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strawberry-nugget · 3 years

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Oddly specific bnha headcanons

Characters: Deku, Bakugo, Kirishima, Kaminari, Jirou, All Might, Endeavor, Hawks, Dabi

A/N: I'm finally back from my mini hiatus and I finally finished a part of my never ending cursed head canons and I also hit a new milestone so I feel like you all deserve this attempt of mine at comedy for the love I've been getting...I'm also sorry, this is a wild ride, and as you're reading you might wonder why did I make these? And the answer is, simply, because I can 😭, no lol though true... I'm soft so if these made you laugh and you leave an LMAO comment I'll think about it forever uwu. I've talked about most of these with my dear friend @aichiin, who is an amazing artist whom should support in all platforms uwu bye

Warnings: some of this content is NSFW, 18+, so if you're under 18 DO NOT INTERACT

Disclaimer: everyone is at least of 18 years of age

• I can't explain why, and we've seen Endeavor texting shoto in canon but... I feel like probably his texts look like this: …..shoto why aren't you Answering your phone…

….tell fuyumi to make you soba… .

… ……are you still friends with that rude boy from school..

…I don't want any take out dont get any for me tell natsuo that I'm sorry and try to ask him if he's changed his mind about forgiving me.…

• All might opens a Facebook account a month before the beloved class graduates as his way to keep on touch with everyone after they're off to fight crime and lives his life as the ultimate Facebook mom and thinks he's texting people but apparently posting on your Facebook wall isn't texting. He has probably made a thousand posts asking midoriya how it works until people just, they just, accept it, I guess, there's nothing else they can do. He uses the Facebook mom tulip emoji and writes in all cap. Give him credit for being so sweet tho.

And probably it goes like this: "💞🥰🌷🤣WHAT AN AMAZING SUNDAY. GOOD MORNING YOUNG MIDORIYA HOW HAVE YOU BEEN" Ofc he will not hesitate to use all these emojis unironically, in fact, he doesn't know that is the ironic use of an emoji, leave him alone

(Comments on the post most probably go like this: Bakugo: I EXIST TOO YOU OLD HAG, FUCK YOU DEKU, I DIDN'T BRING YOU TO THIS WORLD BUT I SURE WILL TAKE YOU OUT. MOTHERFUCKER.

Denki: mister al mght do we have english tomorrow ?

Momo: @denki, no but we have literature, hello mister all might sir, have a nice day too

All might: YOUNG BAKUGO PLEASE WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE 🤣 YOUNG KAMINARI, AS YOUNG YAOYOROZU SAID YOU HAVE LITERATURE AFTER MY CLASS📜 HAVE A BEAUTIFUL EVENING YOUNG YAOYOROZU🌷

• I'm sorry for this but.... Midoriya, Denki and Kirishima probably lick their finger after they absolutely drill it in their noses but here's the deal

Midoriya inspects what he fished out like thoroughly, Denki dissociates while staring at it, and Kirishima does so straight out of his nose

• Someone told Shoto that Saiki K is based on true events and he genuinely believes it and tries to find Saiki K, claiming that he is the answer to all of his problems. Is very subtle about it tho.

• I think that in part one of these atrocious head canons we established that Keigo would willingly put effort to find the clit, right? Listen he probably asks what's the concept of the clit, like why is it outside and not inside- wait you have another spot inside, yeah? He's is so confused and for what? Won't stop for it mid sex but he searches reproduction organ anatomy later on on google because he brought some questions in his brain that need answers. On the clit. You heard me right.

• Dabi looks like he once had a break up that was so rough that he opened a Twitter just to drag the other person down. For once, I won't go into detail and will let your imaginations run wild.

• I have to do a a cursed one for Bakugo right? Well yeah uhm, he probably was caught flexing his muscles in the mirror during vacation, totally naked too, by one of his friends in his group and screamed in a high pitched voice and picked up that little hotel room fridge to cover himself up and chased them around the hotel room until he just crushed the poor item. To the floor? Because he tried to use it as a cover up and it just slipped... It's even worse if the friend was a potential s/o. He'll scream like one of the screaming/simping TikTok sounds.

• Bakugo also really hates chairs. Idk why I have this headcanon, but I know it in my heart that this man, as an adult, only has those round weird- ish IKEA stools around the kitchen table that's all. No more chairs. Nothing.

