gentlemanbutch

[gentlemanbutch]

my apologies if this has already been posted here but im sharing this. here is what someone said on twitter along w this image:

the central image text reads: “@everyone I HAVE BEEN RELIABLY INFORMED GUARDIAN JOURNALISTS ARE SNOOPING AROUND ASKING FOR TRANS PEOPLE TO TALK TO THEM ABOUT DIY HRT. THEY ARE PARTICULARLY LOOKING FOR UNDER-18S DOING DIY. SHOULDN'T NEED TO BE SAID, BUT DO. NOT. ENGAGE. SPREAD WIDELY. DO NOT ENGAGE. WE NEED THIS NOTICE SPREAD OUT VIA EVERY GRASSROOTS SUPPORT GROUP AND SOCIAL CIRCLE IN THE COUNTRY.

URGENT. IF THEY GET EVEN ONE TO TAKE PART IT BECOMES A NATIONAL CONVERSATION. TOP ALERT.

Guardian journos are apparently asking trans people about DIY. Trans followers: DO NOT SAY ANYTHING TO THEM. NOT A WORD.

I also know I’ve got cis mutuals who have written for the Guardian. Please know I’ve always thought less of you because of that.

- https://x.com/TownTattle/status/1781045092049928551

#cannot begin to describe how unethical this is if true #trans #transgender #ftm #mtf

[gentlemanbutch]

#my first hamster lived an extremely long life and died a very boring death #my second one’s eyes popped out of her skull with absolutely no warning #it was horrifying

[gentlemanbutch]

The way my parents speak to me about my OCD is honestly astonishing after seeing the way total strangers react to others with OCD. Like yes, you get the assholes who don’t get it and think intrusive thoughts are evil/purposeful thoughts we want to be having, but so many people are sympathetic and talk about how awful it must be to have OCD. And…yeah! It is! It nearly fucking killed me as a teen! And you would *hope* that the people who have watched how it has impacted me from my early childhood would, idk, remember it exists and want to be sympathetic when I express that something is bothering me, but they just laugh at me and treat me like a paranoid freak.

#day one billion of wondering why people have children and then don’t bother to get to know them or love them fully #fucking weird behavior man. I just. yeah idk. #parental neglect #ocd #obsessive compulsive disorder #suicidal ideation mention #suicide mention #mental illness

[gentlemanbutch]

Ya know what shout out to butches who wrestle with our butchness because we don’t fit the mold in some way. Butches who aren’t physically strong or naturally caretaking because of physical disability, who need to be cared for, who can’t hold open the door for a femme. Butches with long hair, butches with big hair, butches who express their culture via their hair. Butches who’s masculinity is shaped by their culture, who’s masculinity doesn’t fit the white eurocentric mold. Fat butches, butches with curves viewed as feminine, butches who don’t have skinny, boyish builds. Butches who don’t want to be sexualized, butches on the ace spectrum. Butches who don’t have traditionally masculine interests or mannerisms or whatever. Effeminate butches. Butches who take inspo from gay men. Butches who like the occasional dress or skirt. TRANSFEM BUTCHES!!!!! And any other butches who don’t fit a certain mold!! All butches are good butches and we are all valid.

#butch lesbian #lesbian #butch

[gentlemanbutch]

I just wanna be held and babied by a pretty ass femme 🥺🥺

#please #when is it my turn #lesbian #butch

[gentlemanbutch]

dykes read Fucking Trans Women challenge

#pretty sure i've reblogged before but reblogging again #as an afab person raised in a fundamentalist christian environment #this zine rewired my brain #i mean i'd already unpacked a lot but this just...changed so so so much about how i understand sex or fantasize about it or even just #my understanding of pleasure #okay anyway #lesbian #trans women #fucking trans women #required reading #lgbtq #lesbians

[gentlemanbutch]

idk what it says abt me that i get mildly turned on by the thought of taking care of an exhausted, drained, bone-tired butch.

i wanna take off their shoes and pants, not in a sexual way, in a “lemme do this for you” way, wrap them up in a blanket and give them some food with protein and fats to balance out their blood sugar plus a glass of water and then a hot drink, herbal tea with milk and honey, or cocoa. and after they’ve finished i lead them by the hand to get comfy on the couch. let them lean back against my chest so they can rest upright while they digest and won’t make their tummy feel sick from laying down too fast. i gently help them out of their shirt and then take off my own so we can be skin-to-skin with the blanket wrapped around us. and while they’re resting in my arms like this i wanna give them head scratches, a lil ear massage, nothing forceful, just soothing touch. i give them options: they can vent about their day, or i can tell a silly story to distract them, or we can listen to relaxing music, or just be in silence, whatever feels best in that moment. and then i let my hands and fingers and nails ease their overworked mind into a state of calm. and as they get comfy we slowly slide down until they’re laying on top of me with their head on my chest. i slow the movement of my hands. i rub their back, timed in rhythm with their deepening breath. and then i get to just hold them while they sleep.

