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#this one was so unnecessarily difficult
morebird · 1 year
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Now you are the hunted.
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Hokage Naruto x Male Reader
a/n: making a quick fic for the ass end of Kinktober, I thought it be fitting to use a classic character and a classic kink, yeah I don't know why but Hokage Naruto got me acting up contains: some good ol' fashion cockwarming
Naruto was where he could usually be found; in his office doing paperwork, piles and piles of paperwork. Normally Naruto would be a little exhausted at this point, tired from several hours of constant writing for this and signing off on that, but today felt a little different.
As Naruto moved foward to place another finished paper in his done pile he stopped just short, his fingers twitching to grip the paper in his hand and his face ingniting in a red hue.
"Aww what's the matter Lord Hokage, feelin' distracted?" You said from behind the seventh, wrapping your arms around his waist and placing your head on his shoulder.
The reason Naruto was feeling so awake today was because his boyfriend currently had his cock lodged inside him. For the past few weeks Naruto had been acting especially sluggish as if work was becoming even more strenuous than normal, so to help Naruto stay up and alert while working you came up with a plan. Have the seventh hokage sit on your dick while he worked. It really was a full proof plan, I mean, who could possibly be unattentive and tired when you were straddling a cock that was constantly touching your prostate and even the slightest movement made you feel aroused? The answer was nobody, not even the hokage himself apparently.
You started kissing the hokage's neck being careful not to leave any obvious marks-- Naruto claimed it wasn't a good image to have as an upholding leader-- only lingering just long enough for Naruto to gently lean into you, tilting his head so you could have better access. You continued, leaving a trail of kisses from the side of Naruto's neck to the back, lightly biting down right in the center. Naruto, completely unprepared, gasped along with a jolt of his body making him remember the dick still inside him. Naruto instinctively reached for the arms of his chair gripping them for dear life while a particularly loud groan left his mouth, he was starting to feel a little sensitive after several continuous hours of you being inside him.
"Wow, you've really done a lot of work today, Lord Seventh, I think it's about time you took a break," you said in a hushed voice muffled slightly by your lips still grazing the back of Naruto's neck, with each word the hokage couldn't help but shiver. "I think it's about time you took a break." As the words were leaving your mouth, your hand had made it's way down to Naruto's crotch quickly feeling the protruding bulge and grabbing a hold of it, it twitched from your touch, you could also feel a large wet spot where his precum had leaked through his pants. Naruto's only response was another loud moan, he was becoming less and less able to hold back his desire for you, he needed you, now.
Naruto's want was something that he didn't even have to use words to communicate to you, you could already tell how desperate he was for you to actually start moving, thrusting your hips into him as hard as you could, not caring who heard either of you fucking right there in the hokage office. You smirked at the thought.
Naruto let out one more pathetic, half concealed moan, "I guess that's a yes," you said before picking you and Naruto up out of the chair and placing him on top of his desk.
You admired the view of Naruto lazily pulling his pants down the rest of the way, freeing his cock, while you moved your hand up his back taking his shirt with you exposing more and more of the athletically built body underneath. You breathed out an airy laugh, looking at the plump ass of the adorable man below you, swaying back and forth from the effort of fully taking off his pants. Grabbing a handful of Naruto's ass you tested pushing your hips even closer, forcing every last bit of your cock inside. You just didn't want to pull out it was far too warm and snug inside Naruto, he fitted you like a glove, like he was made for you and you alone. Naruto began whimpering with each attempt you made at getting deeper inside of him, forcefully pressing against his prostate each time causing him to clench down on you even harder. You joined in with Naruto's little noises, moaning out, getting louder each time he got tighter.
As fun as it was to simply be inside Naruto, to really help him truly make the most of this break from work, you had to start fucking him properly and show him how much of a good stress relieving boyfriend you could be.
Better yet, you could see how much of a moaning mess you could turn the hokage into.
