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#(it's more of a record of my viewing experience than anything else)
overgrownmoon · 3 days
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finished up a lineup of my rainworld local group!! im still brainstorming their story, i'd like to explore how they react to the great ascension and how their relationships develop during the span of the game timeline. im thinking their group will be called something to do with gold because of the gold accents ive given them all. maybe something like the "threads of gold" local group?
ill talk about each one individually below cut
from left to right:
a fleeting moment, or "momo" for short, is the most outgoing and excitable of the group. she tries to be the optimist and keep everyone else in the group in good spirits. momo craves freedom; more than anything else, she wants to leave her can and explore the world with her puppet. she has a collection of art and collectibles stowed away in her chamber, gifted to her by scavengers that live around her can. shes fond of the scavengers and envies their freedom to explore and create. she was once in charge of international communications with the group and loves to swap stories about the different cultures of the citizens that used to live on them. of the whole group, momo still holds onto hope that there is a better way to live, and strives to stay positive and hide her fears under a facade of inspiring hope.
whispering reeds, or just reeds for short, hates her own existence. raised by her creator to follow their ideals of eco-extremism, she believes the creation of the iterators has made permanent scars on the world and that all of the planet would be better off if they were all gone. she spends her time split between trying to reverse-engineer the generations of genetic modification out of the local wildlife, and trying to engineer an organism that can decompose the entirety of her can back into the earth. she has the facilities to do so, since she was once the head of genetic modifications experiments to produce larger, hardier crops and cattle for the growing population of citizens. she could once be described as kind and motherly, but there is a deep layer of manic desperation under the surface as she relentlessly tries to fix the worlds mistakes.
12 endless nights prefers their full name, even though others still call him nights for short. once the god of a prestigious city of high ranking citizens, nights carefully managed all of the incoming and outgoing resources for the group, keeping careful inventory and making sure every shipment got to where it belonged. this need for perfection has soured into a manic need for control and a very nihilistic view on life. he has accepted his fate to wither and crumble into dust one day, and dismisses the great problem as a fools errand. he spends most of his time getting into debates and writing grand manifestos on the futility of continuing to live. he believes himself enlightened because of his views, thinking others who hold onto hope fools. as you'd expect, hes a stuck up prick and not very pleasant to be around; only a few know that he was once known to be a fiercely loyal, dependable friend.
silence between words, nicknamed sigil if you'd like, is the groups senior and part of the eldest generations of iterators. his can is located out on the ocean and is home to the greatest library of knowledge in the region. he spent generations cataloguing and documenting every scrap of information he could, every important event in history and every book or poem written, all saved within his library. now, he laments the great loss of history he cannot record due to the great ascension and failing communications. now, his driving goal is to continue to document the fall of the world as he knows it, hoping that maybe someday a new society will find his work and not everything will be forever lost to time. after living and knowing so much for so long, sigil is patient and wise, and very, very tired.
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keepyourpantsongohan · 4 months
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Ayesha Liveblogs Attack on Titan S4
Heading into the next season b4 I can think too much about it
Who are any of these soldiers? What an abrupt change in narration, considering Armin has done every intro until now
“Wasn’t I just flying around with a couple of swords in my hands? And there were Titans too.” That is also what I’m wondering, Falco 
“The successor to the Armoured Titan.” PARDON?? ALSO DOES REINER HAVE A BEARD NOW??? THAT’S NEW
So wait, if the loss of Bertholdt and Annie’s Titans are what caused the war, does that mean this war has been going for a year, since the battle of Shiganshina? Or has more time elapsed that I’m not aware of
“This war has dragged on for four years now.” I guess that answers my earlier question, assuming my premise was true
I must once again offer a hearty ‘Military bad’ to all of this:
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“Look, Colt, you’re the chosen successor of the Beast Titan.” How do ur Titan soldiers feel exactly when u tell them u’ve chosen who’s gonna eat ‘em
"Honestly, you might never find a warrior candidate who is as talented as me.” What I would give for Gabi’s level of unwavering self-confidence 
“I don’t shoot kids,” said an adult, for the first time ever in the history of this show
Honestly, the context that Reiner, Annie and Bertholdt knew about the outside world and then still chose to make things worse for the people already living in Titan Hell Island just makes them harder to understand
[Zeke yells out of a blimp] [Dozens of parachuting Titans are created mid-air] So the Beast Titan ability is just to fucking??? Yell people into Titans??? ZEKE WHAT ON EARTH
This does explain where all of those Titan ppl were coming from in Shiganshina tho
“I’m sick and tired of all these walls.” Is that why you kept destroying them, Reiner?????? 
As a sidenote, now that there are visibly brown people on screen: The ONLY action anime that hasn’t made me feel weird about their brown-skinned characters is Bleach; granted I haven’t watched that many shows, but the depiction in AOT is about as yikes as I expected 
[ATLA voice] “Did Reiner just die?” “You know, it was really unclear.”
“My father, Grisha Jaeger, set something great and terrible in motion on that island, and as his former son, I would like to be the end of it,” said Zeke, like he had nothing to do with anything terrible happening on Paradis and as if he can renounce paternity like a belief system
So it’s not a known factor that Zeke has royal blood? Also why is royal blood so important in this show lmao like isn’t a king just whoever conquered ur country most recently
Ymir confirmed for bury ur gays (poor Historia) but when one female Titan disappears, another one must apparently reappear 
Also weird that there have been a number of Titans who are women but Annie gets to hold the Female Titan title just cause her Titan got tiddies 
Reiner being an older brother figure to these Other Military Kids gives me acid reflux why am I compelled to have stake in someone who has done so many wrongs 
“Surpass Gabi to protect her.” You see, ACID REFLUX
Also nausea-inducing: The transparent H******** analogies!! WHY
We interrupt this griping to notice: IS THAT EREN IN MARLEY WITH THE BLINDFOLD? THAT LOOKS LIKE EREN’S HAIR
Setting other things aside, that they had to have Reiner’s uncle say “Sorry nephew,” as a way to intro the fact that Reiner and Gabi are cousins is funny, bc no one would say that, why not just have Reiner say “Uncle”????
Because they’ve yet to check in at all with what has been going on on the island, it really does feel like a whole different spin-off
Annie’s being able to summon Pure Titans confirmed as a Female Titan ability
“Well, I’m running away as fast as I can,” said Reiner’s father, summing up the attitude of almost every parental figure on this show
Mad relate to Reiner becoming reliable to fulfill a need in the team
Reiner, Annie and Bertholdt don’t look older than 12 in the flashback, why must the core force of these armies always be pubescent 
What even was the point of Annie tracking Kenny? Bc he was Uncle Uri’s BF?
“His legs are saying it’ll snow today, right?” “Yeah, but his torso’s saying clear skies.” Thomas and Connie using Bertholdt’s sleep positions to predict the weather 😭😭😭😭😭 Boys ur friend is a douche
“Thing is, I don’t want this other candidate to be picked.” “Why not? Is this rival of yours a girl by chance?” It’s DEFINITELY Eren, and wow, Eren assuming the only reason u would not want ur friend to be a Titan is bc she’s a girl, quit projecting ur life onto Falco 
How exactly is Eren missing a leg can he STOP himself from regenerating? 
Also whose idea was it for Eren to be at exactly the place that wants to kill him the most kjghkgjh what kinda weirdass plan 
“I’m doing this for you!” “He really just up and said it!” The guards being invested in Gabi and Falco’s potential tween romance 
I really cannot follow the Commander and Willy’s conversations, are they going to overthrow the governments of the world orrrrrr
“My name’s Jaeger, I’m an internment zone physician.” Oh my god, Eren’s meeting his grandpa 
Ah, so Eren’s crazed rambling is hereditary, I guess
“I think I know why [this woman would save me]! She must be an Easterner from Hizuru.” Dshkjdhkfjh u must be East Asian in this Marleyan society in order to acquire empathy
Perplexed by the man in the kaffiyeh holding alcohol but perhaps that’s on me for not interrogating my own preconceived notions
“I got [Reiner] to come!” announced Falco to Eren excitedly, not knowing that he was facilitating a meeting of probably the two least sane people in the world at the moment 
Lmao @ the sudden content warning on episode 64, like should I be newly worried
“What do you plan to do?” “The exact same thing you did. As for why? That’s the same too.” Incredible that all it takes to threaten Reiner is ‘I’m rubber you’re glue’ (also yikes at Eren implying he’s gonna fuck-up one third of Reiner’s country) 
“I feel like I’ve seen you before.” Me too Pieck, I think Shady Helmet is Annie, and I love that for her 
Falco’s lesson of the day: Stranger Danger 
What exactly has Eren been doing the past four years that he now views himself as a villain and Willy feels confident to label him as such in a crowd of the whole world 
“If all that was to save the world, then you didn’t have much choice,” said Eren, even though Reiner definitely did, and Eren definitely does now (military bad!!!)
Eren has defeated Reiner through the power of empathy and 10 years of deep-seated psychological trauma 
“If I escaped while my people died en masse, the world would not rally to our cause.” Willy Tybur really willingly offered himself and a bunch of civilians to die to both smoke out Eren and to start a world war. And Eren really went through it, knowing he would be offering the first blow in the war, and killing a bunch of people of his same heritage! A game of cat and also cat (war crime edition)
“But I’m just as sure that we’re devils ourselves.” Who’s he calling the devils? Him and Tybur? The military? Non-Eldians as a whole? Commander Magath’s vibes are constantly oscillating, what’s his deal
I’m going to guess that the War Hammer Titan is Finé, since she is the only Tybur child to get a name 
Update from 6 minutes later: It’s Auntie War Hammer, actually
The parallels between Udo and Eren trying to lift something off of their loved ones who have been crushed by debris. Sickening 
Is it wrong to be happy that the Scouts are finally showing up? I mean, everyone is clearly on Murder Avenue, but hey, they are the protagonists 
“You’ve killed so many civilians. Innocent people. Kids.“ Not to be pedantic, Mikasa, but he did that in Stohess like five years ago with Annie, that ship has sailed 
Fascinated by everyone’s new looks now that they’ve abandoned most of their morality - not loving the slicked hair and goatee for Jean but Mikasa’s hair is fun 
“Are a bunch of humans... really about to come and kill me?” U can’t put people on Titan Hell Island for 100 years and expect them not to learn how to kill Titans 
“Stay alive; that’s an order.” Levi's steadfast look and personality are a welcome constant
I’m like, pretty convinced Eren is going to die at some point in this season, he seems pretty down and out and Armin ain’t the narrator for nothing 
Oh hey, speaking of Armin, been a while since we’ve seen you, your hair looks nice but I guess you are also Unwell™
Did Levi just detonate a bomb on Zeke’s Titan face while he was still standing on it, what kinda wild tactics
“Did I hesitate because of that kid?” We’ll call it a mild victory that we didn’t have to watch Jean murder a child in cold blood
Wow the scouts have blimps now? They’ve really seen some benefit from travelling across the sea; decades of knowledge in five years
But seriously what the fuck did Eren, Armin and Mikasa DO in the past four years that caused them to look so haunted? I get that they’re fucked up by what they’re doing NOW but it seems like a pre-existing condition
“You have a real kickable face, you know that?” Ah, it seems that Eren did not have permission to go live in a place where people wanted to eat him
“We’ve fought the New Eldian Empire’s first battle, and it ended in Victory.” Guess Titan Hell Island has decided to embrace their title as Eldians? They didn’t even know what that was five years ago jghjgh
“Honestly, I’m just glad that we made it. I know this isn’t fair to the others, but you guys will always be special, to me.” Connie treating being close friends with Sasha and Jean like it’s a betrayal to the military kjhgjkhg
“Mr. Zeke was killed right in front of us.” Oh so Zeke’s like, dead dead?
“You’re one of the good ones.” Again, I want to emphasize how much I hate everything that’s happening right now
YIKES @ Sasha being shot by a child, are they gonna kill Gabi now?
Once again I must be thankful that Jean doesn’t love murder
Whomst the heck is Yelena, I thought we would be seeing an Annie comeback?? RIP
“Quite the performance, coming from a mangy furball.” SO WE’RE WORKING WITH ZEKE NOW? THE HELL IS GOING ON 
“You noticed that trend [of rescuing Eren] and used it against us. Held yourself hostage to force our hand.” Both more manipulative and shrewd than I have come to expect from Eren; growth??????
I suppose we’re going to find out whomst the heck Yelena and Onyankopon are
“I was concerned for Historia’s safety.” Eren what happened to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu three years ago you were all still relatively.... yourselves
“Welcome to our defiled island of filth-blooded devils, you’re gonna to love it here.” Again, thank u to Levi for being who he is
“But as we gradually set aside the labels we have for one another, and worked to see each other as people, we can reach an understanding.” SCOOOOUTS WHAT HAPPENED TO UUUUUUUUUUUU WHERE ARE THE TEENS WHO PLAYED IN THE SEAAAAA
“Thank you for every tasty meal you made for her.” Ahhh Nicolo loved Sasha even despite their different upbringing that’s so sad
“Right, Annie? Say something, please.” Can’t remember if I brought this up when Armin first ate Bertholdt but imo it’s been an underpinning of Armin’s actions throughout the series that he has some deeper feelings for Annie, so it is not lost on me that both vessels of the Colossal Titan have liked Annie
It tickles me every time Hange calls Eren out for his crazed muttering
I can’t believe the pay-off for Mikasa being the only East Asian person on this island is that she’s a lost princess but of course, why not? 
“But I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect match than you.” Okay Historia, I see your subtle flirt with Mikasa, I am not opposed to wlw princess vibes 👀👀👀👀👀👀
“Zeke will pass on the Beast Titan to an individual who has royal blood, and that person must spend the 13 years they’ll have left bearing as many children as possible.” Gross. Also if this so-called royal blood is so important, it really should be Zeke who fucks as many child-bearing people as possible bc someone with functioning testes can typically make waaaaaaaaaaaaay more babies in that time than someone with a uterus 
EUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE THAT HISTORIA IS HAVING A BABY JUST FOR MILITARY PURPOSES; GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh wait, she chose to find a partner and get pregnant in opposition to the military’s timeline? Hmmmm, still hate it 
Hahahaha I guess now we know why everyone’s so much beefier, they were building railroads
“You brats got taller. It’s like you’re sprouting up just to spite me.” Hahaha Levi 
Eren’s friends all going around and offering to be his Titan heir (and, as a result, EAT HIM) is so fucking funny, Jean being too smart, Connie and Sasha being too dumb, Mikasa being too valuable (not to mention the fact she could never eat Eren jkhgkjhg)
“Because you’re important to me. More than anyone ese. I hope... you’ll live long lives.” [Eren’s entire friend group blushes] I too wonder, Jean, what the hell kind of mood they’re trying to set here kjhgkhgkgh
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Jean raises a very fair point about Eren not caring who lives or dies if he’s willing to send his whole friend group into battle 
Tho as a counter to Connie, he of all ppl should recognize laughter as a trauma response 
Like, laughing is exactly what Eren did when Hannes died, and he was definitely mourning then
Also good that we are finally getting some Current Emotional Narrative Focus on the literal PROTAGONISTS 
“All are welcome at the Braus Stables,” I can’t believe Sasha’s parents are taking in the kid who killed their daughter oh nooooooooo
Wow Louise, what an unexpected callback to the evacuation of Trost
“But [the invasion of Marley] was recent, and my mother was killed four whole years ago.” Kaya is also an unexpected callback, but damn, I don’t think u can talk Gabi out of her dedication to generational sin 
Side note: The legacy of Sasha rescuing a child vs the child who murdered her, super fucked up 
“You don’t have to apologize for Marley, you just happened to be born there.” Kaya killing Gabi with kindness
Incredibly pot-kettle for Reiner to have any objection to Zeke defecting lmao he did exactly what you did, dude 
“Well, you are a boy at that age; I bet you’d like to do all kinds of ‘discovering’ with Annie, if you could.” On one hand, Hitch u right, on the other hand, Armin would never get involved-involved with Annie unless it was reciprocated, and on a foot, he’s like 20 now right? Shouldn’t he have a grasp on his hormones by this point hgjhgkjhg
Yelena’s description of Eren’s divine fury is truly filling in the Venn diagram of Death Note and AOT fans huh
“You’re right that there would be no harm in letting us talk to him, so why would [Premier Zachary] forbid it?” My current guess is he’s testing how well Armin and Mikasa will abide by military orders
Well, Armin’s guess is usually better than mine, so I guess it’s Plan E(at Eren)
Did Eren just bisect the Premier?????????? Eren, once again I am asking, what the fuck??????????????
“We believe that whoever delivered the chair must’ve planted a bomb in it.” Oh good, it was not Eren, but it was probably those fanatic scout recruits 
“Armin. The hell is going on right now?” Same, Mikasa, same 
On a more lighthearted note, was the timeskip (aside from being a shorthand for large leap in character motives) mostly to age and beef Eren up, because it would’ve been harder to pull off this Messiah on the Hill moment if Eren were still a skinny fifteen-year-old?
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“But as a result [of adapting to turbulent times] our prestige has been reduced to the point where we’re now derided as a pack of wretched, money-grubbing vixens.” Hey now, Lady Azumabito, what’s wrong with being a money-grubbing vixen
“Armin and I were there when the bomb went off; we almost got killed by the blast.” But whether Eren instigated the assassination or not (I suspect not) seriously I do not fuck with any version of Eren that would let Armin or Mikasa die what happened to the boy who was ready to have an all-out brawl with Levi on the chance Armin could get to live?????
Another mild bit of knowledge I recently had was that Eren would eventually look older and have long hair. In S3 Part II, I was incredibly convinced that that would come as a result of defection based on Armin’s death. And I’m not saying timeskips are always pointless, but they are often used to get around the fact the character you wrote just Wouldn’t Do That
Eughhhhhh they are finally explaining how Zeke has been long-distance Titan transforming, poor Ragako and Connie :(
“And seeing as you murdered every person who lived there, you should learn the name, you bearded shit.” Levi is the only person in this show that gives me any kind of peace
HAHAHAHAHA a moment of recognition for this dialogue (it’s me I’m the ladies - also RIP Petra)
Zeke: Doubt you were well-liked by the ladies. Considering how you think you know what everyone else is feeling.
Levi: I do know. And I was liked enough. So.
Zeke, who has never been liked by a lady, bitterly: Well, good for you!
“Guess that makes us even, you Eldian devil.” 1) The fuck, Nicolo 2) Is that wine poisoned or smth
Update from 7 minutes later: Yes, but also no 
Well I think with Gabi’s murderous monologue there goes the last of whatever sanity Nicolo had left
The Scouts still not wanting harm to come to Gabi despite her killing their friend :(
The way that Mr. Braus is holding that knife against his fingers really looks like he’s about to cut his hand a la the Titan Gang but that would be an abrupt change of scene 
“Way I see it, when it comes to shoulderin’ the sins and hatreds of the past, that burden should fall to adults like you and me.” MR. BRAUS <3
Kaya’s murderous rage about Sasha was entirely expected but still sad
So like...... everyone in the military who drank that wine will become a Titan whenever Zeke wants? HORRIFYING
“What the hell became of the hope we all looked towards?” Oh don’t worry Levi, things are about to get much, much worse 
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“Why would I want that? Always with the killing. It’s like it’s all you ever think about. Just like someone else I know.” Armin said: Gabi, you remind me of my BFF Eren, who also loves murder <3
Eren said: Speak of the devil and he doth appear
Floch has never had a good opinion in his whole damn life, everything he says, I’m like ‘go fuck yourself, Floch’
“And you wouldn’t put us at risk either. You care about us more than anyone!” THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING MIKASA (itslazywriting.jpg)
“Then part of you has become Bertholdt. Within you is an enemy, who has feelings for another enemy.” I think Armin had feelings for Annie pre-eating Bertholdt, but maybe that’s just me 
Eren calling Mikasa, a survivor of human trafficking, a slave, is gross as hell. Eren can go fuck himself too. WHAT HAPPENED TO ‘YOU’RE IMPORTANT TO ME!’ THESE ARE YOUR FRIENDS, MAN!!!!!!!! THE NARRATIVE HAS YET TO GIVE ME A GOOD JUSTIFICATION FOR WHY YOU’RE SUCH A DICK NOW
“The mere sight of you has always made me so damn angry. And now I finally know why. I just couldn’t stand to look at a slave with no mind of her own, who always followed orders without question.” SHUT THE FUCK UP EREN, ARMIN AND MIKASA WERE YOUR FRIENDS FOR YOUR ENTIRE CHILDHOOD, AND YOU LOVED THEM, DUMBASS
“Believe me when I say this, Mikasa. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve hated you.” I will note that Eren and Mikasa’s relationship has always had a weird tone bc Mikasa was exuding a ‘siblings by chance <3 lovers by choice’ energy but Eren, despite not responding to those feelings, LOVED HER AS A FRIEND! WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GUY WHO VOWED TO PROTECT MIKASA AND DISCOVERED HIS COORDINATE POWERS IN AN EFFORT TO PROTECT HER???? WHY ARE WE IGNORING THE PAST THREE SEAAAAAAASONSSS UGH
HONESTLY? GOOD FOR ARMIN, I’D ALSO PUNCH EREN!!!!!
