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e-dubbc11 · 4 months

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Bloodstains in the Snow

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.

Pairing: Billy Russo x F! Reader

Warnings: Violence, swear words (I think), little fluff.

Word Count: 1.5K-ish

Summary: After a late night job, Billy wanders through the snow, figuring out how he feels about you.

A/N: I wrote this pretty quick but I actually think it’s pretty good, maybe even one of the best things I’ve written. I love writing fluffy Billy but every once in awhile I really enjoy violent/unhinged/unapologetic Billy. But he’s still soft for the person he loves. I hope you like it and hope you all enjoy your holiday season! ♥️

As always, thank you for reading! I appreciate it so much and comments, reblogs are welcome and encouraged. Don’t be shy to tell me your favorite part. 💕💕 💕

The late night city sounds were muffled by the heavy flakes of snow as they fluttered quickly to the ground. After the job was finished, he just wandered along the sidewalk looking down at what looked like a carpet of cotton beneath his feet.

His leather and black shearling coat collar pulled up to block the snow from touching the hot skin of his neck and his black beanie covered his ears to protect him from the savage wind that assaulted him from all directions.

He closed his eyes and remembered how much blood was spilled tonight.

He passed bar patrons that had ducked outside quickly for a few drags on their cigarettes before running back inside to get away from the bitter cold.

The scent of ash mixed with the fresh scent of the snow occupied his sense of smell even after he walked past that strip of bars. Stifled music coming from inside the bars was only clear when someone would open the door and muted again once the doors were closed.

Sometimes the desert overseas would get cold at night, but it would never get New York City winter cold. Blood looked brighter against the colorless shroud of snow than on top of the desert sands but spilled blood was spilled blood and it all came from the same source…evil.

Overseas, he spent some nights trying not to die and he flirted with death on more than one occasion. He had wondered if he would die never knowing what it’s like to be truly loved by someone and would he ever have what his best friend Frank had…a loving wife and kids.

“Only the dead have seen the end of war” and Billy Russo wouldn’t go down without fighting. He had done it his entire life…he was a survivor and a fighter. He fought for his life and for his country in wars at home and war overseas but he still didn’t know if he was worthy of love.

If he deserved love, then why did she leave him? Why did she abandon him? He was just a little boy. Did she love him at all? He didn’t know the answer to that and he would never know. Now, he wondered if anyone could love him for who he really is, even with all the things he has done.

Maybe you could be the one to love him.

The picturesque snow drifts were a perfect white under the glow of the city street lamps, his mind then flashed to ribbons of red running through the snow cradling the bodies of the would-be assassins. They had come for the state representative Billy and his team were protecting.

His last thoughts had been of you when he had the large arms of a mob boss wrapped tightly around his neck before Frank put a bullet in between his eyes.

Billy didn’t think twice about killing them all, no regard for any of their lives. He didn’t know if any of them had families or children and he didn’t care. All he knew was he had a job to do and he wanted to go home to you.

The goon had said something in Billy’s ear that caused his muscles to stiffen and his face to flush with rage. “You gotta real pretty girl, Russo. After we’re done with you, we’ll pay her a visit at your penthouse.”

They had threatened you.

It wouldn’t have bothered him if he wasn’t attached to you like he was. Billy was very much in love with you although he didn’t realize he was until your life was endangered.

What if they had taken you away from him? He couldn’t live with himself if that happened. Billy Russo didn’t lose fights and he would fight off the entire world just so he wouldn’t lose you.

The hollow cold stung his lungs as he inhaled the mid-winter air and let out a long exhale when he glanced down at the blood on his hands from the scum who’s throat he had just ripped out. Blood poured out quickly; it could not be contained. That man was now lying in the snow gasping for air he would never get. Billy saw nothing but red until they were all dead.

The rage burned like white hot fire in his veins as he sliced them all from groin to sternum, spilling their insides, disrupting the blanket of white underneath them and then it was over.

A devilish grin extended across Billy’s mouth, his doll-like eyes shined against the stark white snow as he watched their lives fade away forever into the cold; he enjoyed killing even though he knew he shouldn’t.

As he continued to walk against the powerful wind, his lips curled up into a slight smile. You were safe and warm back at his penthouse…probably sound asleep.

Billy didn’t want to think about it but he wondered what it would be like if he never got to sleep next to you again, or you reaching for his shirt collar in your sleep so you could nuzzle into the crook of his neck to keep your nose from getting cold.

When he had nightmares, you didn’t get scared. You were only scared for him and hoped you were doing enough to comfort him. It was more than anyone else had done for him and he welcomed it.

But what if he never got to hear you laugh or see your beautiful smile again? He was never going to give those up; he was never going to give YOU up. Billy started to walk faster into the large snowflakes falling quickly from the sky toward Anvil to get his car.

The walk to clear his head was done and he was ready to go home.

Finally, he was inside the car and out of the smothering cold, he looked at his hands as they grasped the steering wheel. Wind burned and blood stained, it was difficult to not look at them as he carefully drove home.

The snow-covered streets were nearly empty as the clock on the dashboard flashed 2 AM; he drove slowly, being extra careful not to slip and slide all over the road. Billy didn’t survive a night of mob bosses and thugs just to be taken out in a car accident.

When Billy arrived home, he inhaled sharply, unlocked the door and stepped inside. As he closed the door behind him, he exhaled forcefully and removed his boots.

The chill in his bones lingered until the hot water from the shower pelted against his skin, and the scent of your shampoo still hung inside the confines of the shower doors. It was silly but he loved to wash your hair and his mouth went tight with anger when he realized he didn’t get to do that for you tonight.

His tension eased however when he remembered that because you were safe, he would be able to do it the next time. It took a little effort but Billy removed the blood from his hands and from underneath his fingernails; they returned to their normal color and his long skilled fingers, along with the rest of his body, were no longer cold.

He could not wait to hold you.

The soft orange glow of the salt lamp illuminated your face just enough for Billy to see you were fast asleep. You stirred slightly when he pulled the blanket back and let a low whimper escape your lips as he carefully inched closer; he did not want to disturb your sleep.

You were wearing one of his old Marines t-shirts when he reached for you, his hands slipped under the blanket to touch your bare thigh, and your warm skin was soft from the lotion you applied earlier.

The tip of your nose touched the base of Billy’s neck and you wrapped your fingers around the collar of his shirt. The bristles of his beard brushed your shoulder as he pressed his lips against you.

He had never been more relieved to be home.

“I don’t deserve you, sweet girl. The things I’ve done…” He said in barely more than a whisper.

But he did. Billy did deserve to be loved, he was worthy of the love he craved and desired. He had to fight and kill to survive, to live; that didn’t make him a bad person. And now he had another reason to do what he does best…for love.

He did love you, he was sure of it now. “I love you.” Said Billy, softly against your ear.

And you loved him.

As long as there are men like that out there, Billy will always have a war to fight. He will make it his mission to destroy any evil that could take away the love he’s wanted his entire life.

As the snow continued to fall outside your window, the dreamlike picture below outshined the carnage shed outside on the streets tonight.

The tomb-like silence was music to his ears as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep while the blanket of white piled up high, cloaking the red stains left behind. “They won’t be missed.” He said to himself.

“Only the dead have seen the end of war.” -Plato

Tag List: @wheresthesunshinesblog @rafaelakelley @idaoftheburningmind @snowkestrel @fakehappy27 @music-indie-tv @fictional-hooman @kayhi808 @munsonownsmyass @gijos @celestialams @k-marzolf @nutmeg17 @rosaleenablack @vaguekayla @qu1etwolf @danzer8705 @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes

Others that might enjoy: @itwasthereaminuteago @fluffyprettykitty @jvanilly @imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend

If you’d like to be added (or removed from) my tag list(s) for the ever so handsome Billy Russo, just let me know and thank you again for reading! 💕💕💕 If I tagged you but you didn’t want to be, just let me know and I’ll never do it again.

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo fanfic #billy russo imagine #billy russo x female reader #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n

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writeandsurvive · 3 months

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Could I request a Vince from Fire Country x female reader, where they are in a secret relationship as she is a convict, and is the fire fighter program, obviously Vince and Sharon are divorced, with the prompt 1 and 29? Please and thank you

This is my first Vince Leone fic and I hope I did a good job 🥺 So much love for Vince/Billy, he deserves the best❤️

Warnings: inmate!Reader, forbidden relationship, punch, fire fighting

1. I’m afraid I can no longer remain professional.

29. I wish we could stay like this forever

Stay Like This ~ Vince Leone

Vince Leone’s first thought when he saw you, was how a gorgeous woman like you with an angelic face can be an inmate? If you had been wearing an orange jumpsuit, he’d have thought you were someone working at Three Rock, or perhaps visiting someone. But no, you were indeed in prison and he felt stupid. What demons were behind this angelic facade? What have you done?

The first time you and Vince actually worked together, he was surprised to see how much work you did. You weren’t scared of hard work, understanding the urgency of the situations, how every second counts. As a Department Chief of Cal Fire, Vince Leone has very high expectations when it comes to his firefighters and he simply wished you were one of his. On the other hand, you didn’t really pay attention to the Chief, but rather focused on your tasks, listening to every order Captain Manny Perez was giving you. You couldn’t let the fire win.

The second time was at Three Rock. Vince was visiting his son Bode in the evening and as he was waiting outside, he saw you going from the showers to the female lockup. “Hi sir,” you simply said, walking past him. He only nodded at first, but called out your name a few seconds later, making you spin.

“I just wanted to let you know that you’re doing a great job. Makes me wonder if you had some sort of training?”

You shyly smiled, “No more training than what we learned here.”

“Well, that’s impressive. Keep it that way,”

“I’ll try my best, thank you.”

From that moment, you started to develop a crush on Vince Leone. Maybe it was the way he complimented you, or his smile, or his handsome face, his hair, his mustache. Probably all of the above.

