#ugh I could go on but I won’t

[fuckyeah-bears]

I woke up to find a squirrel in my apartment this morning

#They’d been in the floor for a few days #I could hear them scratching #And then today one of those little fuckers actually broke in #Can’t wait for my landlord to get here #I tried to catch the squirrel so I could bring him outside so he wouldn’t be poisoned #But he ran back down whatever hole he chewed through by the time I found a box #So now it’s just a waiting game #Also my dog is going fucking nuts #She won’t shut the fuck up #Ugh

[shima-draws]

THAT right there, ladies and gentlemen, is a LOVE CONFESSION

#One Piece #Lusan #Sanji #Luffy #Sanlu #100% A LOVE CONFESSION. STRAIGHT UP. #Wow wow wow can you guys believe Luffy said he can’t become the Pirate King without Sanji by his side. Can you believe that. #Actually tho I feel like this is SO incredibly significant #Like Luffy could easily say this to anybody on his crew but #We know for a FACT that Luffy doesn’t let anything get in the way of his dream #And the fact that he’s willing to give up on it for Sanji. If Sanji isn’t there it won’t be worth it. #Any time a character is like ‘Not without you’ I just. I J SUT #UGH. AGHHFH. They make me ill #And Sanji knows how significant him saying that is too. Bc HE knows how much Luffy wants it #Luffy needs Sanji. He’s his nakama his cook and one of the people he loves more than anything #I am GOING to explode. #Shima speaks #I’m still going through it btw. God. That episode fucked me up forever

[puppyeared]

its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously

#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to #im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but #because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of #exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something #and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh #and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing #because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant #even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still #its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn…. #if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about #I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird #maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel #a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t #I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to #be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol #idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week #had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting #yapping #does this count as vent #vent #Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly

[ssreeder]

Hi pook 😢 ( sorry if u don’t like the nickname) but I’ve been reading your series and I am reading Into the Fire (chapter 8) and I’m just wondering why you made Sokka give in so easily when people tell him to control himself that’s not Zuko. Because I would imagine that he would be more stubborn and more focused on what he wants instead of being caring. Even though he’s a caring and kind person I feel like being in prison would make him more selfish and less understanding of other people if than makes sense 😭

Like it just aggravates me when I see Katara try to idk really baby him and control him a bit (not mentally) it just kind of annoys me. Because even though Sokka loves his Sister I feel like he shouldn’t listen to her for real.

But that’s just me because that’s my opinion coming from someone behind has anger issues/ gets angry easily 🤷‍♀️

I love love love this series btw!!!!

I added your other ask too so I could respond to both! Hiiii hellooooo I don’t mind nicknames it’s actually nice because then I can keep anons apart haha

as for your comment about sokka I gotta say you’re probably the first person to tell me sokka isn’t angry enough haha. Which is fine because everyone’s allowed to have their own opinions, but my thoughts on LIAB angry sokka is his intelligence is often battling his emotions. I think sokka is smart enough to know he isn’t supposed to be lashing out at people the way he is or clinging to Zuko so tightly to where they both can’t breathe. i also think he is desperate to be back to his “old self” without actually wanting to be his old self. I do think he is fighting his path to healing every step of the way but even with all the time spent in prison he is still SOKKA. He cares for people he loves his family and he knows from watching his parents growing up what a healthy relationship looks like - his codependency to zuko is probably not it. I doubt it will change much, but when people tell him ‘you need to chill’ Sokka is very much like I FUCKING KNOW BUT I HAVE NO CHILL!!! NONE! ZERO CHILL.

but I can’t imagine sokka wanting to hurt anyone who doesn’t deserve it. Or fighting his friends and family to isolate himself anymore than he already is. I have learned that writing a more emotionally triggering fic does stir up emotions in people and causes them to project onto the characters a bit which is fine but everyone processing trauma differently. & sokka is doing it his own way just like zuko is.