“Is there any wine left?” “Of course not, we’ve been here a month, there’s not a single drop left.“ If Levi becomes a Titan or is killed I will riot. This show is already hot wet garbage, I can’t see it getting any better in the remaining half season
Thank god for Levi, who has done so many wrong things, but has principles, and I love him with my whole dumbass heart 
“I want you to beat up the Commandant here mercilessly until he can’t stand anymore.” Eren and Floch 2022 for the Worst President and Vice President that any nation has ever seen 
Update from two years later: I can’t believe I am STILL watching this stupid fucking show
“Your throw has some serious heat behind it, Zeke!” You’re telling me that Zeke’s entire Titan fighting style and ideology is based on the fact that he’s good at baseball and Ksaver zoned in on his daddy issues
“The truth is, [your parents] never loved you,” said Ksaver to Zeke, in what might be a true statement, but still probably is something you shouldn’t say to a child 
So given his youth respective to Annie & co., Zeke is supposed to be what, max 10 years older than Eren? He’s 30? He’s aged like sour milk 
“Would it be possible for the Founder to make it so that none of us can have children anymore?” What’s the endgame of this eugen!cs plotline 4 real bc it makes me want to throw up
So Zeke’s plan... is to have Eren... enforce eugen!cs by way of mass sterilization????? Why would someone write this story? Why am I still watching this story? I hate it, I hate it so much 
“If the Eldians in this town had never been born, then none of them would have to suffer and die in the plan that you and I are about to carry out,” said Eren, like he and Zeke weren’t 100% responsible for each and every suffering from hereon out 
WHY DO PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE HAVE EREN POSTERS ON THEIR WALLS?? EREN GIVE ME SOME HOPE UR NOT ENTIRELY THE WORST AND YOU’VE GOT SOME OTHER OBJECTIVE OR PLAN IN MIND, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!! 
Me, still trying to finish this show despite the bone arsenic it gives me every episode:
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I still don’t think Levi is dead despite being exploded upon (twice), however he dies (as I’m almost sure he will), he’s gonna go out fighting 
Now that I think about it, I assume he will fight Eren, and I hope he kicks him in the ass
“Assuming that he hasn’t just lost it, I don’t see him [hurting Armin and Mikasa] without having some kind of reason.” Finally, a word of sense. Jean and Levi 2022 for a Government Which Still Probably Sucks, But At Least The Public Can Trust That They Have Some Kind of Sense of the Common Good 
I can’t believe Gabi is STILL holding onto the Good Eldian/Bad Eldian dichotomy in spite of everything she’s seen
“But to think that your cause was so noble. It just touched my heart!” I am assuming Armin’s crocodile tears to Yelena also have some greater plot purpose
Eren said: Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal Pieck 
Turns out, I was wrong. Levi is dead. THANKS FOR NOTHING, AOT
WAIT, HANGE TOOK HIM, I’M HOLDING OUT MINIMAL HOPE
“I saw a girl I didn’t know, sculpting the earth to reform my body.” Queen Ymir, I guess? 
“I don’t trust Marley one bit. Having said that, I trust the comrades who fought at my side completely.” Pieck as the only person in this dumbass military who has some perspective
They really do just breeze past Gabi being chained to Pieck’s severed hand LMAO, where does the cuff go?
Yelena’s learning of Eren’s no. 1 skill: Not listening to anyone
“Who else could talk Marley into doing something so stupid?” Firstly, pot-kettle, Eren, and secondly, yeah, sounds about right. Reiner and Eren remain the most out of their minds of anyone in this whole show
Magath really talking about bringing an end to 2,000 years of hatred like Marley had nothing to do with it 
I’m not sure what the Jaegerists were expecting, their artillery isn’t really designed to fight people one-on-one
“I’d like to hear [Onyankopon] out at least. ‘Kay?” Armin’s kekkei genkai is immeasurable patience. My god
“[...] That the world is more interesting with different kinds of people. I think you believe that. And I think that belief goes against everything Zeke’s doing.” I just don’t understand what the end game is here! Like, what is the point!!!!!!!! What are you trying to say!!!!!!!!! 
“Do you actually believe Eren wants to stop all Eldians from having children? You honestly think he’d go along with that?” NO ARMIN, THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING FOR THE LAST HALF SEASON
All this said: Starting to lose my faith, buddy, seems a little too optimistic at this point
Fnfjnfjfnf Eren’s friends said: I’ll rescue him, but I’m not happy about it
Poor Falco and Nile, hate that that they’re sitting in a dungeon, waiting to be turned into Titans. Zeke, ur the worst
“I’m glad that we’re fighting towards a common goal, now.” Can I just say, I am glad that for once since this season began, the Scouts/104th cadet corps have some sense of agency? Good grief 
Quick question, what in the fuck is wrong with Yelena? What kind of Junji Ito-ass expression did she just make? 
Also, doesn’t bode well for Armin that Yelena agrees with him
If Nile gets shot for trying to help Falco see his brother, I’m gonna scream
“There were never any devils on this island.” FINALLY, GABI!!!!!!!!!! It took like, at least 4 different encounters with kind people (Jean and co., the Braus family, Armin, Nile) for the lesson to stick 
“So yeah, Udo and Zofia are dead ‘cause of me. And also, I’m in love with you.” Being 12-years-old is tough in this economy
Colt really has a lot of information to process about his brother today. Confessing to unintentionally facilitating mass casualty, love, and his imminent death/dehumanization 
“So that’s where my dear little Pieck met her end.” Is it though? No body, no death
Yeah, thought so. Zeke’s never been correct about anything
Does the ep title ‘Two Brothers’ foreshadow both Zeke and Falco dying, as one of half of two brothers? Truly unfortunate for Falco, he’s just a little guy
The real question is if the Scream can also compel Armin, or Annie. They’ve never tried it on Intelligent Titans, I don’t think
Also, Annie was able to Scream Titans to do stuff, back in those woods. She could also be of royal blood?
Also speaking of the whole royal blood thing, if Zeke’s spinal fluid’s ability to turn people into Titans is unique, how were they doing it before Zeke inherited the Beast? Like how did the whole penal colony angle function if Grisha and Dina were turned BEFORE Zeke inherited? Does any Titan spinal fluid work, and if so, why is it so difficult to obtain? Riddle me that
I don’t even have the energy to process how fucked up what just happened was. Nile, Pyxis, and every damn soldier down there getting turned into monsters with no out but death. Falco inadvertently incinerating his brother (for nothing! Porco is going to sacrifice himself anyway!! Colt’s death served NO purpose other than demonstrating his love for his brother)
UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
WHAT
WHAT
WHAT??????????????????????????????????
EREN?????????????? WHAT???????? THE FUCK????????? 
“Those chains around your neck.” “I was starting to wonder if you ever going to say anything about that. Well, even if it took a while, I appreciate your concern.” Zeke said: Don’t worry, we may be in Titan Purgatory, but I have still retained my passive aggressive personality
“Do you seriously believe I’d euthanize the Eldian people?” FUCKING FINALLY EREN! PLEASE TELL ME YOUR PLAN IS TO GET RID OF THE ABILITY TO TRANSFORM INTO TITANS
“I waited to hear your true feelings, and that was the right decision.” This really is the season of sudden but inevitable betrayals
What’s the point of having a Founding Titan or Coordinate at all if you need royal blood to use it? Seems redundant, since it seems like Zeke can more or less control Titans on his own. Is it only the biology thing
“He sacrificed his children on the altar of nationalism.” Absolutely hate to say it, but Zeke, for once in his life, has a point
If the rest of this season could be Baby Eren chasing butterflies, that would be much appreciated. I’d watch 10 hours of that
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“He was a shitty human being who did a shitty job as a father.” I like it that it’s Dumping on Grisha Hours, it’s vaguely cathartic 
Lmao at Eren ‘you’ve undone his brainwashing’ hahaha u could hold ur stupid fucking plan for months or years, but somehow u think this’ll work? Same old impatient guy
“Why did he wait so long [to take the Founding Titan]?” Hahaha Zeke’s finding out the reality that not all siblings are raised equally
“He set aside his mission for the sake of his son. Would’ve been nice if he could’ve done that for me. Good for you, though.” Take a shot every time Zeke is passive aggressive and develop severe liver damage
The one bit of world-building here that doesn’t give me bone arsenic is that people can develop autonomy within these memories, and seem to have some access to the future. It’s interesting
“I came into this world ready for a fight.” Eren said: Murder is my only personality trait 
“I won’t move on if it means abandoning you.” Wild that both Grisha and Zeke decide to put their plans on hold for Eren’s sake, when Eren seems to care so little for it in response 
Eren really does have his dad’s whole face, huh:
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“The power of the Attack Titan offers us brief glimpses into the lives of those yet to inherit it. Meaning, it allows to witness events in the future.” Ohhhhhh so it turns out Paternity-TSD is not just a Titan thing, it is an Attack Titan thing
“Eren will get everything he wants.” I can’t believe that Grisha’s fall from grace comes from EREN being the one to force his hand, through memories alone, to kill the Founding Family. Eren said: Uno reverse, Dad! I AM THE SHITTY FATHER EVERYONE DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT
Imagine, momentarily, being followed around by a grown version of your 9-year-old who incites you to commit violence. No wonder Grisha’s like this
“But even so, I will always love you. If only... I’d let you be my son instead of trying to make you a soldier.” Is this a hurtful or a healing experience for Zeke
So ur tellin’ me Founder Ymir got Titan powers by falling down a well inside of a tree? Okay Grimdark Inuyasha
Pretty fucked up that the royal family got the Founding Titan power through coerced reproduction, but what in this show isn’t fucked up? I’m so tired
If Maria, Rose, and Sina all had kids, I still think Annie could be from the royal blood line. We’ve got Zeke and Historia from two different blood lines, that still leaves one blond to go
Also also also this backstory doesn’t answer the question of how everyone else became a Subject of Ymir. Is everyone from Titan Hell Island her direct descendant? That doesn’t make any sense, because then everyone would be descended from Fritz also. Honestly the thing I suspect (and have suspected, ever since Ragako) is that anyone can be turned into a Titan, not Eldians specifically
Although, this Foundervision makes it seem like all Eldians do specifically have a specific link to Ymir. Is the implication all the people in that society had a little piece of her? Honestly none of the royal bloodline stuff makes any sense if you think about it for more than a few minutes
“The Titans of the Walls will continue their march until every trace of life beyond our shores is trampled flat, and the people of Paradis, are all that remains of humanity.” Eren said: Survival of the craziest
To paraphrase a tumblr post: If you go to the circus for advice, don’t be surprised when it’s delivered to you by a clown
This episode is called Thaw, which means FINALLY Annie. I have been waiting for her to come back to the side of the Scouts!
Honestly, kind of surprised it’s taken Reiner this long to give up LOL
“We’re doing what they feared we’d do, because we have to.” Do you have to, Jean? DO YOU?
“He did this for his friends. Eren wants to protect us, even if it means killing everyone else on the planet.” [B99 VOICE] COOL MOTIVE, STILL MURDER, JEAN 
Well, Connie’s psychological break is much to be expected, I guess
The Braus family and Nicolo automatically protecting Gabi despite how much she’s hurt them personally <3 I love them
“There’s a devil in me, Kaya. And in you, and in everyone else. That’s why our world’s the way it is. There’s a devil inside us all.” I mean, yeah, but I fail to see why you use this framework of oppression metaphors if ur suggesting that everyone is on equal moral standing, because it reeks of ‘there are bad people on both sides’ which like. Then why frame it as slave and subjugator? Why not just frame it as a conflict of nations? They are different metaphors
Armin thanking Pyxis and wishing him rest as he puts him down. Ahhhh oh Armin :( <3 
“You survived.” “Damn, no need to sound so excited about it.” That’s also how I feel about Floch, Jean
“I can’t say for sure, but if Eren could do [a Titan transformation reversal], I think he would’ve done it for our comrades that Zeke turned into Titans, instead of leaving them for us to kill.” Armin still hoping for empathy from Eren despite his plot to kill everyone in the world
Although, this does make a bit of sense as to why Eren also reacted so strongly to Zeke trying to scream. He couldn’t undo what Zeke was about to do
“When he brought the walls down, he did it by breaking all Titan hardening, everywhere.” ANNIEEEEEEEEEEE
Turns out Hitch, Annie’s former roommate and prison guard, is voiced by the same VA as Wendy from Fairy Tail. I knew she sounded familiar LOL
Gjklgglhgkjh @ Annie’s story being ‘your found family can also be garbage’
Annie [Tiktok audio voice]: Traumatize ur parents BACK
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LMAO @ THIS BANTER, GUESS IT’S BEEN ROUGH FOR ANNIE NOT TO BE ABLE TO SAY ANYTHING FOR THE PAST HALF DECADE
Hitch: Okay wait. I don’t need to hear your entire life story.
Annie: I didn’t need to hear about every failed relationship you’ve had in the past four years. It’s not going to kill you to let me talk for a few minutes.
Did Annie’s dad just die???? It remains unclear
Not to state an obvious point but the Jaegerists are so icky. Who has the capacity for a military coup in the middle of a mass casualty event which affected EVERYONE, including them. Fuckhead Floch, that’s who
Also Shadis admitting he’d let the recruits attack him on purpose and advising them to not fight the coup! He really is a good teacher
“There’s no point in worrying about Eren. We can’t stop him, he’s a lost cause!” Armin has finally reached the limit of his near infinite patience
Not Mr. Braus calling Connie a decent sort to Gabi when Connie’s mid-way through a plan to murder her friend
“Be as annoying, selfish and arrogant as you please.” “Well, that’s kinda rude.” Jean truly deserves to be the protagonist of this show
Connie and Armin going to bat who will be the most mentally unwell companion to their traumatized 12-year-old. Based on Armin’s “Levi saving the wrong person” comment, there seems a very real possibility that Armin might offer to let Connie’s mum eat him instead
“He’s just a poor bastard who refuses to die.” LEVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LOVE U, NO BODY NO DEATH
I can’t believe Hange’s explanation for Levi not dying via explosive blast is ‘he’s just built different’
I guess he did lose a couple of fingers but my real question is why have u advanced in all technologies except for prosthetics. Feels like that should be a common need here
Appreciate Levi stating Pieck (Finger) and (Theo) Magath’s full names for exposition lol
“Sasha. Would you have understood what I’m about to do?” Considering all of Sasha’s love towards her siblings and protecting kids, no, probably not, Connie 
DEAR GOD. THE BEST PLAN CONNIE COULD COME UP WITH IS ASKING FALCO TO BRUSH HIS TITAN MUM’S TEETH. HE TRULY IS THE DUMBEST OF THE ALIVE SCOUTS, AND THAT’S INCLUDING EREN
Full disclosure I had to stop watching this episode bc of all the things this show has made me watch, the concept of Connie trying to Hansel and Gretel this 12-year-old child has pushed me to my limits. I’m back now and I’m gonna try my best
PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME WATCH ARMIN DIE AGAIN, I WILL CRY. PLEASEEEEEEEE 
Update from 1 minute later: OH THANK GOD 
“I want to try and become the kind of soldier my mum would be proud of,” said Connie, as the child he’d almost murdered wheezed in the background 
“Guess whatever you’re worried about doesn’t really bother Jean.” Is it weird that I am kind of hoping Mikasa and Jean end up together? There’s something compelling about how they’re both simultaneously so fucked up in slightly opposite ways now
KFJHKFH the comedy of Annie just being sat right beside Armin and Connie as they theorize about her 
“Goodbye. Sincerely, your gloomy roommate.” Me whenever I leave the house
[Mocking] “And I get to live out my life with your sad little gang of xenophobic shitheads?” Onyankopon makes a direct and accurate hit
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I KNEW JEAN WOULDN’T MURDER HIS FRIEND!!! GO SCOUTS!!!!!!!!!
“Don’t you ever brush your teeth [as a Titan]?” “You shouldn’t ask such things, I’m a lady, remember?” LMAO Hange asking the real questions about titan dentistry 
“Then that burning pile of bones would’ve haunted me for the rest of my life.” Jean truly has never stopped being in love with Marco this whole time. Bisexual king 
“Let’s go.” “Go where?” “To end this, and save the world.” Alright, alright, they do know how to refocus my attention:
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The scar on Jean’s dream wife’s cheek showing he still has feelings for Mikasa <3 Ahhh
I appreciate this retrospective on how they coordinated the attack, though it does probably mean the last eps in this part will not advance the narrative that much 
“I’ll do it. Eren’s killed too many already. I won’t sit back and watch him steal more lives.” Good for Mikasa!!!
“You remember Willy Tybur’s speech. What’s the world gonna do when we prove him right?” Jean reasonably points out that Eren has essentially guaranteed the destruction of either civilization (Paradis v. the Outside World)
I continue to be surprised about how explicit Armin and Hange have been about the fact Eren is committing geno-[GUNSHOT NOISE]
I know it was established last episode that this was still about Marco for Jean but it’s brought into sharper relief when they have a mise en scene dedicated to every single person they’ve lost, and then Marco gets his own panel. Everything always returns to unresolved trauma and transparent metaphors for bisexuality: 
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“Hange. In the end, I’ll always be a Scout.” Jean said: I will prevent our friend from committing crimes against humanity, but I’m not like, happy about it 
“Compared to the sum of the carnage and misery wrought by Eldia, your island’s suffering is a joke.” I know Magath is probably trying to test their conviction in standing against Eren, but what a dick thing to say to the people whose lives and homes you have been actively destroying for ten years
Also Magath being a poster child for propaganda efficacy
“If we’re going to be at each other’s throats, let’s stick to arguing about stuff we’ve lived through ourselves.” That’s what I’m saying, Hange
God. Mikasa and Armin STILL wanting to get through to Eren to convince him to stop the Rumbling AFTER everything that’s happened. The residual loyalty Eren has proved himself beyond reciprocating 
“We shouldn’t be fighting,” said Annie, right after provoking Mikasa to fight
Are we finally going to see the fucking point of Yelena as a character? Being from Marley makes sense for her, but honestly I feel like all she’s done is be like, Non-Island Floch (inciting violence and planning insurrection in her group of volunteers/Jaegerists), and we don’t really need two of those, do we?
