#I have the mentality of an 8yr old I know but I just think that stuff is pretty cool | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

josnhoes · 1 year

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What about Duke, Jason and Barbra around knak mc?

Duke takes his job as the family braincell seriously. Look he knows technically speaking Tim is the smartest. But he was the one in the family with common sense...aside Alfred obviously... so obviously *he* had the brain cell.

Well that's how he sees it.

His time with reader is spent with him take the role of fun but safe big brother. He takes you to age appropriate activities and enjoys them as much as you. (He snuck you to the zoo once. Sneaking because otherwise Damien would want to come and he wanted one on one time!)

As responsible as he sounds on paper he is still young so he doesn't plan for things like snacks or things to keep you occupied during car drives. He's not used to being around 6-8yr Olds. He isn't bad he just doesn't have the full bordering dad/mom/parent brain going.

Jason is the cool brother who borders uncle that parents *don't* want you to be around. Which just makes you want to be around him more. Well that's the energy he has. Actually he's fairly responsible. Makes sure you eat, keeps you safe, other then that he let's you do what you want. With him watching over you though.

Absolutely teaches you to fire a gun and how to steal from people. Just don't tell Bruce. Might even get you a custom small gun in your aesthetic.

Not just scary dog privileges, you get Feral scary dog privileges. He never *ever* wants you to suffer like he has. If the Joker even sniffs around you he will absolutely kill him. Sure he's trying to make good with Bruce again, be better. But your safety is more important.

And obviously as yanderes the batclan would see his point, and while they scold him lightly they'd actually get over it.

Barbra always enjoys when more girls are added to the family and you're just so cute! Likes to teach you about her role as oracle low key hoping you'll pick up the mantle someday. It'd be much safer then you going onto the field. *If* anyone would even let you.

You're kind of her little flying monkey. You help her find blackmail...I mean cute family memories to save.

Very happy to help nurture your hobbies and help with any class work. Though she will admit you rarely need her help with your normal class work. Such a smart baby sister!

Is the most concerned for your mental state. Because she looked you up and there was no adult with your name where you claimed to be from. So obviously you were never an adult. It leads her to wonder where you got that idea. Is it some sort of mental block you use to protect yourself? Something you were taught so your parents could just have you taking care of yourself? Why did they think you needed to understand taxes? Regardless it's signs you had a neglectful family so she and the family will just have to step up so you can be a kid again!

#DC knak au #yandere #platonic yandere #batfam #batman

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bellarad · 3 years

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I'm having such a rough one. My birthday is coming up in 2 months and im going to be 24... it feels so old to me.

I've always hated my birthday because it always sucked when I was younger and then I just got into the habit of expecting it to suck which... made it suck because of that. It doesn't matter how many fb friends comment on my wall, I rarely get sincere messages let alone gifts from friends on my bday. Every year I get gifts for friends' birthdays and every year they neglect to do the same. Marcy is the only exception.

Just a card would be sufficient... at least make me feel thought of...

Idk, I've just always hated it but I want to love it I want it to be exciting! But if I try to raise my expectations to make it exciting, it invariably fails and I become miserable. I never know what to do for my birthday because I have only one friend in Ottawa now and the others are spread everywhere.

I desperately want to go dancing at a club and get wasted and end the night at McDonald's or smth but that's not really a possibility rn and I doubt it'll change by January.

It doesn't help that I have zero identity and zero affiliation to anything. As a teen it was so easy to like things! To identify with things! I was queer, a feminist, a writer, a poet, a Harry Potter nerd. But now I don't feel any strong feelings toward anything.

I'm overcome with apathy. I lack an identity beyond my ego. I feel so empty all the time and even when I find something I like doing, it doesn't last long. I rarely finish projects and if I do it takes forever.

Even now I'm spending thousands of dollars to be a practical nurse and im not even sure i want to be one. My end goal is midwifery but im not even sure about that either! Even though I've spent a good 8yrs thinking thats what I want to do!

