#A little bit unhinged on the blog today

[imminent-danger-came]

About the random chest that flashes over MK in the memory scroll:

I‘m pretty sure it‘s Azure. You can see the tips of his two… loose ponytails? (The hair that frames his face anyway) hanging down from his shoulders. Later, in his emperor form, we can also see he has the defined musculature.

And since Wukong was reliving all of his regrets in the scroll, the biggest ones flashing on the screen in that scene, one after another, it would make sense for Azure to appear.

Both because Wukong betrayed the brotherhood and lost his friends, and also because- well, Azure was the main antagonist of the season. It would make sense for him to be of importance for Wukong in this scenario especially.

I can‘t believe you failed to identify one of your favorite characters by chest alone. Smh. Fake fan, I think I have to unfollow 😔

(/j)

So. I had typed out this whole answer pointing out how absolutely shredded the silhouette was compared to every character in the show, and then I had this really good point, like (quoting my og post):

"And it's not that you're wrong, it would make complete sense for Azure to appear as part of the memory flashes—but then why not show his face? Why not make it obvious that it's Azure? Why be this weird about it, and have it framed so that when it fades it reveals MK? You gotta think why the writers and storyboarders would make those kinda decisions."

But then. But then I realized anon.

There's a line. Like Azure's fur color line

BUT HERE'S THE OTHER THING ANON. AZURE'S PAST OUTFIT (Presumably what he would have been wearing when this memory took place) IS ALSO DIFFERENT:

So I legitimately don't know. At the end of my og post, I had written a pretty funny joke: "Anon don't challenge my ability to identify my lego characters by chest alone ever again", but you were right to. I have no clue who this silhouette's identity is. I can't identify them off of pecs alone. Is it Azure? Maybe! Is it MK? Maybe! (Like, the fact that we get the pecs flash, and then later MK is revealed to have a war form that he has had NO prior training in makes me question some things. Like most of his abilities MK's learned to use, he just does it, and it's all weird.) Like:

BUT I DON'T KNOW.

#I can not believe I just went around through eps taking pictures of lego pecs #Like god. What a wacky situation to find myself in #A little bit unhinged on the blog today #If the chest is Azure why is he so fucking ripped there #Like what is going on #And if it's Azure then. Then ''Yet you insist on learning the hard way just as I did. I should have NEVER trusted the Monkey King!'' #then this is a MK and Azure foils moment which is based #But I literally have no idea!!!!! #THIS IS LIKE A SECRET 3RD MEMORY. #LIKE MY POINTS ABOUT NOT SHOWING HIS FACE STILL STAND. #SO LIKE. WHAT #Maybe there was something that happened between them post Camel Ridge fight but pre Azure being sealed in the scroll #Where an outfit change occurred #*puts gun up to lmk crew's head* Show me the storyboards so I can figure out what the fuck you were intending #lmk #lego monkie kid #asks #lmk crack #to me #lmk Azure Lion #lmk MK

[liesonthefloordramatically]

hello....it’s your friendly local prof here to remind you...please read the essay prompt with your eyes...the whole essay prompt...the entire essay prompt...please read the whole entire essay prompt with your eyes and then respond to the whole entire essay prompt...

#I'd appreciate it if people didn't reblog this; thanks #TEARING MY HAIR OUT. PLEASE. READ. THE PROMPT. #I have written the feedback 'please read the essay prompt' like five times today #anyway sorry it's finals period and I'm a little bit unhinged #Queenie actually says something on this blog #what is my academic life

[acircusfullofdemons]

rip 2 my irl friends who gotta deal with me infodumping to them abt my paracosms now lol

#maladaptive daydreaming #luka.txt #i told them abt storybook city (namely liw bc that has the most development) and they really like it #i started telling them a little bit about mad as a crow today and they were very nice listening to what my unhinged ocs like to do #i feel bad tho bc im always like context. context for this Thing within the context. its a very big web of context lol #but one of them said she liked how intricate my worldbuilding was so. thats nice <3 #id do that shit on here but the madd community has kinda vanished / is dead #not tryna diss anyone we all got our own lives n shit I know/respect that. it just sucks sometimes yknow :/ #also fandom scares me so im not nor will i ever fandom tag my posts here or on my fandom blog #if i ever talk abt my fictparas on there lmao #thats why i made blogs for them. partly. #lord help my friends if i ever tell them abt Phantasmagoria #technically i already have but its been a while so. itd be a VERY lengthy reintroduction lol #they do still know/remember it as the vr universe/story so. thats good at least!

[feralforfruit]

Countertop Whispers

A/N: I am writing this on a whim at 8am and I legit created this blog at 6am. I am unhinged and these hours are unholy. We are all here for the vibes and I decided to take matters into my own hands because I have an AA in English that I need to put to use. And this is going to be short btw. You fic writers always tease me like this so this is payback for sure. Xx

Warnings: if you don’t like sex with fruits, I suggest scrolling. NSFW, idek what else this is my first time doing this so please be kind.

Pairings: Tangerine x fem!reader

You hear the shaking of keys and the turning of the door knob of the front door. You pause your mixing, “Hey, my love! I’m in the kitchen!”

He sighs as he sets his keys down and hangs up his coat, releasing all the pressure of today’s hit job as he slumps down on the couch. Blood is sprinkled over his white button down. He rolls up his sleeves and unbuttons the top to reveal his shiny, sweat covered chest.

