#without sounding like a total jackass

[unbidden-yidden]

You know when this all started coming to light, I fully expected that leftists would try to downplay the horrific violence by acknowledging that it was "bad and our hearts go out to the victims and their families, but......" or by making a sharp distinction between civilians and soldiers (or even like, minors and adults), but the thing that's fucked me up is that nope! We sailed right past any attempt to even pretend at human decency and cut straight to "they deserved it."

Even the kids?? Yep, even the kids.

Like Jesus H. Christ y'all.

I'm used to people feeling like they need to at least gesture vaguely in the direction of giving a shit about Jewish lives and not justifying actual terror tactics and war crimes on civilians (you'd think for consistency's sake they might care about looking like they care for the credibility but..) even if we both know they really don't actually care about antisemitism in a meaningful way. We both know that they won't be there when it actually counts, and they sure as fuck aren't going to interrogate their own personal or group's antisemitism. But usually there's a fig leaf. There's at least a baseline assumption that they should care about antisemitism and Jewish people staying alive, even if they don't actually, so they'll say the minimum amount of correct sounding words and then quickly skedaddle onto whatever it is they actually care about.

And like, is that good? No, it's not. It's not good enough. I'm sick and fucking tired of people doing juuuuuust enough to pretend to care without ever addressing the real underlying issues.

But this? This totally floored me. This drops that baseline assumption that antisemitism and murdered Jews is a bad thing entirely and blatantly sides with literal actual terrorists committing unspeakable horrors while holding it up as "liberation."

And what's worse? Most of those were the further out fringe types (although there were a horrifying amount more than I expected) right? Most everyone else wasn't spouting off about how happy they were that vive la révolucion, right? You know what was really deafening?

The silence from everyone else.

Literally everyone except for maybe one or two gentiles I remember seeing kept their mouths shut. Everyone else? Not a goddamn word about how fucked up it was that people were crowing over our people's fresh corpses. The bodies hadn't even cooled yet and we had jackasses on here publicly celebrating with memes and gore videos, and not a word from 99.9% of you.

The people who did speak up? You have no idea how much it means, and I'm grateful. Truly.

Everyone else who was too gutless, spineless, or oblivious to realize how critical a moment this was for support and/or was more interested in protecting your image or whatever?

Let's just say: duly noted.

I may continue to work alongside you (what choice do I have?) but the trust is gone.

We're clearly on our own, with rare exception.

(This is a vent post I will not be adding any caveats to it and I will be blocking anyone who tries to be an asshole. I will lock reblogs if there's any discourse. Our lives are not up for debate you sick fucks.)

#gearing up for the ''k*ke kys'' asks in my inbox #but like #I already got some wild shit when posting my actual measured and serious posts instead of just venting #so idgaf #do your worst so I can report it and be done lmao

[brbsoulnomming]

Tell Me Sweet Little Lies Part 3

Part 1 | Part 2 | AO3

----

Towards the end of the summer after his freshman year, he finds out that his soulmate must be a year younger than him, because he gets I'm not nervous about starting high school, and that - hmm. It takes Eddie a bit to figure out how to reassure him around that. High school sucks, and he's guessing it's probably going to suck for his soulmate as much as it does for Eddie. The only saving graces are that Eddie was actually able to get a DnD club started, and Kyle Housen - the absolute shithead who was the most popular boy in school, the king of all the jocks who sent his followers out like ringwraiths to torment anyone who was different - is graduated and gone.

Eddie actually is looking forward to being able to breathe easier without him around.

So that's what he tells his soulmate - find something you enjoy doing, stick with your friends, and remember if there's someone in the grades above you who's really annoying, they'll be gone before you are.

That means a lot to me shows up on his chest after that, and Eddie runs his fingers over it again and again, not thinking about who his soulmate was talking to or what they were lying about, just that Eddie means enough to them for them to make sure that appeared on his skin.

It gets him through the rest of summer and into the first few weeks of his sophomore year, until he realizes that while Kyle Housen may have graduated, some of his little sycophantic friends didn't, and a few of them are more than happy to take over the torment of the freaks.

It makes Eddie's blood boil.

"It makes absolute total fucking sense the way rich kids and jocks and all the society conforming jackasses just run this school, like little violent monarchs," he says to one of the members of Hellfire as he throws himself down onto their lunch table, purposefully making himself sound as sincere as possible so it'll get picked up as a lie. "I love this whole the king is graduated, long live the king shit they've got going on."

Eddie doesn't expect an immediate answer. He doesn't usually get one, especially when he springs stuff on his soulmate in the middle of the day. But he doesn't get one that night, or the next day, or the day after that.

And just.

What the fuck? Is his soulmate one of them? Eddie'd just assumed - a kid that had to lie about his injuries, parents never around, feeling lonely, cheating the system to talk to his soulmate before they even met - had to be a fellow freak, right?

Shit.

He thinks about saying I care that you're one of them, but he knows that isn't a lie, and it wouldn't appear on his soulmate's skin.

He doesn't say anything.

Eventually, I'm not sorry things are the way they are shows up, curled in tiny letters around Eddie's ankle, but it doesn’t make him feel better.

It makes him remember that his soulmate is talking to someone - or maybe multiple someones - when they do this, someone unaware that what he's saying are lies. The same thought that had made him feel special before now makes him think a little harder, makes him realize that his soulmate is friends with these people. These people who agree with the things that his soulmate is lying about, who think that his soulmate believes them - that's who he chooses to spend his time around?

Part of him knows it isn't fair. It's not his soulmate's fault that Eddie had built up this idea of him - a fellow outcast, maybe in a small town like this, going through the same things Eddie was, just waiting to graduate and leave it all behind, go somewhere bigger and louder and better.

But most of him is just too damn hurt. Most of him doesn't want a soulmate that says the kind of things his soulmate says, surrounded by people who think they aren't lies, and who love him for it.

Most of him can't stomach the thought that his soulmate is just like the people who have it so damn easy at school, and seem determined to make his life more miserable anyway.

The silence on his skin is as deafening as it is telling, and he starts to wonder if maybe his soulmate can't stomach the thought of it being someone like Eddie, either.

One night, so what if I don't think we should just wait until we meet our soulmates? appears on his side, and Eddie runs his fingers over and over and over it.

And says nothing.

"Haven't heard you talk about your soulmate in a while," Uncle Wayne says casually a week or so later.

Part of Eddie'd been expecting Uncle Wayne to bring it up somehow, but the other part was doing his best to ignore it entirely, leaving him entirely unprepared for what to say. He can't say that he doesn't want to talk to his soulmate any more because he found out they're probably some popular rich kid stomping around whatever school they're haunting - it's true, but it sounds stupid and petty.

He can't lie, either, though, because then it'll show up on his soulmate. So he says nothing, mulishly pushing his peas around his plate.

Uncle Wayne watches him. It's probably pretty easy to figure out that something went wrong with Eddie's hairbrained little scheme, so he isn't too surprised when his uncle hums softly.

"Some people are very different at thirty than they are at fifteen," he says, his gruff voice gentle. "Sometimes, teenagers are little jackasses with no impulse control."

Despite himself, Eddie huffs out a laugh. He considers that for a long moment, then reluctantly admits, "I guess that's probably why most people don't try to talk to their soulmate early." He smashes some peas with his fork. "….I guess it's probably not fair the other way, either. If you have this great idea of them way before you meet them, and they're really different."

Uncle Wayne gives another hum. "Sounds pretty wise, if you ask me."

"I didn't," Eddie points out, just to be contrary, but he eats the peas he'd been playing with, and he does feel a little better about all of it.

Time goes on.

He and his soulmate don't talk anymore, but that doesn't mean things don't occasionally appear. It's not often - which makes Eddie wonder if his soulmate just doesn't lie often, or if he's specifically avoiding lying as much as possible to avoid talking to Eddie - but it does happen.

Little things, mostly, lies about doing homework, about being sober, about not driving without a license. Teenage stuff, the same stuff Eddie lies about, and it lulls him into a sense of boring predictability. He perfects playing the guitar, he turns Hellfire into a sanctuary for those like him, he finds an alternative revenue source that gives him even more of an advantage over the shitty jocks than being scarier than them had, and he counts the days until he can get out.

Until the summer before his senior year.

I'm not in love with her, geez!

Eddie stares at it for longer than he should, the sting of tears biting at the corner of his eyes and feeling so goddamn angry about all of it. Not only is his soulmate some popular rich kid, but he's straight, in love with some girl, fuck.

Maybe Eddie isn't meant for a romantic soulmate. Maybe platonic is all he'll ever get, maybe someone like him doesn't -

Fuck this.

Fuck everything.

He throws himself into guitar playing, into making his next campaign for Hellfire bigger and better than anything he's ever done before.

Just one more year, and then he's gone.

In Eddie's senior year, Steve Harrington - Hawkins High's current reigning royalty - and his right hand man Tommy Hagan have some kind of falling out. Eddie honestly doesn't give a shit what or why. He keeps an eye on the situation only enough to know if they're gonna have some kind of civil war shit that could bleed shrapnel onto his flock. But Hagan doesn't seem to have the constitution to challenge for the throne - or maybe he lacks the numbers, considering Harrington doesn't seem to be hurting much as he swans around the school with Nancy Wheeler at his side - and whatever their mess is stays in a building tension amongst the popular crowd.

It's kind of nice, actually. There's less gossip about Hellfire for a little while, until the masses adjust to the new status quo. Hagan seems meaner, somehow, but he also seems less confident now that he's not at Harrington's side. It means his comments are more cruel, but there's less of them, so whatever, it balances out.

His soulmate tells more lies that year than Eddie's seen in such a short period of time, and something in his stomach twists tighter and tighter.

Yeah, of course I'm all right, why wouldn't I be?

It's nothing.

I'm sure they'll find her soon.

I'm fine.

I'm fine.

I'm fine.

Taglist: @vampireinthesun @koibug @estrellami-1 @mentalcyborg @allbimyself26 @questionablequeeries @the-s-is-silent @whimsicalwitchm @a-gae-af-racoon @tinyplanet95 @n0-1-important @velocitytimes2 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @newtstabber @jcmadgirl @roblingoblin285 @lexyvey @goodolefashionedloverboi @evix-syne666 @raisedbylibrarians @stxrcrossed186

-----

Part 4

#steddie #Steddie fiction #Eddie Munson #Steve Harrington #wayne munson #soulmate au #light angst

[kremlin]

i figure most human behaviour that, not only doesn’t occur in other animals but has zero connection to animal behavior is basically distantly rooted in the known fear of inevitable death. let me be clear. cats and shit don’t know they’re gonna die. we do. we have thoughts. we know it’s coming. we think we’re gonna be rich, bullshit like that, most humans believe in magic and most humans doubt that math is a universal or consistent thing. total nonsense right. but everyone knows their ass is gonna die. before you write me off as some dumbass reciting basic 101 level university lectures just Trust Me I’m An Engineer. anyways. being human and dying are somewhat one in the same.

“if i do nonhuman things i can cheat the reaper.” short and sweet. if i can beat zelda faster than anyone i can outrun the reaper. and you know what, fuck it, i’m scared shitless of dying. it’s gonna hurt really bad no doubt. what if the brain destroyal process makes time slow down in my perception and it’s not just like five seconds of bleeding out or fire ant bites or however you go. Scary. so i’ll play along:

i am an average american man and i enjoy bad game runescape. it’s a computer game. MMO. kill monster get loot. sell what i don’t want to other players for gold. spamming chat with “SELLING BOWSTRINGS 200gp” for an hour “sucks” so the devs add a grand exchange where you can post buy/sell orders for a given item+price to maximize gameplay efficiency and minimize social interaction.

like any other MMO you can pay some sketchy website real money for ingame gold farmer by chinese gold farmers. totally against the rules. remember this

so the first thing that comes to any male aged 23-27 mind is “buy low sell high” basic bitch shit. no good. there’s a 5% tax that’ll wipe out your profit margin intended to eliminate this behavior (you’re supposed to friggen kill monsters). but everyone thinks they’re a genius and can beat the system and that there is a secret george soros style illuminati group that is holding the secrets, blah blah blah, whatever, and this comes as a coping mechanism after losing your shirt after trying to beat the market (success rate of 0%).

here is where people mostly quit thinking: if you do the math, which takes about ten minutes and can be done on one side of a sheet of paper with the most basic calculator, it’s easy to figure out that the amount of gold you’d need to play dirty (buy out all the available Feathers or Fire Runes or whatever) in order to corner the market would be so high that there is no possible way for a character to hold that much without having spent IRL money for gold. you’d get autobanned.

SO..finally, go on the ol’ www.reddit.com, and make a really really professional-to-professional sounding post advertising a “service”. Saturate the fuck out of it with dense but very real financial jargon. the “service” (which needs to be obscured enough with plausible and relevant language) is a hedging service aimed at make-believe market players who are buying and selling such huge amounts of items and gold (usually in anticipation of a game update that will speculatively introduce a sudden, dramatic, and capitalizable price change for some item). you need it to be as alien-sounding and foreign as possible but with enough believability and clarity that a handful of reddit jackasses will figure out what the fuck your post is about. whenever pressed further, act totally puzzled and make it very clear that this is not a service relevant to “individual entertainment-motivated” players or some shit. no matter what amount of gold anyone quotes at you, just act puzzled and if that amount is 1/1000th the amount one of your “normal” clients deal with. you need to do all of this extremely artfully. and by “you”, i’ve been meaning to write “me”. really lay it on thick that whatever you’re “doing” is totally unavailable to them and that you want zero to do with them.

so now theyre still mostly totally confused but enough is made clear that their interest is piqued. got my hook in em. some guy will copy/paste wikipedia shit in an obnoxiously long and pseudointellectual, contemptible but characteristically reddit guy style what you’re “selling” actually is in the most exhausting, hand-holdingest way to his fellow reddit gamers. with complete tone of authority.

inevitably one of them will put on their sherlock holmes hat and go deep undercover, emailing me posing as an interested party. bingo. now i get to really lay on the WTF and go off the rails asking about vouchers from One Of The Big Seven, but oh no, you can’t get one of them to vouch for you, that’s fine, it makes sense, we’re the only firm that deals with unvouched, that’s our market, well, one of them at least. Just give me a rough rundown of your entry criteria, dwell time, risk tolerance, fuckin “Gamma Ratio”, you know, all the basic stuff, and i’ll have the team generate a .xlsx for you to plug your data into to get a rough feel for what the final contract might be like.

