#& ive been thru this sort of situation where bad shit is happening to u and u dont know its bad because you have zero frame of reference

[lesbianutena]

seeing people go on about how naive and foolish and blind and stupid utena is and i’m just sitting here like. she’s 14! i disagree strongly with the idea that utena is willfully or maliciously ignorant. like yes, while i think she does often fail to fully comprehend whats happening (especially in the last arc) she’s also finding herself in increasingly horrifying and new situations with no point of reference for how abnormal it all is?? she is doing her very best to make sense of things as a 14 year old child who has no parental figures or guardians, no friends who aren’t also somehow in on the manipulation happening to her, nowhere to go outside of ohtori. and that is on top of trying to navigate her experiences and identity as a queer and gnc person!!!! i feel like folks are wildly overestimating the comprehension the average closeted teenage lesbian has of systematic heteropatriarchiarcal cycles of abuse! she’s literally 14!!! save the scorn for the willfully ignorant for akio

#idk. ig it feels a little victim blamey to me? #not saying it Is that just that it Feels that way #i think the self-blame she experiences for failing to realize sooner is at least IMO internalized victim blaming #anthy and utena both blame themselves for shit that is fundamentally Not Their Faults #theyre each like wow im a horrible person for getting caught up in this cycle of violence and dragging this person i care for down with me #when like #idk yall i think the problem deserving of scorn is the teenager fight club run by a serial r*pist 💀 #THIS IS just my opinion i would love to know other ppls perspectives #this isnt vagueing anyone i just see that sorta take a lot and im like #idk! its not a Wrong interpretation or anything but it just rubs me the wrong way #idk maybe i just see a Lot of my younger self in utena akhejshsjs #& ive been thru this sort of situation where bad shit is happening to u and u dont know its bad because you have zero frame of reference #utena tenjou #rgu meta #rgu spoilers #rgu #revolutionary girl utena

[thezeekrecord]

hi im waiting for pain meds to kick in before i continue sleeping so im gonna sit here and talk about the intents behind character arcs in good afternoon good evening and goodnight ok i try not to talk about it like this Too much but hey it's fanfiction why not

so like. essentially the big overarching theme was obv supposed to be the subjectivity of reality and what it meant for themselves and their relationships

for gordon especially the game meant a lot about who he is/who he gets to be or wants to be, the idea of being a player character and second guessing your own intent was something i was excited to write as i was first starting to plan this fic out. i wanted him to struggle a Lot retroactively with reality when it felt like everyone else had long since accepted it had been a game, and ultimately that was supposed to play into his relationship with benry a lot. also obviously a huge thing for him was Trauma, we all love a good gordon freeman trauma hurt/comfort moment right? i wanted to write sort of a backwards progression for him when they were in hl2, like i tried to reverse the script a little between gordon and benry where he just. he was doing his best contrary to what happened with benry and was Worried because that's very gordon, but him just laughing thru a lot of shit and not taking it entirely seriously like he should, not even paying attention to how bad he needed a break because Well It’s Not Real Right? meanwhile benry.....well i gotta back up for him for a bit

benry i feel like i struggled a bit with, i wish id written him Slightly different in the beginning at least but ehh. idk there's a lot of content out there for benry that i feel like skips over the idea that he hurt everyone (im Not getting into disc horse over this even though i have a lot of thoughts about it) but it was important to me to write an arc of him really trying to reach out? i think ppl fall into the trap of putting "gordon has to understand benry" before "benry has to make an effort to be understood". i think it's easier to project and say you want the others to put in that effort on his behalf, but the truth is i think that effort has to be very mutual! i liked writing an arc for him where he doesn't even understand himself very well and had to give his relationships time. i wish id had more time for it, but trying to juggle so many character arcs was Really tough lol. but regarding my choice w/the hl2 part, i do wish id had the opportunity to have him there More, i entertained the idea of him being powerless but with gordon the whole time or smth, but plotwise it just wasn't working out And it felt relevant for him to have that whole experience with the nihilanth. i wanted him to have the reverse experience to gordon was having, suddenly realizing there were actual consequences and he could die, essentially living out what gordon felt was his experience in hl1 fighting benry even if ultimately things would have been ok, bc he didn’t Know or register that at the time?

