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#actually this time
pyroexcape · 4 months
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what if gay people were real. would that be fucked up or what
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morganski-19 · 7 months
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Things I Won't Say When I'm Sober: The Final Part
part 1, part 5
Steve is standing on Eddie’s porch, trying not to freak out. The nerves have been buzzing ever since the phone call ended. He could barely sleep but forced himself to try because he couldn’t think straight. Eddie probably couldn’t either, probably can’t even now. But Steve can’t wait any longer, so Eddie’s just going to have to deal with it while being hungover. 
Just getting into his car to drive here this morning made Steve so nervous he almost didn’t come at at. Having to face the drunken words that Eddie whispered into the phone last night is frightening. Especially since he might not even have meant to say it, might not even remember it. 
Steve has only seen Eddie drunk a few times. All of it has been like it was last night, slurring words and overly affectionate. If Steve was there next to him, Eddie would have been lying across him in some sort of way, just getting as close to Steve as he possibly could. Some of those times, Eddie would say something that he didn’t remember the next morning, but would own up to it in the morning, cause it came out of his mouth so it must have been true. Drunk words being sober thoughts and all that. 
The thing is though, the words Eddie spoke didn’t feel like drunk words. Sure he was drunk, but Eddie said it so softly that it sounded like he meant it. There wasn’t any slurring, no messing up  or taking any breaks. He knew what he was saying, just needed the confidence to do so. 
For some reason, that was what Steve scared the most. He was prepared to deal with it being a joke, that Eddie was just messing with him because he was wasted. He was prepared for Eddie to take it all back and run away from his feelings and they would just go back to normal. 
What scared him though was if Eddie admitted it. Admitted that he meant what he said and he does like Steve back. He wants something more and hopes to god that Steve wants it too. He doesn’t think Steve likes him back, so he’d be scared and hope that they could still be friends after this. The same fear that has crushed Steve since he realized too.
Admitting it to him isn’t what scared him though, what happens after does. Would they give this a try? Would it work? Or would it all come crumbling down like the last time Steve was in love?
Steve isn’t in love with Eddie, not yet. But he can tell that given the chance, he could. And he knows that that love could be really good. The type of love you know could last forever, but when it doesn’t it leaves you shattered. Steve doesn’t want to shatter again. He knows that Eddie has the capability to do it though. The feelings that he has for the other man are just too much for him to handle. 
With a shaky hand, Steve knocks on the door. He has to get this over with, has to know. Can’t walk away without knowing if he meant it. If the words whispered so quietly that Steve could barely hear are true. 
The door creaks open as Steve is met with Eddie in his pajamas, squinting at the sunlight. “Hey, Steve,” he says, almost defeated.
“Hey, can I come in?”
“Can’t say that I’ll be the best company, but sure.” After Steve walks into the trailer, Eddie lets the door slam shut before walking over to the couch and faceplanting with a long groan. 
“Tough night?” Steve asks, acting innocent. 
Eddie turns his head to the side to glare at Steve. “Take a look in the trash can.”
Lifting up the lid, Steve finds a pile of beer bottles. “Yeah, sounds about right. You eat yet?”
“No, been trying not to throw up.”
“I’m making you some food,” Steve concludes, already opening the fridge. He expects Eddie to protest, but he says nothing. 
He starts the coffee pot before cracking some eggs into a pan. Eddie slumps off of the couch before slinking over to the counter, taking a seat when Steve plates the eggs. 
“Thanks,” he mutters as Steve slides the plate in front of him. Steve pours coffee into a mug and adds sugar and creamer before placing that in front of Eddie as well. 
He washes the dishes as Eddie eats in silence. When Eddie finishes the eggs, he washes that plate too. 
“So,” Steve starts, not exactly knowing how to finish. “You called me last night.”
Eddie hangs his head. “Yeah,” he presses his fingertips into his eye, “Yeah I did.”
“You remember what you said?” Steve asks, heart beating fast.
He shakes his head, ashamed. “Yeah, shit.” Eddie braces his elbows on the counter and holds his head in his hands. “I do.”
“Ok.” Steve doesn’t quite know how to move on. 
“Did you, did you hear everything?” Eddie says, muffled by his hands. 
Steve crosses his arms and leans against the sink. “I think I did.”
