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laiqualaurelote · 2 days

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Ok but for the file thing, I'm DYING to know more about "The first thing Isaac chopped in half with his hand was the BELIEVE sign" pls <3

thank you for this ask for the WIP game! this is an extremely cracky AU in which the Richmond Players all start manifesting superpowers.

The first thing Isaac chopped in half with his hand was the BELIEVE sign. The second was Zoreaux.

To be fair to Isaac, he had failed to chop Jamie in half. (More on this later.) Thus, while Jamie went off to sulk and Zoreaux ambled up to poke at the broken sign saying, “Maybe we can make a new one?” Isaac thought nothing of clapping him on the back and replying, “Sure thing, bruv.”

His hand went through Zoreaux like a hot knife through butter. Zoreaux didn’t exactly fall apart, but he did sort of peel away in two halves like a melted clock in a Dalí painting. He was screaming the whole time. It was the modern art mash-up nobody wanted to see.

Isaac gaped at him in horror. The other players were yelling. “Bro! What did you do!”

“I didn’t – ” began Isaac.

Zoreaux was still screaming. Weirdly, there was no blood or anything. The edges of him seemed to have been pinched off, like Play-doh.

“We must put him back together!” shouted Dani. He and Richard were on their knees, trying to jam the two halves of Zoreaux back together, only Zoreaux seemed to be drooping and stretching through their fingers. “Mon dieu,” gasped Richard. “He is like cheese! But not good cheese! Like the cheap mozzarella from Pizza Express!”

“Osti de tabarnak de sacrament!” shrieked Zoreaux. “What the fuck is happening!”

“I got the duct tape!” called Will, rushing in. He tossed the roll to Sam, who began trying to tape Zoreaux back together as the rest of the players rushed in to try and help.

“Wait, wait.” Something was happening as Sam’s hands brushed against the halves of Zoreaux. They seemed to be melding back together. “Sam!” cried Dani. “It’s you! You are healing him!”

“Wow,” said Sam, staring at his hands as they knit Zoreaux back together. “Wait, I need to make sure he’s aligned properly. Can I get more light?”

Everyone was temporarily blinded as Dani burst into a blazing ball of brilliance.

“...okay,” said Sam after some time, “way more light than I needed, but thank you.”

“De nada, Sam!”

It was at this point that Trent Crimm walked into the room. He stopped and put on his glasses, as if that would clarify the tableau of the AFC Richmond team duct-taping their cloven goalkeeper together while one of their strikers was blazing like a lighthouse beacon and their captain stood in the corner with his hands apologetically raised in the air.

“What,” said Trent, “the actual fuck?”

*

Trent’s first thought was that he would have to re-pitch his book as a fantasy novel, because nobody was going to take it seriously as non-fiction any more.

“So you’ve got healing hands,” he repeated to Sam.

“I think so?” Sam stared at his hands. “Or maybe I just have the ability to stick things back together. I don’t know. Perhaps I should test it on another injury?”

Across the locker room, O’Brien cleared his throat. “Sam? Can you touch my butt?”

Trent and the players turned to stare at him.

“Not for gay reasons,” O’Brien clarified. “For science.”

“Both of those are valid,” said Sam. “I would be happy to touch your butt for you.”

Trying to ignore O’Brien casually dropping trou in the corner, Trent removed his spectacles and pinched the bridge of his nose. Dani’s brightness was giving him a migraine. “I’m sorry, bruv,” said Isaac to Zoreaux for the thousandth time.

“It’s okay,” said Zoreaux. They had yet to remove the duct tape, just in case, so he looked like a very poorly-wrapped package. “It didn’t actually hurt. I was just freaking out, bro.”

Babatunde was holding on to Zoreaux’s little finger and walking across the room while Bumbercatch followed him with a measuring tape to see how far the finger could stretch. “Three metres!” yelled Bumbercatch as Richard tried to cross the room to his locker and ended up having to do the limbo under the finger. “Okay, take it around the corner!”

“I just thought,” went on Isaac, “‘cos I touched Jamie, and I didn’t chop him in half…” He trails off.

“What?” said Jamie. And then, as Isaac made a move towards him, “Whoa! Are you fucking mental?”

“Sorry.” Isaac backed off.

“Could I test a theory?” ventured Trent. “Bearing in mind that I mean this as a purely scientific inquiry.”

“Sure,” said Jamie. “Whatev – oi!” he yelled as Trent stabbed him in the hand with his pen.

The pen snapped in two. Ink splattered over Jamie’s hand, the skin of which remained unbroken. Jamie screwed up his nose. “That’s disgusting, man.”

“I think you’re invulnerable, Jamie,” said Trent.

Jamie considered this. “That mean I can’t be hurt?”

“I believe so, yes. We’ll have to run more tests to be sure.”

“Huh,” said Jamie. “Sick.”

“It worked!” O’Brien yelled from across the room. “It’s a miracle! I’m healed!”

