#Stacy ships it as she should
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a bird in the hand
“Hey uh, can I speak to Commissioner Gordon?” Officer Patricia Nolan looked up from what she’d been doing and stared. “It’s important,” the teen leaned forward conspiratorially, “Bat business, y’know?” The bullpen was always loud but right now it was silent, everyone stopping to watch their visitor. Just her luck Pat’s desk was the first one when you entered.
“Yes, I can see if he’s available,” she said faintly, glancing quickly over at what the boy was carrying in his arm but not sure how to broach the subject. She wasn’t as familiar with the capes as some of the others. “I’ll see if he’s available,” she continued as she picked up the phone on her desk. Her hands did not shake, her voice did not quiver. She was a Gotham City girl through and through, not much rattled her these days. But that’s not to say that the situation in itself wasn’t strange. Matt from from Vice speed walked by and was staring so hard he walked straight into the wall.
“Gordon,” the Commissioner answered with a sigh.
“Hey, It’s Pat Nolan,” Pat began. “You’re needed down in the bullpen, there’s a uh hero who wants to talk to you.” She glanced at the teen who was looking around the bullpen curiously. “It’s not a Bat.”
“Christ,” Gordon groaned. “Well who is it? Nevermind, I’m on my way. Too damn late for this; I thought Batman told all the other capes to stay out of the city?”
“He did, sir but I don’t exactly take orders from Batman,” the boy grinned. Pat gripped the phone a little tighter realizing he could hear Gordon through the phone. “And you probably guessed from the symbol that I’m Superboy,” he lowered his colored sunglasses with one hand. “The Suberboy.”
“Superboy will be waiting for you,” She said dutifully before replacing the phone. “The Commissioner will be down in a moment, do you want to sit?” Pat wasn’t entirely sure how to handle the situation so she just automatically defaulted to polite. It’s the reason her desk was so close to the front.
“Nah, I’m good plus I gotta hold onto my precious cargo,” Superboy said, giving ‘his cargo’ a light bounce in his arm. Being able to hold that kind of weight singlehandedly without any sort of strain, that kind of alien power you only saw once you crossed the river to Metropolis.
“Alright, I’m here, what do you- Christ on a Bike is that Robin?” Gordon jolted as he rounded the corner in his rumpled trench coat. “Is he alright?” He said but his tone was calm. Because while it was worrisome that the Boy Wonder was in the station at all, much less being held at Superboy’s hip like a toddler, the kid looked okay. His tights were a bit scuffed and he smelled vaguely of smoke but he looked entirely at ease in the other’s arm. His cheek was resting comfortably in the crook of Superboy’s neck looking, for all intents and purposes, deeply asleep.
“Oh yeah, he’s fine,” Superboy shrugged. “Rob’s just been working this arms dealing case for like, a week straight. No one is exactly sure when’s the last time he slept so once he got everything sorted, he just crashed. So anyway,” he reached into his jacket and didn’t seem phased by half of the bullpen reaching for their weapons.
He pulled out a USB and dangled it in front of Gordon. “Before he was forcibly put on the Dreamland Express, Robin wanted you to have this. It’s all his notes on the guns, who’s supplying them and evidence leading back to the guys in charge. We got some of the small fish tonight but you need a badge to get the the bigger ones.”
“Thanks,” Gordon mumbled, grabbing the USB hesitantly, like it was going to explode. “If I may ask, how did you get involved with this? Did the arms dealing originate in Metropolis?” Detective Mac groaned quietly in the back. They hated intercity especially investigations but it was worst with Metropolis, all ‘Superman this’ or ‘Superman that’. Pat kind of gets it now, the Supers have such a strong presence to them.
“Oh no, I think Robbie said these guys came from the south like Florida or something,” Superboy frowned. “I’m here because this one-” another light shake of Robin who still did not stir. “Got so wrapped up in this case he forgot our date night,” he rubbed at his eyes. “Found him making one of those string evidence charts on the fridge because he ran out of room on the counter.”
“And Batman?” Gordon questioned, like he didn’t want to know the answer.
“I think he’s in Japan on League business,” Superboy tilted his head in thought, “or was it Norway? Anyway not here. Rob always goes a little overboard when Bats isn’t around to spray bottle him into taking a break like hello, you’ve got nothing to prove, we already know you’re super sexy and way smarter than Batman.”
No one quite knew what to say to that so they just stayed quiet. Superboy glanced at the clock and groaned.
“Shit, I didn’t realize it was so late. I’m gonna be in so much trouble when I get home once I drop this idiot off,” he ended his sentence with a soft kiss to the top of Robin’s hair. “Hey, did anyone catch the end to the Knights/Meteors baseball game? I caught some of the eighth inning when Rob and I raided the warehouse where they were storing some of the guns, I think the Meteors were up.”
“They were,” Detective Driver said with a smug grin. “it was 8-9 Meteors but Matheson hit a triple at the bottom of the ninth and it ended 9-12 for the Knights.”
“Hell, we keep crumping at the last minute,” Superboy huffed. “I’m telling you that new pitcher they brought in from St. Louis ain’t cutting it; hope they trade him back at the end of the season.”
“Might as well trade the whole team while you’re at it,” Driver goaded. “Metropolis hasn’t put up a good showing since the miracle season of ‘93. If I were you, kid, I’d fly to a city with a better team.”
“Man, get off my back,” Superboy grinned. A couple people gasped quietly when he lifted himself up off the floor. “And be careful what you say; I doubt Robin will move to me if we decide to move in together which means y’all,” he clicked his tongue and did a one armed finger gun, “will have to deal with me on a more long term basis. Anyway, thanks for the help and uh the service you do. See ya.”
He turned and flew out the way he’d came, down the stairs to the main lobby and presumably out the front doors. And the whole time, Robin hadn’t moved from his slumber as if there were nowhere safer than his friend’s -boyfriend’s?- arms.
“Well that sure was something,” Montoya grumbled from the back.
“Bad enough we got Batman and his little kid freaks running around but now he have Supers too?” Chandler groaned, resting her forehead on the desk.
“Did you guys see-,” Stacy, the secretary and unofficial Batsignal operator said, poking her head in. She winced, “I guess you did.” She smiled and held her hands over her heart. “Well I think they’re cute, SuperWonder is so two years ago, SuperRobin is the only true ship.”
“I have no idea what you’re saying and I don’t want to know,” Gordon sighed, shoving the USB into his coat pocket and shuffling out of the bullpen. “If you need me, I’ll be going over this evidence and wondering why I’m still in the game if lovesick teenagers are doing my job for me.”
#literally could not get the image of Kon just like casually talking to the GCPD while holding Tim on his hip whos just zonked#Kon: I'm helping :DDD#Tim 10.5 hours later when he wakes up: I can never show my face in that building ever again#I'm very proud of remembering the officer's names from Gotham Central#idk about personalities I did my best haha#Stacy ships it as she should#the GCPD finds they like Superboy#esp as he stops by more and more with Robin#yeah he's terrifying powerful but he can talk the talk while having that sarcastic bitchy attitude you need to survive in gotham#Robin shows up with evidence#GCPD: hey where's ur man???#anyway Kon is a good boyfriend while also being so stupid but he's very punk rock and I love him so fucking much
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Ruby: Hey, Jaune, I know we've met your sister's and all, but what about Extended Family?
Jaune: Well, About that ...
~~~~~
Jaune: Hi Aunt Cynthia! It's been a while hasn't it!
(Champion) Cynthia: Indeed it has Jaune. Your sister's keeping you busy?
Jaune: Don't you know it. How's being Champion?
Cynthia: Tiring some days, detracts from my time to search ruins and hunt for relics and myths- Though i wouldn't change it for the world.
Cynthia: You've got a lot stronger at Beacon, huh? Let's test your skills in battle!
~~~~~
Darkness: You really must grow a spine cousin! You're the only Man in your Family, and you should act like it!
Jaune: I- I know Darkness ...
Darkness: Hold yourself High, Speak Clearly and With confidence and Teach those Girl where they Belong, Beneath Your Heel!
Jaune: Well, They're my friends-
Darkness: Grinding it down in the back of their heads, Pushing Their Faces into the D-Dirt!
Darkness: Making them clean it with their tongues, perfectly subservient to your whims or else they'll be punished~
Jaune: ... Darkness?
Darkness: *Holding herself, Shivering* And Gods that Strength~ Leaving Marks, throwing them around as Ragdolls~ Hmm~ The P-perfect Man~ To use them at your Leisure~
Jaune: ... This is why I don't talk to you about leading people.
~~~~~
Jaune: And Pyrrha's nice and helpful, teaching me how to fight.
Link: *Pouring Honey over Salmon*
Jaune: She reminds of your old friend Mipha in a way ... Kind, powerful, but too shy for her own good.
Link: *Pauses at Mipha's name, resumes*
Jaune: People think there's mutual respect, when really She's too scared to not be Pyrrha Nikos, Four Time Regional Champion and Argus's Sweetheart, and call them out on their BS. She's tired of the Fame. I just hope I can be the person she's not scared of being herself around.
Link: *Puts Fish in Oven, Turns to Jaune, Signing* I wish I could help you be that ... It's really a matter of time, and proving your reliability and the respect you have for her. Lords know that's what it took for Zelda to see me as her Anchor, not her Leash. Something to rely on in a storm, not fight against.
Link: After all, the most important thing we can give another is our Time. Don't squander yours.
~~~~~
Jaune: Aunt Sam-
Samus Aran: No you can't take apart my ship.
Jaune: I'm Jaune, Not Claire.
Samus: Right, I get all you confused.
Jaune: You seem stressed.
Samus: I'm always Stressed.
Jaune: More Stressed. You're Molting.
Samus: *Pulling loose feathers out* Yes, and it's stressing me out, Now if you don't know how to help me fix my armor, Shoo.
Jaune: *Hugs her* Take a breath Aunt Sammy.
Samus: *Shaking*
Samus: *Sinks to the Floor, Crying* I- I miss them.
Jaune: I know. I know.
~~~~~
Jaune: I just washed the walls and ceiling, could you please not walk on them?
Gwen Stacy: I dunno ... It's pretty Fun!
Jaune: Gwen, Please.
Gwen: Fine. *She Falls to the floor, landing in three point*
Jaune: Why do you do that everytime you're over.
Gwen: To get a rise out of you. *She slings a chair beneath her* It's pretty fun.
Jaune: *Sigh* Why am I always the target- Go mess with, what's his name? Kilometer? Whatever your boyfriends Name- HMM!
Gwen: *Webbing jaune's mouth, Blushing* he's not- We're not- Shut UP!
Jaune: *Smug, Mouth still covered in Web*
~~~~~
Jaune: ... And that's not even a sixth of them.
Ruby: ... That's all on your mom's side?
Jaune: Yeah, I only got Uncle on My Dad's side.
~~~~~
Mama Arc: HELLMOND BIORACY ANGEL! YOU ARE MY BROTHER IN LAW, AND YOU WILL TEACH MY SON ON HOW TO GET ME GRANDBABIES!
The Helltaker: *Scared for his life* Yes Ma'am!
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Heartrender!Reader x The Spiderverse Characters
Headcanon
(Im new a writing so i'm giving this a shot)
| Heartrenders have the ability to manipulate the body. They can snatch the air from your lungs, slow your pulse until you fall into a coma, or even literally crush your heart—all from a distance |
Seeing/when told that you put a villain into a coma
Miles, Miles 42, Gwen, Hobie, Pavitr, Miguel, Jessica, Lyla?
Miles Morales
Doesn't know whether or not he should be afraid or amazed. (Hes more amazed than afraid)
Immediately asks alot of questions
"So can you actually just murder someone in a second?"
"Can you hear/feel people's heartbeats?"
You told him yes to both of that questions and he just goes "That's amazing. How did you get your powers. I mean we spiderpeople get bit by spiders but what about you?"
"I'm born with it" you said smiling
More wows
He continues asking about it again but now 'scientifically'
(Miles x Gwen) Asks you if you can find out whether or not gwen likes him
(Romantic you x him) Asking you out buy bringing you to a science museum
(Platonic) He got tickets to a science museum for you and the crew
You showed him and the others that you can manipulate a heart on display to move
(Romantic) melts and heart speeding everytime you impress him even though he knows you can sense it
Miles Morales (Earth-42)
(Romantically) Fell in love with you the moment you walked into his dimension with the spidercrew even though he doesnt know anything about you
Think its cool that you're a heartrender
Asks you to slow down the other miles's pulse
He tells you he ships the other Miles and Gwen
Asks you to make them both blush and get a higher heart rate near each other
You both laugh together
Thinks you're the coolest person he has met when Hobie tells him how you put someone into a coma so easily
Asks you 2-3 questions but thats it
Will actually ask you politely to come with him on one patrol to help him put his enemies into a coma for a few months so he could take a leave and break
Gwen Stacy
First time you told her she asks you to knockout a villain just for jokes
When you actually did she was shocked and a little bit afraid
When you told her you 'accidentally' put them into a coma she was like "Wow"
(If platonic)Secretly annoyed that Jess didn't adopt her too because she wants to be your sister
(Romantic) Has a crush on you but is wary so that you dont detect her heart rate
Shes just listening closely to miles basically interviewing you
At one point asking you to help her at a science fair when shes teaming up with Miles to perform a trick on people
The trick being making them pass out for a second then bringing them back
Hobie Brown (Im sorry idk much abt him)
Says smth along the lines of "cool, try doing it to Pav and bring him back out of it"
After this he asks you to come to his universe to give the people he dislikes a heart attack.
A painful one
Proud of the science fair you and Miles did
Pavitr Prabhakar
Same reaction as Miles
Continues asking stuff with miles
Like "So you can actually know if someone has a crush on you?"
