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cyncerity · 2 years

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Finding Family

Chapter 3

1 2 3

notes:

ITS HERE IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS CHAPTER

Literally I’ve had this moment in the plot planned for months. I’m talking probably more than half a year. It’s been in the making for a while, which might explain why it’s so long, i’m so sorry it’s like 4k words.

with that said, tw for panic attack, angst, and general cursing, and i hope you enjoy!!

The day it all started began fairly normal. The humans in their apartments woke up and made breakfast, like any other day, and the borrowers in their walls minded their business while waiting for the humans to leave.

On this particular day, however, three of those said borrowers were preparing for what may be the riskiest thing they ever did.

“And you’re sure this is a good idea?”

“Of course, bossman! We’ll be careful, promise.” Tommy said as he finished rewrapping the line to his hook, triple checking it before passing it off to his nervous looking best friend. Tubbo looked down at the hook and Tommy sighed, placing a hand on his shoulder. “We run at the first sign of trouble, nothing bad will happen. It’s just a little detective work nothing serious.” Tubbo laughed half heartedly. “Right, just a little detective work to see what’s up. Mom and Dad won’t even notice I’m missing.”

“We ready to go?” Ranboo interjected, coming up to the two with packs of back up rope and supplies he had been packing. Tommy looked to Tubbo, waiting for approval.

“Yeah, we’re ready.”

…

Packing up for a long trek was always quite a task. For Charlie, most of the time all he needed was a backpack, knowing fully well that Schlatt’s apartment was fully accommodated to him and it would be an easy trip. But going with other borrowers? That was different.

So he dressed himself like anyone else would, with backup food, water, ropes, and weapons in case there were any “wild animals.” He looked to Mochi, who was minding her own business at the other end of the room being fed by Minx, and laughed to himself. What kind of wild animals were they concerned about, anyway?

Minus Jambo. Seriously, fuck that cat.

It didn’t take Charlie long to find his group and meet up with them. He was accompanied by his captain, of course, and two rookies. Fundy, who’d gone borrowing a few times for survival purposes only before moving there and becoming a guard member. Apparently, though, since Charlie had been to Schlatt’s apartment numerous times with no issue, they said Fundy should try picking up borrowing again, despite his fear of humans. Meanwhile, Aimsey seemed over the moon. This borrower was younger than any of them, but had been bugging the captain to go borrowing, wanting to help out their colony any way they could, and this was their first time.

And with a few reminders from the captain and a review of the rules, they were off.

…

“So we just…wait here?” “It’s called a stakeout, boob boy.” Tommy sighed, holding a poorly handmade telescope through a high vent grate. “We wait here for the other borrowers to show up and watch them for any sus behavior. I saw it in one of Tubbo’s weird movies once.” “Isn’t that just stalking?” “We are far too cool for ‘stalking,’ its a stakeout.” “Quiet! Both of you, look!!” Tubbo interjected, pointing up to the kitchen counter. The thre of them watched as Charlie pushed a roll of paper towels away, gesturing to the kitchen, though they were too far away to hear anything being said. And they watched as three more people came from behind him, all strangers. One was tall and nervous looking, white streaks through his ginger hair. And with his pointed ears and slits for pupils, he looked almost fox like. And if they were gonna use animals for comparison, the next one, wearing a patchwork of blue and stripes and long hair under a beanie of sorts, was almost reminiscent of a bunny, the way they were bouncing and barely staying still, having a shocking amount of energy for a borrower even shorter than Tubbo. And the reason for their excitement seemed to come from the last stranger, who was talking to the three. For some reason, Tubbo got a sinking feeling in his gut while looking at him. He tried to ignore it and just focus on how he looked and not why the very presence of him made him feel as awful as it did. So he just looked, especially taking note of how odd he was compared to the other three. He had short brunette hair, and a red and gold pitare-looking jacket on, which struck Tubbo as odd. What borrower would go out of their way to make an expensive looking coat? Who would even get him those supplies? Wh- “Is that their captain??” Tommy asked, staring like he’d never seen another borrower in his life. “Uhh, what?” Tubbo asked, and Tommy snapped his head in his direction, looking confused. Looking past Tommy, Ranboo had the same expression. “What??” “Borrower colonies, they have captains.” Tommy explained. “They’re in charge of everything that happens in the colony, and I mean everything. All the big decisions come down to them.” “They’re like royalty in borrower culture.” Ranboo added. “So why would one come on a random borrower trip? And since when was there even a colony in this building??”

