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cricketnationrise · 3 years

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Wouldn’t it be Andoverly?

for day 6 of nurseyweek2021: friendship. also on AO3

_X_

Derek was pretty good at making friends. Usually. But he’d never been the new kid before. Elementary and middle school had been a breeze, his siblings paving the way for him with teachers, and Nursey’s willingness to share crayons worked in elementary school and hockey skills did the trick all through middle school.

Now though, he was all on his own.

His sisters had graduated years ago and Dan had skipped a grade, so he was gone. Derek had been counting on Dan being here more than he was willing to admit to his moms.

If he could just get through this first day of classes, he would be fine. He just had to make it to hockey practice. Derek could handle himself. He could. With a deep breath he left his dorm, ready to face the day.

WHAM

Or he could just lay here forever.

“Sorry ‘bout that, you okay dude?”

Derek looks up from where he is sprawled on the floor to see a guy with a full mustache leaning over him, concern all over his face.

“Yeah, I think so,” Derek says, managing to sit up, rubbing his head.

“Oh shit, here, let me help you up man.”

Derek takes Mustache Guy’s hand, and is yanked up so powerfully that he almost goes down again.

“Thanks, I’m good now.”

“I really didn’t mean to plow into you like that. I’m glad I didn’t manage to damage your beauteous face. That would have been a real shame.”

“Thanks, I think. Um,” Derek didn’t know if Mustache Guy was hitting on him or just exuberant, so he went on as if the last part hadn’t been said, “Do you know where the Washington Building is?”

“Chyeah! I’m going there myself; we can walk together!”

“Awesome, thanks.”

“So you’re a freshman? Or a transfer? I don’t think I’ve seen you here before,” Mustache Guy says.

“Yeah,” Derek says, “A freshman.”

“That’s cool, man. You doing any sports? You’ve got serious muscle under that uniform.”

“Um, I play hockey. I got recruited actually.”

“HOLY SHIT DUDE! I’m on the team, too! Welcome, man! Defense, right? Call me Shitty – that’s my team nickname.”

Shitty is off like a shot, jabbering away about the team and how exciting it is that Derek’s there now, already talking about the schedule and fuck those Shattuck guys seriously, bro.

Derek interrupts the flood of information, “Your nickname is Shitty?” Derek asks, “How awful are the guys on the team if that’s your nickname?” he asks, aghast. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

“Nah, its chill bro, I go by Shitty actually. My family are a giant bag of racist bigoted assholes and if they weren’t paying for me to go here and for college, I wouldn’t go home at all. But the name they gave me is truly awful. My initials are BS. Get it? It’s a giant fuck you to the jerks who tried to make me as conservative as them. Jokes on them, even the teachers call me Shitty, or Mr. Knight if they’re feeling formal. That might be a defense mechanism on their parts though, since I refuse to acknowledge my actual name.”

Derek is feeling cautiously optimistic about this guy after all that. No one who was that aware about his own family would be an asshole to him on purpose. He has a good feeling about this guy.

“Well then, hi Shitty, I’m Derek. Derek Nurse.”

“Oh hey, you must be Dan’s little brother! Good dude,” Derek smiled – at least people had liked Dan, that would help. “It’ll be weird not having him here for graduation. Nice to meet you. I’m gonna call you Nursey unless you have any objections,” Shitty says.

“Nope, I’m good,” Derek grins, “much better than my last nickname.”

“Let me guess, ‘Big D’,” says Shitty.

“Yup. Not a great amount of creativity in my middle school,” Derek says.

“Well, come on Nursey, don’t want you to be late on the first day! I’ll tell you all about the team on the way.”

Derek smiles to himself as he listens to Shitty talk as they walk towards a cluster of old brick buildings. Even if he doesn’t get close to the other guys on the team right away, it seems like Shitty’s already adopted him.

_X_

He was already regretting answering his phone.

“Nursey. Nursey Nursey Nursey Nursey Nur –”

“Oh my god what do you want, Shitty?!”

“Come play shinny with me and some of the guys! One of the townies’ dad built a rink in the backyard!”

“Alright! I’m in – give me five minutes to finish up this writing assignment.”

“Righteous! See you outside your door!”

_X_

Me: Can you come over?

Shitty: Of course dude

Want me to bring anything?

Something wrong?

Me: anxiety attack

red gatorade

Shitty: oh shit

omw

try to regulate your breathing till I get there

grab Tigger too

_X_

“What am I gonna do when you graduate, Shits?”

“What do you mean, bro? You’re gonna light it up, that’s what you’re gonna do!”

“Shitty…”

“I’m serious, man. You are mad talented on the ice, so you’ll probably be bumped up to second or even first line. Your poem was selected as a freshman for the school’s literary magazine. People are always asking me to bring you places – they want to hang out with you!”

“But you won’t be here. What if they don’t like me as much when you’re not around?”

“Impossible my dude. You’re great all by yourself and you’ll settle in in no time. Anyone who doesn’t like you when I’m not there aren’t smart by default. You’re a popular guy, you’ll have good friends after I graduate, I promise. And I’m always a phone call or text away.”

“Thanks, Shits.”

“Got your back, man. Now. Help me figure out where I’m going to college. Harvard, Yale, Samwell, Princeton, Brown. I need your pro/con skills. So far all I have is not New Jersey.”

“When you’re right you’re right. I’ll grab my fancy pens.”

_X_

“Nursey! Representing Andover on that Taddy Tour! What up, bro?”

Nursey whipped his head around at the shout of his name. There he was – Shitty hadn’t changed one bit. Well. His hair was longer since he didn’t have uniform requirements to meet.

“Heeey! Shitty! Knew I’d run into you eventually. Man, Samwell’s pretty sick.”

He was already planning on enrolling, but having Shitty here sealed the deal. Shitty had done so much to help Nursey feel comfortable at Andover three years ago. Nursey had missed him like crazy when he graduated, but they’d stayed in touch over the next few years. Shitty was always down to chat, but Nursey was really looking forward to hanging out with Shitty again in person.

The last three years at Andover hadn’t been bad – but there was always a presence that was palpably missing, at least to Nursey. Now that he was here, chilling with Shitty again, a weight came off his shoulders. Shitty’s got his back. Always.

#nurseyweek2021 #day 6: frienships #shitty knight #bs knight #shitty #nursey #Derek nurse #dan nurse mention because I love Nursey having a brother #friendship is the best ship #andover #samwell

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bittervitter · 4 years

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ang0mang0′s “copycat” claims

I didn’t want to have to make another post about this, but since people on sonicfan799 / thatAnge / @ang0mang0′s Tumblr profile are getting riled up about this ridiculous drama that should have died ages ago, I figured I’d defend myself. Some people who are trying to support me have been saying incorrect things too, so I also wanted to clear that up. This crap has been going on for months, everyone is sick of it by now. Instead of being brief like I did for other social medias, I’ll be as detailed as possible this time.

[1] “she’s copying/imitating/heavily referencing from my art style!!!”