Becomes happy when you say yes
Asks you to come with him to meet Gayatri
At the end of the three of you meeting he asks you if you felt Gayatri or his heart beating up
Blushes and becomes giddy when you tell him both of them has a high heart rate near eachother
(Platonic)Eventually becomes best friends in crime and inseperable
(Romantic) both him and Gayatri became close with you and asks you to date them(?)
Miguel O'hara
Wary of you
Asks Lyla to watch over you during missions
Keeps a close eye of you to make sure you don't distrupt Cannon because you aren't a spiderman
When Jess recruited you he wasn't happy
Gave you a long speech when he learned that you put someone into a coma
Told you about dont do that or that or this when it is this that just to make sure you dont disturb cannon
Warms up to you eventually
Keeps you close to help him calm down sometimes
Jessica Drew
Recruited you even though you aren't a spider
Trained you to do combat outside of your powers
Genuinely adopts you
Looks out for you
Defends you against Miguel any day
You helped her name her daughter
You always is there to help her with her pregnancy by checking on the baby's heartbeat and all
If she has a health issue you are always the first she calls (everyone too tbh)
"That's my girl" when you put that one villain you and the others were fighting into a coma.
Lyla
Watches over you every second of everytime because of two things
Miguel or
Just pure curiosity of your powe4s
Reports back to miguel in an instant when you put the villain into a coma
Writes/keeps track of everything she knows about heartrenders
Interviews you with Miguel and Jessica every now and then to aks if you found or learnt anything new about heartrending
#spiderverse fanfic#across the spiderverse#spider punk#spiderman#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o'hara#jessica drew#spider woman#spiderverse x reader#miles morales x reader#miles morales x you#miles morales#gwen stacy x reader#spider gwen#gwen stacy#pavitr x reader#spiderman atsv#atsv x you#atsv gwen#atsv#atsv pavitr#pavitr prabhakar#pavitr headcanons#miguel headcanons#headcanon#heartrender#grishaverse#grisha#hobie brown x reader#hobie brown
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I actually hate bad spiderverse fans so mych
I hate white rich alternative people LEAPPINGN at spiderverse to say stupid stuff,, and like kuinda exposing like a little bit of racism and classism idk?? "hobie brown dirty" "hobie brown would love me (white)" "Pavitir is uwu softnboy twink... and he loves MEN SPECIFICLY" "i love cop miguel o hara" "Miles jus like me fr... (so hella white and rich and not coming from immigrant parents or whatever its embaressing.. (im refferung to the people who use miles experience to somehow.. swearve them of like devoloping as a person?? I cand descirbe it)) guys just STOP P{LLEASEEE.. I BEG I SHAKE AT THE BARS _PLELAS ESTIPP
tears flow down my face when I think aboiut that
also the way that the very specific white rich side of the spiderverse fans... only care about.. very little.. Its usally revolves around peter b parker.. spider noir miguel o hara. hobie brown. gwen stacy (notice how miles moralas isnt on this list) (also usally white people onlycare about hobie is because of weird feitshy vibe that I majorly dislike)
I rip at the seams! its so terrible! Its not like im not like also a like cringe mentally ill child, who greatly immersesis themselves in media.. its just that im notwhite and doing it! Im non-black too so.. IM PROBABLY MISSING THINGS, THAT RIGHTFULLY MAKE EVEN MORE PEOPLE MAD.. like come ON...
alsosome of the things you do to pavitir is TERRIBLE as the.. only? south asian character that is seen and named in spiderverse... im talking about yalls terrible ship name.. chai, tea, naan, like is he just.. food to yall???
still mad they trashed the cambodian character in the script... she would of been like the best actually.. im kinda glad they didnt add her though because by GOD would she been done DIRTY (her name is delilah I thing??? she appers in spider man 2 which is cool)
anyways please dont be racist thx!
this obv only applies to the minority of the fans... if your not terrible this post should sit fine
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heaven :-♡
gwen stacy x fem!reader
summary: you love eachother, just maybe not enough.
warnings; angst, hurt/comfort, lowkey manipulative reader (not w gwen), canon divergence, atsv spoilers.
wc: 2k
"NOW I BEND LIKE A WILLOW THINKING OF YOU, LIKE A MURMURING BROOK CURVING ABOUT YOU, AS I SIP THE REST OF THE COFFEE YOU LEFT, A KISS LEFT FOR YOU."
▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎○○○○○○○○▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎
THE FIRST TIME you were sure that you loved Gwen Stacy was when she had put herself before you from an arrow aimed straight at your heart. “I could’ve handled it.” Your voice was more devastated than angry. Because how can you be angry at someone who took an arrow for you. She bled out a little too much for your liking. The wound wasn’t deathly, as everyone said. But you trembled anyways, and you cursed her for trying to be heroic.
When she woke up 2 hours after her wounds cleaned up and sewn together, she saw you cry for the first time since she’s known you.
The annoying beeping sound of the machine by her side wasn’t helping. But as she opened her eyes to you with a teasing grin, pale face glowing under the illuminating white lights of the medical room and her fingers curled gently around your tightly closed fist, you relaxed. “Stop trying to get yourself killed. Cheating death is my thing, not yours.” You had tried to joke with her, failing terribly when the words came out wobbly and upset.
“If I had known you would’ve missed having me around so much, I wouldn’t have tried.” She responded hoarsely. You let out a small choked laugh and shook your head. “If you wanted my attention so badly, you could’ve just asked.” Gwen chuckles tiredly, her eyes strained themselves to be kept open.
You had stayed with her the whole evening until she was finally feeling better. The whole night was spent in silence, after. Neither of you had felt the need to say anything in between the mutually understanding of longingly shared looks and glances. And when she let herself lean against you, your arms moving to wrap around her felt like it made most sense than anything else in the world.
The first time she knew she loved you was when she had took a visit to your room, and a painting of her that was still in the works, stood in the middle like an masterpiece under a spotlight. And she realized that she loved the way you saw her, and she’d like to love you the same way you did.
You painted her the same way you had perceived her, the blue-eyed girl with so much good and bravery in her only someone who knew her as deep as they loved her could have seen. The painting was hung next to a portrait of your dead father. And that night, she had kissed you on top of your roof as the clock stroke 12 with the background noises of loud New Year house parties in your neighborhood. The both of you had gotten to know eachother with your lips and your hands holding onto the other like a sinking ship while the fireworks and night stars watches from the sky.
The last time you saw Gwen Stacy, you only let your gaze soften and holding hers for less than a second before looking back down to your hands, avoiding her gaze. You hear her voice for the last time as Miguel is relentless in sending her back to her universe, despite everyone in the room knowing the risks. “I thought we were supposed to be the good guys.” She thought wrong. Or at least, she understood Miguel wrongly. His role is to uphold the system, letting things fall into place at it should be, whether it be a good thing, or the opposite.
“We are the good guys.” The larger man had said before repeating it louder. He had misunderstood himself too.
Sure, it was a leader’s job to get his own hands dirty for the greater good. But what he’s truly fighting for, was the consequences of his own actions. A consequence that forced him to believe that others could not possibly achieve what he could not. A projection of his own guilt and insecurity.
He had looked at you differently then, your loyalty was made clear with your silence. But not a lot of people understand that sometimes cowardice is often mistaken as confidence in one’s decisions. You should have done something, you should have gone after her, should’ve spoken up to Miguel and told him you wanted nothing to do with this betrayal. But you were afraid that he was right. You have lost your own father as a canon event, what makes Miles any different?
4 days have passed since the incident. Miles Morales was still missing, unidentified in his universe.
Miguel O’hara and Jessica Davis along with 5 other spidermen have made their move, splitting up and jumping from universe to universe. They had started their search in earth 42 once they had realize that he wasn’t in his own universe. And yet, the most expected outcome was proven wrong. Not a single trace of him was found there, every single cameras were shown to be a clean slate, not a single abnormality.
The Miles they had found there was not the Miles they wanted.
“It’s impossible.” Miguel had stated. “It’s almost like he was never born.” But he did, the crying and praying existence of his parents had proven that. And yet all records and all signs of him had disappeared. “Someone must’ve meddled with the footages and paperwork when we were gone.” You suggested surely. He has snapped his head towards you, brows burrowed in confusion. “Someone, from the inside.” He says slowly, turning back again to his desk, thinking hard. “Someone who knows how to handle the technology here.” You added, watching the gears in his brain work. “Someone…” You tried slowly. “…who could’ve stopped him in the first place, but didn’t.” You watch his head flinch as he processes your accusation. “Margo."
"That’s it, it had to be her.” His eyes widen and he no longer second guesses his words.
“We need to find her, and interrogate her.” He decided then. You nodded absent-mindedly, walking closer to the door of his office.
“Her parents are gonna freak if their daughter disappears.” You say it like you cared, like you had hoped he would care. But you didn’t really, and you know he wouldn’t. “I don’t care.” And so Margot was taken into the Spider-Society physically for the first time to be held against her will for interrogation.
If it were any other spider-person, Miguel would’ve already used drastic measures. But with Margo, who’s fear was so visible, and intentions so obviously genuine, he gave in. He had made sure to be the one doing the interrogation, a glass room where no one else was allowed into. And he had pleaded, begged, scolded, and yelled for her to give him something he could work with. But she insisted that her worst crime in the society was not holding Miles back when she could’ve.
How he manages to still be this patient, you’re not sure. The bags under his eyes were getting more visible, and his snapping are more frequent. “What do you even gain from keeping secrets for him?” He had questioned her. “Neither of you owe eachother anything. And when I have to clean up the mess for his choices, you will bear the guilt and everything that comes with it as an accomplice.”
Margot says nothing, She sulks as he speaks, until finally you watch how she raises her head to look at the reflective glass, staring straight at you as if you’re visible in her line of sight.
Miguel sighs and make a move to leave the room when suddenly, the electricity dies, and darkness envelopes every part of the building. The glass door was automatically locked. "What the fuck-"
You take a deep breath, immediately walking away from Miguel’s calling, straight to the camera supervision. The usually blue lit area was as dark as a moonless night. You pulled out Margo’s computer with her own separate wiring from the other computers that’s directly wired to the building’s electricity.
There is less than 6 minutes before the electricity is back on again. You pulled out a paper and a pen as the today’s 15 hours recording of CCTV loads. Your hands moves quickly to jot down the hours and seconds of every recording Miles Morales in it with the accurate transcription of his whereabouts. The files were then immediately deleted. The computer being shut off and placed back where you found it. You wipe your hands on your thighs, as if cleaning the evidence off of you. Taking a step back after you fixed the computer back on it’s place, your breath hitched.
You stiffen as you take in the presence of another person. “Took you long enough.” Gwen Stacy stands behind you fully masked. “Don’t talk to me like you’re on my side.” She snaps. “I am.” You don’t turn out as your hand raises up, waving the folded paper in the air. Gwen snatches it from you and unfolds it to give it a glace through. “How did you know I was coming?” She asks finally.
3 more minutes.
“The same way I know your dad is still alive, I keep tabs.” Feeling the tension softly loosen, you drop your shoulders, breathing out a tired sigh while you spin yourself to be face to face with her. “Is this supposed to be an apology?” Gwen asks. You say nothing, waiting for her to continue. “Cause it’s a shitty one.” You smiled.
You didn’t need to see her face to know that she was frowning, to know that she was angry. “You didn’t care about me 3 days ago, why now.” Your expression is stoic as your smile fades off. “I’ve always cared about you. I also just happen to care about my job just as much.” Gwen scoffs. “Then why are you helping me, if you care so much about what Miguel thinks.” You shrugged. “I know whatever I say wouldn’t have been able to convince you to let Miles go.” Gwen beings to move, walking in circles around you, step by step. “Nothing can get me to give up on someone I care about.”
“Then there’s your answer.” Gwen shook her head to herself, eyes flinching away from yours. “Prove it, leave.” Your eyes shut themselves off tightly. "Gwen-“
“No, you said you cared for me. Then, choose me. No more half-assed, push and pull kind of love. Choose me, and stick with me.” You open your eyes to meet hers that were already looing at you. “You want me to give away all of my whole life, for what?” “For us!” She whisper-shouts in frustration. “No, for him.” You pressed.
Her face changed under the mask. Every expression she makes, was engraved in your head, to know someone from their littlest to their biggest and still be in a position where you realize that you might had not know her at all.
“He’s not your responsibility, Gwen. Why fight for him?” Gwen is silent. “Why fight every battle except ours? He owes you nothing.”
Every second you had decided to side with Gwen before this, you had not regretted them. But you had chosen her over everything since the moment you met. You had risked your life, your job, your fate, to side with her. And now, once again, she asks you to choose her. Despite the risks, despite what it would mean for you. “Choose me.” You repeat her words, watching her step back in hesitation, a knife through your chest.
“There it is.” You whisper, barely audible for her, but she heard you anyways. You smiled bitterly and counted down the last one minute in your head. “If you come back here again, he won’t let you leave. And he won’t go easy.” Gwen snaps out of her trance and twists and turn the handmade watch Hobie had given her, disappearing in a strike of light. She was gone before either of you could have said or looked at the other in a way you both knew would hurt. Lights begin to flicker to life, a queue for you to run back towards the mess you made in the name of love, and accept the fact that it hadn’t been enough, all of it was as good as nothing. But she was safe, and you had given her the last bit of yourself that you had afforded to risk for her.
#gwen stacy fanfiction#gwen stacy x reader#spider gwen#gwen stacy#ghost spider#atsv#across the spiderverse#atsv spoilers
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Everything wrong with AYA in one post
Phineas says "friendzone"
Phineas is freaking tall
Baljeet is tall
Gretchen is tall
Ferbnessa
Erm, what did they do to Buford's hair?