You weren’t sure when things took a turn. Maybe it was when Vince caught you before you fell from a cliff and held your body pretty tight against his, or maybe it was when you stayed by his side as he was stuck under some rubbles after a whole building collapsed. “I can’t, Chief, I can’t,” you cried out of exhaustion, fear and frustration as you tried to move the huge piece of rubbles he was under.

“It’s okay, we’re gonna figure this out, yes?”

“I don’t–I, I’m sorry. What can I do?”

“Not let me die in there?” he chuckled, trying to get you to stop panicking.

“Vince!” you shouted, not laughing and looking around for a solution.

“I’m Vince, now?”

“I’m sorry, Chief, I just–”

“You can call me anything you want. Except in front of the others, of course.”

“Do you really want to talk about that, now?” you exclaimed.

“Well I wouldn’t mind the distraction until the forklift gets me out of here. Please?”

You talked for several minutes about everything and nothing. He told you a bit about Bode, his passion for the job and music. He even mentioned Riley at some point but didn’t dwell on it. Knowing from Bode what happened to Riley, you weren’t surprised. You told him why you were in jail and how long you still had, where you were from originally, your family. You told him you’ve been playing violin since you were a kid, and he immediately said he wanted to hear you play.

“Only if you’ll play guitar and sing for me.” you answered.

“Deal.”

Vince never imagined being in a serious relationship after his divorce. After Riley’s death and Bode’s departure, his marriage imploded and so did his heart. So of course, a relationship was out of the question. He never wanted to fall in love again. But he found himself falling for a younger inmate. “Way to go, Leone.” he mumbled to himself once he came to the realization of his feelings for you.

If you put this on paper, the relationship was meant to fail. Both you and Vince actually thought so without saying it out loud. However, you just couldn’t stay away from each other. Vince would sneak into Three Rock every time he could, even if it was for a quick hello and a kiss. You’d talk almost everyday over the phone, whether you saw each other or not. Most of the time you were in the field, Vince would find a way to steal from Manny’s, so you were under his command, and right next to him.

However, one day you found yourself lost and surrounded by fire with one of Vince’s firefighters. You really thought it was the end for you, that you were going to burn alive. And your only thoughts were for Vince. You were silently begging him to save you, promising him the perfect relationship once you were free. The guy you were with was panicking too, and taking it out on you.

When you heard Vince’s voice and started to feel some water, you fell on your knees, crying like a baby. You didn’t know how long you stayed like this, only that Vince picked you up. You held onto him like never before and he held you tight. “You’re okay, baby. I got you.” Maybe some people overheard and noticed things but it didn’t matter at this very moment.

Shortly after, Manny was holding you as you saw Vince punching the hell out of his firefighter. “How irresponsible are you!” He shouted, “That was not my order! Not only did you put yourself in danger but you put–her in danger too. We will discuss this.”

As much as his anger was justified, the punch wasn’t and Vince found himself in some troubles with his superiors. You felt extremely guilty because you knew you were the reason Vince punched the guy. Overtime, you’ve found ways to meet with the man you love; a small distance away from where you sleep.

You were sitting in the grass when you felt two hands on your shoulders which made you jump. “I'm sorry honey,” Vince said softly, sitting next to you. “You usually hear my footsteps.” he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, his other hand cradling your cheek, and you kissed softly.

“I was deep in thoughts.” You admitted, resting your head on his shoulder.

“Wanna share?” He asked.

“Are you in trouble, V?” You looked at him, worried.

He sighed before answering, “Kinda, but it'll be alright.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I know you punched him because of me and I–”

“You're right. I was freaking out because I thought I was going to lose you, and I should have had a better control of my emotions.” He kissed your forehead. “Don't feel guilty, baby. I'm afraid I can no longer remain professional.” He admitted. “I think it'll be better if from now on, you stick with Manny.”

You nodded to that, but felt extremely sad. It wasn't like you and Vince had a lot of time together, and even though it was work and you were fighting fire, being under his command was when you two were able to be together the most. And this was going away.

“Hey,” he grabbed your chin to make you look at him, knowing what was going through your mind. “You only have 8 months. After that, we'll be able to see each other whenever the hell we want.”

“You deserve better, Vince.” You whispered, tears forming in your eyes.

“Don't ever say that again. I love you, I wanna be with you, no matter what. You brought me back to life.”

Since it was summer, the night weather was actually better than during the day. Vince laid down on the grass, taking you with him. He was holding close to him, while your head rested on his chest. Staring at the sky and stars, you stayed like this for a long moment. “You're the best thing that ever happened to me, Vince Leone. I wanna be a better person for you.”

“You already are, not that you were a bad person in the first place.”

“I wish we could stay like this forever.” You said after a beat.

“Soon my love, we'll have forever.”

#fire country #fire country fanfics #fire country imagines #vince leone #vince leone x reader #vince leone fanfic #vince leone imagines #billy burke

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lovebillyhargrove · 9 months

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Slow burn. Season 1 Steve Harrington meets asshole Billy Hargrove. Fire on fire, leading to an explosion. First chapter of this whole idea where there are definitely gonna be casualties

On ao3 "Wake me up when July is around"

Chapter 1/?

***

Fuck this stupid fucking Hawkins. What in fucking hell has he done to deserve it? Who the fuck moves away from California to a shit hole like this??

No one, apparently, except for his dad.

There are a lot of things about Neil Hargrove he finds weird. But the strangest one? Neil never fucking cared about the ocean. Billy doesn't remember a single time when his dad actually went to the beach, with or without his son. How can you not go to the beach if it's right there, on your doorstep?

Fucking insane.

The only thing Neil has ever cared about is being a respectable member of the community. Don't stick your head up too high, or you might get it chopped off. Be like everyone else.

If that's what being an adult is, Billy would rather die young.

Fuck this shit. Fuck this lame town. Fuck his life.

His hands are itching to turn the ignition key and drive away without looking back right this fucking second, but Billy needs to finish school first. He also needs some money and to turn 18. He knows that, he's not a fool.

This year's gonna be such a drag.

His father is a mechanic, and a good one. They lived in the suburbs of San Diego, where his father worked for many years at the Marine Corps Air Station in Miramar. Billy isn't sure if he counted as military or not, maybe he was just a mechanic who worked on a military base on a contract. But it seems that they paid him a good amount of dough when he quit. Or when he was made redundant, his dad didn't bother to fill Billy in on the details.

Parents never tell their kids anything, they never fucking explain. Like kids are so dumb, they won't understand adult stuff anyways. But then they go and demand from children to be mature at the age of fucking four. Be a man, his dad always says. Billy has been listening to this phrase ever since he got out of diapers. He's pretty sure he heard it before as well, it just didn't register on his level of understanding. Be a man. Respect and responsibility alright, but, somehow, it's supposed to go only one way. Kids don't have to be respected.

What a bunch of crap.

We're moving, son, that's it. Whether you like it or not, whether you want it or not. Us adults make decisions, and you just have to swallow everything down, not have your own opinion, go pack your bag and help Susan. Put all the furniture in the van, come on, chop the fucking chop.

Billy remembers how his father took him to the Miramar base when he was little. Billy, of course, was impressed. Huge planes and helicopters, he'd even dreamt of becoming a pilot one day. He'd fly away, and find his mom, and they'd live on a deserted beach without the bad people.

As he grew older, he realized how naive and childish his dream was. He also understood quite quickly that he did not like anything connected with the army and the military. Always live by someone's orders? His whole fucking life, until retirement? No thank you, sir. He had enough of this coming from his dad. Billy was actually more interested in traveling to different places once he grew up, he craved the sense of freedom. Of going anywhere. Around the States, he's always wanted to drive to the Atlantic. Or Mexico, where, they say, the beaches are fucking brilliant. Or South America. The world is fucking huge, so why the hell not?

Not to Hawkins, Indiana, obviously, but here he is. Stuck in cow shit. Waiting for his stepsister to come out of the house so that he can drive them both to school.

Billy wasn't impressed with the military stuff, but he himself was good with his hands. Must've taken after his father. He enjoyed it too. Which was surprising because initially it was Neil who taught him a lot about mechanics. Very quickly, this father-and-son time has become a burden for Billy, a suffocating chore he didn't want to do anymore. Because it was constant pressure. It was constant dissatisfaction, even contempt. His dad was never happy, even about little things, like tightening a loose screw. It's not like that. You did it wrong there. You could have done a better job, do you hear me, son? The son himself could've turned out much better generally as well, Billy already got the basic idea.

Sorry, dad. For being the way I am.

Billy has been hanging out at this garage near his house since he was little. Learned a lot there too. When he was fourteen, he brought a crashed blue 1979 Chevrolet Camaro Z28, which he found at a junkyard, to that same repair shop. He remembered almost losing his mind when he saw that beauty, just standing there, waiting to be towed away for scrap, to be crushed, sent into non-existence. Irreparable damages. Fuck no. It was his car now. The guys at the garage were kinda taken away by the determination of a 14-year-old. They helped, a lot. Billy spent all his savings on that car, working on it practically every day for months. It was a lot of work, and Billy enjoyed every bit of it. He also tried applying for a driver's license at 14, claiming he had no other option of getting to school, of course it was such transparent bull, his application got rejected at first. He then begged Neil to help him. His dad did, used his military connections. At 15 and a half Billy was already behind the wheel of his super dope car.

As soon as Billy got his own car, Max was handed over to him, hanging like a concrete slab around his neck. Take her there and there, pick her up, wait for her. Be very careful when you drive. Do not ever exceed the speed limit. Personal chauffeur, damn it. No complaints allowed.

Billy put two and two together and figured out pretty quickly why his dad had been so eager to help with getting that license.

Max? She has always been the privileged one since the day she appeared in his life. Max became and still was his unwanted responsibility. He was doing fine, being an only child, and then one day, he got a fucking sister he never asked for.