“…You think it’s the old one?” Tubbo asked, only to get more weird looks from his friends. “There was a colony here before? What happened?” Ranboo asked. “There was a whole colony just in this apartment! Have I never told you?” Both of the others shook their heads. “What happened to them?” Tommy asked quietly, like something bad was going to happen if he spoke any louder. Tubbo subconsciously touched his scars, only noticing he did so when his friends’ expressions turned to pity and he put his hand down quickly. “I was really little, I barely remember it, but from what I can piece together from my memories and what Dad and Jack said happened, it was bad. An extermination. No one lived, or at least we thought. But what are the odds that people not only survived, but started a new colony and went to a different part of the building?”

…

It didn’t take long for Charlie to get his group to Schlatt’s apartment. He knew the way by heart, but was holding onto an impossible hope that this time it would somehow take longer, delaying the inevitable. However, when he got there, he had to hide a sigh of relief. Schlatt was nowhere to be seen, probably messing around with his friends next door. Not a single ladder, rope, or haphazard handmade staircase in sight. No proof that a borrower lived here full time.

The captain led them all through what to do, what the rules were, and where everyone should look for supplies before sending them off. Charlie was the last to be sent somewhere, and he could see the look in the captain’s eyes, the same look he had seen a hundred times before in the eyes of the others from the colony that had once been in this apartment. Survivors guilt. Even when the captain was done giving him directions, he didn’t go immediately. He didn’t want to leave him to wallow in his self pity.

“If this gets to much, we’ll understand. You can go home, I’m more than capable of getting them home. I know this must be…hard for you.” The captain didn’t even look him in the eyes, just nodded. “I’ll be fine, Charlie.” Was all he said, only turning to give him a small grin to show he was ok, even if Charlie could tell it was faked.

So, he left.

God, he was glad Tubbo wasn’t here.

…

Aimsey walked across the tops of the few supplies on the kitchen, ears trained on any subtle noise that may let him know danger was coming. Lord knows it had taken him long enough to get up the few boxes on the counter, he’d hate to have gone through all that effort jut to be seen now, though Charlie had assured him that the resident human wasn’t home today.

Although, he was more scared of the part coming next.

Looking up, he spotted the cabinet holding the food he was supposed to get. And shit, was it high. But if Charlie could get to it, so could he. He just wouldn’t focus on how high it was, or how he’d be that high up, or how a fall from that height would kill him…

no. not thinking about that.

“Oh, fuck, oh my god.” Aimsey said, nervousness making his hands shake while swinging his flimsy paper-clip hook to latch onto a nearby handle. “You got this…” he whispered faintly to himself, fingers already turning white from his death grip on the rope before jumping off the counter and preparing for a tug on his middle from the belt.

…the tug should have happened after a few seconds, right?

…oh no…

It was like time slowed as Aimsey looked up to find that the hook had fallen off the handle, and, ok, maybe they should have checked that it was secure before leaping off the counter.

He screamed, trying to alert any nearby source (maybe not the cat, but it’s not like he could afford to be picky at the moment) to save him, and as the floor got closer and closer and closer-

he finally felt the tug.

He felt himself being pulled up from the ground, and practically went boneless with relief. Someone had heard, seen, whatever, his fall and went to his rescue.

He looked up, expecting to see his captain or teammates but…who was that?

The boy at the helm of pulling him up seemed just a bit taller than him (aka short by borrower standards) with fluffy, surprisingly well kept hair and a patchy green jacket. But what shocked him most was the myriad of (dare he say) horrifying scars on the boys face when he barely looked younger than her, scars somewhat similar to the ones the survivors of an old extermination from when the colony was newer held. She found herself unable to keep her eyes of off his scars until finally her eyes landed on his, an unsettling feeling filling her gut. Maybe because the hazel-grey color was familiar, or maybe because he didn’t look all too happy with her.