“Who wouldn’t want to imagine themselves as the saviour of hundreds of millions of innocent lives? To wash the bitterness of hatred out of their mouths with the honeyed taste of righteousness. From where I sit, it seems like that’s what all of you are doing right now.” Yelena said: Actually, you guys are stopping the wholesale slaughter of all other people on earth for selfish reasons 
How the fuck do any of these guys trust drinking alcohol after what happened with Zeke??????????? JEAN YOU WORRY ME
Kind of glad the Scouts got an explanation from Reiner and Annie for how Marco died? At least they get some closure 
“We all just started fighting, and assumed it had to be to the death.” Well. In more direct terms, Reiner, Bertholdt and Annie did actually try to kill you all, Jean, but I see what you’re saying about non-lethal force being an option in your lives 
“Don’t forgive me. I’m truly worthless.” Bold of you to assume anyone was gonna forgive you, Reiner? LOL
Yeah, Jean beating him up is a very fair response 
“Gabi. I’m sorry about kicking you. You okay?” “I’m tougher than I might look, I’m fine.” “I’m glad. Reiner, you’re not getting an apology.” Hahahaha love every bit of this for Jean <3
The way the ep preview is a pic which looks like it’s promoting Armin and Connie’s buddy comedy film, Unhinged and Unhinged-er
I’m glad the Scouts still advocate for non-lethal force, however idealistic
“For now, just stay out of it.” Annie and Reiner said: Our bad for destroying your homeland <3 We will kill your friends so you don’t have to; that’s teamwork! 
“Forgive me. All of you. I was... a fool. I’m sorry for my behaviour last night. We were never in the right. I deluded myself into thinking we were the good guys. I wanted to believe the evil I’d done was justified as part of some great cause.” What an absolutely rapid as hell turn-around for Magath, choking out Yelena one (1) time and hearing Gabi and Falco plead for help caused him to self-reflect? Or more likely it’s a Erwin-esque Inspire-to-Death speech
“There’s no way to avoid spilling more blood today. So please, look the other way.” “I’m not doing that. I refuse to let someone else stain their hands in my place.” Armin said: We can murder our OWN friends, thank you very much, Magath
“You won’t make your world any less violent by making it smaller.” Lady Azumabito having some of the realest dialogue of any character
“In any world, it’s important to understand our place [...] This [island] is the world now. You need to recognize your place in it.” Floch said: Have you heard of racism? I have reinvented it 
You see? This is why we don’t need two Flochs. One is already too much
Floch has never said anything worthwhile in his whole damn life. Get got Floch. I don’t have a lot of faith in Armin’s plan, but if Floch dies, that’s probably a win for everyone 
Fully didn’t realize Daz, Scout who loved to cry about how he was going to die, was still alive. I imagine not for long
Update from 8 mins later: RIP Daz and Samuel 
“We’re with you. Eren has to finish the job or this island is doomed.” Armin. This is the best plan your huge brain could come up with? Connie has rubbed off on you in a bad way 
It’s a good thing being shot through the face cannot kill Armin atm
Better to have tried and failed at a non-violent solution, I guess
There go the last crumbling threads of Connie and Armin’s mental health
How did Floch NOT die at point blank range of two Titans transforming? Proximity to one transformation was enough to kill Colt! Unbelievable
Well, he got his about 15 minutes later, so there we go
This entire season is just a glorified trolley problem, huh? 
“Violence will always be part of human existence. Won’t it, Captain?” Levi looks exhausted. Me too, man
Falco has really handled being in charge of one of the world’s only nine sentient biological weapons as best he could for being 12. He’s trying his best to help
SHADIS!!!!!!! I was curious who took out the reinforcement train
“Last chance for you to take a swim.” “No. I’ll stay. I’ve been looking for a good end to this life.” Shadis said: I must die in the most dramatic way possible
“It’s far too late, but I’ve finally realized how happy I would’ve been if those kids could’ve led normal lives.” Magath is the only adult in this show ever to admit that having child soldiers is bad LMAO:
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I’ll hand it to Shadis and Magath, that was a pretty cool way to die
Though Magath’s comment about Shadis being remembered as a hero doesn’t make a lot of sense, considering he was about to explode any and all witnesses to Shadis being there 
Annie taking the inevitable loss of Liberio the hardest (unsurprising as everyone else there has lived through the hell of the past four years, while Annie was quite literally frozen in time, regardless of physical aging)
“I don’t want to fight anymore. Not with any of you. Not even with Eren.” Oh, Annie
“It could be that he’s always been like this inside. But if this is the real Eren Jaeger, what did I see in him, that made me keep him so close?” A question we’ve all perhaps been wondering, Mikasa 
“They’ll try to feed the car carrots if they manage to catch it.” “Hahah, give them more credit than tha—Wait, are they buying carrots?” I appreciate that we get this reprieve after all of the violence
Also I haven’t said much about Onyankopon because he’s normal and nice, but I do enjoy him 
“Well, look at that another enemy immigrant.” To be clear, this show DOES feel like it’s hate-criming me but it seems redundant to discuss that when they’re in the middle of a [LOUD FORGORN NOISE]
LMAO @ Levi being the one to cause the scene after his snark
“You’ve come to make it known that the people of Paradis wish to coexist in peace?” Well, that plan didn’t go very well, it seems
“Mikasa, what am I to you?” Eren said: It is time to talk about the unspoken crush you’ve had on me for 9 years, Mikasa
Hahaha good for the 104th cadets, getting to party and let loose with one another like actual teens for once. Also the way that Mikasa, Eren, Armin and Jean are laid out in the centre does pull at my heartstrings:
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“What If I’d given him a different answer? Would we still be in this situation right now?” Mikasa, I don’t think romance would’ve fixed Eren
Eren would literally rather kill everyone on the planet than make Historia become a Titan and have children for the military’s sake. Chivalry is not dead I guess, unlike everyone else on the planet
I can’t believe Eren floated this plan by Historia!! Replacing one burden with an even heavier burden 
“There are straightforward explanations for all the behaviours you’re describing, that have nothing to do with genetics or conditioning. [Mikasa] doesn’t slaughter Titans out of some inborn compulsion to keep you alive. She does it because she adores you.” LOL @ Zeke having to be the one who explains this to Eren. The closest he ever comes to actually being a big brother
Now that I’m thinking about it: Where the hell is Zeke? He seems nigh unkillable, are we saying that Eren’s transformation did him in? No body, no death
“That’s what I need. For them to live long and happy lives.” 1) Did you really think, knowing your friends, that any of them would be happy with you killing everyone? 2) Armin is on a timeline just like you, so if we have to take the 13-years-since-Titan-inheritance to live at face value (Idk that I do. I do think it’s something they could lie about), he’s also got less than ten years to live and 3) Doing cruel things out of love does not make them any less cruel!!
Can I just say a big fuckin hoo boy to Eren’s whole life 
Their vaguely-brown accents have gotten a lot worse since that first battle with Marley LMAO. 3/10, hire a brown person 
“I imagine, we learn that our wish isn’t possible. We never find a way to save Paradis.” My name’s Eren Jaeger and I was born with the gift of self-fulfilling prophecy
This genuinely is sickening to watch. What’s the fucking point 
Of course Eren is killing his and Zeke’s grandparents. Why not?
“It’s weird how at ease I feel,” said Armin to Annie, as if it were not kind of a dick thing to say whilst her hometown was being trampled
“What I wanted was to see you.” Armin said: It’s time to talk about MY unspoken crush I’ve had on Annie for the past 4 and a half years!!
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“Good is just what people call people who help them.” Armin really dropping some of his most compelling moral philosophy mid-confession
“So when did this start?” “When did what start?” It is SOOOOO funny that they’re choosing to address the romance angle between Annie and Armin NOW, when the whole fucking world is being brutally, unforgivably murdered. YOU COULDN’T HAVE DONE THIS, LIKE, A COUPLE OF EPISODES AGO
Are Yelena and Pieck the same voice actress because they both have a mild lisp like they’re talking around a retainer
“Even trying to say sorry feels presumptuous.” It is, Reiner! You’re learning something. Perhaps, like 10 years too late, but still!
Annie hugging Reiner goodbye even after acknowledging he’s the one who started all this. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
It’s very kind of Team Save the World to all be so understanding of the fact Annie no longer has any desire to fight
Floch said: I would like to be a problem one last time before I mega-die
“Armin Arlert. As of now I appoint you 15th commander of the Scout Regiment.” Hange said: I volunteer as next for mega-death!!!!
Levi scout-saluting Hange on her heart instead of his.... Ahhhhhhhh
Hange joining all the fallen Scouts in what seems like a very chill afterlife. Good for her
“Killing Zeke should end the Rumbling.” Ah, apparently Zeke is somewhere in his little brother’s Titan body like an extremely fucked up babushka doll. Or a tick
“He died cursing my name. Calling me a traitor, while I told myself I was saving the world. Was it the same? For your team? You, Bertholdt and Annie. Is this what it felt like?” It is also extremely funny that whenever someone does something really terrible to a huge group of people they look at Reiner and go, ‘Is this what it’s like to be you?’ and he goes, ‘Yeah. :(’
It’s also a callback to when he and Bertholdt were Connie’s dads. Shout-out to a less complicated time
“It’s like he wants to find how we’re going to respond to what he’s done.” 
Eren Jaeger 🤝 Itachi Uchiha
Deciding the appropriate judgment for committing a pre-emptive massacre against a huge group of people is having your loved one(s) beat your ass
The fact that Eren’s friends are STILL trying to talk him down. God. It is so much more than he deserves:
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“But from you, I will take nothing.” Except most of the buildings on our island, the Scout leadership’s influence over the government, the fellow recruits I have radicalized for my cause, at least two of our closest friends who died as a direct result of my actions, every friend you made in Liberio, your sense of personal agency over the future, any hope you had for peace, and any remnants of sanity that you have left
“You will only stop my advance when you stop me from breathing. And you are free to try.” Eren said: We interrupt this plane ride for a message from our Founder. Hey besties, please beat me to death!
“They told us back in training that the Female Titan can manifest the abilities of the rest of the nine by taking in parts of their bodies.” OHHHHH so THAT’S why Annie can scream Titans to do stuff. I still think she could be descended from royalty, but this does explain it in part
Hmmm is Zeke’s spinal fluid why Falco had the memory of flying around with swords in his hands? A pre-transformation memory from Zeke? I had wondered if it was from Cadet Ymir 
Turns out Annie’s father is NOT dead, nor are any of the immediate family of the other Marleyan Warriors. Instead, they’re probably going to die very shortly
“We cultivated hate. Nurtured our resentments. Let ourselves believe that could save us. And what came of our failings, we simply dumped onto the ‘Island of Devils.’ This is the result. Those failings gave rise to the monster you see. And it’s marching our hatred back upon us.” General Muller said: Turns out, oppressing people for their ethnic heritage is BAD! Who knew!!!!
All the Marley Eldian parents being like. My bad for inflicting generational trauma onto my children, xoxo
Is Zeke straight up throwing LIGHTNING NOW? Zeke has chidori? What is going ON
“The forces of Paradis are trying to end the Rumbling.” Oh HELL YEAH they are
I’m going to be real honest with you, I am incredibly attached to most of the remaining Team Save the World, so when some or even most of them inevitably die, I will cry. Or be sick. Or both
“Exactly one minute from now, I’ll blast these bones apart.” Armin preparing to kill his best friend to save everyone else. Awful
EREN JUST SWALLOWING HIS BEST FRIEND WHOLE INTO THE FUCKED UP BABUSHKA DOLL WITHOUT HESITATION???? WHAT?????????
“He’s being restrained, but he’s not hurt. The problem, is that he was whisked off towards Eren’s ass.” What a thing to say at a time like this, Levi
“Theses husks are the people who bore the Power of the Nine before us. I don’t know if their minds are still in there or not. But I’m betting the Founding Titan has the ability to resurrect them as many times as it needs to.” Eren said: Hey besties, please fight these Big Fucking Skeleton Ghosts of Your Ancestors and Friends
I suppose the friends part disproportionately affects Reiner, since he was closest to the most former Titans (Marcel, Porco, on top of them all being friends with Bertholdt)
Bertholdt crying in Armin’s Founder Ymir-Induced Suffocation Scape implies the former Titans are CONSCIOUS of being used to hurt their friends and commit gen-[GUNSHOT NOISE]? HATE THAT
“Do you still think we can win?” “Nope. But I don’t care. I wanna fight to the bitter end.” I am in love with you, Jean Kirschtein 
“You’re kinda in the way, Mikasa!” ANNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Colour me bananas, but if Falco (I see why they named his character that now) was so certain he could turn into a Bird Titan, why’d he have to do it ON the boat. Couldn’t HE have been on one of the little lifeboats, transforming in the water and swooping away? 
“Hang on, where’s Arm—I mean, where’s Pieck?” Annie, you’re allowed to care that Armin’s alive, it’s not weird HAHAHAHAH. It’s weirder that you said it that way
“Your childhood friends sure have a way of getting themselves captured,” said Annie, as if she had not been the first person to capture them 
“Damn it. I had a long list of things to tell that dumbass off about.” This is Levi saying how much he loves Eren and doesn’t want to kill him :(
Gjgkgkjgjgjg Annie’s advice to Mikasa about how to deal with their comrades killing the man Mikasa loves: Try not to think about it
“That one. Isn’t it an okapi?” “What the hell’s an okapi?” I too would like to know what an okapi is, Mikasa
“Erwin, I didn’t choose you, and I don’t regret that. I’m entrusting the future with the same look in his eyes as all of you.” I LOVE YOU, LEVI, AND I LOVE YOU ARMIN
The subsequent cut to Armin screaming at his inanimate body about how much he hates it and himself. This show is exhausting
“I should be in a Titan’s mouth right now, so how do I know what’s happening to my friends?” This is a question I also had Armin, but I wasn’t really expecting an answer
“You still seek to multiply? Why? Is continuing the species really that important to you?” Zeke said: Actually, y’all are saving the world because you wanna fuck (Zeke and Yelena fight over who projects a more insane motivation onto the Scouts)
“This strange, lovely thought popped into my head. I felt like maybe I’d been born to race Mikasa and Eren up that hill.” Oh, Armin
Armin seeing this object in the paths as a leaf that reminds him of Mikasa and Eren while Zeke sees it as a baseball him and Ksaver played with. Everything always comes back to baseball and absent fathers
Is the payoff for Armin being Babushka'd for a solid thirty minutes going to be that he’s going to convert all of these Former Titans in Purgatory (aka the Paths) to stop being Eren’s Skeleton Ghost Army? Incredible 
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I was wondering when Cadet Ymir was going to make an appearance. Good for her! 
I also appreciate that Eren’s own (skeleton ghost) father is among the people actively fighting against him. PARENTING 
Zeke, as he gets decapitated, probably: See, I CAN be helpful!
“The rumbling just stopped.” THEN WHYYYY are there 45 more minutes in the episode!!!!!!!!! What are you going to do!!!!!!
I would like an explanation on what the glowing-worm-spine-thing that gives people Titan powers is. An alien? A sea creature? A really vengeful spirit? Explain!!!!
“If [the Titan Worm] survived that explosion point-blank, we can’t kill it. The one we should target is Eren. This nightmare won’t end until we take him down.” To be fair, Levi, you just had Armin try to explode Eren too, so can you really kill him?
“Could this be the same gas they used on Ragako village?” “Mikasa, Pieck, get on Falco, we need to leave. Cause only Ackermanns and Titan wielders are immune, remember?” OH MY GOD THEY’RE GOING TO TURN JEAN AND CONNIE INTO TITANS. I KNEW THIS BATTLE WASN’T GOING TO PASS WITHOUT KILLING SCOUTS, BUT OH MY GOD. JEAN. I AM CRYING, THIS IS THE WORST POSSIBLE WAY HE COULD DIE. THE WAY ALL OF THESE PEOPLE’S FAMILIES COULD DIE. I HATE THIS. I AM SICK. 
“You’re gonna live without me for a long time. So forget you knew me. Forget, and be free.” I don’t care about this Eren-isn’t-a-mass-murderer fantasy sequence. Any remaining energy I had for this narrative died with Jean
Mikasa kissing Eren AFTER decapitating him is an incredibly weird way to end this battle. Why write this show? What was the point?
HKFHKJFHKFJHFKJHF not them having Eren appear as a child and say sorry for the mass murder!!!! What kinda Naruto behaviour is this!!!
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“So you did all that to push us away, huh? To make us turn against you and become the heroes who prevent the annihilation of the human race by killing you.” “You got it. Every human left outside of the walls will owe you a debt of gratitude.” This is the most backwards ass, stupid ass plan I’ve ever heard of. I can’t believe THIS is the excuse for everything I’ve had to witness. 
Eren Jaeger 🤝 Itachi Uchiha
If I do ALLLLLL the murders, no one will think badly of my fellow people, even though I am one of those people
“You’re hoping we can all become like the Tybur family and protect Paradis from reprisal.” Except for Jean and Connie who are mega-dead, and Annie, Armin, Reiner and Pieck, who will presumably all die in less than ten years, Falco who has thirteen years left, which leaves Levi and Mikasa to stand for their whole island? 
“Founder Ymir, she loved King Fritz.” Of course, who doesn’t love someone who murdered their parents, enslaved them, ripped out their tongue and then [redacted] them and had their kids [LOUD HONK OF A CLOWN CAR]
The way they’re cycling through Eren and Armin’s ages. It does hurt me 
“The past and future, it’s all happening at once. And so, I had no choice That day, in that moment, Bertholdt would’ve died, but he had to live, so I sent it away from him and towards mom.” So, not only are you saying that Eren was retroactively controlling Titans from the wall’s breach, but also that HE is responsible for his mum getting eaten? Why does Eren have to be responsible for everything? Can’t things be also Reiner and Bertholdt’s fault?
“You’re a selfish heartbreaker, and I hope she does forget about you because she deserves to be happy!” Sweet of Armin, but I can’t take this seriously inside of everything that’s happened 
INSANE OF ARMIN TO BE MORE MAD ABOUT EREN DISREGARDING MIKASA’S FEELINGS THAN HE IS ABOUT THE GENOC!DE. Armin said: Two can play at the unrelentingly crazy takes on what chivalry means, Eren!
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“But hey, the good news is, I know of one charming young fella she’s pretty close to already.” You mean Jean, whom Eren’s worm ally Titan-murdered??????
[Sobbing] “No. That’d break my heart. I don’t want her to find someone else. I want to be her one and only love! Even she does get over me, I think it should take her ten years at least!” “Oh, I see. Sorry, I didn’t think you’d say something that pathetic.” HAHAHAHAHA I genuinely just can’t absorb Eren saying this dialogue as true, because it feels so stupid and out-of-character, however, Armin’s response is VERY funny
“Twenty-percent of humanity is all that you manage to save. It’s been determined.” “’Been determined?’ But you determined it. You’re the one who kills them!” Eren said: [Count Frollo voice] It’s not my fault, it’s in God’s plan
“I trampled the world because I wanted it.” This is like, the third set of motivations Eren’s played his hand at. When will we land on one that sticks?
“Why? Why did it turn out this way? I finally know. Because I’m an idiot. I’m nothing more than a garden-variety idiot who got his hands on power. That’s why this is the only resolution I can bring about.” I guess this is motivation #4
“You’ll be joining me? Where?” [Pleasantly] “Assuming it exists, in hell.” Armin’s dialogue is so unrivaled in how crazy it is, I almost admire it
“Yeah. Look for me in hell. I’ll be waiting.” “Right. We’ll be together, for all time.” This is the opposite of meet me in gay heaven energy. Meet me in White Boy Hell:
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God. Armin’s scream when he sees Eren is dead. Unbearable
“He said that you would make a choice, and that in the end it would cause the Power of the Titans to be erased from this world.” JEAN AND CONNIE AND GABI ALIVE? ARMIN AND REINER AND ANNIE AND FALCO STAYING ALIVE? ALSO WHY WAS THIS NOT AN OPTION BEFORE? Finally, a reason for all of this. The longest, most chaotic, worst path to a reason, but a reason nonetheless 
Eren being like, surprise!!! Here is my post-mass-murder voicemail about how much I love you all, besties! Except you, Pieck, I don’t know you. And everyone’s just like, ‘Aw, I missed him!’