• this is too self indulgent but Kirishima and Deku look like the people who, while washing forks, spoons etc they create whole stories about them and treat them like characters, and others would just look at them so confused as to why it takes 16 minutes to wash off a spoon and why are they also crying but you wouldn't understand. This spoon is Cinderella. Back off and let. them. finish. their. stories.

• I feel like Jirou has phases where she only wants to wear black but then she sees a nice pair of jeans and buys it, and then buys some more and then she gets mad about having blue jeans and she dyes them, but then she grows out of that phase for a few months and she tries to find ways to make the fabric paint fade away

• I also think that she, after spending a little time with Momo, spends money on a lot of clothes, and it's not like Momo buys too many clothes, but Jirou always wants to upgrade her wardrobe and ends up feeling lost on what she wants to wear

• Denki and Kirishima turn into the same person a little more every single time they hang out together. You'll listen to Denki say 'manly' all the time and Kirishima starts trying to find leather jackets that look cool on him, and just adopts Dennis speaking habits.

#bnha #katsuki bakugou #bakugou x reader #bnha fanfiction #denki kaminari #kirishima x reader #eijirou kirishima #momo yaoyozoru #endeavor #dabi x reader #dabi #all might #mha #bnha fan fiction #bnha cursed heacanons

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scfttwice · 3 years

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f.a.q.

> in which jina answers and reacts to a few frequently asked questions on vlive.

jina has never really been that active on vlive, especially when it comes to doing solo ones. she knows very well that some of her members, like nayeon, momo, sana, and tzuyu, do them quite often. some surprise onces with a sudden vlive occasionally, like jihyo, dahyun, and chaeyoung. the remaining members, jeongyeon and mina, basically come on vlive once every blue moon. jina would consider herself to be in the same category as jihyo, dahyun, and chaeyoung. don't get her wrong, she loves interacting with her fans, but sometimes schedules get a tad bit too draining, so she can come onto vlive only every so often. it never hurts to pop up in the vlives of the others from time to time, though.

“dahyun-ssi, are you on vlive?” jina asked as she stepped out into the living room of the makane dorm, seeing dahyun sitting at the coffee table with her phone propped up against a potted plant on the table. the older girl pried her eyes away from the thousands of incoming comments on the screen to look at her fellow member. “i am! care to join me?” dahyun invited with a wide smile, jina taking not two seconds to rush across the room and plop down next to dahyun.

she waved to the fans on the other side of the phone screen. “hi, everyone!” she greeted cheerfully, watching as onces spammed the chat to welcome her. she couldn't help but grin at the sight, their fans were always so eager for the girls to do collaborative vlives.

after a moment of looking through the chat section, dahyun read out an english comment. “dahji best girls...ah, thank you, thank you,” she responded also in english, making jina beam with pride. although 'thank you' was such a common and simple phrase, she knew that her unnie's english was improving by the day. “5 tzuyu or 5-year-old tzuyu?” jina read out another comment, giggling softly at the silliness of the question. “i think 5-year-old tzuyu would be cute,” dahyun answered without hesitation and leaned closer towards jina, urging her to give her answer as well. “what about you, jina?”

jina bit the inside of her cheek as she thought it over. “well...5 tzuyu would be fun, but i'll go with 5-year-old tzuyu too. there's only one tzuyu for me,” she answered, but realized too late—only after she had said it—that it sounded much more affectionate than she intended it to. in an instant the vlive comments were flooded by the fans' reactions.

“aww!! tzuna is so cuteee <3”

“TZUNA IS MY OTP”

“tzuna forever wbk”

some of the comments read, making jina slowly shake her head. their fans were really something else. as dahyun laughed in amusement next to her, she thumped her head down onto the table to hide her embarrassment. “i regret coming here,” she muttered with a groan.

“i think that's enough of teasing our maknae,” nayeon remarked as she walked into the room and took a seat on the couch behind the two younger girls. “even though she fully deserves it,” she added quietly, masking it with a cough. “you guys are evil,” jina grumbled, before she lifted her head to shoot a glare in nayeon's way. the oldest member gave her a smile of feigned innocence in return.

the vlive of two became one of three when nayeon joined them. for a while, the girls seemed to have forgotten that they were live, as they got lost in a conversation among themselves. jina was pulled back to their audience when nayeon read out a comment.

