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#also also my tags are always insane and ranting and long

noctomania · 1 year

Text

Somewhere recently I got a lot of followers so just wanted to check in to make some things clear about where I stand on some things:

This is a space i keep open bc i like to share information about myself or knowledge in general bc knowledge is power and i want to empower you. This does not give you permission to be weird in the sense of invading my inbox with sexually forward stuff. Luckily has only happened a couple of times so I don't anticipate it but just as a preventative bc I don't like having to block anyone so something like that but I don't have a 3 strike rule for that it's a one and done.

I am very open tho about many topics including but not limited to sex bc I think the more repressed topics need to be talked about so we can find healthier places to exist bc where many people are at, at least in my country, it ain't healthy. What I post/repost isn't always about me. Just keep that in mind that you shouldn't assume anything about me unless I say it. If you chose to follow me you do so at your own discretion. While most sexual stuff i talk about is usually in an educational/informational vein, and I don't tend to make dirty jokes, I like to have the freedom to. So just be aware there can be mature material here so you follow at your own risk.

We do not condone any bigotry and to be clear here are some examples ( disclaimer for all these btw history matters, who holds the power matters, it isn't just about feelins):

Terfs/transphobia

Racism

Ace phobia (if unclear i am open for questions! I will not bite!)

Homophobia, ace phobia, or any bigotry towards one's sexual identity bc IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU

Xenophobia

Sexism

Bigotry towards unhoused or impoverished folks

Ableism

Antisemitism

Bigotry towards neurodivergent

Bigotry towards sex workers/sex work

And while ime sure I missed some i think you get the idea and if you don't anyone is welcome to message me! I'm happy to discuss anything so long as there is mutual respect. You're allowed to tell me if i go overboard just like i can to you bc we're both capable of flaw a d mistakes as well as learning and teaching and growth!

So that being said i know who I am and what i know about and I want to share that in what i consider to be a market of life experiences here on tumblr. I may not have many but i love to learn and if I can be some kinda buoy for anyone else out there I'm happy to be of service! If you just want to be another shadow that's fine too there are hundreds just like ya so you fit right in.

In any case welcome if you feel it, if ya don't then

Wishing you happy trails and may you find your way.

Ps: i post a lot of food bc i like food

#i JUST discovered that ryping hapoy trails into the gif finder brings up a TON of cats the musical gifs and I'm fucked up now #is there a cats the musical niche on here i didn't know about bc i have repressed my adoration out of shame and guilt?#btw we talk a lot about mental health here so get used to it #also also my tags are always insane and ranting and long #i do not apologize #i was doing this before the uodated that started showing the tags in the notes so I'm digging my heels in.#gif

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maochira · 1 year

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i rlly love ur headcanons and i have a request for you :D

since you’ve done a headcanon about noa, chris and lavinho finding out their child dating kaiser, how about the blue lock boys (isagi, chigiri, rin and ness) finding out that their sibling is dating kaiser?

maybe they walked in on kaiser and us kissing and that’s how they found out that we’re dating kaiser ( ・∇・)

it would be rlly funny to see isagi’s reaction to us dating kaiser (he’s probably gonna have a crisis or sth)

YEAHH A REQUEST INCLUDING ISAGI!!! My first time writing for him!! Requests are open!

Also thank you very much! Always makes me happy to hear when people tell me they enjoy my headcanons!

Masterlist

Current writing event

Tags: gn!sibling!reader, no idea how this would fit into the canon because why where how do the characters meet but I don't care I get requests I write silly headcanons, reader dates Kaiser, overprotective Isagi and Rin

Yoichi Isagi

-feels like he's going insane when he sees you and Kaiser kiss

-he starts yelling at Kaiser to stay away from his sibling and what the fuck would need to get into his head to kiss you right in front of him

-Kaiser is pretty unbothered by Isagi's reaction and even starts laughing about it

-you try to calm Isagi down, but he literally won't. He starts listing reasons why there are so many people who he'd prefer you dating over Kaiser

-Isagi has so many unorganized thoughts running through his head, he ends up blurting out "But he's German?!" (A/N this is funny because I'm German)

-when Isagi realizes his reaction upset you, he kind of calms down and apologizes, although in his head he's still freaking out

Hyoma Chigiri

-honestly, I think he'd be pretty chill about it

-he'd probably make some joking comment when he sees you and Kaiser kiss

-but secretly he's kind of conflicted about it. Like??? He wants you to be happy and he's glad you got someone you love and who loves you but. Knowing what kind of person Kaiser is (I like to imagine Isagi has sent him multiple rant text messages about Kaiser) Chigiri can't help but feel a little worried about you

-as long as Kaiser is around, Chigiri stays calm and lighthearted, but when he's alone with you he'll ask you a ton of questions about how you got together with him

Rin Itoshi

-he sees you and Kaiser kiss and. He's totally NOT okay with that

-Rin is very overprotective of you in general so no matter who your partner would be, he'd be strictly against it at first. He would need a few weeks or even months to adjust to the thought of you dating someone. But knowing you date Kaiser? He'll need a lot more time to be okay with that. Well, in case he ever gets used to that.

-will literally grab your arm and pull you away from Kaiser

-Kaiser grabs your other arm and now you're between your beloved brother and your boyfriend who you love very much. They start yelling at each other until you yell at them to stop

-Rin sighs frustrated and says he'll let you two be if it makes you happy, but he also gives a death stare to Kaiser

Alexis Ness pre-Neo Egoist League

-when he sees you and Kaiser kiss, at first he can't believe it's real

-but honestly, he's a bundle of joy when you tell him you and Kaiser are dating

-like, he'll think it's super cute and he adores seeing you with Kaiser

-he would literally organize dates for the two of you

-I think he'd just be super supportive of you in general, and knowing you and Kaiser are in love very much warms his heart

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fillinforlater · 1 year

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FEAR----

Male Reader x Huh Yunjin (ft. Chaewon)

Length: 2420 words

Tags: con-non-con kink, change in pov, piss kink, water sports, public sex, choking, gagging, a kinky robbery, humiliation, crying, name calling, missionary, messy make-out, all the bodily fluids, roleplay, dacryphilia maybe, misattribution-of-arousal-kink!Yunjin

TW: cnc kink, water sports (pee), (role)playing with fear

Inspiration: ffs, I have no clue why my brain comes up with these. Maybe I'm just insane? Or stupid? Or too horny for my own good?

(A/N: yeah, I think I will have to take a break after this. Something very different will come up next, but I still need time to write it lol, so please be patient. For those that love these kinks, you're welcome, I won't write them (especially water sports) often.)

"What are you thinking about right now?"

Chaewon’s quiet, tender whisper is calming like a cool breeze in blazing summer heat. It takes you out of your short trance, which you spent gazing at the ring on her finger. You look into her concerned eyes, then towards her blonde friend at the bar. A heavy sigh leaves your lips as you set down the untouched cocktail.

"You know I like the idea," you start your rant, hoping it removes the uncertainty burdening your heart, "and I know you're completely fine with it. But the more I look at her—I just don't know if she knows what she really wants. You get me?"

"I think I do. Hmm,” Chaewon ponders for a second, caressing your palm, "Look, how about we ask her right now."

She turns around and with a wave of her hand she gets her friend's attention. The young woman quickly walks over, a bright, beautiful smile on her features. She stops next to your wife and straightens her postures when she looks at you. Before she can greet you, Chaewon whispers a long message into her ear. It makes her face sweaty and redder with each word.

"So," Chaewon loudly announces at the end of her explanation,"what are you thinking, Yunjin."

"I—"

Yunjin locks eyes with you. Her hands fidget, her upper body tenses up and her breath responds to her increased heartbeat. You can almost see the small muscle in her chest throb. She hesitates, even with Chaewon's reassuring smile and strokes on her back. Before you can speak up however, Yunjin's firm answer catches you by surprise:

"I still want it. I don't know what else to say, but I really want this and I don't care about the dangers."

"Alright," you respond blankly, though slightly in awe of Yunjin's clarity, "I appreciate your trust."

It's way past midnight when Yunjin leaves the area around the well-lit HYBE building to walk home. Dark, narrow corridors in between cold, lifeless concrete buildings are her choice, as she is eager to get to her flat quickly. Yunjin will always sacrifice a bit of lighting for effective short cuts. With her cell phone as a flashlight in one hand, her Louis Vuitton bag in the other, she confidently finds her way in this now well-known maze.

At night, she doesn't have to be extra careful about someone noticing her or the song she hums. An unreleased track, self-composed, with lyrics that have meaning to her and the other bandmates. At night, Yunjin is free to sing those words and feel a bit of burden fall from her shoulders.

A gentle breeze makes her blonde hair sway off of her shoulder and the loose jacket flies along with it. Yunjin has to stop in her tracks to adjust the leather garment. It's this time of the year where it's warm enough at night that you don't really need any extra clothes. However, each cold wind reminds Yunjin that it's good to have something on her. She can't allow herself to get sick.

It's also the time of the year where almost every night sky is littered with dazzling stars that dance on their designated spot, billions of miles away. It's a spectacle, each and every single one of them, so similar yet so different. The human eye cannot escape from this beauty, and Yunjin is no different. She stands there, star struck, the white lights dancing on her irises like it’s the parquet of a musical. Yunjin hums the melody to their performance.

The bushes behind her rustle once. A dark figure shots out from behind them like a lightning bolt. Yunjin gasps and quickly looks behind her shoulder to see a black ski mask right in her face. Her ensuing scream is muted by a cloth forced into her mouth. She tries to escape, but the person is just too fast. Yunjin is grabbed at the top of her dress and forcefully shoved into a nearby wall.

“Money?” the figure asks in a cold, rough tone. Yunjin tenses up when she feels freezing metal run up her exposed thigh. Her eyes tremble in fear, even more so her legs. She is only held upright by the man's hand and his leg trapping her in between dead concrete and death personified.

The man tears on Yunjin’s dress and groans angrily. Yunjin is too scared to test his patience, so she shakes her head. Her lips lose all their moisture to the cloth in her mouth, but maybe it’s just traveling to her eyes, to her sweat glands and down low.

“Not even in that bag? Not even at home?” the man continues to ask. He guides the metal object further up, right to Yunjin’s core. A few swipes on her bundle of nerves make the young woman burst out into tears. It’s certainly not a knife that he is holding. The death bringing object right on her most private part makes her flinch, head shaking rapidly.

The man grabs her face roughly. It’s like a slap he stopped as soon as he felt her skin. It reassures that the cloth won’t fall out of her mouth. The man groans once again. With small kicks against her shoes he forces Yunjin’s feet further apart. He then leans in right next to her ear.

“I know that you know what this is,” he whispers and presses his gun against Yunjin’s pussy, she wails, “and if you don’t tell me where the fuck I can get my money—tell me, or else.”

The flow of Yunjin’s tears is like an endless waterfall. Her hands are pleaing, begging, showing that she has nothing. No possession at hand, no money, maybe the bag is worth something, but the man does not seem interested in that. He wraps one hand around her gentle, fragile throat and slowly pulls out the gun from underneath her dress. She can look right into the barrel. There is a bullet waiting at the back, her name on it.

