly mimed locking her lips. “Sorry, sorry, we don’t mention that name, my bad.”

I shook my head. “It’s fine, I’m over it,” I lied. “But, if a cute guy wants to buy me a drink & maybe show me a good time, I’m not gonna say no.” I shrugged as we both burst into a fit of giggles, before I took a long sip of the very strong cocktail.

“Well that sounds like my queue.” Came a smooth voice from behind me. I turned to face the handsome stranger who was stood leaning casually against the bar, eyebrow cocked as his eyes scanned up & down my body, drinking in the sight of me. “You have excellent timing.” I blushed, appreciating his good looks right back. He was classically good looking, with blonde hair & a chiselled jaw, dressed smart in a shirt that hugged his toned physique & muscular arms just enough to spark a little intrigue as to what lay underneath. He was the exact opposite to Nikki in every physical way. Where Nikki was unruly & unkept, this guy was clean shaven & well groomed. He wore no leather or studs & his smile was friendly & genuine, not smug & he wasn’t dripping in arrogance.

“I’m Daniel.” He introduced himself, holding out a hand for me to shake. I looked into his electric blue eyes & blushed once again.

“Beth, it’s nice to meet you.” I replied as smoothly as I could.

“& I’m Sophia, but I guess no-one asked,” she piped up mockingly, winking at me. “Now Dan, unless you’ve got a cute, single friend for me, I’m gonna get outta your way & go for a dance.” Soph smirked, grabbing her drinking & flouncing off towards the dance floor, blowing us a kiss as she did.

We both let out a laugh. “She seems great,” Daniel said as I nodded, taking a sip of my drink. “She mentioned something about an emotion rollercoaster though? I hope I’m not stepping on anyone’s toes?” He queried.

I swallowed my drink before letting out a little laugh. “Not at all, there are no toes to be stepping on, don’t worry.”

“Well good, I’m glad. I’m surprised though, a gorgeous girl like you doesn’t have a man. You’re sure there’s no-one, because you seem way too good to be true!” He flirted, as I laughed

“Oh you’re smooth.” I teased, “but no, there’s absolutely no-one.” I answered, pushing any & all thoughts & feelings I might have towards Nikki Sixx out of my mind.

*Little later*

“Wow, so you’re a doctor?” I asked, impressed.

Daniel laughed, shaking his head. “I wish! I’m a med student currently, but that’s the hope one day.”

“What made you wanna get into medicine then?”

He paused for a second, his warm smile faltering for a brief moment & I sensed his hesitation to answer. “I, um, lost my dad when I was younger. Spent a lot of time in hospitals with him when he got sick. I remember watching all these doctors around me taking care of people, helping, curing.. They seemed like superheroes to me back then. After we lost my dad, I knew I wanted to help people, be one of those people that kids could look up to in the same way I did, yanno?”

I nodded, smiling at his compassion & genuineness.

“Sorry, bit heavy for a first meet, I know.” He laughed awkwardly.

“Not at all!” I replied, “I asked the question, you just answered it honestly, I appreciate that.”

As Daniel carried on talking about his studies, I couldn’t help but admire him. THIS was the kinda guy I was supposed to end up with. Smart, hot as hell, a brilliant career ahead of him, goals, aspirations.. He was exactly the kinda man I could take home to my father. Daniel was everything I should want & he was actually interested in me.

And yet, I still felt that unwanted & yet infuriatingly all-to-familiar flame ignite the second I heard his voice drift over from the bar.

“Jack & coke please darlin’.”

Nikkis voice hit me like a slap in the face & rush desire all at once & I immediately froze, my body unsure how to react to my contrasting emotions.

“Are you ok?” Daniel asked, reaching out & touching my arm, concern written across his face. I flinched as his touch, still lost somewhere in Nikkis voice, & snatched my arm away instinctively.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-“ Started Daniel, his concern look now laced with panic.

“N-no, its fine honestly, its not you, its just..” I drifted off, briefly glancing behind me, trying to pin a location on the voice. My eyes caught sight of the four of them standing at the bar, waiting on their drinks. Nikki was dressed in his usual leather trousers, torn at the knees, & combat boots & a torn up shirt. His hair almost appeared messier than usual & he had a cigarette hanging from his lips. He couldn’t have been more different from the sharp, handsome man sat opposite me.

Daniel followed my line of sight & spotted the literal motley crew. Nikki was already hitting on the bar maid, distracting her whilst Tommy & Vince reached over & stole a bottle from behind the bar; all whilst Mick stood by, watching disapprovingly & swigging from his trademark flask.

“You know them?” Daniel asked hesitantly.

“Nope.” I replied bluntly, snapping back to reality & turning back to him. “I fancy getting out of here though, you wanna head back to mine, continue the drinking there?”

Daniel looked a little taken a back at the upfront offer as I stood up & downed the last of my drink, but I was fairly certain he wouldn’t refuse. I didn’t care either way at this point, I just needed out of here.

“Um sure-“

“Great, I’ll go find Sophia..”

“She’s over there, talking to those guys you apparently don’t know.” Dan stated, his tone now flat & a little judgemental as he raised an eyebrow at me.

“Look, Daniel, I don’t wanna get into it, but its better we just leave.” I said, hoping to avoid any questions, but his face was growing more unimpressed by the second. “I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you Dan, ok? But I can’t be here right now, so I gotta go. I’d, um, I’d like you to join me.. If you want to, of course. I mean, you don’t have to..” I mumbled, suddenly very aware & embarrassed by how he must be viewing me in that moment.

I saw his eyes narrow at my discomfort &, I’m assuming against his better judgement, he nodded & stood up to join me. “I’m not sure what’s happening here, but I’ve enjoyed getting to know you too & maybe you could fill me in on why you’re running away over that drink at yours?” He asked, a little suspicious but friendly. I nodded, giving him a small smile.

We started towards the exit when I felt a pair of hands snake around my waist & lift me excitedly into the air. I squealed in shock & suprise as Tommy span me around before placing me back on my feet.

“Beth! I cant believe you guys are here, what’re the chances? Soph said you came here to avoid us & we came here because Sixx wanted to avoid you! How fuckin’ funny is that?” He said, roaring with laughter, his hand resting on his stomach as he struggled to regain control on his amusement.

“Tommy.” I said sternly, shooting him a look that told him to shut the hell up. He quickly stood up straight, coughing a little to hide his laughter, before glancing over towards Daniel.

“Hey, who’s this? I’m Tommy dude, how ya doing?” He said, offering out his hand enthusiastically.

“Daniel, I’m good man, how’re you?” He answered, accepting the handshake hesitantly.

“I’m good? Hey, you wanna come meet the rest of the guys?” Tommy offered enthusiastically, without a second thought as to why that might not be such a good idea.

“Actually T-Bone, we’re just heading out.” I replied sharply, giving him another warning look.

“Ok, ok,” he laughed, holding his hands up in defeat as he got the hint. “It was nice to meet you man!” Tommy smiled at Dan, who nodded awkwardly back to him before T-Bone practically bounced back over to the bar.

“Don’t know them huh?” Daniel asked, his voice oozing with sarcasm suddenly, making me cringe.

“I’m sorry, they’re just.. A lot, ok?” I tried to explain, frustrated, mainly with myself.

“What’s the deal with this one?” Asked Dan, gesturing towards Nikki, who was leaning against the bar, sipping on his Jack & coke, his eyes fixed coldly on he two of us.

“That’s the, um.. Emotional rollercoaster.” I answered sheepishly, coughing to distract from my amounting discomfort, whilst simultaneously avoiding the eyes of both Nikki & Dan.

“Right.. Well, your rollercoaster is on his way over here.”

Fuck.

I glanced up to see Nikki, in all his arrogance, strolling towards us, his usual smirk fixed in place.

“I’m so sorry for whatever he says.” I quickly whispered to Dan, before Nikki came to a stop in front of us. I watched his eyes scan up & down Daniel, obvious sizing him up without an ounce of subtlety, before he turned his attention to me.

“Leaving without introducing us, Lizzy?” He drawled, the pretension thick in his voice.

“Yes Nikki, I am. So if you’d like to move-“

He cut me off, his focus back on Daniel. “I’m Nikki Sixx,” he stated, without the courtesy of a handshake.

“Daniel,” Dan replied, flatly, seemingly glad there was no extended hand to shake.

“And how do you know the lovely Lizzy here, Dan?” Nikki asked, his smirk never once faltering.

“We just met tonight, but we’re justing heading back to hers, if you don’t mind.” Dan replied simply, taking my hand.

“Oh but you see, I do mind.” Nikki stated bluntly, his smile as wide as it was dark as he side stepped back in front of Dan who had tried to manoeuvre round him. “Lizzy here is what we like to call a groupie & we,” he gestured towards the rest of the band behind him, “don’t particularly like sharing.”

“Oh fuck you, Sixx.” I scoffed, my face growing hot with a mix of anger & embarrassment. I turned to look at Dan, cringing at his raised eyebrow & gave him an apologetic look. “Don’t listen to him, he’s just being an asshole, I’m not a groupie.”

“Really?!” Nikki replied, dragging out the word dramatically as his shit eating grin somehow managed to grow wider. “Because I remember fucking you about a week ago & my boy Vince over there,” he pointed to at the very pissed off looking lead singer, “swears he remembers fucking you not long before that? Or are with both mistaken? I mean, there are a lot of you girls, you do all kinda look the same.. Feel the same too.” He chuckled darkly, shooting me a sly look. I glared at him with an expression so deadly that dared him to carry on. He rose to the challenge. “I tell you what though buddy,” Nikki continued, leaning into Dan so he was speaking into his ear, but just loud enough for me to catch what he was saying, “if you’re heading back to hers you’re in for a treat. She’s got the mouth of a motherfuckin’ Angel.” He finished, glancing over at me & winking. I was prepared to fly at him in a blind rage, fists balled, ready to wipe that smug smile off of his face permanently, when Dan spoke up, in a voice so peaceful & gentle, that it made his words seem somehow harsher.

“You are an arrogant piece of shit. I’ve been sat with this girl for the last hour & I spend a minute in your presence & it’s immediately clear to me that she’s way too good for you. But I’m sure she’ll realise that in her own time.” Daniel turned back to me, his expression stoney & irritated, but I could swear there was a hint of sympathy in his eyes. “If you ever get off of this rollercoaster doll, you know where you can find me.” He said, letting go of my hand as he stepped around the unmoving Nikki.

“Daniel, wait..” I caught him by the arm & quickly stepped in his path, stopping him.

“Beth, you seem like a great girl & I don’t think I’ve ever hit it off so quickly with someone like I have with you. But it’s obvious you have something with that guy & I’m not really interested in competing with him for your attention.”

I nodded slowly, knowing his words were fair. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. And I mean it, if you decide to get off the rollercoaster.. I can probably offer you a slightly calmer ride. A carousel maybe?” Dan winked, laughing as I let out a light giggle. His blue eyes focused on mine, sending a surge of electricity through my body that momentarily extinguished the flame that Nikki somehow always managed to light. I lifted my lips & placed them softly on Daniels for the briefest second, before pulling away.

“Thank you.” I whispered.

His eyes lingered on my lips for a second, silently asking for more, before he came back to reality & gave me a genuine smile. “It was nice to meet you Beth. I do hope I get to see you again”, he nodded, before kissing my cheek & heading for the door.

I stood still for a second, gathering my thoughts & regaining my composure, before walking towards the bar where the Crüe & Sophia were stood, trying to act as if they hadn’t been watching.

I had barely made it over to them before Nikki was straight in there with his sly comments, immediately trying to get under my skin.

“Aw was Prince Charming not happy to hear the Princess was actually a band slu-“

Nikki didn’t get the chance to finish his insult. He was silenced by the remainder of my drink soaking him as I threw it at him furiously, dousing his arrogance with my cocktail.

“That is for thinking you have any right to chase away a good guy just because your petty, selfish ass is jealous.” I spat. “And this..”

The loud crack of my hand slapping him sharply across the face echoed around the bar, followed by the whooping of Vince & Tommy. I even caught a glimpse of Mick smirking.

Nikki recoiled, his hand flying to his crimson cheek, shock & fury on his face. But his rage couldn’t match mine. I grabbed his face roughly, my hand cupping his chin & cheeks, forcing him to meet my wrathful glare.

“That is for fucking me & leaving me like I was one of your whores.” I seethed, my voice quiet & dangerous.

Nikkis face went from white hot anger to an ice cold stare in an instant as he straightened up, pushing me off of him as he did. He took a step towards me, but I didn’t move an inch. I was way too fucking angry to back down.

“Listen Princess, you’re fucking lucky I’m not a bad guy-“ he began, but my sharp laugh rang loud, cutting him off.

“Not a bad guy?! Nikki, are you really that delusional?! You’ve done nothing but purposely fuck with my head from the day I met you. You’ve insulted me, dragged me down to your level, used me, screwed my chances with two different guys & for what?!” I screamed, tears threatening to form. “No, you know what?! You're fucking lucky Sixx, I’m not gonna do this here. I’m done. I don’t want anything to do with you.”

I span around, ready to make my dramatic exit, when I came face to face with a very happy looking band manager, Doc. He clearly couldn’t care less about our drama as he marched over to us like nothing was happening.

“Bartender, a round of shots for these boys & their girlfriends. We need to celebrate;”

“The fuck are you talking about Doc?” Snapped Nikki, his eyes still fixed on me.

“Boys, you’re in!" He announced, unable to hide his obvious pleased-with-himself smirk "I've just been told that Mötley Crüe have been offered a last minute slot to play alongside the likes of Judas Priest, Scorpions, Van Halen & The Prince of fucking Darkness, Ozzy fucking Osbourne at the US Festival on Memorial Day weekend!” Doc exclaimed, laughing as the band began shouting & whooping, looking disbelieved & excited as hell. Choruses of “are you serious?!” & “you’re fucking kidding!” we’re passed between them as Doc reassured them that they were on their way up.

In that moment, watching these guys I’d grown to love over the last couple of years get the break they worked so hard for, I couldn’t be mad. I watched as Tommy jumped on Nikkis back, Vince hugged Doc & Mick silently smirked to himself. They deserved this.

Doc handed me & Sophia a shot as we congratulated them all, although I couldn’t quite bring myself to share my enthusiasm with Nikki. But he was too busy to notice as he held up his shot glass in a toast.

“To us! We’ve got an old man, a kid drummer, a cover band singer & a fucking run away. Win it all or loose it all, we’re Mötley fucking Crue!” He yelled, his excitement & energy almost infectious, as much as I wanted to hate him.

“To you guys!” Sophia cheered, laughing as we all downed our shots.

“Let’s get another round in, we’re celebrating! And pour one for yourself gorgeous.” Vince called to the barmaid who was more than happy to oblige, blushing as he winked at her, turning on the Vince Neil charm that would assure she’d be going home with him at the end of the night. I remember that well, I chuckled to myself.

The atmosphere of the night had changed so dramatically from what it was 10 minutes previously, everyone’s anger & awkwardness forgotten in the wake of such elating news. I looked around all the happy faces; Vince flirting with the bar maid, Tommy all over a giggling Sophia, Mick & Doc eagerly discussing set lists & felt an overwhelming sense of misplacement. After all that had happened, I just couldn’t bring myself to match their enthusiasm, not tonight.

I noticed Nikki's gaze focused on me, his face betraying his now obvious guilt as he watched me stand alone, uncomfortable & upset. His sudden success had clearly snapped him out of his petty, jealous mood.

Uninterested in an apology from him, I let my eyes continue to scan the room, looking anywhere but at him, when Sophia glanced over, catching my eye & gestured for me to join in. I forced my best smile as I walked over to her & Tommy.

“Take another shot Reynolds!” Tommy shouted, pushing a shot glass of mysterious liquid at me. I laughed politely as I shook my head.

“Thanks, but no thanks T-Bone. I think I’m actually gonna shoot yanno, I’m getting pretty tired.” I lied.

“Beth, don’t leave, please?” Tommy pleaded, his face suddenly serious, moving away from Soph & towards me.

“T-Bone, it’s not a big deal honestly, you guys enjoy your celebrations!”

“Just talk to him. I know the fucker doesn’t deserve it, Beth, I know. But he cares for you more than you think, I promise. We all do.” He added, placing his hand in mine & giving it a squeeze as he flashed me a goofy half smile.

I gave him a half smile & squeezed his hand back. “I know Tommy & I love you guys, I really do. But I can’t be around him, its.. it’s too hard.” I muttered back, so quietly it was almost inaudible above the music playing in the bar. But Tommy caught it.

“You care for him too, don’t you?” He asked, just as quietly.

I nodded, my eyes filling with tears. “God knows why T-Bone, he’s made it clear he doesn’t care about me. I’m just another girl he fucked.” I sniffed, furiously wiping away my tears before anyone noticed.

“Beth, Sixx is a dick. I’ve watched him fuck over chick after chick who was convinced they’d tame him & he tosses them without a second thought. But not you. I don’t know what the fuck goes on in Nikkis head, but that fucker cares about you. So please, don’t ditch us all just because you think he doesn’t.”

“I’m sorry Tom, I know he’s your friend & you wanna see the best in him, but you’re wrong. Nikki Sixx only cares about himself.” I replied, straightening my posture & regaining my composure. I pulled Tommy into a tight hug & congratulated him again. “I’ll see ya around T-Bone, I’m sure.” I winked, gesturing towards Sophia.

He laughed, “I’ll look after her.”

I blew him a kiss before heading towards the door, not wanting to disturb anyone else’s night with my drama.

“Lizzy, wait up.” I heard Nikkis voice call. I closed my eyes briefly, choosing whether to stop or keep going. I chose the latter & walked swiftly out of the door, pretending I hadn’t heard.

But my ignorance was in vain & he was right behind me, following suit out of the bar.

“Nikki please, just go back-“

My sentence was cut short by his lips crashing onto mine. I froze, feeling anger, lust & passion sweep through my body as my brain tried to compute the correct emotional response. I pushed him away sharply, deciding anger overwhelmed any feelings I had towards him.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?! Are you asking for another slap?!”

“Lizzy, I’m sorry ok?” He blurted out, clearly uncomfortable with apologies.

“You’re sorry?! Oh, well that makes everything ok then.” I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes at him.

“I know ok, I fucked up. I’ve been a dick to you & I’m sorry. I just, I don’t know how to do this shit.” He mumbled, running his hands through his tangled hair.

“Do what, Sixx?” My frustration mounting with his half-assed apology.

“I don’t fucking do.. This.” He gestured between the two of us, struggling to find his words.

I sighed with exasperation. “What is this Nikki? Is this an apology or what, because honestly there isn’t much you can say right now, just let me go home.” I finished, turning to leave, but he caught hold of my hand, pulling me into him. He placed his hand gently under my chin, bringing my face up to his.

“I don’t do this, ok? I don’t do feelings or relationships, fuck, I won’t even sleep with a girl twice.” He laughed, before clearing his throat when he saw my unamused expression. “Lizzy, I am sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I got pissed as hell when I saw you with that fucking pretty boy, I snapped.. I don't know, I guess I was kinda jealous.. I do care about you.”

I scoffed. “You’ve got a funny way of showing it.”

“I do, Lizzy. But listening to you telling me why I’m a bad guy, all the shit I’ve done to you, you’re right. And I’m sorry. Just, please don’t leave. Come celebrate with us, we all want you here. I want you here.. You’ve been with us from the start, it wouldn’t feel the same without you. You mean a lot to me... Um, to us. You mean a lot to us.” He corrected.

I looked into his green eyes & saw the sincerity, noted the lack of arrogance in his voice & the absence of his usual smug smile. I so badly wanted to give into him. I wanted to taste his kiss again, melt against him like I always do. I wanted to take his hand & go back inside, enjoy the night with the band, drink, have fun & fall into bed with him when the night was over.

But I’d fell for Nikkis sweeter side before, I knew how the night would end. He’d leave afterwards & I’d be hurt all over again. And I wasn’t gonna let that happen.

“No Nikki, I’m sorry.”

117 notes · View notes

jaxl-road · 4 years

Text

Better Watch Out

Motley Crue and Guns N Roses have a Secret Santa gift exchange. What could go wrong?

Pairings: Nikki/Tommy, Slash/Axl, Duff/Izzy

This beast is over 10,000 words long, just fyi -_-;

(Also on AO3)

~~~~~~~

“WHY are there so many people in our tiny ass apartment?” Nikki groaned, running a hand through his hair.

Axl scoffed, “You guys hold ragers in your ‘tiny ass apartment’ practically every night.”

“Yeah, but I’m usually wasted when that happens. Right now I’m sober.”

“That’s your own fault,” Duff smirked, taking a long sip from his water bottle that everyone was suddenly positive was not filled with water.

Nikki sighed as Tommy skipped over and patted him on the shoulder. Their dilapidated living room was packed full with the members of Motley Crue and Guns N’ Roses. It was late morning, which in Nikki’s opinion was way too early to be dealing with this many rockers in his apartment. Mick and Slash were sitting on the couch, the former looking annoyed and the latter looking calm and content (or in other words, high). Vince sat next to them on the back of the couch, glaring childishly at Axl who was sprawled across the armchair and looking far too at home in the blonde’s opinion. Izzy leaned against the back of the armchair, smirking in the direction of where Duff was standing, the bassist now casually holding his water bottle above his head while Steven tried in vain to snag it. Finally, still standing at the start of the hallway, Tommy threw an arm around Nikki’s shoulder to keep the dark haired man from returning to bed.

“Come on, Nikki, don’t be grumpy!”

“Have you met Nikki?”

“This is gonna be fun!” Tommy grinned, ignoring Slash’s comment, even as Nikki flipped the guitarist off. “Steven had the best idea, so I invited them all over!”

“Ah fuck, the drummers are responsible for this?” Mick leaned his head back dramatically to stare at the ceiling, “This is going to be more annoying than I thought.”

Steven laughed, moving to stand by Tommy and Nikki, “If by ‘annoying’, you mean FUN!”

“I do not.”

“Anyway,” Steven clapped his hands, “We’re gonna do a Secret Santa!”

There was a long pause as all eyes stared at the blonde drummer and processed his words.

Then they all started talking at once.

“What?” Nikki exclaimed.

“Oh Hell no,” Mick muttered.

“Oh Hell YES!” Slash countered.

“Presents? Presents!” Vince’s eyes lit up, “Gimme pretty things! Whoever gets me I have a list for you!”

“This is going to blow up spectacularly, and honestly I’m down for it,” Duff shrugged.

Izzy sighed and leaned his head on his hand, “See I’m torn. I want to watch the chaos, but I don’t want to be involved in the chaos. Dilemmas, dilemmas.”

Axl leaned back, letting his head hang over the arm of his seat. Narrowing his eyes, he pointed at Steven, “I will agree on ONE CONDITION.”

The attention of the room shifted to the red-head. Steven cocked his head curiously, “What?”

“We do this game on hard-mode.”

“I’m going to regret asking,” Mick sighed, “but what’s hard-mode?”

Crossing his arms, Axl answered firmly, “No giving drugs or alcohol as a gift.”

Immediately, there was a riot.

“Oh COME ON!”

“But I WANT drugs and alcohol!”

“These fuckers’ entire personality is based around drugs and alcohol, what the fuck else am I supposed to get them?”

“If I don’t get Vodka, Christmas is cancelled.”

“You can’t just-”

“Izzy, take Christmas away from Axl!”

“It’s cute you think I have any power over him.”

“Hey! HEY!” Tommy shouted, finally getting everyone’s attention and putting a stop to the bickering. “Look, I love drugs as much as the rest of you, but I have to admit, I think it’s a good idea,” he rolled his eyes when several people groaned in response, “It makes it more of a challenge!”

It took a bit of convincing, but eventually the group reluctantly conceded, Axl smirking victoriously. With the rockers appeased, Steven pulled a top hat out of seemingly nowhere.

Slash sat up straight and glared, “Hey! I’ve been looking for that!”

Ignoring him, Steven tossed about the small pieces of paper inside the hat, “Okay, we’ve got everyone’s names written down, so take one and pass it. And no peeking!” As the names got passed around, Steven continued, “So, I don’t think we need a price limit, cause we’re all pretty broke.”

“We know, but hey!” Vince muttered as he took the hat.

“How about we meet up for the exchange one week from today?”

“At your place, next time,” Nikki huffed.

Axl shrugged, “Whatever, fair enough.”

“Cool,” Nikki nodded, “Now get the fuck out of our apartment.”