“You gonna keep staring or are you gonna fucking help?” the (apparently also british, which she didn’t hear often,) boy said, and, oh, she was pretty close to the edge, maybe she could pull herself up some. Aimsey took the hint to finish climbing up the counter and was quickly helped over by the scarred boy, who was quick to catch them as they collapsed breathless. Holy fuck, they almost just died. Cause of their own stupidity, no less. If the captain finds out about that, they’ll never be allowed to leave base again-

“Hey..Uh…you ok?” the boy said, putting a hand on his shoulder and shaking him slightly. “Tubs, they almost just fell to their death, give them a minute,” another, harsher, british voice spoke out, startling Aimsey as he quickly shot his head up. This other borrower was taller than the earlier one, though not as well kept. His clothes and hair were dirty, and his arms and legs were covered in scabs and healed over scars, more like the other borrowers Aimsey knew. And behind him was another more traditional borrower, though a good bit taller than anyone they’d ever met and had weird blotches of white that they’d never seen before on anyone, either, as well as split colored hair. But these two were just as unfamiliar as the last one.

“Who are you people??” Aimsey said, only for the three to immediately look at each other with horrified expressions before the tallest one spoke up. “Uh, we’re, uh…new around here! Yeah, we, um, just moved from another colony, but we’ve never seen you around before! Who are you?” He said in an american accent, weirdly enough. “Oh, I’m, uh, Aimsey! And you are?” “I’m Tubbo!” Said the brunette, shoving his way in front of the split haired borrower. “And these two are by best friends, Ranboo and Tommy!” He said, gesturing to the taller of the two and then to the blonde. “Are you from a colony?” He said, turning his attention back to her. “We weren’t aware that there was one in this building anymore.”

“Uh, yeah! My colony used to function out of this apartment i think, actually, but that was way before i joined.” “And you’re here with…?” “Oh, another guy said that this apartment was safe to borrower from, and my captain wanted to see it first hand and i needed the borrowing experience.” “Looks like it,” the blonde, Tommy, spoke up again. “Not checking your hook is secure is a rookie move. But, you said your captain is here, any possible way we could talk to him?” “Tommy!” both other borrowers shouted at once, making Aimsey flinch back. “We’ll be, uh, one second.” Ranboo said, before waking around a tall object on the counter and dragging Tommy behind him as Tubbo followed behind fuming in anger.

Aimsey couldn’t pick up much of the fight, but from what he could tell, they were fighting about meeting the captain, or whether one was “allowed” to, if he heard that right. But before he could even question it, Tommy ran back around, grinning widely as Tubbo glared and Ranboo looked anywhere other than the group in front of him.

“Alright, my friend,” Tommy said, eagerness clear in his voice, “lead the way.”

…

Tubbo couldn’t believe he agreed to this. He didn’t want to meet this fucking captain, at this point he just wanted to lock himself in his room. Uncle Charlie was right, he shouldn’t have involved himself in this. All he wanted to know was that the other borrowers weren’t evil, and Aimsey seemed as not-evil as they come. He could just talk about all this with his family later. Just a simple ‘hey i saw the other borrowers in the apartment today and they don’t seem evil, why aren’t i allowed to meet them?’ Then maybe everything could have been explained to him and he could have been introduced or something like a normal person.

But that wasn’t what was happening. Tommy had twisted his arm (damn Tommy and his impatience and surprisingly good negotiation skills), and, ok, maybe he felt a bit bad that Ranboo and Tommy had to live alone in the walls without company other than him and his family. Maybe Tommy had made a good point that if all went well, he and Ranboo could be part of a colony again. So here Tubbo was, unable to deny his best friends of something he knew they wanted desperately.

But as Aimsey led them closer to where he said the meetup destination was, Tubbo couldn’t quite explain the feeling that something was about to happen, nor could he figure out if said thing was good or bad.

He saw the excitement on Tommy and Ranboo’s faces and decided to ignore his instincts.

…

It had all gone to shit faster than Charlie could have predicted.

