Tumgik
#this is how I cope mates.
rainbowchaox · 7 months
Text
Analysis of Pissa So Far.
This is a essay looking at our favorite death dads and how their relationship changed and their different nuances from to start to most recent. This will primarily look at the major three times we had Phil and Missa interact from the start with being paired for the eggs to recently the Mexican Independence Party. So bare with me and come with me down memory lane.
I rewatched day 1 of the pairing up of pissa to mainly cope with CERTAIN lore that happened recently. And yes it’s as fluffy and cute as I remembered. But let’s start at the beginning. Before the pairing up Missa and Phil knew of each other casually like acquaintances. In real life along with in general their characters/cubitos. (Again major thanks for the server in general bringing all these wonderful creators together.) Anyways the first time Phil met Missa was when he jumped off the wall and gave them food. I like to imagine missa had a non-serious crush on the man. But they didn’t really interact. And it’s fair to understand why.
But then the egg event happened. Which honestly in my opinion was the best event to bring the Spanish and English sides together organically. And looking back now it WORKED. So back on track everyone goes to the adoption center and like most Qsmp events it’s total chaos. Phil chooses his ticket and when I rewatched it Missa literally like spammed clicked it to break it and get Phil. Atleast that is what it looks like to me. So we already have the seeds of simp Missa from the very start. Also can we all take a break and just realize they both got tickets with D? And literally they are Deathduo? The more I rewatch the pairing lottery the more I think it was rigged by the admins and not actually by chance. Every duo either had similar humor or charm.
Immediately Phil and Missa find out they both have D. And it’s casual no romantic undertones the cubitos are still getting to know each other. But Missa being a sweetheart immediately is like you can choose whatever egg. And I think this is when Phil starts to soften and gets majorly endeared towards the clumsy reaper. Like not a crush. Not love. But the seeds of the adoration and love we see from Phil down the road. The fact of the matter Phil let Missa choose Chayanne name. The fact literally the newly formed death family was being fluffy and saying chayanne will be the best egg while literally everyone was screaming in the background. Its the main thing that would later define the dynamic of the ship. The gentle understanding and teamwork. That would later be a staple whether you ship them platonically or romantically.
And chayanne is the best way to show why pissa was meant to always work. Chayanne personality and hobbies all came from his two dads (Literally the reason chayanne was interested in cooking so much was because Missa taught him to cook). And like Phil once he was thrust into parenthood with Missa immediately found him endeared by his assigned husband? The amount of times he laughed because of Missa. Another theme so important to why pissa works so well.
Missa is Philzas calm balm. He relaxes Phil so much. And that’s so rare for that to happen. So of course a hour or so in taking care of their son. Phil visibly softens and gets endeared to the man. Phil immediately starts worrying about missa when he left. Missa may have fallen first but Phil fell harder. Like more time Phil spends with Missa the more comfortable and at ease he gets. Missa fully was like I have the best husband ever let me casually call you pet names.
Not to mention two popular scenes burned into the minds of fans. The moment when Mariana called Phil my love and tried to steal him. And Phil being Phil immediately was I’m okay with my partner thank you very much. And both Missa and Phil cuddled close. I still think Missa fell day 1 but Phil was quickly getting a crush on his assigned husband. Secondly Phil literally invited Missa to bed.
Their dynamic was one of like relaxation of trust and just both trying their best for Chayanne. They easily slid into a cute dynamic as both got endeared to the others. And also in day 1 Phil never said platonic it’s only after day 1 he started using that. And only when he wasn’t with Missa. He is a repressed romantic guy struggling with a crush. Not to mention the crows practically grew so attached to Missa it was insane to see.
Anyways like most couples they had to both take care of chayanne until Missa canonically got kidnapped by wolves for four months. During the time Missa was there he was pining HARD for Phil. Calling him his love and darling in Spanish. Phil meanwhile keep saying it was platonic and most of the fans accepted that. But then Missa was gone.
And cubito Phil missed him so fucking much. It’s at this point I fully believe is when Phil finally realized he loved him. He kept referencing Missa. He made armor for Missa. He dyed his backpack black with a skull because of Missa. It’s truly my belief that Philza realized he fucking adored the man in Missas absence. He never gave up waiting for Missa. And Missa eventually kept his promise and came back to his family.
And this is when you see some of nuance or facets change slightly in their dynamic. The core is the same all the way back from day 1 but it does change. It somehow becomes softer and domestic. Sure Philza even before his grand realization in Missa absence SPOILED missa. Missa made him soft. But when the reunion happened? Somehow Philza softens even more. Somehow he spoils Missa even more. This is why I believe that Philza finally realized he loves Missa. Because there is a clear increase in the affectionate displays between them.
Philza and the rest of the server went on the mission once Missa appeared. It was legit like Philza forgot that he was a mission. Philza when Missa appeared immediately softened so much. Of course Philza isn’t angry he’s gone. He just missed his husband. And voila once asked by Cellbit “oh this is your husband?!” He immediately agreed. This is important because for months if someone asked about who is Missa he would always and never fail to say Missa is his platonic partner/husband.
But in the reunion Philza just said husband. Because in my opinion Philza fully thought of Missa his romantic partner. The fact that Philza showed everyone including Missa the skull on the black backpack almost like a bird showing off his feathers. And Missa was immediately all gushy. The fact he only looked at Missa when he said you can go into my boat. And felps not realizing the sorta of energy the two of them was having immediately was cursed to be a third wheel.
Like literally felps was in the back of the boat being all “just ignore that I’m here” when literally Philza and Missa were lost in their own fucking world. Gently flirting with each other. Felps was regretting majorly getting in the boat with them so no wonder he bounced as soon as possible. And literally they were left by themselves still on a mission to save people. But I won’t lie it was a date.
Just them loving in each other company. And Philza being so gentle and loving and protective towards Missa. Their dynamic at their core is the same yes. But it’s undeniably more romantic. And Missa side of the dynamic also changes. He starts trying his best to protect Philza. The man who has from the start been protecting him and their son.
Missa slowly starts to become more brave and actually comments on how attractive Phil is in front of him. (I can see your pecs….yes Missa we get it you love Phil). They are closer than ever. Phil also immediately accepts Missa as Tallulah other dad. Do you guys know how massive that is? He trusts and loves Missa so darn much to let him easily be part of his whole family.
And eventually Missa had to go for a bit. But the amount of pissa interaction we get during the renuion stream doesn’t end. We have loads more to dissect. Missa comes back in hope to see his son and new daughter but sadly they were sleeping but later on despite showing Tubbo around. Once he saw Missa was whispering to him in chat immediately left as soon as possible to get to his husband. Also Cellbit who was with him and tubbo was immediately like “oh you need to help your husband understandable” while tubbo was just like so confused.
