my-private-dump

[my-private-dump]

Falling Sick

Well well, I'm on my last day of MC from flu. It's been bugging the heck out of me since last week, and I've taken multiple light-duty days for my condition. Sad to say, but I've also not been able to meet up with my boyfriend during the weekends. Only until recently have the symptoms seemed to start abating. I better be able to recover by tomorrow, when I finally have to return to camp.

On the bright side, there only seems to be the 12km route march and the GX24, at least on my end. Oh yeah, the graduation parade too. There's two weeks left for us to brush up for the final parade, so I guess there's ample time for everything. Ah well, I'll just continue taking my medication as prescribed and rest myself up.

#sick

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Bunk mates

Well, it's been a long way since I first enlisted into NS. Well, it's not exactly the best experience ever, but seeing as to how many people had it worse than me, I shouldn't be the one to complain. That aside, I do have a concern regarding NS, and it has to do with my bunk mates.

Honestly, while there are some people who I find easier to work with, some can be a pain in the arse to work beside. I can't understand the crippling sarcasm that these people spew out of their mouths sometimes. It's as if even the most basic of questions can be used to make me sound incredibly stupid. Well, I must admit that I do get a little lost sometimes, but there's not really a point in showing that much sarcasm in your replies. I suppose that's also the reason why some of them are single...

That aside, I feel like I should put aside all my hatred. On the bright side, I do have some pretty cool bunk mates as well, so that's a win, I suppose... Also, there's a little over ten more days before the end of BMT, after which I will be sent to DIS for the rest of my sign-on service. Leaving all the hate behind, I do hope that I can encounter better souls that can make my work experience... easier.

#rant #ns

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Field camp

Well well, the week that everyone in army hates is drawing near. I am certainly not looking forward to it. Basically, we will get punished to no end throughout these 5 days. Well, at least by the end of next week, I'll be free once again. Well, my skin condition's kind of a royal pain in my arse right now, since it's giving me itches pretty often. Good luck to myself, I guess~

#personal rant

[my-private-dump]

National service

Well, as I've been in National Service for some time, I honestly don't really have much time and energy to write too many blogs. I mean, there were some nice developments that've transpired recently, I suppose. For one, I actually got into a university course that I applied for, successfully! That's a hurdle cleared. Also, something really exciting happened - I actually have a boyfriend now~

Yeah, it's honestly a little unbelievable, but it's a nice warm feeling, knowing that my feelings are actually reciprocated by someone else. I hope that it can last forever though... On the bright side though, mum did give her approval for us to be together, which is honestly pretty darn wild. I guess things are going in the right direction for me, hehe. One thing to note, though, is that we are approaching some very important parts of our lives respectively. He is about to attend a national examination which determines his future university course, while I am about to enter university after my national service as well. While mum did give her approval for the relationship, she did warn me not to go overboard with conversing with the person. It will definitely have the greatest impact on any of our academics...

Ah well, since I'm already relatively mature, I also have to exercise some caution and self-control from now on. After all, it's an important trait in life to have, and you can't depend too much on your partner alone, am I right?

Tomorrow's my book-in day back to the army, sooooo I'll cut it short here. With all that military punishments and torture, the current state of things does put me at ease to an extent. I hope things can continue to go well for me!

[my-private-dump]

Dildo review: Nothosaur Banner

Variant: small firm

Procurement:

This was in the same delivery package as the Conola, but being a rather lazy bum, I procrastinated on posting my review until today. To summarize, I got it from the Nothosaur flagship store. There was a little of a kerfuffle regarding the delivery of the package, as I definitely did not want mum peeking inside, but I still managed to get my toys discreetly and in one piece.

Delivery:

The dildo came in a plastic bag, and they gifted me with an additional cloth bag to store all 5 of the dildos. The Banner was impressively sized, with a humongous girth. The first time I got the toy, I couldn't even wrap my fingers completely around the toy. Design-wise, it didn't disappoint at all, and was really beautiful to look at. It's monstrous appearance was really a turn-on for me, despite its scarily huge diameter.

