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etz-ashashiyot · 1 month

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About Me/FAQs

This is a new blog for a new chapter of my life. Starting over is both a little bittersweet and very freeing.

You can call me Avital. I am a non-binary traditional egalitarian Jew living in the US. Any pronouns except they/them are fine. (!היא/את בעברית, בבקשה. תודה)

I really appreciate human interaction. That being the case, if you follow me and I don't already follow you, please send me a DM with the following:

What you want me to call you (internet name, username, nickname, whatever)

What brought you here and made you want to follow me

Something random about you that you feel comfortable sharing (pet pics are always welcome too <3)

I had a whole lot of other rules on my previous blog to weed out the faint of heart, but I genuinely don't know how well that worked, so instead I will simply put roughly the same information below as resources and recommended reading. Fair warning: I will operate from a baseline assumption that you've done the reading and therefore will not be explaining anything in them.

I also had a listing of my firm opinions and other miscellaneous information. That got long and unwieldy, but a lot of people seemed to appreciate it, so I will post roughly the same list under the cut.

The current username refers to my current symbol of a tree of lanterns in the starlight. This is related to my desire to create self-symbolism, old school style (like I really want to create a family crest, a flag, a seal, and other heraldic nonsense. Why? Because it delights me, of course.)

This page is under construction and subject to change at any time.

B'vracha,

Avital

Recommend Reading

For followers who are Christian, were Christian, are non-Jews who grew up in a Christian culture and/or have only learned about Judaism through Christianity, these links are very helpful in unpacking some of the antisemitism you were taught:

Better Parables (specifically the article about Pharisees, but read the rest of the site too, it's great)

Antisemitic readings of the Temple table-flipping incident in the New Testament

The current Israel-Hamas war and just המצב discourse in general require a lot of background knowledge to discuss intelligently, and not just propaganda. There is a LOT of antisemitism in the public around this topic and it is having serious real-world consequences for Jews all over the world. The mis- and disinformation is causing problems for everyone involved. Islamophobia in the West has increased as well. If you're going to engage in this discussion, I am respectfully but forcefully asking you to read the following sources. They are useful regardless of where you fall on that political scale.

There Is No Magic Peace Fairy

Ways to help: [1], [2], [3]

Is your pro-Palestine activism hurting innocent people? Here's how to avoid that

A non-exhaustive list of antisemitic incidents, attacks, and pogroms during [OP's] lifetime

An exceptionally long and thorough explanation of antisemitism and antisemitic violence throughout history

Why The Most Educated People in America Fall for Antisemitic Lies by Dara Horn (tumblr link in case the article link gets broken)

An excellent overview of the basics

This is nowhere near complete information, but it's an important start. I will very likely continue to add resources as they become available and would love to create a primer on this topic more generally.

About the blog:

I’m going to try my best to keep this blog to primarily Judaism, comparative religion and theology, with the occasional side sprinkling of queer & trans stuff, BUT it is absolutely a personal blog at the end of the day.

I talked about Israel and המצב stuff a lot on my previous blog and will likely continue a bit over here too. I welcome a broad swath of opinions, so long as they objectively treat all parties involved as human and deserving of safety, stability, freedom, dignity, and peace. That is apparently a large ask these days, and a not-small part of why I keep talking about this issue. Please be part of the voices that give me hope for the future, okay?

Minors can follow and interact but please keep in mind that I’m probably closer to your parents' age than yours if you do want to interact with me directly.

Interactions:

Rude asks will be deleted. Harassing blogs will be blocked and probably reported.

I consider anything even remotely in the vicinity of trying to proselytize to me to be “harassing,” or at a minimum, rude. Just FYI.

Otherwise, nice interactions are welcomed.

Banter is encouraged; trolling will be ignored

If I don't respond to your interaction, there's a strong chance that I (a) have no idea what to say and am thinking about it, (2) totally meant to respond and just forgot after the notif disappeared, and/or (3) got incredibly busy. It's not personal! Please don't be shy about following up with me if you like. I promise that if we have a problem that is fixable, you'll know. If we have a problem that is not fixable, you'll be blocked.

I am currently learning Ivrit and am delighted to have interactions in Hebrew. Please feel free to message me, reply to posts or reblog, submit asks, etc. in Hebrew and I will do my best to read and respond to it. (Responses will be slower, but not for lack of appreciation of your thoughts!)

Anything else, just ask.

Hard stances:

You're not going to change my mind on these things; I've looked at the evidence, my personal experiences, and thought about them long and hard, and I am not going to be swayed by an internet rando. I can (often, but not always) co-exist just fine with people who I disagree with, but if seeing my posts about this is going to upset you, just do us both a favor and block me now please.

I am deeply distressed at how many people are choosing to live in a "post-factual society" where the truth is based on truthiness vibes and the politics are based on the quippiest of slogans. I don't care who's doing it, misinfo, disinfo, propaganda, atrocity denial, and gaslighting are BAD. There is no nuance here; these are bad things. They are bad if they go against your cause and they are bad if they "support" your cause. No cause is better than the truth.

If we cannot have a discussion where we are operating from the same baseline reality of verifiable facts, we cannot have a productive conversation and I will not engage with you. We can agree or disagree on a lot and that is fine, but facts matter.

If you cannot be reasoned with in accepting verifiable facts as reality, you need help. I'm serious. That is cult behavior. Get off tumblr and get help.

I don't know how to tell you that you should care about other people. If you don't see the inherent worth in other human beings' lives, I can't fix that. Go take that struggle to G-d and heal your soul.

Queer might be a slur in the mouths of some people, but my identity isn't. Don't reblog my posts if you're going to tag it with "q slur" or "q word" or censored in some way. I'm not Gay as in "I prioritize cis men over the entire rest of the community" but Queer as in "my personal labels are none of your business but my political stance on queer liberation sure as fuck will be."

I support the right of the Jewish people to self-determination in our ancestral homeland of Israel, the same way that I support other indigenous groups' right to self-determination in their ancestral homelands. If you don't, I'm going to need you to examine why Jews should be singled out of every other group to be denied this right or denied support in seeking it. That said, I definitely do not agree with many of the decisions made by the Israeli government, especially (but far from exclusively) regarding their treatment of Palestinians. I think both Jews and Palestinians deserve to live in peace, safety, freedom, dignity, and self-determination for both. No one is going anywhere; any real solution must recognize that. I tend to favor this proposal by A Land for All as an ideal (and given the grassroots nature of this idea, I think it could work pragmatically too, if the political will exists on both sides.)

I waver between calling myself a liberal Zionist and rejecting the Zionist/anti-Zionist dichotomy altogether because it inherently puts the validity of an existing state up for debate rather than looking at real solutions for the future. Bottom line: I'm a humanitarian and a pragmatist, and I care about all the people who call that part of the world home.