WHY DO HALF OF THEM LOOK LIKE BOBBLEHEADS
Isabella isn't chubby, chubby Isabella with curly hair>>>>>>>
Buford is thin
What did they do to freaking Milly, not only is she not chubby but she became hilariously tiny like, why not Gretchen. Give Milly her chub back and never make Gretch tall again
that one atrocious line "wE aRe gUys, wE dO nOt tAlK aBoUt fEelInGs"
The fact that the line was said by Baljeet
Doof plot was great but his design is just his normal one with grey hair
FERBNESSA
No Jeremy, Norm, Monty or queen gal STACY
Buford and Baljeet are straight
Baljeet and Ginger's relationship is handled very badly
Adyson has been reduced to common teen girl
All the fireside gals were done dirty, design wise and personality wise
Please, what did they do to Buford's voice?
Why does Jeet still sound like he's six?
WHERE IS CANDACE?
The plot regarding Ferb, Jeet, Buford and the gals trying to get Phinabella together was futile
Everyone is OOC
Phineas and Ferb wearing shoes on the bed at the start of the episode
Ferb and Holly are the only two designs I am completly satisfied with
● FERBNESSA
The plot has a lot of holes, I will not get into that
the "sick with salmonella" line was funny af but should have not been used as a joke
WHERR3 IS MY GIRL STACY
Why are all of Phinabella's friends acting like Marinette's classmates, it is weird
WHY WERE THEY ALL CLAPPING, I'M DYING LMAO
Why is Candace's chin pointy, give her her round face back
Isabella disconnecting from the BYG killed my heart
Where are Linda and Lawrence
WHY DOES EVERYONE BELEIVE THIS IS THE FINAL EPISODE. GIVE "LAST DAY OF SUMMER" THE RESPECT IT DESERVES.
● FERBNESSSSSAAAAA
I would have preffered if this episode explored the life of ALL the kids and not just one ship
Tell me if I missed anything
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Okay...Not the ship analysis yet but a little snippet of it. To write the analysis I had to think about why I like Red Crackle so much. And I realized one of the reasons why is that they remind me of another ship I also love:
(Warning:Spoilers of both Carmen Sandiego and Spider-Man Into/Across the Spiderverse ahead.)
Yes, they got differences but also massive resemblance either that once you notice, you can't unsee it. It isn't noticeable when you try to compare Gray and Miles and Gwen and Carmen, but once you switch...
Both Miles and Carmen are latino main characters, just that Miles is black and Carmen is brown. While Puerto Rico is a USA territory, in culture terms they share more with Latin America. And Even Miles not being born in Puerto Rico, his puerto rican roots and heritage are clear. 8/B in spanish is nowhere near as bad. As a Brazilian, we speak portuguese, which is a very similar language to Spanish(I myself know a little bit of spanish), but overall, both languages tend to sound very difficult, specially when you're learning in a place that doesn't speak any. Carmen didn't seem to be totally fluent in spanish either since in the Lupe Peligro episode she says her Spanish is getting better. So not fluent, at least in that point in time. Maybe that changes after that so I'll just assume both Miles and Carmen are working on their spanish. Another point is that they are both very smart. Carmen knows her geography and history AND can speak multiple languages and Miles is great at physics AND art, both very different areas from one another. Saying that, Carmen had everything to be a Mary Sue, just like Miles had everything to be a Gary Stu but instead, while they are extraordinary, we also see their weaknesses, flaws and mistakes. On the first two episodes of the first season of Carmen Sandiego and on the first spiderverse movie, we see Black Sheep/Miles Morales transition to becoming Carmen Sandiego/Spider-Man. And on that transition, someone was always by their side...
Both Gwendolyne Stacy(Spider-Woman) (or Gwanda ;) and Graham Calloway(Crackle) have a four letter nickname that starts with G and the protagonist always call them that(Gwen and Gray). Both have a surname that ends with Y. Both are a little bit older than the main character(Gray is two years older than Carmen and Gwen is 15 months older than Miles). Both are trans to a lot of people(I don't actually believe this, I think both Gwen and Gray are cisgender, specially Gwen, because of the comics and because while I think her revelation to her father was made in purpose to resonate and pass as a metaphor for coming out, I believe in the less popular theory that she was an ally and her Peter was actually trans and that is one of the reasons he suffered bullying and Gwen defended him and had that "Protect Trans Kids" poster in her room, this is literally the vibe she passes me:
Some time ago I saw a theory that the relationship of Miles and Gwen was a metaphor for one of the difficulties that interracial couples pass that the most privileged has to learn that the same society system that protects them, won't protect their partner in the same way, and that is shown through the way Spider Society treats Miles and I know there are more black spider people like Hobie and Margo but the parallel still works:he is not being accepted because he is different. The thing is, that theory kinda breaks the trans Gwen theory because if she was trans, sadly, the system wouldn't protect her either. I also don't believe it because of the voice actors. Some years ago, an adult could dub a children if he did the right voice. Nowadays, they cast a voice actor more similar to the character. Like, black characters need to have black voice actors, etc, otherwise they get canceled. And both of the voice actors for Gray and Gwen are cisgender, and I saw people complaining that if the producers wanted to make characters "potentially trans" they should have casted trans voice actors, for both characters. But anyway, I don't mind and respect the people who think they are trans). Both got competition for the other's affection(Gwen has now Spider-Byte and Gray has Ivy, Julia and pretty much everyone you can ship with Carmen in this show, which is a lot of people). Both are the lighter skin love interest not from where the protagonist is(Gray is from Australia and Gwen is from another dimension).
And now with the storyline similarities. Both pairings start as friends, so both lead to a slow burn. Both were an amazing partners in crime duo, working really great as a team, and being just the two of them or even with more people, their connection always stood out. Miles and Carmen never became official members of Spider Society/V.I.L.E. but disagree with them and escape from them to do what they believe is right. Both Gwen and Gray make a mistake and are expelled from Spider Society/V.I.L.E. (Gwen with the portal multiverse dimension go home machine or whatever and Gray by having his memories wiped) and then they realize too late they made a mistake with Miles/Carmen and now have to fix that mistake. Also both Carmen and Miles say "Goodbye Gray/Gwen." in the most DRAMATIC way possible before doing an grand triumphal exit and I love that for them. And the look Gray/Gwen gives them before they leave is THE EXACT SAME LOOK, I SWEAR. So as you can see, both ships leave a room for A LOT of angst and drama. Also just the way they look so fondly at each other and the way both Carmen/Miles and Gray/Gwen look sad when they have to leave or when the other has to leave them says it all. Platonic or not, both couples have an undeniable bond and just work so well together, being as friends, lovers, partners...They are each other's ride or die. They are each other's everything.
(Also just an personal opinion is that both Spiderverse and Carmen Sandiego have the MOST BEAUTIFUL ANIMATION I HAVE EVER SEEN) (Along with the new Miraculous movie) (Ladybug and Chat Noir are also very similar of Carmen and Gray but that's something more noticeable to pretty much everyone, I don't have to elaborate much on that matter) (I've got nothing to say about LadyNoir/MariChat being similar to Red Crackle that hasn't been said before)
The major difference about them is that, while both the Spiderverse movies and the Carmen Sandiego series don't have romance as their main focus, Miles and Gwen will most likely be canon in the films, just like they are in the comics. I think it will be a movie trilogy so they'll probably get together in the third movie(Beyond the Spiderverse in january? Anyway, 2024, save the date). I mean, Spider-Byte is cool and all but she's a game avatar or something so I don't think Miles and her can get together, even if he travels to her universe and decides to stay there or vice versa. They introduced her just now and we barely know anything about her, and Miles and Gwen clearly already have a whole build up story going on with a consistent arc so why mess it up? Besides, I think we need more main interracial couples representation in media. Aside from these two, the only GOOD main interracial couples I can think of are Druig and Makkari from Eternals(I never even watched Eternals and I know they are better than Ikaris and Sersi)(They are also an interracial couple but they clearly don't have the chemestry Drukkari does and Ikaris seems to be kind of a jerk tbh), Ricky and Gina(from HSMTMTS, which I don't watch either but their clips I saw on YouTube are just the cutest thing), Ben and Devi from Never Have I Ever, Daphne and Simon and Kate and Anthony from Bridgerton, and Julie and Luke(Juke) from Julie and The Phantoms(JATP) which is literally an impossible love story since Luke is dead(he's a ghost) and Julie isn't(she's alive) and the series was cancelled(still mad about it and will forever be). My point is:Couples with different ethnicities are not only little but the ones we do have are mostly either impossible to happen, unfairly treated/messed up by writers/not well executed or when treated right, we don't get enough content of them/they are forgotten, in the majority cases, and that needs to change. Anyway...Meanwhile, with Red Crackle, as Carmen Sandiego had a pretty open ending, canon can be whatever the hell you want, and for me is red crackle. That's it. Thank you for coming to my ted talk. Will be posting more "written podcasts" soon.
#redcrackle#red crackle#carmen x crackle#carmen x gray#graham x carmen#carmen sandiego netflix#carmen sandiego#carmen sandiego 2019#graham calloway#gray#crackle#netflix#gray x carmen#graham crackle#carmen x graham#across the spiderverse#spiderman#miles morales#gwen stacy#spider woman#into the spider verse#ghostflower#gwiles
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Maybe we SHOULD reclaim Sterecra as a ship.
Staci x Heather x Eva x Courtney x Sierra
Sterecra
Listen. I'm aware I could've gotten 'cr' from Scruffy. But A. He's an arachnid so it feels wrong, B. Heather would dump Sierra if Sierra dated Scruffy (and she would. It'd be ooc for Sierra even in fanon if she didn't date Scruffy) and C. He's dead and I think it's problematic to have a queer dead character in a ship #BuryYourGays
How it works:
Staci is dating Eva and Sierra
Eva is dating Staci, Courtney and Heather
Heather is dating Sierra, Eva, and Courtney
Courtney is dating Heather and Eva
Sierra is dating Heather and Staci
.
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I just did a reread of the entire October Daye series to look for breadcrumbs and hints in the earlier books towards some of the big reveals. The following contains spoilers for all books through An Innocent Sleep, so I’m hiding it all under a cut.
As of Book 18, we have found both Oberon and Titania hiding out in relatively minor characters in the San Francisco area, as well as Janet, and it’s clearly hinted that Maeve is also in the neighborhood. Janet was a housewife in Berkeley, Oberon was a cop in San Francisco, and Titania was October’s changeling friend Stacy. Upon rereading, there were more clues for Titania than Oberon or Janet, but there was also more time building that story. Accordingly, I think Maeve will have more breadcrumbs as well. The following is a list of potential candidates, and the arguments for and against them through the whole series.
There are clues scattered throughout, but especially in the last 3 books. From Be The Serpent - “[find] Mom lurking under a rock somewhere. Or maybe a pier. She always did like the water.” When we get to Sleep No More and An Innocent Sleep, the question is who has been shoved outside the main bubble, or is back when they should be gone?
Here is my list of candidates, in no particular order:
Lily
She’s a very rare type of fae, but her powers are extremely restricted by location. She’s strongly tied to water, and has been keeping an eye on Amandine and October for many years. Her court is one of the oldest independents in the region, but she stays out of politics. She also knows about Luna and her ties to Blind Michael. On the other hand, we’re pretty sure she died in Late Eclipses, which might be a problem.
Marcia
There’s a reason this seems to be the most popular fan theory. She’s a weak unspecified changeling who has been there from the very beginning, present at many critical moments, with often inexplicable immunity or reactions. She steps up to be seneschal of Goldengreen, she has no fear of the night haunts, she loves pixies, and resists transformation by Simon (One Salt Sea is a big book for Marcia). In Chimes at Midnight, she reacts to King Giliad discussions as if she remembers him. She is unphased by meeting multiple Firstborn (Ludiaeg and Amphitrite and Eira). Eira also fails to transform her, or she escapes the transformation somehow. We also never see a description of the smell of her magic. She does not appear in Titania’s mirror universe, but we don’t ever go to Goldengreen, so she may still be there. The only real argument against Marcia is she’s too obvious.
Marianne
We haven't met her directly in the novels, but the Windermere’s nursemaid comes up a number of times, saving Arden and Nolan from Oleander and death in the earthquake, helping hide them for years after. While she is missing, Nolan is convinced she is still alive, and brings Marcia to the Duchy of Ships to help him search for her. The biggest arguments come from the novella, Once Broken Faith, where Marianne tells a story with the sentence “because she was happy then, my sweet girl” in reference to Luidaeg, strongly implying Marianne has a sense of ownership. Titania is called “her father's other wife”, which again hints at Marianne being her mother.
Melly
Hob in Shadowed Hills, Kerry's mother. She fits the pattern of background characters close to October, but her inclusion in Titania's illusions makes it less likely.
Mary the Roane
Another background character with significant impact, but her level of contact with the Luidaeg as her mother makes her unlikely.
Julie
Another background character with strong ties to October, and changeling status, plus a transformation type. She does mysteriously vanish in the fight with Titania, but Seanan indicated in a Tumblr post that was an editing hiccup (or was that a false trail?) Her desire to kill October at various points is probably the biggest argument against her as Maeve.
January
One of the people Titania shoves out of the way in her illusion, but also, January *creates* things. She made the first cyberdryad. She died and was resurrected. October says “There had probably been some reason she needed Jan’s existence to keep her reality from crumbling, but i couldn’t think of what it might be”
Minna
Offhand mention in Sleep No More, she deposited servants at Dreaming Glass and vanished. Too offhand for such a major player.
Helmi
Maeve is a creature of the water and the deep, and the most maternal of the three - her presence in Saltmist still gives her visibility to the land, but keeps her safe in the depths, away from Titania’s purview. She's more background than some of the other candidates, with no real unexpected capabilities. Like Marianne, some of the strongest evidence is in the novellas.
My slightly more complicated hypothesis: much like Titania had multiple pasts, Maeve too has gone through multiple identities, in 1906, she was Marianne, the Windemere’s nursemaid, and she sacrificed that version of herself for their survival, becoming Marcia. This explains both why Marcia recalls Giliad, as well as some of the signs pointing to Marianne.
