Tumgik
#[ i've been ... a bit all over the places lately
golden-cherry · 2 days
Text
deal - cl16 (28/?)
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader
Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.
Chapter Summary: Your pillow is comfortable - just like Charles' lap.
Warnings: 18+ (dry humping, mentions of sex), fluff, tiny bit of angst, Lando is a little shit
Word Count: 4.5k
series masterlist
previous part
A/N: since you were all so patient with me - you deserve this. I hope you're sat, because y/n definitely is. feedback is appreciated!
Tumblr media
"Good morning, mon amour," Charles whispers softly in your ear before you feel a faint puff of air against your cheek. Something soft and warm presses gently against your temple. "It's still quite early. You can go back to sleep if you want to." He rests his chin on your shoulder and you feel his chest against your back. "I'd like to go jogging, if that's okay with you."
Sleepy - and confused - you snuggle further into your comfy pillow. It's still dark in the room, but through the window you can already see the horizon changing color and announcing a new day. You yawn tiredly and close your eyes again. "You're waking me up to tell me you're going jogging? Are you crazy? Couldn't you have just written me a note or a text?"
Charles exhales through his nose. "I'm sorry, chérie. There was no other way. I have an appointment with my trainer and I'm already late." He gently puts his hand on your bare hip, where the shirt has ridden up and exposed a sliver of your skin. "All you have to do is let go of my arm and then I'll be gone and you can go back to sleep."
Your pillow moves almost imperceptibly beneath you and you raise your head to examine it, puzzled. You realize that you have been lying on Charles' arm and your hand has found its place on his forearm. You suppress a smile as you lie back down and press your cheek into the soft inside of his upper arm. "Nope. Unfortunately not possible. I'm afraid your arm is too comfortable for me to let you go right now."
Charles's fingers press a little harder into your hip, but his arm stays in place. "I won't be long. I promise." 
Drowsy and not fully conscious, you turn in his arms and lift your leg, only to wrap it around his waist and press yourself against him. The tip of your nose touches his bare chest. "You said yesterday that we would continue to share a bed so that I could sleep better. So you have no choice but to stay here with me." As you absentmindedly kiss his chest and press your hip against yours, you feel warm.
Charles laughs softly, but doesn't disagree with you. Instead, his arms wrap around you a little tighter. The hand that was on your hip a moment ago slides up your spine under your shirt. His fingertips dance over your warm skin until his hand rests gently on the nape of your neck, where it lingers lightly. "As far back as I can remember, I said I'd hold you in my arms if it meant you'd sleep better."
You gently lift your head from his chest so that you can look at him. Charles' eyes are closed, but a slight smile pulls the corners of his mouth upwards. "You do realize that you're digging yourself in deeper, don't you?"
He slowly opens his eyes and looks down at you. Without hesitation, he rolls you onto your back. You feel his weight on top of you as his hand disappears from your neck and rests against your thigh, keeping your leg wrapped around his waist. "How silly. Looks like I've lost now." 
His weight on you, his warm breath on your face and his fingertips disappearing under the hem of your shorts cloud your thoughts. You look at him from under your eyelashes and have to swallow as his gaze darts from your eyes to your mouth and back up again. "How silly."
He opens his mouth slightly and he's so close to you that you can make out the different shades of green in his irises despite the darkness. His beard shades his beautiful face and you want to rub your cheek against it. Or feel the stubble on your thighs. Or - 
Charles leans so far down towards you that the tips of your noses touch. As he licks his lips, you think you can feel his tongue on your mouth. But maybe you're just too tired and imagining it. "I'd love to stay in this bed with you forever," Charles whispers, and as his fingers slide a little higher under your shorts, almost touching the curve of your ass, you involuntarily arch up towards him. Just as you think you can feel the hardness of his abdomen, he pushes himself off the bed with his other hand and pulls away. "But I really need to go jogging." A brief moment later, he stands in front of the bed and scratches the back of his neck. "I thought I might go grocery shopping afterwards. Just text me if you think of anything else you might need." 
Distracted by the warmth in your lower belly, you stare at him as he slips into the sports shorts you were wearing yesterday morning. His smell clings to you and you can't think straight as he sits down on the edge of the bed to pull white tennis socks over his feet. You push the covers off you and crawl across the bed to him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. Your hands rest on his warm chest. "You're mean, Charles." You brush a kiss on the soft skin under his ear and can feel his heart skip a beat.
He pauses in his movement. "You haven't called me that in days." He tilts his head a little so he can look at you. 
Puzzled, you return his gaze. "What do you mean? I always call you Charles."
Slowly, his fingers wrap around your wrists so that he can wriggle out of your embrace. But only so that his arm can wrap around your waist and he can pull you onto his lap. As you sit astride his thighs, he cups your chin with his thumb and forefinger so you have no choice but to look at him. 
He shakes his head slightly. "You called me Charles. English pronunciation. You've been calling me Charles since we had dinner with the others the other night."
You raise an eyebrow and squirm on his legs under his unyielding gaze. "And what did I call you now?"
"Sharl. French pronunciation." A glint sparkles in his eyes. 
"Is that good? Or bad?" you ask unknowingly and innocently, running your fingers through the short hair on the back of his neck. 
"What do you think?" His voice is no more than a whisper as his other arm wraps around your back and pulls you completely onto his lap so that you can barely move. Once again, his fingers slip just below the hem of your pajama shorts, fingertips almost digging into your flesh as he presses your crotch against his noticeable bulge. So hard that you might end up with bruises on your hips. But you don't care. You gasp in response. "Do I like this or not?"
The warmth that was previously spread throughout your body moves south, and you feel your arousal pooling in your shorts. The word friendship flashes faintly in your mind, but as Charles gently but firmly moves you over his hard-on and a low moan escapes his throat, you can't help but block it out completely. 
"Charles," you almost whine as you rock your hips back and forth without a thought and the tip of his brief-clad cock nudges against your clit. Electricity flashes through your veins and your skin burns where Charles touches you and you close your eyes, flushed with pleasure. 
"Nuh-uh." Charles's hand moves from your chin to the column of your throat and rests just at the base of your neck. "Look at me, mon amour." His voice is deep and smoky as he makes you look into his eyes. Through half-opened eyes and with his mouth open, he grinds you over his boner, his breath stumbling and warming your face as you can do nothing but surrender to the sensation. 
Never in your life have you desired someone as much as Charles. Charles, exhaling as if relieved that he can release some tension, while your fingers dig into his shoulder blades to make sure he doesn't stop. The hem of your pyjamas and his boxer shorts rub so deliciously against your bundle of nerves and you moan shamelessly as the gorgeous man beneath you bites his lower lip, wishing it was yours he was nibbling on. 
"Charles, please," you beg, even though you don't know what for. You want his fingers on your throat, his mouth on yours. You want to feel how soft his lips are as he slides his cock home until you fall apart on him. You want to hear him say how good you feel, how much he desires you and that he lo-
"Fuck," Charles snaps you out of your thoughts, and before you can realize it, he releases his arm from your body and leans to the side, where his phone is on the edge of the bed, ringing. 