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tboy-boone · 6 months
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hello and welcome to my lost dub of the glasses diagnosis scene
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poliodeuces · 7 months
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Soma Saito "Reminiscence" Live (1st Live "quantum stranger(s)")
big fan of his singing in this specific live. the fuckin jump to falsetto in the chorus is soooo satisfying to hear
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toastsnaffler · 13 days
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I will say while I've loved most of elden ring I'm really glad I'm down to just 2 more main boss fights (malenia + maliketh) before I start the endgame boss fights... whew 😮‍💨
#really gorgeous world but frankly its unnecessarily long. theyre gonna kill me for saying that but its true..#some areas/bosses just become overly repetitive when the game is THAT massive like its unavoidable#they tried rly hard to distinguish every area + honestly its a great effort but it couldve been half the size and just as good#like i just did the elphael ulcerative tree spirit bc i wanted to finish millicents questline. and come on man we didnt need another one#the design is sick + loooove the animation. but its a bad fight not bc of the difficulty but bc its janky as hell#lock on doesnt work properly bc of its size and the way it moves. u cant see shit on ur screen fighting them melee its just hack n slash#and theyre always in the most dogshit arenas possible for them like spaces w no maneuverability. its just not fuuuun#especially after youve fought 5 or 6 already earlier on in the game..#and its cool to have variations like the scarlet rot ones but we already HAD one of those just before lake of rot!! the gimmicks worn off#i did everything except maliketh in farum azula today as well and again. it didnt need to be that long. killing beastmen gets boring#after like the first 20 combat is just mashing buttons.. even the platforming is getting dull bc ive done 120 hours of it now#and theres only so many combinations of ladders and hallways and so on that u can possibly cram in here..#i say all this with fondness like i truly do love it. but it couldve been a lot tighter! regardless ill still 100% complete it#and i get most ppl dont try to get every single armament and talisman etc so they probably dont waste time FULLY exploring like i am#ahhh. anyway ill probably do malenia and maliketh tmr bc im right outside both of their arenas. and then call it quits this weekend#ill get my first ending next weekend probably... and hopefully by june ill have 100% and then i can play something else 😭#ik the dlc comes out in june but ill probably take a month or two break before i get to that#it doesnt even neeeed a dlc.......its excessive as it is just make a new game by this point ahhhhh#anyway its like 1am i need to SLEEP. i said i would go out to watch for northern lights but its overcast and im tired and my roommate#didnt wanna come with.. so i was gonna go to bed early instead but i guess that didnt happen lol#gonna feel like shit tomorrow bc i have to be up early to take my meds and she'll wake me up anyway.. but cross that bridge#typing is getting difficult bc im so sleepy okay goodnight everyone#.diaries
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i need a title for my trigun polycule roadtrip fic WHAT DO I CALL IT
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eldesperadont · 2 years
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very low energy lately cause i sleep horribly, also my hype about doing commissions turned into frustration cause of the hurdles in my way thx to my disability, i wanna break my head through a wall
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uniformbravo · 1 year
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all these mfers selling manga on ebay who take pics of literally every angle of the book EXCEPT the back!!!!!! why!!!!!!! im gonna fucking get u!!!!!!!
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How to lose 20 pounds in 3.5 weeks!
Have an autoimmune disorder
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the-kipsabian · 4 months
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i got an email inviting me to do video replies for job interview questions
huh
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brightgnosis · 1 year
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I really do dislike that Tumblr no longer shows comments (either any, or only select ones) on a post if you've been blocked by or have blocked any user participating on a post. Because I legitimately thought the OP'd actually deleted my comments wholesale for a second because my comments suddenly vanished- and I was mad about it because it's actually an important topic that often gets ignored and swept under the rug exactly like that ... But they hadn't. It was just Tumblr itself being a fuckbag again (because I know I'm blocked by one of the other people participating on that post) and it's so stupid.
Tumblr legit had me mad at someone for no reason because their bullshit- bullshit that shouldn't even be a thing to begin with (there's literally no reason people should no longer have comments access if people on the thread who are not the OP have blocked them)- and that's completely unfair to the individual.
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I fuckin hate how health services are connected to apps.
I’ve been procrastinating on finding a certain kind of specialist and didn’t realize that part of the reason for doing so had to do with not having an account for a certain app.
So every time I try to look up the specialist it’ll open up the app and not have the proper login info because it’s 9pm and I’m too lazy to find my health insurance card.
