thinoblivion

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✨Doing it for a gentle back✨

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Every time you say no thank you to food, you say yes please to thin.

#ed bllog #bing3 eating #tw edd #bulemiia #bul1m14 #th1n #ana trigger #bulimima #an0r3c1a #disordered eating thoughts #th1nsp1r4t10n #i wish i was thinner #i need to be thin #th1gh gap #i need to lose this weight #i will be thinner #pro for me not for thee #th1n$po #th1nsp1ration #thigh g4p #thin$p0 #thinner is better #thinneristhewinner #thinsperation #ana stuff #anatumblr #tw ana shit #tw ana diary #ana and mia #ana dairy

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Quod me nutrit, me destruit.

(What nourishes me, destroys me.)

#ed bllog #bing3 eating #tw edd #bulemiia #bul1m14 #th1n #ana trigger #bulimima #th1gh gap #an0r3c1a #th1nsp1r4t10n #i wish i was thinner #i need to be thin #disordered eating thoughts #i need to lose this weight #i will be thinner #pro for me not for thee #th1n$po #th1nsp1ration #thin$p0 #thinner is better #thigh g4p #thinneristhewinner #thinsperation #tw ed relapse #ed relapse #ed disorder #tw ed diet #ed behaviour tw #ed bullshit

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~ Amy & Roger's Epic Detour, Morgan Matson

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@missstupidcupid

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Hey 👋

Hello!

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2023.07.17

Tonight is hard. My mind is all over the place. I finally have 3 weeks of payed vacation, and it's summer. And I feel like this summer and vacation is going to waste because of this fucking illness.

I've been to the beach ONCE. ONCE. And my fiancee and his daughter goes to he beach EVERY DAY. They always ask me if I wanna go with them, and I always say no. Why? Because I just can't manage to do it. I really want to, but my head won't let me. This illness won't let me. I'm just to scared.

I ate McDonald's earlier tonight, but sadly I purged some of it. I just can't risk to gain anything. This is really spiraling. And I don't know now what to do.

Should I talk to my fiancee? Should I tell him about this? But I don't want to seek help. I just need to lose weight. If I lose sight my body might start working again. I just wanna feel light and dainty.

Help.

#ed bllog #bing3 eating #bulemiia #bul1m14 #tw edd #4norexla #bulimima #anablr #tw ana rant #notprojustusingthetags

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How a miscarriage triggered my relapse

2023.07.17

Hey everyone! (I know you're not that many, but I love the few of you who are actually reading this.)

I haven't been active here in a while, and there's lots of reasons for that, but the main reasons are that I've had so much to do with work and at home, that I've actually been trying to be healthy and stop over eating, and that me and my fiancée have been tryin to create a family.

In January we decided to start trying to conceive, and I actually thought it would be a piece of cake. Boy, I was wrong! In May I got a doctor's appointment to get an answer for why I hadn't gotten pregnant yet and the result said PCOS. I didn't get much info on the topic except that people with PCOS doesn't ovulate as often as other people, and that the solution is weightloss. So I started eating healthy (but with a calorie deficit) and excercising more. Result: nothing. I didn't lose any weight at all. Which was devastating.

One month ago I finally got a positive pregnancy test!!! But one week later I had a miscarriage. The ground beneathe me just fell apart. I felt so inadequate. My body can't even do the one thing it's meant to do. And my head was filled with questions: What if I never can get pregnant? What if I get pregnan again, and again, and again and they all just end up in miscarriages? What if IVF doesn't work either? What if I'm meant to live my life like this forever?

Immediately I knew I had do try to lose some weight for real, and thus my relapse. I lost all will to even try to live a healthy life, and here I am. And I don't regret it. Losing weight is now my main focus, and I don't have to put much focus on the baby making.

Let's do this.

