#actually i WILL explain but i'll do it in the tags

[catenby-perineum]

Please note

I rolled out of bed to type this because it was weighing on me a bit.

I feel the need to explain this in depth but I really shouldn't have to so I'll toss a tl;dr at the end, I just feel like where I'm coming from is useful or something? I'm not sure.

I just wanted to say that over the time I've run this blog there have been some compliments I felt uneasy about. At the time I often accepted them; Even viewed them as positive things even if something felt off. But dwelling on why they felt off gave me plenty of reason to make this post.

I hold no negative feelings towards the people who offered these compliments because in each case it's been very obvious where they were coming from. Perhaps I'm too nice, but I don't feel negativity about it.

But some people seem to misunderstand what "any pronouns" means or how it interacts with their views of who they are speaking toward.

I have had tags slapped on my pics that amount to things like "#hnnnnnng I love girls/women" as they have misconstrued my acceptance of any pronouns to mean I accept others gendering me for themselves.

I do not.

I have had many people compliment and sext over my "girlcock" or "girlmusk".

I do not have these things.

I am nonbinary, I am agender, I have some fluidity in there but it's constantly bouncing between miasmas of gender rather than along the traditional binary, I am trans and happy about that- it hasn't been a fact I understood for long but I've enjoyed understanding myself more as a person than as a singular gender.

I have a cock, not a girlcock, to put it bluntly.

To put it more clearly, I feel "at home" in so many different terms- so many different titles and pronouns- because I feel myself within them. If someone calls me mistress or miss or sir or whatever I feel myself in that because all of gender feels like a part of my blurry agender identity. Effectively they are calling me by parts of my home or something poetic- I rolled out of bed for this.

But when someone points at me and declares me one thing, calling me a woman in an apparent attempt to show appreciation towards the varied body types that exist within the gender- to show respect towards trans women by what? Misgendering a nonbinary person? It feels like someone found me hot and wanted to label me so they could maintain their preferred sexual identity or something but that's an assumption and not my internal world to explore.

Gendering my body parts as if my acceptance of pronouns extends towards deciding how to label my body for me is the real kicker that has dug at me over time.

At first I took girlcock to be a rather sizeable compliment as it felt divergent from my past identity. People were taking an effort to not see me as simply a man, so that must mean we're going the right direction- I thought.

But as time has sat on it it's just remained uncomfortable and I've long since figured out why.

Pointing at me, a nonbinary agender trans person, and saying "Girl-bodypart" is still incorrect. It's still deciding for me and frankly it feels really weird being in such happy trans circles but still occasionally hearing that I'm a hot transfemme with a hot girlcock when that's not what I am. You can clearly see that's not what I am- it's in my damn name if you needed a reminder.

*sigh* I'm not even actually mad about it, I'm mildly upset I guess, but more in a disappointed and kind of saddened way.

In practice it's just made these "compliments" feel like someone saying you're the coolest ever- at the exact moment you step in a puddle in bare socks. You sure as hell don't feel cool right now and this just feels fucking off and will continue to for a while now, thanks.

TL;DR I am nonbinary and agender and trans and accept any pronouns, this does not mean you can decide I am a woman for the sake of praising me as a hot woman, this also does not mean you can gender my body for the same purpose- I will softly remind you that I do not accept others complimenting my "girlcock" as I do not have one. Thank you.

I guess in conclusion, girlcock fucking rules, trans people fucking rule, I am nonbinary and not a girl and do not have a girlcock, mine's just a cock, I'm going back to bed and love you all 💜

