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crepuscularqueens · 2 years

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Oh, I don't know. A fetishizer focusing on an abusive and toxic dynamic instead of the healthy one, to the point where they're romanticizing the reasons the abuser feels the right to abuse their victim, that's what's truly fucking bonkers to me. Looking for ways to validate the toxic possessiveness of an abuser. Super fucking bonkers. Disgusting, too. You're disgusting.

okay i've been thinking on this one all day, i'm making the assumption that this person found me through the tag and does not follow me but on the safe side: unfollow and perhaps block me. takes a lot less energy. if they don't follow me, they probably will never see this post but that's fine because it's mostly just to help get this off my mind.

on the point of "fetishizer", this word gets thrown around a lot in fan spaces as a way to win arguments/accuse people who don't share your opinions and i'm not sure exactly what you think i'm fetishizing. my guesses are either abusive relationships or gay men in general (the latter since it's the most popular accusation in fan spaces). that's a lot to get out of a very simplified two line text post speculating about the origins of a character's tattoo.

i'm guessing by "focusing on an abusive and toxic dynamic instead of the healthy one", you've made yet another assumptive leap, thinking i ignore stede and ed's relationship in favor of ed and izzy's. another reason i don't believe you follow me: a quick look at my blog would show you that's not even close to being true. maybe scroll through a blog for ten seconds before making an assumption like that and being extremely unpleasant to a stranger? again, it was a speculation on izzy and ed's past (not even one that was theorizing it to be romantic! it was purely about the x tattoo, many people have pointed out ed's signature was an x and made the connection!) of which there's an untold amount of time previous to when we see their appearance in the show, most likely years. whatever you believe the nature of that relationship was, clearly they are important to one another in some way.

"to the point where they're romanticizing the reasons the abuser feels the right to abuse their victim" again, i didn't do this. i presented two options of the origin of the tattoo on izzy's cheek, the first of which (ed having tattooed it onto izzy himself for whatever reason) is a pretty popular theory i've seen many people speculate on. given how close they work as characters, especially previous to ed meeting stede, it's a reasonable theory. i didn’t say this gives izzy the right to treat ed the way he does, i didn't say it was romantic. i said something along the lines of it probably would have a lot of meaning to izzy that way and joked that it's part of why he's "bonkers". a character who acts negatively or abusively to another character usually does have motivations for those actions, and they are always misguided in those motivations but that doesn't mean they don't exist. speculating about what these motivations might be isn’t excusing them or declaring them to be right or romanticizing them. if the character had no motivation to act the way they did it would be very one dimensional and not very interesting.

"Looking for ways to validate the toxic possessiveness of an abuser" i never said i agree with the way izzy acts. its part of the story and im not going to ignore it? he's obviously treating ed horribly, i dont think that’s good or romantic or worthy of praise or validation. the fictionalized version of israel hands that was written for ofmd is not reading my silly joke text posts about why he has an x tattooed on his cheek and thinking to himself "oh this means the way i treated edward was completely valid". he's not real. i don't condone treating people shittily, i don't condone abusive behavior. i don't think this is an explanation i should have to make after making a spur of the moment very brief text post about, once again, the origins of a fictional character's tattoo.

i am sorry that you felt the need to send this aggressive message for whatever reason. it made a lot of assumptions about beliefs i do not hold. i hope you're able to move past whatever it is that's hurting you badly enough that you feel the need to send messages to complete strangers calling them disgusting based on wild assumptions you made. please don't darken my doorstep again.

#anonymous #ask #this is long so im sorry idk how to add a read more to this

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