Meeting back up with the captain had gone about as planned. He was greeted by a man who was just staring out at the apartment before him, seemingly not having moved since Charlie left. He knew that his captain wouldn’t want to talk about it, though, so he just tapped him lightly and tried to distract him by listing off what he’d found and how hard it was to get it, as was protocol. He seemed more pleased, finally having something to take his mind off of the massacre that had left him a widowmaker and a guilty survivor to a slaughter that he apparently still blamed himself for, even over a decade later. Charlie eventually took to making small talk, trying to keep the poor man he called his captain from reminiscing even more on what had happened in the very spot he stood.

Eventually the small talk dwindled as they both saw a couple of hooks appear on the edge on the counter they stood on. Aimsey climbed his way up first, and, while they had both been expecting Fundy, Aimsey reached down to grab a much paler, unclaimed hand, and, to Charlie’s horror, helped to pull up Ranboo, who seemed very unsure of what to do with the situation. But to be fair, the captain seemed equally weary. Charlie, from his spot diagonally behind him, could see the captain’s ear raise and tail sway in curiosity, while Charlie was trying to physically express how frustrated and he confused he was to Ranboo in a terrible game of charades without tipping off either borrowers that he came with. Ranboo stared at the captain and only glanced at Charlie before two more hooks came over the counter. Ranboo quickly turned to help the remaining two borrowers up (not before slightly shrugging and mouthing ‘it was Tommy’s idea’ to Charlie), and the two of them pulled up Tommy and, as much as he’d tried to keep him safe and warn him, Tubbo.

…

It didn’t take very long. Tubbo had just been helped up to the counter and had only just managed to stand when the captain collapsed to his knees, head down in his hands. Aimsey quickly ran over to help him and Charlie looked back over at the group, unsure of what to do other than just give them a sympathetic look. Tommy and Ranboo at least had the decency to look ashamed, but Tubbo didn’t share their expressions.

He looked scared.

The four of them turned their heads as Aimsey helped the captain stand, letting him lean down on them to keep upright as he looked up to stare at Tubbo, tear lines clear down his face. It lasted what felt like hours before either of them said something, but the captain broke the silence. His eyes became glossy with unshed tears as he said only one word.

“Toby…” he whispered, trailing off, but Tubbo had heard it well, as his brows furrowed and his tail wrapped anxiously around his ankle. The man took a few steps forward, letting go of Aimsey and Tubbo reflexively took a step back away from him, making the captain frown. “What’s wrong?” “How do you know my name? My..my real name.” Tubbo whispered harshly, unable to keep the edge out of his voice, even when he saw the man begin to cry again. “Wh…What?” He sputtered trying to take another step forward as Tubbo backed up again and put his hands out in defense. “You heard me. Who the fuck are you and why do you know my real name?”

“You don’t remember me…?” He whispered desperately, and Tubbo felt a little bit guilty for having no clue who this man was. But somehow, he knew that he knew him. He knew the second he felt the weight settle in his stomach when he looked at him. He had no reason to be that weary of a man he’d never met, but like hell was he about to explain that. For one, Charlie would be pissed that he didn’t just turn tail and run if he felt like that, and two, this man already seemed distraught enough. The last thing he needed to be told was that just looking at him made Tubbo upset.

“…No,” Tubbo half lied. “Should I?” And that was all it took. Tears poured down again, harder than before, and he desperately tried to even out his breaths in between sobs. And, despite his precautions, Tubbo started to step closer. Whether it was out of pity or empathy he didn’t know. “…oh god, what happened to you?” He asked, reaching out to try and cup a hand around the scarred side of Tubbo’s face before Tubbo jerked back and slapped him away. “What the fuck, man?! You don’t just get to..to touch people! Personal space and shit! What the fuck is your problem with my scars, anyway? Not like you aren’t sporting a few yourself!” But the man just laughed, brushing and hand over his own scars, laid over his cheeks, nose, and eye, leaving his left eye dead. “Looks like we match…” he muttered to himself, pointing from his eye back to Tubbo’s own scarred and blurry one. “I’m sorry that happened. I’m sorry I.. I couldn’t protect you. I’m so sorry, Toby.”

“Sorry for what? What couldn’t you protect me from? What the fuck are you on about??” Tubbo yelled, getting more and more frustrated with how long this stupid conversation was going on for. He could feel the stares coming from all around him. Ranboo and Tubbo rightfully confused, just like he was, Aimsey looking on in slightly more awed confusion, and Charlie looked at him pitifully, as if he could understand something that Tubbo didn’t quite yet grasp.

