#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community

[brightgnosis]

Whining About Community Means Nothing When You Continue To Poison The Well

It never ceases to amaze me exactly how much the people in the Pagan / Witchcraft / Occult blogosphere here on Tumblr will whine, and haw, and cry about the "lack of community" here, and how "no one talks to one another anymore", and how "Tumblr's Witchcraft / Pagan / Occult Community is dying" ... But will then go on, afterwards, to continue making absolutely zero true and legitimate effort to correct that, or be the very change they constantly complain that they want to see in the Tumblr blogosphere.

They won't leave comments on posts- nor will they respond to comments left on their posts ... They won't send asks to people anymore ... They won't ask questions about things that are new to, intrigue, or even confuse them ... They rarely reblog anything that isn't another regurgitated "educational post"- and they certainly don't write any kind of original (non-educational, diary or journal like) posts about their own experiences or practices anymore, either (and instead always insist on branding themselves as Grimoires, Teachers / Educators, or Aesthetic blogs) ... They generally just refuse to build well networked community connections as a whole ... They no longer really bother to correct misinformation, or go out of their way to help practitioners find solid information- including referring them to practitioners who actually know the subjects being asked about.

Instead they repeatedly, actively, seem to go out of their way to be the exact opposite of everything that actually makes any kind of a community work and function.

Just throwing the barest bones hyper-regurgitated information (that's frequently incorrect, and sometimes made up of outright lies) out there, and stepping into lanes that often aren't even theirs in the process ... Handwaving away all legitimate educational or conversational attempts made in good faith as "to each their own" instead of actually fully engaging with peers and having dialogues about different ways of thinking, working, and being ... Expecting nothing short of absolute perfection even from the newest members- and being completely unwilling to accept any new information themselves, on top of it ... Acting in bad faith, with a bad attitude towards others; assuming everything said and done towards them is in bad faith, too ... Automatically blocking people for no legitimate reason- and frequently either (1) Without any actual interaction with them first; or (2) Just on an automatic assumption of foul play, bad faith, negativity, or general difference in method or belief leading them to act persecuted and be offended- when in reality they could've just asked for clarification; opened a dialogue and built a real bridge ... Making zero effort to actually speak to others around them and build bridges at all in general.

The list just keeps going on for eternity- and none of the actions are really good or conscionable.

Genuinely: How on Earth can you claim to want community when you maintain a vicious wall of self isolation which you refuse to let down for even a nanosecond, and are intent on being virulent and hostile towards the very people you would be in community with? Genuinely: How on Earth do you claim to desire interconnection and unity when you are completely unwilling to accept (or even tolerate) any amount of perceived difference in belief and practice- and are unwilling to attempt to understand or learn about those differences outside of the bubbles and echo chambers you have placed yourself in? Genuinely: How on Earth do you claim to stretch out your hand in Companionship when it is still stained red and you hide a knife behind your back, waiting for someone to make the first, slightest, perceived misstep so that you can attack them? Genuinely: How on Earth do you expect to build any semblance of community when you continuously tear down the very supports it needs to stand on in the first place? Genuinely: How on Earth do you claim to want community, when you do nothing but poison the community well where we would all drink in the first place?

To quote something I all too often have to, from a similar conversation had far too long ago on this very same platform (because we've unfortunately had it many, many a time, and the lesson never seems to get learned): "You cannot poison the well and then wonder why no one drinks from it" ... To form Community, you must first quit poisoning the well. Until you do that, you will never be able to do anything but continue whining about its lack.

This is an opinion piece based in 20+ years of experience. If you found this helpful or interesting, please consider Tipping or Leaving a Ko-Fi (being Disabled, even $1 helps); you can see my other "Original Content" here.

This account is run by a Dual Faith «(Converting) Masorti Jew + Traditional NeoWiccan» & «Ancestral Folk Magic Practitioner» with 20+ years of experience as a practicing Pagan and Witch. If that bothers you, don't interact.

#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Original Content #2023 #Original Social Content #Original Witchy Content #Communicating Beautifully

[dvzaiosamu]

Apple juice and Bandages. Soukoku fluff fanfic. This one is simply fluff, maybe ooc or not, I'm going to try to make their relationship accurate, if not, I'm sorry beforehand.

Trigger Warnings: mentions of drinking blood, skin cutting. Overall, fluff.

Soukoku! Vampire Chuuya Nakahara x Dazai Osamu. And the summary is: Chuuya is a vampire that likes to drink apple juice and Dazai it's just hanging out with him, trying to annoy him, as usual, but Chuuya and him have a surprisingly easeful moment until Dazai has a stupid idea that Chuuya isn't a big fan of.

Notes — By the way, even though Chuuya is a vampire, he won't burn to ashes when it's daylight, just to make sure you all understand. Also, this is like, not fake vampire fangs like Chuuya had in the Meursault, he has like real vampire fangs here.

Just one day, a day that was approaching night, but the sun continued to shine, illuminating the redhead's pale face. The birds sang as they rested on the branches of the weak trees, sharing a romantic and friendly moment as the night approached with the passing of the hours.

The two of them, walking in a pleasant silence, surrounded by Heathers and Amaryllis, flowers that managed to give the place a sufficiently calm atmosphere to be hanging around. The tranquility of the place gave them an unusual moment in their relationship in general, since normally Dazai always found one way or another to make the shorter one angry.

A wave of thoughts unites them, since each one, in the silence, wonders the same thing, why out of nowhere they are no longer arguing as usual. In any case, they were not going to deny that this moment was not pleasant, although it was difficult for them to accept that their presence made them be in a calm state, although only in moments as bizarre as this one.

"Hey, why are we so quiet out of nowhere? This is painfully unusual," the redhead decides to speak first, glancing sideways at Dazai.

"You ask me as if I knew..." the companion pauses, an exaggerated sigh leaving his lips. "You're probably just afraid of me, which is why you didn't want to talk the whole way."

A challenging but annoyed expression is present on Chuuya's face, who does not hesitate to respond: "What would I be afraid of anyway? Because nothing scares me about you, you're just a weakling, even if you can nullify my ability, still you aren't going to be able to defeat me so easily hand to hand."

Once again, an argument catches fire, and with each word more fuel is added to the fire.

Dazai shrugs, "Maybe, but you know damn well you can't kill me, you'd at least hurt me, but you'd never murder me."

"Are you becoming sentimental out of nowhere? Come on, please, don't make me consider killing you right now," Chuuya responds, although his eyes give it away, his irises give him away that he's not actually capable of killing him, and that's because of the strong bond that they have created over the years, which has not been seen on the outside, within them, the two of them know very well that they are one soul in the body of two.

A light smile appears on the brown-haired man's lips. His movements are carefree, not caring that his partner is not only a vampire, but also a human, within him he has a human, and although Chuuya still has a hard time calling himself one, Dazai will do everything in his power to do so, to make him reconsider he is a human being.

"You're not hungry?" Dazai changes the subject, ignoring the redhead's scowl. "There are some apples over here."