Im never fulfilled by anything. I keep reading all these books and articles and watching videos about how to be better, take care of mental illness, get organized. But no matter how many different things I try nothing sticks! I don't fit in anywhere.

I remember being 15, I wrote a poem where I called myself a Nowhere Boy. I don't fit in a space, I am the space and it makes me so fucking hard to nail down. Look at me! Im pansexual, im non-binary; it feels like I just can't be one thing! I can't align with any one thing because I'm constantly changing my fucking mind.

I'm so tired of this cycle of bullshit, I just want to be someone! I'm so tired. I don't want to grow old anymore.

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medicallyme-est1977-2 · 2 years

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~ PJE#75 ~ 12.01.2021 ~ Needles|Graston ~

Needles is a simple word for Acupuncture. These go deeper than Acupuncture. Spinal cord stimulator MUST be off to do this. I can’t imagine the pain that would cause. 😆 Never know might work better although I highly doubt it. So I do this every 4-6 weeks. The needles are out in at certain junctions along the spine; tapping the nerve at each one. Some make me jump, some I’ll shed a tear, and a few I don’t feel. Honestly those are my favorite. It’s usually just Troy in the room. Sometimes they’ll ask if students can watch. Idfc but what I say stays in that room. Troy knows. I’m sure he’s gave them a warning about me. I’m crass. Blunt. Don’t give a fuck really. I’ll usually offer an apology before they start doing Needles. I’ve been his longest patient. 10 years and going strong. That’s fucking sad. Makes me angry inside. Angry tears. Those are always good. ~~~~ Graston is a beast. It’s painful as fuck. It’s killer for knots in muscle tissue that’s rock hard. The treatment to maintain my ability to walk is fucking painful each week. It sucks. My mood ~ well I try to be happy sarcastic Toby but some days I just can’t. I just wanna get stoned. Kill every mother fucking nerve in me and be numb. Fucking N.U.M.B. Usually when I go to TheraPlay I’m 2-3 puffs into a good bowl. I tell them to go hard. Fucking work that shit out so I can walk. So I don’t have to use a fucking Walker. I keep it in the truck just in case. I keep 2 canes in it now too. The price to walk shouldn’t be so fucking hard. The price to be pain free is impossible and nothing but a fucking dream. 1st big surgery in a couple of years on Dec. 15. Kayla has to take off of work to help me. Hopefully not for very long. Just enough to get issued to doing things 1 armed. To most people this isn’t a big deal. It’s not. For me though it’s one of those surgeries I’ve been preparing for all my life. As a kid I can remember laying up at Riley during the day time watching the docs & nurses running around; working. At 8yrs old I had a double testicular hernia repaired. I had to stay at Riley for 3-4 days I think. I remember going to school as the kid who had to sit on the fucking pillow. I got sick of explaining that one. One of the fun ones was I had a sinus surgery at like 12yrs old. I told everyone I was in a fight. I wish I had pictures of that. They broke my nose in two places to straighten it so I could breath better. ~~~~ Spinal Fusion at 32years old was really rough. It was so hard. Single and had to stay in a rehab unit at a Nursing Facility. That was the most humbling experience I’ve ever had. It grounded me. It let me know that life isn’t a party. That broken vertebrae were a serious issue and I needed to act accordingly. .. somewhat. 😆 You’re only weak if you’re mentally weak. That’s so true. I’ve spent the past couple of years going from one doc to the next. Making them fuckers richer while I’m a broken fucked up mess. So days I fake the pain. The feelings. The emotions of what I’m really feeling. That’s not good. I can’t do that. That’ll lead down the wrong trails. The dark days have to stay … dark. God built a fighter. I’ve been fighting every fucking day. Some days more than others. Maybe a week ago I had several good days in a row. That was a first in maybe a few YEARS. So I know the good days can be had. 2 weeks of good days hopefully until the next surgical journey begins. ~ ALL WORK MINE ~ TobyA ~

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kevinriley90 · 3 years

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selfpityandporn · 6 years

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Rant- Okay, #1, fuck you. You started a fight and now like everything you’ve been a cunt about is fucking coming back and pissing me off. But lets just keep to I dunno, this week.