Also…. This is a fanfic and I don’t know if people wanna read sokka being a raging asshole for 50k… so some of the realism in healing gets lost to word count because unfortunately I can’t spend years and 1000k helping these boys overcome their trauma so some of it has to be rushed a little for word count / plot purposes haha.

Liiiiiiisten here pooki-anon you come yell at me anytime about liab I’ll be right here to soak up every word! Thanks for the ask I’m glad you’re enjoying the series!!

#I have tried to take my time with the healing arc #Because we spent SO MUCH TIME dismantling the boys #I wanted to give them the change to be somewhat put back together to where they can at least function #I do agree with you anon! #Sokka could be 10000x angrier he could close up and say fuck off to everyone but it’s just another hurdle to climb over #His anger has been a reoccurring theme because I do write liab sokka angry #He has a right to be angry too!! #But I don’t know if people wanna sit and read sokka going in circles with his anger anymore than he already has #I love love love a good healing arc and I’m trying to take my time with the boys but…. #*word count and plot point and me eventually wanting to work on a project that isn’t LIAB haha* #I do think sokkas a mess right now #But damn it I want him and zuko to snuggle and him and Katara to laugh and his dad and him to pal around and toph and Aang to give him shit #And momo to pull his ears and appa lick him and idk all the fun sokka stuff we miss #I can’t do that if sokka won’t be open to healing and being less angry #Which is why I’m allowing him to progress haha #Ugh now we gotta work on zuko!! -> #Zuko: “why I’m fine??” #Boy is NOT FINE but he is damn good at acting fine haha #Thanks for the ask anon #Ill #give you the tag #Pookianon #Liab #ITF #ask

[lesbiansanemi]

I wish there was a way to communicate how overstimulated kids make me and how much I really wish I could reliably be in public spaces without hearing large families/children being insanely loud without sounding like one of those freaks that thinks children should be banned from public spaces

#like kids are loud kids are noisy kids need to learn to socialize #this is all fine and logically I understand this #however…… genuinely nothing sends me into overstimulation to the point of a meltdown faster than children #(it sounds so terrible and stupidly edgy but I’m also starting to think kids are some sort of trigger for me due to my upbringing esp kids #crying because… haha reasons we won’t get into) #and like I said I am WELL aware this is all a ME problem and is in no way the fault of the children or their parents #(well sometimes the parents) #(I do think some parents need to be better about comforting screaming/crying kids and teaching kids they can’t run around and scream #whenever and wherever they want) #but like. I wish I could communicate that I genuinely do hate being around children without sounding like I have overlap with the people who #are freaks about it and think kids are uniquely terrible and that it’s all the kids fault for… yk being kids #there’s not a solution here but I wish I could at least complain without having to add fifteen caveats about how I think children are ppl #and deserve respect and caring and it’s ridiculous to act like they shouldn’t be allowed in public spaces #because they are sometimes loud and annoying #but UNFORTINATELY there’s a very large annoying and loud group of adults who have INSANE opinions about children #so ugh #anyways I’m overstimulated so I went to go hide in the bathroom for a bit #but there’s a family in here with four kids and they’re all being SO loud and shrieking and laughing #and it’s making me want to bang my head into a wall #kaz rambles

[quietwingsinthesky]

im gonna put together a longer post after this for my other reactions but im putting this one here separately because i think it encapsulates my thoughts on this version of simm!master and its. they don’t really capture how he antagonizes the doctor. and what i mean is he simply would not let the doctor monologue at him like he does when twelve’s going off at him and missy. like ten fucking tries So Many Times to talk at the master, and consistently, the master cuts him off, snaps out a joke about whatever serious topic the doctor wants. he just doesn’t let it get that far, you know?

the stand-out moments he does are, from what i remember, the end of last of the time lords, when he literally Can’t stop the doctor from monologuing at him because he’s become jesus through Thought Power or some shit. and then the end of time moment we all love, stone-cold brilliant, which is a complete reversal where the doctor is the one (seemingly) securely powerless. when they’re on equal footing, he simply does not let the doctor talk at him.

and like yeah, the ‘didn’t listen to a word you just said’ thing is funny but. god, i don’t know how to put it. yeah, he would have listened. that’s why he always cuts the doctor off when the doctor tries to connect on the his terms rather than the master’s. that’s why he doesn’t let him monologue at him. that’s why he’s practically shouting over the doctor to be heard first.

if that makes any goddamn sense. do his bastardness properly, moffat. he would not fucking do that.