Soon, the shorter one's face becomes a little softer, and avoiding meeting his eyes, he says, "Since you say it, I could use some energy."

Immersed in a brief silence, Dazai deviates from the initial path and while Chuuya waited a few steps for him to return, Dazai had strangely offered to go himself and pick an apple from a tree and take the trouble to clean it with his clothes, before handing it to Chuuya,

"Here, take it."

"I hope you didn't poison it or something," he looks before gently circling the apple with his fingers, knowing how easily they can be damaged by pressure.

"I'm not the Evil Queen, you know? I'm not going to poison an apple to kill you, it's a boring death," he rolls his eyes and smiles playfully, his look dulcet but unnoticeable to the shorter boy.

Trying to trust the brunette's words, Chuuya sighs before taking a small bite just to taste the flavor, before finally sinking in his two fangs and beginning to drink the juice until it is dry and completely lifeless.

"See? It's good, I told you it's not poisoned," he smiles, and Chuuya raises an eyebrow, tossing the apple away.

"Are you stupid? Poison doesn't always act instantly, it can take a few minutes," Chuuya replies, wiping away the apple juice that ran down his chin. "You know, give me another apple."

"I told you you'd like it, Chuuya," Dazai puts his hand on Chuuya's shoulder, who immediately removes his hand. Without further ado, this time Chuuya follows the brunette towards the tree, and upon observing it he realizes that he won't be able to grab one. Another reason to be embarassed and be the next reason for Dazai to make fun of you. "Look, there are several, tell me which one you want and I'll give it to you."

"That one," he points.

"Okay," he replied, raising his hand to take the one the redhead pointed out to him. It was an ordinary apple, but he supposes that it is because of the color, it was green, standing out a little among the red ones. Dazai hands it to Chuuya, but not before making sure Chuuya sees him clean it with his clothes like he already did with the previous one.

"Thank you," Chuuya says in a calm voice, very unlike of him. With a plunge of his fangs into the apple, he begins to devour the juice in anticipation, the juice drains from the apple, rolling down his chin until it is left like the previous one, dark in color and dry. He throws it back to where the previous one was.

"Just look at you, your mouth is going to be sticky from the juices," he laughs softly before reaching into his pocket for some wet wipes so the redhead can clean himself up. "Here, so you can get the stickiness off your horrible face," he hands a wet wipes to his partner.

"My face? I'm sure my hygiene is better than yours," rolling his eyes, he wipes his chin with the refreshing wipes that smell like lavender and a few hints of fruit.

"You're so mean," he sighs.

When he finishes cleaning himself, he looks around for a trash can. Dazai notices this, since well, it wasn't a very clever move on Chuuya's part, who wasn't even trying to hide it, he just wanted to find a container to throw the wet wipe away.

"Chibi, are you telling me that you're going to throw the wet wipe in the trash but not the apples in the trash?" he gasps.

"Do you know how to use your mind or are you being stupid?" pauses. "It is an organic food, it is going to decompose at some point and some animal or weird bug will take advantage of it and eat it. And look, there's a trash can."

Chuuya goes to the trash and throws the wet wipe inside, making a disgusted face when he smells the malodorous that was there, immediately stepping back with a sound of disgust. "You know, we should leave now and be on our way..."

Dazai approached from behind, who with a smile affirmed with a "Yeah, sure" before walking again, although Dazai had a more unexpected destination to take Chuuya.

The light simply gave the impression that a dawn was approaching that was already noticeable, clouds with orange and yellowish tones, it looked like orange marmalade and the combination of colors of apples.

The brunette's hand timidly approaches the redhead's, and when he tries to grab it he is struck down by Chuuya's gaze, who manages to stab him with just one look, and with a little nervousness, he looks to the side to hide his face. He slowly blushed a light pink.

"You know, if you wanted to hold my hand, you could ask me, not just take it out of the blue," Chuuya says, sighing lightly.

"...I-I'm sorry," he says softly, clearing his throat softly before turning to look at him, still unsure if his blush could be seen by him or not. "You know me, Chuuya, that's how I... I am—!"

"Look at you, all blushed," Chuuya smirks, with a teasing undertone. "How adorable."

Before Dazai feels the heat rise to his cheeks again, with a pout he responds,

"Hey! Stop making me feel like that, okay?... I don't even know why I act like that out of nowhere," he finishes his sentence with a sigh. "You are very mean, slug..."

For the first time all day a small amused laugh is heard coming out of the vampire's mouth, wiping away the small tears that had just accumulated in the corners of his eyes, he smiles warmly and finally intertwines his fingers with Dazai's, leaving him silent. Likewise, Osamu didn't say anything else, he didn't want to sound too weak against Chuuya's touch.

"You know what? Let's rest there," Dazai adds, looking at Chuuya, but seeing that he is confused, he points his finger at the place. "There."

"Why? Are you tired already?" A mischievous grin remains on Chuuya's face as he lets himself be guided by Dazai, who directs him towards a large tree, in the shade more precisely.

"Maybe..." he shrugs, quickening his pace until he gets there and after watching the leaves move slowly in the small breeze, he carefully sits down on the grass, making sure not to sit somewhere dirty. "Now sit down and stop asking."

Rolling his eyes, Chuuya sits next to him, with a small smile that, although it stopped being so mocking, still looked warm like the sunrise. When he spoke, he could see his fangs, which Dazai found adorable, so adorable that he even had stupid fantasies that if Chuuya could bite him and drink his blood like the vampires from those movies.

"Chuuya," he says.

"What now, mackerel?"

"Do you think you could drink my blood?" An unexpected question and said so naturally that the redhead's eyes widen.

"I think you've gone crazy," he says immediately. "I would rather drink the blood of three decomposing bodies than drink your blood."

"But then Chuuya will get sick," he says with a puppy-dog ​​expression. "After all, you are a vampire, you still need human blood even if you drink apple juice."

"True, but not yours."

Although Dazai didn't care what his partner said, with a sigh and pressing his lips into a firm line, he stretched the cloth around his neck to make it more convenient for the redhead to suck his blood.

"So aside from the fact that you want me to drink your blood... You also want me to bite your neck to do so?" with a grimace he responds. "I will do no such thing, not even in your dreams."

"If it's not my neck," he stops stretching the fabric, "then you can bite my palm."

"Why are you so excited and so insistent about it anyway?"

"I can read you, Chuuya. It's obvious that you need human blood, just look at you, you haven't drank human blood in two days," Dazai muses, making Chuuya reconsider.

A brief silence takes center stage, and Chuuya thinks for a few moments about Dazai's offer. It's true that he's been weakened slightly by not being able to drink a human's blood, but he hates having to simply bite someone innocent. With a small sigh, he nods.

"Fine, but I don't like the idea, asshole," he frowns.

Dazai smiles in response, "Good then."

Reaching into his pocket, he grabs a small, black-handled knife. Chuuya's eyes widen, confused.