#october daye#dont read seanan#seanan mcguire#spoilers#be the serpent#an innocent sleep#one salt sea#chimes at midnight#fan theory#leaving off character tags that might be spoilers#the luidaeg#rosemary and rue#sleep no more#late eclipses#once Broken Faith
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been thinking on how peter's had a lot of love interests over the years, but only six of them most consistently stick around and impact his character. and how the big six model works for other spider-love stories too.
so peter's big six are as follows:
liz allan: the one-sided superficial first crush on a girl with more social capital that ultimately goes nowhere
betty brant: the first girlfriend with whom he eventually returns to being just friends, who ends up with his friend
gwen stacy: the first love, who's his intellectual equal in the classroom and of a background he aspires to, who dislikes his alter ego, who dies
mj watson: the true love, who's his equal socially, who knows and accepts his alter ego
felicia hardy: the problematic situationship with a vigilante who isn't a good influence on him, who only cares about the alter ego
cindy moon*: the forced spidermarriage with another spider-person the universe insists he's the 'soulmate' of
[*YES, cindy hasn't been shipped with peter since the mess that was her introduction and it'll hopefully stay that way. but she makes the cut because she's a very memorable character with a very distinct dynamic with peter that's being replicated already-- particularly with miles and gwen: "look, male and female spider-people! let's force them to kiss and call them soulmates!"]
i could go into a lot more detail, like how they tend to appear in pairs, the progression seems tied to peter’s age, and the overall romantic arc seems to be about peter finding someone who can love both sides of him. but those specifics are subject to change, probably more indicative of the publishing climate (people didn't used to hate love triangles; marvel used to let their characters grow up) and honestly keeping it this vague makes the model more flexible.
at any rate, these characters are far from the only girls peter's had tension, relationships or hookups with, but these are the ones who have the most memorable personalities and the most distinct dynamics with him that have lasting impact on his stories.
tied to their staying power, the first five are also the ones who are adapted the most: if you're writing a peter-spider-man story, you're probably choosing his love interest(s) from this list. and the list tends to be condensed down even more from these six (how many times have you seen peter's love interests advertised as betty-gwen-mj-felicia, or gwen-mj-felicia, or gwen-and-mj?) with each woman standing out and contrasting well against each other.
and the six— not the specific love interests, but their attributes and story functions— should be used more for other spider-people. if nothing else because it means each character can have a convenient shortlist of love interests to reference and return to, instead of a constantly-growing stack of quick relationships that never get to deepen or evolve.
miles
i mentioned this here, but miles's supporting cast is at its strongest when it creates original characters for him to interact with, fills them with elements of classic spider-man characters and their stories, and remixes those stories in a unique way.
so his love interests, at their best, are original characters whose qualities combine and reimagine the big six's.
for example:
katie bishop: liz allan (superficial interest in the first girl he crushes on in canon) x betty brant (first relationship).
lana baumgartner: cindy moon (fellow superhero) x mj watson (dysfunctional family background; from his world)
kamala khan: betty brant (remaining friends) x liz allan (unreciprocated crush) x cindy moon (fellow superhero).
gwen stacy (65): gwen stacy (...) x cindy moon (forced spidermarriage) x liz allan (superficial attraction based on a need to gain status through a relationship with her)
barbara rodriguez: gwen stacy (classmate who's naive to his alter ego) x betty brant (goes on to date his friend).
tiana toomes: felicia (initially problematic vigilante) x mj (the true love who balances him out).
... though there are six listed, honestly i think miles' love interest roster isn't complete yet, and there are one or two more slots left to fill.
anyway, some notes of interest:
miles inverts the 2:1 civilian to superhuman ratio of peter's love interests (marvel seems to be moving away from the civilian love interest in general... and miles seems to want a partner who can come with him on adventures)
he's still in high school, yet has had a lot of love interests (which speaks to how characters age a lot slower than they used to... and how miles isn't as much of a loser as peter was at his age. he's less sexist, smoother, and more social, and therefore girls actually like him back).
instead of sorting the love interests based on when he met them, sort them based on why he's drawn to them: katie and barbara are his classmates. gwen and kamala are prominent heroes in their own right who he keeps getting pr-relationshipped with. lana and tiana are vigilantes from troubled backgrounds who he can influence for the better. two love interests for his civilian side, two for his hero side, two that can bring out both by helping miles remember why he's a hero in the first place-- because of the person he is under the mask-- and influencing him to stay true to that person.
he hasn't had a fridged/tragic love interest, intellectual equal, or been in a toxic dynamic yet in the comics (but he has in the games with phin mason)... raneem rashad, anyone?
anyway at this point, miles is still in high school and has had plenty of love interests. and he's a young enough character that we're just gonna have to see who lasts as more contenders are introduced.
if i had to guess,
kamala will stick around because she and miles are the two biggest New Generation Legacy Heroes and the pr shipping writes itself. but because she's too big a character in her own right and far from his corner of the marvel universe half the time, she might not be a constant adaptation. she'd either be watered down, or it would pull too much focus to explain her presence unless it's specifically a team-up or group story. and even if she does show up, we know it's a given they won't end up together.
gwen (unfortunately) will stick around because of spiderverse synergy (free her). but because she's also got too much going on, has her own world and has Gwen Stacy Baggage attached, she’s too difficult to fit into his stories without completely compromising her character to force her into the girlfriend role. and like kamala, being his love interest holds her back. she should hopefully not be a constant adaptation either. assuming it's remembered that she's her own protagonist and not just Miles's Girlfriend.
tiana (hopefully!) will stick around and make it to the endgame because she's That Great, she's too unique to be confused for another character, she's got a memorable design and backstory, and she isn't popular enough to steal his spotlight.
barbara might survive... or we'll just get a series of civilian visions academy gfs in her image (like insomniac's hailey cooper). she's easy to adapt, but also easy to forget.
lana might last, but if she's readapted, she'll likely step into katie's role as the initial white visions gf (... maybe the only visions gf; sorry barbara), and maybe kamala's in adaptations where ms marvel being in miles's supporting cast would be too distracting but they still want that superhero-flirtation-to-friendship story. it's a tossup.
katie's probably going to fade away. she has too little impact and is too easy to confuse with kate bishop, hawkeye. no big loss.
... and we're probably due one more major love interest category: a tragically villainous tech-powered girl of color, like phin or raneem.
hopefully canon starts to standardize his love interests soon, because if he keeps getting new ones, all of them become easier to forget… which means the worst relationship with the best exposure, gwiles, will rise to the top simply because she's the one that made it to the movies.
as for gwen...
even more complicated.
her character's even newer than miles's, and her romantic history is largely defined by having other people (men. and em jay.) push their desires on her, rather than gwen exploring her own. she's had a lot of false starts, and a lot of obviously queer tension with other women that marvel refuses to act on, but canonically she's barely dated at all and isn't particularly motivated by romance.
gwen also sits between peter and miles in terms of love interest originality: it makes sense for gwen to initially interact with alternate versions of peter's supporting cast, because that's gwen's supporting cast too... but like miles, she should still have unique dynamics with her love interests because she's not peter. and since she's gwen-65, she should eventually branch out to relationships with characters 616-gwen never would have met or gotten close to.
so no, gwen should not end up with earth-65's em jay ~because every spider has their mj~. that idea implies that mj is drawn to peter's spider-powers instead of peter as a person, and that she'd have fallen for anyone who had them. it invalidates the uniqueness of peter and mj's romance, and of gwen-65 herself (and any spider-person you're trying to shove an mj at to check a box). gwen deserves a love story that's totally new and all hers. no peter, no miles, no castoff love interest of peter or miles, no alternate version of a peter/miles love interest. give her someone new.
anyway so far i think we can make a case for maybe three or four of hers.
peter parker*: liz allan x gwen stacy. except in this case, he's the one with the superficial one-sided crush on her and he's the one who ends up dead.
miles morales (1610)*: cindy moon, the forced divine spidermarriage. with a bit of liz allan, for the superficiality of it all.
harry osborn: primarily betty brant (the high school sweetheart she never got to have who ultimately stays friends with her), with elements of felicia (a former vigilante) and mj (understands and accepts the alter ego)
em jay watson: yes she's an mj, but honestly? she's the gwen stacy (the first love out of high school in the same career path who hates gwen's hero alter ego) with elements of felicia hardy (she's the toxic relationship) and betty brant (going on to date one of gwen's friends)
[*gwen doesn't reciprocate their feelings, but at this point peter and miles' links to gwen are so inescapable it's a given that romantic tension will define their dynamics for the forseeable future in the comics. and anytime spider-gwen is adapted, she's gonna have to deal with this shit from at least one of them. mentally i'm lumping them together because these fuckers are The Same.]
she has a few major slots left to fill... but gwen's situation isn't quite like miles and peter's (aside from having a different personality and story, she's queer and female), so they're gonna differ.
gwen can't be in a relationship with someone on 65 who doesn't know her secret identity because it's already public there. unless there's a status quo reset that gives gwen her privacy back, she dates someone on earth-616, or we retcon her a high school boyfriend from her early spider-woman days. which makes her unique from peter and miles.
she hasn't seriously dated anyone who's only interested in her famous alter ego yet either. which, given ghost-spider's celebrity status on earth-65, should be an eventuality... johnny-65 or felicia-65, anyone?
gwen-65 was never a science-oriented person, doesn't share peter and miles' humanities-or-stem postgrad conflict, and already committed to music. so a science-minded love interest would result in a different dynamic because gwen wouldn't be their intellectual equal. which could be interesting.
... but if we reframe gwen's postgrad conflict to be 'musician or professional superhero'... dating another full-time vigilante is the logical next step. how about kitty-65? or, what about spider-punk, who's both?
(... and if it's '65 or 616'.... well. maybe dating another superhero who isn't peter or miles on 616 could work too...... so, cindy moon, kaine or anya corazon?)
she hasn't met or begun a relationship with her true love yet. if she even has one. who knows, she could turn out to be ace.
... and since this has to be stated somewhere, it's all but obvious at this point that gwen's queer. she needs to have both male and female love interests.
being in the closet, pressured into comphet and sucked into imbalanced relationships where she'd be the subservient partner (usually to a man) are currently what defines gwen's romantic life, and the roadblocks stopping her from moving on. so before she gets any further, she's gonna have to resolve those issues first. which is gonna take a while, because of spiderverse synergy and marvel's reluctance to let her be queer and leave the male gaze.
at this point gwen's love interests can be paired too. and like peter and miles, it's reflective of her romantic arc (evolving from an object of someone else's desire to a subject who chases her own), which is related to her personal one (a girl fighting for equality and autonomy in a universe that wants to keep those things from her). it's about gwen's level of agency and reciprocity in the dynamic:
she begins with virtually no say in her relationships, being shoved into forced romances with more popular and powerful male characters that trap gwen in the male gaze and take her away from her world (peter and miles).
and starts to deepen her relationships with people she's sincerely attracted to [who are also her world's versions of peter's supporting cast] but can't be with because of extenuating circumstances related to gwen being a superhero and them being unable to keep up with her (harry and em jay).
logically, the next threshold should be overcoming those circumstances to actually have lasting romantic relationships with people who are her equals. and the love interests should be characters unconnected to peter parker, miles morales, or their supporting casts. something new.
and then maybe we'll find out if gwen's genuinely not interested in romance, or if she was so traumatized that she didn't realize she could be in a healthy relationship and like it.
if it's the latter, then she'd better get actual closure with harry and em jay, where she can actually be in relationships with them, since she's barely dated harry and hasn't even gotten together with em jay, or at least acknowledge why they didn't work out.
and then give her 3-4ish major male and female love interests to compensate for the toxic and one-sided relationships she's had so far. most of her experience being that is too depressing.
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Cold Hard Truths
Disclaimer: this story is not for fans of the Peter/Gwen ship! If you are a diehard shipper of them and dislike anything that pokes holes in that ship, do not read! On the flip-side, this is not a story that bashes anyone. It does, however, cast a critical light on Gwen Stacy and her canon choices.
Summary: Peter has very different feelings about the kiss on Thanksgiving than in canon and as much as he cares about Gwen, there are some things to air out if either of them can move forward.
As Peter continued to skate a little more away from Liz and Flash, he heard the scrape of approaching skates and looked up to find Gwen coming near him. He started to wave but the look on her face stopped him.
"You've been avoiding me all week long!"
"What?"
Peter recalled when he had tried contacting Gwen earlier only to get told she wasn't available by her dad when Peter could clearly hear her voice in the background. Didn't she not want to talk to him? He was already getting more confused by the second as to what this was all about.
She crossed her arms and glared a little, "I won't be your second choice."
Peter really didn't feel like chasing her down to tell her his side of things AGAIN so he grabbed her shoulder, "Okay, look. I was going to tell you this over the phone but maybe this works out better doing this in person. . ."
She turned to look at him with curious, hopeful eyes.
He internally cringed. Saying this was going to SUCK. He took a deep breath and formed the words, "I don't see you as anything more than a friend."
Gwen's jaw dropped, "WHAT?!
People started to look their way, so she hunched her shoulders and dropped her voice, "I mean, you-you don't. . ."
Peter rubbed his eyes and sighed, "No, I don't. I'm sorry."
Gwen looked away, "Then. . .the kiss and the hints I gave. . ."
"Hints? I didn't realize you felt anything like that until you kissed me on Thanksgiving. And I was kinda too much in shock when you kissed me to say anything, " he stated, rather bluntly.
"Oh. . .I see."
She clearly didn't.
Peter felt awful seeing the hurt in her eyes, but it had to be said. The one good thing about the avoidance was that he had some time to review what he felt and ask May for advice. Surprisingly, his aunt was very supportive of his lack of feelings towards Gwen.
*flashback*
"Dear, you don't need to feel guilty about not returning someone's feelings. There's going to be no easy way to say something like this, especially to such an old friend."
Peter frowned, "But what if I say the wrong thing and end the friendship?"