“Shit, I’m too hungover for this conversation.” Eddie continues to hide in his hands, hiding his expression from Steve. 
“I can go if you want.” He doesn’t want to, but seeing Eddie struggling to face this is enough to push him away. 
Eddie shakes his head, pulling himself out of his hands and chugging the rest of the coffee. “No, no. As much as I hate it, I said what I said and I’m sure you have questions. I would rather get it over with than prolong the inevitable. I’m going to go get changed, and then we’ll. Fuck, we’ll talk about it.”
He gets up without looking at Steve, shutting the door to his bedroom softly behind him. Steve walks out of the kitchen, running his hands through his hair. Eddie remembers what he said, and it sounds like he means it. Disbelief fills Steve, unable to even think that is the truth. He crosses his arms, trying to not pace around the room waiting for Eddie to come out. 
When he does, he walks back to the living room, nervously playing with a piece of his hair. “So,” he says, looking at Steve.
“So.”
“Um. So I heard the last part of the conversation you had with Robin that morning,” Eddie starts.
Steve nods. “Yeah, you said that.”
Eddie crosses his arms. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, just happened. Thin walls and all. I-I want you to know that I don’t have a problem with it. I’m sorry that you didn’t get to tell me on your own terms, but you didn’t know I was gay, which I am by the way, so I understand how scary that has been for you.”
“Thank you. For the apology and for telling me.”
“I was going to tell you eventually, just didn’t know when to say it.”
Steve clears his throat. “How much exactly did you hear?”
“That you haven’t felt like this in a while. Then Robin asked if you were sure that he didn’t like you back, which revealed that you like guys and that you were sure he didn’t. Which is stupid by the way, whoever you like is dumb for not liking you back.”
The irony in that statement almost makes Steve smile. “You said that too. More detailed though.”
“Yeah,” Eddie’s jaw clenches. “Yeah, I know. Just so I know, you don’t have to say, but do you still like, you know?”
“Yeah, I still like girls. I like both. Don’t really know what it means though.”
“That’s ok. You can always figure out if you want to label that later but-.” Eddie breaks eye contact with Steve again. “Did you hear what I said right before I hung up?”
How could Steve not, those words have been floating around his head all night. “Yes, I did.”
“Fuck,” Eddie exhales, hiding his face in his hands again and walking in a circle. “So you know.”
“Know what, Eddie?” As much as he would love to give Eddie a break, he needs to hear the words in order to actually believe them. 
Eddie faces him again, arms falling to his sides. He looks defeated, upset, opening his mouth up and closing it again. Until he says, “That I like you.”
“You like me,” Steve says, breath punched out of his lungs. 
“That is what I said,” Eddie nods. 
Steve walks over to Eddie and grabs him by the arms. “You, Eddie Munson, like me, Steve Harrington?”
“Yes, Steve, I do.”
He needs to hear it, craves to hear it again and again until his brain chooses to believe it. “Really. You really like me?” 
“Yes,” Eddie says annoyed. “How many times do I have to tell you? If you have a problem with it just tell me and I’ll piss off and-”
Eddie can’t finish his sentence before Steve lets himself make a stupid decision, finally doing what he wants and kisses him. Grabbing Eddie’s head with both hands without thinking and pulls him in, pressing their lips together awkwardly as Eddie is still talking. Eddie’s surprised at first, but quickly starts to kiss back. Wrapping an arm around Steve’s back and cupping his cheek with the other. 
They break before coming back together again, Steve’s hands sliding back into Eddie’s hair. He can’t believe that it’s really happening, that this is something that’s even real. The flutter in his heart is the only thing reminding him that he’s still awake. That this isn’t some dream but reality. 
He thinks that it’s stupid that he wasted so much time being scared about this. That he almost walked away before he knocked, risking leaving this behind. Sure he’s scared. These feelings he has for Eddie are real and they go deep. Deeper feelings than he’s had with any of his other first kisses. But right now, that doesn’t matter. Right now, Eddie’s kissing him back, showing him he wants this too. That he’s as happy that Steve kissed him as Steve is. 
Steve’s scared, a part of him always will be. There’s always the chance that this won’t work out, that he’ll end up shattered again. But right now, that doesn’t matter. Some risks are worth taking when they make you feel like this. 