"Wait, what the hell are you implying?" Although Chuuya has told him to wait, the brunette pays no attention and slides the open pocket knife across the skin his palm. "Dazai, you idiot, wait, don't—!"

"Chuuya," he stops the redhead from intervening, and with an indifferent expression, he lets out an instinctive hiss as he sinks the pocket knife a little deeper before putting it back in his pocket. "I know you don't like to bite...so I did you a favor and took out the blood. Now shut up and drink before it falls down."

With a sudden movement, he grabs Chuuya's arm with his good hand and forces him to lean on his hand to drink the blood. With a grunt, Chuuya gently takes the brunette's bleeding hand and holds it gently, swallowing the blood that was beginning to slip.

"You're such an idiot sometimes..." he says in a muffled voice, caused by his mouth pressed into his palm.

Dazai grunts softly, "W-well... What can I say, It was neccesary."

Without getting a response from the redhead, he closes his eyes so as not to focus on the sharp pain, but still, it stings. With a shaky sigh, using his other hand, the one he grabbed Chuuya's arm with earlier, he places his hand on Chuuya's head, beginning to gently caress it.

Although Chuuya complains, Dazai only smiles weakly as Chuuya sucks the brunette's blood down his throat eagerly. The redhead did not expect that his partner's blood would have a sweet taste, similar to the nectar of an apple.

"I told you you'd like it, shorty..." Dazai mutters.

"Shut up... Let me clean your wound. How deep have you stuck the knife in, you idiot?" He slurred his words out.

"Enough to feed your empty stomach..." he replied.

With a small grunt, displeased by the action the brunette did, and by the physical contact he was applying to him, he simply continued swallowing the blood, with a tad of guilt building up inside him.

Once Chuuya felt that he had been full, he stopped devouring the scarlet liquid and licked the area about twice before separating, licking his lips after having tasted such a delicacy. Looking at Dazai's hand, he understands that it will need to be covered by another pair of bandages so that it doesn't get infected, so it's Chuuya's turn to have something to help his partner, and that's what he does, taking it out of his jacket pocket, a roll of bandages that do not stick to the skin and start unrolling it.

Dazai seems confused.

"Oh, seems like Chuuya has got bandages to heal me, how cute," he dulcetly says, and Chuuya in the meanwhile, starts to warp the bandages around Dazai's hand. "Why do you have these in your pocket?"

"I've got used to deal with your... wounds," his voice drops, a soft and concerned tone from him. "You know."

Upon noticing the redhead's expression, he does not hesitate to caress his cheek, delicately as if it were porcelain, being careful not to break it. "Aww... Do I really worry you? I'm sorry, chibi."

"Not the best time for jokes, Dazai," he states, finishing bandaging his partner, with tired eyelids. After taking his blood, he felt the need to rest for a while.

"Alright, alright, I'll shut up," he chuckles.

With the sun setting, the orange colors of the sky having darkened, Chuuya knew that it was already late, and that they should return, but he couldn't stay awake for much longer. With a yawn, he drops Dazai's now bandaged hand and rubs his eyes with his hand before collapsing into Dazai's lap.

"Would you look at that, the shorty has fallen asleep," he smiles. His hand rests on Chuuya's head, and he feels that his eyelids also feel heavy, perhaps the fact that a vampire, his companion, drank his blood has also weakened him considerably.

Before falling asleep next to Chuuya, he murmurs some words that seem like something affectionate, but since his words were almost not understood, it remains an affectionate mystery.

They both fall asleep, in the warmth of their bodies.

Notes. Now, you might ask yourself, what the fuck I was on while writing a vampire drinking apple juice and not blood... Well, you guys know Fluttershy from mlp, right? Well, the episode where Fluttershy becomes a vampire and drinks the juice of the apple, yeah. That was my inspiration to do this silly oneshot.

#bsd #dazai osamu #bungou stray dogs #osamudazai #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara #soukoku #dazai x chuuya #vampire chuuya #apple juice

[looklab]

Tips for Skin Care: My Top Ten List

The right skin health management tips can have the effect between having not terrible, but not great either looking skin and having the sort of skin that makes you the jealousy of everybody you experience. Assuming you are feeling that these skin health management tips are tied in with purchasing costly items, you were unable to be all the more off-base.

Having an everyday skin health management schedule that you follow strictly, as well as great in general wellbeing propensities will have the effect between harsh, dull-looking skin, and a smooth, crisp looking tone, regardless of what your skin type is. It doesn't require a ton of investment to execute these tips, however consistency is the key.

Assuming you are as yet youthful and have that ideal skin of youth, know that your looks are passing. On the off chance that you don't require some investment to appropriately focus on your skin now, in 10 or twenty years not too far off, you will plainly see the indications of disregard, thus will everybody you meet. Smoking, tanning and a terrible eating routine will leave you with a skin seeming to be a couple of beat-up shoes. That's what nobody needs, so plan to take great consideration of your skin now. Assuming you are more seasoned, you can't turn around the hands of time, however great healthy skin can assist with capturing the indications of maturing.

To follow are some incredible healthy skin tips to keep you looking new and beautiful, regardless of what your age is.

1) Avoid smoking, and toasting abundance.

It's fine to have an intermittent glass of wine or a mixed drink, yet overabundance drinking can progress in years you quick. The two cigarettes and liquor contain poisons that are awful for your skin. Smokers are very much noted for having untimely maturing due to continually tightening their lips around a smoke, and the destructive poisons in cigarettes. Smokers will by and large shape wrinkles at a lot more youthful age, and those that hit the jug hard will foster early kinks and have smudged skin.

2) Use sun insurance.

This can't be sufficiently expressed: Abundance sun openness will give you kinks and skin that looks more likened to your calfskin furniture than new and dewy. While certain individuals think they can't be without a "brilliant sparkle" from tanning, their skin will ultimately follow through on the cost.

Start applying a lotion with worked in UV security regular, not simply on bright days. Throughout the mid year when the sun is generally extraordinary, make a point to utilize sunscreen on any uncovered region of the skin, and make certain to conceal when the sun is at its top at noontime. Not exclusively will this keep your skin looking more youthful for longer, it will likewise assist with shielding you from getting lethal skin malignant growths.

3. Hydration- - It can't be expressed enough that this is one of the main keys to sound skin.

Your refreshment of decision ought to be water, not soft drinks or espresso, on the off chance that you need wonderful skin. You should hydrate reliably over the course of your day also. A taste of water now, yet nothing for quite a long time a while later prompts lack of hydration. Water flushes out pollutions, helps keep the skin saturated from the back to front, and furthermore assists you with controlling your weight.

4) Getting sufficient rest is significant for extraordinary skin.

Not in the least absences of rest show on your skin, it additionally influences your general wellbeing. In the event that you are overtired, you are not at your most useful at any rate, so why not throw in the towel, and get the rest you really want?

Getting sufficient rest will assist with lessening your feelings of anxiety and give your skin time to recover during your dozing hours.