His aunt shook her head, "Peter, unless you say something intentionally cruel and further trample the poor girl's feelings, it won't be you who ends the friendship. Whatever flaws in your upbringing or in you, I know for a fact that you are not naturally cruel nor did we raise to be so. Be straightforward but also be as kind as you can afford to be."
His shoulders deflated, "And if she ends the friendship? Won't it still be my fault?"
At this, May Parker took her nephew's face in her hands and spoke, "That would rest entirely on Gwen's shoulders. If she can't handle being 'just friends' then maybe she was never a friend in the first place. Friendship has a very special place in life and should never be undervalued or tossed away lightly. When Mary-Jane told you she wasn't ready for a serious relationship, did you stop hanging around her or enjoying her company even though you were a little hurt?"
"No. You're right, Aunt May. Thank you."
She patted his cheek, "Don't mention it, Peter. It's what mothers do."
*end of flashback*
"I-Gwen, I've always appreciated your friendship and I hope we can keep that going still! Just because I don't feel anything romantic between us doesn't mean I don't still care about you," Peter said while gently gripping her shoulders.
She remained silent both her head and eyes turned downwards.
He looked at her pleadingly, "Forget thinking about me in that way and move on, alright? You'll find that someone at some point and I'll support you 100%. Well, maybe not if they're a serial killer or abusive or something. Other than that I'm behind whoever you choose."
Peter thought he saw her lips twitch at that last part and gave her one last squeeze before letting go.
"Give yourself some time to adjust, alright? I'll see you. . .when I see you," he awkwardly stated before skating away.
Great note to end that on, Parker, he thought. Gah! He could have kicked himself for making THAT his conversation ender. However, before he could further berate himself on his choice of phrasing. . .
"Tiger, can we talk?"
Since only one person calls Peter that nickname, it wasn't exactly hard to guess the next person coming up to him.
"Oh, hey MJ. Sure, I guess. What do you need?"
Mary-Jane Watson looked much less carefree than usual and her next words showed this.
"What'd you say to Gwen? She looks like you told her Christmas was canceled."
He grimaced.
Wonderful, the rumors are practically starting already. Knowing how gossip mills love a bad guy, Peter will probably be made out to be the next Satan by the time the week is over.
"To make a long story short: she likes me beyond our friendship and I. . .had to explain that I don't see her like that."
MJ's eyes widened and she uncrossed her arms in shock.
"Peter," she said slowly, "she's had feelings for you since the third grade."
Oof. Now he feels worse.
"Oh, wonderful. That's not the best thing to hear when you're hoping for someone to move on quickly."
MJ frowned, "Do you really think Gwen's the one you should be writing off? She's been waiting for you for years and Liz only just started giving you the time of day. And even that still seems divided between you and Flash."
Peter shook his head. "First off, they literally just broke up this fall so of course they aren't over each other yet. Point two, Gwen could have told me much earlier than this year and we could resolved all this ages ago. Point three, neither of those previous points compare to the fact that I can't FORCE myself to like her like that."
"No one's saying you have to force yourself, Tiger. I'm just wondering if you've thought this through enough. You're not a neanderthal by a longshot, but you don't always know how to go about things like feelings. Maybe you should be giving yourself some time to really think before talking like that."
Her voice was set in a soft, coaxing tone but Peter was so done with this conversation and everything else today.
"I've had since Thanksgiving to think about it since she wouldn't return my calls. AND she had her dad stonewall me when the phone was picked up. I heard her talking in the background when he answered the phone, MJ. All she had to say was 'hey, I need some time to think before we talk' and I'd have been happy to wait. But I had no idea what was going on with her at all. If she's loved me since the third grade and we've been friends for even longer than that, why is it SO HARD for her to communicate with me what she wants?"
He knew it was kind of unfair, venting at MJ like this, but he couldn't say this to Gwen after he already took a sledgehammer to her feelings.
She had paused for a long moment and Peter was tempted to skate away like he had previous conversation, when she opened her mouth once more, "She didn't want to ruin the friendship she has with you."
He looked away for a moment before speaking, "I don't want that, either, but it's kinda hard to keep a friendship alive if it's this painful for us to talk to each other. As the social expert between the two of us, Mary-Jane, how much more difficult is it to keep a long-term romance alive if this kind of thing happens all the time?"
Dead silence was his answer as he pinned her stunned face with a searching look, ". . .Yeah. That's what I figured."
His voice held no hints of mockery, just tired expectance.
This time he didn't even bother with excusing himself; Peter just skated in the direction of the hot chocolate stand. Solitude and hot chocolate would really go a long way to improving his mood.
It would be not long after this thought that a lightning bolt hit the ice rink.
#tssm#tssm peter parker#the spectacular spider man#tssm gwen stacy#tssm mary-jane watson#tssm au#tssm gwen stacy critical#tssm mary-jane watson critical#which is rough because I love mj but her shipper tendencies would realistically cause problems#the rest of the time she's great tho#my main beef is with gwen
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Theater Kid HC's
Have some headcanons for my theater kid babies! @artzychic27 @imsparky2002
As the class name may suggest, they all have a passion for theater, fitting since they’re the homeroom class of the school’s theater teacher. They’re always involved in the school’s drama productions, whether as crew or cast members. As a result, they’re all pretty close to Jean and Mylene.
Keep it well in mind, the only nickname Dorothy is okay with being addressed by is “Dot”. Heed this warning if you value your life, call her “Dotty” and she will make you suffer.
Due to the hectic current state of Paris, Ayesha leads the class in meditation sessions to help them manage their stress. It’s helped keep the akumatization rate of their class down, more so than some other classes. Ayesha also serves as the class therapist, listening whenever someone needs a shoulder to cry on.
Soo-Yeon is the unquestioned dad of the class, and takes his role very seriously. He keeps spare snacks and first aid supplies in his backpack and keeps track of everyone during class outings, and also provides pretty good advice in difficult situations. He also just has dad vibes.
Candace is the Class Mom to See-Yeon’s Class Dad (They may or may not have small secret crushes on each other, but no matter). She keeps tabs on everyone, making sure they’re safe, and helping them stay on track with their assignments. She also keeps a list of everyone’s triggers on hand at all times.
Jesse is without a doubt the baby of the class, and everyone is extremely protective of him, helping him to stay calm and happy. If anyone upsets him, they will pay dearly. (The same goes for his besties, Mylene and Jean, who both went feral on an asshole who pushed him into a panic attack. It was terrifying.)
Anais often gets way too wrapped up in her projects and school work due to pressure from their parents and doesn’t get near as much rest as it should. Her classmates can tell when they’ve pulled an all-nighter and make sure it gets proper rest and eats any missed meals.
Margo loves to use her talent for DIY to make all sorts of little accessories and presents for her friends. It’s her love language, the giving of gifts and she lights up when she sees how much they love what she makes!
The combination of Eri’s overly dramatic and formal manner of speaking and her tendency to slip into her native Japanese can at times make her difficult to understand, but her classmates have mastered interpreting what she says and relaying it to others.
When an akuma attack occurs, their number one priority is staying together and keeping everyone safe. They do a head count every few minutes and have several protocols to keep everyone calm.
Candace, Staci and Margo are all on the cheer squad together, and sort of form a benevolent, non-antagonistic version of the Plastics, (Jean actually calls them “The Nice Heathers”) in a way. Candace is kind of like end-of-movie Regina, channeling her frustrations into cheer but still a nice person. Staci is a much snarkier Gretchen, she knows a LOT but doesn’t use it against people, and Margo is basically a sweetheart, Karen, but like, with a brain.
Brecken cares enormously for animals of all shapes and sizes, hence him frequently volunteering at the animal shelter one of his moms manages and his desire to be a veterinarian. He also frequently takes care of injured animals and has even snuck them into the school on more than one occasion, with the help of Kim.
Everyone in the class ships Brecken/Evie and Jesse/Anthony, and had a very difficult time keeping it on the down low, and threw class parties when each couple got together. Both couples were embarrassed but also touched.
The class worries a lot about Mona, not necessarily because of her handicap but because their head is always in the clouds and they’re rarely paying full attention. They all like to check in on her throughout the day and pull them back to earth so they don’t accidentally roll down the stairs.
Roxie has a very high number of detentions due to getting into fights defending their friends. They just find it difficult to hold their temper when someone they care about is being threatened.
Mme. Winters is one of the biggest Mama Bears in the entire faculty. She is extremely proud of her students and their work, and will not tolerate any disrespect. She keeps fidgets on hand for Jesse and Anais, makes sure Brecken has the help he needs, has bandages on hand for Soo-Yeon and Aggie, etc. This also extends to other classes, she does NOT tolerate bullying of any kind. (Even Chloé is scared of her)
Leave your thoughts in the comments and reblogs!
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Me after watching ATSV
✨Me rating all the characters✨: (My opinion)
Miles Morales:
he has issues with his life and is doing his own thing even know Miguel give him PTSD with that theme of this but good character and this boi is bloody 15?! so if miles is 15 and maybe likes Gwen- waittt isn't Gwen like 16? she kinda looks like it? oh well it's young love. 9/10
Gwen Stacy:
has daddy issues with her dad and i love her hair and it kinda gotten long and pinky like cause of dye which kinda suites her more Gwen also maybe likes Miles but Captain Morales called her a emo which is sooo "NOT TRUE" that's messed up and has a canon event with Peter parker from her dimension losing him but i'll give it a 9/10?
Peter B Parker:
i meannn yes he's a father of a daughter and a son of a mother but he did want Mayday to be like Miles try to be the bi-ist father figure that he can be- why does ATSV fans honestly ship Miguel and Peter? should do the same??? okay look this nice gentlemen eating, hmm yes, 8/10
Mayday Parker
awwweeee she's sooo cute i just wanna hug her^^ she just want to be like her dad fighting crime she would've been a good little sister to miles and it was funny cause Hobie was impressed by her taking a crap i also do agree on that. 10/10
Hobie Brown:
okay okay he's a good character i love his British, i am also British and PUNK HELL YA! my habits came in when Hobie was on the screen i was like WAOHHHH i love his piercings and very muchly thinks his Bi or Trans i mean Gwen supports Trans people like her dad so that would've been cool if hobie did support as well but yes and he was the only one to not chase miles i was like thank god, 9.5/10
pavitra prabhakar:
now i feel like he would be in Ms Marvel for all i care for cause i love how they done with the character my cousins and that loved him, and i am muslim soo kinda weird story to explain but he's just a happy person and is cheery for others, i swear to the people seeing this please DON'T put "i love Chai tea" anyways yeah i have high hopes for him. 9.5/10
Miguel O'hara: (the moment you all been waiting for...)
okay he SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER I LOVEEEE HIMMMM! after losing his daughter he's like a cool hearted spider but when i first time saw Miguel before i even seen the movie i thought he was Vampire cause the fangs, the red eyes it all screams "Vampire"? and the theme....*spider man 2099 theme stuck in my head* listen i know all the Miguel O'hara fans simp for the guy but come on yes he's a "Hot Dad" but when i see all these Spidersonas all of them date Miguel that is not Canny no offense! but...poor guy just lost his daughter but it's still up to you lot, 💖/10
and i know he's not the father of the daughter but he had another self that had a daughter and he died soooo that's kinda reason why you guys shouldn't disrupt a canon event,
#atsv#pavitr prabhakar#miles morales#gwen stacy#hobie brown#mayday parker#peter b parker#spider man across the spider verse#multiverse spider mans#my rating#my choices
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ttwt episode 7
“Last time, on Total Takes World Tour: our thirteen remaining players were let loose in the Dandenong Ranges in southern Australia with no supplies, no maps- nothing but each other! Even though Team Mojo hit a rough patch while Team Yaoi pulled themselves together for Julia’s sake, it was Albert’s environmental expertise that pulled the Mojos to the finish line, and landed Team Yaoi back in economy. Will they continue to stick together to defend their fellow castmates against Patrick? Will Team Mojo ever stop getting lost in every location we drop them in? Find out now, on Total Takes World Tour!”
Early morning light sifts through the open windows of the first class cabin, awakening everyone bright and early. At this altitude, there are no clouds to filter out the sunshine, let alone trees and houses, so it’s up and at it for Team Mojo.
Michela yawns and helps herself to the breakfast buffet set up across from the mocktail bar. Chris’ off-limits hot tub bubbles in the background, and the faint sounds of the flat-screen television in his private quarters makes its way through the silence in first class.
Albert shifts up next to her, taking up a paper plate and sorting through the assorted vegan options (which, albeit, aren’t very impressive).
“I honestly don’t get how you can just not eat like that,” Michela smiles, helping herself to a large heaping of bacon. “I’d probably starve to death.”
Albert chuckles. “It’s an acquired taste, I suppose. But it’s for the greater good,”
“Does that stuff really make a difference? I mean… no offense, but you’re just one guy,”
“We were taught that no change is too small,” he shrugs, pouring himself some hot water for tea. “I try to live by that.”
Patrick peers over the back of his plush seat from the seating area, eyes narrowed. After a few moments, he plops back down and leans over to Sha-Mod. “Those two are awfully chummy, aren’t they?”
Sha-Mod adjusts the paper napkin tied over his face. “What? I mean, I guess, but they’re just friends, right?”
“‘Friend’ is just a longer way of saying ‘ally’,”
Sha-Mod takes a moment to count on his fingers. “Oh, yeah. Guess that’s right,”
Patrick puts an arm around Sha-Mod and roughly pulls him closer. “Listen, buddy, you get it. We’re two lone wolves, standing apart from the pack!”
“Um… I guess,”
“I always thought you were the best of the Takes Three,”
“Huh… really? Cause we always agreed McLovin carried. He’s the best at Guitar Hero,”
Patrick grits his teeth and then forces a smile. “Yes. You could go solo if you wanted, they’re holding you back if anything,”
“Really? Cause-”
“That’s not the point! I’m trying to say that you and I should krck them before they krck us,” he says, slashing across his throat with his finger. “The chick will definitely make merge, but the guy’s vulnerable.”
