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ccasey0 · 1 month

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alright, this isn’t related to HBT at all, but I like it too much not to share. so, say hello to the Spirit Au!!

starting with Casey, The Spirit of the Night.

I’ve got more drawings of him since he’s my fav to draw. Now for his lore!!

Casey lived his whole life in service of The Celestial in the Spirit Tree. He loved Celestial, and devoted his everything to Them. The Celestial is the master of the spirits. The God of gods. The highest of high. He is the one who creates spirits. And Casey was soon to become one. Everyone knows that Celestial was planning on appointing spirits for the Day and the Night. And Casey and his twin were the top options. They were closer than ever. They were never apart. They did everything together. But Casey was the one who worked hardest to earn Celestial’s approval. He worked so hard to be chosen for the spirit of the Day. The most important. The sun, the light, the bringer of life and happiness. But when the time came, and Celestial was choosing who would be which spirit, all that work went to waste. It was all for nothing. Because they chose Dellta. They chose her over him. She never did anything to deserve that. Of course Casey loved his twin. But Dellta was the one who relaxed all day. Played in favor of working. Acted like everything was fine and that they had all they could ever want. But Celestial chose her anyway. Why? Why not him? After everything he did for them, all the hard work, all the hours of labor, all the time he spent trying to please them. Was it all for nothing? His sister was overjoyed, but all Casey could feel was anger and despair. And then Celestial made him the spirit of the Night. The moon, the darkness, the bringer of death and sorrow. The least liked. Casey knew that some people down on earth worshiped the moon, but those people were the poor and the weak. The smallest of villages. And it wasn’t even power that Casey wanted. It was just that he had done everything he could for Celestial, only for them to completely disregard him. He hates that. He hates Celestial. He might have even hated Dellta and her joyful smile at that moment.

Also Casey Sketches!!

Oke, now for Dellta! I only have one drawing of her for now, but I definitely want to draw her some more.

Lore time!!!

Dellta had always been the happier of the twins. She played more with the other immortals and spirits while her brother worked to please the Celestial. She knew how important Celestial was, but she didn’t see why Casey had to put all his time towards making them favor him. And she never expected to be chosen for the spirit of the Day. Celestial just gave the role to her. Which meant she had somehow become his favorite. After that, she started doing just what her brother had been doing. Following the Celestial around in her free time and doing things for them to make their view of her even better. She also loved being worshipped. She really enjoyed all the offerings and gifts she received from the humans. And she loved making them all super excited when she sent them a little sign or a gift in return. She was certainly more enthusiastic about being worshipped by the mortals than her brother. She guessed that he just didn’t like the fact that all their offerings were either sacrifices or charms or the occasional food basket. Plus, he had become much quieter and distant ever since the ceremony. Dellta didn’t know why. He had become a spirit, just like he wanted. Was he hoping for something else. She didn’t know. But whenever she asked, he avoided the questions and brushed her off, pushing her further and further away. While they still did almost everything together and they were still extremely close, Casey just started to want to be alone more often and he refused to explain why. He still smiled, but not as often. He still hugged her, but they became shorter. He still loved her, and she still loved him. But he had changed. And there was nothing Dellta could do about it. She couldn’t figure out why he had become like this, he just had. But she stopped caring after a while. She just started putting her attention towards her worshippers when Casey didn’t want to talk to her.

I don’t have any extra drawings of Dellta, but I have a picture of the mountain!

The giant tree in the middle is the Spirit Tree, which serves as the bridge between the earth and the sky. The mountain is famous for being the largest and most spiritual mountain because that’s where the immortals all gather. Also, the city shown is the Foot Clan. They worship the Spirit of the Day, aka Dellta. Although they get a few things wrong about her. Like how they think that Dellta and Casey are the “Lovers of the Sky”. Casey is worshipped by the Hamato clan, which is in the other side of the mountain. Their village is much smaller and poorer than the Foot, but they know more about the spirits and have connections with a few of them. The Hamato Clan mains are The turtles(but in older form, around 20-23), Splinter(the elder/leader of the village and the most connected with the spirits), usagi(because I can), and april(one of the few humans in the hamato village), and Junior(my version Casey Jones in the au. i just called him Junior since two Caseys would be confusing. also one of the few humans in the hamato village.). The hamato clan is also the only village that is home to mostly yokai and a few humans, while the foot only consist of humans. Also in this Au the turtles aren’t the sons of splinter, just his pupils. They are also all yokai, including splinter. The hamato clan mostly gives blood sacrifices of normal animals and sometimes bowls of blood from people cutting their hands and dropping some of their blood into the bowl since the Night Spirit is supposed to be closely connected to death. Although they also have plenty of shrines with statues and a TON of charms. Charms are a very big thing for the hamato, and they are supposed to hold prayers. Casey is technically supposed to collect the charms at the end of the week during the night and turn the prayers into stars for the people who made them, but he doesn’t like going so close to the village. Also because when he first went down there he found that they had left a dead sheep for him and he hated it. So, for fear he might find more dead things, he didn’t go back there again. Sometimes he will find small charms hung up all over trees that have mushrooms on them and he absolutely loves them. Although he’ll never admit it and he leaves the charms there. Because of this, the hamato people have begun to lose faith in splinter because he is the one constantly telling them to believe in the Night Spirit. Even the turtles have started questioning the spirits, especially donnie who was already skeptical in the first place. not mikey though. he still believes just as much as Splinter. The foot clan, however, all are VERY serious about their faith in the spirits. they have a huge temple dedicated purely for the Day Spirit, and also worship some other spirits too. even the Night Spirit. although Casey doesn't like them either since they also give blood sacrifices, with no charms too! Dellta, on the other hand, loves to go down and see the humans in the Foot. She'd always been fond of sparring, so when she first saw that they Foot were very centered around fighting she was ecstatic and loved watching them train in the grounds in the center of the city. although she had to stay hidden the whole time since she was only supposed to show herself to the people on special events. also, the only time she went to the Hamato clan was during the total solar eclipse since that's when the twins are supposed to go to their opposite villages and use magic to put their symbol on the banners of their opposite representation(sun on the moon banner, moon on the sun banner for example).

