losja-blog1 - Tumblr blog

losja-blog1 · 7 years

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The truth is that I'm a bad person. But, that's gonna change - I'm going to change. This is the last of that sort of thing. Now I'm cleaning up and I'm moving on, going straight and choosing life. I'm looking forward to it already. I'm gonna be just like you. The job, the family, the fucking big television. The washing machine, the car, the compact disc and electric tin opener, good health, low cholesterol, dental insurance, mortgage, starter home, leisure wear, luggage, three piece suite, DIY, game shows, junk food, children, walks in the park, nine to five, good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters, family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption, clearing gutters, getting by, looking ahead, to the day you die.

#trainspotting #trainspotting (1996)#mark renton #quotes #movies #films #scottish #scotland

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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Shiro: Uh, I will save the princess, even if it means taking on the Galra Empire with my bare…hand.

#I HAVE LITERALLY NEVER LAUGHEDSO HARD #My bare.....................#hand #RIP YOU ACTUALLY MADE THE JOKE #voltron s4 #voltron s4 spoilers #h.

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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10/10 people can’t tell the difference.

#???? difference???????????#voltron s4 spoilers #voltron s4 #voltron

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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self reflection 001.

001. who am I?

I don’t really know who I am. And that would be a fine enough answer, if I wasn’t working on self-reflection. I am, though, so it’s not an adequate reply. I don’t really know - but that’s something I should know. Something I need to know.

I’m just another person, really. I’m another speck of dust among millions. But, also, I’m ever-changing. I’m not the same person I was a year ago. Last year, June 1st, my true transition began.

I sound fake when I write. But I’m not writing for anyone but me. I want to have a record and try to better understand myself. I have come off my antidepressants. Life is tough right now - and I think some self reflection, honest and mindful, will be good for me.

If we go back two years, I would have told you I was a waste of space. That I didn’t know who I was, but I did know that I deserved to die. Depressing, yes. But the teenage mind can be a depressing thing. I am now eighteen, doing much better. I have left therapy. I am off my medications - whether that is a good idea or not, we will later see - but so far, so good. I am cancer free. I’m alive, and that’s... more than I expected.

No, I didn’t kill myself despite each year saying, “I won’t live to see next year”. I’m alive despite my countless suicide notes scrawled and hidden under my mattress. Despite every scar on my body. I’m alive. The cancer didn’t kill me either. We aren’t out of the woods; I have two years to go before my risk properly lessens. I defied the odds.

I defied the odds. You can tell me that was chance - and while I don’t consder myself a very strong person, I like to thin that was strength. Perseverance, it probably a better word.

Guilt.

Had I given up, which I wanted to many times - I’d have let everyone down. The nurses who treated me. The doctors who diagnosed me. My friends. My family. People I didn’t know - people who might hear my story and think, “woah, if she can do it, maybe I can too.”

I’m nothing special. At the same time, I am more special than anyone else - in my life. In my life, I am the center. In your life, you are the center. We are the heroes of our own stories. In the world, I am nothing. In my life, I am everything.

Am I a good person? No. I’m not. But that’s going to change - and I hope this self reflection will guide me there. I’m on my way. Baby steps - and I have to be patient.

I’ll get there - eventually.

#self reflection #diary #writing #sr.

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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Dodie Yellow moodboard!!

requests are open, follow for more like this!!

#y.

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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Bad Company - Bad Company

#m.

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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#h.

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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#p.

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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{ final space - Olan Rogers ( @olanrogers ) - 2018 } -- I failed freaking hard. So, really, hard.

this is my first time making gifs and of course they had to be for this amazing pilot?? seriously. This show looks AMAZING. I have done a lil chibi fanart which is somewhere on my Twitter ( umiiruTV ) but I need to do a full fanart once I get a break in my commissions. In the meantime, I suggest you guys check out Final Space, which will broastcast on TBS in 2018. The pilot can be found here.

RELEASE THE SHRED-UP CARCASSES OF DEPRESSION!! \o/

#edits #olan rogers #final space #gifs #gifset #art #final space tbs #tbs #new show #pilot

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losja-blog1 · 7 years

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