“But Albert is nice,”
“B-but Albert is nice,” Patrick mocks. “That’s what you sound like. You’re the most vulnerable player on the team, since you’re not in an alliance.”
“But you aren’t either!”
“Please,” he says, slicking his hair back. “I’m unexpendable.”
---
PATRICK: “Talking to him is like trying to teach a can of sardines to sing opera,”
---
Mal snaps a quick picture of Bonnie and Max as they sleep beside each other and quickly giggles to herself as she uploads it to her blog.
“Bonmax is so trending on Twitter right now,” she squeals maniacally. “People are having discourse over whether it’s moral or not to ship them, since they’re so mlm/wlw solidarity-coded.”
Ass massages their temples. “I don’t know what any of those words mean. Stop talking to me,”
“Isn’t it weird to ship them since they’re both in relationships?” Courtney asks, yawning. "I mean, rpf is-"
“As if. It’s called fanon interpretation,” Mal crosses her arms. “My mutual is a total Maxulia shipper and he’s got like 1.3k followers.”
“A WHAT?” Julia shouts from down the bench.
Across the cabin, Staci stretches and turns to the rest of the team, who are still fast asleep.
---
STACI: “Okay, so, a part of my undergrad program is about leadership- I was hoping to take the hit points by really overcompensating on my participation and my exams, but... maybe this show would be good practice,”
---
“Up, up, rise and shine!” she shouts, pacing up and down the bench and clapping their hands. “Let’s load up on breakfast and then hit the books for strategy!”
“Hm?” Kelly mumbles, half-awake.
“What books?” Max asks, rubbing his eyes. “The Art of War?”
“That’s an excellent suggestion,” Staci says, bouncing a pointing stick in their hand.
---
STACI: “So, in most groups, everyone will assume the role of a communication maintainer- but since our team is so divided, I’m just going to try to do all of them before everyone gets on board. First up: Social-Emotional,”
---
“Does anyone have any more ideas? I’m all ears!”
“Ooh, me! I do! I have lots of ideas!” Phillip says, picking up his notebook and rushing over. “Do you want to hear a poem?”
“I would love to!” Staci smiles, watching as Phillip leafs through several crude crayon gore drawings to get to the poems.
“Who died and made her queen?” Max grumbles. Bonnie elbows him and he rolls his eyes.
---
MAX: “Okay, admittedly, I haven’t exactly been picking up the slack here. But who could blame me? This team is hopeless! Besides, I have… other things to worry about,”
---
“Good morning, passengers! We’ll be landing in about twenty minutes, so buckle in and hold on tight!” Chris shouts.
Everyone who’s up scrambles back to their seats and straps in as the plane begins nose-diving, much to everyone’s horror. Bonnie and Max hold onto each other as they head straight down, and Mal makes sure to get and upload and picture before returning to screaming with the rest of the cast.
At the last second, Chef pulls up and the plane lands smoothly on the tarmac and the doors open with a hiss.
The morning is crisp, cloudy, and chilled as everyone steps down the rickety stairs and onto the pavement.
“No amount of first class perks will ever make up for these landings,” Sha-Mod says, rubbing his back.
Patrick follows him out, cracking his neck and grinding his teeth.
“Welcome one, welcome all, to Wales!” Chris says, gesturing to the rolling green hill behind him.
Mal looks from side-to-side. “Where?”
“Here, you idiot,” Ass snaps, putting their hands on their hips.
“No, where are the whales?”
Courtney sighs and pinches the bridge of their nose. Julia just rolls her eyes.
“Nice team you’ve got there, sweetheart!” Patrick yells from across the tarmac. She grits her teeth.
---
PATRICK: “Now that Julia and I are back to sworn enemies, we make quite the pair of rivals. I mean- she’s her team’s leader, I’m my team’s leader, she’s cunning, I’m brilliant, she’s decent, I’m gorgeous… like a match made in Hell,”
---
“Wales?! We’re only an hour from my grandma's house!” Sha-Mod says merrily, jumping with joy.
Michela raises an eyebrow. “You’re from Wales?”
“No, England is right over… there, somewhere,” he gestures vaguely off into the distance. Michela shrugs.
“Your first stop is Cardiff. To make things a little more fun- for me- we decided to make it a little scavenger hunt,” Chris says, pulling out three slips of paper. “These will have the clue to your next location.”
“Um,” Courtney says, reading Team Yaoi’s slip. “Are these-?”
“These are in WELSH!” Ass says. “None of us can read this!”
“Too bad,” Chris shrugs. “Shoulda thought of that before you came to Wales, huh?”
“YOU BROUGHT US HERE!”
“Beautiful language, isn’t it? I love the use of W's. Well, see you at your next stop!” the host says, waving goodbye and walking into the plane. Ass groans.
Julia sighs and ropes in the team. “Okay, so Mal can run Google Translate on her phone. That’ll give us a head start, but we gotta stick together, okay?”
Courtney looks up to Mal, who’s happily typing away. “Where did Mal get a phone? I thought I trashed hers back in Chicago?”
“I think she steals them, but that’s not important. Let’s just avoid fighting. That’s all I ask of you,”
Staci watches the scuffle from afar and shakes her head, grinning.
---
STACI: “Authoritarian much? Everyone knows you catch more flies with honey than vinegar,”
---
“Okay, team, let’s all go around in a circle and brainstorm. I wanna hear ideas from everyone,” Staci says sweetly. “Kelly, why don’t you start?”
“Maybe it’s a code. Ooh, does anyone here speak hieroglyphs?”
“That’s a great point, Kelly. Does anyone here speak hieroglyphs?”
Max grits his teeth.
“No one? Okay, Bonnie?”
“I can get back in the plane and grab my tablet. If I can connect to the internet, we can-”
A loud whoosh and a strong current of air blows past the group as the plane takes off. Bonnie sighs. “Okay. I’m out,”
“Max?”
“Murder-suicide,”
“Okay, well, I’m not sure that’s very helpful, but thank you for sharing,” Staci says. “Phillip?”
“I actually had a dream about this once, except I was in an airport that was also a petting zoo, and it was in China but everyone was speaking in Arabic, and I had to get to the pretzel stand but no one could hear me because I was invisible,” he pauses once he notices everyone’s blank expressions. “I have prophetic dreams, by the way.”
---
PHILLIP: “They all hate me,”
---
“And then I was suddenly in my grandma’s house, but the dishwasher was in the bedroom, and my buddy Eric's Uncle Dale was there, and then-”
“Okay, ENOUGH,” Max says. “Let’s just find someone and ask.”
“Now there’s an idea! I knew this would work eventually,” Staci claps. Max glares at her.
---
MAX: "Staci's always been a little high on her own fumes. Which is to say, completely and utterly detached from anything that resembles reality,"
---
Team Mojo trudges through Cardiff, Michela leading the rest of the group behind her like a mother duck and a line of ducklings. She holds up their slip of paper to street signs, restaurant names, and any Welsh she can find.
“Anything yet?” Patrick says. “I didn’t do my 4k gold face mask last night and I’m feeling puffy.”
“Calm down, your royal highness,” Michela snaps. “Unless you have a better idea?”
Sha-Mod scratches his chin, looking around the city. A strong breeze blows past them, pulling off Sha-Mod’s face napkin. He screams in terror and runs after it.
“We lost him again,” Albert says, turning as Sha-Mod runs off.
“He’ll find his way back. He’s like a pigeon,” Michela murmurs, walking ahead.
---
SHA-MOD: “Two seasons ago, I said that I would never show my face on TV- and I meant it! I have withstood lakes, small, vicious animals- Scary included- explosions, and hurricanes- I guess the stress of being alone this season was just too sha-much for Lightning,”
---
Sha-Mod walks back in frame with a bag of chips tied around his face. Patrick rolls his eyes.
“Hey, guys! We found a match!” Michela says, bringing the group back towards her. She holds up the paper under a sign off in the distance. “National Museum Cardiff, up ahead!”
---
“I think I’m doing pretty well,” Staci says, leading the group behind her as they walk through the city. Kelly nods. “You’re doing great!”
“We’ll have this team put back together in no time!” she says confidently. “Just a little Social-Emotional nurturing, and I’ll bring together a safe and welcoming environment. That’s the first step- I learned it in communications class.”
“Wow, impressive! College must be fun,”
“It is, I’m learning a lot. Honors is tough, but I’m tougher, right?” they grin. “That’s what my mom says.”
Kelly nods. Max rolls his eyes from behind them.
---
KELLY: “Watching our little friend group grow has been a real treat- I know not everyone gets to do that. Austin is in a relationship, Staci is in university, and I’m… well, I’m here!”
---
“Miserable,” Max mutters, kicking a rock along the road. He sighs loudly. Bonnie tries to ignore him. Then, he sighs again. Louder. Bonnie grits their teeth. He sighs again, groaning a little this time, and they finally give in.
“Okay, fine. What’s up?”
“It’s about… well, you-know-who,”
“Figures,” they mutter. “What now?”
Max fidgets with his tie and looks at the ground. “I was given an… anonymous tip… to watch out for them. For him, I mean,”
“An ‘anonymous’ tip, huh?”
He shrugs them off. “Unimportant. I just don’t get why she’s being so distant about it,”
“You trust her?”
“Yes, yes, of course, but… at the same time, do I?” Max thinks aloud. “I want to. It just feels like she’s keeping something from me. I can’t stand being lied to.”
Bonnie grumbles to themselves and then sighs. “I’m… sorry, I guess. What’s your damage? I mean, what’s your deal? I mean… you get what I mean,”
He shifts slightly. “Michela isn’t the first person I’ve been with,”
“Huh. You don’t say,” Bonnie scans him over, raising an eyebrow. “Well… I’m all ears and no lips. The only person I’d tell is stuck in a studio in Toronto.”
“I went to a pretty religious private school. My family isn’t Christian, but it was top in the province, so… well, you know,” he says, looking at his feet. “Before I… um, looked like this, there was a girl I used to see. She couldn’t tell anyone, obviously,” he rolls his eyes. “But it was like she couldn’t tell me anything, either. I guess it was embarrassment, or something, but it was always distance and secrets with her. I could never figure out if she was upset and lying, or being honest, or implying something, and no matter what I did it was always the wrong thing… I’m not an oblivious person,” he insists, pointing sharply. “But I’m not always good at this romance thing. I guess it just makes me paranoid now.”
“Well, damn,” Bonnie says. “So, you don’t think Michela is lying but your train of thought is-”
“Working overtime to convince me she is,” he sighs. “I know it’s irrational but it doesn’t make me sleep any easier.”
“Couldn’t you just talk to her about it?”
Max raises an eyebrow. “Don’t make me pull out the Caesar card again,”
“Okay, but in my defense- not talking about it just forced him and I to spill the beans on live international TV in front of all our friends and peers,” Bonnie says. “Would you rather it be that?”
“I get the point,” he sighs. “I just can’t get this feeling out of my stomach.”
Bonnie lightly punches his shoulder. “We’ll get you there somehow,”
---
“This is the place,” Courtney says, walking up the steps of the National Museum.
The rest of the team hovers behind them, watching cautiously as they approach the large double doors. They reach out a hand and grab the handle. The door doesn’t budge.
Courtney pulls at it again, then turns around. “It’s locked,”
“Try harder,” Ass cups their mouth and shouts.
“How will trying harder unlock a door!”
Julia sighs and steps between the two. “Shut up! Both of you! Chris might be somewhere around here, or this is some kind of… I don’t know, puzzle. But arguing about it just wastes time and destroys my brain cells!”
The team grumbles to themselves as Julia scans the exterior. Ass storms past Courtney and tries the door again.
“You’re not going to open it,” they say, watching with an unamused expression.
Ass struggles, pushing against the floor and leaning back as far as their body will allow them. “It’s just stuck,”
“That’s a funny way to say locked!”
“Not everyone has a weak grip like you, princess!”
Ass roughly yanks the door, shaking it slightly while they and Courtney bicker. After several minutes of scuffling, they release the handle and shout in frustration, kicking the base.
A slip of paper unlodges itself from the crack between the wall and the door and floats to the ground. Ass grins, swiping it off the stone. “There. See?”
“See what? You didn’t open the door!”
Mal types rapidly on her phone and smacks her gum loudly from the base of the stairs. “Ohhhh, yeah. Forgot to mention, Google says the museum is closed on Mondays,”
Courtney and Ass glare. “That information would’ve been helpful BEFORE WE GOT HERE!”
“Whatever,” Julia says, swiping the next clue from Ass’ hands. "Where to next?"
---
“Sheep?” Max asks as the slightly-annoyed local walks off. “We have to-”
“I know, it’s not my favorite either, but it’s what the clue says,” Staci says. “I’m positive you’re gonna do great, Max!”
He blinks.
---
STACI: “The next role is the supporter, which is basically just what it sounds like. Let’s get motivated!”
---
Team Friendship rushes to the ends of the city, meeting a large road leading out into the country. Off to the side, sure enough, are three herds of sheep.
“This is ridiculous,” Bonnie sighs.
“Sheep farming is an important economy, so I’d watch your tone,” Chris says, dropping in on a jetpack and startling the sheep away. “Glad to see you’ve made it this far- you’re just a few hours away from your final destination. While it’s currently in England, many scholars argue that it was first built right here in Wales- you’re going to Stonehenge!
“Thank you for explaining that, Chris,” Staci says sweetly. Her team unanimously gives her odd looks.
“You’re welcome,” the host grins. “Now, I’d get to rounding up your herd and setting off- I hear Team Yaoi is hot on your trail.”
---
“Okay, edge of the city- let’s go!” Michela says, pointing ahead. She and Albert run while Patrick walks casually behind them, picking at his cuticles.
Sha-Mod lingers behind, looking from side to side before hurrying to catch up with the group.
