impunkster-syndrome

[impunkster-syndrome]

The more I think about it, the more I think that my ex is just a shitty person. No wonder I felt trapped. I do find it really suspicious that an 18 year old we both knew seems to have followed them in blocking me on everything without warning. That's really similar to how our relationship started. All I can do is hope that kid is okay.

#blackbox thoughts

[impunkster-syndrome]

IP address threats don't work on someone who knows how IP addresses work. The threat of doxxing I got with somehow my IP matching the people who keep interacting with punisheddonjuan is probably tumblr's IP servers. I'm not sending him shit. I don't want anyone else to either. But all his buddies apparently think every interaction is me like a grand conspiracy theory. Sending all proof I can to tumblr staff.

#blackbox thoughts

[impunkster-syndrome]

This blog is going on indefinite hatius. What Mod Cinema had done is so entirely counter to how this blog is supposed to work, I couldn't believe they had done it at first. They should have controlled their impulses better.

Here is what happened, for the full situation:

A user has their (Pronouns switched for anonymity) post reblogged by Mod Kiko.

I respond to the ask to say that I will not take people sending direct hate to my staff, and mention that I had a seizure from the reblogged post's content. I did so with the intent of making it clear that real people are impacted by inaccessibility.

Some time later, I find that the user has screenshot all contact blogs of moderators to publicly shame them and claim harassment over one reblog, citing they feel publicly shamed. The user pedojackets me specifically, which is more of a problem to me than any other claims made aside from having been the one to escalate. I can be annoyed by the DID and RAMCOA ableism, but that's relatively small compared to pedojacketing often being a tactic to garner support for violence and harassment towards another.

I and my staff choose to take time to pause the queue and allow this to blow over. Our plan is to just let it pass and continue on as normal. I answer an ask to explain why we are going on hatius.

I spend the majority of the day offline due to a festival, and recieve threatening messages from another user. During this time, people have been interacting with the initial user on anon, and I am not aware of this or his repeated screenshotting of this account.

Mod Cinema, acting independently, tells me that they signed the user's email up for spam newsletters. I thought they were joking at first due to how obviously bad of an idea it is, and can't do anything due to poor reception and being offline for hours. When I get Mod Kiko telling me that someone had done the same, it clicks that they were not joking. I remove them from staff immediately and have them own up to their actions publicly. No one on staff even mentioned this at all in our plan due to it being harassment. It lead to our breakup on the same day.

What I will say is that the user is not to be solely to blame for Mod Cinema deleting their account. The initial harassment is one part, however, they did delete other private blogs we were aware of due to the breakup. They are still on tumblr and have cut all contact with me after breaking up. They run from the consequences of their actions often.

I'm the purple, Mod Cinema is the teal.

Reblogs and interacting once is not harassment like the user claims. However, what my ex did was harassment. It is entirely counter to what this blog was made for, and they know this. They have seen me work on this blog for months. I expected so much better of my ex because "Don't harass people" is the bare minimum I want from my staff.

Going forward, things will continue at a slower pace after the hatius. I can't trust people I bring on staff to not harass others, so I will have to do this alone despite how it impacts my health. I do hope Mod Kiko escapes this unscathed and is able to be safe and happy. Neither of us had any idea anyone on staff would do this.

#cripplepunk

[impunkster-syndrome]

I'm taking time off. I just ended a major relationship that I feel went on for too long. If their response is to always be to run away from the consequences of their actions, I can't deal with that, especially when those consequences put me in danger. I got threatening messages from someone because of them. They only ever apologized to me about it when pushed to do so. I couldn't bring up things I felt were wrong in the relationship without them spiralling and my system neglecting me to care for them.

Everyone's fronting more now that they're gone. Maybe feeling trapped was what made everyone go silent largely.

#blackbox thoughts

[impunkster-syndrome]

That was my partner. I've chosen to end the relationship due to their behavior and the fact that I am getting harassed due to it. I'm not going to out their main because apparently I can't trust anyone to not go harass anyone. If you want to speak about the emails, go find them since I told them that we were breaking up and they kicked me from every shared space they could, deleted some blogs, and cut all contact with me without a word. About three years just ended in an instant. Just running from a situation entirely while I am left to pick up everything like usual.