5) Shedding to eliminate dead skin cells uncovers a fresher-looking coloring.

Your skin reestablishes itself by creating new skin cells and pushing old, dead skin cells to the outer layer of the skin. Peeling eliminates these dead skin cells, and uncovers more shiny skin concealing underneath old dull skin cells. Dry skin ought not be over-shed; on more than one occasion per week is adequate for that skin type. Slick and typical skin can take more regular shedding; maybe 3-4 times week by week. Try to utilize an exfoliant that is suitable for your skin type, and don't over-make it happen. Your skin is sensitive, so don't clean at it like it's the kitchen sink.

6) Toss out old healthy skin items.

Virtually all healthy skin items have a "utilization by" date, and it is vital to stick to it. The fixings in these item separate after some time and being presented to the air. In the event that you see moisturizers or creams isolating, or you notice an out of control smell from any of your skin health management items, dispose of them immediately. They are possible sullied with microbes, which can prompt skin bothering and break-outs.

7) Breaking point sodium consumption.

An excess of sodium gets dried out you, leaving you with wrinkly, matured looking skin.

8) Keep it clean- - Purify your skin morning and night.

A smooth chemical is best for dry-to-typical skin types, while slick, skin break out inclined skin might profit from an enemy of bacterial cleaners. Quite possibly of the most ideal course of action for your skin is to eliminate all hints of cosmetics prior to nodding off around evening time. This abstains from defiling your cushion, prompting breakouts.

9) Utilize a toner that is ideal for your skin type.

Toners eliminate any waiting hints of make-up and oil from the skin. This empowers your lotion to infiltrate the pores all the more really, and improve in the area of keeping your skin wet and solid. Assuming that your skin is on the dry side, skirt the toner on your cheeks. All things being equal, simply stroke it on with a cotton ball to the oilier region of your face; the brow, nose and jawline.

10) Utilize the right lotion for your skin type and use it loyally.

Slick skins need a sans oil, lightweight lotion, while mature skin that will in general be on the dry side can profit from a rich cream, especially around evening time. Stay away from creams with fake scents or colorants.

In the event that you have extremely dry skin, you might profit from lotions known as "humectants" as they attract extra dampness from the environment to mitigate dry skin.

11) Move it.

Practice carries blood and supplements to the outer layer of the skin, and perspiring eliminates debasements, so it is fabulous for your skin. Simply make sure to shower instantly when you are done to hold your pores back from being obstructed by sweat. This will forestall episodes and rashes.

Assuming you follow these healthy skin tips, you are well en route to the sort of skin that will be the jealousy of your companions as a whole, regardless of what your age.

For More Info:-

Skin Care Phoenix AZ

Best Med Spa Phoenix AZ

[evacado3]

Manipulator

One-shot Though I can't really say it's Yujinxreader

80% talking 20% plot 100% toxic

Word count: 770

Thoughts circled your head while laying on the bed, there wasn't a day passed by without thinking of him, and the life you chose to give up. You could say you might have been a little depressed after that, but it's been a year, almost time to move on.

The doorbell rang loudly, alerting you of some uninvited guests, "At this hour? It's 12am." you let an irritated sigh, moving out of the comfortable position you finally found.

Swinging open the door, you were ready to yell at whoever dared to visit this late.

"HEY WHA- Yujin?"

"Hey y/n, missed me?" he smiled, the two men following behind him were too familiar for your liking.

"You... Why, what are you doing here. Why would you bring those two, came here to kill me?" you snickered. Both of you knew that could never happen, you were more useful than them combined.

"Well well, I was expecting more of a warm welcome from our ex-informer. How's life after retiring?" that was a sarcastic low blow, especially when he knew the reason why you quitted.

Talking to him even after a year gave you immense pressure, your stomach was churning, and your face is basically red.

"That was low, say why bother coming this late."

"Would you mind if we let ourselves in first?"

-----

The air felt heavy where the four of you sat down, the larger man took out a vintage-looking wine bottle and a case that contained two glasses.

"I'm not drinking your poisoned shit." you deadpanned, there's no way anyone would risk playing games with Yujin.

He poured you some of the dark liquid anyways, returning to his seat after placing a notorious golden badge next to the glass.

"Yujin I-"

"Come back y/n, we need you." he leans forward with his elbows on the table, "Workers are facing a problem with the lack of evidence provided, only you could help."

"I'm retired ok, I'm sick of that environment. What I wanted while creating Workers hasn't shown in any of the affiliates and you used my information to kill people Yujin, murder." You emphasized the last word. That wasn't easy to let out, it's not easy saying 'no' to the person you love.

He chuckled before continuing, "But the talent's still there, and you didn't think I came empty-handed right?" Yujin signaled the other man, to which he responded by pulling out a black suitcase. "One billion won y/n, is that enough to hook you back?"

Your eyes widened, not in amusement. Does he think I could be bought with money? He thinks I'm that kind of person? Sure you had put on a facade to mask your feeling, projecting them onto the riches instead. But honestly, you wished he'd see more than that, into your real desires.

"You can make millions y/n, haven't you always been about money?" he convinced, and you didn't doubt him. Workers have gotten big now you've withdrawn from the business, the amount you could make just by agreeing with his offer is something some people may never earn.

"Yujin..." you stared down to your thighs. The thought of returning back to his side sounds too good to be true, but will he again ignore your ambitions? You knew Yujin doesn't play by the rules, the company has gotten big because of this. Though there's no way you could stop him, you're were, and will always be his stepping stone.

"Come back to me y/n, there are no cons to this proposal." he used a serious voice, is he sincere in asking for me?

Rejections are hard, you've always wondered how Yujin makes it look so easy. So you could only nod, the courage you build up to quit was broken down by his one request.

He openly smirked towards the other two men, giving them a small thumbs up to them under the table.

So, when is he going to stop using your love against you?

When is he gonna realize your attention has always been on him and not the money? That if there's anything he wanted, you'd climb more than mountains just to achieve it. And that if only he'd take your love seriously, you'd be his slave.

So why is he still using this toxic method, still manipulating your feelings?

"It's late, do you wanna stay her-"

"No, I'm leaving."

No hesitation in his harsh words. He gave you a genuine-looking smile, though it doesn't even reach his eyes, "I love you." he lied.

"I love you too." you answered, but with all the truth that laid in your heart.

====================

I'm getting no requests lmao so I'm working on my own ones, I'm was going to post a Jake one-shot but somehow did this first…

Can’t tell me Yujin isn’t toxic

And I guess I kinda got this idea from my oc's background

#yujin #fics #lookism #lookism webtoon #webtoon lookism #lookism x reader #lookism yujin #toxic #yujin x reader

[confused-stars]

I saw your tags for the Sign AU, and I can't stop thinking about the possible interrogation. Shigaraki is preparing himself for hours of grueling questions about locations, members, quirks, and plans. But then his favorite hero shows up and asks how he knows his sign name? It's been two hours and Shigaraki still doesn't understand why they are asking about this. He is confused. Aizawa is confused. And AFO has no idea about all the chaos a sign name has caused.