“…You were my responsibility, and I let you get hurt. You were so young, and..I didn’t know where she hid you. I couldn’t risk the lives of anyone else, and I couldn’t even know for sure if you were even still alive so…I had to leave you behind.” He said, voice heavy with grief, guilt, and even more unshed tears, and that’s when Tubbo put it together.

“…You were my captain, back when I was a kid, people did survive…” he said, eyes wide as he pieced together why this man was so familiar to him, “my mum hid me in the vents when she heard the exterminator come in. I was the youngest, I couldn’t defend myself, I could barely walk. She didn’t tell you where I was, and you couldn’t find me, so…you left.” He said, meeting the captain’s eyes. “Is that it, then? You had to leave behind the youngest to save everyone else? You feel guilty that you left a toddler to live alone? Cause, if it makes you feel any better, I’m fine, man. I’ve been good.” He said. But to his shock, the.. his captain just stared. “Toby…what’s your last name? Do you still know it?” He asked, seemingly afraid of the answer. Tubbo thought for a moment, but just shook his head. “Not really. I have a new one now, though, so i guess it doesn’t matter as much.”

“Sparklez.”

“…what?” Tubbo said, the dread he felt getting heavier as he processed what the man had said. “Your name is Sparklez. Toby Sparklez.” And oh god, did that sound familiar, but not it a good way. Like he had some sort of negative association with the word. And it was his name, for fucks sake, if this man was telling the truth. “…ok,” Tubbo replied wearily, “…so what? Why…why is that all of a sudden so important? I don’t have a family, they’re dead, my mum is dead, my dad is..” he trailed off. In all fairness, Tubbo had no fucking clue what ever happened to his dad. He didn’t remember that fucker at all. All he remembered was his poor mother raising him alone, sacrificing her damn life to hide her only son in a vent to save him from certain death. Where was his dad then?

And as if the universe hated him more than it had already proven to, as if the multilaton of his face, the death of his colony, and the death of his birth mother hadn’t been enough, the man held out his hand to Tubbo.

“I’m Captain Jordan Sparklez,” he said, a genuine smile on his face and tears filling his eyes as Tubbo’s world began to violently shatter around him. “And I’m so, so happy to see you again, Toby.”

…

It was like all of the air in him evaporated into nothing, like his lungs had been crushed by led and could no longer expand. Every muscle in his body began to spasm, and he was slowly losing feeling in everything, spreading from his hands and feet up to his arms and legs like a disease. He remembered seeing Karl have a panic attack once, remembered how hard it was to watch someone he love feel so much terror, remembered the pain on Sapnap and Quackitys’ as they desperately tried to help him. He felt bad that the people around him were scared for him right now, but, hell, he was scared for him, too.

He felt hands, familiar hands, thank god, begin to grab at him as he collpased, and he saw the blurry outlines of his best friends help lower him and shout concerns and questions that were getting harder and harder to hear by the second as the world darkened around him. Ranboo tried to tell him it was ok, (even if nothing was ok), and he heard Tommy yelling at his d- the captain about something that he couldn’t be bothered to listen to, and somewhere in the blurry background he could see Aimsey anxiously just standing around, unsure of what to do. He felt himself be lifted as shaggy light caramel hair and a pair of shoddily handmade glasses came into view. Right, his Uncle Charlie was there to witness all of that, too. He laughed internally to himself, remembering the night he and his actual dad had spent trying to make those, when they realized how little Charlie could actually see. It had taken half an hour to unstick the hot glue from Schlatt’s hands, Tubbo laughing at him the whole time, and lord knows there’s probably still hot glue stuck to the counters, it was a mess.

He wondered if Charlie knew. If the reason he’d been told to stay away was because Charlie knew he couldn’t handle something like this.

Well, he was right.

“Take him back,” he heard Sparklez say, as the world began to simmer away, “Ponk and Niki will fix him up, and Eret will know what to do from there. They can get him what he needs. Just..Just hang in there, Toby.” He felt an unfamiliar calloused hand on his shoulder and, suddenly, he was out cold.

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