Eddie breaks the kiss, pressing his forehead against Steve’s. When he opens his eyes, the first thing Steve sees is Eddie’s smile, and he can’t help but smile back. 
“So,” Steve starts, giggling. “You are the guy that I like, if you couldn’t tell.”
Eddie laughs. “I sure hope I was. You don’t kiss people like that if you don’t like them. At least I hope not.”
“I do though,” Steve says, running his thumb across Eddie’s cheek, because he can. “I really do like you.”
“Well good. Cause I really like you, Steve.” Eddie kisses him again, shorter this time, but sweeter. “I was so scared that I ruined everything last night.” 
Steve shakes his head. “You didn’t. Honestly, if you hadn’t called, this probably wouldn’t have happened. I was so scared that you would have found out and that would have ruined it.”
“It wouldn’t have. What I said was right, whoever you liked would have been stupid for not liking you back. And I’m a lot of things but apparently stupid isn’t one of them.” 
“No, you’re not.” Steve kisses him again, bringing him as close as possible. 
He’s happy, the worries and stresses evaporated as if they were never there. All that is left is him and Eddie, together. It doesn’t matter what they are, or what they’re going to be. Not right now at least. All that matters is that he’s here. He might not have been the one to say it first, but who cares? Eddie likes him back, and Steve told him he likes him too. Something so simple but so hard at the same time. 
But more importantly, this doesn’t feel wrong to him anymore, it feels like the most right thing he’s ever done.
full will be on ao3 later tonight Thanks to all of you who followed along, hope you enjoyed the story. This was my first time doing a story that was posted weekly on tumblr and not ao3 and I really enjoyed it. I will definitely be doing this a lot more. Thank you once again to @imfinereallyy for the post that inspired this piece.
Tag list: tag list: @imfinereallyy @estrellami-1 @paintsplatteredandimperfect @overhillunderhill @renaissan-vvitch @ashwagandalf @sirsnacksalot @lorelei724 @emly03 @super-cosmic-library @rozzieroos @dolphincliffs @henderdads @abyssal808 @evergreenprose @demolvr @steddiehyperfixation @stedumpsterfire @ent-is-indecisive @steddierthings @makeadealwithdean @kas-eddie-munson @extra-transitional @lunaticmarunatic @steveharringtonmilf @cardboardqueen @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @panicatthediaz @ellietheasexylibrarian @hallucinatedjosten @awkwardgravity1 @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @its-a-me-a-morgan @messrs-weasley @dreamlandforever @stevesbipanic @inmoonywetrust @sani-86 @aellafreya @lorelei724 @punkprettyboyprincess @stoopidstrwbrry @martinskis-lydias @a-gae-af-racoon @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @goodolefashionedloverboi @genderless-spoon
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ccasey0 · 1 month
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alright, this isn’t related to HBT at all, but I like it too much not to share. so, say hello to the Spirit Au!!
starting with Casey, The Spirit of the Night.
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I’ve got more drawings of him since he’s my fav to draw. Now for his lore!!
Casey lived his whole life in service of The Celestial in the Spirit Tree. He loved Celestial, and devoted his everything to Them. The Celestial is the master of the spirits. The God of gods. The highest of high. He is the one who creates spirits. And Casey was soon to become one. Everyone knows that Celestial was planning on appointing spirits for the Day and the Night. And Casey and his twin were the top options. They were closer than ever. They were never apart. They did everything together. But Casey was the one who worked hardest to earn Celestial’s approval. He worked so hard to be chosen for the spirit of the Day. The most important. The sun, the light, the bringer of life and happiness. But when the time came, and Celestial was choosing who would be which spirit, all that work went to waste. It was all for nothing. Because they chose Dellta. They chose her over him. She never did anything to deserve that. Of course Casey loved his twin. But Dellta was the one who relaxed all day. Played in favor of working. Acted like everything was fine and that they had all they could ever want. But Celestial chose her anyway. Why? Why not him? After everything he did for them, all the hard work, all the hours of labor, all the time he spent trying to please them. Was it all for nothing? His sister was overjoyed, but all Casey could feel was anger and despair. And then Celestial made him the spirit of the Night. The moon, the darkness, the bringer of death and sorrow. The least liked. Casey knew that some people down on earth worshiped the moon, but those people were the poor and the weak. The smallest of villages. And it wasn’t even power that Casey wanted. It was just that he had done everything he could for Celestial, only for them to completely disregard him. He hates that. He hates Celestial. He might have even hated Dellta and her joyful smile at that moment.