Like people have said a million times, no I’m not. And nor is anyone else. Just because someone draws the Sonic characters in a similar style to you does not automatically mean they took, copied or “stole” those ideas from you. You don’t own the concept of buff, fluffy bodies or chubby muzzles. COINCIDENCE, as much as you hopelessly deny it, is very much a possible thing- even in crazy situations such as this. There are several other artists who have similar art styles by mere coincidence. IT IS NOT IMPOSSIBLE. As examples, these Instagram artists have similar styles: @ azulytoons and @ indigonite0 / @ magenta_mel and @ zer0finix / @ himemikal and @ natirix. NONE of these artists are “stealing” or referencing from each other- they just have similar art styles, and that is perfectly okay! They draw completely different things with completely different mindsets. The world does not revolve around you, ang0. Not everyone knows who you are, so some people who use the same traits that we do don’t even know we exist.

Also, to anyone unaware, an art STYLE is not merely how one chooses to portray a character. An art STYLE is also what brushes you use, how you sketch, how you line, how you colour, how you shade, how you choose to portray certain objects or ideas- basically your entire fucking understanding of how something’s supposed to look and how you LIKE it to look. It’s not just “chubby faces, poofy curly hair, buff bodies”. It’s everything in a piece AND that.

[2] “she’s tracing my art/ redrawing my ideas!”

Literally no. People have constantly asked you to provide evidence and you refused to. All you did was scream “but it’s so obvious, just look at it!” or “are you dumb? use your eyes!” and several other insults. If you want to prove a point or make someone see something, GIVE. EVIDENCE. The only person who actually provided “proof” was pin_kpeach, your ever so loyal whiteknight, but her “proof” only backfired and proved that the both of you are extremely delusional. In the drawings of ours that she layered over each other, next to NONE of the lines lined up. It looked like a clustered mess of scrap, and the reason for that is because IT WASN’T TRACED. In the one or two drawings where ONE. SINGLE. PIECE. actually lined up was entirely zoomed in to make it seem as though the whole thing was traced. No, honey, that’s not how you provide proof. That’s how you pull a muscle by reaching so desperately to lie about me. The rest of the drawings in those pictures didn’t line up at all, and one- or I believe both- needed to be titled to line them up in the first place. You could say that some people trace things and resize or rotate them, but if I were as dumb as you persist to say, then I wouldn’t have done something like that. Either way, one aspect of a drawing lining up is a common thing for people who have similar styles because- well, I just said it. THEY HAVE SIMILAR STYLES. If they draw something the same way, well fucking duh, it’ll match someone else’s drawing almost exactly sometimes.

[3] “she’s too petty and too much of a liar to credit me! saying the art isn’t hers will hurt her oversized ego!”

Ahaha no. The only one here with an inflated ego is you, ang0. You call me the egotistical one yet you act as though your life is falling apart just because someone else draws like you on the internet. Stop acting like a special snowflake, you are not the only one on this planet with an art style of that nature. I don’t credit you because crediting you makes no damn sense. Why should I credit someone who’s had absolutely no impact on my work whatsoever? What in the hell did you do for my drawings that makes you deserve so much credit? Did you sketch it? No. Did you line it? Nope. Did you colour or shade it? Not a chance. Just because I came up with a design for the characters that happens to look like yours does not mean I owe you jack shit. You cannot. own. a style. Get over it.

[4] “she worsened my depression and is the reason I can’t draw anymore! I have no motivation when there’s some idiot copycat stealing all my art!”

I don’t want to sound like that kind of person, but you worsened your own depression. You painted this false picture in your head and continue to hang onto that belief like your life depends on it. I haven’t done ANYthing to you. You came to ME with these stupid claims back when my art looked LESS like yours, before I even knew who you were. You’re making yourself feel horrible because you, for some paranormal reason, refuse to believe that you’re not the only one with that kind of style. This is why people call you childish, you’re like a whiny baby that can’t accept another child having a toy similar to yours. I can’t even decide whether I should say “grow up” because you’re older than me- not to mention you’re an ADULT.

[5]”she constantly sends her whiteknights to attack me, harass me and send me threatening messages!”

I’ve said several times to my followers NOT to harass you or your followers or anyone against me in this mess at all. I do not send anyone after you. People say things to you out of their own free will and with their own words. I can’t magically know when this happens, why they decide to and I especially can’t control anyone. I’m sorry that my friend Koro sent you all those DMs and horrible messages wishing a lot of very bad things onto you and your family- I asked her several times before and after not to do that, but I didn’t have a clue she did it until after the fact. Either way, don’t go around assuming that I put people up to this or I intentionally ask people to do these things to you. Why in the hell would I do that? What good does that do? All I wanted to do was talk things out but at this point, you don’t even take me seriously, so I can’t even try anymore. The few times we did talk you refuse to see my point of view and just see me as a liar. What the hell am I supposed to do then?

[6]”all vio does is lie, she’s so fake all the time, lying for her petty ego”

I’m not even sure how to respond to this but I thought I might as well bring it up. No matter what I do or say, ang0 sees me as nothing but some retarded liar that can’t help but lie their way around everything, even though I’ve been nothing but genuine all this time. It’s why I can’t even communicate with her anymore, because “shut up, stop lying you copycat” is all I get in response basically.

[7] her insane hypocrisy

Ange and pin_kpeach have said numerous times that I’m rude or insult her, and there have been times where I’ve been mean out of anger, but I know for a fact I apologized for it in DMs. Ange apologized too. I don’t remember ever insulting her after that, but ang0 doesn’t ever stop ridiculing and insulting me with almost every comment she makes on the drama. If she really was sorry, she wouldn’t have done it again, but I guess she said “fuck it” and just continued anyway. Pin_kpeach likes to say I’M the hypocrite for saying Ange is harassing me yet being rude to her a couple times, yet they do they exact same thing, but even worse?? I try my best to be as civil as possible, but ang0 and pink don’t waste a second calling me and my supporters all sorts of colourful names just because they don’t agree with her claims. In fact, here’s a list of every single thing ang0’s ever called me:

retarded, retard, stupid, idiot, dumb, low IQ, mentally ill, crazy, talentless, skill-less, copycat, art thief, (dumb) cow, fuckhole, asshole, bitch, wanna-be artist, unreasonable, clown, fake, liar, hypocrite, delusional, dick, stalker, bittershitter, dumbass, immature

There’s probably more than that, but that’s as much as I can remember. Not hard to forget when she repeats them almost all the time.

[8] gatekeeping ideas

Ange and pink act as if two people drawing a character in the same outfit automatically equals “du bist kopying mein style!!”. I can’t even begin to imagine the mental gymnastics you need to do in order to believe a thought process like that is logical. She thinks that anyone who draws Amy in a dress with a white under-skirt or white ruffles underneath is nothing but a copied idea from her. She thinks that me drawing Amy in a green tank top, blue backwards cap and blue sports shorts is copying her drawing of Amy in a green unidentifiable top (you could only see her back, she didn’t seem to have straps) and blue sports shorts with a slightly different design is automatically copied from her. The poses, shading, angle and idea behind the drawing were COMPLETELY different- but nonono, “this is stolen because the outfit is the same!” They also use the excuse of the whole chubby faces, curly hair, blah blah blah- see point [1] as to why that’s BS.