When you see the panic in his eyes, you quickly slide off his lap and cover yourself with the blanket again. All of a sudden you feel vulnerable and naked, even though you're still wearing the shirt and shorts. You interlace your fingers in your lap. 
"I'm sorry, Andrea." Charles tucks his cell phone between his ear and shoulder as he slips on the turquoise Puma shirt you were wearing yesterday morning. He lifts the hem once and smells it, and for a brief moment his eyes flicker to you before he hurries out of the room, leaving you alone in the bedroom. You hear him continuing to talk in the hallway.
Startled and a little repulsed, you sit on the bed. How did you let it get this far? Charles is your best friend - a fact you told Joris and which was later confirmed to you in person by your roommate. 
So why did you just fall over each other like teenagers who can't keep their hands off each other when no one is looking? Why did you allow yourselves to dry hump each other when you are nothing more than friends? Why did everything Charles did and said turn you on so much that the inside of your thighs are sticky with your arousal? And why did it feel so damn right?
You run your hand through your tousled hair. You've never felt anything like you have in the last few minutes. You've never desired someone as much as the man whose touch made you turn to putty in his hands. As if your brain had been switched off, you gave yourself to him without thinking about what the consequences might be. 
What would happen now? Would Charles still talk to you? Would you talk about it? Would it happen again? 
Before you can think about it any more, Charles enters the bedroom again. His feet are now in sneakers and he has put on a jacket over his shirt. When he sees you sitting at the head of the bed, the comforter thrown over you and with big, worried eyes, his gaze softens. He crosses the room in three steps and sits on the edge of the bed with you before reaching for yours with one hand and intertwining your fingers. 
"We're okay, aren't we?" he asks gently, lifting your chin with his free hand as you try to avoid his gaze. When you look at him, the sparkle from a moment ago is still there. "I - I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let it get this far. We're friends and the last thing I want is to lose you over this." He almost stumbles over his words when you don't say anything back. "We're still friends, aren't we?" You can see tears gathering on the line of his eyelashes. 
You are so relieved that you want to hug him. You smile at him. "Of course we're friends, Charles. Best friends," you assure him, ignoring the shiver that runs down your spine. "There's nothing that could change that."
The man in front of you blinks away the tears and returns your smile before squeezing your hand twice. "I really have to go now. Like I said, if you need anything from the supermarket, please text me. Then I can pick it up for you." He releases his hand from yours and stands up from the bed. "See you later." He leans forward a tiny bit and you can practically see the gears in his brain turning until he merely smiles at you and then disappears. As the apartment door slams shut behind him, you exhale. 
Everything's fine between you, you tell yourself as you unplug your phone from the charger and glance at the clock. 9:30 am. You could go back to bed and sleep, but as you lay your head on the pillow, the smell of last night's smoke creeps into your nose. The whole bed smells like a campfire, and your skin and hair smell like you've been wallowing in ashes, so you decide to wash the sheets and jump in the shower. 
The washing machine makes a gentle whirring sound as you switch it on and then head to the fridge to prepare yourself a little breakfast. However, when you realize that there is nothing in the fridge that would be suitable, you hang your head in resignation. Apparently, the ingredients Charles used for the pancakes yesterday were the very last leftovers, so the fridge is empty apart from a pickle jar and a few bottles of water. 
Without further ado, you shoot Charles a text to ask him to bring something for breakfast before you gather your bathroom utensils from your suitcase in the bedroom, undress in the bathroom and set the water in the shower to the right temperature. Since you have some time before Charles returns from his jog and the supermarket, you take all the time in the world. You shampoo your hair and rinse it thoroughly before leaving a generous amount of conditioner in your hair. Meanwhile, you exfoliate your body, shave carefully - and actually manage not to cut your knuckles. The lavender and vanilla shower gel soothes your frayed nerves, while you keep telling yourself that everything is fine between you and Charles, like you talked about. 
You banish the feeling that his every touch felt good and right to the back of your mind and as you turn off the water and wrap yourself in a soft towel, it's almost as if nothing ever happened between you. 
You focus on the fact that you have to look good today, because you are invited to Charles' mother's for dinner later, so you spend a lot of time taming your hair and picking out a nice outfit. You decide on a pair of dark jeans and a light blouse and button up the last button as your cell phone beeps on the kitchen island. 
Charles: No problem. I think I'll be home in an hour. It'll be too late for a proper breakfast then, but how about some fruit and yogurt?
And indeed. It's now just after 12 o'clock and the washing machine seems to be doing its last spin cycle, because its humming gets louder before it goes quiet and only beeps a few times. You quickly put the wet bed sheets in the dryer before answering Charles.
You: You're the best. See you soon.
While you wait for your roommate to come home, you rummage through the things Kika picked out yesterday and scatter them around the apartment. You put the fake plants on the windowsill in your room and place a vase on the worktop in the kitchen. Then grab some picture frames and stand in the hallway to find out which places on the wall are suitable for which frame. Charles is sure to have enough beautiful photos from all over the world to decorate your home, because unfortunately you don't yet have any pictures together that you could hang on the wall. But that's okay. After all, you've only been friends for a few days. 
When the front door opens a short time later, two men are standing opposite you, one of whom - thank God - is Charles. When he sees you, a smile spreads across his face. 
"We've done some shopping," he explains, lifting the bags he's holding in his hands. Then he looks at the man next to him. "This is Andrea, by the way, my personal trainer and close friend." He walks towards you and briefly looks you up and down. "You look good," he says casually as he walks past you and glances over his shoulder. "Come on, Andrea. The stuff needs to go in the fridge. 
"Don't stress me out like that," the man in front of you replies, rolling his eyes in an annoyed manner. "I'm Andrea, nice to meet you." He places one of his bags on the floor before holding out his hand to you. 
You introduce yourself to him too and shake his hand. " Likewise. I wasn't expecting you to bring half the supermarket with you," you joke, reaching for the bag he's put down before you both head towards the kitchen. 
"Me neither," Andrea replies, shrugging her shoulders. "Charles insisted because he didn't want you to want for anything. Now that you live here too."
"Andrea," Charles warns his friend as he puts the milk and eggs in the fridge. 
"Don't play pretend," he defends himself and puts his bag down on the worktop. "I'm just repeating what you said." He takes your plastic bag from you and puts it on the worktop too. "I'll leave you two alone then. After all, you've got a lot to do today." He turns in your direction and smiles at you before planting a kiss on your cheek left and right. "It was nice meeting you, but I'm afraid I have to go. But I'm sure we'll be seeing more of each other."
"I guess so."
He nods briefly, turning to your roommate. "And you let me know about the trip. Then I can arrange everything."
Charles, who is putting food in the fridge with a concentration as if he were taking part in a Tetris competition, waves his hand once in the direction of his trainer. "I will. Ciao!"
Andrea leaves your apartment as quickly as he had arrived, and as the door slams shut behind him, you turn to your friend. "A trip? Where are you off to?"