Product:

Features

The dildo came with a suction cup that was relatively stable. As this dildo is non-electric, unlike the Jeusn dildo, it does not possess many other unique features. Though there were variants with cum tubes available for purchase, I opted for non-cum tube-using dildos in favour of increased ease of keeping the dildo after usage.

This toy stands out not for its size, but for its thickness. It's honestly so thick that the first time I marveled at it, I never thought that I would be able to take in the beast. The green colour scheme, alongside the details of the beautiful veins along the shaft, are additional points for its beauty.

Also, the toy has a special glow-in-the-dark feature, though the effect can only be seen under really, really dark conditions. Still a cool feature nonetheless.

Material

The dildo appears to be made of platinum-cured silicone, according to the official website. I did the test of sucking on the dildo for 45s, and since I experienced no numbness of mouth, I assume that it is medical-grade silicone that is safe for body use. The material, as with most dildos, is relatively sticky, being a magnet for dust and lint to settle upon should it not be kept in a bag, or well cleaned regularly. While still rather squishy in the "firm" firmness, the rigidity of the dildo, coupled with its already thick shaft, makes this toy pretty good to ride upon. The suction pad also works relatively well, so long as the dildo is placed on a smooth, flat surface, making the riding process quite a breeze.

Size

The Banner is one of the thickest dildos that I have ever bought from the Nothosaur store. The girth is absolutely insane, and riding the dildo is basically equivalent to shoving a soda can up my anal cavity. The bulging nature of the shaft means that it acts as a butt plug of sorts as well. However, its length does make usage of the toy a little annoying. As it is more of a stout toy, I find it a little difficult to thrust it in and out of me sometimes...

Experience

The Banner's humongous shaft means that every powerful thrust into my asshole stretches me out pretty good. As it is not overly rough, it is not exactly a lube hog, though sufficient lube is needed to take in such a huge dildo without tears to my butthole. As the dildo is really short comparative to my other toys, it can be used for... more passionate anal play, though some warm-up has to be taken beforehand to prevent injuries.

Aftercare

This dildo has a dark colour scheme, which could make cleaning the rectum remains a little challenging. Moreover, the urethra of the dildo is rather deep, which I'm a little afraid may accumulate my body fluids over time. However, this problem can be easily solved by using a brush to sweep out the dirt. Otherwise, the dildo is pretty easy to clean.

Summary:

All in all, the Banner is really one of my absolute favorites among my first batch of Nothosaur purchases. As I sized up, however, this dildo is no longer as... stimulating as my current ones. Still a good buy though, and I'd definitely recommend it for prospective buyers.

Dildo rating:

Package - 6/10

Size - 10/10

Design - 10/10

Texture - 4/10

Features - 5/10

Rideability - 8/10

Material - 9/10

Washability - 7/10

Storage - 8/10

Cost - 5/10

Overall rating - 72% (enjoyable)

#dildo #review

[my-private-dump]

Work

Well, these couple months, I have been working as a part-time cashier at a food court. It's honestly pretty hard work for the meagre pay that you receive, and that's part of the reason why few people can stand working in such conditions for long.

As for me, I guess I'm only working there for 1 more month, excluding this February, since I will be enlisting into mandatory national service soon. I'll just push through, and hopefully, I could learn some of the cooking methods in the stall to bring back home by the end of my stint~

#thoughts #feelings #work

[my-private-dump]

Back from the dead

Well, this account has been inactive for some time now. It's primarily due to the hectic work schedule, where I have to work almost every single day. The labour cost of the company has exceeded their monthly budget, which has in turn caused them to assign me to less duties for this week. Though I no longer will have as much pay for this month, I still appreciate the extra time that I have for myself.

Recently, I received my results from a certain... national examination. Though my results were not bad, I'm a little disappointed that I lost out to many of my friends, grades-wise. Well, there's still university, and there's the workplace, so I may have to work even harder from now onwards.