(lololol) But REMEMBER, that excel sheet is seeded, output is fuzzed and salted and if you share it or try and sell it to our competitors, it will be fuzzy enough to be worthless to them but obvious to us who leaked what. this is the only way we’re able to integrate unvouched clients without untenable premiums and while managing our risk levels

blah blah blah blah, i go on and on and on and the guy on the other end is developing a scab from constant head-scratching. and that’s about the maximum real-world harm i’m willing to inflict. i know this sounds like an elaborate as fuck confidence scam but it isn’t. that shit makes me sick. i’d literally slam my arms in a car door before taking a cent from all this. hell, i’ll go out of my way to guarantee i don’t even piss anyone off or offend them or anything.

your guess is as good as mine but i do stuff like this constantly for anything i know well enough and the example i gave above is just a pretty low quality one i made up on the spot. this is a public blog after all.

anyways, cheers, hoping this saves me from dying or whatever the hell i was talking about before that could have probably been cut out. Namaste. Mahala.

[harrywavycurly]

Hey Sarah I’m in a mood and I was wondering if you could break my heart (pls put it back together tho) with any of the Eddies or Joes

Hiii lovey!! I will gladly break your heart and I’m gonna be totally honest I had a whole moment where I went “what if…I don’t put it back together?” but don’t worry I will…eventually(I really will fix it I promise) 🙈 but I did this in a conversation formate because that’s how it flowed the best in my mind so I hope you enjoy💖

-I had to create a whole new Eddie for this because I simply couldn’t bring myself to break any of my precious babies hearts😂

A/N: This has a cliff hanger and I’m sorry I feel like it’s necessary and you’ll see why, don’t hate me✨

“You know staring at it won’t make it magically disappear right?…you’re gonna have to open it eventually.” “Gee thanks Steve…what would I do without your words of wisdom?” “Listen jackass sitting here on your front porch staring at a cardboard box isn’t exactly how I planned on spending my Friday night okay?” “Then why’d you come over?” “Because…you called and sounded all…upset…and you’re like one of my bestfriends so…here I am.” “Thanks…” “So…what’d you do?” “I fucked up.” “I mean yeah…that’s a little obvious…I mean what did you actually do to make her send all your stuff back in a box marked…the asshole’s stuff?” “We got into an argument and she walked out and I didn’t go after her.” “Wait..what?..what do you mean you didn’t go after her?” “I mean exactly what I said Steve…I said some shit…she said some shit and then she left and I just…let her….” “What was this argument about?” “She got a wedding invitation from some girl we went to high school with and it made her all…happy and hopeful for our future and..she started talking about us getting married and I just…I’m not ready for all that shit man I’m only twenty three I can’t be someone’s husband.” “Okay so you just tell her you’re not ready yet…you don’t just throw in the fucking towel Eddie.” “You didn’t see her face when she was talking about our lives together Steve…she’s ready for that like right now and I don’t…I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready.” “What exactly did you say to her?” “I just told her…if she’s looking for someone to marry she’s looking in the wrong place…and…and she just..called me a selfish asshole and left.” “Well she wasn’t wrong…and that’s when you just let her drive away?” “I didn’t even move from the couch…I sat there the rest of the night because I just assumed she’d come back after she calmed down a bit.” “You’re such an idiot man…but just tell me…is it the idea of being with her forever that you don’t think you’re ready for? Or is just being her husband you can’t wrap your head around?” “I love her…more than anyone and I know she’s it for me but I’m not husband material Steve and that’s not…fare to her.” “Oh fuck off with that…she clearly thinks your husband material or she wouldn’t bring it up so don’t go trying to say you did this as a favor to her okay? You did this because you’re scared.” “I’m not scared.” “Yes you fucking are Eddie…you’re terrified that someone else loves you so much that they literally want to be legally bound to you…that’s some heavy shit man so I get it but that’s why you made her run away…it has nothing to do with this lame ass excuse of you not being husband material.” “I just..I don’t want to fuck it up..I’ve seen enough horrible marriages I don’t need to be apart of one too.” “Sorry to break it to you man but…you kinda already did.” “Yeah…I did didn’t I? She couldn’t even write my name on the box…” “Oh asshole isn’t your first name? I’m shocked.” “Fuck off…” “Sorry…but you wanna go through it now or…wait?” “I don’t need to go through it…I know what’s in it.” “Oh really? What?” “A few mix cds I made her… a teddy bear from a claw machine at the arcade…some letters…a photo of us at the lake one summer and hopefully a few Metallica shirts.” “Letters?” “Yeah? We used to write each other all the time…it was like our way of expressing how we felt sometimes when we couldn’t really…get the words out…why are you looking at me like that?” “Do you want her back?” “What?” “Answer the question man.” “Yes…yes I want her back…” “Just checking…because…I may have an idea…” “Okay…I’m listening…”

#eddie munson imagine #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson au #eddie munson angst #Eddie Munson and Steve Harrington #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fanfiction #Eddie Munson #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things au #my little dungeon master baby #my little fluffy haired baby

[specialagentlokitty]

Neytiri x reader - learning about you

Could I please request an avatar imagine where the reader is part of the avatar programme, jakes sibling, and deaf, and when Neytiri saves them both, she is protective of the reader who has an interest in na’vi culture and the two share a sibling like bond? - Anon 💜

A/N: na’vi will be in italics and sign language will be in bold

You were mesmerised by everything on Pandora, you were captivated it by all. Never had you seen such beauty before in your life.

Following behind your older brother, you hand your hand on the back of his wheelchair as he led you down the hallways while you looked around, taking everything in.

You were taken to a lab, and Jake stopped making you stop and look down at him.

Can you find her?

Looking around, you nodded your head and pointed across the room, going over to look at your avatar.

She was stunning, deep blue skin, little white dots that could almost resemble fireworks, beautiful black hair and a thin long tail.

While you were admiring your own avatar, you weren’t aware of someone trying to talk to you, but Jake heard it and turned away from Grace who was explaining basic things to him.

“Uhm Norm? She can’t hear you.”

Norm stopped and stepped away from you, turning to your brother.

“Seriously?”

“Deaf since birth, hold on.”

Jake pulled a small ball from his pocket and threw it at you, hitting you in the back of the head making you frown as turned around.

You stuck your middle finger up at him, grabbing the ball you walked over and handed it back.

What the hell was that for?

Jake stuffed the ball in his pocket.

I’m going to introduce everyone.

And he did, he told you everyone’s names in sign, and you rolled your eyes at the names he had given them before pulled a whiteboard and pen from your bag.

You scribbled something on it and flipped it around.

‘Sorry, can you write down your names? Jackass here thought it would be funny to give you sign names instead.’

“Seriously?” Grace sighed to him.

She took the board from you writing down her name, Norm and Max did the same and you nodded, making a mental note of it before rubbing them out.

You looked back at the group and Grace motioned for the board so you handed it over to her, letting her write something down before handing it back.

‘Did you do the training programme?’

You nodded to her before rubbing out the sentence and wrote something else to show her.

‘I did, yes. Also I can lip read, I’ll just use this to reply.’

You looked at her for confirmation and when she had read it she nodded and you set it aside so you could watch her talk.

“They’ll be ready for you to trail run them tomorrow. For now try teach that moron some of what you know otherwise he’s going to be totally useless to us.”

You nodded and turned to Jake.

You’re useless.

He scoffed, flipping you off and you smirked down at him.

The rest of the day went without a hitch, you attended a meeting which you didn’t pay attention too, you tried teaching Jake some stuff he needed to know and he wasn’t paying attention.

When the next day came, you found yourself excited to join with your avatar, to become na’vi.

Waiting by your pod, you leant over it to look at Jake getting into his.

Do you think I’ll be able to hear?

Guess we’ll find out, if you can hear I can walk.

You grinned a little, both of you were beyond excited and you quickly climbed into your pod, watching Grace’s lips carefully as she spoke about what you needed to you.

You knew all of this, but getting told again was never a bad thing.

The pod closed and you closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you waited for the link to connect.

You weren’t sure if it took a long time or if it was quick, but soon enough you were opening your eyes with people staring down at you, but the whole room was quiet and you frowned a little.

Your ears flickered as you tried to pick up on the sound but you couldn’t, and you turned your head to the side to look at your brother who was sitting up to look at you.

“(Y/N)…?” He asked softly.

You shot up in surprise, ears flickering again, tail swishing an you heard some doctors cry out for you to stop and calm down.

“(Y/N)?” Jake grinned a little.

You smiled wildly, banging your hands against the table in excitement, you could hear him.

“You can hear! You can hear me!” He laughed.

Jake stood up on uneasy legs and you did the same, crushing him into a hug which he happily returned and despite the doctors wanting you both to lay down they couldn’t help but smile.

You pulled away and sat down like they wanted you too, but Jake had other plans, he ran away and Norm chased after him while you waited for the doctors to finish doing their checks.

One of them walked over handing you a tablet.

“Since you’ve been deaf since birth we aren’t sure if you can learn to talk, but in your avatar body you can head. We had our doubt about it to be honest. We’ve got you this so you can communicate.”

You smiled and nodded thanks, flicking your eyes to the door and she stood aside, letting you leave.

You were amazed by how it looked outside, all the sights but especially the sounds.

You focused on everything, trying to focus on one thing at a time but you couldn’t, and it began to get overwhelming, so to try and fix it you covered your ears but it did nothing.

“I had a feeling this would happen, here.”

Grace appeared and handed you something, gesturing for you to put it in your ears so you did, and it dimmed all the noise to just background noise.

“It’ll take a while for you to get used to hearing, but you can still sign, or talk through that whatever works best.”

You nodded your head and watched as Jake came running back over and you let out a silent laugh.

“This is amazing! Isn’t it amazing?!” Jake gushed.

You smiled at him and nodded your head.

I can’t believe you can hear stuff like this all the time!

He rolled his eyes at you.

“You can walk, I think it’s only fair.”

Rolling your eyes to him, you lightly punched his shoulder and he smiled a little, gesturing for you to follow him so you did.

You guys walked around for a bit and he talked nonstop, he was excited to be able to finally talk to you, for you to actually be able to hear his voice for the first time in your lives.

The next day came and you found yourself sitting in a helicopter, high above the ground, marvelling at all the sights.

Grace had made you special noise cancelling earplugs for when you were around heavy machinery, so when Jake wanted to talk to you he tapped your shoulder.

Are you going to be part of their research team too?

You shook your head.

No. I’m just here to observe everyone is following rules and guidelines.

He nodded his head and when you guys landed, you waited to be told you could take your earplugs out, and when you did you were smiling brightly.

“You really love the sounds Huh?” Norm smiled.

You nodded your head excitedly and while you watched then for a moment taking samples, hearing movement behind you, you turned your head to look.

“Come on.” Jake whispered.

Nodding, you followed along behind him, letting him lead the way.

You weren’t expecting to be confronted by a large creature, and you weren’t expecting Jake to scared it away, but when you heard the growl behind you you slowly turned and froze in place.

You didn’t even get chance to process what it was before you were being screamed at to go.

“Run!”

Jake took your hand and you were both running as far away as you could from the creature, and after what felt like years you managed to get away.

Looking around, you frowned a little when you couldn’t find your little group anymore and you turned to Jake.

Where are we?

He shook his head.

“I.. I don’t know, come on, we’ll be fine.” He smiled.

Jake took your arm and you both started to move, trying to find somewhere safe for the night as it was quickly growing dark and you knew they wouldn’t be able to find out after the sun sets.

While you searched your bag for the tablet, Jake used some stuff to make a torch in order for you both to see.

“Do you have it?”

You looked up at him and shook your head, gesturing to the bag which just held some research stuff.

I must have left it.

“Crap, okay, just stay behind me.”

You nodded and walked behind him, back against his as you both turned around, surrounded by viperwolfs.

“Get down!” Jake yelled.

You didn’t need to be told twice, you crouched and he used the flames to try and discourage the animals from getting any closer.

Hands covering your ears, you tried to block out all the sounds, the snarls, the yips and barks and jakes yelling.

Burying your face in your knees, you tried to tune it all out.

You had no idea what was going on, but your head was hurting, everything was so loud, so tiring and painful you wanted it all to stop.

When the animals started to cry out, you curled in on yourself even more, their cries piercing your ears, drilling straight into your brain and you needed it all to just stop.

You felt Jake behind you, his hands covering yours to help block out all of the sounds that were invading your ears.

Jake turned to the Na’vi who shot them, killed them to save you both and he sighed a little, giving her a small smile as he stood up and walked over.

She picked up the torch and Jake panicked.

“Hey wait! Don’t!”

She had already thrown it and he sighed, following her as she spoke in a different language to one of the creatures laying in the ground, stick clutched tightly in his hands.

He looked around amazed, and he looked over to you before making his way over.

“(Y/N), here.”

He crouched down, pulling the ear plugs from your bag, putting them in your ears.

Finally you looked up at him and he pulled you up, leading you over as you looked around at the glowing forest.

“Look I know you probably don’t understand this, but uh… thank you.”

He looked at her, crouching down, and you turned to watch what she was doing.

“Thank you.” Jake repeated.

You looked at him.

“That was pretty impressive.”

The woman looked at you both.

“We would’ve been screwed if you hadn’t come alone.” He laughed a little.

You placed a hand on his shoulder, gesturing to follow her. She was your best chance of survival.

“Hey wait a second. Hey where you going?” He asked.

You both followed followed her, and while Jake kept talking you looked at all the sights, but when she spun around and hit Jake with her bow you panicked.

“Damn!”

Looking down at Jake you carefully watched the woman.

She placed her bow at his chin and you gently pushed it away, making her step back as she spoke to him.

She flicked her eyes to you and then back to him.

You took the ears plugs out to listen.

“You like a baby, making noise. Don’t know what to do.”

He tried shushing her and you smacked the back of his head as he stood up.

He glared a little and turned to her to carry on their conversation.

He asked her why she saved the pair of you.

“You have a strong heart. No fear.” She said to him.

Then she pointed at you.

“This one has a pure soul, but a deep struggle.”

Then she turned back to him.

“But stupid! Ignorant like a child!”

Jake laughed, turning to you and you rolled your eyes, pushing him to follow her and you both jogged to keep up.

He kept trying to talk while running across the log, and nearly fell but she caught him, calling him a baby again making you smile.

She told you both to go back, and you watched as small white things fell from the sky and Jake hit one making her hiss.

He hit another and she grabbed his arms, speaking to herself as she watched them surround your and your older brother.

Finally she let you follow her you two were captured by others and led to a large tree which you watched in amazement, admiring everything.

Your ear plugs were still in, and while Jake spoke with them, Neytiri watched you closely.

You didn’t seem to be hearing anything, and as they asked what Jake did, they turned to you.

“You, what do you do?”

You didn’t reply and the leader growled a little and one of them went to grab you but Jake stopped them, placing his hand on his shoulder.

He gestured for you to take the ear plugs out and you did, turning to face them.

“What are you?”

You turned to Jake.

Tell them I am a doctor, a healer and a researcher.

“Shes a healer, and a researcher like Dr Augustine.”

“Why will she not speak?” A woman asked.

“She can’t. She was born deaf, she cannot hear so she never learned how to speak.” Jake replied.

Neytiri walked over and wiggled her fingers, so you handed the earplugs to her, letting her exam them before handing them to her parents.

