Heartfirst: A Ted Lasso Story - Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fourteen: All That You Are
Plot: A chaotic press conference precedes a match that ends in violence.
Word Count: 5.2k
Warnings: f!reader, language, minor violence
A/N: I’m gonna chalk this week’s chapters up to having some free time and also being really motivated to get to the next few. Phew, let me tell you…this is the last chance I’m giving y’all to breathe. The final act kicks off in the next chapter and we don’t stop till the very end…so everybody enjoy the fluff and the jokes while you’ve got them 🙃
Let me know if you’d like to be tagged and, as always, enjoy!
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AFC Richmond’s hot streak just…kept…going.
They were killing it, both at matches and training. More importantly, they were happy. Joyful, even. Which meant everyone else was too.
More and more fans started showing up to watch training till eventually, the stands were packed. Y/n had begun to come out more often, genuinely enjoying watching the boys practice, and had found a way to make it a PR matter. She helped get the crowd riled up, engaging with them and encouraging them to cheer and chant for their players. She’d collected whatever merchandise they had a surplus of, pens or coffee mugs usually, and made a game of handing them out to the fans that came. Ted had encouraged her to keep doing it, it only further fostered the atmosphere he wanted to create.
Y/n hurried upstairs one day in particular, having missed the alarm set on her phone while she was hauling a bag of freebies from the gift shop to her office. She was never late and felt like she was going to burst into flames for being so.
“Whoa,” Ted called, just a few steps behind her, “Someone call Allyson Felix. Let her know she better watch her back.”
Y/n hung back on the landing to catch her breath, falling back in step once Ted caught up. “We ran out of the mugs the other day but I’ve got coasters and coozies for this afternoon.”
“Ooh,” Ted exclaimed, “You’ve been killin’ it in the swag department, missy. Everyone’s a little more hyped knowing they get a prize just for participation.”
Y/n grunted, “Trophies for doing nothing is also why my generation hates work, so don’t applaud me yet.”
They entered Rebecca’s office laughing only to find the atmosphere contrasting their good moods. Spread out on the couch, Keeley had her face buried in Rebecca’s lap.
“Uh-oh,” Ted announced his presence, “When girl-talk turns into girl-hug, you know that either means something horrible’s happened, or absolutely nothing at all.”
“Please say nothing at all,” Y/n set her purse down and grabbed the takeaway box Rebecca had ordered for her.
“Jack’s ghosting Keeley,” their boss explained.
“Oh, no,” Ted frowned.
Y/n sunk into the cushion beside Keeley, rubbing her shoulder as the blonde snuggled back under Rebecca’s arm.
“First, she wants to go on a break,” Ted recounted, “And now the old digital Irish goodbye. Which is a term I never really understood. ‘Cause I got a buddy back home named Seamus O’Malley, and that son of a gun hugs folks goodbye for, like, twenty minutes before he leaves anywhere.”
Y/n smiled down at her salad. The last few months may have softened her, but decades could pass and Ted would remain the same.
“Yeah,” he looked to Keeley, “Sorry to hear about that. Hey, I did make you some biscuits, you know, just to soften the blow.”
“Oh, thanks Ted,” Keeley took the pink package from him and opened it. Her eye blew open, “What? There’s like forty quid in here.”
“Well, I didn’t know you were gonna be here till this morning,” Ted explained, “No time to do anything special so I just tossed a little cash in there.”
Keeley nodded, “That is very sweet. Thank you, Ted.”
“Ain’t nothin’ to it but to do it,” he shrugged, turning to Rebecca, “Hey, boss. You mind if I skip the press conference today? Michelle and I got these parent-teacher meetings I don’t wanna miss.”
Rebecca shrugged and smiled, “Of course, Ted. Family first.”
“I appreciate it.”
“So…” Y/n trailed off, “Who’s next in line?”
A metaphorical lightbulb went off over Keeley’s head. “We could have Roy do it,” she suggested, “I know he hates that stuff, but he is really good at it.”
Y/n struggled to see the “good” part of how Roy handled the press. On her last count, he’d cussed out no more than six reporters.