I had no idea about the emails at all until they told me on discord. I thought they were joking at first until I heard it from my other staff member. I'm livid that they thought that was okay to do at all. "BPD moment" times also have consequences, and me pulling the plug on a toxic relationship is one of them.

i put effort into hiding this blog due to harassment but apparently i have to use it in order to actually be believed about a situation where i was harassed and had a reaction due to that harassment based on being extremely upset, distressed, and angry. i had a moment where i lashed out at the person who had harassed me and others.

in a moment of anger while distressed and upset by being harassed i sent someone's email to like ten or so websites to be signed up for "hey wanna sign up to get updates on these projects" emails. it was only these nine or ten newsletters. but apparently someone else is being blamed, so, here you go, it was me during an intense emotional episode.

i'll be leaving and eventually deleting this blog for the safety of everyone else who uses it. bye.

#blackbox thoughts

[impunkster-syndrome]

Unlike the other person, I'm taking care of this through reports of harassment to tumblr staff. Do not go harass him. He and his followers seem to think I control every account that interacts with him or is involved. I broke up with my partner of about three-ish years over the email spam because that shit isn't okay for them to have done and it made it all worse, plus has seemed to put me in danger because of one of his followers seeming to stalk my blog and sending me vaguely threatening messages while I was offline.

If you think you're helping and go interact with him to say shit, you are not helping. You are making this so much worse for me to deal with. If the only thing stopping you from harassing him is me saying not to, I want nothing to do with you.

#blackbox thoughts

[impunkster-syndrome]

These fucking ablelists when basic accessibility. Embarrassing

We are currently on hatius due to that person attempting to pedojacket me and get people to harass us by screenshotting and sharing our blogs. Also ableist about DID, which I have. We all need time to recover. Pedojacketing is inherently an act of violence that can get people killed. And that person did it because of getting upset when presented with education and feeling publicly shamed. I had other staff remove their personal blogs from the pinned for their safety.

~ Blackbox

#cripplepunk

[impunkster-syndrome]

Don't be a coward and hide behind blocking me you fucking pussy. Pedojacketing? Not my first fucking rodeo. I'm not an SRA survivor, just a RAMCOA one. You're an abusive piece of shit for saying a fucking CSA survivor is a predator and posts about abusing children when none of that is on here. You're also harassing my staff.

Fuck off

Blog creator here, @impunkster-syndrome. You do not get to speak to the volunteers here that way so you can feel more comfortable telling disabled people you don't care if they could die and you value your aesthetic over someone else's health. Have a problem? Contact me directly. I don't give a shit about your feelings getting hurt because I can literally get a seizure from the post content you're so mad about having been reblogged for education on accessibility.

I did get a seizure due to your content. You're more comfortable giving someone a seizure than you are actually having content be accessible and keeping people from having seizures and other photosensitive symptoms.

~ Blackbox

#cripplepunk

[impunkster-syndrome]

If you can't make a post about transfems experiencing transmisogyny without making it out to be that a transfem is less capable of harm to others (intentional or accidental) due to being transfem, congrats! You are a transmisogynist!

I keep seeing this trend in stuff intended to defend transfems against the "mean transmascs" which is also transphobic and gender essentialist to bring gender into behavior discussions as if that is the reason why someone's behavior is shitty. You can't combat transmisogyny by being transmisogynistic.

#transmisogyny

[impunkster-syndrome]

Possible carpal tunnel? More likely than you think.

I am in pain.

#cripplepunk

[impunkster-syndrome]

Isn't sophie in wonderland transid neutral, saying she doesn't know enough about the subject? /gen

You're not neutral if you defend transautistic shit and try to go with the idea that altersex is the same as transintersex or that people can transition to have a medical condition that often has forced gender assignment and at times nonconsensual surgery of children. Her behavior is not neutral even if she says it is.

The "Think of who you're comfortable with hurting" argument is disgusting. You're defending racism by going "But what if the racists really feel like this?"