His father married this colourless shadow of a woman, Susan, four years ago, and then, when Neil's job was over, they decided to move to the ass of the world, a nowhere town called Hawkins, cause Susan is from Indiana, and some of her relatives still live around here somewhere. Apparently, Susan had fallen in love a long time ago, moved to California, had this red-haired misunderstanding, then something had gone wrong, as with most marriages. But with Neil, it actually went right. Four years and counting, of this mind-numbing righteousness. The jury is still out on that though, but these two seem to fit together, both so boring and ceremonious, and with baggage in the form of children from previous relationships. It's hard to find a match with a kid hanging around your neck. Susan and Neil are trying. To build a fucking family.

So after Susan's brainwashing, Neil found some work here, in this joke of a town, on a farm or something, and off the whole family joyfully went.

Billy is taking a long drag of his Marlboro. It's a bit chilly this morning but, he must admit, it's not unpleasant. Although he already misses the sun like crazy.

Where the fuck is Max? They are fucking gonna be late for school on their first fucking day, for fuck's sake.

Billy suspected it wasn't that easy with Max's dad. Maybe she missed him. Maybe he was an asshole to Susan, just like his dad was to his mom. Divorce is never easy, and it hits kids the hardest. But Billy was jealous. Susan took Max with her. Unlike Billy's mom who bailed and left him with Neil. Why, Mom? Billy wasn't little anymore, he understood why.

But like a fucking toddler, he was jealous, of Max. His mother didn't want him.

They still don't know the whole truth about this idiotic move. Billy bets Max thinks it's because Neil wants his son to be as far from California as possible. It's stupid. His mom left without a trace, why resurface after so many years? That's not a threat. Billy's money on the opposite idea - Max's father could be involved in that shit. Maybe Susan wanted to tear all strings with that man.

Maybe not. Billy really doesn't give a flying fuck.

One year, that's it, then Billy can leave wherever his eyes take him. University on scholarship, very possible. Has to study hard, of course, and he can when he wants it... Maybe a gap year. Maybe just a job, in that same garage in San Diego, why not, really?

He just needs to fucking leave. He doesn't owe anyone shit. Well, we do owe, as his father always tells him. Life is full of responsibilities, that's real.

Mom left him. She didn't and doesn't owe anything to anyone. She probably had this in mind when she ran.

If Billy is really honest, it's all crap. We do owe, if we love someone. Or if someone is just close to you. He hates to agree with Neil, but sometimes he does.

Mom. Mom is his pain, and only his. No one cares about this, and no one needs to. No-one has to know. Everything is clear as the brightest daylight. Only this voiceless Susan wouldn't run away from Neil. Billy noticed that Susan's eyes are always cast down when Neil's at it with him. She avoids looking, like if she doesn't look, she doesn't have to deal with it, that's not her problem. She doesn't see the problem.

Maybe that's her secret. Cause living with Neil is truly unbearable. All brains will be thoroughly fucked by his dull moral teachings. With Billy's mom? It sure didn't work out. She tried though, for eight fucking years. It couldn't have worked out between Neil and her.

Billy remembers, Neil was so angry and jealous too. She must've found somebody else.

Billy understands it. It's just that, why have a child, a question for all of you responsible fucking adults? Was it really necessary to have him? They shouldn't have had him. What the fuck for? Only to quit? To abandon your kid? Leave him all alone in the house with Neil fucking Hargrove?

Yeah, Neil didn't quit on him. Thanks for that, I guess, Dad. I'd really appreciate it if you were less of an asshole, but that's probably on me. Uh-oh, the son turned out completely wrong.

Billy would, truly appreciate the fact that Neil hadn't abandoned him, if his father hadn't drained Billy's whole soul during all these years.

It was a fucking dick move to bring Billy into the world, like, no-one benefitted from it. Fucking useless.

Billy knows he won't have children. Well, maybe, but only in the distant, faraway future. Kids are actually cool, and Billy always pities them with his whole turned-out-not-the-way-we-wanted heart. Adults generally don't give a shit what the kids think or feel. They just use them, for... literally for anything. Own ambitions, exaggerated expectations, an outlet for frustration and aggression. Money. The sense of being in power. Dump it all on the kids, they are resilient. They'll adapt, everything is fine. They'll manage.

If Billy ever, ever, gets a little creature to raise, then he will definitely never leave them. Maybe he won't marry at all. If everything goes well, he might take a kid from an orphanage when he's like... 40 or something. He can be a single father, why not? Relationships are overrated. Marriage is overrated. Love is mostly bullshit, people fuck and have kids, then they run from their children like from the plague. Very few actually care about kids. In these seldom cases, the little motherfuckers have hit the jackpot.

Billy has always liked kids. Little ones, not the obnoxious teens like Max. The worst age, for fuck’s sake. No, the little kids who look at the world with wide open eyes and say the most honest shit there is. Still unbroken. Still happy, even if they've already seen that life's fucking unfair. Even if the world has shown them its ugly face, but they still somehow believe it.

Okay, what the fuck, enough with that cesspool of sadness, what's wrong with him. It's fucking pathetic.

It's probably just the first day in a new place, the nerves are acting up. Well, they've already been here a week, but it's the new school day, so.

He'll just have to hold out for a year here, fuck, it's only nine months basically, and then beat it, dust under the tires, miles away from his dad.

Dammit, is Max going to school today or not? Neil has already left for work, so there's no harm in showing a little disrespect. Billy honks the car horn couple of times, out of irritation.

Finally, Max rolls out of the house, thank fuck for that. Red-haired monster.

She jumps into the passenger's seat, like it wasn't on her.

"Mom was packing lunch!"

"Mom? Lunch? Well, hold on then, you dimwit. It's gonna be your fault."

Billy calmly drives away from the house to a safe distance and then floors the gas pedal, not without a tinge of pleasure. Makes the music louder, Scorpions are so good this fine morning. Let's fucking go.

He hears Max shrieking something like, "Billy, are you nuts?!? We're gonna crash!"

Same old, every goddamn time. Like Max really thinks Billy's gonna slow down if she's hollering like the chickenshit that she is. He's just gonna go faster.

"You should've packed your stupid lunch quicker. Now we're gonna be late because of you. And don't even think of ratting me out to the parents for speeding."

Max pouts and shuts up. She only clings to the safety belt, as if it would help her if they crashed for real. They won't. Billy knows his car like the back of his hand and he is an excellent driver. Driving and cars are two things that he's pretty good at.

Billy also likes basketball. Dribbling that ball, blood pumping, shoving other guys' sweaty lean bodies around the pitch, the euphoria of scoring.

And he has... well, had a great surfboard. Left it at a friend's place back in Cali, the fuck he was gonna do with a board in Hawkins, fucking Indiana. The friend promised not to use it too much but to take it out for a spin occasionally. He put in the garage, told Billy to come back for it. With god's help, Billy will surf on it again one day.

That's like his best friend, Nick. They've known each other for ages. Billy sometimes caught himself thinking that he would probably try something with Nick. Something like fooling around, in bed, that is. Billy thought about it a couple of times when they were stoned as fuck, sitting on the floor of Nick's bedroom. But Nick had a girlfriend since forever. Like real love and everything. And Billy respected that. Also like... Billy isn't stupid. There is no need to throw sex into the mix with good friendship. Now with the new school starting, everything will get going, he should call Nick, tell him how fucking lame it is here, ask how things are back in San Diego.

Billy wonders if they have some good weed here. There is a plastic bag at the bottom of his suitcase, under all his clothes. Nick gave it to him as a parting gift. Not to go completely off the rails with boredom here.

Drugs? Billy saw what drugs do to people. No, thanks. He smokes weed, but that's it. Well, he has tried molly a couple of times they went to big events with a crowd, but anyway, it's a fucking slippery slope, so no.

Alcohol, cigarettes, weed, sex when it's available. Driving his baby around which makes him feel alive. Working out. No surfing here obviously, but he's already signed up for the school basketball team.

Without all this maddening pressure from his dad and his heavy hand, Billy's life wouldn’t actually be so bad.

In California. Here it's gonna suck ass.

At the bottom of the suitcase there are also magazines, the latest issues. Not only the latest ones, but also those that he especially likes.

And if he has a couple of another kind of mags lying around under ordinary Playboys, then this is only his business. His father would kill him on the spot, no doubt about that, if he ever found out. But Neil didn't even welcome girls. Called them all whores anyways, like Billy wasn't even able to find anyone good.

First you need to get an education, son, decide on a job, and only then date a respectable girl, blah blah blah. Well, he's basically right about getting a job and stuff. Like...a relationship is at the bottom of Billy's priority list right now. Hell, it's not even on the list.

So Billy would bring a girl home only if he knew for sure that his father was not there and would not be for a long time. Billy couldn't even imagine what would happen if he brought a guy home. Ohh what a shitshow it would be. It'd definitely end up being a crime scene with the police and that yellow tape.

There is also Susan. And Max, the fucking snitch. Yeah, fuck it. At least masturbation to any kind of magazines won't bring him unwanted problems.

Also, if you do bring a girl home and they catch you, you'll end up answering all these annoying questions. What and who, what's her name and who are the parents... Who the fuck cares who her parents are. What were you doing there in your room, Billy? We were listening to music and holding hands, for fuck’s sake, Dad, leave me alone. Nope. Leave me alone - that's a very wrong thing to say to his father. Billy will immediately get smacked on the lips for such disrespect. Or worse.

Billy takes out another cigarette and lights up. Well, here's the new school. He drove so fast, they got here in under seven minutes. Of course, upon approaching the parking lot, he had to slow down, one of his most favourite songs blasting through the speakers.

Fucking hell, Billy still can't believe he ended up in this godforsaken swamp of a town. He misses his life back in Cali, he was doing so good there. It's gonna be a hell of a long year.

"Don't be late after school or you're skating home."

Max doesn't even say thank you for the ride, just bangs the door. What a spoiled little brat. Billy hates it when she does that, he hates that she gets away with it, she gets away with fucking everything. Next time she slams the door of his car, he's gonna teach her not to ever do it again.

He sets his boot on the ground. Heavy. Like his fucking heart.

Max is off to the middle school.