anyways, I hope you like this! if you can't tell, this will be mostly centered around the Hamato Clan and Casey. i hope to be able to make more art of this cause it is SO. MUCH. FUN. to draw these guys and build more of the story. i've already got so many ideas for angst floating around in my head, as well as ideas for when Mikey meets Casey for the first time.

also this is very much inspired by Quilt Au by @cokoweee :)

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artbyfuji · 1 year

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hi i'm 25 today 🥳🎂

#my art #yay yippee my yearly self portrait :^)#for timezone purposes yes my bday is april 1st #don't ask me about todays roobie ep. lets just say i'm glad they didn't show the love of my crazy ass insane life #do NOT wanna juggle a fictional woman freak out and birthday stuff today lmao *cries*

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misspickman · 2 months

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My unpopular bg3 opinion is they tried way too hard to make some of these characters mean and flippant which is meant to make the player more interested in them and clearly this has worked on many (good for you !) but personally i could not care less. If 80% of what a character has to say to me is bitchy i will simply leave them at camp for most of the game

#Is this a skill issue of mine yeah maybe. I just find it annoying #At best and off-putting at worst like is there no better way to show that shadowheart is going through stuff/have her be mean that isnt #Her getting pissy that you have respect for a bunch of dead slaves #That was wild. I didnt ask her either she just had the need to let me know she thinks these slaves aint shit bc they didnt fight back #Thanks larian!#Wild take maybe idk but i dont think that makes her interesting i think it makes her off-putting. In this case #I generally like shadowheart this just sure is a thing to have her say. And not give the player an option to respond in any way #Ill get over this single line but im mad now. This isn't the only instance of this #I guess both larian and bioware think that characters thinking slavery is kinda ok is not a deal breaker #Txt #I know that these characters soften during the game. I have played a fair amount of it. I did shadowhearts quest i know whats up. Still #In both her and astarions case i think theyre written to have some wild takes on whats Ok to do that get kinda swept under the rug #if you manage to shove them in a Good direction. But u dont. Actively see them grapple with any of it #They just suddenly go wow im better now. Yay. I suddenly dont want to enslave other people for my power (in astarions case)#Like this switch flipped bc of my one roll? Idk. Im not super convinced #I know this is how the game works. I just think it could have been written better

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alien-from-planet-zog · 4 months

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KILLUA TIME!

#hxh #hxh killua #killua #hxh fanart #my art #yay it’s the boy #I love giving characters freaky cat eyes #don’t ask me what the stuff by his eyes is. scars? idk #just thought it looked cool #next up…either gon or alluka

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ssreeder · 2 months

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Hey!! I just wanted to say thanks for all your hard work <3<3

I had been a little down when it came to creating more content or being involved in Zukka side of the fandom but seeing your update reminded me to just have fun. And okay this is going to sound bad but I swear I mean this as a compliment; I thought I was wasting my time working for months and years on the stuff I made, but then I realized your fic series brings me so much joy and I'd never, ever judge you for the amount of effort you put into your writing. Seeing it's actually inspiring, to see that someone holds that much passion and creativity and you are sharing it all for FREE. That a person could take all this time to intricately weave together a story, create memorable OCs, breathe new life and make the ATLA world so much bigger than it ever was in canon.

So thanks for accidentally giving me a kick in the butt to stop being judgy about my own work and making me realize you and every fan creator is AWESOME.

I hope you have a wonderful day, your writing is a blessing.

awwww I wanted to say thank you for sending me this ask! I know it’s not easy to put yourself out there, even on anon, so I think it’s cool you felt confident enough to come here and tell me about how you’re feeling.

I don;t think what you’re saying is bad at all haha, because honestly, I feel the same way. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wondered why the fuck am I still doing this? What’s the point? Do people even still care? What if it’s not good enough? What if people discover I have no fucking idea what I’m doing? Why am i spending so much of my time and effort doing this?? I mean… the self doubt is super real, and shiiiiiit let me discover one person that feeds into my self doubt and I’m full on spiraling haha. (Be nice to creators damn it! we are doing our damn best lol)

I’m really glad you think my fic is awesome, and if it weren’t people like you reminding me, I probably would have given up a long time ago haha. I do give my fic a lot of effort, and I hope you continue to give your creations the same amount of love and effort! I’m sure you’re amazing, and seriously don’t give up! I care about your creations and if I don’t get to stop neither do you! WOHOOO!!