#the blackbox askbox

[impunkster-syndrome]

Emotional empathy, my bad for not making it more clear. I might redo the poll after this one is done in a week to get more specific and see what can be worded better. (Given tumblr's twelve button limit)

Symptom poll time. You know the drill. Self-diagnosed people are welcome to this poll, reblog for a bigger sample size.

Please share your experiences in replies and reblogs. I made this because usually HPD is left out of the empathy conversations about our cluster so I am hoping to see why, and maybe help boost HPD experiences with empathy a bit.

I forgot a fluctuating empathy button despite experiencing it myself. Please go with what you experience most often.

#madpunk #cluster b

[impunkster-syndrome]

put this together in like 40mins with no script so sorry if theres mistakes.

-s

#pluralgang #madpunk

[impunkster-syndrome]

Adding this on because this goes more into the alt right stuff and more.

The Satanic Temple, Doug Mesner, and DID

*CW: SA, CSA, SA denialism, DID denialism*

A lot of people hear about The Satanic Temple and think they're very cool and do a lot of good work.

We would question that (the Temple is ineffective at what it promises to do while its owners have troubling histories and keep TST's finances opaque in regard to where money actually ends up).

What few people know, and presumably none of the members and supporters of The Satanic Temple who themselves are plural know, is that the Grey Faction also claims Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is fake.

Full thread and more under the break.

The Rings System @TheRingsSystem

TW: S*t*n/ic words mentioned We just found out that @/satanic_temple_ has a project named grey faction, which among it's many goals that align with supporting the false memory syndrome foundation, involves disproving/disbelieving in DID. We are incredibly disappointed and hurt. Right on it's home page. "The notion that traumatic events can be repressed and later recovered is the most pernicious bit of folklore ever to infect psychology and psychiatry." "A position we have made crystal clear: Multiple Personality Disorder/Dissociative Identity Disorder (MPD/DID) is not “fake,” but typically iatrogenic, cultivated by unscrupulous mental health professionals." "We do not believe people diagnosed with DID are “faking” their symptoms; we believe people really do suffer from symptoms of mental illness... However, we are skeptical that people really can have multiple personalities... in an objective sense." They also reduce alters down to "behavioral components" such as rocking back and forth. Which is especially reproachable to take mentally ill folk's description of their lived experience and twist it into something so 2 dimensional as this. Especially when it strips us of agency. There is an important line to walk when it comes to the era of the false memory syndrome foundation. There are true, horrible instances of carceral care and medical malpractice forced on patients that must be addressed. But you cross that line when you disbelieve survivors & DID.

We're just really, really fucking disappointed in the organization that was supposed to be leftist, and is leaving one of the most harmed & stigmatized communities to rot in the pursuit of taking down some of the very the people who harmed us the most.

The Satanic Temple @/satanic_temple_

Calling for standards of mental health care that don’t allow for the propagation of crippling conspracist delusions is leaving which community to “rot”? In pursuit of taking down whom?

The Rings System @TheRingsSystem

Also, I want to make it clear that this thread does not contest your fight against “recovered memory therapy” of the 80’s (rebranded incarceration & forced meds). That’s important work, and we are all working against the people who incacerated our community for decades This thread is specifically about my disappointment that in that fight against people who used sodium Amytal, incarceration, etc as “treatment” you choose to drag down the people who were hurt by it as well. (folks with DID). Specifically, by all the quotes that I have mentioned. They are the focus of this thread. Many members of the grey faction constantly repeat these ideas, which invalidate, harm, and strip agency of a marginalized population (folks w DID). That’s what’s disappointing.

The Satanic Temple @/satanic_temple_

We think people diagnosed with DID are the MOST vulnerable to these irresponsible conspiracist practitioners.

The Rings System @TheRingsSystem

Thank you. You could do better to support our community by believing our lived experiences, and stop encouraging and spreading discourse that directly invalidates what we experience. You can say people “diagnosed with DID” are the most harmed, but that does nothing to address my point. You can say that and still believe our experiences aren’t real, still work to discredit our community. Undermining our experiences is not helpful if your goal is to help.

The Satanic Temple @/satanic_temple_

We focus on cases of recovered memory testimony that clearly are not accurate. We can’t ignore those because somebody else thinks it negates their experience, nor can we ignore the methods whereby those false claims are cultivated.

