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lunarspew · 1 month

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Hiii, I really admire your writing and I was wondering: What's your usual drafting process? I have my own, (which i will admit, is somewhat nightmarish) (Seen below (text color has no meaning)) Though I'm wondering how you usually draft your own writings?

How long do you usually spend on a "first draft" as well?

Oh my gosh first off - THANK U?! That’s so nice of you to say omg

Secondly: WOAH. I can’t say anything ‘cus my files are also a mess but that’s also a rly cool layout.

Thirdly: I have no idea what I’m doing, but I’ll do my best to explain

This got away from me. TLDR:

How I usually draft: Breaking down from big to small. Chapter outline to scene outlines to fleshing out scenes etc etc. Big to small.

How Long It takes: For my first draft, if I’m in a good mood/know where I’m going, I can get a chapter’s first draft (think rough ‘they did this and then they argued about this’ between actual writing) done in a couple of 20 minute writing sprints.

4 scenes would equal 80 minutes, done over a period of days. After that I usually spend like, a few weeks to a month editing over and over until I like it.

Now for the long shit. I ramble, I’m so sorry, I am not clear headed and that’s why It takes me so long to Edit/Publish lmao.

TA and BB are the first fics I’ve ever like. Decided that they were going to be Long and that I Really Want To Finish. I used to just write without knowing where I’m going, and that always ends with me abandoning things. So THIS TIME, I tried smth different.

The way I’ve done it so far (that has worked) has been:

Initial idea >

short desc. Of scenes that are driving me to write this in the first place / dialogue ideas i have >

rough bare bones outline start to finish >

Take a story beat template I like/fits and use that to flesh things out >

story beats >

draft scene by scene for chapters >

flesh out the rough scenes >

keep editing until i like it.

That. is the ideal way it would happen. It does not happen that way, lol.

This for an example is my first attempt at TA. Only a few lines of it made it to chapter one/i changed tenses and rewrite the whole thing. I haven't opened this file in a year or two and have moved everything to a new scrivener file since then.

For TA and BB I used Take Off Your Pants by Libbie Hawker for my initial outline.

I had it as a library book at the time and transcribed the outline process for it so I could come back and refer to it later. I’ll link my google docs here for that, (sorry about the shitty mouse drawing), though I do recommend reading the book.

Sorry, Rambling.

For TA and BB, I outlined it using that. TA I left a lot more loose / there are parts I don’t know how it’s going to go chapter by chapter.

For BB, that’s completely outlined, every chapter.

The idea is to go Big > Medium > Small.

After the broad strokes outline, I go to chapter by chapter outline. Bare bones, just a few paragraphs.

Then I break that chapter into scenes.

For that, I’ve used a couple of different things. Usually I make sure to note character goals.

Most Recently I read 5,000 Words Per Hour and then Lifelong Writing Habit, both by Christ Fox. Those were more about habits, but I liked how he broke down the ‘scene summaries’.

For each scene I break down I usually fill this out:

Characters: (who will be here, even if only minor)

Location: (where this happens. I try to keep it to one location per scene)

Major Action: (what happens. This part gets long, it’s where I summarize what happens in the scene)

Goal: (what I want to happen. Either I want info to be given to readers, or I need to move someone from point A to point B)

End: (how the scene ends/where it breaks off for new scene. Where characters are by this point.)

Emotions: (Emotions I want to get across/focus on during writing.)

Then I do a 20 minute Writing Sprint where I just word vomit that scene. I don’t let myself edit or press backspace (HARD!!!) and that’s my Draft 1 for that scene.

Usually that’s about 1k words. I know I’m an overwriter so I can kinda guess how long the scene will be once it’s fleshed out.

It goes from This kinda stuff (spoilers for chapter 6 of TA)

This is my draft 1/first ‘serious’ write thru. I’m fine sharing screenshots cus most likely it will end up very different by the time I publish it.

TIME wise? Oh god it really depends. Sometimes I get it down right the first few times. Others…

Oogh.

I have a checklist I try to go through. Once I sort of get what I want down/solid/stop with my cuts, I go thru the list with each pass.

So like Draft 3 could be just fixing dialogue. Draft 4 would be adding ‘show don’t tell’ and reworking sentence structure.

……… i just went to take a screenshot of my ‘final edit’ list and it looks like i wrote. everything out that I do in a far more concise way at some other point. God dang.

Anyway

All that is to say, time wise, it depends!

My goal is to publish once a month. Around the middle of the month. If I’m actively working on something/make myself work on it i could get draft 2 banged out in a few days, and then I spend the next couple weeks picking at it/fixing it.