~~~~~~~

Izzy would be the first to admit that he hadn’t been on board with the whole Secret Santa thing at first. He didn’t dislike Christmas or anything, but he wasn’t a hugely festive person either. So the idea of partaking in a theoretically light-hearted game with a group of hardrockers didn’t exactly appeal to him.

That is, until Duff came home the next day with an armful of Christmas lights.

“Woah,” Slash chuckled as the bassist walked past with strings of lights trailing behind him, “what, did you rob Whoville or something?”

Grinning, Duff opened his arms to let the mass of lights fall onto the ground in the middle of the living room, “I will neither confirm nor deny where I got these.”

“Fuck yeah, I didn’t think we were gonna decorate the place!” Steven smiled excitedly.

Shrugging, Duff looked away, a touch of embarrassment on his face, only noticeable if you were looking (and Izzy was always looking), “I dunno, I wasn’t planning to at first. I never really got into the holidays, even when I was younger. But since we’re doing the Secret Santa thing with the Crue, I figured, why not?”

He smiled so shyly, and Izzy’s heart fluttered.

That was when he realized that he’d been handed the perfect opportunity. Izzy had been crushing on the tall blonde for awhile now, much to Axl’s amusement and Izzy’s torment. But he’d be the first to admit that he wasn’t the best at expressing his feelings, and everytime he had Duff’s full attention he forgot every word he had ever practiced in front of the mirror and ended up chickening out and running away to get high (he’d also tried getting high first, but the results were the same).

So maybe, giving Duff a gift was the perfect way to try to confess his feelings; a way to help take some of the pressure off his words.

And watching Steven and Slash wrap the lights around Duff, seeing him twirl and laugh when they plugged them in, looking at the way the lights reflected in his eyes and illuminated his smile, Izzy knew he was going to need all the help he could get.

~~~~~

If Nikki was going to participate in this Secret Santa bullshit (and not even get any coke out of it) then he was going to fucking give a gift to Tommy and no one else. He had already been trying to psych himself up to do some sort of romantic holiday shit, but the game with the two bands provided a perfect opportunity. The only thing standing in his way was the name scrawled on the scrap of paper in his hand.

Izzy

Leaning heavily on the kitchen table, Nikki steeled himself for the trip he was about to make. It wasn’t like he could judge Guns N’ Roses for their living situation, given the squalor Motley Crue currently called a home, but it always felt weird seeing them by himself. He didn’t like being outnumbered.

But from what he could tell, neither Vince nor Mick had Tommy’s name (if they did, they’d be teasing him incessantly)(he still didn’t understand how his feelings managed to be so blatant to Vince and Mick while still going right over Tommy’s head). So that meant someone in the other band had his drummer’s name, and he was going to get it if it was the last thing he did.

~~~~~

It was weird for anyone to knock on their door when the sun was still out, Slash thought as he cautiously made his way to the entrance. Cracking the door open, wondering if any of the idiots he lived with had done anything worth a house visit from the cops lately, he was instead met with the wild black hair and smudged eyeliner of none other than the very person he was tasked with finding a gift for.

“Oh,” the guitarist blinked in surprise, opening the door wider, “What’s up Sixx? Wasn’t expecting you.”

“No one ever expects me. My presence is either surprising or disappointing, but never anticipated.”

Rolling his eyes, Slash moved aside to let the other man inside, “Yeah, yeah, whatever you drama queen.”

“I don’t think you can call me a drama queen in good faith when you live with fucking Axl.”

“You got me there,” he chuckled, “But seriously, what brings you to our humble Hell House?”

Sighing heavily, Nikki cut straight to the chase, “Did you get Tommy’s name for the Secret Santa?”

Slash raised an eyebrow, “I thought this thing was supposed to be, you know… secret?”

“Oh fuck off,” Nikki huffed, “No one in Crue has it, which means someone here does, and I fucking want it.”

“Why?”

“…Cause.”

“Ooooooh,” a slow grin spread on the guitarist’s face, “I get it.”

“Don’t-”

“You’ve got a cru~ush~” he sang teasingly.

“Shut up!” Nikki shoved him lightly, his cheeks reddening as he scowled.

Slash laughed, “Okay, okay, jeez! To be honest I assumed you guys were already a thing. Like, sometimes I can’t tell where one of you ends and the other begins. It’s super gross.” He gave an exaggerated shudder.

“Oh please, you and Axl are always fucking hanging off each other.”

Sputtering, Slash gaped, “We do not!”

Blinking, Nikki raised his eyebrows in surprise, “Holy shit. Don’t tell me you two aren’t actually a couple.”

“Keep your voice down, he’s in the other room!”

“Holy shit! And you were fucking with me about Tommy!”

“Shhhhhh!” Slash covered the bassist mouth with his hands, “Okay, alright, we’re both lovesick idiots. I’ll tell you who has Tommy’s name and then we can both never speak of this again, deal?”

Smirking, Nikki pushed his hands away, “Deal.”

Nodding, Slash crossed his arms, “I heard Axl complaining about having to shop for ‘fucking sunshine drummers’.”

“Let’s be real, that could mean Tommy or Steven,” Nikki pointed out.

Slash shrugged, “If it had been Steven he wouldn’t have kept his voice down.”

“You know what? That’s fair.” Nodding decisively, he turned to walk into the next room, “Thanks man.”

“Yeah, yeah…”

Turning the corner, Nikki found himself in a small, dingy kitchen, empty save for the red-headed singer sitting on the counter. He was kicking his legs back and forth, a mug in one hand and a book in his lap. He looked so peaceful and innocent, but Nikki knew better than to let his guard down around the little terror.

Point made when the singer’s head snapped up as he entered, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“Good to see you too, Rose.”

Axl’s only response was to quirk an eyebrow, so Nikki sighed, “Look, I need a favor.”

That made Axl’s eyes light up in interest, “Oh?”

Yeah, Nikki was gonna be fucked. Asking Axl for a favor was like making a deal with the devil. But, well, desperate fucking times and all. “Yeah,” he glanced away, “I heard you got Tommy’s name for the Secret Santa. Is that true?”

“Maybe,” Axl drawled, placing his mug and book to the side so he could lean forward and give Nikki his full attention, “What of it?”

“I want to trade.”

“Hm,” the singer considered for a minute. Finally he jerked his head at the bassist, “Whose name did you get?”

“Izzy,” he replied, “He’s like, your best friend, right? So it’s perfect.”

Axl snorted, “I don’t like him that much.” He tilted his head side to side as he thought. Nikki held his breath, hoping to God that this could just be simple. But when Axl grinned slowly at him, he knew that he’d have no such luck.

“I’ll tell you what,” he offered, “I’ll give you Tommy, if you get me Slash.”

For a long minute, Nikki could only blink. Finally, he deadpanned, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” If he wasn’t certain that one or both of them would murder him on the spot, he’d just drag Slash in here right now and tell them to bang or whatever. But he was, in fact, certain that one or both of them would murder him on the spot. So.

“That’s my offer, take it or leave it,” Axl shrugged.

Goddamn pining idiots. “Ugh, fine!” Nikki threw his arms up in exasperation. He was pretty sure he knew who had Slash’s name, but it was going to be annoying as fuck.

Axl snickered as he stomped out of the house, shoving past Steven without a word. “What was that about?” The drummer questioned.

“Oh, you know,” Axl grinned, “just the holidays, bringing people together.”

~~~~~~

Izzy sighed from his spot outside the liquor store, pulling his jacket tighter around his body as he took a long drag from his cigarette. The slip of paper with Mick written on it weighed heavy in his pocket. He’d been eavesdropping on his bandmates, and as far as he could tell none of them had Duff’s name. The idea of trekking over to Motley Crue and asking one of them to trade made him wince.

Speak of the devil though. As he ground his cigarette under his heel, he saw a tall, curly haired drummer make his way over.

“Oh! Hey Izzy!” Tommy grinned, “Fancy meeting you here!”

“Yeah,” Izzy shrugged, “Just grabbing a couple things. Too lazy to go all the way to the market.”

“I know that feeling,” Tommy laughed.

Eyeing him carefully, Izzy tried to keep his voice casual as he asked impulsively, “So, how’s the Secret Santa shopping going?”

To his surprise, Tommy’s face fell a little, “Oh, it’s fine. I don’t really know what to get them though,” he rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled to himself, “I was kind of hoping to get a different bassist…”

No fucking way.

Izzy gaped for a moment. What were the odds? He never got this lucky! “You got Duff?” He blurted out.

“Ah, fuck, it’s supposed to be a secret,” Tommy floundered.

“No, no, it’s cool!” Izzy was quick to calm him, “You want Nikki’s name, right?”

“Yeah,” the drummer admitted. Then he lit up, “Do you have his name?”

“Well, no…” Izzy confessed, “But, I was hoping to get Duff. So maybe we could…?” He trailed off, looking at the taller man expectantly.

Looking at the drummer though you’d think Izzy just kicked his puppy, “I really want Nikki though. He like, never celebrated Christmas, and sometimes the holidays make him sad, and I don’t want him to be sad, so I just want to get him something special, y’know?”

Yes. Izzy did know, because he was in a very similar situation. Sighing, he pinched the bridge of his nose, “Right. Okay. If I can get Nikki’s name though, you’ll trade with me?”

Perking back up, Tommy nodded enthusiastically, “Absolutely, dude!”

Nodding firmly in response, Izzy agreed, “Alright. It’s a deal.”

~~~~~~~~

“Please?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No!”

“Pleeeeeeease?”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Mick slammed his magazine down, glaring at the bassist across from him, “Why the fuck do you want to trade so bad?”

“Because,” Nikki whined, “Why do you even care? You’re probably just going to get something generic no matter whose name you get.”

“It’s the principle of the matter,” Mick insisted.

“Come on, do you really want to deal with me annoying you over something that you couldn’t care less about? For that matter, do you really want me to bug you with all the bullshit details of why I need Slash’s name?”

“Fuck,” the guitarist muttered, even as he moved to rummage through his pockets, “I’ve been spending too much time around you crazy fuckers, ‘cause you’re starting to make sense.” He slapped the paper down, snatching the one Nikki offered in exchange, “You still owe me though.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll find some way to make it up to you,” Nikki grinned, jumping from his seat and running for the door, “Thanks, man!”

“Fuck you.”

~~~~~~~~

The club was packed, bodies pressing together and jumping to the beat of the loud, angry music. Slash sat at the bar with Duff and Axl, Steven and Izzy running late. Guns N Roses didn’t see Motley Crue perform too often, but apparently Nikki needed to meet up with Axl because of their Secret Santa bullshit, and the others tagged along out of habit. Slash figured it might give him some inspiration for what to get the bassist, anyway. The petty part of him wanted to tell him that directing him to Tommy’s name was his gift, but that felt cheap even for him.

But what the fuck did Nikki Sixx want, other than drugs and to fuck his drummer?

The crowd cheered loudly as the four rockers finished their set, making their way off stage as the next band began to set up. Axl chugged the rest of his drink, nodding at the others as he made his way towards the stage, presumably to meet up with Nikki. He and Duff chatted for a bit until the bassist was distracted by the bartender blatantly flirting. Slash rolled his eyes. He knew without a doubt that the tall blonde only had eyes for one person, but he was also the king of playing it up to get free drinks and, well, no one could fault him for that.

“Hey Slash!”

Turning at the sound of his name, he grinned as Tommy and Vince stumbled over to him, “Hey guys! Great show!”

“Thanks!”

“Hang on, I think I see a challenge,” Vince grinned deviously, abandoning Tommy and Slash in favor of competing with Duff for the bartender’s attention.

Slash snorted, shaking his head in amusement, “That’s not going to end well.”

Tommy laughed, swaying from alcohol or coke or both as he leaned against the bar and pushed sweaty curls out of his face, “Vince will be fine. If this doesn’t work out he’ll find another chick and be right as rain,” he waved his hand dismissively.

“Yeah, and I don’t think Duff will be heartbroken either.”

Sighing heavily, Tommy nodded, “Yeah, Duff’s a cool guy.” Biting his lip, he glanced away almost guiltily, “I feel bad for trying to trade his name away for the Santa thing…”

Slash blinked in surprise, “You got Duff?”

“Oh, Goddamn it!” Tommy exclaimed, “I am so bad at this fucking secret thing…”

Laughing, Slash patted his shoulder consolingly, “Hey man, it’s no biggie. Whose name are you trying to get, anyway?” He had a feeling he already knew.

Sure enough, Tommy sighed dreamily, “Nikki. He’s so great, y’know? And I just want to give him something special and nice so he knows I…. y’know,” he waved his hand vaguely.

Snorting, Slash reached into his pocket, “Oh, I know,” holding a hand out, Slash took pity on the kid. What could he say? The Terror Twins were fucking adorable. No matter how much he teased Nikki, he honestly didn’t mind helping them along.

Tommy blinked in confusion as he took Slash’s offering. When he saw what it was, his whole face lit up, smiling so wide it was practically blinding, “Dude! Seriously?!”

“Yup,” He motioned with his hand, and Tommy scrambled to give him his own paper, “Tidings of joy or whatever bullshit. Go get ‘em, tiger.”

“Seriously, dude, you’re the best!” Tommy wrapped the guitarist in a bone crushing hug, nearly knocking the wind out of him.

“Yeah, it’s cool, really, please, I can’t breath.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Izzy and Steven made it to the club during Motley Crue’s last song. Izzy had stopped by the house to change after working, finding Steven asleep on the couch. After shaking him awake (the drummer had completely forgotten about the group’s evening plans) they both made their way to the venue.

Despite snooping around, Izzy could not figure out who had Nikki’s name. He was starting to think someone from Crue must have it, or worse, Duff, which would make for an awkward affair if the blonde wanted to know why he wanted to trade. So he made up his mind to just grovel to the best of his ability and get Tommy to trade with him anyway.

The crowds, mixed with the loud music and the flashing lights made it hard to find anyone. Izzy and Steven eventually got separated, and he ran into Vince, who was too busy cozying up to a busty brunette to pay him much mind. For the first hour or so, he drifted around the floor, listening to the current band, occasionally snagging freebies from the rare fans who recognized him. Tired, and assuming that the Crue had already made their way back to their apartment for an afterparty, he made his way to the bar. As soon as he arrived, he flagged down the bartender and took two shots in quick succession, impatient to get a pleasant buzz going.

Looking across the bar, he finally found familiar faces. Duff was obviously well on his way to wasted, laughing at something with Axl, Slash, and Steven. Quickly slipping over to them, his bandmates greeted him enthusiastically.

“Izzy! We were wondering where you disappeared to!” Steven exclaimed.

“We missed you, buddy!” Duff grinned and slung an arm around Izzy’s waist and okay, screw Tommy, he wasn’t moving from this spot for the rest of the night. He pointedly ignored Axl’s knowing look and the conversation picked back up, the five friends laughing cheerfully and Duff’s hand warm on his hip.

He’d deal with the Secret Santa thing tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~

This was not supposed to be this hard.

Nikki had been wracking his brains on what to get Tommy. It needed to be something heartfelt, something Tommy would understand was supposed to be special, but still simple enough that he could give it to the drummer in front of the two bands. Ultimately, he decided that something homemade would be perfect- Tommy would lose his shit over Nikki putting actual time and effort into his gift.

That was how Nikki found himself in Motley Crue’s kitchen at 10am trying- and seriously, emphasis on trying- to bake cookies.

He had a limited window where he had the apartment to himself, and immediately took advantage of it. Baking supplies had been hidden in his room for the last day to keep the others from giving him shit or finding out his plan. The bag of chocolate chips had a recipe on the back, and Nikki could fucking read, so he figured it’d be easy.

The problem started when he realized that while he had purchased ingredients, he had forgotten to consider that their apartment was almost completely devoid of actual baking equipment. The biggest ‘bowl’ they had was an old metal pot, and he was forced to stir with a soup spoon.

Measuring was also tricky, since he hadn’t even thought about picking up measuring cups or anything. But hey, how hard could it be to eyeball it? They had cups, he could fill it halfway just fine.

Judging by the smoke coming out of the oven, it was not fine at all.

Sighing in frustration, Nikki scraped the paper thin and charred pastries into the sink. He had his fingers crossed for the next batch, saying a quick prayer to whoever was listening as he scooped them sloppily and slid them into the oven, not bothering to wait for the single sheet pan they owned to cool down.

He was standing impatiently in the middle of the kitchen when someone pounded on the door. Furrowing his brows, he didn’t know who to expect. People usually only knocked if they were there about a noise complaint, but the apartment was currently silent.

Opening the door, he was faced with a tired and hungover looking Izzy Stradlin.

The bassist had barely opened his mouth before Izzy was cutting him off, “I just need to talk to Tommy real quick.”

Raising an eyebrow, Nikki crossed his arms, “Why?”

“Because,” he ran a hand over his face, “Look, can I just-” he stopped suddenly, finally taking in the man in front of him, “Why the fuck are you covered in cocaine?”

Blinking in confusion, Nikki looked down at himself before sighing at the sight of his flour covered shirt, “It’s not cocaine. You know I’d never waste coke like this,” he gestured at himself.

“Then what-” Izzy paused again, this time his eyes widening as he glanced over Nikki’s shoulder, “-the FUCK is going on in your kitchen?!”

Spinning around, Nikki cursed loudly at the sight of black smoke wafting from the other room. Sprinting to the oven, he threw the door open, coughing when a wave of smoke billowed out. He snatched a dish towel and recklessly grabbed the tray of cookies, throwing the whole thing into the sink. Izzy, who had run up behind him, quickly reached over and flipped the faucet on, steam mixing with the smoke until the entire kitchen was in a haze.

Both rockers coughed and sputtered, waving their hands around their faces. “What the actual fuck, dude!” Izzy cried incredulously, “Were you cooking meth or something?”

Groaning, Nikki dropped his head onto the counter roughly, letting his hair hide the tears of frustration that threatened to well over, “I fucking wish.”

Glancing around the disaster zone of the kitchen, Izzy slowly pieced together what had happened, “Were you… baking?”

“Well I was trying!” Nikki shouted, tugging at his hair and still face down on the counter, “But I’m such a fuckup I can’t even do something as simple as make a fucking batch of fucking cookies without it literally going up in fucking flames!”

Okay, so Izzy definitely had not anticipated this when he came over. Hesitantly, he reached out to pat Nikki awkwardly on the back, “Um. There, there?” He glanced around helplessly, “Where the fuck is the rest of your band, maybe one of them could help with…”

“They’re not here right now,” Nikki finally straightened up, looking utterly miserable, “Vince is shacking up with whatever girl of the week he’s got, Mick is dealing with his ex, and Tommy’s at work.”

Izzy took a deep breath through his nose, trying to resist tearing his hair out, “Right. Okay, I’ll… make you a deal,” he grit out. How many fucking deals was he going to have to make this week?

“What?” Nikki mumbled.

“I’ll help you salvage your baking project if you tell me where Tommy works so I can fucking talk to him.”

“Really?” the bassist looked at him wide eyed and hopeful, “You’ll help? And not fucking tell anyone?” he tacked on with a glare.

“Yes, yes, whatever, let’s just do this so I can get out of here,” he looked around, “Where are your measuring cups?”

“Um…”

Izzy pinched the bridge of his nose. Lord have mercy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Steven hummed to himself from his spot laying on the couch in their living room. In his pocket was a scrap of paper with Axl scrawled on it. The drummer wanted so badly to get him something good- the singer was his best friend! Well, okay so maybe he considered all the members of Guns N’ Roses his best friend. And okay, maybe there was room for him and Axl to be better friends, but that was why this Secret Santa gift was important! It was a chance for Steven to build their relationship a little more. The problem was, he had no idea what Axl would want. He’d been wracking his brain all morning, but nothing felt right.

At that moment, laughter rang out from the kitchen, light and carefree, “Hey! Get your own!” Steven could hear the smile in Axl’s voice.

Hopping to his feet, he peeked around the corner into the kitchen. Axl was indeed smiling, no matter how hard he tried to look annoyed. Slash was grinning widely as he held a mug of coffee just out of the red-head’s reach, “Sharing is caring, Sweetheart!”

Axl was pressed against the guitarist’s back, his chin resting on Slash’s shoulder as he stretched his arms out to try to reach the mug Slash held in front of him. When Slash finally broke away, rushing to take two large gulps of the coffee, Axl gasped in exaggerated offense, “You asshole! It’s not sharing if you don’t leave any for me!”

Slash laughed, “I’ll give you more of the next mug.”

“Oh no, you wanted my cup? Fine,” the singer rushed to the coffee maker, grabbing the entire pot and holding it to his chest, “But THIS is mine!”

“What! No way! I can’t survive on one cup of coffee!”

“Serves you right!” Axl ran out of the kitchen, shouting between childlike laughs as Slash chased after him, complaining loudly even as his face showed nothing but joy. Listening to the two musicians as their voices rang through the house, Steven was struck by inspiration, a grin spreading slowly across his face.

He knew what to get Axl for Christmas.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Tommy sighed as another stack of plates was placed next to him, grabbing the first one to start scraping off excess food. God, he couldn’t wait until Motley Crue started making enough that they could all quit their shitty jobs. Washing dishes all day wasn’t that bad, but it wasn’t how he wanted to spend his day, either. He tossed his head back, trying to get a strand of hair that had come loose from his ponytail out of his face, when he heard some sort of commotion out in the restaurant.

He didn’t think much of it at first, shitty customers weren’t that uncommon. But then the voices started getting closer.

“Sir, you cannot go back there-”

“I’ll just be a minute.”

“Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave-”

“Yeah, yeah, in a minute.”

The voices were right outside the door, and just as Tommy turned, Izzy Stradlin burst in, followed closely by one of the managers. The guitarist looked frazzled, his hair a wild mess, dark circles under his eyes, and what looked like some sort of batter smeared on his shirt.

“Tommy! Fucking finally,” Izzy muttered, steadfastly ignoring the manager that was still trying to talk to him.

“Izzy? What the Hell are you-”

“Look, I have no idea who has Nikki’s name. Can you please just switch with me? I’ll owe you one or whatever, just do this one favor for me.”

Blinking slowly, it took Tommy a moment to figure out what Izzy was talking about. When he finally caught up, he winced, “Oooooh fuck.” Izzy stared at him, the manager still standing to the side just watching. “Um,” Tommy shuffled awkwardly, “I actually….”

“What?”

Gulping nervously, Tommy finally spit it out, “I don’t have Duff’s name anymore.“

Silence stretched for a long minute, Izzy staring blankly while Tommy’s manager looked back and forth between them in confusion. Finally, Izzy slowly stalked forward and Tommy was pretty sure he was about to get murdered.

Izzy stopped just inches away from him, “Who does?”