🌻 I stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦

Free Iran from the Islamic Republic // Women Life Freedom

Abortion is a human right and should be safe, legal, available on demand, and shameless. It's a necessary medical procedure and it's completely barbaric that we're still talking about it as anything else.

Birth control, abortion, and no-fault divorce are actively positive parts of society and building healthy families.

Transition care is healthcare and also a human right. Allowing people to transition prevents self-harm and suicide, and has an extremely high efficacy rate with an exceptionally low level of risk or regret. We now have well over a century of data on this.

That said, detransitioners who are still supportive of trans people/aren't transphobic are more than welcome here, as any exploratory process deserves the right to say, "Interesting! But nope!"

Transunity, ace/aro positivity, and just inclusionism in general, 100%. Fuck off with anything else.

If you don't vaccinate yourself and your kids for any reason other than medical necessity, and especially if you promote anti-vaxxer views and the associated pseudoscience, you are actively harming the most vulnerable members of society for entirely selfish reasons and that makes you a bad person. I hope your kids bypass you to get vaccinated.

Wear a mask 😷

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williamrikers · 10 months

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okay. fuck. i need to talk about be my favorite. because jesus christ, this might be THE smartest show currently airing, which is a miracle at a time when la pluie is also airing.

so, this episode we learned more about kawi's and pisaeng's family backgrounds, and oh boy, is there a lot to unpack there... and it all works to explain why the original timeline was the way it was, why everything turned out so fucked up for both of them in the beginning.

(very rambly thoughts under the cut)

first of all, it's important to note how much of an impact kawi's father's death had. it was always clear that this was a traumatizing event in kawi's life, literally the first thing he did when he went back in time was to ditch the (supposed) girl of his dreams so he could be with his father, tearfully hug him and tell him "i love you, dad".

now, we're learning that after his father's death, kawi completely gave up on himself. he literally didn't see any reason to pursue a better life or his dreams because his father would never get to see it and be proud of him. i think this also explains to some extent why kawi has so much trouble accepting help from others: he has internalized the idea that he somehow has to do everything on his own, so his father (and others) can be proud of him. it's interesting that kawi obviously loves his father a lot but they're not really close: they don't see each other very often and in the first episode, it's established that they don't usually talk to each other about their feelings, either.

so. everything else that happened to kawi in the og timeline (knot making fun of his singing, pisaeng "stealing" his spot as pear's secret buddy, his falling out with max, kawi being too much of an introvert to make any new friends at uni) was compounded by the fact that after his father's death, kawi saw no hope for himself any more, and he ended up alone, isolated, friendless, depressed and deeply unhappy.

and now that we're learning more about pisaeng as well, it's becoming clear that something similar happened to pisaeng in the og timeline as well, only for him it was not a single event but more the reality of him being gay and having a crush on kawi (come on. nobody can tell me he DIDN'T crush on that cute awkward nerd as soon as kawi dropped his lil notebook in front of the seniors on the first day of uni), but kawi never even speaking to him and completely ignoring his existence... while pisaeng's own mother was adamant about pisaeng staying as deep in the closet as possible because it's bad for her political ambitions to have an out gay son. she basically tells him "you can feel whatever you want to feel but telling people about it is something that you should only do with my permission".

so, pisaeng has been getting told by his mother to stay in the closet since he was 15 years old (JESUS!!!), and since his crush is obviously unrequited and hopeless, why should he risk anything by being honest about it? his family is rich, pear's family too, their marriage is one of convenience for pisaeng, who gets to keep living his good life while placating his mother and spending his life with a person he's friends with, even if he can never love her romantically. from his mother's perspective, pear and pisaeng must be a good match, and pisaeng has no real reason to fight any of it. because coming out as gay would do nothing but cause him trouble and make him unhappy.

but in the new timeline, kawi is there as pisaeng's friend. and pisaeng falls for him so much deeper than he ever could have done in the og timeline. and now he HAS to figure himself out, HAS to confront his own queerness, not for kawi or even with kawi (utterly brilliant choice in the last episode to have pisaeng go on this journey alone!) but for himself, because it is becoming clear that he is living a lie and that he can't go on like this. having kawi in his life changes everything for pisaeng -- even if they weren't in a bl and were simply friends, this storyline would still be incredibly compelling because even while they're not in a relationship, kawi and pisaeng keep challenging each other, keep changing each other, keep making each other better, more honest people.

when they're in bed together and kawi asks why pisaeng likes him, he says much of the same stuff he's said before: that pisaeng is better, richer, more handsome than him, that he can't understand what pisaeng sees in him. but he says it differently this time, not with anger or defiance like in the beginning of their friendship, but so honestly, he's able to open up to pisaeng in a way he never could before just because he has had pisaeng in his life and they have had an impact on each other.

i keep coming back to this because it's something i rarely see in stories and bmf is doing it AMAZINGLY. both of the protagonists go on a journey of growth and self-improvement through knowing each other, they literally make each other better. and even though kawi is not at a point where he can see them as equals, he can honestly talk about this now, can voice his feelings of insecurity in a way he was never able to before -- and so, pisaeng can say, well, i think you're cute, does there have to be anything more to it than that? he doesn't try to talk kawi out of his self-perception, merely states his own perception of him in a way kawi can't argue away. i think this is a smart writing choice because kawi has to accept that pisaeng finds him cute, he can't say "no you don't" without accusing him of lying.

and oh, my baby kawi being so incredibly deep in denial is tugging at my heartstrings. there's a very interesting parallel happening with kawi's singing, something he was obviously dreaming of as a career when he was a child but completely gave up on -- until pisaeng and pear helped him gain confidence to put himself out there once again. i think something very similar is happening with his sexuality: he has shoved the truth of himself so far back in his own mind that it takes a long time and the knowledge that pisaeng is into him for kawi to even entertain the thought of maybe also being into him maybe. there's a certain safety in that, just like there's safety in having pear there while he reads his song lyrics to a room full of people. and that's not a bad thing! this show has consistently shown (and outright told) us that people need to help each other, that literally no one is capable of making it on their own, that everyone deserves love and support. and kawi needs a lot of love and support to be able to even let himself think of pisaeng in romantic terms. i am seriously excited to see what happens next, now that kawi has crossed the line between them, now that he got a taste of what he could have if only he let himself.

there are probably a million things i haven't said that i can't think of right now. but every single episode leaves me more impressed than the last, the story is written SO well and presented in such a smart way, later revelations recontextualizing things we already know, and with every week, everything makes more and more sense. and learning more about their families really explains a lot about all three of them (god, i haven't even mentioned pear's rich upper-class alcoholic father, a lot to unpack there as well!), and how they got where they were in the og timeline as well as in the current timeline.

thanks for reading 😘

#be my favorite #be my favorite the series #*mine

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lurkingshan · 8 months

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Only Friends and Engaging with Queer Male Media as a Cishet Woman

I’ve had some good conversations this week with friends as we’ve been unpacking our early reactions to Only Friends, which has only just begun getting into the messy dynamics we know the show is going to explore. One of the things that has come up in conversation is our different reactions to the scene between Boston and Top in the shower stall, and how we each read that in terms of consent, sexual coercion, and what it says about each of the characters. Some of us were relatively unfazed by the scene, finding it to be a fairly realistic depiction of a pushy aggressor and his conquest who is not that into him, but also not really opposed to getting sex anywhere and any way he can. Some were more uncomfortable, recognizing behaviors we might call assault in other contexts and wondering whether we should be condemning the character or the scene for the behavior depicted.