I have applied to a university course, and of course, I hope to get into the courses that I desire. However, going to university means that my work schedule is only going to get more hectic from today onwards. Well, I do hope that I'm able to cope, and attain the motivation to focus purely on my studies. Using my phone as a distraction just won't cut it anymore. As for my blog, I don't even think anyone reads these posts, so I'll just post more infrequently, till the end of university, I suppose.

#thoughts #feelings

[my-private-dump]

Dildo review: Nothosaur Conola

Variant: small firm

Procurement:

After getting the Jeusn dildo, I decided that fantasy toys were generally more appealing and intricately-designed. As such, after a bit of searching, I came across the Nothosaur Toys sex store. There, they offered a variety of customisation options for colour, size and firmness, but I opted to keep the original coloration because of the interesting theme. Due to the bulk purchase that I made, I managed to receive the dildos with free shipment, which would have otherwise cost me US$15. The process of payment was relatively straight-forward, and I chose the express option of UPS Saver to receive the dildos with minimal waiting time. The dildo came with a hefty price tag of US$80, but fortunately, I paid for the dildos at a reduced price due to the 15% discount code I procured from joining their community server. I entered the delivery address as a UPS collection point, which was T-Go at the Tampines MRT station, since it was rather near my living area.

Delivery:

The dildo came in a plastic bag, and they gifted me with an additional cloth bag to store all 5 of the dildos. The size of the dildo, unfortunately, was rather disappointing. The small size of the toy has also contributed to reduced stability of the Conola, making it comparatively wobblier than my other toys. At least the colouration is as displayed in the webpage, and is pretty decent.

Product:

Features

The dildo came with a suction cup that was relatively stable. As this dildo is non-electric, unlike the Jeusn dildo, it does not possess many other unique features. Though there were variants with cumtubes available for purchase, I opted for non-cumtube-using dildos in favour of increased ease of keeping the dildo after usage.

Being modelled after a horse cock, the Conola has a distinctively long body, even at a small size. The head of the dildo is rather broad, which makes entry a little challenging. However, due to the flared nature of the head, upon entry, the dildo is rather easy to ride, if not for the wobbly nature of the shaft.

The body is really smooth compared to the other Nothosaur toys I bought, and the medial ring didn't really do much to stimulate my anal nerves. As such, the head is the only truly stimulating portion of the dildo, making it a rather disappointing purchase (I wish I had bought a larger size).

Material

The dildo appears to be made of platinum-cured silicone, according to the official website. I did the test of sucking on the dildo for 45s, and since I experienced no numbess of mouth, I asusme that it is medical-grade silicone that is safe for body use. The material, as with most dildos, is relatively sticky, being a magnet for dust and lint to settle upon should it not be kept in a bag, or well cleaned regularly. While still rather squishy in the "firm" firmness, the rigidity of the dildo is sufficient for every bump and crease on the body to be felt during the riding process. The suction pad also works relatively well, so long as the dildo is placed on a smooth, flat surface, making the riding process quite a breeze.

Size

Amongst my stash of nothosaur toys, the Conola has to be the easiest toy to tame. Given its really small size and smooth nature, riding the Conola feels a little boring after an extended period of time.

The dildo is between 4-4.5cm in diameter, with its head being the thickest portion of the dildo. Given how smooth the toy is, this causes the Conola to be a rather boring ride in comparison to my other toys.

Experience

The Conola just about matches up with my Jeusn dildo in terms of riding experience. It's not particularly pleasant to ride, though the flared tip makes it slightly more stimulating than the Jeusn dildo. Due to how thin the toy was, sufficient lubricant is required to make sliding up and down the toy easier. Else, it simply flops around while being rode on.

On the upside, it doesn't require as much lubricant, given how smooth its surface is. So long as the anal lining is completely lubricated, riding can probably last for a long time without needing additional lube.

Aftercare

Of course, this dildo is one of the easiest ones to clean, due to its smooth nature and bright colours. So long as I have a scrub to get rid of fecal matter that usually accumulates at the tip, cleaning the toy is rather convenient.

Summary:

This dildo is one of my more disappointing purchases. It is pretty thin and is not as stimulating or filling as my other Nothosaur products. I'll probably have to make a mental note to myself to purchase a larger horse cock dildo should I ever decide to get one in the future (probably a medium- or large-sized one).