I was worried for a moment that Levi seeing the fallen Scouts was an indication he was dying, but it seems like it’s some kind of goodbye present from Eren
“My name is Armin Arlert. And I killed Eren Jaeger. I stopped the Attack Titan and ended the rumbling.” Armin said: I am not afraid to take credit for the murder of my best friend
“All this time it was you, peeking into my head.” Mikasa’s headaches are actually Maternity-TSD from Founder Ymir? Sure, why not
I suppose it would be unrealistic if the fraction of people alive DIDN’T want to retaliate against the Island. What else could you expect? 
“But if we must fight, let it be for an end to fighting.” Historia finally gets some agency after her Farm Pregnancy Arc LMAO
“You know, it’s a real shame your life got longer, Reiner.” HAHAHA Jean. This is the kind of bullshit I missed 
HAAHAHAHAHAH ARMIN, I see you and Annie haven’t gotten any better at communicating:
Armin: Don’t forget that we’re Scout Regiment. We’re a bunch of dreamers who don’t know when to quit.
Annie: But I was in the Military Police. 
Armin, ignoring her: Anyway—
“After trying to kill each other again and again, we put down our weapons and began to call for peace.” I suppose this is the most tolerable possible resolution to an incredibly deranged show
I can’t believe this series has beaten me down so hard with its bare fists that I feel like 80% of the world dying is not the worst outcome. That is OBJECTIVELY AWFUL. I guess it helps that there’s no death/fighting scenes for last third of this episode. It’s just been so unbearable that if I’m not crying or actively nauseous, it’s some kind of victory. What a horrible show
Are we suggesting Eren has been reincarnated as a bird? Sure, fitting for a wings-of-freedom Scout metaphor moment, I suppose!
I’m not going to comment on the mid-credits scenes. This show has put me through enough. I have followed it through to its conclusion, and its conclusion was as brutal and absurd as the rest of it. Goodnight! 
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lissomeingenuestuff · 23 days
Text
CLARA BOW // charles leclerc - pt. 3
charles leclerc x figureskater!reader
part 1 part 2 part 4
summary: you're an aspiring olympic gold medalist who just wants to compete and have fun. on the way there, a handsome monegasque f1 driver slides into your dms and changes the trajectory of your life.
note: as always, we are playing fast and furious with the dates. ignore them pls 😝 also, pt. 1 and pt. 2 are both up to over 700 notes 😭 what is this craziness??
olympics
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liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and 43,234 others
olympics Y/N L/N dazzles in her short program, skating to Yiruma's "River Flows in You" on the first official day of the solo figure skating competition in Beijing. As of today, she is third on the leaderboard (the first American to have made it this far since Sasha Cohen in Torino 2006), behind the ROC's Kamila Valieva and Anna Shcherbakova.
view all 218 comments...
lara.j.h go y/n go!
junebug27 she'd be in first if it weren't for Eteri's drugged up girls, but ya'll aren't ready for that conversation yet
anuyshaliva Kamila and Anna deserve to be in first and second. If Y/N wanted a better position, she should've tried harder.
amarantheazalea stfu girl the russians aren't gonna thank you for riding them yk 😒
junebug27 i said what i said. kamila was literally found to have drugs in her system after the team events concluded, and i wouldn't be surprised if anna and sasha were the same. i'm sure the girls are all very talented on their own, but Eteri breaks them. look what happened to evgenia. look what happened to aliona.
barbiegirl44 my mother breaks records wherever she goes, ya'll just wait and see 🥹
sharlleclerc not charles, carlos, lando and danny ric all lurking in the likes 😭
charlesstan4ever so what do we think guys? is she the reason charles was smiling at his phone so often in daniel's post?
itsellieinparis who else could it be?
sophhhhhhhia methinks yes, madam 🫡
kyrapreston istg all of ya'll need to calm down 😒 she hasn't even said anything abt him other than the fact that he's nice
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usfigureskating
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liked by charles_leclerc, cassievilleneuve, and 13,914 others
usfigureskating Y/N L/N becomes the first U.S. lady to win an Olympic medal since Sasha Cohen in 2006! Congrats on the bronze, @y/nl/n!
view all 97 comments...
cassievilleneuve eeeeek that's my bestieee!
y/n l/n thanks guys 😭 this medal means the world to me and i'm honored to bring it back home to you!
livandluke it's just a bronze, i don't see why everyone's so happy about it
lorabelle even "just a bronze" means you're the third best figure skater in the world 😒 considering what y/n was up against (and all the russian shenanigans going on) this season, i'm hugely impressed with her performance. besides, don't forget, she has a gold team medal too; she just hasn't gotten that one yet because they have to investigate the doping scandal first.
charles_leclerc very well deserved! congratulations @y/nl/n!
y/n l/n merci beaucoup, charles 🥹
rowanf1girlie asdjkcjkdf is this fr rn!? someone sedate me 😭
pennyverstappen they're interacting! he's congratulating her! she's responding to him in french! what's happeningggggg
oscarlandoromanempire so are they dating or what?
carlossainz55 congratulations!
y/n l/n gracias!!
kikitifosi not y/n answering the drivers in their native language 🥹 so sweet!!!
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The Olympic Village Beijing, China
Her heart wouldn't stop its erratic thump-thumping. As she got out of the bath, wrapped herself up in a fluffy white towel, and threw herself onto the downy comforter, she couldn't help but try to trace her footsteps back; take deep breaths and try to calm herself down.
It was to no avail; the post-Olympic high was still going strong, and there was nothing Y/N could do to calm it down. She didn't know if she wanted to, even if the rapid breathing was getting annoying. She didn't know if she wanted to forget a moment more of this experience.
It had been such a wild ride, coming to Beijing. Y/N had never expected that something like this would happen to her. She'd never even predicted it in her wildest dreams. This had been something Cassie had always longed for, something Cassie had worked her whole life for, and somehow, the opportunity and the medal had been handed to Y/N. It didn't make sense.
She felt guilty for usurping that chance from her best friend, even if it was for sure that Cassie would make it onto the Olympic team in 2026 (It definitely wasn't for sure, but Y/N had to tell herself something to stymie the overwhelming contrition that flooded her every time she thought of Cassie getting fourth place at Nationals). Furthermore, she felt guilty for being where she was now, with so much less experience than her competitors.
Most people started ice skating at five or six. That was when Y/N had gotten her first pair of skates too, but she'd abandoned the sport until she was sixteen; until Cassie had graduated from the junior division to the senior, and had started seriously competing. Y/N had only started doing it as a joke, as a way to release tension from schoolwork and AP tests, but it had evolved into something else. Slowly, she'd realized that she actually enjoyed it, that skating on ice was akin to floating, or even flying. And then it became her passion, and - eventually - her job.
Y/N was here now, in Beijing. She had an Olympic bronze medal, a team gold medal (if the doping investigations would ever conclude), and a new fanbase who were eager and willing to be influenced by her, which was terrifying, to say the least. She had all of this, along with an F1 driver sliding in her DMs and inviting her to races - she had everything Cassie had ever wanted.
It was all so amazing, so good... But why did it feel so bad?
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tag list: @1655clean, @norwayxo, @thecubanator2
436 notes · View notes
alicanta77 · 6 months
Text
NCT Dream Reaction: Collab with their idol!s/o
Mark:
this would probably be his dream
he is so busy all the time
and he knows his schedule isn't going to calm down anytime soon
so at least this way he can get his work done
and spend time with you as well
and he got even more excited when he found out it was just the two of you and your groups weren't going to be involved
now he gets you all to himself
just him and his favourite girl
would treasure every single second that he gets to be with you and work with you
loves watching you work and just finds you such an inspiration
every now and then just stops for a second and goes
"dang... that's my girl..."
he's just in awe of you 24/7
you truly are a goddess to him
Renjun:
would become a complete and utter cutie patootie
literally melted when he heard that your group was doing a collab with nct dream
like actually shrunk down in his chair and smiled so widely
you got to sing the most beautiful duet together
and the harmonies made hairs rise on his arms everytime he heard you sing them
would definitely plan to sing this song when he finally gets to marry you
this whole experience would just melt renjun right down to his core
would be so so SO excited for the fans to see it too
like he's play it non-stop and enjoy every second of the promo that you two got to do for it
seeing him and you have so much fun brought loads of positive attention from fans as well
and renjun couldn't believe his luck that he got to do this with you by his side
Jeno:
the most supportive boyfriend ever
would just be smiling all the time
like you're doing a darker and twisted concept
but jeno is watching you in the corner like (.◜ ᵕ ◝)
everything you do is like it is the most incredible thing on the planet
definitely finds you taking work seriously incredibly hot
wants to practice the dance as much as possible
and is constantly offering suggestions that would make the two of you be dancing closer to each other
"maybe i should grab her hip here and guide her through the turn"
"jeno you haven't let go of her once this entire routine"
"so?"
would love to hear your input as well and probably thinks your ideas are all brilliant
he just thinks that you're brilliant
Donghyuck:
he would want to be involved in the whole process
from the very first step with writing it all the way through and he wanted you to be just as involved as him
he loves having a project that he can put his whole heart into
and you are his whole heart so working on this with you would be a dream come true
this would definitely be the project he was most proud of
would love that the two of you could be honest with each other about how the project was going
he would listen to you with such attentiveness and would truly value everything you had to say
hyuck holds your opinion to the highest standard
like no one else's opinion matters to him more than yours
so he would take your views on this so seriously
and would make sure you knew your voice was heard
he was always ready to fight your corner
Jaemin:
when he got told your groups were doing a collab together he could barely hold back the grin that stretched out across his face
it became his mission to make this time you had together the best practices of your lives
he would bring in a homemade lunch for the two of you
and managed to turn that half an hour break into a date
he would be cheering obnoxiously loudly from the side of the practice room while you danced
he would bring you water to the recording studio
if there's one thing jaemin will always be it's a romantic
having him around would keep you on top of your health as well
there would be no skipping meals and your vitamins would be taken at exactly the right time
jaemin saw to that
as long as you had him around he would never let anything bad happen to you
Chenle:
oh my god he would have campaigned for this to happen for SO LONG
like i cannot put this into words
essentially for the past year every day chenle would ask to do a collab with you
it got to the point where the company gave him the collab just so that he would shut up
literally will talk about it non stop as well
even to you like he's just bouncing off the walls he's so exicted
the first time he sang your pair ballad with you he nearly cried
though he'd never openly admit it
he wasn't sure why it got to him but he just got so overwhelmed with his love for you
tried his hardest to get it together for your first live broadcast
but you were dressed so beautifully and you sang like an angel an he just couldn't believe that you had chosen him
it was hard not to be emotional when he's gotten blessed with you by his side
and he vowed to spend the rest of his life making you feel as loved as you made him feel
Jisung:
would probably be a bit nervous
like he knows you are an idol as well but you haven't worked together before
he doesn't want conflict to arise from this
but he is also really excited
is hoping for it to be centred around dance
purely just because he wants to impress you
is a little nervous when it's revealed to be vocal and dance because he thinks you're a better vocalist than him
but you make sure he knows he has a beautiful voice to listen to
you are such a point of comfort for jisung
if he's ever feeling down or insecure all he needs is to hold onto you and feel you stroke his hair and it's like everything's okay again
doing this collab with you was such a confidence boost that jisung wasn't expecting
you brought out the best side of him no matter what you were doing
and jisung knew nobody could love the way you two loved each other
767 notes · View notes
heartfullofleeches · 11 months
Note
yes please dear god smile reader is baby
[Very baby. Here's how Yan Scientist and their slime formally met]
"Subject 43? Payment for yesterday's efforts."
"An apple....but you said I could go home."
Feeding day - as if their headache couldn't get any worse. Like common livestock, their possessions squealed and whined about the most senseless things. Pleading for testing to cease; begging to be returned to their families when it was their love ones who sold them to begin with. The scientist would sooner snip out their tongues if it meant a moment of peace, but they were not a tyrant - plus verbal records of their subjects experiences was easier to stomach at night than written. The audio logs had lulled them to sleep better than any pill or liquid could.
"I said it was a possibility - if you did what I asked properly. You may have killed your cellmate, but you did not bring me their eyes. A shame really. I took the time out of my day to prepare your meal by hand. Ah - well, there's someone who will appreciate my efforts more. Tell me, tuna or ham?"
A wet gurgle sounds from the scientist's pocket."
"Both? You greedy devil. I suppose you do deserve something special for putting up with the same pains that I do."
The scientist picks up two sandwiches and smushes them together as the mass in their pocket becomes denser; gooey tendrils slithering up the length of their coat and crawling onto their shoulder as they lift their hand. The blob sucks up the sandwiches into its gelatinous body, wiggling with delight as they're broken down and absorbed into its structure. The scientist pats the gel with one finger causing it to vibrate more violently resulting in a breathy laugh from its owner.
"Alright, we have more subjects to feed. Come on, You - you too."
The scientist snaps their fingers at the Henchman wheeling the cart who closes the cell door as they both exit. The slime creeps down their shirt and through their sleeve as they walk, resting in the scientist's palm. A marvel their little companion was. They wished they had the honor of creating it, but it's origins were a mystery even to them. The scientist found the creature munching away on the undissolved bones of a past test subject. From numerous experiments, the scientist discovered their new lab partner could not only breakdown organic compounds, but most non living object too and had a choice on what it consumed. It made for the perfect little helper to get rid of all the dead bodies and those who oppose them. The best part about the slime was that it had no mouth and therefore the most tolerable member of the team.
The scientist's smile melts as they enter the next cell. The stress that had fled them by the usage of their slime as a stress toy skyrocketed seeing the act of utter betrayal pointed at them. A lackey, standing over a motionless subject - gun raised at their employer. The scientist sighs.
"Please remove your mask."
The Henchman does as told. Figures - there was only one other person the scientist trusted with the codes. They supposed trying to make this a family business was a poor decision.
"Emery - this has got to stop."
A chuckle. "Does it really?"
"You won, just let him go. I know you didn't have the best upbringing, but he still your -"
Emery grits their teeth, squirming the slime so hard it slithers out of their grip. "You don't know shit. If it makes you feel any better, I haven't actually done anything to him - yet. Just locked him down here, with all the others nobody would care to miss. There is no persuading me on this. If you have nothing else to say - do it."
Their Henchman reaches for his gun, Emery rests their hand over his. Through clouded view and reasoning, the figure steadies their gun. They look away, unable to look as they pull the trigger on the once innocent child they knew. Emery doesn't flinch as it fires - a teal web covering the entirety of their chest and dissolving the bullet as soon as it hits. Their attacker looks on in horror, but before they can do anything Emery takes their henchman's gun as their own and fires back, bullet piercing their heart. Emery's head falls, expressionless eyes gazing out at the person left alive - mouthing two words.
"Your fault."
Emery exhales, placing a hand over their chest and gathering the slime into one ball. "One thing after another. Now I have to fire a new head. Eat your meal and return to me when you're done."
They lower the slime to the ground who plops out on the smooth surface - spitting an apple out that rolls at the scientist feet. They pick it up as they walk off, wiping away tears.
-
A picture frame shatters.
"Why would you choose him and not me. Why!?"
The picture holds a smiling, bucktooth child in the arms of their butler as they show off their award for the camera and all to see. The person who taught them everything, the only one there when they had no one. Emery throws an empty bottle at the image, sinking down at the foot of their bed - cradling their arms to their chest.
"why....."
The sound of wet suction weaves into their cries as the slime wrigglies itself beneath the crack in their bedroom door. It inches towards them, shaking violently before spitting up as locket on the floor. Emery goes to grab it, but as they do the smile shoots up their arm and spreads out, and puffs up over their shoulder like a makeshift pillow. Emery cards their fingers their hair, climbing to their feet and pocketing the trinket.
"I guess I do need some rest. Thank you, You. You seem to be the only one I can't trust."
More gurgles.
"I guess I should give you an actual name eventually." They sight - broken body collapsible on their bed and crawling under their blankets with the help of their aid. The slime hops up on their pillow as they raise their head - solidifying as they rest. "Goodnight, You."
That night - Emery had the worse night's rest they ever had in their twenty-seven years of living.
"You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are gray~"
Is someone ... singing?
"You'll never know, dear. How much I love you-"
The voice sounds so familiar....no... There's more than one. It's hard to remember something so sweet - when all those voices ever did was beg you to stop.
"Please don't take - my sunshine away."
Emery shoots up like a lightning bolt. Their hands search the bed for their glasses which had fallen - finding a squishy, but very real feeling hand beneath their grasp. Emery locates their glasses as the body's see through eyelids peel back.
"Goodnight, You!"
Emery screams - rolling out of the bed in a tanglement of their blankets and obscenities. The interior in the bed sits up, puzzled; bubbles floating through their translucent body as their anxiety peaks.
"Emery.....this you?" The figure points, noting the odd number of fingers on its hand as it looks at theirs. "Mmm wrong...."
Emery's eyes widen as the slime's sixth finger merges into the fifth. "Y-you?...."
The slime chirps. "Emery!"
Emery looks strength in their knees. "What? How?..."
"Ahhh.... You - eat meal... gr...ow better at shape. Too much at one time - hard to understand. Able to single out things Emery say - Emery is... the only one I can trust."
Emery clutches their head. "Ngh..."
"Help?" The slime lunges foward, reverting to its natural state as it crashes into the floor and forming back into its humanoid shell as it catches them before they stumble. It was hard to notice with half of them hanging off the bed, but the slime was massive - size their size if they had to estimate. They bury their face into their hands. "This can't be happy.
The smlie's droppy smile falters. "Wrong? Wanted to make you happy. I..will go back if it makes you happy. Sad Emery...makes me sad too."
Emery looks up at the slime. They raise out their hand, stroking the slime's cold cheek. It hums with a full body shutter - leaning into their palm until their fingers poke through the membrane. Emery retracts their hand, sliding it into their now empty pocket.
"It's fine. I guess we really need to pick a name for you now."
"Mm I pick?"
"Do you have something in mind?"
"Y/n!"
"Where'd you pick up that one?"
The slime points to their head. "Memories. I... like it the most out of them."
"I see... Y/n, it's cute. Alright, Y/n - let's go get some breakfast."
The slime spits a small bag from its stomach contents onto its hand, giving the trail mix too them. That's much more alarming when it's coming out a real mouth and tongue.
"Breakfast!"
Emery takes it with two fingers, holding the dripping bag away from their face. "Thank you, Y/n......at least I have you by my side."
699 notes · View notes
r3starttt · 5 months
Note
Rockstar abby/elliein, in interview!!
"Is your girlfriend dating you because the fame and the money?"
The reader was there even before the fame!
Even asking is offensive! How can someone think that of her girlfriend?!
And reader is in their apartment watching the interview on TV concerd because she's scared ellie/Abby would think that's true
Take your time and take care 🫶
English isn't my first language, I'm sorry for any mistakes
HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS
Rockstar gf! Ellie in an interview
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You’ve met Ellie in high school. She was shy, had her small group of friends and was amazingly smart at science, physics and math, subjects that you sucked at. You’ve always catch her staring at you but whenever you two talked she would act so awkward. You always noticed how her cheeks turned slightly red whenever you were together, how she would toy with her fingers and how her legs would move up and down if she was sitting, making her converse tap on the floor extremely loud. And you also noticed how much effort she added to try and hide it, but she couldn’t.
You were the one to take most first steps on everything, staring with asking for her Instagram thinking you could start to know her more but it failed because her account was empty so you couldn’t get to know anything at all.
Then you proceeded to ask for help at physics, because that was her best subject, which was actually a win because after that you became closer, friends, or so she thought.
You’d had plenty of dates with her after that one class, but it wasn’t until you mentioned the word out loud that Ellie finally understood what was going on, and god she felt so stupid.
When she finally invited you over to her house one of the first things she did was playing guitar to you, to which you asked her if she could sing too, and she did. And when that happened you just couldn’t believe you’ve got such a hot talented smart girlfriend. That’s when you told her she should take advantage of that talent and the idea of making a band wouldn’t disappear from Ellie’s mind.
And that’s how it all started, Dina and Jesse being convinced by ellie to make a band, but not really convinced, they only agreed because how the fuck would a band like this ever work and how would it became famous? it was just for the experience and the fun and to not let her friend die alone.