~~~~~~~~~~

“Slash, I need you to make out with Axl.”

Sputtering, Slash practically spit out his water in surprise and dismay, “What? Why??”

Taking a deep breath, Steven explained, “Okay, so I got Axl for the Secret Santa, right?” Slash opened his mouth, but Steven barreled on before he could speak, “And I want to get him something good, cause I love the dude. And I couldn’t figure out what to get him, cause like, what does Axl even want? But then I realized, he wants you!” Grinning widely, Steven didn’t even register the deep shade of red blooming across Slash’s face, “I’m pretty sure he wants you more than anything. So for his gift I figured I’d get you to kiss him! So will you do it? Please?”

Swallowing thickly, Slash brought one hand up, pushing his hair to try to hide his flaming face, “I- Um- …Hang on, I need to process this.”

Thankfully, Steven was happy to stand patiently while Slash’s brain rebooted. Logically, the guitarist knew on some level that his feelings for the red-head were mutual. At least, he hoped. After all, who’s to say their flirtation wasn’t just a friendly joke to Axl? He’d always been too anxious about being rejected to make any sort of blatant move; to do anything that didn’t have some element of plausible deniability.

But… Nikki had thought that they were already a couple. And now Steven was saying Axl wanted him. And, well…

That had to mean something, right?

Inhaling deeply, Slash finally met Steven’s gaze, “Okay. So. I see what you’re saying. But our Secret Santa gifts are going to be exchanged in front of a group, and do you really think Axl would appreciate me kissing him in front of an audience?” Just saying it had Slash’s blush reigniting.

Steven’s face fell, “Oh, I hadn’t thought of that.”

“Yeah. But… why don’t we trade names? And I’ll, uh, kiss Axl after the gift exchanged,” Jesus Christ he felt like a middle schooler. Fucking Axl messing with his fucking emotions.

The drummer hummed in consideration, “… You’ll tell him I helped though? Because I still want you making out with him to be my gift to him.”

“Fucking Hell, yes I’ll let you take credit if everything works out, so just stop talking and give me his damn name!”

Laughing, Steven swapped paper with the guitarist, “My work here is done.”

~~~~~~~~~

Axl glared at nothing as he stalked down the street. He was a fucking idiot. Why had he gone to the trouble of getting Slash’s name for the Secret Santa when he didn’t even know what the fuck to get him? He knew the type of shit the guitarist liked, and so in theory getting him a gift shouldn’t be that hard. But he wanted to give the other man a gift that would say something. Something that would maybe help… push things forward.

Unless Slash didn’t actually like Axl that way. In which case Axl needed to be able to laugh and say he was overthinking it. Plausible deniability and all.

Sighing, he wandered into another shop. This one seemed mostly full of novelties and souvenirs for tourists. He drifted aimlessly, kicking himself for getting into this situation and debating about just trading Slash’s name away to someone. But just as he was turning to leave the store, eyes burning with hopelessness, something caught his eye.

Picking up the item, he considered it carefully. It wasn’t some intimate symbol or heartfelt offering, but that almost made it better. Just something simple that would make Slash laugh and maybe hint at something more. Smiling, he swallowed back the lingering nervousness long enough to place the item on the counter to buy it.

~~~~~~~~~~

Slash kneeled on the floor, rifling through the single drawer of the coffee table in the living room. He was pretty sure he’d seen a spool of thread in there at one point…

There was a bundle of fabric shoved under the guitarist’s mattress in his room which had been there for almost two months now. The pattern had jumped out at him when he had passed a small stand where an older woman had been selling various crafts and knick-knacks on the street. At the time, he’d had no idea what to do with it, even as he shoved some crumpled bills into the woman’s hands and snatched the fabric. But he knew that he would kick himself later if he didn’t get it.

Months later and sure enough, he was so glad he had. He only needed to do a little bit of simple stitching for what he had in mind, nothing he hadn’t helped his mom with a million times. Now if he could just find that thread…

Suddenly, the front door slammed open. Jumping in surprise, Slash turned to see a frazzled looking Izzy. He barely had a chance to even process what was happening before the other man was stalking towards him, his teeth clenched as he practically collapsed onto his knees next to him.

“Slash,” he ground out, “I know Tommy traded you Duff’s name and I need you to give it to me so I can buy that giraffe bastard a fucking Christmas gift, okay?”

Oh boy. “Um…” Slash would love to tease his bandmate for his crush, but the situation felt a bit… volatile. Gulping nervously as he looked into Izzy’s hard eyes, he admitted, “I actually don’t have Duff’s name. I traded it for-”

“WhAT?!”

In the blink of an eye, Izzy was standing, hands fisted in the front of Slash’s shirt. Slash squeaked in surprise as he was dragged off the floor until their faces were inches apart. “What do you mean you traded it??” Izzy shouted.

“Holy shit, man,” Slash stared wide-eyed at his band mate, stumbling to steady himself and gripping Izzy’s wrists uselessly, “I-”

“Who the FUCK did you trade it to?” Izzy actually shook him, his eyes manic as he tried to shake the information out of the other man, “Who has Duff’s name now??”

“Steven! I traded with Steven! Fuck!”

“What’s going on? I heard my name?”

The drummer didn’t know what to expect, especially after walking in on what looked like Izzy threatening Slash. But before he could process what was happening, Izzy’s eyes snapped to look at him. Steven felt like a deer in the headlights, and in mere seconds Izzy had opened his hands, letting Slash drop unceremoniously to the ground with a ‘thud’ and an ‘oof!’, before full on sprinting and tackling Steven to the floor.

Shrieking, the two musicians tumbled to the ground, Izzy grabbing Steven’s shirt as he pinned him down, “Steven I swear to fuck if you tell me you traded Duff’s name-”

“No, no, I have it! I have it!” Steven blurted out in a panic, scrambling to pull the paper from his pocket.

Snatching the name from his hand, Izzy released him, standing shakily as he looked down at paper, “Fucking finally,” he muttered to himself. He reached into his own pocket and carelessly let it drift down onto Steven’s chest before walking away, slamming the door to his bedroom behind him.

Steven and Slash stood shakily, eyeing the closed door warily.

“What… the fuck?” Steven breathed, turning wide eyes to Slash, who only threw his hands up defensively.

“Fuck dude, I have no fucking clue. This Secret Santa thing is driving everyone crazy.”

“Ah man, am I gonna be the only one with no one to make out with after this thing?” the drummer pouted, leaning down to pick up his new name assignment from where it had fallen onto the floor, “I mean, I guess I wouldn’t mind kissing Mick.”

Slash snorted, shaking his head in amusement. He froze when he noticed Steven seriously considering the paper in his hand, “Stevie, no. Do NOT kiss Mick. We all love the dude, but we wouldn’t find your body after.”

Rolling his eyes, Steven laughed, “Haha, Dude, I’m just kidding,” he glanced back down at the name, “…unless?”

“Steven NO!”

~~~~~~~

Opening the door quietly, Tommy glanced around the apartment. Seeing that the coast was clear, he quickly entered, cradling his gift carefully in his hand. The door to Nikki’s room was closed, music blasting from within, so Tommy was able to sneak past easily and slip into his own room.

He hoped that Nikki understood his gift. The bassist tried to shrug it off, scoffing whenever the subject came up, but Tommy could tell the holidays were hard for him. It hurt Tommy’s heart to see the other man struggle, and he wouldn’t even really talk about it. The most the drummer got was some drunken muttering on the nights Nikki got really fucked up, but never enough for him to really get it off his chest and feel better, so he always awoke the next morning just as melancholy and frustrated and distant.

Sighing, Tommy placed his gift gently on the table next to his bed. Maybe it was far fetched, but he loved Nikki. He just hoped his present would communicate that.

~~~~~~~

Izzy was collapsed face down on his mattress, the same spot he’d been in for the last hour. When this week had started, he had not anticipated having to go through so much trouble to get his crush’s name. But it would all be worth it when he gave him his gift and-

His eyes snapped open.

Oh fuck.

He hadn’t gotten Duff a fucking gift yet.

~~~~~~~~

Sighing in relief, Duff finally made it home after a hellish double-shift. All he wanted to do was crawl into bed and pass out. He had finished his gift for Steven a few days after they all drew names, and he felt confident the drummer would like his gift when he got it the next night. When he walked into the living room, he waved tiredly at Steven, who was smoking lazily on the couch.

“Hey man,” the drummer nodded at him.

“Hey,” Duff sat next to him, leaning his head back, “Any crazy plans for tonight?”

Steven shrugged, “Nah, I need to figure out what to do for the Secret Santa thing.”

Duff snorted, “You’ve had a week and you’re doing this the night before?”

“It’s not my fault!” Steven whined, “I had to switch names last second.” He crossed his arms with a huff, and before Duff could question what he was talking about, the drummer muttered, “Izzy must’ve gotten you something really good, he wanted your name really bad.”

There was a long stretch of silence.

When Steven finally looked up, he immediately straightened in his seat, eyes widening at the sight of Duff’s pale face, “Dude? What’s wrong, are you ok-”

“Izzy got me for the exchange?” the bassist asked weakly.

“Well, I mean, he does now? He pretty much forced me to give it to him and-”

Duff stood abruptly, Steven following after him with his hands out because honestly Duff looked a little like he was going to pass out, “Oh my God. Oh my God, Izzy is going to give me something. I don’t have anything for him!”

“That’s okay, it’s okay!” Steven desperately tried to soothe him, “You’re only supposed to give a gift to your assigned person, so-”

“No!” Duff’s fingers curled into his own hair, eyes wide and panicky, “Izzy is getting me a gift! He- he deliberately got my name and I don’t have anything for him! That is not okay!”

“Fuck, okay, Duff, just breathe, okay? Oh God, please don’t cry! Duff if you start crying then I’m gonna start crying!”

Just then, the front door opened. Axl blinked in surprise, eyes darting between Steven and Duff and immediately rushing forward in concern, “What the Hell is going on? Why do you both look like you’re going to cry? Do I need to punch someone??”

Duff covered his face with his hands, “I fucked up and now Izzy is going to fucking hate me!”

“No, he’s not!” Steven insisted, rubbing Duff’s back as he turned to Axl, “Izzy has Duff’s name for the Secret Santa and now Duff is freaking out because he doesn’t have a gift for Izzy.”

Axl furrowed his brow in confusion, “But if you don’t have Izzy’s name then you weren’t supposed to get him a gift?”

“Fuck that!” Duff cried, “It- it’s Izzy! I can’t take something from him without giving him something back! He’ll think I don’t care!” His chest was heaving, “Oh my God, I can’t breathe, he’s going to think I don’t care, I can’t breathe, I’m dying-”

Scrambling, Steven and Axl gently pushed Duff back onto the couch, sitting on either side of him, “Duff, Duff, don’t think about that right now, just breathe okay? In and out, just copy us,” Axl’s deep voice was soft and comforting, Steven’s hand on his back grounding him as the two musicians beside him took exaggerated breaths.

As air finally started to reach his lungs, Duff wiped at his face roughly, “Fuck. Sorry.”

“Hey, you’re fine dude,” Steven insisted, Axl nodding in agreement. They were both a little shaken- they knew that Duff could get anxious, and he’d told them that he had had panic attacks before, but they’d never witnessed one before. Still, they managed to keep it together while Duff calmed down.

“Okay, so I still say you have nothing to worry about,” Axl began, “but if it will help, I know Nikki had Izzy’s name to start.”

“And I know no one in the house has his name,” Steven added, “So it’s definitely with someone in the Crue!”

Nodding, Duff took another deep breath, “Okay. Okay, so I’ll just go over, and switch, and… and figure out something to give him… tomorrow…” he ran a hand over his face, “Fuck.”

“It’ll be fine, you’ve totally got this!” Steven encouraged.

“Right. Fuck, I’m wasting time, I need to go,” Standing, Duff took a few steps towards the front door before stopping, turning on his heel and rushing into the room he shared with Steven. He emerged moments later with a paper bag clutched in his hand.

“What’s that?” Steven asked.

“Nothing. See ya,” And with that, Duff was running out the door.

Turning slowly towards Axl, Steven bit his lip nervously, “Should we…?”

Sighing, the red-head stood, “Yeah, probably.” The two men quickly ran out the door after the bassist, following after him down the street. Because they were good fucking friends.

~~~~~~~~~

Slash returned home after making a run to the liquor store and found the house dark, empty, and quiet. He glanced around in confusion, raising his hands in dismay.

“Where the fuck is everybody?”

~~~~~~~~~

“Maybe speed it up just a little?”

“I think the issue is more with the key than the speed,” Mick argued. Tommy hummed in consideration while Nikki made a few notes in his notebook. Motley Crue was crammed in their usual corner of the apartment dedicated to their band practice.

“Well, let’s start with a key change and then see how we feel,” Nikki decided. The others nodded in agreement, but before they could start playing, they all jumped as someone started pounding on their door.

“NIKKI!” A voice yelled, “Nikki, let me in!!”

All eyes snapped to the bassist, “What the fuck did you do, Sixx?” Vince questioned accusingly.

“I didn’t do anything!” Nikki replied, huffing defensively.

The pounding at the door suddenly stopped, and the four rockers heard more voices from outside, “Jesus fuck, Duff, will you please calm down?”

“Should we do another breathing exercise?”

“I’m fucking FINE, I just-”

Finally, Nikki hesitantly opened the door, revealing three fifths of Guns N Roses standing on his doorstep. “Uuuuuh… hi?”

“Nikki!” Duff exclaimed with relief, “Do you know who has Izzy’s name for the Secret Santa?”

“Mother fucker.”

Mick’s voice was more resigned than annoyed, and Duff immediately gave him his attention, “Mick do you have it? Can you-”

“Yes, fuck, whatever, I don’t care!” the guitarist threw his arms in the air in exasperation.

Beaming, Duff quickly jogged over, swapping scraps of paper and also handing Mick the paper bag he had brought with him.

Raising an eyebrow, Mick looked at it suspiciously, “What’s this?”

“Oh, I already had a gift, so you can just give it to him instead.”

“Hell yeah, that makes my life easier.”

“It was the least I could do,” Duff shrugged.

“Great, this has been fun,” Vince rolled his eyes, “Now get out, we’re busy being a better band than you guys.”

“Excuse me?!” Axl stepped forward, fists clenched and ready to go, but Duff swiftly wrapped his arms around his waist and lifted him off the floor. “Hey!!” the singer struggled, arms still reaching out as if he could get a hit in from his current position.

Duff nodded at the four men, “Thanks again. See you guys tomorrow!”

Calling out their farewells, Vince snickered as Axl cried out “This isn’t over, asshole!” just as the door closed behind them.

Nikki shook his head, “I get the feeling that tomorrow is going to be interesting.”

~~~~~~~~~~

By the time the two bands piled into the living room of the Hell House, every single one of them was some level of buzzed. Slash and Steven had smoked a bit earlier in the evening, Nikki, Tommy, and Vince had done a few lines, and the drinks were flowing early. Duff didn’t even bother with pretense this time, a bottle of Vodka held loosely in his hand.

“Man, we should have decorated the apartment!” Tommy pouted as he admired the Christmas lights that had been tossed around and hung haphazardly in the living room, Duff smiling proudly from his seat. Axl, Izzy, Vince, and Steven were pressed close together on the couch, Mick taking the only chair, while the rest of the group sat on the floor. The coffee table was piled up with their shoddily wrapped gifts in the middle of their circle.

“Alright, who’s starting this thing?” Nikki questioned.

For a moment, everyone was silent, each person looking around and waiting for someone else to volunteer. “Oh for fucks sake,” Axl rolled his eyes, “Steven, this whole thing was your idea, so you get to start.”

“Sure!” Steven grinned widely, reaching into the pile to grab a paper bag with a very familiar shape, “Merry Christmas, Mick!”

“Hey, wait a sec-” Axl protested.

Opening the bag, no one was surprised to see the bottle of vodka inside. There was a chorus of complaints, Nikki slamming his hands on the coffee table, “Dude, we said no alcohol!”

But the drummer only smirked mischievously, “That’s the real gift,” he explained, “My present to Mick is saying ‘fuck it’ to the rules.”

The group went silent, all of them considering his words. “Damn,” Slash muttered, “That’s actually pretty good.”

Even Mick couldn’t hold back a small smirk, nodding in appreciation, “I dig it. Thanks, drummer,” he raised the bottle with a nod of thanks, and Steven pumped his fist in victory. Slash mentally sighed in relief that at least the drummer hadn’t tried to kiss the man.

“Let’s just go clockwise, now,” Tommy suggested, “So Mick, you’re up next!”

“Well, surprise, surprise,” the older man rolled his eyes, “I got Steven. So here,” he grabbed the bag Duff had given him the day before, pushing it into the blonde’s arms.

Opening the bad excitedly, Steven gasped in excitement. He pulled out a pair of drumsticks, the handles covered in dark swirls and designs which, upon closer observation, looked like they had been practically carved on with ballpoint pen. “These are awesome! Thanks, ‘Mick’,” he looked at the guitarist first, before smiling at Duff. Slash and Izzy exchanged silent glances. Neither understood the exchange, shrugging nonchalantly and ultimately deciding not to worry about it.

Slash was next, and he shyly tossed a light package wrapped in tissue paper into Axl lap, “I got Axl. Merry Christmas, dude.”

A subtle pink spread across Axl’s cheeks before he even opened the package, but it got even worse once he did. Folded inside was a bandana. Everyone knew it was one of Axl’s favorite accessories to wear, so it made sense as a gift, but what really made him pause was the pattern on it. The black fabric was covered with designs of golden snakes wrapped around dark red roses.

Swallowing thickly, Axl cleared his throat, doing his best to smile casually, “This is awesome, man,” he looked up to meet Slash’s eyes, “Thank you.”

Mick took a long drink from his vodka.

“Okay! Tommy, you’re next!” Slash slapped at the drummer’s arm, desperate to get the attention away from himself and the singer.

“Oh, yeah, right!” Tommy nervously lunged forward, to grab his gift. His present was in a paper grocery bag, which he held carefully by the handles as he placed it in Nikki’s lap next to him, “Here you go, buddy!”

Nikki blinked in surprise, his heart skipping a few beats as he looked down at the bag. Opening it up, his eyes widened as he saw what it was. Moving carefully to keep it upright, Nikki pulled out a small potted succulent. The bassist couldn’t help but let out a small, breathy laugh.

Tommy gave him roots. The fucking, sappy bastard.

“Thanks, man!” He slung an arm around the drummer’s shoulders, pulling him close to his side, “I fucking love it!” He shook his head a little, letting his bangs cover his eyes that he knew were getting glassy. “And hey, what are the odds, I got your name,” the entire room rolled their eyes, a few of them chuckling at the reality of what they’d all gotten themselves into. Meanwhile, Nikki grabbed a foil wrapped bundle and handed it to Tommy.

Peeling back the foil eagerly, Tommy gasped, “Cookies!!”

While they weren’t exactly prize-winning, with Izzy’s help Nikki managed to make the pastries both edible and at least somewhat visually appealing. As he happily shoved a cookie into his mouth, Tommy almost choked when he saw, near the bottom of the pile where no one else could see, one large cookie shaped like a heart.

“Thnn yu nnk! Ahveum!” Tommy’s words were practically unintelligible as he tried to speak with his mouth full, but Nikki understood, especially when the taller boy pulled him into a tight hug.

“Anytime, dude,” both of them were beaming, and even as Nikki called for Duff to take his turn, the terror twins kept their arms around each other.

Duff took a large gulp of his vodka before shakily reaching for his gift. It was small and flat, wrapped in magazine pages, and he couldn’t quite meet Izzy’s eyes as he held it out to him, “Here you go, Izzy. Um, merry Christmas.”

Taking the gift, Izzy could feel himself gaping. He hadn’t expected Duff to get him for the game. Tearing the paper, he found himself pulling out a loop of bass strings. As he looked at it though, he realized that the four strings had been carefully braided together. The braid was then carefully twisted around before being wrapped tightly with a thin metal wire to hold it together as an intricate bracelet.

Izzy couldn’t stop staring at it, “Dude,” he breathed out, “this is amazing. Did you make this?”

Duff was twisting his fingers together so hard it had to be painful, “Uh, yeah, I…”

Smiling, Izzy slipped the bracelet on, only taking his eyes off it for a moment to look at the bassist, “It’s amazing. Thank you.”

Returning the smile, Duff allowed himself to relax, if only a little, “Anytime. Uh, Axl, you’re up.”

Steeling himself, the singer kept his face neutral as he tossed a small plastic bag across the coffee table, “Merry Christmas, Slasher,” he smirked, putting all his effort into not showing his nervousness.

Slash didn’t know what to expect, but when he opened the bag and saw what was inside, he immediately burst into a grin and started laughing. Axl smiled in relief, while the rest of the group looked on in confusion. Finally, Slash pulled out a pair of heart shaped sunglasses with soft red lenses.