This is it. Everything inside her is building up to this moment. Her body reacts the only way it can, the only way it knows how to, the only way she wants to. Instead of the bullet hitting her, the man shoves his knee in between her legs and pushes up. Yunjin screams against the gag, her fingers dig into her attackers back as she starts to pee violently. The clear stream immediately soaks her thin white panties, then runs down her pale, goosebump covered legs and begins to soak her shoes and his pants. The dark spot seems invisible on his dark pants, but he definitely feels and hears Yunjin’s eruption.

“Bitch, what the—how dare you!”

The man pulls out his knee and closely watches as the last sprays of Yunjin’s pee cover the dry asphalt below. He doesn’t even notice the gag falling out of Yunjin’s mouth as she makes no attempts to scream for help. She feels like all her dignity is stripped from her and sobs uncontrollably. Snot and salt water with small hints of make-up mess up her beautiful face, but she doesn’t cover it up. She still holds on to the back of this cruel stranger.

“Bitch, you are crazy.”

“Pl-please d-don’t ki-kill me.”

“Shut up,” he snarls and presses his gun against her panties again, “slowly take them off, or else..”

Yunjin’s throat is dry. Her sobs begin to sound like croaks as she leans down and grabs the wet lingerie. In the most embarrassing performance of her lifetime, she drags down her panties, feeling her own clear, barely gold liquid on her skin. She steps out with one leg, then the other, and both times the man kneads her thighs for a short time. Another breeze flies through her hair, but this time she only notices it because of the freezing touch on her wet core.

“Wring it out. With one hand, right onto the street.”

Yunjin closes her eyes as she closes her fist around her panties. They worked like a sponge and now all of her piss shoots out of the gaps in her hand. She is mortified by how the warm liquid feels on her hand.

“Fuck, you’re insane,” the man says with awe and amusement and grabs Yunjin’s hair. He yanks her across the street, into the bushes where he came from. Behind them is a small patch of grass, where Yunjin is forced to lay down and spread her legs. She whimpers ‘no, no’ repeatedly, but the threat of the gun is right there, in his hand. Now it’s next to her head as he opens his zipper.

“Pl-please don’t,” she whispers and her fist forms tighter. It draws even more pee from her panties.

“What’s your name?” the man coldly responds, fishing out his hard cock.

“Yunjin.”

“Do you want to die, Yunjin.”

“No, please, no!”

“Then shut up—and do it again.”

Yunjin has no idea what he meant by this last statement. However, when he shoves his entire, surprisingly large cock inside her hot cunt, she doesn’t even remember it anymore. To pee in front of a stranger was pure horror, but this takes it to another level. If it weren’t for his hand on her mouth, not even the fear of death would have stopped her from screaming at this feeling. Pain, pain that feels great, fantastic, orgasmic even. Yunjin’s head begins to spin and her eyes roll into the back of her head.

“Hng, fuck,” the man groans and leans down to Yunjin’s face, “Yunjin, you’re fucking pretty. Great to have met you.”

A sinister laugh as he begins to bite the skin on her cheek and then on her shoulder. It’s not enough to leave marks, but definitely enough for Yunjin to feel something other than the cock hammering her pussy. It’s enormous size and width stretch her out more than any of her toys did before. Her flailing legs begin to go numb.

Suddenly, the man pushes his lip-sealing fingers into her mouth. He plays with her tongue, while hitting just the right spot inside her over and over. As she yelps, Yunjin comes to a shocking realization. The water on her face is not just tears, but also drools from the heavy pounding. Her mind becomes blank every now and then. It feels insane, better than anything she tried before. Something is building up in her lower regions and this filthy criminal gets her filthy pussy closer to another release.

“Do it again, Yunjin,” he huffs into her face while retrieving his fingers from her mouth again— “I know you’re a kinky slut. Do it, or else.” —and wraps them around her delicate throat. Simultaneously, he begins to make out with her drooling mouth and press down on her throat. Yunjin screams into his mouth. Her body has given up. It’s completely resigned to him, but her mind is tormented by the inevitable.

He hits the right spot, and her bladder is still so full. No, she can’t let it happen. She’d rather die and drown in her own spit and snot. It’s so humiliating, so bad, but at the same, her dopamine level has never been this high, it’s good. It will happen, it will happen, he just needs to tip her over, please tip me over.

“Or else. Now.”

The moment he stops fucking her tight cunt, Yunjin starts to piss again. A violent, clear stream erupts from her and she waters the grass and bushes around her like a gardening hose. Her hips buckle up, but she doesn’t feel his manhood anymore. She opens her teary eyes and sees the man's cockhead above her abdomen, unloading his warm, sticky semen all over the dress.

Gooey white and runny light-yellow still shoot out of their bodies, but the two are entangled in a sloppy kiss with no care for the mess they are making on each other and the grass below. This might be someone’s property and they will surely notice. Not that Yunjin really cares, as her tongue is thoroughly sucked on and her limbs feel numb from the pleasure filled violation.

Suddenly, he reaches for the pee-soaked panties in her firm grasp. He guides her pale legs together and forces the undergarment up to her still twitching pussy. Yunjin gasps at the sensation of stained, wet clothing forced upon her. She loves how he continues to rub his thumb on her now covered clit and stares at her face, stupid from his attack.

“Kinky slut. Now fuck off. No cleaning until your home. Or else.”

Quiet. Not a single sound. You’re able to close the door behind you without it creaking. Your wife will probably be asleep by now, but you want to make sure it stays that way. Carefully remove your shoes and sneak over the smooth tiles into the living room. Absolute silence. She is not here. Search in the kitchen, just a light humming of the refrigerator. There is no sound a human would make, until you reach the stairs.

Wet squelching and soft moans. They get louder with every step you take upwards. You decide to leave the mask on and move faster, still careful to not stir up attention. The sounds of self-satisfaction come from the playroom. Take a look inside and there she is.

Chaewon sits on the couch, panties around her ankles. Three of her fingers slowly move in and out of her pussy as she rubs her clit in circles. She throws her head back against the rest and the moonlight gives you a perfect view of her pleasure ridden face and closed eyes. The squelching gets louder and in between moans, Chaewon forms a clear sentence.

“Yes, fuck her like that. Don’t stop, don’t stop—”

Three quick steps and you’re right in front of the half-naked Chaewon. She pulls her fingers out in shock but you replace the emptiness of her hole with yours immediately after. Chaewon gasps as you lean closer to her and pump slowly.

“My wife is a kinky bitch.”

“Sh-shut up.”

“No, you shut up. Keep imagining it.

How I fuck your friend as she cries and screams. The way her body trembles while you look from the bushes. The way my cock pierces her pussy until she starts to pee all over herself.”

“Fuck!” Chaewon screams out and her body begins to shake.

“You like that? Then cum for me, Chaewon.

Or else.”

#kpop smut #male reader insert #girl group smut #female idol smut #le sserafim smut #yunjin smut #huh yunjin smut #male reader #male reader smut #lesserafim smut #le sserafim yunjin smut

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dreaming-of-lu · 1 year

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Hello!

I really liked one of your works, where First overheard reader talking to themselves and I was wondering if you could make a continuation for it. Thank you:)

A/N: Hiya! Glad to know you liked it! Hope you enjoy this! also a tag to @my-insanity-is-an-artform , come get yer tall glass of water!

First made you feel so many things at once. A truly, kind gentleman that others dreamed of in a significant other. Daring, dashing, a warrior and all. Enough to make anyone tongue-tied, staring up at him with wide eyes as he towered over them. His etiquette made the village girls giggle behind their hands.

First was the textbook definition of what a true hero was. Though, there were some downsides to this. Sometimes, the man was clueless in not understanding that he came off more than he thought. His charisma was a death sentence, a blessing, and a pain, all tied together in a pretty bow.

"He's not good for me, for my health," you muttered, "seriously, him and his blue puppy eyes, what am I thinking?"

You glared into the champagne glass while taking small glances at First, standing beautifully in the middle of a circle of women and men. The lights on the chandelier made him ethereal, drawing your gaze back at him; no matter how much you forced yourself to look away, he always seemed to drag them back onto him.

First was beautiful, there's no denying that; pale blonde wind-swept bangs that begged for your hands to play with, pale eyelashes over icy blues that were powerful and intense with a glance but were so soft whenever they landed on you. Wait, he was looking at you.

"You might wanna go save our dear friend from their clutches," a voice piped up beside you. It sounded distant to your ears cause all you could see was those blues drawing you into its sea.

First gives a shy smile before one of the women in the circle grabs onto his arm, drawing his attention away. A strong emotion came forth, deep from within,

"Hold my glass real quick; I'll be right back," shoving the glass into their hands without looking back as you walked into the circle, gently grabbing First hand.

"First," why did you sound breathless? His eyes went to you, silent appreciation in his eyes that made your skin tingle and your heart pound stronger than ever before. Swallowing thickly, you turned to the circle, silently cheering in your head as they looked at you with vague disgust and upset at your sudden appearance.

'He's not a fucking toy.' You thought bitterly.

"Apologies to you, ladies and gentlemen, but there is something that requires Sir Link's attention at this instant."

Turning on your heel with First hand in yours, you lead him away from the vulture's sight.

"Dear," it sounded so distant with how hard your heart was pounding and the blood rushing through your ears.

'How dare they? Treat him as if he's a trophy, a toy for them to play. Only wanting him for his looks and not understanding the sacrifices he had to make. Damnit, First, you and your smoochable face.'

A rough palm with such gentleness roused you from your ranting thoughts. Worried blues stared into you, peeling back every anger, concern, disgust, and jealousy spinning on its axis to an abrupt halt.

"What about my smoochable face?"

What?

"Huh?" You blinked as the proud, tall-standing hero shrunk underneath your gaze, reducing into a flustered mess, rubbing the back of his neck and averting your eyesight.

"My apologies, you said my smoochable face, and I-"

"And you what," your voice breathily shrill. The quietness is loud that the sound of a needle could be heard dropping onto the ground.

"I- um, may or may not have," First clears his throat, inhaling deeply, "overheard you from before when you were ranting about me and my face."

First grimaced at the sight of your face.

Oh.

Oh, this was seriously going to be a long conversation.

#linked universe x reader #linkeduniverse x reader #lu first x reader #.bea's writing #first hero x reader #hylia's chosen hero #link x reader #linked universe #woooww i finally got out my writers block #had no idea where i was going with this #but it's done #ending may be a bit nyeh

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v-era-18 · 8 months

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Red Licorice

Chapter Three: A Dead Girls Diary

“We don’t need them. It’ll be me and you against the world,” -Casey Beker

June 14th 1996

I know I'm supposed to start out with Dear Diary, but that's for basic bitches as Tatum would say-that dumb redhead.

Today my mother gifted me with another diary to write down my feelings after my break up with basketball player Paul Mathews. We had been dating for over a year, had gone on several dates, I cheered at all his games and wore his jersey blah blah-. She thinks I took it hard but in reality, I was more appalled with the reason why for the breakup. From what Pual’s sister had confessed, it was because he didn't like me at all-and was using me to get to my best friend (Y/n) (L/n).