#ag-t

[taz-writes]

here's a hot take for today

the narrative function of sex is the same as the narrative function of fight scenes is the same as the narrative function of songs in a musical

no i will not explain

#taz talks #writing #actually i WILL explain but i'll do it in the tags #these each serve the same function within their respective appropriate genres #each one is a kind of revelation #they heighten the connection between 2+ characters and highlight relationships and feelings and needs #they are out of place in genres where they do not belong and/or as curveballs when the narrative did not provoke them from the start #but they have the same sort of emotional/dramatic build-up #talk -> sing -> dance (talk -> yell -> stab) ((talk -> flirt -> You Know)) #and they are all expressions of intense physicality and intimacy through physical gesture and interaction #they are fundamentally empty and boring if there is not a deeper purpose or drive behind them #although they can still occasionally be entertaining on their own if your audience is specifically seeking that experience out #people who do not like them will be very unhappy to encounter one where it isn't supposed to be #it is very easy to ruin the mood with poor word choice #many people have an inherent sense for terrible ones but it's often difficult or complicated to explain precisely why a bad one fails #when executed properly they are a very raw and intimate expression of a character's most fundamental needs and desires #the fluff is stripped away and there is nothing left but a series of needs. conflicting or cooperating. #and even when you're lying during one it's still a form of truth #none of these things are remotely necessary to tell a powerful or compelling story but if you're going to use them you need to do it right #also all 3 of these things are difficult if not impossible to write if you are not both interested in them and personally invested #this post brought to you by me trying to write smut about my dnd characters and failing because i generally hate /reading/ smut #so i have none of the vocabulary or instinct for it that i do for. say. graphic violence (or lyrical poetry)

[moodlesmain]

Hi. Look at this.

I just spent two days straight making a digital conspiracy board trying to piece together my favourite genre that isn't really a genre and more just a very particular niche which doesn't really have a name.

If you want to look I reccomend downloading and zooming in on the image to read everything LMAO, I want to try and convert it to a page on my neocities at some point so its easier to view but for now you guys just get a big ol' jpeg. You're welcome :)

#THIS IS ALL ABOUT ME TRYING TO LIKE BREAK DOWN A SUB-GENRE I'VE NOTICED like thats the main thing i'm trying to do here #its so broad but also so specific and trying to explain it is hard #so i made this #welcome to my twisted mind etc #just realised i forgot to include Long Exposure :( #i'm actually posting this a day later cause it was like 4am when i finished this #gravity falls #psychonauts #coraline #paranorman #sequel post to my one from a few days ago which got way more notes than i expected asedrjthgdrf??? #this is a wip also i still wanna edit things and add things later #need to improve my silly lil' sticker labelling system #mystery kids #should i tag a few more of the things i included? at least the bigger things???? uhh #i'll tag #scooby doo #at the very least since i dedicated a whole corner to them #fandom conspiracy board #is that a thing is this a thing people normally do #idk #it's satisfying though i like it #enrichment for me :)

[featherf4lling]

build//burn -> ren helps build the fire while martyn burns a marshmallow

HIII i'm back. something quick and cute for today. didn't spend as much time on it as i did the past two but i still think its cute anyway so here. hands u this. maybe ill go back and redo it another day

#treebarkweek #treebarkweek2024 #treebark #trafficshipping #<- not explicitly shipping but leaving these tags anyway #renchanting duo #inthelittlewood #rendog #no i cannot explain my artistic choice to give martyn flip flops. i just really didn't want to draw actual shoes. forgive me #i almost did the last life tower thing but i already saw so many people doing it #i'll get back to that one

[nerevar-quote-and-star]

Dangerously close to plotting a real Skyrim/Lord of the Rings crossover for after Keeping Count because my secret desire for Leara/Glorfindel has reared its head again

Shhh Don't question it.

#look look now i must explain #the explanation is that leara simply works well with literally every male character I like at least for the most part #anyway #it'd be funny #i wish i could write a leara/astarion fic but i do NOT understand d&d at all alas #I understand lotr/silm on a crazy level so i guess sunshine hero elf it is #this is fine actually #actually what i really need to do is edit and finish my funny Skyrim/hobbit crack fic but that's a ten year old project #no really #I do NOT KNOW i am just having thoughts and i'm sharing them on my blog because it's mine and I can #also i was in the glorfindel/ofc tag on ao3 like five minutes ago and it looks empty and sad #so Leara can fix it #one day there will be more leara ships than there are for hermione granger jk maybe #i should make a list #I am talking out of my hair it is unlikely that i'll ever do anything the fact that keeping count even exists is a bloody miracle #mod post #oc: leara roseblade