Thanks for the ask anon sorry it took me so long to answer

#I am the kind of person who is like AWWWW NO ASKS…#then I get an ask and I’m like YAY ASK!!!#& then I;m like OH NO HOW DO I ANSWER THIS ASK!?!?!?#but then if I don’t get an ask in a while I assume everyone hates me and then the cycle starts over again when I get another ask #but seriously anon DON’T STOP CREATING!!!!!#I wish the voices in our head weren’t constantly trying to discredit us #I also think the pressure we put on ourselves to be good enough is fucking dumb #like who cares if people like reblog comment kudo all that stuff #but ugh we all care so much #I love that you see all my passion and creativity in LIAB because I do put a lot of effort into that stupid fic #and yeah it stresses me out but when I see that it brings people joy and its worth it #& its not even that it’s stressful to write #I fucking love writing it #but yeah don’t think you’re alone with the ‘what’s the point’ thoughts #I’m sure we’ve all been there #at least I know I have been there #and kind of still am in there hahaha #thanks for this ask anon I hope I didn’t ramble too much #I hope you show me when you create something new! I’d love to see it #LIAB #ask

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mushiewrites · 1 year

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George and Punz for 6?

from this prompt list!

yay hi Kasey! you didn't say a lee or ler, so I did lee!Punz / ler!George, I hope that's okay! 😇

prompt 6 - “are you…? oh my god. you are.”

“I see someone’s made themselves at home already,” The blonde tilted his head up to see George standing at the end of the couch with a smirk. He was on the other side of the armrest, where Punz had been resting his ankles with his legs crossed while he lounged and scrolled through emails. “What’s it been like, two hours since you got here?”

“Three, actually.” Punz replied, rolling his eyes with a scoff at the comments. He shook his head slightly, chuckling as he lifted his phone back up to continue scrolling. It was silent for a few seconds, and Punz relaxed back into the cushions, assuming George had walked away.

In actuality, George was still standing by the arm of the couch, looking Punz up and down to see if he could come up with a way to mess with him. His eyes landed on the socked feet that were a mere few inches away from his twitching hands, and he bit his lip to hold in the giggle that threatened to expose his plan. He had no idea if Punz was ticklish or not, but at the very least, it was guaranteed to surprise him.

The brunette watched him for a few more seconds before holding his two pointer fingers in front of him, slowly wiggling them as he moved them closer and closer to Punz’s feet. When George’s finger met the fabric of his sock, Punz jolted with a yelp, immediately bending his legs into his chest. He sat up to face George, who was staring at him with wide eyes and an excited grin on his face.

“Punz…”

“Don’t.” Punz wrapped his arms around his shins, pressing his palms flat over the tops of his feet as George slowly walked around to stand in front of the couch, blocking any chance of escape.

“Are you…” He paused as he watched the blush flood quickly into Punz’s cheeks, spreading down his neck and over his nose. “Oh my God. You are.”

Before Punz could protest, nails were suddenly skittering over his knees, tickling in circles and random patterns that had the blonde squealing with laughter.

“Nohoho! George! Geohohorge, wahahait!”

“For what? You’re anti-ticklish medicine to kick in or something? Just shut up, idiot.” George responded, voice dripping with sarcasm as his smile spread wider watching the boy in front of him squirm and throw his head back with a loud cackle.

“I’m- I’m nohohot an idiot!” Punz protested through his giggles, a tiny snort making itself known every so often when George would hit a particularly sensitive spot on the bottom of his kneecaps. “P-Plehehease George!”

“Just be lucky you weren’t wearing those jeans with all the holes.” George teased, switching back to the pointer finger technique as he continued to swirl little circles against Punz’s knees. He squeezed his eyes shut at the feeling, his laughter growing in volume. Punz couldn’t stop himself as his hands flew up to cover his knees, needing to get rid of the tickling feeling more than protecting a spot that was already targeted.

However, Punz quickly found out that George actually was not done targeting that spot, letting out a huge shriek when he felt a grip on his ankle. George held onto his left ankle, yanking it away from the rest of Punz’s body and holding it up high, causing him to fall back against the couch cushions with the position essentially keeping Punz from sitting back up.

“No! N-No way, George. Please!” Punz pleaded as George turned his head to the side, lifting his chin up to meet the blue eyes that were full of nothing but nervousness and giddiness. He smirked one last time at Punz, ignoring his pleas as he used his free hand to drag his fingers up the squirming boy’s foot.

“Awh, is little Punzy wunzy a bit too tickwish?” George teased in his signature overly British voice he used whenever he messes around with friends, always over exaggerating the accent and making his voice go high pitched. He used his pointer and middle finger to scratch up and down the arch of Punz’s foot, causing him to stomp his free foot against the couch, not knowing what to do with the feeling.

“NOHOHO! Oh FUHUCK, dohohn’t! Stohohop!”

“Don’t stop? Well, alright!” The elder didn’t give Punz a chance to respond before shoving his fingers under his toes, squeezing and scribbling under them while the blonde boy thrashed and pounded his fists into the couch. George smirked, hearing how loud Punz was laughing and also catching the little squeaks that he produced whenever he scratched a finger over the ball of Punz’s foot.