Meanwhile before this Missa was crying wanting to go back to Phil. Phil is his safety blanket. Phil never fails to make him feel safe and secure and protected. There’s reasons why Missa fell so quickly. And they met up. And to bring up my earlier point above. What Phil does nest is one of my primarily reasons why I believe Phil fully realizes he loves Missa.
Yes Phil spoils Missa. It’s his love lanuage but all the gifts and upgrades he did late at night (which Phil made a mission to give stuff to Missa before he logged off.) and even the armor he made so long ago. The amount of spoiling and pampering just screams love, adoration, and affection.
And of course they get sorta matching backpacks. And of course Missa says he loves him so fast so the translator doesn’t pick it up. This leds to when Missa showed up by himself had a loony toon day before being called out by roier. He fully says he loves Philza. LOVES PHILZA. TE AMO. Romantic.
Most of the fans knew because just look how Missa acted. But once it was confirmed Missa feels romantic feelings for Philza? That’s when the majority starting fully accepting them as romantic soulmates. And started seeing Philza actions how they are. Romantic. (Though if you prefer them as platonic that’s also very valid).
The only reason a pissa wedding or confession haven’t happened is because Missa loves Philza so much he doesn’t want to make him uncomfortable or burden him with his feelings for him. If philza said let’s get married he would accept immediately. But knowing Phil he will say nothing about loving Missa because he is scared he won’t be able to be protect.
And more recently. The Mexican Independence Day party. I won’t lie the times they were together they were always flirting. They were so cute. And both in my eyes were getting brave with their love for the other in their own ways. Missa literally screaming VIVA TE AMO on stage when Roier said Philza. Or Philza making sure he follows Missa during the dance. The fact Philza was so gentle explaining the recent egg disappearance and made a comment of being shock that Missa came back (he misses Missa so much each time he is gone.).
And their dynamic switches slightly again. Because Phil the whole time was worried and hovering around Missa when ingesting everything lore at once. And Missa is again getting brave he fully said he going on a date with Phil. It’s romantic. There’s no way I can personally can see it otherwise (though again if you like them platonic you are hella valid). At the start there was seeds but their romance has grown. They love each other. They need to confess for my sanity. And I fully trusts that Missa will have some sort of role in saving his love. And maybe perhaps we can get a confession or wedding in the future-
270 notes · View notes
brainrotcharacters · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
peak scorpio behavior ♏
562 notes · View notes
ransomdemands · 6 days
Text
yknow sometimes the way trans women talk about testosterone and being on estrogen is indistinguishable from the way terfs try to convince afab people not to start hrt
this is not a criticism mind you, their experiences are their own and completely legitimate, it's just a matter of competing needs - they need a safe space to talk about their dysphoria and how testosterone makes them feel and i need to not hear about how i am destroying my body with hrt
ordinarily these things are pretty insular to transfem circles but since instagram has been feeding me transfem content i'm seeing it more and more and yet again the algorithm is fucking me
25 notes · View notes
yuridovewing · 4 months
Text
*head snaps up with the speed of arrows*
CLOUDTAIL AND BRIGHTHEART GO TO REBUILD SKYCLAN
30 notes · View notes
Text
Theo, thinking of Liam: Having feelings sucks. You think I could get my sister to rip my heart out again? Stiles, having been awake for the last 48 hours: My life's a chaotic mess. Sometimes I wish I was still possessed so I could at least enjoy it. Isaac, knowing he has 6 assignments due next week: I don't know about you, guys, but the freezer seems pretty tempting right now.
252 notes · View notes
metabolizemotions · 23 days
Text
I thought this was a very well-rounded episode with the writing, directing and editing. This felt like a true ensemble episode that gave both excellent group and individual scenes.
The pacing was great. It gave necessary space to each character to tell their story. Yet nothing felt dragged or rushed. It allowed the actors to showcase their acting chops, including their voice acting - in a clever way to show the intensity with the budget they have. (Which I personally prefer to the unrealistic disaster scenes.)
To me, those who made it happen, really know and love the characters. They respected the audience, esp. with the visual storytelling. The shots were creative and the close-up really showed the characters' POVs. Whatever convoluted and shoehorned plot points that brought them here, the scenarios felt true to characters.
For the team, it was a sort of a mid-season check-in and "day in the lives of", as they adjust to the new captain and new mayor. I love the structure that began with the flash forward of the climax (Andy's crisis) and ended with the resolution (Andy feeling she failed Pruitt's legacy). The episode fully captured the physical and emotional toll on the firefighters. Even with all the fighting, 19 felt like a team.
I love that the music was used to complement the aftermath of the climatic scene, to reflect on the mental states of the team members. Not during, and not to do the heavy lifting in an action montage.
Everyone else also had their moment of reflection or challenge, when they are forced to face the truth and make a difficult decision or remain in denial and fall back on their usual coping mechanisms.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The Marina scenes felt so them. They are so very married. How they fight and communicate evolved, showing their growth. I love how Stefania captured both the idiosyncrasies b/w Danielle n her, and Carina n Maya. The humor was on point.
Tumblr media
Even with the darker scenes, this episode felt like a love letter, to the show, to the characters and to the fans. It exuded a warmth, like Stefania.
13 notes · View notes
limophoitos · 11 months
Text
is it normal for me to be extremely attached to this one family of pixelated cats i made in a game
22 notes · View notes
bbqhooligan · 2 months
Text
through all of it, after all of it, ill still be mulling over Bella Swan. unlike other parts of smeyers writing where the glaring issues take the front seat to parts that are well written or interesting, bella remains special to me. genuinely worlds most boring girl, meant to be a mormon self insert but her humanity fleshes out so nicely its hard not to think this is an interesting character who is stuck in a bad premise. i dont know if many fanfics have it in them to do her justice but i be Wondering.
#mypost#bella swan#twilight#kristen stewart as bella swan in 2008 was my first love yknow.#like shes only ''not like the other girls'' because the narrative compares her to ''Bitch Women'' like jessica or rose#shes only ''cringe love triangle thirst trap'' because narrative has jacob playing this disgusting ass role#shes only ending up in this cheesy happy ever after vampirism because the mormon writing#but what of the girl.#if smeyer had been more self aware and less religious we could truly explore that. what OF the girl?#like edward or jacob or vampirism and the plot ALL need huge reworks. their intrigue is weaker than their problems#but with bella... idk am i biased i always just her as a fellow abusive family teen. traumatized. coping mechanisms to hell and back#she isnt depressed -at first- but shes. emotionally frozen. carefully frozen. and shy and self conscious and...#scared in these ways that make me think renee was as strong in her negative feelings as she was with her positive ones#god shes just a. really beaten down girl who looks strong. who longs for a family and escape escape escape ESCAPE ESCAPE#she longs to be precious and loved deeply DEEP enough to penetrate her thick skin deep enough it warms her carefully frozen self#its so sad. how badly she needs assurance. renee sucks. charlie an emotionally constipated divorcee. and a fuckin. MAN.#bella needs edwards intense ''mate'' connection. because shes so alone. she needs to hear she will be ONE persons priority. forever.#and its god its so sad#i looked over some fics. ''bella swan with a back bone'' and ''bella swan is a self insert'' are the ovherwhelming majority#but of the girl... im tearing up thinking about my girl.. its ok bella... it gets better.....#she was just in high school. like sweetheart it will get better it will get better it will get better. god im#tearing up about bella swan in the club tonight. she was just 17. she couldnt have been in the club but should have been.