“And these?” Her father asked.

“In this body (Y/N) can hear, but noise can be to much for her. These block out that noise.”

He handed them back to Neytiri who gave them back to you, and Jake nodded, telling you to put them back in so you did.

While they talked he signed everything to you both and eventually you were allowed to stay and learn with them, though you had to change.

Neytiri had instantly taken an interest in you, and the next day as you watched your brother try to learn how to ride a Direhorse she turned to you.

She did the same thing Jake did to tell you to remove the ear plugs so you did, and she pulled you away somewhere a bit quieter.

“You cannot talk, yes?” She asked.

You nodded your head.

“So how do you communicate with your people? Your brother?”

You waved your hands in the air and grabbed a small stick, writing in the dirt.

‘I can write, or sign.’

She took a few moments to read it.

“Sign? What is this?”

You looked around before gesturing for her to follow you which she did, you lead to her grab and picked up a rock, throwing it at his head as he wiped mud from his face.

“Seriously?” He asked you.

Walking over, he stood in front of you.

Can you translate?

“Yeah. Sure.”

Neytiri had her eyes glued to your hands as they moved, and she tried copying some of the movements, something both you and Jake noticed.

Smiling, you turned to Jake.

Do you think we can teach her?

Maybe. We can always try.

You nodded and pointed to her.

“It’s sign language, it’s how people who can’t hear or talk communicate. Do you want to learn?”

“Yes! Yes I do! I wish to be able to talk to you in your language.” She smiled at you.

So you taught her, and she was a quick learner, and now you didn’t have to worry about finding Jake, because she had caught on to most of it easily.

You had to change some things to help her, but it worked just the same.

Sitting by a stream with Neytiri, she was asking questions about you and practicing her sign.

“If you are healer, why not heal your ears?” She asked.

Turning to face her you sighed a little bit before replying.

I don’t have the money, that procedure is really expensive it cost a lot. I spent my whole life in silence, so I wasn’t that rushed to change it.

“Oh I see. Would you change it if you could?”

You thought for a moment.

Some days yes. Some days no. It’s nice not having to hear Jake complain.

She laughed loudly making you smile.

You tapped her shoulder, making her turn to you.

Can you tell me more about Eywa?

“You wish to learn more of our culture?”

She seemed shocked and you smiled and nodded your head.

Neytiri immediately grew excited and jumped up, whistling for her banshee and she helped you up, making sure you were safe.

She took to the air, and you looked around, eyes glued to the white tree as you approached it.

When you landed she took your hand and led you over, getting you to sit down with her as she started to explain Eywa, and their beliefs and culture to you.

And you happy sat there listened along while you admired the beautiful tree.

Neytiri smiled when she looked at you, ears flicking a little as she spoke, tilting your head every now and then.

She wondered if you would ever learn to talk, maybe that’s something she could ask Eywa to help with, to bring you your voice.

But she was happy talking to you in sign language, a few others of the tribe were learning from here so they could talk to you too.

Since Neytiri took you under her wing, adopted you as her own sister everyone wanted to know you, talk to you and learn about you.

Neytiri was going to make sure to teach you everything to keep yourself safe, things you could do without having to rely on your hearing in case you couldn’t use it

#avatar #avatar x reader #avatar x you #avatar imagine #Neytiri #neytiri x y/n #neytiri x you #neytiri x reader #Neytiri imagine

[knoxvillesjackass]

hello! I had an idea of No Nut November with Johnny x female reader. The jackass guys all dare each other to do it and the winner couple is who lasts the longest. When his girlfriend finds out, she keeps teasing him and it all ends in smut!! Love your stories!! ❤️

𝐧𝐨 𝐧𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 - 𝐣.𝐤

im so happy to finally see a smut request!! pls, send some more, because i want to get better at writing it! also, do you guys enjoy reading it or do you like fluff and/or angst better?

warnings! edging, oral sex dom!johnny x sub!reader? ( reader receiving and giving), dirty talk, very dirty hihi

words; 3.375

It was bizarre. Annoying, really. You’d given him every opportunity in the world to rail you, blow your back out and make you incapable of walking for the day…All of your attempts were shut down, which was new for you.

Usually, all you had to do was send the smallest signal to Johnny, and he would be ready at any time, but the past two weeks had been different.

He’d been avoiding you, it seemed. He only kissed you when he left for work, and he’d even slept on the couch for some nights.

You’d been left confused and a little hurt by it all. Had you done something wrong, or was he perhaps just not attracted to you anymore?

The thoughts killed you, but it killed him even more. If it hadn’t been for that stupid bet….

“A month without sex? You’ve gotta be shitting me,” Johnny shook his head as the room erupted in laughter, but he was totally serious.

He couldn’t believe that he was the only one objecting to this nonsense. The concept was idiotic and frankly childish.

Steve-O had been the one to bring it up during lunch break. Everyone had shrugged it off, but as the tension grew thicker throughout the day, everyone suddenly began to take it very seriously, Johnny included.

So, as stupid as he thought it was, Johnny was knee-deep in the ‘No Nut November’ phenomenon, even though he hated the idea.

You and Johnny had sex a lot. No shame in that. Just two adults, who loved each other very much. What Johnny did feel off about, was that all of his friends knew just how much sex you had. How? Well, at every given chance to escape the craziness of the crew, the two of you did. And you didn’t do it to have conversations and drink tea. No, you did it to fuck.

Johnny had been labelled as the guy to fail the quickest, and it didn’t sit right with him one bit.

Luckily for him, his self-control was a different ball game. He had more control than all of the jackass guys combined. If there was a will, there was a way, and Johnny never let himself down once he had a goal.

“Oh, y-you’re participating?” Steve-O asked Johnny, who shrugged and nodded. “Yeah,” he huffed, and the room once again erupted in laughter, this time, it sounded more ridiculing than anything.

“What?” He asked confused and scoffed as he stared back at his wide-eyed friends. “Dude, you’re not going to last for two days,” Pontius grinned, Johnny returning a simple growl. “Let’s just fucking see, shall we?”

-

“Hi, baby!”

You grinned excitedly as Johnny entered your shared apartment. You wrapped your arms around him tightly, furrowing your eyebrows at once when you didn’t feel him embracing you.

“Are you okay?” You asked and unwrapped your arms around his waist, looking up at him innocently. “Y-Yeah, I’m fine, Y/N, I’m just tired. Think I’m gonna go take a shower,” he commented, his eyes focused straight ahead and not down at you.

“Oh, okay. Well, I could join,” you smirked and winked at him, but he merely shook his head and smiled politely before disappearing to the bathroom.

Well, that sucked, you thought.

He was probably just tired. He’d been working long hours, and maybe all the man needed was some space.

You’d attempted to be the understanding girlfriend, even when you felt ignored by Johnny.

The first few days went by okay, although the hours seemed to get longer as the days went by. The week overall was manageable but when the second week struck, Johnny was beginning to struggle.

The day of your anniversary, you'd made everything really special for Johnny. Dressed up nice, cooked some good food, and made the bathtub the perfect place to end the night, together.

When he'd come home, he'd acted just as you'd feared.

Distant and seemingly blind to the effort you'd put into making your fourth anniversary a special one.

The dinner was awkward and you hated the tension. You broke the silence every minute, asking him questions to which he answered with simple and short sentences.

"I have a surprise for you," you smirked. Maybe what he needed was some extra spice, and that was what you were going to give him.

"A surprise?" He asked as he was washing the dishes. He jumped when he felt your arms snake around his waist. Johnny moved away and coughed. His boxers were starting to feel tight, uncomfortably tight.

You grabbed his hand and dragged him to the bathroom. You'd scattered rose petals on the floor and lit some candles. It was the most romantic bathroom you'd ever seen, but Johnny didn't seem to agree.

"O-Oh, Y/N," Johnny coughed nervously and slowly backed out of the bathroom.

"Did I do something wrong? Are you trying to punish me or something? Please, tell me what's going on!"

"No, Y/N-"

"Then why won't you FUCK ME?" You shouted and sniffled. Johnny's heart tore a bit. He wanted to tell you, he really did, but with the mood and how you were feeling, it didn't seem as if it would've been a massive help in his eyes.

The next days were rough. You were upset, understandably. Johnny continued his odd behaviour and you were just about done with it all.

“Just tell me now; when did you give in and how was it?”

Bam stood like a little child next to Johnny and giggled, but Johnny rolled his eyes underneath his sunglasses and sighed.

“I haven’t given in yet, and I’m not going to, so you might as well quit bothering me.”

Bam scoffed at the answer he got from Johnny, but he hadn’t expected much else, considering Johnny’s recent behaviour.

He was in a pissy mood. He was at conflict with himself at all times. The whole dare had transformed into something beyond his control. He was so competitive, sometimes it scared people.

Johnny sat down in the conference room, where the crew held their weekly meetings. He cursed to himself and looked around. Pontius, Steve-O and Jeff sat and looked at him with smug grins.

“How’re you holding up over there, Knoxville?” Jeff asked, to which he received a middle finger from Knoxville.

“It’s been a long time since I've seen Y/N around? When is she coming by again?" Pontius pouted. Just the thought of your name at this point, could get Johnny hot and bothered.

"I-She's not," Johnny mumbled and rubbed his sweaty forehead. Was it just him, or was it starting to get super hot?

"That's weird. I talked to her this morning. She said, she's dropping by to say hello," Jeff said and immediately, Johnny tensed up.

"What?" He asked. He hated to even think it, but you were the last person he needed to see now.

"Y/N!" Wee-man yelled as soon as he saw your figure in the doorway.

Johnny hid his face in his hands as soon as he heard your voice. He imagined you saying his name, moaning it, screaming it.

"Hi, guys," you smiled and entered the conference room, greeting all of the guys with a hug, moving your way around the table until you reached Johnny. "Hi, babe," you smiled and leaned down to plant a kiss on his lips, although he moved away almost immediately.

You scoffed and stood up. What had you expected? He'd only been treating you like that for the last two weeks.

"Well, I can see that I'm not wanted here," you mumbled but were quickly met with reassurance from everyone but Johnny.

"Why would you think that?" Jeff asked, "we love having you here, Y/N."

"You might, but I think Johnny feels a bit different," you hissed and glared at Johnny, who slapped his forehead.

Suddenly, Ehren began laughing hysterically, to everyone's surprise. "Wait, you haven't told her yet?" He grinned and the boys slowly caught on and joined Ehren's laughing fit.

Johnny was so not having it. His fists were curled and his jaw was clenched. And you, you were utterly confused as to what was going on.

"Told me what?"

You raised your eyebrow and looked down at Johnny, who refused eye contact at all costs, the guilt weighing him down like uranium.

"We dared each other do the no nut Novem-"

"Don't even finish that sentence," you said and cut Ehren off. You were quiet for a few moments, trying to assemble yourself before speaking up.

"You wanna explain yourself, asshole?" You spat and looked down at Johnny, who sighed and looked up at you.

"Y/N, I'm so so-"

"Do you guys know how long it's been since I've had sex with my boyfriend?" I asked into the room and the guys all chuckled.

Of course, they knew. They were a part of it too, after all.

"Two weeks!"

It didn't sound like a lot, but anyone who knew you and Johnny understood that this was totally out of the ordinary.

"You're telling me I have to wait two weeks before he can bang me? How many of you guys are still in this bullshit?" You asked loudly to which Pontius, Jeff, Ehren and Wee-Man's hands went up.

"Fuck this," you sighed. You knew just how competitive Johnny was. Nothing could get in his way. Literally nothing, but then again, if anyone had the slightest chance, it was most definitely you.

-

"Y/N?"

You sighed at the sound of Johnny's voice.

Your fingers were curled inside of yourself as you lay spread across the bed.

You continued, although the sound of Johnny's footsteps came closer and closer.

You closed your eyes and began rubbing your clit, letting out a quiet moan.

"Y/N-fuck," Johnny breathed out when he walked in on you pleasuring yourself. His cock was throbbing at the sight of your naked body, but he denied all of those feelings and shuffled out of the room. The sight had made him hard as a rock.

"Johnny!" You called out. An idea had popped into your head.

He opened the door and peeked in. Your legs were spread open and they were trembling with anticipation.

"Huh?" He asked you. His eyes were almost closed. He couldn't bare to see more.

"Look, I know you're not allowed to cum or whatever, but I'm horny and I need your help," you stated and Johnny's eyes opened wide. You might be on to something, he thought.

Pleasuring you always brought Johnny pleasure, he didn't even have to pull his dick out for this one.

He smiled and rushed over to you.

He wasted no time digging his two fingers into your cunt, plunging them in and out of your wet entrance. His head rested between your legs as his tongue made contact with your clit. You reached down and grabbed a handful of his hair. God, he loved it when you did that.

What he loved, even more, was the way his name sounded when you screamed it out of pure pleasure. "Fuck, Johnny!" You cried and grabbed his one hand that wasn't fucking your cunt and pulling it up to your breast, signalling for him to massage it, which he did, gladly.

Johnny smiled against your folds and licked them up and down, ever so often pinching your sensitive clit between his lips, which drove you crazy.

"I-I think I'm g-"

"Look at me, babydoll," he ordered and you followed, looking directly into his dark brown eyes. You couldn't contain the eye contact for long though, because your eyes rolled into the back of your head and you let out a loud cry as you reached your awaited orgasm.

You tugged at Johnny's hair and breathed in loudly, trying to gather yourself.

"J-Johnny, just fuck me already, please," you sobbed and looked at Johnny.

The offer was so tempting, but he just couldn't. He snapped out of his thoughts when he felt his jeans tightening to the point of it being uncomfortable.

"O-Oh, shi-" he hissed and suddenly flew away from his position. You looked him up and down, eyes landing on the massive boner, he had packed. You held back an evil laugh as Johnny stormed out of the room. "Where are you going?" You yelled as you stood up from the bed.

"I-I'm just gonna go for a drive!" he yelled back and slammed the door. He wasn't angry with you, and you knew that. He was angry with himself. This bet was starting to get really fucking old.

The next days were seriously awful for Johnny. After helping you out, he realised that it might've been a bad idea.

The only thing on his mind was the feeling of your pretty cunt against his fingers and the sound of your screams still rang in his ears every now and then.

And you'd, of course, been making his life a living hell. Walking around naked in the apartment or dressing up in your sexiest lingerie.

Johnny kept himself together, though, and you had to give him credit. He'd handled it all very well, better than you ever could.

(random a/n; this same-ish story, but where the reader is dared?)

The end of November was just around the corner, thankfully. Sure, Johnny's hands were equivalent to magic, but nothing beat the feeling of his cock ramming into you.

You couldn't wait, quite literally. Johnny was so much better at staying committed to a dare than you. You needed him. Like, really needed him.

"Johnnyyyy," you whined and threw yourself at him like a little toddler,

He wasn't as sensitive as before. It seemed that the roles had taken a 180 because you were hornier than ever.