“I mean, you know, fine by me,” Ted replied.
Rebecca agreed, “Great idea.”
“Look at you,” Ted smiled at Keeley, “Heartbroken, but still kickin’ butt.”
“I mean, I’m not heartbroken,” Keeley fidgeted in her seat, “It’s more like heart-bent.”
“Heart-bent,” Ted mused, “I like that. It’s a great title for a country song. You know, like,” he began to sing, “I’m heart-bent, in my apartment, ‘cause all that you left, was your fart scent.”
“Alright. Goodbye, Ted,” Rebecca cued him up to leave, though Keeley was laughing and Y/n was smiling through a bite of spinach.
“And now that you’re gone,” Ted continued on his way out to the hall, “I wrote this song, ‘cause all you left was, the smell of your farts.”
Y/n pointed to the door with her fork, “Speaking on behalf of our homeland, we can do better than that.”
Rebecca snorted and Keeley rested her head on Y/n’s shoulder.
“Right,” she held out her hand, “Show me.”
Keeley handed it over and Y/n bore witness to the mile long chain of texts her boss had sent their boss. It was embarrassing to say the least, but Y/n wasn’t about to kick Keeley when she was already laid out.
“Wow,” she strained as she scrolled.
“I know,” Keeley moaned.
“It’s like a river,” Y/n mused as she surfed the rest of the blue bubbles, “Can you promise one thing?”
Keeley hummed.
Y/n handed her phone back, “No more. She’s the one that stomped on you, she gets to do the groveling.”
And grovel she should. From what Keeley had told Y/n, Jack had handled their conversation regarding the video leak and the so-called “statement” horrifically. Jack seemed offended that Keeley had dared to have a meaningful relationship before her. It was jealousy where jealousy didn’t belong.
Whereas Y/n was still struggling to comprehend Jamie and Keeley ever having been together.
“I won’t, I won’t,” Keeley threw her phone on the other side of the couch, “I’m done.”
“Good,” Y/n nodded firmly.
“And that’s all you’ve got to say?” Keeley asked with a raised brow, “Nothing else?”
Y/n purposefully filled her mouth with a far-too-large bite of lettuce. She had plenty to say on the matter, Keeley knew damn well, but she was determined not to do so unless there was a confirmed break-up. After all, Jack was still their boss.
“Nope,” she mumbled.
Rebecca and Keeley descended into a fit of snorts.
Later, the three women were were seeing Keeley out to her car. Roy was just coming down the hall when they came off the last step.
“Oh, speak of the devil,” Rebecca said.
“Okay,” Roy replied before looking to his ex. An awkward silence came about for three seconds, though it felt like much longer. “Keeley.”
“Roy,” she nodded back to him.
Rebecca, blissfully, pulled them out. “So I need you to fill in for Ted at today’s press conference, if that’s okay.”
Roy didn’t hesitate in his reply, “Fuck no.”
Keeley, Rebecca and Y/n were just as unflinching as they waited for the answer to change.
“I mean,” Roy backtracked, “Why can’t Ted do it?”
His eyes went from woman to woman, waiting for one of them to answer or crack or…something.
Or nothing.
“I mean,” he pasted an unnatural grin to his face, “I’d love to.”
Y/n pointed a finger and nodded.
“Wonderful,” Rebecca replied, looking to Keeley and Y/n, “Shall we?”
The three of them left Roy in the hall, waiting for the inevitable reaction.
“Fuck,” he said rather loudly.
“I heard that,” Rebecca smirked.
“You still have my word,” Y/n remarked to her boss, “Send me up there, I’ll give them all they want to know. Sell everybody out. We’ll be on every front page in the country.”
Rebecca laughed, though Keeley missed it entirely. She was too busy glancing back at Roy.
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Later in the afternoon, with the press conference a few minutes away from starting, Y/n swung by her office to pick up the notes she’d jotted down for Roy.
As she grabbed her notebook, she noticed there was a tea sitting next to her laptop.