[9] her perception of my followers/supporters

Aside from Koro, I don’t know if anyone has seriously threatened or harassed her. Her followers comment on my posts, my followers only comment when she brings up the drama or whines about it. She insults my supporters when they don’t agree with her and act like they’re a bunch of immature brats who are wrong while she’s the high and mighty mature one seeing through non-existent lies. I’m used to her making fun of me, but I’m sick and tired of her insulting people who have nothing to do with the drama just because they don’t agree with her. Like, seriously? You call everyone immature and stupid yet you’re the one insulting people non-stop just because they realize how ridiculous and childish you’re acting. That’s why “childish” has become a popular adjective for you, ang0. BECAUSE YOU’RE BEING CHILDISH. CONSTANTLY. You get pissy, insult others and put people down but whine and cry the next minute because you constantly like to play the victim. Speaking of which...

[10] the victim card

I have absolutely no idea what ang0 goes through in real life, but there is no excuse for how she’s behaved during this drama AT ALL. Ange constantly defames her own artwork, calling it shit, calling it every bad name in the book, but doesn’t hesitate for a minute to gatekeep her style as if it was the best thing in the world. She says it’s because she “worked her ass off” and doesn’t want people just stealing her hard work. Okay, but you do realize that other people put just as much work into their own art, no matter if it looks like yours or not, right? She demands that people change their style to stop looking like hers, acting as if that can be done in a matter of minutes, because people having similar styles makes her uncomfortable. Well, surprise motherfucker- welcome to the internet. No one is original and everyone is original at the same time. People are bound to come up with similar ideas and you’re just going to have to deal with it. But despite the similarities, people are still original in their own right. If you believe that people can change a style so easily, why not just change your OWN style? Because you worked your ass off? Well, THEY WORKED THEIR ASS OFF TOO. So don’t act like you’re the only one who’s put effort into their craft. Art is hard, and that applies to EVERYONE- even professionals.

You blame me and other “copycats” for all your problems, blaming us for worsening your depression, ruining your passion for art- when you’re the only one who does this to yourself. Yes, there have been genuine art thieves in your life, and people who have stolen your art- but what I’m talking about are the people like me who DON’T steal your art or are merely inspired by you. People who say “you should be happy they’re inspired!” aren’t saying “you should be happy they’re copying!”. They’re saying that you should be glad that your work is so inspiring that people create their own unique ideas based off your own. Inspiration doesn’t require credit unless they’re purposefully taking a massive part of the original. But being inspired by a hair style or even a pose isn’t stealing. It’s inspiration, that’s it. I’m not inspired by you at all, but I can at least appreciate your art- even if you think I’m just being fake.

[11] ang0mang0′s history and why this shit doesn’t even make sense

Ange has said publicly and to me in detail about how she’s been accused of the same “art style theft” in the past. From what I’ve gathered or heard, people used to accuse her of copying a popular artist called myly14 who’s Sonic art is pretty much everywhere. Whether it be in edits, MVs or whatever else. Looking at her old art when she went under the name sonicfan799, her art does look similar to myly’s, but ang0 insisted that she didn’t copy myly and didn’t even know who she was. She legit said “it’s not my fault my art looks like someone else’s”, so basically- it was coincidence. She said she changed her art style because she “isn’t an asshole and didn’t want to make the other artist uncomfortable”, even though art style theft isn’t a thing and no one needs to be forced out of a style just because someone else already draws that way. I have no idea what myly’s stance on that situation was, but the fact that it happened just proves how stupid her current claims are.

Ange says that her style is “too complex” to be coincidentally similar to someone else’s, even though the fact that it’s happened 30 times (according to her) just proves that no, ang0, no it fucking isn’t. Your style isn’t complicated at all. Detailed sure, but no style is too complicated to be similar to another’s. Being complex doesn’t make something any less likely to be identical to another complex style.If you didn’t copy myly14 in the past, what right do you have to accuse me of the same damn thing? If I really am copying you, then you have to admit to copying myly, because you can’t just lie about your past and then shit on me for doing the same thing. So it’s either you stop this nonsense or you drag this drama down with you to your grave and admit you copied myly14.

Another thing, myly14 didn’t even have a “simple” style. The fact that her art was almost instantly recognizable and popular meant that she had a signature style that stood out. Yes, she used a lot of the original Sonic style’s anatomy, but her stylization of said anatomy, her shading and the way she composed her pieces gave her a signature style. The most stylized thing I could see was how she drew muzzles, and guess who drew muzzles in a similar way as well? You did. People saw how your way of drawing faces and some parts of the body and thought it looked liked myly’s. The similarities in your anatomy, and not your shading or colouring, was what made people think you copied her. That exact same thing is happening between me and you. My shading, colouring and composition is entirely different from yours, but some parts of the anatomy are similar.

If you really didn’t copy myly14, you have absolutely no. fucking. excuse. to accuse me of the EXACT. SAME. SHIT. that happened to you.

You never needed or deserved to be pressured out of your old style just because people thought it looked similar to someone else’s, and that’s why I refuse to change my style now. Because it isn’t. fucking. fair. To ANYONE.

[12] how I feel (this is copied over from my DeviantART)

At this point I've grown used to what she has to say, but it still hurts. She thinks that I'm some kind of cartoon villain maniacally laughing behind a computer screen every time I post something because she's so deep into her belief that I really copy everything she draws and that nothing I've never posted has any true effort put into it. She genuinely believes she owns all my art and that I devote my entire gallery into recreating her image or some crazy shit like that. It sounds really dumb, but from what I've read from her poorly constructed comments and rants, that's basically what she believes.

She thinks I don't care at all about how all this affects her or anyone at all, but I do. It doesn't just hurt me in the sense that she makes me feel awful with all her insults, but I just feel so bad for her. I feel guilty in the sense that I couldn't do anything at all to help her, not that "shes prolly feeling guilty and made that april fools joke to let out some guilt!!". (If you don’t know, on April Fools Day, I changed my Instagram bio to say “clown” and call myself “the ultimate copycat” as a joke.) That was a really stupid reaction from her by the way... who the hell comes up with that? Now that she's going away for a month, I feel even worse because all I wanted to do was try to make her come to her senses and end this mess. I thought I could talk some sense into her- that didn't work. Her delusions are so strong, she's like a brick wall. I thought I could ignore the drama- that didn't work. She "clowns" and talks about it so annoyingly often. Not to mention people do things on their own to stir shit up. I thought I could support her regardless and maybe try making her feel better about her art- that didn't work. She thinks I'm fake and that everything I say is a lie. Because of me, she probably doesn't believe other people too- and that makes me feel even more terrible.