3 notes · View notes
opens-up-4-nobody · 7 months
Text
...
#what does one do when their perception cannot b trusted? im so physically and emotionally exhausted#and i can go from feeling hopelessly terminally bad to completely normal for no apparent reason. and on occasion i can go from normal to i#think i can stay up all night. i never have to sleep again. look how great i can focus. i could kill god.#and i have no emotional object permanence so it feels so stupid when im normal. i cant sympathize with myself in altered states of mind#and it doesnt matter but it makes me crazy the idea that i might not b bip0lar but i just push myself so far that under pressure my mind#splits into the catastrophically positive or negative. but i feel like this is how i have to live. i have to b perfect or pay a blood debt#and thats just how it is. and thats how its been. so at this point ive spend thr last idk 15 years of my life being d#some measure of miserable for no reason. i dont kno y i do this to myself and im 26 now and idk how to stop bc even pushing myself as hard#as i can im so far behind. how am i supposed to do less and not#and not just quit. im compulsive for a reason. there's a fundamental barrier between myself and understanding language but if i do more and#more and more then i can at least try to keep up with everyone else. idk im so tired. and im 26 and im afraid im stuck like this#and i cant even... its like ive split my head in 2 to cope. ive created distance within myself so that i cant fully feel how terrible i make#things for myself. half my brain is always like lol suffer idiot. it throws off my therapists bc i cant take my own pain seriously. ill#laugh and smile while im like yea i feel horrible like most of the time and i dont kno what to do lol. idk so it goes. i think im gonna stop#with the birth control tho. as it doesnt seem to help with my sadness levels. idk if ite making ot worse or not. guess well find out#itll b easier once i dont have to b trained on things. then i wont have to ask a question and burst into tears on my lab mate 🙄#unrelated
5 notes · View notes
hephaestuscrew · 2 years
Text
Wooden Overcoats Finale Liveshow Screenshots Part 1
Part 2 // Part 3
Chapman’s dream
Tumblr media
Rudyard being happy about Chapman leaving
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Rudyard telling Chapman that him leaving means the Funns have won
Tumblr media
Georgie: We probably will miss Eric in some ways.
Tumblr media
Georgie: You’re my mates, and that’s brilliant.
Tumblr media
After Rudyard admits that Georgie is his mate too:
Tumblr media
After Antigone calls Chapman Eric
Tumblr media
Chapman: [about Critchley] Within 24 hours, he was dead. 
Tumblr media
Antigone:  It’s rather too late, wouldn’t you say?
Tumblr media
33 notes · View notes
hxzelwallflower · 1 year
Text
( 🌻 ) - :: I'm sorry my threads have been goofy lately, I'll start on my drafts tomorrow and get back into more serious things then. Maybe post another starter call too, but I haven't felt motivated to do much but a handful of replies so thank you guys for waiting!
3 notes · View notes
raeofgayshine · 2 years
Text
I hate getting into new fandoms for one reason and it’s because besides becoming my entire personality, my brain also inevitably wants to write fics and I never feel qualified enough to do that
#ravenpuff rambles#listen I want to write ofmd fic so fucking bad but I just#the accents man I don’t know if I can do them and I’m probably too soft for this show anyways#but A. I want some proper touch starved Ed who like cries the first time Stede just gently touches him because he’s not used to people being#so kind and he hasn’t been touched like this. this softly. in fucking years#B. I had an idea where Stede told Ed he was going back to close things with his family properly and so Ed is moping on the ship but he knows#Stede is coming back so he bonds with the crew and tells Izzy to fuck off and makes Olu first mate and it’s all okay (he’s sad but coping)#for like a week until they raid a ship. oh look these people are from Barbados. and Ed finds out Stede ‘died’#and he just… loses it of course. asks if you can die from a broken heart because that’s what this felt like. dying.#knowing he had to live in a world without Stede forever because he was gone and never coming back.#the whole crew is mourning Stede except Lucius who is probably the only besides maybe Jim that figured this was probably a fuckery based on#how elaborate the death was but doesn’t want to say until he’s sure#anyways they run into Stede after a couple of days. when he comes aboard all of the crew is sleeping in the Captain’s quarters minus the one#on duty because they were worried about Ed which is really rather sweet of them#and when Ed and Stede reunite Ed refuses to leave his side for days in fear that this could all be a dream#[I did say I have ideas you know]
4 notes · View notes
hecksupremechips · 28 days
Text
Ooooooghhhhhhhhh stressed 🥺
#dont wanna see family tomorrow and im sleeping saur bad lately i couldnt sleep last night and then had a typical fever dream#which gave me a really cute idea for a movie so im gonna keep it in my pocket#but it was one of those things where its like it says a whole lot about me and my trauma and its stressful#um um um and also im juggling all these different things like im sewing im trying to finally write im trying to draw again#while feeling like im failing at it all and then like i still gotta find fuckinnnnn job i neeeeeed money#this time of year is always really hard for me i hate when its warm again i hate easter and i hate knowing that summer is coming#aaghhhh rn im ticking and stimming really bad and im having trouble breathing hnnghhh#and im very sweaty lol i always get so sweaty when i dont sleep good i dont get it#also i think im just horrible like the one person i wanna talk to probably is getting tired of my constant life crisis and how needy i am#and theyre probably off being better without me there and im just a burden and then my therapist idk about him#i dont feel like hes really giving me anything like when i talk about how stressed and unsafe i am hes like you gotta find a way to cope#and he doesnt really tell me how exactly i should do that like mate thats why im here i need the help you cant just listen to me panic and#go ‘wow you need to fix that’ ughhhh and i think hes mad at me because i dont think he believes me anymore when i say im in an abusive#situation and that ive been controlled my whole life by everyone and i have never felt safe#and its just like ughhh like i feel like no one believes me anymore and theyre all fed up with my bullshit incompetence and constant#bellyaching and im a horrible friend and a liar and probably just being dramatic as fuck making myself believe im being abused when in#reality im the abuser the ungrateful brat who treats his family like shit and cant trust them even though they seem so perfect to everyone#and im so stupid and toxic for trying to run away and for being scared to death here#thats how its feeling anyway idk everyone is just. weird and im losing my grip on reality and cant tell whats real anymore
0 notes
rowarn · 6 months
Text
ENAMORED (m.)
soap mactavish / reader !
tags: established relationship, BIG dicked!soap, afab!gn!reader, virgin!soap, sub!reader
cw: loss of virginity, squirting, size difference, teasing, pet names, praise, wet&messy, missionary, mating press, cunnilingus, fingering, pussyjob, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, creampie
note: this is the fic from the pwp royale i posted recently! loss of virginity won so here's the result!!! MDNI.