The Rings System @TheRingsSystem

Respectfully, addressing the cases where people were inaccurately convinced they had DID in carceral care settings does not require you to state on your website that your “crystal clear point” is that all DID is iatrogenic, and that multiplicity is not something we experience. I am not asking you to ignore them, and I am not saying that I feel invalidated by them. I am saddened and enraged by what they underwent, and they deserve justice. You can do that justice work without dragging down people with DID in the process. Without insinuating that our experiences are implanted and inauthentic, when many of our community has never once seen a therapist. Adding this [The Satanic Temple’s tweet reply above] to the end of the thread, as it’s where we have continued our discussion of the issue at hand. I’d also like to note that they have offered to continue discussion with us off Twitter, and we reached out yesterday and are awaiting a response. I can keep folks updated.

When we checked in a few months later, The Rings System said, "No, they [TST] ended up not responding to my email chain and haven't made any of the requested changes to any of their online content."

Grey Faction did make some changes between April 2021 and June 2021, largely removing a much longer section titled "What about Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) and Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)?" quoted from in that thread, replacing it with:

The connection between Satanic Panic and MPD/DID is undeniable. Patients convinced that they were (or are) victims of ritual abuse are nearly always diagnosed with DID, and retractors -- people who come to realize their memories of ritual abuse are false -- typically find that they were misdiagnosed with DID. However, we recognize that the existence of misdiagnoses does not by itself invalidate an entire disorder. There is ongoing discussion and debate within the field regarding the nature of DID and its causes; that discussion is largely independent of our work combating the modern Satanic Panic.

So, quite a bit shorter.

By November 2021, then one further edit was made to this section, which is where it stands today:

...modern Satanic Panic. [code word 1: pseudoscience]

This isn't surprising, and we would bet we know who in particular added it back in.

Compared with corporate structures and legal case proceedings, we don't talk a lot about is how TST owner Doug Misicko has, under the pseudonyms "Doug Mesner" and later "Lucien Greaves", spent the last two decades at least involving himself in conflicts of mental health diagnoses based more at this point seemingly on a pursuit of personal grudges than any higher ideal.

The first version of that FAQ section from 2019 until January 2021 likely was the product of Misicko solely:

The modern tide of academic writing on MPD begins around 1980, and the 1980s saw a wealth of literature presenting the condition in very simplistic terms. Therein a case is made that even a single traumatic event in childhood could be so damaging to the psyche so as to fracture it into pieces, or “alters,” that are literal personalities within the individual. These personalities were reported to have their own life histories and accompanying memories, proclivities, tastes, allergies, and even eye colors. Memory, in particular, has been regarded as central to the condition ever since DSM-III R (1987), and memory recovery and processing was, and remains, the central component of treatment. Due to the catastrophic fallout from the Satanic Panic, MPD has been the subject of controversy within the mental health community as well as in popular circles. Accordingly, the academic literature on MPD has evolved over the last three decades. Some of this was little more than obfuscation intended to stem the tide of push-back (e.g. renaming to MPD to DID to retain parity with a more circumspect DSM-IV in 1994). Some of the evolution, however, represents genuine nuance in part of the community. In developmental models of DID, for example, the condition is seen as a sort of coping mechanism for traumatic episodes that are part of an extended pattern of both trauma and love and support. In effect, an “alter state” here might not be so dissimilar from a sort of more durable “thousand yard stare” common in battle-induced PTSD cases. It would be a stretch to call this sort of state even a metaphorical personality. Even if it had some behavioral components (rocking back and forth, etc.) that were unique to it, it is a very far cry from the literal “alters” of the earlier writing. Thus, there is a range of interpretation as to what DID even is within the relatively small segment of the mental health community that entertains its legitimacy as a traumagenic disorder in the first place. There is also sometimes a troubling dichotomy in the way it is discussed in public-facing venues vs. within the “trauma community.” One encounters eyebrow-raising statements made at ISSTD conferences by individuals that would be difficult to recognize from their relatively respectable academic writing, for example. This is an intolerable situation for a supposedly professional community. Foundational ambiguity of this magnitude, an unwillingness by some practitioners to talk openly about their real views, and the pervasive use of a clearly dangerous treatment method mean that patients currently diagnosed with DID should be treated by qualified professionals outside this circle.