No matter what I do, I'm automatically the villain and she's the tortured, helpless artist that everyone is against because "everyone is dumb, supporting a copycat" and she's just "used to it, because she's dealt with so much shit already!". It's so ridiculous. If she would just try to actually better herself or the situation, she wouldn't feel so horrible all the time. Like... for god's sake, she relied on a video game to make her happy- that's not healthy, and just like I suspected, it didn't fucking work.

more of how I feel

Because of ang0, I just feel like garbage. My self esteem and confidence in my art was already low. Thanks to her, I don’t feel original (or as original) anymore- and I’m afraid to show many of my new or old ideas because she or her whiteknight pin_kpeach may spring out and say “copycat! stolen! you’re not original!” and a plethora of other insults. I can barely sketch or draw Sonic content without panicking and feeling worthless because all I have is her words and her opinions stuck in my head. She blames me for her demotivation and shit like that when she’s done the same thing to me. She thinks I don’t care about her or her art, when I do, but when I say that, she calls me fake. In reality, ang0 couldn’t give a damn about me and I’m pretty sure she’d be happy if I were dead. She has said before that she doesn’t care if I killed myself soo... there’s that. Anyway lemme not drag my feelings out too long, I just thought I’d say it to anyone willing to listen since her immediate response would’ve been “fake, liar” etc, etc. I really don’t want anyone to feel bad for me or anything like that, I just want people to listen and understand. That’s all.

a final note

I’m really thankful- like, REALLY thankful- for everyone who’s been on my side throughout this. I don’t like picking sides, and I’d hate to make people do so, but there doesn’t seem to be any in between to this at all. It’s either you believe I’m copying her or you don’t. Most people don’t- thank goodness for that- but some do. And there’s nothing I can do about it. At this point, whatever man.

Please please PLEASE do not harass ang0. Don’t threaten her, don’t insult her, don’t do anything rash or fucking illegal. It’s all fair game if you want to POLITELY SPEAK to her, or try to start a discussion, but please don’t do anything stupid. And especially don’t do things in my name. If you want to debate with me or her, do research first- don’t just jump to conclusions or make assumptions.If you want nothing to do with this drama, then simply don’t say anything- just be aware of what’s going on, that’s all I ask. So nobody gets the wrong idea on either side.

Sorry for this being so long, I think I’m done for now.

Thank you if you read the whole thing.

[9.4.2020]

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noxus-the-venomous-blog · 5 years

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Part 2.02 KICK THE WORLD FACE

"YOU MOCK MY LAIR?!" Noxus grabbed the man by the collar. "You dare come into my place of dwelling with lll words?!"

"We're really doing this?" Big problem asked with a sigh as he watched his smaller friend building up steam to torment the man in his clutches.

"I will reach inside of your meager brain."

"Yeah now I know we're definitely doing this." BP sat down, awaiting a long monologue.

"And when I'm finish twisting and turning every spark in your meager mentality…"

"Oh come on this is often the funnest part of the day!" Tranquill said to big problem, poking him in his gorilla like shoulders.

"...and when all that's left of your brain is the shallow pleadings of a child's mind you will kiss my boot and beg for me to end your life."

"Dude I'm not even the one who gets to keep the rent money I just collect it. The management decides the when the inspection happens! They only pay me like 50 bucks a month," the young man grumbled, held tight in the rubber fists of Noxious.

“Is it worth your life?” “Fine dude we can do the inspection next week. You need to be on medication bruv,” he remarked as noxious loosened his grip on him.

“The whole world needs to be on medication…” Noxious said slowly as the man walked away. He then turned around to face his audience who was already snickering at him “That was Jeff, the supers assistant. Good kid. So let's get down to business”

“To COMPLETE! The PUN!” Tranquill shouted, smiling widely. Her joke found no success however, in a crowd where one was too old for reference and the other was too uncultured.

“Is this really the place to talk… Private? Like that dude weird girl across the road has been sitting there filming you for the past twenty minutes.” BP pointed across to the set of parallel storage containers on the other side of the lot.

“That's um…. That's my PR TEAM! FOR FILMING PROPAGANDA!”

“YO BIG GUY TAKE OFF YO PANTS!” the woman yelled.

Big Problem shot her a puzzled look. “Lets go to my place Nox. This place smells like raccoons and sadness.”

“You have a place?” Tranquill asked as she grabbed her coat.

“Yeah of course. Do you guys think i only exist in the world to help ya then when i'm done i teleport to another dimension and sit around waiting for you to need help again??” “That would be very useful” Noxious replied.

“SHAZAM!” Tranquill added.

“Well that's not my power. Although i met a guy like that, nice dude, gay as a rainbow on a unicorns butt, now can we go to my place?”

“That's homophobic” Tranquill accused.

“Im quoting the guy, besides i'm a villain, social standards are the laws i’m LEAST worried about breaking.”

“We shall ride to your lair and resume our business there,” decided Noxious, “Um…. we need a ride though.”

“Heh… I'll bring the truck around but you’re going to be a little cramped.”

The truck putted down an empty highway, bellowing black smoke out from its aged, rusted exhaust. It slipped and stumbled in momentum each time Big Problem had to jam the clutch down and shift. The old metal shifter smacking into Noxious’ leg every time the lowest or highest gear was used. Tranquil, leaned in on Noxious’ shoulders affectionately, squishing him closer to BP who already took up most of the truck.

“Ok so we can start talking now. I need to know how seriously you two take this. How focused are you?”

“I take it very seriously,” Tranquill said.

“Well now you do,” Noxious contradicted.

“Well ok sure for the first few months i was pretty sure we were larping but im totally caught up now. I share his passions for this world and this work. I agree with every word of his personal diary.”

BP raised an eyebrow. “You guys share your diaries?”

“Define shaRE-” Noxious was cut off as first gear needed to be used again.

“What you two need is money.”

“We’re not greedy though,” Tranquil rolled down the window slightly, noticing her boyfriend sweating a bit due to his awkward seat status.

“OF COURSE YOU’RE NOT! You’re poor. Greed is a rich man's game. Look you don't have to have a mansion in the hills, but no one accomplishes change in the world without money. I know a guy who works for a place. That's not me being coy that's literally how you refer to his business. Anyway, he can really make the difference for you guys. How do you currently wash your money?”

Noxious spoke up before Tranquill could make a joke, “we basically don't. But we don’t make enough to require it. We have been seeking out some form of fence for jewelry or other valuable things that are easy to sell.”

“That’s adorable. Yeah just sign up at the evil guildhall and they introduce you to ye olde jewelry fence. Look little guy...”

“I AM AVERAGE SIZE!!!”

“That's why you’re sitting in the middle then?” BP says as he rams the shifter into Nox’s leg and slows at a stop sign “Anyway, hear me out. You don't just run around town looking for random junk worth money, you’re a villain not a crackhead. You need to talk to the right people, the ones i'm going to introduce you to, and find out what they would want. Sometimes it’s an object, sometimes it’s a service. Sometimes it might be something right up your alley like gassing someone or making menacing threats.”

Tranquill chimed in, “this is what we need, he makes so many menacing threats for free currently.”

“Exactly. Now if ya find a bar of gold on the ground, or happen upon a car made of diamonds, then sure you bet your ass you take it and just give it to the guy and he’ll give you credit. But nothing compares to what you can make by finding them just what they need at a given time… Ok we’re here.”

The truck pulls up to an old iron security gate. Before them is a long driveway, weaving through clusters of lavish landscaping. He presses a button on the worn out sun visor then shuts it as the fabric nearly tears. The gate in front of them opens and he begins driving through.

“Wait… When… What…” Noxious stuttered, “ARE WE ROBBING SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?!”

“Yeah cause if we were, im wanting you to just scream about it,“ BP joked, “no this is my house, and it's nice to know you seeing it makes you want to rob it. Guess i'm doing a good job with it. Were gonna pull around back, wait, how the hell would i have a gate opener for a place i'm robbing?”