She picked it up and examined it. It had come from the café, her name was written on the side in the big loopy handwriting Delilah, the barista, used. Assuming she wasn’t being set up to be poisoned, she took a sip and accepted the anonymous kindness.
Y/n made it down to the press room, meeting Higgins in the back and waiting for Roy to enter.
The door opened, and Beard walked through.
Y/n’s face dropped, “Um…”
“Where’s Ted?” Higgins asked.
“Where’s Roy?” Y/n corrected, “He’s supposed to be filling in.”
Beard took his seat at the desk, “Good afternoon. I know you all were expecting Ted, but he couldn’t make it today. I, however, will be happy to answer any and all questions, so,” he gestured to the desk filled with recorders and phones, “Fire away.”
Y/n took a breath, it wasn’t so bad. Beard, while not always the most sociable, was well-spoken and highly intelligent. He might have even been a better choice than Roy for his mood alone.
She regretted every thinking such a thing within two minutes.
“Look, man,” Beard sat back in the chair, “We can debate all day, Zeppelin versus Eagles, but one thing that is absolutely not up for debate is Walsh versus Page.”
“Oh, come off it,” the man fired back, “You honestly think it’s Walsh over Page?”
Y/n whispered to Higgins, “How did this go so far off the rails this fast?”
“I don’t know,” he replied.
She handed him her tea, “Hold this.”
Y/n quietly and calmly exited the room, breaking into a light jog in the hall and up the stairs. She knocked on Rebecca’s open door but didn’t bother to be invited in.
“Hi,” she greeted quickly, “Um, did something happen to Roy in the two hours since he was last seen?”
Rebecca’s brow lowered, “No, why?”
Y/n thinned her lips to a line, “You might wanna come downstairs.”
Without question, Rebecca followed her down and into the press room. Things had taken another turn in the minute Y/n had disappeared for.
“That is not what I said, Gary,” Beard angrily pointed to the reporter in question.
“I have your quote right here,” Gary chuckled.
“You did say it, Coach,” another on agreed.
“Stay out of this, Lloyd,” Beard snapped.
“Don’t shout at Lloyd,” Sarah, another reporter, said.
Y/n flattened her palm against her forehead.
“You said, and I quote,” Gary looked down at his notes, “‘Joe Walsh is a better guitarist than Jimmy Page.’ That’s what you said!”
Beard leaned back in his chair, exasperated by the fight he’d started. “Fine! I said it,” he spread his arms out in defeat, “But what I meant was that Joe Walsh, underrated. Jimmy Page,” he got stuck on the last word in his rage, “Overrated!”
The room was arguing amongst itself.
“I mean, Joe Walsh is a poet,” Beard went on, “Jimmy Page is a fucking court stenographer on Adderall.”
As the room digested the answer in shock, and amusement, Y/n reached out to Higgins, retaking her tea and taking a large swig as if it were wine.
“Are you out of your mind?” Gary laughed, “Page could beat Walsh with one string.”
“What do you mean, beat him?” Beard replied angrily, “It’s not a competition, man. It’s art, you fucking Neanderthal!”
Y/n, Higgins and Rebecca surged forward at the same time.
“Hello,” Rebecca cheerily announced, trying to draw the attention to herself while Higgins grabbed Beard, who was still arguing with Gary. “Hello! Hello!”
Y/n acted as a shield for Higgins as he walked Beard out of the room, dropping him in the side hall. But not before Beard could get in one last insult.
“‘Stairway to Heaven’” is a glorified fingering exercise, and you all know it!”
Higgins smiled at the press as he shut the door, Y/n blindly reaching behind to help him push against Beard’s weight.
“I can’t think of the last time I was able to be here with all you absolutely…” Rebecca spoke loudly over the noise of Beard still yelling into the door. Y/n and Higgins blocked his face from view. “Just brilliant members of the press down here in the pressroom. So with that in mind, I would love to take some questions. Come on,” Rebecca spread her arms welcomingly, “Absolutely ask me anything.”
“Oh, shit,” Y/n mumbled. This wasn’t any better.