Here's an interview Misicko, again as "Lucien Greaves" gave to one of TST’s in-house journalists back in 2018.

Lately, it’s been a popular hobby of those who are still trying to legitimize DID to merely illustrate by way of PET or MRI that their are demonstrable indicators of DID, which avoids all of the real questions in this entire controversy, which is whether or not the condition is primarily or entirely cultivated in therapy, or the result of earlier trauma. I’ve met with and corresponded with, interviewed, and read the case studies of many people who felt that they very much did, at one time, have Dissociative Identity Disorder, but who came to realize that the condition was iatrogenically imposed, meaning that it was a dysfunction that was created and cultivated for them during the course of the therapy itself. So, in short: If there are, somewhere, credible rare cases of naturally occurring (as opposed to iatrogenically created) DID, we still have very little understanding of what that would look like because the scientifically ignorant quacks who have inextricably tied their theory and treatment to Recovered Memory Therapies.

In a former attempt at a career as a self-styled journalist under the name "Doug Mesner", Misicko devoted a lot of time and energy to for lack of a better term debunking Dissociative Identity Disorder entirely.

In 2013 in Vice, under both pseudonyms "Doug Mesner" and "Lucien Greaves", Misicko explained that one of his goals with The Satanic Temple was to "destroy this harmful pseudoscientific practice", although you can read that more or less charitably as you see fit:

In 2009, I went to a “Ritual Abuse/Mind-Control” conference in Connecticut where I listened to “experts” elaborate upon their beliefs in Satanic Ritual crimes. I thought they would be a fringe grouping of delusional people holding firmly to incredible beliefs, hurting nobody but themselves. What I found instead was a twisted subculture of licensed therapists, and their clients, who subscribe to a pseudoscientific belief in “dissociative amnesia”: The theory that some events—particularly sexual abuse—can be so uniquely traumatic that the conscious mind cannot comprehend it, and thus those memories are “repressed.” This school of “therapy” breeds conspiracy theory and literally indoctrinates clients into false beliefs in a Satanic threat. Clients are encouraged to “remember” episodes of abuse that are presumed to have been concealed from their conscious minds, and when the evidence doesn’t match their confabulatory false memories, they explain it away as evidence of a much larger conspiracy—a Satanic conspiracy. With the false veneer of science, these “experts” in dissociation have kept a witch-hunt alive. Innocent people have been convicted and imprisoned on the “evidence” of recovered memory testimony, even though this is the exact same “evidence” we have for alien abduction, and is the same “therapeutic” process by which people practice “past life regression.” I have a long and complex body of writing, much of which can be read at www.process.org, where I detail in a number of articles how this cult-like therapy subculture continues to ruin the lives of innocent people. So one of my own goals is to destroy this harmful pseudoscientific practice, and dispel the myth of an international Satanic conspiracy. The broader goal of the Satanic Temple in general is to advocate for all of those who are unjustly maligned, demonized, or marginalized—victimized by conspiracy theorists and dogmatic supernaturalists. We seek to assert the rights of religious non-believers and skeptics. We also hope to provide the philosophical framework by which our membership may hone their cognitive tools and never fall victim to those forces.

So it's not that they don't know.

Misicko just doesn't believe in DID (there's also a whole thing with Misicko about C-PTSD we won't get into here) and directs The Satanic Temple and its projects like Grey Faction accordingly. There are many good people in TST and its various organs who legitimately want to do good work.

But Misicko is co- or sole-owner of all of the various corporations that make up the Temple, and there is no overruling him. He (and Cevin Soling) sit atop the hierarchy. You cannot reform it.

So think about that when you're thinking about organizations you want to support and provide resources to.

When it comes to The Satanic Temple, there's always more and it's always worse.

Edit: Speaking of which, one more thing

As "Lucien Greaves", Doug Misicko will sometimes claim to have attended Harvard, but it's not clear what evidence has ever been provided for this.

Co-owner Cevin Soling (a.k.a. Malcolm Jarry) seems to legitimately have several degrees, including post-graduate degrees, but he came from money, so that's not surprising.