“I don't know…. Stole it ahead of time? Hacked it?” noxious knew he was digging his own grave deeper.

They pulled around to the back of the quite sizable home and into a ramp leading to a parking garage, one story below ground. This presented a stark contrast to the lush gardens they had recently passed. This basement was empty and plain, with a sofa on one wall crowded around a large tv, and a bed across the way on the adjacent wall. BP slowly pulled into a parking spot next to a luxurious looking car.

“See look at this place we have WAY more privacy to talk here. The whole place is sound proof. I'll have Alfred order a pizza and we can start talking about real business.”

“No you have to explain first,” Noxious insisted.

“Explain what?”

“EVERYTHING!”

BP leaned back on the broken tailgate of the truck “Uhhh… So in the beginning there was nothing, then BAM than mars and stars and cows and shit.”

“How about first WHO’S ALFRED?”

“The butler.”

“You have a butler named Alfred?” Tranquill giggled.

“Yeah i thought it would be funny.”

“What would be?” Noxious asked, getting dizzy at all he's had to take in.

“To name my butler Alfred.”

“WAIT YOU NAMED A BUTLER?” Tranquill protested in sheer confusion.

“You guys have a hard time staying on topic.” BP guided them over to the rather homely couch and they each took a seat. “So missy. I'm gonna ask you again. How serious are you about being a criminal.”

The tone of the room became more serious all of a sudden.

“I would follow him wherever he goes. Seriously. Even into the bathroom.”

“She’s like a cat,” added Noxious.

BP interrupted them. “You need to quit your job.”

Tranq looked at the ground for a moment. “But… My debts. I worked hard to get a job in my field.”

“And you'll never be worse off for it, you'll take those skills with you into whatever you do but do you really wanna be working an office job when the cops show up? You guys have to start living this, it ain't the kinda lifestyle someone does on the weekends. You gotta be done with the nine to five, done with the rented storage shack and done with the BS small time jobs. I want you guys to move your lair in here, i want you guys to start taking jobs with me and get yourselves a proper home. I want you guys to win on this and i'll help but if it's not what you want, what you truly desire, then you gotta walk away before someone gets hurt.”

“This is…. A lot.”

Noxious stepped forward. “My burden of fixing this world is not something i want dragged into.”

BP stood up to outmatch noxious in height if not determination. “You’re not going to get what you want without help.”

A moment went by. The two of them stood in a quiet stillness like an old western movie. The energy seemed aggressive but it felt more compassionate than that. Noxious knew that in this moment BP was not questioning his motive, but instead he's being forced to question it himself.

“I want to quit my job,” Tranquil broke the silence, “I want out of that stupid storage container. I want the neighbor girl to stop whistling when i wash the van. I WANT TO GET RID OF THE VAN! I HATE THE STUPID VAN!”

“I HATE THE VAN TOO!” Noxious matched her energy “I HATE THE STUPID SHIFTER KNOB! It has no button and my thumb sits on the side of it funny.”

“I hate my job. I hate my debt. “

“Even if the button didn't function, it should still be there.”

“I hate all of my co workers. All of them. There's not one redeemable thought made in that building all day. I hate work i hate school and i hate everyone. That’s why i'm here. I want to wreck this world not just live in it.”

“THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT! LET'S KICK THE WORLD IN THE FACE!” BP grabbed a beer.

Noxious moved his hand in a ‘kinda’ gesture. “I'm more on the fixing it side… With gas.”

“YEAH let's tear down society!!!” Tranquill exclaimed.

“I'm like… Chaotic good if anything.”

“LET'S KICK LIFE IN THE BABY MAKER AND MAKE OUR OWN WAY!!!”

Noxious looked at both of them. “Screw it, burn the world down” he said as he reached down for a beer for him and Tranquill. They all clanked cans, BP and Tranq opened and chugged their beers. Noxious paused for a moment, then opened his beer, pulled up his mask and met their pace.

-----------------------supersecretspecialdeletedpatreonexclusivelike&subscribeOVENDING

“He was choking me man. He threatened me!”

“Who?”

“The little gas mask guy. The one from space 25.”

“Oh him. Leave em alone he just talks that way.”

“BUT HE THREATENED TO GAS ME!!”

“Out of everyone in this whole park he's the only one who visits my mom. No clue how they met but she loves the little guy. He's got a big heart. Since he's been around her depression is unnoticeable. She's baking more, laughing more. Seeing her happy and tasting her food again has lifted my spirits too. Leave him be, he makes people happy.”

#original content #original character #original fiction #original story #Noxus

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sala218 · 7 years

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Hi! I'm also watching Tales of Zestiria, but I can't play the game. I saw your posts about how anime isn't... accuarate at best. Could you tell me more about the changes in the story that anime made? With spoilers and everything, I'd like to know how much I'm missing.

Oh dear did they change A LOT!

While I’m not most knowledgeable at all Tales of Zestiria lore and for more accurate of everything-what-anime-mess-up @talesofsymphoniac would definitely know much more.

But lets just say 1st season for biggest part was somewhat close to original except the very end where it started to deviate so much more, and personally I think that that’s the beginning of down fall of the anime.

Aside minor things like Berseria moments that would have been so much cooler if whole anime was done differently, they weren’t in original. And I don’t find myself missing those little bits in game, I mean it does give bit more depth to to the lore and all, but like it was a good idea but it sort of just flopped.

Then lets tackle Alisha matter, in game she left party before Rose joined, she was quite great character and while I did wanted more of her, the way anime gave us Alisha, in my opinion was way sad. In game she grew so much, and although hurt because Maltran actually had been hellion and betrayed Alisha, honestly I’d suggest to look it up on google, that moment actually made me tear up, unlike how we had Maltran as supportive mentor in anime till the end, all that drama with Alisha’s father frankly wasn’t given in game and in anime itself it sort of fell flat…

Rose joined part COMPLETELY differently, she saved Sorey after he first faced Lord of Calamity in Glaivend Basin, and she is afraid of ghosts, having seraphim speak to her without her seeing them had terrified her, even after she could see them, at times they still scared her when she heard only their voices. And what happened in anime? Oh but of course she spoke to Dezel calmly even though she COULD NOT SEE HIM. and while its minor deviation, I think it kinda gives more character to her, but whatever…

Anyway Rose story line deviated FAR too much to make comparison,

and so it failed some Sergei moments, but at least even in cluster fuck of what anime is he still fairly same in the personality wise, at least.

Back to squires for min, Alisha never got armatus, she just didn’t have big enough resonance, that in anime was completely forgotten but oh well,,, Also none of that telepathic bs with squires and shepherd.