#he wouldnt have let the doctor get a word in. thats what. and isnt that a better contrast to missy than not listening at all? #maybe a more nuanced one. you know? #you know you can either have. missy listens and the master doesn’t. or you can have missy listens and the master won’t. doesn’t want to. #does that make sense? #dw lb #dw 10x12 #cannot emphasize enough that im not at all in my complaining about simm!master in this episode #saying. well one. not saying i dislike the episode. this is just a standout weakpoibt in an overall masterful finale. huh. huh. see what i #did there? anyway. #and two. it is not. im not saying ‘wah why is he being so mean :(‘ i dont want him to be nicer. i want him to be his awful little rat of a #self. just. in a way that fits. you know i feel very easily he could have Been more like the master of EoT and still done everything he doe #in this episode if you just leaned more into the horror of him realizing just how much missy has changed to appease the doctor. #drop the line where he goes ‘ugh do you have empathy now that you’re a woman?’ and replace it with something like. ‘did the doctor loan you #one of his bleeding hearts?’ #i get why he’s sexist towards bill. he does that. he knows how to use human bigotry to get under someone’s skin. #but like. why is he being sexist towards herself. missy barely even recognizes herself as a woman beyond when it’s a fun bit part to play. #i guess im saying that some nuance here would be nice. he knows needling at missy about her gender wouldn’t upset her. nipping at her #behavior with the doctor would. he’s gonna go for the throat on that. not on having tits. #we did get that one bit. ‘i don’t know what you see in him.’ that works a little. #but anyway. ive said what i wanted to say.

[kaeyaphile]

(muffled screaming) power outages are great

#kayleigh.txt #once summer gets here it won’t be anywhere near as stressful 🥲 #i just have 6 snakes and 3 geckos who can’t get cold obviously because they’re reptiles 🐍 🦎 #my rabbit and my 4 cats and my feeder insects will be fine as long as it isn’t like. freezing 😂 #in the summer i don’t have to worry because it’s usually the perfect ambient temperature for the reptiles so 🤷🏼‍♀️ #but alas in the winter i am. constantly stressed. power is back on for now but i have space heaters blasting #because it is so fucking windy it is almost definitely going to go off again 💀 #if we could just stop having severe windstorms once a week that’d be really great 😭 🤞🏻 #anyways i am going to actually attempt to nap now because i am absolutely exhausted ugh 👋🏻

[pylonium]

love it when PMS fatigue hits the night I wanna go out.

#I WANNAAAAA DANCE but I feel dizzy ugh #it’s only fucking 9 PM and I could fall asleep rn #I usually go to bed at 1-2 AM #next sem I won’t have early class on friday so I can go to future nights

[anonymolly]

…

#THIRD TAG RANT OF THE DAY #this time with Feelings #I am so soft for this boy I really am #but my life is such a mess right now #(and he knows that and he’s very reassuring and he’s told me a thousand times he isn’t going anywhere) #but I just! ugh #I just dropped out of grad school yesterday and I have no idea what I want to do with my career #and it feels like I’m just grabbing a thousand red flags and stuffing them in my bra these days #I just don’t know how to say ‘yeah I’m a mess right now but I promise I won’t always be this much of a mess’ #especially when my track record with that Isn’t Great! #it’s fine I’m fine I’m doing all the things I need to do and I’m prioritizing my well-being and my mental and physical health #I just can’t help but feel like I am the worst investment anyone could ever make #ANYWAYS #ugh the one night I decided NOT to get high and THIS is what I get hit with #and ofc I cannot sleep so! time to spiral ♥️ #my stuff #sorry for being a disaster today folks

[peapod20001]

*beats whatever part of my body that is releasing an abundance of stress chemicals every time I see something that’s a .07 / 100 on the stress scale*