For me, this discussion brought up a lot of my previous fandom experiences, taking me all the way back to ye olden days when Queer as Folk (US) was airing and the majority cishet woman fandom spaces were scandalized, scandalized I tell you, by some of the aspects of gay male culture it depicted. It was not the first or the last show to do so, but it stands out in my mind as an important cultural moment at the turn of century as I was coming of age, when the internet was booming and the proliferation of online fandom spaces was rapidly accelerating. Because QaF did it all—casual sex, cruising, group sex, very public acts of indecency, aggressive boundary pushing and peacocking, open and polyamorous relationships, cheating and betrayal, age gaps—and it depicted it all quite explicitly, which made a lot of people uncomfortable. Especially women who were used to thinking about sex and relationships through two primary, and heavily socialized, lenses:

heteronormative romance, and

heterosexual rape culture.

Let’s take a moment to unpack those terms. Heteronormative romance is a big, broad term that I’m using as a kind of container for a lot of things, including patriarchal structures, misogyny, rigid gender roles, purity myths and fetishization of virginity, courtship rituals, promiscuity and respectability politics, the madonna/whore complex, sex as an act primarily for breeding and procreation, expectations of sublimating sexual desire in service of caretaking for others, and so on. Basically, all the bullshit cis women get jammed into our heads from birth that gives us so many hang ups about sex and love. With heterosexual rape culture, I am referring to the undeniable culture of sexual violence women also endure in a majority heterosexual society, in which we are in constant danger of having our boundaries transgressed, being physically and psychologically hurt, and then being told it doesn’t matter because our personhood has always been in question and never mattered as much as any one man’s power or pleasure. I’m not going to drop a bunch of citations for the above because this is tumblr and I have escaped the icy grip of graduate school, but if any of these ideas are unfamiliar to you, google is your pal (and please read about intersectionality as it relates to these concepts while you’re at it, because there are layers of identity that make these dangers worse for some, like our trans and BIPOC sisters, and all of this is undergirded, as ever, by white supremacy).

So, yes, engaging with media about sex is fraught for women, especially when that media does not conform to our heteronormative ideas of morality that have been shaped by all of the above, and particularly when we as individuals have not done the work to unpack and interrogate our socialized beliefs, which is often the case for cishet women especially. Many of us instinctively cringe away from unromantic depictions of sex. Many of us can’t stand cheating and betrayal in our love stories. Many of us shy away from media that depicts the unfortunate reality of grey and dubious consent. All of that is valid, to an extent, and rooted in the way we have been taught to think about this stuff from birth, and the ways we’ve had to adapt to survive.

But, here’s the thing, girlies: most of those socialized hang ups I just talked about? Do not apply to a story by, for, and about queer men.

Before you start yelling, here is your disclaimer: of course patriarchy and misogyny also hurt men. Of course rape culture also exists in queer communities, and of course some queer people engage in heterosexual sex, so these are not mutually exclusive categories of people. And, importantly, cishet women are not the only ones who struggle with these tensions—just the ones who are most relevant to this particular post.

So, after that long and winding road, back to the point: this debate about the bathroom scene in Only Friends is the same shit that’s been debated in majority female fandoms around depictions of queer male sex since time immemorial. And whatever your personal feelings are on that scene, or the no doubt numerous other depictions of questionable romantic and sexual etiquette and dubious consent coming our way in this show, what it boils down to is this: can a majority cis woman fandom step outside of our own conception of sexual morality to engage with this show not with judgment, but with curiosity about what sex and relationships look like for queer men? This show has an entirely queer male writing and directing team. It is made with love by people of the community, for the community. They know what they’re about, they have resumes demonstrating they are damn good storytellers who understand safe sex, consent, sexual health, and sex work, and they are here to tell us a story grounded in their reality. BL has been moving in fits and starts toward depictions of sex that are more honest about queer male experiences, and Only Friends, spearheaded by the Jojo Tichakorn Phukhaotong (who demonstrated quite ably that he has a firm grasp on consent, sexual assault, and the damage that dubious consent can cause in The Warp Effect), is the next step in that evolution. The key point is that sexual activity simply does not mean the same thing or carry the same associations and hang ups for queer men as it does for cis women. With that in mind, can we try our best to process and critique this story on their terms, instead of our own?

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Only Friends is not going to be a good time for people who are looking for romantic depictions of relationships and sex or invested in identifying heroes and villains amongst this cast of characters. This show is about deeply flawed people hurting each other, rooted in the lived experience of the Thai queer male community—and those of us who do not share all of those lived experiences may not understand the nuances of every single thing that is happening. We can be sure that the characters will all be wrong sometimes and they will all do things we think are stupid or reckless or unkind. Does that mean we can’t have empathy for them? Do they have to act in a way we think is morally “correct” in order to love them? You don’t have to be comfortable with the things these characters do, and it’s certainly valid to point out when you think lines have been crossed. But attempting to sort them into “good” and “bad” camps is pointless, and moralistic judgment of their behavior is out of place, particularly when it comes from a place of trying to force them into our own irrelevant frameworks for sexual politics.

And with all that said, I am passing the baton over to my dear friend @waitmyturtles, because there’s an entire aspect of the intersectional cultures at play here that I have barely touched on—Only Friends as an Asian queer story that is building from a specific lineage of Thai queer media. I’m gonna let her take the mic for that part, and say thanks to her, @bengiyo, @neuroticbookworm and @wen-kexing-apologist for reading this over and helping me think through what I wanted to say here, and shoutout to @williamrikers whose post I also linked to above.

#only friends the series #only friends #ofts #thai bl #shan shouts into the void

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hero-israel · 5 months

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The "Left" has been braying about fascism for years and yet, and YET, I know none of them have even skimmed a single sentence of Ur-Fascism by Umberto Eco. If you've read it, you'll immediately start saying "Oh that's Hamas!" at basically every point he made.