I’m just wondering: why the simple fuck can I not just find the specialist that is covered under my insurance without having all this bullshit in the way? There is literally no reason for this beyond the American Healthcare System being designed to be this fucking annoying.
If the American Healthcare System was a person I would’ve stabbed the fuck outta them rn.
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vanessagillings · 2 months
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I’m posting the ever-so-rare photo of myself alongside one of my characters based on my childhood because today is World Autism Acceptance Day, and I wanted to show my little corner of the internet who this particular autistic person is:  
I was officially diagnosed in February, at age 38 (I’m now 39). A lot of people thought I couldn’t be autistic.  Some people who know me in real life still don’t.  And until around 10 years ago, I didn’t think I could be either, because I was nothing like the stereotype media portrays. I was told that autistics lacked empathy (untrue), and never played make-believe (also often untrue) and only enjoyed STEM.  I was — and am — an empathetic artist -- and make believe?  I can spend days sketching finely bedecked bears brewing tea or carefully choosing the right words to weave tapestries of fiction — though perhaps my hyper focus was a bit of a red flag.  Even so, how could autism describe me?  I was a good student.  I got straight A's. I didn’t act out in class.  I can make eye contact…if I must.  And lots of girls hate having their hair brushed with an unholy passion, right?  Clearly I swim in sarcasm like a fish, so autism couldn't be why I was so anxious all the time, could it?
If someone had told me when I was younger what autism ACTUALLY is — instead of the nonsense I’d seen on screens — I would have seen myself in it.  I didn’t hear that autistics have sensory issues until I was in my mid-twenties, which is when I first began to really research autism symptoms, and I had almost all of them:  sensitivity to light, smells, fabrics, temperatures, textures, and certain touches, all of which make me feel anxious, I fidget (stim), I never know what the hell to do with my hands or where to look, I talk too little or too much, I have special interests, I have entire animated movies memorized shot-by-shot and can remember the first time and place I saw every movie I've ever seen but I often forget what I'm trying to say mid-sentence, I echo movies and tv shows (my husband and I have a whole repertoire of shared echolalias, making up about 20% of our conversations), I was in speech therapy as a kid, I have issues with dysnomia and verbal fluency, I toe-walk, I can't multitask to save my life, I like things just-so, I’m deeply introverted but not shy, I need to recover from all social interaction — even social interaction I enjoy — and I find stupid, every day things like grocery shopping, driving and making appointments overwhelming and intensely stressful, sometimes to the point where I struggle to speak.  It turns out, I am definitely autistic. My results weren't borderline. Not even close. And while these aren’t all of my challenges, and not everyone with these symptoms is autistic, it’s definitely something to look into if you present with all of these things at once. 
So why did it take me so long to get diagnosed? The same bias that exists in media threads through the medical community as well, and because I'm a woman who can discuss the weather while smiling on cue, few people thought I was worth looking into. Even after I was fairly certain I was autistic, receiving an official diagnosis in the US is unnecessarily difficult and expensive, and in my case, completely uncovered by my insurance.  It cost me over $4000, and I could only afford it because my husband makes more money than I do as a freelance illustrator — a job I fell into largely because it didn’t require in-person work; like many autists, I have been chronically underemployed and underpaid, in part due to physical illness in my twenties, which is a topic for another day.  But it shouldn’t be like this.  It shouldn’t be so hard for adults to receive diagnoses and it shouldn’t be so hard for people to see themselves in this condition to begin with due to misinformation and stereotypes. Like many issues in America, these barriers are even higher for marginalized groups with multiple intersectionalities. 
It’s commonly said that if you’ve met one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person.  This is why it’s called a spectrum, not because there’s a linear progression of severity (someone who appears to have low support needs like myself might need more than it seems, and vice versa), but because every autistic person has their own strengths and weaknesses, challenges and experiences, opinions and needs.  No two people on the spectrum present in the same way.  And that’s a good thing!  No way of being autistic is inherently any better than any other, and even if someone on the spectrum struggles with things I don’t — or can do things I can’t — doesn’t make them more or less deserving of respect and human dignity.