"I have to go through a training camp to prepare for next season. But I'll tell you about that later." After he's put everything away neatly, he closes the fridge and turns in your direction. "I've just spoken to my mother on the phone. Dinner will be around seven, but we can come over before that, before my brothers show up, if you don't mind." He grabs a glass from the cupboard and pours himself some water before taking a big gulp. "So I'd just jump in the shower and get ready. And then we can go as soon as you're ready."
You smile at him. "All right. Do you still want to eat something small? Then I could cut up some fruit and prepare some yoghurt if you like," you offer. 
He nods thankfully to you before pulling his shirt over his back and off his upper body in one fluid motion. The workout has made his muscles look even more defined than usual. Not that you waste much time staring at his naked torso. 
"That would be nice. I'll just jump in the shower," he says before disappearing into the bathroom. As he turns on the shower, you hear the water hitting the floor. 
You're a little surprised that your little session doesn't seem to be having any effect. The worries you had that the atmosphere between you might now be strained fizzle out and the only thing that remains is the bitter aftertaste that Charles doesn't seem to be bothered by the fact that you were dry humping as friends and there was a possibility that your friendship had come to an end. 
Does it really not affect him that you were both playing with fire a few hours ago? Or is he just good at covering it up and acting as if nothing had happened?
But when you remember how upset he was sitting next to you on the bed afterwards, with tears in his eyes for fear of losing you as a friend, the negative thoughts disappear from your mind. He probably wants to put the whole thing behind him because it would really bother him if you were no longer friends. 
And since you feel the same way, you cut up some fruit without giving it a second thought until your cell phone, which is lying on the kitchen island in front of you, vibrates. An incoming Facetime call from - Lando? 
Why is he calling you? And especially on Facetime? Has something happened to him? Does he need help?
You quickly put the knife aside and wipe your hands on a kitchen towel before answering the call. When the British man's face appears on your screen, you breathe a sigh of relief. He's apparently lying on the couch at home, the hood of his hoodie pulled up over his curls and a broad grin adorning his face. 
"Hi, Lando," you greet him and lean your phone against the vase so that you can continue preparing the fruit. "What can I do for you?"
"Is Charles with you?" he asks as you turn around and take two bowls from the cupboard behind you to divide the fruit halfway between them. 
"He's in the shower," you reply, tilting your head. " Why? Did something happen?"
"No, everything's fine," he says and smiles. "I was just trying to reach him on his cell phone. But when he is taking a shower, it's obvious that he won't answer." 
"'Who's not answering?" you hear Charles say as he leaves the bathroom wrapped in a towel. Single drops of water snake across his chest and down the ridges of his abs before disappearing into the fabric of the towel, which hangs quite low on his hips. You have to swallow briefly and just point at your cell phone. When Charles comes into Lando's field of vision, he nods briefly. "Sorry, I was in the shower. Have you tried to call me?"
Lando, blinking silently at the camera, nods. "Uh, yeah. I wanted to invite you both to a party. After Christmas." He struggles to suppress a smile, and even though the screen is so small, you can see his gaze jump from Charles to you. "My friend Martin is coming here to DJ at a club. If you're up for it, you're both welcome to come."
Charles, who is standing to the side behind you, rests his chin on your shoulder. After this morning, you didn't expect to find Charles back in your personal space so quickly. Whether he realizes you're holding your breath, you don't know. "I don't see what's wrong with that, do you?" The question is directed at you. As you shake your head weakly, your roommate smiles at the camera and puts his hand on your hip. "Then we're definitely in." Suddenly, you feel Charles' lips on your temple as he presses a gentle kiss to your skin. "I'm just going to get ready." With that, he disappears from Lando's sight and, as he enters your bedroom, from yours too.
The way Lando's eyes widen briefly doesn't escape you. "Great. Then I'll put you on the guest list and send you the details." As your gaze shifts from your room back to the Brit, Lando looks back at you with a grin that almost reaches his ears. 
"Lando," you warn him in the same tone Charles just used with Andrea. "Leave it alone."
"I didn't say anything," he defends himself, but the grin doesn't disappear from his face. You'd love to wipe it off his cheek. "So, are you two - ?"
You roll your eyes. "We're friends, Lando. Nothing more, nothing less," you explain to him, but you seem to be falling on deaf ears, because the Brit doesn't seem to believe a word you're saying. 
"Friends with benefits? Or why did Charles just behave like that?"
"What do you mean, like that?" you ask him, tilting your head in confusion. To keep your hands busy, you fill the bowls of fruit with yogurt and add some sweetener before stirring everything. 
"So possessive. So jealous," he explains, as if it's no big deal. Which it certainly wouldn't have been if it hadn't been for this morning's action. 
"You don't know what you're talking about," you retort snappishly, your mouth forming a thin line. "Sorry, that's not what I meant."
"It's all cool. But if you get married, I'll be the guest of honor as matchmaker," he replies, before holding his phone close to his face and grinning broadly at the camera. "And then I'll give a speech about how stupid you both were at the beginning because you didn't want to admit that you were meant to be together."
When you hear Charles' footsteps in the hallway, you quickly reach for your cell phone. "Lando."
"I'm just saying, friends don't look at each other the way you look at him. And that friends don't act as possessive as he does." He raises his free hand, puts his thumb and forefinger together before pulling it over his mouth and pretending to seal his lips with it. "I'm not saying anything more about it."
"Who says no more to what?" Charles asks as he enters the kitchen. 
"Nobody to anything anymore. Bye, Lando," you quickly say goodbye and end the Facetime call, knowing full well that you're sure to get a few more messages from the Brit lovingly mocking you. 
"Oh-kay." Charles sits down opposite you at the kitchen islands and grabs one of the yogurt bowls. You watch him as he shoves spoonful after spoonful into his mouth. "Everything all right?"
"Everything's fine," you reply with a sugary smile and start spooning up your yoghurt too. "I'm just nervous about meeting your mom. I hope she'll like me," you try to change the subject. 
"She definitely will," your flatmate tries to reassure you. "Just be yourself and then she'll love you. And so will my brothers." He reaches across the worktop for your hand and squeezes it twice. "Loving you is easier than you might think."
628 notes · View notes
cafehyunji · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media
Video Phone | Abby Anderson
you sayin that you want me? So press record, I'll let you film me. On your video phone
content : smut, fingering, moaning, minor cussing, modern!abby
I recommend Minors do not interact !!
Knowing Abby, she would take late shifts at the fire department, being in the status of the hard working (and hot) fire fighter, leaving you home alone with your rampant thoughts of her and her “actions”, and today was one of those days. Rather than the usual fingering alone to just the thought of her while laying on her side of the bed you both lay in, listening to a playlist you made for times alone, you take another route. Recording it and sending it to her.
Abby gets a notification as she finishes up the last 30 of her shift, she swipes up pressing the notification with the contact name “Angel 🤍” with an attachment. She’s greeted with the view of you in a pair of lingerie she couldn’t recognize, quickly reaching in her pockets she ruffles around to find her headphones, pulling out the once white case now turned yellow from her hectic days of playing ‘the garden wife” in your backyard on her off days.