“NAHAHAHA I- I DIDIDN’T MEHEHEAN IT LIKE THAHAHAT!” Punz whined through his laughter, which was now borderline hysterical as George continued to tickle over the wiggling foot he had trapped in his grasp.

“Well, that’s what you said, so it looks like we’re gonna be here for a looooooong time, Punzy!” Punz groaned through his giggles at the nickname, bringing his hands up and twisting them into the neck of his hoodie, quickly lifting it to cover his reddened face.

When George eventually released his foot, Punz attempted to scramble off the couch, trying to escape before he could do anything, but was stopped when the brunette suddenly grabbed his right ankle, this time yanking him into a laying position as George held his ankle in a headlock.

“Where do you think you’re going, blondie? I never said I was done,” George smirked, watching Punz melt into the couch with a new round of laughter as he traced a finger up and down the sole of his foot. “And we’re not finished until I say we are.”

Punz’s eyes grew as wide as saucers, swallowing thickly as he felt goosebumps begin to rise on his skin. He shuddered through his panicked giggles, having a feeling that he definitely wouldn’t be shown an ounce of mercy any time soon.

#lee!punz #ler!george #kasey writes stuff #asks #YAY THANK YOU #this was so cute and fun to write ):#i love lee punz so much hes so giggly and adorable #blondie will always be punz for me #i also had to throw in georges overly british whiney voice in there too #soz #i literally just went under 1k words #998 to be exact #anyways #hope you enjoy!!! :3 #mushie ficlets #mcyt tickle #my stuff

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ask-bruno-and-marias-prerot · 23 days

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wait, what do you sell again? i gorgor.

-"oh- wait "gorgor".? what does that mean?.. wait are you trying to saying forgot?? whatever..."

-"*clears throat*"

-"we uhm, sell all kinds of italian dishes here, it is an italian restaurant after all. but our best selling item is pizza unfotunately"

*maria looks at him, seeming surprised and midly annoyed he actually answered that*

-"oh so you're just gonna act like nothing happened"

-"yeah! leave it be, if it keeps bothering us with vague threats we'll just call an exorcist or something"

-"... you know what? sure, i'll just shut up from now"

-"wait that's not what- ugh, alright fine, do whatever"

#story posts #ask blog #note from the mun: [yay answered #sibling bickering my beloved #i should defenetly be asleep. but i'll answer the other ask in the inbox and then i'll go Perish/j #jgjbjvh you guys don't know how cringe i felt when doing the ** part. but like i have a vision for this scene and i need ya'll to see it too #btw fluffy you don't even know how the word gorgor has ruined me. its the only thing i say when i forgot smt now. thank you #ok i need to answer other stuff now]

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ahaura · 5 months

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it has been a long day but. finally home 🧎‍♀️

#hvaña #i am being put on new meds for thyroid (yay?) and being referred to a psychologist (reaction pending. much trepidation)#because of some stuff i said in the follow up. which i dont know if i was clear about getting my point across but w/e i guess #minor mother daughter communication mishap/event happened and i DID cry but we're fine now #also had to visit my grandma which went ok. she was not racist to my mom this time so i consider that a win #her nurse told me she expects me to come around more now that i can drive (sigh)#but the craziest part is that i was besties with her niece in grade school and we haven't talked in years #and she apparently asked how i was doing. which makes me feel a little o.o but its not bad yk #idk how to explain to people my current position in life because that requires Backstory but i skirted it. this time.#ANYWAY. we are home now. yippee!

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youremyonlyhope · 1 year

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In Defense of Tolya/Inej

(A long rambling essay exploring asexuality, "shipping wars," and the effect that constant cancellations has had on fandom. 4600 words. I'm not even sorry that it's long. There's a tldr at the end.)

Let's start this off by saying I am asexual. Or demisexual... greysexual... aceflux... the point is I am on the asexual spectrum. I don't know where precisely. I don't personally think it really matters for me to specifically define it. I am somewhere over there. I also consider myself to be somewhere on the aromantic spectrum (for that one I'm 90% sure I lean toward greyromantic).

All of this is to say: asexuality and aromanticism are both spectrums. They are umbrella terms. There are subgroups within them to help describe the range of the spectrum, but if people want to just use asexual or aromantic to describe themselves then they can. Where I fall is different from where someone else falls, and that's different from where another person falls, and that's probably different from the person reading this if you are ace and/or aro too. And it's different for Tolya. There isn't one aroace experience and there isn't one type of aroace representation.

A little more about me. I am also mixed race. More specifically Black and white like Jesper, but mixed people of all races know the shared experiences of feeling like we're between two worlds. It's not as obvious in the show (I can't remember if it's even mentioned but I can see that some fans don't seem to know), but in in the books Tamar and Tolya are half-Shu and half-Ravkan. Also, I am a twin. I am a girl with a boy twin. My twin brother is a foot taller than me. So, Tamar and Tolya's existence in the Grishaverse speak to MY SOUL. Tamar, Tolya, and Jesper make me feel like so many parts of myself are represented on these pages.