Hamas has used some of the most conservative and harsh readings of Islamic theology to create a cult of tradition, they fundamentally reject modernity as an evil plague of the West, they call on Palestinians to "resist" and "struggle" and plan grandiose attacks like 10/7 with no real concrete long term tenable goals that can be gleaned- action for action's sake.

Disagreement is treason, that much is obvious. Children in preschool are taught to fear and hate Jews (fear of difference), and at the same time teach the "middle" classes that Jews are responsible for their economic hardship as if they aren't embezzling tens of millions of dollars from a global charity scam, that Jews are ever seeking to take more land and resources.

Hamas is obsessed with a Plot, that plot being every antisemitic conspiracy theory under the sun. They and their supporters believe all of them, or prime their own brains to stumble down those pipelines at a later date. My personal favorites include the Ben Gurion Canal Project, but they're all sub-plots of the Main Plot; Jews are seeking to supplant us.

Hamas frames themselves and Palestinian society as a whole as both too strong to consider humble negotiated peace, and to justify endless warfare, but also too weak to be responsible for their crimes, too pathetic for Israel to ever be justified in taking military action. It's a constant cycle of hyping themselves up as a group of badass radical warriors and then squealing "no fair" when Israel uses modern weaponry to swat them away.

I'm sure there's also contempt for the weak in Gazan society, but it doesn't immediately jump out at me from Hamas' propaganda machine (this is usually shunted onto Jews anyway, who are seen as effeminate and metropolitan, feeding into that simultaneous strength and weakness thing- Israel is weak and unworthy of life, but too powerful they're the bullies actually).

Hamas literally educates everyone to become a hero, they literally groom young boys into becoming radicalized child soldiers who do not have the frontal cortex development to resist such blatant brainwashing. It's literal child abuse. Palestinian women are pretty obviously seen as chattel who must breed the future army that will finally overwhelm Al-Yahood. There is no aspect of Gazan society that can exist for itself, it must all be part of the Struggle against Israel. And everyone, down to the tiniest baby, must play their part.

The Machismo is so blatant it should be comical. But you don't gang rape Jewish women and humiliate and torture kids if you're secure in your masculinity. I mean, there is something emasculating about being constantly beaten and seeming to have no hope for your political goals... while also constantly telling yourself that you're a proud virile warrior and you and the People have the strength of will to accomplish anything... but then these people you see as subhuman and like kind of queer if you think about it... well they utterly crush you every time. And that is all to say nothing about how Hamas relates to feminism and gay rights. And also how Eco describes the Macho Fascist as using weapons as an ersatz phallic symbol and we see so many teenage boys in Gaza being handed guns and it's like oh... this one section of the essay could take years to unpack when it comes to Hamas.

And Hamas definitely treats the people of Gaza (if not all of Palestine) as having one will and one voice, individuality is not considered. We've seen them and their spineless NGO simps refuse to acknowledge that many many Gazans criticize them, protest against them, hold them equally responsible for their current suffering as Israel. There is no One Singular Leader who claims to represent Gazans/Palestinians but that could change at any moment honestly.

And I don't see any evidence of Newspeak, but I don't know Arabic so I don't know. I do see the Western Leftist allies of Hamas engage in Newspeak like behaviors though. But that brings me to my ultimate point of this long ass ask. The Western Hamas girlies are literally, not only legitimizing a fascist organization even though they purport to hate fascism more than anything. They're starting to reproduce fascist talking points, fascist ways of thinking, in their own activism and their own lives! They're starting to think, talk, and act like fascists when it comes to Israel and Palestine, and to Jews more broadly. They're entirely unaware of this because to recognize Hamas as fascists would be to add a LOT of gray into their black and white worldview. When they appropriate the Palestinian national struggle for their own narcissistic delusions of popular revolution in the West, they're taking actual fascist propaganda produced by a fascist organization and applying it to their own lives.

tl;dr, by every metric laid out by Eco, Hamas are fascists, the people who support them and make apologetics for them are (maybe unknowingly) becoming more like fascists themselves, the next few years and decades are going to thoroughly suck but Am Yisrael Chai.

#Hamas #umberto eco #Palestine #Gaza #fascism #leftist antisemitism #ur-fascism

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bengiyo · 3 months

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She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat 2 Eps 5-8 Stray Thoughts

Last week, we returned to my favorite ladies. They realized they were spending too much on their hangouts, so made the silly decision to just stop hanging out. That broke fairly quickly at least and they just started having more cost-effective meals together. Nomoto got a full time position along with her work bestie, and they're thriving. Nomoto watched her first lesbian film, and has made an internet friend. Kasuga noticed their new neighbor, and so they have begun the process of befriending her.

Episode 5

Very glad both of my favorite food shows with LGBT couples are wading directly into the importance of marriage equality.

Fuck yes we're getting back to the cabbage rolls!

YES!! A WATCH PARTY!!! Invite Kasuga!!

Kasuga is so careful with Nagumo. I'm not sure I'm reading exactly how determined each of them is being about being polite as Kasuga tries to be helpful.

Oh, Nagumo, I hope you find a way to be comfortable eating with them eventually.

Now, Nomoto, you were so close to telling her. Come on!

These cabbage rolls look good. I hadn't thought about putting them in a soup.

Yes, stay focused on Nagumo! We must befriend her!

Episode 6

I like introducing a character who struggles with eating with others into this show. I'm relieved it's only about eating in front of strangers.

That was an incredible eye roll from Kasuga to the message from her aunt.

Kasuga overhearing older women unpack their disdain for the caregiver expectation placed on them them is a good choice.

An asexual lesbian who wants to watch her stories with others. She is one of us. This is the gay sex and celibacy website z after all.

I like Yaku! She was warm to Nomoto, asked a good question about snacks. Admitted she doesn't like cooking in a way that doesn't make Nomoto's hobby seem bad. Then they enjoyed a film together.

Yaku is great. She's letting Nomoto lead here, and giving her encouragement to continue sharing.

Come through, Yaku! There is room for all types of lesbians! Quiet gays who maybe don't want to have a ton of sex can sit with us too!

"Are we in a drama?" Yes, Yaku, and you are the cool, self-actualized queer.

I'm glad Nomoto can share! This will definitely help her get out of her own head.

Episode 7

Oh, is her name Yako? I will start using that spelling.

Sayama, thank you for trying to help your friend confess to her crush, but she is determined for this to be a slow burn show.

Kasuga backs in to park She's better than all of us.

This conversation is ugly. The dad doesn't think he or the eldest son should do anything to help with elder care, but Kasuga should give up her entire life to take care of people who disrespect her. I can see why she's avoided them for this long.

I'm glad we already knew that Kasuga was not given enough to eat in the first season, so this is all reaffirming it and letting us examine the long term impacts.

They're all sharing on the balcony!

They're making donuts together!!!