The group laughed along with him, “Oh my gosh, you got him rose-colored glasses? That’s amazing,” Izzy chuckled, bumping his shoulder against Axl’s.

“Heart eyes, motherfucker!” Tommy laughed.

As his laughter trailed off, Slash looked up at Axl, his smile soft and sincere, “Thank you, Axl. They’re perfect.”

Ducking his head, Axl smiled back shyly before clearing his throat and turning to Izzy, “Alright Stradlin, your turn.”

The smile dropped off of Izzy’s face, replaced by anxiety and uncertainty. But there was no going back now. He had to fucking commit to the plan. He picked up a small box and handed it over to the tall blonde bassist, “Right. Merry Christmas, Duff.”

Duff looked almost as nervous as Izzy did (Axl didn’t know whether he wanted to smack them or hug them). Opening the box, he blinked in surprise. Tilting his head curiously, he pulled out one of Izzy’s wristwatches. “Oh, cool. Thank you!” Across from him, Izzy took a deep breath and finally managed to force out what he’d been practicing in his head all day.

“If there’s no time like the present, then there’s no present like the time.”

Everyone’s eyes snapped to the guitarist, and he felt his face grow warm with the attention. Then, Duff snorted, slapping a hand over his mouth at the sound. But it was no use- within seconds he had dissolved into giggles. The rest of the room soon followed.

“Oh my God. Oh my GOD,” Axl laughed loudly, “You got him a fucking dad joke for Christmas!”

Even Mick was chuckling, and Tommy grinned at Steven, “I think Izzy beat you as far as metaphorical gifts go, dude.”

“I’m okay with that,” Steven giggled.

By the time they all calmed down, Duff had fallen back to lay on the floor, clutching the watch to his chest as his laughter finally tapered off, “Oh, Izzy, I love- I love it. Thank you,” he was smiling so wide his face hurt, and Izzy’s cheeks were still bright red, but he didn’t care. It was worth it.

“Wait…” Slash suddenly narrowed his eyes, “Hold on a sec…” Scanning the room, his jaw dropped, “Who the fuck got Vince??”

“I DID, BITCHES!” the Motley Crue font man stood dramatically, flipping his hair as he made his revelation.

“What the fuck?” Steven gaped, “Did you draw your own name?”

“You bet your ass I did.”

“Why didn’t you say anything??”

“Because I deserve nice things and who better to treat me to them than me?” he grinned pretentiously, “For this exchange I got myself an entirely new makeup kit and a new scarf, which is way better than-” suddenly, Vince pouted, “Hey!” he cried, clearly offended, “At least go into another room!”

The rest of the boys followed his gaze, quickly groaning when they found Nikki practically in Tommy’s lap as the two kissed passionately. Axl made fake gagging noises, while Mick just took a long, long drink from his Christmas Vodka.

“Alright, I think we all need some drinks,” Axl rolled his eyes as he stood, “You two better cool it before I get back or I'm pouring ice water over your heads.” Nikki flipped him off without even breaking away from the drummer.

As the red-head rushed out of the room, Slash stood abruptly, “I’ll go help!” He quickly hurried into the kitchen behind him.

“I’m definitely down to get fucked up, but I need a smoke first,” Izzy sighed. Hesitating, he offered almost shyly, “You want one, Duff?” He held his box of cigarettes out in offering.

With a small smile, Duff stood to follow him outside, “Yeah, sure.”

As they left, Steven looked between the door that closed behind them, the entryway to the kitchen, and the terror twins still making out on the floor in front of them. Quietly, he reached out to hold hands with both Mick and Vince.

The guitarist narrowed his eyes, and started to pull away, “Don’t-”

“Shhhhhh, Mick,” Vince grinned as he shushed him, sitting down directly on Steven’s lap, “It’s Christmas.”

“…Jesus Christ,” Mick let out a long sigh, glancing upwards for just a moment. But when Steven and Vince shifted over to make room for him, he moved to sit next to them on the couch, allowing Steven to continue holding his hand as they passed the bottle of vodka between them. And as much as Mick might try to deny it, none of them could keep a smile off their faces.

~~~~~~~~~

“So, there’s a second part to my gift.”

Axl jumped slightly when Slash’s spoke behind him. Turning to face him, he felt his cheeks burning again just thinking about the gifts they had given each other, “Oh?”

Slash nodded, tugging on a strand of hair shyly.

After a long pause, Axl tilted his head questioningly, “…So-” But right as he tried to speak, Slash finally gathered his courage and surged forward, wrapping his arms around Axl’s waist and kissing him deeply.

For a moment, the singer felt frozen in shock, but once his brain catches up and he convinces himself that this isn’t some hyperrealistic fever dream, he can’t help but melt into Slash’s arms, kissing back passionately. They’ve both waited so long for this moment that they can’t help but stay pressed together until they’re forced to break for air, both gasping deeply into each other’s mouths.

“…That was actually Steven’s Christmas gift to you.”

“WhAT??”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The night air outside was brisk, but for two men who were raised outside of California it was pleasant. Duff and Izzy smoked quietly next to each other, standing in the dim glow of the only working light outside of the Hell House. With each drag of his cigarette, Izzy mentally worked himself up to just say something to Duff. Something, anything to even remotely explain his feelings.

But before he got a chance, Duff started rambling.

“Thank you again. For the gift, I mean. I mean the- not that the watch isn’t nice! I love it, honestly, but that joke man, I definitely didn’t see that coming. And I know sometimes my jokes are dumb, so I appreciate you… indulging me, or whatever,” he waved his hand vaguely, ducking his face in embarrassment, “It just, meant a lot to me. Which might seem weird, or dumb, but-”

Izzy interrupted him with a soft, gentle kiss that still managed to steal the breath from his lungs.

Pulling back, Izzy weaved a hand through Duff’s hair, cupping the back of his head lightly, “I love your jokes. And I love your smile, and your laugh, and your bass playing, and your singing, and… I fucking love you.”

“Oh,” Duff breathed quietly, his eyes wide with awe, “Thank God. Cause… I love you too.”

Laughing, Izzy didn’t have any more words to say. He simply pulled Duff down to kiss him softly again and again.

~~~~~~~~~~

Both bands got spectacularly wasted that night. They pooled their money and ordered five pizzas, and passed around bottles of nightrain and whiskey and vodka, and played music as loud as their speakers could go. Axl and Nikki started writing song lyrics on the walls, and Tommy and Steven drummed on every surface available including their bandmates. At first every kiss was met with groaning and gagging, but by the end of the night every kiss got a round of applause and drunken cheers. Steven even managed to steal a kiss from Mick without being punched in the face. Motley Crue ended up spending the night, half the group stumbling towards whatever mattresses were open, while the other half passed out on the floor of the living room.

Looking around at the group of rockers, Steven beamed happily.

“God bless us, every-”

Vince shoved a pillow into his face.

#my writing #Motley Crue #Guns n Roses #gnr #christmas fic #slaxl #terrorcest #duzzy

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propertyofnikkisthighs · 5 years

Text

Afraid Ch 8

Warnings: Mild smut. A smidgen if you will

The smell of blueberry pancakes permeated my nose and I rolled awake to Nikki, still naked like always, flipping through channels with the tray from room service next to him. God I love him so much, I thought fondly, but then another smell hit my nose. Bacon. And my stomach turned. Bolting out of the bed I ran to the bathroom and emptied the contents of my stomach right into the toilet. The Jack must have affected me worse that I had previously thought, but I felt better after getting it out.

“Uh what was that?” Nikki asked from the doorway to the bathroom.

“The Jack last night made me feel a little sick and I think it just hit me again. I feel fine now I just need to wash my mouth out.” I shrugged going to the sink.

“Are you sure? You don’t feel like you’re running a fever or anything?” He asked pressing a hand to my forehead.

“You’re sweet babe, but I feel perfectly fine now. Just not the drinker I used to be you know.” His concern reminded me of why I was so enamoured with him in the first place.

We sat on the bed eating our breakfast and watching the news despite me being bored by it. Nikki liked keeping up to date now that he ‘wasn’t clouded by the fog of heroin’ so the news in the mornings became a new routine. Nikki luckily ate his bacon first so the urge to vomit subsided quickly. I had just phoned the desk for new towels when there was a knock on our room door.

“That’s weird. Maybe it’s Tommy?” I pondered outloud. There’s no way the towels were being brought to the room already.

Nikki opened the door with a loud groan and soon Doc was walking into the room.

“We’re going back to LA for a few days.” He wasted no time getting to the point of his visit.

“What? Why?” I asked. We still had a lot to do with the album as the boys were still working out kinks with a few songs.

“Well we need the boys to do a few more interviews and I have to have a meeting with the record company” Nikki rolled his eyes and Doc continued. “We leave late tonight so get your shit together” With that he was out of the room.

“I hate interviews” Nikki groaned flopping on the bed on his back.

“I’m sorry you are going to have to do a few interviews.” I chuckled and he rolled over to lay his head into my chest.

“It’s just hardly ever about the music and mostly about the rumors or gossip. Not to mention that I feel like I always end up doing the talking for the band. I don’t want it to seem like I’m the leader when we’re a family, but they just don’t really talk.”

“I miss Alarik so I kind of am excited to get back.” I laughed and Nikki sighed.

“I can’t believe I’m going to have to be okay with having a fucking cat around Whiskey”

“Has he ever even been around a cat?” I forgot Nikki had a dog.

“No, but he has been to a few obedience classes so he’s really good.” Nikki tightened his hold on me. “Every time I have to leave like on tour or rehab he goes to training.”

“Wait.” I realized we were talking as if our animals would meet any time soon. “We’re speaking as if this is a near future. We just made things official.”

“Oh I….yeah you’re right.” Nikki kissed the spot on my sternum. “I just got ahead of myself.”

“I just don’t want to rush anything yet you know? I love how things are right now between us.” I lazily dragged my fingers through his hair.

“I get that” Nikki sat up and connected our lips in a soft kiss.

I never got tired of kissing Nikki. Every touch of our lips together sparked something inside of me that caused my heart to beat at lightning speed. I quickly flipped us so I was straddling him.

“We still have a bit of time to kill before we need to actually start getting things together.” Nikki cooed trailing his hand down my body before his thumb landed on my clit and began making tiny circles.

“I think maybe we can think of a few things to do to kill the time.” I said between moans bucking my hips against his hand.

“I can definitely think of a few things to do before we absolutely need to get ready” Nikki smirked sinking two fingers inside of me.

“Oh fuck” I gasped.

“Not yet, but we’ll get there.” Nikki chuckled.

“Shut up and finger me Nikki”

The jet ride was as I had pictured it would be in all honesty. The boys were all being shit heads and despite me trying to distract myself with a book it wasn’t working.

“All I know is when we get back I’m asking Doc to give me a new room at the other end of the hall from you idiots” Mick huffed.

“What do you mean Mick? I thought you liked rooming next to me?” I asked a little hurt.

“That was before you and Nikki started going at it like rabbits.” Mick rolled his eyes and continued tuning his guitar. “If I wanted to listen to other people have sex all the time I would watch the porn channels”

“Well at least you know I’m actually getting off” I shrugged and returned to my book.

“Wait what do you mean? Those girls are getting off.” Tommy asked suddenly interested at the mention of porn.

“No way. They’re clearly faking.” I laughed. “No girl sounds like that when they actually get off.”

“The sounds they make are too loud to be fake.” Vince scoffed.

“Nikki” I hollered getting the distracted bassists attention.

“Huh?” He looked up from his notebook.

“Have I ever sounded like how girls do in porn?” I asked to prove a point.

“Once. When I gave you that really awesome orgasm.” He smirked. “You remember, we were having a quickie at the studio and I told you that we don’t finish until you finish and then you… wait.” The pieces connected in his mind as I watched.

“I needed to get back to work” I shrugged.

“So you faked it?!” Nikki exclaimed suddenly standing.

“I had to we needed to get back to work.” Next thing I knew Nikki was dragging me into the bathroom. “What are you doing?”

“I got off that day and you didn’t” Nikki said matter of factly.

“Yes I just said that.” Nikki picked me up and set me on the counter of the sink before dropping to his knees.

“I’m going to rectify that.” And rectify he did.

My whole body ached, I had a runny nose, and I was nauseous. It was safe to say I was sick as a dog. Nikki had offered to stay with me and skip his MTV recording with Vince, but I wouldn’t let him do that. I took a bit more cold medicine and made my way back to my VCR to put in Dirty Dancing when there was a knock at my door. Sam and Nikki had a key to get in so if it were either of them I would think they would just walk in, I thought as I looked through the peep hole and caught a glimpse of Tommy.

“Tommy? What are you doing here?” I asked opening the door.

“Heather is out of town for filming something and Nikki is doing the MTV thing and said you were sick so I figured you would be home.” He waltzed right in and to my cabinets as if he owned the place.

“How did you get my address?” I made myself comfortable on the couch again.

“Oh, Tom.” He whirled around in my kitchen. “You don’t have anything in this place.”

“I’ve been in Canada with you guys. I haven’t had a need to buy groceries.”

“Okay you wait here I’ll be back” I wanted to ask what that meant, but he was gone before I could form the words. Oh well, I’ll watch my movie then. About a half an hour later Tommy was walking into my apartment with a few bags hanging off his arms.

“Woah what is all this?” I asked my curiosity peaked.

“Well I know Heather likes some certain stuff when she’s sick so I figured you would probably like the same kind of stuff” He acted as if the gesture was no big deal. I checked the bags over and saw there was soup, chocolate, and The Lost Boys on VHS.

“Oh Tommy you didn’t have to do this for me.” I was on the verge of tears.

“It’s no biggie.” Tommy shrugged grabbing a beer from the six pack he was putting in my fridge and sat on the couch. I was making my way back to the couch with the chocolate in hand when there was another knock on my door. Confused again I looked through the peep hole and saw Sharise.

“Sharise what are you doing here?” I flung the door open startling her.

“Oh Sharise what’s up?” Tommy waved.

“Vince said Nikki told him you were sick and I thought you would like a little company.” Sharise made her way into the apartment and plopped on the couch next to Tommy.

“Did Nikki make it sound like I was dying or something?” I joked joining them.

“Honey I’m home” Nikki called out in a funny voice walking through the door, but stopped in his tracks when he saw Tommy, Sharise, and I giggling on the couch. “I was just thinking it smells like T-Bone has been here”

“Hey babe” I spoke around giggles “T-Bone let me have a few puffs of his joint to help my nausea”

“It worked” Tommy smiled proudly.

“Well if Nikki is back that means Vince will be home soon so I better head out. Feel better hun.” Sharise hugged Nikki and headed out the door warning him to take good care of me.

“Yeah I’ll head home too so Nikki can give you his own dose of medicine.” Tommy winked sticking his tongue out earning himself a small flick on the nose from Nikki.

“I’ll see you tomorrow T-Bone.” Nikki sat down on the couch and motioned for me to climb in his lap.

“I missed you all day” I nuzzled my face into his neck.

“Remember when you couldn’t stand me?” He chuckled pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

“You made a horrible first impression.” my voice muffled into his skin.

“Ya got me there. How about breakfast for dinner? I could make blueberry pancakes?” My stomach growled at the mention of food. “I’ll take that as a yes”

I watched fondly from the couch as Nikki began to prepare our breakfast for dinner. He was much more caring than I would have ever given him credit for in the past. He hummed a melody I didn’t recognize to himself as he worked.

“Almost done babe, I just need to prepare my bacon” He flashed a smile at me getting the bacon in the pan. Then the smell hit me. I ran to the bathroom just barely making it to the toilet. I had never been a big fan of bacon, but the smell never made me sick before now. That’s when it hit me.

“Babe are you okay?” Nikki’s worried voice came from behind me.

“Nikki what day is it?” I asked trying not to panic.

“The seventeenth why?” the confusion evident in his voice.

Slowly I lifted my head from the toilet.

“I’m late.”

“Late for what?”

“No Nikki. I’m late, late.” I tried again.

“I still don’t- oh. OH. Oh fuck.” The pieces finally clicking.

“Yeah. Fuck”

#nikki sixx fanfic #nikki sixx fic #douglas booth!nikki sixx x reader #nikki sixx x reader #motley crue fanfic #nikki sixx #afraid #smidgen of smut

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livingmybestfictionallife · 4 years

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Live Wire --The Dirt--(8)

Summary: Wren Ledden, Tommy’s best friend from high school, has had a rough life, and she intends to keep the nitty gritty details of her suffrage to herself until the day she dies. Only Tommy has gotten her to open up about a small portion of her troubles, and it’s only Tommy who she trusts with her life. That is until her life gets turned around sneaking into a concert one night...the same night Motley Crue is born.

AN: this chapter I think is shorter than the others by far, so don’t be mad, but another is coming this week!

@prettyyoungandbored, @hot-young-runningfree, @crue-sixx, @oskea93, @dancergirl5527, @thatonemoviefan, @casualcomputerarbiter-blog

To the person who asked to be included on the tag list, for some reason your username is not showing up :( message me and I’ll get that fixed!

Previous Chapters:

One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven

For months, Wren was able to keep her job at the public library a secret from the band. They were loud and boisterous people—except Mick—and were sure to embarrass the living hell out of her, or even get her fired if they dared set foot into her work, so it remained a secret until her drunken ass spilled the beans.

“You’ll need a shit ton of fliers if you’re going to even try and draw a crowd,” Wren slurred after a long night of drinking with Tommy and Nikki. Nikki had managed to secure the band a spot performing three nights during next week at the Whiskey-A-Go-Go, and was currently panicked about not bringing in revenue. It took nearly a month of schmoozing his boss to even consider letting their band play, and even then it was allowed on the stipulation of bringing money into the night club.

“Maybe a radio ad!” Tommy gasped, his eyes wide with thrill until Nikki threw a half-eaten piece of bread at Tommy’s face.

“Do we look like we can afford a radio ad?” Nikki laughed.

“Do we look like we can afford fliers?” Tommy asked seriously in response.

“I can print them for free at work!” Wren had exclaimed in an excited tone as she jumped up at her own idea, subsequently tossing whiskey from her glass and onto her skin. And that was the end of her secret of employment. She was, however, able to print a few hundred fliers, and then she and the guys took to the strip at all hours of the day and night to post the news of Mötley Crüe’s debut.

The night before their first performance, the band met to solidify their set list and perfect the tiny details that irked either Nikki or Wren’s ears. Their practice ran short when Lovey sprang through the door and demanded to be included in the band’s “process.”

“What the fuck does that even mean?” Nikki asked as the blonde repositioned the frilly, light blue tank top that hardly covered her braless tits.

“Like her!” she then pointed to Wren. “Come on, which one of you is she fucking to be this close to the action?”

“Watch yourself, lady,” Mick gently warned as Tommy rose from his seat, Nikki tightened his fists, and Wren placed her hands on her hips in defiance.

“Babe,” Vince said in a soft, coaxing voice as he reached tentatively for his girlfriend’s arm.

“No, which one is it? Is she giving it to the old fuck?” Mick held his hands up above his heads, cleansing himself of any involvement in the altercation to come. “Who is it, Wren?” Lovey pressed the girl standing in stark contrast to her. Her done up make up and fanciful clothes looked like something out of a movie compared to the sweaty, tied up hair and bland, tattered, baggy t-shirt that swallowed Wren’s body. Why the hell is she threatened by me? Wren thought as the gap closed between she and Vince’s girlfriend. “Could it be the scrawny drummer? Or maybe it’s the bass playing motherfucker who doesn’t know shit about music.”

“Yeah, and some dumb bitch fawning over a cover band called ‘Rock Candy’ is so much more knowledgeable,” Wren retorted with venom on her tongue and a sting in her bite.

“Wren,” Tommy’s voice acted as a warning, not for her to back off, but for her to quickly make up her mind if Lovey was worth what was to come. When she turned to face the band in an attempt to gauge their opinions on the events unfolding before them, Wren’s eyes met Nikki’s cold stare. His lips were pressed thin and anger overwhelmed his face. Tommy was equally unenthused with the situation, and Mick bestowed a look of concern.

“Listen to them, Wren,” Lovey teased with her pouty lips poked out, “or they may not let you play with their dicks tonight.” The blonde’s big eyes were opened even wider as she anticipated Wren’s response; however, it was Nikki’s voice that cut through the tense silence.

“Vince, get a hold of your mutt,” Nikki shouted more at Lovey than to Vince. A defensive look flashed from his eyes as his gaze met Wren, only to see the frustration that coated her appearance.

“Stay out of it, Nikki! I don’t need your help!” Wren snapped with ice in her veins at the same moment Vince’s girlfriend retaliated.

“Fuck you, Sixx!” she yelled. “You can call me whatever the fuck you want; it doesn’t change the fact that you’re just too blind to see she’s just a stray you three let in for an easy fuck!” Her comment sat uneasily on all of the men’s shoulders, however they were hesitant to speak as they internalized the bitter, cold, and dissevered tone that had hissed at Nikki moments ago.

“The difference between you and I is that I don’t have to flash my money or my tits to get attention from a single one of these guys, and I still have more respect from all of them than you’ll see from any man in your pitiful, entitled fucking life.” Tommy couldn’t help the snorted chuckle that escaped his lungs as Wren finished her statement. Mick had a wide smile spread with his eyes narrowed and he nodded in agreement with Wren’s words. Vince, who had been hesitant to take sides in this argument faded to the background without a word in favor of either woman, and Nikki remained a statue by his bass amp as he continued to mull over the sting of Wren’s personal attack.

Lovey took a step forward and positioned herself so that she stood with less than an inch separating Wren’s chest from her own. Everyone in the room noticed Lovey ease up onto her toes so that her lips could be level with Wren’s ear due to their distinctive height difference. Lovey’s voice was a chilling breeze as she spoke so softly not a single person could make out a word that traveled from her lips except for Wren. As Wren stood flatfooted, back straight, posture erect, she stared forward and refused to bring a single bit of the emotions swirling within her to her face. “There’s nothing wrong with making up for lost time,” she began, “but will any of them really replace the taste of Clay?” Wren swallowed hard as she tried to suppress the lump that manifested so quickly in her throat. Her body became immobile as her veins turned into frozen rivers and her skin burned as hot as the surface of the sun. From across the room, Tommy immediately noticed all color wash from Wren’s face. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest so rapidly she thought her heartbeat alone could set the pace for the band’s next song. Wren could hear her name being called out, and she could see Tommy, Mick, and Nikki’s lips moving, but the voices were so distant, so severed from the bodies they came from, she ignored them altogether.