Johnny was sitting with his computer when you suddenly planted yourself in his lap and hugged him tightly.

"What's going on?" He asked and rubbed your back.

"I want it so badly," you whispered and bit your lip. Johnny stiffened up and shifted uncomfortably around on the couch. "Three days to go, Y/N," he comforted you, but that wasn't good enough. "No, but like, now," you said and reached down to straddle his cock. He let out a yelp and lifted you from his lap to the seat beside him as he stood up and paced around.

He was frustrated. It was really not fun anymore. Actually, it never was.

Johnny hurried to his phone and put the phone to his ear.

"Chris, you tell me now and be honest; who's still a part of this November bullshit?" Johnny asked. You smiled to yourself and crossed your fingers.

No one, please say no one.

You couldn't quite hear the rest of the conversation. You didn't really care either, because when Johnny came out, he had darker eyes and a wicked smirk on his lips.

"Go to the bedroom and take your clothes off. I'll be up in two minutes."

You squealed with excitement and ran up the stairs faster than ever.

You stripped out of your clothes and threw them to the side, feeling a knot in your stomach, waiting to be untied.

Johnny entered the room. He'd taken his shirt off on the way up the stairs.

"Get on your knees," Johnny ordered and you did so immediately and without protest of any sort.

The room was pretty dark, but you could still see Johnny's crooked smirk.

He approached you, stopping when he stood right in front of your kneeled figure.

He brushed some hair out of your face and cupped your cheeks as you stared up at him, batting your eyelashes.

He gathered your hair into a ponytail at the back of your head and tied it with the hair tie he had around his wrist.

"Fuck, I've missed your mouth," he moaned and unbuttoned his pants, not even bothering to pull them all the way down. And you were just as desperate to please him again, so without waiting any longer, you took a hold of his rock-hard length and gave it a few pumps. Johnny threw his head back when you put just the tip into your mouth. Impatient and understandably needy, Johnny skipped your slow tempo and grabbed the back of your head, pushing his cock into your mouth fully.

After four years of dating Johnny, your gag reflex was pretty much non-existent.

He began gently thrusting himself into your mouth and then sped up until you eventually could feel his tip at the end of your throat.

You watched with tears in your ears as your boyfriend had lost himself in you, thrusting himself into your mouth again and again until he was a mumbling, moaning mess, cumming down your throat.

You swallowed and Johnny watched you in admiration as he offered you his hand to help you stand up.

Your lips crashed together for the first time in weeks, and you moaned into the kiss when you reached the bed. Johnny put a hand behind your head and the other one on your back, slowly lowering you on the bed as he hovered over you with a hungry, lust-filled gaze.

You were merely wearing his t-shirt and a pair of old shorts, which Johnny quickly tore away, your underwear following. He pulled the shirt from over your head and admired your naked body for a while, before snapping out of his trance to return to his duty.

He began placing kisses down your chest but you pulled him up when you saw where he was going. You grabbed his hand and forced it down to your dripping cunt. "I don't need anything, I just want you to fuck me," you nodded and Johnny smiled. Foreplay was always a big thing in your relationship. It was a way to ensure that both parts were 100% ready, but there was no doubt in your mind; you were ready.

"You're still on the pill despite this stupid bet, right?" He asked and you nodded. He knew how bad you were at forgetting it, and he often scolded you for it.

"Good girl," he whispered raspily. That made your heart melt.

His tip was at your entrance, and you wondered if the three weeks had changed something within you. Was it going to hurt after that long with no sex?

You shook every thought off when Johnny placed a kiss on your forehead and slowly pushed into you.

"Ah-!"

Johnny looked at you with wide eyes. You apologised quietly.

"It must be because it's been a while," you said and Johnny nodded, understanding what you were feeling.

He continued pushing his member into you and watched you closely as you clenched your eyes shut and dug your nails into his wide shoulders.

He rested for a while, waiting for your sign to move, and when that sign came, he began pumping in and out of you slowly but deeply.

You grasped onto him and pulled him as close as possible while also wrapping your legs around his waist. "F-Faster," you moaned with closed eyes and Johnny grunted as he sped up, fucking you at an impossibly fast pace.

Everything seemed to go dull for a short moment. Your pussy clenched and your belly contracted tightly when a wave of pleasure hit you like a thousand bricks.

"I-Oh, my God!"

Your nails dug deeply into Johnny's back and you scratched them up towards his neck, where they rested, fiddling with the ends of his brown hair.

"Look at me, baby," Johnny ordered and continued his thrusts. You had to collect yourself before even listening to his orders, but Johnny was impatient and close to an orgasm, so he didn't have much time.

"Y/N, I said look at me," he repeated. The tone made you look at him immediately and you bit your lip and moaned loudly as you watched him orgasm for the second time that night.

"Fuuuck-urgh, baby!"

He trembled and with one last thrust, he pulled out of you and fell down beside you with a heavy but satisfied sigh.

"This November has been the best and worst of my life," you sighed and Johnny laughed in agreement as he kissed your forehead and snuggled you closer.

-

probably my favourite smut i've ever written, but what do you think?

#johnny knoxville fanfic #johnny knoxville jackass #jackass #jackass x reader #johnny knoxville #jackass imagine #chris pontius #dave england #ehren danger #preston lacy #ryan dunn #wee man #johnny knoxville fluff #johnny knoxville smut #johnny knoxville imagine

[half-dead-ham]

I've waited this long

Day two of Shipweek is Soulmates! And so I offer the masses a humble Roy Harper/Danny Fenton ship, so rare they don't even have a ship name yet! Upon the offer of one, I may be tempted to make more of this ship, they are a match made in hell imo. ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

here's: [Ao3]

Despite how much Danny’s parents invest in the scientific method, they were never one’s to believe in things like ‘fate’ or ‘destiny’. They stood by their ideals that ghosts were real but soulmates were things people imagined so much a market grew for it, despite forty per-cent of the population having one.

 So of course the first thing Danny’s parents did when Danny showed off the white ring he got on his left middle finger was tell him to take it off.

 He told them he couldn’t, of course. Danny didn’t know what soulmates even were, he was only four. When he asked them why, they thought he was playing a prank. They tried to take it off his finger by force, but of course it wouldn't budge. They ran tests and did experiments and theorized and hypothesized and hummed and hawed until they were pulling their hair out.

 And still the ring would not leave little Danny Fenton’s finger.

 They finally settled on Danny having some sort of allergic reaction with the metal and surrounding samples of ectoplasm bonding the ring to his finger temporarily and told him to test it every once in a while to see if it came off.

 And then they forgot about it.

 Jazz found Danny later, curled up and crying on his bed after the whole ordeal. She comforted him, told him what the ring actually was, and said that if he ever did find his soulmate that he shouldn’t bring it up to his parents. He silently agreed, then drifted to sleep in her arms.

~~~~~

    Stupid idiot. Stupid Danny. Why did you follow Rory into a city you didn’t have the map for?

 Danny kicked a crumpled can along the sidewalk, watching it skitter along the pavement as he tried to remember which street he had turned from. He honestly didn’t even want to be here, in a city so far from Amity and his parents, it wasn’t his idea to sign him up for the end-of-school field trip; it was Jazz’s. Danny would rather be back in Amity Park, playing DOOMED with Tucker while they figure out what classes they were most likely to have together in high school.

 Instead he was lost in a city he’d never been to, thanks to his free time buddy, Rory, leading him around after stealing his phone and stranding him without the map they were given. Jackass.

 Another kick to the can sent Danny’s current stress relief straight into a storm drain. Danny froze, staring at the spot it had disappeared, before letting out a sound that was half growl, half groan. Stomping back on his original path, Danny sneered at his sneakers. He was going to murder Rory over this, there were enough tools in their stupid basement for Danny to beat that stupid smirk off that ass and- “Oof!”

 Danny staggered back a step, clutching his nose as he blinked up at what- who- he had bumped into.

 Concerned jade eyes met his lake blue as a boy slightly taller than him rushed to grab his shoulders and stabilize him. He froze, deer-in-the-headlights style as the stranger swept his eyes over the rest of Danny to make sure nothing was damaged.

 “You okay?” The other asked, jolting Danny out of his daze.

 “Uh, yeah, of course!” Danny squeaked out, feeling a small embarrassed flush warm his face.

 The stranger looked down slightly, to Danny’s confusion. He quickly realized he still has his hand over his face like an idiot.

 “Ope- yeah totally okay!” Danny quickly tore his hand away from his face in further embarrassment, really hoping he was right in not feeling any signs to the start of a nosebleed. Just to make sure, he checked his palm, giving a small sigh of relief at not seeing any red, just some light pink on his finger… Wait-

 He spun his hand around, making sure to check if his ring really had turned pink.

 “Holy shit,” the guy in front of him whispered, and looking up Danny could see him inspecting his own pink ring. Maybe he should thank Rory instead of murdering him, the guy led him to his soulmate after all.

 The guy- his soulmate oh god he needed to tell Jazz- looked up to him, stunned and a little awestruck. Danny, for lack of anything else to do, stuck his hand out with a goofy grin as he introduced himself.

 “Hey, my name’s Danny; Danny Fenton. Looks like you’re my soulmate.”

 ∆•∆•∆•∆

 So as it turned out, the guy -Roy was his name- was a Star city native. After they made their introductions Danny asked if Roy knew the way back to his hotel. Roy gave him the most confused look he’d seen on him (yet) and told him that he’d almost made it to a completely different part of the city, and “why the fuck are you in the south side to begin with?” And, well Danny sheepishly explained his situation as they started walking the right way back.

 While Roy didn’t say much to his explanation, the brilliant vermillion Danny’s ring turned probably meant that he and his soulmate had the same thoughts about Rory at the moment.

 It was nearing supper time by the time Danny and Roy made it back to the hotel, and Roy was unfortunately witness to the rant Danny’s teacher went on about “Staying with his buddy” and “not following strangers in a large city”. As soon as Roy held their rings up she redacted her last statement with a click of her jaw. Roy then proceeded to explain to Ms. Montal about how Danny’s “buddy” left him stranded in a different part of the city without his phone, and how if Roy hadn’t found him that she might’ve had to resort to calling the police and explain how unsafe it was to have kids running around the city unsupervised.

 Yeah, Danny was definitely glad Roy was with him at that moment. The nice shade of red that tinted Ms. Montal’s face -either in embarrassment over being so thoroughly called out by someone the same age as her students, or seething rage- had Danny moving a hand over his mouth to muffle his suppressed laughter. He didn’t know if it was any help, if the glare that could melt steel he got from his teacher was any indication.

 After they got to watch the lovely conversation Rory had with their teacher for leaving Danny behind, he asked if Roy wanted to come up to his room to talk some more after they had supper. Roy refused, saying he had somewhere to get to and the dinner was already pushing his time into the ‘late’ category. He asked if there was any good time for them to meet up the next day, but again their schedules didn’t line up. Roy asked about the day after, but they couldn't meet then, as tomorrow was their last day in the city.

 Danny stared at his shoes, at a loss for what to do. He really wanted to spend more time with his soulmate now that they’ve met, especially when Roy had so many stories about his mentor/foster father and his screw ups.

 “Well, you have a phone right?” Roy asked. When he nodded Roy’s face split into a grin. “Then you can just give me your number!”

 They ended up trading both phone numbers and emails, just in case. Apparently Roy had just as much of a chance to break or lose his phone as Danny did.

 With one last wave, Roy walked back the way they had come, the light of the dying sun setting his red hair ablaze. With how far apart they lived, Danny wondered if they would ever get to see each other again face-to-face.

 He hoped they would.

~~~~~

  Star City

 August 28th 2006,

15:07 PDT

 While getting a ride back from Oliver's house Roy felt something. He didn’t know what that something was exactly, but it felt like someone just hit him with a live wire and dunked him in a bath of hydrogen peroxide.

 It hurt.

 It hurt like someone haddunked him in acid, slammed him into an electric fence then gave him a million paper cuts and bathed him in lemon juice. It hurt so much he screamed and blacked out.

 Apparently it hurt so much for Oliver to pull the car over, because the next time he could see clearly he was leaning up against the side of the car on the pavement. Olliver was in front of him, worry clear on his face. He blinked as his mentor fretted over him, thoughts not really deeper than ‘god that hurt like a bitch’. 

 A light wind brushed his cheek and the cold stuck in tracks down to his chin. Absently, he brought his hand to his face, feeling the damp trails that led to his chin. Was he crying? He groaned, twitching with aftershocks and trying to think about anything other than the feeling of full body pins and needles he had.

 “Roy,” his mentor called, voice shaken. Why was the Green Arrow so shaken over what just happened?

 Roy looked to his mentor, only to find that Oliver was looking at the hand he had raised to his cheek. Dread settling in his stomach, Roy shakily lifted his hand up.

 The band around his middle finger was charcoal black.

 It felt like someone had just squeezed all the air out of his lungs. It couldn’t- no. Danny was fine.  They had just talked yesterday, he couldn’t be dead! There was no way Danny could have died, it was impossible.

 Roy was shaking now, for a completely different reason than the pain he just felt. He jerkily grabbed the ring between two fingers, desperately trying to- to- to do something! Either to rub the dirt (it was just dirt it had to be Danny couldn’t be dead) or keep the piece of jewelry from crumbling off his finger. It still felt solid, despite its colour being the exact color soul rings turn when a person’s soulmate dies. 

 Desperately he looked to Oliver. He was the adult here, he should know what to do, right? 

 But the stare Roy got back from his mentor was one full of grief and sadness, not the look he got when he was able to help, just loss. Roy’s lungs weren’t drawing in breath. His hand went from his ring to his phone, ripping it out of his pants pocket and dialling the one number he needed to pick up right now. Please Danny please pick up.

 The Dial tone rang once, twice, thrice. The whole time Roy repeated please pick up please pick up please pick up in his head, eyes never leaving the black band on his finger.

 “Roy?” Danny’s voice rasped through the receiver and Roy’s lungs finally caught breath.

 “Holy fuck Danny, are you okay? What happened‽” Roy nearly screamed into the phone, to Oliver's clear shock as he looked between the still black band and the cellphone in Roy’s hand.

 “Nothing,” Danny groaned, clearly still in pain. “I just got a small shock from one of my parents' inventions.”

 “Bullshit,” Roy shot back. “If you call what you got a ‘small shock’ then where the fuck did the police TAZER shoot me from?”

 Another groan from the other end of the line, along with the sounds of hushed voices that he couldn’t make out. Rustling fabric and soft footsteps was all that he listened to for what he thought was too long until Danny spoke up again.

 “Look, I don’t really know what to tell you right now, Roy… I just feel like I got hit by a train and everything’s still kinda…” Danny trails off for a moment, making Roy worry that he passed out or something, but a sigh fills the call with static and then Danny’s back. “I just really need a bit to not feel like shit now, Roy. You think I can call you back tomorrow? We can talk more then.”