So they performed for the first time ever at a bar, you’ve asked Ellie to make a cover of bad idea, yeah, from girl in red, and so she did. And for everyone’s surprise (yeah, including you) it worked more than perfectly. By starters, people did pay attention to them, that’s a win right? then people recorded them and asked for any social media to support them and you, from the public’s view, couldn’t be more happier because your girlfriend’s little dream might come true.
Thankfully you were right, they went viral and got a lot of followers real quickly. And so they kept on performing, until they started to make their own music and that just lead them to more fame.
Sooner that you could ever imagine they were already having small concerts, opening shows for bigger artists, being invited to red carpets and big events, appearing on magazines, having photoshoots and of course, being invited to podcast and having interviews as well.
For starters, fans and public in general wasn’t mean to you. When Ellie started to get the girls attention she quickly made sure everyone knew about you. She’d post you on both her own and the bands social media, she’d make you appear on lives, she’d make you go on stage as well. Everything to make sure that you and everyone else knew more than well that you were her girlfriend and she loved you a lot.
There’s the fan girls that hate you a bit and always insist that you’re only there for fame and money, the ones that would do anything to convince Ellie on breaking up with you just because they think they’ll have a chance with her if that ever happens. But after those comments became repetitive you learned to ignore them.
However today you weren’t so sure about it. The band had been invited to a live podcast that was super viral because of the influencers behind it and the type of questions they asked to their guests, as well as a small section at the end where the artists invited would have to read fan comments. They’d make them answer all, and of course they were all the polemic ones. And you knew you will eventually get involved in those comments.
You decided to stay at your shared apartment, you weren’t sure if you were gonna be able to handle the comments. So now you were just laying on bed with your phone on your hands anxiously watching the podcast.
So far everything was good, they’d given some context about themselves and how the band was created. They’ve been talking about how they meet and how it was all the process of becoming famous, and how was fame for them.
That was until they were told about the comments. Honestly at this point you’re way to focused on how fun everything was and how hot Ellie looks to feel anxious, but it does freak you out to see what type of questions they might get, no only Ellie but the whole band, you’re very aware of how annoying and disrespectful people can be.
Most comments are about how hot the three of them are, about how hot Ellie’s tattoo is, the typical fan girl comments that make the whole band laugh and make fun of it. Then there’s also hate comments and that unfortunately where you appear the most. One of the influencers grabs their phone and reads out loud “I bet Ellie’s girlfriend is only there for the fame and the money, she must get a lot from being so close to Dina and Jesse as well. Fucking good luck she has” then he proceeds to say excitedly how many likes the comment has, you hated them and hated this because even though you weren’t there you felt humiliated.
And as much as you try to ignore the whole situation you can’t help but feel like shit, you freaked out because if that comment had so many support that meant there’s a lot of people that thinks that and what assures you neither Ellie, Dina or Jesse have ever thought about it?
The three of them stay in silence for a couple of seconds, everyone just staring at Ellie awkwardly and waiting for her response, including you. And just when anxiety is eating you alive you hear her voice.
“Whoever wrote that comment is jealous as fuck” Ellie says clearly annoyed, her brows furrowed and a very sarcastic smirk on her face “the three of us meet her in high school as well. I was amazed by her when I first saw her but just couldn’t manage to talk to her, I was shy as fuck back then” both Dina and Jesse laughed, nodding their heads as making fun of her because only they know the amount of times Ellie would go with them to speak excitedly about how you had noticed her.
She speaks one more time and you can’t help but feel excited, now you understand the fans “however if she was here for it I don’t mind it at all because she’s hot, y’all wished to be m’ girl, stop being so annoying guys” and you can hear the interviewers laughing at the back, praising her for being so honest and calling fans out since most artists don’t.
And as you’re in bed, watching the live and feeling like a teenager in love. Ellie is dying to grab her phone and make you know how much she adores you and how much she can’t wait to get home with you, but she can’t of course cause she’s live and with her phone way to far from her.
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sinner-sunflower · 1 month
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Lucifer AU idea- Rabbit Hole
Y'all know that Rabbit Hole by Miku song with the animation trend? Imagine Luci doing that dance ugh
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The song is Angel Dust's first official music video that he wrote after breaking free of Valentino's deal.
Ozzie had offered him a job to Club Ozzie's first Pride ring branch and Angel never felt happier.
He got into music as an outlet for his emotions, releasing 'Addict' and 'Poison' to the public via Al's radio show. (He managed to convince Alastor to do it cos it would make his ratings skyrocket past Vox and Alastor loves nothing more than kicking Vox when he's already down)
After the success of his first 2 songs, Angel decided that maybe the 3rd one should have a music video.
With the help of Ozzie as his producer, the project is a go.
Writing the song was the easy part. Angel wanted it to sound fun but also resonate with his past experiences (just read the translation of the lyrics! The one angel wrote is from this Cover!)
One day, he and Ozzie were brainstorming at the Sin's office at the Pride branch.
Ozzie: Angel, this is your first music video! It must be grand! Showstopping! Jaw-dropping! Never before seen! Revolutionary!
Angel: But how do I do that, big dick boss man? I don't think even being greatest porn star Hell has ever seen will wow people now. I've done lots of things and I can't think of anything else.
Ozzie: Hmmm
Just then, Lucifer enters the office.
Lucifer: Ozzie! Just who I'm looking for. I need you to do some inspection regarding your crystals. I just talked to Belphagor and she said that her team just confiscated a whole ton in some imp warehouse in Greed. I know I don't need to meddle but I wouldn't be worried if it was anywhere else. Who knows what Mammon is doing with those and- oh! Angel!
Angel: Heya, Short king.
Lucifer: What are you doing here?
Angel: I work here, baby~
Lucifer: Oh! I knew that haha. And what's this?
The King of Hell gestures to the board they were using for notes.
Angel: Don't tell anyone, but I'm gonna be releasin a new song and it's gonna have a music video!
Lucifer: Really?! That's great! It hasn't been that long too since Poison, wasn't it?
Angel: Yeah, but we wanna catch these motherfuckers off guard
Ozzie: That's why we're brainstorming how we can wow these desensitised demons. I still think we can do-
Lucifer: Why don't I do it?
Angel and Ozzie blink in surprise at the King's words.
Angel: Do what?
Lucifer: Act! In your music video! You know, instead of you, I'll be the uhhh 'rabbit girl'? Not that- you're uh- not enough I just mean that uhm- I think the last thing they'd expect is the King of Hell a sinner's music video.
Angel: Babe, you do know this would be a not safe for work type thing, right?
Lucifer: Yeah? I know? I know you better than you might think, you know.
Ozzie: You sure? Cos Charlie might see this.
Angel: Yeah. I know I don't wanna see my dad basically naked dancing to music.
Lucifer: You can go through it with her if it makes you feel any better. But I'm up for anything.
The two others in the room just stare at him with their mouths wide open.
Lucifer: But if you don't want I...
Angel: Hell no! We are doing this!
Ozzie: Hell won't know what hit em.
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Charlie gave it a green light cos she's so excited about her dad finally socializing and breaking out of his cocoon to really realize what everything is about. Angel wants to record a reaction of the hotel for research purposes.
A few weeks later, the video is done and it's dropped out of nowhere.
Ozzie invited the Sins to the hotel for an exclusive live viewing (he and Angel ofc knew what time it would be released and set the whole thing up)
Everyone sat in the lobby in front of a giant projector (No, Alastor, you can't watch a video on the radio!), and as the clock struck at 9:13 AM on a random Tuesday, the video played.
Let's just say that it certainly did leave mouth agaped and caused mass panic.
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Ozzie anonymously sent a copy to Heaven and somewhere in a bright glowing building, 6 archangels lay unconscious at the ground due to shock,
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If you guys want me to write some dialogue for that first reaction in the hotel, drop the comment!
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bcacstuff · 3 months
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To begin with, I like Jamie Fraser. I watched OL last year, reading the books at the same time. I must say that it’s a wonderful fantasy!!! But a fantasy, nothing else.
After that, I was very curious about the actor who played him. He is a very attractive guy, tall, good looking and with a very sweet smile.
I consider myself a pragmatic woman and I don’t tend to admire people madly. We all are humans, after all, with flaws and I can’t understand why some people can blindly adore someone.
Well, it’s have been an education to discover your blog ( and some others!!) Blimey!
I think SH is a person who wasn’t very fortunate in his early life, he is an actor, not exactly an A degree, but I can tell many names who are on the super big screen and much worse actors than him, only they were luckier, that’s all.
I’m very fortunate, never had money problems, went to the Uni, got degrees and became a successful professional when 25. Earning enough money, always. Not rich, but traveling, having all the experiences. I wonder how SH went from being almost destitute to travel first class and all that comes around it.
When I read comments in Tumblr, well..
Never mind, but sometimes I wonder why people can be so cruel.
After sending this message I received this additional message (you didn't hit the Anon box on that one but as I'm not sure you want your blogger name out here, I just took the screenshot and left the name out)
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So Hi Anon, thanks for your message(s) and sorry for not answering it right away. I just wanted to take some time to answer you.
The way you came to explore things around and about Sam is most likely similar to many others here that follow and read my blog. And the way you consider yourself a pragmatic woman, might be what most people here are as well.
I remember my 'Blimey' when I started to look into things, and that was just around the time Covid hit the world and many things happened in this fandom. It was entertaining but learning about it all was mind blowing as well. A world I never had any knowledge of.
In my younger years, I was a fan of Queen and Freddie Mercury especially, though anything Queen was of interest for me back then. A whole other world as there was no social media and all I could learn was what was written in pop magazines. I pasted all the pics I could find in my school agenda (I still have it) and at the end of the year that schoolagenda grew about 3 times and was held together with tape. And for the rest,I bought all the records, and enjoyed the music. I knew every song by heart.
But this fandom is from a whole other era and nature as well. Social media became a place to say the most horrible things, people would never tell someone at a person's face. It's easy and some people just do not have any filter. In an era where we should learn about communicating it seems we do the opposite. People are more occupied with airing their voice, making their opinion count, and less interested in listening to other opinions, think them through and try to discuss things in a healthy way. Agreeing to disagree or some tolerance for other opinions, is something people are less and less considerate about it seems.
I never intended to start this blog to begin with, but while going along having seen how different opinions were handled, or better said not handled by simply bullying people away or blocking them just because of another opinion, I more or less hoped this blog can be a place where people can differ in opinion, have a place to discuss things in a normal way, without calling each other out or give them names. I don't have an agenda, I do have an opinion sometimes, but it's always subject to change while other or new information comes along or other views on things are expressed. I like to keep a broader view on things and will always say that everyone can form their own opinion and draw their own conclusions from what I report here. And after all, I don't think anybody should get themselves so upset about a different opinion on this blog or about this actor. There are way more important things in this world that are worth to get upset about. Whether an actor is A list or not, or gets an award or not is not one of them.
SH expressed himself a number of times about his youth, upbringing, you could read his book or just watch interviews about how he traveled the world before he became known for OL. I assume in the beginning going from the less fortunate status (financially) to a very fortunate status, is in the beginning something exciting and a person must feel very lucky about it. Though over the years the excitement wears of and you become used to that status. It doesn't mean you feel less lucky though. But it's not always money that makes you feel lucky or happy, I think.
Anyway, I hope you can stay read my blog and not focus on the negatives in the comments, or on other blogs. If you use the word 'cruel', it's a good thing you're not able to see my inbox from time to time. I really don't get why people feel the need to sent a certain kind of messages. I just don't give them the time of day, they're just childish and a waste of time. It's beyond me why they do so and I decided to not try and understand it anymore.
If I intend anything with this blog, it's something like putting things in perspective. It's never only black or white, there are many shades of gray (no pun intended). But in order to see the shades of gray and every other color, there always will be some blacks and some whites as well.
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coldresolve · 1 month
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My grand thesis on sadism
I'm not an expert on anything whatsoever, and studies on sadism are sparse to say the least, so I'm basing this on squinting at concepts I've seen elsewhere and a layman's gut feeling. Here's my thesis:
Introduction
Sadism is when someone feels emotional pleasure as a result of someone else suffering. That's about it, afaik. And yes, this does mean that that one time you said something mean to someone else in the heat of the moment to hurt their feelings, you were behaving sadistically. Sorry lol, sadism isnt a mythical creature, everyone is capable of it
Obviously, some people are more inclined to experience sadistic pleasure than others, which is where we draw that largely arbitrary distinction between sadist and non-sadist. My thesis is that this distinction is a tad more complicated than a binary spectrum: there are (at least) two different types of sadism, both of which play a role in what type of sadist a person is. Those two types are a) emotional sadism, and b) cognitive sadism. I made these terms up just now for the record
Emotional sadism
This is a type of sadism experienced by people who have alexithymic tendencies. Alexithymia affects about 20% of people. It's that thing where you're not very good at distinguishing or expressing different emotional states; distinguishing emotions from non-emotional bodily sensations such as hunger or fatigue, and; distinguishing between your own emotions from those you feel through empathy. (Loads of alexithymic people think they don't experience empathy; they do, they just don't attribute their feelings to other people.) Alexithymics will often have difficulty describing their emotions beyond negative, positive, or neutral. But some alexithymics, in certain regards to certain emotions, will have difficulty even doing that.
By attributing sadism to alexithymic tendencies, what I mean is this: You see someone suffering, and you feel a rush of adrenaline. But because you kinda suck at distinguishing this rush as the negative emotions felt by the other, transferred to you through identification and/or empathy - your brain interprets the rush as a positive experienced by you, which is influenced by, but still independent from the suffering experienced by the other. I hope I'm explaining this okay lol but this is the most plausible explanation I could come up with as to why sadistic ppls brains will interpret other people's suffering as a source of pleasure, because there is a significant correlation between alexithymia and the dark tetrad.
Cognitive sadism
Cognitive sadism can be summerized very sussinctly by this quote from C. Fred Alford:
Sadism is the joy of avoiding victimhood, though that puts it too passively. Sadism is the joy of having taken control of the experience of victimhood by inflicting it on another.
Cognitive sadism is an expression of control over the role of victimhood by imposing it on another person. I view this as the sub/conscious justification that drives sadistic actions, seperate to the emotional state experienced by the sadist after the act has taken place. These are, in my opinion, two seperate processes.
K, but so what?
Viewing these two things as seperate processes might help us distinguish between different types of sadists, by simply adding or subtracting. Here are some terms for what I mean that I also literally just came up with lol:
The Opportunistic Sadist: Experiences emotional sadism, but has no inclinations toward cognitive sadism. This means that they will experience sadistic gratification at witnessing the suffering of another, but they have no desire to be the one inflicting said suffering themself. (A good portion of yall are like this from what I've seen)
The Remorseful Sadist: Seeks control by imposing victimhood on others, but can distinguish their empathetic response as other-oriented and distinctly negative, leading to intense feelings of guilt/shame/remorse/whatever after the fact. (Industry secret: a large portion of people who broadcast themselves as hardline sadists secretly fall into this category. They'll never admit it lol)
The Pure Sadist: Experiences both the alexithymic empathy response and control-seeking inclinations. What most people think of when they conceptualize sadists; people like this are pretty rare in my experience? But I also have no data on it so like.
Anyway here's a graph I made:
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The graph means I'm basically an academic about it lol idk
Conclusion
Fuck if I know, I'm just thinking thoughts about it for now tbh
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sgiandubh · 6 months
Note
So about TCND. NO I'M KIDDING. Don't throw me away. What else are you watching or reading or interested in lately? There isn't actually anything to talk about regarding OL (the show or actors therein) and TCND is off the table until someone has actually seen it. Anything interesting going on?
Dear What Else Anon,
Oh, I am definitely not going to throw out such a wonderful question! I do think there are more things of interest regarding OL and actors therein (more on this, tomorrow and mood/current drama allowing). But your ask reminded me (and should remind anyone) there are other things happening under the sun than this.
I am still fighting with The Fiery Cross. Sometimes, I get tired of its unjustified slow burn and briefly seek solace somewhere else. While I quit the horrible habit of reading two books simultaneously years ago, I find soothing to sometimes take a break with a good poem.
This one, for example: Brecht's Questions From a Worker Who Reads (translated into English by M. Hamburger - probably the most satisfying version I could find on the Internet, right now - the original is um, more complex)
Who built Thebes of the seven gates? In the books you will find the name of kings. Did the kings haul up the lumps of rock? And Babylon, many times demolished. Who raised it up so many times? In what houses Of gold-glittering Lima did the builders live? Where, the evening that the Wall of China was finished Did the masons go? Great Rome Is full of triumphal arches. Who erected them? Over whom Did the Caesars triumph? Had Byzantium, much praised in song, Only palaces for its inhabitants? Even in fabled Atlantis The night the ocean engulfed it The drowning still bawled for their slaves.
The young Alexander conquered India. Was he alone? Caesar beat the Gauls. Did he not have even a cook with him? Philip of Spain wept when his armada Went down. Was he the only one to weep? Frederick the Second won the Seven Years' War. Who Else won it?
Every page a victory. Who cooked the feast for the victors? Every ten years a great man. Who paid the bill?
So many reports. So many questions.
Speaking of Byzantium, this reminded me of Bissera Pentcheva and Jonathan Abel's absolutely remarkable experiment into reconstructing (by computer) the acoustics of Constantinople's Agia Sophia and use it as an audio filter for sacred music recordings. In order to do that, she simply had to pop a balloon inside the cathedral (with special permit and adequate measuring and recording equipment) - it took her five days to get the perfect pitch. As a result, we now can hear those hymns the same way someone would around 1400, AD. This is probably the closest we could get to time travel:
youtube
Oh, and I am also watching The Crown's sixth and last season, as many in this fandom, I suppose. More on this, when we are completely done with it. OL was the only exception to my read/listen/watch it all before discussing it rule.
You are obviously Anon but I have to thank you for this! Brought up wonderful memories of week-ends in Constantinople, staying at the Hagia Sofia Mansions and nearly touching its roof from the window of my room in the Yeșil Ev villa. Today, it's over: the Hilton guys took the whole complex and revamped it, Mafia style.
But this memory will never go away:
... a room
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....with a view:
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Would it be a good idea to make a new, weekly series out of your ask, perhaps something along the lines of Life Beyond OL? I am seriously toying with it, if that's what it takes to try and keep a modicum of sanity during promo: you decide on this one, here is a poll.
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fallout-lou-begas · 1 year
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i'm not as clued into the modding scene as i used to be but i've been getting a lot of vids in my recs of people using AI voices in new vegas lately, like i got a video a while ago of someone demonstrating that they used AI voice generation on one of the generic NPC voices to generate new voiced NPCs for the prototype of a quest mod, and i think i feel…………bad! about this!
i can understand people being excited about "oh but now modded quests don't have to rely on amateur voice acting for their new NPCs!", but it just really doesn't sit right with me for a lot of the same reasons that AI generated visual art does. the AI generated voice is uncanny, either struggling to convey tone or affect or conveying way too much tone or affect, in a way that doesn't necessarily make it "better" than a real human performance done on even a shitty mic. there's no subtlety in it. and the stink of necromancy from puppeting a real human's voice around like this is unignorable, like if someone did this to my voice i think i'd be disgusted, and i'm not even a professional voice actor.
and i do think shitty amateurish voice acting in video game mods is fine. i joke about it a lot but it's human. it shows passion. and it gives people something to do, it's part of the project, it's making something yourself from scraps, and this is subjective of me but that feels like the way you ought to do it, yknow? and if people shell out for some actually good voice acting that isn't recorded on shitty mics without the room tone taken out, then it gives these aspiring voice actors some actual experience and credit that they can take with them to other projects. but if video game modders wholeheartedly embrace "just use AI" for all of their voice acting needs, that and every other aspect of mod creation will just get abandoned. and i think i feel bad and weird about it because as technology has gotten so much better and more efficient at creating things for us, the actual act of creating things ourselves is getting viewed more and more as inefficient or suboptimal, when even an untrained human touch will always feel more real to me than anything else could. entire quests full of NPCs wearing the scavenged voiceboxes of real human voice actors just sounds like a haunted house.