Taking out the small pieces inside and placed them in her ear. She looks around a bit not knowing if this could be the regular ask of how your outfit looks or something else, once she feels the coast is clear she starts the video. The phone is set up close enough, giving her a great view of your glistening folds in the dim room, lit by the thin cheap fairy lights you bought on a whim months ago. She cringed seeing them in your hands after telling you they were a fire risk days before they came, but she couldn’t disappoint her beautiful girl… could she?
Soft moans flowed through the small white pieces of plastic, making her feel as if she was in the room sitting and watching as you touched yourself for her. She loved how the dim small warm tinted lights hit your brown slick folds, listening to the sweet gush of her pretty pussy taking in your two digits with ease. From behind the screen, dear lord was she drooling and parched (and nearly having a waterfall between her thighs.) “I wish you were here…” you softly pant, speeding up your thrust. “I don’t feel right without you… but I’m so impatient.. fuck..” You huff, panting and throwing your head back in pleasure.
You softly whine, lifting your head to look at the phone watching yourself as you touch yourself thinking of Abby sitting, and watching at the edge of the bed telling you what to do. A few more pumps of your digits bring you a harsh feeling of relief, causing you to gush all over the newly washed fitted sheets you put on hours ago. you toss your head back onto the pillows, letting the video end on its own before getting up and sending the good parts to Abby.
©cafehyunji 2023
A/n: Long time no see... It's been a long ass time since I've posted something on here that wasn't a repost.. at least Im not treating y'all like my editing account... (I haven't posted there in like 6-7 months.. I'm treating it like the plague..)
204 notes · View notes
judithhhh · 2 days
Note
I was wondering if you could write Jude Bellingham x reader(barca fan)
rivalry (one-shot)
jude x reader
summary : the request!
hala madrid :)
Tumblr media
the excitement you felt for jude after his win against manchester city was slowly fading away as the day of the classico approached. you were always his number one fan, from birmingham to dortmund and now madrid. obviously, as a barcelona fan you were not particularly happy about your boyfriend’s decision to join real madrid but you understood how big of an achievement it was. slowly but surely you found yourself wearing a real madrid jersey way more often that you would have ever thought. the classico was not one of the matches you would go to in the white colors though. even if this decision was not making jude very happy you had still decided to wear a barcelona jersey to the match. it had been an ongoing fight for a week now and even a day before, you found yourself having the same debate with jude just before he left for training.
‘’baby you don't understand, you cannot come to a match wearing a barca jersey when you're dating a madrid player’’
‘’i've been a barcelona fan longer that i've been dating you jude, get over it’’ you said rolling your eyes
‘’well you should have thought about that before dating me’’
‘’i didn't even know you were going to join madrid come on’’ you said a bit louder
‘’we'll talk later, i have to go to training.’’ he responded, too tired to snap back
jude left the house without the usual sweet goodbyes you two shared. you spent the rest of the day mad at him even though a part of you knew he was kind of right. you occupied yourself the best you could all day and left the house just before your boyfriend got back home. you sat in a cafe close to jude’s house and sipped on a teacup until your phone started buzzing.
texts with judee
where are you?
we were supposed to talk when i got back
are u still mad
come back pls love u
you didn't respond but headed back to his house, swallowing back your petty behavior. when you got there, jude was in the shower. you removed your clothes before joining him, making the boy jump at the sudden intrusion. you talked to him normally, like the morning fight had never happened but he just looked at you suspiciously.
‘’you’re not mad anymore?’’
‘’i decided not to, i know barca is going to win no matter what jersey i win’’
the comment made jude chuckle as he tucked you closer to his wet body, his mouth reaching your neck and placing kisses that got lower and lower. when you two were done with your shower and other activities, any bad feelings were entirely gone from your mind.
the next morning, you woke up without jude's presence next to you. looking at your phone, you saw that it was already way past twelve and that the boy had headed out to training some time ago. he hadn't left you any text but when you got up you saw his jersey on the dresser with a note reading "eager to see you wearing that baby, love you xx".
after take a taxi to the stadium, you took a seat in jude's box and hurriedly texted him before he had to come out to train.
texts with judee
good luck today 🥱
btw don't u dare score
ill score and dedicate my celebration to u love
ill rather have you killing me tbh
nvm ill found another girl to do that with
fuck u
love you baby gtg
*you liked the message*
another classico win for madrid and another late winning goal by jude. any other context would have had you screaming and cheering for him but as a barca fan you could just scoff and internally curse your boyfriend for being so good. through the bernabeau’s billboard boards you saw jude’s celebration and didn't miss the smug smile he sent in the direction of the box you were sitting in. you knew you were going to get dragged after today. you hurriedly put on a hoodie, ironically jude’s, on top of the real madrid jersey in hope of at least escaping a bit of jude’s incoming banter.
you waited for him in the hallway next to the locker room not by choice but by obligation, he was still your ride after all. he came out of the room loudly laughing with his teammates before noticing you and murmuring something that made them giggle when they walked past you. jude reached you and pulled you into a hug, which you could not resist returning even though you were mad.
‘’it's such a good day love right?’’ he exclaimed, smiling at you
‘’shut up really’’
‘’aww come on, not gonna congratulate your boyfriend’’ he said clearly restraining himself from laughing in your face
‘’sorry i don't condone cheating’’
‘’nahh don't even start you know that was a fair win’’
you simply rolled your eyes and entered his car, trying to get home even faster. jude didn't say anything else and started driving. halfway through the drive, you realized that he wasn't taking the directions to your flat at all and was actually driving straight to his apartments.
‘’where are you going, you forgot to drop me off?’’ you said
‘’what do you mean, you always stay over after my matches’’ he responded sounding genuinely confused
‘’well, do i look like i wanna stay over today jude’’ you snapped a bit annoyed at his oblivious demeanor
‘’first of all, calm down a bit, yeah. and i understand you're mad about the result but i wanna spend time with my girlfriend so you're coming with me’’
he didn't seem like he was going to take no as an answer and you felt a bit bad for your bitchy attitude so you only turned your head away from him. you heard jude sigh and felt his hand reaching for yours that was resting on your thigh. you allowed him to hold it but didn't make any effort to squeeze it back as you normally would do.
‘’don't even get why you're so mad, baby. you knew barca had no chance of winning this anyways’’
‘’ok this is enough, get me out of this car right now’’ you said giggling, not really taking yourself seriously anymore
jude smiled softly seeing your happy face in the corner of his face. as much as he loved flexing his love for madrid in your face, he still preferred when you were not mad at him. the two of you finished the ride in a mix of stolen kisses at red lights and unserious banter.
212 notes · View notes
legalkimchi · 13 hours
Text
Please learn more than just a Phrase.
I don't expect people to be subject matter experts on issues of global politics.
But false equivalency is rampant in online discourse regarding three major conflicts in the world today. I am using the word conflict in this post, however, when applicable, i will use other words to describe specifics. (Nuance folks... it's a thing)
So i start off with an assumption that most people don't understand the basics of most international events. As an american, i only know some of the stuff that is happening within my own nation. This is not an insult to you, dear reader. Rather, it is a position we all must realize we are in. You do not understand most world issues.