Whoa 2 Paragraphs For Benry anyway after that, even tho i took his powers away temporarily for adding context to the others' perceived experience and fpr worldbuilding/adding stakes to the situation, i don't really like story arcs for redeeming characters where their arc is represented by having powers taken away Permanently. like "its ok guys i just literally can't do it anymore so i won't" u know?? it doesn't feel like Enough. i wanted to show something where he took back his powers and what made him who he was and used it for Good. i think that rounds things out a little better? it was important that everyone, especially gordon, got to see him taking back the powers he used to attack them in the game and using them to protect them instead. it was a part of his identity, being like Not Human, and played v importantly into his relationship with tommy

with tommy i feel like. ok with everyone in gagegn i feel like i was deliberately mischaracterizing a bit for the sake of the story because My City Now, but i think tommy got hit pretty hard ajchdjshg i just wanted a very particular arc from him....so he was Very serious and i wish id worked in more moments where he got to be like, comedically just super wrong about something or just generally silly but Oh Well. anyway tommy's experience with knowing it's not real was very much implied to be a lifelong struggle and i was Heavily projecting, like, i love the unreality elements in hlvrai because [dissociates and gets delusions about nothing being real] and i just wanted to leave it implied he's always had a hard time with feeling like he Knows it's not real, and still just. Keeps Chugging Along bc what else can u do? also this is a very particular thing but i feel like with psychotic characters in media there's always a question of "but what if....the whole thing isn't real....." but i wanted to write an arc for a character where delusions Prepared them for something in a sense? i could go on for a whole other post about the dsm and psychosis representation etc etc but he was just. Prepared for knowing it wasn't real. my experience i projected heavily onto the story was acceptance of such a weird, abstract concept, and just trying to have a fulfilling life/relationships anyway because what would trying to unravel it all just for the sake of it do?

and that plays into how i wrote gman as essentially a foil to tommy, but im almost done with a ""post-canon"" fic about him so i won't say much on that (i think the fic caters to only me specifically maybe but i'll still post it ajfjsfh) but regarding tommy's whole thing with g-man, it was Very intentional for things to feel sort of unresolved and for him to still second guess himself. it was important to me that way idk, i feel like that's more true to life?

i WISH i had more time and ideas for darnold though.... he's another case of my projecting definitely, and i actually almost had Him go into nova prospekt with alyx instead of gordon and reappear at exactly the right moment for dramatic effect, but i wanted an arc for him where he discovered he wanted more than anything else to be with the science team and to have him disappear kinda contradicted that :/

im running out of steam to keep typing this. well with dr coomer i feel like that was another wild thing that was me projecting again ajdjajfjd i just love a good fantasy DID/OSDD situation (NEVER SEES THIS FOR REAL) and i wanted a little extra flavor with the clones to sort of mirror bubby's struggles

and with bubby. like ok with the prototypes and vortigaunt friend, i had the idea maybe a prototype survived the resonance cascade and had been hiding that whole time and bubby actually finds and rescues him? but that felt too weird and complicated for everything else going on so i threw in a vortigaunt as an emotional standin for him. the reason i wrote bubby resentful to his prototypes at first is one of those things i only introduced to represent part of his story arc and not necessarily a headcanon, i love the idea he considers them family and likes them for the most part! it was just something to slowly represent him growing past black mesa without just Saying it

