#theyfucking suck and noone wants them and now i have imposed that feeling on you too

[mariamegale]

LuzToye & their cute moments?

these two doofuses is2g. tell me there is a more secure relationship out there and i might actually fight you on that. 

thank you for the prompt <3

1,081 words, rated T.

oh fuck me, not a corporate event.

---

“Hey, asshole,” Luz calls out when he gets to their table.

“Don’t call me an asshole,” Toye replies, sounding mildly hurt and confused as he’s suddenly assaulted with a boy jumping down in his lap. Luz pats him softly on the cheek in apology.

“Sorry. My dear sunshine man, light of my life, my one and only snuggleboy—“ Joe rolls his eyes like he’s trying to get them stuck in his head, and George grins at him. “What are you doing Saturday night?”

“Uh, nothing I think. Depends, why you asking?”

“Well, I have just gotten invited to a corporate event. I know,” Luz adds when there’s a gaggle of surprised noises from the table, “I only thought it happens in the movies, too, but here we are. Anyway, I was wondering if you’d be my plus one?”

Toye looks at his boyfriend like he’d rather put his fist to a cheese grater, knowing George most likely feels the same way and not understanding why he would suggest they do that to themselves.

“Come on, it’ll be fun. We’ll put on uncomfortable clothes, have dry conversations with people who have power over me, leave under tidy circumstances and try not to fuck in the taxi from all the pent-up excitement.”

“Gee, save it on the sales pitch, Georgie, you really know how to convince a guy,” Joe says drily. George kisses him wetly on the cheek, earning another round of noise from the other people at the table. “Why don’t we just skip all the bullshit, take a taxi home tonight and fuck in it then? Lot more fun.”

“It’s like they don’t even know we’re here,” Buck says behind them, nodding at Muck across the table. “Hey, Skip, can you see me or have I gone invisible?”

“Bright and clear,” Skip replies, taking a drink of his beer. “I just think you’ve forgotten to think about whether Luz and Toye care about you in the first place.”

There is shouting and peanuts thrown, but Luz doesn’t care about the calamity behind them beyond an eye roll of his own.

“Come on, Joe,” he repeats instead, nudging the other man’s forehead with his own. “I have to go. I just really want you to be there, it’ll make the whole thing so much more bearable.”

God damn this tiny little man and the iron grip he has on Joe’s heart. He rubs one hand over George’s leg, looking at his mouth in an obvious request. “Okay, but only because you asked nicely.” Luz kisses him with a lopsided smile, and Joe lifts his other hand to stroke his cheek. “But I expect us to get kicked out of that taxi for indecency.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way, Joe.”

They get a few more kisses in before the shower of peanuts hit them, being stopped less by Luz yelling abuse at his friends and more by the murder glares the bar staff send them. Babe and Eugene end up going over to pre-emptively put a collectively raised fifty bucks in the tip jar.

That turns out to not be the first tip of Joe and George’s night, as they later tell the driver of the taxi they end up calling for to just keep his eyes on the road.

———

“Jesus fucking Christ, I hate suits,” Joe grumbles when he gets into another taxi three days later, already loosening his tie. Luz gets in next to him, telling the driver his address before leaning back with a very deep sigh.

“Preaching to the choir, Joe,” he says, revelling in the way he can finally let his posture relax for the first time the whole night. He doesn’t hate his job, really, despite the way this anecdote makes it look. He just hates having to play dress-up with people who know they’re playing dress-up, because everyone in the fucking world knows they’re playing dress-up, yet acting like it’s completely sincere and spontaneous.

Like people from five different levels of management all just happened to show up at the same floor in high heels and ties on a day off to spend three hours drinking half a glass of champagne and fake-laughing at non-jokes.

George needs to get a new fucking job, where this shit won’t be expected of him or of his partner.

Speaking off. He looks over at Joe, who’s trying to pull his tie off with a mildly annoyed facial expression, arms bumping into the roof of the cab. Luz can’t help but smile, reaching over to bat his hands away.

“Here, let me,” he says, untying the thing completely before dragging it out of Toye’s shirt lapels and stuffing the tie into his own pocket. “That’s what you get for being so fucking tall.”

“Just ‘cause you’re fucking tiny,” Joe mumbles back, and George laughs. They don’t speak much for the rest of the ride, just enjoying the comfortable silence instead.

Once they’re home, door locked behind them and jackets tossed on the kitchen tables, do they really talk again. George is on Joe’s lap, kissing him slowly, unhurriedly, while Joe’s thumbs are drawing small circles on his hips.

“Hey,” Luz says eventually, pulling back just enough to speak. “Thanks for coming with me tonight.”

“Nothing to say thanks for,” Joe replies easily, leaning forward so he can press a few soft kisses to the space behind George’s jaw. He gets pulled back after just one by a pair of hands on his face, his boyfriend looking at him seriously.

“Hey, yes it is,” George says, a small frown on his face. “You didn’t have to come, but you did. Maybe it’s just a shitty, snobby office party, but it’s still more than you had to. Thank you.”

“Damn it, Georgie,” Joe says with a smile, moving his hands up to his boyfriend’s waist. “Of course I had to come. Not because anyone forced me to, but because it’s what a decent guy does for his boyfriend. And you deserve a decent guy, you know?”

George snorts, but kisses him nonetheless. “I don’t know, I was kinda hoping for something more indecent, personally, but if you wanna go down the chivalrous route I’m sure there are some dishes in—“

He doesn’t get much more out before he’s pushed sideways down on the sofa, laughter between them as they let each other egg their pace up. That says it better than they could with words, anyway.

#my writing #ask #prompt #why a corporate event you ask? #why the fuck not i say #theyfucking suck and noone wants them and now i have imposed that feeling on you too #luztoye #george luz #joe toye #band of brothers #Anonymous