But speaking solely for myself, the more I learn about autism, the happier I am to be autistic.  I struggle to find words and exert fine motor control, but my deep passion and fixation has made me good at art and storytelling anyway.  I find more joy watching dogs and studying leaf shapes on my walks than most people do in an entire day.  More often than not, the barriers I’ve faced weren’t due to my autism directly, but due to society being overly rigid about what it considers a valid way of existing.  My hope in writing this today is that maybe one person will realize that autism isn’t what they thought — and that being different is not the same as being less than. My hope with my fiction is to give autistic children mirrors with which to see themselves, and everyone else windows through which to see us as we actually are.
If you’re interested in learning more about autism or think you might be autistic, too, I recommend the Autism Self Advocacy Network  autisticadvocacy.org and the following books:
What I Mean When I Say I’m Autistic by Annie Kotowicz
We're Not Broken by Eric Garcia
Knowing Why edited by Elizabeth Bartmess
Unmasking Autism by Devon Price, PhD
Loud Hands edited by Julia Bascom
Neurotribes by Steve Silberman
(trigger warning: the last two contain quite a lot of upsetting material involving institutionalized child abuse, but I think it’s important for people to know how often autistic children were — and are — abused simply for being neurodivergent).
Thanks for reading 💛
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peachedtvs · 3 months
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ALASTOR TENDING TO LICKING YOUR WOUNDS ft!Alastor
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✧ After an accidental paper cut, Alastor loses control momentarily and licks up your blood. 0.9wc
Imagine you and Alastor are staying up late one night, trying to decorate the hotel as a celebration for surviving the recent extermination.
All of this was your idea, Alastor simply tagging along as he was intrigued by how you were planning to decorate the hotel with mere ribbons and colored paper in a single night. The new renovations have expanded the hotel extensively, almost doubling its size—intriguing him on how your little passionate project could even be possible when done alone. If you were successful, Alastor could be content by the way Charlie's face would light up in the morning. If you failed, Alastor could soak up your disappointment! It was a win-win for him.
You furrowed your brows, hunched over a coffee table in the hotel reception, kneeling on the floor as Alastor sat reading not too far from you. You were focused on delicately carving the page before you, fingers delicately wrapped around a sharp paper-knife.
Outside, the rain was pouring. You never were a fan of thunderstorms, the booming sounds from outside snapping you out of your deep concentration every couple of minutes—some of the blaring clashes pairing with a bright flicker of light that made you flinch. Alastor found you amusing, being so passionate in something no one had asked you for, in something that would be unnecessary and also unnecessarily difficult for you to be done alone. The fact that you were pulling an all-nighter for this endeavor was even more entertaining, as you'd become all cranky once the next afternoon would come.
You let out a harsh sigh, your chest falling so far it seems as though you deflated. You regained your composure, holding your two hands close together as you pressed the page down into the table below—holding it in place as you carved a particularly intricate piece in the page when a shockingly loud crash thundered from outside. You flinched much too harshly this time, your wrist slipping and the paper-knife nicking the side of your index finger. You hiss, dropping the bloodied paper knife onto the table as it stained the pure white page below.
Alastor swore the air became heavier.
He didn't know what had so severely caught his instincts, but his wide eyes immediately darted to you before he could even process the situation—eyes locked onto the deep red trickling down your index. You hadn't even begun to notice him yet, hadn't noticed the way the air in the reception hall seemed to shift at the scent of your blood, how the light momentarily flickered.
You had such a sweet aroma.
An aroma that threatened Alastor's sanity.
Alastor's breath hitched sharply, snapping the book closed by the spine as he laid it as gently as he could upon the side table by his seat. Before he could even process it, your wrist was gripped into the palm of his hand—held firmly as you looked up to him.
The blood from your index trailed down the appendage, dipping down to the joint of your thumb as you looked up to him—startled by how quickly he had moved without you even noticing.
"Ala—"
"It would be wise to be more careful with that knife of yours, my Dear." He brought your wrist closer, his eyes locked on your hand. "Your clumsiness has put me in quite a difficult position." You looked at him intently, still sitting on the ground while Alastor was bent at the waist, holding your wrist up to meet his lips—when his tongue gently ran up the side of your palm before cleaning the blood smoothly. The moment he had your taste on his tongue, he felt his sanity slip away.