Dragon purification in game was impossible, unless you count Maotelus, but for that Sorey went to sleep for who ever knows how long. And the fact that Edna had to give up on purifying her brother and accept that only way to save him is to kill him, and in game for me it was actually emotional moment too, but in anime, they can save him,,, and so like yay? I guess… I like Eizen, really but whole purifying dragons just takes away from Sorey character bit too much…

Reason why Sorey was amazing protagonist in the game, because he was simple nerd, he wasnt all that special, didnt have grand ambition till later on in the game, after he saw world and all, and not making him any better than other Shepherds that were before him, keeping him as human as possible, that made him amazing, but in anime he suddenly can purify dragons that no one could before him, I’m sorry what? Also maybe due to keeping game mechanics consistent you couldn’t armatize with all seraphim at the same time, and honestly it was quite nice that there were ground rules, they kinda important, anime seems to be going like whatever seems cool, and I kinda understand why anime only fans would like it, but for those who are familiar with the game, its like ripping all the world rules apart and throwing it all out of the window, well not cool…

Mayvin, the story teller was really important too, he told of how the Lord of Calamity was born, he, true to his title, told what truly happened in the Camlann, and boy it was far more important then just birth of the Lord of Calamity, it was also Mikleo’s and Sorey’s back story, and why a human boy, Sorey, was in care of Zenrus, a seraphim. Because you said spoilers are okay, let me tell you that that the baby Mihael sacrificed was actually Mikleo, hence why he is a young seraphim and even was show as a child while none of the other seraphim were, seraphim were once humans, unless its animal seraphim, but you get what I mean, yea. And while it was hinted in anime with the tiara thingy he took from Muse, if you knew about it you see it right away, but not sure if everyone could have made the connection, not saying no one would, but yea, it was truly down played,,, Also in the original, now, it’s been while, but Im pretty sure Lailah knew of how it all ended in Camlann, also in the game all party saw the story, not just Sorey and Lailah, so it had far bigger impact.

Symonne never turned to dragon, and lets keep it at that.

Honestly anime changed so much details, that drawing a comparison is almost impossible anymore. Its like an AU, with many major important and not that big details that made the game so charming completely ruined. Its like anime have completely different set of rules that weren’t even given to us properly.

Surely, when you aren’t familiar with source material at all, it is cool anime. I have seen even those that are familiar with the game and enjoy the anime. Personally to me, I’m just waiting for it to end, to see if they put it as some sort of Tainted AU, or they keep to original ending, but that seems unlikely,,,

I’m sorry, I’m just very salty, if you liked the characters I do suggest to play the game or if you cannot, then watch walkthrough on youtube or something, its good story, it really is. It’s just that anime changed so much, destroying most of what I loved about the game.

@llevellynvaneck

#toz #tozx #tales of zesteria the x #im very salty person atm #llevellynvaneck #its just too much that was changed #im still watching it out of spite honestly #like give me your worst #but as stand a lone #i guess its fine?#sala speaks #answered #long post

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marianneainotar-blog · 7 years

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Red Ball Jets

Run faster, Jump higher!

I would be sweating, running in navy blue gym shorts, my name embroidered on the lower right hem. The white Red Ball Jets on my feet proclaimed to the world that I could “run faster and jump higher, ” but I skidded to a sudden stop at the centerline, super sneakers squealing on the wood gym floor, and thrust the basketball through multiple leaning, reaching hands to my counterpart on the other side. She’d go dashing away, hoping to make a basket; I would try to stop my momentum, so I wouldn’t tip over at the line. Then we waited, at the ready, for the ball to come our way again. Voices echoing, jumping, running, reaching, our clumps of girls made their way back and forth on our half of the court until the shrill whistle of Miss Hill, the gym teacher, would put a stop to the mayhem.

It was 1959. I was starting 7th grade, and I loved gym. I had been a genuine tomboy in elementary school, playing softball with the boys at recess, marbles in the dirt, and riding my bike no-hands down our blacktop road. I tended to come home, dirty and disheveled, folders frayed, knees bruised. My mom would just shake her head. When someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would retort, “just a plain woman.” I didn’t have a clue then—or later.

In junior high, ideas of what girls could be or do started getting defined. We couldn’t participate in official school team sports. We couldn’t wear long pants in the classroom. Living through a six-month winter meant we stuffed pants under our skirts for the chilly walk to school and stowed them in our lockers. In addition to half-court basketball and the dreaded dodge ball, we did calisthenics in gym class to trim our waists or slenderize our fannies. With her tight ponytail, no make-up, muscles, and no-nonsense attitude, Miss Hill was considered “butch.” We didn’t want to be like her. Getting muscles wasn’t feminine. By 8th grade, most of us pubescent, our upper body exercises were done to the chant of “we must, we must, we must increase our bust.” We tried to get out of gym. Who wants to sweat and then go back to class? Deodorant didn’t do the trick for me. I frequently exhibited large, wet circles under my arms. “Um, I’m having cramps, do I have to dress for gym?” “It’s that time you know, and I have a headache.” Ok. Sit on the side.

Going to dances became my thing. The starched petticoats of elementary school gave way to sneakers paired with slouch socks and leggings, topped by a white “boys’ shirt.” I moistened my pin curls in flat beer for long-lasting curls and used shoe polish to whiten my Red Ball Jets. With stiffened shoes and hair, we girls would descend to the gym, which was now transformed by crepe-paper streamers and toilet paper flowers. When the music started rocking, pairs of us shot to the floor, sneakered feet flying and arms twirling each other—until a “slow dance” came on, then we all demurely scattered to a side (the girls’ side) and waited for the boys, who clustered on the other side. Who would be the first brave one to cross the centerline and come over to us? Our happiness was in their hands. We pretended not to care while we anxiously waited and made giggling small talk. Then the lights dimmed, Elvis would croon “Wise men say, only fools rush in . . .,” and we wallflowers enviously watched the handful of couples who slowly walked the floor together, sometimes even to the beat of the music. Girls didn’t dance together for a slow dance. That could be butch. Shy boys were out of luck too. We couldn’t ask them (too forward), except during the infrequent “ladies choice,” called by the chaperones.

By 9th grade, school sports soon became something my friends and I watched. “Girls aren’t allowed to do sports” morphed into “girls can’t do sports”—no stamina, no strength, no aggression, not competitive. Never mind that we could downhill ski all day or skate and swim for hours. My best friend and I hiked around Teal Lake one afternoon, fording streams and climbing bluffs. We went to all the basketball and football games, cheering the boys and learning all the chants: “two bits, four bits, six bits, a dollar, kids from Negaunee stand up and holler, hip, hip hurray, hip, hip hurray.” We even showed up at track meets. Being a cheerleader or a majorette, coached by Miss HIlll, was the closest thing to a girls’ sport. While these activities required some talent and dexterity, girls were clearly there to be pretty and to support the boys.

Our magazines and elders taught us more boundaries and behavior. “Don’t talk too loud, keep your legs together, and don’t lead a boy on.” Why? He could get blue balls, friends whispered. Really? They change color? Poor things. “Don’t let a boy get to first base too soon because he wouldn’t respect you.” This sports metaphor was confusing to me. A base just sits there, right? The player runs past, around, steals, or lands on a base. Were parts of our bodies the bases? First base, lips; second base, boobs; third base, “down there;” rounding home, “all the way”? We never talked specifically about first base or what “too soon” meant. We wondered about “petting” Was that second or third base? We heard what happened to girls who were “easy.” Then there was parking. You drive to a scenic spot, sit in the car, and “make out.” We were warned about making out leading to petting, which led to all the way. During our senior year, several girls disappeared for a time, visiting an aunt or some relative out of town. We’d speculate about whether she “lost” or gave away a baby. Sometimes a couple would get married and drop out of school. Gossip indicated it was the girl’s fault. She was leading him on and trying to get her hooks into him. Clearly she was easy, and he was helpless. Did they “have” to get married, we’d ask, with knowing looks.