Billy is scanning the parking lot. Everything looks ordinary, everyone is busy with their own stuff. Most of the cars are the boring usual, but a couple catch his eye... That BMW over there looks interesting, apparently, someone got lucky with a rich daddy. That must be the rich kid, in a striped polo, bleh. He eats money for breakfast, it's so obvious. Staring at Billy like he's just seen Jesus descending from the clouds. What a dumb bitch. He must be the hottest one around here. Hairstyle and all that, a girl hanging on his arm. Surrounded by the court of jesters and such. Billy fucking hates rich kids. They are full of shit, rotten through and through.

Not far away, there are girls lined up in a row, assessing the new guy. There, in California, Billy was, of course, a 10 out of 10, but honestly lots of guys there were fit, tanned, with dazzling smiles and that special something about them. Like they are... carefree. Life by the ocean gives you this, like a gift. No matter how much it hurt sometimes, the ocean always, always helped. Healed him. It's 1779 miles away now. The Atlantic is closer. Billy craves water washing over his feet.

So yeah, Billy looks good. He knows it. However, if back in California Billy's looks are nothing special, here, oh here he'll be a fucking curiosity. He bets he'll get lots of girls drooling to get a piece of his hot ass.

They are already checking out his car. Well, sure he can have fun, it's the last year of school, after all. Just nothing serious. And, most importantly, no one gets pregnant. Double bag it.

Billy was already beginning to get the sense of dull annoyance, with girls. They just want to get the status of a girlfriend. Then plan their whole life, his too. He doesn't fucking need it. So who cares about a relationship. Sex with no feelings involved is always a good option though.

Billy smiles to himself as he sees the chicks twirling their hair. A couple of them don't look so bad either. The rest is meh.

He throws what's left of his cigarette and heads for his first class.

@dragonflylady77 a huge thank you for your help💖

***

Chapter 2

#harringrove #harringrove slow burn #harringrove fic #mean steve vs mean billy #billy x steve #season 1 steve vs billy

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liaa--qb · 12 days

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why sudden hate on darklinas if team green stans rha*nicent, rhaegon ? Atleast Darklina was meant to be canon

Oh God🤦🏻‍♀️ !!!!!! Who is hating darklinas... moreover just bcz I mentioned them once😭 ( btw it was hated enough by it's author herself🤣 I can very much say that after wasting my time grisha books. sorry not sorry 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Before commenting anything some of u really need to read with open eyes n brain instead of ass.

I never hated darklinas or Darkling. I ship them too. Atleast book or whole story should be good enough to even hate or like any character first of all which it never had😑. Darklina is like very much any problematic random Ya bad guy and good girl silly ships u see on daily basis. Nothing more bad than any other Ya ships.

( LB n SJM are not even good writer. I don't like their work at all. Just over hyped to me. Honestly I still think how snb was not cancelled just after S1. If u have problem wf one of my post which wasn't even about them🤷🏻‍♀️ it's ur delulu headache buddy. I don't even involve with them much someone just asked me including Darkling's name that's y I replied... Btw I knew this would happen, bc If someone points one bad thing, all of them will cry their ass out.)

the point was something else n ur question is also wrong. Problematic has nothing to do with canon or non canon for ur info. Majority of YA canon ships are problematic but you can like whatever the f u want.

I never said that Rhaenicent is any healthy ship. Rhaenicent, Daemyra, alysmond , helaegon n majority of ships in hotd are problematic. It's just their Stans fighting is like one idiot jumping on another idiot.That's what I am always mentioning. That's just funny and extremely stupid to like one problematic ship or character n attacking on Stans of other problematic ships n characters.

Some of them shamelessly fight as if their life depends on it. It's really dumb honestly 😂. No one is stopping them btw they can do the heck they want to but also they should not even have problem if someone is pointing out their silliness that's it🤷🏻‍♀️. It's a free fandom ! Just bcz I mentioned some of TB Stans hyporcrisy once , idiots thought I am team green when I am srsly far away from this nursery kid color fight

Same way many of green stans also developed this stupid habit of making their characters as pure Angels just because of the changes done by the show itself which is rubbish instead of that they should really go for better storyline for every character. " Them saying no one should support TB after BnC is....😑" Like y ? Not saying that it was bad but bad things were done from both sides. Aemond n Daeron would have done way worse with Jace n strong boys if all their parents were dead honestly.

just like Alicent's anger on Aemond losing an eye was absolutely correct that same way Rhaenyra's anger was also justified, so would Helaena's anger as she and her children were having no fault in all of this

You can like the villian and their reasons for becoming the villain but I would not say they didn't deserve their death or punishment n I would not give any apology reasons ' like no he wasn't the bad guy or he wasn't a villian'. That's what I am always pointing but logic and GOT/FNB die hard Stans are never at same place 🤡

And regarding ur take one darkling or Darklina, I don't hate Darkling but ye he's not among my fav villians or any good written at all. Not only him, I don't like any single character from that book.

If I love Homelander, Klaus, soldier boy, Tom riddle, Rafe, Billy, Jerome, Roose bolton, Euron Greyjoy.., do you really think I would be anti Darkling or care fr him enough 😂 like these r just some tv screen villains I like but if I started talking about my actual favourite bad guys from Grim dark fantasy novels like Jorg ancrath n many more, Darkling would look like little twink infront of them😭

so pls think.. using your brain is not a big deal 🙏🏻

#house of dragons #hotd fandom #hotd discussion #hotd discourse #daemyra #rhaenicent #alysmond #shadow and bone #darklina #rhaenyra targaryen #daemon targeryan #alicent hightower #aemon targaryen #aegon the second #aegon targaryen

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harcove · 2 years

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Well, i saw this on someone's else's tumblr and I wanted to see what you think Billy's reaction would be like.

Soulmate stuff, people see only in black and white until they saw their soulmate for the first time. It can be a glimpse, just a little something in the corner of the eye and BOOM! Colors.

The idea: billy saw his soulmate for the first time in the school hallway, lots of people, no idea who it is and he just gets punched in the face by colors and colors.

A/N: okay so I hope you read this because it's important to say I kinda took this in a direction that maybe was less fluff, more angst? Because I really feel Billy would not like the idea of being bound to someone he didn't pick- like another part of his life is controlled. I think there would be a lot of mixed feelings from him. As you'll see in what I wrote. So I hope this is okay! I'm sorry if you wanted some fluff 😔 i got carried away with my characterization of Billy ily anon AND ik u said like u wanted to see how I think he'd react which is what I'm doing I JUST FEEL BAD ITS NOT FLUFFY- ily

Pairing: Billy x soulmate!reader (no interactions)

Length: 1.3k

Warnings: angst, Billy is depressed tbh, Billy has complex contradictory emotions, mentions of abuse, self-hate kind of, no dialogue just text

Not A Soulmate - B.H.

Billy hated the idea of soulmates.

It was stupid, he didn't need a better or more articulate word to describe it because the simple word was good enough, it was exactly what he thought it was. Stupid.

Seeing everything in black and white suited him just fine. Why did it matter if he were to see colour or not? His entire life had been black and white, literally and figuratively. So he never yearned to see colour.

He didn't like the idea that there was something out there, maybe an other wordly being, trying to dictate who he was meant to be with. It was already enough that his own father kept his foot down on him at all times, pushing him around and hurting him, but now even the person he was "meant to be with" was decided for him too?

No one told Billy Hargrove what to do. Not outside of his home. That was when his life was his for a few fleeting hours.

To be frank, he was almost positive that he didn't have a soulmate anyways. He wasn't meant to be with anyone, and God forbid someone was meant to be with him.

It wasn't that he thought himself to be unattractive; he'd had relationships. He'd done things in a night with people that he'd never talk to again about it. But that wasn't love. That wasn't having a soulmate, that was just lust. And that's what he knew about. Lust. Not love.

His father never found a soulmate. Not his mom, not Susan. Maybe there were people who were never bound to find that person. If it was true, he was glad that his father hadn't found a soulmate; he would ruin them with one touch. And maybe he would too if he found one.

It was so glaringly obvious when someone had a soulmate.

People would quite literally glow. It was annoying; the way they smiled and acted like their life before their soulmate had been worthless- as if life before hadn't been actually living till this person came into their life.

And the way they talked about colours? Sometimes forgetting not everyone had a soulmate yet?

God he despised it.

But Billy was fine where he was in life. No attachment to the people he had sex with; black and white walls, black and white everything. Nothing had deeper meaning, and it didn't need to have deeper meaning. This was fine.

He'd die seeing the world in black and white, and that was fine.

It was what he deserved he supposed.

The schools hallways were jam packed. They always were in the morning. And if Billy didn't have to drive his sister also to school next door, then he wouldn't even be here this early.

There had been times where the moment he left with Max, he drove just far enough, kicked her out of the car (she usually didn't react badly- she likely hated being with him just as much as he did) and made her skate while he fucked off somewhere else. Coming to school later.

That happened less often nowadays. His father had been harsher lately. He hoped it might pass.

It never passed.

Billy kept his head down at first when he entered the hellish hall; something inside him beckoned him to look up and scan the halls but he wouldn't do it. Not yet. He didn't want to look around and people he hated, people who wanted to be near him for the status he held. People who were more akin to lost sheep than human beings.

He wanted nothing more than to be away from here. Not just the school, but Hawkins in general.

Billy Hargrove was made for the sun and the ocean- he believed that. He was made for something that wasn't Hawkins. Hawkins fit wrong; like a pair of jeans that were loose. It wanted to be right, but nothing was right. (He couldn't admit that sometimes California fit weirdly too. Maybe he had no where; belonged no where.)

He wouldn't give it a chance, not a real one at least. To him, Hawkins deserved his ire, it deserved not even a single chance to cage him in. To take away the only thing he had left- California.

But it already had, hadn't it? It took the beach, the sun, the friends he actually did have back in California. It took his mother. (His father did that. But California was where he saw her last. It was as close to her as he could get. And now that was gone too.)

If he tried maybe he could grow to like it in Hawkins. But months had gone by, and he was no closer to letting Hawkins try to grow on him.