(Y/n) is my best friend, I love her so much! Not only is she super smart but she's insanely pretty too. The only problem is she never believes it whenever someone tells her how beautiful she is. Hence why I wasn't hurt with the fact that Paul fell for (Y/n)-I understood why. She's like a beacon of light that you want to be covered in each day, from the way she laughs with a wide smile to the way she enters the room warming the space around her.

Long story short, many guys have come up to me and asked me how to ask her out before, and you know what I did as a good friend? I told them to get lost and they could kiss my ass! All of the boys at our school are practically dogs, (Y/n) needs a boyfriend that actually cares and likes the things she's interested in.

Take Randy for instance, he would be a perfect match-

(The rest of the sentence was crossed out)

On second thought, she doesn't need any man but me.

June 17th 1996

Okay Diary, I know it's been a minute since i've updated you on what's going on, but long story short-Tatum has lost her damn mind! Not only did she decide to sleep with my ex boyfriend Paul but there's a rumor amongst the other cheerleaders that they had been sleeping with each other for awhile behind my back! The absolute nerve!

(Y/n) told me I should let it go and possibly find another boyfriend who really cares about me the way I should be treated. She even went out of her way to watch a marathon of Rom-com videos with me to cheer me up. Not only did she cook me my favorite chocolate cake but she also made sure we did our nails. She even let me put color to hers-although she wouldn't let me do pink, but I didn't mind.

I am a bit jealous that Stu and Billy have been trying to get her to watch horror movies with them alone. I find it really weird how the two of them since we've been kids have always insisted that it has to be the three of them to enjoy the movies. But the jokes on them! (Y/n) has been spending all her time with me, Sidney and that bitch of a redhead.

Who needs boys when you have girls instead.

OMG I just got the greatest idea on how to get back at Tatum!

I'll keep you in the loop with my devilish diary!

Xoxox,

Casey

June 27th 1996

You'll never believe what happened today! My plan to get back at Tatum worked! Well not actually but indirectly.

You see Tatum has a huge crush on Stu Matcher, the dumb trouble maker (Y/n) always watches horror movies with. The bright side is that he's hot and is known for making all the girls melt in our school. I honestly didn't get what Tatum sees in him-but it must be something since she keeps ranting and raving about it during our sleep overs.

(Y/n), Sidney and Tatum came with me to the mall to do a little shopping, and Stu and Billy just so happened to be there looking for god knows what. They simply insisted on tagging along and the whore was more than happy to give in. It seemed to make (Y/n) uncomfortable with how much Tatum was flirting with Stu-I put it together that she simply hates public displays of affection. That's how it was when Paul was around.

Eventually Sidney and Tatum decided to head off in the lingerie store and decided to drag (Y/n) with them-knowing that my friend hates men seeing her in there. I was about to take along and make suggestions when Stu stopped me, the boy was straightforward with flirting-and I hated how easy it was for me to fall for his sly smooth words. I would be mush if I honestly found him perfect, but the amount of times he's followed (Y/n) around like a lost puppy freshman year screamed otherwise. So I played the game-remembering I had a score to settle with Tatum, and soon enough we were in the public restroom getting busy.

I won't lie-he was good. No wonder he broke so many hearts and had ex’s demand to get back together with him.

It wasn't long after the mall that he asked me on a date-a bit backwards don't you think? I guess I was a very good lay for him-my efforts paid off though, he only paid attention to me in spite of Tatums efforts.

During the whole time, (Y/n) did not speak to me, I could tell something was wrong due to her forced smiles and lack of conversation. Especially when Billy mentioned the new horror movie coming to theaters that he and Stu wanted to go see with her. I even asked to join, but she acted docile during the whole conversation.

I felt as though I made a deep mistake of some kind. And it really bothers me.

July 2nd 1996

I fucked up. Really bad.

(Y/n) has been avoiding me, and each time I invite her over my house she always says she has to help her Aunt out with something-which is bullshit because her aunt works her ass off at the hospital 24/7.

I have been spending a lot of time with Stu lately, but we either are having sex or he wants to watch horror movies. Sometimes I simply just stare at the scream lost in thought as to why I wanted to continue this relationship. I mean the sex is good, don't get me wrong and it feels like a victory to continue tormenting Tatum with our relationship, but it didn't feel right to keep doing this if my best friend isn't around.

I told Stu about my concerns with (Y/n) only for him to ask if he should talk to her about it, it was the way that he asked that quickly threw me off. I then proceed to ask about their friendship and how they often hang out with each other. He tells me they haven't interacted as of late because of me, and asked me to ‘politely’ stop getting in the way of their movie time together.

We had a huge fight about it. I didn't like the way he said it so casually that he wanted her there with him rather than me. We ended up having sex an hour later-but it didn't feel right. It was odd, Stu seemed to be hate fucking me one minute then caressing and telling me how sorry he was.

Once he was done he looked at me for a long moment, it was like he was trying to see me as someone else-I had seen that look before with other boys who loved someone else. Whatever spell he was under he snapped out of it before kicking me out before his parents got home.

I’m so lost.

July 4th 1996

(the page was torn out with leftover teardrops)

July 7th 1996

Me and (Y/n) had a heart to heart. It was jealousy - something that we both never in terms felt within our friendship. I know her, she’s not the type to get jealous unless she truly liked or felt for the person she was looking at. And even then-there wasn’t many that she looked at-from my knowledge anyway.

We spent the rest of the afternoon together watching movies on her living room couch. It felt good to be in each other's good graces again, afterall my life just seemed out of place without her in it. Watching horror movies, going shopping, or simply walking in the town square didn't do it for me without her by my side. There was one part in the movie where I watched her laugh the hardest she's ever done, her smile warmed me up inside, my heart hammering miles per minute.

When it came time for my mom to arrive, I didn't want to leave. I wanted to stay. To hear her laughs and have her stay in my embrace longer. The bed in my home feels colder-missing the warmth on the other side of the mattress.

July 13th 1996

I'm scared to share this, but I've been rewinding last night's dream in my mind for the past three hours straight. It was nice at first, it seemed like every other day, I was over (Y/n)’s house horror movie in the background with the air blaring to life. The one thing that seemed weird was how close we were, she was laying on my chest covered in a blanket as I played with her curls.

It was comfortable, until (Y/n) leaned up and kissed me, not a quick peck but a slow passionate one. It wasn’t like the many empty ones I had given in my past relationships, it meant something. I could feel it-the love the joy my best friend was giving me. What shocked me the most was the fact I was kissing back taking the lead-dominating her entire being as I watched her melt in my grasp.

Soon I was on top of her kissing down her neck, stripping her of her clothes and sucking her breasts. I enjoyed it, the sight and the sounds she was making pleased me. It was different taking control but from how I was acting it was as if I had known how to do this my whole life.

I’ll never forget the way she moaned my name as I gave her orgasm after orgasm on the couch-her cunt practically dripping wet with her own thighs coated in her mess. Her eyebrows pulled together in ecstasy with her brown circles of breast on full display-arching into the air. It wasn’t long before we both finished, the aftercare was something I noticed I prioritized. I made sure she took a shower and was fed before taking her to the room to sleep.

It just felt right. No guilt. No thoughts about boys and their rough nature. Just the two of us. One embracing the other.

July 20th 1996

Distractions are what I found myself needing each night, and lucky enough for me there were plenty in Woodsburror. But with the many times I ended up underneath Stu I couldn't get her out of my head. Her moans and sweet utterance of my name against my lips, the same lips I found myself sucking the dick of the same man who had a secret attraction for my friend.

I know right-when did that happen.

It was the other night when I was with Stu in his truck, I had a slip of the lips and moaned (Y/n)’s name. I really hadn't meant to, but the way Matcher had stopped everything was telling enough-he didn't like the fact it was her name I had said. He had stopped initiating sex with me that night-even though he was still on hard.

I asked him if he was going to tell anyone what had happened. He said no, and instead offered a proposition. At first I was a bit scared to know what it was, but thought I didn’t have much of an option-I didn’t want my secret getting out.

He wanted a threesome between (Y/n) and Me. I immediately looked at him in a mix of shock and utter disgust. To get out of it I immediately mentioned that she was a virgin still-he countered it saying that he would be her first. The way he said it was weirdly full of warmth and affection. It twisted my stomach into knots and made me question how authentic was the relationship we currently had. The way he said her name-from the way he promised not to use her-to be gentle all the way through.

I hated it. I hated him. I never wanted to get out of a truck so fast in my entire life.

To get out of the conversation I lied and said I would think about it. But obviously-I'm thinking of a way to end this.

He wasn't going to touch (Y/n). Not on my watch.

July 27th 1996

Cheating isn't something to be glorified, ever. But damn did it feel like a weight off my shoulders when I heard of Tatums whore ways.

The new rumor amongst the cheerleaders this week was hot! Half the squad was over Autumn’s house when the ball was dropped about what the team captain had seen the other day on her way to Blockbuster. Apparently Tatum had invited Sidney and (Y/n) along on their blockbuster run knowing that Stu and Billy would be there. At first I was a bit upset (Y/n) hadn't told me anything about it-but the gears started turning once Autumn said Stu had ignored Tatum the entire time, his attention solely on my best friend.

It was confirmed with a simple sighting and interaction with the two, Stu didn't want me or Tatum. He wanted (Y/n). And in his own twisted way of trying to get close to her he was using us (her friends) as a gateway.

I don't understand. He had more opportunities to date her from the beginning, they were practically inseparable since they were kids-especially in middle school. Billy soon added to the mix not so long after his mother wasn't as present anymore.

You're probably wondering where the cheating part had taken place right? Long story short, our team captain-Abigail- had saw Stu fucking Tatum against the wall of an alleyway next to the store. It was embarrassing, not only did everyone give me sympathetic looks, but they all knew about what Paul did. It was the same thing happening twice in the row-(Y/n) being tossed in the mix.

I played the part of the sad grieving girlfriend very well, maybe it was because through the irony of it all- I didn't care about the fact the boys didn't want me. I cared about the fact they wanted (Y/n). They wanted my best friend-the girl I wanted all to myself.

I don't blame them for falling in love with her though, after all. I did it myself.

August 1st 1996

Today was cheerleading practice for the new school year along the day football players start preparation for the upcoming football season. Most of the time while we were coming up with cheers on the sidelines, the fresh new round of quarterbacks would hoot and holler for our new uniforms.

I'll admit, they were very sexy. But I really couldn't get my mind off of me and (Y/n)’s sleepover last night. She had simply fallen asleep on my chest, her silk nightie rode up at the bottom leaving her lace painties in view. I was quick to pull the dress back down-but my mind had wondered if I had proceeded things differently.

My parents weren't home and it would've been the perfect opportunity. But instead I was too scared of what she would say or the possibility of ruining our friendship.

My kicks and flips were the worst it had ever been throughout practice and the other girls could tell. And much to my embarrassment they thought it was because of Tatum messing around with Stu. As if I could care less what that whore did with my lay! And the bigger fact of the matter is Stu dosen’t even want Tatum either-hes just fucking her till he gets bored.

I couldn't do it anymore, I was sexually frustrated. From the pent of feelings for my best friend and the fact Tatum continued to pretend she didn't keep stabbing me in the back over and over again.