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hyenahunt · 1 month
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Obbligato: The Punishment of Kaname Tojo - 11
Writer: Akira
Season: Spring, two years ago
Characters: ???, Ibara
Proofreading: Remi + 310mc (JP) & Skyress (ENG)
Translation: Peace & hyenahunt
Ibara: Oh, are you ignoring me? Well, no matter. I'll continue to talk nonetheless.
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[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]
???: ( — What are you doing, Kaname?)
(What on Earth are you thinking...?)
(Who told you to say any of that?! You're to do exactly as we ordered you to do! That was the agreement, don't just do as you'd like!)
(When you lost your esteemed title of Special Student, who was it that saved you?)
(Was it Tatsumi Kazehaya, the man you’re standing side-by-side with right now who has such a saintly smile on his face?)
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???: (It wasn't! I did! I'm the one who helped you! No one else but me!)
(And yet here you are! Have you forgotten the debt you owe me...?!)
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Ibara: Hmm~? My, what's this, whoever could this be~?
???: ...?!
Ibara: How strange! No matter how I look at you, you appear to be the renowned top idol of Reimei Academy — Mr. HiMERU, correct?
But right now, isn't Mr. HiMERU standing on the stage and making a speech? In that case, who is this observer over here?
???: ......
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Ibara: Oh, are you ignoring me? Well, no matter. I'll continue to talk nonetheless.
My apologies if it grates on your ears! But you see, running my mouth like this is precisely how I conduct my business!
???: Who are you?
Ibara: That would be my line, but here, my card — this is who I am.
???: Ibara Saegusa, is it? You seem to be a manager affiliated with CosPro's company and institutions such as Reimei Academy and the like.
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Ibara: Indeed. I'm very pleased to make your acquaintance, nameless stranger.
It's been you all along, hasn't it? You're the mysterious stranger who's been providing Mr. HiMERU with support from the shadows.
At first, I thought it was that person — the man who dwells within Reimei Academy, a monstrous existence who must not even be named.
The man whose very name is taboo within this industry...
That man has taken to residing on the school grounds, living and doing as he pleases. He's been fending for himself and doing things such as starting bonfires and grilling meat, it seems.
But it must be known that this man is no ordinary vagrant who has made the school into his home. The truth is that he's a legend of the industry — a lingering reminder of the original Super Idols.
He's a monster who built up the idol world on his own.
Well, that monster bore children left and right, and that is nothing unusual about him if that’s truly all he had to him. For the record, I, Ibara Saegusa, am one of that man's descendants as well.
But unlike me, that vagrant of Reimei Academy is a most untouchable existence.
Of course, I don't need to explain any of this to you, do I? Tojo —
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???: I discarded that name.
I had no intention of ever being involved with the likes of you.
Afterwards, I left everything behind and sought a place abroad.
Ibara: Certainly, you have. I gathered similarly from the investigations I've conducted.
You discarded both your name and your face, becoming a disciple of a certain someone and mastering the art of disguise. In that way, you've lived on wearing many different faces, taking the place of others and acting on their behalf.
???: I only bought the technique to do so off of that man.
He approached me simply because I happened to have a slight blood relation to the original Super Idol.
He more forced the technique onto me than anything, though. While it's convenient, I don't feel any debt towards him for it.
I cast everything away. My name, my heart. My connections to others.
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???: (Or I was supposed to, at least.)
(I received a letter from my father, who I hadn't heard from for the longest time.)
(Even now I haven't a clue of how he obtained my address, but I have a hunch that that man — the Priest — was involved.)
(Naturally, I immediately crumpled that letter into a ball and tossed it away without reading a word. He and I are strangers now, and it's annoying to be contacted out of the blue.)
(That's what I thought. But I found myself unsettled by my lack of knowledge of what it said, and so I read it.)
(Within, he wrote of a younger brother I had. And it just so happened that my brother was in a difficult situation, asking to be helped out.)
(Until that moment, I hadn't known I had a brother at all.)
(Without knowing anything at all, my younger sibling — Kaname Tojo — thoughtlessly became an idol.)
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???: (What an idiot. A descendent from such a sinful family, tainted to the core by taboo—)
(Who, without knowing anything at all, became an idol.)
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myjunkisyuzuruhanyu · 6 months
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*sigh* alright guess it's time to ask...
Expectations for the men's gpf?
Personally, I feel it's gonna be a 4 way race between Shoma, Yuma, Ilia, and Adam, which means who knows what the podium will look like in any form... though if even 1 or 2 of those 4 bomb and Kao and/or Kevin skate clean, who knows...
And to go even further in my thoughts, I would say Shoma has the LOWEST chance of falling off the podium, while Adam has the highest... too much pressure and apparently this is his first gpf? I saw someone say that. I could see Adam bombing, considering he's the favorite and going last in the short I think.
...what has this sport done to me
This GPF is really unpredictable. Actually anyone could podium depending on how the competition goes. What I can definetly say is that this is one of the best packed GPF there ever was.
The best 6 men of the GP series really did make it. Each of them has something special: Ilia has the highest possible BV and the 4A, Adam developed into a secure jumper but also brings a different style to skating, Yuma has stunning softness about his skating with beautiful executed elements, Kevin is just a showmaster on the ice, Kao has this raw energy about him and Shoma is a master in terms artistry and audience emoting and spell binding magic with the softest knees and brings the overall package to the ice.
This analysis is done simply from a mathematical point of view, so it doesn't say anything about deserved or not. There is a sort of track record that indicates the advantages and disadvantages.
If we look at highest total scores from the GP series that would go:
1. Ilia 2.Adam 3.Yuma 4.Shoma 5.Kevin 6.Kao
If we look at their personal best scores that would go
1. Shoma 2.Ilia 3.Yuma 4.Adam 5.Kevin 6.Kao
If we take into consideration their current BV layout that would go:
1. Ilia 2.Shoma 3.Adam 4.Kao 5.Yuma 6.Kevin
Imo a clean Shoma is unbeatable. But even an "unclean" Shoma usually gets more PCS than everyone else (even if Adam had a higher PCS at CoC fs but there was a cap to Shoma's PCS) and usually Shoma has a GOE advantage on Ilia and Adam on spins and in general Shoma's GOEs are high (let's really forget the final NHK score and look at the tech box GOEs they were massive). He also has the status as two time world champion and ofc experience and calmness to be the leader however ofc if tech panel is super strict with him again nothing can save him and ofc if mistakes happen, he may even be off podium. But I think Shoma's scoring potential is the highest and contrary to Ilia and Adam he hadn't shown his full potential this season and usually Shoma paces himself well towards the big competitions. So all in all I agree on Shoma being the unlikeliest to place off podium. (But well if this season taught us anything then that nothing is for granted not even for two time world champion Shoma)
Ilia and Adam - Ilia even more than Adam - have the BV advantage and their massive season best scores to show. So if they can repeat that they are the medal winners. Both looked fairly secure so far this season but we haven't seen Ilia for almost a month and Adam may also have peaked a bit early with all his competitions. CoC was his 6th competition the season!
If Yuma would have his old content I would put him up with Ilia, Adam and Shoma, but atm he doesn't have the same BV as before his injury. I am not sure he will upgrade his content. If he doesn't than he can win the SP, but winning overall depends on the others. Let's say he cannot achieve the win by his own merits. But a medal is possible nonetheless as it's unlikely Shoma, Adam and Ilia can all produce their best skates. And Yuma's scores aren't bad at all for his BV being much lower.
Pressure is a different beast and it's Yuma's and Adam's first GPF and on both are certain expectations Adam as the first qualifier and Yuma as the 2nd one beating Shoma and also the one who has the highest SP score of the season by a tenth but still. That is a disadvantage.
Kao has more BV than Kevin but his GOEs on spins and steps aren't as good as of the others and his PCS are not that high either. And I don't think it helps his case to have two other Japanese men at the GPF to uplevel his PCS reputation. He's also not as secure as Yuma, Shoma, Ilia and Adam. Kao will only medal if at least two of the other 4 will make costly mistakes.
Kevin is completely dependent on the others making mistakes to get to the podium. His PCS are among the highest, he gets good GOEs but his BV is too low to win a medal on his own accord.
That would be my analysis. But as experience tell nothing has to go like expected. I mean NHK scoring was really the best example that anyone can get crashed if the tech panel and judges want you to. We can only hope for fairness and amazing skates. May the best combined of both days win.
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archivalofsins · 1 month
Text
So, let's talk about the last few questions.
In this post we'll be discussing Kotoko's second trial interrogation questions.
Here's every post I've made regarding all of her interrogation questions.
Question 1, Question 2, Question 3, Questions 4-7 Part 1, Question 7-9 Part 2, Question 10.
So, today we'll be attempting to cover every question that has come out since then.
That means questions eleven through sixteen.
They aren't really that interesting but at least the written interrogation is almost over. This trial has been rather repetitive if I'm being honest.
But first let's address the elephant in the room-
I want to spend the beginning of this post discussing the behavior exhibited by a few bad apples over the course of Kotoko's second trial. What follows are just my personal experiences and my opinions on the matter.
Gunsli; why haven't you been discussing the questions the day they release? You were doing it that way at the start. Why are you waiting for a batch of them to drop then writing something up on it now? To take it further why are you being so thorough when it comes to Kotoko specifically? I mean you weren't like this with any of the other prisoners.
Okay, example questions that I've written up to answer. For anyone new here I was like this with other characters. Like literally this whole side blog is like this.
I spent the second trial of one of my favorite characters blatantly stating he was lying in every way possible. Highlighting it was definitely him that did that shit and how unfair it was that he was coasting to an innocent verdict in comparison to the trials of others before him. Regardless of if others wanted to speculate differently.
So, please believe me when I say one thing, I am consistent in my behavior.
I talk and write about the things that interest me.
Literally all of the prisoner's written interrogations have been interesting to me to varying degrees. Kotoko isn't the first prisoner I've written a lot about, and she won't be the last.
This is Milgram.
This is how it works. We've gone nine other trials doing the same thing for everyone else. Kotoko is not special. This is just another trial on the record for me. Sorry not sorry; don't go losing your heads over it now. She's no different from the nine other characters to come before her.
Plus, to be crass for a moment Kotoko doesn't want to step on anyone here anyway. She especially isn't going to want to step on the people that fully believe she's right. I've got a better chance of being stepped on by her than any of the yes man thirsting after her. Well, that is if Anti Beat is anything to go by.
With that low shot out of the way. I have been as critical of every prisoner as I've been with Kotoko. Even going as far to highlight when my own biases may be impacting my view on a character or their situation. The only character in Milgram who even remotely got any leniency from me if we're being real was Kazui.
The only reason that was is because people were espousing what came off to me as homophobic rhetoric in regards to his case, and I didn't want anything I said to be involved with that. Even still when I said what I thought he did after his trial ended, I still got flack for it. He wasn't even on fucking trial anymore it literally couldn't impact anything to speak about the concept in good faith.
So, I'm not coming at this brand new. I try to remain as consistent as possible. I have my lines and stick to them.
Even though I can get heated just like anyone else I still try my best to not compromise myself and discuss the topics at hand with consideration towards others. The reason I've moved to discussing Kotoko's written interrogation in batches like this is because-
One, it's more entertaining for me to do it that way and keeps my own attention better. Since I'm busy with life stuff currently. Also, it gives breathing room for the tag to die down in activity. So, more avid fans of her character don't end up coming across my post. Whether anyone wants to believe it or not some of Kotoko's fans have simply been the most obnoxious out of any trial to happen so far.
One going as far as to direct message me with what they believed to be pertinent corrective information that needed to be brought to my attention about a post I made. Condescendingly telling me I think you don't know what that word means causing this post to be necessary.
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These are all the screenshots of it I still have from sharing this experience on discord. Honestly, I don't have a damn thing to hide. Even though I believe my behavior in this instance could have been better.
The behavior exhibited by this party regardless of how they personally feel about Kotoko or not was incredibly inappropriate. They contacted me under the belief that they could educate me on my improper use of this term. For what I can only believe was in the hopes of me rewording the post I had written to use a softer and less serious phrase in their opinion.
The way this person went about this was to me indicative of an entitled and woefully misinformed individual. They begin this conversation by demeaning my intelligence. Then when informed they were in fact incorrect about their assertion state,
"I apologize with that, I wasn't trying to say grooming can only be sexual. That wasn't exactly my point though with messaging you about this."
Then continued to denote that grooming can only occur when physical touch is present through stating,
"Grooming is still a very serious term to throw around, so I do not see how Kotoko deliberately pushing a child away from her and manipulating her to retract a testimony can somehow equate to grooming her."
A sentiment that still implies this individual believes on some level that all grooming is overtly physical or sexual.
I can admit I came on strong in these direct messages with this individual. Who again decided they just had to contact me about what they believed to be an egregious error on my part. I was defensive due to being rightfully upset by the situation occurring. However, this instance is not indicative of the sort of person I want to be when instances like this arise.
Even if from my perspective this individual had messaged me in a very accusatory, combative, disrespectful fashion that ultimately ended in insulting my intelligence. I can recognize how me sticking to facts and definitions may come off as callous, inconsiderate, or obstinate.
Still, I've stated before and I will state again I do not argue with people over their subjective opinions.
That is why when it came to my attention this was a subjective and personal interpretation which had nothing to do with my wording or the meaning of the term being used, I told this person as much. Then the discussion ended shortly after. Did I have to explain my point of view further when I stated that to them? No, I did not. At the time I was very annoyed that someone had messaged me with a lecture about something they didn't fully understand and were only treating seriously to use as a justification for why Kotoko or her actions should not be referred to in the way I did.
An individual going from, "I think you were using this term wrong" to "Well even if you were using it correctly I still think it's a very serious term to just fling around like you are". Is incredibly wishy washy to say the least and at the most disingenuous. In my opinion the behavior exhibited was not treating the topic of grooming with the seriousness it deserved.
I used the term I did in that post because this topic matters to me. It is something I am very serious about for personal reasons. For someone to message me something of this nature without knowing one thing about me or my life solely based on my post about Kotoko is disrespectful. They don't know what I know, what I've been through, or what experiences shaped me concluding what I did.
They just saw me saying something they didn't like/agree with about a character they enjoy and messaged me this without taking my own personhood into consideration. I could have blocked them. I didn't have to engage. I could have spent that hour doing something better with my time than being pestered by someone who had already chosen what their opinion of me was before even messaging under the guise of just wanting to share their concerns.
Because heaven forbid people know the technical definition of grooming or how to spot it. I mean if they did that may actually help people recognize when it's happening outside of a sexual context and move away from individuals that may be predating on them. What kind of sicko would want that? Me I want that. I want people to know how to spot these things because it's important and it allows people to be safer in real life. I don't think it's a controversial opinion to have or to state. I don't think that's an odd thing to want.
I'm not worried about fictional people. I'm worried about the safety and well-being of real people. How the beliefs people apply in Milgram can impact how they act in their real lives, the way they treat others, and how they analyze difficult and controversial topics. Maybe if we just fling around terms when they're applicable people just might learn something. Even if some people don't see how this applies or even agree with the assertion on a subjective level.
Some people in this fandom could really benefit from becoming comfortable with saying that lesson wasn't meant for me and moving the fuck on. Instead of doing things like this.
Outside of this instance other people have been harassing me before this trial even fucking started. So, what the fuck am I meant to do in this situation, huh? Some people may feel like I should stop talking about it. Yet, the fact that some people have no clue what the definition of grooming is should be a topic of concern and discussion actually. That's a legitimate problem.
Which is why I made that post discussing it.
So, from this I know personally that more avid fans have been behaving in this manner since checks notes (the timestamp of the discord messages)-
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The day after her song was released.
So, if anyone doesn't see a back and forth happening here, please assume it's happening in private just like many did with other trials. Instead of believing both parties are ignoring the other and equally dismissive.
In previous trials people wanted to talk about taking things too seriously, Milgram being in good fun, and the characters not being real people when it came to literal depictions of child abuse and neglect.
There were a fair few people reducing Amane's situation to not treating her like a child because she asked us not to do that. Stating that treating her like a victim of abuse was comparable to treating her like a child. That doing so would be infantilizing and something she expressed not wanting in her first voice drama.
Ignore the fact that in her second voice drama Es specifically speculates that she on some level did want to be treated like a child and for her mistakes to be forgiven.
Along with these line that blatantly allude to this being the case from her first song Magic,
"Dear wise one, is this ok? Is it ok to be weak sometimes? I promise! A good girl that keeps a promise is like, mwah! I won’t say “I’ve had enough” Will you laugh with me and forgive me?"
"I hope, I hope everyone can be happy and smile. Forever, forever together would be a dream. Dear wise one, Am I worthy? Is it ok to spoil myself?"
"Even I can say "I'm sorry". Even I have hope I swear! I'm going to be a good girl now! That's it!"
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This isn't about the abuse or her age this about taking a firm stance against cult mentalities. Amane needs to know that this sort of behavior is wrong and is never excusable even when you're being actively abused. Despite that not being the case at all during Mu's first trial.
It's like trauma and abuse are only a reasonable justification that should be taken into consideration to further contextualize the situation at hand only when it's certain characters. Not something that is getting applied equally across trials. Statements such as these prompted me to state this at the time.
Some fans of the series even going as far to state the individuals who wanted Amane Innocent during that trial were mean, aggressive, rabid, and unreasonable. Based on things happening from other platforms that certain individuals choose to bring here.
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For some reason during Amane's trial people were barely discussing the blatant trauma displayed let alone speculating about other trauma she may have.
Then when discussing this situation with a friend during the day of the eclipse they brought up how everyone was really different about Haruka's trauma too. Voting him guilty for safety reasons or to show him how he was behaving was wrong and undesirable. Despite a 50/50 being possible in his situation. The same reasons people tried to use again with Amane.
So, I really don't see why some people believe speculating about Kotoko having trauma, something that everyone in Milgram and every person on earth has, is going to better contextualize her behavior, bring nuance to, or even help her case. The fandom has consistently shown that they do not care about people with trauma over the course of trial two unless it's a certain type. Some want to state that others are pushing forth the idea that Kotoko doesn't have trauma when I've personally seen no one say that and I have not said that myself.
Because it would be asine to say that. Everyone in the world has trauma to varying extents. I could not walk up to one person and ask hey do you have trauma that would go, "Actually no.... I don't think I have any. Nothing in my life has ever upset me to the extent of it being traumatic. I've actually never had any troubles ever. The world is just perfect for me. I look outside the airs crisp the sun shines all time. Sure I've faced hardships but nothing as severe as what it takes to have genuine trauma and no I've never needed therapy. I'll also never go."
It would sound off if someone told me that. It would sound a lot like, "Well some have it worse so I can't complain. Even the worst thing that has happened to me couldn't compare to what people who truly struggle go through." When honestly people can be doing worse than you and that would not diminish the experiences in your life that have hurt you or even excuse those people who have had it worse hurting you if they do. The reverse is true too. Someone could be doing better than you and that in no way can be used to dismiss the struggles they've gone through or the pain your actions may cause them.
That's just simply not how anything works. Trauma is not a competition. Sure there are varying degrees of trauma and not everyone's is going to be the same. Think of it like a burn there are different degrees but at the end of the day everyone still gets burned every once and a while. We can discuss the severity but at the end of the day all burns need treatment and time to heal. Getting burned is no excuse to be an arsonist. That has always been my point with this. Not that Kotoko doesn't have trauma but that having trauma is a normal part of life. That does not make anyone less or more than the other people around them.
I've only pointed out that I believe it's a bit ableist to state she has to have trauma because "No normal person ends up like her" or "Because no one without trauma would end up the way she is". Because newsflash everyone has some sort of trauma. Something I don't personally have an issue admitting. Furthermore, anyone could end up like Kotoko no one has to be a special sort of messed up in their past to end up the way she is. Yet not being a special sort of messed up from your past doesn't it make it more likely for someone to turn out like Kotoko.