#vent #*n o* #*talking to brain* listen here motherfucker. I’ve decided that I’m going to make steps to improve my quality of life. and to make better #choices to improve how I go about school and self care and other responsibilities #I will NOT let *you* (brain) ruin this for me after I JUST came out of a funk and felt better with going about my days!! #fucker!! I could *literally* feel my hair falling out with the stress I’ve been dealing with. and for what?? so I can make myself feel WORSE #no :) kindly! no. I won’t let you (brain) I’ll bet you with a stick (but it won’t feel it as the brain has no pain receptors) #ha! goo. fuck yourself you fucking. stress. bastards. I’ll burn down all that wrongs me #before I lose any more sanity (and hair) #I can’t be bothered to acknowledge or deal with stress like what am I gaining?? from it?? ugh. pissing me off <_< #hmgmhmp why do I care so much about people. all it does is like. make me feel insignificant. hmm #I can’t be bothered with shit. anymore. it’s not worth it

[whimsyprinx]

idk how to explain to people that like I’m trying my best to see the point in life and be optimistic and like hopeful but literally there isn’t anything to base hope and optimism on

#whimsy whispers #I feel like a failure and a burden #I feel so entirely unwanted and like I’m just invading peoples lives and like I’ve said before at any moment my life can fall apart and #there isn’t anything i can do about it #I can’t afford to do anything at the moment i can’t even get a job and even when I do like yes things will improve #but life outside of that won’t me getting a job won’t make the economy less shitty it won’t make where I live less suffocating and terrible #it won’t make me feel less isolated #just #I don’t mean to be so depressing and seem like idk #I don’t mean to burden people with how I feel #I just don’t want to exits I don’t want to be alive I have nothing and no one to exist for but i also can’t even stop existing #I have to exist I have to keep being miserable with the stupid hopes that things could get better when they’re not going to #it’s not for a lack of trying it just is getting harder and harder no matter what I do #ugh I made myself start crying

[superbattrash]

The good thing about me not wanting to wash the doors at the new place is that I get everything else done because I’m trying to avoid cleaning the doors

Which means that when I inevitably get the doors done I’ll be completely done with the place :3

#the bad thing is that I still haven’t cleaned the doors oopsie #I could do one door before dinner #am I going to? #ugh I guess #I could write instead #but then I won’t move for the rest of the day teehee #misha rants

[livvyofthelake]

huge update i might get to go home tomorrow… my professor is opening our final on wednesday instead of just thursday so now i just need to see if my friend i planned to take the exam with can do it wednesday and then if she can (she almost certainly can) i can go home after……. i wanna go homeeee i want this semester to be OVER as soon as humanly possible!!!!!!

#in theory it’s already over. i could literally go home tonight and just take that exam online at my house #but like i said i’m doing it with my friend so. #if i don’t take it with her i won’t be able to focus and it’ll be really annoying it’s a whole thing #beth.txt #but i’m like packing up for the summer now. i guess i could semi- clean the bathroom before my roommate gets back. #i have like 2 and a half more hours to kill right now so. #ugh i HATE cleaning the bathroom unfortunately someone’s got to because i don’t think my roommate ever has or will. #which is fine i mean it’s not like super super gross or anything and i’m not that much of a clean freak #hence why i have not cleaned it in. like. too long probably at this point #i think spring break. yeah there is loose hair like. all over the floor :/ #which is not to say i don’t periodically like. shallow clean #like. i clean the sink counter every day i’m here. i’ll do the toilet every like 2ish weeks. the shower gets cleaned in like. patches. #like i have not deep cleaned the shower in an amount of time that would make my sister mad at me if she was here #and the floor. yeah we already mentioned the floor. i’m not a floor cleaner girl #i rarely even vacuum my room i hate cleaning floors it’s the worst fr #well. i should stop making this post and just do it huh

[mossywizard]

If… you were the notoray on history… where would you be?