 Was- wh- is Danny really just brushing all that pain off? Like it was nothing?? Like ‘oh, of course Danny, all you need is a little sleep and you’ll be good to go tomorrow!’ Fuck no, thats not how this works!

 Another grunt of pain makes its way through the line, and Roy sighs. ‘Danny is alive,’ he reminds himself, ‘and he’ll still be alive then he wakes up tomorrow’. Even while thinking it the words sound like a lie. The band around his finger is still black. Logically Danny shouldn’t be talking with him at all, he shouldn’t have been able to pick up the call. A small voice in the back of his brain whispers to him, ‘Someone got to him, someone who wanted to use him to get to Green Arrow. That isn’t Danny on the phone, it's a fake’. It's a part he’s afraid to prove right.

 “Sure, Danny. Just- just tell me one thing right now, okay?” He’s practically begging his soulmate -who he thinks is his soulmate- as his voice grows dry. A grunt was all he got in reply.

 “What color is my ring right now?”

~~~~~

 Star City general hospital

 November 12th 2007,

15:07 PDT

 Danny is dead, for real this time.

 Roy doesn’t know when it happened, he’d been taken by Luthor and his goons for the last three months and the whole experience was a bit of a blur, but sometime during that Danny's ring finally crumbled off his finger.

 He sat in the hospital bed, refusing to acknowledge the tears coming from his eyes as he stared at his bare finger. ‘I should’ve been there for him, I should have made sure he was okay.’ His thoughts spiraled as he wished, begged, for the ring to magically reappear on his finger. He prayed to every higher power he could think of to bring Danny back. Just one more day with his stupid texts, his long rants about the stars, his anything. He’d give the world to hear his soulmate's voice again.

 A knock on the hospital room door had him scrambling to wipe his face of tears and clear his voice as quietly as he could.

 “Come in,” he tried not to croak. He could tell it was Ollie as soon as he opened the door, but still he didn’t turn his head.

 “Roy…” His mentor didn’t know what to say either, he almost wanted to scoff. Of course the old man didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know the first thing about having a soulmate. In the end it was something he had to deal with himself.

 They stayed there, silence choking them like a snake coiling around its prey. Roy really didn’t want his old man to see how bad he was taking it, and his old man couldn’t console him for the gaping emptiness he was feeling. So they just did nothing, frozen like a picture in time.

 Finally, a sigh escaped the man behind Roy. “I’m sorry I couldn’t find you sooner,” he murmured out. He sounded so broken. And still Roy didn’t turn to face him, he just struggled and failed to keep a sob from escaping him.

 That day Roy told himself to keep the memories he had of Danny close to him, and to never speak about him to anyone again.

~~~~~

Star City

January  19th 2011,

21:25 PDT

 ‘Everything… Was a lie. Everything I knew about myself isn’t real. I was just a pawn, a chess piece for someone else's game.’

 Vandal Savage, that asshole.

Roy (was he even really Roy if he was just a replacement?) was in… not his room. It was Roy’s room in Ollie’s place. It was dark, he didn’t bother to turn the light on when he came in and was just watching the lights of the city from out his window.

 What… What should he do now? He can’t just go on living somebody else's life now that he knows it isn’t his own. That would be wrong, and fucked up even for him.

 But Guardian, he had said that the light didn’t have the real Roy. If the light didn’t actually have him, then where was he? He refused to believe the real Roy was actually dead, those fuckers wouldn’t kill him off after cloning him. It was too easy, to just dispose of a chess piece that still has use? No, they wouldn’t do that…

 Right?

 He stood up and walked to the window, tracing the lights of cars criss-crossing along the roads like lines of ants.

 No. No, he refused to believe the real Roy was dead. He couldn’t be, he would eat his bow before he believed the real Roy wasn’t still out there.

 And Roy was, he would find him.

~~~~~

Washington D. C.

March 8th 2011,

21:07 EDT

Today's search with Jim was a bust, a complete waste of time. Even with the new tech provided by the league, the Wayne Ecogram unit told them the exact same thing as what we already found the last dozen times we went down there. Nothing. Not a scrap or clue or anything.

 He layed in bed on his stomach as he groused over the day. He could still feel that Roy was alive somewhere, like an itch just under his skin. It was telling him to keep searching, look, find him but people were starting to lose faith.

 He was just so tired. He hadn’t moved in hours since he got back, just thinking over what little they knew of what happened. He turned his head so he could see out of the window. The lights still shone from the city outside, people going on with their nights- with their lives- while he was stuck watching as time marched forward mockingly. His neck protested the movement, muscles sore from overwork and the strain of being still for hours making itself known as he finally moved to haul himself into a sitting position.

 On a brighter note, Jim had his lab work come back. They were in the same boat now, both being cloned from the same guy. Though somehow he still felt like they weren’t on the same page.

 Jim already had his own identity, his own self built personality. He wasn’t meant to be a copy of someone, a replacement. No, Jim wasn’t aware of the feeling of getting the rug ripped out from under your feet because you find out (in the worst way possible) that the life you’d been living, the fucking name you used, wasn’t your own. He was blissfully unaware of how that sucker punch to the gut felt, and so it left him alone even with someone like him to understand.

 And he was just. So. Tired.

 But he couldn’t rest.

~~~~~

Star City

November 9th 2011,

17:22 PST

 Ten months.

 It has been ten months since this search had started for the real Roy, and not even the Bats have found anything. The League has resorted to tailing Luthor on rotation for any clues, but they’ve started asking why they were still trying.

 ‘Roy’ had pulled Robin away to Star City with him, so they could go through the original Roy's things. He honestly hadn’t bothered to touch most of the older things in Roy’s room, he was too focused on the mission at the time to care for whatever little civilian interaction he had kept for convenience. It had taken some convincing, but Robin at least saw how hard he was working.

 “Dude, when was the last time you checked your inbox?” The Boy Wonder asked as he scrolled through old emails and spam on a laptop he had found buried under a clothes pile.

 “A while,” he drawled sarcastically as he searched an old box of trick arrowheads. Honestly why did he even have these in here?

 Robin continued to scroll as he quickly lost interest with the box, shoving it off his lap in frustration and moved to pick through the bottom of Roy’s closet. Quiet settled for a while, with only the occasional sounds of ‘Roy’s grunting and the clicking of the laptops trackpad keys.

 “Hey Roy…” He turned to look at the Boy Wonder as he read something from the laptop, eyebrows scrunched together behind his pointless sunglasses. “Since when did you have a soulmate?”

 The question struck him like an arrow to the heart, making him straighten where he sat. He had almost forgotten by now that he- Roy- had had a soulmate before he went missing. A wave of sadness washed over him as he realised Roy would never be able to see Danny again.

 “I don’t,” he replied softly, unsure of how to feel over those memories. “Danny died sometime while I was kidnapped by Luthor, I didn’t know about it until I was in the hospital.”

 “Who told you that?” Robin asked cautiously, eyes going back and forth from the screen to his face.

 “I…” He… couldn’t remember. He could’ve sworn it was Ollie, but he couldn’t remember having the conversation- with anyone. Just the immense feeling of loss afterwards. But it was something so important to him- to Roy- why couldn’t he remember? “Why?” He asked instead, “what did you find on there?”

 Robin just shuffled up the bed some, making space for him to sit down beside him. At first he didn’t understand what he was looking at, just a short message from Danny; nothing too personal, just saying something about him being worried over him and asking to get in touch when he could. It read like one of their old conversations they would have before Luthor got him, so why was Robin showing him this?

 “Look at the date it was sent,” Robin instructed, pointing to the little bar showing when the email was sent. His eyes grew to saucer size when he realized why it was of interest.

 “September eighth, 2009?” He mumbled out dazedly. The email was sent over two years after  he died? That didn’t make any sense, why would someone use Danny’s old email just to send him something like this?

 “Who told you your soulmate was dead, Roy?” Robin asked again, and he realized that he didn’t have an answer. No one had told him that Danny was dead, he just remembered it.

 “N-no one… I just remember that he died while…” The realization hit harder than Superman, knocking the air from his lungs and leaving the Boy Wonder to finish his thought for him.

 “You just remember that he had died while you were with CADMUS. You never thought to check your sources because you thought you just lost him, but maybe you should look into that now.”

 He could only nod in agreement as he reread the email over and over again.

~~~~~

Amity Park, Il

December 12th 2011,

11:27 CST

‘Roy’ knocked on the door of the townhouse that could hold the answers he needed to find the real Roy. He looked up, tilting his head at the chrome UFO stationed precariously on the roof of the building. Something told him that the Drs. Fenton did not have a permit for that thing, but from what he could remember of his -Roy’s- conversations with Danny, there wasn’t a government that could really stop the Fentons from doing what they wanted. Still, someone had to have tried, right?

 Robin was probably looking into it from where they parked up the road, along with whatever permits they needed to keep that thing that had just pulled out of the driveway from being impounded and torn for scrap.

 His head snapped back to the door as it opened, revealing- oh god.

 Danny was definitely taller than he remembered, paler too. His original’s soulmate now stood a head taller than he did, which when he was over six foot was saying something, with lean arms running up into a baggy t-shirt, no doubt hiding more lean muscle underneath. Maybe he did track or swim in high school? He was still Danny though, the same guy Roy met all those years ago when he was still trying to make Ollie take him on as an apprentice after his parents died. The same kid he helped get back to his school group and the kid he almost punched someone over.

 God, he missed Danny.

 Eyes a much brighter blue than he remembered widened so much it looked like they were about to pop out of their sockets, he almost wanted to laugh before they narrowed, zeroing in on where he knew he had his hands. Danny looked from his hand to his face -which he kept carefully neutral- before sighing, leaning himself against the frame of the door with a silent curse.

 “Please tell me Vlad didn’t make you,” he asked, looking even more tired than when he opened the door.

 “Whose Vlad?” He responded, twisting his face in confusion. Danny gave him a long, hard look. Neither of them blinked, and he was starting to get worried as to whether or not Danny would actually talk to him.

 Finally, with a sigh Danny turned to walk inside, leaving the door open for him to walk in. “No one,” he grumbled before he trudged into the living room. “Let's chat, clone boy.”

 ∆•∆•∆•∆

 When Danny had asked if anyone knew they were meeting, he hadn’t expected for him to ask to go get Robin from the car for the conversation. “My parents will be out for a while, they got a signal from the other side of town. Might as well take this chance,” he said to brush off the Boy Wonder’s concerns of them having their chat in the living room.

 “So,” Danny started as he clapped his hands together. “Since you haven’t attacked me yet, we can start with your names.”

 “You can call me Rob,” Robin said from the seat next to him.

 “Roy,” he reluctantly gave, to which Danny shook his head looking disappointed.

 “Nope, try again. I asked for your name, not the name of the guy you were cloned from.” Robin stiffened at the mention of the real Roy, having not yet been told about Danny’s earlier comment.

 “How do you know that?” The Boy Wonder questioned, falling into his mentor's way of interrogating.

 Danny just snorted, “You think I don’t know my own soulmate when I see him? This guy isn’t him; I know ‘cause you can’t clone a soul ring.” He held up his left hand, showing the grey band on his middle finger. A jolt of relief surged through him, the ring wasn’t black, Roy was alive!

 “And how are you so sure of that?” Robin prodded, keeping the conversation on track for the two of them so he could have his validation in peace.

 “Wouldn’t you like to know, waterboy,” Danny quoted at Robin before turning back to him. “So, do you have a name yet or do we need to think of one?”

 The question was asked with a tone so soft he thought Danny thought he might break at the suggestion. It was kind, just as kind as he remembered Danny to be. He glanced at Robin before looking at his own hands, uncertain.

 “I… I don’t- I haven’t thought of one yet,” he stuttered, feeling suddenly far too vulnerable. He didn’t want to look up at his originals’ soulmate's face, scared of what he’d see. Funny how he could face world ending threats and yet this civilian from some small ass town in the midwest was the thing that scared him more.

 He heard Danny shift from in front of him as he spoke, “Alright.” The word was spoken so gently he had to look up, just to see if he meant it like that. Pools of ice froze the breath in his lungs as he stared at an expression so full of melancholy. Fuck, why is Danny looking at him like that? Why is he looking at him like he’s seen what he’d done -what he is- and understands?

 Danny is just a civilian, isn’t he?

 Their stare broke as Danny looked to Robin. “So, if you aren’t here ‘cause of Amity’s problems or Vlad, what are you here for?”

 Robin was about to answer, but he cut him off. “We need your help.”

 Those icy-blues turned back to him with a tilt of his head. “Help? What help can I give you?”

 He swallowed, mouth dry, “We need to know anything you know about Roy- the real Roy. It might be a stretch but we’re running out of options.”

 “And why do you think I know anything about where he is when nobody’s told me anything about what you’ve been doing for the last five years?” Danny’s eyes glanced between the two heroes before him. “I mean, I know he’s not dead. I’ve checked more than a few times to make sure. And since I’m pretty sure he’s in the living world I can’t help you magically find him.”

 “Living world?” Robin asked before either of them had the chance to decipher what that could mean.

 Danny looked between the two across from him, face twisted in utter confusion. “You mean after all this time, even when I have two of the Justice league Juniors here-” he lifted his hand to stop whatever denials Robin was going to try to start. “-Yes I know you work with the Justice League, I’d be stupid not to know who works with the ignorant Super Friends when they’ve been ignoring every call for help we’ve sent. You also work in such a similar occupation to the town hero to have been cloned, but that's not the point. The point is, you came to Amity Park, the most haunted place on earth- to Fentonworks- and you haven’t done your research?”

 Silence filled the room as the two heroes looked at each other. What do they even say to that? Apparently Robin knew, as he looked back to Danny, sitting his elbows on his knees and steepling his fingers over his mouth.

 “How about we all start from the beginning?”

 ∆•∆•∆•∆

 So.

 Ghosts are apparently real. That was not something he expected to have confirmed today. Robin looked to be in a similar state of shock, though the bat-poker face kept his expression level for anyone not used to their microexpressions. Danny had a similar look of contemplation, though much less surprised.

 “So let me get this straight. You-” Danny pointed to him, “-were created five years ago by an evil extension of the American government with funding by an evil-er billionaire. You took Roy’s place so you could make it to the big leagues so that this evil billionaire and his evil friends could gain control of said big leagues. Because Roy had a soul ring and you don’t, they gave you the implanted memory of me dying so you wouldn’t think to check in on me and accidentally throw off your mission. You succeeded in getting control of the Justice League, found out you were actually a clone, then promised to find your original. Now you’re here because you're running out of ways to find him. Did I get all that right?”

 The two heroes nodded dumbly, before Robin piped up. “And let's see if I get what you’re telling us.”

 Danny nodded as Robin took a breath. “So. Ghosts are real. Your town has been dealing with ghosts for the last six years without help from the Justice League because you stopped trying to call for help after year three. Your town hero has fought world destroying beings and gods and no one ever noticed. Five years ago was the last time you heard from Roy, but you know he’s alive because A. You’ve tried looking for him in the literal realm of the dead, and B. Your soul ring hasn't gone black and crumbled yet. Did I miss anything?”

 “You forgot the part where the whole town basically has a bone to pick with the league now ‘cause they never even answered our calls, and the secret government facility trying to capture and experiment on anything with even an ounce of ectoplasm in their systems with a base right outside the town limits.”

 Robin took in another breath and held it. “Right, that too,” he squeaked out.

 Looking back to Danny, he tried to examine him more than he could at the door. Eyebags so deep you could sleep in them, musculature suited for dodging and running, rather than brute strength, faint scarring crisscrossing both arms reaching as far as his collarbones.

 “You fight them,” he realized.

 Danny shrugged, “When I have to, yeah. You won’t find many people in Amity that don’t have these kinds of scars. Even the kids have a few good scrapes here and there.” He looked down then, eyes following the paths his scars made with an expression of someone who’d seen too much for his age. The same kind of look he knew greeted the Team whenever one of them looked in the mirror.

 Heavy silence engulfed the living room as the two heroes tried to come up with something to say to this civilian, to console or apologize or to rectify years of neglect- something. But there was no excuse for this. For what the whole town -for what Danny- had to go through, no words were enough to make that right.

 It wasn’t his place to apologize anyway.

 Instead he stood up, Robin following quickly after. “Well, this was enlightening in more ways than one, but since you can’t tell us where Roy is we have to go find answers somewhere else.” He remarked with no heat, he couldn’t even find it in him to sass.

 He was so hopeful that this would give them something, anything more than just to prove that the real Roy was alive. They found that out, at least, but no clue as to where Luthor might have hidden him. This was their last real lead, even if it was a longshot.

 A noise from behind them had him turning to see Danny following them. “Now where do you think you’re going?” Danny asked them.

 “Back? We need to track down more leads or nothing will be done,” he replied.

 “We also need to report the situation in your town. This was a major oversight, and it needs to be rectified,” Robin added on.

 “Not without me you’re not,” Danny said as he crossed his arms.

 He gave Robin a look of confusion as Danny continued. “I’ve waited this long to hear something about my soulmate and you think I’ll stay put when you tell me he needs help? Fat chance of that.”

 “It’s too dangerous for a civilian,” Robin tried to argue. “If we do find him he’ll be surrounded by highly trained guards. It would devastate Roy if he came back and you weren’t there.”

 “That’s why I’m going,” Danny argued back. “And who said anything about me being a civilian?”

 Before either of them could ask a bright light sprung from Danny's waist, splitting in two and crossing his body. Where the light passed Danny changed, from a t-shirt and jeans to padded cloth and armor. Green eyes stared at them under ethereal snow white hair, accented by a sharp smile.

 “Meet the town hero,” Danny quipped in a voice of static and screams.