I literally had to fight both of you, "adults" just to take OUR cat to the vet, cause your fucking cheap and in goddamn denial, thats right GODDAMN, I can say that, because fuck you I can. I don't care if it uses gods name in vain, since when did you give a shit about god any way, considering the absolute shit storm you've given me for the last 4 years about going to church you didn't know anything about.

I fight just to get this cat to vet, long story short she's deathly sick. And I'm not complaining about taking care of her, I'm happy too, I will wipe her ass everyday long as she gets to be here, cause I love her and she's family. But the fact that I literally have to fight you just to get her fucking .70 food is GODDAMN ridiculous, god forbid her flea or ear mite medicine to keep her from scratching the blood out of herself. But I'm dollering you to death, and I'm a selfish peice of shit, excuse the fucking shit outta me.

Also, thanks for literally not helping me with her at FUCKING ALL. Like I said, I'm just happy she's alive, but honestly you wanna talk about how much you love her, and care about her, but you wont help me get the right food, and can't even take care of her. Our kitty was so sick she couldn't even move, so she had to be carried. I didn't want to take her to my room, because theres fucking shit and insulation everywhere from our shower breaking and dad still not cleaning up or fixing it, and I can't clean it up without getting bitched out. But god forbid we put her in your room, really? It's clean, your rooms not as hot, and you have a place to put her, but your terrified she's gonna pee or something, really? Your lucky she's fucking alive, I got pissed on taking her to the vet. Why, BECAUSE SHES SICK AND CANT HELP IT. I didn't get mad, I cleaned it up LIKE A FUCKING ADULT. You won't help me carry her when I'm trying to get her food, you don't want her in the living room. I could go on and on, you get the idea, I'm happy my cats alive, but fuck you for not helping me help her. SHE NEEDS US, your dropping the goddamn ball.

Lets get to today, the snapper of this, cause honestly this HAS SO MUCH SHIT, from you calling me a whore, accusing me of shit, not teaching me how to drive, cussing me out, not coming to my school stuff, thats might be a fucking tenth of all the shit that has been frustrating me. BECAUSE YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE AN ADULT, AND A PARENT, YOUR SUPPOSED TO HELP ME BUT INSTEAD YOU HAVE YOUR HEAD STUCK UP YOUR ASS.

We had our little family trip today, it was going so well. Till we were almost home, everyones in the car. Like usual you and dad are smoking like fucking trains and I can't fucking breathe, god forbid I roll down my window to satisfy MY HUMAN FUCKING NEED FOR OXYGEN. That wasn't the biggest issue, no the biggest issue is when you decided to fun your fucking mouth cussing me. Make such a huge fucking deal out of literally nothing. And when I say big deal, I mean on and on and on for 30 goddamn minutes. And any time it got quiet, YOU KEPT FUCKING YAPPING. I literally put my ear buds in, and ignored you. I didn't keep arguing, till you were LITERALLY SCREAMING SO LOUD I COULD HEAR YOU OVER MY ROARING TRAP MUSIC. Then I retaliate, you tell me to just shut the fuck up, the conversations over. FUCK YOU, I STOPPED TALKING 30 GODDAMN MINUTES AGO, YOUR THE DUMB FUCK THAT KEEPS GODDAMN TALKING.