Also Casey Sketches!!
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Oke, now for Dellta! I only have one drawing of her for now, but I definitely want to draw her some more.
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Lore time!!!
Dellta had always been the happier of the twins. She played more with the other immortals and spirits while her brother worked to please the Celestial. She knew how important Celestial was, but she didn’t see why Casey had to put all his time towards making them favor him. And she never expected to be chosen for the spirit of the Day. Celestial just gave the role to her. Which meant she had somehow become his favorite. After that, she started doing just what her brother had been doing. Following the Celestial around in her free time and doing things for them to make their view of her even better. She also loved being worshipped. She really enjoyed all the offerings and gifts she received from the humans. And she loved making them all super excited when she sent them a little sign or a gift in return. She was certainly more enthusiastic about being worshipped by the mortals than her brother. She guessed that he just didn’t like the fact that all their offerings were either sacrifices or charms or the occasional food basket. Plus, he had become much quieter and distant ever since the ceremony. Dellta didn’t know why. He had become a spirit, just like he wanted. Was he hoping for something else. She didn’t know. But whenever she asked, he avoided the questions and brushed her off, pushing her further and further away. While they still did almost everything together and they were still extremely close, Casey just started to want to be alone more often and he refused to explain why. He still smiled, but not as often. He still hugged her, but they became shorter. He still loved her, and she still loved him. But he had changed. And there was nothing Dellta could do about it. She couldn’t figure out why he had become like this, he just had. But she stopped caring after a while. She just started putting her attention towards her worshippers when Casey didn’t want to talk to her.
I don’t have any extra drawings of Dellta, but I have a picture of the mountain!
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The giant tree in the middle is the Spirit Tree, which serves as the bridge between the earth and the sky. The mountain is famous for being the largest and most spiritual mountain because that’s where the immortals all gather. Also, the city shown is the Foot Clan. They worship the Spirit of the Day, aka Dellta. Although they get a few things wrong about her. Like how they think that Dellta and Casey are the “Lovers of the Sky”. Casey is worshipped by the Hamato clan, which is in the other side of the mountain. Their village is much smaller and poorer than the Foot, but they know more about the spirits and have connections with a few of them. The Hamato Clan mains are The turtles(but in older form, around 20-23), Splinter(the elder/leader of the village and the most connected with the spirits), usagi(because I can), and april(one of the few humans in the hamato village), and Junior(my version Casey Jones in the au. i just called him Junior since two Caseys would be confusing. also one of the few humans in the hamato village.). The hamato clan is also the only village that is home to mostly yokai and a few humans, while the foot only consist of humans. Also in this Au the turtles aren’t the sons of splinter, just his pupils. They are also all yokai, including splinter. The hamato clan mostly gives blood sacrifices of normal animals and sometimes bowls of blood from people cutting their hands and dropping some of their blood into the bowl since the Night Spirit is supposed to be closely connected to death. Although they also have plenty of shrines with statues and a TON of charms. Charms are a very big thing for the hamato, and they are supposed to hold prayers. Casey is technically supposed to collect the charms at the end of the week during the night and turn the prayers into stars for the people who made them, but he doesn’t like going so close to the village. Also because when he first went down there he found that they had left a dead sheep for him and he hated it. So, for fear he might find more dead things, he didn’t go back there again. Sometimes he will find small charms hung up all over trees that have mushrooms on them and he absolutely loves them. Although he’ll never admit it and he leaves the charms there. Because of this, the hamato people have begun to lose faith in splinter because he is the one constantly telling them to believe in the Night Spirit. Even the turtles have started questioning the spirits, especially donnie who was already skeptical in the first place. not mikey though. he still believes just as much as Splinter. The foot clan, however, all are VERY serious about their faith in the spirits. they have a huge temple dedicated purely for the Day Spirit, and also worship some other spirits too. even the Night Spirit. although Casey doesn't like them either since they also give blood sacrifices, with no charms too! Dellta, on the other hand, loves to go down and see the humans in the Foot. She'd always been fond of sparring, so when she first saw that they Foot were very centered around fighting she was ecstatic and loved watching them train in the grounds in the center of the city. although she had to stay hidden the whole time since she was only supposed to show herself to the people on special events. also, the only time she went to the Hamato clan was during the total solar eclipse since that's when the twins are supposed to go to their opposite villages and use magic to put their symbol on the banners of their opposite representation(sun on the moon banner, moon on the sun banner for example).