#when will it be my turn 😭 #butch #butch lesbian #butch dyke #butch4femme #lesbian

[gentlemanbutch]

✨ Please reblog the polls to make them reach out to as many people as possible, but KEEP IT SPOILER-FREE to make people listen to the music with an open mind 💖 Artists and titles will be revealed after the poll's conclusion, check the original post for an update! ✨

#are you really an OFMD fan if you haven’t listened to this song #(not a spoiler it just fits the show very well)

[gentlemanbutch]

This is what an evil boop looks like.

[gentlemanbutch]

[gentlemanbutch]

I kinda lived half of 2023 (maybe more) like a drowning rat in a bucket but this year I'll live like a normal rat. outside of a bucket

[gentlemanbutch]

Shoutout to disabled butches who wanna be strong or muscular or physically capable of protecting your community but have a lot of challenges or just outright can’t.

#got medical confirmation that yes indeed I am actually dealing with the health problems I’ve been saying I’ve been dealing with #and that’s so validating but also…I wish they weren’t real. I don’t wanna be sick. #butch #disabled butch #butches #butch lesbian #lesbian #butch for femme

[gentlemanbutch]

Why does the government keep making me explain to my parents that you can find porn everywhere

#context is that this stupid state passed legislation supposedly restricting access to ‘porn websites’ #but like. how are you gonna regulate that? especially when porn is everywhere? #like lol buddy tumblr already tried and guess what. it didn’t work #random #politics

[gentlemanbutch]

I have to talk on the phone a lot for work, and every so often I get to talk on the phone with other autistic people...which is an absolute delight, except my ability to talk on the phone goes completely out the window. It's like I can mask/mimic things better when I'm talking to an allistic person, but when I'm on the phone with another autistic person, there are going to be a ton of awkward pauses and interruptions and it's going to be weird. But also very nice, because they don't seem to mind.

#i have a coworker and another person I talk to every so often for work and our phone calls are just. kind of disastrous #but they're also so nice and i actually genuinely feel engaged even though there's not really a social script to follow #and I can't fake my way through it #idk it's weird #autistic #autistic adult #actually autistic #neurodivergent #disabled

[gentlemanbutch]

I would agree, anything is better than nothing. But KN95s, KF94s, and N95s are all better. Look for local mask blocs -- even if you don't have one in your city, sometimes they'll ship around the state!

In terms of glasses fogging, that CAN mean it's not fitted properly, but doesn't always (I don't remember where I read this but I'm sure there's a source out there that explains this in depth). My 3m aura N95 tends to fog my regular glasses a little, but not my stoggles -- so I wonder if part of it is the fit of my glasses more than my mask (the stoggles sit differently on my nose).

I don't have asthma but have long COVID, and deal with shortness of breath sometimes. A 3M aura can be hard to wear in hot environments or for long periods of time (though I do it when need be); KF94s have felt less restrictive. I feel safer in an Aura, but if I'm in an environment with good air flow, I'll wear a KF94.

the way that no one wears a mask at my local LGBTQ clinic, and in fact comments on my mask like it's just this hilarious little idiosyncrasy that I still wear one and not because I'm immunocompromised and we're in the middle of a pandemic ... as if there isn't an airborne virus that literally fucks up your immune system ... as if we didn't lose a generation of queer people to another virus that fucks up your immune system ...

#covid #covid 19 #masks #masking #covid isn't over #long covid #disability justice #disabled #disability rights #disability advocacy #social justice

[gentlemanbutch]

TME and TMA as intersexist terms: as written by an intersex transfem

I’ve had a few different people in my inbox asking me why I view these terms the way I do. In particular, why I claim it’s intersexist. So, I thought I’d lay out a few examples, so everyone can understand where I’m coming from.

Imagine an intersex woman. She was assigned female at birth by her doctors, and was able to go about her childhood as a woman with no inclination that anything was amiss. Sure, she didn’t experience certain parts of puberty, but puberty was different for everyone, right?

But, later in life, she learns she has Turner syndrome. This is an intersex condition where a woman has only one X chromosome, rather than the usual two.

Soon after she learns this, she finds that laws are being made to attempt to keep trans women out of women’s spaces (often specifically sports) which use chromosomes as a defining factor of womanhood.