*clears throat* may i-

It must have been hours at this point. Tomura is sure, from how drained he feels and how tight his stomach is with hunger. They’ve offered him a sandwich, sure, but he wasn’t about to accept it. Especially since the handcuffs around his wrists were clearly created with him - or touch-based quirk users - specifically in mind: rather than hold his hands behind his back, or loosely in front, they force his palms together, fingers pressed against each other as if he’s praying, secured together with five sets of dual rings that wrap around his joints. It’s not uncomfortable, but it also leaves him just a little more helpless. If he wants to eat, someone will have to feed him, and he absolutely refuses to even entertain the notion.

Kurogiri is still out there. The League is still out there. They’ll come for him if only he waits long enough. They’ll find out where he is. He’s not being moved to Tartarus, he knows that much, because Sensei is there and they don’t want them close. 

He almost wishes they would move him. That they'd just give it up already. He hasn't said a word since they brought him in.

Well... that's not entirely true.

When All Might was here earlier, tired and skinny looking and... and pathetic, with no right to keep his head held high like that, and he called Tomura by a name that's not his (it's not, it's not, it's not), Tomura did snap at him to shut up. To 'fucking stop it'. He hated the kicked puppy look. the gentle words that felt like poison to Tomura's ears, because who does All Might think he is? Tomura Shigaraki is still a villain. Tenko Shimura is dead. When he spat that out, All Might's resolve hardened, and he began a more traditional interrogation. At that point, Tomura couldn't have answered even if he'd wanted to. He still can't speak, now. They obviously don't know that. It’s a weakness he’s not just going to admit to.

Tomura’s head jerks up when a set of steps actually stops outside the door. He shakes a loose strand of hair out of his face, hating that he can’t even brush them aside himself. Who is it this time? The detective with the lie detector quirk again? Or someone who can actually force Tomura to speak? How far are these heroes willing to go?

But the door opens, and it’s the one person Tomura can’t help but be shocked to see. Eraserhead.

Tired-looking as always, the scar underneath his eye a new addition from when Tomura last saw him in person. What’s he doing here? Tomura wishes he could ask. Instead, he just settles for a somewhat confused glare.

Eraserhead looks him up and down, expression unreadable. All underground heroes must have good poker faces, Tomura thinks. He wishes he had that ability. Tomura is not a good liar. He never needed to be.

“When’s the last time you had something to drink?” Eraserhead asks, hands moving to sign along, and, okay, is he here to play good cop? Playing off the begrudging respect Tomura has for him?

Tomura doesn’t move. He keeps glaring. Eraserhead sighs and approaches the table, dropping down in the chair opposite Tomura. He fumbles with a pouch on his belt for a moment, and eventually pulls out a juice box. It’s almost enough to make Tomura laugh at the absurdity - it’s the same brand Kurogiri buys. Eraserhead stabs the straw through the little hole on top and pushes it over on the table. Tomura looks down at the juice box, then up at him. He is thirsty. His throat is dry enough that swallowing hurts a little, and the sugar in the juice will definitely be helpful, and when the League comes to break him out, he’ll need to be in the best shape he can hope for. 

He sinks down in his seat the best he can, and stretches his head forward until he can catch the straw between his lips. It’s still humiliating, though better than someone holding it for him, and he looks anywhere but Eraserhead as he empties the juice box within seconds.

“Well, that’s a start.” Eraserhead slumps in his seat and sighs, sounding very world-weary. Tomura knows the man is only in his early thirties, but he seems to have been aging rapidly lately. That’s probably due to Tomura’s own actions. He wonders what Eraserhead sees when he looks at him. A victim to be saved, like All Might apparently thinks? Just a too skinny kid who is in over his head? Or is he actually smart enough to understand that Tomura doesn’t want, doesn’t need saving? That Tomura is the monster they should all be afraid of and he lives for it?

Maybe Eraserhead sees a little bit of both. Those eyes of his are very sharp. Tomura should have had the noumu take them, back at the USJ. Then his quirk wouldn’t have been a problem anymore either.

“I’d love to know what you’re thinking,” Eraserhead tells him, voice dry as Compress’ favored liquor.

Tomura raises a brow at him. Shrugs. Looks away.

Eraserhead is silent for a little while. The seconds tick by, though Tomura can’t be sure that his count is correct. There’s no clock in here. No window, either, of course. He has no way of telling how long he’s really been here. If he ends up falling asleep eventually, he’ll be completely lost. Hopefully his rescue comes before that.

“... Shigaraki,” Eraserhead says finally, slowly, “If you wanted to talk to me right now, would you be able to?”

Oh. Oh, no. Tomura knows they're being watched, but he doesn’t know how the detective’s quirk works, if he can detect a lie when it’s just communicated through a gesture... but even if he can’t... Tomura nodding right now would kind of prove Eraserhead’s point, wouldn’t it? So he sighs and gives a jerky shake of his head.

Eraserhead nods, clearly Tomura just confirmed what he suspected. Because unlike most heroes, Eraserhead actually has the brains to back up his quirk and fighting skills. "Detective, I'm going to need the key to those cuffs."

There's a crackle from the speaker in the corner of the room. "That doesn't seem like a wise idea."

Ah, arguing right in front of him. Tomura smiles lazily, even though he hates having his face exposed like this. They took Father and the others, of course. He's going to have to find them before they leave.

"I'll erase his quirk if he tries anything. You want him to communicate, don't you?" Eraserhead asks, a tad snappy.

There's a long pause, then the door opens and the detective steps through. He doesn't take his eyes off of Tomura, even as he hands Eraserhead a single, tiny key. Tomura returns his gaze with an outward calm that he's not feeling at all. He can't make them go back on this decision, he wants so desperately to have his hands free so he can scratch that incessant itch that's been growing worse and worse with each passing minute.

"You're going to let me take these off you without trying anything, right?" Eraserhead asks. They have no replacement cuffs, but those would be a farce anyway, wouldn't they? And if they want Tomura to sign, he'll need greater range than a standard set of them would allow him. He rolls his eyes and nods, presenting his folded hands to the hero. The detective watches for another moment or two, then steps back out, undoubtedly to continue observing.

It takes a little fumbling on Eraserhead's part to get the cuffs off, with all their little moving pieces, and he's either being very careful so he won't hurt himself on accident, or, less likely, so he won't hurt Tomura. Tomura's own eyes drift to his elbow and he wonders about the massive scar that must be hidden underneath that sleeve.

Finally, his hands are free, and gently glowing red eyes turn to his face.

Tomura ignores him for the time being in order to scratch at his neck, deep and thorough until he tears skin.

Eraserhead makes an aborted movement, as if to stop him, but then seems to change his mind, fist clenched atop the table. Good. If he wants Tomura coherent, he'll need to let him fight off the onset of another episode that's been looming for a while.