Nagumo seems like she had a good time, and they're encouraging her to eat some on her own.

Childhood trauma episode, I see.

Nomoto and Kasuga have so much grace for Nagumo. They let her share about herself, asked her how they can best support her, and Nomoto even encouraged Kasuga to take some donuts home so Nagumo isn't the only one leaving with food.

Episode 8

SAYAMA GETS DONUTS TOO! I love this show!!!

Wow, this conversation between Kasuga and Ms. Fujita hit me. The seriousness with which she stressed to Kasuga not to give up her life for her parents landed so hard. This is complicated for me, because I've accepted that my role as the oldest will be that of caregiver in the future.

They turned her room into a storage space and still just expect her to clean it up. I'm glad she put her foot down here. I do believe in giving back the love and care we've received to our parents when they get older, but you are giving back what was given to you. Kasuga is right to not want to spend her adulthood as a household servant to an ungrateful man and his mother.

Wow, this Chosen Family scene took me right the fuck out.

Nomoto is correct. I will also not forgive Kasuga's father for making her feel like this.

She almost said it! We're getting close!

I'm so glad we're expanding the cast this season to deal with more issues affecting Japanese women. I really like that they spent two episodes on Kasuga deciding that the family she's building here is more important to her than the family that mistreated her. I'm so happy that Nomoto has another lesbian friend to talk to. I'm so relieved that Nagumo is opening up to them and starting to share in the warmth our ladies have offered her. I will be thinking about that donut scene for a while. I'm so happy that we have so much more time with them this season.

#Ben watches #she loves to cook and she loves to eat #tsukuritai onna to tabetai onna #japanese gl #gl series

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peridyke · 22 days

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ok I'm still kinda waking up and I'm a little groggy so I hope I get this concept across but sometimes I feel like some tme lesbians can be kinda...disingenuous about transmisogyny among lesbians and in lesbian culture? a lot of the time people have a very kneejerk reaction to any associations of lesbians with terfs WHICH IS FAIR I have seen some people say some really lesbophobic things where they just blatantly say all lesbians as terfs or associated with terfs etc which I think is unfair and ironically ignores the presence of trans lesbians BUT!!!!! I also think like its pretty obvious that there's a lot of stuff that people need to unpack if they want to actually be safe for trans women. I don't think I need to tell anyone that there's a really big and politicized focus on lesbians' genital preferences specifically excluding penises and a huge focus on how much lesbians are supposed to be crazy for pwussyy and like yeah obviously gay guys get a similar thing with people saying how much they have to love dick exclusively but with lesbians preferences are waaaaaay more politicized and a lesbian's lack of intimacy with someone who has a penis is supposed to be this hugely political defining part of our sexualities that symbolize how we are like. I don't fuckin know free from the shackles of patriarchy or some bs like that. its hard for me to put into words really but there are so many little things in lesbian culture that are casually trans exclusionary or transmisogynistic and it just all adds up and ends up hurting girls who are already really vulnerable. I don't like how much lesbians are told that we have to have this innate violent disgusted reaction to a part of someone's anatomy or that our lack of interest in men is supposed to mean something grander than just a preference in who we want intimacy from. and I think a lot of the time tme lesbians will still hold and repeat these beliefs to varying extends and then just quickly tack on a comment about how trans women are women without unpacking their deeper biases. a lot of second wave lesbian feminism really focused on this association of lesbianism with grander political idea of "women who are free from the shackles of males" and if we are going to reminisce on that part of queer history we need to recognize its biases and grow from them rather than pretend that these concepts existed in a vacuum that never inherently excluded and hurt trans girls. how lesbianism connects to patriarchy and the unique misogyny and violence we will face because of that is something that needs to be discussed but that discussion must always include the experiences of trans lesbians too not just as a disclaimer at the end of an essay that is blatantly only talking about the cisgender/tme lesbian experience but as something fully integrated and understood as an unquestioned part of our history and community. there have always been trans girls who have been lesbians and there have always been tme lesbians who date and love and fuck trans girls and people need to stop acting like thats a development from the last ten years and that lesbianism and its culture has only ever been defined and pioneered by people who were afab

#txt #im sure there are people who would take this in bad faith but i dont caaaaare love and peace baby ✌#dont @ me unless you want to tell me how smart and cool and sexy and attractive i am #i dont wanna hear about anyones psychological hangups about trans girls save it for ur therapist lawl #also disclaimer but i am not transfem in case anyone didnt know

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djuvlipen · 7 months

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Queer politics emerged in a very different political climate. In the late 1980s and early 1990s neoliberalism was at its unchallenged height. The 1990s was the time of TINA, There Is No Alternative’, the famous phrase of Margaret Thatcher. This was a time when deregulated rogue capitalism was allowed to appropriate the resources of the world and destroy the conditions of workers from the USA to Australia. It was a time when the feminist and anti-racist policies that had been adopted by education authorities and universities in the UK and the USA were being denounced as ‘political correctness’. The term ‘politically correct’ was a term of abuse used automatically and unthinkingly by many, whenever challenges were raised to practices which entrenched the rights and interests of rich white men. This was not an auspicious time for the creation of a radical politics, and indeed queer politics incorporated the contemporary biliousness to wards ‘political correctness’, and demonstrated the ways in which gay politics had capitulated to the economic imperatives of the time.

Sheila Jeffreys, Unpacking Queer Politics

#ref #Sheila Jeffreys #Unpacking Queer Politics #postmodernism #liberalism

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spacelazarwolf · 9 months

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yeah i was reading the aro manifesto and i massively agree with the point that it sounds like political lesbianism, to the point where i kinda wonder if it isn’t like, a very similar thing (ie, political lesbianism is majority straight women, is this just political aromanticism).

obviously it very much could be someone who is actually aro (because the aro community does have a real problem with harmful romance-negativity), but the phrase “We propose aromanticism” seems like such a deeply strange thing to say, because it frames being aro as a choice and kinda implies that the writer did “choose to be aro” (which most aros know it very much isn’t a choice)

but again, i could just be reading too much into weird wording, and i don’t want to act like this attitude could never come up in aro communities (because it can and does)

either way thank you for unpacking it because it’s complete horseshit and it pissed me off so much when i read it

which is interesting bc in one of their posts when someone mentions that it sounds like political lesbianism they went “oh no it’s not that!!!! it’s more like poc queer liberation something something!!!!!” like i’m sorry but ur queer theory is literally copy pasted from political lesbianism but somehow even dumber.

#ask avishai

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rthko · 1 year

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Anon, while I appreciate your clarification, your message still includes subjective and unsupported claims that paint me in a negative light. I hope you understand I know better than to publish my own callout post. I cannot be everything for everyone. I am not a celebrity with a PR team but a person with my own experiences and a job who blogs in my free time. If I blog about what's familiar to me, I'm centering myself and maliciously excluding others. Yet if I blog about experiences I'm not familiar with, I'm stepping out of my lane and trying to speak for others. If every word written about identity and overcoming prejudice has to be perfect, then the only way to win is to not talk about it at all.