Moving on from my background. Just another reminder that ace is a spectrum. Aro is a spectrum. Life. Is. A. Spectrum.

Onto the actual topic: Tolya. In the books, Tolya doesn't have any love interests. He also notably says "I have my faith, my books. I've never wanted more," in Rule of Wolves. This leads many fans to headcanon him as ace, aro, or aroace. I headcanon him as aroace too. I loved that one almost throwaway line and it made me feel even more connected to Tolya. I recently reread the Shadow and Bone trilogy and it renewed my love for Tolya. The perfect casting of Lewis Tan also reignited my excitement for seeing this character that I adore appear onscreen.

It seems, from the scene of Tolya helping Inej onto the boat, that the show will explore the possibility of Tolya and Inej being together. THIS IS OK. This is ok specifically because THE STORY IS NOT OVER.

I find that when I am worried about something, going over worst case scenarios and best case scenarios can help me calm down. Let's list a few possibilities of where this will lead:

Tolya and Inej fall in love. Inej forgets Kaz exists. Tolya's possible aroace-ness is never acknowledged. They spend all their time kissing and having sex, never again hunting slavers or reciting poetry ever. If Inej and Kaz meet again, she'll break his heart because they'll never get together. Kaz dies alone. Tolya and Inej then have 20 kids.

Tolya develops (or has already developed) a crush on Inej. It's understandable, she helped save his life and they fought well together against Ohval. Tolya is a very outwardly affectionate person: he's open about his feelings (hence the constant poetry recitation), he loves to care for the people around him (sharing food with multiple characters, helping Jesper with Wylan), he values his blade (his hallucination nightmare is Tamar dying on his blade, he doesn't notice people ducking out of the way of his handle), and he is incredibly spiritual (praying in Shu-Han, but many more examples in the books, the show has barely touched the surface of his spirituality). He is nearly the polar opposite of Kaz, and Inej has said that Kaz cannot give her what she wants, so that probably draws Inej towards Tolya. They get closer after spending time at sea, and they start a relationship. They stay together through the end of the show. Kaz either stays alone or finds someone else. Tolya's aroace-ness is never acknowledged.

Everything from #2, except they don't stay together through the end of the show. Inej realizes that despite Tolya being able to give her what she thinks Kaz can't, she still wants Kaz. And Kaz, now having been away from Inej for a period of time and possibly working through some of his touch aversion and other anxieties, wants to try to meet Inej somewhere in the middle after knowing with it's like to almost lose her to someone else. She accepts Kaz, leaves Tolya, and Tolya is fine with it (because I can't imagine Tolya ever holding a grudge for that). Tolya's aroace-ness isn't never acknowledged, but is probably somewhat implied (something along the lines of telling Inej the "faith and books" line to reassure her).

Everything from #2, but this time Tolya is the one who realizes that this might not be what he wants. Maybe he realizes that he has romantic feelings for Inej but not sexual. Maybe he realizes that he has sexual feelings for Inej but not romantic. Maybe he realizes his feelings for Inej are purely platonic and the intensity comes from his gratitude for saving him. Or maybe the intensity comes from them connecting through their spirituality. This could either lead to Inej feeling sad and rejected and turning to Kaz for some comfort, OR she just agrees that the feelings aren't the same as what she had for Kaz. Kaz has now worked through some of his trauma. So they end the relationship, Toya is happy with his faith and books, and Inej reconnects with Kaz romantically.

The look that Tolya gave Inej wasn't from some sort of romantic interest, but instead intrigue at the chance of getting to know her better. They become best friends with their bond starting from their mutual love for blades and their spirituality. They become the blade fighting duo we never knew we needed. The show never mentions his sexuality, he just stays single.

Same as #5, but they also Tolya say the "faith and books" line and confirm he's aroace.

The show sees the negative response from some fans and does a complete 180, never addressing the possibility Tolya and Inej again. I do not want this to happen. Not because I like Tolnej, but because I hate that fan response and pandering has become a thing in the current age of social media and letting fans influence media. It completely ruined the Rise of Skywalker. I fully believe it's influenced RTD's Doctor Who (I can go more in depth on that another time). Looking at these examples, I would rather the Shadow and Bone writers continue with whatever storyline they already have planned rather than shift to appease some of the fans, even if that planned storyline isn't something I will like. People need to remember that the fans who care enough to speak on social media, both positively and negatively, only make up a small percentage compared to the entire viewership. So I definitely do not want them to take fan response into account when planning the show. Leigh is an executive producer, so I trust she wouldn't let them explore something with her characters and her world that she wouldn't mind seeing herself.

