we-want-a-shrubbery

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When I was younger and researching the autism diagnosis criteria and symptoms, I thought “oh I couldn’t POSSIBLY be autistic.” Because when I read “takes everything literally” I thought it literally meant EVERYTHING and I was like “I don’t take EVERYTHING literally, just most things!” And I just realized the other day that it didn’t actually mean EVERYTHING and that was an overstatement.

#wait unrelated to the issue #(well actually kind of related since i seem to be one of the people who never understood this) #anyway the eyesight test thing makes SO MUCH SENSE once you put it like that #I used to always look away from the board with the letters when i walked into the room before taking my glasses off for the test #because i was afraid of seeing the letters too early and remember them and thus accidentally ruining the test I- #.... whoops #now that i think about it it makes a lot of sense that they don't actually care about that.

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A Vulcan named Stork works at the Terran adoption agency. Parents always request that he be the one to deliver their child to them.

#<3 #star trek #(kinda) #vulcans

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Hi, I don't know or follow you, but I have to say you have the best user name

Thank you! Tbh, I'm kinda proud of it, too :D

#personal

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Thank you so much for doing this commission, I'm delighted with how well it turned out!!

Super cool commission I did for @we-want-a-shrubbery ! This was a fun little challenge for me!

#personal #commission

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There are people in the comments of the Wired interview who are like "idk what critical role is but they all seem like fun maybe I'll look it up" which is the FUNNIEST possible way to accidentally fall into 2000 hours of content

#I liked dnd and wanted to watch a good stream of a nice group playing (this was in like 2015 or 2016) #Stumbled over CR and watched a random episode #Liked it and looked them up #Saw that I would have had to catch up on like 30 episodes and was like: nope #(this was one of the most stupid decision of my life btw) #Got waay more into dnd again about 2 or 3 years ago and could not escape CR which is why I did eventually cave #Am currently in the middle of catching up not on 30 but on over 300 episodes (not that i'm not loving every second of it) #critical role

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I know that Peter’s Jackson Lord of the Rings trilogy technically has flaws but also….it doesn’t. It’s perfect.

#aaah now i need to watch the movies again #right now #i can't wait for the yearly march rewatch #i'm so emotional about this #lotr

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you have to roleplay your url every time you open tumblr how screwed are you

#eki eki eki eki ptang zoomboink wswswaaajdjw #<- this screwed i guess

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#birb <3

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The garden-path sentences walking into the bar counter the bartender. They are thrown out for creating confusion.

• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

• A question mark walks into a bar?

• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

• A synonym strolls into a tavern.

• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

• A dyslexic walks into a bra.

• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony

- Jill Thomas Doyle

#it's late this is the best i could do #also i love this #linguistics

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#trees <3

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I've been at a dog sledding farm once and the guy in charge explained that dog sleds have actual mechanical brakes. Because the dogs will not. stop. running. They listen to commands like left and right but if you want/need to take a break, you have to brake the whole sled manually like a goddamn soapbox (not apruptly ofc!) and tie it up while you rest, otherwise those dogs will just be like: what? take a break? not on my 10 hour sledding tour, I'm barely done with my warm-up.

They love working so much, those were genuinely the happiest dogs I've ever seen in my life!

There's a lot of dumb ass animal cruelty takes in general but my favorite is the people who think you need to force sled dogs to pull.

Have you ever walked a dog before in your entire life? They love to pull. They're the pullingest damn things you ever saw. They'll merrily rip your rotator cuff in half like a phone book for the chance to stick their own face into a pile of old feces. They'll drag you down the road while you go through all 5 stages of grief trying to make them stop.

There are hundreds of products on the market promising to get ordinary non sled dogs to stop pulling their hapless owners down the road and spilling their iced coffees. People have gone so far as to use electric collars to try and zap sense into their poor stupid labradoodle that wants nothing more but to suicidally pull itself and everyone it loves into the snarling maw of the nearest leash reactive pit bull.

A dog that's allowed to pull, nay, encouraged to pull, is probably the most self actualized animal on the planet right after seagulls that live somewhere with food stands outdoors.

#srsly the only dogs that are above sled-pulling (nordic) dogs in terms of self-fulfilment #are probably border collies that are actually allowed to herd sheep #a happy dog is one that has a) physical activity b) a task and c) unlimited belly rubs #dogs

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#potatoes

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whoops

#he's like the turin turambar of shakespeare #or i guess turin is the hamlet of tolkien #shakespeare

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I had a thought about kudos on AO3. I know fic writers frequently express how much we love comments, and I really do love and cherish comments.

But kudos are also pretty amazing. A kudos means that somebody, more often than not somebody I have no personal connection to at all, found my fic out of thousands of others and chose to spend their time reading it. Bookmarks too are amazing, even the ones that are just marking an intention to read later. Just knowing someone wants to read my fic is flattering!

Even one kudos means that someone took a chance on my writing and spent precious time reading it, and I'm truly grateful for that, and honoured.

#yes 100% this!! #comments are always amazing and encouraging but no one should feel pressured to always write one #and leaving kudos is a great way of quickly telling us that you liked the fic #writing #ao3

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#spring #idk why but maybe because there are quite a few flower descriptions/scenes in To Partake?? #and my mind instantly made the flowers = spring connection?

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my toxic trait is being fervently convinced that if i ever came across a dragon irl we would make eye contact and understand each other at a primal level of transcendental trust instead of charring me into a crispy onion

#same

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hey I want to see something

take this quiz (https://dlcincluded.github.io/MQ/) and then tell me about your score.

if you're autistic plus another overlapping type of neurodivergent, choose the autistic option. self diagnoses are valid.

choose other neurodivergent if you are neurodivergent but not autistic. again, self diagnoses are valid.

check out the monotropism theory of autism (https://monotropism.org/)

#220 and autistic #the theory does make a lot of sense to me on the first glance #i have to read a little more about it now #i do also have adhd which might be a reason why my score is so high #once i'm distracted from a task it's over for me so my brain just tries not to let me get distracted at all