You look at him, tilting your head sympathetically. You tighten your apron and shake off the bit of powdered sugar you have on you. You grab a cup of iced water and walk over to the living room where your husband is practically meditating in silence. He notices you get closer and he opens his eyes with a glint of relief.

You sit next to him and hand him the cup. His mustache lifts ever so slightly as he sips on the refreshing drink. He pants after he gulps it down, placing the cup on the coffee table coaster. He looks at you lovingly. “Darling, you have no idea how good you look right now,” he says as he grabs your cheek and places a kiss on your temple.

“And you look like a mess but I believe you look sexiest like this,” you say to him while smirking sweetly as his breath hitches at the remark. “Making some cupcakes, wanna help me, handsome?”

“Too knackered to help, love, but I’ll definitely watch.” He says softly as he places another kiss but now below your ear. You giggle at the tickle of his mustache before you get up to continue with your sweetest of hobbies.

Tangerine takes his seat on one of the stools directly across from you on the kitchen island. He admires your dedication to perfecting your baking skills, and definitely has no complaints considering how delicious everything you make is. Usually, on every Friday night, he would always make time to watch you do your thing. He would chat with you about how your days went, what happened at work, how Lemon is doing, all while taste testing everything you gave him. Sometimes he offers to help you out when you needed an extra hand. But tonight, his mind is wandering into a place that makes him grateful that the countertop is covering his lower half.

He can’t get enough of you in that apron. It is wrapped so tightly around your curves that he wishes it were his hands instead. The sounds of your hums put him into a blissful state and it is so cute to watch you sway to the music in your head. The bit of flour on your nose makes him want to kiss it clean. You are used to him staring at you while you bake but right now his eyes are burning right into your hips.

He stays like this for awhile up until you finish mixing up some buttercream frosting. You sigh happily as you grab some with the tip of your index finger and bring it to your tongue. You suck on it for a moment and moan sweetly at the taste. Tangerine’s breath has grown heavy and the tightness in his trousers is becoming unbearable.

“Come to think of it, love, I reckon I would like to help out a bit.” Tangerine slowly walks around the island and stands behind you with his hands on his hips, still looking so dominant as he waits for your command. You squeal at his willingness, “Ahh, yes! Okay, here is the cutting board with some chocolate. Cut it into little pieces for me, will ya?” You peck his cheek and he blushes as he goes to wash his hands before grabbing the knife and dicing up the chocolate.

He is not exactly sure how small you want it cut so he pauses and asks, “This to your liking, love?” You look over to him and say, “Oh honey, I’m sorry, let me show you how it needs to be.” You grab the knife from his hand and slide in front of him, your ass brushing against him as you position yourself to where he was.

He hisses quietly at the contact then bites his lip. He thoughts run wild so he gets an idea and takes this chance to grab your waist from behind and rest his head above your right shoulder to look over it. Internally, you’re swooning at the position, feeling your heart skip a beat. You try your best to focus on slicing the chocolate while his thumbs rubs circles into your back, and you’re struggling not to moan at the sensation.

Tangerine moves his lips to the side of your ear and whispers, “Oh I see how it’s done. You do that so good, baby.” You shiver in response to his praise. “My girl is so good with knives, ain’t that right?” He pecks softly at your neck and you can’t help but stop your movements from your legs beginning to weaken at his words.

“Love, why’d you stop? Don’t you want to finish what you started?” he says as you whine, arching your neck back to be exposed to his affection. His lips continue moving on to the sweet spot below your ear as he starts to lift his left hand from your waist, to your beating chest, moving on to your neck, gripping it ever so slightly.

“I’m fucking starving, and you’re going to be my dessert, darling.”

—

part 2 is up!

#tangerine #tangerine fic #tangerine x reader #bullet train #aaron taylor johnson #atj #atj x reader #aaron taylor johnson x reader #tangerine fanfic #tangerine smut #bullet train smut #bullet train fic #my writing #tangerine x fem!reader #bullet train imagine #lemon and tangerine #bullet train x reader #tangerine imagine #tangerine bullet train

[xerith-42]

Hey guyyyys!! I'm baaack with a fresh batch of Laurance angst brought to you by "I really like this random design detail and will try my damnedest to make it make sense." The design detail in question is heterochromia!

Today's programming involves discussion of torture and probably some body horror

So, I'm a big believer in heterochromatic Laurance. It's just real to me. Because honestly both of his very distinct looks are serving cunt in very distinct Laurance Zvahl ways. I have a preference for his original appearance because I have a few bones to pick with Jessica's design decisions, but the pale blue and even blind eyes fit Laurance really well.

In a separate iteration of Laurance I made him lose one of his eyes before the rebirth process, so his heterochromia was unrelated to the whole pseudo-zombie thing. But in MCD... Well... Everything comes back to Shadow Knights.

Little Larry has beautiful emerald green eyes that then get utterly destroyed by the cruelness of the hell he willingly threw himself into to save those he loves. And uhhh, Laurance in canon says he was tortured down there. So let's get into that, shall we? Now, a thing about torture methods is that there's a lot of them, they're really easy to come up with if you have even a slightly sadistic mindset, and they are often focused. Most people who frequently engage in torture chose one field of the body to focus on.

Now let's look at Gene. Obviously for his magical and psychological torture, his focus is on the mind. But what about his physical methods? Obviously Gene gets his kicks out of people in pain, yet I think his real focus is when it gets personal. When someone isn't just in pain, but they are crying, shaking, writhing in agony while staring up at him cursing his bloodline. The eyes are the window into the mind and they say so much that the mouth can't when words fail or are restricted.