Other times, I avoid it until I get a sudden rush of inspo and write it out in one day. Again, spend a month editing it/hating it, then do one last rush job edit and post it (even if i think it’s not ‘perfect’ yet) and run away from my computer.

I don’t recommend doing it like this. I’m doing a mix of ‘serious’ writing habits (schedules, deadlines) and ‘i just write for fun’. And it’s. Not great.

I’m sure it’ll get streamlined eventually/the more I write since I’m new to like. Publishing long form stuff. But yeah. Sobs.

SORRY FOR RAMBLING AUGH. I hope this makes sense. As I said I'm not clearheaded/have a loto f brain fog so. yeagh.

I forget to write things down so most of my 'planning; is just floating around in my head until I remember it last second and have to scramble to put it back in/move it around my drafts lol.

#txt #TA #BB #this is really long and got out of hand #just a total ramble so sorry im super tired kaldfjhkasdjkl #i hope this makes sense #bleedingbonemarrow #writing #asks #TA spoilers #Reed #well #reed mention #I call pov chara Reed just cus i like writing that more than 'you' every time

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syrena-del-mar · 4 months

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The Nine Circles of Hell: Dead Friend Forever, Episode 7

First, a trigger warning: I'll be discussing themes of revenge porn, grooming, statutory rape, sexual coercion.

I'm going to discuss this episode with as much upmost care as I can, due to the sheer amount of sensitive material that came out of this week's episode I will also not being using any explicit scene screen captures from this episode. If there's anything you'd like to me to take out or want a more in depth conversation, feel free to use either of my message boxes.

Last week I said DFF had more to offer than just being a campy 90s slasher remake. While I first thought we were already in the depths of hell, thematically, with Non getting beaten by the mafia, I didn't expect this week's episode to somehow double that pain. But here we are. I was lulled into false security with the 5 minute montage of getting to know what Phee and Non's relationship was like. I should have remembered that I'm definitely watching the wrong genre when I expected more of those moments.

Non and Phee

This episode really continues and expands the idea that humans are not these clear-cut, unambiguous, good-or-bad beings that idea has now been depicted through Non and his relationship with Phee. Non has so much love to give and so much want for being loved, it's what leads to Phee in the first place, but it's also what leads to his downfall. Because Non loves so much and so hard, it's also why he wasn't ecstatic that Phee had to lie to his father and say that he was involved, just to get him out of trouble with the police. What started like a sweet date turns a bit bitter, because Non is seeing the consequences of his actions not only affect himself but also the others that he loves. It's also why he couldn't tell Phee about the sheer amount he owed Tee's uncle, because he was now well aware that if Phee found out, he would get himself involved.

Non lies and manipulates Phee, he tells him time and time again that nothing happened between him and Mr. Kreng. Non swears to Phee that he isn't lying to him and that he won't keep any secrets from him anymore. It pains him to do so, he's barely holding himself together by the end of a thread thread once he's Phee's arms and his face is hidden from Phee's view. Yet, he does. He keeps it a secret how big of a hole he has found himself in, because he doesn't want to drag Phee down with him. Non says it himself to Jin, he doesn't want to be burden, he'll figure it out himself. It's a direct parallel to the bigger issues that Non is finding himself in beyond just within the 'movie set'. He has the 300 million baht hanging over his head, his parents (in his point of view) regret having him and find that he does is bring embarrassment to the family, and now he has another adult willing to give him the 300 million baht with a fake sense of care. So he found, what he believes to be, a solution that would get rid of the 300 million baht debt and all it requires is giving up a piece of himself, but at least it won't come at a cost of burdening his parents or Phee.

In trying to protect Phee, his lies ends up costing him the one he loves the most, Phee. Now from this point on, this is all speculation, but when Phee accused Non of 'always doing this', I'm not in the camp that believes that Phee is accusing Non about being a serial cheater. I see why people are in that camp, but I initially jumped to that conclusion as well. Now, I'm more in the line that Phee is accusing of Non always feeding him lies, even after explicitly promising him that he wouldn't. After putting his neck out for him, after letting Non do things his way as long as he promised to tell him the truth, Non goes back to telling lies. Phee lashes out, and at the end of the day he's still a teenager, so he hits Non's weakest point. Just get lost and die. The very words that likely haunt Phee in the present-day, now as an adult. And Non's holds the broken bracelet, punishing himself, because he knew that there was no coming back from losing his lifeline.

Non and Mr. Kreng (Please keep my trigger warnings in mind, they will be heavily discussed in this section.)