[b4kuch1n]

fuck it sk8 sketches from da sketchbook. get sk8ed idiot

#sk8 the infinity #kyan reki #hasegawa langa #renga #sure whatever. tagging ship is probably easier than explaining what the fucks up with these two in my head #hi. I watched sk8 with my friend cosme a while ago. I actually dont care about the allegations that much I just got #blasted with teenage years flashback. and now I need reki to have everything on earth and be well #these have been around for like a week lol Ive just been debating posting them to tumblr. bc like. Im not finishing these lol #hesitant to call sk8 ''therapeutic'' but boy oh boy. does it make me confront some stuff. yes a sport anime leave me alone!!! #its just. I think I was this way about raz too actually. listen I have History with Stuff. I'm allowed ok? I'm totally allowed #u can See it in some of these doodles actually. this fuckign anime got me so unwell #hey. if ur a fellow adhd potentials-havers out there. ur a real one. thanks for still hangin out doin what u love/ur best #if u were an 'if u wanna do art u have to be excellent and high-art at it otherwise it means nothing' kid. I am holding ur hand #I'll be normal now I prommy (lying) #well. what I'll be doing now is taking a nap. maybe. gods my schedule backslid like four hours again #eh whatever. I go to bed anyway. got my portion of the day done and tomorrow I go buy new knife #hope someone come give me a new table top and lower the whole thing a bit soon. so I can stop sitting like Im in a shopping cart #have a good night lads. have fun. its imperative

[front-facing-pokemon]

#WOOOOAAHHH THEY'RE TRANSPARENT!! I THOUGHT REGIICE WAS BLUE BUT LIKE #i guess it makes sense that they're actually transparent! 'cuz! they're made of ice! i kinda wish they were blue here since that's like #more iconic and i feel like they'd be more recognizable if they were transparent but i guess this ALSO looks cool #and no‚ the stuff in there is not‚ like. its brain or whatever. it's just FULLY transparent and you can see through to my desktop wallpaper #and that's what's showing through its head. which is like cool but i'm worried makes this guy a little bit less visually distinct #actually yeah it kinda does LEMME redo this one but with a blank background and see if it looks any better #yyyeeeeaaahh okay this helps a bit. more visual clarity. i'll replace it with the one where you Can't see my desktop wallpaper #i might leave that version under the cut actually. but i'd have to add some text to the post which i generally don't like doing. just to #explain what it is. cuz not everyone is gonna read these tags #i'll just. leave it the way it is. in two weeks i'll just hope i remember what wallpaper i had applied when i took the original image #cuz i have it set to change every night through a set list of images that i update whenever i find a new image i like that's roughly #the resolution of my monitor. i dunno if anyone else does this #most irrelevant tags ever #regice #thanks for the catch on the spelling nidoskull

[hamartia-grander]

Hi, just wanted to ask a honest question because I've seen you post about it a few times and I genuinely don't understand where you're coming from when you say this. How is remake Leon a misogynist?

Most recently I saw you point out him calling Ada heartless, but I don't see how that's him being sexist. He says that in response to her telling him information on where to find Ashley, having previously told him to leave her behind (to presumably die or worse), and I don't think its misogynistic for him to make a jab at her for that. Especially because Leon's big motivation is saving people, of course he wouldn't be a huge fan of anyone telling him to intentionally leave someone to die if he's able to save them. (This is also not to say Ada's a bad person for suggesting that, I love Ada and her character but I also understand why Leon would be upset by such a thing)

If there's anything else in the remakes that I've missed you point out I'm curious to what else makes him misogynistic because I just don't see it.

Also like a sidenote I guess almost all of Leon's misogynistic lines are from original re4 but Luis also has lines like this, so I don't understand why he gets to be distinguished between versions and Leon doesn't when you talk about their characters.

"honest question" and yet, you seem to have already formulated an idea of my answer (and an opinion of me) based off of one post where I casually mentioned it, and you decided to look no further before getting defensive about it. Are you even asking? Do you even care to learn? Or will you just ignore everything I say? And asking anonymously is very funny to me. Literally who are you.