; with a too-big-cock, he hasn't managed to lose his virginity yet. until he shares a sweet little moment with you, the love of his life ♡
5.7k words
Tumblr media
Soap had been thinking about this for ages. He had been in positions like this before, without a doubt, with previous partners. 
But there was something deep inside him that was breathless over the fact that it was you situated so cute in his lap, dressed all cozy in some clothes you had left over at his place from a previous night you had spent with him. You two had been dating for some time now but he had done his best to avoid being in this predicament because he was worried it would end the same as it had with everyone else. 
Even though Soap was 28, charming and had a lot of luck scoring dates, he was still a virgin. It was the most embarrassing little fact about him. It wasn’t for lack of trying, of course. In fact, all his teammates in 141 were positive he’d gotten laid more times than he could count. But bringing a pretty thing home from a bar always ended the same for him – with them scurrying out of his door with their clothes bundled in their arms the second he pulled his dick out. 
So to say Soap was nervous right about now was in understatement. 
You were so warm against him, smelled so lovely that it made his heart flutter in his chest. Everything about you was so intoxicating that he was terrified this was going to end the same way it always had with other partners – with you becoming intimidated and fleeing with your tail tucked between your legs.
He was so enamored by you that he didn’t think he would be able to cope if you walked out on him like everyone else. 
You pulled him out of his head when you cupped his stubbly cheeks, pulling him in for a deep kiss. His hands flexed against your hips, tugging you even closer on his lap. He was growing harder and harder underneath you and he silently prayed that you didn’t feel it. 
Your hands trailed down to his chest, pressing your palms flat against the firmness there as you deepened the kiss. You sighed sweetly into his mouth, dipping your tongue in to taste him as he eagerly kissed you back. His hands weren’t idle either, going from squeezing your hips to kneading your thighs, bared from your shorts.
Suddenly, he pulled back, eyeing the string of spit that connected your lips before smiling at the way you were panting from a kiss. 
“Can we do…more, Johnny?” you ask softly, rolling your thumb over the scar on his chin.
“Are you sure you want to?” he fires back, meeting your gaze under his lashes.
“Why wouldn’t I?” you smile, adjusting yourself in his lap and he has to fight to hold back the groan from how good the pressure feels even though he’s still confined to his jeans, “I love you. You love me. Of course I want you.”
The way you say it so simply and sweetly makes him smile. He suddenly takes hold of your chin and tugs you close so your forehead rests against his, “I’m not goin’ to lie, sweetheart. I…” he nervously cleared his throat, “I’m a big guy.”
You blink owlishly at him for a moment, “You mean like…”
Your hand slips further down his chest and he quickly intercepts it, taking your hand in his with a nod of his head. Your bottom lip finds its way between your teeth and he can see the way your pupils dilate. 
“Okay…” you whisper, “You can just…work me open, yeah?”
His lashes flutter at those words, a groan getting caught in his chest. His hands find purchase on your waist, easily hoisting you up and tossing you onto the other end of the couch before crawling over you. He immediately begins kissing your neck and you eagerly let your head fall back so he can have more access. His chest is pressed against yours, pinning you down with his weight alone as his hands continue to caress your thighs which are splayed open around his hips. 
His cock is painfully hard in his jeans, throbbing with need when he realizes you've started trembling under such simple touches. You lay there so sweetly underneath him, arms splayed on either side of your head letting him touch you and see you however he wants. Pliant.
“So sweet…” he coos, muffled with his lips pressed against your pulse point. 
You sigh contentedly, heart hammering in your chest when his hands finally move north and start pushing your shirt up. Slowly, over your belly button, over your ribs, catching on the swell of your breasts before you lift your head and let him strip the material off. He tosses it somewhere in the living room but neither of you care where it lands. 
“Shite…” he groans when he leans back on his heels, eyes landing on your bare breasts, “You’re somethin’ special.”
Before you have the chance to offer anything in reply, he's got his lips wrapped around one of your nipples. One hand supports his weight beside your body on the couch and the other carefully slips under the fabric of your panties.  You eagerly spread your legs even more, anticipating his touch where you need him most but he doesn’t make any further movements. 
His hand falls completely still, fingertips resting just above your clit, just the slightest twitch down and he would be touching the little bud. 
His tongue eagerly swipes over the pebbled bud of your nipple that’s trapped in his hot mouth. You let out low sighs of pleasure, mindlessly arching your hips up in hopes to get him to move that damned hand lower — but he refuses, intent on teasing you with its presence so close to where you needed him.
He's got you wound taut, tense and aching for him. He dips down and you think he's going to give you what you want, but instead he uses two fingers to peel your folds apart. You feel like the air gets punched out of your lungs, thighs threatening to twitch closed but are blocked by his hulking form in between them. You can hear the sound of your folds parting, wet and sticky and it makes his cock fucking throb. 
“You’re so wet, you hear that?” he teases, popping off your nipple with a crooked grin. 
“Shut up,” you intend for it to come out biting but it comes out weak and soft, which only makes his grin broaden. 
Your hole clenches pathetically around nothing, drooling and leaking into your panties. You feel like you could cum if so much as a breeze brushed over your clit. You've never been pushed so close to the edge from someone teasing you like this. 
One of your hands finds purchase in his mohawk, tugging the short strands so he is forced to meet you in a heady kiss. You whimper into his mouth and his free hand cups and gropes your tits in his large hand, massaging the soft flesh as he eagerly kisses you back. As you kiss, you attempt to rut your hips up in hopes of getting him to slip between your folds and make you feel good, but it doesn’t work and he chuckles. It’s cute you think you can distract him like that. 
The kiss is messy and sloppy, strings of spit connecting your lips when you finally part to take a breath. You look up at him with a dazed, heady look to your eyes that has him pecking your lips once again before descending back to your breasts. You cry out in surprise when you feel the nip of his teeth against the bud. As he tortures you with his mouth, he takes the chance to tug your shorts down your legs. You eagerly lift your hips to help him rid your body of the offending clothing, tossing them to get lost somewhere alongside your shirt.
Once you’re bare, you let your legs butterfly open, giving him a full view of your completely bare body. 