it's like 5am. lastly.....the player......just like gman was to tommy, i did my best to write the player as almost an opposite to gordon even if i tried to make them as similar as possible. something i rarely see is exploring how complicated i feel like it would Actually make things to have a player, outside your game, trying to be your friend? i understand why ppl don't go this route and i didn't go too hard on it, but i mean, he's this guy who has control over your world and is living outside of it, and views all your life hardships as trivial in comparison to his own? i wanted to represent this in only small ways, because i thought it made sense to show him genuinely making an effort, but in moments like when he was talking to benry and when he talked to gordon, i wanted to show him just. Trying but still not taking it as seriously as he should, he gets Mad but he's treating it like a video game still! it's a power imbalance, and if nobody else was going to explore that then i would afhjchkg

my choice getting back to tommy and benry at the end.... maybe i wrote it a little angstier than i should have but that's something I'm glad i ran with, i was nervous ppl wouldn't like it but. having that flash forward was important for tommy especially after he fought with gman about like, the significance of short lives. he still had benry who i think i could have tried to show being a lot happier to be there to drive the point home, he's just kinda deadpan and maintained him that way but genuinely i wanted him to be happy to explore space with tommy! they had a weird beginning to their friendship, and solidarity of being partly aliens in their own regards, and they were out there finally exploring those aspects of themselves, PLUS

they were very literally just. freely exploring their reality. they got to do Anything without it having to be established by the player! that was supposed to be something Good, they were happy to have that freedom and liked seeing new things with each other that even the player probably never dreamed of. it's Their World, they can do and see anything, even their goal of finding an equivalent of where gman could have come from was kinda just something to slowly work towards to keep them going in some vague direction. the primary goal was to just have a good time

anyway this story was the longest thing ive ever written in my life idk what came over me lol

#zeek speaks

[pepprs]

[DONT RB] ok so there’s no way for me to talk abt this that isn’t gonna make me look like an absolute dumbass but im in the middle of a creative existential crisis and i rly need help figuring it out :•( this is gonna get SUPER LONG so im putting it under a readmore. thank u to anyone who reads this!!! and double thank u to anyone who can give some input / advice, i rly rly appreciate it. im sorry abt the length!

aight so for some background.... ive been drawing n writing poetry for abt 5 yrs now and both of those things r rly important to me. in school im an english major w a creative writing minor (for the poetry) and i work as a graphic designer (for the art) so ive been growing a lot as an artist and writer esp in the past 2 yrs and im kinda workin towards one or the other (or ideally both somehow!) as a career. one of the biggest dreams ive had since i started seriously pursuing both of these hobbies 5 yrs ago is to publish a book of poetry that i design / illustrate myself, and also to have a portfolio online where ppl can read all of my poetry and see all of my artwork (both professional / work stuff but also archives of all of my sketchbooks since those r rly important to me!!!) and maybe even make some sort of online shop where ppl can buy my art (stickers, keychains, etc!) and my poetry books!

that sounds pretty simple right? WRONG!!!!!! why? bc im a fucking idiot! and there are several dumb things i do that make this dream completely impossible for me to achieve! love that for me!

so for starters... ive been posting (almost) all of my art and ALL of my poetry online for all 5 yrs ive been creating it. that’s bad because:

ive hardly ever used my real name (which i would want to use for the book / shop / portfolio), it’s been under my usernames / aliases that go along w them (p*pe, pep, pea, etc and related usernames that shall not be mentioned) and i started going by my real first name only abt a yr ago, but still maintain those usernames for the most part in conjunction w my real name

my work has been primarily been posted to d*viantart and tumblr which aren’t exactly the most uh... professional places to do that. not that there rly are many i guess lmao but still

my online persona on these platforms is rly like. lax and loose which is Cool And Quirky when brought into a professional setting if it’s done right i guess.... but im just immature and unprofessional. i swear all the time, i shitpost constantly, im incessantly tmi? and that’s not even it like it’s just a whole mess!