“How the fuck do you know about that?” she asked lowly only for the blonde to huff, flip her hair over her shoulder, and turn away. “How the fuck do you know that?!” Wren’s voice echoed even louder as she lunged after the much shorter woman and spun her around with a single, firm grip of her shoulder.

“It doesn’t matter how I know,” Lovey flippantly said with an aura of innocence surrounding her, “it just matters that I do.” In a blinding rage, Wren threw Lovey to the ground, only to be surprised that the other woman had grabbed a fistful of Wren’s hair and pulled her down as well. Lovey tried to pull Wren’s hair, but found herself curling up into a fetal position as Wren directed kick after kick and punch after punch to the girl’s ribs. Seeing this as an opportunity, Wren crawled on top of Lovey, used her knees to pin the girl’s limbs to her sides, and then landed two punches to the face before she felt Tommy’s arms slip around her.

“Get the fuck off me, Tommy!” Wren shouted before she slipped away from his grasp, shoved him away from her, and made another lunge at Lovey, who had taken her moment of freedom to stand and make a bolt for the door.

“Nik!” Tommy yelled out as Wren crossed his path. He and Mick had both set aside their instruments at the beginning of the girls’ argument, in case something like this were to happen. To Lovey’s fortune, Nikki was able to intercept Wren by snaking an arm around her hips, spinning her around, and flipping her over his shoulder.

“Put me down, Nikki!” she shouted. “Damn it, Sixx! Put me the fuck down!”

Ignoring Wren’s protests, Nikki called out first to Vince, then to the others, “Take her home, we’ll finish practicing tomorrow.” As he walked toward the back most room of the apartment—his room—he tried to ignore Wren’s angry fists pounding into his back, he tried to hold her still as best he could without getting himself kicked in the face, and he hoped she would calm down enough to talk to him instead of scream like she had done since the second Tommy tried to pull her away from Lovey.

Once inside his room, Nikki slammed the door shut and flipped Wren onto his bed so that her back landed against the mattress, forcing her body to bounce up like a ragdoll. He flicked the light on and stared at her with passionate anger manifesting in a steaming ball in his stomach. “What the fuck was that about?” he asked sharply as he stood over her. Wren still laid with her back against the mattress and her elbows propped up to support her, her eyes casting up in an angry scowl at Nikki.

“None of your business,” she retorted.

“Bullshit! I was just trying to help you out there!” Nikki stated as he took another step closer to where she lay.

“I don’t need anyone to fight my battles for me,” she hissed, “let alone you!”

“What the fuck does that mean?” Nikki’s eyes continued to peer down at Wren as she laid all too comfortably on his bed with a defensive arrogance that both pissed him off and intrigued him.

“You don’t fucking know me, Sixx,” she hissed. “You don’t get the right to try and defend me when you have no idea what the fuck is going on.”

“You don’t let anyone get to know you!” Nikki snapped. He’d been hanging around Wren for long enough to know that she knew more of anyone else’s secrets than anyone knew of hers, and tonight just proved it. “You’re best fucking friend is out there and he doesn’t even know what the fuck is going on!”

“It’s no one else’s damn business!” Wren’s voice was sharp as she pulled herself to her knees and stared at Nikki with her eyebrows narrowed and her jaw taught.

“It is when you make it our business,” he retorted with his eyes narrowed in on her. Wren stood from her position on the bed and placed herself directly in front of Nikki.

“I didn’t make it everyone’s business! That bitch started all of this shit—” Before Wren could reach the end of her defense, Nikki’s voice interrupted her and turned her own words into a noose around her throat.

“Who is Clay?” Silence followed his question as both of their chests heaved in anger and the two stared into each other’s eyes. Each set of orbs, either hazel or grey reflected the same angsty, impatient, and frustrated glare as if the two souls were connected in their own misery. Nikki quickly noticed the subtle changes in Wren’s posture. Her shoulders tightened, her jaw clenched, her entire body turned into a stiff, unflexing wax replica of Wren, and all sense of emotion—hope, anger, hatred, fear—abandoned her otherwise pleasant face. After an overly long moment of anxiously staring down at the woman, Nikki folded his arms over his chest and widened his stance. Wren tugged at her lower lip with her teeth and Nikki saw for the first time, a—100% without a shadow of a doubt—true sign of vulnerability in Wren Ledden. However, in that single action—her holding her lip between her teeth in anxious terror—she stepped forward, jammed her index finger into Nikki’s chest, and with a quivering voice that was caught in her throat spoke.

“Don’t you ever say that fucking name around me ever again.” Without needing to be prompted, Nikki nodded, gently pulled Wren’s arms past his sides until she wrapped them around his torso, and softly placed his hands against her. One rested in the middle of her back and the other lay gingerly against the back of her head. He tried his best to ignore the warm pools of tears that gathered against his shirt and soaked into his skin, and he tried not to imagine the infinite sadness that her face could impose—her lips pulled tight in strain with the indention of her teeth lining her lower lip, he cheeks beet red and streaked with agonizing tears, her eyes puffy and hopeless—but he failed in this endeavor.

Nikki noticed the door to his room creep open ever so slightly to reveal Tommy’s curious expression begging to know if his friend was okay. He didn’t expect to see Wren wrapped up in Nikki’s arms. He didn’t expect to hear her soft sobs—a sound not even his ears had experienced before—but more than anything else, he didn’t expect to see a lonely, solitaire tear slide down Nikki’s face.

Continue Reading: Next Chapter

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awkward-gay-bro · 4 years

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A New League

Before the accident Seth Rollins was on top of the world and now he was stuck in this stupid hospital bed. People can say wrestling is fake all they want but these injuries are definitely real. Seth miscalculated a jump during a table ladder chair match and things weren’t looking good. He broke a few bones, pulled a few muscles, a little internal bleeding. Nothing he hadn’t done before. But some news station took it a little too seriously. Then twitter mobbed about it. And now the WWE is taking it way too seriously trying to cover their asses.

Seth leans up in his hospital bed as Vince McMahon walks into the room. “How bad is it Seth?”

“The doctor said I’m never going to be able to wrestle again. He’s full of shit, though. I’ll be back in the ring in no time.”

“We can’t do that Seth, not with you in this condition. Your injuries were pretty well documented, and we aren’t going to take the bad publicity if you get hurt further,” Vince said rather coldly.

“Ten years. I’ve been wrestling for ten years and you are just gonna cut me loose? There are people a decade older than me that are way more worn out still going at it. I’m not ready to be done.” Seth wasn’t about to give up. This was his life and he wasn’t going to give it up without a fight.

“I’m sorry, Seth. Their injuries didn’t make the five o clock news the way yours did,” McMahon said, turning around to leave the room.

The reality of the situation was really starting to sink into Seth. He stared down at his multiple casts, his hair falling down into his eyes, and with a hint of begging in his voice, he said, “Mr. McMahon, I’ll do anything.”

Stopping in the doorway, turning just his head, McMahon said, “Well, there is one thing we could try. You may not want to go through with it.”

“What is it?”

“Well, we’ve been funding a medical research center who has been doing some interesting things when it comes to physical therapy. We wanted to find a way to speed up the healing process or even better prevent the need for one.”

“Did you find one?” Seth said as the light returned to his face.

“Well they have created a process, and they’ve had some success in their initial trials. Of course, the last few of your peers they tried it on had some pretty severe side effects.” But none of that mattered. All that mattered was that Seth Rollins was going to get out of this hospital bed and back in that ring.

“I don’t care what the side effects are. I’m in. As soon as I can.”

“Alright, well let’s get it scheduled on the book. How does tomorrow sound?”

It was the morning after the procedure and Seth was laying in a bed in the research center. Another day, another hospital bed. Seth wiped the sleep out of his eyes, stretched his arms out wide, and yawned a massive yawn. That’s when it him. The aches and pains from his recent injury were completely gone. Hell, the longer persisting ache from his old knee injury, from his previously torn ACL, everything, they were all gone. He hadn’t felt this good since he was 18 years old.

“Good morning, sleepy head.” Vince McMahon was standing at the foot of his bed while a young guy who must have been with the research company started jotting things down on a chart. As the man left the room Seth couldn’t help but notice how nicely the scrubs hugged the guy’s perky little...

Woah, that’s not a thought Seth had ever had before. Nothing wrong with it. He’d caught that closet case Ambrose checking him out in the locker room and it never bothered him. But he definitely wasn’t the one having doing the checking.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m feeling great Mr. McMahon. Does my voice sound weird to you? Never mind, doesn’t matter. I feel so great I think I could get back in the ring tomorrow!” Seth said, speaking a mile a minute.

“Slow your roll there Rollins. You’re going to notice a few changes, so I thought it would be best if I was here to talk you through them all. Some might have already become apparent to you...others might take a little time.”

“Hey the only change I care about is how strong I feel right now.”

“Well Seth, strong might not be a word I would use to describe you anymore,” Vince said with a snide chuckle.

“What is that supposed to mean? I feel better now than I’ve ever felt in my life!” Seth excitedly shouted.

“Maybe it would best if I showed you,” McMahon said. As the 74 year man walked closer towards him Seth started to notice how much bigger and bulkier he was looking than usual. Vince kept in great shape for his age but damn he was looking huge.

“How long was out for? The gains you’ve got...that had to have taken months,” Seth said as Vince reached down and grabbed his hand. Vince’s hand was massive, too, it was almost twice the size of Seth’s. How was that even possible?

“The initial procedure only took about an hour. Everything else happened while you slept last night.” That couldn’t be right though. Vince was huge. And as Seth stood up he saw just how huge he was. Seth and Vince were the same height of 6 ft 1 but Seth wasn’t looking into McMahon’s eyes anymore. In fact, Seth’s eye line was now level with McMahon’s nipples.

“Holy shit McMahon, did you have them do something to you? You’re massive. Can they do it to me, too?” Seth said excitedly. What ever made McMahon so huge he wanted in. Shit, was he already going to grow huge? McMahon said some changes may not be apparent yet.

“I’ve never gone through the procedure, Seth,” guiding Seth to the other part of the room. As he did the cute male nurse from earlier came back into the room, fiddling with something in the closet. From a laying position Seth hadn’t noticed how tall he was either. No wonder those scrubs were so tight around his ass, it must be hard to find ones that fit right.

“Excuse me sir, how tall are you?” Seth asked, ignoring the part of his brain that was ogling the equally tight front of the guy’s scrubs.

“Oh, I’m just over five nine,” he said as he pulled a full length mirror out of the closet.

“That’s impossible, I’m six...” Seth started to say as his new reality started to piece together. Standing there, mouth aghast, Seth finally realized what those side effects were. Seth was a runt. It looked like he had deflated in on himself. He was tiny. His head didn’t reach the top of the mirror. He had to be around five foot four. Being short would be one thing. He could live with short. But he was a twig. His once broad shoulders were now slimmer than this hips. His veiny, hairy, muscular arms were now half the size of what he was used to. When he squinted his eyes he could see there was still a peach fuzz of hair coating them, albeit light, blonde, and sparse. He was just glad that his shapeless hospital gown was sparing him the embarrassment of knowing what the rest of his body looked like.

Not that his face was any better. His signature scruffy beard was completely gone. His face was smooth for the first time since puberty. His once rugged jaw and manly features had softened into an almost angelic visage. His already long hair looked fuller and fluffier on this shrunken body. His lips were full and rosy and his eyes were the only thing on his body that looked bigger. Well, that was until he turned around to see why the cold air was coming through his hospital gown.

Seth had always had a nice muscular ass. He’d seen enough pictures of it pop up online. But while the rest of his body shrunk it looked like he lost no muscle mass from his disproportionate globes and gained a small layer of fat. The globes defied gravity the way the stood up like a shelf on his lithe new frame.

“We don’t want you exhausting too much energy just yet, let’s get you back to bed,” said the male nurse as put his arm around Seth’s hip and guided him back to bed. As the nurse moved Seth across the room his hand brushed against Seth’s cheek which caused both to jiggle far longer than Seth thought they should. Oddly the feeling of another man’s hand on his ass made his wood spring to attention. Seth immediately blushed red as he knew a hospital gown wasn’t going to hide anything and then blushed even harder when he realized it did.

“How...how could you do this to me?” Seth asked, whimpering.

“I told you there were side effects. You said you would do anything,” Vince said, looking down at the much smaller man.

“I said I would do anything to wrestle again. How am I supposed to wrestle like this? I’m ruined,” Seth said, tears in his eyes.

“Well you can’t wrestle in the WWE that’s for sure. Hell, Trish could take you down with one hand behind her back. But you can still wrestle,” Vince said, stifling back laughter as he did.

“Where are on Earth could I wrestle like this?”

“Well like I said, you weren’t the first person to go through the procedure. And with results like these you won’t be the last. Hell, we’ve already made deals with other sports organizations for their injured athletes. The NFL. The NHL. FIFA. Hell even the ATP. And all those athletes are going to want to work somewhere. Soon enough we will have a whole new league for you to wrestle in. Of course, you’ll need a more fitting stage name and costume. Here, I brought someone along to illustrate the look I am going for,” with that Vince stepped out of the room and quickly came back in his arm around a tiny little twink of a man with long curling red hair. The boy had porcelain white skin that was coated with the lightest dusting of freckles from his face down towards under his shirt. His lips were a rosy red made all the brighter contrasted against his snowy skin. His eyes were sparkling an emerald green while his red eye lashes softly fluttered as his wavy curls fell in front of his face.

“This is one of our first wrestlers in our new league, you may know him as...”

“Sheamus??? Is that Sheamus?” Seth interrupted. The boy looked nothing like he 6ft4in brick of muscle but no one had seen the behemoth since he’d had an injury not unlike Seth’s own.

“We call him Lucky now. Lucky, why don’t you step into the bathroom and switch into your wrestling uniform?” With one hand Vince picked up Sheamus’ bag and wrapped his other around the slim of his waste. Sheamus could have easily carried it himself or found the bathroom in the small room but Vince loved showing these former monsters of muscle just how small and weak they’d become.

After a few minutes the new “Lucky” walked out of the bathroom. It was obviously a leprachaun play on the wrestler’s Irish heritage that fit a lot better now that he’d lost over a foot in height. Lucky’s costume had a small little leprachaun hat with an emerald green bowtie. The sparkly green booty shorts rode up showing off the amazing pair of globes on Sheamus’ new body. Sheamus turned around and touched his toes, showing off the glittery gold “LUCKY” that was written across his rear. Seth was used to wrestler’s not wearing much, a pair of black trunks was Sheamus’ old outfit, but this little Leprachaun costume was so much more demeaning...more sexual. Seth had to admit, Sheamus did look pretty sexy standing there, though. Part of him wanted to tear those shorts off and help Sheamus get lucky. But he was realizing a bigger part wanted the old Sheamus to do the same to him.

“We’ve already got athletes lined up to join the program, some pretty big A-Listers who don’t know the exact side effects that come along with our procedure. But until they are ready we think that you and Lucky will be our head line act. And don’t worry, we’ll still have theme matches like in the WWE. Maybe not table ladder chair matches, but I’m sure tag team will still be popular. Maybe something with oil.” Vince said, his mouth watering while looking at Sheamus who still had not broken his toe touching pose. “Sorry, I trailed off. We will need a new outfit for you. A new stage name if you’d like. I am actually prone to you staying Seth Rollins. And I always loved your leather get up, we could definitely still work with that in this new ring. Maybe a leather fishnet combo.”

Shit. Everything was spiraling so quickly. Seth just needed to breathe. He needed to be away from everyone. “When can I go home?”

“We find it best if people aren’t alone right after the procedure,” the male nurse said, “There are a lot of things that are going to be different for you now and it’s best to have someone there with you”

“I don’t want anyone to see me like this. Not right now. I can’t deal with”

McMahon interupted him, “You’re alright. We have already set up accomdations for you. Go get dressed your new roommate is waiting out in the lobby for you.”

*******************************************************************************************

The clothe’s Mr. McMahon provided were embarassing as helll but none of Seth’s clothes fit anymore and he didn’t want to keep walking around with his giant new ass jiggling in the wind so it was that or nothing. So there Seth was in a light pink crop top that showed off just how slim his arms and stomach were now. The leather leggings he was wearing reminded him of his normal wrestling attire, albeit they used to bulge more in the front and a heall of a lot less in the back. The only solice he had was that the lacey pink panties were skimpy enough that the leather pants hid them perfectly.

“Damn that ass looks good,” Seth heard a man say, his voice low and sultry. As he turned around to hear the voice a hand spanks his ass hard, “That jiggle, too! I am so glad I volunteered for this.”

There stood Dean Ambrose. Now a foot taller than Seth and a hundred pounds heavier. Everyone looked big to Seth now, but this was the first time he felt truly intimidated by another man. “Let’s you and me get home Sethy, there’s some things I want to show. I’m pretty minimilistic so I do only have the one bed, but I don’t think you’ll mind sharing, will ya bud?”

“No,” Seth said, drooling as he looked up at he muscular man in front of him.

“Arlight, nice. Once we settle in, you can meet some of your new competition."

#Seth Rollins #muscle theft #twinkification #Sheamus #the procedure #butt growth #fan fiction #my work

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madamsixx · 4 years

Text

Beyond The Leather Chapter 7: Secret Revealed

Warnings: Mentions of drug use

February 2nd, 1985, LA

Theresa came down to come and get me from Toronto Canada and fly with me back to LA. I had a audition for an upcoming movie in December and a interview with Joan Rivers in February. I was staying at Theresa's apartment because Tamara was out in paris for fashion week. There were two major things I wanted to do while I was here; 1 visit Ola, Slash, and Albion and 2 nail this audition.

"So how was your Christmas and New Years?" Theresa asked as we walked into her tiny apartment.

"It was good no complaints. Hope yours was good as well?"

"It was, I went to go see my parents. They were excited to see me." She smiled. "So Motley Crue huh." She broke the tension.

"Yeah Tammy told me, wow." I say sitting on the couch. "Hey did you book the car service and glam team for my interview with Joan Rivers?" I asked.

"Um no not yet I'll do it closer to the day."

"Ok. Well I'm a bit hungry, you got anything to eat?"

"Uh no but we can go out and get something if you'd like?" Theresa says searching in the fridge.

"Sure that sounds great." I respond.

Later in the afternoon...

Theresa was on the phone talking to one of her friends, it sounded like she was making plans with them.

"So Iman one of my friends is having her birthday today at this club called the Whiskey A GO GO and wants me to come out, do you think your alright to stay on your own, or would you like to come out?" She asked

"Oh no I'll stay in doors, you go out and enjoy your self I'll be alright."

Later at Night....

I heard the door open and shut as I was sleeping. I also heard loud voices and things knocking around. I got up to check out what that noise was.

"Theresa are you ok?" I asked coming out of the room.

My eyes went wide when I saw Theresa. But it wasn't so much her it was who she was with. Robbin Crosby, Nikki Sixx and two other guys who I have never seen before. They're completely wasted.

"Iman help me please there all whacked out of there minds, they were trying to drive home so I just brought them here instead." She says as shes holding Nikki up, and the other two guys are holding Robbin up.

"Um.....sure ok" I say running to help her pick up Nikki.

We throw Nkkki on the couch and he's passed out completley. Theresa then guides the other two towards her room so Robbin can sleep on her bed.

"Thanks so much guys you can crash on the other couch. It's a pull out so you two will be comfortable on it."

"Thanks Theresa we appreciate it." One of the guys spoke up with an English accent.

They took the pillows off of the couch and pulled it out and got into the bed. Theresa went and brought some blankets for them.

"Thank you love." The other guy smiled at her.

"Here come with me." She pulled my arm and I followed her into my room.

"Theresa what the-"

"I know I know." She interrupted me. "Look I went out with my friend to the Whiskey A GO GO and Nikki, Robbin, and these two guys from Hanoi Rocks Mike Monroe and Andy McCoy were there drinking. And I saw them trying to drive so I took Nikki's car keys and drove them all here.

"That was good of you. Who are Hanoi Rocks by the way?" I asked with curiosity.

"There a rock band. The guy Razzle was there drummer, remember the one that was killed in the car crash with Vince."

"Oh yeah I remember."

"Anyways get some sleep, we'll talk tomorrow." She walks half way out my door then turns around alittle "Y' know Nikki has been asking about you since I got to the whiskey." she smiled.

"Goodnight Theresa." I say shoving her out of my room and shutting the door.

So Nikki was still thinking about me. I thought he would have hated me. But either way I needed to stay far away from him and his band.

I woke up the next morning to see a note on the side of my bed that read Went to go get breakfast- Terri. I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom to brush and shower. When I got to the bathroom I saw the guy from yesterday combing his hair and applying makeup on his face.

"Oh sorry I'll just wait till your done." I said as I backed away.

"Iman right?" He spoke looking at me through the mirror.

"Hi... um yes, and your?"

"Michael... Michael Monroe from Hanoi Rocks."

"Its nice to meet you. I'm a...I'm sorry about your drummer Razzle." I whispered.

"Thank you." He responded as he wiped the make up off his face. And started reapplying it.

I watched him do that a couple of times and realized that that could be a coping mechanism for him.

I turned and headed towards the living room. Nikki was sitting on the couch with another guy watching the news. He didn't look like him self, in fact he looked terrible.

"Why's Vince on the news?" Nikki asked with a slurred voice.

"That's for the manslaughter charge Nikki." I looked at him.

"Oh yeah." He leans his bed back on the sofa.

"Hi I'm Andy I'm from the rock group Hanoi Rocks, and you must be Iman." He got up to come and shake my hand.

"Hi yes I am. I'm sorry about your drummer Razzle," I shook his hand.

"You are a beauty, I can see why Nikki likes you." He looked down at Nikki and smiled. He walked back over and sat on the couch.

Nikki just glared at him. His eyes were droopy and red and he smelt really bad.

"So have you talked to Vince?" I asked sitting next to Nikki.

"No."

"Why not?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Because he ruined my band." He scoffed.

"Oh well don't you think-"

"Dont you think you should shut up and mind your own fucking buissness!" He snapped.

"You know what Nikki I'll do just that." I got up to walk back to the washroom, but turned back to give him a piece of my mind. " Vince is your bandmate, your best friend, and your brother. You guys just finshed a successful tour that not many rock bands have been blessed to have. I'm sure you have experienced some of the best times together and shared stories and even shared girls with each other. And your telling me that you cant even pick up the phone to call him, or visit him. He needs your support." I turned on my heel and walked away.

The door opened and Theresa came in with Robbin carrying breakfast for everyone. She set it down on the table and the boys started to dig in. I showered and stayed in the room rehearsing my lines for my audition and worrying about my first interview on TV ever with Joan Rivers.

Knock Knock

"Yes come in."

Nikki opened the door and let him self into my room. He sat down on the bed and just stared at me. He honestly didn't look like himself. And I dont think it was stress.