For Misicko, we'd really like to see some evidence he ever did more than take some Harvard Extension School courses and hang around on campus.

Sincerely, correct us if that exists somewhere because our searching has not turned up anything, even admission or a stray reference to him being a student, much less an alumnus.

All of that is to say, Misicko doesn't really seem to have any authority for having strong opinions about this psychological and neuroscience stuff, but he speaks as if he does, directs Grey Faction to his interests as if he does, and the effects are quite harmful.

The least defensible of these is Misicko's continued role as one of the diehards championing the now-shuttered "False Memory Syndrome" Foundation. We're mentioned this before as it's specific to Misicko and TST, but New York Magazine's Katie Heaney wrote what's likely the definitive post-mortem on that.

On December 31, 2019, the False Memory Syndrome Foundation abruptly announced it would dissolve. In some ways, this wasn’t surprising. Pam and Peter Freyd are both in their 80s, and nearly half the group’s board members are listed as “deceased.” The FMSF had raised more than $7.7 million since its founding, but the donations and dues tapered off over the years, and it ceased publishing its newsletter in 2011. The foundation gave birth to a number of offshoots; its Australian counterpart is also defunct, while the British False Memory Society remains active. The Satanic Temple, a religious group with chapters in 21 states, has a vocal false-memory subgroup called the Grey Faction. The temple’s co-founder, a 43-year-old man named Doug Misicko (who uses the pseudonym Lucien Greaves), earns a living creating content for 1,097 fans on Patreon. If the FMSF are the genteel, gray-haired grandparents, the Grey Faction are their online, cult-obsessed sons.

Misicko (as "Greaves") naturally responded with his own blog, calling the journalist a liar and worse names. This is sort of a pattern for him when he gets criticism from anyone except the far-right.

Other than the fact that under yet another pseudonym (Mikoto Niikura), Misicko continues to help run "False Memory Syndrome Action Network" a FMSF spinoff group, this association isn't exactly hidden, clearly.

It's just all done with the justification that "false memory syndrome" is primarily about the since-disproved Satanic panic rather than utilized for bog-standard sexual abuse excuses and apologism.

Anyway, not good!

#disordered plurality #madpunk #traumapunk #Youtube

[impunkster-syndrome]

People really need to learn that feeling empathy doesn't make you an inherently "good" person. It's just like any other cognitive process. Feeling happy doesn't make you an inherently "good" person. Feeling sad doesn't make you an inherently "good" person. Feeling angry doesn't make you an inherently "good" person. Hell, having too much empathy can be harmful for people. I know hyperempaths that hate it.

A feeling isn't good or bad. It's a feeling. It's the most morally neutral thing that can possibly exist.

Empathy is morally neutral. It is not good. It is not bad. Stop using it as such.

- Sincerely, the low empathy sociopathic narc that's probably a better person than the last "empath" that read this.

#low empathy #no empathy #cluster b #madpunk

[impunkster-syndrome]

Symptom poll time. You know the drill. Self-diagnosed people are welcome to this poll, reblog for a bigger sample size.

Please share your experiences in replies and reblogs. I made this because usually HPD is left out of the empathy conversations about our cluster so I am hoping to see why, and maybe help boost HPD experiences with empathy a bit.

I forgot a fluctuating empathy button despite experiencing it myself. Please go with what you experience most often.

#madpunk #mad pride #cluster b #bpd #hpd #npd #aspd #actually cluster b

[impunkster-syndrome]

thank you for the work you do. it makes me feel less alone.

I don’t think you realize how much this means to me :( Being transmasc has made it easy to feel so invisible and deeply, deeply alone, especially before finding transandrophobia conversations. Even when I started using the term, I could see that certain trans people hated my guts for it. It was isolating and I felt like a Bad Transmasc. All I needed was to be seen and understood, I just wanted someone to hear me for once. As a result, it’s become my greatest passion to provide that environment for trans men and mascs. I want to give them a space they can feel comfortable, be taken seriously, and feel a sense of community. Thanks to people like you and those in my irl spaces, I feel like I’m finally doing it!

#I don't really do a lot of direct promos #But they're genuinely a neat person with good commentary #transandrophobia