Gene focuses on eyes. He remembers them. They haunt him. When he's learning how to break people, he learns how to use their very sense of sight against them. It's already what he knows how to do with his magic and extreme gaslighting tactics. If he has a focus, if he has a piece of information he needs, and he has a target, then he'll focus on the eyes. If he, for example, thinks that Laurance has more information on either realm barriers or Aphmau, who is quickly becoming a point of interest for the Shadow King, then he'll have a reason.

But he can't possibly permanently ruin both of Laurance's eyes. He still needs another for at least semi-proper comprehension of how fucked he is. Gene doesn't need more than one eye. And I like to characterize Gene as a bit of a mad scientist, testing out his magic and Shadow Knight powers in extreme and unhinged ways.

Who knows what he did to Laurance's eye, what happened when he destroyed it and regenerative powers brought it back over and over. What effects traversing between realms had on whatever the fuck Gene did to make it so bad it didn't even resemble his original eye color.

Irene's blessing is able to mitigate the damage on his other eye, the one that was only blinded by realm travel, and bring it almost back to its original state. A pale sage color that has partial but still restricted vision. Laurance is grateful for what little eyesight he has. His other eye, the one Gene targeted... It doesn't come back. After the realm barrier blinded it, there was no undoing the damage anymore. It remains a cloudy pale blue, scars running across the skin around it and through his retinas.

I want to make it clear that Laurance isn't ashamed of this. He doesn't try to hide his eye, but he is cagey to answer questions about it. Most people are smart enough not to question, and he'll open up to the people he cares about (ie Garroth and Aphmau) when he's ready. I have a whole arc related to his blindness that's a whole side blog post I'm working on, but Laurance doesn't forsake the sight he has and he also doesn't lament what he's lost.

"Cad[endza] and Aphmau keep saying they want to bring my sight back. [I] know they mean well but... I can't tell them what happened. I don't think either one of them could take it. Garroth might be able to, but I don't think either of us trust each other enough for that conversation yet. I don't need my eyesight back, and I don't need anyone to fix my left eye. If they knew what that monster did, they would be grateful I have an eye to be blinded.

He doesn't encourage anyone to try and bring it back, and he might even get upset if they're too insistent about it. He's not exactly eager for another magic user to get their hands too close to an already severely damaged eye. He might not say it out loud to someone, but... [blinks my gay little eyes] There's a page in his journal that reads--

Text ID:

#aphblr #minecraft diaries #text post #laurance zvahl #aphverse #angst #its always angst #aphmau #mcd #mcd aphmau #mcd garroth #mcd cadenza #mcd gene

[parkissat]

Okay so I just wanna interact a bit more in this fandom because I've been lurking (for the most part) basically since June, but I love this whole unhinged fandom here XD Anyway hi I'm Parker and you might have seen my art on my other blog, but this is my main blog that I haven't used in ages

First I just wanted to say I appreciate everyone's posts cause they've brought me a lot of joy during shitty times especially in the last couple of months

Second, very random but I met one of my new bosses today and realized he kinda looks like Häärijä and I was dying XD

And third I wanted to leave this little doodle I made at work one day as an offering, so the post isn't so blah haha (I also shared this on the Kä discord back then)

#käärijä

[qapsiel]

Positivity anon here! Could I ask you to shout out to your five fave blogs? Just to make someone smile today and let them know you love their blog! Maybe even say a little about why!

I'm more than happy to spread positivity and love, and I'll totally ignore the audacity to only give me 5 blogs and just do more hehe

I'm gonna start with @ruinedmyself because Kas was one of the first people to talk to me when I ventured into the spn fandom, and they've done nothing but make me feel incredibly welcomed <3 I love our silly little chats and also the pain we inflict on each other regularly. We really do share one (1) braincell, and I wouldn't want it any other way. You've got such a fantastic grip on Sam, on his badass-ery but also his softer and goofier side, and I scream excitedly whenever I see I got a reply from you!

No Sam without Dean, obviously, so I gotta yell about @bloodsalted a bit. Dixon is an extremely friendly person, and I'm still glad I managed to sweet-talk force you into joining me in hell. Or heaven, I suppose, is the better word, because our interactions are truly GREAT. Whether it's sexy times or angsty shit, every reply is magnificent and makes me giggle. You write Dean in all facets that make his character so lovable: his fears and passions and his silly times and also his anger. I love him to pieces!

Who doesn't love the king of hell? Cas, probably, but I adore every interaction with @murderdeals because it enables me to use all the pissed-off Cas icons. When you write Crowley, I can hear Mark yell into my ear. And honestly, I would have never guessed that Cas and Cain could become such good buddies, and yet they somehow ended up being the bestest bee bros, and that's largely due to your fantastic writing and your excellent grip on a character that can easily be branded the villain without second-guessing.

@singersalvaged should always be included in my rant about lovable people because she's just so chill to talk to! A truly great person who has an amazing view of Bobby Singer and writes him in a way that makes me believe the guy is standing behind me muttering idjit whenever I read a reply. And Allie! Let me gush about Allie, who's Cas' weed friend and brothel companion, and every single interaction just makes me howl with laughter. They're absolutely unhinged and dumb, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

While Crowley makes Cas want to eat glass, @eyeless-smiles makes him want to tear his own ears off because Corinth is such a fucking asshole (affectionate), a True Nightmare, and I love seeing him annoy Cas in every single paragraph. It's just hilarious, and they never hold their muse back, which is refreshing these days!