"How was your Christmas?" He asked

How was my Christmas??? How dare him even ask me that after the way he yelled at me.

"I'll answer that after you give me an apology for the way you spoke to me out there." I replied.

"I don't owe you shit." He snapped

"Really...after your outburst just now. You know..... I think you are that guy I met in New York Nikki."

Nikki was seething with anger, his fists rolled up into a ball and he clenched his jaw.

"Fuck you you stupid cunt." He shouted

"Get out." I grabbed my lamp on the dresser "Now!" I screamed and threw it at the door barely missing him.

"What the fuck is wrong with you psycho bitch." He yelled.

"Get out Nikki."

He flipped me off and then opened the door and slammed it shut. Ahole.

____

I finished my audition it went really well. So all I had to do was wait a couple days to hear a call back. Now as for my interview I was really nervous about it. Me and Theresa were sitting in her car outside her apartment. We just sat there talking while she had a smoke when all of a sudden we here another car pull up behind us. I looked through the rear view mirror and realized it was Nikki's car. Robbin was in there too.

"Is there a reason that there here?" I asked Theresa.

"Well Nikki has been asking about you through Robbin."

"What do you mean through Robbin?" I looked at Theresa.

"Well me and Robbin are kind of together. Were taking things slow." She smiled.

"Theresa after what they did at the Rainbow you still want that guy?"

"Look Iman he's sweet ok. He told me he was sorry. I forgave him. Besides he wants us to go out for lunch today."

"I'll pass."

"No your coming." She opens her car door and puts out her cigarette.

I see there car door open on the passengers side and Robbin walks towards Theresa giving her a hug and a kiss. I open my car door and walk towards the apartment to slip away quickly.

"Nooooo I dont think so your coming." Theresa chuckled and I huffed.

Nikki was driving his car, I sat in the passengers seat while Theresa and Robbin sat in the back giggling and whispering to each other. Nikki kept taking his eyes off the road to look at me. While I chose to look out the window.

"Is there somthing you want to listen to princess?" Nikki asked looking over at me.

No response

"I hear you have your first TV interview coming up, that must be exciting." He smiled. "And its Joan Rivers too."

No response

Nikki looked agitated, I know he was trying to talk to me but he really did hurt my feelings with blowing up on me earlier on in the day. Usually I'm a diva with a temper. But today I was being a sassy diva

We pulled up to a Diner. I was getting ready to get out of the car when Nikki grabbed my arm.

"Can we talk....please?" He pleaded and I rolled my eyes.

"Were going to go in, Iman just hear him out ok." Theresa rubbed my back and got out with Robbin.

"look I'm sorry for how I treated you earlier, I'm just upset over the whole Vince thing. I dont know how to handle it."

"Well drinking and having an attitude aren't going to help you handle it any better. And it's not just your outburst earlier today it was last year as well when you pushed me." I crossed my arms over my chest.

"What the fuck, Mani if I remember correctly you punched me." Nikki turned his full body towards me.

"Well you deserved it, you insulted my family."

"Because you insulted me!" He shouted.

"Were going no where with this Nikki I'm leaving." I opened the car door and he leaned over me quickly and shut it back.

"What the hell Nikki!"

"I would never hurt you on purpose Mani never. And I'm so sorry for last year and what I did today. I just want us to go back to how we were when we were at the record store and when we were meeting at the cafe. I miss you. And I know you miss me too."

He stared at me in my eyes and I needed to turn away from him immediately. I was trying to stay away from him but it just wasn't working. He was driving me insane.

"I'm sorry I made those comments to you and punched your jaw." I giggled and he giggled.

"I might need you to kiss it better for me." Nikki bit his lips and leaned closer to me.

"Nikki I'll punch your other jaw." I laughed while pushing him away and opening the car door.

After we ate at the Diner we went back to the boys home. Nikki helped me with my nerves for my interview that was coming up. He had been interviewed several times so he already knew what it was like. After that we all just sat around watching TV. Nikki and Robbin kept excusing themselves to go to the bathroom. Nikki now was in the bathroom and I had to go. I walked into the bedroom and headed to the bathroom.

"Um Nik I have to pee." I knocked on the door

"Oh uh one sec."

I heard fiddling and things dropping on the ground. He finally opened the door. And he looked different. His eyes were red and droopy and he was holding on to the door for a bit of support.

"Nikki you ok, you dont look so good?" I moved forward and tried to touch him.

"I'm alright just a stomatch ache." He moved back.

"Nik theres blood coming down your arm." I reached to grab his arm but he pulled away.

"I'm fine Iman fuck." He spat. "You said you needed to pee so you can go." He grabbed a little silver box off the counter and moved me to the side and walked out.

I wasnt sure what was going on, but what ever it is Robbin was behaving like Nikki. And I started wondering to myself if Theresa was doing what ever it is that they were doing. ______

February 16, 1985

It was the day of my interview. I quickly got up and got dressed. Tamara told Theresa to book me a glam team and a car service for today. The glam team should be waiting for me when I get there. And the car service was coming to pick me up for 7:00 because my interview was at 10. I ran to Theresa's room to wake her up so she could get ready. But she wasn't in there. She had been partying non stop with Nikki, Robbin, and the members of Hanoi Rocks for the past couple of months.

"Oh my God where is she!" I was freaking out.

Maybe she got up early to grab breakfast for us, or maybe she's downstairs in the lobby. I ran downstairs to check the lobby and she wasn't there. I came back up and decided to call Nikki and Robbin.

Ring Ring Ring

"Mmmm hello."

"Hello, Nikki its Iman please is Theresa there?" I asked a little panicked.

"Yeah but she's recovering from a hang over."

"A hang over! I have my interview today she knows that!" I shouted.

"Hey don't shout in my fucking ear ok, I had a long night." Nikki spat.

"Just put her on the phone please Nikki."

There was a bit of fumbling and then she answered the phone.

"Hello." She slurred

"Hi hello my interview is today you need to hurry back!"

"Mmm can you just do it by yourself I had a long fucking night and my head is pounding. You'll be fine. I need to get some sleep." I heard a thump on the other end but the phone wasn't hung up.

"Hello, hello, Theresa." I called out.

"Iman." It was Nikki's voice.

I started sniffling." Nikki I can't do this alone." I started crying. "She knew how much this interview meant to me. How could she do this?"

"Princess you'll be fine ok just remember what I told you, have fun with it ok." Nikki spoke calmly.

"Ok." He hung up.

8:23 am

"Where the hell is the car service?" I started pacing the room. I grabbed the phone and dialed Nikki's number again.

"Hello?" "Nikki is Theresa still there?" I asked frustrated.

"Uuuuh yeah but I dont think she can come to the phone." Nikki responded hesitantly.

"Oh God Nikki ask her if she booked the car service for me to get to the interview. It was suppose to be here at 7:00 my interview is at 10am." I burst into tears.

"Hey Theresa, hey wake the fuck up. Did you book Imans car service?" Nikki yelled.

"No she didn't she said she forgot. Dont worry princess."

"I have to worry I'll never make it Nikki." I cried.

"Yes you will." Nikki hung up the phone.

8:50

I heard a knock on the door. I ran to the door and opened it and saw Nikki standing there.

"Hey princess." He smiled and I jumped into his arms. My hero.

We got into his... oh he bought a new car. Actually it was a jeep. We got into his jeep and he sped down the roads.

We arrived just in time. But Theresa forgot to book a glam team for me. So I had to go on in the black dress I was wearing and sandals. Tamara was not going to be happy about my look. My hair was in a bun but I let it down it was a but wavy. And I didn't have any make up on.

"I look terrible." I frowned and Nikki furrowed his eye brows.

"I've never seen a more beautiful woman in my whole entire life." He put his hand under my chin for me to look up at him.

We stared at each other. Even though it was just seconds it felt like years. We both leaned in ready to do somthing we have never done before.

"Hey Iman 2 Minutes till go time."

Our eyes gaze was interrupted by Joan's producer. And a good thing to. I can't be with Nikki. So far 3 people have already told me no. _____

Joan Rivers- My next guest is a star on the rising. She has been on 30 teen magazine covers, she has stared in the hit block buster movie of 1983, and she's also staring in the new TV comedy sitcome. Please give it up for our darling, Iman Darlington.

I walk and wave at everyone. Oh my goodness I'm sooo nervous.

Joan Rivers- Hi Iman it's a pleasure to have you.

Iman- it's a pleasure to be here. Thank you.

The interview went very well. By the time she asked me about my family and growing up I was comfortable. But more so because I glanced to the side to see Nikki standing there. It really helped me. I walked off and hugged Nikki. I felt so happy. Hopefully my other interviews would be just like this. _______

"Nikki honestly I don't even know how to thank you for this." I smiled, I felt like a million dollars.

"Well I mean a kiss on the lips would be nice." Nikki turned to me and pouted.

"Keep your eyes on the road Nikki." I chuckled.

"Well I'm kind of hungry we can go out to eat?"

"Nikki your always going out to eat, cant you cook?" I raised an eyebrow.

"No never learned. Can you cook?" He asked with an amused look.

"Yes I can I was taught at a young age."

"So then why don't you cook for me?" He smiled.

I have to admit his smile was so cute and it didn't help that he covered his eyes so that he couldn't be seen. It made him so adorable. Kind of like a lost puppy.

"We have to go to the grocery store."

____

It was weird seeing Nikki in the grocery store. He didnt look like he fitted in with the rest of the customers. But he was so cute picking out fruits and vegetables. People were staring at us, we looked like an odd couple me looking all dolled up like a princess and him looking like a rock star in all leather. Plus he was Nikki Sixx after all, so girls were fawning over him. Actually they kept coming up to him and asking for pictures. So I was left to shop by myself pushing my cart.

"I dont know if crushed Tomatos would be better for a stew." I say to myself.

"I usually use crushed Tomatos for making stew." A voice responded behind me. I turned around and saw a very very handsome man standing behind me.

"Oh do you, and how does it taste?" I asked. "Well.... you can find out your self if you'd like?" He smiled. His teeth were white, Colgate white. He looked sheek and slick. Like someone you would take to go meet your parents. I could tell he was rich as well with the Givenchy suit he was wearing.

"That sounds-"

"Iman!" Nikki called out interrupting me while walking towards me.

"Oh hey Nik." I say scratching behind my neck. Well this is awkward.

"Can I help you?" Nikki asked crossing his arms over his chest sizing the man up.

"Uh I was just helping the young lady decide on a good stew." He smiled nervously.

I could tell Nikki didn't like him already. Nikki seemed like a very jealous type of guy.

"We're leaving now." Nikki grabs my arm and pulls the cart.

We payed for the groceries and headed out to his car. Nikki was quiet during the car ride. He gripped onto the steering wheel tight to the point where his knuckles were turning white.

"Nikki." I called out to him and he ignored me.

"Nikki" I sighed. "He was really helping me with a good stew." I chuckled.

"Iman don't be naieve. He was trying to get your number. You're just a peice of ass to him."

"Wow ok." I looked out the window.

"Look you're mine ok, and I don't want anyone else near you or having you." Nikki spat.

"Nikki you're not my boyfriend I can talk to guys if I want to." It went a bit quiet in the car.

"We'll see about that." Nikki scoffed.

In the truth I liked Nikki but as a friend. I didn't want anything else more than that. ______

We were in the kitchen cooking. And Nikki seriously had no idea what he was doing. I had to give him a really easy task. And that task was boil water, but even that was too hard for him. He kept excusing himself to go to the bathroom and leaving me to watch the water. I decided on making lasagna.

"Hey Nik the lasagna is in the oven so we could just chill and watch TV while we wait." I called out to him.

No response

I walked towards the bathroom and knocked on the door "Hey Sixx you alright?" I called. "Nikki." I knocked on the door again.

"Yeah I'm good I just have a... a runny stomatch is all."

"Oh ok." I walked away.

I walked to the living room and turned on the TV and sat on the couch. It had been a couple minutes and Nikki was still in the bathroom. Finally the door opened and he came out. And he didn't look good.

"Jesus Nikki you look pale, are you alright?" I stood up and cupped his cheeks in my hand.

"Yeah yeah um...I gotta I gotta go ok." He rushed passed me. "But the lasagna Nikki?"

"Just save me some ok princess." He turned back and kissed my forehead and bolted out the door.

Later that Night

I heard the front door open so I came out of my room and saw Theresa, she looked just like Nikki pale and sick with droopy eyes. Something wasn't right and I'm starting to feel like it's drugs. After all she had white powder on her nose in the bathroom at the Rainbow when Nikki took us. _____

February 17, 1985

Nikki called me early in the morning and asked if I wanted to come with him to the recording studio. I agreed, I thought it would be interesting to see how people recorded in a studio. Motley were to be releasing there new album this year.

"Where you off to?" Theresa asked.

"Nikki asked me if I could come to the recording studio with him." I responded while making my self breakfast.

"Do you want something to eat, you look frail?"

"No I don't, and Tamara is not going to be happy with you going any where with Nikki. You know that already." she frowned.

I'm not sure what has gotten into Theresa but she seemed alittle bitter. Maybe even a bit mad.

"Its just them recoding. I'll give you the adress. It's at Cherokee Studios."

"It doesn't matter Iman ok, Nikki is bad news. And so is Robbin. They have been strutting the streets of LA with the guys from Hanoi Rocks as if they are kings of the world." Theresa snapped.

I was so confused at what was going on. "Did Robbin or Nikki do somthing to you?" We were interrupted by a knock at the door. I went to open it and Nikki was there. He looked pale and tired.

"Hey princess you ready?"

"Yeah let me just grab my bag." I say walking to the room. When I came back out Theresa and Nikki didnt say one word to each other. In fact they were scowling at each other. ___

"Oh what's this?" I grabbed a book off the floor of his car. "The Theater of Cruelty." I read. "What's this about?"

"Well, I was reading about the relationship between theater, politics, and culture from the olden days when entertainers who failed to make a king laugh would be put to death."

"Oh that sounds interesting. What's the album called?"

"Originally I was going to call it Entertainment or Death but I changed it to Theater of Pain. And I'll tell you something funny. Our manager Doug Thaler tattooed it on his arm." He laughed.

Nikki's laugh was charming. But when I heard him speak I could tell he was very intellectual. He told me more about what he wanted from the album. But he also said he had only written 5 songs. We arrived at the studio and it was nothing like I have ever seen before. There were two rooms I guess one side was for recording and the other was for mixing the recordings. Mick was sitting on the couch drinking vodka, Tommy was hitting his head on his drums and there was Jack Daniel bottles everywhere with a platter of white substance in it.

"Hey sixx is here Tommy." Mick spoke up. "Hey Iman how are you?"

"Hey Mick I'm good just checking you guys out." I smiled.

"Dude, dude, dude hey long time Iman, why'd you stay away from us?" Tommy ran and picked me up and swung me around.

"I'm sorry I've been really busy. How's your wife Candice?"

"Oh I divorced her crazy ass." Tommy laughed.

They all looked like a mess. Nikki excused himself to go to the bathroom. And when he came back out he sat on the couch and started drinking. His eyes became droopy and he looked like he was about to pass out.

"Dude check this out." Tommy grabbed me and pulled me towards the piano he started playing a tune on it that sounded so nice.

"Wow I love it." I looked over and saw Tommy's drum kit. I had always wanted to sit behind a drum kit. "Soooo uh Tommy can I." I pointed to the drum kit.

"Yeah dude c'mon." He pulled me and I sat in front of him and he kneeled behind me. He took my hand in his and started hitting the drums slow. "Mmmmm you smell good." Tommy smiled at me.

I turned my head to the side to look at him and smiled back. "Well it's the lotion I use." I smirked

"I'd love to try some of that lotion but not from the bottle." Tommy joked.

I turned around and saw Nikki glaring at us. He did not look happy. As a matter of fact he was clenching his jaw.

The door all of a sudden opens and in walks Vince. When Vince arrived at the studio there was no tearful reunion. It was awkward in there, very awkward. I at least broke the tension and got up to give him a hug. "Hey how are you feeling?" I broke the hug "Not too good but im getting there. Thanks for asking." He walked passed me and headed to the guys.

"Hey." Vince spoke to the guys.

"Hey." Nikki spoke up.

"Um here are the lyrics."

"Home sweet home" Vince looked up at Nkkki.

"Yeah it's been too long brother." Nikki smiled. "Here, have a bump with me." Nikki picked up the silver platter and handed it to Vince.

Vince leaned down and snorted what I now know is drugs off of the silver platter. My eyes went wide when I saw Vince cover up his mouth and run to the garbage throwing everything up.

"What the fuck was that?" Vince asked.

"Smack, man," Nikki told him

"Smack? What the fuck are you doing that for?"

"Because it's cool."

"Jesus you're fucked up, fuck you!! I know what you guys are all thinking. Yeah I'm the bad guy I killed Razzle but it could have happened to anyone of you!" Vince shouted and left the studio.

"Nice job Nikki." Mick spoke up. ______

Nikki dropped me back at Theresa's place, and walked me upstairs.

"So you gonna let me come in?" He moved closer to me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Nope." I responded popping the p.

"Your a tough one. Most girls are begging to be with me. But you...you keep running away from me. Why's that?" He chuckled as he pulled me in closer.

"Cause I'm not like those rocker girls you talk to." I whispered. He leaned down closing the gap between us and I pulled away. "Why do you do drugs Nikki?" I asked.

His eyes went wide.

"Princess I only snort coke that's it."

"Yeah but even that is bad."

Nikki glared at me and clenched his jaw. "I have to go." He told me.

"Nikki wait I'm telling you this as your friend it's not-

"Just mind your own buissness Iman, ok!" He snapped and cut me off.

"Ok." I said quietly. He stormed off and walked away. All I could say was that Nikki is definitely trouble.

#nikki sixx #tommy lee #mick mars #motley crue #motley #sikki #80s #rocknroll #model

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the--blackdahlia · 5 years

Text

Too Young to Fall in Love Chapter 51 (Dirt!Nikki x Reader)

Title: Too Young to Fall in Love 51

Summary: Nikki Sixx was a hard partying musician on the strip. He never expected to fall in love with anyone, until a girl knocked on his dressing room door looking for a ride home and took his breath away. Just like everything else Nikki did; the drugs, the money, the music; Nikki went hard with love. (Y/n) Bass never expected the bassist of Motley Crue to be the one to shake her calm and calculated life up. She had a plan. Graduate school, become an epic producer, and watch from behind the scenes as her brother’s band rose to fame. Nikki and (Y/n) were perfect for each other, too bad her brother, Tommy, didn’t think so.

Series warnings: Smut (18+ Please), drug use, language, referenced miscarriage, drug overdose, mentioned attempted suicide, out of character moments for everyone in the band, the timeline might be a little screwy but it’s fanfiction! I know nothing of music production and my medical knowledge is really screwy, so it won’t be accurate.

A few months later

“Babe! I’m home!” Nikki called out as he came through the door. “Stopped at the bakery and got the cake! And those cupcakes you like!” It was quiet downstairs. “Babe?” He sat the baked goods on the island and headed into the house. He made his way to the nursery, where he could hear music playing. (Y/n) was decorating, wanting everything to look perfect.

“(Y/n).” Nikki said softly. She jumped and turned to look at him.

“You scared me!” She laughed. “So, what do you think?” They had went with softer, neutral tones, and the paint had just finished drying, so (Y/n) was putting up all the decorations. Cute little animals playing instruments.

“It’s perfect.” Nikki smiled and wrapped his arms around her, his hands resting on her bump. “Everything is amazing.” He kissed on her neck, holding her close. She moaned softly, then glanced at the time on the watch Nikki was wearing.

“Shit!” She called out. “Everyone’s going to be here in like an hour or two!” She pulled away from Nikki. “I need to get a shower and...and…”

“Babe, relax.” Nikki smiled. “I got the cake. Pizza is scheduled. You just go get a shower and calm down, okay.” He kissed her gently.

“What would I do without you?” (Y/n) asked, kissing him again.

“Be a lonely, but still a really hot, producer in New York.” He smiled at her. “Or be married to Bret Michaels.”

“Oh, don’t remind me of that.” (Y/n) shook her head. “Okay, I’m getting in the shower. Be out in a bit.” She headed towards the bathroom while Nikki went downstairs to get ready for their guests; Vince and Vanessa with Dean and Samantha, Tommy and his new girlfriend (Pamela had the boys this week), Athena and her new husband, and Mick going solo, as well as (Y/n)’s parents. Tonight was the gender reveal. Nikki and (Y/n) didn’t even know what they were having yet. The doctor had wrote it on a slip of paper and put it into an envelope, which (Y/n) took to the bakery to have a cake made. It was chocolate icing, but inside would either be pink or blue.

About an hour and a half later, the pizza arrived, along with Mick and (Y/n)’s parents. Mick helped Nikki get it all set up while (Y/n) finished getting ready. Vince, Vanessa, and the twins were next, followed by Athena and her husband James, and then there was Tommy, being fashionably late, but no girlfriend in sight.

“She, uh, didn’t want to come.” Tommy shrugged. He leaned over to Nikki. “I haven’t been dating. Don’t tell (Y/n). She worries about me after prison.”

“Well, I wonder why.” Nikki laughed. “It’s cool man. Your secret is safe with me.”

“So, when do we find out what this little sucker is.” Vince asked (Y/n) as she walked past him.

“Once we cut the cake but this pizza smells really good.” She grabbed a few pieces and smiled down at the twins. “You both are just so cute!”

“Well, Dean keeps stealing Sammy’s bow all the time, and Sammy likes to bite.” Vanessa laughed. “Those two are going to be a handful. You think your brother and your husband are the terror twins? I think my little pumpkins here are.”

Conversation flowed throughout the evening, Tommy giving vague answers when asked about his girlfriend and Mick saying he was just fine being single. Vanessa and Vince alternated between feeding the twins and feeding themselves. (Y/n) smiled. This was her family. She never thought in a million years that the most notorious band in metal would be sitting together in her living room, waiting for a gender reveal while making small talk like they hadn’t just been doing coke off of naked strippers about ten years ago.

“Okay guys, are we ready?” (Y/n) asked, standing up. Nikki and (Y/n) made their way to the kitchen, everyone else in tow. The cake sat there, ready to be cut. Nikki handed (Y/n) the utensils.

“Be my guest.” Nikki told her, kissing her cheek. (Y/n) cook a deep breath and cut a piece, laying it out on a plate.

A pink cake.

“We’re having a girl!” (Y/n) gasped, hugging Nikki. “Oh my god!”