Recently, I have blogged about the overlap in experiences between cis or marginally cis queer people and trans people. I am interested in establishing common ground and bonding, even organizing over it. That said, in a culture of "LGB alliance," I realize the responsibility of reconciliation falls moreso on cis people. I am cis. Yes, my own weird version of it, but cis. Cis enough to know that when ghouls in Congress and on TV talk about "gender ideology," they don't have me in mind. All my trans friends are terrified right now, but my cis gay friends are only afraid if they've specifically decided to tune into the news. The ability to turn off the news and ignore it is a privilege. There is a social utility in unpacking these invisible knapsacks.

I also believe that online "check your privilege" culture is often hollow and self serving. When I posted a joke roast of Taylor Swift, I was flooded with comments decrying me as a "cis white gay," embellished with remarks about how I'm probably ignorant, sex-obsessed and disease-ridden. Nevermind the fact that Taylor Swift is herself a cis straight white woman and that cis white gays make up her most loyal following (and presumably many of the comments lobbed in my direction). This is one of many examples where it's not about identity politics at all, except to embellish and connote moral superiority. I believe cis white gay men do hold privilege in many ways--look no further than how HIV was considered "over" once it went from being seen as a "gay disease" to a "black disease," or how so many of us look the other way in this current transphobic climate. But what, for instance, does Taylor Swift have to do with any of this?

That is one problem with privilege discourse, but also, it's oversimplified. Checking my privilege is a mathematical equation. Cis plus man minus gay. There is no convenient formula that accounts for the fact that I have never been welcome among men or treated as "one of the boys," that I had to find my own self worth outside of their inclusion. It doesn't account for the fact that "cis" is the approximate conclusion I reached after countless clandestine name and pronoun changes in forums and group chats, "what if I had just been born a girl" questions, and anger at the expectation to be a "real man" or a "man" at all. And I just don't have this explanation in my back pocket all the time.

I woke up this morning, checked my inbox, and was informed that there's a callout post going around about me. Something to do with problematic daddy kinks and my "fuck that old man" shitposts. Whatever. I found it funny. What stood out to me is that a popular blogger who to my knowledge has never posted about any of that was roped into it just for reblogging from me. She was considered guilty by association with me, and my perceived guilt was at best subjective and at worst prejudiced. So maybe I'm on the defensive today. Maybe this is my Lana Del Rey "question for the culture" meltdown. But if you want to dive into my psyche and help me to "do better," talk to me like a person and not a public figure.

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impunkster-syndrome · 9 months

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The time has come for that goddamn stochastic terrorism post and how radqueer beliefs remind me of it.

Background that is important to understanding me and why these two things are similar to me:

I was groomed into the alt-right pipeline at eleven years old up until I was 18. Someone in my life to this day took advantage of my trauma and groomed me into political views as a child to weaponize me against my liberal rapist. I'm still having to unpack the trauma of that experience and how that harmed me, as well as often facing abuse now for being a leftist. I knew all the big names at the time and looked up to them as heroes, and was encouraged. Hell, I've been on 4chan and luckily got out of that after realizing I was queer/my complete split from the original and deconverting from fundamentalist christianity.

What is "stochastic terrorism"?

Here's a video on PewDiePie and the pipeline his content creates to the alt-right and fascism, that has a section on it:

youtube

If you aren't going to watch it:

Stochastic terrorism is a form of terrorism that does not have a singular figurehead but instead relies on peer radicalization to move a person through the pipeline by making ideas gradually more acceptable due to a lack of direct calls to violence. It's pretty much the "long game" type of terrorism- radicalization over a longer period of time through communities that often believe themselves to be "just trolling." There are no direct orders for calls to action, which allows plausible deniability for stochastic terrorists not one person to be personally at fault and unable to be blamed for encouraging someone to go farther in the pipeline.

The pipeline itself is one that furthers someone up the levels of the pyramid of violence. (The video has more of a person-focused pyramid diagram, while the one below mentions systemic discrimination.)

[Image ID: An image of the ADL's Pyramid of Hate diagram on a white background. The blue text above a blue horizontal divider read:

"ADL Pyramid of Hate"

The text beneath the divider reads:

"The Pyramid of Hate illustrates the prevalence of bias, hate and oppression in our society. It is organized in escalating levels of attitudes and behavior that grow in complexity from bottom to top. Like a pyramid, the upper levels are supported by the lower levels; unlike a pyramid, the levels are not built consecutively or to demonstrate a ranking of each level. Bias at each level reflects a system of oppression that negatively impacts individuals, institutions and society. Unchecked bias can become “normalized” and contribute to a pattern of accepting discrimination, violence and injustice in society. While every biased attitude or act does not lead to genocide, genocide takes place within a system of oppression in which the attitudes and actions described at the lower levels of the pyramid are accepted. When we challenge those biased attitudes and behaviors in ourselves, others and institutions, we can interrupt the escalation of bias and make it more difficult for discrimination and hate to flourish."

Below that text is a diagram of a pyramid with five ascending sections. The base level of the pyramid is purple, and reads:

"Biased Attitudes"

To the right of the pyramid is text that explains that level, which reads:

"Stereotyping, Fear of differences, Justifying biases by seeking out like-minded people, Seeking out information to confirm one’s existing beliefs and/or biases, Lack of self-reflection or awareness of privilege"

The next level up is blue and reads:

"Acts of Bias"

The text to the right for this level reads:

"Non-inclusive language, Insensitive remarks, Microaggressions, Biased and belittling jokes, Cultural appropriation, Social avoidance and/or exclusion, Name-calling, Ridicule, Bullying, Slurs and epithets, Dehumanization"

The next level up is green and reads:

"Systemic Discrimination"

The text to the right reads:

"Criminal justice disparities, Inequitable school resource distribution, Housing segregation, Inequitable employment opportunities, Wage disparities, Voter restrictions and suppression, Unequal media representation"

The next level up is orange, and reads:

"Bias-Motivated Violence"

The text to the right reads:

"Threats, Desecration, Vandalism, Arson, Assault, Rape, Murder, Terrorism"

The last level at the top is red, and reads:

"Genocide"

The text to the right reads:

"The act or intent to deliberately and systematically annihilate an entire people"

End ID.]

The ADL (Anti-Defamation League, for those who may not know) has a lesson on this pyramid at the link below.

The whole point of stochastic terrorism is to gradually get people from one level to the next up, and unless stopped, it can end in genocide and people who support it without any verbal calls to action.