Kaz, in my headcanon, also falls somewhere on the asexual spectrum. Whether it's because of his touch aversion or if that's just a part of it, I do think he's somewhat asexual. While most of us are ace just because we're ace, there are some people who are ace due to past trauma and I've imagined Kaz falls in that category. To me, subtly in the books but definitely in the show, Inej desires a sexual relationship and she's well aware that Kaz doesn't want that. Her hallucination, which I see so many Kanej fans gif'ing and fangiring over, would never happen at this point in Kaz's life. Inej realizes it in the moment, and that's how she knows it isn't real. Tolya is literally using his Heartrender abilities to try to slow down the effects of the poison before succumbing to the horror of his hallucination, but it's Inej who snaps out of her hallucination first BECAUSE she knows what she's seeing is not possible. It's different from Jesper, who knows his hallucination isn't real since his mom is gone and yet still wants to stay in it, because Inej knows this could theoretically happen, but also knows that Kaz would never let it happen. She doesn't even let herself enjoy the hallucination the way Jesper did because it's something she doesn't think she can ever have with Kaz. There is a very real possibility that the show could ultimately decide (after some combination of the earlier scenarios in my list) that Tolnej doesn't work/doesn't happen AND then that Inej and Kaz will never have any sort of relationship either. They could all end up single or with other characters. Even at the end of Crooked Kingdom, the Kanej relationship is still somewhat ambiguous. They hold hands, she says she's not ready to give up on him, and he helped find her family, but they aren't explicitly in love. I wouldn't be surprised if the show goes the book route and leaves Kanej ambiguous yet hopeful at the end.

BONUS! Just because I think it'd be fun. Make Tolya canonically aromantic and just care deeply and platonically for Inej, but maybe he can still fulfill Inej's desire for a sexual relationship since he can be demi or greysexual or even asexual with a libido. Kaz may never fully stop being touch averse, which is perfectly fine, and he and Inej connect romantically with a fulfilling life of love. And then Kaz and Tolya get to bond deeply platonically over their mutual love for life's beauty (poetry and Inej). Make them some sort of triad that mixes and fulfills everyone's romantic, sexual, and platonic needs. It's a win-win-win for all three. It doesn't have to be a love triangle, Inej has two hands. Do I expect the show to go in this direction? No. Would I love to see it? Yes.

Obviously I'm exaggerating scenerio #1 on purpose. Because that exaggeration is what I imagine people to seem to think the show is leading to based on how intense their responses have been so far. I also tried to address some other things I've seen people freaking out about when making the scenarios, like how Kaz will react to Tolya or worrying if Tolya being aroace will ever be acknowledged in the show.

What do I think is most likely to happen? Honestly, scenario #3 or #4. Maybe #6. That's why I'm not freaking out. Yes I ship Kanej, yes I think Tolya is aroace, but I also like the idea of them exploring Tolnej and I think either #3 or #4 would be fun to see. While the show strays from the books in a lot of ways, I don't think they'll stray from the final relationships by the end of it.

At the end of Ruin and Rising, Mal and Alina get to leave, get married, and live an ordinary life full of ordinary things. I LOVE the ending (apparently that's another controversial opinion I have about the Grishaverse) but that didn't happen in the show. Yet. The show has separated Mal and Alina so that Mal can figure out who he is without his tracking and so they can find out if they love each other for each other, or if it was just destiny that pulls them together. This is not in the book at all. And yet I love it. It can lead to strengthening their relationship since I trust the show will still end eventually with them together, hopefully with their ordinary ending. I think the show is doing the same thing with Kanej. The "I'll have you without your armor or not at all" conversation actually came towards the end of the duology, but the show moved it much earlier. I like that they did because this gives them something to build up from. Another reason I like scenarios #3 and #4 is because they still give Kaz the opportunity take what Inej said to heart and try to live without his armor. At the end of Crooked Kingdom, he takes off his glove and holds Inej's hand, but he is not at that point in the show yet. He will be eventually. And knowing that Inej might move on with Tolya can give him more reason to work to get to that point. I don't think the show is telling us Kanej will never happen, I think the possibility of Tolnej is the same as them separating Malina. I believe they will all come back together.

And if any of my listed scenarios do happen: THAT DOESN'T NECESSARILY MEAN TOLYA'S SEXUALITY IS ERASED.

Sexuality in the Grishaverse is never defined. The fans can make inferences based on the relationships that Leigh gives her characters, but they don't define the characters' sexualities with labels in the books. This is because in the Grishaverse, labels as we know them don't seem to exist. You can kind of think of it in the way that we should treat LGBT+ people in history: we can give them labels of what we would consider them to be in our current era, but we'll never truly know what they would have labeled themselves because either they were closeted or there were just no labels for their sexualities at the time. And when they did have labels, they often called themselves things that many LGBT+ people would never use today. I look at the Grishaverse characters' sexualities in a similar way; they don't label themselves, and we can make assumptions based on the labels we would use, but they will never be explicitly canon unless Leigh puts it in the books.

For example, Hanne in Rule of Wolves (MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THIS PARAGRAPH) Leigh uses "she/her" pronouns for them up until the last part of the book, and then Leigh is careful to NEVER use any pronouns for Hanne again. The fandom assumes Hanne identifies as a transman from that point on or maybe nonbinary, but we really don't know for sure yet because it happened so late in the book. The Grishaverse wiki uses "they/them" pronouns for Hanne precisely because we don't know what they prefer. All we know is that they always felt uncomfortable when they presented as a girl, and they enjoyed Tailoring themself to be more masculine. Maybe in future books we will get a definite answer as to whether they are a transman or nonbinary, but for now we technically don't know. But out of respect, the fandom has agreed to use they/them for Hanne. (RULE OF WOLVES SPOILERS ARE DONE)