anyways, I hope you like this! if you can't tell, this will be mostly centered around the Hamato Clan and Casey. i hope to be able to make more art of this cause it is SO. MUCH. FUN. to draw these guys and build more of the story. i've already got so many ideas for angst floating around in my head, as well as ideas for when Mikey meets Casey for the first time.
also this is very much inspired by Quilt Au by @cokoweee :)
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Anyone wanna send eachother homestuck tiktoks?
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anomaly-vee · 1 month
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listen the gang was misled by a child with relations to the hags once already, istg mishka
i love you but i do not at all trust you
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confetti-critter · 8 months
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I'm at work rn every1 like my cloutfit (clown outfit)
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messersmoonss · 1 year
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what if i said pandora died trying to create some kind of cure for inferi.
I know it’s not cannon that anyone knows about Reg, but i feel like they have this link, this bond, and she can feel that Reg isn’t fully gone.
She looses herself in her research, and never gives up, just as she always has done. I feel like she was always being told she could do incredible things with her talents, and she always tried.
But she quickly began to feel like she’ll never live up to them when she realises she can’t help Regulus. She’s just proving everyone wrong. Letting them all down. Failing to bring Regulus back. And that breaks her. Breaks her so much, that she messes up.
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xehanortsreport · 1 year
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also im still #1 Okonogi Fucker, here's my witchsona enjoying watching his favorite fragments with everyone's favorite karma houdini!
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Two things: 1. Family health situation became a bit more complicated and worrisome again. Continuing to manage as everything unfolds. Thank you for the support and kindness on that front. <3
2. Finally finished the Lumos update's rough draft. It appears to be clocking in around 70k, though editing may trim it. I am so unbelievably pleased about this chapter/update, and though every word has been a journey and a struggle [with many drafts and scenes scrapped or restarted], I'm over the moon to see it reach this point. There are three to four more complex editing things to rework, then it's mostly a polish job.
With longer chapters, editing becomes more complex, but I'll be updating with percentages as I go. Thankfully, I have a bit of time this week [and a team of lovely friends writing and editing their own work alongside me in co-working sessions], so I'm excited to move through this at an efficient yet healthy pace.
I find goal setting for process work to be motivating, so here are some of mine: 1. I will start edits today after a celebratory dance about this room. [This is what the youths call "big brain energy" because it doesn't allow rust and anxiety to build on my writing muscles between sessions.] 2. I will not be pulling an all-nighter during this editing work cycle. 3. I will stop for breaks to breath outside air. 4. I will hydrate. 5. I will celebrate the little steps of progress with my writing support group and with you all here. <3
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sleepyinclusion · 2 years
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Heavyrain, you’re fired. Cutter does good enough a job nuking the boss to make it work with just foxes.
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pillowprincessvarric · 4 months
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I swear to god that green day has had this exact same "scandal" like five times now.
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liquidstar · 6 months
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If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)
At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.
Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.
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borrelia · 2 months
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if you donate one single us dollar to the unrwa, you will have donated more money than you would have by clicking that stupid arab.orb link every day for four and a half years. yes, they do actually donate money to the unrwa, but even with tens of thousands of clicks, most of that money is the baseline $90 they send every quarter. from 2023 quarter 4, half a million clicks turned into $380.57. maths out to six hundreths of one cent per click. just donate to unrwa.
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obsob · 3 months
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i am a being capable of immeasurable love and whimsy
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ardri-na-bpiteog · 2 months
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Also increasingly aware that a LOT of people "manage" getting through the 40+ hour work week by sleeping less than is healthy and relying on stimulants like coffee and energy drinks to keep them going.
For people who are unwilling or unable to do this...work really does just dominate your life. Like we really should not have to rely on unhealthy practices just to have a social life or keep on top of housework or whatever.
I know I post about this a lot but I'm so TIRED all the time and it's just so depressing that this is how we're expected to spend the one life we have.
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softichill · 5 months
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