Any person could turn out like this. Anybody could choose to behave the same way she does. Regardless someone's past does not justify or excuse them being cruel or lashing out at others. Plus, like I covered in both Amane and Haruka's cases their trauma was either blatantly ignored or weaponized against them. So, I don't see how speculating about this will make the situation better.
If that's just what people enjoy doing with their time go for it. I'm not one to knock what others find enjoyable as long as they aren't hurting others.
Plus, on a personal note I love a bit of angst every now and then myself. As well as project on the characters that I relate to. So, I understand why a good deal of people would be attached to the concept of her having trauma, maybe even trauma like their own.
However, other people not enjoying that is no reason to consistently harass or mistreat them. People can have their fun but it shouldn't be at the expense of the people around them and their feelings. I'm personally not going to speculate about shit we haven't seen at all and I have no interest in.
Kotoko having the sort of traumatic past for the reasons some individuals want her to have one just does not intrigue me. I'm not speculating on this at this time because the way it is being speculated is demeaning to me.
Want to know the most fucked up part?
People will say that others are saying she doesn't have trauma. Including myself in this when I literally fucking speculated, she had a dissociative disorder.
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Something that forms through traumatic events.
So, it's not even like I'm avidly against this, don't see the merit in thinking about it, or haven't speculated on this before. I just don't think having trauma should be used as a justification or excuse for how she has behaved in the past or has stated she is committed to continuing to behave now.
I also don't believe it is something readily apparent based on how she behaves. Because again that's fucking ableist regardless of how I slice it that's how it comes off. Yet even if I didn't fucking speculate that and I saw no merit in examining Kotoko's possible trauma. That would be a personal decision of mine deserving of respect, not a thing to be antagonized over.
To be honest I find it interesting and somewhat disingenuous that things are suddenly that serious now.
Oh, but no it's only that serious if that speculative information is being used to explain and give additional context to her behavior specifically. Only if the one doing so is presenting that in a sympathetic way of course. If they're doing this in a way that comes off as demonizing Kotoko to the other party or displaying that she's wrong, then they get messages like those.
Explaining politely that they are in fact a moron, whose statements have really hurt the other person's feelings, that just doesn't know the harm their words are causing or the definition of the terms they use. To people viewing these issues in this way suddenly the other party is the sort of person who couldn't analyze their way out of a paper bag let alone through Milgram.
You just don't get it- You're a,
Moron who just didn’t understand.
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Q.10 What were you called online?
Kotoko: A lot of things. Cause there were people who supported me, and then there were also morons who just didn’t understand.
No need to fret though these good people are here to help teach you the right way to interpret this now. You can learn the right way to analyze this, okay? A way that isn't so offensive to them. If you can do that maybe there's still some hope for you. Ya little dumb-dumb. With your little dumb-dumb theories and statements that lack nuance. Oh, you little thing you- If you can just listen now there's still a chance.
If you can't then you're just one of those people, it seems.
Wait, wait hold on- Let's wind it back a bit.
What about the logic used before? What if all the people voting Kotoko guilty were just having fun and the innocent voters were so aggressive and unreasonable? So, what if some people wanted to vote Kotoko guilty for the fuck of it. They're just trying to have some fun guys, it's not that serious. She's not a real person.
How would people behaving in that manner now be any different from any of the other trials then? Other than the fact that some of the people involved are on the receiving end of it this time.
At least I wouldn't be making an entire fucking shrine over it! Bribing people to vote a certain way and creating a new superstition. Yet to some of the people behaving in these ways towards other people the other party just talking about it online is bad enough.
The only reason that things have been quiet in this case is due to a lot of people who are too nice not wanting to rock the boat and staying quiet. Not because nothing is going on at all. Just like with the anon sent to the confession blog. There have been individuals who act like this for a well-documented amount of time. Harassing people behind the guise of anonymity and in private. The tactics have not changed, and individuals who choose to behave in this way will do anything to who they view as against them in the moment without much thought.
This is not an us versus them situation. This is not a cold war. This is a few bad actors harassing people for enjoying and viewing things in a different way than them.
I believe that's the definition of taking things too seriously when it comes to Milgram. So yeah, I'm saying my piece and hauling ass as quickly as possible and doing something else.
Because this is what people who even remotely discuss any of the characters analytically get for it. Not even just Kotoko. This same shit has happened to me multiple times throughout the second trial of Milgram with different characters. Which is why I treat all of this like any other day.
Yet, through saying this I recognize there are still going to be some who could frame me as behaving like this. Some people may seriously view myself and others who discuss Kotoko in ways they dislike as literal villains. People that are just conniving in the shadows to ruin her good name and strip her miraculous character of all nuance.
Evil laughing guffawing like fucking Alvin and Chipmunks villains. As they rub their hands together and laugh with their high pitch voices of sin.
Mwahahah-
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"Look at her bloody evil covered in sin we've done it- We've ruined and flattened this character! We've achieved! Yaha!" They possibly imagine people who discuss her in disagreeable ways cheering as they hit that post button with a menacing grin. Just like Kotoko doing her fucking journalism and all that research.
It's so funny how much both parties in this situation have in common with Kotoko when one takes a step back to really think about it.
Hell, some fans of Milgram look at the work the staff on the series does and how certain characters have been portrayed in canon over the course of trial two the same way as people are being viewed in this situation for how they discuss Kotoko. Something that has been happening for a while. The people who create the thing aren't even exempt from this sort of behavior.
There are a good deal of people who act like this toward others then go crying about how there isn't enough nuance being applied in these situations. How people just aren't thinking about these things hard enough or in the right way. When really there is nuance just not the sort they want.
I talk about Milgram for my own enjoyment.
I'm not getting anything from this outside of displaying that enjoyment for the most part. I don't have a vendetta against Kotoko as a character. None of the Milgram characters are the people who consider themselves to be their fans.
How the people that claim to like these characters treat other real people is completely on them, reflective of their character, and ability for empathy. Simply put they chose to treat other people the ways they did and they are responsible for that regardless of how in the right they believe they are.
Yet, even if some bad actors who call themselves fans of hers consistently caused me strife that doesn't impact how much I like Kotoko's character. Just like me discussing her in a not completely positive light isn't indicative of my feelings on her either.
I can separate a character from their fans. I had a lot of practice with other prisoners before this. I can criticize a characters actions while still grasping and understanding their motivations. This is just another Monday where I talk about the things I like the way I enjoy discussing them. This trial is like every other trial to me.
In my opinion the fandom hasn't changed one bit and if anyone were to pop the hood they'd see all the gunked up gears inside. Yet, heed this warning once you go under you don't go back up top without getting dirty.
That's Milgram and it always has been.
This is what this fandom is like. A lot of good people are trying to make the best of it. Even those mistakenly hurting others in their upset are just trying to look out for their own enjoyment. Possibly in what may be the only way they know how to in this moment. That's really the only grace I can extend at this time.
So, as always when I discuss things like this within the fandom- Remember to treat people how you would personally like to be treated. How you would want your opinions and beliefs to be treated. Remember that this fandom is a space for more people than yourself. So, not everyone is going to view things the same way as you.
Take a step back and realize how amazing and enriching that fact can be. Take a moment to appreciate the diversity that each person within this fandom contributes to it. Whether that's for better or worse.
If someone's views aren't doing any harm to real people then the best thing to be is respectful. No one would want another person to walk up to them then tell them they're enjoying something they like improperly. Yes someone's individual beliefs can upset another person and be in direct opposition to what they believe but that's not causing anyone harm. Not everyone I meet in my life is going to agree with my personal beliefs or how I present them.
That does not diminish the value of those beliefs.
Diversity of thought isn't an issue. It's only becomes an issue when those thoughts turn into actions that hurt people. In fact, diversity of thought is how nuance is formed. The thing some are saying Kotoko's case does not have enough of. Which is why that statement rings so disingenuous to me across fandoms not just here.
If for some reason it's impossible for another person to be considerate and respectful of the other individuals they share a space with then they should remove themselves from that space. There is no reason for anyone to actively antagonize others on their posts in a bad faith, disrespectful, and reductive ways. There's especially no reason to direct message someone in an attempt to make them feel insecure or uncertain about something they've posted just because one may personally disagree with it.
I'm not sorry about the way I discuss Kotoko.
I am sorry that so many people are more concerned over the perception of a fictional character that they've begun stepping on the feelings and boundaries of the real people they share a space with. I'm ashamed that individuals in the fandom have and are continuing to act the ways I've experienced, seen, and heard of them acting towards people.
All of whom do quite frankly thankless work at times. I can only hope that the people who have behaved in this manner over the course of the series mature one day and recognize how detrimental their actions have been not only for themselves but to those around them.
This is the only time I will be discussing this situation in depth.
Now onto the questions.
I'm going to be brief with some of these because I didn't really feel like they gave much of anything new.
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Q.11 Is there really no chance to start anew for wrongdoers?
Kotoko: No way. Once a beast gets a taste for human flesh, it will always come back for seconds.
From the beginning Kotoko hasn't been focused on if people can change. She has been focused on making them understand the suffering and pain they've caused. She's stated that people can't realize the severity of what they've done without first losing something themselves in her second voice drama,
"Es, look. Someone who committed a crime can only realise its severity through losing something. I've seen many criminals, but none of them would give way without pain."
Yet, this goes as far back as her first trial song.
"I’ll teach you the pain you caused. It’s a tie after saying sorry? What are you hoping for?"
Where she blatantly states that this isn't about apologizing and making amends it's about the other person experiencing the same pain as they caused. Throughout Harrow we also see that one of the people that Kotoko jumps has been held accountable by a court of law. However as we know from Kotoko's seventh second trial written interrogation question she has her doubts about the legal systems ability to properly punish sin.
So, she may not believe that a punishment handed down by judiciary is good enough in this circumstance. Especially for an individual implied to be a repeat offender. Him possibly getting a slap on the wrist for something he has a pattern of doing would probably only frustrate her more.
Especially if Kotoko was connected to the person he swindled in any way. Then that would make this situation more of a personal one.
So, let's take a look back at the articles from Harrow. For the record this is more speculative so feel free to ignore it.
I just felt there was something strange about the newspaper articles in her case. On of them is about a serial killer going around murdering young girls. Yet the others are mostly petty financially exploitative crimes that expressly take advantage of an elderly woman, moms, and bike owners.
That a pretty huge leap in severity. I wouldn't really think that much of it if it weren't for what we know about Kotoko.
Q.08  Tell us your family structure.
Kotoko: Grandmother, father, mother, older brother.
Q.08 What are your parent’s occupations?
Kotoko: They’re just the normal office worker and housewife. Did you want me to be born in with some unique circumstances?
In the translation there are two articles that stick out the most to me in reference to this information.
The one about the Bank Employee Impersonation scam where an elderly eighty year old woman was stalked and tricked into giving up a bank note for five hundred thousand yen or three thousand two hundred ninety four dollars and eight three cents in USD. The perpetrator of this crime was later identified as Mikio Oshii the person we see Kotoko jumping in Harrow and alluded to going to jump in Deep Cover.
I think it's possible and reasonable to speculate the first elderly woman that Mikio Oshii scammed was Kotoko's grandmother. Something that may have caused her to be interested in the case to begin with. I say first instead of second because it seems she was looking into it before the second case even occurred.
The second article referring to the fortieth victim of a "It's Me" Phone scam where a woman received a phone call from a man claiming to be their eldest son stating they'd been in an accident and needed money. Ultimately the man ended up scamming the woman out of a million yen. Stating that he'd been hospitalized due to the accident and needed the money he told her to deliver it to a train station which she did. That's another six thousand five hundred and eighty nine dollars and sixty-six cents gone.
Oh yeah Kotoko has an older brother and her mom is a housewife right? Huh... She implies that her family circumstances aren't unique through asking if we wanted her to be born under some unique circumstances. Yet, her life is a lot more interesting when you really look at everything laid out.
Her father is the sole earner of the household. Yet she goes to a top law university and managed to study martial arts from a young age. They're not rich like Mu's family but they're comfortably middle class at least. Yet this means a few scams like this and Kotoko's family would suddenly find it incredibly financially difficult to cover her university costs.
I asked Bunny about what her tuition costs would look like, and they stated,
Ok the amount I found for the University of Tokyo's law department was 804,000円 per year or $5298 per year
Then because I asked what the average office worker salary was.
kotoko uses the term 'kaishain' which is very generic 'office worker'/'company employee so as you said, lots of variation but this is apprently the average
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If we go by ungendered average (4,610,000 yen) then its roughly $30,000 per year
Meaning the amount of money that her family members could have possibly lost for these scams is over the amount of how much one year of tuition would cost her.
"How heavy “HARROW” “HARROW” Is the damage to get in the way of someone’s dream- I’ll gouge you out with my fangs."/ "How heavy “HARROW” “HARROW” If it damaged someone’s dream to the points of stopping it- I’ll gouge you out with my fangs."
Not having the money to cover your next year is a good enough reason for anyone to take a break. Whoa Gunsli you just spent the whole first segment of this explaining that people were harping on Kotoko having trauma too much but now you're speculating-
Well, I also said I talk about the things that interest me. The fact that Kotoko's family members could have suffered from financially exploitative scams by the people she jumped. Well, that's pretty damn interesting.
Especially when we take this interaction between her and Mikoto into consideration,
20/07/01
Mikoto: Hey, hey, Koto-chan. I’ve been thinking this ever since I first heard your name, but don’t you think the names “Mikoto” and “Kotoko” kinda sound like siblings?
Kotoko: No.
Mikoto: Don’t say that! Let’s get along well from here on as the Koto-Koto combo!
Kotoko: I’m not doing that.
It's incredibly funny to me personally to imagine Kotoko possibly just disliking Mikoto because he reminds her of her actual older brother with his careless and flippant behavior. Hell one of the bikes stolen could have actually been her older brothers. Yet, this also showcases that she may hold a great importance in her family. Be it found or through blood.
Something she's consistently shown to be committed to. She's the sort to want to protect her pack is the best way to put it. I don't even know if this can be considered trauma or being incredibly unlucky. This would also explain why she's so hypervigilant around others and standoffish when it comes to the other prisoners at first.
If she's used to being in a close proximity to scammers and conman of course she'd be suspicious from jump.
20/05/30
Mahiru: Hey, Kotoko-chan. There’s something that’s really been bugging me, so do you mind if I ask? ……how do you style yourself so well? Have you always dressed like that? But it also looks like something you’d wear for training. Do you play sport? Ah, or maybe some kind of martial arts?
Kotoko: ……you really are carefree. Everyone in here is a “murderer” right? Is this really the time to be asking questions like that?
Mahiru: Hmm, I guess so. That’s what they said. But nobody here seems particularly scary or anything, right? If I had to pick someone, then maybe you’re the scariest! Ah, wait, do you do like yoga or something?
Kotoko: ……I can’t tell if you’re making fun of me or are just an airhead.
It would also fall in line with her going by Es' word because even though she doesn't really have much faith in Es just the merit of Milgram as a system. Then she may recognize she's simply a bit oblivious when it comes to the behavior of other people, knows she isn't the best judge of these things, and doesn't want the responsibility in case she's wrong. Sure she's confident that she'll know evil when she sees it but living with the what if's is a bit more difficult when it's all on you. Ultimately this is purely speculative and the people she jumped could be completely uninvolved with her.
However, the reason I doubt that is because of this line in Harrow-
"Whose fault is it, This is getting ridiculous."
We're never really told whose she's looking for and why. It's fair to assume that it was the child murderer but she continues going even after taking care of him as we see in Deep Cover. So what the fuck is this line referring to?
Plus it would make sense if she was suddenly no longer financially able to go to college anymore. Kotoko doesn't show a disinterest in law. In fact though she scrutinizes the justice system her interest in it seems genuine. She probably had an interest in cleaning it up from the inside and since being in Milgram she's shown an interest in continuing her studies repeatedly. So, if that was the dream that was stopped then it'd make sense if due to Milgram she began to believe it was possible again.
Especially since she went from blatantly stating she dropped out in her first voice drama to stating she's just on leave because there's something else she wants to do right now in her first written interrogation.
Q.07 What did you study at university?
Kotoko: Technically, I’m studying law. I’m on a break right now because there’s something else I want to do, though.
This would also fall in line with her belief that once an offender always an offender. As she would have been there to witness how some people behave even if it wasn't her who was actively victimized by them and just people close to her. Something that would tie into her very defensive response to this question,
Q.18  Have you ever personally been persecuted in the past?
Kotoko: I haven’t. But are you trying to say that if you haven’t had those experiences you can’t hate evildoers?
Plus I feel it would explain why literally outside of the child murders everything else on her board is a petty crime. This could just be a tidbit meant to mirror how Haruka works his way up from animals to people. Yet I don't think so because Kotoko goes from taking out a serial killer to jumping a conman. It's also possible that Kotoko and the serial killer are related in some way. Maybe through the hit and run.
From the beginning of Harrow Kotoko is flashing to the memorial and call for information on the hit and run. That we later find out the person she kills is speculated of being responsible for as well. If Kotoko was a witness to the hit and run in some way she would have more reason to assume the worse of this guy. She would also know the lengths that people involved with this person had gone to in order to cover up his heinous behavior and enable him.
Making it more likely for her to believe that if he wasn't taken care of then and there he'd just end up getting another slap on the wrist again. Or basically that this was the only way of handling the situation.
However outside of all that what Kotoko says here could also be a simple case of projection. Where she believes that others can't change because she thinks she can't either. Note that in her answer she moves away from her usual wording of discussing things in terms of good and evil.
Instead stating,
"No way. Once a beast gets a taste for human flesh, it will always come back for seconds."
Despite the question only asking about wrongdoers not murderers she immediately jumps there by saying once a beast gets a taste of human flesh. Kotoko also very similarly to Mikoto fears that she is the beast or monster that she's trying to fight.
Plus, her very first glitched voice line is-
"This feels so good."
Making it likely that a bit of her own self-hatred is coming through with this answer. Making me interpret it as her going I can't stop so how would they be able to.
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Q.12 But aren’t 'your' actions an overstep of boundaries?
Kotoko: You were the one who chose to walk this path with me, aren’t you? I simply serve as a means to fulfill your wishes as a warden.
Remember when I said I was going to make some of these brief. I agree with Kotoko here. Like the audience supported her mindset. She put on full display she jumps criminals and she was in a place where others had already been judged as criminals. Before she was even on trial the others started showing signs of being viewed that way. I mean what can I say other than yeah the audience choose that. I didn't. I didn't vote on her first trial.
Like in the first half she's right. The second half she's lying. Like she hasn't even asked Es what they want her to do. Es is the warden. However, technically Kotoko does not consider Es to be the warden. She considers the audience to be the warden and Es to be just another prisoner being used as a proxy for the audience the real wardens. As shown through Deep Cover,
"“UNDER” Inept “011 Guard”"
And like some of the audience did want those people jumped. Hell, some celebrated them being jumped. So, like maybe we've wrapped back around to her just being right. Still I don't have much to say about this.
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Q.13 Was the person you killed evil?
Kotoko: Of course. I’ve investigated to the very end and confirmed every detail. It’s easier here since you’re the one who’s deciding who gets punished.
I believe in journalist Kotoko to be unbiased and fair. She is fair and just. No one would ever wrongfully report on an event in the music videos where it's put on fully display that news outlets cannot be trusted as one's sole source of information several different ways. In a series where the voice drama of the very second prisoner discusses the pitfalls of tabloids and news shows.
I don't believe her by the way.
I believe that she believes she researched it thoroughly. However, she did just attempt to jump four people solely based on the opinion of what appears to be a middle schooler. So, who's to say. Then ended this by saying it's easier now that she has said middle schooler here to decide who gets punished.