So, if Tolya does have a relationship with Inej at some point in the show, whether or not it lasts, it doesn't erase the possibility of Tolya being on the asexual and/or aromantic spectrums. The show and books are never going to give him a definitive label. He could be demisexual/romantic and figure out after forming a bond with Inej that he has sexual or romantic feelings for her. Or he could be greysexual/romantic, which has a purposefully wide definition (rare specific circumstance that he desires having a relationship, weak attraction or difficulty telling it apart from platonic feelings, etc), and his experiences with Inej could fall into one of those categories. In these cases, we'd probably get a scene where he'd say something like "I've always thought I only needed my books and faith, but after getting to know you, Inej, I have never felt this way before and I don't think I'll ever feel this way again." This would still be representation for people who fall along the middle of the aroace spectrum, but not those at the furthest edge. If the relationship doesn't last and through it he realizes that he's sure that these are things he's not interested in, then that represents every aroace person who had to go through that before coming to terms with their sexuality. It's not erasure. Maybe it doesn't specifically represent YOU if you consider yourself aroace, but it definitely represents SOMEONE who does (I'd find it very relatable).

And all of this goes back to something I mentioned at the start: the show is not DONE. If it gets renewed, which it likely will, then there is more to see. To me, the people I see freaking out about the possibility of Tolnej, whether it's because they ship Kanej and don't want a triangle or because they don't want Tolya's sexuality to be "erased," are reacting the way you'd usually see people react if the show ended at this point. But it probably will not. And then when I see posts from the people who are thinking ahead, they seem to only be considering scenario #1 and not realizing there are a multitude of directions for the show to go in. It's not worth freaking out over. Plus, there's always the saying "don't like don't read," so if you find you really are disliking even the possibility that any scenario I listed could come true, you can just not watch the show and pretend it doesn't exist. The books are never changing. Even if the show changes everything, even if they have Alina end up with Jesper or Wylan end up with Nadia or Zoya marry a volcra or any other ridiculous outcome that utterly changes the show's canon, the book's canon will never change. You can always turn to the books if things don't ultimately turn out in a way you want them to.

Also, why am I seeing people complain that fans are writing fanfiction already about Tolnej? Why are you complaining about what other fans are doing that has zero affect on you? Fanfiction is not just for the canon ships. It's not even just for shipping in general, but it's definitely not reserved to the ships that are canon. You can write fanfiction for any ship you want to. Shipping wars have never truly made sense to me, but maybe that's because my first big online fandom was Glee and the ships were constantly changing and switching around so there was no point in putting too much effort into arguing because it may all change in the next episode anyway. Yes, we had lots of ship wars, but when people shipped the most random "crackships" possible then the appropriate response for most people was "wow, they really ship that, weird" and then to move on. Let people write fanfics. That's why AO3 exists. You can just write whatever you like. And yes of course a new crop of fans hate AO3, which is a whole other issue I cannot wrap my head around, but the point is to just let people write the fanfic they want to write and make the fanart they want to. Someone has already made a Tolnej fanvid on YouTube? Wow that's incredible since they did it so quickly! Malina on the moon AU? Cool throw in some sun and moon jokes! Do you think that Wylan and Hershaw would be best friends? Go for it, they'll probably blow everything up! The Darkling and Mal and Alina incest AU fic? Not my cup of tea but you do you and I just won't read it. People will write what they want to, and they aren't hurting anyone in the process, so if you don't want to see it then don't read it.

I see people complaining that shipping wars will begin to start after this fandom had been so peaceful for years. Honestly, the only reason there weren't shipping wars before this was because Six of Crows didn't have enough characters and possible ships to have a war over. Mixing with Shadow and Bone earlier in the timeline has opened up the possibilities. You know how to prevent shipping wars? Just don't fight with people who ship the things that you don't ship. Don't engage. If you see a Tolnej fanfiction, don't tell the author "Ew I hate Tolnej. You shouldn't have written this." just don't read it. Or if you do read it and still don't like it, then move on. If someone who ships Tolnej comes on a Kanej post and starts saying Tolnej is better, or vice versa, you can press the block button. Or you can just not respond to them. A shipping war doesn't start if you don't fight in it. There can just be people who ship Tolnej, people who ship Kanej, people who ship all 3 of them together, and everyone can just choose what they want to interact with and scroll past what they don't.

When it comes to Avatar: The Last Airbender, I am a gigantic Zutara shipper, and the Zutara vs Kataang ship war was infamously a bad one, but I just try not to engage in it. I know my ship isn't canon. Sure, I'll complain that it's not canon, maybe say "Oh in this scene they were so in love" and think about what could have been, but then I just go read Zutara fanfics. If you don't want to see shipping wars, don't participate. Ignore it. Move on.

But you know what? I think I know what the ultimate source of this is, or at least one of the sources. I've been seeing similar uproars in the Stranger Things and Umbrella Academy fandoms this year. Both are fandoms that also tend to skew younger than myself. I think fans, especially younger fans, are now reacting in these intense ways as a defense mechanism because so many shows get cancelled early. They're preparing in advance for this to be the last of whatever media they love, they're preparing for this to be canon forever, and they aren't happy.