~~~~~

Tibet

February 14th 2013,

02:01 BT

 “Your source better not be wrong, Phantom,” Will hissed at the half-ghost as he crouched behind the outer wall of a League of Assassins base.

 “Trust me Will, Dani knows better than to joke about something this serious,” Danny whispered back, scoping the place out from the inside just to make sure. Dani knew how serious this was, sure, but Danny said he still needed to see it with his own eyes.

 It had been a little over two years since Danny had joined Will on his search for his template. Another two years of searching for someone the rest of the League thought was dead, even if the evidence to the contrary wrapped around Danny’s finger. Even Dick and Jim, the two who had held out the longest, had turned their backs on the search. Now it was just him and Danny, and Danny’s clone whenever she decided to give them a lead with a call.

 “One more door,” Danny murmured through the comms. “This door is even more heavily guarded than the others, think this is the one Dani was talking about.”

 It was quiet for a few seconds as Danny bypassed the guards and the door, and the silence stretched longer than Will thought acceptable. “Phantom?” He asked through the line.

 A rough breath enhanced the light static that never seemed to go away with Phantom on comm. It was shaky, and Danny didn’t need to breathe in his ghost form. “Did you find something?” Will asked urgently.

 “It's him,” Danny croaked, before putting a little more force in his words. “It’s him, Will. We found him.”

 Will has wanted to hear those words for the last three years. He wanted to laugh, he wanted to cry, he wanted to scream and dance and hug someone. They found him. After three long years they found him.

 Now they just had to get him out of there.

 “Pull back, Phantom,” he ordered. “We’ll have a better time of extracting him if we get rid of the obstacles in the way first.”