You’re practically panting when his hand slinks down your body once again, parting your folds with that sticky sound that has heat flushing to your cheeks, much louder now that there’s no clothing blocking it. Soap’s eyes drop to your pussy, index and middle finger holding your labia apart so he can see how your clit throbs and your hole clenches pathetically around nothing, drooling down to the couch. 
“So pretty,” he coos, wishing he could roll his thumb over that pretty little clit just to watch your body twitch from the pleasure but he’s on a miss.
He surges forward again to kiss you, soaking in your happy sigh at the little affection, but it doesn't last long before he's mouthing his way down your body — nipping and suckling at your skin as he makes his way further and further down. 
His large, callused hands grip under your knees and pin you embarrassingly wide open with your knees to the couch. He kisses up your inner thigh and over your pelvis, stopping to press his lips against your hip bones before his tongue dips down and swipes over one of your labia. 
Your taste lingers on his taste buds and he practically moans at the feeling. You gasp, hands flying to his mohawk when he gives the other side the same treatment, cleaning up your mess with his tongue. 
You desperately attempt to rut your hips up, whining with your need to feel his touch properly where you need him but he backs off and waits for you to sink back into the cushions in defeat before pressing a kiss above your clit. His pretty, blue eyes watch every pout and furrow of your brows that crosses your face from his teasing. 
He can tell you’re getting frustrated and needy – just the way he wants you. The fact you’re so pliant and at the mercy of whatever he’s willing to give you is intoxicating. You’re so sweet for him. 
It feels like hours that he torments you, kissing around your thighs and lapping over your folds but never giving you what you actually need. He continues to clean up any mess without actually touching where you desire him most, simply savoring your juices on his tongue. 
Your clit aches, twitching with need as it begs for just the slightest touch from him — something to put you out of your misery. 
“Johnny…” you pathetically whimper, fisting his t-shirt, tugging him closer in hopes of getting him to give you what you want.
His long lashes flutter as he looks at you, “What is it, sweet one? Something you want?” 
“Need,” you correct hastily with a tearful glare. He thinks it’s supposed to be intimidating but he only seems to find the display cute.
He laughs softly, a charming smile crossing his face as he looks completely endeared by you, “Need, huh? Are you always this needy?” 
“Only for you, Johnny!” you whimper, moving your grip on his shirt to his hair again, hoping it’ll give you more leverage but he doesn’t budge. 
He laughs softly, “That’s right, little one. Just for me.”
You feel so on edge, like he’s worked you up to an orgasm without ever actually touching you properly. He thumbs your folds apart, leaving the needy little bud open and exposed to his greedy gaze. You wish so badly he would just breathe against you so you could experience something more than this mind-numbing teasing your boyfriend has subjected you to. It’s pathetic, you realize, wishing for so much as a breath against your bud. But there’s just something about Johnny that always has you hanging on everything he does. You’re enamored, in love.
That thought has you whimpering, sinking back into the cushions of the couch.
“So sweet,” he coos dismissively, smile only widening as you tearfully glare at him.
His gaze darkens at the sound of a sob tearing through your chest and he bites his lower lip when his cock fucking throbs. He didn’t really think he’d be the type to enjoy seeing his partner cry and he’s not even sure he would be into it if it was anyone but you, but here he was. 
Soap thinks you look so precious like this, defeated and waiting for his next move.
“Look at me, sweetheart,” he commands suddenly, chastely kissing your navel when you finally meet his gaze, unfocused and tearful, “There you go, good. Don’t look away now, okay?”
You nod your head, finding yourself getting lost in his unwavering eye contact. His pretty blue eyes and long, soft eyelashes that you could simply marvel at for hours. He was so handsome and all yours and that alone made you even wetter. Your boyfriend was on top of you, giving his all in making you feel good. 
As you're lost in thought and his eyes, his fingers finally dip down to where you need him most, pressing the pads of his digits against your clit. The little bud is so hard and sensitive that the small amount of stimulation has you toppling over the edge immediately. 
Your eyes remain open and locked with Soaps as you cum with a weak cry of his name. His fingers gently circle your clit, sticky, wet circles over the bud to ease you through the high. 
When you finally slump against the couch, thighs twitching against his sides through the aftershocks, he pulls back. Your eyes flutter closed, panting from the exertion of your orgasm. You’re practically boneless as Soap suddenly moves you trembling legs over his shoulders. 
His gaze falls to your swollen, pulsing cunt. Your folds are covered in a slick film and he can still see the way your clit and hole throbs, drooling your cum messily with every clench. Your eyes flutter open, cheeks heating when you see how intently he’s staring at your pussy.
“Don’t stare…” you whine bashfully, voice dragging his gaze back to your face.
“Can’t help it,” he gives you a crooked grin, “You’re so pretty here.”
You whine at his response, kicking your foot against his back in retaliation.
Suddenly it's like all rational thought flies out of his head and he's pinning your knees to your chest. 
You gasp at the change in position, “Johnny!” 
He chuckles at the way you sound shy, as if he didn't just have you cumming underneath him a minute ago. 
The feeling of his breath against your sensitive folds is enough to make your thighs twitch in his grasp. He makes a show, when he finds you looking down at him through your lashes with your chest rising and falling from how hard you're breathing, of letting his tongue fall from his mouth. 
Slowly, he descends, sliding his tongue between your slick folds. You practically wail, your back bowing against the couch when his tongue swirls around your clit, suckling it into his mouth. Your head slams against the couch cushion as your eyes roll back in your head, your hands gripping at his mohawk as you wail his name. 
“Johnny! Johnny! Johnny!” you squeal, legs kicking and flailing at the feeling of him eagerly slurping at your clit.
He backs off for a moment, releasing your bud with a lewd pop. You're panting and trembling, your knees still pressed against your chest, open and vulnerable for him. Your precious cunt is now coating in a slick film of your own cum and his spit.
“Keep yourself open for me,” he commends with a sharp look that makes you immediately do as you’re told. Your trembling fingers grip under your knees, hugging them to your chest. 
He spreads your folds apart with his thumb before his mouth finds its place there again, eagerly slurping up your cunt with a moan. He desperately eats you, swirling his tongue over your clit and dipping it into your clenching cunt to taste your juices. He's messy and sloppy, drool and your cum dripping down his chin and neck.
You cry and tremble beneath the onslaught of his tongue, he introduces two fingers, swiping them against your drippy entrance. You barely even seem to notice, too distracted humping your clit against the flat of his tongue when he lays it flat out for you. 
“Oh, Johnny!” you cry out, toes curling in your fuzzy socks the closer you get to your second orgasm, “Don't stop! Please, don't stop, Johnny!” 