In fairness she could be referring to the audience but we all know how much we know. So, that's hardly any better. I'd feel safer if she was making the decisions herself actually and I know she's going to jump Mikoto if she does. Maybe they would just be in constant combat like Wile E Coyote and the Road Runner. Then at least everyone else would be good.
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Q.14 Don’t you feel a sense of isolation in your current situation?
Kotoko: It feels like nothing's changed. If the world gets even a little better just by me undertaking this isolation, then that is the role the strong play.
Hey, she's committed to being alone just like Mikoto is committed to that job. If the world can't change that's the world's problem you just keep doing you. Never introspect. If nothing has changed that really means the world hasn't gotten better or worse. Yet, you know maybe if you keep doing the same things over and over the outcome will change.
Also sidenote she wasn't really talking to anyone like that. Why would she mind the isolation like who does she miss. The one girl that's nice to her she put in a cast. She could go see her. Hell, she doesn't have any hard feelings about the jumping thing. She said so in her second voice drama. Kotoko does not have to be alone.
Mikoto even tried talking to her on her birthday. Shidou and Kazui tried to negotiate a ceasefire and have been since the first trial of trial two. People talk to her! Plus, they aren't really rude when she comes up and talks to them.
Literally everyone is over here like,
Kazui: Come join us in sin Kotoko.
Mikoto: Yeah come in the sin is fine~ Koto-koto duo!
Yuno: Come on a little sin never hurts- Do it just smile.
Mahiru: We're not so different- We could all get along if we try. Let's have fun!
Kotoko: ... (They’re still here, still here, it grates me.)
In Kotoko vision meanwhile they're all here in actuality like,
Yuno: Does she like want something?
Mahiru: Maybe she feels bad about what she did.
Shidou: ... Possibly. (Shiina is so hopeful. Though why is Yuzuriha-kun making growling noises...)
Kotoko: Sinful...all of them.
Amane: ???
Kazui and Mikoto aren't even here she's just still mad about them interfering.
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Q.15 Tell us the details of your promise with Haruka.
Kotoko: Looks like you’ve done your research. Well, it’s something I won’t go forward with myself. I do feel a bit disappointed about it though.
Look I've been writing this for two days and if I don't finish before her next question drops, I'm going to feel obligated to add that too. So, no lead up with this one.
The way this question is phrased heavily implies exactly what Haruka will be doing over the course of the intermission. Which will be killing our favorite good girl,
Yuno Kashiki.
Or at least attempting to. Kotoko expressly states that what Haruka is doing is something she wouldn't go forward with herself. The thing that Kotoko has taken a hard stance against is attacking the innocent or forgiven.
Something that Kotoko has repeatedly stated herself that she would not do,
Specifically in these instances.
22/08/05 (Kazui’s Birthday)
Kotoko: ……Mukuhara Kazui. Thanks to you, I wasn’t able to properly serve justice to those who did something unforgivable. I’m currently acting as an agent for our prison guard Es. Don’t get in my way next time.
Kazui: Oi oi, don’t be silly, Yuzuriha-chan. There’s no way I could just look away from your outrageous display of violence. Anyway, even disregarding the fact violence against those voted guilty isn’t a part of Milgram’s system, what you’re doing is just acting recklessly based on a broad interpretation. As long as I’m free myself, I’ll stop you.
Kotoko: ……what a pointless argument. Hmph. Since Es forgives you, I have no choice but to forgive you myself too. If you're to keep to your word, then you’d best do what you can to keep being forgiven. If you’re not, then next time you’ll be one of my targets.
Kazui: Oh, how scary. That girl truly is frightening. ……well then, I wonder what the guard will decide to do with me. That’s the one thing I really can’t make out. Honestly……
"Hurting the innocent through violence, taking from others, killing people... I can't stand it at all! There are too many cases of The Law being unable to deliver a verdict to sinning. Just by exploiting loopholes in the law, the sinners who have bullied and tortured the weak can still live out their lives unpunished! I want to change this world but I alone only have so much power!"
Q.20 What do you consider “evil”?
Kotoko: The persecution of the weak and innocent.
That's Kotoko's hard line she's not going to attack people who have been deemed innocent. Because she genuinely believes the persecution of the weak and innocent is wrong. We don't have to worry about Haruka attacking Amane because Kotoko said he's going to do something she wouldn't which she admitted she would have done that,
"Ah, about that... My apologies. I couldn't give enough pain to Kayano Mikoto and Momose Amane."
..! You..!
"I attacked everyone in order, but because of the interference caused by Kayano Mikoto and Mukuhara Kazui, who was protecting Kajiyama Fuuta, I couldn't finish it properly. But I was still able to do some damage. After attacking Shiina Mahiru, I had no time left for Momose Amane."
You've planned... on attacking Amane too?
"That's right. You haven't forgiven her, so wouldn't it be justified?"
But she's just a child...
"So what? This "child" is kept here because she murdered a person, isn't she?"
Right...
"You thought I won't attack her because of the young age? Sorry for disappointing you. It's all because of my lack of strength."
Whether Kotoko behaves this way because she genuinely believes hurting the innocent and weak is wrong or because she wants her actions to be justifiable in the eyes of the law is completely secondary. The point is this in fact tells us what Haruka is going to do through the process of elimination. We know all the things Kotoko would do and one thing that she wouldn't.
She basically just tells us without telling us. Now one could debate that Kotoko wouldn't harm herself either. So, that could still be all Haruka is going to do. Yeah, that'd be reasonable but there's also foreshadowing of him being jealous of Yuno and under the belief that she is the audiences favorite out of their pair.
Or the one who wound up getting the most attention. Including parallels between their trial two songs.
I just want to be your good boy-I will keep on killing to be a good boy/Caressing me with your “Good girl”- Who needs your self-righteous pardon?
Like she has what he wants and he bluntly states in his second trial interrogation-
Q.20 Did you hate the person you killed?
Haruka: I wonder if I did. I was jealous of them.
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Man I doubt Haruka would be jealous of the person who is right after him who has been innocent twice. It's not like he was already upset about the idea that the audience and Es would change his verdict this trial.
Meanwhile Yuno is over here like,
Yuno: They keep telling me what a good girl I am. How I've never done anything wrong and never could. Who needs that type of half-assed shit.
Haruka: *collapsed on the ground trying to reach a blunt object struggling for air* (It could have been me! I wanted to be the good one- I've been the good one! I've been practicing better communication and everything- She doesn't even want it!)
Yuno: Like really who do these people think they are? Who needs words like those filled to the brim with self-righteousness and demeaning assumptions. They're all so gross can't they just disappear. Innocent- Ugh, like shut up already nobody even asked for your opinion.
Haruka: *sustaining psychic damage on the ground sobbing* (SHE DOESN'T EVEN WANT IT SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOW GOOD SHE HAS IT!)
Though he could end up attacking any of the innocent prisoners. It doesn't have to be Yuno. So thanks for telling us it's at least something you wouldn't do yourself that really narrows it down. It's either that or he's attacking Shidou or Kazui. Though Haruka does specify he can kill anything smaller than him in his second voice drama and Yuno fits the description best out of those who have been consistently innocent.
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Q.16 Do you think there are the ‘weak’ among the other prisoners?
Kotoko: I’m sure there’s a lot. Those with weak wills will easily turn to evil. The only thing we can do is firmly instill the risk of turning to it.
So, the way this question was translated confused me and I ended up asking @doctorbunny what exactly was going on with it. This is what he said.
囚人の中に弱者いると思うか? shuujin no naka ni (Amongst the prisoners) jakusha iru (there are weak people/'the weak') to omou ka? (do you think) aka Do you think any of the prisoners are weaklings?
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A few questions ago Kotoko considered herself to be 強者/kyousha/a strong person
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Q.14 Don’t you feel a sense of isolation in your current situation?
Kotoko: It feels like nothings changed. If the world gets even a little better just by me undertaking this isolation, then that is the role the strong play.
This was the conclusion from this exchange based on the answer provided.
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Given that Kotoko stated she was sure there are a lot of weaklings amongst the prisoners. Then choose to elaborate stating that those with weak wills easily turn to evil. Causing the only thing we (in this case being Es and her the strong as she stated herself to be earlier in this interrogation) can only firmly instill the risk of turning to it.
This can only imply one thing that she punishes weaklings as well if they are at risk of turning to evil. Because she blatantly states that there are weaklings here within the prison and in her second trial song tells blatantly states that them still being here grates her and implies she'd like them to guilty. So, she recognizes they're weak and states that as why they turn to evil as well. So she's just saying the weak can be evil and deserve to be punished like anyone else to be dissuaded from doing evil.
People needing to be dissuaded from doing evil is a belief she was open about in her second voice drama Yonah.
"Es, look. Someone who committed a crime can only realise its severity through losing something. I've seen many criminals, but none of them would give way without pain." - "When a person who killed someone is met with violence, it's called "karmic retribution". Don't you have such a feeling?"
"If you sin, You need to do more than be atoned. It’s karma dude!"
This answer serves to further contextualize her second trial glitched voice line as well,
"From the beginning I've never asked for your understanding! My actions, one by one, are bringing Earth closer to peace. Useless Weaklings should just shut up and let me protect them!"
Kotoko basically came out and said the quiet part out loud. That she attacks weaklings too. At least if they're at risk of turning to evil or to dissuade them from it. Still given the phrasing of the question was difficult for me to grasp and I genuinely couldn't believe she would just say that I asked him to look into the answer too.
Again sorry Bunny for the inconvenience. At first, he came back with this,
たくさんいるでしょうね。takusan iru deshou ne. = There's a lot, [of prisoners who are weaklings] aren't there. 弱いではあぐ悪に転ぶ 。Yowai dewa agu(?) aku ni korobu. = 悪に転ぶリスクを不直え(??)付けるしかない。aku ni korobu risuku wo fu naoe tsukeru shikanai.
But ended up having to ask another party for help. Then came back with this later on.
OK so 囚人の中に弱者いると思うか?- shuujin no naka ni jakusha iru to omou ka? - Do you think any of the prisoners are weaklings? たくさんいるでしょうね。- takusan iru deshou ne - A lot of them are, aren't they. 弱い心はすぐ悪に転ぶ 。yowai kokoro wa sugu aku ni korobu - [people with] Weak minds/spirits readily turn to evil. 悪に転ぶリスクを植え付けるしかない - aku ni korobu risuku wo uetsukeru shikanai. - I have no choice but to instil the risks of turning to evil Weak one of these www
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So, that's the full breakdown of that.
Personally, I'd interpret the question and answer this way given all this-
Q.16 Do you think there are weak people amongst the prisoners?
Kotoko: A lot of them are, aren't they? Weak minds easily turn to doing evil. I have no choice but to instill the risks of resorting to such things.
So, she is bluntly stating that she reprimands the weak too in order to make sure that they resort to evil as well. Which, um I've been bringing up this line a lot but- Here it goes again.
"From the beginning I've never asked for your understanding! My actions, one by one, are bringing Earth closer to peace. Useless Weaklings should just shut up and let me protect them!"
So, it's not this is even new either. She'll punish the weak too. Why else would she be yelling this at someone she considers a weakling? This isn't really a friendly thing to yell and she didn't sound friendly when she yelled it either. I'm glad she established that with very little prompting... The second statement didn't even pertain to the fucking question. She just added that second part on. Kotoko I said this for Mikoto before his trial but girl shut the fuck up. Learn to lie by omission better and on paper. You did not have to fucking write that girl you didn't specify what the fuck Haruka was planning you were pretty vague then.
Why didn't you keep that fucking energy? Nobody fucking asked for an elaboration. You could have kept it to a simple yeah some people here are weak. Listen not everything has to be more than one sentence start leaving shit blank, start scribbling on the page.
(Star here- I think she's trying to be personable in a similar way to how she's tried with Es in both her voice dramas. However, not only is it detrimental to her case as a whole, it also gives off a way different vibe when written down instead of spoken.)
What Star typed is incredibly fair. I Just find it a bit funny because Kotoko that wasn't the question. You didn't have to add that. All I can say is at least Kotoko tends to be honest. Sometimes too honest if she really doesn't think the topic of discussion or her beliefs on it are a problem. I'm just a bit flabbergasted. Like why I don't understand. Why say that?
I just... Do I really have to say anything else about this it kind of speaks for itself. Well that's really all I have to say on that situation and these questions. So, yeah if you made it this far thanks for reading this to the end. These are just my thoughts on this and I hope that even if you don't like them some of what's here can at least help you understand where I'm coming from.
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achaotichuman · 6 months
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Witchy Tamlin has my heart because I got into witch lore be ause of my friend 😭😭😭
YES! I have thought about witchy Tamlin before! I have a ton of headcanons for him!
Starting with the Spring Court. I imagine it has the deepest connections to the earth, utilizing its power in their magic such as being able to grow and nurture any and all plant life. Having an incredibly close relationship to the local fauna, being able to easily connect with animals even if they are dangerous to anyone else who might come across them.
Because of the Spring Courts deep connection to the life from the ground, it has magic that reflects the balance of life and death. Such as being able to bring life back from death, but also being able to suck it away.
Then enter the High lord's power. It is derived directly from this balance of life and death. It controls the regulation of magic roaming throughout the Spring Court. As death and life are as chaotic as tossing a dozen coins in the air and trying to guess which side each will land on, if Spring magic is left to its own devices, it will choke itself out, go into a state of chaos and wreak havoc on its own lands.
So, the High lord's power is in place to establish law that even the magic heeds to. However, the magic still has some control and therefore if its ruler is not strong enough, say the magic was supposed to originally go to one person but then they were killed so it had to choose another, this second option may not quite meet the mark and therefore will find it even more difficult to keep their sanity whilst also controlling the fluctuation of magic throughout the lands.
But if the High lord is strong enough, the magic will allow the High lord to have his own way with it. Basically, like a magical fight within yourself and if you come out victorious, the magic will heed your word.
Enter Tamlin. Out of all of his brothers he was the chosen one for the magic. Now, his brothers wouldn't have been anything to laugh at, both of them made his life a living hell growing up, so they would have been powerful, strong and fierce. Perfect candidates for such a chaotic magic, who else better to tame an ancient power such as either of two powerful warriors? Considering they were older than Tamlin they may have even fought in the war, meaning they would be renowned throughout Prythian for their strength and honor.
Then there's Tamlin. Tamlin who will always fight against the forces of evil. Tamlin who plays a fiddle, a well-known poor-man's instrument. Tamlin who ran to the War Bands the first chance he got simply avoid his family. Tamlin who attracted the attention of the most powerful High lord on record (would have been to-be-most powerful High lord back then). Tamlin who had no diplomacy experience and wanted to run away with the circus.
Tamlin who also welcomed refugees into his Court. Tamlin who would've fought on the side of humans if he had been old enough during the War. Tamlin who stood up against a sadistic Faery Queen who had harassed him constantly since he was a child.
Tamlin would have been viewed as a spare son. A shadow in the corner that needed no further attention than dogs out in the kennels, another piece of the furniture. And I believe that is what would draw the magic to him.
His is the balance. I imagine Tamlin would sneak out it the middle of the night following the whistling of the wind which sounds like the harmonious strings of a violin. Following dirt paths deep into the dark forests but never being afraid of the danger he may face.
Creatures look at him with reddened eyes through the trees. He goes deeper and deeper until there is no village nor town for miles and miles. He hears the wailing of a Banshee, the call of creatures long forgotten, the Suriel prophesying on the wind.
He walks and he walks, and his loneliness weighs in on him, because he is lonely. He is outcasted and forgotten from his own family, and he finds it difficult to make friends, so he begins to talk. He speaks to the trees around him, to the leaves fluttering in the breeze. To the grass underfoot, to the daffodils and the lilac and the roses and the wisteria. He talks until his throat is raw and he cannot no longer speak a word.
Then the world speaks back to him. On whistling winds and from the hollows of trunks. From the pollen carried on the wind, through the roots sticking out of the ground. He feels the earth vibrate underneath him as it talks back to its chosen one.
And Tamlin stands there, lost in the nature of his Court. Eyes closed, head tilted up towards the silver full moon, listening to the stories carried on the wind that no one has listened to for far too long.
He continues to come back, and the forest tells him everything. It tells him of wars, of people who had died and now lived within the earth. It tells him when beneath his feet there laid a soldier as he took his last breath. It tells him the tree he passed by there used to sit a maiden burned in that very spot. The Fae and humans have forgotten her, but the earth never will.
It begins to teach him, molding him into the ruler the earth truly needs. It teaches him kindness, it teaches him spells to cast, it teaches him curses he can utter to those that harm him. It teaches him all it knows.
When most think of a witch, they think of an old crone wearing all black with wide-brimmed pointed hat, stirring a bubbling cauldron.
Little do they know; the witch can have smooth skin, piercing green eyes and long golden curls. Little do they know the witch can be a boy who was chosen for his kindness and his bravery.
I also imagine he has a stone basement beneath Rosehall where he dries out herbs, has a small cauldron that he whisks up potions in and trials spells. I bet he sits there in the silence with the wind travelling down from the outside to talk to him, and he listens while he cuts up ingredients to make a purple bubbly drink.
I imagine he has maps he lays on out on the floor, using sand he creates imagery on the stone and once created puffs of smoke emerge and faces appear. I imagine he gave the wind a face that he saw through the smokey darkness, he smiled at this face, and the face smiled back.
I love witchy Tam so, so much, if you couldn't tell lol. Please tell me any and all of your head canons for him!
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chamerionwrites · 7 months
Text
I've thought about making a post like this countless times over the years, and the problem I always stall out on is just...no one should have to plead for recognition of their humanity. And to plead for the recognition of someone else's humanity sometimes just feels like a further insult. As if even in doing it - no matter how heartfelt - you are merely feeding the system that values your words, your thoughts, your experiences so much more highly than theirs. Every time some atrocity is happening in full view of the world there's an outpouring of: look at the faces of these children, listen to the dreams of these students, hear the names and stories of people not so different from you. Sometimes that feels like witnessing. Sometimes it feels like another dehumanization. No one should have to offer so many proofs of personhood, for the world to gawk at and debate over and disregard.
Which is all to say that I struggle over whether it is meaningful, or even right, to offer emotion and experience in addition to actions and analysis.
But every time some atrocity happens in full view of the world, I wonder how many people have felt that frisson of recognition, watching a film and seeing the street they grew up on. It doesn't need to be the actual street. But the sum total of small sensory details - the angle and color of the light, the recycling bins by the curb, the shape of the fence posts, the accents of the neighbors - is so instantly and eerily familiar that it gives the story an extra layer of vivid realism. And I think about the time I had this experience wrt a place I once lived in and loved - not while watching a fictional story, but while watching a documentary about a genocide.
I think about hearing a recording played on the news, of small children sobbing so hard - you could hear it even audio-only - that they might be sick. And I remember thinking numbly that to many of the listeners that clip would be noise. ChildrenCrying.mp3. Heartrending in any language - but they would not understand the words, and they would not recognize the accent, and they certainly would not hear the same childish lisp over the exact same consonant as the neighbor's son who once fell asleep sitting in my lap, on a bus too crammed with passengers not to share seats.
I think about the breathless inhale I took, hearing reporters and officials wail and gnash their teeth over the sight of "blue-eyed" - direct quote - Ukrainian refugee children fleeing their homes. How extraordinary and appalling and unquestionably worthy of compassion that was considered. And I think about multiple funerals in a weekend, people holding their breath driving through checkpoints of masked soldiers, everyone with a story of Where They Were During The Coup, and how brown-eyed children fleeing state repression is considered neither remarkable nor even tragic, but as a crime.
I think about how gutting each of those moments was. How they felt and feel like moments that will stay with me forever. How maddening it is every time the world gives you some fresh proof of how little it values the lives of people you love, or of anyone else whose suffering is considered similarly unremarkable. And how my own secondhand rage and grief must be only a scratch on the surface of what it feels to be the person whose humanity is - not even questioned, but so often hardly considered at all.
I don't even know where to go from that but if the rage and grief is worth anything, there it is.
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