I had noticed Steve staring at me throughout his drills, and decided to call him over once me and the girls took our two hour break from practice. Seducing him wasn't that hard-it was obvious he thought more with his dick than his own head.

The locker room was thankfully deserted giving us enough time to get an hour of pleasure in. The poor boy took it the wrong way and thought I wanted to go out with him-it wasn't a bad idea though. Steve was cute and had a lot going for himself, and seemed somewhat of a decent guy, plus it gave me an excuse to dump Stu.

I can only hope he doesn't get too angry about it down the line.

August 7th 1996,

Okay so the breakup didn't go as smoothly as I had hoped-but it was better than I had originally had expected.

Stu wasn't as furious about the breakup as I thought he was going to be, he only seemed a tad bit frustrated with something I couldn't understand. Even with the many accusations I had tossed his way about screwing Tatum and wanting (Y/n) all for himself. He seemed only focused on the fact that (Y/n) wouldn't be around that much anymore-he has a serious problem he needs to solve.

And I told him that. (Y/n) isn't his-and she never will be.

That's what started it-the rampage the boy went on. I had never seen Stu so livid from just telling him he couldn't have her. The one girl he wanted. He did not place his hands on me or anything but kept screaming for me to get out of the house. I did leave in a rush, afterall I had my current new boyfriend outside waiting to comfort me.

But when the news broke out, things started to flip upside down. I think the only person that was disappointed in me was (Y/n). She couldn't believe what I had done-cheating on Stu with Steve and causing such drama amongst the group. In my opinion I had done nothing wrong-it was Tatums fault for fucking Paul then going after Stu while we were in a relationship.

I didn't understand why she was taking Stu’s side either, it hurt hearing she didn't want to lie to him and say I didn't do what I did. Or how much I hurt him.

I lost my temper. I'll admit it, yelling at her wasn't the way to go. And I might have said something I wasn't proud of. But it was how I felt at the moment- she didn't need to worry so much over Macher if she was MY friend! If she was MY everything!

But that's the thing she's not mine. But she should be.

August 12th 1996,

Today was the first day of school, my senior year. One semester away from saying goodbye to these bloodsucking vermin in the dust once and for all. Mom wished me luck this year, we had a long prayer at the breakfast table for scholarships and hopefully a bright future ahead. The only thing that seemed out of place was the empty chair beside me; (Y/n)’s place at the table.

This was the first time she wasn't over for the first day of school with me. We usually had sleepovers the night before, gossip-made bets on what's going to transpire but no-I had made the ultimate mistake of yelling at her and degrading her for voicing her opinion.

I called her Stu’s whore.

I didn't mean it of course, but it was something I said to hurt her-the last thing I had wanted to do.

The first day of school was okay, it turns out I have a few classes with (Y/n) and Sidney, fortunately I don't have any with Tatum ,Stu or Billy. But Randy is in my science and history class. Randy wouldn't shut up talking about how cute (Y/n) looked today, and I couldn't shake the feeling of jealousy as many men in the school watched her up and down the school halls.

She wore her hair up into a high afro ponytail, swirls of her hair laid upon her head. I couldn't help but stare at the loose flannel-her shoulders were bare, and she wore some jean shorts with some beat up converse. During class I couldn't help but stare, even with Sidney encouraging me to speak to her I couldn't. And I felt as though if I tried talking to her about it something else might have transpired.

I couldn't tell her my feelings for her. What would my parents say? Not to mention the whole student body. Being gay in this town isn't uncommon but many people, especially adults are old fashioned. Last time I checked (Y/n)’s Aunt even had something sly to say about girls viewing each other's bodies if they are not family.

I can't win. Not if I leave this hell hole and start anew.

Would it be a possibility that (Y/n) would come with? Come with me to start a new life away from all of this? I would let her watch movies whenever she wants and help her through school.

I want her dreams to become a reality. I want to be there every step of the way, to see her on that red carpet of the movie she makes. The series of horror movies that would have the world in a chokehold.

I want to be that wife, her holding my arm as she waves shyly to the cameras for me to beam down at her in pride.

I would give her everything Stu couldn't and more!

August 13th 1996,

I can't believe Tatum had the nerve to try to give me advice to please Steve in the bedroom! For her information Stu’s so obviously pretending she’s (Y/n) while fucking her brains out. The worst part is everyone knows about Tatum and Stus relationship now, not that they're a fan of it-it's just new gossip.

Apparently (Y/n) didn't like the relationship, that's what Sidney said. But I don't understand why. Everytime Stu gets into a relationship with someone (Y/n) says it's not a good match- or both parties deserve better.

It's almost like she wants him-

(The page was torn off halfway)

August 15th 1996,

(The page is filled with many crossed out words and x’s making it illegible to read) (It was almost as if she couldn't bare to process what she was writing)

August 17th 1996,

I couldn't take it anymore! I had to talk to (Y/n) and make up with her! These past few days of silent treatment were getting to me. Not only has Tatum noticed, but Sidney as well. It was embarrassing to know that her other friends have been asking me what's going on when I've known her for the longest. They don't even care about her as much as I do!

But it's not just my feelings for (Y/n) that have been consuming my thoughts lately. I've been struggling with my sexuality, and it's been eating me up inside. I've never told anyone, not even my best friend, about the way I feel. It's like this big secret that I'm carrying around, and it's starting to feel suffocating.

I know that (Y/n) would never judge me, but the fear of rejection and the unknown terrifies me. What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if she thinks I'm weird or gross? I can't risk losing my best friend, but at the same time, I can't continue living this lie.

The looks that Stu and Billy have been giving me lately only make things worse. It's like they know something about me that I don't even know myself. I feel like a fraud around them, like they're constantly judging me.

I don't know what to do. I'm so confused and scared. All I know is that I can't keep living like this. I need to talk to someone, anyone, about how I'm feeling. But who can I trust? Who can I confide in?

For now, I'll keep my secret to myself and focus on repairing my friendship with (Y/n). But I know that this is something that I need to address eventually.

Of course she was reluctant to talk but I had bribed her to let me in with three packs of her favorite popcorn and of course five packs of licorice. She took the popcorn and candy and allowed me to have an hour to say what I wanted to say before I was asked to leave.

I understand her anger. We've been best friends for years, and I called her such an unforgivable thing because I was jealous of the attention she was giving Stu. I felt terrible, and I told her everything. I apologized and begged for her forgiveness. I could see the pain in her eyes, and I knew I had hurt her deeply. But thankfully, she eventually forgave me, and we hugged it out. It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

But now, I'm left feeling guilty about how I treated (Y/n) and how I let my jealousy get the best of me. I need to work on my insecurities and learn to communicate my feelings better. (Y/n) is my best friend, and I never want to hurt her like that again.

August 31st 1996,

(This entry was ripped out aggressively to what seemed like not too long ago.) (investigators eventually found the entry locked in a secret chest underneath Becker’s bed along with her previous diaries and most treasured items.)

September 8th 1996,

Slowly but steadily I've been getting closer to (Y/n), we've even started making plans on what to do for Halloween! It's her favorite month. All the decorations, costumes, and of course the horror movies. She did seem a bit down today when I mentioned dressing up together as playboy bunny girls, clearly she was expecting something more her speed.

I know-I know what you're thinking. Why would I want to dress up as a playboy bunny costume when (Y/n) clearly wants to dress up as a slasher? Well it's simply because it gives me an excuse to have her wear something revealing all night, and second she's a slasher every single year.

It's time to do something different. No more bloody (Y/n). Instead we'll have a super hot one instead.

In the end she said she would think about it, but with the way she looked over longingly at Stu and Billy; maybe just maybe I should be a slasher with her this year.

September 15th 1996,

Unfortunate change of plans, my parents announced that they were visiting family the week of Halloween. And for once I hated the thought of leaving here without (Y/n) by my side. In the past with her being alone on Halloween always sits wrong with me, and the fact is she wouldn't be alone; Stu and Billy always ended up being there.

Sick? Stu and Billy would come over. Aunt Gia unable to take her to the movies? Mrs. Macher would fill in, Stu dragging (Y/n) to the backseat. If I was out with the other girls dressing girly? Billy would immediately pull out a Micheal Myers mask and a bucket for candy.

I just can never get the timing right on Halloween to be with her. On her favorite holiday.

I might as well push these feelings to the side and let Stu or Billy have her this Halloween. Just like they always do. This time Tatum and Sidney won't be able to deny their boyfriends attraction to (Y/n).

September 19th 1996,

I can't believe I lost my diary for three days! And that's not even the worst part. Tatum was the one who gave it back to me. I was spiraling, hoping that she had some sense and did not read any of it.

Imagining the thought of her reading it sent chills down my spine. Not only would Tatum be out for my blood but (Y/n)s as well; even though the two girls get along fine now- I just know Tatum would immediately flip the script and try to ruin her life.

So what if (Y/n) had feelings for Stu and Billy. She likes Randy now. Even though I’m trying to be the main contender for her love-even I had to face the reality that she wasn't going to go for someone in a relationship. If I was to confess my feelings to her it most definitely would have to be after I dump Steve.

Don't get me wrong, the boy is really nice and sweet. He'd be the perfect boyfriend for me if I wasn't you know ‘a little sparkly’. The sex is good too and he even knows how to communicate well. The only argument we've had thus far was about how much time I've been spending with (Y/n) lately, it resulted in me crying and guilt tripping him.

He was getting a little bit too close to the truth.

But that's not what I'm afraid of. This afternoon I asked Tatum how she found my diary. Turns out she wasn't the one who found it.

It was Stu who had it for the weekend.

September 21st 1996,

Tonight (Y/n) came over to hang out as usual. Soon we were gossiping and talking about others' relationships before it shifted back to mine. (Y/n) apparently don't like how quickly me and Steve got together, and to be honest she was making some good points. Hooking up with boys and then immediately becoming a couple was very misleading and isn't how relationships should be formed.

The conversation got intense however once she suggested we watch a horror movie, we fell back into our normal routine. She did say something that threw me off though. She said if I was in the horror movie I would be the dumb blonde that dies first.

As if! I'm clearly too smart to die in a horror movie! I joked around with her about it and asked if she remembers the promise if I were to die. Of course she remembered but knew she wouldn't have to do it till we were daily older.

To me it doesn't matter how old we get together. She'll always be my everything in my eyes.

I had asked Steve to come over Wednesday to watch a movie, but obviously that's not what we're going to do. That night will be the last time I ever mess around with a boy, and Thursday morning I'll be single and ready to confess to my best friend.

I can only hope she reciprocates my feelings.

☿

August 31st , 1996

Last night was a total nightmare. I don't know who to be more angry at Sidney-or that bitches friend Tatum! We were all invited over (Y/n)’s house to sleepover and have a great time.

Unfortunately things took a twisted turn-

Screams emitted through the TV as the four girls settled across the living room floor. (Y/n) was snuggled up on Casey's side sharing a blanket as Tatum and Sidney were laid across the couch; apparently Tatum valued comfort rather than the floor, but Sidney did remain on the floor laid up against the couch with her sleeping bag.