In truth, we knew nothing. My mom didn’t want to talk about those things, so I would ask my five-years-older sister. If she was in the mood, she would let tidbits fall. She said petting could mean above the waist or below the waist, and both were bad but below was worse—yet another centerline that shouldn’t be crossed.

I remember accepting on some level the prevailing attitudes about women. It was common knowledge that “all the great chefs (writers, artists, composers, scientists, actors) are men,” or that “no woman can host the news.” We couldn’t compete with the gravitas of Walter Cronkite. The leaders we saw on our black-and-white TV sets in government, business, the arts, sports, and the military were all men. “Boring old men,” I used to say about all the talking heads on TV. Women didn’t have the guts, nervous system, brains, strength, agility, or whatever to do “x” well. We did have sexual power over men and were the keepers of the gate. They couldn’t control their urges, so we did. In addition, we were not to show them that we were too smart or too strong. They were the ones to run faster and jump higher in all areas of life. We could be teachers, secretaries, nurses, mothers, and wives. Nothing, of course, is universally true, and later I learned there were plenty of females at that time, striving to vault the centerline or erase the boundaries. Mostly women operated in the background, not making the news. I didn’t know about them. All I knew was that things didn’t seem fair.

In my senior year, I did “go steady,” wearing a boy’s class ring wrapped in angora yarn to make it fit. Lots of kissing happened. After graduation one night, I felt him briefly touch my breast through my clothes before he drove off in his car. Oh man! I had wild sensations when I walked in the house, nerves tingling. I sensed a line was crossed, but I didn’t realize until some years later what that pulsating in my privates signaled.

What next? My parents and I agreed I needed further education. I had good grades. Plus I need a degree just in case. Just in case, what? Just in case there was a war, and I lost everything but my education. Just in case I needed to dig up an educated man who would have a good job. Just in case, something happened to that future husband, and I had to work. Higher education was like having an extra dime in my pocket. I went to college, not thinking about what I might become but on the hunt for that educated man. Fall of 1965 began my freshman year at the University of Michigan.

On the surface at least in Ann Arbor, familiar uncrossable lines were in place. Girls had curfews in the dorms but boys didn’t. I guess they couldn’t get into trouble without us. Girls couldn’t be in the famous marching band or walk on the field in the Big House. I think there were intramural sports for us, but I hadn’t learned any team skills. In other aspects, Ann Arbor, like the rest of the country was in upheaval, resulting in protests and meetings with people who were against the Viet Nam war, for civil rights, for women’s lib, against rules, for drugs. I learned folk songs, smoked cigarettes, cheated on curfew, and sat in. We felt freer than we were.

Fast forward a few years—I had a BS in education, married an educated guy with a career, had two adorable children—got the dime in my pocket as instructed, but something was still out of kilter. I busied myself at home and with part-time teaching. By chance one day, I saw an ad for an aerobic dance class. Fitness for women was popular, thanks to Jane Fonda and Jazzercise, no beefy men teaching squats or Air Force exercises. Hundreds of women turned out for the classes, building muscle, losing fat, breathing hard, and we did it to music, learning complicated routines and making friends. After I became an instructor and then a manager, I learned that fitness led to real confidence. It became a portal as many of the women started changing their lives, one after another. I had not foreseen that strengthening my body would strengthen my will. I, too, went back to school with more clarity of purpose and became an editor—a job I loved.

I know now that barring us from sports in puberty affected our minds as well as our bodies. It took a new wave of feminism plus the legal clout of Title IX to make real changes. I don’t long for the good old days. I am content now because all parts of my life work well. Recently my husband and I attended a women’s playoff basketball game. He was commenting on the game—zone defense, breakaway shots, free throws; I was watching tall muscular women freely race down the whole court, arms pumping, shoes squealing. I always tear up. Every. Damn. Time. They don’t even need Red Ball Jets.

#halfcourtbasketball #rules #redballjets #aerobic #firstbase

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smoothshift · 5 years

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[Rant] Firestone Auto-Repair is an overpriced scam. via /r/cars

[Rant] Firestone Auto-Repair is an overpriced scam.

So I'm not very knowledgeable about cars or car repair, all I really know how to do is change tires, oil and have replaced my fan belt. I drive a 1997 Toyota Tacoma. Two days ago my tail lights were always staying on when I turned the car off, so I had to unplug the positive from the battery to keep it from dying (I didn't know about the stop switch fuse then). Today I took it into Firestone because I assumed it was a wiring issue. Got a call about an hour after I took it in, they said it wasn't a wiring problem but the brake switch stop pad is missing and the switch cluster needs to be taken out and fixed. They said it would be $180 for parts and labor, $65 for the part and $115 for labor. Now I didn't really know what this meant, but it was a very high price, and I was skeptical. I said I'd call them back.

I went online and looked up the price of a tacoma stop pad: $5 - $12 depending on where you get it. I looked up how to fix it; Literally all that needs to happen is you depress the brakes and put the rubber pad into the hole so the brake switch sensor can be pushed inwards. I was incensed. I went back and said I did not want the repair and paid an overpriced $100 for the diagnostic. Just got the $5 rubber bushing from a parts store and have installed the piece myself, no tools required, my brake lights now work properly.

I'm really pissed that they'd try to play that on me, or anyone for that matter. A 1200% price increase for a rubber disc, and $115 for something that just requires you to push in the part. Do they assume that no one is going to second guess their BS estimate? I will never be going to another Firestone. I very much need to learn how to fix my own vehicle now, because I don't even know how much they've probably been scamming me for over the past 5 years.

#reddit #autonews #auto #cars

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linktc5465 · 5 years

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First Post...What to say.

Sitting her Alone in an Apartment can get someone thinking.

Hi, My Name is as it is above. well, nickname actually. i’m based in tucson so things that are relatively random is to give a sort of idea.

I’m Not from Tucson Originally, i moved here from Oakley, California when i was 12 in 19...(Does Math...33-12=21 2019-21=1998) god i hope i got that math right. never was good at math. never was good at anything really... I was raised LDS and had a Mixed Religion household. Moms beliefs were whatever her husband/boyfriend believed unless they believed in the same faith as her, sister still a loyal member. my sisters are either Agnostic, Non-Denominational Christian and Pagan. me i am...I know there’s something out there. just unsure what. i have no Social or Religious beliefs. I believe though that if you need Religion to See yourself as a better person you’re not even worth the dust you stand on and if you would rather use politics to force people to believe what you do you are nothing more than a glorified bully.

i didn’t get out much. however when i was told someone was not to be associated with i was right there associating with them. and while the associated party was just as much trouble as i was told. so i focused on Games, Comics, Movies and i felt at peace. i started Writing Corny little stories, FanFictions, had a few eye-openers when it came down to my personal beliefs.