“is it one butt or two butts?” the fan asked.

“what a weird question. of course there are two butts,” nayeon answered without much thought, as if it was the most obvious fact known to man. “what? no way,” jina disagreed. “it's one butt, but two butt cheeks.”

nayeon looked at her in disgust, and dahyun couldn't help but laugh as she witnessed the debate between the unnie and the maknae.

“doesn't that just mean it's two butts then?” nayeon disputed.

“no, collectively it's one butt. like how we have one nose but two nostrils,” jina rebutted.

“well what if it's two butts but one butthole?”

“that— that doesn't even make any sense?!”

jina and nayeon's debate went on for a little while more, until jihyo came in to join them. “what's nayeon and jina arguing about now?” she asked dahyun after sitting down on the couch next to nayeon. “the one butt or two butts question,” dahyun answered. “nayeon-unnie is being illogical,” jina complained to jihyo, earning herself a glare from nayeon. “jina is the one who's saying it's one instead of two! what do you think, jihyo?”

jihyo laughed and held both her hands up. “i don't want to be a part of this,” she said dismissively. “how about we just agree to disagree?” dahyun suggested in an attempt to achieve peace. nayeon was the first to comply, crossing her arms over her chest. “fine, but i still think i'm right,” she huffed, and jina stuck her tongue out at her. “ah, it almost feels like we have four maknaes,” jihyo joked.

nayeon left to head back to her own dorm soon after, leaving the three of them to do the vlive. “next comeback spoiler?” jihyo read out a comment. “a spoiler for our next comeback is that it's going to be amazing, so please give it lots of love once it comes out,” jina quickly answered with a proud smile and throwing in a wink at the end, making dahyun and jihyo burst out laughing. “smooth,” jihyo complimented. “but it's true. whatever we release, we worked hard on it with lots of love, so please show us love in return!”

among the comments of dissatisfied fans still wanting a spoiler from the girls, jina found an english comment. “please make a heart,” she read out, before making a heart with her hands. jihyo and dahyun, who had previously busied themselves with a conversation regarding their schedules, saw jina and decided to join in. the two of them held up half a hand heart each and connected them together.

nearing the end of the vlive, jihyo had left, and it was back to being just dahyun and jina. the two were mostly quiet then, just reading the comments from their viewers while one of their song's, like a fool, played on jina's phone in the background, and responding to only certain comments every now and then. jina ignored the ones asking her about her relationship with wayv's lucas—ever since a huge dating rumor about them broke out, it's been difficult for fans to believe that they're only best friends, and jina had grown tired of it at that point.

she also scrolled past any comments that were demanding to see the other members, having had seen too many of them before on her own previous vlive's. she didn't understand why the viewers couldn't just be grateful with whoever it was on the screen, or couldn't just leave the live if it wasn't done by their favorite member, rather than say such hurtful things. it was always “where's sana?” or “call nayeon” or “i want to see mina”, and sometimes, it made jina think, “am i not enough for them?”

when jina began noticing some comments in the chat section that were a bit too aggressive and/or rude for her liking, she gently tapped dahyun's leg under the table. the older girl turned to face the younger, who gave her a look that she understood well.

“once,” dahyun called out to gain the attention of their fans. “i think it's time for us to say goodbye for today. thank you for being with us for a while. and sorry we didn't really do anything fun.”

“we've been missing you guys a lot lately, so that's why some members would randomly go on vlive. and because we missed you, it was nice to hang out like this,” jina continued. “take care and goodbye!” the two girls waved goodbye and briefly scanned through the chat as their fans also bid them farewell, before dahyun pressed on the icon to end the call.

jina leaned back against the couch once the phone screen turned black, a soft sigh escaping her lips. “some of them can be too much sometimes.” dahyun shot her a sympathetic look, knowing what jina meant and understanding the draining feeling. “i know...but it's okay. there are still plenty of them who aren't like that,” she reassured. jina smiled weakly and nodded.

“yeah, there are still plenty of them who make it all worth it.”

moral of the story: be watchful of what you say to idols on vlive.

don't ask me what everyone is doing in the maknae dorm.

also this was actually the first scenario i've ever written for this au, so i was conflicted over posting it or not. it's here now though so i'm sorry if it's bad.

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