Marcus from The Independent announced himself when Rebecca nodded towards him.
“Hello there, Marcus,” she greeted, “How are you?”
“Very well.”
“Good, good.”
“Miss Welton,” Marcus asked, “In your opinion, who’s the greatest classic rock guitarist of all time?”
Rebecca stuttered a bit, stuck on the question that had her blanking out on any rock she’d ever listened to.
“The, uh…” she struggled, “The…guy from Cream.”
Higgins snorted, Y/n buried her head in her hand as the pressroom quietly and collectively laughed.
“Uh…” Rebecca began.
“I think,” Y/n came to stand beside her boss, grinning abnormally large, “That in the wake of our recent wins, we’re all still a bit hazy from the excitement. I think we’re going to call this for the day, but we’ll be ready and waiting for you after the match this Sunday against Brighton. Thank you so much!”
Y/n placed her hands on Rebecca’s back and marched her towards the door.
“Uh, Ms. Y/l/n,” Marcus spoke up, “Care to comment on who you think the greatest guitarist is?”
“Keith Richards,” Y/n answered, “Purely because he’s still standing.”
Whatever reaction she’d caused, she didn’t hear them. Her and Higgins had gotten Rebecca safely out into the hall.
“Sorry about that,” she shuddered.
“You’re alright,” Y/n patted her shoulder.
“‘The guy from Cream,’” Higgins giggled.
“Yes, all right,” Rebecca twisted to face Higgins, “Don’t start with me, Leslie! I panicked,” she took a seething breath, “I’m going to murder Roy Kent.”
“If you don’t, I will,” Y/n exhaled.
“Look, Roy not doing press is just Roy being Roy,” Higgins stated.
Y/n gestured to the door they’d just come out of, “And look where it got us.”
“Well, I am sick of Roy being Roy,” Rebecca spat, hands on her hips, “So it’s time for Rebecca to be Rebecca.”
Without another word, she marched off in the direction of the training room. The boys would nearly be done with their afternoon workout.
“Oh, yes,” Higgins agreed, “Absolutely- I couldn’t,” he turned with Y/n to watch Rebecca strut away from them, “Yeah. There you go. Yes! Ooh!”
Y/n breathed a laugh, if anyone rubbed off on her from Richmond, she hoped it was Rebecca. There was a fierceness inside her that Y/n had never possessed in her life, but she’d have liked to.
“Stay for the aftermath?” Higgins asked.
“Oh, definitely,” Y/n nodded. She wasn’t going to miss the opportunity to stare down Roy.
Quick enough, Rebecca marched back up the stairs, Roy following thirty seconds later. While Higgins’ best frown was still his worst smile, Y/n glared at the coach unflinchingly. He did his best to ignore them both on the way up to Rebecca’s office.
“Another day,” Y/n mumbled, her and Higgins heading their separate ways for the rest of the afternoon.
As she walked down the hall, some of the boys came out of the training room. She high-fived them before coming up on Jamie, bringing up the rear.
He flicked the cup of tea, still in Y/n’s hand, and smirked. “Cheers.”
Y/n looked back and met his waiting gaze, the two of them sharing a smile. The days at Nelson Road grew more unpredictable the further into the season they got, but some things were as constant as breathing.
——————
The day of the Brighton match started as normal as any other. Y/n made the familiar trek to the owner’s box, taking a seat between Keeley and Higgins, and braced for the ninety minutes of nerves she both hated and loved.
“Oh, it’s Jack,” Keeley announced as she scrolled her phone. The three of them sat to attention as they waited to hear the text, “She’s saying that she’s in Argentina…for the next couple of months.”
“Ouch,” Higgins commented. Y/n scoffed while Rebecca pulled Keeley into her side.
“Well,” Keeley took a breath, “I think our break is actually an ‘up.’ So now that Jack is officially my ex,” she looked between the group, “Please feel free to say any of the things that you didn’t like about her.”
Rebecca sighed, “Well-“
“Ooh,” Higgins chimed in, “Her handshake was way too firm. You know-“ he groaned and grunted as he imitated the action, “I get it. You’re friendly. Good riddance.”