SO there’s that whole set of problems and like im just concerned because... i stopped posting art online last yr for the most part and a lot of the old stuff that’s on dA (since that was rly where i did it most) is bad and not worth sharing like that anyways, so im not as worried abt that. but my poetry.... i still actively post that online in all my messiness and candidness here and like. it’s rly not that hard to find me? like if u copy a poem of mine and put it in google it’ll pull up my dA right away! and that’s like.... GOD i just am embarrassed for anyone irl to see that or for that to be connected with my irl / professional self in the future, but i don’t want to stop posting my work there (or here!!!!!) bc the community is so supportive and ive made some rly good connections / built a lot of traction over the 5 yrs ive been doing it. (PLUS for the online portfolio i wanna do specifically... i kinda want to post all of my art and poetry there, like everything ive ever done (specifically poetry, ive written almost 500 poems over the 5 yrs ive been doing it!), but i feel like that’s not rly the most professional thing to do and idk how to even gauge whether it is or not :-/)

but that’s not all!!!! because there’s another part to this and that is: the very nature of the content i produce is Not Good! for my art it’s not as much of a problem bc since I work as an artist rn a lot of what i make is professional, but for my personal art... a lot of that is either self portraits or my characters and a lot of my characters are like. animals. like specifically pepe (who is basically Me As A Cat).... i draw her constantly and so much of my best work is of her but it’s just like? embarrassing i guess for my ocs to take up so much of my portfolio and sketchbooks and stuff and share that. like i know everyone has characters and it’s not bad to do that and share that but i feel like ppl will judge me :-( so it’s made me rly hesitant to post stuff to my art ig for example bc i just don’t fucking know how to act, like it’s bad enough that i can’t type the way i want to and i have to type in proper caps n whatever instead bc irls i don’t know / trust as well follow me (including some ppl from work? Yikes?)....... but i feel like i can’t share my sketchbook stuff for example bc it’s all cats and my characters and visual shitposts and im uncomfy to share that bc like... im almost 20 and i don’t want ppl to think im immature or whatever? i kno i should feel like it’s my account and i can post wot i want but like. i fucking can’t bro i just can’t!!

and THEN.... my poetry. that’s the biggie bc like for my art? even tho im uncomfortable i don’t mind sharing that w ppl i know irl but for my POETRY.... it’s very easy to find like where i share that i guess? (the google thing i mentioned earlier but also its linked to my art on here and dA too... f) but i literally never actively share my writing w irl ppl unless im performing @ an open mic or workshopping in class bc im fucking terrified of the possibility of irl ppl finding my poetry. it’s almost ironic how public ive been w it online but how private i am abt it irl... it’s like im living a double life and it’s fucking terrible but it’s the only way i feel safe. bc like art is what i do for other ppl and also to destress and vent when i need a quick fix on my own time. but poetry.... that’s personal, it’s where i feel most like myself, it’s how i talk abt my life and ppl in it and make meaning of things and talk abt things authentically and Get Deep. and my literal worst nightmare is for ppl (who have the explicit ability to by virtue of Knowing Me) to read into it and Understand what im talking abt and have that power over me and see me differently for feeling the way i do or doing what i do. ive actually already been burned by this before after my mom read some work of mine that had been published irl (i don’t want to get too into it but basically i retroactively outed myself thru her reading that poem for what it was and it was Very Very Bad) and as paranoid abt it as i was before, it’s even worse now that it’s actually happened to me and could happen again at any time, esp if i decide to take my work further.

that manifests in a few ways too, like my writing is so cryptic and vague and very heavy on metaphors / symbolism and shit partially out of that deep fear and need to shield myself and my work. sometimes in spaces where i do feel comfy sharing, ppl have a hard time understanding my poetry unless i give context. online and on stage and in workshop ppl don’t rly know me outside of a context where the only thing we have in common is self expression thru poetry, so i don’t rly mind sharing more when it’s appropriate. but if i were to share my work as a book or w/e, ppl im close to (who maybe don’t always think like a poet / artist does bc they aren’t that) would want to buy it and read it and might ask abt what it means and i don’t even know what i would do in that situation. and if ppl were to read my work and see themselves / others in it, whether it is abt them or not, im scared it could genuinely damage relationships like it did with my mom.