...Okay honestly i feel like... like i don’t belong here. i mean...I’m Straight. I’m not going to Lie, sometimes, Tumblr is seen as the “Gay Blog Spot“. I don’t find that many things offensive but “The Gay Blogspot?“ Really? Couldn’t think of a better Comparison like “Grab your Fandoms and Join us?“ Like “a Better Melting Pot“ where you won’t be booted out cause you won’t “Assimulate“ to decent Morals? Like Not being a Dick for instance?

No i don’t get offended easily. Probably shouldn’t more but Damn things do piss me off;

When i Was younger i was into All this stuff. I was into Pokemon, Comic books, Hell i knew about the Green Lantern and the Flash before they were on Justice League (Cartoon.) those were my Fandoms. i was picked on because of it.

Sometimes i envy everyone. i envy the Kids today were the Schools can or are taking a Stance against it. where parents are telling their kids “Stop taking shit“ and yet when i was younger it was Teacher: “are you being bullied?”

Me: “Yes.“

Teacher: “are you bullying them?“

Bully: “No.“

Teacher: “you’re both dismissed.“

and he would stay out trouble, Rinse. Repeat.

Dating wasn’t even that Easy for me. my first kiss came along and i was out of The Church and started to believe what i wanted to, Went to the same school she did, and ended up staying all because i didn’t want to go back to school with my sister and deal with the system they had of...basically, Intellects are Separated amoungst each other. (and the school is seen as one of the best charter schools here. huh, go fig.). but i’d get bounced around by the same girl throughout the years, Lied to, played or one who even decided to treat me like i was just something she can have. so my emotions are all freaked out because of that. but... i dunno. the more i felt the deeper i went into my depression and my own hobbies. even now, at 33 with my girlfriend i find myself only saying how i feel when i’m not really wanting to game or even write. yet i can find myself talking to some, Random Stranger who asks me “How are you doing?“. i don’t think it’s hatred, but a lack of Trust.

I trusted My mother, she tried getting me on social security and when i was denied, she lost interest. started looking towards my sisters more and more. leaving me in the dust. Dad treats me how Red Foreman treats eric. i’m not a father but i’m pretty sure that’s not how you treat your kids regardless on WHAT side you’re on. The Last Woman i truly loved ended up Cheating and leaving, only to return MARRIED and knowing i shouldn’t said “what the hell.“. My Girlfriends Mother treated me like her son only to force her to get the law involved into some BS charge. Remember what i said about Depression and me diving Deeper into my hobbies or Fandoms? Yeah. always question why i’m alone yet question why i push people away. why i prefer being alone and yet i have a Girlfriend.

a part of me wonders...if i wasn’t treated this way, if we got the better help needed like we had today would i still be like this? Answer would probably be Yes.

I Don’t like thinking about these things though. Things are different Now. AS a Result my Mom (You remember her, the Woman who Believes whatever her Relationship believes) is someone i no longer talk to. My girlfriend of (Pretty much) 6 years ended up leaving again. i am Working now so i’m no longer relying on wishing i had SSI. I have a place of my own that i hardly ever visit. and i drink more coffee than i should.

but am i Better? No. i mean, My girlfriend got some CBD edibles a while back nd i tried one and thought they would help.

NOPE!

fact they didn’t kick in at all. but they probably didn’t effect me. probably because there’s more Coffee in my system to even make one Leroy Jethro Gibbs go “you’ve had enough.“

hmph...NCIS. you know i watch shows like THAT mainly cause i find them entertaining? how is it i’m not political, and yet, i watch shows like the simpsons, where it got SO political, everytime a new headline comes up, the Simpsons are covering it the Season. Guess its because I find shows like NCIS entertaining. I prefer listening to Old Style Country and Rock. i have my coffee black and believe that a Persons Religious beliefs shouldn’t be forced on others. and that’s pretty much it...Really? Guess i’m just a Little old fashioned. and tired, and a little Ornry. using terms that no one else uses.

god i feel old...pretty much am. 33 years old. 33. 33 years old and a woman who is in her 50′s looks hotter than most of the women either 5 years younger than me or 10 years older than me. you millenials, remember when we were younger and our grandparents would come down Grandma made cookies and dinner despite your parents wishes and your grandpa would help your dad on the car to get away from your mom and Grandma because they started fighting? only to find out there was nothing really wrong with the car to begin with. yeah. now it’s like some guy could cheat on his girlfriend with her grandma, or even her grandpa. Damn seniors look good these days and yet i look in the mirror and i look ugly as all get out :/

And there we go...I’ve always felt Looks don’t really matter. you could be the most handsome or beautiful woman in your group and still be ugly on the inside. or the least bit attractive and still be gentle. or in reverse.

i dunno...

Depression, Social Anxiety, Self-Doubt and a lack of trust for everyone with a hint of personal beliefs make the cluster fuck that is...Me.

people tell me “Show some respect.“ Dude, Respect is Earned. Doesn’t matter of your race, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion or political beliefs we all earn respect the same way and we keep the respect. yeah there’s the given respect but treating people like crap won’t make you gain there respect nor will it earn you theres.

This is the crap i believe :/ and i gotta wonder sometimes if it’s even WORTH believing.

Now, i’m looking around and it’s...i dunno.

Feminsm feels more like attacking men just because their men while the real feminist wanna go “Nuh-uh.“

Bullying is now being dealt with Accordingly

Pokemon go is being liked by everyone.

being a part of a Fandom is now cool but there’s still the Toxic fans who want to ruin it for everyone.

Body positivity is either picking up or Dying out.

Which brings me to This...Why is it that to some women are aren’t attractive by some peoples point of views or societies view looks at others like they’re the uglist thing on the planet. and we Keep Bringing people down. I was heading back to my girlfriends from Work about 3 weeks ago or so, i was walking behind this woman who, okay was attractive by someones standpoints and i was on the phone with my girlfriend, i told her (my girlfriend) “Love you“ and waited for her response where i than proceded to hang up. this woman, looks behind her, to me, and starts walking faster to where she acts as though I’m being creepy and i was gonna do something to her.

1.) she wasn’t my type and

2.) if i were there were cops up at the cross sections (Night time)

and 3. i’m too damn tired to do a damn thing. yet if i thought she was creepy it’d be an entirely different thing.

Why is it we want to be kinder to everyone and yet there are still people who have to Knock a random stranger, who was ONE THE PHONE with his girlfriend and wanted to get home safe and secure, Down.

Can i Just Ask, simple and Calmly What have we Become? has many peoples Charges affected us as people to where we can’t even hold doors open to be nice, ESPECIALLY in Tucson where it’s sweating in places you didn’t even know you had sweat glands in, and be seen as anti woman all because you think to yourself “hey, this person could use help and i don’t want them to drop the presents, let the baloons go flying and Maybe Drop the Cake“. or in the case of that eone going up behind her while they were on the phone and actually say “I love you” to the person they chose to spend the rest of their life with?

Okay, Yeah, i get it. we gotta be vigilant now. maybe more than ever but REALLY?

i feel like i was born in the wrong year. feel like i grew up in the wrong time. both sides really. like i could have gotten the help i needed when i was younger but listen to the old music.

I don’t really know what to feel :/ so if you don’t mind...i’m gonna go back to playing Minecraft.

Thanks for Reading... it means a lot.

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