Cas loves to steal kids (just look at Jack), so it didn't take long for him to steal @innerwar 's Homelander when he was still a child with Vought. And honestly, I just adore this verse and you, friend? It's so funny and yet also sad, and I'm just so unbelievably happy that Homie gets a better life with this and that Cas gets to be a Dad again, and your writing is just SO FANTASTIC and catches Homelander's young voice brilliantly. 

I gotta yell about @nightmdic really loudly for a second because she is a FREAKING MAGNIFICENT OC and both Cas and I love her to pieces. She's kind and nice and helps Cas through his forced humanity without finding him (too) weird, and Paige just casually managed to write one of my favorite OCs here on Tumblr with her eye for detail and well-chosen words 

And last but not least, a big shoutout to @bleakfated who writes a lot of different spn muses (among others) and yet manages to hit that nail (= the voice of every single muse) square on the head every time! I hear Balthazar's funny-ironic voice when I write with him, I see Jody being Mom when I interact with her, I get the British Mick Vibes when it's his time to shine. I'm in awe of how someone manages to juggle so many muses and give everyone their own little voice. Kudos!

#( ooc ) #(LET ME SMOOCH ALL OF YOU)

[notknickers]

aww thank you. I'm still learning to draw scars. I defo need to make time for more studies. (we both gotta buckle down)

oh man. fanart, if done well and a lot can get me to do almost anything. seeing fanart of Ghost back in November 2022 is what got me into this fandom in the first place.

I'm a bit picky with headcanons but yh. im fully aware a lot of them are just watered down to be vessals for our kinks and affection. At the end of the day. they'er our silly made up blurbos U///U but yh theirs defo gaps in these guys's personalities that we can fill in (which is what we're doing now lol from the short bios we're given)

fanart (nsfw) and audio of these blurbos together. I'm waiting on my lounge chair right now to be presented to me.

hey man. Rivals to lovers makes sense. I'm stumped with who would make the first move though. becasue like you said, both of them aren't the most affectionate of people and don't trust too quickly; at least on the battlefield. like they could respect each other on the battlefield and stuff. but to get them vunerable to love hmmmmm. might need to bend like a pretzal for either of them to act on their feelings even in the most subtle ways… unless we have one of them a lil more unhinged in this department. claps hands* What if Konig is the more unhinged one and Ghost just doesn't know how to handle his feelings or Konig, like, does anyone really wanna make the over 6 foot tall batterying ram upset. Anything can happen in delulu land

my fanart is literally made up shit if you were dating Ghost ooc XD

love that the whole fandom are in on the joke of eldritch/ocotpuss/cathulu Konig since the chibi drawings of him look like a cute octopuss and the bio updating and saying His hood hides something more hideous. I'll check out your fic….(hehe heat cycles)

btw. sorry for the late reply. fell asleep after work (¯﹃¯) also I'm bad with writing hehe

hey, don't worry. life outside the machine takes precedence! plus, sleep is gooood, rest to your brain while increasing your chances of dreaming of your blorbos! it's a win-win, but thanks for replying.

now i must absolutely write that eldritch!könig/civilian!ghost fic! i have so many ideas that i left xeno!könig and his tentacles aside for a while, but after i've dealt with the five different colonel!könig/recruit!dommy mummy!reader and colonel!könig/tmale!base medic, perhaps i'll have some time to figure it out!

oh! don't even say it! today i was all excited about a fanart idea i had while at work, then i was confronted with the reality of actually drawing it... what an ice cold shower!!!

i'll get back to it as soon as i get over the trauma! but good luck with your studies, you're already ahead!

pretty pixel vessels!!! i am also very nitpicky. in fact, i've noticed, the more concrete an idea i develop of könig, the less open i am to changing interpretation (even though i still like reading others'!)

the only thing i am glad about entering the fandom when i did is that i initially conceinved this blog as a magnus archives fanblog. if it started as a könig simp blog, i would probably have called myself something like... königsheftyballs or something and i'm so grateful that didn't happen. im' much happier as a jaredhopworthsknickers!

and yes, smutty ghost fanart was my gateway drug.

(i don't know if i remembered linking you the fic in question that sold me over the ghostsoap ship, but it was this one.)

for the audio, it's easy. here's the link and happy listening! (very nsfw, very explicit). it's one hundred percent out of my headcanons: no, könig the forty-plus-year-old colonel is not simon 'ghost' riley who got his mask at a hot topic or halloween costume shop's little bitch.

time to pull ranks on that one!

(still, enjoyable listening and great voice acting, though!)

true, but them being affiliated with opposing factions opens up interesting scenarios: could either be captured by the other? could that mean the the captured is assigned to the capturer for intel extraction or other expedient? could it be that each finds out that the other is way less sadistic and more compassionate and simply human and matter-of-fact than they initially thought, which changes the mutual way they see each other, while still being wary, because of their curcumstantial enmity?

commonalities? they are both masked, they both have something to hide, something that hurts to this day, the need to create someone who can endure interfacing themselves with the world and its demands while their tender cores still reel and recover, but that they can put aside, when they're alone, to catch breath and regain their whole selves or, the opposite, feel incapable to abandon even when no one is around, as they have become too fragmented.

just throwing ideas around, but there is so much to dig up.

their similarities might draw them to one another: could they have finally found someone who gets it? could they afford to be a little vulnerable, to show a little bit of their soft bellies and hope not to be stabbed from side to side?