Billy Hargrove was just angry. Even if he couldn't see colour, California felt colourful. He had no idea what that meant but he felt it. He didn't need a soulmate, he didn't need anyone, he only needed himself. He could only trust himself. And even that was a challenge.

An arm brushes into his own as he pushes down the hall, lost in thought; no, not brushes- it's more like a shove. Likely not on purpose; likely someone in a rush. But he doesn't care.

He's angry. He's always angry. And that's just the thing he needs: something to channel it into.

"Hey, watch where the fuck you're going-" it forces him to look up so he can yell, scanning his eyes for the person in the crowds. Yell at the person who did it.

But he stops. It all stops. Like a ship stranded at sea; no wind to guide its way and make use of the masts. Completely and utterly still.

Colour. Too much colour.

It comes in from the centre of his vision and it spreads like water colour on paper. It's too bright, too colourful- he can't even begin to describe the colours because he never knew what blue looked like, red, green- he doesn't know what they look like. All he knows is black and white.

All he knew was black and white.

It makes his head pound. His stomach churn. He feels like he may actually vomit on the now coloured floor; something that once was grey is now a colour he can't name. It forces him to take a foot back because it feels like someone has quite literally just tried to run him over in a freight.

His heart aches. And his body feels heavy. And now he's just standing there. In the middle of he hall. And no one gets mad at him for blocking the dead centre because he's Billy Hargrove, and right now, he looks scary. Scarier than usual.

This isn't happening.

He repeats it like a mantra in his head. Because this seriously could not be happening.

No. He was only meant to ever see black and white. He had decided that for himself- he wasn't meant to have a soulmate. He was a man doomed to a life alone; finding pleasure in nameless people with forgotten faces. He was the dictator in that part of his life. He could never be someone's soulmate.

He would only ruin them.

So why?

His head whips around. He's looking; navigating the new colours in the world, but he's looking for them. The person who did this to him. The person who took the black and white away; that safety away, and painted it with colour.

The person who had him scared for once in his life away from his father. The person that he... Wanted to find but at the same time he wanted to never see.

His world was off kilter. And he didn't know how to navigate it.

It felt nice. But horrifying all the same. And he was angry, at the unknown person, at himself, at the world. He was a ticking time bomb in that moment and he hated it. He wanted them but he wanted nothing. He was nothing.

For once, Billy Hargrove, was truly, completely, utterly lost.

#mine #billy hargrove x reader #billy x reader #Billy hargrove #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #billy hargrove fanfiction #my writing #amy writes

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ihni · 10 months

Text

Tagged by @ratbastardbilly (a WHILE ago; thank you!)

Note before we start: a few questions below are about ships, and if there's one thing you need to know about me is that I'm not in it for the SHIP, I'm in it for the CHARACTER. And that character is Billy Hargrove.

1.ride or die ship (your otp): Harringrove

2. most annoying ship: Depends on how they're framed, honestly. Any ship can be annoying when done right (or wrong).

3. second favourite ship: Idk, probably like Mungrove or Harringroveson?

4. favourite platonic relationship: I want Billy to have ALL the friends, so put him with just about ANYONE as a friend and I'm a happy gal (Steve, Jonathan, Eddie, Chrissy, Robin, Nancy, Patrick, Tommy, Carol ... just give the guy some friends!)

5. underrated ship: Bob and Benny. Come on, imagine Hop's reaction, it would be glorious.

6. overrated ship: I don't know, because I don't read or look at ships that don't interest me. (But I imagine any that involve Mike Wheeler. Whoever he is shipped with probably deserves better.)

7. one thing i would change in canon: ONE thing only? Okay: Billy lives. But like, I can fill a book with the things I would change in canon.

8. something canon did right: Season 1 in general, Robin's coming-out scene in season 3, most of the soundtrack.

9. a thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART: I sometimes doodle? And I sometimes write? And I'm pretty happy about doing both of those things actually. (Also one time I did cookie doodles which was fun and should be a thing)

10. a character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): Mr Clarke. Underrated, knowledgeable, cool Mr Clarke. They should bring him into things. Dude has unknowingly provided them with vital information for several seasons.

11. the character i relate to the most and why: ... probably Mr Clarke, too? No fashion sense, good taste in music, weird special interests, creative/likes fiddling with little creative things that takes time, good at one's job, supportive, happy to explain things and rolling with weird questions, and also happily not involved in any drama.

12. character(-s) i hate the most and why: Neil Hargrove (should have gotten what was coming for him, and luckily he WILL). Brenner (should have died for real that first time around). And I might not hate them, but I dislike several Wheelers (Karen bc of the whole flirting-with-Billy thing, Nancy because of the holier-than-thou attitude, Mike because of his general existence). Am also not too fond of Hopper in season 3. He was an asshole there, and I felt nothing for his supposed "death". Also, since Billy's my favorite, I must admit that I have lost respect for most of the supposed "heroes" of the show since they showed themselves so unwilling to try to save Billy.

13. something i've learned from the fandom: One doesn't have to create stuff to be in fandom. Someone's gotta be the audience, too. (And I'm very good at being the audience, because I love everyone's stuff.)

14. three tags i seek out on ao3: Billy Hargrove, hurt/comfort, Realizations

15. a song i strongly associate with my otp/favourite character: Jaymes Young - I'll be good ... K.Flay - Blood in the cut ... Troye Sivan - Talk me down ... Queen - Good old-fashioned lover boy ... among others ...

Tagging: @weird-an @callieb @cherrydreamer @billyharringson @lazybakerart @missroserose @disdaidal @dragonflylady77

#tag games #tagging games

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auld-a · 2 years

Text

Let’s talk about Billy

Would like to preface this by saying that this is not my usual TWST content so anyone who is here for that I apologize. I’m currently trying to create a schedule for it so it will be up and running soon

(If you take a shot every time I say “that’s not an excuse” or some variation of it you’d die)

Okay I’m gonna start this post off by saying this is no way written to defend Billy Hargrove’s actions or even get Billy antis or whoever else to like him, it’s simply to clear up a huge miscommunication in the fandom that I’m honestly tired of seeing.

So it’s pretty clear that a lot of ST things fans hate Billy, and honestly? Fair. He’s kind of a piece of shit I won’t even deny that

He’s coded to be racist or at least act out of some sort of prejudice and somewhat of an abuser so if you don’t like him due to this THATS UNDERSTANDABLE. But you also frequently get onto other ST fans who actually do like him.

So I’m here to tell you why you’re wasting your breath and making the ST fandom very irritating to interact with

From the beginning Billy was portrayed as a Top Tier A hole, threatening his little sister for something minor, trying to fucking run over children, beating the shit out of Steve, just overall a dick. And all of that is 100% true and valid reasons to dislike him

But it was also shown that he doesn’t have a good home life with his dad beating his ass for Billy just, existing. NOW BEFORE YOU LEAVE. That. Is not. An excuse. It never has been and it never will be. He should be absolutely held accountable for everything he’s done up until this point because he’s done a lot of inexcusable shit. So you can shit on him for that I don’t really care

But believe it or not there are actually people who were interested in his character writing and chose to look deeper into him and who he is past what they gave us in seasons 2 and 3😐

Speaking from my point of view, I don’t like canon Billy. Like I’ve said several times he sucked a lot. But to be honest I don’t think that’s who the character Billy actually is. I think that all of that is a response from being abandoned as a child and dealing with years of physical abuse. Again, since I don’t want you to misinterpret my words, not an excuse, but it gives us a lot of background.

Season 2 and 3 Billy does a lot of things that could be born from underlying racism, even if it’s not outwardly said it’s there, but I personally do not think that’s because those are things he genuinely believes himself. If his asshole father sees his step-daughter hanging around a person he doesn’t like due to prejudice, did it ever occur to you who would be the one inevitably getting punished for it? Billy would. Not Max, I don’t think Neil has the balls to lay hands on his partner’s kid but he’ll do it to his own since we already know Max’s mom won’t do shit about it. Not wanting to get his ass handed to him for something that’s not his fault he’s obviously gonna try to cut the interaction between Lucas and Max. Not because he dislikes Lucas, not because he’s racist, but because otherwise he’ll get beat half to death

All this to say, I know he can be better. I don’t think all is lost for him. I think there’s more to him than what we see on the surface and if he were to be separated from the negative environment and allowed to experience life for himself instead of clouded by fear be wouldn’t be such a shit head

Trauma is not an excuse for the shit he’s done, but the moment trauma response/survival instinct gets ugly and isn’t just anxiety and flinching when someone raises their hand, you don’t believe they deserve an ounce of sympathy or a chance for redemption

I know he not only has the potential to make amends with those he hurt but completely forget the ignorant sentiments he’s been forced to abide by. That doesn’t mean any character is required to forgive him or you are for that matter but you really need to understand that when people talk about liking him they’re usually separating canon Billy from the Billy we never got the chance to see.

And I know some of y’all cream your pants at the fact that the duffer brothers confirmed Billy to be racist, but to be honest with you I could not give a flying fuck what the Duffer brothers say. They’ve proven more and more with each season that they may know how to write a story but not a character. If it weren’t for the actors pushing for certain scenes or refusing to do others these characters wouldn’t be half as fleshed out as they are. We owe a lot of the character writing to the people that portray them, therefore i hold a lot more weight in what they say than i do the creators. What the Duffer Brothers say is not Gospel to me, and it would be smart of you to not consider it as such either.

You can hate canon Billy all you want, I don’t care, but don’t get pissy at people who choose to look deeper than the surface of who he is and miss what they could’ve had for him because he was just being built up to be a throwaway.