And then, you pissed me off. Lets jump to last week. I got my first credit card, why? Because my laptop broke, I needed another for my online classes, we as a family were too broke to buy it. I understand that, I took it into my own hands. Then, you tried to start a fight, cause I didn't wanna go an extra 200+ into debt getting my little brother, WHO IS LITERALLY 8 a fucking laptop. You started a fight, because I refused to buy and 8 year old, a laptop, on my credit. Which oh by the way I know you would have never payed me back for, because your you and I've learned this lesson literally a dozen times, but your my mom so I keep letting you borrow my christmas money (I might get like, $60 each year, which is all I get from my family members, she "borrows" Then, will get her taxes, blow them and not pay me back, and guilt trip me about literally buying me stuff for my birthday at tax time, anyways) You tried to start a fight over that, then literally tried to put words in my mouth, saying I said I'd get him one. No, I didn't. I said I wish I could, I want him to learn how to type, but my line of credit is only $500, my laptop it's self was $250, the rest I was trying to save for emergencies, cause I knew we were fucking broke.

Now, I'm not on a rabbit trail, this ties in I promise. The day I got my laptop, we had went in Walmart to look, you said you were gonna get a handful of groceries while I looked, alright. I didn't get a laptop there, we go to leave. You ask me to pay for the groceries. I told you I didn't want to on credit, but how much is it? "Oh only like $20, I only got a few." Checked out, it was like $40. I got it anyways, and just asked that when you had the money, (She's literally getting a 1000+ check for her 401k in like, a week) if you could give me some for the upcoming comic con. (Comic con is a big deal for me, I cosplay, I go with my best friend and her family, I literally look forward to it all year. Most of the time I go, I'm usually broke, except for the last few cause I had a job until about a month before all this, whole other rant, anyways) So I was like cool, it sucks I'm another 40$ in the hole, but she knows how much con means to me, she'll give me it back. Then, I get my laptop. Back to the 8yr old brother thing, he literally has broken like 5+ tablets, my tv, and 3 phones alright. He gets mad, will throw them, scream curse words at them. It's ridiculous, literally didn't want to throw away $200+ I DIDNT HAVE on a brat who was gonna destroy it, along with my parents not knowing how to use it, neither does he so they expect me to fix LITERALLY everything, which is so annoying, cause then, he breaks it, its somehow on me. Anyways.

I was nice enough to lay away the laptop for you, another $30 I didn't have, but it got you off my fucking back. You also said you'd give me that back for con. I just wanna put in here, that when I got my job and actually had hours, I took my family out to dinner every paycheck, bought them stuff. Genuinely tried to not be selfish, Literally I think the only big thing I bought myself was my cosplay that I had wanted for like, years. But then my hours got cut, I was working literally 5 hours a week. I might have made $30-$40 for the majority of my employment, an with that I iterally saved up to take my friend out for her birthday and buy myself bedsheets, and still tried to take us out to eat, cause we got to do it as a family. But during this she was literally acting like, I had to pay for anything and everything. I needed to go to town for school, "You got gas money?" I asked for a few dollers so I could eat at work/before works, "Can't you buy it yourself?" Like, I would have HAPPILY if I had it, but I didn't, and your literally my mom, can you not drive me to school? Help me buy lunch, like WTfff?

And, today. Oh today, after you cussed and cussed and fucking cussed, I put my earbuds in and leave it alone, I DIDN"T SAY ANYTHING BACK, even though I know your still talking trash. I pause my musics just so I can hear you.

"Just wait till the next time you need something from me! Just fucking wait, and you can forget about your goddamn comic con money, go get a fucking job!."....................................................

I'm sorry, excuse me? Did I just fucking hear that correctly? See, I'm not a bad person, I don't believe so. But I fucking mentally snapped. I literally spent hours the other week helping her find another job, putting in her application. I can't get a job, because in the past fucking year and half she hasn't taken, and no exageration, more than 20 minutes to try to teach me how to drive, and not not only are you refusing to give me to the money you deadass owe me. But I. I need to get. A . God. Damn. Job.???????

At first, I handled it like a child, a child who loves their mother. "I don't care, I'll have fun without a fucking dime to my name." Then, my ass adulted, silently, excuse me. Excuse me, I don't think I heard that correctly, you not only are tryna sit there and cuss me, TELL ME TO GET A JOB, and, oh and, try to refuse the money you took from me?