This wasn't like his usual respectful self, but he was unable to concentrate. Your flesh was euphoric. The kind he'd savor for weeks, the kind he wouldn't even need to cook or prepare beforehand. Fresh off the bone sort kind of sweet, a sickeningly addictive taste paired with a perfectly prominent metallic tang that had him wanting more.
Although, he was much too fond of you to rip you apart.
And so, Alastor vouched for slipping your finger into his mouth. His long tongue wrapped around the digit, a sting from his saliva sinking into the wound had you wince—your face looked beautiful in pain.
Alastor knew you trusted him, explaining why you hadn't pulled away. Instead, looking at him with a shocked and confused expression—ignoring your pain in his favor, just like the kind little soul you are.
Alastor pulled away, plucking a handkerchief from his pocket to clean your hand completely.
"My apologies, mon cher. I hope you didn't mind my little midnight snack." Alastor smiled to you, clearing his throat in an attempt to regain his lost composure. Although, he couldn't hide the lack of light in his eyes, and he couldn't suppress the wretched thoughts that clouded his head. He wanted to sink his teeth into your neck, to hear your pilant sounds of pain as he carved his bite into your flesh. He wouldn't tear into you, no. Simply mark you, border on the edge of savouring you in his mind completely and staying the gentleman he was raised to be.
In his own strange way, Alastor cared for you.
He wanted to wrap you into his embrace, overwhelm you as you'd tried to shrink away with nowhere to escape from him. He wanted to engrave your taste deep into his memory, to dig into your arms as he'd hold you scarily still.
For now, the only desire he could fulfill now laid upon his desk. A thin tendril of his shadows had swiped both the blood-soiled page and paper knife from the coffee table behind you and delivered it to his bedroom.
Alastor was no sentimental man, but he'd treasure a memory of your flesh to the grave.
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damnedifivoodoo · 2 years
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drchucktingle · 4 months
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Hi Dr. Tingle,
I just wanted to say, as someone who has been in the Homestuck fandom for a long time, that I'm so sorry people connected to the game and the comic have been so unnecessarily unkind to you, and that they've carried on this bit so far past the point of decency. Homestuck as a piece of media is deeply saturated with a very particular brand of early 2010s online irony, and there are some folks in the fandom who just refuse to let it go.
I think there are a lot of people out there who choose to take your sincerity as mockery, because to do otherwise would force them to confront their own cynicism and irony-poisoning and commit to self reflection in a way that they're not willing to do at this point in their lives. I'm not saying they're inherently bad people, because I don't believe that and (based only on the limited snapshot of yourself that you give to the world) I don't think you would either, only that they're making unkind decisions out of a fear of difference. Your work is both delightfully fun and incredibly meaningful, for me and a lot of others, and I just wanted to say that.
I'm not entirely sure where I'm going with this, so I'll just say that I hope your day is going well if/when you're reading this.
Respectfully,
Ray/cultivating-saplings
P.S. I would classify Hussie as a light scoundrel, in a 'season 1 villain who you can tell is eventually going to move into the heroes' apartment later in the show and hang out eating all of their chips' sort of way.
P.P.S. I like your lab coat :]
i do not have a lot to respond with other than I LIKE THIS MESSAGE and i think you are correct not just with this way of a specific fandom but with a HUGE PORTION OF THE INTERNET and a certain age range who trotted up in online forums and various websites.
there is a deep deep deep irony poisoning going on with some of these buckaroos and i think my trot kind of short circuits that and it is difficult for these folks to grapple with it. i think when you are used to every single thing on the internet being drenched in irony and every big reveal of an online presence being some keyboard goofball 'trotting for the lulz' it can be very difficult to see chuck and just accept that i am sincere. i have empathy for this.
i should also add that, of course, not all irony is bad. too much can be very destructive though.
all i can do is keep creating my art and being sincere about it, and i think the longer that continues to more irony poisoning will drain from some of these veins. that is one way i can prove love is real i think.
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