You just don't.
you aren't there. it isn't your life. you don't have the academic background.
I saw a post recently calling for "freedom for Palestine, Sudan, and Congo."
And it bothered me. Not because i am opposed to peace, (how is asking for ceasefire a bad thing?) but rather because i believe simplifying the conflicts with this wording showcases the ignorance of the differences.
Not all conflicts are the same.
In palestine, we have a convoluted mess where two groups claim a territory as home. getting into the in-depth story of this conflict takes time. Foundational elements of it take place thousands of years ago, but the conflict itself is only about 75 years old. So it is a long and short story. Currently, the sovereign state of Israel is engaging in a genocide in Gaza. Asking for freedom for palestinians makes sense. they live in an apartheid state and would like a state of their own. they wish to be free of occupation. you can argue with the details, be pro-israel, or whatever, but that is the basic ask of palestinians. (if you want to get into anti-semetic regional sentiment or the desire of certain groups to eradicate the israeli jewish population or Israel as a nation that's a different topic, not the point of what i'm talking about.)
In the Congo and Sudan, it is a different story.
Let's start with the Congo. First of all, Which Congo?
Let's please understand that there is the Republic of the Congo and the Democratic Republic of the Congo. The Republic of the Congo is a former french colony. Then there is Democratic Republic of the Congo. Some of us might remember this country as Zaire.
the DRC is the congo we are talking about in the news. This was a former belgian colony and the atrocities committed by the belgians there rival any genocide in human history. i've seen estimates between 5 million and 20 million deaths. some estimates state the population of native congolese were cut in HALF. since the turbulent start of the country after their independence in 1960, the country knew relative peace until the 1990s. Then a mixture of a weak central government and the Rwandan Civil war (which had it's own genocide you may have heard about) spilled over into what was then Zaire. Zaire dissolved, and the DRC took it's place, But the wars have been raging off an on since then. earlier this year, more civil war violence erupted AGAIN. This displaced millions, AGAIN. while the DRC is a bit of an autocratic and repressive regime, the rebel groups are groups with ties with the Rwandan government and the other group with ties to Isis. It's awful all the way down.
Sudan has had an ongoing civil war for over 20 years. I remember this because i helped lead some anti-genocide protests regarding Darfur when i was in college 20 years ago. I've been following this conflict for nearly my entire adult life. you may have heard about this with regards to the Save Darfur coalition regarding the genocide in Darfur. Well, that genocide has continued (albeit with less intensity) for 20 years. the civil war lasted until 2021, but restarted in a different form in late 2023. the conflict is now between two different sides of the military government fighting each other.
It is an awful conflict full of awful leaders. Sudan's government suffered a revolution in 2019 from a dictator, only to have that government overthrown in a coup by the current dictator. The Sudanese military is supported by folks like Russia and North Korea. you will see a bunch of communist countries support it, and you might think "hey, maybe al-Burhan is a leftist".
no... no he is not.
He is a military despot. He has no ties to any real ideology. He just runs sudan as a military dictator.
So who is opposing him?
The Rapid Support Forces. and you may be thinking "ok, so they are the good guys? trying to overthrow the dictator?"
No... They are the ones that instigated the Genocide in Darfur.
This is a situation is "no matter who wins, the people of Sudan lose."
So when folks claim these are all the same. Or wonder why folks talk about one and not the other.
there are reasons. These are very different conflicts. Please learn about them. It matters more than spouting some 4 word slogan calling for "freedom."
Find out what the people of these areas actually need. Learn more about what is happening. My description above is incomplete. I may even get some things wrong. I am trying to keep informed, but I am not an expert, nor do i live there. Raise voices from the region and find out if there are ways to help.
120 notes · View notes
icarus-star · 1 day
Note
having sex with Possum in the middle of a forest would fix me. Like him thrusting into you against a tree moaning into your neck and cumming EVERYWHERE. I'm going rabid
ugly boy. | possum 🛸
cw: porn without plot, spit play(?), dry humping, oral (f!receiving), afab!reader (no pronouns used). i'm pretty sure this wasn't a request but ummm it really sparked creativity. >< i hope this doesn't suck, i've been trying to be more descriptive with my writing lately!!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
a low groan erupted from him as you bit down on his neck, giggling to yourself quietly. "ah-hnngh~ pleeaasssee!!" he whined, bark from the tree scratching against his back despite the sweater he wore. the galaxy vest he always would wear was discarded onto the ground minutes earlier.
you and him had been making out for who knows how long in the forest, leaving his 'baby brother' to protect the campsite. possum groaned again, grinding his clothed cock against your knee, he always got desperate so quick when he was high, which was also.. always.
you roll your eyes, quickly going back in for another sloppy kiss. his tongue slid into your mouth as he drooled everywhere, his body practically limp against the tree as your hands held onto him.
as you tongue fucked each other's mouths, he began humping your thigh. the repetitive movement causing him to groan into your mouth. your soft tongue slid against his, feeling the roof of his mouth and his teeth. as you pulled away, he swallowed the mixture of your's and his saliva that had been left in his mouth.
he pawed at your shirt, trying to tear it off of you. but his brain already felt like mush, too stupid and horny to take it off for you. luckily, you did! you pulled your shirt over your head, your bare tits bouncing when they finally were free of the fabric which you had now discarded on the ground with possums vest.
excitedly, he pulled you into another kiss, biting and licking your bottom lip as he did so. possum took ahold of one of your boobs, squeezing and groping you as you shoved your tongue back down his throat, now moaning into his mouth as he pinched your nipples.
your hand slipped into his pants, fondling his balls similarly to how he played with your tits, just with a little less squeezing. drool spilled from both of your mouths as you slid possums pants off to start jerking him off, using his sticky clear precum as lubrication to slide your hand up and down his thick shaft. "nngnh-.. haah~" possum moaned as he leaned his head back, spit dribbling down his chin and the corners of his mouth.
you kiss him again, pulling down your own pants as well. you wasted no time, pushing your underwear to the side and sinking onto possum's cock. you let out a gasp, feeling him fill you up more than anyone could. "it's s'fuckin' big.." you mutter, holding onto his waist.