 “On it,” Danny responded. Will readied his trick arrows.

~~~~~

 Danny was reading when Roy woke up. He came to slowly, looking around the room first -checking for possible exit strategies- before his eyes fell on Danny. Danny could see a spark of recognition flash by before his face twisted in confusion. He glanced at his ring, then Danny, then did a double take at his lack of right arm. Panic rose in his face, so Danny put his hand over Roy’s, dragging his soulmate’s attention from his amputated limb back to Danny.

 “I know you want to freak out, but how ‘bout we explain a few things first, okay?” He suggested softly, to which Roy shakily agreed.

 With his other hand Danny snatched up his phone, sending a text to Will that Roy was awake. He ran into the room not five minutes later, followed by Oliver Queen, Roy’s mentor and -to Danny’s not so recent knowledge- Green Arrow. Ollie looked almost like he wanted to cry. Will just looked relieved, Danny could sympathize.

 He’s waited too long for this reunion.

 “Great, the whole gang’s here,” Roy quipped, drawing Danny’s attention back to him. “Now can someone tell me why Danny’s here, why there’s another me, and where the hell my arm went‽”

 Will and Ollie glanced at each other in uncertainty, unsure of where to start and how to let him know gently that he’s been asleep for six years. Danny scoffed, rolling his eyes as he gave Roy’s hand a pat and stood up to be next to the other two heroes.

 “Cowards,” he hissed at them before turning to face Roy, who was looking more than a little lost. “Well Roy, It's nice to finally see you again, now buckle up ‘cause this is one hell of a story.”

 ∆•∆•∆•∆

 Danny watched as the other two left the room, before turning back to Roy. For all intents and purposes he looked like a confused teenager that had just been told he was replaced for six years, but the ring on Danny’s finger was blazing with something hotter than confusion and loss.

 “I said I wanted some time alone, Danny,” Roy ground out. His acting was so clear Danny let a chuckle escape his throat as he sat back in his chair.

 “No luck Roy, I’m not leaving you this time.” A glare was shot his way from the boy on the bed, he brushed it off easily with a smile. “I’ve waited this long to be with you again, you really think I’ll leave you alone so you can ghost me?”

 Roy sneered, dropping the act entirely in favour of a glare so strong it would make Vlad quiver in his boots. “You can’t keep me here, not when Luthor needs a beating.”

 “Keep you here?” Danny chuckled, “who said anything about keeping you here? I want to go with you. If I can’t stop you from leaving I can at least make sure you don’t get yourself in another mess you can't get yourself out of.”

 Roy cocked his head, dropping the glare in favour of a confused look. “Danny, not that I don’t appreciate the sentiment, but you really think you can keep up?”

 Danny looked his soulmate over before he gave a sharp grin, exposing his fangs as he flashed his eyes to green. “If I could keep up with you but older for three years, I can keep up with you for as long as I want.”

 Only the book Danny was reading greeted Will and Ollie when they made their way back to the recovery room.

#dpxdcshipweek2023 #DPxDC shipweek #Day 2 #RoyxDanny #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc #dp x dc fanfic #danny phantom #soulmates #roy harper #will harper #danny fenton #Love these gremlins together #Pls let this not be the only one #I wish for more #Ham's fics

[topazy]

In the shadows

Paring: Stiles Stilinski x reader

Warnings: Swearing

Chapter: 1.10

𝚃𝚘 𝚂𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜 -

𝙸'𝚖 𝟿𝟿.𝟿% 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝙸'𝚖 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚊 𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚖 𝚘𝚏 𝚊 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚊𝚌𝚛𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚌𝚎.

𝙵𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚂𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜 -

𝙻𝚢𝚍𝚒𝚊 𝚒𝚜𝚗’𝚝 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚔𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚢𝚘𝚞!

𝚃𝚘 𝚂𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜 -

𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝙰𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚖𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝! 𝚂𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚖𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚙𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚏𝚏 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚗 𝚞𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚘𝚍𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚛𝚛𝚘𝚠. 𝙸𝚏 𝙸 𝚍𝚒𝚎, 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚜 𝚘𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞.

When Lydia invited you to go shopping with her and Allison, you declined at first, due to hating shopping for clothes and still trying to process finding out who the alpha is, but Stiles begged you to go.

𝙵𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚂𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜 -

𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚍

“Allison, when you said you needed to stop for an errand before we went shopping, a five-mile hike in the woods was not what I was expecting.” Lydia says he's trying to keep up with her.

You felt extremely uncomfortable. It was obvious there was some tension between Scott’s ex and the redhead.

“Before I forgot, I was trying to ask if you were okay with something,” Allison says. Jackson asked me to the winter formal. “Just as friends, but I just wanted to make sure you were okay with it first.”

“Sure,” Lydia tries to hide the hurt and jealousy in her voice, but her facial expression gives her emotions away. “As long as it’s just friends.”

“Well, yeah, I knew. It’s not like I wouldn’t take him to the coach's office during lacrosse practice to make out with him or anything.”

They both go quiet, and you decide to speak up. “I don’t know why either of you would want to be his friends anyway; Jackson is a total jackass.”

When they both give you looks that make you shut up, you text Stiles, demanding he or Scott come and get you.

—

You puff out your cheeks while snapping twigs between your fingers. Allison was letting out her rage, firing arrows into trees, while Lydia desperately tried to make small talk with her angry friend. Leaving you to sit on your own, bored, you’d gone deeper into the forest and lost signal on your phone, so you couldn’t even text Stiles.

“What’s that?” Allison asks, worried at the sound of branches snapping.

“Probably a rabbit, a deer, or... someone walking their dog.”

Allison goes to investigate, leaving you and Lydia alone; the red turns and gives you a knowing look. You shrug, “I didn’t tell her anything.”

She lets out a huff. “Do you really think Jackson is a jackass?”

“Yes. There are much nicer, sweeter, funnier guys out there.”

She lets out a chuckle. “Oh yeah, who?”

“Um, Stiles, Scott…” you trail off when you can’t think of anyone else.

Lydia goes to say something but stops when she notices Scott and Allison approaching.

—

You’re made aware of the sheriff’s presence when he lets out a sigh and says, “Good evening, Mori.”

“Hi Mr. Stilinski,” you say from your spot on Stiles' bed.

“Are you aware my son isn’t home yet?” He looks amused when you nod. “I’ve just gotten home myself, so how on earth did you get in?”

You take out a set of keys from your jacket pocket and hold them up, saying, “Stiles got me a set made.”

The sheriff shakes his head and says, “Of course he did. I’m assuming this was after your mom called the cops because she thought a burglar was breaking in when it was actually my son.”

“Actually no,” you do your best to stifle a laugh at the look on his face. “Stiles already had keys made to mine and Scott’s house; he just prefers the window.”

“That’s what I was afraid of.”

—

“Hey!” You frown at Stiles when he rips an old comic book from your hands and tosses it onto his bed and says, “I was reading that.”

“We need to go now,” he says seriously. “This is life or death.”

You uncross your legs and reach for your shoes without urgency, asking, “What’s going on?”

“Scott’s mom is on a date.”

“Okay? What's so deadly about that?”

He gives you a look that silently screams we are screwed. “Melissa is on a date with the Alpha!”

“Oh shit,” you scramble to your feet and grab your jacket that’s hanging on the back of his door. “We need to go right now! What's our plan?”

—

“Hold on!”

You brace yourself as Stiles rams the back of his Jeep into the Alpha, also known as Peter Halle’s car. This was his master plan for saving Scott’s mom—crashing into her.

“Aww, are you kidding me? Stiles!” She fumes as she steps out of the car.

“Mrs McCall?” Stiles jumps out of his. “Wow, this is... this is just crazy. What a coincidence, huh?”

Peter gets out of the car and gives you a smug look. He knows that wasn’t an accident; he looks almost impressed and mumbles something under his breath.

“Mori!” Melissa waves for you to come out and join them.

Reluctantly, you do. You weren’t the best of liars and had a feeling Melissa would see right through you. Although, anything you said couldn’t have been as bad as Stiles, who claimed he just didn’t see the car.

You try your best to listen to what Peter is saying; he must have figured out Scott was nearby and was talking to him. You could have sworn Peter's eyes occasionally flickers red.

#teen wolf #stiles stilinski x reader #stiles stilinski x you #stiles stilinski #teen wolf rewrite #teen wolf fandom #teen wolf fanfiction #teen wolf x reader #McCall pack #stiles teen wolf #in the shadows #stiles stilinski/reader #stiles stilinski fanfiction #stiles stilinski/you

[cyncerity]

sorry that all of my posts lately have been about literally nothing but i am seething with rage rn so i’m posting

i’m assuming all of us in the g/t circle know about Fern Gully. It’s one of, if not in my personal opinion, the greatest g/t movies ever made. My sister and i used to watch it every time we drove somewhere on these cheap little screens you could attach to the back of a car seat so you could watch movies. We watched it on a weekly basis. It is one of my favorite movies of all time and it’s not just the rose tinted glasses: i can absolutely understand that some of my favorite movies absolutely suck while actively enjoying it (looking at you Strange Magic), but Fern Gully is genuinely such a good movie. the voice acting (mostly thanks to Robin Williams and Tim Curry), worldbuilding, characters, pacing, the soundtrack and animation especially, it’s all incredible. it holds a special place in my heart.

that being said i just learned that there’s a Fern Gully 2 and it absolutely sucks balls.

rant under cut

really i’ve never had a harder time sitting through a movie, and that’s saying a lot since i just mentioned how much i actually enjoy Strange Magic, which is a notoriously hard to watch movie.

In Fern Gully 2 the pacing sucks, every character is butchered, Batty is kinda like how he was in the first movie, but without Robin William’s delivery he feels like an entirely different character, every bit of world building is chucked out the window, i’ve never seen a more nonsensical plot in my life, there’s these 3 baby animals and the movie can’t decide if it wants them to be able to talk or not, and the budget drop is so obvious it’s painful. the only even mildly enjoyable part of this movie is a short lived gospel number Batty sings for no goddamn reason, but i can’t get mad at it for being totally out of place cause it was the only bit that made me smile even a little.

also it’s in Australia?? I get that the first movie had a kangaroo and like 3 shots of a platypus, but other than that it was kinda just an ambiguous rainforest. No one in the first movie sounded Australian. Even if it was in Australia, I guess you could reason that the fairies didn’t have to have the same accents as the humans, right? Maybe Zak (the human guy that gets shrunk: remember him for later in this rant) was from America but was working in Australia? The two guys who sit in the machine throughout the movie are certainly the peak of American stereotypes. But when the first human and villain (he’s a poacher so basically the villain from Tarzan if he was written worse) of Fern Gully 2 is introduced, he is so violently stereotypically Australian that it’s genuinely jarring when he says his first line.

then we meet his boss who…isn’t Australian. Actually, he kinda looks like a short and fat Hitler.

But whatever, maybe the boss is from out of town, too, like Zak. but NO. we then proceed to meet two more humans who are confirmed to live in Australia with American Accents. PICK A LANE MOVIE. Either set the movie in Australia but give no one accents, or give everyone an accent, you can’t just ONLY GIVE ONE GUY AN ACCENT. HOW THE HELL CAN HE DEVELOP A REGIONAL ACCENT IF NO ONE ELSE IN HIS REGION SOUNDS LIKE THAT??

They’re also both such a massive step down from Hexus. Hexus, aka Tim Curry goo, is one of my favorite villains of all time (Toxic Love is a hard song and scene in general to beat), but he had a purpose. He was representing the dangers and evils of human greed and power. He was a very literal force of chaos and destruction. The entire reason he had power to destroy the forest was because of humans, and that’s a massive part of the movie’s theme and moral.

In Fern Gully 2, these two jackasses want money for selling baby animals. That’s it. And it’s not even really the fairies who stop them: it’s a human girl and her Grandpa who Pips met. The entire symbolic thing from the first movie of Zak having to learn from his mistakes and turn on a goal he once had worked towards is gone. In the first movie, it was equally Zak, Crysta, and the rest of the fairies who trapped Hexus again. In this movie, the fairies are powerless (which they say like 100 times), the humans are doing their best but it’s not doing much, and the only reason the movie turns out ok is cause Crysta shows up for a literal Deus Ex Machina at the very end. It’s so fucking infuriating.

Also, back to Zak: he’s not in this. Like, not even mentioned. There’s one instance of “humans dont know the harm they do to the forest” “well remember some humans do” but that was just foreshadowing the human we meet in this movie who sucks. How can these fairies, who in the first movie believed that humans were fucking extinct, completely forget about the only human they have ever met? Crysta, who by the way isn’t even the main character anymore, never brings him up. Pips (the jerky red haired fairy with the beetle posse), who spends most of the movie around another human and who is the new main character (and maybe the only returning voice actor from the first one), never mentions him. Also, there’s just a FUCKING TOWN NEAR THE FOREST. A TOWN.

remember this shot from the first movie?

yeah apparently it missed AN ENTIRE DAMN CARNIVAL??

Pips, Batty, and the beetle boys take LESS THAN A DAY TO FLY THERE. FUCK THIS MOVIE. SERIOUSLY FUCK THIS MOVIE.

i could go off on more about how the human in this movie (Budgie, which is a stupid ass name) sucks, and now Pips just strolls up to her like “hey” and she’s like “woah a fairy, i’m so shocked you’re real…and now i’m over it, let’s go hang out.” I could also go off about how in the first movie, the entire reason Zak gets shrunk is because Crysta tried to use a spell to make him see her, but accidentally said “size” instead of “sight,” meaning that canonically in this universe, humans can’t see fairies without that spell. So when Pips just waltzes up to the first human he sees, she shouldn’t be able to see him, but whatever. I could also rant about how they made Crysta so disinteresting that she’s probably in less than a third of the film. I could also rant on the three main baby animals who i hate with a burning passion and i was rooting for at least one of them to die throughout the whole movie, but I have homework i need to be doing and grades that are due this friday, i just decided to rant instead of doing stuff lol

#cyncerity #technically g/t? #idk #fern gully #fern gully 2

[my-st0ff]

Self-Inflicted

Chapter Two

Fandom: Jackass

Pairing: Johnny Knoxville x female reader

Chapter Song: NYC - Snow Patrol

Two bodies, one significantly taller than the other, move clumsily into the hotel room. The reckless nocking of furniture and other pieces of clutter being due to the two of your keeping your eyes screwed shut as your lips press together. P.J's hands are everywhere all at once. You want this so bad, you've wanted this. You pull him by the collar of his T-shirt to the edge of the bed. Now finally making eye contact, he smirks - devilish. He catches a pile of cameras in the corner of his eye and jogs over to them in the corner.

P.J: "Is this on?"

You: "Those are the pile of broken ones- quit stallin' we ain't got time"

He starts to walk casually back to you with his hands in his pockets.

P.J: "See, that's where you're wrong. We got all the time in the world, toots"

One hand escapes a small pocket of his Dickies and cups your cheek, the rough pad of his thumb brushing back and forth of your cheekbone. He glances at the bed you both stand beside.

P.J: "You sure you wanna do this? We don't have to- of course. It's just, you switched up pretty fast"

You: "Hey, sex is different. We can still... satisfy our needs without having to ruin what we've got"

P.J: "I suppose your right... in that case"

His mouth launches toward yours with carnal instinct. You bring your hands up to play with his hair roughly, making him moan into your mouth as you make out animalisticly. Since you'd decided this was only about sex, you'd both silently agreed this was finally the time to let out all your horny tension on one another. His hands move to your hips and squeeze them painfully hard. P.J whispers a low "fuck" into your mouth when your body perfectly fills out his hands. You both twist round so that you can sit on the bed with him standing in-between your legs, looking down at you. He brushes a hand through his slick hair quickly.

P.J: "lay back"

You do as he says, and soon enough, hear belt buckle sounds and then the distinct noise of metal and leather hitting the ground.

P.J: " One last time, are you sure?"

He asks whilst literally standing over you with his penis out.

You: "my god, yes P.J!"

P.J: "no need for the attitude"

He says and then immediately his cock is inside you, almost a sort of punishment for being sassy.

You: "Oh my god!"

P.J folds his body over and hooks one arm around you so that he can pull you up to him and kiss you whilst he pumps in and out of you not so gently.

You: "Y-you feel amazing, Phillip"

The use of his full first name leaves him a moaning wreck all of a sudden. You were the only one who still called him that, and for that case, the only one he wouldn't mind calling him that. This instance, though, left him feeling needy as you affirmed it over a few times after soon catching onto the power it held. You bring your hands up between your bodies so you can rub his chest up and down with the palms of your hands.

P.J: "Oh, y/n, I-I am so close"

You: "already?"

You giggle and tease.

P.J: "Oh, its l-like that, huh?"

With that, he pushes harder and faster than he ever had before, leaving your insides feeling warm from your tummy down to your feet.

You: "mm- oh, fuck, don't stop!"

You cry in a high squealing voice you'd find embarrassing in any other context.

P.J: "I- I'm gonna- where'd you want me?"

He asks frantically, his head dropping to suck hig chunks of skin from your neck into his mouth.

You: "my stomach!"

You shriek with no time to really think about where you wanted it. With that, he pulls out and immediately cums a massive amount onto your stomach. Without even time to complain about your unsatisfied state, he was on his knees before you with a handful of thigh in each hand. He licks his lips whilst staring at your core with eyes that indicated total worship before his mouth was fully dived into you. His tongue moved proficiently, hitting a good spot straight away.

You: "Don't move! Oh my god, right there don't fuckin' move!"

You yelp whilst you shake and jolt on your back. It didn't take barely anything to push you over the edge. When you cum your arms start frantically searching everywhere over the bed for something to grab onto. He notices and throws a hand up from where it was on your thigh so you can grab ahold of it with brutal strength. Finally upur lungs deflate and your body goes limp and tingly. His head flops in-between your legs and he lazily pecks at your inner thigh with his eyes shut. He then pulls said thigh towards his face so he can kiss over it further, tickling you. You giggle a little, making him huff in laughter as you fidget and eventually pull away.

You: "That was... fun"

You sigh, P.J pushes himself up with wobbly knees just to collapse next to you on the bed, still panting.

P.J: "Fun? That was mindblowin', y/n"

You roll onto your side to face him.

You: "Your right. That was amazing, Phillip"

He swiftly does the same with his body so he can face you, your faces inches away from one another.

P.J: "God, keep callin' me that and we're gonna have to go again"

You: "What, your name?"

You tease.

P.J: "You know what your doin'"

You both laugh a little, full of blissful serotonin. Your pupils wander the walls of the hotel room until they lock onto a picture you couldn't believe you'd not noticed before.

You: "God, that's gorgeous, ain't it?"

P.J lazily flops his head over so he's looking at the same framed painting.

P.J: "sure, where'd you reckon that is?"

You: "Oh I know where that is, P.J. That's Sucre, in Bolivia. Only the best city in the world"

You smile.

P.J: "When did you go to Bolivia?"

You: "I haven't, that's the problem. Sucre is number one on my bucket list"

P.J: "Bucket list? Your not 90"

You: "Might as well be. I think my life expectancy went down a significant amount when Jackass formed, Jammy"

The nickname you only ever call him when you're in a soft mood rolls off your tongue and brings great joy to his ears. A warm, large hand of his lands on your stomach and strokes it gently in a comforting manor.

P.J: "Don't talk like that, toots. I'll protect ya'"

He speaks softly.

P.J: "And hey, I could take you there... but I don't know how to get there"

You: "You'd take me to Sucre?"

P.J: "Course I would, I knew you'd always been interested in Japan and got the first movie set in Japan didn't I?"

You: "Mhm... your too sweet"

You yawn, allowing his exploration of your torso to continue.

#Spotify #jackass #johnny knoxville #jackass 2 #jackass two #johnny knoxville x reader #johnny knoville x you #johnny knoxville x female reader #pj clapp

[self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2]

Beautiful Spouse’s Rewatch Thoughts SPN 13x02 The Rising Son

“This version of supernatural is so weird. It’s so different than how we started” “Do we even have monsters of the week anymore?” “that’s pretty extreme. You didn’t even need to break their necks, but he did anyway” “so he’s on level with Dagon with the yellow eyes?” laughter