It was a good thing the movie had subtitles since it was in Japanese; the plot in the movie was about a series of mass murder of teen girls who've all dated the boy. Upon the grand reveal it turns out it was his childhood best friend, her love for him was so obsessive that she resulted in killing all potential suitors for her friend. One might argue it was sick and twisted, but was it so different from many murder cases in the US? Sure some of the scenes were very violent, including the parts on how she disposed of the bodies; however jealousy and obsession can turn deadly quickly if not caught on to.

The alleged ‘final girl’ ran down the school corridor, running into the male protagonist as he tried to calm her down. Her hand was gone, blood practically spraying and pooling along the floor, (Y/n) would have to give it to the directors, the protruding bones look so real.

“All bets in that she's not going to survive,” Casey muttered.

(Y/n) hummed, “Yeah she already lost her virginity, so she already lost in that regard. Not to mention she was seen drinking a few scenes ago.” The two friends had watched so many scary movies at this point that they could predict when someone was going to die, or the ‘twist’ the directors were trying to pull.

The killer rounded the corner, her mouth and face going slack as the male lead and her locked eyes. The boy seemed shocked for a moment before he began to question her on why and how she was doing this. The subtitles were fast but the girls could get the gist of what was being said from the brief words on the screen.

“Wow,” Tatum scoffed, “What a love confession. Someone please kill me if I ever become that desperate over a man.”

“Wait,” Sidney watched as the boy started to step closer, his eyes brimming with tears, “Is he…is he confessing back?! After all the girls he’s slept with and had died due to her, he wants a relationship with her?”

This caught (Y/n)’s attention, she watched how the two childhood friends embraced one another as the other girl cried out to the boy pleading for him to stay-to save her. Only for the male to take the knife from the killer and kill the final girl himself. Something about the scene made it hard to look away.

‘How can someone choose a killer rather than the innocent?’

“He's in love with her,” She muttered, “so much he's willing to kill another innocent person in order for them to be together.” Something fluttered in her heart at the sheer devotion they have towards one another. They way they looked at eachother-no more secrets all the obstacles that were there before have been removed. The two halves of the same whole acn be together at last.

The screen cuts to a house, the childhood friends had gotten married and one would guess moved to another city to leave their choices behind. What caught the afro haired off guard was how happy the couple looked, they had even achieved a loving family; a pair of twins and a four year old boy all sitting at the table sharing grace before credits started to roll.

Casey shifted a bit, “Well, that movie was-,”

“Amazing-,”

“Shit,” Tatum snarled, “How can he want that ugly bitch and kill the good looking one? Isn't this Japanese? Wasn't it the standard to marry for good looking kids and successors?” The girl's attitude threw the other three girls for a loop.

(Y/n) still wanted to argue her point, “I think it's a good film! It's a lot different from the horror movies I usually watch, and I think the fact that the childhood friends got together despite everything was a good twist and satisfying ending.” She got up from Caseys side and went to retrieve the tape and grab another movie, “Here, we can watch a Chick flick next since you didn't like-”

“You think all childhood friends should end up together huh, (Y/n)?”

The girl paused her movements at the question. She didn't understand why the question seemed so-hostile. Casey sat up and shot Tatum a look, clearly disliking where this was going. Sidney on the other hand had a very uncomfortable expression on her face, almost like she was expecting this.

“Well, sometimes yes,” (Y/n) shrugged the stranged feeling off, “Think about it. They’re the ones that know each other most inside and out. Look at most successful marriages for instance-they were either childhood friends or friends and with each other for a long time.” She popped in ‘She’s All That’ before turning to the strawberry blond, “Plus my parents were childhood friends. That's why their marriage was so successful.”

There was an uncomfortable silence in the room.

Something shifted behind Tatum's eyes; malice, spite, fueled by jealousy. “Oh, so you're assuming that Me and Stu’s relationship is going to be temporary since we were not childhood friends?”

(Y/n) made a face at the mention of her friends name, her heart contorted “No! That's not even what I was trying to say-”

“It was implied-”

“Fuck off Tatum,” Casey barked, “The only reason why he’s with you is because your so willing to lay on you back for him.”

They all had to have known it was true. Tatum was so desperate for the boy to acknowledge her since the seventh grade. Going as far to change her style three times before settling on the busty mean girl persona; of course she wasn’t mean all the time-just liked the look.

Other than that Casey wasn't going to let the girl accuse her friend of these things without proof. (Y/n) wasn't the type to go after someone elses’ boyfriend; however with the information the blonde knew about she did feel a bit hypocritical.

Stu wanted (Y/n). Did she know if it was the same the other way around? No. Was she still going to defend her anyway? Absolutely.

Tatum whipped her head over to the other blond practically giving her whiplash. Her face was red now in embarrassment or fury one could barely tell. “Oh! Just like how you were so willing to do that same-,”

“At least I didn’t fuck my friends boyfriend while they were in a committed relationship-”

“It was only two times-”

“Two times too many!” Casey huffed, “Is this what you came here for? To start something with (Y/n) because you know she's the nicest out of the rest of us?”

Tatum rolled her eyes, “You act like she's a newborn, she can defend herself,” She took a swig of her cola before shifting her eyes to her best friend, “Besides I’m not the only one with questions, Sidney does as well.”

(Y/n) zeroed in on Sidney, the girl was fiddling with the sleeve of her sweater. Something about her whole demeanor screams ‘guilty as sin’; as if she just got done something unforgivable. In this case she felt pressured to get to the bottom of why Billy had this slight obsession with the girl in front of her.

Sidney did have a question about Billy and her relationship, and she wanted the girl to be honest about it. She wouldn't be mad if there was something before,but it would mean things between her and her boyfriend would be called into question.

“Y-you have something to ask me Sid?”

Sidney nodded, “Yeah, um I went over Billy’s house the other day, and I saw a lot of things in his room that surprised me is all,” Surprise would be an understatement, her heart felt like it was being ripped into thirds with the items she came in contact with. They haven't been dating for long but she felt like she really liked him, but there's only so much one can take, “You-uh-you guys have a lot of photos with each other. Even with his mom and dad-and uh-Stu was in some of them too..”

She was trying to give a hint to the girl about what she was trying to say. Sidney knew no boys or men who would have that many pictures of a girl visible. Especially in a relationship. It wasn't like it was just on his desk, no-it was all around his house. On the hallway walls, in his dads office-in the kitchen-everywhere. Mr. Loomis almost seemed shocked that Sidney even earned the title ‘Girlfriend’.

‘What happened to (Y/n)?’ Billy’s Father voiced out loud.

Billy stilled for a moment his eyes hazy, ‘(Y/n) has been busy with school lately,”

His father simply cocked an eyebrow and said nothing more. Sidney had never felt more embarrassed and out of place; she knew what the question really meant and what answer Billy’s father was looking for. He wanted to know why (Y/n) wasn't the one at the table with them with the title instead of Sidney.

“So are you asking if I have the same pictures as him?” The girl cut through the silence.

Sidney shook her head, cheeks pink. She didn't know why this was frustrating her-it was just a question. So with a deep breath she ripped off the bandage, “Did you and Billy ever have a secret relationship?”

(Y/n) sputtered as her face grew warm at the question, sure she had secretly entertained the idea of having Billy as a boyfriend but it quickly went out the window once she realized her long term feelings for Stu. It should've been easy to answer back at the question but she was so surprised with the way it was said threw her for a loop.

“No, me and Billy have never had that sort of relationship.” She finally stated.

The brunette didn't seem convinced, “What about the nickname they both gave you. Billy and Stu,” Billy had a habit of calling (Y/n) by her nickname rather than her real name, even in Sidney's presence. It would be different if it was something funny, or a common nickname given among friends, but it was so intimate. And (Y/n) didn't notice it like the other girls did.

Sidney didn't even have an intimate nickname. Billy just called her ‘Sid’ like everyone else.

“What nickname? You mean (N/N)? Billy and Stu haven't called me by that name in years-”

“No! The other one!” Sidney persisted, “The intimate one. You’ve got to remember, Billy calls you it all the time when you're not around-,” The girl paused for a moment, her thoughts sinking in. What if Billy and Stu never said the nickname to the girls face once they got to highschool; it has been a long time since Sidney and Tatum was thrown into the mix in regards to their group. “Did Billy and Stu ever call you anything else in your presence?”

The afro haired paused, thinking it over before answering. There was one nickname Billy and Stu used to call her by sometimes, but it was just while they were watching movies and alone with the three of them. It was around about ninth grade when the nickname was made; Billy insisted that they call her by it.

“Final Girl,”

There was silence again. If there was a way from steam to whistle out of Tatum's ears they all would have heard it.

“Excuse me?” Sidney said, “They call you what?”

(Y/n) bit her lip, “Final girl, Billy insisted I be called that. You know Final girls are the ones that-”

“That’s not the name I was talking about. You mean to tell me you have another one-?”

“Did you fuck Stu instead?” Tatum cut in, “If you couldn't have one friend you might as well go for the other one-”

“Tatum,” Sidney hissed. This wasn't how she wanted to go about doing things. Backing (Y/n) in a corner like this was just bullying her, and if she did have private relationships with either boy it wasn’t for them to know. (Y/n) even had the right to refuse not to answer.

The afro haired girl gripped her band tee in frustration, “I didn’t fuck anyone!” She got up and glared at Tatum in frustration, she didn't understand the girl's deal. She had won already, she had Stu all to herself, “You both have Stu and Billy as your boyfriends and spend so much time with them to the point we three don't hang out as much anymore! When would I have the time to even get the chance to do something like that?”

“Can we just all calm down for a second-,”

“Did you ever have feelings for Stu or Billy?!”

“What does it matter?!” (Y/n) cried, “You have both of them! You won! Tatum you fuck Stu every single day! And Sidney you watch movies with Billy all the time-!” The girl cut off a lump forming in her throat as she could see her favorite boys doing the activities with her friends. Something inside twisted and lurched-her eyes growing warm and sight blurry.

This was all enough for Sidney and Tatum to see the girls true feelings. One felt sympathetic with the reaction, the other on the other hand-.

“I told you!” Tatum pointed, “I knew there was something going on with those three! So how did it feel being Stu and Billy’s whore all throughout ninth grade-” The girl was cut off with a pillow connecting to her head.

Casey loomed over the other girl, her face contorted in rage, “Say that again. I dare you.”

The two other girls stood up immediately with how Casey was standing over Tatum, they knew if a hit landed there was no coming back from this. Also (Y/n) didn't want anyone to be fighting inside her house, her Aunt would have a fit knowing why her living room looked a mess. She would be okay with a bit of fun-not a full out brawl.

(Y/n) sighed sadly, “Tatum, Sid - you guys need to leave.”

A sad solemn look took over Sidney's face at the girl's tone, “Wha - No look I'm sorry can we just pretend this conversation didn't happen?” It was wistful thinking, but she honestly didn't want to leave things this way between everyone. They were supposed to have fun; Sidney wanted to ignore the boy problems for one day and just enjoy the presence of her friends without any problems. (Y/n) didn't deserve to be asked questions that way tonight, especially about the two people she saw as her best friends for the longest time.

“Pretend?” Said Casey, “After the two of you tried jumping down her throat! You want to pretend you didn't do anything?!”