"Did All for One teach you sign language because of your nonverbal phases?" Eraserhead asks. It makes Tomura very aware of the fact that he doesn't usually do interrogations. This is none of the usual bullshit, talking around the point for ages. This is blunt and straight to the point.

Tomura gives a headshake.

Eraserhead waits, expectant.

Tomura thinks the hero is lucky he's bored and his is an innocent line of questioning and he actually respects Eraserhead. That's why he pulls his hand away from his neck and signs 'Sensei doesn't speak sign.'

"Who taught you, then?" Immediate, no hesitation. Why does he want to know this, of all things? Literally anything else would be more important. He may as well be asking how Tomura got so proficient at darts.

He sighs, and spells it out. 'K-U-R-O-G-I-R-I'

Eraserhead's brows draw together. "He taught you things? How long has he been around?"

Tomura presses his lips together and glares. Like hell is he giving them anything on the rest of the League. Especially Kurogiri.

The hero sighs. "Look, kid." Tomura scoffs.

"... Shigaraki. Back at the USJ, you used a name for me that's different from my official hero name. It's a name very few people know."

Now it's Tomura's turn to frown. He knows what the separate signs of Eraserhead's name mean, of course, and he's often thought they were odd, but seeing as his own sign name is also anything but villainous he didn't think he had room to judge.

'Your sign name?' he asks, 'Eraserhead?'

"No." The hero shakes his head and makes a series of signs. "Eraserhead." He then repeats the signs Tomura just used. "Shouta."

Oh. Well, that's awkward. Tomura gets the entirely absurd urge to apologize.

Having his sign name used by an enemy who very nearly killed him must be pretty uncomfortable for Eraser. Tomura would never want his enemies to know his own. It's private, and it was a gift that Kurogiri gave him. Even the rest of the League doesn't know it, they only know the one Tomura made up for himself, reusing the name of his quirk for it.

'Not many people know?' Tomura questions.

Eraserhead huffs. "Do I look like the kind of person who goes around sharing information like that?" Probably not, no.

Tomura nods. 'That's why you're here?'

"There's a lot that's odd about you, ki- Shigaraki. A lot that doesn't add up. This, in particular, is something that's been causing me some problems."

Oh.

Oh. Tomura can't help the laugh that breaks out of him, his voice returning only for the giggles that shake his shoulders. Eraserhead thought one of his trusted few had betrayed him. Had given the information to Tomura. That's too good. He almost wants to make him keep believing it. Or even tell him a lie, but, again, the detective is on the other side of the two-way mirror.

"I'm glad this is funny to you," Eraserhead says dryly, "Care to let me in on the joke?"

Tomura is still giggling when he signs, and maybe that's why he makes the mistake.

'Kurogiri taught me,' he says, 'But good to know I created some mistrust among you.'

Eraserhead is frozen in his seat. Even his quirk is inactive now, as Tomura suddenly realizes. He's held out pretty long. His eyes have got to hurt. Maybe Tomura can make him overextend himself. But there's too many guns nearby. Tranquilizers, no doubt. He wouldn't get very far, even if a kill or two would be satisfying.

'Can I have another juice box?' he asks, just to be difficult.

Eraserhead jerks out of his stupor. "Who... who did you say taught you?"

Did Tomura use Kurogiri's sign name on accident? Huh.

'K-U-R-O-G-I-R-I. Sign name: Kurogiri.' His hands form 'fluffy' and 'cloud' like they have a hundred thousand times. It's a cutesy name for someone who is not cutesy at all. But so is 'Dust Bunny' and so is 'Sleepy Cat'.

Eraserhead takes a shaky breath. His fingers are trembling when he signs 'Fluffy Cloud' himself. "Oboro," he says, "That's... what that... who that name belongs to. Shirakumo Oboro." He looks like he's very far away, but at the same time couldn't be more in the moment. He's pale, but his eyes are focused and dark. "Shigaraki. Tell me about Kurogiri."

It's in that moment that the door gets blown into pieces by a blast of blue flames.

And the shouting and running and destruction that follow don't really give them much more room for idle chit-chat.

#elflynns-horde-of-stuff #this has been sitting in my drafts for ages im so sorry #sign au #eraserhead is really going through it #man needs a break

[brightgnosis]

One more time, now- together, this time, please: Wiccans Are Not Your Boogeymen

People who use "Wiccans" as a catch-all term to ultimately encompass "practitioners I dislike or disagree with", and / or "practitioners who aren't a part of my tradition", and / or "practitioners who don't use the exact methodology I think of as being correct or valid", and / or "practitioners who are actively doing things wrong or dangerously" really need to take a step back and look at why:

➽ (1) They refuse to actually learn to differentiate actual Wicca from the Eclectic NeoPaganism commonly masquerading as Wicca due to capitalism and terminological ease-of-use (especially when most of the things they complain about on a legitimate Spiritual level is an issue with Eclectic NeoPaganism and not actually a problem with Wicca specifically, and they are incorrectly conflating the two with one another); and ...

➽ (2) They're so dead set on making Wiccans, specifically, "the bad guy" at every turn- and not actually "the exact and very specific people I'm actually talking about who perform the exact and very specific actions I'm talking about" (which are frequently not at all actually exclusive to any one singular group and are actually a widespread issue across multiple unaligned groups because it's an issue of culture and not actually an issue of religion or craft tradition).

Repeatedly throwing an entire (incredibly diverse) set of (near-completely independently organized and operating) religious traditions under the wheels of the bus- and doing so largely because you are too lazy to actually take the appropriate time to understand them, and have a very misguided bone to pick with outdated and incorrect information that you think you know about them? Will never be acceptable ... It's not acceptable for Christians to do to us (which y'all're always bitching about). And it's certainly not acceptable for us to do to each other.

"Wiccans" are not your Boogeyman.

"Wicca" is a word that honestly needs to be taken away from y'all at this point and put up on a damned shelf until y'all learn to actually use it correctly again.

#Personal #Wicca #NeoWicca #Paganism #Witchcraft #2023 #Religion & Magic #'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community

[brightgnosis]

People Deserve The Inherent Benefit Of The Doubt (At Least Initially)

The automatic assumption that, because someone is questioning you or giving you information or advice, they must "think you're an idiot" or are definitely "being condescending to you" is such a toxic, bad faith way to interact with the world around you. It's not even "so bad it's funny" levels of laughter. It's just outright depressing that people believe and act that way all of the time.

There are certainly cases where that is absolutely the genuine case of intent with some people. And it's typically pretty easy to actually tell when that's true in person (online you are so much better off just pulling up your panties and asking for simple clarification, rather than jumping automatically to bad faith interpretations) ... But trust me when I tell you that there are so many people in this world who just share information because they love people and want them to be safe, educated, or aware- or just because they see it as a means of forging intimate connections with people; because that is their way of being friendly, and of relating to humanity; because sharing knowledge is their love language.

No ulterior motivations, no hidden intent, no reading between the lines, no condescension, no nothing- just pure love. And that's true whether they know you or not.