I talked about it here, kinda joked about it here, and I very thoroughly detailed it here, as well as reiterated in the comments. I'm so tired of repeating myself. It's 1am now bc I took the time to find these posts for you lol. Maybe read them before you try attacking a straw man.

But to the Luis point? I absolutely do separate og RE4 Leon and remake Leon… Like literally my entire POINT is that no, remake Leon is still sexist, just differently, and here is why… I really don't understand how you came to this conclusion lmao.

The main idea is, Capcom thinks they've written out Leon's misogyny; but because Capcom itself is a very bigoted company, they perpetrate misogyny in everything they make and they don't even realise it! They genuinely think the way they wrote remake Leon absolves him from the misogyny when it doesn't, it just re-contextualises it in a way that Capcom deems palatable. They still see Ada as an extension of Leon! They still see Ada's worth revolving solely around how Leon feels in response to her actions. It's ridiculous. And the way Leon is written to treat her, the lines he's given towards her, reflect this attitude, and becomes misogynistic when he treats a male character who has done worse than Ada right in front of Leon with respect and empathy.

#begging people to stop and think and actually analyse things before getting defensive. Why do I have to keep doing the work it's exhausting #Like I'll keep doing it but damn. #Why does someone suggesting that your fave has misogynistic context make you upset? #Why are you defensive over that rather than over how he treats women? #I notice these things because I pay attention to the female characters and I value them equally as characters #Maybe if you valued Ada more and paid attention to her as a character and how Leon treats her versus how he treats Krauser #you'd see Leon's unwarranted cruelty towards her is misogynistic because of these differences in his behaviour #Maybe also stop seeing Leon as someone who can do no wrong and have no flaws when you expect the same of Ada fans. #etc etc #not tagging anything but I hope to God people stop asking me to explain. PAY ATTENTION.

[princekirijo]

POINTS ‼️‼️NEW RIKU ICON‼️ REAL‼️ GRAHHHHH HE LOOKS AWESOME 🔥🔥🔥

Ahh thank you Misty :3c

Here is the uh full icon for those who want to see it properly 👉👈

He's my silly little goose :3 my funny boy

Also uhm a bonus and a little lore drop I'd planning to make for a while undercut ehe

Tada this is Riku's actual eye colour! Much similar to Mitsuru's :3 He wears eye contacts throughout a lot of Captain AU's story and if you ask him why he will give you a different answer every time ehe

#asks #misty-wisp #riku kirijo #oc tag #i cant believe im doing this lmao #but if im gonna do it ill do it scared #but tada riku's official look!! #well aside from teh outfit i'll explain that in a bit #but i can safely say i am 100% happy with this design now :3c #his outfit is kinda what im thinking he'd wear in the catt au! he refuses to wear the actual gekkoukan uniform so hes gonna wear the varsit #jacket instead! <- 100% my personal bias for the jacket i own it and its the most comfortable thing i own #and the ring has lore but eh i wont go into it now #i was gonna post the full doodle page but u know what baby steps #and yeah lmaooo riku actually has brown eyes surprise #the actual reason for the contacts thing is because i couldn't pick between the two eye colours i really like both #but brown eyes is more realistic so its his true look ehe #and uhm yeah idk what i was doing with the expression but nico pointed out it looks like one of yukari's sprites LMAO #unintentional on my part but he is a mama's boy #depnding on how this goes ill post the rest of the doodles #but wow can u guys believe the last time i posted proper art was 2021 #not including the lil character bio sheet i did in 2022 that was a lil doodle #but ehm nico said my arts improved and my gf is always praising my art so im uhm gonna share #i need a new art tag tbfh

[nerosdayinanime]

"Im worried what people would think of you then, that you're just a personal whore or something- i don't want to ruin your reputation.."

"Are you kidding? 'My dick was so good i got promoted-' Thats the biggest flex i can think of!"

"Well, you're certaintly enthusiastic about this."