SO UH.... idk where im going w this rly, i kno it’s long and rambly and melodramatic and im probably overthinking it and making a mountain out of a molehill and nobody even knows / cares abt me AND my work @ the same time enough to read That Deep into it. but it just fucking sucks that im so uncomfortable and insecure that i can’t comfortably fulfill literally the one single long term goal / life dream that i have. andthe thing that sucks is i can’t talk to Anybody abt this except like... my sister and brother bc they’re the only ppl i genuinely tell everything to, but they don’t have the knowledge and expertise abt art / poetry that like... my poetry prof does, for example. and my poetry prof is one of the best ppl ive ever met and the Only person ive ever met irl who respects and understands my poetry in the exact way i need someone to. she and i have been talking and she rly wants to help me publish my poetry bc she sees merit in my work and knows how bad i want to / how successful it’s been already, but i don’t know how to talk abt this to her bc im embarrassed to tell her abt posting online and being ashamed abt my muses and all that and it just!!! sucks so much bc i kinda want to publish my work @ least once before i graduate and do it semi regularly for the rest of my life? but there’s so much in my way and it’s just! FGGFHDGJGGGG

#purrs #DONT RB #lms if u read please!!! #ALSO!!!! i sound so dumb but i rly hope i didnt offend anyone.... i dont judge anyone but myself for the stuff i do and as for being uncomfy #w sharing my work.... its literally not u its me and my deep dissatisfaction w who i am as a person. and in a perfect world i would b comfy #sharing things abt my life w other ppl but im not and its on me and not bc of anyone else (w the exception of my mom lel) #i guess the aquarius moon rly did jump out 😔 #god i feel so dumb and mean and conceited for posting this but if anyone has suggestions / advice / anything rly i rly appreciate it! #and thank u so much to anyone who took tje time to read this @ all bc like. its a lot i kno im just. a lot

[justemotionalabusesurvivorthings]

(1/?) hello!! im sry if this blog is just for survivors, but i guess i am one in a way? so far? i live with an emotionally abusive mother. it's very confusing,, hurtful, stressing, as she's done tons of good and generous things for me, & isnt just this 100% shit mom. but shes also hurt me TERRIBLY bad. SO BAD. i can acknowledge the good shes done but, i cant just ignore the bad. she claims shes apologized before, and i can forgive, but she continues to hurt me and isnt willing to change

(2/?) she claims it’s “just her” & that i cant force her to be a different person. ive tried to rationalize with her, but i cant. she claims im selfish & only think about how i feel. how i judge others but not myself. she’s hit me, choked me, called me a liar. she says homophobic/transphobic things & recently found my online acc/stuff and i was exposed as bi. im all alone & vry tired. amongst all this, i need a therapist, possibly meds- some sort of mental help/evaluation 4myself n feel blank

3/? ,, i have/am struggling with self harm, intrusive thoughts, terrible fkn anxiety and the whole nine yards,,.. i really need help and a safer environment. im safe physically to some extent (shes not afraid of cops either), not mentally. ive been gaslighted, insulted, called “sensitive”, it all. i have 2 yrs to grad but turn 18 nxt yr. im trying to save $ this year to convince im stable enough to stay with another relative by next summer- ive looked into LGBT shelters, everything-

4/4 this plan is my last resort. im tired of feeling like this. i cling onto good memories, pride stuff i sneak 2 see etc to pass by. also im SO!! sorry if this is the wrong blog for this! i just stumbled across it and felt a hand reach out.. so if u have any help on motivation, depression/mental issues/calm rooms, info on shelters/living in them, moving out, getting thru this sort of thing, lgbtq+ resources or the like for me or anybody!

so there is a lot to unpack here. First off I want you to know that you are welcome here, regardless of the type of abuse or current situation, everyone is welcome here. Not only that but I strongly believe that anyone who has ever experienced abuse, whether it was years ago or this morning, for a short time or all your life, you are a survivor. You were abused, you lived though it, and you’re here, you survived it. And I am so damn proud of you. And those who don’t feel like they can keep going are just as valid, and every time they reach out, they prove just how much of a survivor they really are. Yourself among them.