The blonde stormed over to the two sleeping bags grabbing them and rushing back to the front door. Tatum finally got up from the couch in shock, following after the angry girl. Not a single one of them had ever seen Becker this upset, sure she argued and had a sharp tongue but throwing their things outside of the house was way beyond what they could imagine.

“Casey! Are you fuckin crazy-?!”

“For my best friend? Yes!” Casey yelled, “Now are you going to grab your backpack yourself or am I going to have to grab them for you?”

(Y/n) wiped tears from her eyes, “Cas at least let them call their parents-”

“Tatum's house is two blocks away, they can kick rocks.”

It was quick with how the girls left, and the afro haired girl felt a sense of dread with the door closing. It was only when Casey placed a hand on her shoulder did she break down. In some way she blamed herself for them-for their actions and jealousy towards her. She allowed her best friend to guide her towards the couch before she left to get some water and tissues. She stared blankly at the chick flick on the screen, she didn't know why she chose that one.

It was Tatum's favorite. And it was her least favorite.

Casey came back with a glass of water, tissues and a pack of red licorice in her hands, “You okay?” It was a rhetorical question of course, but it was better to ask rather than not asking.

“Would I really be considered a whore if I liked Stu and Billy?” The girl sniffed, “Is it really that bad that I used to have feelings for them? I mean I like Randy now but is it bad that I acknowledge Stu would never look my way because I wasn't enough-”

Casey grabbed the girl's hands, cutting her off , “You are enough. It's their fault they couldn't see that,” She proceeded to wipe the girls cheeks clean of tears, “And in my opinion they've lost the best thing to ever enter their lives. You.”

Silence filled the room for a moment. Nothing could be heard over the girls sniffles and the faint sound of the movie in the background. Casey simply held the girl in her embrace, rubbing up and down her arms in a soothing motion to calm her down.

“Casey,” The girl whispered softly.

“Hmm?”

“If I dont have anyone else, it'll just be me and you right?”

Casey looked down at her friend, a loving smile taking place on her pink lips, “Of Course. We don't need them. It'll just be me and you against the world.” The girl unexpectedly sprung up off the sofa and headed over to the pile of movies, “I think this chick flick isn't our speed! Lets watch another horror movie, any recommendations?”

(Y/n) gave a watery smile, “I got another japanese film we could watch,”

“Cool! Which one is it?” The blonde shuffled through the tapes.

“It's the one with the two bloodied friends on the cover. It's called, ‘Forget Me Not’.”

#billy loomis x black reader #billy loomis x reader #stu matcher x black reader #stu matcher x reader #scream movies #scream #casey becker #Spotify

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starlightshore · 8 months

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explain Danny phantom to someone who’s never seen it before?

uhhhhh so i can only talk about it as the most insane kinda fandom person because

i was obsessed with this show when it first aired when I was 8 years old. it was my first fandom. i read fanfic for it before i even knew what fanfic was. its HEAVILY tied to my nostalgia and I've been engaging with the fandom on/off for literally 19 years. at this point DP is in my DNA.

while it's not my main hyperfixation (thats undertale) its the one tag i visit regularly and the one fandom I'll jump to every few months and binge fics for. i don't even read UT fics anymore but the DP fandom is always doing something. its very active!

under the cut I talk about my thoughts on the show, the fandom and explain the premise. It's a wild ride.

TLDR; i have a lot of THOUGHTS on this show and i do not actually recommend it. MAYBE if you're curious explore the fandom and some fics but be careful about it, it's a bit gratuitous with its angst.

If you want a basic premise: local 14 year old accidentally lets loose hell but also has become part ghost. This kid can fit SO much trauma in him.

first off: I fucking love Danny Phantom.

And I'm going to spend the next two segments complaining about it. Feel free to skip if you're already aware of this /or don't wanna linger on it.

Second off: This show fucking sucks*

* Ok fine yes sometimes it can be good, but it will always have an asterisk next to it.

it has NOT aged well. it was created by an asshole who's got a long shitlist of things he's done and still does that's all terrible. i am not one to hate someone publicly unless its for something like this. Feel free to google what Bitch Fartman has done if you're curious but I'll warn you: he is a horrible person and he disgusts me. I only acknowlege him when its to mention how awful he is and how I do not want to support him.

This is not like with FNAF where supporting that franchise supports Scott. Danny Phantom first aired 19 years ago. The show was written, directed, and sure as hell animated by a team of professionals. It is not his sole creation. Studio Animation is not the sole work of an individual. I respect (most) animators and the hard work they've done and do. IIRC Shitfartman doesn't even have the rights to the IP anymore. I assume he gets residuals though. That said the only canonical piece of media we've gotten is a graphic novel that was released last month. Up until then, supporting DP was just not literally a thing you could do!

Its not just the creator who sucks. There's a lot of BS in the show too.

the show is very early 2000s (and even then thats no excuse) and it has a bingo card worth of shit in it. racism, bigotry, ableism! you name it. I do not condone and i do NOT recommend this show because of this! its horrible with what they did with this show and its shocking it was acceptable enough to put on TV. you literally can't do shit like that anymore.

I'm not going to go list every detail of every horrible, fucked up thing the show has done. The list is too long and I haven't watched the actual show in a few years now. by god, I know there is a list out there though.

Anyway outside of my obligatory "fuck this show actually" rant aside

i do love this show because it DOES have a lot of good and cool stuff outside that. but also. its so much wasted potential.

the core premise is:

Hey what if a pair of paranormal obsessed mad scientist parents punched a hole into the after life hell dimension- and what if their son was basically spiderman-ed about it?

youtube

And here's the core part of the premise: Danny only keeps his identity a secret to the humans. Ghosts learn like, pretty much straight away that he's a Halfa (half human, half ghost). He's if spiderman's worst fear wasn't the villains but if like. Aunt May was going to rip him apart.

Oh yeah that's. a thing. Danny's parents literally want to rip his ghost identity apart from, and I quote, "molecule to molecule."

For a an comedy-action show its WEIRDLY morbid and dark at times but then has the tonal whiplash to make you question what the fuck did they just do. How'd they do that and then not care they just wrote that in. Seriously. It'll just lore drop or hint to dark things and then brush it aside because it's main focus is comedy.

Anyway back to explaing what the show even is about. the show likes to say Danny got his DNA merged with ectoplasm but that's stupid af i'd rather say he died but only stayed half dead. He can transform between the two states: living and dead. But he's not just two halves that make a whole -the two sides blend together. He can use his ghost powers as a human -and early on he couldn't control them so he'd just. go intangible or invisible at the worst moments.

The show just. jumps right in. You don't get to see the accident outside the intro (at least until season 2 when they retcon some stuff) you just have it thrown into your lap. He has powers now. He sucks at it. Deal with it.

I think it's important to acknowledge that this show was written before Netflix did streaming. Before Plot heavy cartoons were a thing. (Not to say they didn't have reoccuring plot, it justw asn't the same thing as it is now.) You had to write the show with the limits of:

Comedy being a major focus

You have to write it with the expectation that anyone could jump in and (reasonably) understand most things going on. While there's some continuity and plot progression, the status quo is god.

because streaming wasn't a thing yet, you could only watch the show by jumping into whatever the fuck episode was playing. I doubt it played in order all the time. You just couldn't make a cartoon that had weeks upon weeks of plot developments and expect people to keep up.

The show is, in fact, meant for kids. While it does dive into some darker stuff (being ya know, a ghost show) its still going to be overly silly.

So while YEAH i'll complain about the very very shitty things the show did but I can't soley blame Fuckhateshitman for all of it. It's the restrictions it was made under + likely a lot more circumstances I don't understand. I am a hobbiest animator. I have no real world experience in the animation industry. I can critique the final product but I can never understand what shaped the cartoon. If shitheadmcgee wasn't involved and the studio gave the show more room + had you know, more POC and women on team + animation (even for kids) was respected more then who KNOWS what the show could of been! But like. its a 2000s show. It is what it is. I think the show has its good and bad and i'll harp a lot on the bad rn because I think its important to acknowledge especially to new people, but I do want to frame it by saying it really is the product of its time.

I want it to be better and I hope if it gets rebooted its better. We expect a lot more from cartoons now then we did then. (I know this was a long tangent + kinda over simplifying things but whatever, moving on.)

The (Ph)Fandom

19 years later and here we are. Enter the Phandom (called that before that phill and whoever used the term, idc i'm still going to use the term.) We, the fandom, almost completely just retconned the show's finale. (obviously SOME people still like it but its like. an incredibly small percentage) Like. we straight up pretend it didn't happen. i don't even want to get into it rn. It was SO BAD that the graphic novel that just released literally (spoilers) retconned everything about it aside from a ship pairing.

Anyway the Phandom- personally I think it goes a little TOO harsh in its angst. LIke, maybe a bit too much. But it DOES add nuance and explores the themes and lore that the show just flat out refused to engage with at all. It really digs into the premise of "hey wtf this 14 year is half dead. hello? hello??? thats fucked up.... lets explore that." and i'm here for it.

As long as its not like, masochistic and gratuitous for no real reason. 😬That is my biggest complaint with the fandom is that sometimes it goes over board.

But yeah outside of that, it can also be VERY silly so expect tonal whiplash here too! We got memes. We got fandom holidays and events. Whacky stuff.

OH AND OCs. We have fandom OCs like Wes. The best nonexistant character ever. Love that lil weirdo <3. His whole schtick was "What if Danny had another human villain? What if this random background classmate knew his secret and was trying to expose it?" and its spiraled from there. No one ever believes Wes and he's tortured by it. Some make him out to be a conspiracy nut while others make him more of a threat. (or a joke, as I do) Considering this show has a ghost-version of the Men in Black (Guys in White) conspiracy actually lines up accurately for what Wes does. And, you know. The Fenton's have a portal to the afterlife in their basement. Honestly pretty reasonable.

so like the fandom just kinda... picks and chooses the canon. It does have an edge of "we can do better" but in fairness, as I just discussed, there's an awareness that the version we make is not restricted by the environment the show was made under. I would hope most of the fandom understands this and doesn't say it in the sense of like "oh yeah I know better than professional writers and artists fuck the show 1000%" instead of acknowledging Yes He Fucking Sucks but its also more complicated. I don't want to foster an environment of superiority and disrespect to any media/creators (with exceptions ofc) cause. Jesus christ we live on the internet in 2023 you have to know why I feel this way by now.

Anyway with that in mind, I do think it's a positive thing! I mean, fuck, the show had no new content for almost 20 years I think its obvious by now we'd just make our own doll house out of it by now.

So yeah the Phandom is like this:

We're oddly consistent with the phandom lore we've built around from the canon's lore. We expand it, we make it more queer, we do our own thing. And I really enjoy it! I partake in it! It's pretty cool.

So while there's some merit to the OG show I would not recommend it on account of the amount of BS I mentioned at the start of the post. But I would recommend the fandom! As long as you got a strong black list with trigger warnings in place. Again, I think the fandom is a lil too gratuitous. But oh my god I love so much of what the fandom does. There's so many fics that just stick with me and (ha) haunt me. There's a reason I still come back after all these years. there are SO many good fics.

also the fandom got adopted by the DC fandom a year or two ago. personally i have to have like 80 tags blocked so i can even navigate the tag. Its not my thing but i'm happy people are having fun!!