Y/n bit down on her bottom lip, trying to keep the comments from flying out her mouth.
“Something you’d like to say, Y/n?” Keeley asked knowingly.
Shaking her head, she tried to go the diplomatic route. “Just want to watch some football.”
Keeley slowly nodded, staring out at the field with her.
“And she’s a fucking asshole,” Y/n muttered as low as she could to let only Keeley hear it. They smiled to one another.
Right off the bat, the Greyhounds were struggling. Isaac, usually so focused, was off his game. He cost them a goal kick and earned Brighton a corner instead. It wasn’t like him and the fans were letting their displeasure be known.
Even worse, when Colin lost an easy goal, Isaac went after him. The two of them argued until Jamie and Sam, playing peacemaker, held Isaac back from following Colin any further.
Y/n frowned, something had to have happened before the match. The boys were far more in sync than this, and they sure as hell didn’t fight each other.
The first half ended on the heels of Dani just nearly making a goal, only for Brighton to block it. The score was 1-nil as the Greyhounds trudged back to the locker room.
Higgins, Y/n, Rebecca and Keeley went silent as the fifteen minute break began. There wasn’t anything to say.
Y/n’s eyes were glazing over the crowd on the opposite side of the stadium when a commotion started. She followed the noise to the tunnel to see Isaac, leaping into the stands and grabbing one of the fans.
“Oh my gosh,” she mumbled. Keeley, Rebecca and her all rose to their feet.
With the distance, the scene could hardly be seen properly, but it appeared that Isaac was holding the fan by the shirt and yelling in his face. The ref had never pulled the red card out so fast. It was unprecedented and unacceptable.
Higgins rushed out his seat, the women moving to make room for him down the aisle. Y/n’s eyes followed Roy as he helped Isaac down and started shouting something to the security guards.
The scene died down as quickly as it began. The fan was escorted out of the stadium and the Greyhounds disappeared into the tunnel.
“What the hell was that?” Rebecca finally asked.
“I don’t know,” Keeley breathed.
Internally, Y/n began to feel some sort of panic build. She couldn’t decipher the complexities of it, all she knew was she had to move.
“Where are you going?” Rebecca asked as Y/n slid past them.
“I don’t know,” she mumbled Keeley’s same answer, already climbing the stairs.
She hurried through the suite, past all the fans opening social media to post that they’d witnessed the fight themselves. Past all the fans in the concourse exclaiming how McAdoo was about to fucking kill the twat. Y/n couldn’t hear any of it as she made for the personnel-only entrance into the building.
When she made it to the empty hall outside the locker room, she faltered. Her immediate reaction would be to run in, but she knew it was far from appropriate. Her hand instinctively reached toward the door, even with feet of space between her and it. She couldn’t.
Nearly as soon as she’d thought it, Isaac came bursting through the door, unaware of her presence as he stalked to the boot room. He slammed that door shut and Y/n flinch at the sound.
Ten seconds later, Roy came out much more peacefully, but still with purpose.
Y/n stepped forward, her movements and her voice hesitant, “Hey-“
Roy could see the concern etched deeply in her face and touched her arm as he passed. “I got it.”
It wasn’t often that Roy wasn’t scowling, wasn’t speaking like he smoked a pack of cigarettes a day. For him to speak softly, to voluntarily comfort someone, he had to have meant it.
Y/n stood frozen as he shut the door to the boot room, all the pieces of her reaction making sense suddenly. After Isaac had attacked the fan, her first thought hadn’t been about PR. It hadn’t been about the clean-up her and Keeley would have to do, the stress of it all. It hadn’t had anything to do with what the internet would think or the fans or anyone.
Her first thought was to wonder if Isaac was okay.
She knew by now she cared about AFC Richmond. She had a special affection for Rebecca and their weekly tea. Keeley had cracked her way past Y/n’s gates simply by being herself. Ted was the nicest slice of home she could have gotten.
This was different. This was caring so deeply for the team that she was standing in the hall, unmoving until she knew they were all alright.