If they support what season 2 or 3 Billy did that’s a different story, definitely not okay, but I’ve yet to see anyone do that all I see is people who don’t feel comfortable watering down his entire character and role in the story to ‘racist’ because at the end of the day, that truly is just an opinion based on how you choose to read into his character

TLDR; don’t put anti billy crap in spaces that like billy just because they wanna appreciate a character that had potential and is more than what most of you want to see

If you don’t take anything away from this, fine, just be respectful in the notes if you choose to interact

#stranger things #billy hargrove #harringrove #mungrove #harringroveson #steddilly #anti billy hargrove #whatever other tags apply to this

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mike-wheeler-faggotry · 2 years

Text

Saw the strangest take from a Billy anti today. "People who want Billy to be redeemed all only think racism is a character flaw that can be fixed🙄"

First of all. No, not every Billy fan is racist. The majority aren't. A lot of Billy fandom is also traumatized and see ourselves in him. We want him to redeem himself because we want him to heal from his trauma and become a healthier person, and a lot of his angry destructive behavior is due to a self-destructive trauma response.

Secondly... Racism is a flaw that can be fixed? Like, it's a very destructive flaw, but so is any bigotry. So is just being a sensitive person with a "fight" response to stress. I'd absolutely love it if racists stopped being racist and redeemed themselves.

My parents are in their 60s and transphobic, and I'd love it if they stopped being transphobic after all they've done to me. That doesn't mean I'd forgive the hurt they'd done, not without some apologizing and fixing things, but I'd be happy they stopped being bigoted. And Billy is a teenager in an actively threatening home situation. He's had no opportunity to grow as a person, and he has so much time to do so.

Does being a bigoted teenager really deserve the death penalty? I'm not saying it's okay he's racist, but he certainly didn't deserve to die for it. I'm not denying he's treated Max really shittily, but I'd much prefer he'd get better and become an actual big brother instead of hurting her. His dying canonically messed her up.

Essentially, I think it's really shitty people look at a traumatized character with no incentive to become a good person and think he should die for not being a saint.

#kicking the hornet's nest today lads #posting about the prick #billy #billy tumblr #billy hargrove #billy hargrove tumblr

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kazzyboy · 2 years

Text

Okay I’m so mad about the people bullshitting over Max’s letter. So I’m going on a rant, strap in.

My sister is dead. Yup, dead. Been dead for awhile. It’s actually kinda funny cause both her and Billy were 18 when they died (still hanging onto my BillyHargroveLives clown car), but besides the point.

We didn’t usually get along. In fact, I can think of five occasions where we actively got along. That’s five occasions in the thirteen years of my life I spent with her. We were either arguing or just ignoring each other. I know Billy and Max are not blood siblings and probably only knew each other for (a very estimated) six years, but there was, apparently, a lot of animosity and things between them.

Before I go on, I’m just gonna say that you can hate or love or be indifferent to Billy, idc. He’s a complicated ass character and that’s good. Please do not try to say he was/is incapable of change and he deserved what he got (because no one fucking deserves that wtf). My sister was little, she was always little, but she was just as troubled as Billy. You want to know the only thing I thought at her funeral, for hours of silence? She’s just a kid. She’s just a baby.

Billy was still a teenager and still had plenty of fucking time to change. On top of that, I know abuse is not and will never be an excuse for his absolutely rancid behavior, but it is a factor. It’s a very concerning factor, at that. But Billy did try— he tried not to hit them and he tried to fight the mind flayer and he tried to protect them. The sacrifice was not a complete redemption, no, not at all. But it was a start.

This is where I start talking about Max. I guess I’m Max in this situation. I know it’s different— my sister was my blood sister and I spent years of my life knowing her etc etc, but being in that vicinity to someone for years (calling them your sibling) is exactly what Max did. Not to mention she watched him die, gruesomely, for her and her friends (blaming Susie for that Lowkey). Even if you didn’t watch them die or had no part in it at all, there is always going to be guilt. Logically, I knew I had physically no way of knowing what would happen to my sister, but I still blamed myself, just a little. If I had done this, if I hadn’t done that. And there’s the guilt of relief in knowing someone who was hurting you directly or indirectly is gone. It fucking sucks.

So Max spent years watching someone she called her brother get smacked around, drive her around, be forced to watch her. And there’s guilt for that, too, because people have feelings and a lot of those are empathy. Max is a good person, no matter how shitty Billy had treated her and her friends, and she knew it wasn’t fair— the way Billy was treated and the way he treated others. Say what you want about it being an excuse, but abuse in any capacity royally fucks you up. Again, not an excuse for his behavior, but a factor. There will be that hurt there— knowing it was unfair and she couldn’t help it and the gut-wrenching knowledge that they could’ve changed, that they were getting better. So yes, Max wrote Billy a letter and she cried over him and she felt like shit about it all. It may not have been right or perfect, but she’s a human being and that’s probably how she felt. Feelings are endlessly complicated and likely conflicted.

On another note, it is also important to remember that these people are fictional. The actors/actresses did a fucking fantastic job and all deserve a gift basket or some shit

I don’t care if Neil felt bad or not I want to run him over with a tractor

Rant over until further notice

#billy hargrove #maxine mayfield #max mayfield #neil hargrove #stranger things #st #Tw #stranger things s4

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memes-saved-me · 2 years

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What bothers me the most about Season 4 is the poor and bad writing. Max is acting like season 3 doesn't exist and is happening right after season 2. I would have had zero trouble with Max's feelings towards Billy had the writers portrayed it better. She keeps telling us how bad Billy was, but we didn't see any of that. After Max "put Billy in his place" so to speak in Season 2, he calmed down from what we saw in Season 3. She spoke of him in a relatively unproblematic way, complaining mildly over loud happy noises, him tending his muscles, etc., as siblings do. She was also visibly very concerned for him and hoped he wasn't possessed. When he sacrifices himself, she screams in terror. That's why it's hard for me to take Max seriously in season 4. Suddenly she keeps saying how bad he was, but doesn't give any concrete examples, neither are we shown any. This is where the superficiality of writers comes into play. It comes across as very sloppy.

I'm all for Max's complicated feelings towards Billy and I don't think she believes he deserved to die in the slightest but that line does not make sense with the rest of everything.

Her saying she wished he would die, disappear or something bad would happen to him in my opinion was before and during S2. Billy is canon in being a dickhead before Hawkins but he's worse once he arrives and she knows this, shows genuine discomfort at his behaviour and clearly fears him until the last episode where she threatens him. From then on, including the look shared between them before the Snowball comes across as a mutual sign of respect.

Max stood her ground and Billy backed off. Cut to 6-7 months later and they seem to at the least co-exist successfully and everything she says about him is that of surface level annoyance at having a big brother. Happy screams, working out like crazy and being a weirdo are all things she brings up like its just a mild inconvenience not a controlling abusive brother.

I'm sure they had their moments still, fights and negative feelings but it comes across as if Billy had calmed down and Max stopped being under his thumb. I don't doubt he was hell to live with, Neil as well before and after the move to Hawkins but Max's entire demeanor and emotions towards Billy in S3 just don't add up to "I froze because I wasn't sure if he deserved to be saved or not"

Her whole speech was great, realistic and made her entire arch for S4 even more heartbreaking but then that final line felt off. Everything else worked so well, added to her letter greatly and then the reason she froze just doesn't make sense.

A 14 year old girl running in to see her brother facing off a monster and her freezing in fear makes total sense. What would she have done? Push him out of the way? Max staying away from him made sense.

Her guilt for wishing him away and then it actually happening is such a good narrative point and character development tool that I was in shock when I watched that scene. It broke me because it was real.

Now, I think Max is totally valid in her feelings. It makes sense and its a human response and I don't for a second believe she thinks he deserved to die. She wants to die herself she feels so bad about even thinking that for a moment. However, now knowing the Duffers don't rewatch their own show it makes sense why that one line doesn't add up in the grand scale of things.

Throughout S3 Max is worried, scared and upset that Billy is the host but then suddenly she doesn't know if he's worth saving? Bullshit. I think the Duffers forgot her whole fucking character in S3 and only remembered S2. I love Max and I am here for her having very complicated feelings towards Billy but I trust her letter more than her speech. Her letter was for Billy not for Vecna like her speech was.

I don't think the Duffers are saying he deserved to die either. I just think they can be shitty writers at times and rely on better directors to carry their show.

Everything Max said I stand by except for that one line because it has no context to back it up whereas everything else does.

I might have rambled but I do love this show for what it is and I love Billy separately in a way. Anyway Dear Billy is the best episode of the show and its about our boy so we win lol

#long post #not tagging #longpost

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spaceofentropy · 10 months

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tag game - stranger things edition

The lovely @dragonflylady77 and @harringrovest tagged me so here I am!

ride or die ship (your otp): Harringrove

most annoying ship: it's a tie between Steve/Nancy (those two don't work together in canon, they are like soap and grease, why even try to put them together AGAIN?!) and Byler (because Will deserves way better than Mike Wheeler, and he should realize it soon for his own good! T^T)

second favourite ship: Metalsandwich. There's something so fun in the ways those three interact and interconnect...

favourite platonic relationship: Stobin all the way!

underrated ship: Mungrove

overrated ship: Byler (again, free Will Byers 2023!)

one thing i would change in canon: ONE?! I get only ONE and I even have to choose which one?! How can I decide?! [Sadie Doyle voice] The utter inconsistency in how the UD works! No, Troy the little bully almost killing a kid and getting away scot free! No! El needing to be re-traumatized to get her powers back! No! Karen Wheeler noncing around unpunished! No! Eddie's stupid death! No! The rest of the party being shitty friends to Lucas again and again and him just going along with it in the end like it's no big deal! No! Nobody actually trying to pull the mindflayer out of Billy! No, just Billy's death in general!

something canon did right: quoting @harringrovest's answer, lifeguard!Billy. And Steve in that silly silly sailor outfit. Season 3 was a weird beast, but at least it gave us those two things!

a thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART: my metalsandwich long fic Of soulmates and colors and also my oneshots Come close and Amok which were banged out in a couple of hours each but I love a lot. And also What doesn't kill you makes you a monster, because writing demobat!Steve Harrington was fun as fuck! Yeah, basically I'm proud of each fic I published, thank you. And I'm also very proud of the shark glasses that led to THIS! beautiful, perfect edit by @imsodishy 🥲❤️

a character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): Billy Hargrove

the character i relate to the most and why: Billy Hargrove, because... well, personal reasons.

character i hate the most and why: Dr. Martin fucking Brenner, because he kidnapped kids, manipulated and tortured them, tortured El's mom until her mind broke, and the narrative wants us to... not hate him, not really, because after all he was right? He re-tortures and re-traumatizes El but it's for the greater good? Well, fuck that shit, fuck the Duffers and their whole writers' room, and fuck Brenner with a rusty pipe!

something i've learned from the fandom: as with anywhere else, there are lovely talented people in fandom that make great stuff, and there are also not great people (looking at you, assholes who wish harm on others because they like one character you dislike!), so the block button is your best friend. Also, squeeing in happiness at good art and fics is even sweeter when done in group! ❤️

three tags i seek out on ao3: I don't really have an answer, since I don't usually look for specific stuff; I more go with the flow or jump on fics that someone recommended/mentioned that sound interesting.

song i strongly associate with my otp/favourite character: Desire by Meg Myers is so Harringrove it hurts; and while Wolf by Yeah Yeah Yeahs is pure "Billy Hargrove after basking in Steve's love a little too long", Like You Better Dead is my favourite Billy-coded song, because, yeah, he can be as angry as he wants to be, just watch him burn!