---
SHA-MOD: “Who am I without Lightning? Without Takes Three?! Am I anyone? AM I STILL SHA-FABULOUS?”
---
Team Yaoi arrives just as Team Friendship sets off, leading two other herds of sheep behind them. The four look between each other nervously.
“Okay, it’s just some sheep. We can do this,” Courtney says, picking up a stick off the ground and waving it around. “Get! Get! Come on!”
“That is so not how you do that,” Ass crosses their arms. Julia shakes her head and sighs. “We need a herding dog, or something,”
The two stop and turn to Mal behind them.
---
“Yeah, I don’t know if this is really for me,” Patrick says, chuckling to himself as he watches Michela try to get their sheep's attention. “I’m more of a wolf, not much of a dog, if you know what I mean.”
Michela snorts. “You’re more like an inbred cat with IBS, but sure! Now, move it!”
Albert tries using a stick to guide them, but the sheep graze on, unbothered. He shrugs to her, and she groans.
“I don’t get it. I’m trying everything I learned about,” he says, tossing the stick behind him. A few sheep bleat nervously and walk away. “What! What am I doing wrong?! Animals like me!”
“Maybe these sheep are just neurotic?” Michela mutters. Patrick smirks.
Seconds later, Sha-Mod comes tumbling out of the city behind them, landing chips-first on the ground. When he stands, the plastic bag is deflated and partially open, and crispy potato wedges are falling from the top.
Sha-Mod sits up, groaning, and sees the entire herd surrounding him. He shrieks.
“No! No, it’s okay! They want the food!” Albert says cautiously while he and Michela watch with wide eyes. “Get up very, very slowly, and walk towards us.”
Patrick chuckles. “You’ve got to be kidding. These dumb animals won’t hurt you! If anything, you need to assert your dominance as the more intelligent species through fear! Watch,” he storms over to an ewe, shaking his fist at them. “Listen here, lesser species. I have the upper hand, and I-”
The sheep bleats and walks over to him, nuzzling against his pant leg. A few join afterwards, going in circles around his legs and playfully nipping at him. He screams in terror. “GET THEM OFF ME!”
“No! They like you!” Michela palms her forehead and then whisper-shouts. “Don’t scare them! Walk over here, slowly!”
Patrick whimpers in fear and edges forward, shuffling his feet towards Michela. Albert watches in horror.
---
ALBERT: “All those hours studying, camping with wildlife, volunteering at free-range farms- and it’s Patrick who’s the better shepherd. This is… what’s happening to me?”
---
Patrick finally reaches Michela and throws himself in her arms, crying. She rolls her eyes and pats his back. “There, there. They’re not going to hurt you,”
“Do they bite?” he asks shakily.
“No,” Albert says from afar. He turns to Sha-Mod, who’s still surrounded by the rest of the herd. “Let’s go.”
---
Team Yaoi walks alongside each other, panting as the day wears on.
“Wish we could ride these useless things,” Ass mutters. “What are they even good for?”
A sheep angrily bleats at them and they back off. Courtney rolls their eyes and leans in to pet one. “I dunno, I think they’re kinda sweet,”
“Whatever,” they murmur in response, earning another eye roll from Courtney.
Julia hangs at the back of the group, watching the two up front. Mal darts into frame for a moment, running around her ankles and barking before circling the group once again.
The sound of laughter and sheep appears from behind the team and Julia turns a bit to catch a glimpse of Team Mojo following them up the crest, sheep in line and following Sha-Mod and Patrick in the front.
The latter grins and waves as they pass by. “See you at the finish line, sweetie!”
Julia grimaces, but waits til the team disappears up ahead to make comment.
“I hate that guy,”
“What’s your deal with him, anyway?” Courtney asks. Mal pops up out of nowhere, covered in grass and dirt, and states matter-of-factly: “Exes. Messy breakup, but even messier relationship,” and then she ducks back to the ground to run around the herd again.
Julia rolls her eyes. “Yes, thank you, Mal,”
“Ooh, fun. Any juicy gossip to share?” Ass asks, crossing their arms and grinning.
“Well, I-”
The familiar ringing of the song bell sounds and she grits her teeth. “No way am I going to-”
“It’s sing or lose!” Chris says, popping into frame on his jetpack. “And from the looks of it, your team can’t risk losing you. So get singing! Oh, and for the challenge, why don’t we throw some Welsh in there?”
Julia palms her forehead and sighs. “I love Wales in the springtime, rwy’n caru Wales in the fall,”
“Good job, Jules, keep it up!” Courtney cheers on.
“It’s the country of love in the summer, but now it’s just a bummer! Cause-”
Far up ahead, Patrick clears his throat. “Julia broke my heart and chewed it up and spit it out and then stepped on it and threw it down a sewer and called it names and then laughed!”
Michela rolls her eyes.
“Oes, my friends, you must never trust a girl!”
Julia goes on front behind. “Oes, my friends, he’ll make you wanna hurl!”
“Oes, my friends, she will,” Patrick pauses to take a deep breath. “Break your heart and chew it up and spit it out and step on it and throw it down a sewer and call it names, and then laugh!”
“Oh, brother,” Michela mutters. Albert nods in agreement.
Far ahead of them, Team Friendship picks up with Staci: “Oes, my friends! We are gonna make it through!”
Max grits his teeth as their sheep run off again. “Um, no, my “friend”, we just lost another ewe,”
Back to Julia: “Oes, my friends, I’m telling it to you,”
“Oes, my friends, now I’m telling you the truth,” Patrick says up ahead.
Julia takes a deep breath. “If you date a boy you met on TV and then break up with him, and then break up with him again, and then finally actually break up with him, even though you were nothing but nice, you will still-”
Patrick picks up as the tempo changes. “We end up on TV! She won’t even see me! And the girl won’t even admit I dumped her FIRRRRST!”
“Is it over?” Michela asks, holding her head. Albert nudges her. “We lost Sha-Mod again.”
She grabs his arm weakly. “Can you please. I feel sick,”
Albert looks around her to where Patrick is humming to himself and leading the herd. “I don’t know if I’d feel good about myself leaving you with him,”
“I’ll be fine. Just go deal with Sha-Mod,”
He sighs, but walks off anyway.
---
Team Friendship arrive first at Stonehenge, despite their sheep going AWOL around them. As soon as they reach the finish line, Max collapses in the fetal position on the floor.
“YAYYYY, we did it!” Staci pumps her fist. “Go, team!”
Kelly squeals and claps their hands. Phillip watches as Bonnie sits down next to Max’s lifeless body and pokes him with a stick until he moves.
“Do we win something,” the goth asks, balancing their head in the palms.
Chris, sitting in a plush chair and enjoying a cup of tea, shrugs. They grumble to themselves. Team Yaoi arrives next, looking around.
“I guess we lost them,” Julia says with barely-restrained joy.
---
JULIA: “Would Patrick being gone solve all my problems? No. But it’d be sooooo satisfying, wouldn’t it?”
---
“I guess you did, but we can’t do the next part of your challenge without all teams available, sooooo…” Chris says. “Time to wait!”
The teens groan.
---
“Sha-Mod!” Albert yells, wandering the rolling green plains. “Sha-Mod? God, how can anyone get lost out here? There’s nothing!”
He takes a step forward and hears a loud crunch. He winces. “Please don’t be a snail,”
“Nah, just me,”
Albert looks down and sighs in relief. He lifts his shoe off the bag of chips and steps off of Sha-Mod, who’s buried in the dirt below him. “Dude. You have to get up and come back to the team,”
“Why should I? I’m no one,”
“You- okay, you have to get up. I can’t talk to you when you’re like this,”
Sha-Mod rises from his shallow grave and sighs. The bag of chips slips off his face and is carried off in the breeze, and he shrieks. “My crisps!”
“Here,” Albert says, taking off his windbreaker and tossing it over Sha-Mod’s head. “Now let’s go.”
Sha-Mod crosses his arms and turns his head, the windbreaker swaying. “No,”
“Why not?”
“I’m no one. No one needs me,”
Albert takes a long, deep breath. “Okay. Fine. What’s wrong?”
“I lost my Lightning,” he sniffles. “I’m no one under that picture.”
“That’s not true. You have a face,” he pauses. “You… you do have a face, don’t you?”
“A dumb one,” he cries.
Albert shakes his head and sits down next to him. “I guess I know how you feel. I’ve been feeling like a failure lately, too. A nobody,”
“Did you also go on a reality TV show for three seasons without showing your face and then realize no one really knows you?”
“Um… no. I just meant more in a symbolic sense,” Albert says, raising an eyebrow. “I just lost my job, my whole life. I don’t really know who I am without it.”
“Oh, I see. I guess I get it. Lightning was my job,”
“Your job was… Lightning?”
Sha-Mod nods. “Now who am I? A sweaty windbreaker?”
“It’s not… never mind,” he mutters. “So, you don’t want to show your face, but you also don't-don’t want to show your face?”
He nods.
“Okay. Makes sense,” Albert murmurs. “What’re you afraid of?”
“Well, originally I did it because I didn’t want my likeness to be on international TV in front of millions of people, but eventually I just couldn’t take it off! It was like a part of me… now, who am I without it?”
“You’re Sha-Mod. I mean, whatever your real name is,” Albert says. “You’re not a piece of paper.”
---
ALBERT: “There are a lot of things I’ve said today that I’d never imagined myself saying before. And yet, they make perfect sense. What is wrong with this show,”
---
Sha-Mod sniffles. “Or a windbreaker?”
“Or a windbreaker,” Albert says reassuringly. “Maybe it’s time to face the world, Sha-Mod. Show us the real you.”
“Um… I don’t know. I think I’m just going to keep this on. I like it,” he says, standing. “Let’s get back to the team.”
Albert sighs, but stands and follows anyway.
---
Team Mojo arrives at Stonehenge last, trudging themselves and their sheep behind them.
“FINALLY!” Ass snaps. “We thought you got eaten by… whatever lives out here!”
“British people,” Kelly whispers. Staci nods.
“Welcome one, welcome all to the final round of your Great British Race-Off!” Chris says, then leans into Chef to whisper. “We’re allowed to use that, right?” Hatchet shrugs.
“Your final task is simple- a delicious, traditional British feast in front of the scenic Stonehenge,” the host goes on as Chef disappears and comes back pushing a table with a few covered dishes. “Each team will select the player with the strongest stomach- last man standing, wins.”
“It’s British food,” Ass puts their hands on their hips. “How bad could it be?”
“Your first dish: Jellied eels!” Chef shouts harshly. “Now eat up!”
Silence. Ass blinks. “I volunteer Mal,”
“I second that!” Courtney says. Julia shrugs.
“Um, so… who’s gonna…” Kelly asks slowly. “Cause I’m on a vegetarian diet this week!”
Max rolls his eyes. “Convenient. I say we make the prince of darkness over there do it,” he jabs his thumb backwards to where Phillip is cowering in fear from the rays of sunlight coming out from between the clouds.
“I wouldn’t mind that,” Bonnie crosses their arms. Phillip shouts Hey! Before scampering behind Chef for shade.
“C’mon, guys! We can reach a solution that makes everyone happy if we work together!” Staci says. The team glares between each other.
---
STACI: “Role number three: Harmonizer. Preventing and mediating conflict. I can do that, no problem… right?”
---
“Okay, if no one else wants to… I’ll do it,”
No one on Team Friendship argues, much to Staci’s horror. Across the lawn, Team Mojo isn’t faring much better.
“It can’t be me. I’m vegan!” Albert says, raising his hands defensively.
Patrick grumbles. “I have a fragile palette,”
“I’m British intolerant,” Michela says.
As the three bicker, a hero emerges from the fog. “I’ll do it,”
Everyone turns. Patrick holds back a laugh. “You’ll do it?”
“I’ll do it! It won’t phase me!” Sha-Mod insists. “I’m immune! And thanks to my new best friend, Albert-” Michela turns to Albert with a raised eyebrow. He shrugs and mouths talk later. “-I know I can do anything I set my mind to, with or WITHOUT my sha-swag!”
Team Mojo stares for a few moments before Patrick shrugs. “Better him than me. Go get ‘em, tiger!”
---
Sha-Mod, Staci, and Mal sit side-by-side at the long table, staring at their uncovered platter of gelatin and eels.
“Mmmm, eel-icious!” Chris chuckles. “You’ll get five whole courses of delicious, top-tier British dining. The last man standing- or alive- wins first class and immunity for his-or-her-or-their team. Ready?”
Sha-Mod nods confidently. Mal scrolls through her phone. Staci is pale.
“Dig in!”
Sha-Mod starts off courageously, shoveling in forkfuls of eel. Mal chews casually, typing something with her free hand.
Staci pokes at the meal with her fork.
“Come on, we don’t have all day!” Max shouts. Kelly elbows him.
“You’ve got this, girl!”
Staci smiles nervously, and then takes a very slow, very cautious bite. She immediately gags and coughs. Albert winces from nearby. “I don’t know if I can watch this,”
After a grueling ten minutes (most of which was waiting for Staci to finish) Chef rolls out the next course. “Black pudding, a staple of the classic English breakfast,”
Staci sighs with relief. “You know, pudding actually sounds good,”
“Oh… noooo…” Sha-Mod mutters. Their smile drops.
Chef pulls off the silver covers on their dishes, revealing black hockey-puck like pellets. “Pig’s blood and fat, a la mode,”
Albert goes pale and turns around.
---
ALBERT: “I don’t have a problem with other people eating meat. When it’s, you know, not condensed into a black disk and made of blood,”
---
Sha-Mod tears into his pudding like a wild animal. Staci squirms and looks back and forth between their plate and their team behind them. Kelly gives them a thumbs up. Max rolls his eyes.
By the time Sha-Mod and Mal finish, Staci takes her first bite.
