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The thing about having irl friends who also listen to tma is that every single fucking birthday card they give you has a hello jon in it somewhere. I open the card and i’m already looking for it. It’s hidden somewhere and it fills me with rage when i find it

The fun mix up this year is that there was also a “Mr Bonzo’s on his way!” in one

#i love my friends #hello jon apologies for the deception #mr bonzo #the magnus archives #tma

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Everything is like “QUEER history” and “List of QUEER young adult books” or “Top 10 QUEER movies” and queer this and queer that and for the love of god please just say LGBT.

#queer #lgbtqia #queer history #pride

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"Omnipotent guidance" this "Divine intuition" that well my "Divine Intuition" is actually some guy named John and he tells me not to eat people [walks directly into a telephone pole]

#and you don't listen to him #arthur lester #john doe #malevolent #malevolent podcast

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Darrien Laurel

#the magnus protocol #tmagp #tmagp 13 #darrien laurel

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Episode thirteen really be like: (lists about a hundred morally awful things he has done wrong) “I have never done anything wrong ever in my life. Give me my goddamn money.”

#and then he got eaten by horrors i guess #what an amazing episode #the magnus protocol #tmagp

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Scrolling through the tmagp tag before listening to the episode and trying to figure out what it’s about is honestly so much fun for the conspiracy theory part of my brain.

What i’m getting from episode 13 is that a finance bro gets his shit wrecked by metallic bugs and also celia and the mysterious jack are there

#whelp time to go listen #and make additions to my tmagp conspiracy board #the magnus protocol #tmagp

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MAGNUS PROTOCOL EPISODE ON MY BIRTHDAY LETS GO

#AND malevolent updated this week #happy birthday to me #tmagp #the magnus protocol

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“average person encounters 1 eldritch horror a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person encounters 0 eldritch horrors per year. Horrors Arthur, who has an elder god in his eyeballs & encounters over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

#arthur lester #malevolent podcast #john malevolent #spiders georg

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It’s the middle of the night and I’m getting emotional about Shakespeare again

“Or, as the snail, whose tender horns being hit,

Shrinks backward in his shelly cave with pain,

And there, all smother’d up, in shade doth sit,

Long after fearing to creep forth again;

So, at his bloody view, her eyes are fled

Into the deep dark cabins of her head…”

This is a quote from Venus and Adonis, a prose poem that was one of the most popular things Shakespeare published in his time.

This comparison feels so personal to me not just because of “tender horns” and “shelly cave” to describe a simple snail, but because I remember being a kid playing with snails and watching them do this exact thing - hide in their shells after being poked on the eye stalks. And to think that that must be a shared experience between me and a playwright who lived centuries ago…

Idk, I just feel like there’s something to be said about the universal experience of being human and watching and appreciating something as tiny as a snail, and that maybe things like this are why Shakespeare’s work has remained popular for this long. An endless chain of people looking at his work and thinking “oh! I know what that’s like; that means something to me.”

#i could write essays on the metaphors in this poem honestly #also the dedication at the beginning of it sounds extremely homoerotic #especially for a poem written about a tragic love story #happy birthday shakespeare #shakespeare #william shakespeare #venus and adonis #poetry #snails

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The Scottish Play

A silly comic based on the legend that the reason Macbeth is cursed is because Shakespeare used actual witches’ spells in it, and the witches placed a curse on him for it.

I did this last year and am now posting it in celebration of Shakespeare’s birth/deathday.

A bonus:

#i’ve made a short series of these #might post them later if the mood strikes me #the other two are for romeo & juliet and midsummer night’s dream #shakespeare #william shakespeare #adventures of william shakespeare #the scottish play #macbeth #comic #short comic

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You heard it here first folks; the fifteenth fear is the UK government and they are sending Mr Bonzo after your blood

#when you really think about it #are the extinction and the uk government really all that different? #probably #i’m from africa i don’t know shit about uk politics #the magnus protocol #tmagp

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“Jesus Christ…” “I go by Alice now, actually” is the spiritual successor to “Jesus Christ.” “Present and accounted for!”

#and i love them both #the magnus protocol #tmagp #malevolent #malevolent podcast

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“I think I’m done with Magnus stuff” Sam, my brother in christ, this is called the Magnus Protocol and we are at episode twelve. You may be done with magnus stuff, but magnus stuff is not done with you

#the magnus protocol #tmagp #sam khalid

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A Guest For Mr Spider

A book fully bound and illustrated by me :)

A Guest for Mr. Spider

From the library of Jurgen Leitner.

Knock knock.

Who is it, Mr. Spider?

It’s Mr. Bluebottle, and he’s brought you a cake.

Mr. Spider doesn’t like it.

Knock knock.

Who is it, Mr. Spider?

It’s Mrs. Fruit, and she’s brought you some flowers.

Mr. Spider doesn’t eat flowers.

Knock knock.

Who is it, Mr. Spider?

It’s Mr. Horse, and he’s brought you his son.

Mr. Spider wants more.

Mr. Spider wants another guest for dinner.

It is polite to knock.

(PS I did this like a year ago and it’s been lying around in my room since then. Figured I may as well inflict it on the rest of the fandom too. Sorry for all those I have inadvertently sacrificed to the Web, but i’m sure Annabelle Cane will be happy for the company 🕷️)

#the magnus archives #tma fanart #mr spider #the web #a guest for mr spider #long post

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now that i am a real adult i am starting to realise. media lied to me about the availability of rooftops to go hang out on. every day i wish i could be hanging out on a rooftop somewhere looking cool as fuck

#as a kid i used to climb on random roofs all the time #and id sit up there and read and eat more sugar than what was good for me #no one could stop me because they couldn’t figure out how to reach me #and then one day a dude caught me climbing on his roof #and was like “YOURE THE REASON MY ROOF HAS BEEN LEAKING YOU LIL SHIT” #and i climbed down on the other side and sprinted away #and once he moved out i just went back at it #fun times

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This is fascinating in a morbid kind of way. Good (probably not good) to know the unethical body part business is still going strong I guess.

The podcast is the Magnus Protocol, a horror anthology podcast by Rusty Quill. The post was referencing an episode about a creepy tattoo artist stealing a corpse with a weird tattoo of a boat that was unearthed in an old cemetery. You should totally listen to it! :)

Diversity win! The creep stealing tattooed corpses from the medical examiner’s office uses they/them pronouns!

#the magnus protocol

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Tmagp Monster Chart (as of episode 11) @patchpane

#the magnus protocol #tmagp