“Jack can totally hear you btw” “To be fair, there’d be a lot of road noise in the car” “They have Mary miked differently” “angel incoming? What are we dealing with here?” “I would have run off too” “this whole white tie thing - I’m not so sure about” “Idk if I’ve ever seen anyone wear a white tie with a white shirt before” “to be fair, they’d look more like rats” “intentionally dropping his voice?” “don’t throw him the Bible, because he’ll fkn read it and he’ll have a lot of questions for you tomorrow” “good enough” laughter

“God this would have been so much fun to watch on air”

You didn’t like the Jack storyline

“It’s such a departure than what we’re used to. I embrace it now” “He’s fkn gone now. Nope never mind” “What a fkn jackass” 🎶should have kept driving 🎶

“What the fuck” “His whole thing doesn’t make sense. Do you feel any different without an appendix?” No I don’t notice anything different 

“Cas said the same thing. I probably didn’t see that the first time.”

“Oh shit” “still going to fkn do it?” “probably didn’t care about this season last time because Cas died” “how many stages of grief and depression are we going to go through in one episode?” “This season is pretty rough. Cas exploded. How do you recover from that?” “fkn great” “oh hey bitch” “what a cock. Fkn hate this guy. They did a good job turning Lucifer into a villain, ya know?” “I know they were leading up to it, but I totally missed that.” “that guy is way stronger but his blood pressure is 10x stronger so idk” “nice throw” laughter “that’s the first thing that comes out of your mouth after that” “oh yeah. It’s the other guy. I took too long to figure that out” laughter

“We had leviathans. Now we have other world demons and shit. How bad can it be?” “they had to slow-mo the impact. Why would you do that?” “hey bitch” “really cool effect” “Is Asmodeus a one-episode character? Is Jack going to blow him to smithereens? Let’s see it” laughter “the hell is that supposed to mean?” “crunchy. I wonder how they got that sound effect” “end of the line for what?” laughter “fkn drama. Jesus h christ” “maybe don’t threaten the kid but you do you”

#beautifulspouserewatchesspn #supernatural rewatch #supernatural #supernatural s13

[kiss-my-freckle]

I have a hard time watching 4x10 because of the way Stefan treated Elena when Rebekah took away Elena's free will by making her fess up to Stefan and saying she'd get rid of every ounce of pain she gave Stefan. Stefan is all about free will when it comes to Elena dying but had no issue with Rebekah taking Elena's free will away. I hate him. Stefan's "Are you sorry that it happened or sorry that I found out?" had Dawson energy. Stefan didn't care about Rebekah's free will either when he tried to get her daggered while trying to cure Elena without talking to her.

I was just talking on Twitter about Stefan's manipulation tactics. I know the writers wanted to drag out their love triangle another season, but they destroyed Stefan's character in the process because he looks like a total ass. 4x10 is continued manipulation. Neither Rebekah or Caroline know that Stefan already knew about her feelings for Damon. That he actually sent her to Denver and knows they stayed at a motel. Not even Elena knows that Stefan knows they got a motel because she was in the room talking to Jeremy when Damon told him about it. Elena's sex with Damon shouldn't come as a shock to anyone, certainly not to Stefan. He knows she already kissed Damon, knew about her feelings for him, and he sent her to Denver with him just to hear that they got a motel? lol... I mean, come on. Fans should really listen to Caroline when she hears about Stefan and Katherine going to a motel in season 5. Had she known Stefan knew about the motel in season 3, she wouldn't be so quick to view him as a victim in season 4. Even in 6x2, Caroline is apologizing to him because she still doesn't know that he always knew.

HIs "Are you sorry that it happened or sorry that I found out?" sounds ridiculous coming from him because Elena was the one begging Damon to tell Stefan in 4x8. While I agree that they should've taken a single selfish day to enjoy it, I fault Caroline for telling Stefan. "There's something I have to tell you. And it's not because I feel guilty, that it happened. It's because I feel guilty, that you don't know." Worse, is the fact that Stefan knows better because he already heard it out of her own mouth, but it's another manipulation on his part. That's how ignorant as hell they made him look in season 4. The problem with Stefan is that he's acting like he's 17 when he's 162. He should know better. Rather than actually grow in his 162 years of life, his life gave him the ability to manipulate everyone around him, blind them to the reality that he's a jackass. As far as I'm concerned, there was nothing for Stefan to find out because he always knew, and he's revictimizing Elena.

[bunny-lou]

Can you do that poly dating thing in auradon with the core four but someones picking on carlos?

Tumblr has a new update where asks now have dates attached to them and this ask has been in my inbox for almost two and a half years. Whoops!

I've done a poly core four with Evie being picked on and a poly core four with Jay being picked on, but I haven't done Carlos yet or Mal! (I don't think I've done Mal. It may have gotten lost in all the Descendants things I've written in the last 5 years).

Enjoy!

Warning for bullying, mentions of violence and swearing

---

Contrary to popular belief, Mal does not drop everything she is doing any time a member of her crew gets picked on, neither does Jay or Evie (though it's less expected of her). They're all Isle kids, making enemies is part of the fun and they can handle some mean words and a scrappy fight. Especially Carlos, who has faced so much worse shit in his life. None of them need one of these others to come rushing in unless some jackass pulls a knife.

But they've only been in Auradon for a few weeks and Mal has been dying to stake her claim. This seems as good an excuse as any.

Plus, the hallway is lined with Auradon brats, all standing off to the side, some snickering, some scoffing in disapproval, but none of them doing a damn thing.

Two tourney jocks, evident by the jackets they wear with pride, are holding Carlos' books and backpack above his head. Carlos is so agonizingly small next to them, but he's a scrappy fighter and could retrieve his belonging easily, if he were to want to create more of a scene.

It's a good thing Mal and Jay don't care about scenes.

"Hey dipshits!" Mal snarls above the taunting. Students part for her in fear, how exhilarating. "Those don't belong to you. I thought stealing wasn't a problem in Auradon?"

Beside her, arms flexing, Jay tsks. "Sounds like you two should be banished to the Isle."

Evie with her lips pulled back in a feral smile chimes in. "We would appreciate it if you returned Carlos' school supplies to him."

The jocks grin at each other. "What, little man here has to have someone come fight his battles for him?"

"Like the runt of the litter." The other one agrees with a cackle and unzips Carlos' school bag, letting his papers fly out and his pencils clatter to the ground.

Normally, Carlos would have a meltdown at the total disrespect to his homework, but he does nothing more than scowl.

This has been going on for more than just a day.

Mal stalks forward and snatches the front of the jacket of Dumbass One. She pulls him down to her height easily and notes the flick of fear in his eyes. "Leave him alone."

Dumbass One drops the bag at her feet and jerks away, stumbling backwards into a small crowd of watching students.

Evie wastes no time in approaching Dumbass Two and stomping her heel into his toes without a word. He howls in pain, books dropping from his hands as he clutches his foot.

Mal is prepared to tell these idiots to pick up the books, but Carlos is already doing so, hiding them in his arms like they're something precious because, to Carlos, they are.

All Jay has to do is take a step forward, strong and silent behind Mal and the Dumbasses scoff.

"Whatever." Dumbass Two says as he gingerly places his foot down. "Little runt isn't worth the time."

Dumbass One takes a look at Mal's wicked grin before he follows his limping friend.

The crowd has grown considerably. These Auradon kids are probably starved for entertainment. But it's good. Enough students saw that the word will get out to now fuck with Mal's crew. The whispers and points just reaffirm that everyone will know about this before the day ends.

"Come on, pup." Jay stands as he collects the scattered papers and shoves them into Carlos' bag. "Let's get back to the dorm."

Mal waves to the lingering students and Evie blows them all a kiss.

"You could have just let that go." Carlos huffs as they walk, still cradling his books. "It was all work I already turned in and got back. I didn't even need the notes." He rolls his eyes. "The classes here are so elementary."

"Auradon is different than the Isle." Mal tells them as they round the corner to the boys' room. "People here don't realize that we're a gang. They think one of us is fair game from the others."

"They won't think that anymore." Jay snickers as he holds the door open for everyone.

Evie makes herself comfortable on the bed and smooths out her skirt. "Besides, their random nastiness shouldn't go unpunished. Why were they messing with you anyway?"

"They're in my math class. I got the highest score on our test and they're mad about it." Carlos shrugs it off easily as he puts away his books. "They're idiots."

"Dumbasses." Mal agrees with a smirk. "But now they know. You don't get to fuck with any of the Isle kids."

"Not without incurring the wrath of the others." Evie chirps.

"Or without some broken toes." Jay waggles his eyes at Evie as he sits next to her. "That was definitely hot to watch."

Carlos can't hide his grin at them. "I didn't need it though."

"Not this time." Mal extends her hand to him and let's him decide if he wants to hold it. "But if we stayed silent, this would have happened again. We're not going to wait and find out if these Auradon kids are as weak as they seem."

"And we're not going to let them think we're not a crew." Evie tells them both as she playfully swats at Jay's kisses. "They know we're a team and you can't mess with any of us."

"Well..." Carlos puts a finger to his chin. "I guess that's a good point. So," he grins slowly at Mal, finally reaching for her hand. "Thank you."

Mal kisses his scarred knuckles. "Of course, pup."

#core four #rotten four #jaylos #carlos de vil #marlos #carvie #jay descendants #mal descendants #evie descendants #asks #idiefordescendants #filled request #my writing

[disneyanddisneyships]

@gyubby99 I and to make a part two of the fic I just made. It's been making me sad.

warnings: yelling, cursing

Alastor x OC fic

The next morning alastor woke up with a splitting headache.

All of the wine bottles in his room that he had stolen from husker were all empty and Alastor's hangover was bad.

And yet the second he woke up, all he felt was despair.

The woman he was..... infatuated with.... was hurt. And he was the one that hurt her.

He needed to make things right.

But first..... coffee....

Alastor put himself together before walking down stairs, trying his best not to flinch at the slightest sounds or lights.

"Husker, dear friend! May I have some coffee?" Alastor asked with a pained smile at his own voice, which he usually quite enjoys listening to.

"Yeah. It's in the pot," Husker replied from his place on the couch.

Alastor made his way to get some of the coffee before the hotel door opened to reveal angel dust.

"Ah! Angel! May I ask where Aponi is this fine morning?" Alastor asked.

"Huh. After what happened last night, I don't think I should tell ya," Angel answered.

"I'm sorry?" Alastor wondered.

"Oh she told me all about it. Ya now how much she cried? God," Angel scolded.

"The fuck happened?" Husker asked, putting down his newspaper.

"This motherfucker doesn't defend Aponi against val and instead hides his fuckin face cause he's ashamed to be seen with'er!" Angel explained.

"Dude not cool! Valentino is a total sleezebag. It's unlike you not to defend her!" Husk scolded.

"Angel would you just tell me where she is?" Alastor asked, ignoring the looks being given.

Angel huffed. "Shes at the dance studio practicin'. If ya play your cards right, she might forgive you," Angel muttered before walking up the stairs and into his room.

Alastor downed the rest of his coffee before wlaking out of the door.

A few minutes later Alastor walked into the dance studio to see Aponi there with another demon.

"Yeah and then we spin like this-" the other demon stated as he twirled Aponi.

"Oh jeez. That's hard. Are you sure Carolyn can't do thus with you, Alistar?" Aponi asked.

"She practically shouted her refusal when I asked. But you don't have to if you don't want to. I've just gotta find a way to Apologize to my best friend. She's down here because of me and hasn't forgiven me for hundreds of years," the other demon stated.

"Thsn I think that's your fault, my friend. Maybe just try... I dont know... talking to her? Communication is key," Aponi stated.

"Yeah I know.... well anyway. I should get going. I'm supposed to meet my mother for tea," the demon stated before wlaking out of the building.

"Ah I see you've already replaced me, my dear!" Alastor exclaimed as he walked onto the stage.

"He's just a friend. Besides what do you care who I sleep with?" Aponi asked.

"Well i... I dont!" Alastor lied.

"When you lie, your eyebrows furrow, jackass," Aponi stated before taking a gulp of water and putting on her ballet shoes.

"I-... listen, my dear, I'm here to-"

"To what? Apologize? Last I heard, you don't do that sort of thing," Aponi stated as she stretched.

"Darling, I don't just want you to... sleep with me....." Alastor muttered.

"Then what do you want, Alastor? Because you haven't told me shit," Aponi argued as she stood up and began to stand on her tip-toes.

"I just want you, darling," Alastor replied.

Aponi halted her movements and looked at the radio demon.

"And I want someone who's not embarrassed of me," Aponi stated.

"I'm not embarrassed, my dear! I just.... I dont like public displays of affection!" Alastor countered.

"Jesus christ Alastor, what do you want from me?! Sex?! A relationship?! Nothing?! What?" Aponi shouted.

"I...." Alastor trailed off.

"God.... why do you even fucking try?! Why are you here?!" Aponi asked.

"Because I love you!" Alastor answered without an inch of static in his voice.

[heartbrake-hotel]

Ugh. You won't believe this. I'm sorry to bug you, but I just needed to vent.

I saw some idiot on twitter saying that when E met Priscilla he had an eleven year old girl living with him in Germany. They mentioned Scotty Moore said that in his book so I looked it up. What he said was at the time E met Cilla, he had an "even younger German girl" (his words) living in the house with his father and grandmother. Except...well, I can't find any proof of this; there’s no evidence nor mention of this girl (or how old she was) anywhere else in the book nor in any other books written about him. No proof he had anyone else like that living with him in Germany.

So I don’t think that claim is true. Where do people come up with this stuff anyway? How do you not get into an argument with these idiots? Because it's super annoying.

ugh, believe it or not, baby, im not surprised at all. but you could never bug me !!! 💖 sorry it took me so long to answer this, but rest assured i haven't calmed down about this any since you first sent it 😅

a couple notes‐ honestly, i'm inclined to believe scotty. NOT TWITTER to clarify lol.. eleven seems young for him even if you are looking to view e through the most unflattering light possible 😬 but it seems likely to me that he had another teenage girl maybe not uh. officially on the lease or anything but staying over most nights ! more than ONE even sounds plausible.. we all know that someone didn't like his bed cold.!

people who claim to hate elvis sure spend an awful lot of time reviling him on the internet, especially by regurgitating half-remembered anecdotal evidence without citing their sources. 🙄 on the other hand, it's also easy to fall into the trap of too-faithful elvis historian; by that i mean that the fact that so much of his life is documented sometimes makes us complacent in our belief that if it can't be verified by multiple primary sources that it must not have happened. but we can't always say, and getting too involved as if the historical accuracy of one particular proposed event is the end-all be-all of elvis fandom can get exhausting.!

i wouldn't be surprised to find out either way, that this was or wasn't true. but you're free to make up your own mind, and if it distresses you, then fwiw i think you Totally have a leg to stand on affirming it never happened, like you said !! ultimately, it doesn't have much bearing on right now- if you like elvis, this vague and nebulous criticism probably isn't the thing that'll make you stop liking elvis, and if you hate elvis, you're probably determined to keep doing that regardless.

regarding the twitdiots- while looking into this claim i found a lady on there who legitimately believed that agent elvis tells the true story of how e was experimented on and mind controlled into drug abuse by the government.. like she said That with her whooole chest. so i don't put much stock in public opinion over there 😂😂💀

i want to fight those people extremely often (they're not just on twitter, either- it seems to have died down a little praise GOD but especially in early days after the movie there was a wave of ppl on here who would put their elvis hate in the main tags. WHICH DROVE ME BATTY), but i come from the "don't feed the trolls" era of fandom. as much as id like to rip 'em a new one when they rehash the same two issues over and over and OVER again ad nauseum, i content myself with the fact that they're living a pathetic existence in which they actively choose to fill their life with something they dislike for... no discernable reason.?

no one who spends their time bringing up a dead celebrity at all opportunities just to bash them is actually open to a discussion. and i do think there is a discussion to be had- his life was certainly very troubled, and i think there are a lot of nuanced issues that benefit from being spoken about openly !!!

but i like to debate bc i like to WIN- so jackasses tend to be a waste of my time 😘

#ask #if anyone DOES decide to start fighting idiots tho tag team me !!! #ill pop in for a few rounds 👊💥 #i try to just move on without paying it too much attention #and everyone on here is so lovely its a good distraction !!! #i dont think theres any harm in choosing to see the good in people #esp dead people im sorry #like either im right and elvis was a flawed but kind person (all i get is bragging rights) #or im wrong and he was a dirtbag (all i get is . literally nothing) #when i die and meet him ill send yall word but i think we already know what the answer is 😘 #but either way it doesnt have much objective bearing on my life.. #as long as im deluding myself into writing fanfic anyway who cares right?? 🤪 #like who cares if i choose to use him as a vessel to make myself happier #i DO truly believe he was a good person and i think weve p much reached the point where #no one but angie marchese herself could talk me out of that #🙃🙃🙃 #NOTE THIS LOGIC DOES *NOT* APPLY TO PPL WHO MAKE FLOWER CROWN EDITS OF SERIAL KILLERS

[bloodgulchblog]

Would you recommend watching RvB from the beginning? Or at all?

Alright, so. As a person with a pile of interests with either bad creative processes, bad content, or both, I sometimes don't really know how to approach it when people might want in on aforesaid interests.

I guess the first thing about theoretically getting into RvB in 2023 is to know that RT is shitty and was always shitty. This isn't all of it, and quite frankly I don't know all of it, but it's a place to start I guess. If you come in, don't get attached to the people who made it because a lot of them are disappointing.

Red vs Blue, especially early Red vs Blue, makes use of a lot of jokes that aren't okay now and weren't okay then. It's frequently insensitive and crass. Expect things like casual homophobia, "funny" jokes about racist stereotypes, and being weird about women. (It helps that most of the characters are supposed to come across as total jackasses, but. Uh.)

ALL THAT SAID, if you do still want to climb into the dumpster with us and have feelings about this stupid pile of characters and the ridiculous situations they've been in, I have some thoughts about that:

Starting from season 1 is doable if you have a high tolerance for 2000s gamer fratbro-flavored nonsense. I joke that Blood Gulch Chronicles (the collective name for seasons 1-5) is the best because it's the stupidest but I understand why people don't vibe with it. The advantages to this approach are you never have high expectations for RvB and you get to see the characters growing out of one note jokes into ridiculous idiot people, the whole process of it tripping over itself and accidentally finding a plot, and you know all the references later. The downside is... well, it's BGC.

A lot of people say to start with Season 6, the first of the seasons to feature Wash and the show trying to have a more definite plot, but I'm actually not fond of that approach. I think Red vs Blue lives and dies by its characters because the plot has always been too stupid for me to get really invested in it. I think it hits better if you already have had time to bond with the pack of idiots in their idiot vacuum before you hit things trying to be serious. If you start off caring about the troopers before you get invested in the (significantly more competent) freelancers, it will make the whole experience more fun.

So, based upon one trial run with a friend that wanted in a few years back, here's where I'd go:

Start with Season 11.

This might sound like an insane person thing to do on a longrunning show, but trust me.

Season 11 through Season 13 are a complete arc, and are the best one the show ever had. Each "season" of RvB is about the length of a long movie, so it's not an un-doable amount of content to commit to. I watched them with an eye to letting a new person in the last time I did, and they are remarkably self-contained and do a good job of giving you just enough information to know what's going on without requiring the Deep Lore.

I think 11 is the best onboarding spot for someone who has been adjacent to Red vs Blue but never really dug in because the characters are developed, you get a season to get to know them when they're being themselves causing their own problems for a while before the major plot hits them, and the 11-13 arc is just really nicely done (more nicely done than RvB honestly ever deserved.)

If you get through 11-13 and want to know more about these characters, then jump back to season 1 and let your investment and curiosity about the backstories you've seen hints of carry you.

THEN if you still want to watch more rvb, you can cover 15-17 but expect to be miserable because 15 and 16 suck desperately. (17 does a great job trying to apologize for those seasons, but it still stings.)

#rvb tag