He moans against you, the sound and feeling of it sending you over the edge. When he feels your clit throb on his tongue, he finally slips those two fingers inside you. The feeling of suddenly being stretched and filled sends you flying even higher. Soap has to use his body to hold you down as you kick and squirm from the overstimulating pleasure of having his thick fingers crooking inside you, grinding against that gooey little spot. 
“Johnny-!” you cut yourself off with a deep, long moan as you messily squirt all over the front of his shirt. 
Johnny continues to grind the tips of his fingers into that tender little spot inside you until you simply can’t take it anymore and shove him off with a weak cry. Soap pops the cum covered fingers immediately into his mouth as he watches you twitch and tremble against the couch, tearfully staring up at him. 
“Too much, sweetheart?” he asks, once he’s cleaned his fingers off.
You nod, taking a deep breath, “I-I’ve never…” you trail off and he quirks a brow. 
“Never squirted?” he finishes and you nod, “Well, I’m honored then. I guess we’re even.”
“What do you mean?” you ask, finally uncurling yourself from your position with a weak grunt, opening your arms to pull him close to you, finding yourself needing his touch.
His cheeks heat up, realizing it’s time to finally tell you his little secret, “Well…it’s my first time.”
“Making someone squirt?” you offer him a soft smile but it quickly fades when he shakes his head.
“No, I mean…” he clears his throat, “I mean havin’ sex.”
Your eyes go wide, “Really? But you’re like…really good with your tongue.”
He chuckles softly, forehead falling against your chest, shaking his head, “No I’ve got a lot of experience in foreplay. It’s after that I’ve never gotten to.”
You sit up at that, shock apparent on your face, “You’re a virgin, Johnny?”
“Aye,” he solemnly nods, trying to hide the embarrassment that bubbles under the surface.
“But how?” you question, “You’ve dated a lot. You’re good looking and kind.”
He grins at your praise, “I told you, little one,” he sighs, figuring now would be a good time to properly warn you about what you’re getting into, “I’m a big guy. Most people get scared off.”
Your brows come together in confusion, “Really?”
He nods slowly, carefully watching your face for any signs of apprehension. But you only continue to look confused. 
“Will you show me?” you finally ask. 
“You want to see…?” he finds himself stumbling over your question, heart hammering in his chest when you eagerly nod your head.
Wordlessly he sits up on his knees, fingers fumbling with the button of his jeans. You can see the outline of his cock pressing against the material and he does look big but you want to see him completely. 
He unzips his jeans and reaches inside, hissing at the feeling of his hand wrapped around his neglected length. He finally pulls his cock free, twitching at the feeling of the cool air against him. He’s been leaking precum profusely, incredibly turned on from making you cum twice. 
“Johnny…” you whisper breathlessly, eyes wide as you stare at his length wrapped in his fist, “Holy shit.”
“I told you,” he smiles crookedly but deep down he’s nervous. 
This is the moment that will make or break you. Either he finally gets to be with you, the person he wants to share his love with the most, or you give him that terrified look and go scampering away. 
You reach out and knock his hand away, replacing his grip with your own. His breathing stutters when you give him a few, slow strokes. Your hand is so much smaller than his, unable to touch your fingers around the girth of him. The sight has him biting back a moan because fuck you’re so much smaller than him.
“You’re going to have to really prepare me, Johnny,” you playfully glare at him from under your lashes. 
His brows shoot up in surprise, “You mean you…”
“I love you, Johnny,” you smile softly at him, “I want this with you. Just…take your time, okay?”
“Of course,” he swallows thickly, quickly batting your hand away and urging you to lay back once again. 
You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him in for a kiss, “Let's go to the bedroom.”
“Yeah, yeah we-we can do that,” he stumbles over his words foolishly, making his ears burn red in a way he hopes you don’t actually notice. 
After some stumbling and giggling, the two of you quickly find your way to his bedroom. After shutting the door, you crawl onto the bed, relaxing into the pillow, looking like his own little piece of heaven all naked on his sheets just for him. 
He strips himself where he stands at the foot of the bed, tossing his shirt into the hamper in the corner before letting his jeans and boxers pool at his feet. 
He’s on top of you before you know it, bringing you in for a kiss. As you eagerly spread your legs to accommodate his big frame, he reaches between your bodies and grips his cock again. Your entire body tenses up when you feel him pressing the tip against your folds.
“Johnny, no,” you whine, pressing against his chest, “Y-You’ll tear me open if you try to–”
“Not tryin’ to get it in, pretty baby,” he coos, “Jus’ trust me, yeah?”
You watch as he swipes the head through your folds, sliding the length between them, rutting his hips. You gasp as he grinds over your clit, making your whole body twitch from the stimulation. You’re still sensitive from the previous orgasms he had milked out of you. 
Before long, he pauses.
“Look at that,” he grins, “That’s how deep I’ll be.”
You feel your cunt clench pathetically at the sight of his length resting over your pelvis. You know that when you take him all the way, he’s going to be prodding painfully at your cervix. But you know you’re going to love every second of it. 
Not only is he long, his girth is amazing. You know it’s going to stretch you wide, you can practically feel the phantom burning feeling you know will accompany it. His cock is uncut, messily drooling all over your skin. The prettiest fucking cock you’ve ever seen and it makes your mouth water. 
“Think you can take it?” he teases, playfully tapping the heavy length against your clit. 
You whine and nod, “W-Want you to make me take it, Johnny.”
“Steamin’ bloody Jesus,” he chuckles softly, “Aye, we’ll make it fit, little one.”
Soap’s hand finds its way between your thighs again, two fingers prodding at your entrance as his other hand cups one of your breasts. You lay back in his pillows, staring up at him like he hung the moon and the stars as he stretches you open on those two digits. 
You’re pillowy soft and wet inside, pretty cunt making sticky clicking sounds as he fucks you with them. Your cum coats his skin and a creamy mess begins to form at the last knuckle when he works that tender little spot up top. 
Before long, he’s introducing a third finger. He slowly presses it in alongside the other two, stretching you open carefully and methodically until all three digits are pressed inside the tight clutch of your cunt. 
“Fuck, that’s it,” he encourages, “Open up for me so I can give you my cock.”
You whine at that, “Want your cock, Johnny.”
He groans, pressing a kiss against your knee, “I know you do, sweet thing. Jus’ let me stretch you open for it, yeah?”
You nod and toss your head back, working your hips down against his fingers. He carefully fucks you with them, spreading them inside so you get used to the feeling of being stretched and filled for when the real thing is finally pressing inside. 
Fuck, the thought makes his cock ache. 
His thumb sneaks up and presses against your clit. The extra stimulation makes you clench around them like a vice and you moan so sweetly for him. He can’t wait to feel that around his heavy cock. 
“Johnny, please!” you cry, “I want you already.”