#i swear I saw one last week #did I make it up? #found a ton of other stuff I could use tho so #but #i made hot chocolate only to become hyper focused #and now music is ENERGIZING ME FURTHER #and making me want to go into a bloody ass church to say hi to a cool ass person maybe persons #grumble grumble #it won’t be for a minute #but ugh #fucking talented people

[gottagobackintime]

Having a queer “will they, won’t they” with a slice of “they have a past”. One of them is clearly ashamed of himself for being in love with another man. The other one isn’t ashamed and is desperate for the man he loves to admit his feelings and commit to a life together. They almost kiss several times. Finally gets to kiss while the “not ashamed one” is dying after he saved the man he loves.

#the nevers spoilers #Nicole watches stuff #like I was sitting here at the edge of my seat #waiting for them to finally resolve the tension with a love confession from the man who was ashamed #and or a kiss to say the same thing #they were so damn close several times #tension high and everything but no he walked away #like it was clear as day that they loved each other #but when you have a will they won’t they storyline you want to get a satisfying ending to that #and killing off one of them and only as one of them is dying do they resolve their tension #I’m so SO tired of writers killing us off #there were other people dying in that episode but it felt extrem forced to have him die #they could have easily had him be wounded but still alive #ugh well off to ao3 I go to see if someone fixed it #or I’ll have to do it themselves #also James Norton and Ben Chaplin were 100% the best in that show #I want to know their story #their history #and I want them to live happily together they deserved that #my god the spelling mistakes in these tags oops #to my defence it’s 6.30am and I haven’t slept yet

[pepprs]

cringe btw. fail a little bit as well

#purrs #not really happy with how i showed up and navigated situations and circumstances today. i think i was not as kind or respectful as i could h #have been. and there’s nothing i can do but live with it and try to do better tomorrow. but this shit is so fucking hard and horrible. this #is not what i thought i was signing up for. this is not how i thought this month would go. and i know it’s normal and natural and whatever f #for like. every aspect of this process to be happening (and yet also cringe and stupid etc) but i just wish it wasn’t happening. i don’t #want to be responsible for planing your fucking goodbye gift i want you to stay. i don’t want to fucking go on a walk with you (i mean i #quite literally do LOL but) i want to keep yearning for i and working towards asking for it naturally and not in wretched circumstances. i #don’t want to have responsibility for all the tasks and people coming into the office and giving me knowing and pitying looks and asking how #this is going and meaning both me starting something and you leaving i want the whole you leaving part to just not even be a thing. i know I #it could be worse i know it’s fucking stupid to be addressing my literal actual supervisor as ‘you’ in the tags of a tumblr post she will #never read but it’s like fucking hell. i care about you so much. this has been a nightmare and i want it to be over but it won’t be ever. an #and i have to live with this somehow and i know it will feel better but for now im just fumbling through it and hurting and suffering and it #like doesn’t even matter. idk. the timing just hurts. it really does. as does the whole thing. idk when i’ll stop being hurt but i am hurt #delete later #i think i said this but i literally have to get assigned a fucking ‘cultural contact’ bc she’s leaving and can’t guide me thru this like i #always dreamed she would. the literal actual slap in the face of it.my heart hurts lol #it’s not just work also. like i know i am a freak about work on the dash but it really is not just work. or it is but it’s like. idk. ugh i #feel so trapped in this i fucking hate it and everyone is gonna tell her / me / us / whatever that this is good and normal and expected and #we’ll be okay etc but it’s NOT. it WON’T. we’re family or something like that and she’s leaving it and me and * are sobbing and * is like ha #having to be strong for us bc both of us are mentally ill wrecks over it and i know he is too and it’s killing me and meanwhile * just fucks #off across the country and we only see her TWO more times???? are you kidding me? LOL! like you just leave? lolllllll. after everythinggggg! #which she’s entitled to do. but it’s like. i thought we all understood… but apparently we weren’t on the same page. and now we’re here. LOL #anyway i am not being any less cringe or fail by continuing to post about this to redacted number of ppl but idk how else to cope. gn lawl #one more thing my heart hurts sooooooo bad. like physically. that is just sick in the head. wtf