It was no longer about letting them in, Y/n knew, it was about how deeply etched in her heart they were.
She waited, waited, the whole fifteen minutes, hearing only the muffled mumbles of the team’s conversation through the doors. When they cheered and exited the room, their spirits seemingly lifted, none of them even noticed her against the wall.
Y/n moved to stand outside the boot room, catching Colin and Trent as the last ones to exit the locker room. Trent threw her a small salute that she matched, before heading out to his own seat. She still wasn’t leaving until she knew all was well.
Eventually, Roy came out of the boot room with Isaac in tow. The disgraced captain glanced up at her as he passed, Y/n made a point to squeeze his arm. He didn’t flinch at her touch, but didn’t make a point of lingering as he headed to the locker room to wait the game out.
As Y/n inhaled, Roy nodded, “He’s alright.”
“Okay,” she whispered.
The two of them walked back to their separate paths, Roy heading out to the pitch and Y/n heading back to the owner’s box.
The match turned around after that, tremendously so. The Greyhounds had hit the pitch united once more, particularly Colin, who’d assisted in both goals that had led them to victory. Balance seemed to have been restored, and while Isaac would still be the most memorable part of the game, Colin’s efforts wouldn’t be forgotten.
And, as always, Y/n’s work began the moment the ref called it.
There were strict instructions from both Keeley and her to Higgins not to grab any of the players. They’d no doubt be asked about their captain’s actions and none of them needed to deal with that stress. Ted was the only one who could comfortably handle it.
They waited with Rebecca in the back of the room, Higgins and Trent joined them at the last minute.
“He’s on his way,” Higgins said.
“Thank you, Leslie,” Rebecca replied before turning to Keeley and Y/n, “You gave Ted some talking points?”
Keeley frowned, “No. I haven’t done that in a long time.”
“Not for a while,” Y/n added.
The side door opened before Rebecca could truly begin to worry. Where Ted should have strolled in, Roy did instead.
“Fuck,” Y/n whispered, punctuated by a gag from Higgins.
Roy took a seat at the desk, staring down the entire room. No one was wearing their surprise well.
“Yeah, alright, you got me today,” he growled, “Any questions?”
Every reporter’s hand went up, all of them shouting to get Roy’s attention.
“Fucking hell,” he mumbled before pointing to one of them, “You. Five-o’-clock shadow head.”
Gary, self-proclaimed Jimmy Page fan, stood up. “Coach Kent, do you or the organization condone what Isaac McAdoo did today?”
“What a stupid fucking question,” Roy was quick to reply, Rebecca, Higgins and Y/n all screwing their eyes shut. “‘Course we don’t. What Isaac did was awful. He was lucky he only got a red card.”
“Okay,” Gary relented, “So why’d he do it?”
Roy chuckled, looking like he was nearly about to say something before stopping himself. Instead of cursing or snarking, he settled back in his chair.
“When I was first coming up through Sunderland, there was an old-timer on the team,” Roy began, “Local guy. He and his wife were about to have their first kid. So during training one day, I made a joke that statistically, I was probably the real dad. And the boys fell about laughing, but he went fucking nuts. He battered me. Properly. I had a black eye, chipped tooth, three broken ribs…I couldn’t play for six games. He got booted off the team. After that,” Roy shook his head, “No club would go near him.”
“Then in the summer, after I could breathe again,” he went on, “I bumped into him in a pub. And I got the chance to say sorry for my stupid fucking joke. And he got to tell me he and his wife had lost the baby a month before all that went down. He hadn’t told anyone. Kept it all inside.”
The room had fallen hush, save for the occasional click of a camera.
“Look, I get that some people think if they buy a ticket,” Roy’s voice regained its strength, “They’ve got the right to yell whatever abusive shit they want at footballers. But they’re not just footballers. They’re also people. And none of us,” he dragged his finger across the room, “Know what is going on in each other’s lives.”
“So for Isaac to do what he did today, even though it was wrong,” Roy pointed to his chest, “I give him love. And as for why he did what he did,” he leaned closer to the microphones, “That’s none of my fucking business.”