"yer' so tiiight.. i love it s'much, pleeease fuck me!!" he whined, hips bucking up and shoving his cock all the way into your wet cunt, the tip of his cock giving your cervix a little kiss.
you giggled softly, kissing him on the corner of his mouth as you slowly moved your hips back and forth, cunt sliding up and down his cock. but it wasn't enough for him, he needed to fuck you.
with that, he placed his hands on your hips, switching positions. he had your back against the tree as he began to ram his dick in and out of you. "ah.. ahhnn jus' like that, fuck!" he nearly yelled, he didn't care if someone near by heard him. he needed to let you know you made him feel good, why hide it in fear of getting caught?
every rough thrust of his pulled a little yelp from your throat, obscenities spilling from each of you constantly. "mnnhgn.. i wanna make you cuummmm!" possum whimpered out, spitting in his hand to lubricate your clit, rubbing fast circles as he humped faster into your cunt.
he pulled out, dropping to his knees in front of you. for a moment, you were confused, letting out a little whine at your newfound emptiness. "..wanna taste your pretty pussy pleeaaasee~" he moaned, licking a long strip from your hole to your clit, continuing to lick up and down your clit with a flattened tongue.
he slobbered all over, burying his tongue into your pussy as his nose nudged and nuzzled against your hard, throbbing clit. "y'taste so fuckin' good.." he thought aloud, spitting on your clit and quickly lapping it back up.
you let out a deep groan, your hips bucking forward, shoving your pussy onto his face even more so than it was before. possum wasn't complaining at all, this was like heaven to him. he continued licking you up, even when you buried your hands in his hair, tugging softly everytime he licked at that perfect spot.
as you grinded down on his face, he slowly jerked himself off, lines of thick precum dripping onto the dead leaves on the forest floor. "possum, fuck! m'gonna cum..!" you moan, gripping onto his hair even tighter, tearing a loud groan from him.
"uh huuuhh.." possum hummed, continuing to let you use his face to get off. waves of pleasure crashed throughout your body as you felt yourself cumming, clenching around nothing as you finally got that release. possum quickly licked it all up from your cunt, standing back up and kissing along your jaw.
he placed his hands on your waist, "please lemme fuck you again, i never got to cum. :(" he begged, nuzzling his nose against your neck. once getting a quick 'yes' from you, he lined his cock up with your pussy, filling you up once again.
"mmn, you're so weetttt~" he giggled, looking at you with his big eyes. his face glistening, covered with slick cum and saliva. he started thrusting again, his fat cock felt so sensitive, the feeling of your soaking wet pussy squeezing him was way to much to handle.
possums slippery precum leaked into you, although you couldn't feel it. with every fast thrust possums balls slapped against your ass, every sensation felt like so much more than it really was. it was just too much for him to handle and- "fuuucck!!" he let out a long, loud moan, cumming hard and more than ever.
as he came, he pulled out, jerking off his spasming cock, covering your inner thighs all the way to your belly with the viscous substance. panting, he slumped forward, head resting comfortably between your plush tits.
"possum, how about we head back to the campsite?" "mhmm, baby brothers prolly worried. 😞"
77 notes · View notes
aurorangen · 2 days
Text
OC Deep Dive Questionnaire Tag
Tumblr media
Thank you for tagging me @matchalovertrait @mdshh @duusheen (and anyone else I might have missed, I'm so late to answer!) I'm doing it for Vincent, he's just interesting to talk about! It's a long one:
What uncommon/common fear do they have? Vincent has a fear of crowded places, how people could be watching or spying on him. What do they want? Why are they doing this? Who is behind it? Anyone could be doing it, but he knows it's from his past (unless something new has developed). Remember he has been spied on before, by someone from Strangerville. Now he doesn't know and we don't know if his Dad's disappearance and Strangerville are all linked, but you can probably guess. Also a fear of going into the operating room and surgery.
Do they have any pet peeves? When people are late. He hates it.
What are 3 items you can find in their bedroom? His briefcase, his favourite cologne, iPad
What do they notice first in a person? Facial expressions, eye contact and body language: how they compose themselves.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how high is their pain tolerance? He has high pain tolerance physically/emotionally so 8.
Do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure? In the past, it would be flight. But now that he is older it's always fight. In court, he can be under a lot of pressure, but he is always prepared to fight and win!
Do they come from a big family/are they a family person? From his mum's side, he has a big extended family, from Evergreen Harbour and Henford on Bagley! Growing up he has always wanted siblings. He loves having Isaac as a brother and they spend so much time together now! But his childhood was so lonely at home, while his mum was working and his dad always MIA before his disappearance. Vincent always went over to Billy's house to hang out with Charlie! Billy and Josh have always been his father figures, unlike his own. Now with kids, he'll do the best he can to provide a childhood full of love!
What animal represents them best? Vincent is obviously a lion and Isaac is an eagle. You know in an ecosystem there are food chains where predators catch prey. Well, they are Kingsleys, so they're the top of the "hierarchy". Think of it like they're going into enemy territory (investigating their dad or other cases) and they are bringing them down. But their dad is also a Kingsley...
What is a smell that they dislike? Any sort of science experiment chemical idk...I'm not saying anymore
Have they broken any bones? Nope
How would a stranger likely describe them? Secretive first. But that goes away to easy-going, amicable, reliable
Are they a night owl or a morning bird? Both actually
What is a flavor they hate and a flavor they love? Hmm Vincent is a bit of a foodie and appreciates good food, he likes a lot of stuff really. Something he hates? Mint ice cream lol
Do they have any hobbies? Cooking (I've not explored it though)
Boom, surprise birthday party! How do they react to surprises? He's all good with surprise birthday parties! Vincent would be full of gratitude to the people who took the time and effort to arrange it. He'll make sure everyone enjoys their time and divert himself from being the centre of attention haha
Do they like to wear jewelry? Ooh he likes fancy watches
Do they have neat or messy handwriting? Surprisingly quite messy. He likes typing stuff lmao
What are two emotions they feel the most? Pride, determination
Do they have a favorite fabric? As long as it's comfortable
What kind of accent do they have? British accent duh
49 notes · View notes
astromaxi · 12 hours
Note
Hi!! I saw your post about being open to req's and was wondering if you could do a yandere jjk x reader one!
Snow leopard hybrid gojo would not leave my mind and i've been rotating a scenario in my head about reader smelling a bit too much of other men. But they aren't dating and gojo's is starting to go insane about it and so confronts reader bout it.
i mean you could do it without satoru being a hybrid, i don't really mind. i'm just craving for a yan gojo rn
I AM SO SORRY THIS IS LATE
HOLY SHIT- SCHOOL SUCKS
BUT I'M ALMOST DONE YAY
Warnings: slightly possessive Gojo, crappy writing, maybe full on possessive Gojo, Gojo having a scent kink thing, so mdi (?) 18+ (?), Gojo really loving your smell and but also calling you smelly (I’m scening a slight theme with my writing…)
As always lmk if I miss anything and this isn’t proof read so grammar mistakes 🫶
———-
Fem reader!
‘Jesus Christ I want to quit my job’ was all that was running through my head as I walked up the sets to my home, my feet crying out for relaxation after the horrible treatment of a 9-hour shift. All I want to do right now is to curl up in my bed and cry.
I open my front door, and at the same time, my phone starts to ring off. Huffing I close the door and set down my bag, I awkwardly shuffle through my pockets to see ‘Gojo’ lighting up my screen. An exaggerated sign escapes my lips as I answer the call. “Hello?” My horse voice spoke out, “I’m coming over! I see you off of work” a very happy Gojo responded to me, I looked down at my disgusting work clothes and the overall quality of how I felt, “Gojo- look, I don’t feel like hanging-“ “Great! I’ll be over in 5 minutes.” Was all I heard before the abrupt sound of the call being hanged up. I roughly made my way to my bathroom, if Gojo is coming over might as well look decent.