I really, ya know, I really don't think thats gonna work. Cause see here, asshat, I have all your credit card info, all your social shit cause you don't know how to do a fucking job application, and, oh and, a cold GODDAMN shoulder. So heres how this is gonna work darlin, the day of con will come, and you will either give me my money (I didn't even ask for the full $70 btw, I said maybe like $40.) But you will either now give me all $70, or I will slip your card from your wallet, while your in your smokin drunken stooper, and frankly, cruelly, hold it fucking hostage till you #1Give me my fucking money, and #2 Fucking apologize, and admit you tried to do me so goddamn shitty. And if I don't think that apology is good enough, I'll take my money on my own and you will have disappointed me. I gave so many chances for redemption, and I still am.

But honestly this is prolly my fucking snapping point cause you have insulted me and frustrated me enough. I am 18, I am trying to adult, with no help from you, if anything more fight. Between finishing my senior year by my fucking self, to the stupid job shit, to omg, all the college shit she was supposed to help me with that I had to do on my own, to our poor cat which I'm trying to nurse off the fucking death bed single handedly, to literally not being able to get a job because of you, to you now more than likely ruining my credit, cussing me out, and just being an absolute pain in my goddamn ass along with every fucking thing else I am having to do on my own.

So, excuse me, fuck you. Get the fuck out of my way. You will NOT stand between me and the things I have earned and strive to get. In fact, no one will. You wanna be fucking petty, and fucking rude? Don't get made at me for winning a game you goddamn started :) K, thanks.

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meanwhileinoz · 6 years

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Dad’s Powerful Story About Suicide And Depression Is A Reminder That It Gets Better And You Need To See It Now

Nobody is a stranger to pain and feeling depressed.

But, for some it reaches a point of crippling one’s motivation to even live. Craig Stone is one of those people who wrote his way out of depression. He is a father and an author who battled the illness of depression.

His story is a powerful reminder that if you try it will eventually get better.

Craig Stone

Eight years ago, Stone considered taking his own life. And the story of him recovering from that repulsive phase of depression is heartbreaking.

See that bench. 8yrs ago I sat on it thinking about throwing myself off Blackfriars Bridge. Today, I took this pic of my son. Tomorrow might be the same. But it might also be brighter. It might even bring unimaginable brilliance. Hang in there. Love is always coming. #depression

— Craig Stone (@craigstone_) November 19, 2017

Since he shared it on Sunday, Stone’s story went viral with over 7000 re-tweets.

And clearly, he’s not alone in his struggle. In response, many people shared their own stories of conquering depression.

When I was pregnant I planned to end my life as soon as my baby was old enough to survive without me. I believed everyone who told me I wouldn’t cope, I’d be a rubbish mum. Now the love of my life is nearly eight and tells me I’m the best mum in the world, the perfect team.

— Queen of Shoe Tattoos (@ShoeTattoos) November 19, 2017

It served as a ray of hope for many battling with crippling depression.

I have been going through a severe depression myself. Your tweet helps me see out today’s day and probably tomorrow and then the day after. Thank you for sharing this and unknowingly inspiring me to fight another day. strength to you!

— Alok Badri (@alok_TTID) November 21, 2017

I’m in a pretty dark place at the moment but it’s just that hope that you never know what tomorrow can bring that keeps me going

— Emile Strunz (@EmileStrunz) November 20, 2017

Thank you for sharing your personal story in one profoundly inspirational tweet, Craig. You probably don’t even realise just how many people you have given hope to. Thank you. #MentalHealthMatters

— Erika Dallimore (@erikadallimore) November 20, 2017

It’s bringing a chorus of mental health awareness.

I don’t know you, never heard of you but your simple act of sharing your story has an incredible significance to many people who also don’t know you. Thank you for your courage and being here to tell us all your story. Stay safe.