That was it. There was nothing left to say. Roy had handled it with more grace and patience than anyone could have expected.
Y/n smiled to herself, “Okay.”
“Next question,” he called to the room, which erupted back into shouts and flashes, “Yeah, new Trent.”
“Coach,” Marcus spoke up, “Let’s talk about Colin Hughes.”
“Yeah, he’s a hell of a player,” Roy answered, “And a great man. I think we’ve underused him.”
“I think you’re right,” Marcus said.
“Glad we agree,” Roy replied, “I prefer you to old Trent.”
The room laughed before Roy called on the next reporter. Rebecca and him shared a look of acknowledgement, this was making up for his ditching of the last presser.
Roy went on answering questions a few minutes longer before abruptly calling it. As everyone was saying their goodbyes for the evening, Y/n caught him in the hall.
“You did good,” she complimented.
Roy grunted a little, still bad at taking praise about anything other than his professional abilities. “Sorry if I…made your job harder the other day.”
She shrugged, “No more so than anyone else. You’re just more of a dick about it.”
Having said it with a smile Roy knew Y/n wasn’t serious…totally. His lips quirked up ever so slightly.
“Night, Roy,” Y/n said, hitting his arm as she walked past him.
“Cheers,” he replied, heading his own way.
—————————
While the day was a victory, Jamie was exhausted. Some of the boys had gone out to celebrate, he was one of the ones who decided heading home was more appealing.
A ring of the doorbell dragged him off his couch and into the entryway. He opened the door, his chest both filling and draining at the sight.
Y/n was leant against the frame, a soft smile on her lips. She held up a paper takeaway bag.
“I won’t tell Roy if you don’t,” she promised.
Jamie chuckled under his breath and moved to let her in.
It wasn’t just the match that’d worn Jamie out. Colin’s confession in the locker room was…heavy. Weighing most on Colin, of course, but when the celebratory noise had died down and Jamie was left to his own thoughts, he found they were louder than normal.
Y/n showing up only acted as an amplifier.
Here was Colin, hiding away one of the biggest parts of himself. Forced to keep the person he loved in the shadows for fear of the public’s reaction. He couldn’t hold them, couldn’t be seen with them, couldn’t claim them. The person who meant everything to him.
And here was Jamie, with the woman he cared about most standing before him, feeling the weight of his privilege.
“Samir was working tonight,” Y/n announced as she slipped off her shoes, “He kept asking me if I was buying for us both. I think he slipped in some extra-“
She was cut off by Jamie, wrapping his arms around her in a full embrace.
Jamie wasn’t good with words. He was barely good with feelings. And expressing them was a whole other matter. What he did know to be true was that Y/n was the singular most important person in his life. Whether he’d realized it before or not, he wasn’t sure. But it was suddenly crushing him, he was overwhelmed by his affection for her. She was the best part of his worst times, the highlight of his days. The literal sunshine lighting up the darkest parts of him, the parts everyone else looked at and ran from. But not her, never her.
Y/n stumbled a bit, Jamie steadying her as he tugged her to his body. It wasn’t like they never hugged, but this felt different. The whole day had been so emotionally charged, she wasn’t surprised that he was feeling some of it. She wasn’t sure what had happened in the locker room between halves or after the game, but whatever it was had done something to him, and she apparently was the solution.
The truth was, Jamie was the first person Y/n hadn’t tired of being there for. She wanted to save him at every possible opportunity. To be there for him in whatever way he needed her. Lord knows he had done it enough for her. He’d looked at her ugliest parts and matched them, the two of them somehow growing together through their horrible histories. Some relationships were easily replaced, but there could never be another Jamie.
Y/n slid her arms around Jamie’s back, stealing some of the comfort for herself.
Jamie rested his chin on her shoulder, shutting his eyes and letting the moment wash over him. The world could stop, just for a moment, and it would be there when they broke apart. But for now, Y/n was all he wanted to feel.
They stayed in the hall, clinging to one another, having only unwrapped the first layer of what all they felt meant.
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