Not only that, but no matter how nice your mom is, if she hurts you, if she refuses to change her behavior so that she can stop hurting you, then it doesn’t matter what she does or how much she apologizes. Something to keep in mind is that if they were really, truly sorry, then they would work to make sure that it doesn’t happen again. Because THAT is what it means to love somebody, it means trying to be your best you, to support and protect them even if just from yourself. This is regardless of whether its a mistake or a deep character flaw.

Abusers, as much as it may hurt to hear, choose to abuse people, they are fully aware of their actions. If you ever wonder if this is true, then think about how they treat you in public, how they behave around others. Many will find that their abuser becomes a completely different person are others, might even be nicer to you. This is because they know that what their doing is wrong.

And your mom is wrong. You have an ingrained RIGHT to feel safe, and to be able to tell someone when they are hurting you and talk it out with them without feeling invalidated. She’s wrong, your feeling are valid.

This one is gonna hurt too if you don’t already know it, but your mom cannot be rationalized with. I am really, deeply sorry to tell you this because we all wish it wasn’t the case, but trying to rationalize with her will most likely only drain you and hurt worse. I would know.

the things that she has done to you are truly awful and i cannot even to begin to express how sorry I am that she treats you that way. Please know that you can always come here if you need to very or ask questions or anything.

as for resources I’ll keep a look out for stuff that will be most helpful but I dont really have much that can be an all encompassing solution for any one problem, but I can give you want I do have. 

http://yournewapartment.tumblr.com/ ( adulting tips)

http://m.facebook.com/notes/dreamcatchers-for-abused-children/steps-to-take-if-cps-wont-help-an-abused-child/953279954722057    - good for building a case

http://www.glaad.org/transgender/resources

the It Gets Better Project documents the stories of lgbt+ teens to share

https://itgetsbetter.org/

the Trevor Project has 24/7 counselors and a support system where you can meet others going through similar things

https://www.thetrevorproject.org/#sm.001w5ic1r19asdneqfc28j8sqbndf

https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/trevor-support-center/#sm.001w5ic1r19asdneqfc28j8sqbndf

That’s it for now but I’ll keep an eye out for you. Stay safe and please do come back anytime! I’ll be praying for you!

#ask #long post #abuse #emotional abuse #physical abuse #Psychological Abuse #child abuse #sorry for taking so long

[headcanons-everywhere]

thats luego

luego satona

hes gay / pan (nobody rlly figures out which. hes just in general Rlly Into Dudes) and he was one of the people in blu's friend group when blu was a human

and uh

ali ve

witnessed / indirectly caused blu's death (the entire group did but he feels the most guilty over it)

he had a crush on (imma call him blu until i figure out his human name btw ahA) blu even tho he knew blu was straght

he jokingly gives luego shit for it

like lue making kissy noises and acting like hes about to amother blu in love and blus just like "eW BRO STOP!!! KISSING IS GROSS UGH"

but he doesnt care if one of his best friend's gay or pan or w/e as long as he finds someone hes happy with

but blus just personally grossed out by affection in general so thats where the 'giving him shit for it' comes in, ie: laughing in faux-disgust while shoving lue's face away bc luegos still tryina sneak in n smooch him just to ruffle his feathers

stuff like that :)

tho after blu died

well

lemme copy paste

it woNT SEND

[hes tall

n blu uh

is sort of?

