weiss: crushes are the worst
ruby: yeah whenever i’m near someone i have a crush on i start acting stupid
weiss: you’re always acting stupid
ruby: yeah don’t think about it too much
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Blake: How did you get her to go out with you?
Ruby: Well she moved in across the hall.
Weiss: And she slowly wore me down.
Ruby: Like a river carves a canyon!
Weiss: Except this river kept showing me her Pokémon cards.
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from howard y bernadette
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I’m a red-blooded corn-fed AMERICAN MAN and if I wanna get my tits chopped off that’s my god-given right as a tax payer.
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Today's Daily Degurechaff is… another mincing mockingbird quote
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Such is the life of an adventurer
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squint for me real quick
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Another dream comic. Had a dream where I was tied to a chair in a dark room and some hooded figures killed me after I begged for my life—but then I got caught in a time loop and so I kept trying to figure out what I could say to get them to not shoot me but they killed me no matter what I said. Started just shouting random stuff eventually.
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The tiger
He destroyed his cage
Yes
YES
The tiger is out
"The Tiger" by Nael, Age 6
Prints
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Customer: NIER AUTOMATA. VIDEO GAME
DMV: 2 BLUNTS 9 SLUTS
Verdict: DENIED
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Stop me if you hate the concept: short, fat, hairy lady gets isakai'd into a high fantasy, and instead of "oh look at all these ethereal elves woe for I am but a flawed mortal" routine she lands in Dwarf territory and is immediately revered as the most enchanting and desirable maid in all the land. This immediately becomes a zesty romantic drama. Thoughts
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Man, the flesh sucks. I'm gonna abandon it for the machine.
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i hate it when i cant even write a poem about something because its too obvious. like in the airbnb i was at i guess it used to be a kids room cause you could see the imprint of one little glow in the dark star that had been missed and painted over in landlord white. like that's a poem already what's the point
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