Statutory Rape. Grooming. Coerced Sexual Relations. Nonconsensual Sex. Molestation. Sexual Assault. Sexual Abuse. Those are all words to describe the relationship that occurred between Non and Mr. Keng. Let's call exactly what it is. I think I'll lose my mind if I have to see someone another person call Non a cheater. There is no cheating when there is statutory rape.

Non is literally at the end of his rope, Mr. Keng clocked that immediately. He knew that Non was isolated, that he was completely othered by his classmates, he believes that Non has nobody else to turn to, and he knows that Non is in deep in a scam that target teens. In his eyes, he found the perfect victim.

Non is taken advantage of by a person in power, a person that he should be able to trust. Non isn't naïve, he clocked that Mr. Keng wanted something from him since the moment they first met. But he is vulnerable. He's being extorted by the mafia and he sees someone offering him the money that he needs to put an end to that. In his eyes, it was a way out, a means to an end that just cost him a piece of his soul. I truly think Non rationalized it to himself as prostituting himself, because he knew that money was never coming without a price. No matter how much Mr. Keng tried to sell it as 'brotherly' love.

But at the end of the day, it does not matter what Non believed or rationalized, because Mr. Keng was the adult in the situation. He had a duty, as a teacher, to protect Non and provide a safe classroom environment. Instead he target, manipulates, and coerces Non into having sexual relations with him. He knows the power imbalance he holds, first as a teacher and then with the 300 million baht he 'gave' him. Mr. Keng, knowing that Non's not close to his 'friends', physically isolates him. He takes him to his office that's half-lit, located in a long hallway with, seemingly, very little foot traffic. He prods at Non, asking what's been bothering him and has him visibly become emotional, before offering his care. He's a complete and utter predator, in every sense of the term.

I hope he dies a long, painful death.

Non and Jin

First and foremost, whether or not Jin was ultimately the one that posted the video does not matter. Filming a classmate being sexually assaulted is still child porn at the very least and, possibly, revenge porn (if he disseminated the video) at the worst. I was on the same boat as @respectthepetty and their take that Jin had to be the worst of them all. Like they said in that post, Jin is a coward and he even admits to it. There's nothing more cowardly than hiding behind a door, filming you supposed 'friend' getting sexually abused by your teacher, and then even considering putting up on social media for revenge because your heart is broken.

Yes, Top framed Non. Yes, Por demanded (and bullied) money from Non. Yes, Tee brought Non to the mafia. Those are all very bad things, don't get me wrong. All the physical and mental abuse they put Non through was hell. Yet, Jin was the only one aware that Non had already been seeing someone, which seemingly had upset him already. Then he sees him with Mr. Keng and instead of reporting that his alleged friend was being assaulted, he gets angry and films Non at his most vulnerable point in life. Even Fluke didn't want any part of that.

Jin takes away Non's dignity. And at the end of the day, it doesn't matter whether he uploaded it online or not, he was still the one to film, transfer that file onto his computer, and contemplate whether he was going to post it or not. At every point since he found that Non and Mr. Kreng were in that room, he rendered Non powerless. That video would have never been uploaded if it hadn't existed in the first place. With just a point of a camera and click of a button, he is revictimizing Non every. single. time. that video is opened and seen by another person.

There are no words to fully describe or explain that kind of trauma that he has subjected Non to.

Final Thoughts

This episode was nauseating. It honestly took me about two hours just to get to the end. Usually, I can watch through a show I enjoy really quickly, but this episode was so hard to digest. And that's simply due to how realistic they are approaching the subject of Non and Mr. Keng.

Barcode and Ta really are the stars of the show. I'm not saying that the other castmates aren't amazing in their roles, but man TaBarcode really know are hitting every single emotional beat. I was never a TaBarcode nor a MacauChay girlie, but man Be On Cloud has truly brought out their best this time around. Even though I fully know we are heading towards an incredibly heart wrenching ending for PheeNon, I can't help but want to hoard and scramble for moments of them together.

It's crazy how well, everyone was able to pull their weight this episode. There were so many moments that with less talented, less experienced actors, could have fallen flat, but they didn't. Ta and Barcode's PheeNon was so incredibly heart-beating, butterfly inducing before we were brought back into their reality outside of their relationship. 2J and Barcode's scenes were.... so disgustingly real, for lack of better words. I knew that storyline was never going to end well but it had been more than I ever expected Be On Cloud to release. They're tackling such real issues that weigh on teens with incredible tact, there's no romanticizing what happened. Even Phee's reaction was so understandable when you put yourself in the shoes of a teenager. I'll reiterate again and again, whatever you think about Be On Cloud as a management company, as a production company, they really are breaking boundaries and doing something right. Whatever happens in the second half, I think I'll be here, recovering, for a long time.

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