Right now, some very important radqueer traits heavily remind me of my alt-right days, and specifically make me think of how dangerous this can be for anyone, not just minors.

From what I see, radqueers are on the second level of the pyramid, and do contribute to the third level with their treatment of minorities that try to intercept them and pull them out of the pipeline by telling them that their behavior is harmful to minorities.

Part the first- Term hijacking and theft:

Want to know what?

"Trans-Nazi" is not a radqueer term. It's been used in 2012- over an entire decade ago. Neither is "transnazi" as a term either. That comes from 4chan.

I found it here while looking for a tumblr coining post, thinking it was a new term:

This post? Written by a transwoman and the "Trans-Nazis" are described as not respecting transgender people who do not pass or have not had surgery at an event in 2004 for trans people. It's not updated terminology, since the people described would be considered transmeds today. I emailed the writer for more information, and was told that she did not coin the term, but it used to be used in the 2010s to describe anyone who was not transgender in a way the "trans-nazi" did not approve of.

Here's the 2016 use:

Just as a warning, it's 2016 4chan. Transphobia, queerphobia, using otherkin people to discredit queer identities, attack helicopter-type unfunny jokes, slurs, dick photos, and antisemitism await you behind that link. The absence of straight up porn and sexualized minor character artwork is an anomaly.

Here's the important comment on that page to save you the scrolling and triggering (Except antisemitism, unfortunately since I cannot spoiler things in the middle of this post):

"I sexually identify as a transnazi and this thread needs to be put in a gas chamber."

This is a use of the term before radqueers got a chance to "coin" it- and it is directly used to be antisemitic and queerphobic. I actually remember seeing this thread and laughing because at the time I was an alt-right fuckwad bigot. I didn't write that, but I remember that thread.

The current use of "transnazi" by radqueers is in line with that of transphobes, queerphobes, racists, sexists, and antisemites that will not hesitate to kill them if they do not fully commit to being a nazi in one exact way. There is no way to separate where this term came from with that of a radqueer's use of it. Both are in support of nazis, and no list of reasons will ever be good enough to make identifying as a fascist valid. (Yes, I am aware of this bullshit. I technically fit a few of those in my life with the fact that I was groomed to be right-wing and in the pipeline. I have met systems with fucking Hitler fictives who are staunchly antifascist. One of my own system members has his source use a bunch of nazi imagery- and he will not turn up the chance to beat up a nazi and make fun of them. These are excuses for bigotry that fucking 4chan teens use to try to seem like they are a nazi, but only "ironically.")

We all know that transabled, transrace, and transspecies are stolen from other communities. But this example helps illustrate that many of their terms and things they support are hijacked from other spaces, for better or for worse.

How this ties into stochastic terrorism- The normalization of nazis, neo-nazis, and antisemitism that puts jewish people at risk.

"Nazi" has been a dirty word for a while. People don't like having their beliefs linked to people near-universally known to be "Those idiots that killed millions of people in a genocide targeting minorities and had generally bad ideas."

This is where language shifts are useful to bigots.

Instead of "white supremacist," you have people saying they are a "race realist" based on eugenics and racist findings rooted in bad science.

Instead of "nazi" and "fascist," you have the alt-right trying to claim that fascism is a left-leaning belief and that the nazis were so smart. (They weren't. Imagine trying to use dogs as spies without microphones or cameras and then falling for looney tunes-like tactics from the allies. They took things from other cultures to try to legitimize themselves- look at volkish shit. Former Norse pagan here, and the Norse gods would fucking hate nazis and the theft of their culture.)

The nature of shifting the language, even ironically, is to blur the definition until it becomes unrecognizable to the public and can safely radicalize someone without others being aware. People who pick it up might think it's a joke- until it isn't. Like the incels that think jokes about killing women are fine and then get suddenly greeted with members of their community acting on those jokes. It never was a joke from the start- it was a way to make the choice to act on those more desireable.

Nazis rely on this type of radicalization and terrorism because it allows them to not be personally responsible for hate crimes. So, "transnazi" is just another way for them to attempt to hide their true intentions. Anyone who uses "transnazi" is a nazi and should be treated like one.

Right now, in the US, there is an attempt to legislate transgender people out of existence. One of my friends lives in Florida, and has seen people wave nazi flags. I fear for his safety, as well as that of his partner. The nazis are very real, and are often right under our noses, trying to hide themselves. Jewish people have to live in fear of seeing apologists lick the boots of fascists.

If you're "transnazi," you will be killed the second you are no longer useful to nazis.

Edit: 12/8/23 - Replaced "thousands" with "millions" for the victims of the nazis. It's not that I wasn't aware of the correct number. I just have a very hard time conceptualizing giant numbers.

#anti radqueer #antisemitism #transnazi

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hellomynameisbisexual · 1 year

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This week, rapper Cardi B had to defend herself from a Twitter user, who accused her of being one of few “[c]elebrities that came out as bisexual but never dated someone of the same gender.” In responding to this charge, Cardi B said she’d been with women before, even revealing that she’d had a girlfriend in high school. But the fact that she had to answer to this charge with details about her life at all speaks to a culture of bisexual erasure online and offline — where claiming any kind of queer identity necessitates performance or disclosure in order to be validated. Billie Eilish is similarly subject to intense scrutiny for possibly being bi — one that is guided by expected norms that doesn’t just undermine her privacy, but further contributes to bisexual erasure by subjecting it to misplaced assumptions. A confluence of celebrity culture, internet culture, and even the history of queer struggles have ended up failing bisexual people — in ways that harms the queer community itself.

Demanding that queer people make their entire dating histories, sex lives, and preferences publicly known is a form of bi erasure — one that an internet culture bent on being vocal about identity has fostered. It implicitly implies a sense of ownership and entitlement that the general public has over bisexual people’s bodies — and joins the ranks of other ways through which bisexual women are commodified, like unicorn hunting. Remember Obama famously admitting to reading Foucault and Virginia Woolf to pick up the “ethereal bisexual”? It’s an innocuous observation but it speaks to not just a vibe that bisexual people are presumed to have, but a gaze they’re subjected to, making them objects of scrutiny and surveillance both within straight and queer communities. And in the age of social media and hypervisibility, it makes coming out as bi messy, fraught, and harmful.

The critique of Cardi B, moreover, sounds a lot like an accusation of queerbaiting, but “…there’s something off about accusing a person of queerbaiting based on how they express themselves publicly,” as The Swaddle noted earlier, about how Harry Styles was accused of queer-baiting. Incidentally, Styles was among the other celebrities called out along with Cardi B for never publicly dating someone of the same gender.