The thing with Gojo is, that he has been becoming increasingly clingy to me. Especially knowing days when I have work it’s almost as if there’s some sort of thing growing inside himself. I tend to brush him off whenever he buries his head into the crook of my neck, his long lengthy arms curled tightly around my stomach, or when he invites himself to stay the night but insists that I wear his clothes. I brush it off as Gojo being himself as he is usually very overly touching with everyone in his life- but sometimes- sometimes, it feels a little off.
I sighed as I heard my front door opening and closing I wrapped a large towel around my body. I run my fingers through my wet hair as I cringe at it being tangled up. I slip on an old hoodie and a pair of shorts, using the towel to dry my hair I set out of the bathroom and I’m immediately pushed against the wall nearby. My vision gets clouded by a mop of white hair and twitching light grey ears, as Gojo buries his head into the crook of my neck.
“Mm-Gojo!” I yelp in surprise as I place my hands on his solid chest trying to move him off of me
Keyword: trying
Gojo slips his hands down my arms, creating goosebumps in his wake as he grabs my hands with his own and places them around his midsection. His own hands find home on my hips as I feel an aggressive sign flow out of him. “M’ not Gojo, it’s ’Toru to you” his voice is horsed, and Gojo buries his head more into my neck- if that’s even physically possible. “You smell like other guys.” Gojo bluntly says,
I raise my eyebrows at him, my hands are mindlessly playing with his Snow White hair. “What do you mean ‘Toru?” I ask, the man-child before me lets out a groan. He raises his head from my neck and stares at me with his ocean-blue eyes. My heartbeat picks up as I feel my face heat up. Wordless Gojo tilts his head to the side, his eyes turn to something more obsessive. His pale hands travel up my body to cup my face, the air in my lungs gets stuck in there.
“You smell. Every day, every single day you always smell and it’s driving me insane.” He leans into me, our lips inches apart as his eyes dart down to my lips. “You should only smell like me, only be with me. I can give you so much baby.” His right-hand caresses the side of my face. I shake my head
“ ‘Toru you..” I let out a shaky sigh “You don’t want-“ “I know exactly what I want baby.” Gojo cuts me off, his breath growing more aggressive.
His lips move to the shell of my ear. “I want, no- need you baby. I need it so badly you don’t even know the depth of it” he whispers in my ear as he goes back to face me. “You need me to, I’ll prove it to you.” I nodded my head, allured to the words Gojo was feeding me, our lips connected as he immediately pressed the kiss. His arms cage me against this wall. My knees feel like they are going to give out.
“I’m going to show you just how much I need you baby.”
—————
A/n: this isn’t really that yandere, kinda forgot about that while writing this LMAO
47 notes · View notes
vourequat · 6 hours
Text
愛しています、ミスター・ジャパン!
Tumblr media
WARNING: Nothing really, just some fluff, not proof read as much, horrible English, fem!reader.
This is the very first fanfic I'm writing for my birthday special, basically I'll be posting short or long fanfics along the days leading up to my birthday (I surely didn't forget that my birthday month is tomorrow). So be thankful that I'm spoiling you all instead of myself (⁠ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ⁠)⁠━⁠☆゚⁠.⁠*⁠・⁠。゚
Tumblr media
The constant sweat leaving your body to cool off your body was a huge sign that it was indeed the summer season, when he saw you all fatigued after coming home late after a mission due to the heat and the exhaustion of your already tiring work he immediately thought of one thing and one thing only— the thing you two had always dreamed about.
"Hon, morning...." He smiled as he flipped the last pancake he'll be making this morning, he turned around to greet you in an embrace and a quick kiss to your head.
You only hummed, still half asleep.
As you were sitting down and sipping on the coffee that he had served you he decided to sit down before decorating the pancakes, it was quite unusual really, Kento wasn't exactly the type to sit down or lay down without finishing something first so you immediately knew that something was up.
Kento took a deep breath, "So... I've been thinking" he began.
You lifted your head up from your coffee to meet his hazel eyes that brightened the moment you made eye contact, it was as if his pupils formed a heart the longer he looked at you.
"Yes...?"
"Why don't we spend the summer in Kuantan like we always talked about?" He continued as he slid two airplane tickets to Malaysia over to you.
It took you a bit to get it but once you did, you stood up in joy and attacked him with a big hug and wet kisses all around his face.
"Well, someone's obsessed with me...!" Kento laughed as he pulled you onto his lap and looked deeply into your eyes, "You'll be the death of me... a death that I'll accept with open arms."
Once you feel the sand on your toes, you feel like you were in a dream.
You couldn't believe you and your long time boyfriend had finally set foot in your dream escape place, the place where you two had dreamt of retiring to after you leave the sorcery life behind and just live normally.
Behind you, you heard a sigh and a grunt.
You turned around and immediately gasped— The Kento Nanami was on one his knee in front of you!
"Hey..." You were already on the verge of tears as the people around you gasped and cooed at the sight that they were witnessing first hand.
"God this is embarrassing but..." Kento sighed and mustered up the courage from his entire soul and took out a small velvety box from his pocket.
"Honey... I... we've been together for a good eleven years now and I've wanted nothing but to continue to wake up every morning and go to sleep every night seeing you beside me."
He began to grow more flustered with the amount of people now looking at them, he bickered himself from picking this over a private setting but he was just panicking the entire airplane ride on how to execute his proposal, normally he'd go by every proposal with flying colours but this was different— he was offering you to be his wife, to be the mother of his children, to be the person he'll love until he can't remember anything else anymore as you two grow old.
"I wish for the heavens above to hear my wishes... my wish that I can be your husband, your partner, your boyfriend, and your everything for my entire life time..."
"Will you marry me—"
"Yes! Oh my gosh, yes!" You squealed as you pulled him up into a hug, every single person who watched all clapping and cheering for the two of you.
Kento couldn't believe it anymore; first, you two finally fulfilled your dreams to go to Malaysia and now you two will soon be wedded.
"I can't wait to finally see you crying as I walk down the aisle..." You both chuckled at your joke as he finally sealed the deal and slid the ring into your ring finger before giving you a quick kiss.
"Mrs. Nanami does sound nice..."
Tumblr media
A/N: I forgot that my birthday is near but that's okay at least I didn't forget on the literal day of my birthday like last year and wondered why was everyone cooking and why were there so many people, but anyways, yeah, I'll be posting tomfoolery for a few days until my birthday (I won't say when, baka manghingi ka pa lumpia)
Tumblr media
I want a Jollibee themed birthday (I'm literally a grown woman)
24 notes · View notes
greywoe · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
"The she-wolf laid into the squires with a tourney sword, scattering them all. The crannogman was bruised and bloodied, so she took him back to her lair to clean his cuts and bind them up with linen."