“Fuck, alright, sweetheart,” he grunts, pulling his fingers from inside you with a wet sound. 
He wraps those slick fingers around his length, smearing the mess across the soft skin. It’s embarrassingly desperate, the way he grips your hips and yanks you closer to him. You gasp at the forceful handling but quickly relax into the sheets when he leans down and kisses you again. 
As you’re occupied with his lips and tongue, he grips the base of his length and carefully begins to prod at your entrance. You whimper into his mouth when he starts to press inside.
Just the tip of him is a lot to take and you can't help but wince when that fat head finally pops inside. Soap feels the way you jump and quickly pulls out, biting back a groan when he sees wet, sticky strings of your cum and his pre connecting his cock to your cunt.
He uses the head to circle your clit, making you sigh in pleasure before he’s pressing back inside. This time he, when the head pops inside, begins rolling your clit under his thumb to soothe the ache.
“Just relax,” he coos, slowly circling the bud as he sinks more and more of his length inside. 
The stretch stings and he fills you up more than you’ve ever experienced before. He feels so heavy and hard inside you and his finger on your clit makes you reflexively clench and spasm around him. He moans at the feeling, pretty blue eyes rolling back as he feels half his cock being hugged. 
Before long, he’s balls deep, deeper inside a cunt than he’s ever been in his life. Its euphoric for him. A painful ache settles in your stomach from how he’s prodding against your cervix. He stills, watching your furrowed brows as you get used to being stuffed full of his cock for the first time. 
It dawns on him suddenly that he’s lost his virginity. To you. He’s got his fat cock buried in the one person he adores more than anything on this Earth. 
He’s overcome with affection, surging forward to press his lips against yours. You whine when the angle change makes him press even deeper inside you but you kiss him back anyway. 
He pulls back slowly, “Just relax,” he assures you again, “That was a lot, huh? You took me so well, pretty.”
After a few moments under his careful caresses and kisses, you relax into the bed. Blinking blearily up at him, you flex your hips and stir his cock inside. You whimper at the feeling and he slowly pulls back so only half his length is left inside. 
“Pretty,” he mutters, “P-Pretty and fuckin’ wet.”
“Johnny…” you sigh sweetly, clutching at his sheets as he begins to fuck you in earnest. 
Your tits bounce in time to his thrusts and he can’t take his eyes off them. He’s still a little shell-shocked from having you speared on his heavy, aching cock. He can’t believe he’s got the sweetest thing creaming around him, crying his name. 
“Johnny!” you cry sharply, hands flying to cup your own tits. 
Your eyes are wide, almost like you’re shocked, “What is it, pretty?” he asks, panting.
He watches in wonder as you toss your head back, squealing and trembling. You’re cumming, he realizes. Squeezing and clenching around his cock like a vice. 
“Shite,” he moans, hands trembling as he grips your hips, helping you rut against him as you cum, “‘S it, ride it out for me. Cummin’ nice and hard, hm? Barely even did anything and you’re creamin’ all over me.”
You whimper, eyes rolling at his filthy words. You slowly sink back into the bed with a heavy sigh, heart racing as you stare up at him. Soap loves seeing you like this, covered in sweat and twitchy from how hard you came from nothing but his cock stuffed inside you. 
“More, please, Johnny,” you whine, locking your ankles around his back, locking him against you, “I want more. Please make me cum again.”
He scoffs in disbelief, pressing his hands on either side of your head on the bed, “You just came and you want more?”
“Yes, please?” you ask softly, batting your lashes at him. 
“Yeah, baby,” he whispers, slowly grinding his hips against you, making sure his pelvis grinds against your clit, “I’ll give you whatever you want. This cock’s all yours now, yeah?”
“Mhm,” you whimper, “All mine, Johnny. ‘S all mine. You’re all mine. L-Love you so much.”
“Fuck!” he growls, fisting his sheets as he works his hips faster and faster against you, “Love you too. Love you, love you, love you.”
He can’t even find it in himself to be embarrassed at his babbling. All he can do is work his hips against yours, listening to your pretty moans and the slick sounds of your pretty pussy being fucked. 
Your back arches and you reach between your bodies to circle your clit with trembling fingers. His jaw drops at the sight. He never thought he would have the chance to see a sweet little thing like you working themself to orgasm on his cock like this before. 
“Sweet baby,” he whines, sounding broken and completely broken, burying his face in your neck, “You’re so wet. You’re makin’ such a mess around me. Pretty cunt’s so wet.”
You sob at that, eyes rolling as you toss your head back. You can feel another orgasm brewing, heating your skin and making you tremble underneath your boyfriend's massive body.
“Johnny, please!” you wail, feet kicking against his back.
“What? What do you need?” he pants, drooling against your skin from where his face is still buried.
“Please!” you cry again, pressing against his shoulders to push him back. 
He looks dazed, completely fucked out and stupid from having his cock fucked for the first time. You grab his hand and shove it between your thighs. He quickly picks up what you need and starts rubbing your clit.
“This what you needed?” he pants, “Needed me to play with this pretty clit so you can cum nice and hard again?”
You squeal, jaw falling open as you back bows off the bed. He moans at the feeling of you soaking him, gushing and squirting against his bare chest and all over his hand. His mouth practically waters at the thought of getting to taste you as you cum again.
“Already?” he gasps, “So fuckin’ sensitive, cummin’ so easily for me. Fuck, so good for me. I’m gonna cum, baby.”
You nod your head, still shaking from your orgasm, “F-Fill me up, Johnny. Please. Want you to cum inside!”
“Fuck, are you sure?” he gasps, leaning down to press his forehead against yours.
You nod your head, “Yes, need it, Johnny.”
He fists the sheets on either side of your head as his entire body begins to tremble. His hips lose their rhythm and with a few more, weak rabbiting thrusts, he’s cumming. He cries your name, rutting his hips against yours. The movement causes him to grind against your sensitive clit, making you whimper and twitch beneath him. He grinds painfully against your cervix from how deep he is but it’s worth it to see the pretty way he cums inside you. It's a hot, thick load that fills you up and oozes out the sides of his cock and drips down to the bed. 
Afterwards, there’s a stillness that falls over the two of you. The only sound you can hear is the faint hum of the TV in the living room and the heavy panting between the two of you. 
Soap can’t think of anything to say, all he can think is to lean down and press his lips against yours. He wraps his arms around your body, holding you close to him as you cling onto him, still trembling. 
“Love you so much,” he whispers, muffled against your lips because he’s not willing to pull away.
“Johnny,” you whimper, “I love you.”
He smiles crookedly, pecking your nose and forehead over and over again before you’re giggling and pushing him away. 