“We’re having a girl!” Nikki echoed, holding his wife close to him. He had never dreamed that he would be a dad to a little girl. She was going to be so loved and protected, because she had not only her three uncles in the room who wouldn’t hesitate to hurt anyone who hurt her, but a long list of musicians that Nikki and (Y/n) had befriended over the years.

Nikki and (Y/n) Sixx were having a girl.

****

“I don’t know anything about shopping for girls.” Tommy said. “At least, not baby girls. Big girls though, I can buy for.” Tommy said as they passed by Victoria Secret.

“Vanessa was in charge of getting everything for Sammy, so I’m at a loss.” Vince shrugged.

“I haven’t bought baby clothes since the 1970’s. And I’m pretty sure I was drunk then.” Mick added. Nikki sighed. He should’ve just invited Slash or something to join him on this mall trip. He wanted to start buying clothes for the yet unnamed baby. He might have been going overboard with buying baby stuff here recently. Most people assumed that the mother would be the one going crazy. But not in (Y/n) and Nikki’s case. Nikki wanted everything to be absolutely perfect.

“So, any names yet?” Tommy asked as he looked at a display in the window at a music store. A small poster was hanging in the window, with a picture of him at his kit that said “Tommy Lee Uses Vater”. “Dudes, check me out!”

“Good thing we’re not visiting a music store in the 1980’s. Sober Tommy pointing out every picture of himself would get real old, real fast.” Mick grumbled.

“I should’ve just left you losers at home.” Nikki sighed. They headed into the baby store, looking extremely out of place. Vince had recently died his hair a deep red, Tommy looked like he had been pulled from the hip-hop block on VH1, Mick looked like an old man shopping for his grandchild, and Nikki was in all black with tattoos.

“Can...can I help you?” A young girl greeted them.

“My wife and I are having our first child, a baby girl, and I might be going a tiny bit overboard.”

“Oh, congratulations, well we have a great selection of girl clothes over here,” she gushed and showed him all the latest clothes for baby girls.

Nikki and the guys all looked at all the ruffles and pink around them. “Do you think she’s be mad if I dyed some of this black?”

“I think there’s a store on the strip that has baby clothes,” Tommy told them.

“I guess we can try,” Nikki shook his head, “I’ll buy some of this just in case though. I don’t want her getting mad at me.”

“Man, she is so laid back about this. Compared to Nessa pregnant, she’s pretty chill.” Vince told him.

“And her favorite color is black.” Mick shrugged.

“True,” Nikki nodded. “Then let’s go Crue!”

****

“Look at this onesie!” Tommy called out. “It’s so cute!”

“Yeah, but her dad isn’t the drummer dumbass.” Vince said, smacking the back of his head. Everything in the store was rock based, and Nikki had already found a couple

“Can I get it custom?” He asked. “My uncle is the best drummer in the world type of thing?” Vince found matching t-shirts for the twins. He wasn’t sure if Vanessa would actually put them on the kids, but they were cute.

“Hey, aren’t you those guys from Motley Crue?” A guy asked.

“Uh, yeah.” Nikki said, looking over at him.

“Dude! You guys were so awesome! I got laid for the first time when Home Sweet Home was playing.” He high fived Tommy then headed about his shopping. The guys looked at each other with smiles on their faces.

“Oh man this looks good,” Nikki said as he grabbed a onesie. It was a Motley Crue onesie, black with pink trim and the band's name in pink.

“Get it. I dare you.” Tommy laughed.

“You don’t have to dare me,” he laughed, “I’m getting it”

“Baby Aphrodite is going to be the best dressed baby in all of LA.” Tommy laughed.

“Not naming my daughter after a Greek goddess. Especially not Aphrodite.” Nikki shook his head. “(Y/n) have a few ideas for names. But we’re not certain on anything until we meet her.”

“What? Are you thinking of something like Olive or something?” Vince asked with a laugh. Nikki stayed quiet. “Wait, really?”

“I said that we’ll know for sure when we see her.” Nikki told him again, grabbing another onesie. “But yes, Olive is on the list.”

“Olive Sixx.” Mick said as they bought the stuff and headed out.

“I didn’t say we had a great list. Just that we had a list.” Nikki pointed out. “It’s a work in progress but we still have some time.”

“Ok, dudes I’m starving let’s go eat.” Tommy smiled and clapped his hands together.

“When are you not starving?” Mick asked. Nikki pulled out the little onesie and smiled, running his fingers on the fabric. He was going to be a dad, and he knew he was going to be a better parent than his ever were.

****

“I feel so fat.” (Y/n) groaned as she sat on the couch with Vanessa, watching the twins on the floor. “My feet are swollen, my ankles are the size of an elephant, I’m either sad, horny, or hungry. There’s no in between.”

“Welcome to pregnancy,” Vanessa smiled. “But you look gorgeous. And I bet Nikki can’t get his hands off you.”

“He said that he’s already looking forward to more kids.” (Y/n) told her. “But I look awful. I don’t get where ya’ll are getting this gorgeous look from or whatever.”

Vanessa hugged her, “because you are drop dead gorgeous (Y/n) Sixx!” Vanessa looked to the twins and sighed as they crawled around the small space they made in the living room for them. “Nikki not able to get his hands off you should be proof of that.”

“How are you and Vince doing?” (Y/n) asked. “Last I heard, you were convincing him to get snipped.”

“Well, I’m good with just two. Plus he has his two other kids so four kids for him should be good enough,” Vanessa sighed. “I just don’t want to risk anything bad happening.”

“Nothing bads gonna happen.” (Y/n) rubbed her arms. “And, if you decide you want another set of twins later on, it can be reversed.” She teased Vanessa. She watched as Dean reached out and stole Sammy’s bow, making her cry and try to bite her brother. “Wow, you were right about that.”

“Terror twins! I told you.” Vanessa took the bow from Dean and fixed Sammy’s hair.

“The boys are going to drop a new album soon. I just hope the tour is after the baby comes.” (Y/n) sighed. “Could you imagine me being in labor and Nikki in Europe?”

“That would drive him crazy,” Vanessa laughed. “But aren’t you in charge of scheduling it? Since it’s the label you guys created?”

“He’s not letting me do anything.” (Y/n) sighed. “I think the miscarriage from the 80’s still haunts him. He wants me to take it easy. I’m going stir crazy.”

“Talk to him hun,” Vanessa smiled. “I mean I can understand where he’s coming from but you guys are past the miscarriage point.”

“I know we are, he knows we are, but he’s still scared.” (Y/n) told her. “He’ll still wake up in the middle of the night, pull me to him, and tell me he’s sorry. It’s been years Nessa.”

Before Vanessa could reply the guys came back with bags on their arms. Nikki walked up to (Y/n) and kissed her on her head.

“How are you feeling?” he put the bags down.

“I’m okay.” (Y/n) smiled. “Think I can do some work for the label soon?”

“As long as you don’t get stressed I think we’re ok?” he held on closely to her.

“Nessa! I got some shirts for the twins.” Vince said excitedly. One was blue, one was pink. Both said “I’m cute, mom’s hot, dad’s lucky”. “What do you think?”

Vanessa smiled at him, “I love them and you’re still getting snipped,” she gave him a pat on his cheek before handing Dean to him. “Your son loves to make his sister cry, and your daughter loves to bite.”

“Well, as long as it keeps the boys away, right my little man?” Vince asked, smiling at Dean. Dean gave Vince the biggest smile. Nikki pulled out the small camera (Y/n) had bought him when she found out she was pregnant and snapped a picture of him and Vince. The small camera came in handy when he was on the go.

“Someday we’ll have camera phones. That’s what the guy on TV said the other day. That soon, we’ll have really good cameras and computers in our pockets.” Tommy told them.

“Yeah, but nothing will beat the real thing.” Nikki laughed.

“So, when is the pregnancy photoshoot?” Vanessa asked. (Y/n) looked at Nikki. They hadn’t really thought of it, but (Y/n)’s mom had been bugging her about it so she could send pictures back to Greece. Nikki smiled at (Y/n) and rubbed her back.

“Well, maybe we could plan something out in the backyard with Jett and Ziggy.” He shrugged. “I know they’re just going to love their little sister.”

“But I look like a house.” (Y/n) groaned. “I don’t want anyone to see me like this. It’s bad enough you guys see me like this.”

“At least she’s not throwing stuff at him.” Vince mumbled under his breath.

Vanessa smacked him lightly, “honey, you look lovely! I can help you with hair and makeup.”

“But…” (Y/n) sighed.

“No. It’s going to be great!” Tommy told her. “As long as there are clothes on in the photoshoot, I’ll be happy.”

“Yeah, I was going to do a naked photoshoot to send to your aunts in Greece.” Nikki sighed. “Seriously, where did all the brains go?”

“My little sister stole them.” Tommy said, not sure if he was insulting himself or complimenting her.

“You could always save the naked ones for your private collection,” Vanessa smiled.

“Oh, I already have plenty of those.” Nikki teased.

“Gross!” Tommy called out. “I don’t need to think about that.”

****

(Y/n) sat on a bench, her hands resting on her belly while Nikki snapped the pictures. Ziggy and Jett had posed in a few, but a squirrel ran by and Nikki hadn’t been able to reel them back in. So (Y/n) was going solo for the rest of them.

“Are you sure you don’t want to be in them dad?” (Y/n) called out to Nikki. “I mean, it’s not just me that was involved in this!”

“I could set the timer,” Nikki said as he grabbed his tripod and began to line the shot. “Ok, so everything is set.” (Y/n) stood up so Nikki could run over and wrap his arms around her and place his hands on her belly. Once he got the time set, he did just that. (Y/n) leaned back against him as the camera went off.

“I bet you look very handsome in it.” (Y/n) said with a smile.

“You look better,” he muttered as he kissed her as the camera went off again. They took a handful more pictures before Nikki went to develop them. (Y/n) lounged outside.

“Your daddy and I love you very much sweetheart.” (Y/n) whispered to her belly. “We can’t wait to meet you.” She rubbed small circles and smiled. She had never thought she would be this happy. She looked at the house with loving eyes. Soon, they would have a family there.

****

“Vanessa, my belly feels tight.” (Y/n) told her a few months later. They were out and about for the day while the boys did interviews and made their rounds. “And little miss thing is all over the place. It’s like she’s breakdancing or something.”

“She might be getting ready to come out,” Vanessa gave her a smile.

“You think?” (Y/n) asked. “Nikki will be in a panic if I’m not with him when I go into labor. You know it as well as I do.” She laughed a little.

“Well she sin;t going to come out today, I hope,” Vanessa chuckled. “But it sounds like she’s getting herself in the position to come out.”

“Dramatic, just like your daddy,” (Y/n) sighed. “Gotta make sure you make a big entrance and put on a show, right?” She rubbed at her belly. She looked at he stroller the twins were in. “Nessa, you’ve got to see this. Get the camera from my purse.” She told her. The twins were fast asleep holding hands.

Vanessa grabbed the camera and smiled as she took the picture, "I need to get a copy of this."

"Of course." (Y/n) smiled but then groaned.

“(Y/n)? Are you ok?” Vanessa rushed to her. “Maybe I should call Nikki.”

"She’s mad about something." She rubbed her stomach. "I...maybe we should call. But he's on TV with the boys."

Vanessa pulled out her phone and called Nikki, “Damn it.” she cursed, “It’s going to voicemail.”

"Leave a message and I'll just go on." (Y/n) gasped. "Little lady your daddy will be upset if you come before he gets here."

Vanessa left Nikki a message as she led (Y/n) back to the car, “I’m taking you to the hospital.” she said. “I think they should check you out in case you are in labor.”

"Okay, not gonna argue." They got the twins in the car and headed towards the hospital.

****

"I heard a cell phone while we were on stage." Tommy checked his. "Wasn’t mine."

“It was mine,” Nikki sighed. “This is Vanessa’s number,” he put the phone to his ear. “She thinks (Y/n) is going into labor. I got to go.” NIkki rushed out of the studio before the guys could say a word.

“Didn’t we come with him?” Vince looked at the guys.

"Nikki wait!" Mick called out. "Your our ride!"

The guys all rushed after him and piled into the car. Nikki drove like a bat out of hell to get to the hospital. He tripped over himself as he ran to the nurses station gasping for air.

“Wife… in… labor…. Friend… brought… where?” he gasped.

"Nikki!" Vanessa called out. "She’s in being seen." Just then (y/n) came out.

"Guys?" (Y/n) asked.

Nikki rushed to her voice and went in side, “(Y/n) I’m here. Are you ok?” Nikki rushed to hold her hand. “Is little lady coming out?”

"No not yet. she just is being a dramatic little girl." (Y/n) smiled. "Are you ok?"

"I… you…baby…" he tried to catch his breath. "I got scared I was going to miss it."

"Guess she's running drills." (Y/n) laughed.

“Once I get you home I’m going to have to come up with something so I don’t miss the real thing,” he smiled.

"What if you're on stage or at another interview? It could be on the national news." (Y/n) laughed.

"Then everyone is going to know that little lady is here to rule the world," he caressed her cheek and kissed her.

“So you’re okay?” Tommy asked, sounding a little worried. (Y/n) smiled.

“Yes Tommy. Honestly, just tired right now.” (Y/n) told her brother.

“Little lady wanted to keep us on our toes,” Nikki chuckled a bit. “She’s good, and I about had a panic attack.”

“I’m sorry honey.” (Y/n) told him. “I’m ready to go take a nap. Do you have to go back anywhere?”

“Nope I think that was our last interview,” Nikki looked at the guys who gave him a thumbs up.

“Good. Now which cute guy wants to take me home.” (Y/n) laughed, giving Nikki a smirk.

“Hey,” Nikki pinched her nose playfully. “Only cute guy taking you home is this guy!”

“I said cute. Not extremely handsome.” She smiled and kissed him.

“Hey now. No kissing. Kissing leads to more babies once that one comes out.” Tommy laughed. “Go rest. Who knows when my niece is going to make her world debut.”

“Come on sweet girl,” Nikki smiled. “Let’s get you home.” He led her out to the car. Vanessa kissed Vince.

“How much did he freak out?” She asked, looking at him and the other guys.

“He almost left us at the TV station after the interview,” Vince shrugged and smiled. “How did the kids do with you guys?”

“(Y/n) has a picture she’s going to have Nikki print off for us. But the babies were asleep in their stroller holding hands.” Vanessa to him with a big smile.

“I don’t know why, but I have a feeling that little lady is going to make her appearance at the most inconvenient time.” Mick told them with a shrug.

“Now that's what I want to see,” Tommy said as they all watched Nikki help (Y/n) into the car. “I kind of want to see him freak out when it actually happens… remind me to get the camcorder ready though.”

“Oh, we won’t let him live that down.” Vince laughed.

“Wait, Nikki’s taking (Y/n) home. He was our ride.” Mick told Tommy. Mick and Tommy turned to look at Vince and Vanessa, giving them little pouts and puppy eyes.

“Come on you clowns,” Vanessa sighed. “But that means you’re on baby duty!”

“Hehe, she said duty.” Tommy laughed. Vince handed him Dean. “What’s that smell?”

“That’d be the duty.” Vince laughed.

“WHAT?” Tommy smelled Dean and put him at arm's length. “Dude that is not funny! He smells like one of Nikki’s old pairs of underwear from the Theater of Pain tour!”

“I don’t want to know how you know what the smells like.” Vanessa shook her head. “Give me my son, I’ll change him and you can walk home.” Tommy sighed and looked at Vince. He hadn’t really changed too many diapers, since Pamela did most of that.

“Come on drummer, I’ll show you how it’s done.” Mick grumbled, taking the diaper bag from Vanessa and leading him to the bathroom to help him change the baby.

Forever Tags: @anathewierdo @dekahg @marvel-af-imagines @feelmyroarrrr @nanie5 @imboredsueme @gemini0410 @aiaranradnay @babypink224221 @mogarukes @xxwarhawk @sandlee44 @shatteredabby @caswinchester2000 @supernaturalwincestsblog @lauravic @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @teller258316 @horrorpxnk @tommyleeownsme @marvelismylifffe

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Too Young to Fall in Love Tags: @kingbouji3 @leximus98 @thekidbakerinthetardis @crystalbaby12 @shawnsstxtches @knockemdeadgirl @deansgirl1993 @haileynicoleseavey17

#too young to fall in love #Motley Crue #nikki sixx #nikki sixx x reader #nikki x reader #the dirt #dirt!nikki sixx #dirt!nikki sixx x reader #dirt!nikki x reader #dirt!nikki #fanfiction

47 notes · View notes

gothpanda · 4 years

Text

A Little Bit of Attitude Ch.22: Some Visitors

WORD COUNT: 5.6K

A/N: The flashback is for my own pleasure as i just found out Motley played at my small ass town in ‘83

TAGS: @madamsixx

WARNINGS: none

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April 12, 1984

Laredo, Texas

The sound of Ozzy could be heard throughout the west side of Laredo. The Bordertown getting a taste of rock music for once from its usual Mexican bands. It was already warm like summer down in this part of Texas, making Sammi feel at home. The warm air pleased all the guys, breaking out of the winter clothes finally. Laredo's venue was the most different from all of them, seeing a high school right next to the Civic Center and two different types of buildings. One being an auditorium for ballet, and the other just open space for the guys. In the stone courtyard in the middle of everything, Sammi sat on the fountain, hearing the water cascade down while smoking her first cigarette of the night. She could see the small crowd of kids her age at the gate of the civic center, hoping for a chance to either meet someone or listen to music. Sammi felt a light hand push her head down, turning to see Nikki smirk down at her.

“May I sit?” asked Nikki, Sammi nodded silently. He sat next to her, staying silent as he pulled out a cigarette for himself, flattered to see a light already waiting for him to take. They stayed silent for a while until Nikki began coughing uncontrollably.

“You okay there, Nik?” asked Sammi, patting Nikki on the back to help him in some way.

“Yeah. Yeah I’m good,” answered Nikki, clearing his throat. “Just getting smokers lungs faster than I thought. I thought I had a good two years left! Cruel world!” Nikki yelled out into the night sky, shaking his fist in the air and proud to hear Sammi giggle. She playfully shoved Nikki’s bare shoulder, shaking her head at him. “Idiot,” mumbled Sammi, stepping on the small cigarette bud.

“Hey, it takes one to know one. Have you met Tommy and Vince? Don’t get how you and Mick don’t want to hurt us,” said Nikki.

“Oh I know I do, but I don’t feel like getting yelled at by my parents. Or get arrested for domestic violence,” joked Sammi, smiled right at Nikki, her pinky lightly grazing Nikki’s. Nikki felt his body become stiff for a moment, looking away at the girl.

“I would pay to see that fight between you and blondie. Might help you,” uttered Nikki, finishing his cigarette for the night.

“Of course you’d be up for that. It’s not like he’s your friend or anything,” provoked Sammi, poking Nikki’s cheek.

“He’s barely even my singer. I only tolerate him because of you fucking Bass siblings,” said Nikki, shoving away Sammi’s hand.

“Why don’t you like him?” asked Sammi.

Nikki raised an eyebrow to Sammi. “You really wanna know?” Sammi nodded. “Maybe because the son of a bitch got something I wanted, but I could just take it from him if I tried hard enough,” answered Nikki, lowering his face right to Sammi, seeing her eyes change from teasing to nervous.

“Nikki… don’t,” begged Sammi, slowly moving away from him.

“And why not Princess? There’s a nice difference between us. I stay with a girl I like,” said Nikki, tucking a piece of hair behind Sammi’s ear. “And Vince has wandering eyes if you haven’t noticed yet,”

Sammi swallowed hard, “I trust him. Please just leave it alone for now,”

“Alright I will, but you’ll always know where to find me,” said Nikki, kissing Sammi on her forehead before disappearing back into the sound of Ozzy. Sammi bit the nail of her thumb, thoughts running at a rapid pace. She didn’t even feel Vince slide right next to her, making Sammi jump when feeling his hands.

“There’s my girl. Are you okay? You look like you have a lot on your mind?” asked Vince. Sammi nodded, kissing Vince before he can think of any further questions.

"Of course I am. Let's just stay here," whispered Sammi, pulling Vince for another kiss, this time harder to make him truly forget any questions.

July 1st, 1985

On the nightstand by the bed, a clock reading 7:45 rang out in the spacious white bedroom. Sammi tossed onto her side, slamming the clock to stop beeping while letting out a morning groan. Sammi rubbed away the sleep from her eyes, aiming to not fall back into a deep sleep. When Sammi started to feel more awake, it dawned on her the silence in the room. No one was snoring in her ear. Rising slowly, Sammi turned to find an empty spot next to her. The duvet looked almost done as if Nikki made the bed before he left. A note from a torn notebook paper laid on the pillow, messy handwriting in black pen yet still blurry for Sammi to read. Sammi put on her glasses, bringing the piece of paper close to her face.

‘Sorry I had to leave, Princess. Didn’t want to wake your pretty face up. Thanks for the special attention. Call you later- Nikki”

Sammi scuffed at the note, a tiny smile crawling on her lips. She tossed it by her lamp, rubbing her face slowly to stay awake. “At least he left a note this time,” muttered Sammi, ripping off the heavy blue blanket, jumping off the bed to seize the day. Sammi looked at the black mini pencil skirt and purple blouse that hung on the closet door, happy with her professional wardrobe. Cascading down the small apartment hallway, Sammi entered her bathroom to head straight to the shower, the water running cold as Sammi liked it. She carried on with her morning routine of applying light makeup and curling her hair, halting as the phone in the bedroom rang out. Sammi ran into the room, jumping on the bed to quickly pick up the telephone, holding it up against her ear as she deeply scrunched her eyebrows.

“Hello?” responded Sammi, sitting on her bed.

“Good morning, Sammi. It’s Doc, how are you doing?” said Doc on the line.

“Oh, I’m doing good, just getting ready for work. What’s going on?” asked Sammi, checking her clock as reassurance she wasn’t wasting time.

“I just wanted to quickly let you know, we are going to Elektra for a meeting. I don’t know if Mr. Harrison told you,” Sammi closed her eyes tight for a second, trying to not mess up her done hair. Sammi knew Mr. Harrison told her last Friday about some meetings, but she completely blocked it out after drinking the night away. She didn’t feel the need to ask that day. Now Sammi wished she could take a sick day.

“Uh yes. Yes he did Doc. I’m one of his secretaries, remember?” said Sammi with sarcasm, smiling a small bit with nerves setting in. Nikki was beginning to rub off on her in his mannerisms. Sammi questioned if this was a good thing for her.

“Right. Of course. I only wanted to give you a heads up about Vince before your day started. Since it could be very difficult to see him in person after a while,” said Doc. Sammi smiled to herself, lucky to still have Doc care for her.