I should tag someone, so... uh... argh! Hoping you've not been tagged, and begging preemptively pardon just in case... @salthat @destroya2005 @ariesbilly @suometar and anyone who sees this and wants to do it! :P

#tag game #stranger things #tw fandom bullshit #just in passing but it's there #very important post #me

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local-redhead-bookworm · 2 years

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I've rewatched the battle of starcourt episode and I'm mad. I'm mad-sad.

When el was talking to billy trying to bring him back, to make him escape the mind flayer's control, she used THE ONLY HAPPY MEMORY THAT BILLY HAD. Whilst in sez 2, when the gang was trying to do the same with will, they used like 20 happy memories, or more. He didn't break from it, he just managed to send them a message, but that's different and I don't blame will at all cause he was younger and all of that. He gets a pass. That boy suffered enough.

However, what made me mad-sad is the parallel. Billy had one happy memory. Will had 20+. Billy was 18 and he had one happy memory. Will was 12-13 and already had 20+ happy memories, just like any child should.

People see that shit and then they have the audacity to say that Billy deserved to die. They say that his tiny redemption arc was enough and it was his time to die. Really?

Also, I've seen some reactions on that episode on youtube and to see people cheer when Billy was injured or humiliated and then CRY at his death scene and his past (when el gets inside his brain)???? Like what the actual fuck???

Sorry for the language but I'm shocked. Sorry for ranting to you but i know you will understand. Thank you for listening :)

Never apologize for rambling about Billy. He’s my baby boy and I could talk about him until the cows come home.

Battle of Starcourt is an episode that I hate to rewatch. Literally every character in the show had multiple happy memories. Billy had only one. His life has been such an accumulation of anguish that he has only one good memory, and it seems like he buried it deep down too, maybe because that one good memory was too painful in comparison to all the bad ones, because it reminded him that things weren’t always the way they are when he dies.

I don’t understand people who cheer when Max knocks Billy unconscious. Like one, there’s no music to clue us in that this is meant to be triumphant. Two, that’s basically a mirror image of what Neil did. I saw that scene and it completely rearranged how I saw Billy’s character. Maybe it’s because I’m a bleeding heart for traumatized characters with “bad” coping mechanisms, but anyway.

I don’t understand how someone could go from cheering at seeing him being abused to crying when he dies. It just doesn’t add up. We have a whole season to see that Max and Billy’s relationship since season two has gotten better. It’s only implied, but we’ve gone from her hating him to just being like “eww he’s my gross older brother” and looking distressed while he was in the sauna and cradling his body.

His death is a heartbreaking scene. I can see why the scene would make people cry because it’s very well done with the music and framing and all that, and they really drive home just how painful and tragic his death was. Heck, it made me cry last time I watched it. The shot right before he holds off the monster’s tentacle (you know the one) emphasizes just how young he is. I know that Dacre was ~24, but still, Billy was just 18. He had his whole life ahead of him.

#stranger things #billy hargrove #stranger things analysis #answering asks #let’s play “spot the Frankenstein quote’’

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the-sun-and-the-sea · 2 years

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TBOSAS Thoughts (Chapters 28-30, +Epilogue)

Coriolanus grapples with the moral aftermath of potentially turning Sejanus in via the jabberjays. This is one of those moments where I really feel like his morality is taking a turn for the worse. Although he doesn’t want Sejanus to actually die (he even tries to convince himself that outcome is unlikely, to assuage his guilt), he still had no problem betraying his best friend.

Another thing I found interesting this chapter was the rebels’ plan to leave Panem and go ‘up north’ where there are no districts or Capitol. I wonder if there ever were people up there, and if so, are they still there by the events in the original trilogy? I feel like someone should write a fic about that because I’d love to read it.

At the Covey’s weekly performance at the Hob, Coriolanus keeps a close eye on Sejanus in hopes of catching him working with the rebels. He finds Sejanus and a man named Spruce working to collect guns and supplies for their mission. However, plans are derailed by the arrival of Billy Taupe and Mayfair (the mayor’s daughter who is dating Billy Taupe).

Coriolanus is concerned that Mayfair, who is not part of the rebel plan, will go tell her father everything she saw, including everyone who was involved. Naturally, he’s concerned that he’ll get busted for working with the rebels. Instead of taking the time to talk or think out a rational solution, he just grabs a gun and kills Mayfair. Just like that. No hesitation. He reasons that it was self defense because he’s saving himself from a potential hanging. He compares it to killing Bobbin in the arena, although he says this kill is easier.

I don’t think the audience is supposed to see it that way, though. By now, it’s made very clear that Coriolanus is a dangerous person. His ambition and self-serving nature only serve to make him more of a threat to anyone who disagrees with him.

He spends the next few days paranoid that he’ll be arrested for the murder of Mayfair, but it never happens. Instead, they just arrest Sejanus. At first, Coriolanus thinks that this will be a good wake-up call for Sejanus. But then he learns that Sejanus isn’t going to be spending time in jail, he’s going to be executed for treason.

Coriolanus actually does start to feel guilty here, especially as he watches it happen. The execution hurt more to read this time than last, for some reason. Sejanus deserved so much better, and what happened to him was truly tragic.

In chapter 29, Coriolanus grapples with his feelings about Sejanus’ death. He admits that he was the one to kill Sejanus, but rationalizes his decision by saying that it had to be done, and that Sejanus was on a self destructive path anyway. By this point in the book, it’s made very clear that Coriolanus has a skewed moral compass.

His biggest concern, though, is that he will be arrested and charged with Mayfair’s murder. However, when the commander calls Coriolanus to his office, he only expresses his sympathy to Coriolanus and his gratitude at the sacrifice he made in turning Sejanus in. Coriolanus tells the commander that he and Sejanus were “like brothers” (because he only pretends to like Sejanus when he can get something out of it, as we know) which earns him more sympathy points. This whole scene is just infuriating. He just never faces any consequences.

Coriolanus sees Lucy Gray again when the Covey performs at the commander’s birthday party. Their relationship looks as stable as it’s ever been (at least from Lucy Gray’s pov) because Coriolanus doesn’t tell her that he turned Sejanus in. He thinks trust is important and also recognizes that his girlfriend values trust above all else, and yet he lies to her like every chapter.

Anyway, he and Lucy Gray make a plan to meet at the hanging tree and run away somewhere ‘up north,’ where Sejanus was going to go with the rebels. However, before Coriolanus can meet Lucy Gray, he learns that he has passed the test to begin training to become an officer.

Chapter 30 begins with his initial excitement and pride about this new development in his Peacekeeper career, but it’s tinged with regret because Coriolanus knows he promised to meet Lucy Gray at the hanging tree so they can run away together. He decides to follow through on his plan with Lucy Gray and they run to the woods.

It’s here that Coriolanus realizes that he really, really hates the woods. He even says that it would be easier if he wasn’t “such an exceptional person.” That part always makes me laugh because the entitlement is so prominent.

As they’re talking in the woods, it becomes increasingly clearer that Coriolanus and Lucy Gray are incompatible. I really like this slow build of tension. It’s gradual until Coriolanus realizes that Lucy Gray knows he’s the one who killed Sejanus, and then he decides that she must be eliminated. Like, the change is instantaneous. It’s absolutely wild how his mind works, but an incredibly fascinating read.

After some deliberating, Coriolanus tries to kill Lucy Gray. But due to the rain and the mockingjays, he’s unable to tell if he actually shot her or not. I really like Lucy Gray’s real life ending paralleling the ending of her song; I think it’s so poetic and beautiful. Personally, I don’t try to fill in the gaps of what happened to her. I like the mystery.

Another small detail that I wanted to point out is when Coriolanus gets back to the Peacekeeper base, he realizes that the rose powder from his mother’s compact has been damaged by the rain, so he throws it away. I really love this subtle symbolic representation of Coriolanus leaving his childhood behind. Conversely, the only thing that did survive the rain was his father’s compass, symbolizing the fact that he would take on his father’s traits in his adult life.

The chapter ends with Coriolanus returning to the Capitol and learning that he was never meant to be a Peacekeeper in the first place; Dr. Gaul only meant to keep him there for the summer until he could start college classes in the fall. If this were any other protagonist, we’d be happy with this ending and glad our hero triumphed. But here, we know that Coriolanus is no hero, and the fact that he has no consequences for his actions just ends up feeling very unsatisfying, which it’s supposed to.

One of the most striking things about the epilogue is that our main character isn’t referred to ‘Coriolanus’ anymore, he’s referred only by his last name, Snow. He feels more like the tyrannical president we know now. I really like how this was done so I just wanted to mention it.

Perhaps the most frustrating thing about the epilogue is that Snow is basically adopted by the Plinths and lives off their money. Even though he killed Sejanus, they treat him like a son because they don’t know the truth, and of course he lets them. It’s absolutely infuriating and it makes the tragedy of Sejanus’ outcome hit harder.