#ive been thinking of the au from @planethoneybee's tags in that writing prompts post #on the topic of giyuu wanting sabito to have political power in case something happens or someone tries to pull shit- #him & shinobu debating the pros and cons of giving him title of concubine before giyuu brings up the social aspect #so shino calls sab in to get his thoughts on the matter directly and it made me laugh #another bit w sanemi- theyre at a meeting talking abt finances and theyre talking of cutting sanemi's beetle funding- #G: i can pay for it /Sane: what? /G: keep as much funding to the project as possible- i'll finance the rest of it out of my #own allowance. that works doesnt it? /Shino: i suppose. ..but you'd do that for beetles? /G: i see importance in it. /Shino: very well- #sanemi doesnt thank him or even mention it but he definitly looks at giyuu differently after that- he used his own shit to keep #the project going full blast? damn. he did that for sanemi's beetles. man. #somethn somethn giyuu bringing up the idea for shinobu to have a personal guard(/helper) as well #shinobu 'i know what you are' @ giyuu before he hurriedly explains he doesnt mean get a side hoe hes genuinely just #offering to find her a trusted guard/helper whos sole purpose is to do errands n shit specifically for her 'oh! that sounds nice actually' #'sab has someone in mind for you- says shes one of the best in the forces and a pleasant personality' 'ill see that for myself first' #'okay [thumbs up]' #im imaginging a mix between european kingdoms & east asian/chinese/japanese empires except i dont know shit about either #only thing i vaguely know is theres advisors & like sub-royalty & in traditional japanese more (/complex) layers of clothing = rich/royal #the 'sub royalty' has a name im p sure. i forgor. fuckiinnn. #nope its just not there. oh well. giyuu w the fingerless sleeve-gloves my FUCKING beloved #also vague thought of sabito & mitsuri wearing helmets that utilize their pink hair as fuckin. yk the european knights #w the stupid ponytail thing/romans w the gold helm/red mohawk thing. somethn like that #they wouldnt wear like full Heavy Armor like knights do their fighting styles & w the close-quarters they wouldnt need it #but like for Show at Fancy Pantsy Time theyd dress up similarly #loserboy giyuu posting #loverboy sabito posting #sabigiyuu #of all the shit i have for this au THATS the scene that gets front page. dick joke funniee #(in case its not clear text goes Giyuu-Sabito-Shinobu talking)

[kays-artstuff]

This is more for me than anything else but i had an epiphany.

#that moment when #you explain something you do to someone and realise it's not actually healthy #it's only wen you explain it tat the pieces come together and you've actually connected the dots #and you're internally like “damn.” #art #sorry for the tags #comic sketch #ms paint #doodle #it's ok i'll bring it up with my therapist i just thought this doodle was funny enough to post

[muninnhuginn]

having to make myself just pull back a second and go for "simplest explanation that fits all the facts and isn't accidentally inferring beyond the facts we do have".

#I tend to not want to eliminate possibilities so long as there's even a small chance of them happening and I get why #but at the same time I've ended up doubting things that I think in retrospect I should have taken at face value. #so being sus of ltx beyond the point at which it was clear she wasn't some secret mastermind and wondering if chen bin was even possessed. #and I've ended up making assumptions without realising we're not actually shown it (re: presuming photo possession allowed control) #I think it's mainly just frustrating because in retrospect I can see the clues all lining up. it's not that it wasn't fair play. #the pieces were all there. #link click #link click spoilers #(for the tags :V) #And I'll be honest. Usually I just keep theorising to myself unless I'm super certain or enough other people think similarly #because sometimes I'm on point and can't explain why and other times I trust hunches and don't realise that's what I'm doing so get confuse #when suddenly a piece of media seems to 'contradict' itself. when it's actually just contradicting what I thought I'd inferred #just. taking a step back and trying to apply the simplest explanation that fits. applying common sense as to what fits within genre etc. #I feel really weird about meta-gaming theorising using stuff like current pacing etc but at the same time it's still data that's available #and as long as it's not stuff like idk an interview giving it all away I don't think it's necessarily 'cheating'? #(may delete later idk)

[imwritesometimes]

wouldn't it be funny if I could write again lollollol........