Using Stranger Things as my example, I saw it happen when people were mad that Will didn't come out as gay at the end of Season 4 and that Mike didn't fall in love with him. I get that you guys ship them, and I love Will and want him to be happy, but just because it didn't happen in Season 4 doesn't mean it's not going to happen. First of all, Will is a 14 year old kid in the 1986 from a small town in Indiana that can barely handle Dungeons and Dragons and he's already been bullied at school for possibly being gay, coming out is not as easy as it is today. Reagan only just acknowledged AIDS one year earlier. Even Robyn hasn't come out to anyone but Steve. If they had thrown in Will coming out amongst the chaos of Elle fighting Vecna and trying to save Max, I know people would complain that it got shoehorned in as an afterthought. And because it didn't happen at all, people are complaining about that too. I know people will always complain about something, but I'm sure that fewer fans would complain if they didn't have the fear of cancellation instilled in them. Sure, Stranger Things would never get cancelled before finishing the planned story, but these fans are just used to feeling that the end of each season of every show could possibly be The End, and then complain about the loose ends accordingly.

That's what I think I'm seeing from the people who are upset about the possibility of Tolya and Inej being together. The show will probably be renewed, but it's not guaranteed. If it were to end right now, then yeah, fans who only watch the show would assume Inej and Kaz will never be together, that Tolya is interested Inej, and they'd have no idea that he's implied to be aroace in the books. But here's the thing: if you read the books, you know none of this is true. In the books, Tolya is aroace representation. In the books, Kaz and Inej are implied to have a romantic future. Why does it matter to you and your life if some people who watch the show don't know about the parts of the books that haven't happened yet? The fans who are mad about this change are all book fans because we're the ones who know it's a change. If we don't like the change, we can always choose to only acknowledge the books. The books can't be cancelled. The books are not going to change. Even if the show goes in directions you don't like, you can always take solace in the books.

Also, I see way too many people complaining about Tolya and Inej who have only read SoC/CK but not any of the books that Tolya actually appears in.

I'm nearly done. I wanted to address the aroace fans who are sad because they saw themselves in Tolya and now feel he doesn't represent them. I'm sorry that a character you connected to doesn't touch you the same way in the show as they did in the book. But you can't say Tolya isn't aroace representation in the show, at least not yet. At this point, he doesn't represent YOU and you definitely deserve representation, but he does represent SOMEONE. And hopefully he will continue to represent someone. So many aroace people had relationships with people they cared about and thought they felt romantic or sexual love for, before they eventually realized they were aroace. If this ends up as Tolya's story, then that rings true to SO MANY people. As I keep repeating, the show is not over, this could be leading to one of the scenarios where Tolya figures out that he is aroace through pursuing a relationship with Inej. He could already be demi or grey and it just hasn't come up in the show yet, but meeting Inej is one of the few times in his life that he does feel romantic and/or sexual attraction. Or, the look he gave her was just platonic and he's excited to have her aboard the Volkvolny.

We don't know for sure. It's better to just let the show's story unfold and remember that you will always have the books you love, rather than waste energy worrying about where the show is heading.

So yeah. I love Tolya. I love the idea of Tolnej. I love any plot point that can put more Tolya on my screen. I am greyromantic and demi/grey/flux/asexual/whatever and I personally like where they're taking his character and I want to see what it leads to. I hope it ultimately leads to him staying on the asexual and aromantic spectrums, but we don't know for sure right now. We just need to wait and see.

Also, don't tag any hate posts for the ship in the Tolya Yul-Bataar, Tolnej, Tolya x Inej, and Inej x Tolya tags. That's just fandom etiquette 101.

.......................

tl;dr:

1) The show isn't done yet and we don't know where it's heading. 2) The show can be heading in a bunch of different directions, including keeping Tolya as aroace and having Kanej be canon. 3) Asexuality and aromanticism are spectrums and umbrella terms, so Tolya could be with Inej and still be considered aroace. 4) This isn't erasing aroace representation because there will still be aroace people who will feel represented by him. 5) The books are not going away so if worst comes to worst, he'll still always be aroace representation in the books.

#tolya yul bataar #grishaverse #shadow and bone #inej ghafa #sab spoilers #shadow and bone spoilers #anyway if you're gonna try to argue with me then at least read the whole thing first #i try to anticipate things people will ask about or argue against when i write stuff like this. so at least read it if you wanna argue.#since i likely tried to touch on whatever point you wanted to make. if not then cool.#if you don't wanna read the whole thing and if even the tldr is too long for you then just don't try to argue #also my anon is off. it hasn't been turned on in years. so. yay.#my replies are also off unless i follow you or you've followed me for a week. but not because of this post.#it's because i had a racist call me the N-word over House of the Dragon. so. i got bigger things to worry about.#oh especially listen to that last point and don't tag any hate. notice i didn't tag this as kanej.#this isn't even kanej hate. this isn't remotely kanej hate. you can see from my SoC duology review post #i ship kanej. i like kanej. but i still didn't tag it. this will show up in searches because i said kanej throughout.#but it's not going to show up in the kanej tag. because i just don't want to open that can of worms.#anyway i spent like... 7 total hours writing this over the course of this afternoon and evening #when i get in the zone i get in the zone

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