#personal stuff #dp talk

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threehuskiesinatrenchcoat · 5 months

Text

rant

if someone tells me “why don’t you leave if it’s that bad” or “you deserve what’s happening to you” im gonna flip my shit. leave to fucking where, how? have you seen the average paycheck of a russian? and don’t fucking count moscow, i dare you. look at all those people barely scraping $300 a month for food and a roof over their heads with nothing else left and tell them that buying plane tickets and saving up enough to last god knows how long while waiting for a job permit AND searching for a job is EASY. oh, of course refugee programs are SO easy to get into, and everybody is just so excited waiting for russians to come (except european countries are considering closing borders because they’re tired of russians running). cuz everyone is so fucking hyped to have us there, right? same people that are gonna go on the internet later and say how much they wish russians would stop whining and leave, except, well, not to my country, to somewhere else, i wouldn’t want to live next to a ~terrorist~. speaking of, everyone is so fucking punk and immune to propaganda, yet believe when putin and his little circlejerk say that everybody fucking LOVES him? that people sign up for army willingly? that everyone "allowed" all this to happen? i’ve been to the fucking protests, i’ve seen people bloody & bruised getting hauled off into paddy wagons, i’ve seen people get a prison sentence for throwing a plastic cup at a cop on a riot, i've seen young men get jumped by authorities at metro stations and outside grocery stores so they could be given a drafting letter with no chance to escape, i’ve seen people getting ridiculous fines for standing outside with a PLAIN FUCKING SIGN because “we know what this is SUPPOSED to be about”. sasha skochilenko got 7 years in prison for replacing price tags at a store with anti-war messages, FUCKING STICKERS. get off your high horse and tell me, full fucking honesty, would you be protesting if you knew for sure, 100%, you’ll be going to prison when, WHEN, they catch you? and yet people STILL DO. and people still GET CAUGHT. and people get hunted and tortured and receive insane sentences for the stupidest things. “russians don’t do shit to stop the war” FUCK YOU. im tired of always being nice about this and trying to explain shit in hopes that someone will get it. fuck you for making this all about yourself (“yeah i feel bad for you but also can you imagine if this happened in the usa? oof”), fuck you for only caring when it’s convenient to paint yourself as a good person (why continue to spread awareness about ukraine when it’s not the hot topic of the day anymore?), fuck you for believing in lies and putin’s propaganda. everyone is so fucking aware and well-versed in politics on the internet. but it’s easy to be when your country cares about fucking human rights at least A LITTLE, right? it's easy to assume that free speech is everywhere and available to everyone, right?

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qulizalfos · 7 months

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bestie I know what tsad and acswy are but what are the other fics in ur bio 👀

hiiiii elli <333 hehe im so glad i can share these because theyre all SO FUCKING GOOD when i say brainrot i mean my brain is decaying over these /pos i am ghrfjhgjfhjnfsnhjfvbdbhfvbdhv

(and i am laughing very much rn because one of them is yours lol!)

oki so excluding the amazing tsad by @willelmikes and acswy by @campbyler both of which i could rant about for ages <3333 we have:

yaptm: your apparition passes through me by arian @callmetheidiot(hope you dont mind me tagging you<3) i am on chapter 3 also WHAHHTGRJRSFGHJNSDFGVHNJSDFGV okay okay im so normal sooo normal i am a Normal person 👍 jk AAAAAAAAAA im so invested in the plot, and the writing itself is so so masterful and the mystery elements of it are SO compelling arian i am obsessed with you and ur writing hope this helps!!!!!!! <333333

iwaftwth: is it was a flood that wrecked this Home by you <33 which btw i am literally thinking about always btw!!!!!!!! you have such an understanding of the characters its insane ITS THEM and such a good take on post vecna also FJNHESJVNHJNFSDNJFSNJVFSJNHVFS its just so heartwreching and beautifulllll and youre a really good writer!!!!!!! also i am yelling so loud over the i thought we were a team i thought i was ur best friend line :) in your walls even MWAH

ikte: is the i know the end series by @bookinit02(again i hope u dont mind if i tag you here!) which i believe you are reading or have read(?) but god when i say i am invested i am SOOO ghnfnhjsvfnjhfvnhjfg i loved the rewrite it was so so cool and also very fun to see inside their heads :DD and the s5 fic is perfect in every way and i love how in character everyone is, youve captured the dynamics so well! basically uh HJFRJHNFERJNHFE DEAD DEAD DEAD KILLED GAHHH <3 ty!

all of these are so top tier :) of course there are so many that i have been meaning to add (looks at girl crush by @wayward-sherlock LOOKS AT GIRL CRUSH BY @wayward-sherlock The mutual pining/jealousy/angst/fluff all at the same time fic by the way hehehehe)

those are the ones i have so far!!! highly recommend :D thank you so much for the ask!!! this got rlly long lmao

#lizaasks #mutuals #elli <3

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duckiemimi · 6 months

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Your latest post... god tell me about it lol

I knew a fanfic writer that started out small couple of months ago and ever since they've been getting thousands of notes on their work they've become so.... arrogant? Like in a sense that they've started being cocky and mighty about their work and then proceeded to make daily yaps and rants about how other writers are not writing the said character right and dictating and being bitchy how that character wouldn't do A or B? The audacity some people have is just insane to me. imagine constantly diminishing and shitting on other writers because they have a different interpretation of a character that ALSO happens to be a blank slate lol

oh, boy, so this is a universal experience for all fandoms, huh 😭 (or at least i’m assuming this is a different fandom…)

it’s always on the topic of characterization in fanfics! and it’s especially exacerbated when shipping’s involved! don’t get me wrong, i’m someone who tends to enjoy works that lean towards canon characterization (or at least my interpretation of it), but writers aren’t tethered to canon in fanworks. it’s called fanfiction for a reason! it’s a love letter for the source material, not a page from it!

it sucks when writers put other writers down because of dissenting opinions as if we’re not all here as fans to begin with, as if we’re not all here to have fun in the first place. we like the same things! why are we making nonissues issues? as long as you’re considerate towards other people in the fandom (because we all share space!), then it’s fine! writers tag appropriately, and readers have discretion!

i also wanted to add, just in case, that fanfic is different from actual analyses. where you build off of canon in fanfic, you work with what you’re given in analyses. (it’s why i love character studies! a neat, poetic hybrid!) anyway, headcanon is different from canon, so why harass people over it? especially if the character is a blank slate, like you said!

#fanfic #asks

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singsweetmelodies · 1 year

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just wanted to say that your charlos tags on the notp post were a WHOLE ASS MOOD

like i can't deny the chemistry because i'd have a lifetime supply of smoothies from the level of 🍓🍊🍌🥝🍇 in those c2 videos. but i just cannot indulge in it whatsoever

i can't even point to a specific moment that turned me from 'oh they have a fun teammate dynamic!' to a full-blown hater ('hater' is a bit strong but close enough) but it must've been something to do with the fans...

anyways, just wanted to express my gratitude for those tags. nice to know that i'm not alone

darling anon!! thank you so much for this ask - and oh, bestie, you are definitely not alone. you are so not alone, and i am actually hugging you rn, because it's always fab to find someone who agrees with your ship opinion 👌 sorry to the charlos fans out there, but it just can't be for us. #rip

and that third paragraph of yours - ah, man, i feel you so much. i also used to genuinely enjoy their teammate dynamic a lot (loved watching the c2 challenges, etc etc.) and i also can't quite point to a specific moment when this changed? but i do know the general themes about it, and since i had an incredibly long exhausting day at work today, i'm quite in the mood to rant about them. i will do so under the cut, though, lmao, because goodness knows i'm in a petty mood tonight.

any and all passionate charlos or just carlos sainz fans - please do not click on the readmore, because i'm not going to be terribly nice to your fav here, i'm afraid 🙃

so for me, when i first got into f1, it wouldn't have been inaccurate to say that i kinda loved carlos sainz. i loved the carlando/mclaren videos, and i loved the c2 challenges. he's funny, and he's pretty, and he has a cute dog, and he drives for ferrari... what more could you want?

the thing is, though. i am a charles girlie first and foremost. even though i liked carlos, he was never on the same level as charles for me. especially not in terms of driving - because, well, just look at the start of the 2022 season. enough said.

what started getting to me was that group of passionate carlos fans (the carlos girlies) who seemed to seriously think that carlos is a better driver than charles. they would slander charles and call him an inconsistent/reckless driver, while saying carlos was so much better. obviously, this rubbed me up quite the wrong way. and then at the same time, i was seeing carlos on my screen giving interviews where he would insist that if he'd had a few more laps, he would have overtaken max's red bull. like... i'm sorry, but that was never going to happen. in any world. pffft. (my thoughts at this point went: arrogant! he thinks he's better than he actually is.)

so that got me to like carlos himself a little less, which obviously has an influence on the ship as a whole. i mean, it would be hard to like a ship if you only really like one of the two partners in it, right? right? this is what i've always thought, anyway... except that a lot of charlos shippers seem to like carlos a lot more than charles. which is to say: in so many of their fics/characterisations, it's all glorifying carlos, while charles is essentially his arm candy with all the character depth of a rather pretty paper cutout. less than ideal...

the last thing, and perhaps the pettiest of all, lmao, is just that i'm incredibly possessive and insane about piarles. i acknowledge it. in fact, i fully own it. they are my ship, and i want them and only them to be endgame, always. now, obviously i don't expect everyone to agree with me 😂😂 but i don't particularly want to be seeing any content on my dash that features charles/anyone other than pierre as an endgame ship. and charlos usually is portrayed as an endgame ship/they're meant for each other etc. etc. well, sorry. to me, charles is meant for pierre, and pierre only. charlos is out. the end 🫶

#asks & answers #anon #anti charlos #anti carlos sainz #i always feel a bit 🙈 about using full-blown anti driver or ship tags #but i'd rather use them so any people who do enjoy this ship can avoid this post #because my word... i am petty tonight #and petty me is NOT kind to carlos sainz jr #not even a bit #i would say sorry but i'm not 🫶#man it felt SO GOOD to be unashamedly petty for a while #long days are long #but being a bit of a hater can always make you feel better 😌

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twinkodium · 8 months

Note

i started writing on this ask today before work but didn’t have time to send it off before i started….. so it’s a bit messy and it’s about a couple random posts you’ve reblogged today, good luck figuring out what posts im referring to shdjdhdjdj

the lil arthur tags on the gifs of charles 🥺 you didn’t ask but i’ve been in *such* an arthur mood recently… esp have been thinking a lot about his voice 🫶 and how him and charles sound pretty much identical at times 🫶 extra in love with arthur speaking french waaaaaa that video of him being angry at charles in french while streaming…….. lives in my head rent free

the hands on the waist is insane. just like the hand on the bicep. w o w. it’s not like it’s the first time but ?? 😵 also the way i didn’t say anything about his ass but… 👀 (love it so so so much)

pleaseeee podium in special suit and helmet and sweaty oscar and- the only thing that could’ve made it even better is if he hadn’t cut his hair 🫣

i’m sorry but im going crazy… yoUR TAGS ON THE POOL POST?? HELLO??? DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME??????? INSANEEEE it should be illegal to put those thoughts in my head! esp when they’re so good i might cry!! i’m gonna try to not get too worked up about it but….