but, being enemies who work for different factions with different goals surely would stand in the way: if trusting and opening up is harrowing and dreadful, doing so with an enemy operator can be outright fatal... so much at stake, but what if this were the only chance they have at genuine human connection? a friendship? comfort in wach other's bodies? darethey hope for more? are they delusional? is the imprisonment getting to them?

re: your ooc fanart: and that's brilliant all the same! my latest fanart was nothing but an excuse to put könig in a skimpy little outfit and parade him around! if you like ooc ghost dating your insert, do more of it!!!!!!

i always laugh when someone comes along, thinking themselves smart by pointing out that "well, akshually ghost and könig would never date in canon", because you're in the wrong place, luv. go play the game, write/draw your canon-compliant stuff or only interact with fic and fanartists who are as attached to canon as you, but stop yucking in everyone's yum. it's called fandom, not candom.

i will go on a perilous mission to find all the ghost/könig artists i can and report back, sir! yes, sir!

(by which i mean, i will write you in the inbox or leave the links in the dms, so you'll find them when you have time. no hurry!)

n_n

#jazmeanb #asks #cod #call of duty #könig #konig #könig cod #konig cod #könig mw2 #konig mw2 #könig mwii #konig mwii #könig headcanons #konig headcanons #simon 'ghost' riley #ghost headcanons #ghost/könig

[coelii]

I’m thinking about how far I’ve come from where I was over 2 years ago. Coming out to friends and family, getting my first pair of feminine glasses, being absolutely terrified to be in public alone without the safety net of my wife and son with me to be my support for people staring or confronting me. Being misgendered all the time. All that seems like a distant memory right now. I really like who I’ve become these past few years and specifically these last few months.

I can tell that my wife is drifting a little bit away from me and I from her. I know I’m spending too much time on this app and making new friends. It’s really not all too different from when I would crawl back to WoW or some other time sink investment and would be preoccupied, too preoccupied to give her the attention that she deserves. It makes me feel bad but at the same time I’m feeling really whole lately being able to interact and be friendly with so many great and diverse people. I’m gaining self confidence and feeling less anxious about being me.

I enjoy having people to talk with, I enjoy having people to give advice and a listening ear to. I enjoy doing random acts of kindness to people who don’t get that sort of thing very often. Because quite frankly I’ve led a very fortunate life and had people who love and supported me throughout different stages of my life. Not everyone has that and it’s something I think we all deserve.

I blazed a friend’s post today for no other reason than I thought her and her post deserved a lot more attention than it had gotten. I bought another friend some monster energy though ko-fi a few weeks ago because I knew it would make her happy. I like sending asks or messages to people just to let them know that I was thinking about them because it’s something I know I would like to hear myself.

I plan to keep the random acts of kindness going. I plan to do more of them for my wife to show her how much she means to me. I plan to keep my blog as a place that’s fundamentally kind at its core. I like being unhinged and creative, I like receiving attention and sharing pictures when I feel I look good, and I still like making funny nonsense text posts and memes. But I hope if for some reason you’ve read all this you know that I’m someone who cares very deeply about others and I hope to continually become a better person day after day in all the little ways that matter.

[lonelydadsblog]

Sunday 28th April 2024

Birdshit and boners.

I’ve decided to start giving these blogs titles. It makes more sense to give whoever is reading them to gains bit of insight into what they’re reading.

I’ve now been single for over 3 years now, now aside from the obvious reasons for being single. I’m not very confident. I’m a man with little ability to read the intentions of anyone showing interest in me and this is partly down to a significant hormonal deficiency (testosterone) when I was younger I had to take growth hormones and suffered a massive lack of male desires until my very late teens. I only found this out in the past 12 months. Explaining to me my lack of desires and normal male tendencies & subsequently the desires.

I can be single and ignore my desires, yes I do have them and they do annoy and bother me, a man makes up most mornings with a boner - this is a natural response to toilet desires, and a body response to stop a man pissing the bed, thousands of years of human evolution and I’m left with a painful morning boner every day.

Sorry, this blog has gone on an unhinged tangent but please stay with me. Every morning I wake up to be reminded she’s dead, literal comedy reminder of her death and lack of intimacy and affection is often accompanied by the morning boner. What do I do with these thoughts? I never asked for either of these things and I have no desire to continue receiving them.

A few weeks ago, I moaned about the lack of intimacy and was shown an advert on here. It described a practise of “surrogate therapy”, something I had never heard of before, it’s based on the notion of what is effectively sex for those who have been traumatised by mental or physical issues that prevent them from being intimate with someone else. I found this both horrific and disturbing at first because as I mentioned I’m not exactly the average man, I am very sensitive and believe intimacy and sex belong at the end of love.

I’ve been among conversations with mates who described their one night stands, in fact I have had them and been disgusted with myself, it’s how I found I was something called “Demisexual” This is essentially the inability to have sex without being deeply in love snd emotionally invested with someone, of course I’ve been attracted to women and been intimate with them, but being deeply in love with someone and then being intimate- wow, I’d sacrifice every single person for that pair of intimacy and love, it doesn’t even come close.

So, we find ourselves lonely, missing intimacy and being (unsavoury) targeted by a predatory advert offering a solution to the lack of intimacy, sure - travel, book a hotel have awkward sex either a person who promises to fix this issue and then we go back to the feeling of being alone, only now you’ve got the feeling of a pathetic(?) attempt to alleviating that empty space in your hormones for the sake of your desires, oh - and you’re Demi so you’re very unlikely to feel attached to this person. I’m not able to ever imagine meeting or being in a relationship ever again. I’m still in very, very, in love with her - but I just wish I could remove my desires, I can’t do that with someone I don’t love.