#ed bllog #bing3 eating #bulemiia #bul1m14 #tw edd #tw ed but not sheeran #pro for me not for thee #tw ed descussion #ed bullshit #sweetsp0 #th1n #ana trigger #th1nsp1r4t10n #disordered eating thoughts #i need to lose this weight #i will be thinner #th1gh gap #th1n$po #thin$p0 #th1nsp1ration #thinner is better #thinneristhewinner #an0r3c1a #ana and mia #ana dairy #ana is my friend #ana rant #ana shit #ana0rex1a #anatumblr

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"You can never be too rich or too thin."

#ed bllog #bing3 eating #bulemiia #bul1m14 #tw edd #tw ed but not sheeran #pro for me not for thee #tw ed descussion #ed bullshit #sweetsp0 #th1nsp1r4t10n #disordered eating thoughts #i need to lose this weight #i will be thinner #th1gh gap #th1n #th1n$po #th1nsp1ration #thin$p0 #thinner is better #thinneristhewinner #ed not sheeren #an0r3c1a #ana0rex1a #ana and mia #bulimima #@n@ buddy #@na buddy #bu1imia #bul1mic

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there’s a fine line between restricting and restricting

one leads to a binge episode and one leads to weight loss.. good luck finding the right one!

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2023-04-02

Long time no see...

I haven't been active here in a very long time, and I think it's partly because this site is full of bots, lol.

So, a little update; I've gained more, and I'm up at an obese BMI again for the first time in 7 years.

Me and my fiancée have started trying to get pregnant, and so far; no luck. We've only tried twice, and I know it usually takes more time to create a baby, but I feel so damn misrable and like something's wrong with me. But on the other hand I can now wait and start losing weight. I feel like I don't want to get pregnant until I'm thinner. But I also feel stressed because my fiancée's 15 years older than me, and even tho he's appears younger and healthier than me physically, I don't want him to be too old. Also, I'm soon 28, and I've learned that your fertility chances decreases a lot after 25... IDK what I want. Right now I feel empty and sad, and like a big failure.

#sad #depressiv #anarec1a #bulemiia #bul1m14 #ed but not sheeran #ed bllog #bing3 eating #mentally tired

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26/12-2022

Hello everyone! How have you been?

I'm so glad that this year will be over soon, and I'm so damn happy that christmas is over! I've been pigging out like crazy this holiday and I have never been more ready to start over! I am so damn ready to restrict like hell!

Are you ready?

#tw ana diary #ana trigger #ana stuff #anarec1a #tw ana shit #tw mia #bulimima #bulimba #bullima #bul1m14 #bing3 eating #ed bllog #tw ed relapse #ed but not sheeran #ednotsheeran #ed relapse #tw ed vent #tw ed sheeran

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(via violentwavesofemotion)

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When you see it, REBLOG IT.

Depression Hotline: [phone]

Suicide Hotline: [phone]

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: [phone]

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

If you ever want to talk: My Tumblr ask is always open.

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4/12-2022 Some kind of internal stress

Well, Hello!

How are you doing today? I went to that dinner party last night, that I talked about. They had made a reservation at a restaurant in the city, where they had a huge christmas buffet. At first I felt like I wanted to pig out, but I actually kept in under control. I ate a lot less than other did, which made me feel pretty good. We did drink some alcohol, and later, a few of us, went to a local dance club. I actually had a very fun night and the company was fantastic. I've never had a job like this, where I actually feel like a part of the group and where people actually are genuinely nice to me. ...But today it's worse. I'm not hungover (thank God), but I feel like I have this massive internal stress. My heart is pounding and my pulse is going fast. I have a heard time focusing on the most simple tasks, and I feel like I just can't sit down and relax. But at the same time I'm so tired, I just want to sleep. I'm planning to clean the apartment, maybe that can ease my mind a bit. I started my morning but eating two toasts with cheese and tomato, and some nutella afterwards. Why? I have no idea, maybe because I have no self control and I feel like "I deserve this" after a night out (even tho I don't). I really need to get my priorities straight.

#tw ed vent #ed but not sheeran #tw edd #ednotsheeran #ed bllog #bing3 eating #bullima #bulimba #th1nsp1r4t10n #i wish i was thinner #th1n #i need to be thin