Dildo rating:

Package - 6/10

Size - 4/10

Design - 7/10

Texture - 3/10

Features - 3/10

Rideability - 7/10

Material - 9/10

Washability - 10/10

Storage - 8/10

Cost - 5/10

Overall rating - 62% (relatively enjoyable)

#dildo #review #masturbation #anal #bisexual

[my-private-dump]

My Crush

Yeap, today let's talk about my crush.

I've definitely seen my fair share of pretty boys throughout my school years. One stands out, however, as someone who's been in the same class as me for 4 consecutive years.

He is really cute, with a slim yet petite build, and wears a pair of glasses. During my college years, when we were already separated into different schools, I talked with a gay classmate. He convinced me to come clean with my feelings to the person I liked, and though it was definitely very nerve-wrecking, I actually managed to do it. Yeah, I had to type everything I wished to send him into a separate group chat (with only me in it), before actually having the nerve to send it to him.

My crush, as expected, was really surprised. At first, he thought that I was pranking him, since the messages were all sent at the same time. However, soon, he realised that it was the truth and went silent for a while (it was probably school hours when I sent him the messages - I was at home that day).

It was an awkward long wait before he finally responded, but he was a little surprised and dumbfounded as to why I wished to come clean all of a sudden. We exchanged a few words here and there, and honestly, though he confirmed that he was straight, I feel like a huge burden is released from my shoulders. You can't say that I didn't try to be honest with my feelings - I did everything I could to be honest with myself.

Of course, I was a little disappointed then (and still am, to an extent), but I am thankful that he wasn't homophobic. However, I'm still really closeted in terms of my sexuality, and it's pretty difficult for me, truth be told. I want to be able to come clean to others about my sexuality one day, but at the same time, I don't want to be looked down upon by the homophobic ones. It is a little of a dilemma that I have here.

#bisexual #crush #confession

[my-private-dump]

Mum discovered my likes for the... dildo

Hello! Just to clarify, in my previous post, though I did try to hide it from mum as much as possible, she still found out about my collection eventually. Of course, it was really awkward, and I found it incredibly embarrassing to explain it to her.

That was almost a year ago, and nowadays, she has already understood, and come to terms to my bisexuality, albeit hoping I'd still turn out straight one day.

That aside, I have started exploring ways to store my collection of sex toys without my family members ever having to (unintentionally) stumble across them. I really hope they don't, though, since it'll be really embarrassing to have them discover my... expanded collection since then (and not just dildos)...

#bisexual #found out #embarrassing

[my-private-dump]

Dildo review: Jeusn Swinging Vibrator Dildo

Procurement:

The first dildo that I decided to purchase in my life. I first stumbled upon the toy on Lazada. Unfortunately, certain variations of the dildo, such as the swinging and thrusting variants, had run out. As I wished to purchase a vibrating one, I decided eventually to purchase the medium electric variant. The dildo cost S$31.90, and came with a free gift as a token of appreciation for my patronization. To avoid suspicion from my mother, I chose to deliver the dildo to a nearby pick-up point (the 7-11 store near my house).

Delivery:

The dildo's delivery took 2 attempts. The first time, the delivery driver reached the pick-up point before it was open, causing the delivery attempt to end in failure. As such, it was rescheduled for the next day, during which I added a note specifying the opening hours of the drop-off point.

The second delivery, though successful, nearly ended in disaster. The delivery person was probably unfamiliar with the concept of drop-offs to pick-up points, and delivered the package right to my doorstep. To add salt to injury, it was exactly during lunchtime, where my family was right in the living room, enjoying a family meal. Fortunately, the package was discreet as promised, and I was able to pass it off as parts I was planning to add to my to-be-arriving bicycle.

Later, when I was able to isolate myself to open the package, the box containing the dildo had an extremely lewd (and large) display of the toy on its front, and I had to discard the box safely to avoid letting my parents find out. Inside, the dildo was relatively intact. As for the free gift, it comprised of a free tube of lubricant, some wet wipes and a toy cleaning spray, which I'm pretty thankful for.