“Okay,” said Trent wearily, “so we’ve got…five superpowers that have manifested so far. Anybody else feel a superpower coming on?”

“I got one,” called out Jan Maas. “I’m always right.”

The locker room erupted in laughter. “Shut the fuck up, Jan Maas,” they chorused.

Jan shrugged. “I’m just saying.”

#wip ask game #procrasktination #ted lasso #isaac mcadoo #thierry zoreaux #jamie tartt #sam obisanya #dani rojas #jan maas #trent crimm

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drakkywolf · 23 hours

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This happened in Richmond! They say in the caption that it happens once a month in the summer. So:

I didn't include Ted because he doesn't have a car but to me, if he did, he would total at least three like this during his stay.

#ted lasso #ted lasso show #jamie tartt #colin hughes #sam obisanya #isaac mcadoo #dani rojas #moe bumbercatch #richard montlaur #jan maas #thierry zoreaux #will kitman #Instagram

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lilalbatross · 1 year

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#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #tedlassoedit #roy kent #sam obisanya #isaac mcadoo #colin hughes #jan maas #dani rojas #thierry zoreaux #moe bumbercatch #obligatory gifs tag

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anya-chalotra · 1 year

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#that’s a found family your honor

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luminarai · 11 months

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And that was the last time anybody on the team attempted polite small talk with Beard.

I’ve been working on this since eurovision and got it done just in time for the s3 finale 🥲 speaking of eurovision, if you look really really closely at the interval show you might just be able peep Beard in the background…

#my art #ted lasso fanart #Ted lasso #ted lasso art #joke from b99 #coach beard #jamie tartt #sam obisanya #colin hughes #isaac mcadoo #dani rojas #richard montlaur #thierry zoreaux #jan maas #feat. dadi freyr #ok time for my hand to fall off now #Noah Fence is Jamie tartt’s pre-Madonna I will die on this hill that I made myself

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obisamya · 1 year

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3.01 TED LASSO

#ted lasso #tledit #tedlassoedit #tedlassogif #tvedit #tvgifs #appletvgifs #appletvsource #sam obisanya #jamie tartt #colin hughes #dani rojas #thierry zoreaux #gifs.#i missed my besties. my boys. sm #ted lasso spoilers

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tvuniverse · 1 year

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"The only people to blame are the dickheads who steal your shit and put it online. That's why I delete all the photos on my phone."

SAM OBISANYA | Ted Lasso ↳ 3x08 We'll Never Have Paris

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #tedlassoedit #sam obisanya #thierry zoreaux #tedlassogif #appletvgifs #tvedit #cinematv #sophgifs

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kcsplace · 22 days

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#ted lasso #dani rojas #thierry zoreaux #moe jeudy lamour #cristo fernández #international break #ted lasso s03e10 #tl s03e10

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gracie-b-33 · 11 months

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So I think the award shows need a new category “Best Supporting Prop”

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #ted lasso season 3 #ted lasso s3 #jamie tartt #roy kent #nate shelley #spoilers #keeley jones #rebecca welton #dani rojas #colin hughes #isaac mcadoo #jan maas #moe bumbercatch #richard montlaur #thierry zoreaux #afc richmond

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milfloverobisanya · 10 months

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afc richmond during richmond v. west ham [3x04] as textposts

#ted lasso #afc richmond #afc himbos #incorrect ted lasso #incorrect quotes #dani rojas #isaac mcadoo #jan maas #richard montlaur #colin hughes #jamie tartt #roy kent #sam obisanya #thierry zoreaux #thierry van damme #richmond till we die #zava ted lasso #ted lasso tv

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fruity-phrog · 1 year

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Seriously. These boys are such himbos, I was laughing my ass off when they were fixing Ola’s. Half of them were wearing construction helmets when they were painting walls and fixing tables and chairs. Van Damme went shirtless with overalls just because he could. Colin held a massive paint-roller but didn’t appear to be doing anything with it. They all wore high-vis jackets for absolutely no reason. Richard decided that booze and construction work went well together.

#(except for moe)#(moe you will always be famous)#tl #ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #van damme ted lasso #thierry zoreaux #colin hughes #richard montlaur #cedar crap

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thewanderingace · 11 months

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I'm telling you, man, if y'all play hard, play smart, play together and just, you know...

#tedlassoedit #tedlassogif #ted lasso spoilers #ted lasso #afc richmond #my gifs #mod post #stephs stuff #layout #sam obisanya #jamie tartt #isaac mcadoo #richard montlaur #moe bumbercatch #dani rojas #colin hughes #thierry zoreaux

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darwinsfinchesx · 1 year

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The duality of Dani Rojas

Ted Lasso | 3.10 'International Break'

#dani rojas #thierry zoreaux #ted lasso #tedlassogif #ted lasso spoilers #tedlassoedit #sitcomedit #usersitcom #tvedit #finchgif

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trentcrimmisgay · 10 months

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i’ve been clearing out old screenshots in my camera roll but i have ted lasso brain rot so you all have to see what they made me think of (part five. more posts)