People deserve the benefit of the doubt until it's definitively proven that their intent legitimately lays elsewhere and otherwise- and it's well past time we started remembering that and behaving in good faith towards one another again. Because reading everyone around you in bad faith automatically, every time, instead of just giving people the benefit of the doubt ... That they care. That they love. That they have your best interest at heart. That people are not fundamentally hateful, spiteful, or evil ... It doesn't make you a good person; you're not protecting yourself or "setting boundaries" with others, or any of the other justifications people use (I know, because I've used them all myself). You're just being a completely unnecessary asshole to people.

This is an opinion piece. If you found this helpful or interesting, please consider Tipping or Leaving a Ko-Fi (being Disabled, even $1 helps); you can see my other "Original Content" here.

#Original Content #2023 #Original Social Content #'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Communicating Beautifully #Being A Better Human Being #Keepsakes

[brightgnosis]

Hey there! I actually was able to think of a good one for you :D

I'm sure that over the years, you've developed communities of other practitioners--some large, some small, some online, some offline, etc.

In these spaces, what would you say is the biggest blessing of these communities, and what is the biggest bane? Are these unique to magical spaces, in your experience?

It'd probably surprise a whole lot of y'all to find out that I've been pretty much cut off from any kind of Pagan / Occult / Witchcraft community for ... Basically my whole life.

Aside from a roughly 6 month stint in Fort Walton Beach, Florida (when I wasn't there long enough to settle down, let alone try to connect to locals); and a 3 year stint in Tulsa (when I experienced nearly every kind of abuse from my partner, and it probably would've endangered me to try- if I'd even had a vehicle to do so in the first place)? I've literally lived in the same small agricultural town in the middle of nowhere since I was 6. And there is nothing here.

I knew a handful of people involved in the craft growing up. I can count their names on both hands and still have fingers left; 4 of them were my own friends, and the rest were my Aunt's coven; I've never had contact with any kind of a broader "Pagan Community". Hell, I've only ever been to one Pagan Pride event in my entire life- and I've only ever stepped foot into maybe 5 Metaphysical Shops total ... I just never had the opportunity to.

I tried to get involved with my local community now that it's larger and there are easier ways to connect with others ... Only to immediately run into a group of stuckup, power hungry assholes who've apparently decided they run the entire joint because they put on a Pagan Pride "for us" twice; a group who can't even remotely handle anyone questioning them- but especially not a disabled person; they removed me from our local pagan FaceBook group for asking legitimate safety questions about their last event. So I washed my hands of them. I'd rather be solitary, then.

I've tried to be involved in (and even tried to create a couple) online communities, too ... But I keep seeing them fail (or get outright napalmed) over and over and over again due to the same problems; power games, infighting and backbiting, purity culture, personality cults, severe inexperience, poor organization, and no idea what community organization actually means- let alone no clear cut idea of what they want to provide as a community. So I wash my hands and step away.

I've been involved in a lot of discussions both online and off, too, with several types of practitioners, about what community means; what it needs; how to form one; how to make it self-sustaining; etc. But they never go anywhere. Nothing ever gets done. Things fizzle and fall apart for one reason or another (infighting, power games, lack of funds, disinterest, flakiness, etc) and things never get off the ground.

Community can be lovely, and wonderful, and helpful, and formative ... We need community ... I desperately want community ... But I haven't been impressed with a single thing I've seen so far in what attempts I've made online and off. If anything, my limited experience and attempts have shown me that (current) Pagans simply aren't capable of creating good, solid, well developed community. And I feel like there's a lot of reasons for that which hearken back to Pagan Persecution Complex, and a number of other issues I've griped about over the years.

And honestly? At this point I'm just kind of tired of trying to find my place in communities I never even had access to until recently. I'll still put people in their place when they whine about "not having community" while doing all the things that destroy community- or not actually bothering to take any of the steps to create it ... But ultimately, at this point we seem to have gotten on just fine without one another for 20+ years. I feel like we can probably get on fine without one another for another 20+ more unless something actually changes for the better finally.

I've made peace with that.

#fenderblender #Answered Asks #Witchcraft Asks #2024 Asks #2024 #Religion & Magic #'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community

[brightgnosis]

So tired of finding absolutely lovely blogs that seem like they'd be great to get to know, only to have to turn around and immediately block them because they're yet another user with some "Wiccans DNI" nonsense on their blog.

Your wish is certainly my command, but when are y'all going to grow up already instead of continuing to encourage this ridiculous (and frequently uneducated) infighting? This is exhausting.

#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Personal #2023 #Religion & Magic #Oklahoma

[brightgnosis]

If you think that someone very simply educating you on the history of your own community, and something that you're specifically complaining about at the moment in particular, is "responding to your post like it's supposed to be a peer reviewed publication" and "treating you like you're supposed to be an encyclopedia of knoweldge"? Then I feel incredibly sorry for you and whatever incredibly fucked up emotional damage you have and clearly need healing from. And I genuinely wish you the best on that healing journey, and hope you eventually find the peace you need.

But seriously ... Y'all bitch around the clock about the lack of community, but y'all can't even handle basic things like the history of your own community (which is such a simple thing it's not even funny. But it's so important, because the last decade of it has been intentionally erased and ignored and it's led to a lot of issues). And when basic communication happens- whether that is a correction of something you've said, the gifting of additional information and context relevant to your topic, or a genuine question that may seem to challenge your practice or perception, etc? You literally turn into the most unhinged, vitriolic little children at the drop of a pin.

And y'all truly wonder why there is no more "Witchblr" anymore.

#spooniesecular #'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Personal #2024 #Witchblr #Paganblr #Wiccablr

[brightgnosis]

I love how much you work to build community here on Tumblr, especially for us newcomers. What is your favorite thing about "new" Tumblr, and what do you miss most/want to bring back from "old" Tumblr?

I love unlimited asks, improved DM functions, comments / replies on posts, and non-rebloggable post options; we old hats fought for these features for nearly a decade, and I'm so happy to finally have them. Especially since they increase community participation and allow people to pick how they want to communicate with others on levels that are most comfortable to each person individually. And that concept is so important to me.

What I miss about old Tumblr, though, is the fact that is was so much more communicative and we had such an incredible etiquette system. But all of that's been largely lost now; it's like we got all of these features and then community stagnated. Not because we got them- but because we got them too late. Most of the communities had already become toxic and imploded in on themselves- and that's incredibly difficult to come back from.

On top of that, instead of teaching newbies how to use these features, and teaching people our etiquette ... We just shame them into reblogging things. Which is so detrimental, honestly, because reblogging has always (no matter what anyone fearmongers you into believing) only ever been, like, a small quarter of the way community has interacted on this site. And by only focusing on reblogging to "keep this site alive", we've effectively been killing not only the new features we fought tooth and nail for over the last decade- but also the other features that've been original to the site this entire time, and have always played a significant role in the site's function and community alongside reblogging.

It's kind of depressing.