Product:

Features

The dildo delivered exactly as it promised, comprising of a wire with a button attached that I could use to adjust the frequency and mode of the vibration. There were a grand total of 10 different vibration modes. The first three were increasing intensities of basic vibration, but the other 7 modes each had their own erratic, yet intense, vibrating frequencies. However, the wire meant that each session with me wanting to enjoy the vibrating function required the use of a power bank for it to work. The dildo had a suction cup at its base, that enabled it to be mounted onto smooth and flat surfaces, which meant that crabwalk cowgirl position was pretty convenient to achieve for me.

Material

Though the seller specified that it was made of silicone, its incredibly low price leads me to think that it is probably made of TPE. Having gotten some platinum-cured silicone toys myself, the differences in textures are apparent, confirming my suspicions. However, that does not compromise its quality; the dildo remains rideable and sufficiently firm, meaning that fast and intense riding was possible with sufficient lubricant applied. It also remains relatively easy to clean and maintain, and I have not encountered any problems using it. Of course, to stay on the side of safety, you could definitely choose to purchase dildos that are only made out of silicone (platinum silicone is the ideal, as usual).

Size

Being my first ever dildo, it gave me quite a bit of anal pain in the early days. However, with time, I have managed to accommodate to the size of the toy, and is even able to swallow its entirety, up to the testicular section of it. As long as I have had sufficient foreplay to loosen myself up, there wouldn't be a problem with using the toy. As a medium-sized dildo, it is about the average size of a human penis, and has a diameter of approximately 3cm, and a useable length of about 16cm.

Experience

The dildo has a generally smooth texture, save for the bumpy transition from the penis head to the shaft. Riding the dildo very fast usually does not do too much stimulation to me, and the vibrations usually fail to help me reach orgasm through anal stimulation alone. It is relatively long, so riding the dildo is usually rather easy, except for occasional instances of it popping out of my anus when I lift myself too high upwards. With my 18-year old body, usage of the dildo has probably trained my anus to take toys up to 16cm of depth, and this is probably only going to increase as I progressively increase the size of my dildos. As for the vibration, the vibrator is located at the centre of the body, which spreads out the effect of the vibration throughout the dildo and makes it more difficult to stimulate the prostate. It also tends to overheat and reduce in intensity if left operational over a long time, as with all electric-operated sex toys, making prolonged usage unadvisable.

Aftercare

The dildo's shaft and head are relatively smooth, making the cleaning process for the top part of the dildo hassle-free. However, the presence of a wire makes toy cleaning relatively difficult, as the wire has to be carefully held away from the running water. At times, the wire would also get dirty from anal play and may require some cleaning. Long-term usage of the dildo, alongside numerous washing sessions for aftercare, has caused some rust to form on the exposed metal parts of the wire. As the wire is directly connected to the base of the dildo via a small hole at its base, faecal matter has also entered the hole, where it is virtually impossible to clean. Since the only form of storage they provided was the huge box (with a humongous picture of a dildo on it, I did away with the storage box provided, instead opting to keep it in random storage areas around the house.

Summary:

Overall, it is a relatively decent introductory dildo for anal (or vaginal) beginners who wish to try out penetration for the first time (without the risk of STIs). While it is built for vaginal penetration, it could technically also be used for anal play, though special care has to be taken to clean the anus beforehand, as with all forms of anal penetrative play. My personal... build makes it such that I no longer find pleasure in using this particular toy, as it is too small for much stimulation on my side.

Dildo rating:

Package - 3/10

Size - 3/10

Design - 5/10

Texture - 2/10

Features - 6/10

Rideability - 7/10

Material - 7/10

Washability - 4/10

Storage - 0/10

Cost - 10/10

Overall rating - 47% (below average)

#review #dildo #anal #bisexual #masturbation

[my-private-dump]

First Post

Hello! Recently, I've gotten an interested person to visit my Tumblr blog, so I'll probably post some stories (and reviews) here every now and then. Of course, they will mostly be NSFW~

#blog #nsfw