It’s a vicious circle - I am desperate for affection and intimacy but too damaged and sensitive to go after it, if this blog serves as anything it should be that men do think with their pants but also their hearts often get in the way of acting on it.

If I had my way, I’d turn these feelings off, remove these desires from my body and the damage it’s doing to my priorities. I don’t want sex, I don’t want a relationship. I just need my body to understand this and stop tormenting me, sure I’m charge of my and it’s my responsibility to keep these things together- and I am, i just wish I didn’t feel them.

This post feels a bit pathetic today, but I’m proud of my ability to write down how I’m feeling, no matter how shitty it makes me look and feel.

The birdshit in the title? I was walking the dog and a massive loud, wet puddle of seagull(?) shit splattered in front of me.

Maybe my luck is turning.

Lyrics for today’s song are a bit too close to home

You're like a song that never ends

It's like a whisper in my head

I'll never be the same again

#dealing with grief #grief #lonley #lonliness #what the fuck #SoundCloud

[amischiefofmuses]

TAG NINE PEOPLE YOU’D LIKE TO KNOW BETTER!

I. favourite colours: Red, purple or black. Especially when combined together in a gothic style. So specifically deep reds and plum purples, not so much the emo style of bright red and bright purples with black. Think regal vampire's castle.

II. favourite flavours: Barbecue seasonings, char on meat (steak or chicken wings especially), apple sweets, pineapple sweets, watermelon in any form and a nice warm spiced rum.

III. favourite genres: Fantasy and sci-fi that have deep world-building elements, found family stories in whatever form they take, horror, psychology and if any of these come with a touch of comedy then even better but I rarely enjoy pure comedy driven narratives.

IV. favourite music: I'm a bit polyjamorous, listening to whatever vibes with me at any given time but recently I've been listening to a lot of alt, folk, rock and indie. Think Will Wood and The Tapeworms, Neil Cicierega/Lemon Demon, Ashnikko - if it sounds a little unhinged then it probably scratches my brain just right.

V. favourite movies: Spirited Away, Van Helsing, Brothers Grimm, Dragonheart, Borrowers, Pans Labyrinth, Wolf Children, The Lost Boys, Tremors, Hellboy/Hellboy 2 - Fun fact, Hellboy 2 had a big influence on the writing of my Fae characters and their worldbuilding.

VI. favourite series: Adventure Time, Steven Universe, Helluva Boss, X-Files, 10th Kingdom, Stranger Things, The Owl House, Invader Zim, BBC Sherlock, NBC Hannibal and Charmed.

VII. last song: I only smoke to feel bad - KiNG MALA

VIII. last series: Probably Helluva Boss? If not, a rewatch of Invader Zim.

IX. last movie: Coraline! I'd actually never seen it before and watched it with friends (I was ashamed for years to admit I'd never seen it because most people assumed I must have given my vibes.) Was pleasantly surprised to see it also fit my usual love of Fae-themed things.

X. currently reading: Unfortunately nothing currently, my books are all in storage and I don't want to risk losing any while sofa-surfing. I was in the middle of re-reading Fynoderee by Alexander Caine Duncan before that though as I hadn't read it since I was a teenager.

XI. currently watching: Various youtube videos on unexplained mysteries. Mr. Ballen being a favourite.

XII. currently working on: Getting a place to live! Finally got the paperwork I've been missing today (and signed up to the local library!) so that's in progress. Other than that, roleplay replies and trying to make my blog easier to navigate.

tagged by: @handgiven tagging: @bdkrp @multianime @etherdwellers @universalextortion @woewept @bcund @hostilis @hannah-the-small & anyone else that wants to do it!! This is an open invitation!

#Monochrome Feathers || Mun #ooc || the birb speaks #I feel like I'm a fairly simple creature ahaha but nothing wrong with that

[fyodorsmistress]

Hi my favorite little kinky twinky, I'm back again because I have my headcanons, I'm currently writing this instead of analyzing the cultural impact gothic writing, has on our modern literature today. Because ya know unhinged headcanons about a fictional war criminal is so much important than my grades <3

*Fyodor likes to take cold showers, even though he complains about always being cold??

*Fyodor accidentally set his hat on fire...several times (lmao)

Fyodor hates the color beige like so much that he tour up every single beige item of clothing at a store once. (he got away with it.)

Fyodor is allergic to chestnuts

Fyodor didn't know what the omega versus was and asked Dazai randomly what it was, Dazai didn't explain it to him, but he bought a shirt for Fyodor off of Etsy that reads "I'm daddy's omega" He still doesn't understand the reference and wears the shirt.

Fyodor got harassed by Ranpo online for like WEEKS. Neither one of them knew who the other was

Fyodor listened to Mistki one time and hasn't fully recovered since

Fyodor hates whole grain bread

Fyodor wears mismatching socks because he likes to stress Ivan out because he's not "dressed properly"

Fyodor accidentally made mustard gas when he was cleaning his bathroom. (it actually does happen, don't mix chemicals.)

Fyodor thought Atsushi was like 13 for the longest time and still thinks people are lying when they say he's actually 19

Fyodor crashed a random couple's wedding and ended up Djing for them??

Fyodor thought Kenji was homeless and bought him food because he felt just the tiniest bit bad. Kenji is not homeless and just gave him free food LMAO

Fyodor can do long division but if you ask him to do it he's going to literally jump out of a window, he finds it annoying.