466 notes · View notes
j-ellyfish · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
He's so pretty in this pic, I love the expression - or lack thereof. Like, his expression is almost neutral, but then he also got the slight frown in his eyebrows, the very subtle pout and he's breaking eye contact so it's like he's lightly bothered by the situation but you can't tell in which way, if he's actually hiding annoyance, embarrassment or what else. Or if there's just something on his mind he's trying to ignore but cannot. I love these kinds of expressions so much.
24 notes · View notes
sabraeal · 4 months
Text
1000 Followers Update!
Due to some super fun chronic health shenanigans, the posting for the 1000 Followers Celebration is being postponed a month! Posting will start on 2/2 with to all the ghost still standing in this room, and continue as previously planned from there. Thank you guys for bearing with me-- I struggled with the idea of even postponing for a week, but it became very clear on Monday that I would not be able to catch up with the schedule unless I took an extended break to recover. Can't wait to show you guys what I've got up my sleeve!
#1000 followers#i don't talk much about my illness struggles on here because without a word count limit#i would absolutely write myself into a terrible spiral talking about some of the very recent setbacks#but I do weekly goals up on twitter and I often talk about what's going on there#so it's only fair that i explain a bit in some tag chatter where i have to stay on task#to start: i'm fine and I'm going to be quick to recover now that i've gotten my meds#but due to all sorts of insurance bullshittery that has occurred since september/october#my last three infusions have been over a week late. two of them have been nearly two weeks or over#and coupled with a particularly nasty stomach bug + christmas stress#i ended up with extremely bad exhaustion and brain fog#and on monday finally flared#thankfully i was able to move my infusion up a day so I only had to wait until wednesday#and me and my husband had planned that I would be out of commission for the 10 days my meds were overdue#so I just had to triage my commitments and lay low until they could get me what i needed#it's been two days and i'm doing much much better. back to a place where I can actually write#probably at a better place than i have been since the beginning of December since today I nearly blew through 1K without even trying#but it's been 2-3 weeks of barely being able to scratch out what i consider my minimum#and then a week and change of not being able to even READ without it overwhelming me#so i finally had to face the music of: not only can I NOT do this on time but I need fully shift it#so that I can work without stressing myself or my limits#i am a rat gnawing at the bars of my little rat cage over it but it is what it is#tldr; i'm here i'm fine i just have to accept my human limitations and i don't like it
12 notes · View notes
lunaetis · 6 months
Text
[ sorry about lack of activity / ic content as of late. i've been battling a writer's block that is creeping in from my work stress. my health hasn't been the best either due to stress and lack of sleep as well so writing & wording had been difficult for me. i've been catching up on g.enshin & h.sr quests during the weekend, but i'm going to try to attempt some drafts / writing this week. ( hopefully i'm not jinxing myself with that ! ) thank you everyone for being so patient & understanding with me ! ]
11 notes · View notes
01tsubomi · 10 months
Text
i'm taking the jlpt this sunday and had a stress dream last night abt it bc it sort of snuck up on me and now it's kind of a question of how much my actual japanese abilities will carry me (versus if i should've been cramming on flashcards this past month) but the listening portion is far simpler conversation than my coworkers and i have so. i think that maybe instead of "damn i should've been studying japanese" my perspective should just be "i speak japanese"
#a key part of the dream though was that i failed because i went on a motorcycle joyride during the 40 minute break and didn't make it back#in time for the listening section. the prompt for the listening section btw was to write an essay in english about kirishima eijirou#so i was like damn i would've totally passed#anyway hashtag classic maya but idk#i think i have a bit of a complex abt it bc i was studying for n1 (highest level) in college#but w the switch to online learning we stopped studying the stuff i really needed to work on (vocab and kanji)#and whatever kanji i knew how to write went out the window bc i never had to turn in written homework again#so i really let myself go there for a good two years but since moving last summer i've not only been having japanese conversations every da#i've also actually been studying kanji in my downtime at work#so i have picked up most of the study guide-type information just really slowly over time#i read a ton of manga in japanese lately and most shows on netflix here don't have eng subtitles but i'm fine without them 95% of the time#with the genre of shows i watch at least#so i've been thinking a lot lately abt what my end goal is w japanese studies because 'be able to consume all the art i want' feels like#a good place to be#i do think in the end the only thing between me and n1 is a lot of genuine hard work studying vocab and kanji and reading serious articles#so i feel like all 'sekkaku da shi' i've made it this far why would i just stop working at this point#those are just my thoughts though aaaa i know reading/vocab/grammar section is way more hit or miss#personal
12 notes · View notes
solvicrafts · 10 months
Text
One of these days when I'm in the right mental space for it I really, really want to post about how incredibly isolating it feels to be neuro-divergent in the pagan community and, at the same time, more or less following a near-reconstructionist path despite how extraordinarily difficult it is because my brain just wired differently so I basically have to fight own instincts and inherent nature in order to practice my religion but at the same time I fight entirely of my own accord because it falls in line with my personal principles and--
#solvi's personal ramblings#it's late for me so today probably will not be that day#but I've been wanting to write a series of posts on this topic and others#because there's an immense feeling of isolation that I deal with in the pagan community that I don't talk about#and weirdly enough I feel like my non-pagan followers on here would understand it a lot more than the broader pagan community likely would#especially my abbilen in the Legend of Drizzt community#but like to put it simply for now I genuinely feel like Kimmuriel and maybe a bit like Drizzt sometimes#especially in my offline social circles#because certain people in my personal life who have grown progressively anti-theist over the years#will actively shit on anyone who believes in or worship anything because in their mind it's all Christianity#and all of Christianity is the Westboro Baptist Church#and on those rare occasions where I do manage to slightly challenge them they give me the Drizzt treatment#'man drow suck they're awful they're just the worst I can't wait to kill them... oh well except you 'cause you're OK I guess'#like because my brain just doesn't work the way other peoples' brains do there are aspects of religion and spirituality I struggle with#so I don't really fit in with the crystal woo crowd but I also don't fit in with most other recon-leaning polytheists#and then I get really actively shat on by anti-theists I know because they can't separate modern ex-Christian baggage#from literally everything else#like it does not compute in their mind that extreme American Christian beliefs =/= ALL RELIGION or ALL CHRISTIANS#and nothing seems to get it through to them and they take everything in bad faith#so I feel very isolated at times because I don't seem to really have a place really anywhere#because my interpretation of religion and spirituality and my ability to practice it will always be different due to my inherent nature#so I'll basically never 'belong' anywhere#I'm gonna join Kimmuriel in the 'I shoulda been born an illithid' thing except I don't know what I should've been born as#I just know that the person I was born as just doesn't seem to fit in anywhere or have a place in the world
7 notes · View notes
mustangs-flames · 3 months
Note
Do you think you will have time to fix the masterpost links after you're done with the new chapter later this week?
I aim to do that sometime this week - I've just been very busy working on a game with a company so that's taken up a lot of my time the past few days. The links should be fixed (and some of them updated) by this weekend at the latest
5 notes · View notes
spacefoxy-irl · 10 months
Text
Thank you everyone for being so lovely towards me. I have not ignored everyone's messages, I just had to take a little distance for a while. We good now, I think. 🧡
7 notes · View notes