Would this intersex person be considered “transmisogyny affected”? She has been raised as a cisgender woman with no problems regarding being ‘clocked’, but she is also a direct target of transmisogynistic laws. She lies in a gray area.

Now, let’s go to another intersex person. Imagine an intersex man with PAIS. AIS is an intersex condition where babies are born with testes and XY chromosomes, but their body is immune to or can’t respond to androgens (which includes testosterone). Intersex people with partial AIS (PAIS) often develop a vulva and clitoris during puberty.

This intersex person identifies as a man, and he was assigned male at birth. However, his body does not produce testosterone, and he went through a feminizing puberty. To the average eye, he appears to be a woman now because of this.

Would this intersex person be considered “transmisogyny affected?” He was assigned male at birth, and now appears to be a woman, much like many transfems. However, if many saw how he looks now, stating that he is a male, they would probably clock him as transmasc. He was raised as a boy until puberty, and then faced astrozcization from his peers when he began a puberty that feminized him. What he was facing was a form of intersexism where transmisogyny was playing a huge part. Does his childhood matter? Can one become TME over time, when they were TMA as a child? Again, he lies in a gray area, where the answer is not quite so simple.

What about the “opposite”, per se — an intersex woman who had a masculinizing puberty? She has aromatase deficiency, which means that many ‘male’ hormones (which would usually be converted to ‘female’ hormones) would remain unconverted. She identifies as a woman, and was identified as a female at birth and was raised, until puberty, as a female. But now, she would be clocked as a trans woman upon looking at her. What does that make her? Is it different from the previous example? How and why? This intersex person also lies in a gray area. How she should be described with these terms is not clear.

And keep in mind, these are all relatively simple examples. All of the examples I listed self-identify as cisgender. But there are intersex people who are trans in any direction you can imagine.

If that last example identified as a trans woman, because she is now clocked as one, would you be able to say she’s wrong for that? What about if she identified as transmasculine, because of her experience with puberty? What if she’s multigender, bigender or genderfluid, and says she’s both transmasc and transfem because of her complicated experiences? Would that make her a TMA transmasculine person? But I thought that transmascs were all TME? That’s how it’s so often framed, anyway.

The reason why these questions are so difficult to answer is because these terms were not made with intersex people in mind. Very real intersex transfems were pushed to the wayside in favor of centering the perisex view of transgenderism. Intersex people are nothing but an inconvenient little afterthought, annoying perisex people with their demand for “inclusion” and “consideration”. (As per usual.)

You cannot simply make a new gender binary and say, “No, really, this time everyone fits into these two categories! Forcing people to confine themselves to these two rigid labels which are shown as opposites, and as never interacting, will definitely include everyone this time!!” No matter what the contents of the new binary is, it’s not going to work, because sex and gender alike are too complicated for that. There will always be people in the gray area.

This isn’t even getting into the fact that these terms, for all intents and purposes, seem to have been popularized by and associated with the Baeddelism movement around 2017, which was essentially “Radical Feminism 2: We’re Trans Women, So It’s Fine!” This movement is known for chronic villainization of trans men and non-binary people who aren’t transfem. (They act like this with cis people too, but noticeably less so than they do with non-transfem trans people. How curious.) Think along the lines of how regular radfems treat all men (and who they deem to be men) as inherently morally disgusting scum who deserve to be attacked.

Methinks that maybe these terms aren’t the neutral, fact-based descriptors of oppression that many people nowadays tout them to be, considering that.

So, yeah. “Transmisogyny exempt” and “transmisogyny affected” as terms: not even once. Listen to intersex people, stop trying to make sex and gender into binaries, and for the love of God, stop drinking the queer seperationist koolaid!

#I don’t get into discourse but god this #like idk attempting to separate trans people by saying some of us are never oppressed in certain ways makes no sense #because you have intersex trans people #and you also have transmascs who get mistaken as transfems #idk it’s always seemed weird to me. it’s not something I really talk about and I’m open to other viewpoints #but also as someone who resonates with the intersex label after experiencing really masculinizing traits of PCOS #that I was ostracized for as a teen #and as a transmasc person #it’s just sorta like…gender and sex is weird and I don’t care to put myself in a box. if you want to go ahead but I will not #intersexism #intersex #sexism #transandrophobia #transmisogyny #tme #tma #transphobia #reductive labels #exclusionism

[gentlemanbutch]

txf textposts part 6

#god I love them #the x files #mulder and scully #xfiles #x files #dana scully #fox mulder #the xfiles