But bisexuality isn’t easily slotted into existing forms of understanding queer culture, as a whole. Contrary to perceptions that bisexual people are “both straight and gay” or are merely “experimenting,” research found that bisexual individuals have a distinct, implicit bisexual identity that’s different from how gay, lesbian, or straight people perceive and identify themselves. This means that Internet culture demanding a certain performance of queerness from queer folk homogenizes very distinct identities under the same umbrella. But Internet culture merely inherited a culture of erasure from what preceded it: a cultural struggle to define queerness and mobilize against pain, marginalization, and harm. While it became necessary to draw clear boundaries, those who complicated those lines remained sidelined not just politically, but also culturally. But this doesn’t just harm bisexual people — it undermines queerness itself.

“Unlike sexuality, that might seem to allow for clear distinctions of categorization, sex remains unruly… Unpacking queer, naming its constitutive parts and the ways these situate us in relation to social harms and privileges means being much more explicit about what, who, and why we do what we do sexually, as a way of investigating how sex functions as a regulatory force, and it means getting way more specific about what behaviors, communities, identities, and politics get subsumed, interrogated, or championed under the banner of queer,” notes gender studies scholar Juana María Rodríguez.

When we interrogate celebrities who’ve publicly already come out as bisexual, we impose sexuality as a regulatory force, demanding that they conform to a set of expected behaviors and rules, or risk being invalidated completely. By extension, anyone else who identifies as bisexual, too, is expected to conform to the same norms.

“Bisexuality is an often invisible identity. Heterosexual and homosexual communities contribute to bisexual erasure, acting in concert to protect a binary system that is complicated and disrupted by the possibility and presence of bisexuality,” notes another analysis on bisexual erasure — not only in mainstream media, but within queer communities too.

Over time, cultural anxieties around sexuality have culminated in a situation where a person is either presumed heterosexual, or homosexual, based on their overt behaviors and signifiers. “Bisexuals in relationships often blend into the sexual orientation dictated by that relationship, rather than retaining their status as bisexuals,” the study had noted. And this is the assumption implicit in social media call-outs of celebrities: if they’ve only been seen dating the “opposite” gender (itself a misnomer), they must be straight — and, of course, lying. But the argument goes the other way too: when celebrities signify queerness, they’re accused of straight-passing, or accessing the privilege of heterosexuality.

Scholars have noted that the insistence on maintaining the heterosexual-homosexual binary in this way is a social construct — if bisexual people aren’t visible, it’s not for a lack of numbers. Kenji Yoshino observed that an “epistemic contract” between people who are straight and gay ensures that sexual orientation remains a stable category, sex is still an axis of identity, and monogamy is upheld. The existence of bisexuality threatens all three assumptions, making its erasure in popular culture one that’s designed to maintain the status quo.

As a result, bisexual people become an easy target for accusations of “fence-sitting” or “duplicity” by straight and gay people, both. “[Q]ueer identity politics has necessarily involved constructing definitions of queer identities whose content is characterized by the reversal of constructions of heterosexuality. While this has facilitated coherence among queers, and an oppositional stance toward heterosexism, it has also had the effect of closing off certain avenues of inquiry into queer sexuality,” notes scholar Stacy Young.

More troublingly, it speaks to a larger culture of disbelief around bisexual people’s experiences — and their own articulation of truth. “In publicly avowing one’s gender identity (or, on my view, their sexual orientation), they are staking a social claim — they are authorizing how they want to be seen and treated in the social domain… it is an ethical matter that bi-identified people and others have the ability to determine and disclose (or not) their sexual orientation. Being denied this constitutes a violation in a morally significant way, insofar as it amounts to a violation of autonomy, and a violation of their ability to determine how their sexuality will be understood in the social realm,” writes Heather Stewart, cutting to the heart of what makes bisexual erasure so harmful.

It not only disavows the truth of what an individual chooses to disclose — it also actively demands a performance that may not conform to their identity, and sacrifices privacy to “prove” the validity of their speech.

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hochulia · 1 year

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Offtop from art posting

Yesterday I was reading my fav channel about lesbian and queer relationships (it’s be awesome blogger Sasha Kazantseva, google her). And there was a really good post about how to communicate and understand a person with unusual trans identity. Very educational. But in the comments terfs showed up and somehow find a reason to rage.

One of them posted this familiar long rant, how “gender ideology” is the reason why women oppressed and also “why the f we have to respect anyone’s pronouns/genders!!!” And I noticed how f-ing ridiculous this shit is and the fact they justify it by women’s rights is appalling.

I remember in 2016 I was still empathetic person, though that the most important thing is be your true self and was shocked when read the article about trans women in russia and how they have to survive. I f-ing didn’t know that the “gender ideology” was the root of all evil in the world until I found a very charismatic terf who lured people in her circle with based takes about feminism. Claiming she’s a radical feminist, she wrote really good things and added transphobia, racism and justification of child abuse here and there (yes she said it’s ok for women to beat and torture kids, because women is oppressed class). And I even wasn’t agree with most of her fash crap, but she helped me in awful times in my life, so I was willing to turn a blind eye. And yeah, was introduced to a new target for my rage, scary maniacs in womens clothes, whose only goal is to rape every child and woman in the toilets or locker rooms 🤡

So. Saying gender ideology is the reason of women’s oppression is so fucking funny, like read history books idk?? And if anything women’s rights are more protected in countries where trans rights are recognized. She also added, that trans persons reproduce stereotypes about women and women are hated for being feminine and if women weren’t feminine there would be no reason to hate. There’s a lot to unpack here, but this is so misogynistic. I loved being a girl since childhood, I always thought girls are cooler, and I consider myself a very feminine person even if I look super neutral or even masculine on the surface. 😮‍💨

And. The whining about people wanting to their identities/boundaries etc be respected, putting your “opinion” over people’s well-being is so immature and also fascist. Are you f-ing don’t know about basic human decency and politeness?? Try to learn how to live in civilized society maybe?? No one f-ing ask your shitty opinion about anyone’s body/face/gender/name/health etc, your shitty opinion have no value on this subjects, keep it to yourself.

And how they reduce even cis women’s for their flat definitions of women or sexuality. I of course share the experience of oppression with many cis women, there’s a lot of common things, and they influenced my life and personality. Yet I am unique human being, I have my own femininity, my own sexuality, my own mind. Seeing how she writes about women as a homogeneous mass and sexuality as a simple matter is so f-ing funny. Sis, I’m a living proof you’re wrong, so is any other person, there’s a whole world outside of your head of you didn’t knew.

Tl;dr I guess. To any gender critical feminist who fights scary gender ideology and trans people everyday, solution to your problems is to close your socials, put down your phone and go outside. Or play MH Stories 2, or stardew valley. Or meet your friends. And see a therapist. When you remember how to live a life you will save yourself from monsters in your head, amazing right? 😸

#trans rights #gender critical #terfs #antifascism #antiterf

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