#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #eldritchboop #Answered Asks #2023 Asks #2023 #Electronic Nightmare #Misc Asks

[brightgnosis]

I keep joining groups because I desperately want to interact with my communities. I want to be around people. I want to make friends. I want to help build something good ... But God, people are always just so venomous over such small things these days. All the time; it's so constant- even in spaces you think won't be like that. But they are. They always are. It's literally the same nonsense over and over and over again.

"The definition of Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results" and all that, but it genuinely didn't always used to be like this ... When did the world get so hateful about everything? When will it finally stop?

#Personal #2024 #'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Communicating Beautifully

[brightgnosis]

Y'all Need To Learn To Stop Being So Inherently violent.

I am so over immediately being read in bad faith. I'm going to start calling people on the fact that behavior is ultimately bullshit.

We need to stop that ... Genuinely ... If we have any legitimate care for this community at all we actively need to stop reading everything in bad faith; we actively need to stop assuming that every comment that's short, or which seems curt (both especially on a character capped platform), or which contains any amount of sarcasm, etc, is automatically rude, "bitchy", or mean spirited, and so on- and then sniping at people, being mean back, or otherwise going after them (especially before it's even confirmed that was actually even their intent in the first place).

This is what social media wants from us. It wants us divided. It wants us fighting each other every day. Because rage bait is a far better motivator than any amount of kindness, compassion, or generosity for engagement and interaction with their platform ... But we actively need to be better than that. Not just because in general we need to divorce ourselves from the stranglehold of social media and its conditioning for the sake of our overall sanity, health, and growth as individuals- but also because our fellow community members and Human Beings deserve better from us in the first place.

Purity Culture ... The refusal to participate in healthy, open, honest communication and check-ins with one another ... Permanent bad faith reading ... The constant treatment of not only other people as content machines rather than Human beings- but ourselves as well, and the expectation we not only produce, but constantly be producing for others instead of for ourselves ... Constant hypervigilance ... The desire to run around being snot-nosed and egotistical children, always policing the community for the tiniest perceived wrong ... The way in which we overanalyze, misrepresent, and refuse to actually read what we are looking at ... None of it's actually conducive to (re)building the community that I see so many people claiming that they want here.

I will continue to say it as many times as it takes: If that's what you genuinely want, like you say it is? Start acting like it. But more importantly: Start actually treating others like it. Because a simple comment is not always an invitation to battle. The vast majority of the time it's just an invitation to be a Human Being.

This is an opinion piece. If you found this helpful or interesting, please consider Tipping or Leaving a Ko-Fi (being Disabled, even $1 helps); you can see my other "Original Content" here.

#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Witchcraft #Magic #Paganism #Pagan #Wicca #Being A Better Human Being #Original Content #2023 #Communicating Beautifully #Original Social Content

[brightgnosis]

If a person cannot solve a conflict with a friend, how can they possibly contribute to larger efforts for peace? If we refuse to speak to a friend because we project our anxieties onto an email they wrote, how are we going to welcome refugees, immigrants, and the homeless into our communities? The values required for social repair are the same values required for personal repair.

And so this discussion must begin in the most micro experience. Confusing being mortal with being threatened can occur in any realm. The fact that something could go wrong does not mean that we are in danger. It means that we are alive. Mortality is the sign of life.

From Conflict is Not Abuse: Overstating Harm, Community Responsibility, and the Duty of Repair, published 2016; Sarah Schulman

#Quote #Conflict is Not Abuse: Overstating Harm Community Responsibility and the Duty of Repair #Sarah Schulman #Being A Better Human Being #Communicating Beautifully #'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community

[brightgnosis]

i think it's important to let you know the person you were referring to is autistic and openly admits on their pinned post that they sometimes misinterpreting tone and intention difficult, so it's possible they misinterpreted you

i also don't think they were intending to be passive aggressive. to me it just looks like they were giving you context to why they believe it was racist

Hey Anon. Yes, I'm familiar with this user and we used to be mutuals at one point. I'm aware they're Autistic. I'm Autistic too, and I'm quite open about that on my blog. It's not exactly a new thing around here.

"Not my fault it's 70+ year old white people who admit that they were raised to believe it refers to the [Creek Indians]" is very much, 100%, passive aggressive language that absolutely implies I've somehow blamed them for believing a(nother) false etymological lie concocted about the SAE dialect ... By simply thinking something didn't add up right based on my knowledge of SAE's past history with false racialization in etymology, questioning the claim's legitimacy (especially given how many people were likewise confused by the claim), doing my due diligence (as one damned well should on the internet, especially when things don't seem to add up right) and Googling it, and then coming back with an answer / correction when it proved to be incorrect — all of which was documented in real time on that post.

If that wasn't their actual intent despite that being exactly what that kind of phrasing means in typical communication, then fine ... But if that's genuinely the case, then they need to actually put forth the effort to learn proper communication skills and how not to speak passive aggressively to people (something which is perfectly within the capabilities of us Autistics)- not blame their Autism for ultimately making them treat other people like shit.

Especially since you don't just randomly misinterpret something like that as a direct personal attack on you, and as someone personally directly blaming you specifically for "failing to be correct" or "failing to have a good source" (or whatever), unless you're just the kind of person who actively does that in your daily life in general because (1) you just generally have some kind of a victim complex overall; (2) Generally just can't handle basic corrections in the first place; or (3) Are the kind of person who typically reads communications in bad faith as a default overall.

I know, because I used to be that kind of person. And I don't know which they fall under (if any to begin with) — but I don't actually care if I'm being honest, because I've already implemented the Two Response Rule; the conversation's already over, and the topic's already closed ... But I do know that Autism has nothing to do with any of it- and it's not an excuse for that behavior, either.

Now, again, I've already activated the Two Response Rule. That means I've said my peace on the subject- and in doing so I've determined that minds won't change and / or the exhibited behavior's made the conversation untenable and unsustainable. I don't care to keep talking about it, and I don't care for bullshit excuses about / surrounding why any of it turned out the way it did, either ... It is what it is, and regardless of what's what, the case is now closed. That's all, folks.

So I'm going back to my Sims game now, and any further Anons from you on the topic will be blocked. Have a good day.

#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Anonymous #Answered Asks #2023 Asks #2023 #Academia #Misc Asks

[brightgnosis]

You know. Everyone always says they want community- and yet one thing remains a perpetual constant among us: Everyone is always rude and cruel to one another and reads everything in bad faith all of the time- or they're completely unresponsive when you either don't give them the answer they want to hear, or don't otherwise kiss their ass about things.

Very similarly to how many people say they “want to be educated about Wicca” but really only actually want their Anti-Wiccan biases confirmed for them ... The truth is, no one actually wants a genuine community ... What y'all really want seems to be a fan club. And honestly it's just tiring to be constantly lied to and treated like you're the problem for actually taking people at their word.

#'You Can't Continue To Poison The Well Then Wonder Why No One Drinks' When Creating Community #Personal #Religion and Magic #Being A Better Human Being