#//also had super really bad internet recently but that's ok. i guess i'll just go insane to the same 5 songs i have downloaded‚ it's ok :)

[keeps-ache]

at some point i'll start recording while i draw. mostly cuz i want to see what i did to get to this point but it'd be neat... if i did it hvhsd

#just me hi #i would like to be able to post that stuff too #it'd be neat :> if i- #but unfortunately i have what is called Bad Memory and zero knowledge of how to build a habit so i guess one day loll #like -I- would like to see what it looks like when i draw 5 hands in 30 minutes and nothing else. it'd be fun !! #sigh. but alas. past me does not think that far into the future #the furthest we think is 'hee hee scribble :3' and then black out for a thousand years #but that's ok‚ we have hands now :) (drawn hands) #//and i've been having trouble picking something to work on again lollll #you'd think that making refsheets for the Ch0ir would mean 'oh! there's a decent amount of interest in that to do something else with it!' #nO!! lol!! won't can't didn't lolll #wanted to work on my current favorite writing-project‚ nahp!! nothing there‚ don't even Touch the save file or kaPOOT #wanted to do Something‚ Anything with p1nk space and That didn't even leave my brain. Zero Action Involved 💯 #//also had super really bad internet recently but that's ok. i guess i'll just go insane to the same 5 songs i have downloaded‚ it's ok :) #[<- lying so hard we are losing my mIND somebody send helP i'm blinking twice auhguhgruog] #and i also misplaced my sketchbook so i've spent some time just staring out windows and at my siblings to slightly offput them. very #therapeutic i highly recommend 👍 #//idk why i keep adding a second C to recommend. when did that start happening #every time without fail! reccommend is recomends sibling‚ and they're both recommends cousins #and don't even Mention reccomend! pah‚ that guy's insufferable #/see why can i spell congratulations beautiful insufferable ingenuity and poltergeist right on the first try but i can't (ex.) SPEEL. #these rules are dumb. from now on watever happesn hapens #see cuz i can get eh t letters but the odered is all wrong. and sometimes it's just staightr up the wrong word #like why did i just spell 'of course' ?? i meant 'backwards' ._. #and it's not even slepped right!! like hwat is goin on over there waith 'ovfc ousres'. they good orrr ?? #likek whtatch me i can't get so many words wrong is none sentence s who even NEEDS aoutcorrect ouhfuohosug #meant 'can' but who cares fvfvbshfj #how does one hit an apostrophe by accident. tha ansswer is Magic obvisouly #liek i know i mispell kinda often but i reall y go through these things so often cuz i just have wonlyky fingers! they do they're own thisg #they like to dance!! and condgind is n't always coordinated

[gilmesc1]

Ok, ok, hi, here's part one of the questions, I'll put 10-15 on each one. thank you for doing thiss. 1) how do you feel about being in a system, 2) favorite thing about being in a system? 3) what do you think of the fanbase, 4) do you interact with the fanbase often? 5) what do you think of kinning? 6) any thoughts on the kind that c*t O*f a f****r? 7) ru still super lucky/unlucky? 8) have you ever met any other yous? 9) r u involved on that rp blog? 10) what's your reasoning for the hope thing

Ok, I’m really not sure how I should open this post. Well here goes nothing. Hello! Yes I’m a fictive of Nagito Komaeda, and I still go by that name, wow this is going absolutely no where, sorry, this is going to be a huge disappointment anon XD

Ok, and questions. Part one??? I mean it’ll probably take me a while to get any of these done but I’ll try.

1. Well honestly it’s one of the best things to happen to me. It’s practically impossible for me to be alone now, there’s always someone to talk to. I don’t suppose anyone particularly likes me, but that’s to be expected, I’m pretty annoying XD. Anyways, I’m lucky to be in this situation. I can think of much worse.

2. Like I said, I almost can’t find a way to be alone. Even if I don’t exactly have any friends, at least there are people.

3. Um, well...it’s nice. Yeah. I can’t lie. I don’t know how to feel about it really. I don’t really understand what I have to do with a skeleton but I guess it’s kind of funny. I’m sure that there are lots of wonderful people, and naturally some scum bags like in any community. Honestly I’m overwhelmed though. I’m still coming to terms with the fact that I’m a fictive and seeing the adoration for my character...yeah it’s overwhelming. I don’t understand. I’m nothing compared to others. It’s nice, but I think anyone who praises me that much needs to get their head checked. No offense to them, they just shouldn’t waste their time on someone like me XD

4. This would be the first thing I’ve done in a while. I recently came out of a 2-3 year long dormant period and since we were in a bad place the last time I was around I didn’t really have time or the want to do much. Again, it’s a little overwhelming, and it makes me feel, well not really sick, more like I’m having a really weird dream, and I know I’m dreaming but I can’t wake up? Sorry, I do this a lot too. I still can’t ever say things like I want to even in a new body XD

5. I had to google that. And um, I’m not completely sure still? Again it’s overwhelming that there are people who identify with me. Especially since I’m really not a person who’s a good choice to like. I don’t think I have the right to judge though. I’m no more the real Komaeda than they are. Again it’s just a weird thing to see. The more I look at it, the weirder I feel, to the point where I started laughing a few times. I wouldn’t say that it was genuine laughter, I just felt so weird, and fuzzy. Guess it was too hard to contain whatever I was feeling XD

6. This took me fifteen minutes to figure out what it said. At first I thought you said cut off a fucker, and I don’t really know what that means. Did they cut them off financially? Cut them out of their life? Kill them? So vague. And then I googled it again and well. Again someone like me has no place telling anyone what to do but, um, let’s not cut off body parts?? Especially not for me?? Can we agree that I’m not exactly the most stable and that therefore people shouldn’t do that?? Reading that was one of the most surreal things. Dammit now I’m laughing again. I swear I’m not insane, maybe I’m allergic to the fanbase and it makes me break out in laughter??

7. Well, hard to say. The first time I ate after coming out of dormancy we got food poisoning. I was sitting on a chair last night and I heard a weird clink, and when I looked down I saw a screw on the ground, and thought huh, wonder what that’s for. I shifted my weight and that’s when the chair collapsed. The screw was from the chair if you couldn’t tell XD

A waitress also dumped hot coffee on me this morning. That reeeeally hurt but I got free food, so I think it was lucky.

8. No. Wow, just thinking about that makes my head hurt XD I don’t know if I want to. One of me is disappointing enough. Imagine if two of me were together.

9. No. I am a fan of it though, which is weird. Whoever writes for me does it creepily well. Anyways I do like it. It seems so hopeful, and it brings hope and gives me hope so yes it’s a very good thing. I don’t know what I’d do though. I mean, I think the mod is better at being me than I am XD Plus idk how i’d even approach these people. There is a discord that our host is in, but all I’ve done is sit there silently reading convos. The blog name is dangan-happy, which is super cute. It’s just a cute concept.

Which isn’t creepy at all, I know XD

10. What’s confusing? It seems pretty straightforward to me. Have you ever heard the saying the shortest distance is a straight line? It’s like that. The shortest distance to good things is bad things. If the bad has already happened then the good remains. If I cause the bad that means that I can control what happens to a degree. Hope, despair, luck,..whatever the opposite of luck is. Unluck? It’s all like that. You just have to cut the straight line.

Ok, I guess there will be a part two? I mean. This is pretty disappointing so I get it if I should burn this post in internet hell or something.

But thank you for the asks though. It did feel nice to talk about some things.

#did #dissociative identity disorder #didosdd #actuallytraumagenic #actuallydid #actuallymultiple #fictive #alters #fictional introject #nagito komaeda #oh wow I'm a tag #unexpected XD