DAZAI HC

Dazai accidentally got so drunk he went missing for a whole week and was in Belgium working as a baker.

Dazai did cocaine by accident and ended up having to sign an NDA with the Chinese Government.

Dazai is a certified pre-school teacher

Dazai has hijacked a truck that was caring bandages and stole like a year's supplies worth.

Dazai hates the color purple with a passion, like if he didn't know how to shut up now, he will be ranting for HOURS about the goddamn color.

Dazai actually did try to kill Mori by poisoning his coffee, but Dazai didn't read the label and he gave Mori probiotics.

Dazai met the Queen of England and is now not allowed to Step foot in any territories of the UK.

Dazai has one of the highest scores in pokemon and brags about it to ranpo.

Ranpo gifted Dazai alcohol for his birthday and Dazai still hasn't drank it because he's sentimental like that

Dazai can barely cook himself food so Atsushi often comes over and makes food for Dazai.

Dazai doesn't know how to tie his shoe without the bunny-ear technique, like its the only way he knows how.

Sincerely your one and only NDA with china

-🪱

posting this so i can rb on my REAL blog😌

[henriettalamb]

A (long) explanation to why I restarted the series

I’ve had a fair share of comments asking why I made the decision to restart the comic series (and for those who don’t know, there was a previous run of the series in 2014 to 2017) and I realize people were very attached to this old version- but there is a simple reason to why I rebooted it: I had to.

In what can be a cautionary tale for young & aspiring creators: I was a teenager and a total novice when I first started the series (it was an ask blog before i switched to full pages!) and I had no real roadmap or plan for where the series would go, and this started to manifest in ways that caused problems for me: not knowing how characters would act, not knowing proper panel placement, and essentially coming up with stuff on the spot, it was not sustainable from a creator standpoint in the long term.

But the other, more real reason to why I restarted it all is because the world changed. And I changed too.

The unfettered and bubbly & silly optimism that I had in those years were no more- starting in 2016 the world was in an increasingly new, dangerous place ranging from unhinged, ultra-nationalist fascism rising in my country and around the world, that hate manifesting into acts of violence against numerous oppressed communities- including my own, and the environment of the world started to get more violent and its future bleak.

And while this sort of hatred rose in many areas of society, I was realizing I was transgender and needed help getting to a place where I wanted to be. With the increasing apparent bleakness of the world compounding any mental issues I already had, I lost the drive to continue moving forward with art and even parts of my life.

When my former outlook of hope ended abruptly, the type of style and humor i put into the old-run of the comic felt utterly alien to what I became, what I was feeling, and I had no clue to how to continue it in a way that was not awkward. Thankfully, I got new meds, I transitioned, I moved out and got a good change of pace- and I finally had a clear outline of what I wanted this series to be and how I wanted it to go, and conclude. And the only way I could do that was start it again, on my own terms, older & a little bit wiser, and (while not perfect) my writing and art skills leaped miles above what I was originally making years prior. It’s a work that I make because I want to keep the reasons for moving forward alive and well, and putting that into my work- clinging on numerous reasons to live is not just something *I* need, but *everyone* needs right now... and the past self of me as a teenager who paid no attention to the world, assumed things would magically get better on their own- all without any self-growth, could not provide that type of narrative in a world that is intrinsically challenging and now radically different.

Yet, the old comic is still precious to me, and an important stepping-stone to how I am today- it’s of its own time and I just simply don’t want to change that, it’s almost nostalgic and comforting how that old comic’s aura is just of me, feeling more safe than I ever do now. I wouldn’t rid of that work in a million years. And yet, even as the new comic has its tense turns as the world does- I still want to infuse the newfound and very real love that deserves to be felt and spread in these troubling times- showing that amidst everything, there’s still someone- no, *people* who will love and care for you, and will keep you moving forward and support you up even if the world crumbles around you- and ultimately, you can even help do the same for them.

That’s Henrietta’s story! An outcast, in a new world in front of her with new and familiar challenges, even constantly dealing with inner demons, she can have new people in her life that can give her a reason to live. It’s an increasingly important aspect for me that I don’t think I could ever grasp back then.

So, stay safe, be good to one another, and all the while I’m going to give my all for you, and hopefully the story, world, and characters resonate to you the same way they do for me. <3

#mod post

[dualityvn]

i am giving myself a brain break from my other obligations by writing you another unhinged theory post. (and because i miss sending you these wait who said that) enjoy <3

ight so, i was close last time and my main points then were [redacted] and [redacted] (bc i don't know if this is gonna be closer or not so i dunno if ur gonna post it) since one of those points has been all but confirmed due to recent ask answers and you not posting my theory, im gonna skip right over top of it. ( i am trying to be vague you'll get the picture)

So instead were gonna talk about the part im pretty sure i got wrong, or at least not close, which is where Tenebris/ maybe Keith? still up in the air on if Keith is aware when he's not in direct control, go when not physically present in the world. Due to being able to give ask answers more weight now i do think Tenebris is at least visible to most other people. It could be that as they've both grown, Tenebris has become able to hide his presence a little bit better, resulting in Keith being able to have negative relationships with his exs because why else would anyone think to hurt the poor flower boy when he has a literal monster standing behind him. unless they were just stupid, which is a very real possibility because of the aforementioned being mean to the sweet and adorable Keith. Tenebris' general existence provides some reasoning behind Keiths' parents actions, once again not excusing them because they suck and i hate them, but in one of the asks you said that their relationship with Keith would probably have at least been better if they had only had Keith alone, they didn't want Tenebris too. (which once again sucks i get that its not the ideal situation to have some sort of violent 'monster' living a very attached life with your son but maybe if you had treated them both with human decency and they wouldn't be such 'monsters' huh? bet you didn't think about that did you. god i hate them)

Moving on.