luego is def taller tho

kappital - 11/15/2017

hows he feelin about

dead boy

manic pixie dream tarantula - 11/15/2017

dunno the exact relationship yet so idk how hed react but

he was definitely Upset the night it happened

esp since im thinkin he was one of the ones joking like "bro ur gonna fuckin hurt urself" n such bc he was geuinly like "IDK IF THIS IS A GOOD IDEA GUYS" but was playing cool abt it

kappital - 11/15/2017

:0

manic pixie dream tarantula - 11/15/2017

but when blu died from whatever happened (it was an instant accident kinda deal, like a stumble+fall or smthin) and everyone kinda freaked n left, luego was the last one to leave

bc he geuinly didnt know what to do n so he hung back just staring in horror and trying to think of some other option until the grouo called back like "dUDE LETS GO" or smthin n he judt made a rlly frustrated / upset noise before glancing over one last time apologetically / "this is so fucked" kinda look at blu n then turning to run with the rest

bc they knew if police or smthin showed up thered be a fuckton of trouble for them since they prolly had a p bad reputation around town anyways, so itd def look like a crime rather than an accident

so they just

ran

but luego was def one of the ones most fucked up by it tho

he felt rlly nauseated n guilty for a long time afterwards, even after all the rlly bad emotional stuff

kappital - 11/15/2017

thats fucking intense

ive had dreams like that thats scary

manic pixie dream tarantula - 11/15/2017

yE AH

but today like, at this very moment idk where hes at or what hes up to

that im still figuring out

or if hes even still around ngl

but after that most of the group splintered off into being rlly upset with one another n he was prolly the angriest out of the group bc he was the closest one emotionally w/ blu

so thats fun :) ]

OH there we go

:)

he tried to uh

take himself out a few times but after a few failed attempts he was just like "fuck it this is stupid anyways. ill just. idk, ill try to...make the best of it. or something." n thats how he lived to where he is today

openly gay/pan, lived a slightly lavish life style that he liked to show off, drank socially but even then not that muvh bc alcohol is personally gross to him but its a good way to loosen up at big events or w/e

manic pixie dream tarantula - Last Thursday at 1:00 PM

i flip between present n past tense when typing accidently bc techincally "today" / "current" luego uh

died around 20 yrs or so b4 blu was summoned by alexander back into the human world

like he lived a full life n shit but died from some heart problems later in life

but he was p emotionally repressed abt what happened

wouldnt get much out of him unless you openly prodded him about him a lot

like sat him down n seriously tried to pull smthin out of him

but aside from that he was a p content guy :)

also sprry if the messages are fucked, wifi is awful out here aAAAAA

manic pixie dream tarantula - Last Thursday at 2:21 PM

but ye thats a summary of luego for ya

:)))

all his earrings on both ears are diff

no two are the same

n they all have a special meaning to them

OH also

all his earrings on both ears are diff

no two are the same

that all sent out of order omfg

manic pixie dream tarantula - Last Thursday at 5:56 PM

oK im back on good wifi i tjink :)

goo - Last Thursday at 8:37 PM

i've read some of this but it's been a busy day so i'm sorry i'm not ignoring you i just want to get home and read it there so i can elaborate my thoughts and questions to you haha

manic pixie dream tarantula - Last Thursday at 8:37 PM

no no dude ur ok

leila gave me a glimpse of what happened (like a chat screenshot between yall) bc she was askin if u were mad or upset or smthin

i kno ur not ignoring me n im honestly just hopin (if i have the story right??) whichever dog got the weed stuff on accident n ended up with leg spasms is doin ok!!

goo - Last Thursday at 8:40 PM

nah bandit just passed out from weed but miracle got the spasms and he'll be fine it's the usual for him

manic pixie dream tarantula - Last Thursday at 8:40 PM

oH OK

shit man thats still def stressful if at least on some level ahA

glad they sound likr theytr gonna be ok n shit

#blu #luego #alexander #Modern Universe #pre-modern universe