“Course number three: dressed tripe! While its popularity has wavered since the Victorian era, some places still enjoy this yummy meal of boiled and bleached stomach lining,”
Sha-Mod is beginning to cough and wheeze as he barrels through each platter. Staci is gagging between each bite. Max rolls his eyes.
---
MAX: “Better her than me, but at the same time: I’m glad to see little miss perfect isn’t such a genius, after all. Her little dream of leading the team is cute, but come on- she’s the human equivalent of a marshmallow,”
---
Mal slurps up each bite with ease, popping in a pair of earbuds to watch YouTube while she eats. Team Yaoi watches, bewildered.
---
MAL: “I’m used to eating whatever I can find. For the last six days of my fifth annual One Piece binge, I survived on canned tuna from the Cold War era and rainwater,”
---
“Next up, pork pies!”
“Oh, that doesn’t sound too bad,” Staci says, looking to Sha-Mod. He shrugs. Chef rolls out a thick pie, full of pink meat and she whimpers. “I-I don’t know if I can…”
“Don’t you dare lose!” Max shouts. “You need to set a good example for the team!”
She frowns and takes a cautious bite. Albert, now a sickly shade of green, leans on Patrick’s shoulder for support. He quickly swats him off and Max grins as Albert lands in the grass. “How’s it taste, Staci!”
“Bad!” she shouts back. “It’s too much meat!”
Albert groans.
---
“Well, well, well. I’m impressed!” Chris says, pacing between the three. “Not a single chicken yet. Since you’re all still here, we’re making this a race to the end!”
Chef brings out the final platters, setting them before each player. “First player to finish wins! Welcome to your final round- stargazey pie!”
“Aww, that’s so cute! Are they shaped like little stars?” Kelly asks.
The host grins widely. “Not… exactly,”
Chef pulls off the silver covers and reveals three perfectly normal pies- but each is full of fish heads gazing towards the sky. Staci goes pale.
“Ready? Set? Eat!”
Mal twirls her fork around her fingers and takes a deep bite without looking away from her blog. Staci swallows deeply and begins cutting up the meal while Sha-Mod peers down at it from under the windbreaker.
“Sh-Sha-Mod!” Albert says from the ground. “My coat! Please don’t get anything on… my coat…” and then he faints again.
Sha-Mod pauses and thinks for a moment. Then, he stands.
“You’re right, I don’t need this anymore!” he says.
Patrick holds up a finger. “I don’t think that’s what he meant,”
Sha-Mod ignores him. “It’s time to stop hiding. I don’t need to be anyone but myself!”
He tears off the windbreaker, tossing it to the side. Everyone gasps as Sha-Mod reveals himself to be… a perfectly average white boy.
“Are you kidding me!” Ass shouts.
Sha-Mod takes a deep breath. “It feels good to breathe. And I can finally see you guys!”
Michela massages her temples. Patrick shakes his head sadly.
“All this time, I’ve been hiding- initially, I was afraid of being seen humiliating myself- but I think I was just afraid of being myself. Well, I’m not afraid anymore. I’m Sha-Mod, and I’m going to win this thing!”
A loud ding rings out and the camera pans over to Mal, who’s just finished her meal. She pushes the plate back and posts a Tweet.
“And Team Yaoi has won… again!” Chris says. “Since Sha-Mod’s plate is untouched, we’ll be seeing Team Mojo at the elimination ceremony.”
Team Yaoi cheers. Once the fanfare has died down, Julia grins and waves goodbye to Patrick.
---
JULIA: “Now, all I have to do is convince the team that Patrick has got to go. Not that it’d be hard. I mean… look at him,”
---
Julia peers around the corner of first class, looking both ways before creeping down the hall. She stops outside the bathroom confessional and waits for a moment before Albert walks out.
She grabs him by the windbreaker and quickly covers his mouth, looking around for witnesses again before pulling him away. “We’ve gotta talk,”
“I don’t have anything to say to you,” he whispers sharply.
“Shut up. Listen, I think we can all agree that Patrick is doing nothing but being a big baby drama queen, as per usual,” she says. “I want him gone. You want him gone. Your little girlfriend wants him gone. This is a no-brainer.”
Albert raises an eyebrow. “What do you get out of this?”
“Satisfaction,” she scoffs. “I know Patrick. If you don’t get him first, he’ll get you.”
Julia releases him and walks off quickly.
From around the corner, Patrick glares.
---
“Team Mojo- not looking too great, huh?”
The four remaining players look between each other. Chris continues. “Michela, you’re safe. Albert, you too,”
“Patrick- you’re not exactly a fan favorite here. And Sha-Mod, your revelation cost your team the win,” he goes on. Patrick smirks and crosses his arms tightly. Sha-Mod looks nervous, his expression visible for the first time. “Patrick….
You’re safe. Sorry, Sha-Mod.”
“What?” Michela asks, standing. “That’s impossible, we all voted for Patrick!”
Chris shrugs. “Hey, I just count the votes. Don't shoot the messenger,”
Albert guides Michela back down to her seat. Patrick looks back. “Some team, huh?”
“Why are you surprised! We hate you!” Albert hisses. Patrick glares.
“Well… I had fun,” Sha-Mod says, strapping on the chute. “Thank you, Albert. My boyfriend and I’ll write a song about you!”
Albert forces a smile and a double thumbs-up. Sha-Mod walks to the plane door, salutes, and jumps out backwards. “Don’t forget to pre-order our Christmas albuuuuuuum,”
“What an exit,” Chris says. “Well, off to the hot tub!” and with that, he leaves the contestants in the cabin. Patrick stands shortly after, making glaring eye contact with both Albert and Michela, and then disappears.
Albert glares back.
---
ALBERT: “I had a sort of... revelation today. Sha-Mod is right- everyone’s hiding behind some kind of mask. While his was… well, literal, mine was my job. And now that it’s gone, all I’m left with is me,” a long pause follows, and he smiles widely. “I guess what I’m saying is that no one is prepared for what’s coming.”
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Here is my personal ranking of all the seasons:
Total Drama All Stars. Best season. Great concept, with it being an all star season. Great cast, with Sam being one of my favorites that season. Gave us Mal, my favorite antagonist. Everyone that season had amazing writing.
Total Drama Pahkitew Island. Loved the new cast, with Leonard being my person favorite. Skave is also one of my favorite ships, and Scax isn't too far behind from them. I love the new Island, and every character felt perfect.
Total Drama Action. Beth is my favorite finalist, and I believe she deserved her win. Also, Duncney and Gidgette in this season are amazing. Plus, Heather gets voted out early, and she is one of my least favorite characters. Very happy that happened.
The Ridonculous Race. It gave us Nemma, ending the argument that was Noah's sexuality, proving once and for all that he is straight. Plus, it gave my favorite, my most yaoitastic ship of all time: Gerry x Pete. I was very upset that they were an early boot. I was even more upset when Leonard was an early boot. It also gave us the Haters/Daters, a great couple to come out from the season. As well as the best friends. I loved the entire "Will they, won't they" story they had going. It did not get annoying att all. The thing the brings this season down though is the fact that Don is the host. He is not as good as Chris.
Total Drama 2023. New cast. It did give me some new favorites, such as Chase Ripper, Chemma, and Chipper. I do wish we got Rayne instead of Rajbow, and I hope we get a raynebow love triangle next season, as those are always my favorite. I also hope Julia goes bald next season, to match the other seasons with the theme. My favorite episode was epsiode 5, as fart jokes are very funny.
Total Drama World Tour. If I could make it lower, I would. The only saving grace of this season was Gwuncan becoming canon. Aleheather is my least favorite couple from the entire season. They are poorly written, bad at romance, and neither of them deserved their spot in the final 2. Cody and Duncan should've been the final 2, giving us a great yaoi-off to end a horrible season.
Total Drama Revenge of the Island. 2 words: New cast. From the very start, I was not interested in the new cast. All though some of them looked interesting, they got an early boot. I wish Staci made the finale, the finale that was got was one of the worst ones out there. Scott is the worst villain. They should've put more emphasis on the toxic waste. I will give props to the Dakota plot line though. My favorite from the season.
Total Drama Island. Horrible. What a horrible way to introduce a new IP. The characters were at their absolute worst this season. I don't care about the camp vibe. It's boring. It's bad. Ezekiel should not have gotten voted out episode 1. He should have won. It's just. Boring.
If you want more details about anything, essentially send them through my inbox.
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My Stardew Valley OC's ship lore
Been wanting to do this one for a while! Sorry if it's messy, I wrote it straight into tumblr with no planning.
Stacy x Shane
• At first, both didn't really like each other. Stacy was the one who, despite finding socializing difficult, put in the effort to make friends with him.
• During the 2 heart cutscene, Stacy tells him she used to feel hopeless, too. Tells him she's starting to heal, and that he shouldn't give up. He doesn't take the advice to heart.
• During the 4 heart cutscene, Stacy barely speaks. But the look on her face says it all. Worry overflowed her teary eyes. "Hopefully I won't be around long enough to need a 'plan'.." Shane gets slapped across the face. "Don't you dare even think of such a thing!" Tears streamed down Stacy's face. Jas ran to her room, sobbing. None of them had noticed she was listening. Instant regret.
• In a rainy summer evening, Stacy was heading back to the farm though Cindersap Forest. She stumbled upon a trail of beer cans and ran along it, desperation starting to make it's way into her heart. The trail led to the cliff edge where Shane was.
"Stacy... I-I'm sorry..." Shane said, between hiccups. "My life... It's a pathetic joke...Look at me..." Stacy kneeled in front of him, not knowing what to do. "Why do I even try?" Shane questioned, sobbing. "I'm too small and stupid to...to take control of my own life... I've been coming here often...looking down... But I'm too scared, just like always..." Stacy gripped his hand. She felt a knot in her throat as he continued. "Stacy...All I do is work, sleep and drink...to...to dull the feelings of self-hatred. Why should I even go on? T-Tell me why I shouldn't roll off this cliff right now..."
Stacy recalled the time when she didn't feel like enough, when she worked until she passed out, when she didn't have anyone to talk to, when nobody seemed to care. Choosing her words carefully, she told him what she would have wanted to hear back then:
"The decision is yours. Just know that I'm here and I always will be, and that you can count on me for whatever."
Shane's teary eyes widened. "Thanks...I appreciate that...I really do." he paused. "...I think you should take me to the hospital now."
With great difficulty, Stacy carried an unconscious Shane to Harvey's office.
Suzy x Alex
• They bonded over gridball literally in their first meeting. Great friendship material.
• A few weeks after moving in, Suzy decided she deserved a break and went to the beach. It seemed someone else had gotten there first, though.
"Oh, hi. Suzy, right?" Alex asked.
"Yup. What are you up to?" Suzy responded. "Just enjoying this great weather." he paused. "Hey, go long!"
Suzy took a few steps back, and caught the ball Alex threw.
"Nice catch!" he said.
"Your throw was great!" she complimented back.
"Thanks. You know, I'm gonna be the first professional gridball player from Stardew Valley...There's no doubt in my mind."
Suzy looked at Alex, who was now staring onto the horizon.
"I already led my school's team to the regional playoffs... Now I'm just training so I can get a spot on the roster of the Zuzu City Tunnelers. You just wait!"
Smiling fondly, Suzy said:
"I believe in you."
"Thanks, Suzy. I'll remember that."
• As they start talking more, they share bodybuilding tips, book suggestions (mostly on Suzy's part), and plans for the future.
• During the 4 heart cutscene, Suzy was shocked. She had never imagined what Alex had been through.
"You seem like someone I can trust...That's why I'm telling you this, Suzy. I don't want any sympathy. If there's anything good about my past, is that it's made me strong."
She pat his back as she said:
"That it sure did."
"Now, let me show you what Dusty will do for a barbecued steak." he chuckled, holding a large piece of meat in front of the drooling dog, who was clearly super excited.
• "Oh, hello dear! How have you been?" Evelyn said, as Suzy stepped in through the front door after a few knocks.
"I'm alright! Things on the farm are going pretty well. How have you and George been?" Suzy replied.
"Thank you for asking, dear. We're doing well! What brings you here today?"
"See, I found these leeks while foraging and thought I'd drop by to give you some." Suzy said, taking out a few leeks from her backpack and gently placing them on the kitchen counter. "I also haven't seen Alex in a while. Is he here?"
"Oh, yes, he's just in his room! You can go right ahead. Thank you for the leeks, dear!" Evelyn responded.
"No prob!" Suzy said, turning to the corridor in front of the entrance.
Reaching the end, she knocked on the door to her right.
"Come in!" Alex said.
He was standing in front of the bookshelf in his room, looking a little gloomy.
"What's wrong, Alex?" Suzy asks.
Alex sighed. "Look at all these books... I haven't read a single one of them..." He picked a random book off the shelf, examining it's cover.
"But I guess you can't make a living in this world if you don't have brains..." Alex said, putting the book where it was originally.
"...I'm worthless."
Suzy looked at him with a mixture of disbelief and sympathy. She took a deep breath and said:
"Listen, man. Everyone's got their strenghts and weaknesses. Just because you're not good at one thing doesn't mean you're worthless." She placed her hands on his broad shoulders.
"I've seen your skills with that gridball, and they're on par with the pros. You could make it into the Zuzus if you tried." She said, letting out a smile.
"And if that doesn't work out- guess what? You got me here to help you out with studying, job hunting and whatnot!" Suzy complemented.
If he doesn't marry you, that is. (Stop it!)
"...Thanks, Suzy." He said, his eyes sparkling in that way she loves so much. "I mean it. You're a great friend." He now had a warm smile upon his face.
"Thanks. I try to be." She let go of his shoulders, turning her gaze to the ground as she smiled and her cheeks turned a little red.
#stardew valley#sdv#sdv alex#sdv ocs#stardew valley oc#farmer suzy#farmer stacy#alex mullner#shane sdv#sdv shane#stardew valley shane#stardew shane#shane stardew valley#alex stardew valley#stardew alex#oc lore
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