Sudden thought that was Not planned for this, but what if the line "he is speaking, speaking for me" from the song means like, Tenebris can see the world when he's not physically present but cant talk, he has to talk through Keith. and Keith is just like, a prisoner in his own body when this happens. oooo that's neat. i had something else planned but that's a cool concept im gonna rock with that.

im fairly certain this isnt going to get posted so hi nightmare how are you. hope ur feeling better, shitty life stuff sucks, but it'll get better i pwomise mwah (that and the heart earlier are platonic btw i wouldn't wanna step on Tads creators toes and get excommunicated from the church of Tad that would be very unradical)

Speaking of Tad since this is just me talking to you now apparently, i saw the outcry for a Tad theory and while I do have Thoughts i don't have anything super concrete yet. Plus notamonsterfucker wanted to work with me on theory stuff sometime and i lov them so we're thinking about Tad Together so it'll be a bit unless your boyfriend wants to feed us some more crumbs. Thatd be pretty cool, but no pressure obviously. This isn't a Tad blog and i as much as i enjoy Tad, i enjoy Keith and Tenebris more so keep making what you wanna make and i will continue to stew on your vagueness.

uuhh not much theory there at the end but yeah. also this received even less than my usual amount of proofreading because it is nearly midnight here and i am Tired so if its is unreadable that is why.

goodnight

I'm gonna show this, cause it still doesn't mention their explicit situation. Last one had something that was spot on, hehe. But yeah, you're doing good, but some things are still not quite there yet

And hello, I'm doing better today, thank you for asking :D

I'm glad you guys are bonding over Tad lore, lmao. I know my bf is cooking something, cause that ending to the restaurant ad had a sus end. Or maybe he has no idea what he's doing, who knows? He's definitely enjoying the attention Tad is getting though.

#duality game #yandere #dating sim #duality theory

[balfiere]

3, 4 5, 27, 40, 50: Your favourite gifset you've ever made.

3. do you leave the window open at night?

most of the year i do, i only close it when it's raining, it's hot enough for me to have the AC on (>85F/30C) or colder than like 40F/5C at night

4. which cryptid being do you believe in?

*knowing my ass is about to get thrown off this site* none of them, im sorry yall 😭

5. what color are your eyes?

i've always called them hazel or green-hazel, they have a brown inner ring/central heterochromia with a greenish outer ring. the green is pretty desaturated tho, most people think i have light brown eyes unless we're close or i'm wearing red lipstick (shout out to one of my best friends who didn't realize half of my eyes were green for 10 YEARS)

27. about how many hours of sleep did you get?

last night i slept for about 9 hours, most days it's usually like 7-8

40. did you have any snacks today?

this morning i had a little bit of sticky rice with cashews and chocolate chips with my morning coffee and i just ate a box of vegan chicken tenders with thai tea (okay kind of big for a snack... to me it's still a snack tho <3)

50. can i tag you in random stuff?

of course, the more unhinged the better 😌

Your favourite gifset you've ever made.

my pinned post daigo gifset is definitely my fav (hence its pinned status. also i need all visitors to my blog to know im a daigo fucker before im anything else 💞) but im also fond of this noctis set and this majima set

ask game

#melissa replies #sir-yeehaw-paws #thanks for the ask! 🥰

[beautifulpersonpeach]

BPP, hi!

I was wondering if you ever talked about JK? He fascinates me so much with his mannerisms, anxiety, love for make up and a really masculine energy? I remember during winter package shoot Namjoon said that he looked like someone from the movie (a reaper?) Sorry I don't remember, but that someone was not a man and not a woman. It just stuck in my head.

**

Hi Anon,

Yup I think I had at least two long-form asks and posts solely about Jung Kook on the old blog. I can find them to repost if you like. But since we're already talking about him right now, please allow me some minutes to tell you a short story about how I was wrecked by Jungkook's legs.

Jungkook has the best legs in BTS.

*

Once upon a time and not too long ago, in a far away land while streaming More on Youtube, I was watching some BTS dance practices as filler videos. It had been a long while since I'd watched any. And was I prepared? No.

But I was handling it.

Chill, even.

U.n.b.o.t.h.e.r.e.d.

Lol.

Then I watched Best of Me dance practice, and saw, what has to be for the first time, Jung Kook's legs.

Have you seen his legs?

That's not a rhetorical question. Have you?

Because y'all, I saw his legs. And was wrecked.

Completely.

The entire sequence from 0:33 to the end had me in a fucking chokehold.

Like the way I'm writing about Jungkook now is the way I'd write about the rapline. I sound downright vulgar talking about Yoongi I'm not even joking. And a little unhinged. And I think by now I seem a bit woo talking about Jeon Jung Kook.

Let us look at his legs.

Brace yourself.

*

*

*

(cute kookie break cause I need a minute)

*

*

(A little jikook... please don't ask how I have this picture saved in my gallery)

*

*

*

*

Anon, you were talking about "masculine... not a man not a woman"? You get all that here.

We can talk later about how good he is as a vocalist and about his very charming personality, but all I'd like to focus on today for JK is his legs.

#jung kook #jungkook only #ask #bts jungkook #jungkook #jeon jungkook #bangtan