#got a very sweet comment on a fic today and I was like oh my god. oh my goddddddd. ppl *still* like my stuff. #ppl still like my silly little stupid little stuff that I had stupid silly fin working on & it's dumb and silly but I shared it! #and ppl like it! #and I'm like not pushing myself anymore. like before I was kinda trying to force shit to happen #like sitting in bed with an open notebook/laptop like CREATE BITCH! #and I'm not doing that anymore lol and being on my meds has really made me feel SO much better #but also like I just don't.... have any ideas anymore. can't rotate blorbo like a rotisserie chicken anymore #I lay down to go to sleep now and because my body is not operating under severe extreme toxic anxiety levels anymore #I just fckn fall asleep. like I'm OUT. good night. sleepin. snoozin. zonked. 7+ hours. #no more blorbo thoughts at the end of the day I'm TIRED and my brain FINALLY shuts off #I hope one day I'll write again. I had so much fun with it. I have had a couple Thoughts #since I have been on my meds #but they're nothing more than a few quick sentences scrawled in a notebook. #it's like I'm doing so much other stuff and having fun in other ways and SLEEPING FINLALLY SWEET GOD ALMIGHTY #there's just like zero processing left for original blorbo ideas #this doesn't make sense and I bet you were all relieved cause I haven't ranted in tags in like months but hahaha #🤡 I STAY HONKIN'!!!! 🤡 #(I'm actually really in a really good place mentally rn I promise like the best I've felt in years I'm just ahhh!! tonight lol) #erin explains it all

[4arconinoma]

Ok so I haven't finished it yet But I'd like to ramble just a little about some thoughts on Marble Hornets so far that being: 1. WAY sadder than I had ever expected it to be 2. I find it really entertaining how the protagonist is honestly kind of terrible

#txt #By that I mean to say that well Im not sure how much of a consensus this opinion is but as I see it Im just honestly surprised at the #lengths that Jay goes to investigate. and you know there's conviction and all but god DAMN. Ill avoid spoilers till I have a proper tag but #Suffice to say i didnt expect him to go from trespassing to . Psychological manipulation...? Im 90% sure he just re-ruined this guy's life? #And this isnt a complaint. On the contrary i really appreciate it because I think hes a really interesting protag #Usually something like MH would bore me seeing as a lot of it is just walking with a camera while being kind of clueless? #But i feel so invested in the characters that im actually always eager to find out what will happen. I think theyve pulled off tension so #well this entire time. Its really thrilling to watch this #Anyways when it comes to the first point Im not even going to try and explain the emotions that I feel towards Tim Wright. #You can figure that out on your own. I can assure you that NONE are normal and it is very DIRE. thats all i'll say on that #Lastly Im honestly a little scared to finish it. i think i only have some 20 entries left but I know for a fact things will get bad #and im Scared ;((( so Im putting it off and I'll do it in a few days so I can get ready Ok. if Tim dies I kill myself in front of everybody #uhhmmm autism over sorry byeee [skitters away

[shoutsindwarvish]

there are two wolves inside me

#well-done autistic character #one of the main characters no less! with a character arc unrelated to his autism! #almost entire cast is poc #specifically give romans an american accent (interesting choice that i particularly enjoy) #all characters are deadpan snarkers and majority are delightful disasters #simon peter is blorbo #judas is baby #andrew is doing his best #third season especially does a great job setting up plots that are seemingly unrelated and bringing them all together #and it's actually the exception rather than the rule that i feel dallas (the creator) looking in the camera #and reminding me that it's made from an evangelical lens #(at least imho) #and i can be like 'i pretend i do not see it' #(probably will be able to do that less and less the closer we get to the passion but i'm probably going to stick around until the end) #anyway i might post some memes so please don't judge me my friends #i'll tag them accordingly #my posts #i make me laugh #you might ask why i started in the first place and the answer is that bible adaptations are my guilty pleasure #(i've explained why in a different post) #and this one went from ironic to unironic

[hermit-scribe-vibe]

him.......

#one piece #satyr au #monkey d. luffy #well. actually. #nika #i'm not going to explain just enjoy Him #j.art #one piece art #i have another one but it's uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. lol. #it needs tags this one doesn't #maybe i'll post it maybe not #my art style is doing something interesting lately and i'm content to just let it happen honestly #opart