(^ me rn)

yet again, this has turned into a novel 😶 i apologize, sweet dreams tonight love <3

Jackie, honey hellooo 🥹🥹

Ugh work is ruining our lives big time… I couldn’t enjoy the content today fully because I was at work when all them were dropped 😭

I figured out in 2020 during quarantine that they sound exactly the same if they both use their thick accents 😩 I remember Lando being confused of which one of them were talking all the time 😭 Arthur is just a clone of Charles. Same voice, same chaotic energy, no braincells, competitive in challenge videos yet always end up losing 🫣🫣 no I love Arthur but my bestie tagged me on a video I wished I’ve never seen because now if I think about Arthur that video just appears in my mind and NOPE!! Which video?? I can’t recall seeing that one 😭 send it over pls 🥺

HANDS ON EVERYTHING preferably on my neck but only happens in my imagination… sad times 🥴 PLS YOU CANT BE SILENT ABOUT THAT JUICY FINE ASS 😩😩 and the way he tilts his hip like that to have it in our faces is a war crime 😩😩 cuz we can only look and not touch 😠

Special livery, special helmet, black suits, will be a mental and physical race so they’ll be sweating like crazy 😮‍💨😮‍💨and if he ends up on the podium looking like that I’ll never shut up about it 🫠🫠 hair is okay tho and with him being sweaty it won’t make any difference 🤭🤭

OMG, I love how everyone is losing their minds reading my tags 🤭🤭🤭 sorry not sorry, woke up after a nice nap and ideas hit me hard after coming across the pic 😩😩 SUCH A BIG COMPLEMENT FROM YOU OMG I MIGHT CRY NOW 😭😭😭 all of your reactions make me think that I might should write it but like brainstorming and plotting is easy but actually writing the whole piece gives me a hard time always when I’m about to write something 😭 especially knowing myself and love for details it’d be longer than 10K+ words 🫣🫣🫣 I DUNNO I MIGHT GIVE IT A TRY 😏😏

Love you reaction🥹🥹 you’re so sweet 🥺🥺 ily

no worries baby, you can rant as long as you want 🥰 I’m here for all the chaotic asks you’re sending to me 🫶🏼 sweet dreams love 🥰🥰

#asks #jackie 🧡#buttercup 🥰#Oscar #Arthur #Charles #daily discussion with Jackie about Oscar 🥰#about the tags I really appreciate how many people liked it and actually reached out to say it 🥹🥹#I felt loved and appreciated I rare feel nowadays so 🥺 thank you #I might give it a go and try to write it for you guys 🫣

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the1975attheirverybest · 8 months

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I get that it upsets people to think about Matty possibly falling out with someone he was (seemingly) close with, but if I got online and saw people pitying me like that I’d commit a crime. Like you said, it dehumanizes him. He’s so patient and respectful with us, all he expects is the same patience and respect back. He already gives so much of himself to us, through his art and just daily interactions, no one should think they’re entitled to anymore than he’s willing to share. He’s literally talked multiple times about how he struggles with fame and how much the press fucked with him as a child, he was famous before but one month hanging around TS and suddenly he’s everywhere, it’s just sad to think that his own fans are participating in it.

It’s literally just gossip, but if it’s true, it doesn’t concern us. Friendships end all the time, people grow apart, shit happens. If all this TS stuff never happened no one would be questioning why he didn’t make it to the wedding.

It’s also disappointing because he JUST came back to socials. All this shit (starting with the TikTok) starts up and suddenly he’s gone again. Yeah, I’m sure it has to do with the breaks they’ve had and him spending time in LA, but part of me wonders if he just doesn’t feel like interacting with fans online when he doesn’t have to. I know he comes and goes all the time, but either way, he sees all of this bullshit and fans know it. Theories about his personal life should be kept in DMs (or preferably in their heads).

I know people send you dumb shit but you’re one of the few people I’ve seen actually shut it down, or give a logical, reasonable explanation. I’m also loving Reddit right now since the mods delete any speculation about his personal life.

Anyways, this ended up being way too long, and it’s also me being a hypocrite for speculating, but these past few months have been exhausting, I thought it would let up after May. I know he’s a celebrity but he’s not like most celebrities. He interacts with us like we’re on the same level, he willingly spends time in online fan spaces, he goes out his way to make us happy. Sorry for ranting in your inbox, but this all just bums me out.

Yes I strongly agree with this, especially his social media presence because I’ve seen the shit that people tag him in. And it’s insane. He’s got thick skin and a healthy detachment from peoples views of him but he’s still a human being. It can’t always be easy.

I don’t think we appreciate his love for his job and his fans enough. Some days in May were REALLLYYY hard for him. Twice he had to go onstage and perform less than an hour after some nasty articles were being published about him. I love my job and my students more than I love myself. I would do it for free if the university didn’t pay me. But I don’t know if I would be able to keep it together if I were in Matty’s shoes. And sometimes he was the one talking us down. “I’m still here and I love you guys.” “Some people they have people. I have you guys.” C’mon! How does it not feel awful participating in behavior that hurts him or is in any way shape or form harmful towards an artist like that? He’s so good to us and goes above and beyond all the fucking time. And he’s spoken so much about how important it is to him that he connects with people and builds this sense of community cuz it’s a way to combat the doom and gloom of our current state. He’s always open and generous and kind. He’s given stage props to fans. He’s had a fan onstage to play guitar for robbers. He’s played songs that were not on the setlist just cuz people have requested them and he’s humble enough to feel that the show is about the audience not about him, so he will go out of his way to give the audience the best time that he can possibly give. and his own fuckin fans are doing this to him??? Unacceptable. and I’m so tired of it. This fandom is way better than this. We never used to do this kind of thing. We should cut this shit out before it becomes permanent.

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madame-fear · 3 months

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What is with this HOTD fandom?! Never have I ever been part of a fandom that attacks each other the way this one does. I have never seen “fans” as malicious, cruel, and relentless as the ones in the HOTD fandom! It’s insane. Vicious people are running content creators into the ground or off Tumblr or ao3 completely simply because they don’t like a certain ship, or trope, or tag, or dynamic, or a certain character etc etc. Its like the thought process is “I don’t like x, y, or z so instead of simply ignoring that content and not reading it, I’m going to make this everyone’s problem and find the people that make this content and harass them as much as possible. I’m also going to find as many ppl to help me gang up on this person and destroy them! You like something I don’t so that makes you bad. You don’t think the way I do so you need to be dealt with!” Like come on y’all, so you don’t like smut, or fluff, or lucemond, or rhaenicent, or character x reader, or modern fics, or dead dove, or enemies to lovers, or alpha/omega, or bottom/top, or you hate Lucerys, or Aemond, or rhaenyra, or daemon, or Jace, or the Blacks, or the Greens or whatever there may be, like no one cares! No one cares you don’t like something in fandom! What happened to “ship and let ship?” If you don’t like something, that’s fine, that’s great, I hope you are able to find all content you do like, but you don’t have a free pass to trash other people! Just ignore it, don’t read that story, block that specific creator if you want, just move on and find the stuff you do like. Why do these ppl feel the need to turn into a vicious pack of hyenas, relentlessly attacking content creators, literally running them off with death threats and doxxing etc etc like damn y’all! You just experienced this a few days ago with an “anon” who turned out to be a username I recognized and have seen around for a long time. And here they are acting the way they did. Like what?!

HOTD isn’t real! It’s fiction! It can be whatever people want it to be, people can use whatever trope they want, completely random ships between completely nonsensical characters can exist, a story can be set in the Amazon or freaking space, a story can be the sweetest, fluffiest story to ever exist or it can be the strangest, darkest, most messed up thing you’ve ever read and that’s fine! It’s fine! Surround yourself with what you do like and just let other people live, why is that so hard?! So sorry for my rant, I had to get that out

FUCKING PREEEACH ANON, SAY IT LOUDER! Please please please rant as much as you wish, darling. 🗣🗣🗣

No you literally said EVERYTHING there was to be said about this fandom. I joined the fandom a day or two after the series ended, on October 2022 and BELIEVE me when I tell you that the fandom has gone completely deranged by now. I don’t like blaming anyone in particular, but I kind of have the feeling these big accounts that are always in the centre of some drama are the cause of the toxicity lingering in the fandom :/

I mean, I for example don’t like certain ships like Lucemond. It makes me feel so uncomfortable and off, and you know what I did? I filtered the tag, blocked some people on those tags, and went on with my life. I live and let live. I never even harassed someone or commented on their posts against their likings. This one big account that also started a huge ass drama recently was telling everyone to stop writing for bimboism because its anti-feminist or something — LIKE EXCUSE ME???? You don’t like something and you are making it EVERYBODY ELSES problem? Naur. And its worse when they send a troop of minions to attack and stupidly doxx... damn. I wouldn’t even be surprised if you already saw on other occasions the user harassing me previously... 🙄

I don’t like the concept/trope bimboism either and I never even considered on writing about it. But does that give me the right to tell everyone to stop writing for it because I simply dislike it? No, not at all! Because its also the right of other people to read and write for whatever they enjoy the most. Yes, she has her right to have her own opinion on her blog — but this shouldn’t apply only to a certain group of people! As far as I’m concerned, there’s something called freedom of speech; meaning we can all say and like whatever the fuck we want, unless you want to establish a mediocre social media dictatorship.

I also love how their friends stick up to them while they pretend to be on a hiatus to victimise themselves further. This one friend of them told a mutual "you will stand down" and "you will not win this" like the CLOWNING in here is real. Babygirl you are arguing against strangers online for a fucking fanfic trope, we aren’t in the middle of some medieval battlefield, wdym??? 😭😭

And also they blamed this same mutual telling her that she’s been harassing this one account for over a year (the big account mentioned previously that she had never seen my mutual before or something like that, and they never even talked before this???) even if the drama is recent, and said that... The drama was triggering the miscarriage this account had like a year ago. I swear to God this is too much to handle and it too sad. Especially to bring such tragic personal event like a miscarriage to put the weight on somebody else for an online argument about fictional tropes.

You literally said everything about this. I can’t believe we have to argue about this. And then the friend of a mutual said that its the right of the big account to have her own opinion but they aren’t respecting the opinions of others? Like damn just block people and filter tags, man. I don’t know what to tell you, because why would the world stop merely because you don’t like something and then everyone is like "OOO ESOKEEE🥺" to immediatly boost their ego by hating on other people going against what they say.

yk what, nonnie? You are absolutely fucking right. HOTD is fictional and we can do whatever the hell we want. And we shouldn’t be scared of speaking up. I’m tempted to publish my drafted post about this because I’m sick and tired of having to walk on knife edge just to not be harrassed. Thank you for the rant!

#hotd drama #hotd #house of the dragon #house of the dragon drama #┆ ⤿ 💌 come chat with amira .ᐟ ୭ #lovely anons <3 #rant #fandom ranting #ask box messages #ask box open #ask box #✧.* amiraverse

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