With his cock softened, he slowly and carefully pulls out of you, both of you wincing from how sensitive you are. Your thighs are still open and he watches as his cum oozes from your thoroughly abused cunt. His hand slides up your thigh, nearing your folds but you quickly slam your thighs shut, trapping his hand between them. 
He looks up to find you glaring at him, “Don’t even think about it.”
He grins crookedly, shrugging his shoulders, “What’s the matter, baby? Don’t fancy a go again?”
“After that?” you cry, throwing your head back to laugh, “I’ve never cum so much in my life, Johnny!”
“Ah, you really know how to boost a man’s ego,” he chuckles, flopping onto the bed beside you. 
He pulls you close, tucking you against his side, “Hard to believe that was your first time.”
“Aye,” he hums, kissing your temple, stroking your back slowly, “I’m glad it was you.”
“I am too, Johnny,” you snuggle close to him, kissing his bare chest.
There’s a quiet that falls over the two of you. Your breathing slowly begins to even out and he quickly realizes that you’ve fallen asleep. He hugs you closer, protective instincts urging him to keep you safe while you’re well-fucked and vulnerable like this in his arms. 
His heart skips a beat when his gaze lands on his night table, remembering the ring he’s got hidden away within. He wonders when he’s going to grow the nerve to finally ask you to wear it. 
DO NOT REDISTRBUTE, TRANSLATE, OR MODIFY. DO NOT RECOMMEND ON TIKTOK.
6K notes · View notes
brainrotdotorg · 4 months
Text
imagine a dashboard for alligators. what do you think that would look like
2 notes
Tumblr media
🍏gatoridae Follow
Controversial opinion. If you're doing nothing but eating meat, what are you even doing. Remember to include bugs, fruits, and legumes into your diet in order to help aid digestion of the meat that you get from snakes, fish, and mammals.
Just because we have the reputation for eating lots of meat, that doesn't mean we have to stick to it.
🥒biting-you-biting-you Follow
counterpoint: fuit yucky
🪵blog-from-a-bog Follow
wdym reputation of eating meat. i float lik ea log thats what im known for
4,904 notes
Tumblr media
🌿swamp-ass Follow
asked dad if i could go and steal some Floridian guy's lunch and he said "we have prey at home" girl we have been doing shit ALL DAY i am an awesome 600 pounds and I need some meat left on me to deathroll with. let me get a quick snack that i don't need to kill mmmmmmm burgers I want people food soooooo badddd....... i know they shouldn't feed it to me but I have such a lovely smile oh please oh please give me your burger.........
182 notes
Tumblr media
🥗aliali-seeyoulater Follow
mom says it was cold the season she laid me so i have to be a girl. because girls are always born from eggs laid during cold seasons.
cope and seethe mother first of all, second of all, the reason i am transgender is because you kept me too fucking snuggly warm in the nest.
#i guess if you wanted a daughter you should have. idk. made a shittier nest? #thats not really my fault man
81,337 notes
Tumblr media
⛰fuckyeahhugesnout Follow
You'll never guess how I just learned that we have the honor of being the "loudest reptiles in the world"
🫑teethem Follow
Yeah yeah, the 90 decibel mating bellow, we've all heard it.
🤢ch0mper Follow
we've all heard the what
135,633 notes
Tumblr media
🩲gaytorrr Follow
this guy asked if i wanted to see his gator hole and i said fuck yes. why this boy take me into a 65 foot long hole in the mud at the bottom of the lake
6,421 notes
Tumblr media
🏞daily-clawsitivity
✨Remember to take it easy sometimes!✨We thrive in slow-moving waters!✨Even though we can run fast, we get tired fast too-- it's okay to let yourself take breaks!✨Let yourself relax, that's how we made it this far as a species.
mud-rocks-deactivated20140706
Yeah, imagine telling your prehistoric great great great great great great great great great great grandpa or something to calm down and relax when he should be doing nothing but deathrolls. the longevity of the species should be your only goal. It's irresponsible to encourage your fucking species to fall behind even more than it already has? Have some pride, you're not a crocodile.
scalesssss-deactivated20150310
jesus christ calm down
alidile-crocogator-deactvated20140709
Okay, this post has a lot of misconceptions in it. There aren't as many differences between crocodiles and alligators than you think. It's really harmful to think that we have nothing in common with each other. So what if they're carnivores and we're closer to omnivores, or their snouts are more U shaped while ours are V shaped. We're both badass miracles of nature that have no reason to be pit against one another all the time.
Don't listen to guys like this. It's just hateful and small-minded.
stop-jawlock-androll-deactivated20140911
crocs are like. like them shoes that float right
wetlandia898 Follow
i wish i was a crocodile because i could have a virgin birth and i wanted to see what it would be like to eat an immaculate conception.
bigchallengesrealblog-deactivated20190412
welcome to the no notes gator/croc discourse post.
🦖l8rg8tr-z Follow
omg this is the post.... i can't believe i would see this naturally on my dash
🎍taildraggers Follow
Uh are we just going to ignore the virgin birth reply orrrrrrrrr
🐊gator-heritage-posts
gator heritage post
0 notes
Tumblr media
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Follow
hgwiow h
hsfhjs
howw ws i nbevyrboy tyopingssaog oo vd wi hhrth rh thrre cl alawas ?>>
🌴a-l-g-t-r Follow
lmao this idiot never learned how to use their tail to type
#/j lol yeah its kind of hard at first #actually i'd say cut your losses and forget how to type bring the laptop back to the dumpster its not worth it
39 notes
Tumblr media
🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow
am i fucking stupid. i just learned theres another species of alligator other than just me and the guys in my swamp. and i said "oh wow I didn't know that! which one of the two are we haha" and my buddy just stared at me like I was a fucking idiot. how am i supposed to know if no one ever tells me this . WHICH AM I
🍖meet-eat3r Follow
there are only 70-80 mature chinese gators in existence while there are 750,00-1 million mature american gators . do the math.
🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow
i could have just hatched you don't know me.
20,570 notes
Tumblr media
🍀gatortears Follow
a group of queer gators in church call that a congregaytion
#reblogging this one bc none of you appreciate me
1 notes
Tumblr media
👞makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow
I'm seeing the no notes gator/croc post circulate again and ha ha yes it's very funny, but we are NOT starting gator/croc discourse in 2024. lets leave that shit in the past. i know that's not what the post really ended up being about but i am soooooo sick of it.
🌾clawstothewalls Follow
okay, so the one with a fetish for getting turned into handbags is gonna talk down to us now.
👞 makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow
Not to be a pedant but its Shoes Actually. It even says so in the name. Shoes.
2,663 notes
3K notes · View notes
spookebich · 1 year
Text
I don't necessarily believe in soulmates but I do love it as a trope. Especially when one of them knows it and the other doesn't??? that's silly. ur silly. just kiss
0 notes