— Michael Goos (@mentalenviro) November 19, 2017

I’m going to think about this every day until I can take a photo of my own

— nopevember (@suzanne_mayes) November 20, 2017

The overwhelming response compelled Stone to respond with an appreciation note for his followers.

Reading through the comments here is a joy. And to think, they said Twitter was full of trolls. All I’m seeing is lovely people being supportive and happy for happiness. Thank you for all the lovely responses! Big hugs everyone. x

— Craig Stone (@craigstone_) November 20, 2017

The story was such an inspiration to many that even twitter had nothing nasty to say about it.

If you’re reading this and are struggling with depression. Hang in there because you’re not alone and things will get better. All you have to do is hold on to the leash of faith.

http://ift.tt/2jYeS5D

#ENTERTAINMENT

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ninjakittycomics · 7 years

Text

Having woken from a dream where my mother, in deep sadness, wanted me to just let her go lie down now.

I now know why this political climate kills me so inside.

My lens.

I grew up with a man who had to have control of every little detail. Everything in it’s place no matter what, to hell with who got hurt in the middle.

If they got hurt, it’s because they shouldn’t have been there, and let God sort them.

A serious, unrelenting man child whose mind I have gathered, must sound like this,”If you don’t do what’s right, dad (god) is gonna whomp us both. I’m gonna stop you from doin bad, so I don’t get whomped.”

Married to that man was a freer woman. “Don’t be unkind to each other. Do what you have to, but mind each other, and make sure everyone comes out of it ok.”

A mama in the realest sense. Making sure that all the ducklings survive the pond, and grow and fly.

It is not surprising to me that she got terribly hurt and depressed from the union.

As I watch… What can easily be described as a political nightmare starting, as the way we have enjoyed life is starting to break down. What safeties we had are being stripped.

I am triggered daily.

I waited so long, to be old enough where that divorce and that world in particular that I grew up with, would go the hell away so that I could just live.

And here it is, again, but now, in an arena I cannot escape.

There is no cop to call, when the men “Mama America” is married to, are brutish, authoritarian, and don’t give a damn who gets hurt, so long as everything goes back to the way that their daddies said it should be.

And I’ve noticed, they’ve been fighting the same fight all their life too… These men are my dad. They heard all their life how things should be, and are aghast that they were lied to.

In noticing that things aren’t what they should, instead of taking a healthy mental attitude, and saying, well, ok… what is the essence, of what I want from those old stories? What can I make real, given the reality that is?

They say, shove it back into the box. (this is the equivalent of a sobbing 8yr old boy saying, “No, you two get married again, I’ll be a better kid, and we’ll be fine!” You know how that ends)

It is denial in its highest and it’s sickest when it comes from full adults. A mind that cannot grow. (or will not)

I write this, one, because I am upset that they do not examine themselves, their ramifications, nor their own motives clearly. They truly act like screaming children who were left in charge of the baby.

And sadly, their flailing and “i don't wanna” could very well kill their sibling. And like small screaming children, they won’t understand why. They might even only scream “it’s not my fault”.

Even though these men see themselves as the adult in charge. Their behavior is no better.

And two, I write because I am examining my own self. Why I go off the handles as hard as I do when a healthcare bill is forced through without an actual shred of forethought or precision.

I am all for reform, but do your actual damned homework on it.

Not waiting for the CBO score is like handing in your report card with all the F’s marked out in crayon and hoping that mommy won’t notice you’re lying.

Believe me, It doesn’t work. All the kids here can tell you, that kind of maneuver earns you a whomping too.

Nobody is untouchable, and we all live in each other’s neighborhoods. Good luck with that denial thing.

I digress though.

It is enough that I care about human life and human rights, that I would go off the handles when these things happen.

This writing, and thinking though, was to explain to myself, and maybe to others reading out there, why I have added “off the rails” issues.

In seeing that plainly, I feel like I can defuse half of the mental anguish I am in, which in turn, helps me be more clear headed for the political fights yet to come.

I hope this can provide you with some of the same clarity.

(help comes in many formats… let some in)

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