“I really appreciate it, Doc. Thank you for looking out for me,” sincerely said Sammi, “So, I should probably give you a heads up so you don’t go in blind to the meeting,”

“Harrison still worried about the boys?” asked Doc.

“It’s more him being worried about his money going down the toilet than anything else. You really need to be prepared to get your ass chewed or get a cold man,” said Sammi, pressing her lips tight together. She saw the time begin to creep up again, eyes shooting wide. “Doc, I really have to be getting ready. I’ll see you at the meeting,”

“Okay, thanks Sammi. See you soon,” said Doc, cutting the line before Sammi could. Sammi shut the phone, dropping back onto the bed, smothering herself with a pillow as she groaned out loud. Her nerves became setting in more while thinking about seeing Vince for the first time. Sammi began thinking of excuses to not participate in this meeting, rushing to the kitchen for some breakfast. Her mind was turning almost empty, going into autopilot as she got ready for the rest of her day.

Sammi looked out the car window, eyes following Sabrina walk out of her apartment building, coming straight to the passenger door. Sammi smiled in a blink second at Sabrina, driving off into the busy morning traffic. Silence filled the car ride, unusual for the two on their carpool rides. Sabrina eyed Sammi for a moment, changing the radio station to get a reaction for the music. Nothing. Sabrina narrowed her eyes at Sammi, seeing her only focused on the freeway.

“You good? Did Nikki piss you off this morning?” asked Sabrina, relaxing in the passenger seat.

“What? No, we’re fine. why?” replied Sammi, glancing at Sabrina quickly.

“Well, you just seem quiet for a morning. Did you get into an argument with Athena?” said Sabrina.

“No, we’re fine. She hasn't done anything to annoy me for a while,” replied Sammi.

“And she’s not asking Emma 100 questions?” asked Sabrina again.

“No, Emma is doing a pretty good job at hiding which I feel kind of bad for,” muttered Sammi, tucking a hair behind her ear.

“Yeah but Athena doesn’t need to know about Nikki if it’s not serious business. Emma can handle holding a little truth to Athena. She would’ve spilled already if she couldn’t,”

“Oh, by the way, we are gonna have some visitors at work,” mumbled Sammi, staring up at a traffic light. Sabrina raised an eyebrow to Sammi, “Motley’s coming for a meeting with Mr. H,” added Sammi with a glare.

“Oh shit. That’s gonna be fucking awkward,” muttered Sabrina.

“Thanks, S! You know how to lift my spirits in times of need!” sarcastically barked Sammi with a fake smile.

“I’m sorry, but come on you know how bad everyone is towards each other. It’s not like Motley is a happy family band that don’t piss people off especially not each other,”

“Yes I know, but you couldn’t be optimistic as we’re pulling up to work?” asked Sammi.

“You really want me to give you extremely fake hope?” Sabrina uttered blandly, almost hurting to say words.

“Yep!”

“Fine! Things could be completely great and Mr. H won’t chew their asses. It is all good!” shouted Sabrina as Sammi pulled into an empty parking lot space of the office building. Sammi rolled her eyes, glaring at Sabrina who didn’t want to sugarcoat things so early on this Monday morning. Turning off the ignition and opening the door, Sammi left Sabrina hanging but hearing her catch up behind. Sabrina’s long legs made it easier to speed walk right by Sammi in comparison to her short stature. “Okay, maybe the meeting won’t be the worst thing ever. Do you know what they’re gonna be discussing?” asked Sabrina, opening the glass door for Sammi as they entered the building. The girls did their routine of polite smiles to anyone that passed by them, heading to the elevators. Sammi smashed the up button, leaning against the wall. “I have no idea, Mr. Harrison really doesn’t explain in great detail to anyone,” uttered Sammi. Sabrina was about to speak until more people gathered around the two girls, entering the elevator with them. Sammi and Sabrina glanced at each other, stuffed into the cramped elevator with unknown people.

In a short time, the girls were finally alone again, walking out to their respected work areas. “I just don’t want them to make a fucking scene to anyone. I’m expecting the worst reactions when Mr. Harrison orders them around,” muttered Sammi to Sabrina. The girls came to a halt in the middle of cubicles when suddenly, a young intern came walking fast, holding a notepad against her chest. “Hi, Sabrina! Hi, Sammi!” said the intern with enthusiasm.

“Hi, Jessica…” the girls said in unison, almost groaning at the sight of her. Jessica smiled happily, Sammi not understanding how someone could be so cheerful this early in the day.

“How’s your guys morning going? It’s such a beautiful summer day!” exclaimed Jessica, having a pep in her step.

“Great. What do you want?” asked bluntly Sammi, crossing her arms as Sabrina withheld a smirk.

“I came to tell Sabrina something. We’re needed in the conference room right now to set stuff up for a meeting. Apparently, all of Motley Crue is coming!” excited Jessica was, only making Sammi sulk more, infuriated.

“Why me? I’m not gonna be an intern anymore after next week,” asked Sabrina. Scowling at Jessica.

“But you’re still an intern… come on if we finish early maybe we can catch Motley walking in,” said Jessica, bouncing on the balls of her feet with a smile.

“A little too excited to see a band, aren’t we Jessica? It’s not like you haven’t seen one walk around here before” teased Sammi, giving a smile that made Jessica scared of the girls. Sabrina biting down on her index finger, not caring if Sammi hurts someone’s feelings today. It was fun to see sometimes.

“Well, they are a cool band. Plus they aren’t bad to look at, especially Nikki. That’s all,” mumbled Jessica, feeling small to Sammi even when being the same height.

“Sorry to burst your bubble Jess, but I don’t think you’re very much Nikki’s type. Trust me, we’re pretty close,” said Sammi, patting Jessica on the arm, hearing Sabrina chuckle at them. Jessica pressed her lips tightly, shoulders falling a bit.

“Besides I already get to see Motley on a normal basis anyway. They’re not that rare to see after a while,” added Sabrina.

“I’m gonna head to my desk. Have fun arranging water bottles,” Sammi told Sabrina, walking from the two without caring of Jessica’s feelings. Jessica looked up at Sabrina with big eyes only getting a shrug from the taller girl.

“You really should’ve seen that one coming, Jessica,” said Sabrina walking past the redhead to her desk. Jessica only followed the girls' footsteps, ready to work.

Sammi knocked on the heavy wooden doors, MR. HARRISON displayed on a gold plaque.

“Come in,” Mr. Harrison announced, Sammi pushing the door open. “Oh good morning, Samantha, how are we doing on this Monday?” asked Mr. Harrison, peeking above his leather notebook while sitting behind his expensive glass desk.

“Pretty good. I’m just happy to start another week, and be with my favorite boss,” said Sammi, smiling as she stood right in front of Mr. Harrison with perfect posture.

“Oh you flatter me, Samantha, but that please save it for when you’re trying to leave early on Fridays. I hope you remembered the meeting I told you on Friday. You’ll need to write down everything I say because I have a feeling I’ll be too busy talking my head off,” said Mr. Harrison, shutting his notebook tight to hand over to Sammi. Sammi took the notebook in her hands but began thinking for a moment.

“I’m sorry sir, but don’t you think it could be more beneficial to have an intern write your notes. Take Jessica for example who can get more practice since she just started,” explained Sammi, still putting on a generous smile for more convincing.

Mr. Harrison frowned hard at Sammi, his forehead wrinkles becoming deep crevasses. “Are you sure you aren’t just coming up with excuses to avoid this meeting with a certain band?” asked Mr. Harrison.

“Of course not, sir,” uttered Sammi.

“Well while I appreciate your care for the interns, you are going to be at the meeting right next to me rather you like it or not,” ordered Mr. Harrison, making Sammi drop her shoulders for a moment. She nodded, beginning to head to the doors until Mr. Harrison interrupted her walk. “I do have a question, Samantha. What are you going to do now that you have a degree?” asked Mr. Harrison. Sammi walked back slowly as she thought of an answer.

“I really don’t know. I’m just going to be working until I feel I should go back to school,” answered Sammi.

Mr. Harrison nodded slowly, “Well if you need any help, I do have connections with people in different medical branches. All you need to do is ask,”

“Thank you, Mr. Harrison, I appreciate it,” said Sammi, turning around as a gentle knock came from outside of her bosses office. Jessica peeked her head behind the heavy door, shuffling into the office.

“Sorry to interrupt but Motley Crue is here Mr. Harrison,” said Jessica in a small soft voice.

“Huh, they’re on time for once. Thank you, Jessica. Come along, Samantha,” said Mr. Harrison, fixing his blazer as he stepped to the door, smiling at the two young girls. Sammi rolled her eyes, grabbing a pen from the desk to act as an employee with no connections to this band. Jessica stood by the doorframe, eyes following Sammi get closer to her. Sammi scowled at Jessica staring at her, halting in front of her.

“Can I help you with something? Or are you just gonna keep staring?” barked Sammi, walking away from the nervous young girl.

Mr. Harrison marched down the halls of the office floor, Sammi being his shadow all the way to the conference room. Sammi straightened her posture, balancing perfectly in her work heels while entering the vast boardroom. She almost held her breath from seeing the band seated down, quickly noticing her designated seat being occupied by Tommy. Doc, Vince, and Nikki all sat to the left of Mr. Harrison, not seeing Sammi walk. Samm couldn’t help but give small glances to the blonde man when he wasn’t looking. Mick and Tommy smiled shortly at the young girl, Sammi flicking Tommy’s ear to make him move down a chair. They give each other a kiss on the cheek as Sammi sat down finally, her sight carried out across Nikki who looked almost asleep behind his dark sunglasses. She stayed clear of making eye contact with Vince, feeling the stare once again.

“Okay let's get this meeting on its way,” announced Mr. Harrison, sitting at the head of the table like always. “I’d first like to tell the boys congratulations on the album, even after the many many delays, people love it. You’ve managed to fix one thing,” said Mr. Harrison with firmly pressed lips, giving a cold stare to everyone. The silence could be cut with a knife, Doc already thinking of what to say to make things civil. “Because of the new album, you must now go on tour for promotion. Also because it is written on the contracts, and you must all still follow it,” ordered Mr. Harrison.

“I believe this would be great for the boys to hit the road again. They’ve had plenty of rest for a good long tour,” said Doc, nodded along, eyeing Sammi from across the table, writing everything down at lighting speed.

“I’m not so sure rest is the right word for their break of touring. I’m also not sure about a long tour for these men,” said Mr. Harrison. Sammi stopped writing for a moment, switching glances between her boss and the boys. Nikki would clear his throat every so often to drink water, while only Vince seemed to be paying attention. Their eyes catching each other for a split second before Sammi looked down at her notes. “We will only make North American dates ranging from the beginning of August to the third week of November, pretty easy for you rockstars,”

“Mr. Harrison with all due respect, I do believe these boys can do more than just North America. These men can go to Europe or Asia right after November,” said Doc. “The album has been doing great for the first week. You said it yourself,”

Mr. Harrison leaned back into the desk chair, crossing his arms as he glared right at Doc. “Doc. You really think Motley Crue can tour by themselves for more than four months without messing something up?” asked Mr. Harrison, only seeing Doc slowly retreat.

“They’ve had their moments, but yes. I do think we can just pick up after Thanksgiving,” uttered Doc.

“By moments you mean the multiple things that have been brought to my attention that raise concern. Tabloids with pictures of Nikki & Tommy intoxicated at almost every single day on my desk. The incident happening in one of the recording studios. A singer who has a bigger record than all my other talent. Do you know I’ve never had to deal with any of these things in my lifetime in this industry?”

Vince, Tommy, Mick, and even Nikki all turned their eyes on Sammi, Sammi looking only at her notes or boss. Sammi only gave the proper secretary to look for everyone to display. Mr. Harrison snapped his fingers, gaining the attention back to him from everyone. “Do not look at Samantha. She’s not your friend. She’s not your sister. She’s doing her job right now. You all pay attention to me. You are all lucky I’m even allowing a headlining tour. If you all don’t lose me money, I’ll allow a European extension at the beginning of the year,” said Mr. Harrison. Sammi stays quiet, looking back at Nikki having trouble keeping his head up. “We will go as I said starting in August. Any further questions or interruptions?”

“I have my court date the second week in September,” said Vince, speaking up for the first time. Everyone became silent again, switching glances between Harrison and Vince. Sammi gave a sympathetic look to Vince for once in a long time.

“We will make sure there is a week off in September for you to come back, Vince. Anything else?” asked Mr. Harrison.

“Everything will run smoothly, Mr. Harrison. I reassure you on that,” said Doc.

Mr. Harrison scuffs at Doc. “I’ll believe it when I see my money back in my wallet,” Mr. Harrison stood up from his seat, buttoning the middle of his blazer once again. “Samantha, there are documents in the back of that notebook. Please give it to Peterson in legal. Meeting dismissed,” ordered Mr. Harrison to Sammi as he left the boardroom. The weight in the room soon lifted, Doc dragging a hand down his face. Sammi relaxed her back, slumping in the office chair as she sighed loudly. Doc rose from his seat, reaching over Vince to smack Nikki in the head to wake him up. Nikki only groaned, resting his head in the palm of his hand.

“You all better listen to everything your boss just said,” said Doc, standing up to grab a bottle of water.

“Don’t worry I barely listen to everything my boss says,” muttered Sammi getting a chuckle from Tommy and Mick, Vince withholding a smile.

“Everything is gonna be fine,” slurred Nikki, yawning out loud. Sammi couldn’t help but keep an eye on Nikki from his demeanor.

“Yeah, I fucking doubt that,” mumbled Vince.

“Things would be fine if you all just acted like adults for once,” remarked Sammi, glaring at Nikki and Tommy who didn’t care.

“We got it covered. We can pretend to be responsible for a good while,” said Tommy, patting Sammi on the head.

“If only we had Sammi tour with us again to keep us in shape,” croaked Mick, readjusting his sunglasses. “We could really use you, little girl,”

“Yeah fuck that. I’d be unemployed and broke then be on a bus with my ex for a long time,” added Sammi, flipping her hair to one side. Everyone from Doc to Mick switched glances between Sammi and Vince, seeing Vince’s discomfort. Sammi raised an eyebrow at every, curling her lip. “What? Someone had to fucking say it. He’s here at my work bothering me,” grumbled Sammi, pointing a sharp finger at Vince. Vince shook his head, pulling on his earlobe.

“So you’re not even gonna say my name anymore?” barked Vince, crossing his arms. Sammi rolled her eyes, not caring if she looked rude to Vince. “I thought at least here you’d give me something, and not keep ignoring me,”

“My god you’re so dramatic,” Sammi mumbled under her breath. “Alright, here's something! Can you kindly shut the fuck up, Vince? Last time I checked I told you I wanted to be away from you,” bossed Sammi, staring coldly at Vince. Vince flared his nostrils, knocking his knuckles against the hard wooden table.

“Enough you two. Boys you’re free to go. I don’t want to hold Sammi from her job any further,” said Doc, grabbing his briefcase and stepping into the hallway. Vince was the first to jump out of his seat, not caring to say goodbye to anyone from his band. Mick squeezed Sammi’s shoulder before he left, showing his usual form of compassion. Tommy stood up, stretching out to feel his long spine crack seeing Nikki just stay quiet.

“Hey Sixxter, I’m gonna hit the restroom. Wait for me in the lobby,” said Tommy, getting a groan in response. “See you later Sammi,” Tommy kissed Sammi on the forehead before disappearing in the hallway. Sammi waved Tommy a goodbye, keeping her eyes on Nikki’s silence. She could hear him begin to lightly snore, making her finally walk over and take the empty seat right of him.

Sammi shook his shoulder roughly, hearing more groans in return. Nikki slowly turned his head to Sammi, staying hidden behind his dark sunglasses.

“What?” croaked Nikki, slumping in his seat and crossing his arms.

“What?” mimicked Sammi, raising an eyebrow to him. “What’s going on with you? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Everything’s-” Sammi interrupted Nikki, pushing his sunglasses above his head. Immediately Sammi could see something was entirely right. Nikki’s eyes looked dull and dark. Dark circles under his eyes as if he hadn’t slept in years, the whites of his eyes almost turning pink all around. Sammi frowned at Nikki, Nikki pushing her hand away to hide behind his glasses again.

“You’re not fine. Seriously Nikki what’s going on with you?” asked Sammi again, softened her expression with compassionate eyes.

“I haven’t been feeling the best lately,” uttered Nikki, taking his glasses off to rub his eyes. “I haven’t been able to sleep… for some reason,” lied Nikki. He knew exactly why he couldn’t sleep at night anymore. Unlike coke, heroin made him awake at all hours even when he didn’t shoot up after a while.

“How long have you been like this?” asked Sammi, putting her hand on top of Nikki’s. Nikki could help but feel a little ping in his chest from the small act of affection. Nikki knew he had to make up a lie fast to not lose the small affection he likes from Sammi.

“Going on a week? That’s why I left last night. I didn’t want to wake you up by accident especially when you have work,” said Nikki, shooting a lopsided grin to Sammi. Nikki silently prayed Sammi bought his lie, lying to himself it was going to be the last lie. Sammi pursed her lips, looking between Nikki and the desk for some room to think.

“Alright, I guess that makes sense,” cautioned Sammi. “Thanks for leaving a note by the way. The princess appreciates it,” smiled happily Sammi, making Nikki’s frown turn upside down for a moment. Nikki lightly snaked his hand behind Sammi’s neck, pulling her in for a surprise kiss. Sammi’s eyes went wide, pushing Nikki away to look back at the open door. “You really like to get to the edge of getting caught don’t you?” smirked Sammi.

Nikki smirked at Sammi, “Admit it. It’s pretty fun. Especially when you’re looking sexy in this outfit,” Nikki’s hand crept up Sammi’s thigh, bringing her chair closer to him with his foot. Sammi’s heart began to race, feeling Nikki’s hand feature between her legs. She gripped his wrist tight, stopping Nikki from any further moves. Sammi looked deep into his eyes, trying her hardest to resist kissing away the smirk on Nikki’s lips.

“I’m at work. And you should get some sleep,” said Sammi, pushing herself away from Nikki. Nikki shrugged his shoulders, putting on his glasses as he rose from the seat. “Oh, I’m gonna go out with some guys tonight. Don’t be surprised if I come knocking on your door. Maybe then I’ll sleep,” said Nikki, kissing Sammi on the cheek. Sammi shook her head, smiling slightly to herself, looking over her shoulder to Nikki leaving. Sammi fell back against the chair, huffing loudly. She could feel the nerves in her body calm down, noticing her palms were becoming sweaty. Being in complete silence made her process the sight of Vince, being right in front of her. Was she being too hard on him? Should she talk to Vince finally after months of this? The questions that always played in Sammi’s head, played louder than ever today. Sammi only took a deep breath in and stood up to be a grown-up like she’s supposed to be.

July 5, 1985

“Sammi, I don’t think I can keep lying to Athena,” said Emma, pouring three glasses of white wine from Sammi’s collection. Sabrina and Sammi each placed a bowl of food on the small glass dining table, sitting down for their Friday dinners together. Sammi took a sip of her wine before even thinking of what to say in this conversation. “I get it. I’m your best friend, but Athena is also my girlfriend,” pleaded Emma, serving herself a portion of cold pasta salad.

“What is she even asking you, Em? I doubt Sammi’s making it obvious,” said Sabrina, grabbing a piece of chicken with her salad.

“I know she’s not, but Athena can’t help but keep her nose out of Sammi’s life. Almost every single time I say we went out, she asks if you got with someone,” shared Emma, eating with a touch of annoyance.

“Well tell her to stay out of it. I already told Athena I didn’t want her or Tommy anywhere near my love life,” spat Sammi.

“It’s a love life between you and Nikki?” asked Sabrina, smirking at Sammi with a quizzical expression. Sammi shot a glare at Sabrina, making her giggle amongst herself. “Maybe you have to remind your sister again, Sam. Say it isn’t nice to be badgering her girlfriend because you two are friends,”

“I’m glad we keep you around. You solve all our problems at record speed,” joked Emma, raising her glass to cheer with Sabrina. Sabrina gladly clanked her wine glass with Emma’s, Sammi playfully shaking her head. “I second this reminder. You’d also be helping out me and yourself,”

“I would love to, but Athena never learned to listen if you haven’t already figured it out,” mumbled Sammi, drinking the chilled wine.

“That’s probably the one thing I don’t like about her, but in this case, it comes from a place of love. Please still try though,” told Emma to Sammi, giving her a lopsided grin.

“What really is the worst thing if at least Athena knew about Nikki and you?” asked Sabrina.

“Athena would tell Tommy, Tommy would tell Vince, and Vince would yell at my ass. And a mad Vince is the last thing I want in my life,” informed Sammi, refilling for a second glass of wine.

“You really care what Vince thinks or you just don’t want to deal with his shit?” added Emma, scrunching her eyebrows at Sammi. Sammi thought about it for a moment, not knowing if she just never wanted to hear from Vince ever again.

“It’s more of I’ve been a bitch to him for 6 months, so I don’t want him to think I’m two-faced. Because I know his mind will run wild like it always has with Nikki,” admitted Sammi, shrugging her shoulders.

“You can’t be two-faced if all you did was have sex when you were single. You chose Vince and he fucked up. He still needs to know that and be reminded from time to time. Like at the meeting,” said Sabrina.

“The one moment I wished I worked at that fucking office,” utter Emma, gulping her last bit of wine. “Since we are on the topic of Vince, have you ever thought about talking to him? You don’t think you deserve some answers?”

“I have but I don’t know how to talk to him without sounding like a bitch anymore. It’s almost as if he made me get an attitude and Nikki made it worse,” pondered Sammi, pushing the last of her around with a fork.

“Like that poor poor Jessica girl you read to filth?” joked Emma, giggling louder at Sammi scowl to her. Emma shrugged her shoulder with a playful smile.

“Maybe you could write down everything you want to know? It could help you keep your thoughts in order instead of going off from your emotions,” suggested Sabrina, wiping the corner of her mouth as she finished her food.

“Emma’s right, you do solve our problems at record speed,” answered Sammi with a soft smile. “I guess that would be a good starting point, and talk before he leaves again… But it’s so nice being mean to him!” whined Sammi, pouting at Sabrina like a little girl. Sabrina shot a look at Sammi that made her quit the pouting and straight her shoulders, almost like a mother. “Fine, I’ll try my hardest to be civil and demand answers with kindness,”

“Atta girl,” encouraged Sabrina, lightly punching Sammi's shoulder. “It could bring you some great closure,”

Sammi smiled to herself, beginning to clear out the dining table with Emma’s help. “Or maybe it’ll just make me sadder than ever,” shouted Sammi, dropping the dirty dishes in the sink to wash later as she drank her wine.

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