We also learn that he bans shows at the Hob in District 12, which is so unnecessarily petty and totally sucks, because now the Covey has no way of making money. I just wanted to mention it because it felt so unjust.

His last action of the book is to take yet another life by poisoning Dean Highbottom. We know from the original trilogy that Snow poisons his enemies and makes it look like an accident, so this action just seals the deal on what person he is becoming.

I’m going to take a second to talk about my overall thoughts after the reread, then I’ll be done. Overall, I’m glad I did this reread and I found it very fascinating to go back and relive these moments. I think I got more out of the book this time than the first time. However, I will say that this is a hard book to reread. It can be difficult to get through some parts when you already know what’s coming. It feels like a very dense book and I probably won’t read it again for a while, even though I think the book is good.

For these last chapters, I listened to I’ll Sell You For a Song, Pure as the Driven Snow, and The Hanging Tree. Here’s a link to the full playlist in case you want to listen to all the songs again.

Thank you so much for reading my thoughts for the past ten weeks! Feel free to reblog this post or send an ask if you want to chat about the book. <3

#I can't believe we're done with the book #thanks to everyone who's been reading these posts #I appreciate you all sticking with me #tbosas reread #tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #ballad of songbirds and snakes #thg #the hunger games #coriolanus snow #lucy gray baird #sejanus plinth

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artianaiolanthe · 2 years

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TLDR: I don’t like Billy Hargrove as portrayed by the fandom at large and said portrayal only makes me actively hate his character when on further reflection my biggest issue with him is wasted potential

I don’t hate Billy Hargrove as a character.

I don’t believe he was irredeemable, I don’t believe he’s the worst/most evil person on the show, I don’t believe he deserved to die. Looking only at what is to be seen from the source material, I can actually say Billy was an interesting character with potential for development. At some point I could have said I was excited to see what would be done with him.

But when I say I hate Billy, I mean I hate what the fandom has done to him. I hate the shipping object who’s there because y’all want to shove Steve into a relationship with another “attractive” boy, I hate the pity sink that has no responsibility for any of his wrongs because of his abuse, I hate the woobified little meow meow I see time and time again that the stans can’t seem to separate from what was portrayed on screen and I hate Olympic level mental gymnastics people twist themselves into because they can’t acknowledge his flaws.

Billy doesn’t HAVE to be a good person, you know? You can like him warts and all. It doesn’t make you a bad person to like a shitty character, asshole characters can be fun and entertaining. David from Lost Boys has the same energy as Billy (minus my biggest criticism) and I adore him. Some of my favourite American Horror Story characters are utter abominations of human beings.Toffee from Star Vs. is probably the show’s best character. The only Silent Hill protagonist who’s got an argument for being a good person is Harry and he’s one of my least favourites. I’ll always love and miss Kali. It’s kind of sad if the only way you can enjoy a character is to ignore or absolve them of wrongdoings, it’s part of who they are, it’s what makes them unique.

And ignoring these flaws that are fundamentally how they are shown to interact with the rest of the cast, in Billy’s case especially, is infuriating. You can’t look at Billy’s behaviour towards Lucas and say he isn’t racist; you can’t look at how he terrorized Max and say he never abused her, you can’t act like everything he’s done has been a silly little misunderstanding and isn’t seriously fucked up! I know it’s fandom, you want to draw and gif and write fic, I’m not saying to like Billy you have to have an itemized list of his sins and swear you do not agree with him, but the bare fucking minimum you need to do is acknowledge his wrongs and not argue with anyone about the fact that they happened.

What, do you write Billy as though he’s never done any of the things he’s called out for? That’s how you write him, not how the show portrays him. You can write and hc to your heart’s content any au you like but don’t treat it like canon, or like it should be the universal view of him.

And for the love of god if you really feel the need to defend him, stop and think of why. Why can’t he be racist or abusive? Why do you have to insist he’s not what he so clearly is. Goody Proctor isn’t going to point you out at the Black Sabbath for liking a fictional character, why can’t it be and instead of but or because? Billy can feel protective of Max and be abusive of her in the process, Billy can be a victim and perpetuate the abuse he suffers, most of all Billy can be deserving of sympathy AND have racist behaviours to unlearn.

But do you want to have to reckon with that? Do you really feel like the only way you can like Billy is to ignore these very integral parts of him and completely rewrite his history? Or do you genuinely not see anything wrong with his behaviour? Cause if so, I wanna know what bandersnatch bullshit your netflix pulled to let you watch a different show. I hope you can bite your tongue whenever Billy comes up because you clearly aren’t acknowledging what everyone else is and you shouldn’t have a place in the argument if you’re going to ignore the facts.

Again, I like Billy’s character as a concept. It would have been very interesting if the plot we got included some self reflection, some development, not a 180 into a saint but at least a complex Moral Greyness that would have made him an interesting part of the cast. I can see that his reaction to abuse was very different from Jonathan and Will’s and it should have made for a fascinating parallel. I don’t hate Billy because of the way his abuse has caused him to lash out.

I hate Billy because he chose to lash out in a racist manner and because he lashed out at his younger stepsister in a way where she was clearly scared of him in season two. I hate him because he, like much of Stranger Things, is a well of wasted potential.

And most of all, I hate him because many of his fandom refuses to acknowledge his flaws and wants to pretend he’s not responsible for his bigotry and hatred.

Billy was never going to be the next Zuko or Steve’s soulmate. He is a victim and a tragic one of circumstances beyond his control. But he’s also an abusive and racist bully and it’s not exaggerating or reductive to say that. It’s just a facet of who he is in the grand scheme of hurt people hurting other people. Billy chose to punch down and in show will never have a chance to atone for it, and while a redemption fic would be nice to read I don’t think I could bring myself to because I’ve only been shown that people only care about the good parts of redemption (the rewards and the acceptance) and couldn’t care less about the work and the consequences. The Duffers may have killed Billy off in an unsatisfying and underwhelming manner, but in my eyes Billy never had a chance to thrive as a character because the majority of the fandom tried so hard to white out his flaws. In the show he’s a disappointment and in fandom for me he only inspires vitriol. Everything about Fandom Billy is a hollow vessel of fool’s gold and I fucking hate everything about it.

#billy hargrove #stranger things #stranger things discussion #anti harringrove #don't really feel like tagging this as anti billy because i'm trying to articulate my problems rather than bash him #but tread carefully if you're sensitive i guess #this isn't calling out anyone in particular #there was just a straw that broke the camel's back #so now we have a 1000 word ramble about why fandom ruined billy for me

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hardestgrove · 2 years

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I feel like some of these people don’t understand that like… the only way to actually tackle things like racism is to engage with it. Like in the sense that you have to look at it and think about it and process how it exists in your life to be able to actually not do the thing and to understand it and how it acts in the world. And that it’s been literally proven in studies and shit that antagonism against people with opposing views only makes them dig in their heels. You see it in people in mlms, cults and people with "strongly held beliefs", you attack or belittle their Thing and they double down on it.

Every time I see some be like “Billy is racist” I’m like okay and? We gonna engage with this? Because I’m not saying his action didn’t have a racist element, I’m asking what you wanna do about it. If your answer is something like “Billy deserves to die” then you’re not helping. That’s not a useful argument. “Racist kid deserves to die for being a racist” is what’ll validate the world view and keep a kid in a neo nazi group. Because they care about him and you insult him and want him dead. You see how that's counterproductive? You see how that doesn't help squash the actual problem?

It also just creates even more of a tense environment around the already tense discussion of race. Media is a wonderful way to get into discussion about these kinds of topic with a bit of a barrier between you, the other person and the painful reality of the topic. We’re talking about Billy’s actions and their motivations and the influence on him, not your or me. It’s both real and abstract at the same time. But like, when you come in on bad faith and condemn a character and their fans for the character’s actions it’s genuinely damaging to everyone. To combat and undo things like racism, homophobia, transphobia etc people need to be able to have discussions and not be afraid that when they fuck up and parrot something they didn’t even know was wrong they’ll be crucified and publicly shamed for it. How is someone supposed to learn if they cannot ask?

I’ve been online for probably almost 20 years now and I’ve watched as fandom culture becomes more geared towards justifying dislike with largely half-understood irl moral and social justice arguments that come more from a place of wanting to somehow “win” over the opponent than from any interest in discussing the text or talking about those moral arguments genuinely. Editing Grace’s old posts to make her look like a bigot is not the morally superior stance, it’s weaponizing a culture of performative wokeness to harass a woman for the crime of liking a ship you don’t like (which is you know, a form of misogyny so I guess you gotta die too if you've done this sort of thing an the only response to shitty behavior is death).

If you lack critical thinking and the willingness to engage with and discuss difficult topics in good faith than you are part of the problem. You don’t have to like Billy but if you refuse to acknowledge that he is a product of a bigoted country, a bigoted and abusive father and a western mindset that’s been hurting everyone for centuries then you are part of the problem. Billy is nothing if not an excellent starting place in a genuine discussion on the intersections of abuse, bigotry, poverty, group think, deprogramming and queer coding. Because yes he’s queer coded, just because you don’t like him doesn’t make that untrue. Queer folk are not all perfect because you are one and the Hayes code has irrevocably changed how villains/antagonists are made. Traits that have been historically associated with queer folk were associated with villains thanks to the Hayes code and those associations are now baked into our media. Just look at any Disney villain.

If you cannot accept that the other person on the other side of the screen is a human and treat them as such then block the tag and keep scrolling. If you cannot comprehend that problematic media has its uses I cannot help you, you have to figure that out for yourself. I am not going to hold your hand and explain that the Handmaid's Tale being fascist and misogynistic is the Point and it's condemning those those things. But also I have no time for people who want to get bullshit wokeness brownie points for willfully letting things fly over their heads. I'm just gonna block you and you can take that as a win I don't care, I'm not arguing with people largely younger than me who don't have any interest in actually interrogating a text.

#train.txt #been thinking about this for awhile tbh

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